#hugged. held. grazed hands. been touched at all. i'm having a crisis right now. idk. 20 years? I'm not even kidding 😭

[krikeymate]

Howdy, it's me from the Spanish-speaking Carpenter ask! I had another idea that you might've touched on, but I decided to expand a bit.

So touch starvation can make you sick. Like, for real. Because, scientifically, not having skin to skin contact with another human being for a long period of time can cause a lowered immune system and negative emotions. I don't know why exactly, but that's what a lot of articles online say lol

Bringing touch starvation to the Scream franchise: Tara Carpenter is touch starved.

Being born as a small child with asthma... then everyone leaves and there's no affection left for Tara... Tara hides her negative for a long time, and that's another reason why she's so angry all the time.

Imagine being coddled by your sister for YEARS until suddenly, you're 8 years old and your dad left, mom became neglectful, and the BEST sister in the world suddenly flipped a switch and started to ignore you. You would hold out hope for years for your sister to return to you, begging her to explain why, only for her to drop out of your life.

Sure, Tara still has her mom - but does she really? The last time Tara tried to even talk to the woman, the only skin contact she received was a single slap to the face for showing disrespect.

Tara still has her friends. Sure, they're a couple months/a year younger than her (cmon Scream, what's with the timeline issues), but they all still embrace her. Not really.

Tara craves the love and affection, and she'll soak it up every once in a while from her friends, especially Amber, but it isn't what she wants. She wants Sam. She wants to hug her sister.

Due to her inability to truly accept her friends' hugs, Tara knows she's going to be their downfall. The last person she willingly touched was Sam, and then Sam left. Tara tainted their relationship, she should never have contact with another person again.

And when Sam comes back, Tara is still wary. She only touches Sam when necessary, but she doesn't once push Sam away when Sam affectionately brushes her hair back to kiss her forehead or when Sam climbs into bed behind her when Tara's having a fitful fever nightmare.

Sam's touch is a gift. Tara's touch is a curse.

She wants to break down and fall apart for Sam to pick up and messily glue together, but she also wants Sam to stop touching her and let her have her space, she doesn't need Sam like Sam needs her (she lied), she's so cold all the time but she doesn't know how to reach out.

She doesn't even know if she deserves to defrost from the chilly storm she herself created.

Me thinking about the last time I was hugged: 😟

Yeah, I've talked about touch-starved Tara before. Because of course the girl is touch-starved! She was born untouchable, isolated. Her parents never cared much for her. Her father wasn't interested in dealing with a baby. Her mother... well, her mother. There was just Sam, and Sam was there to give her everything she could possibly need.

Until the moment she wasn't. Until she began to draw away. Until the touches became far and frequent, and then she wasn't there at all.

The less Sam wanted to touch her, the less Tara wanted to touch others. She didn't want to hug her friends anymore, she didn't want to hold their hands or jump on their backs. She just wanted to be left alone. She just wanted her sister.

Amber's the first person to touch her in years. She didn't know Tara doesn't like to be touched, at first. Then she just didn't care. She ignored when Tara would pull away. It hurt, but it was nice. She never told her to stop.

Then she learns Amber's touch is only there to hurt. Maybe that's all she deserves, the hurt and the pain.

It hurts when Sam touches her. She keeps waiting for violent hands, like Amber, like her mother. It never comes. She's so gentle, she can barely stand it. She keeps waiting for it to be ripped away again. That would hurt more, she thinks. She doesn't want to get used to this all over again only to lose it.

They move to New York and this is it, Tara thinks. The perfect place for Sam to run away to disappear and never return. She never does. Tara prepares herself for the moment. She pulls away, she distances herself, she stays away.

It only makes Sam more desperate to hold on. Tara's suffocating in her arms. She needs it, she hates it, she wants it, she can't breathe.