#i am a little speechless! i will reread this again tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that and

[unwrittenlibrary]

Tee’s Summer Reads 🖤

hi all! as summer comes to a close and classes start back up again, i wanted to come on here and share some pieces i read over break that i just loved.

as always, heed to any and all warnings each creator has put in place. eighteen plus spaces deserve respect and you are urged to show them it.

— ➶ —

Bucky Barnes

i wished one the moon for you by @sunmoonandbucky • “After losing Bucky, you were devastated. So when Howard Stark asks for volunteers for an experiment, you're the first in line.” -> 40s buck & present bucky? love that lasts through time? love it

the shot heard round the tower & unwarranted weakness by @pellucid-constellations • “you just want to know if bucky has feelings for you. bucky just wants you to be okay.” -> these two pieces can be read separately, but i highly suggest reading them both because bucky is written so well and they made me feel warm all over. 

see the world the way you do by @vanderlustwords • “you start to see color when you meet your soulmate. bucky thinks that soulmates are a one of a kind thing.” -> there are So many lines in this that just... sit with you. i felt so much reading this. that tight feeling in your chest, pure happiness, anger... i just absolutely loved this. 

a little old fashioned by @gogolucky13 • “bucky is a bit subtle in telling you he likes you.”-> behold...sweet, shy comfort fic bucky. i go back and read this when i’m sad. 

he’s a good friend by @markandlexies • “reader is tired of watching bucky go on dates with leah and flirt with sarah.” -> give me all the oblivious, pining friends to lovers. just incredible writing and a truly lovely piece. 

tap by @houseravenclaws •  “bucky never talked much, he fell in love anyway.” -> you KNOW i already love sarah’s writing, it was on my last list. HERE’S MORE! this fic tore me apart in the best way and i still think about it all the time. it has become a go to. 

all the good things by @/houseravenclaws • “bucky’s been a little more than happy recently. sam thinks it has something to do with the pretty girl on the team.” -> need i say more? i needn’t say more. 

i love you, you idiot by @chrisevansjellybeans • “we’re best friends but won’t say we’re in love trope.” -> this fic made my heart sore. i love when writers have the ability to show love through the smallest of details and this fic did that so well. 

the things you’ve done by @divine-mistake • “what if the world ended tomorrow and all he did was spend his last day with you thinking about how you never hold his metal hand and you never walk on his left side and you constantly reach for his right arm?” -> OHHHHHHHHH MAN oh man this fic left me in shambles. absolute shambles and gave me a big, bright smile. insecure!bucky just does something to me. bucky is written perfectly in this. 

cornerstone by @agentofbarnes • this is a piece of zee’s (incredible) barnes’ au where bucky and reader (babydoll) are married with kids. -> i love the entire barnes’ au, but this piece honestly meant so much to me??? seeing bucky as an incredibly loving and open father just makes me so happy. 

leather jacket full of cats by @bucksfucks • “bucky brings home kittens.” -> nora doesn’t write fluff, but when she does it comes out absolutely incredible???? bucky and kittens?? PLEASE this made so happy (hi keep an eye out for more of nora’s work in the nsfw section) 

bulova by @babycap • “in the five years between the two snaps that changed it all, life had moved on, as life is want to do. In the aftermath of that final battle, you discover that time waited for no one (least of all you), and those you loved marched forward into it without you. Sam suggests you volunteer at the local retirement community to keep you busy, keep your mind from lingering on what—and who—you lost. In giving back, you find that time can be just as generous as it is cruel.” -> this is a babycap (dev my love) fan account. i have never read such beautiful words & i am always so stunned by the amazing works that dev puts out. i get so excited to read them. 

sunset by @belladonnabarnes • “bucky meets a pretty girl and her little sister at the zoo.” -> how did you know it was my dream to meet bucky at the zoo jaye?????? ahhhhh i loved this fic so much, it was so incredibly sweet i had the dopiest smile on my face when reading it. 

crawl home to her by @wkemeup • “stranded without coms, alone, and bleeding out in the middle of a russian snow storm, bucky is content to let nature take its course. only you won’t seem to let him go.” -> this fic is a masterpiece. a genuine piece of art. i was on the edge of my seat reading it, hoping i could faster than possible just to find out if bucky made it.

suburbia by @/wkemeup • “posing as husband and wife, you and bucky infiltrate a quaint suburban neighborhood in search of a hydra hacker. perhaps if you weren’t so in love with him and he hadn’t broken your heart, the act of pretending wouldn’t hurt so much.” -> yeah this one HURT. in the best way, an absolute favorite. so so so good.

that was premonition, i think by @divine-mistake • “sometimes you wish you had never fallen in love with bucky. screw that ‘it’s better to have loved and lost’ bullshit. you wish you had never fallen in love with bucky barnes.” -> just so so good. i was speechless after reading.

Others

Sam Wilson

the summertime and butterflies all belong to your creation by @golden-bucky • “you’ve never been one for baseball, but sam wilson is enough to change your mind.” -> ok. listen. i HAVE always loved baseball and this fic made me dream of mr. sam wilson in a lil uniform and me cheering him on. it was so sweet and i just loved it. a dream come true.

scary love by @bvckysmoon • “the first ‘i love yous’ are always scary.” -> being in love with sam wilson? yes please! this fic is so tooth achingly sweet, i adore it.

that way by @belouva • “you don’t know what label to fall under anymore. were you his roommate, friend or his lover?” -> i love roommate! sam… the first two parts of this series are so good.

Steve Rogers

you don’t know by @/divine-mistake • “until her gaze falls on you and her lovesick puppy dog eyes morph into saucers, leaving her frozen in pure shock. that visage quickly melts away to reveal a smug smile, aimed right at you, and you know exactly what she’s thinking at this moment.” -> steve & plus-size reader! i actually teared up, this fic hit really close to home and is beautifully written.

Spencer Reid

the one where everyone finds out by @reidscanehand • “Spencer Reid is in love with Y/N, and she’s in love with him...only they don’t know it yet...and they might be are definitely going to be the very last to know. And since Spencer and Y/N happen to be surrounded by the best profilers in the country, the rest of the team is, of course, the first to piece together the romance. Little by little, bit by bit, the team solves the case of Spencer and Y/N.” -> i constantly go back and reread this fic… it means so much to me!

work wife by @differentkettleoffishalltogether • “Spencer can’t help but feel a little jealous when it seems like his best friend is interested in someone else.” -> best friend spencer & love confessions? yeah that’s what i like.

Aaron Hotchner

dream a little dream by @ssahotchswife • “Following an injury, the reader dreams about time spent with Aaron Hotchner and his son. She relives heartbreak about Aaron's relationship with Beth and the love she has for Jack. Aaron must come to terms with his feelings for the reader when she wakes.” -> aaron hotchner is my comfort man and this fic makes my chest ache

NSFW

just friends by @/bucksfucks • “you and chris are just friends, right?” -> chris evans please i’m free on saturday

forbidden fruit by @/bucksfucks • “you attempt to set your ex’s things on fire. bucky has a better idea.” -> dadsbestfriend!bucky has my heart and it’s literally because of nora’s writing

appointments by @buckycuddlebuddy • “bucky barnes, finally being able to live freely in 21st century, accidentally gets a fuck buddy and starts to rediscover himself. the only weird thing about this situation is that you have to make an appointment to get railed by him.” -> ooooooooof i love this lil series so much

— ➶ —

these are all of my summer reads!!! i’ll definitely post another one after fall semester, this will most likely be a seasonal thing.

[cinnaminsvga]

what are your favorite fics you read for every member? like the ones that resonated and left you a changed woman when you finished. could be because of characterization, or plot, or nostalgia, just the ones that come first and easy for every member, like, the iconic ones for you. can be mxm. i'm asking cause i just read worldwide lonesome and. damb. just. i kinda feel like i read seokjin’s diary or something? like it felt invasive just bc of how REAL he felt, you feel me? so. i'm curious about u

this is such a loaded ask because honestly, i had to think really deeply about this!! there are so many fics out there that have changed me as a writer and as a person in general that its hard to pick just seven... but i’m glad you mentioned worldwide lonesome because that fic is definitely!! fucking!! up there!! it might actually be my #1 seokjin fic, so you already got me there. but man... i put a lot of thought into my answer because my reading list is a never-ending pool of queerness and angstiness, as those tend to resonate the most deeply with me (since i am, after all, both queer and angsty HAHAH) so uhhh... here i go!! (also i apologize that these are mostly mxm... weirdly enough, i’m kind of more affected by those bc i relate more to them than reader inserts for some reason... the world is bombarded with hetero representation, so excuse me for clinging to my sole source of queer love lmao)

➤ for seokjin:

worldwide lonesome by loindexter [yoonjin] - i already mentioned it, but MAN... this fic left me stunned. the characterization of seokjin is what gets me the most, and by god, i am a SUCKER for coming out stories. as a closeted queer person, i’ve always wondered what other people’s experiences are with coming to terms with their sexuality, and op really hits the nail on the head. seokjin in this fic just feels... so real. like you said, it almost felt like i was looking into his diary!! it was maddening and tearjerking and oh so fucking human... you could feel his turmoil as if it were your own... and yoongi!! dear god, yoongi... that sweet fool... this fic just struck a cord with me because of how intimate and vulnerable it felt. i really hope i can write a fic like that in the future.

➤ for yoongi:

here comes the sun by fruitily [yoonkook] - this was unequivocally the hardest decision i’ve ever had to make in my life, mostly because i’ve read a plethora of yoongi fics in my day and it is quite literally so difficult to pin down a singular fic that changed me the most as a person. the reason i chose this certain fruitily fic (op will always be my biggest writing idol... if i could, i’d list down their entire masterlist as my favorite yoongi/jungkook fics of all time) because of the emotions it made me feel. there’s always something a bit sad about summer romances, and i’ve always been a sucker for that sort of trope because of the many possibilities you can do with it. it’s just... the way yoongi was portrayed here was just so darn REAL,,, you could almost physically feel his increasing want, his slow realization that yes, he does love the bucktoothed kid from summer camp. i absolutely adore the interactions he has with all the characters, because you can almost fool yourself into thinking he’s a real person. he’s a friend, and you’re watching him come to terms with what it means to love someone you only see once a year. dear lord i love that dude i’m gonna go cry now!!

(also bc i’m cheating but i also recommend the nights really were made for saying things you can't say tomorrow day by siderum... first yoonkook fic i ever read and dare i say it literally changed me as a person. there are no words.)

➤ for hoseok:

depaysement by 1honeypot (oilblotter/obiwrites) - okay i know this is fucked up for me to recommend a fic that doesn’t even exist on the internet anymore (op deleted her account on tumblr and has moved to ao3 but she’s never gonna reupload this fic again unfortunately) but MAN i still remember that fic to this day. it was so fucking GOOD and it made me realize the potential reader fics had that i never knew was possible. the entire plot was the usual make-over cliche (popular trendy girl makes the nerd hot yadah yadah yadah) that i had thought wouldn’t be interesting, but op managed to turn that trope into her own. it was hilarious, hot, moving, relatable... just ticking off every point that makes a fic great. i miss that fic so dearly and if you were some of the lucky few who managed to read it when it was still around... i think you all understand.

➤ for namjoon:

beta tau sigma by bazooka [namjin] - i cannot count the amount of times i’ve reread this fic. like, no joke, i probably memorize a few of the chapters from rereading it alone. holy fuck,,, as you can tell, i have a pattern when it comes to my fave fics and it’s all about: GAY PANIC THE MUSICAL!! yea... i just really like fics about self-discovery because MAN as a young adult traversing the mysteries of human nature and sexuality, i sincerely relate to namjoon in this fic. “am i gay, or am i just gay for my best friend?” is a question i have asked myself NUMEROUS times... dear god, namjoon is just a walking catastrophe and i!! could not!! relate!! more!! the plot flow and immersion you get from this fic is out of this world. you almost feel like you’re in the same frat as them!! i also love the way op made even the side characters have their own story arcs and backgrounds... they are what inspired me to give life to even the smallest of characters bc it just heightens the reading experience imo!! they really do feel like your friends in this fic, and this fic will always be my sources of comfort.

➤ for jimin:

darling, just say you’ll say by tusaisbts [yoonmin] - have i not sung this fic enough praises? i know it looks weird from the premise... cowboys? mail order brides? i thought it was odd at first too, but believe me when i say you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. jimin’s growth as a character here left me absolutely speechless!! i just love his development: from a scared stranger dropped off in the middle of nowhere to a smart and capable teacher who can hold his own in this small rural town. i especially love how he interacts with yoongi, because op really makes you want to root for them. you want them to fall in love, to make their relationship work out. that yearning for two characters to get together is something i want my own readers to feel, and there aren’t enough words in my vernacular to explain how happy i was when everything turned out well. and jfc... rancher yoongi? got me so fucking hot n bothered and now i will forever be enamored by the thought of rugged yoongi... jfc...

➤ for taehyung (& jimin!!):

mudlands & yellow acacia by nonheather [vmin] - i remember the day i read this like it was yesterday. i had a final to study for, but instead i read this entire thing in one go and then i cried my eyes out even until the moment i walked into my exam room. i don’t know how else to describe this other than it was otherworldly. it was cozy. it was heartbreaking and magical and downright lovely. i especially loved the way taehyung was here... so fucking whipped for park jimin. he loved like no other man could, and jimin might have been a little too bullheaded at first, but they make it out okay. i’m not really one to believe in soulmates, but this fic almost made me believe they could be. it made me yearn for the first time, and i think that counts for something. to love another person and to have them love you back... op made me believe in love. 

➤ for jungkook:

years since you’ve been here by ameliabedelias [namkook] - okay maybe i’m just a crybaby and i cry at every fic under the sun but dear god this fic... might be The Fic That Changed Me As A Person. like, of course the other fics were mindblowing but this one in particular... wow. trampled all my expectations and caused a garden to bloom in my heart. jungkook is so sweet, so lost... he feels too much and he aches for namjoon. i know all too well that feeling of melancholy... when you love someone you’re not supposed to. coming of age stories will always have a soft spot in my heart, because i always tend to project myself onto the main characters. i want to grow and find my own destiny. i want to learn and be happy. jungkook finds his way, tumbles and trips the entire time, but he gets there. a symbol of queer triumph.

[fizzyhosh]

Binding

Chapter Five

Prologue | One | Two | Three | Four | Five

Summary: Remus likes things predictable, orderly, and punctual. His comfort-zone is compromised when he meets (Y/N), a girl who is indifferent, spontaneous, and not outwardly friendly. Despite their obvious differences, he can’t seem to stay away from her, even when they aren’t working side-by-side at the most boring job on the planet.

Word Count: 1269

A/N: HONESTLY it’s been a minute since I’ve posted any fic, let alone a part of Binding. Please forgive me. I’m literally the WORST. I hope this is good enough for you to forgive me ! Also, only ONE MORE PART of this series!!! 

•••••

bind·ingˈbīndiNG

noun 

1. a strong covering holding the pages of a book together.

adjective 

1. (of an agreement or promise) involving an obligation that cannot be broken.

•••••

"You don't have work today," Sirius reminded, glancing over his bowl.

"I know..." Remus said slowly as he bent down and scanned the contents of the fridge.

"Then why are you leaving?"

He stood up slightly and peeked over the door at Sirius. "Am I only allowed to leave the house for work?"

"I mean," he paused to swallow his food before continuing, "you never left the house before you got the job."

"Fair point. It's nice outside today, though."

Sirius frowned. "Are you keeping a secret?" He perked up. "Are you going to see Y/N? Outside of work? Like a date?"

"No." Remus shut him down quickly. "Why do you seem so disappointed by that?"

"You like her and I want you two to hit it off."

"We're friends, Sirius. She has a boyfriend and I'm not a home wrecker. We are going somewhere but it's not a date, alright?

Sirius tried holding back his large grin. "Have fun, mate."

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing. I'm just excited for you to start living your best life. I also can't wait for her to realize you two are perfect for each other. Just all around excited."

"You're starting to sound likes James. Go back to the edgy Sirius we all know and love. I'll be back later this afternoon."

"Bye, loverboy."

Remus flipped him off and got on his bike, making his way to where he and Y/N agreed to meet up. He waited a while, wondering if he misread the time they were supposed to meet. He pulled out his phone, alternating between rereading "noon" in the text and looking at the time at the top of his screen. It was close to 12:45 and he was about to head home, only partly devastated that the love of his life didn't show up. That was a an understatement, he was definitely heartbroken.

As he got back on his bike, Y/N yelled across the small park. Remus looked up to see her disheveled and upset. He dropped his bike as she approached him and almost knocked him over as a constant stream of words flowed out of her mouth.

"I can't believe you waited, I'm so sorry I'm late, my alarm didn't go off because my phone died and since my phone died I couldn't text you and I was just hoping you were still here because I value our friendship and ohmygosh I can't believe you're actually still here."

Remus put his hands on Y/N's arms, smiling lightly. "First, breathe."

Y/N nodded and breathed deeply.

"Second, of course I waited. I value our friendship too. And considering how many times you've almost been late to work, I figured you'd be late to this as well." That was only a small lie. He did expect her to be a little late, but not 45 minutes. He also was just trying to calm down the sound of raging butterflies at the "I value our friendship" part by cracking a joke, which worked for a moment until she smiled and riled up the butterflies again. Remus dropped his hands, hoping the lack of contact might settle the noise in his head.

"You are really the nicest person I have ever met."

That felt like a friendzone sentence, which really helped the butterfly noise situation because they immediately stopped, an aching heart replacing the wild animals.

"You look like you need a coffee."

"Yes, I do," Y/N said, leading them to the coffee shop across the street. They talked for a while until their presence was considered loitering and had to find a new place to chat.

Remus liked how easy it was to get lost in a conversation with her. Unfortunately, he was so comfortable that he let words slip that he never intended Y/N to hear.  

"My anniversary is tomorrow and I still have no idea what to do," Y/N said with a sigh as they walked around the park, admiring the weather and nature.

Remus bit his lip, not a fan of this conversation. Y/N's boyfriend really seemed like a piece of trash. "Well tomorrow is doomed for me too. Lily's party." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and kicked the ground.

Y/N nodded. "We should just convince the world tomorrow is cancelled so neither of us have to do our stupid things."

"There must be something that makes you look forward to your anniversary?" Remus prompted as he looked at her sideways.

She sighed and paused for a long time before asking, "Do you think I should break up with him?"

He was taken aback. Here he had the chance to give great advice that would make her break up with her boyfriend, but instead, he let slip the dumbest thing he could have.

"Well, to be honest, I might not have started checking out so many books in the first place if I knew you had a boyfriend, so yeah." His eyes widened as she frowned.

"What?" she asked with a small, confused laugh.

"Uh.."

"Wait... did you only go to the bookstore because I worked there?"

"Y/N, it's not as weird as it sounds."

"Really, Remus? Because it sounds like you stalked me until I offered you a job."

He shook his head vigorously. "No, it's not like that."

"Then what exactly did you do?"

"Look," he took a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair. "Just let me say what I need to say and then you can fire me and block my number and do whatever else you want. I'm going to be 100 percent honest right now."

Y/N crossed her arms, looking insecure now that she discovered Remus didn't just come into the bookstore because he read super fast. One of the only people she felt she could trust these days didn't seem to be who he said he was.

"I've never been very outgoing or friendly or fluent with words. The first time I saw you, I was completely speechless at how beautiful you were. I couldn't think of the right words to say to you so I just left. The thing is, Y/N, I've never had trouble forgetting about random people or getting thoughts out of my mind but you drove me crazy from the moment I saw you. I couldn't even watch The Princess Bride because I could only think about all the things I could have and should have said to you in the bookstore. So I went back the next day, ready to say all these amazing things but you had your hair up and you looked so perfect that all my confidence just erased completely from existence. I know it sounds crazy but I kept checking out books so I had an excuse to go back and talk to you, but I just could never find the right words to say to you. After I found out you had a boyfriend, I swear I never intended to ruin that or anything. I meant what I said earlier. I do value our friendship. A lot."

He waited and scanned Y/N's face for any hint of any emotion. He'd even be fine with her being royally pissed if he could just tell what she was thinking.

"I have to go," she mumbled simply, emotionless. "Thanks for being honest with me."

Remus stood as he watched her walk to her car, running her hands through her hair. He felt a few tears fall as she drove off, wondering in what world would things have been different?

He got on his bike and rode home, trying to make it back before he started spiraling. Remus' spiral of emotions was something best experienced in the safety of a house with his best mates there to look after him.

Permanent Tags: @aheadfullofsherlock @luna-xxxxx @sjriusblck @gabiatthedisco @siriuslyimmoony @young7711 @diggorysghost @niffleurs@flowercrownchic @havecourage-darling @swellwriting @bluemadcnna @jamcspotters @heartbeats-wildly @mayakblack @sleep-i-ness @sly-vixen-up2nogood @mugglebornmadness @thefantasticalfangirl @portkeys-and-prose @weasleyswizardweezes

Remus Tags: @knowledgeisthebomb @the-best-fanfition-ever @harrypotterimmaginaa @stateofloveandvedder @gryffindorprincess379 @finnofamerica @serenefreakgeek @wwhitewwolff @riddikulus-remus 

Binding Tags: @wolverinesbeer @ceruleanrainblues @the-apple-princess @acutelittlehufflepuff @oceanaged @coolepowersthings @elfenbensord @blubmachine @fortisfiliae @wolfenbeck @stylespowus @mamapuritysan @golddustcoven @rochelle-the-ravenclaw @marauderskeeper @marauderwolfstarjily   

[mackenzie-wolf]

I'm Here all Week p.2

MC = Emily/Milly

- Emily meets some new writers and a few new friends who are taking a keen interest in her, much to James' dismay -

Part 1

----

James passed Emily the key-card to her room. As she took it, her nerves started to settle in.

"Hey, James?" She said abruptly, gaining his attention as he walked towards the next door. "You... you really think I should be here? I mean I know I've had a few successes, but... I don't know. Impostor syndrome?"

James took a tentative step towards her and placed his hands on her arms, gingerly brushing them with his thumbs. "Emily, you may not see it, but your writing is well above the average monotonous pages that are published every day." He smiled at her but she never met his eyes. Instead her head was hanging, but James could easily see the blush that she was trying to conceal. "If I'm honest, when I finished the second book of your series, I tried looking for your other works; I was sure that you had written before."

"Why?" She finally looked up at him. Her eyes were tearful as self doubt took its toll on her confidence.

"Because, when I first started writing, it was texts like yours that I aspired to. To hit off with a winning series on your first try is amazing enough. But the intricate way you write is something that would only be expected from seasoned authors."

"You're supposed to say that... You're my friend." At the sound of her words, James' thumbs stopped brushing the soft skin of her arms.

"Yes I am. Which means I owe it to you to tell you if your books are terrible. And when you release one that I dislike, I'll do just that" He said, ever reassuringly. "And furthermore, as your friend, im taking it upon myself to buy the first round tonight. We can meet some other authors, or just drink. Its your choice."

"Ok.." she grinned with new energy. "Give me an hour and I'll be ready. Meet you in the lobby?"

"See you soon" he smiled as he turned back towards the door to his room. As he closed the door behind him, James let out a long sigh that seemed to have been trapped inside of him. He thought about Emily sitting next to him, the whole car ride over, soaking wet. Her clothes clinging to her skin... the way that.. 'Damn it! I can't think way!' James thought to himself.

'Sure we've flirted but she's never admitted to being interested in going further than friends. But...' His mind wandered again. James thought back to the first and only other time he and Emily had gone for a drink.

James checked his phone again, rereading the text that Emily had sent him, giving him directions to the bar. As he saw it come in to view, James gave a laugh when he noticed the sign.

MacKenzie's Bar & Video Arcade

As he walked inside, his eyes strained against the flashing lights of the machines. Walking through a small crowd of people he glanced over at what had their attention. Just over the heads of the crowd, he could see a mess of wavy, brown hair being thrown back and forth to pounding music. James made his way to the front of the assembly and saw Emily playing on the dance machine with practiced ease. The short guy playing opposite her was struggling to keep up. Taking note of the plastic cup of beer in Emily's hand that she was somehow managing not to spill, James went to the bar and ordered two more before walking back to the machine. As the music came to a stop, Emily was the winner by more than double her opponent's score. The short guy flung his arms around Emily, yelling cries of defeat. As Emily turned, she saw James stood a few feet away from the crowd. Finishing her beer, Emily linked arms with her friend and walked over to where James was waiting. Before she had a chance to say hello, her friend said something to her, just out of reach for James to hear it. Then he gave her a long hug and a quick kiss on her cheek before running off and calling back. "LOVE YOU, MILLY!"

"LOVE YOU TOO" Her words made James' stomach sink. He hadn't come here just because he was interested in getting closer with Emily, he genuinely just enjoyed her company. But still...

Emily practically ran the last few steps towards James, enveloping him in a tight hug. James returned the hug. "Hi Emily" He said with a smile.

"Hey James, thanks for agreeing to come. I planned a night out with Zack, but as you saw, he ditched me."

"Oh, I'm sure he must have had a good reason?"

"Knowing him, he's got his eye on someone who he'll be too shy to ask out all night until they eventually catch on and give him their number just because of his big sad eyes."

"Oh. I thought.. isn't he your..."

"Oohhhhh" Emily laughed loudly. "Sorry. No he's definitely not. He's my roommate, and you're more his type than I am" she winked.

"Well he is very handsome" James mused.

"Want me to go get him for you?" She asked with an arched eyebrow before the two of them shared a laugh. The evening went quickly. Emily confided in James that she was under pressure from her publishers to finish her most recent book but she had no idea how to end it. James listened and reassured her. Giving her advice right now would be pointless. She was at least 4 beers in and full of an endless energy.

Nearer the end of the night, Emily had taken to the pinball machine. Her movements were blurred by the alcohol. Looking over her shoulder, she called back. "Hey James, give me a hand"

James positioned himself around her as she studied the movement of the ball. Her fingers linked in with his, making his heart beat harder and harder. As the ball almost fell, Emily managed to hit the button just in time. The jerking motion snapped James out of his slight daze. As she played, Emily seemed to be moving closer, closing the small space between James and her back. As she pressed against him, James let go of her hands. The game ended.

"Is... something wrong?" Emily sounded embarrassed through her slurred words.

"No. Not really, but I don't want to do... that. Not when you've been drinking."

"James, give me some credit. I'm perfec.. perfectly in control." She stammered.

"Even if you were able to speak properly, it wouldn't be fair. For either of us. But I wouldn't mind revisiting this." He said with a laugh. Emily's embarrassed look dissolved in to a warm grin.

James set his bags aside after pulling out the well stored clothes he had brought. He hung them over the roof of the four poster bed before turning on the shower.

He waited in the lobby of the hotel. Having arrived 5 minutes early he sat down on one of the armchairs to wait comfortably. As minutes flew by, James checked his watch. '20 minutes late.' He quickly remembered Emily's earlier nerves and got up to go and make sure she was ok. Upon turning the corner back towards the elevator, James feet stumbled as he suddenly stopped, nearly knocking over Emily. James was speechless as he looked at her.

Emily's was wearing a black dress that hugged her body with the back done up in a corset. Her hair was pulled back and styled in an intricate series of plaits. Her smokey eyeliner matched the dark lipstick she was wearing, making her pale skin more prominent.

James' eyes moved over her body. The dress was classy but not without alure, the hem of the skirt sat around half way up her thighs. Her flat stomach gave way to the curves of her hips and breasts that the black material did little to hide the shape of.

"Emily.. you look..." Words didn't often escape James entirely, but he was at a loss.

"Dammit. Did I overdress?" She asked timidly, rubbing the top of her arm in a nervous way.

"Not at all. You just caught me off guard. You look beautiful Emily." James grinned at her. Emily's confidence was still shaky but she believed that James had meant what he had said.

"You're looking pretty hot too" She mockingly fanned herself with her hand.

"Pretty hot? I suppose I'll take that in stride" he laughed.

The two of them sat at the bar and nursed their drinks, looking over the function room that would tomorrow, be bustling with all manner of writers. A few people were dotted around already. Some were laying out the furniture that the room would be using.

Emily looked around the room, taking in all of the signs and posters that had been put up. She was is awe of the names she recognised, as it dawned in her that she would soon be conversing with them.

As the evening wore on, Emily noticed James' attention falter. "Is everything ok?" She asked with a concerned tone.

"Everything is fine" He said stifling a yawn. "I think the journey here took it out of me."

"I hope you're not staying up on my account" she said sheepishly.

"Not at all. Im staying up because I enjoy your company. That's on me."

"James..." she smiled. "Remember we have all week together." It was music to his ears to hear her say it. James considered that maybe he had gotten ahead of himself. They did have all week and there was no pressure to pursue anything right now.

"Prehaps you're right." He said, somewhat reluctantly. "Besides, we should be on top form tomorrow." He stood up and offered Emily his hand.

"I think I'll drink some water first. If I wake up with a hangover tomorrow, this hotel is going to go very Shining very quickly."

James laughed. "I don't doubt it. If you need me just knock. Im a light sleeper anyway"

"Got it... no overnight guests" she laughed. James wrapped her in a tight hug before bidding her good night.

Emily sat at the bar, waiting for the bartender to step back through the divide that lead to the next function room. Her phone began to ring. Trying her best to shake off the effects of her drink, Emily answered.

"Hello?"

"Emily? Hi, this is Maddison from D&E publishings."

"Hi Maddison, whats up?"

"Oh, not much. I just got back from my vacation to China. Have you ever seen a panda cub? They're amazing! Like little black and white balls of...."

"...."

"You mean, why am I calling don't you?"

"Yeah kind of" Emily laughed

"Sorry. It was a great vacation though" Maddison said nostalgically.

-- "MADDISON!" Another voice called across the phone. "Stop treating our clients calls like they're social engagements. --

The line went quiet for a short while.

"Hello?" Emily asked tentatively.

"Hello. Who is this?" The other voice answered.

"Emily Murphy..."

"Ah yes. Hello Miss Murphy. This is Rebecca Davenport."

"Hi Rebecca. Is everything ok?"

"Everything is fine, we just need your authorisation on the final edits to your book. Annoyingly it's not something that I can get over the phone or by email. I need your signature on the original documents. Can you come in at some point tomorrow to sign?"

"I'm actually out of town at the moment. I've been invited to a convention and..."

"Say no more. Send me the address and I'll mail you the papers."

"Thanks Rebecca, what are your thoughts on the book?"

"I don't really read horror novels."

"Oh.. ok" Emily said, disheartened.

"But if I did, I'd tell you that Devon should end up with Stacy. And that the idea of keeping a crow as a pet is weird."

"So does that mean that you..."

"I'll have them sent out tonight Emily. Have a great week"

"Oh, thanks. You too Rebecca."

"You can just call me Becca" she said, almost flirtatiously before hanging up the call. Emily's attention turned back to the bar where the bartender was waiting with a patient smile. As Emily's eyes landed on him, the quickly swept over his tall body. The dark jeans he wore making the bright white tshirt almost glow as it fit tightly to his abdomen. Emily's eyes were held on the shadows of definition that the muscles underneath were causing. As she met his eyes with her own, she noticed the small tuff of hair that hung down over the olive skin of his face.

"Need another?" He asked. His voice was strong and deep. Looking down at her glass, Emily noticed that she had finished her drink.

"Um.. sure. Why not" she smiled.

"What are you drinking?"

"Whiskey, neat" she said, gesturing toward the bottle of Jameson's just behind the bar. He took the bottle and poured her a generous helping. As she lifted the glass, he leaned back on his hands and let out a long sigh. "Is something the matter?"

"Isn't that what I'm supposed to say? People don't go to bars to listen to the bartenders problems" he grinned at her. His teeth caught Emily's attention. Pure white and perfect. It was a strange thing to focus on, but the smile they produced was blinding.

"If I don't listen to the plight of the bartender, then who will?"

"You must be a saint" he laughed. "Its nothing really. Just a busy night." Emily looked behind her at the nearly empty room before turning back and raising her eyebrows at him. "Oh you don't believe me?" He said, approaching the door to the other function room. He pushed it open slightly and the loud bass of the music almost shook Emily where she sat.

"Wow... so that's..."

"Pretty loud?"

"At least it sounds good" she smiled at him.

"You're a punk music fan?"

"I don't know about that, but I like what I hear."

"Want to join in?" He said, opening the divide of the bar.

"I..." Emily looked around her. With a short sigh, she walked behind the bar where the man stood waiting with a charming grin. "I'd love to."

"By the way... I'm Zig." He said confidently as his hand extended to her.

"Emily." She said, placing her hand in his. Zig raised her hand to his lips, touching them gently to the back of her knuckles.

"Very pleased to meet you Emily."

[omg-imagine]

⊱ Delicate ⊰

Prompt: “Do you even know what you've done to me?”

Fandom: Star Trek (AOS)

Pairing: Jim Kirk x Reader

Words: 2,319

Warnings: Language, mentions of sex

A/N: It’s an angsty one because I love drama. Sorry for any typos, it’s almost midnight while I’m rereading this and probably missed a few errors. Also, I will have a fluffy Jim Kirk story (bc I’m still not over him) up by next friday if I’m able to finish editing this weekend. For the meantime, enjoy!!

“You alright there, kid?” McCoy asked, tearing you away from the thoughts inside your head and bringing you back to reality. “What’s troubling you?”

Shrugging a shoulder, you picked up your PADD and resumed the work you were doing on there. This wasn’t the first time your boss had caught you staring off into the distance and you definitely knew this wasn’t going to be the last.

“It’s nothing,” you said, the lie easily rolling off your tongue. “You put me through back-to-back shifts and it’s wearing me out.”

“You sure? I mean, you’re the one who requested for longer hours but if it’s too much–”

You shook your head and gave him a tight-lipped smile. Ever since you joined the Enterprise, you found yourself being close to Leonard. He was good friend to you and you enjoyed working with the doctor when he’s not being his cantankerous self.

“No, I’m fine. I’ll get use to it,” you simply replied as your attention falls back to your device in hand.

“You’re not picking up more hours because you’re trying to avoid someone on the ship are you?”

You shot your eyes toward Leonard and chuckled nervously. “What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.”

“I don’t know what you’re trying to say.”

Shifting uncomfortably in your seat, you were ready to bolt out of the office at any given moment. You had a feeling this conversation was going to happen sooner than later. Leonard McCoy was not clueless and you would be foolish to think so.

“Jim’s been asking about you.”

The sound of his name brought a sudden dryness to your throat. You haven’t seen the man since you walked out of his quarters in the middle of the night a few weeks ago. “Oh, what about?”

“You know he’s worried about you,” Leonard revealed and you couldn’t bring yourself to believe that statement. “What ever feelings you have for him, he needs to know.”

“I-I don’t understand,” you stammered out. “What feelings? Jim and I are just friends.”

Leonard pursed his lips. “Look, I know about what’s going on between the two of you. Jim might seem fine in the hallways but in actuality, he’s a mess. You have to talk to him.”

“There’s nothing going on between us,” you tried to convince him but it was a lost cause.

“Not anymore as far as I know. (Y/N), please know that I care about you and as much as I hate to admit, I care about Jim too. You two have been off lately and from what I’ve observed, it's affecting the way you work.”

“What do you mean? I've been doing great here. I’m looking after patients left and right, and despite how busy I am, I was able to finish up last week’s paper works early.”

You heard him sigh deeply through his nose. “That's not the point I wanted to make. All I am saying is that you and Jim need to talk this one out. I'm not taking anyone's side but I would very much like my two friends to make up and stop avoiding each other.”

You were speechless, the tears prickling your eyes as you thought of the next words to say.

“I-I have to go. I’ll see tomorrow,” you managed to say before quickly exiting Leonard’s office and walking out of the Medbay.

Your heart pounded hard against your chest and you willed yourself not to cry. All you wanted in the beginning was no-strings-attached sex and it was working out well with Jim. That was until you started developing feelings for the Captain and it seemed to be just one sided.

No one was supposed to know about the relationship. It had been a well-kept secret for nearly six months but it was slowly eating you up. Your feelings went beyond what you had originally anticipated when you began staying the night at Jim’s. You admired his strength and how passionate he was at his job. Despite his flaws, Jim was a good man. He’s smart, funny, sweet, handsome, understanding, charismatic– the list of words to describe him would be endless but to sum it all up, you were in love with him.

And then Jim died. You had never felt so empty when his body was brought into the Medbay and you had never felt so broken during the two long, agonizing weeks after McCoy injected him with Khan’s blood. No one knew for sure if he would wake up and each passing day tore you apart.

Losing him, even for the short time that felt like an eternity, made you realize how strong your feelings were and it scared you. You had never been in love like this before and the fact that Jim sacrificed himself without a second thought made you believe that something like that could happen again.

So you did the best thing you were good at, you ran away.

You ran away from the fact that you had fallen in love with Jim. You ran away from your chance to tell him the truth. You ran away to avoid facing your fears and you didn’t want to stop running. It was all too much for you.

You wanted to forget about him. You wanted to convince yourself that those kisses behind closed doors meant nothing and it was all an illusion. It was a secret affair that you two had and it ran its course. You didn’t really love him and you were just lonely.

What you felt for him was lust. Just pure, all-consuming lust and nothing more.

You repeated those words in your head when you stepped out of the turbolift and they kept replaying on your way back to your cabin. You could hear them clearly as you shut your eyes in bed and they even followed you into your dreams. Those words brought you a restless night because deep down, you knew that they weren’t true.

The Medbay was slow today. You were albeit glad that Leonard hasn’t cornered you into the exam room you were practically hiding in yet so that you two can continue the conversation you stormed out of.

As you sterilized that last of the hypodermic needles, you hear the sound of someone entering the room and then locking the door behind them. “Len, I swear to god if you bring it up one more time–”

You froze when your eyes met the unmistakable blue ones of James Kirk. Suddenly, the air had become thick as Jim slowly approached you with hands behind his back and a slight frown on his face.

“You’ve made yourself hard to find throughout the day, (Y/N),” he began once he got to you.

“I’ve been busy,” you said with such a small voice that you weren’t sure if he had heard you or not. “What are you doing here?”

“I need to talk to you.”

You glanced down to the floor, avoiding Jim’s strong gaze. “I think I made it clear that night that things were done.”

“No, you didn’t,” he responded sternly and it threw you off. “We slept together that night and by morning, you were gone. I deserve a bit of an explanation there because I thought everything was going well between us. Did I do something wrong?”

You held back a response. None of this was his fault. It was merely your actions and your feelings that fucked up the relationship you had with Jim and you were almost sure that things would never be the same.

“It just didn't work out, Jim. I can't do the sleeping around anymore,” you answered as you fumbled with the edge of your blue uniform. “Besides, we are both busy now and it's best if we focus on our jobs.”

Before you could dash out of the room, Jim reached forward and grasped your hand into his. The touch alone was enough to make you stop in the middle of your tracks and tilt your head up to meet Jim in the eye. “I don't believe that's the entire reason why.”

“Jim–” you tried pulling yourself away from him but to no avail. He wasn't letting you off that easy. “Please, I don't want to talk about this right now.”

“Do you even know what you've done to me?” He questioned you and the slight crack in his voice brought tears to your eyes. “The past year has been hell for me with Khan and almost losing everyone on this ship. You're the only one who kept me going and all of a sudden, you just ran away.”

“Don't,” you whispered as Jim inched closer to you. He let go of your hands to hold you by the sides of your face, making it impossible to leave his unwavering stare.

“Whatever it is, I want to fix it. I don’t know exactly how you feel about me, but I’m comfortable enough to say that I love you. I’ve been in love with you for a long time now and I want to have something more than just fooling around.”

He wiped the stray tear that escaped as you spoke. “Jim, I lost you. You were gone and it tore me apart. I love you too, but I can't go through all of that again. I know you would give your life to protect the crew but I don't want to lose you that way.”

“I know and I’m sorry. But you were on the ship and we were going to crash– I had to save you. I had to make sure you were going to make it out alive,” he admitted, and you saw nothing but all honesty in his eyes. “Please, let’s give this a try. We’ll take it as slow as you want. I just want to be able to hold you again.”

It was difficult for you to find your voice as Jim slowly leaned in. You fought the strong urge to close what little distance was left between the two of you. Breathing in his intoxicating scent, you could feel him holding you steady by your waist, the silence in the room becoming too deafening.

“Please,” he repeated, his lips brushing softly against yours and you gently pushed him away.

Jim stumbled as you backed away from him, your chest heaving as your tears blurred your vision. You were crying in front of him and in that moment, all you wanted to do was disappear.

“I’m scared, Jim,” you spluttered through your sobs. “I’ve never felt this way before and I don’t know what to do.”

“It’s okay,” he assured you as he neared you once again. “This is all new to me, too. We can figure this out.”

“What if we can’t? What if something bad happens again?”

“Then we fight through it together.”

Jim silently pleaded and you had to make a decision. You knew that in relationships, you had to take risks and there were certainly a lot more risks to take because of your job in Starfleet. However, you wanted to be brave– you wanted to be brave for Jim. You’ve spent so much of your life running away from your problems that you’ve never had the chance to stand up and fight for what you believed in.

And what you believed in right now was you and Jim.

“Let’s not focus on the ‘what ifs.’ Let’s not think about the bad stuff that may or may not happen and only look forward to the good. We can’t live our lives worrying about things all the time.”

Jim’s hand lifted your chin up, his gaze locked onto you as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “I love you, (Y/N). I know that this started off as a way to blow off some steam but trust me when I say that this has become so much more. I want to hold your hand out in the hallways. I want to be able to walk into the Medbay and see how your day is going. I want to kiss you without having the fear of someone catching us. I don’t want this to be a secret anymore. ”

“I want that, too.” you said truthfully. “I want it more than anything.”

Jim’s lips were dangerously close to yours and you let them be. “Good, because I need this.”

He pressed his lips against yours and you almost immediately kissed him back. Cradling your face with his hands, you wound your arms around his neck as he held you close. He nipped on your bottom lip while you ran the palm of your hand up and down his chest.

Before things got heated, a knock on the door sounded and the two of you pulled away flushed and panting. Once you straightened out your uniforms that were loosen up by wandering hands, you called out for whoever it was to come in.

“Bones,” Jim greeted as the CMO entered the exam room. “How are ya, buddy?”

“I’m just dandy,” Leonard replied. “You two made up?”

You looked over to Jim who simply smiled at you. “Yeah, we’re good now.”

“Great,” your boss said in relief. “I’m happy for you both but I would suggest doing whatever it was you were trying to do some place else. This is my Medbay and I do not condone this type of inappropriate behavior over here.”

“No worries, Bones. We’ll get out of your hair,” Jim chuckled, grasping your hand into his before leading you out of the room.

“Wait, my shift is not over yet,” you pointed out and Jim halted in his walking. “Len’s gonna chew me out if I leave now.”

“So, you would rather spend time with Bones than me?”

Playfully rolling your eyes, you take his hand and pulled him towards the turbolift. “You win this time, Kirk.”

[neisuinene]

In Your Dreams Tonight - Chapter 3 – Fate and Love

Prologue 1  Prologue 2 Prologue 3

  Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 4

“So,” Kiyonori stepped forward, eyeing the four young boys in front of him, “are you boys ready to start?”

Before they could answer, the door slide open, Kan walked in. “Hey Neisui!” then she noticed the presence of other, gave a slight node to Kiyonori, “sorry to interrupt Sensei Taishi, but Neisui, your cousin Koichi is here looking for you.”

Huh? Koichi? What is he doing here? No why does he come here? Did something happen? Neisui dropped her wooden sword onto the ground, and looked passed through Kan. Behind her indeed standing her cousin, who is wearing a business suit, eyes on her.

“Neisui, I’m here to take you home,” he said.

“But I could go home by myself Koichi, don’t need to worry about me. It’s rare you are off so early from work, you should go home and spend more time with Nia.”

“Hmph,” was his reply, “that’s why I’m here. I decide we are going to eat dinner together tonight, all of us. There’s something I would like to say over dinner table, and I wish you to be present.”

Hearing this, Neisui had all her attention on him now. She knew her cousin does not like to talk while eating, since they were young, or at least since she was old enough to remember such details. Sometimes he would give a few sentences but that’s pretty much it, and it’s not done because he wants to enjoy food in silence, but it’s more avoiding the talk. He does not like his life discussed, especially over dining table. So whatever reason made him says this now must be really big, is it about her cousin-in-law Nia? Are they now getting back together?

Neisui gave a nod, “of course, I’m coming.” She grabbed her bag and bowed to Kiyonori, “sorry sensei I afraid I must cut my practice time short, we will continue this next time. I’m sure you would have fun teaching our newest members. Right?” she gave a playful wink as she passed through them and out the door.

“See you tomorrow Kan! Bye Sensei! Bye Toramatsu and everyone!!”

***                                           ***                                                  ***

Half the dinner progressed in almost complete silence, despite the fact that there were few more dishes on the table than usual when Neisui texted Nia about having dinner together and Koichi wants to discuss something over dinner.

Feeling mad, Neisui gave someone a kick underneath the table. When Koichi turned his gaze from the rice in his bowl to look at her, she gave him a meaningful look. Who was the one who said want to talk over dinner? Who was the one actually made the effort of going to school to fetch her so she can be present when he talk?! Neisui wanted to break the silence but tonight it should be focus on them, not her.

Finally, after finishing the eggplants on his plate, he cleared his throat. Neisui was just starting to feeling relieved until she heard him called her name. “So Neisui, who was that boy? Toramatsu? Is he the boy who gave you that scarf?”

Wait, what, why is Koichi suddenly talking about him? Why is he suddenly talking about her? That’s not what’s supposed on today’s topic right? And since they are living together and her cousin did see her wearing that red scarf when she just came back from Kyoto field trip, but how does he know it’s him?

“Koichi, why these questions all of a sudden? And…how do you know all that?”

“I don’t,” he shrugged, then crossed his arms. “You may not have noticed, but I saw how he looks at you, and his gaze followed you out the door. And how you said goodbye to your friend or teacher but then only that boy’s name was out from your lips.”

“…”

“And I saw the name on the scarf, a simple ‘Li’ was woven on it.”

“That still does not explain…”

“Remember the nights when I slept in your room on the floor?” Neisui held her breath, looking at him, waiting for the answer. “You don’t snore, but you do talk in your dreams sometimes. Something about Li Toramatsu, or rather, Li Naomasa.”

Neisui was now speechless, just how much secrets did she already gave away when she sleeping? But still, why talking about her now? Of all dinner talks that could happen? In front of Nia?”

“Sigh, I admit all those…but then I’m still confused. This classmate of mine and that samurai in my dream may very well be connected or maybe even reincarnation, but they are still two separate people. Aren’t they? Do you believe in reincarnation Koichi? Or perhaps in fate? Is it fateful that I have all these dreams of Li Naomasa while meeting this Toramatsu around the same time? Sometimes…at the time we met in Kyoto and today, somehow I feel so familiar with him yet still some distance. I can’t really describe the feeling. But somehow is that familiar feeling, or memory at that time that I accepted the scarf before I could further think to it.”

“Listen Neisui, and Nia,” he finally mentioned the name that was supposed to be brought up long ago. His look suddenly very serious, even his tone is lowered. “Neisui, I’m not sure of fate or reincarnation stuff, but you do feel for them right? They might be different, but to you they are also one. You have always liked fairytales since you were young, or about books that talk of fantasy stuff.  Of all the story books I’ve read you before, there was this line, that I one day suddenly remember about it and went back for a reread.”

“And what is that?” Neisui wondered.

“Lives are hard enough with Gods meddling in it, but they do meddle.” Neisui gave him a complete silence, but she does remember this line. It’s about a God laying a wager with humans, the so-called conditions of game is also betting on human’s hearts. “Things happen, and you may decide how you react, but you can’t decide how you feel. And then, when things piled up of various causes and reasons, humans call it fate. Not because they are already written and decided by Gods, but that’s how our hearts lead to it.”

So her and Toramatsu, should she call it a fate now? But they have only just met and started. So it all now depends on how they, or rather how she reacts to him. She hasn’t given an answer yet.

“And Nia,” Koichi’s voice cut her thought, “do you know why I chose you to be my wife?”

“Because,” Nia finally talked, “because of my abilities, background, and the potential behind that could assist with you for a better career?”

He shook his head, “that might be a reason I be looking for if I were to matchmaking with other women, but with you, he paused,” his eyes all on her, “I thought that with you…I might be able to love you. It had nothing to do with any requisites. I thought that if someone had attracted me that much at that age…maybe I could love her. Maybe I could be attracted to you and not need a reason.”

“Koichi…” Nia whispered his name.

“Though our marriage earlier had not turned out the way I thought it would be, or part of me was still denying myself by having affair with Ai, but since that incident happened and we got more spending time together. You refused my talk of divorce and still took me as I am…at some point, I fell in love with you. Though you have already told me we would work through this together, I want to hear your answer again now, not as a husband who had failed his wife, but as a man who is in love with her.” Koichi suddenly got on his knees, eyes wavering between Nia and the floor.

Nia got up from chair and also knelt on the floor, to the same level as him and hugged him, “of course I do you silly goose. You know how my answer is. Though we may have not married for love, but at that day when we first met before lunch, you knelt down used your handkerchief for my broken heel of shoes so I could walk in comfort, or how you didn’t mind how I was barefoot running on the streets trying not to be late, or how you consoled the little crying boy about his ice-cream, I thought right at that moment I could learn to love you too. I believe we could actually make a happy family , and that belief goes on even now.”

“Nia,” his voice suddenly hoarse, took a small box out of his pocket, it’s a ring, though it’s not a lavish one. He puts it on her, “this ring might be little bit plain comparing to the diamond or those jewel rings, but I have it carved specially for you.”

The ring reads Nia Noa on the top, and inside it reads Nia My Love. This ring has your name on it. You are a designer for architect, and our language is truly beautiful. No is a positive article, and a means love and affection. So this is my love for you. You know I am not a romantic person and this is as romantic as I could get.”

“This is wonderful, Koichi,” Nia now has tears in her eyes, “thank you, thank you for accepting me to be your wife.” She now hugs him.

“Silly,” his fingers gently traces her hair, “I should be the one to say it.”

Neisui, watching the scene in front of her, she is so happy for them. But perhaps they are forgetting they have an audience? She shouldn’t interrupt them. She decided to go back to the room and should start packing and move out soon. She certainly doesn’t want to be a lightbulb now.

(Tagging who I have tagged before, some I forgot for previous chapter. This chapter is mainly based on Koichi from In Your Arms Tonight. And….I have no shame using my twitter name as character @nianoa but it works well? xP)

@akanojikan @asktoramatsu @shirokazekikagami @dreamfar628 @rose-of-yonezawa @thesassyscribbler @aqua-pikachu @my-funandgames @nitroforcepower @rainbowatnight

[starwrite-er]

Poster Boy [Chapter 15] - Poe Dameron x Reader

A/N: wow, it's been a damn long time you guys. Thanks for sticking around, and not, the long awaited next chapter of Poster Boy! also sidenote: it's been a while so idk if u have time but maybe it'd be worth rereading the fic so far bc i know i've forgotten shit and im the damn author yknow

A/N: oh my god im out of practise

Tags: A NUMBER OF THESE WERE NOT WROKING SO THEY HAVE BEEN REMOVED. PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT YOUR URL TO BE UPDATED HERE @plethora-of-things @britishteahater @umbrellabrass @purple-skeleton @winchesterandpie @the-creative-lie @i-alrightokaycool @definitely-nota-fangirl @krakenkitty

 I'd always assumed that, for me, routine would simply always consist of missions and training. It was what it was like for the longest time, yet here I am, the familiarity of such a routine fading oh so fast.

 When I haven't been checking on the construction of the new D'Qar village for the Parmarthens, or ignoring Snap's confidence with our bet, it seems I've been playing a constant game of hide and seek with Keipii. Fortunately enough for me, she's predictable enough for me to expect to find her near Poe at any given time.

 "You'll depart for Coruscant, accompanied by the medic-in-training Niyele, in three days. As usual, the mission specifics have been sent to your datapad. You're dismissed." I am instructed. I make a swift exit, making my way to where Poe has been training some new recruits the past couple of days. I know Keipii has been engrossed in watching the process.

 On my way to the training room, Niyele catches up with me. The primary reason for her coming with me was to get her accustomed to different planets and their cultures, seeing as she had never really left Pamarthe before the battle. Still, even in the short while she'd been at base, she's already showing great potential in her chosen profession, so having her with me in case of the mission going south was reassuring.

 "So, Coruscant, right? Anything I should know?" She questions, walking alongside me.

 "The deeper you go, the worse it gets," I put plainly. "We've staying in the mid-to-top area, in close proximity to where our target is staying. We should be fine, but it's still a rowdy place, and stormtroopers will be on patrol, so don't wander off. You don't have the training that I have."

 "Sounds good to me. We won't be travelling in the X-Wing though, will we?" Niyele asks. It's her first mission, so I suppose her curiosity is unsurprising.

 "Nah, it'd be a dead giveaway to our identity. We'd be dead before we got out of the ship." I tell her. She hums in response, taking a moment to think.

 "A few years ago, if you had told me I'd be going on a recon mission for the Resistance with you, I would have never believed it," Niyele laughs softly. "But here we are."

 "Yeah," I agree. "It's still surreal that you're here, to be honest."

 "Honestly, I'm still shocked that I plucked up the courage to actually do something," She pauses, mulling over her words. "I mean, we've been friends for so long. You were always so committed to the idea you'd join the Resistance and help save the galaxy, while I was committed to, well, just about the opposite of that."

 I laugh. "You were so terrified by just the idea of conflict. You still wanted to help people, though," I smile, thinking back to years past. "You've made the right choice. As a medic, you'll save lives, and in turn help us to save the lives of others across the galaxy." Our walk comes to a temporary stop. "It's nice to have you here. I'm proud of you." I tell her reassuringly.

 "Thanks. It really means a lot," Niyele returns my smile before checking her datapad. "Well, it looks like I've got places to be. I look forward to working with you, Commander."

 I grin back at her, waving goodbye to her as she jogs off down an adjoining corridor. With my close friend off doing other things, I continue my search for Keipii.

 As I continue my stroll down the halls of the base, I hear the laughter of the recruits before I even arrive at the room. I crack open the door, peering in curiously.

 "Well, I was gonna ask if Keipii was with you, but I think I have some different questions to ask now," I say, taking in the sight of a seemingly-flustered Poe Dameron. I raise a brow. "Seriously, what did I miss?"

 "Mom! Yeah, I'm here, is it dinner yet?" Keipii suddenly appears in front of me, speaking quickly, bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet, cheeks red. She seems antsy, as though she'd just made a mistake, and I know it's not because she called me 'mom' - she's been doing that almost since we got back to D'Qar two weeks ago. I regard her with suspicion for a moment, but quickly brush it off.

 "Uh, yeah - hey, is that Poe's jacket?" I realise. The girl glances down at her attire, noticing the extra item of clothing.

 "I was cold and he said I could wear it." Kei defends herself, arms crossed and the sleeves of the much-too-large jacket rolled up to better suit her small stature. I roll my eyes, waving goodbye to the recruits as we take our leave.

 I'm stopped by Poe before I can even make it a few paces away from the door. "Hey! Uh, yeah, hey," It takes him a moment to meet my eye. Weird, he's never like this. "I've got a recon mission tomorrow, and I'm leaving early." He says, quickly snapping back to his usual self.

 "How early is early? And for how long?" I ask him, biting my cheek.

 "A-few-hours-before-dawn early. I won't see you for a couple days." He says. I frown. My mission is in just three days - our missions may overlap.

 "Promise us you'll make it back safe though, okay? I've got a recon mission of my own in three days. I'd rather not come back to find you in the medbay." I reply. He chuckles, agreeing.

 He grins at Keipii, kneeling down to her level. "That jacket looks good on you. Might need to do a bit more growing first, though," He says, to which the young girl smiles bashfully. He presses a kiss to the top of her head as he murmurs a quick goodbye. The small, sweet action triggers a feeling of happiness deep inside me as a smile. He stands, facing me again.

 "I'll see you both soon," He says, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "Okay?"

 The shock from his action renders me speechless as I nod in agreement. "See you soon, Poster Boy." I smile, finding my voice. He disappears back inside the training room, but my feet are rooted to the spot as I process what just happened.

 My face is flushed and my heart is fluttering, and I can't seem to stop the grin that's made it's way onto my face as Keipii drags me to the Dining Hall.

 I try to distract myself from my newly realised fondness by thinking about how Snap is going to react to someone who wasn't even in on the bet winning.

 The following morning, I find myself sitting in the hangar, leaning back against some crates with Keipii beside me as we wait for Poe to show up. Sure, sleep was sacrificed, but isn't it worth it?

 It's BB-8 who notices our presence and alerts us to Poe's arrival. A string of gleeful beeps and whirrs causes the man to spin around, wide-eyed at the sight of Keipii and I. My own droid chirps in conversation  with BB-8 while the little girl, despite her exhaustion, runs and leaps into Poe's arms. I smile at the scene as she happily chatters away to him and he reassures her that he'll quickly return. Keipii slips off the jacket she had taken from him yesterday, returning it for the time being before taking a step back.

 And so comes my turn to say goodbye. I walk into Poe's open arms, no words quite needed as we settle into a warm embrace.

 After a minute, I pull back a bit so to look Poe in the face. "You're the best pilot in the Resistance, so it's not like you need it but," I start, pausing my words to take a moment to kiss his cheek. "Good luck out there, Poster Boy."

 With that, Keipii and I stand to the side, BB-09 at our feet as we watch Poe leave the planet. We watch until we see his distant jump to hyperspace.

 As we return to our room, Keipii yawns before mumbling a confession to me. "I called him dad accidentally yesterday when he was training the recruits."

 I trip over both my words and my feet at this.

[midotakaism]

okay, it took me a while to write everything down, but here are my thoughts and reactions to the last 19 days chapter!! (an alternative title for this could be 'how to make people regret asking about your thoughts')

anyway, it's been pretty hard for me to put some order to my thoughts, because im just!!!!!!! so in love with this chapter!!!!!!!! it’s been a whole day and im still such a mess, there are noises coming out of my mouth but they’re not human, and i can’t find the right words to express how i feel because this update wAS TOO MUCH FOR MY POOR HEART

i think this might be my favorite tianshan chapter, tho it’s a very close tie with chapter 185, and im afraid i've been kinda all over the place, but hopefully it makes sense!! (putting this under a cut because it's really long and there are some pictures)

i already mentioned this here, but let me just say it again because guan shan looks SO GOOD and so comfortable in that tank top, i really love how the black&white combination creates such a nice contrast with his red hair!! and not to look too much into things, but i like how old xian makes sure to give him a spot of yellow/orange in his outfit most of the time (either his shirt, or his bag, or his bracelet [rip, you will always be missed], or in this case his underwear). also for some reason i really like guan shan’s arms?? so this is probably my favourite outfit for him!!

this is me reading too much into stuff as usual, but it’s interesting to me how in these past few chapters guan shan has no problem holding he tian’s gaze when they’re having a sort of confrontation, but the second he says things like ‘go away’ or ‘don’t look for me in the future’, suddenly he can’t look at he tian anymore, as if he wouldn’t be able to tell he tian those things if he looked at him, or as if he is afraid that he tian will realise he is lying and that he actually doesn’t mind having he tian around

VS

IS HE TIAN TRYING TO PUT HIS HAND ON GUAN SHAN’S HEAD OR PINCH HIS HAIR (or something like that) EITHER WAY IM SHOOK (i get overwhelmed by the smallest things, yes)

i have to be honest, im a bit sad we didn’t get to see the family dinner, mostly because i think it would have been a great opportunity to learn more about the characters while also having the chance to add some comedy stuff in the middle of it (plus, i really wanted to see he tian and guan shan’s mom interact), but i really can’t complain about how things turned out because this chapter is just so perfect and beautiful AND THE TWO OF THEM PLAYING BASKETBALL TOGETHER IS LIKE A DREAM COME TRUE SO THANK YOU OLD XIAN

it makes me laugh how he tian is so eager to go play basketball with guan shan that he was about to drag guan shan to the court without having a ball and with guan shan wearing flip flops THAT’S SO ADORABLE AND HE TIAN LOOKED SO HAPPY BOY STOP MAKING ME CRY PLS

also i love how guan shan didn’t want to play at first, but when he decided to do it he took that very seriously, so much so that he clearly must have went back inside to change into sneakers and probably retrieve the damn ball, and then rolled up his pants so they wouldn’t get in the way

IM PRETTY SURE IT WASN’T NECESSARY FOR HE TIAN TO BE SHIRTLESS TO PLAY BASKETBALL THO @ old xian pls give us a break, we just had guan shan being shirtless for three chapter, this can’t be good for our health (jk i love it, even if it’s terribly distracting)

i forgot to mention this, but i LOVE that in this chapter we're starting to see how well he tian is slowly coming to know guan shan, at least on some aspects: back in chapter 155 guan shan told him that he was going to contemplate the idea of doing as he tian said only if he tian rolled down that small slope, and it looks like he tian remembered it and found the right thing to say to make guan shan actually consider to play basketball with him

on that point, it's pretty obvious that in the end he tian offered to do whatever guan shan wanted if guan shan won because he was confident in his own ability to win, and with good reason since it seems like they played more than one round and he tian won them all, but still, i wonder what guan shan would have asked if he had managed to defeat he tian, especially since im sure that in the end he wouldn't have asked he tian to stay away from him (see the second point!!), but probably something a bit more….on the line of rolling down a small slope, apparently!!

i can't believe he tian actually looked guan shan in the eyes and said 'this exaggerated expression isn't bad', jesus christ, like not to be that person but he tian is definitely into dirty talks and describing to his partner how good they look while he fucks them IM SORRY BUT IM JUST STATING FACTS HERE

my reaction upon seeing this panel......

.....literally was to say OH MY GOD out loud and walk away from my computer for a while before coming back and being like SON PUT THAT TONGUE BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM OR SO HELP ME i know you want to taste him so badly BUT PLS CONTAIN YOURSELF

again, not to be that person but he tian has an oral fixation #confirmed 

HE TIAN CALLED GUAN SHAN 'LITTLE MO' AND IT EMOTIONALLY DEVASTATED ME i don't think i will ever get over this, it's just so playful and affectionate aND THIS BOY IS JUST SO IN LOVE I CANNOT DEAL (it also sounds like he tian is acknowledging that guan shan is shorter than him and this messes me up)

it's​ interesting tho that he tian is still not calling guan shan by his name, we are closer to it compared to 'don't close mountain', but he is still using a nickname, so i can't help but wonder when he will say guan shan's name (he did ask 'your name is mo guan shan?' when he first learned it, but you know, it's kinda different than using it in a normal situation)

LISTEN

THEIR FUCKING SIZE DIFFERENCE IM SCREAMING like, i wish i was exaggerating when i say this, but no, i literally buried my face into a pillow and screamed for a while when i first saw this, because i take my size differences very seriously, and tianshan is not particularly prominent, but it's perfect in all the right places, like in the way he tian is slightly taller than guan shan and has broader chest and shoulders, but a smaller waist AND I KNOW IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE BUT THIS MAKES ME EMOTIONAL

i mentioned chapter 155 before, and thinking about it again, the panel where they fall down in this last update reminds me a lot of the one where he tian grabbed guan shan and they rolled down that small slope together back then, except that this time he tian is keeping guan shan close and not letting him go, and it probably wasn't meant to be a parallel, but looking at these two moments you can actually see how much has changed between them in such a short time, and it really leaves me in awe

[takes a deep breath] i know i reached the point where im supposed to talk about the last panel, but like………..HOW!!!!!!! because real talk, i look at that panel and i lose any ability i've ever had to do words, i just IM SPEECHLESS THAT PANEL IS SO BEAUTIFUL I WANT TO HANG IT IN A MUSEUM THAT'S WHERE IT BELONGS!!!!!!!! seriously, i am so in love with it, i love their position, i love the way he tian is burying​ his face into guan shan's shoulder/chest, i love guan shan's expression, i love how their hands are placed, i love he tian's balled fists as if he's trying to keep himself from touching guan shan, from hugging him, i love how he tian is asking to stay like that just for a moment, I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT!!!!!!! 

i actually wish it didn't mess me up so badly, because there are so many things to talk about, but i can't put down the right words. there's such an incredible softness and vulnerability in he tian in those last few panels that ends up permeating the entire chapter, and it's so touching and heartbreaking at the same time to see he tian asking for that moment of closeness, of comfort, to realize just how much he wants to close that gap that divides them and how deeply he feels for guan shan. i also find beautiful and very significant that guan shan allows him to have that, because to me it just confirms that he is slowly figuring out that he tian is sincere in his intentions, that he doesn't have an ulterior motive, maybe even that he tian has feelings for him, and the way he reacts to this side of he tian, to these emotions, is very different from the way he normally does, which just shows how he is slowly starting to fall for he tian too

(i wasn't sure about adding these last two things, but oh well, in for a penny.......)

this is just a personal feeling i had, but in the light of this update i went back to reread the past three chapters and……..there's been a sort of…….desperation in he tian's actions throughout these chapters, like……showing up at guan shan's house uninvited, giving him the earring, asking guan shan on a date (more or less), lingering a bit more by playing basketball with him, burying his face into guan shan's shoulder and staying close to him.........and i mean, he is in love with guan shan and wants to be with him, but-- idk how to explain it, it feels like he tian has been trying to buy himself as much time as he can, committing guan shan to his memory and giving guan shan something to remember him by……..and before someone says anything, no, im NOT saying that something terrible is going to happen and that they're going to be separated, i just find it interesting that all this happened after jian yi was kidnapped and he tian saw how devastated zheng xi was. again, im not saying he tian is going to leave, or that he wouldn't normally do those sort of things with guan shan, because he would, but maybe what happened to jian yi made him look at guan shan and  think something like 'what if he disappeared? what if i left now taking for granted i will see him tomorrow and ended up not seeing him ever again? would i remember him ten years from now? would he remember me?', and he just needs a moment to reassure himself that guan shan is warm and solid and real and that he's​ not going anywhere

listen i suck at predicting what old xian will do next, i just accepted the idea that i will always be wrong (tho that doesn't stop me from theorizing), but i would honestly pay old xian to continue this moment and not to drop it like they usually do, but even more i would pay FOR IT TO BE A PARALLEL TO ZHENG XI AND JIAN YI IN CHAPTER 164 with he tian asking guan shan if he really finds him disgusting because i need some sort of talk between them and that would be amazing (just give me a different ending and no assault pls;;;;;;;;)

ANYWAY HE TIAN IS IN LOVE WITH GUAN SHAN OKAY BYE

[lumiolivier]

Chapter Fifteen:  Yes, Mistress

Word Count:  3735

Chapter No. 15/36

Notes:  This chapter is so cute.  It makes me turn to mush every time I reread it.  Enjoy!

Chapter Fourteen:  Follow the Post-Its

Soft, glowing candlelight and scattered rose petals led me to the park gazebo where a bottle of cabernet and a set of glasses waited for me.  As beautiful as this was, I was the only one here.  No note.  No stalker. Not quite sure how to feel about this, but it’s an unopened bottle of wine and sweet serenity.  I’m not complaining.

 However, the rustling in the woods came off a tad unsettling.  And if I didn’t know any better, I’d think I heard a camera shutter. I didn’t read too terribly much into it. Instead, I did what I always did when I had no clue what the hell was going on.  I looked up and got completely lost in the night sky.  The stars seemed a bit more dazzling tonight than usual. Might as well crack open this wine.

 “Please, allow me, my lady,” a warm, English accent sent chills down my spine, taking the bottle away from me.

 “Are…” I had been rendered speechless, “Are you my stalker?”

 “Stalker?” he scoffed, “Heavens, no.  You know exactly who I am.  If I may call you by your first name?”

 “I don’t understand why you haven’t,” I couldn’t move.  I wanted to turn around and see the face that matched that voice.

 “You needn’t be nervous around me, Mimi,” he tried to comfort me, “You know who I am.  You just need to think.”

 “I know Sebastian isn’t real,” I rolled my eyes, “I’m almost insulted.”

 “Not my intentions,” he assured, “But you’re right.”

 “You don’t sound like J. Michael Tatum,” I thought out loud, “Nor do you sound like Daisuke Ono.”

 “You’ve heard my voice before,” he promised, “In fact, you heard it earlier today.  About four and a half hours ago.  Perhaps if I were to go from an English accent to an American one, you’d know exactly who I am.”

 “Hold on,” I thought a little harder, instantly settling down, “Julian?”

 “Who else would bring you out here?” he dropped the accent and wrapped his arms around the top of my shoulders.

 “I thought it was a fan gone nuts,” I admitted, “But you did say keep Saturday open.”

 “I promise I won’t kill you,” Julian swore, “But I have been busy.”

 “I see that,” I noticed the roses on the other side of the bucket and the rich, blue ribbon wrapped around the gazebo pillars.

 “You haven’t even seen the best part,” he spun me around.  I…I didn’t know what to say.  What stood in front of me…was absolutely flawless.

 “Oh my God.”

 “Well?” Julian asked, “Good enough?”

 He cosplayed Sebastian for me.  Down to the last detail, Julian had become Sebastian Michaelis.  My body pillow took human form.  And I was either about to cry or have a nosebleed.  Not quite sure if it’d be metaphorical or not. Hopefully not.  This dress was a pain in the ass to make.

 “Julian,” I put my hand to his cheek, still not completely sold this wasn’t Sebastian, “You’re perfect.”

 There it was again! That snap from the woods! Immediately, my head jerked toward it, snapping me out of my headspace.  But of course, because Julian was Julian, he knew exactly what to say when I needed to hear it.  He sat me down in the gazebo, “Sorry.  I should’ve told you.  I had a friend of mine snapping pictures.  I couldn’t let this go undocumented.”

 “Hello!” some guy waved from the woods.

 “Hi,” I started settling down.  And once the gravity of the situation began to set in, I swallowed the growing lump in my throat, “Julian, I need some answers like yesterday.”

 “You want to know why I put you through the rigmarole,” he assumed, “And all the bullshit of following post-it notes all over your house for us to end up here.”

 “Yeah,” I nodded, taking a heavy drink from my wine glass.

 “First of all,” Julian took my hand, “You really do make a cute, crossdressing Ciel.  I thought I was going to shit myself when I saw you as Miku, but this fits you a lot better.”

 “Thank you,” I blushed.

 “Perfect,” he smiled, “Paul? You get that?”

 “We’re golden!” his friend popped up from behind him.

 “Good,” Julian continued, “Now, back to us.  When I moved to Lenexa, I was going to become a hermit, give up cosplaying, and fall off the face of the internet.  A total ghost story.  Instead, I find a little girl at the café that had a spark about her.  She was the best kind of weird.  She quoted Death Note within our first forty-eight hours and had yaoi dreams about the Iwatobi Swim Club.  She spooned a body pillow of this devilishly attractive butler every night. She knew the ins and outs of Fullmetal Alchemist like the back of her hand and could argue why RoyEd is an abomination until she was blue in the face.  That’s when I knew.  If I were stupid enough to let something like you slip through my fingers, I…I don’t know. I’d deserve to get the shit beat out of me with one of Winry’s wrenches.”

 “You, too?” I gasped, understanding exactly what he was trying to say.

 “Me, too?” he gave me a look, “You, too?”

 “Are we on the same wavelength here?” I wondered, starting to confuse myself.

 “I think so,” Julian pulled me against his chest, giving me the deepest, most passionate kiss I’ve ever had in my life.  And I never wanted it to end, “Was it something kind of like that?”

 “Sort of,” I nuzzled my face in his shoulder.

 “I love you, Mimi,” he held me closer.

 “I love you, too,” I hid a smile, “Julian, I’ve been wanting to tell you that for the past couple days, but had no idea how.”

 “Try the past week.”

 “Touché,” I nodded, “But you mean it, right?  You actually do…You know…”

 “Of course I do,” Julian giggled, “If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have gone through all this.  You told me you had high standards.  If I wasn’t a demon butler, half made of metal, a colonel turned Fuhrer, a host, or beautifully cut and fast in the water, I’d have no shot.  So, I thought this would’ve been a good way to get your attention.  And I’m sure it made for some excellent pictures, too.”

 “Julian,” I curled into his chest, “You did Sebaciel for me.”

 “You did Miku for me,” he pointed out, “And tomorrow, you’ll be Misa, too.”

 “The things we do for love, right?” I shrugged.

 “That’s right,” Julian kissed the top of my head, “Wine?”

 “God, yes,” I begged, “My feet are killing me and I’m exhausted.  After you left, I forgot how much it sucked being up front alone.  And we were packed.”

 “I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he apologized, “But I’m sure this was worth it, right?”

 “Oh, yeah,” I nodded, “Definitely.  Was it worth the gonorrhea?”

 “Always,” he laughed, “You are worth the gonorrhea.”

 “What the hell are you two talking about?” his friend thought we were on drugs.

 “Inside joke,” Julian explained, “I told the boss I had a doctor’s appointment to get out of work, so I could set this up.  By the way, Mimi, this is my friend Paul.  He’s my photo bitch.  Any time I need cosplay prints, he’s my guy.”

 “Excuse me?” Paul shot him a glare, “I’m not your photo bitch.  Who takes a ten percent commission on all of your pictures?”

 “You.”

 “And who came all the way from Kansas City to do this for you?”

 “You.”

 “Hi,” Paul smiled at me, “I’m Paul.  I’m Julian’s photographer, not photo bitch.  You’re too good for him.  Run far and run fast.”

 “Mimi,” I introduced myself, “And I love Julian to pieces.  I’m not leaving him.  It’s almost like…I sold my soul to him already.”

 “You didn’t…” Julian beamed, “Did you put the contacts in, too?”

 I untied my eyepatch covering my right eye, revealing the little purple pentagram beneath it, “Of course I did.  Like I could cosplay Ciel without the contract.”

 “Mother of God, I love you,” Julian held me tighter than the corset did, “If I wasn’t currently working through some commitment issues, I’d marry you.”

 “It’s a bit soon for that,” I settled him, “I mean, we just started dating.”

 “I like hearing you say that,” he admitted, “It sounds so sweet and lyrical.”

 “You don’t need to suck up to me, sweetie,” I assured.

 “I wasn’t sucking up,” he promised, “Although, rumor has it your parents are out of town, right?”

 “Yeah,” I nodded, “How did you know that?”

 “How do you think I got into your house?” he scoffed, “Your mom let me in.  Your parents were right behind me when I left.  Although, they were awfully curious as to why I had one of your dresses.”

 “What did you tell them?”

 “I needed it for a project,” he kept cryptic, “Good enough for them.”

 “Good,” I sighed out, already finishing my second glass.

 “So,” Julian brought it back, “Paul, you want to crash at my place tonight since you’re taking our Death Note pictures tomorrow anyway?”

 “Sure,” Paul agreed, “Sounds good to me.”

 “And you, young lady,” Julian forced my gaze, “Maybe you shouldn’t be home by yourself.”

 “Are you proposing a sleepover already?” I assumed.

 “I might be.”

 “In that case,” I gave him one more kiss, “I don’t see why not.  My bed’s a tight fit, though.”

 “There’s always your parents’ bed,” he pointed out.

 “That’s a California king, too,” I smiled, “Alright.  You can stay tonight.”

 “And maybe tomorrow?”

 “We’ll see,” I filled glass number three.

 “As much of a blast third wheeling is,” Paul joked, “Julian, give me your house keys.”

 “Yeah,” Julian pulled out his key ring from his coat pocket, “You did lock my house up when you left, right?”

 “Yeah,” I took another heavy drink.

 “Don’t rifle through my shit,” Julian put his house key in Paul’s hand, “And don’t suck down all my booze.”

 “I’ll just eat you out of house and home instead,” Paul promised, “See you tomorrow, guys.  It was nice meeting you, Mimi.”

 “Bye, Paul!” I waved him off, “He seems like good people.”

 “He is good people,” Julian squeaked, “Paul’s the best kind of people.  And he’s a damn fine photographer.  His pictures are amazing.  I met Paul in Kansas City a few years ago and he’s been doing all my pictures since.”

 “Do you have any of your prints?” I wondered, “Or do I have to scour the internet?”

  “I have some,” he promised, “I’ll show you my portfolio.  What about you?  You don’t have anything weird I’d find on the internet, do you?”

 “Other than my fan fiction?” I thought it over, “No.  And I already gave you my link.  But just a forewarning, it can get kind of gross.”

 “I’m not surprised,” Julian pulled me onto my feet, “You’re a little fujoshi that’s probably got a dark side.  If you were bendy in your dream, does that mean you’re bendy for real?”

 “What do you think?” I rolled my eyes.

 “I think there’s something you’re not telling me,” he teased, holding me close, “Were you a camgirl?”

“No!” I squealed, “No!  No!  No!  I was not a camgirl!  I was not whoring myself out on the internet.  No!  If I’m going to be doing livestreams, they’re going to be gaming related.  No!  I am not, nor have I ever been a cam girl.”

 “I don’t know,” Julian shrugged, “They knock down some decent money.  Spend a summer as a camgirl and you’re paying your way through college.”

 “I’m not becoming a camgirl,” I put my foot down, “That’s not going to happen.  I don’t care how much money they make.  It’s degrading.”

 “Only if you don’t like it,” he took my hand and we started heading back toward his car, “If you do, it’s just having fun on the internet.  Nothing degrading about it.  And I just thought since you were cute and you’re a cosplayer…”

“I’m not doing it, Julian,” I growled, “Get the idea out of your head right now.”

 “But what if…”

 “No!”

 “Alright,” he dropped it, “Fine.  You’re not going to be a camgirl.  But the more you’re willing to do on camera, the more money you make.”

 “That’s practically prostitution,” I snapped, “I’m not doing it.  Anymore mention of it and I’m going to punch you in the nuts.”

 “You know,” Julian smiled, “That’s a weird fetish, too.”

 “Julian!” Once I settled down, I had an idea.  A way to turn this around, “Don’t make me order you…”

 “Please,” he begged, “Order me, Mistress.”

 “You’re such a dork,” I rolled my eyes.

 “You know,” Julian went back to his normal self, getting the car door for me, “I don’t know what to do with myself.  I get to spoon more than Miku tonight.”

 “It’s weird, though,” I rested my head on his shoulder, “I still get to snuggle Sebastian.”

 “And I get to snuggle a crossdressing thirteen-year-old boy,” he cringed, “Ok, that didn’t even sound better in my head.  I feel dirty.”

 “You should,” I laughed, “But if it’s any consolation, that thirteen-year-old boy you’ll be cuddling tonight is actually a twenty-two year old girl that’s completely legal and won’t get you jail time.”

 “That’s comforting.”

 Julian and I went back to my house, ready to call it a night.  He untied my corset for me like a sweetheart and I thumbed through my closet. For the sake of wanting to be adorable, I had a onesie for this very occasion.  And in an instant, I went from Ciel Phantomhive to Honey-senpai’s bunny Usa-chan.

 I went back into the living room where Julian was unfortunately no longer Sebastian.  But I could accept that.  We had all intentions of putting a movie on and clocking out, but instead, I had something else in mind.  Something almost better than that.  Usually, my pre-bed movie of choice was Howl’s Moving Castle, so Joe Hisaishi’s beautiful music could soothe me to sleep, but I had a Blu-Ray come in a couple weeks ago and I couldn’t say no.

 “Excuse me,” Julian pulled me down to the couch, “Could you not be adorable for five minutes?”

 “That’s not happening,” I cuddled into him, “At least I don’t have the hood up.”

 “Are you…” he put my hood up for me, “Are you fucking Usa-chan?”

“Maybe,” I grabbed the remote off the coffee table, “You did say you were on episode three, right?”

 “Did you grab Dramatical Murder?” he guessed as GOATBED played in the menu.

 “I did,” I pushed play, “Something kind of monumental happens this episode and I will be squealing, so promise me you won’t make fun of me.”

 “I promise,” Julian pulled my hood down, kissing my forehead, “I can’t believe we’re doing this.”

 “I can,” I argued, “It was one of those only a matter of time things.  We’re very Edwin like that.”

 “That we are,” he agreed, “Now, I love you, Mimi, but shut up.  I want to see what’s going on.  My Japanese isn’t good enough to watch this without subtitles.”

 “Alright,” I stopped, “Go ahead.”

 And now, we wait.  I watched Julian’s face as the episode progressed.  And only a few minutes in, I couldn’t help myself.  Noiz had walked into the shop Aoba worked at and I waited.  Whenever they’d get just a little close, I’d jump a little, anticipating the ending.  That was until Noiz had broken into Aoba’s house and had him pinned against the wall.

 “What the hell?” Julian freaked, “Why doesn’t Aoba turn around and deck him?”

 “You’ll see,” I settled him.

 “And why would Noiz want to destroy Ren?!” he whined, “Ren’s adorable and fluffy!  Why?”

 “Julian,” I sat in his lap, “Relax.  You’ll find out eventually.  Just shut up and watch.”

 “How is this guy your main?” Julian asked, “He’s a dick with a massive chip on his shoulder.”

 “Again,” I repeated myself, “You’ll see.”

 “I don’t know, Mimi,” Julian fed me Pocky, “I can’t find myself liking this guy.”

 “You’ll learn to love Noiz,” I promised, “Now, shut up!  It’s about to get to the good part.”

 “That’s sweet, I guess,” he awed as Noiz kissed the back of Mio’s, one of the little kids that frequent the shop to pester Aoba, hand, telling her that rowdy little girls weren’t cute.  Personally, I found this a travesty because Mio was the cutest little thing.  And she’s got two brothers.  She’s not going to not be a little rowdy.  Julian let out a little giggle, “Sexual harassing pierced guy? Really?  That’s the best they could’ve come up with?”

 “Just wait for it,” I beamed, my eyes glued to the screen.

 “And why would a simple, sweet gesture get her so flustered?” Julian asked, “It’s not like he was asking her back to his place for cocktails.”

 “Wait for it…”

 “Exactly,” Julian agreed with him, “It was just a little kiss.  It didn’t mean anything.”

 “AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I squealed, watching the only true yaoi moment in the whole anime. Noiz and Aoba’s kiss.  I wondered if Noiz used tongue.  And if Aoba could feel his tongue rings.  And if I could get that on a loop, “THERE IT IS!  THERE IT IS!  THERE IT IS!  YES! YES!  AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!”

 “Jesus, Mimi,” Julian tried to settle me down, “Now, I understand the warning.”

 “THEY’RE SO PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER!” I continued my spazzing, “THEY NEED TO BE TOGETHER!”

 “Mimi,” he took a page out of Noiz’s book, kissing me with the same passion, “Relax.  I get it.  But take it down a notch.”

 “Sorry,” I apologized, “I get a little excited when I see my ships sail.  And that was the exact moment I started shipping Noiz and Aoba. When I played the game, I played Noiz’s route first.  And when that moment popped up, I practically cried.”

 “Really?” Julian worried, “I thought you were shipping Noiz and Koujaku.”

 “Oh, I do,” I assured, “Don’t get me wrong.  But there’s something special about Noiz and Aoba, too.  And Aoba and Koujaku.  I could see Aoba and Koujaku having the most adorable domestic life.”

 “Do tell,” he got up to go to the kitchen and crack another bottle of wine.

 “I could see Aoba and Koujaku moving in together,” I painted the picture, “Somewhere in the Old Residential District.  Aoba’s heart is there.  Koujaku wouldn’t want to take him away from that.  They’d get married, adopt a couple babies.  Maybe a pair of twins.  You’ll find out what that means later.  But when the babies start crawling, they’d terrorize the hell out of Ren and Beni. When they got older, Aoba would do carpools and bake sales while Koujaku would come home from work, ready to spend some time with his family.  It’d just be the most precious domestic life and I want them to be happy.”

 “What about Aoba and Noiz?” Julian wondered, “What if they were to be together forever?”

 “They’d travel the world together,” I smiled, “A little bit of a spoiler.  More for the game than the anime, but Noiz isn’t from Midorijima. Noiz is from Germany.  He’s occasionally his little brother’s personal assistant, so that’s got him going back and forth from Japan to Germany all the time.  One day, Noiz would come back to Midorijima and beg for Aoba to move to Germany with him. That’s more game canon.”

 “So, what would make them world travelers?” he sat back down, giving me another glass of cabernet.

 “I’m sure Noiz would have to go all over the place for his brother,” I assumed, “There’s no way he’d leave his boyfriend behind.  They would never want to be separated from each other.”

 “Wow,” Julian stole another kiss from me, “You paint such beautiful pictures, Mimi.”

 “Some of that,” I admitted, “is fan fiction canon, too.”

 “Still came from your imagination, didn’t it?” he pushed my hair out of my face, “I wonder what it’s like to crawl around in your brain.  Through your imagination.  Through your memories.  Through every little thought you have.”

 “You’re getting ahead of the storyline, Julian,” I scolded, thinking about how Aoba has the power to do exactly that.

 “What?”

 “You’ll see,” I turned on another episode.  

 “So, I have a question,” he wondered, “Do we ever see Aoba and any of the characters doing anything objectionable?”

 “In the game, yes,” I nodded, “In the anime, no.  That was kind of disappointing.  On its own, the series isn’t half bad.  I hope a season two comes out with all the fun shit from Reconnect.  Then, you’d get to meet Noiz’s little brother and find out a little more about Aoba’s backstory and it’s just…There’s too much in Reconnect to NOT make a season two.  If you can’t handle much for yaoi, just watch the anime, but there’s a lot of incredible story in the game, too.  Like I said, for it being a yaoi game, it’s a very well written and very deep story.  It’s not just two dudes fucking anywhere they can. And one dude fucking a robot.  And a dog.”

 “No…” Julian cringed, “Not Ren…He’s too pure and too precious for this world.  Tell me this doesn’t go into bestiality.”

 “It doesn’t,” I clarified, “But the dog…The dog is hot.  Ren is a hot dog.  His online mode is gorgeous and I would fuck the dog.  I know it sounds disgusting, but you’ll understand as we go through the series.”

 “It’s no wonder why people think otakus are a little fucked up,” he giggled, pulling me closer to him, “So, I believe I was promised another episode.”

“Yay!” I squeaked, curling into his chest and putting the next episode on.

 Never did I ever think I’d be doing this.  A Saturday night in a kigurumi with my equally as much otaku as me boyfriend, watching one of my favorite anime.  All while in the morning, he and I would be doing a cosplay shoot.  Even though we had done one tonight.  This feeling was so strange.  I had never had it before.  With my ex, I was always walking on eggshells, trying to hide who I was from him.  It was kind of nice to have someone like me for a change.  Someone I don’t have to hide from.