#how you gonna stress me out while i'm studying for boards i can't

[izvmimi]

I think you're cool ❄️

Also I never did give you an answer to that boards question did I pls don't block me <3

.

[a-d-nox]

Hello, nox! How are you? I hope you’re well and enjoying your new deck 🎉.

I’d like to participate in your latest game “tick tock goes the clock” if it’s possible.

My initials: EO

My reading choice: 🍾 POP 🍾

My goal for the next year is to graduate and secure an internship abroad. By the way, what is your goal for the next year?

Thank you for your time and energy! Have a good day/night!

clocking no. 20

hi! i am doing alright i am getting ready to go to to my grandparents house to spend thanksgiving with them (never know when its the last might as well be with them while they are here - happy thanksgiving if you observe it)! thats a great goal too - i hope you find a good internship. keep on studying - you are in the final stretch the last semester goes fast!!

last year i made a bingo board - i think i will do that forever now it was so helpful and super motivating to me. here are some of my goals that i have in mind rn: start using a hair mask once a week, moisturizer everyday (i'm getting old and have to start taking better care of my skin), no more phone before bed, start stretching or doing yoga before bed (i'm again getting old), go for mini morning walks for 10mins (totally doable and good for my circulation), look into buying land, open a roth ira, look into brokerages, scrub myself from the internet (i think i am gonna get off a lot of social media - i don't like x or instagram anymore), read 25 books, volunteer quarterly, no more soda, take a month off from social media, have a no buy month, go 24hrs phone free, etc.

now on to your reading...

start of 2025 -> 0.5 - i feel like tensions are going to be high for you going into 2025. things are going to seem complicated... it might feel like you can't process everything thats happening. it might also be like a seasonal affective disorder type deal. leave some grace and patience for yourself.

end of 2024 -> 2.1 - you seem pretty balanced and content right now. are you talking to someone right now? are you bonding with someone?? life seems pretty perfect feeling for you. you have like an internal peace. you are blossoming in "winter".

what's changing for you in 2025 -> 8.1 - you are definitely going to find some opportunities to get out into the world. adventure is going to find you! you will be guided during this time as you journey around the "outside world".

the work you will have to do -> 5.1 - i think you have to work on how you manage your stress. you are bound to be under some pressure this coming year. learn to release your stress in a healthy way and maybe how to go with the flow better.

end result of 2024 at this moment -> 6.1 - you have been tending to your life and self and you are starting to see positive growth! keep it up! keep taking care of your heart. maybe find a volenteer opportunity before the year ends to spread the love and positive karma. give without expectation of receiving in return.

-a.d.

[shiningneedlecastle]

You uhh... you wanna talk about the med school residency, bud?

oh lol i didn't think i was gonna get an ask about it, thanks for asking. i'm actually not quite in residency yet, just med school. 2nd year

just so happens to be the part of med school where you study for this fuckmassive 8 hour exam named USMLE step 1 that covers every part of the curriculum (and also a bunch of outside shit since too many students passing = less money the host company gets to charge us to retake the exam). for perspective, the summary book for it named first aid is ~750 pages long and everything in there is fair game.

people regularly study for this exam with a schedule of ~10 hours a day for 6 weeks straight no breaks. that's what I'm doing now but i wanted to be careful so i planned mine to be 9 weeks. that's bc my med school itself didn't prepare us well for that despite us paying 60k+ tuition a year. a real shit tier lectures and wasted money type of thing. people also regularly experience both physical and mental health problems from studying for the exam to the point it's just expected

i've heard things from current M3s (3rd year med school students) about 24 hour straight shifts while having to study for board exams at the same time. also stuff about residents often having 80 hour work weeks, sometimes without one/both weekend days off. the work itself is naturally strenuous since it's doctor stuff. the sort of situation that gets overworked residents into car crashes from falling asleep at the wheel due to how exhausted they are. fun little article about that phenomenon here. notice that first line "Resident physicians often work longer than 24 consecutive hours with little or no sleep." btw residents get paid ~$20 an hour on average

currently wondering what to do with the fact the next couple years for me are gonna be the (probably? hopefully it won't get worse later?) shittiest time of my life. i can't really get out of that without wasting the preparation i did specifically for this, aka SHITLOAD of grinding i've been doing since start of university so close to a decade now. i realize at this point that this field might not be for me but the concept of exiting now and losing so many years of my life to stress and endless studying for nothing in return + a fuckload of debt makes me pretty unhappy

this probably sounds whiny or something but i'm in not a great spot mentally tbh.

[tittyinfinity]

My mom asked me how I was so comfortable letting my son stay home for self-care days and not forcing him to go to school when he doesn't feel good (but doesn't have a fever)

It's because I was the perfect student and I STILL crashed and burned.

It's probably why I crashed so hard!!

I was a straight A, Honors, 4.5 GPA student in every extra curricular activity I could be in. Some of that while working full time! It literally nearly killed me!

I worked my ASS off studying every single day and where the fuck did that get me?

All it did was make me a stressed out, depressed child. & now I sit here as an adult, disabled and unemployed, with all that work for nothing.

Since I'm on disability and can stay home with him, I'm gonna take that opportunity to stay home with him when he needs it

My son is autistic with adhd. I care about his happiness more than I care about how the school is going to grade him (on the same scale as his non-autistic, non-adhd peers).

And the fact that my son comes home every single day saying "school is torture" isn't fucking okay.

Yes, we've set up disability plans for him, he does have equipment that helps him – he gets bigger pencils, has a computer that magnifies the white board, is allowed naps, and has a lot of resources. And I'm glad! But it doesn't stop him from being overstimulated.

They say he has a hard time getting work done at school, but when we're at home, he LOVES practicing math and reading with me. I've explained that you just have to make it fun for him and he likes it! He needs more personal one-on-one time! My kid can do 5th grade level math and reading dude, he's not behind his classmates at all.

Not to mention that I JUST found out that some kids haven't been very nice to him at school and they're not doing anything about it.

So yeah, I don't give a fuck about your "attendance goals" I care about our "being haply and not fucking depressed" goals. Fuck you I love my kid more than I care about that fact you can't run your schools in any other way than to get them ready to slave away to capitalism.

[a-spell-a-rebel-yell]

d+1 national board exam day review

hello everyone, hope everyone's feeling fine today!

it's been a month since my last post and i would like to report that i'm done with the national board exam(s)! announcement day is on December 16th, hurrah!

i can't believe i actually did it??? despite the obstacles and dramas i have to go through, i survived??? now that i have nothing to do, to kill time i'm here to tell the tale!

so, will you guys believe me that i fell sick right after i published my last post? like, literally in the morning after, my body temperature spiked up. at first i thought it's just a light fever that will end in two or three days, so i took some paracetamol tablets and didn't pay much attention to the symptoms.

the fever did go down in a day, but guess what? the fever came back. this time, even higher followed with nausea, head pain, loss of appetite, and almost debilitating fatigue. i couldn't focus on anything, i couldn't even move or walk without having the sensation of someone drilling right through my skull!

what's even worse is that, that very same day i have to start the first class for the national board exam tutoring that will go on every day for a month. add all those symptoms plus exam related stress and anxiety... i was a full blown mess. i was supposed to move to my study group's apartment on early November, but my seemingly simple fever kept on plaguing me. on day 7 of this very confusing fever episode, red spots started to appear on my extremities. alarmed, i asked my dad to get me to the doctor as soon as possible, since it was starting to look like i caught dengue hemorrhagic fever.

one doctor trip and blood sample testing later, i got confirmed that my thrombocytes level was super low, only 70,000 (normal is 150,000-450,000). what made me panic even more was that the doctor said i have to go to the ER right at that moment to receive intravenous infusion right away, since there's really no medication you can administer to elevate Tb level except hydration.

so i went to the ER:

(in this photo you can actually see some of the red spots that appeared on my wrist)

i was hospitalized only for 2 days 2 nights, luckily. the professor in charge of me is a believer that if my Tb level keep increasing twice in a row, it's safe for me to go home. my study group sent me this herbal Chinese concoction that helped my Tb level to increase rapidly in a few days too :,)

throughout the entire time at the hospital, i was super stressed. imagine, you're only less than 30 days away from a major exam that is well known to be very hard but there you are, weak and lying on a hospital bed!? i cried almost every day because i felt very left out, everyone was being super ambitious while all i did during 11 of my sick days was sleep? i even considered opting out of the exam, because i thought there was no way i would still have enough time to study and catch up.

but my mum and dad, God bless my parents, persevered. my mum said something that left a special imprint in my mind: any time left before it finally happens is always time enough to do something about it.

it truly doesn't matter, how much everyone's clocking more studying hours than i do. by God's will, somehow 2 months before the exam i already started revising and joining classes, they were just light reads and i happened to be able to memorize things quickly, and my tryout results had been stable in passing scores, all before i got sick. it was as if the timing was right and knew i was gonna be sick 1 month before the exam. i didn't even try to be ambition driven, i was just 'jokingly' revised, since i was already done with my MiniCEx exams quicker than some of the others. so yup, i still have time to extort all my efforts to finish the 'challenge' ahead.

with that being said, i'll put credit where it's due. i have a study group called Weekend Ceria, and it consists of 2 boys and 8 girls. at first we didn't really know each other much, but after one month through ups and downs shared together... we're besties! it was a wonderful time spent living together in the apartment with them, i laughed a lot. i feel so happy in every moment we have. they're seriously one of the best support systems/backing bones during the hard times. i don't think i can write down my favorite memories i have with them, since it'll be a super long post. i hope we'll graduate and do the Hippocratic oath as dentists together on February 2022!

also!!! i had my 24th birthday on the day before the big exam day... :~) Weekend Ceria surprised me right 00.00 on the clock with a strawberry cheesecake and loads of Elmo related stuffs! they got me Elmo eye blinds, wallet, keyring, and neck plushie :D we had birthday lunch at Seirock-ya Ramen later on the day. i felt genuinely super happy, grateful, and most importantly: loved.

on the days of the big exam, it was thrilling in a way i was so nervous yet i know that this would be the beginning of the end, the end of 6.5 years study on being a dentist. so i was also excited :D on the night of the last day of the exam, Weekend Ceria had a BBQ party and we had so much fun with all the exam tension evaporated along with the smokes of our beef slices hahaha

we all went home and finally checked out from our shared apartment on the next morning. i couldn't help but feel emotional, these 10 soon-to-be dentists had been with me for the last 1 month, and i'm not really that good at dealing with goodbyes, though technically we'll meet again lol but we got teary eyed when we took our last group photo at the apartment.

end note, all of us did our best during the CBT and OSCE exams, and i sincerely wish all of us too will receive the same good news 17 days from now.

i'll see you soon on the next post with that very good news! ;-)

[aro-dynamic]

hey! i was scrolling through the notes here and i think it's been a while, but you seemed to be asking in good faith so i wanted to add another two cents. the post is about people who don't care about their friends and are just pretending to be friends to preach to them, but you brought up a different situation and a good point imo! i wrote a very long post because that's just what i do, but i can summarize if needed. :)

you're right that if you're (general you) an evangelical christian and you make genuine non-christian friends and you want to bring the gospel to them so that they're saved, that can be an act of love. it must feel like a terrible burden to worry that most of the world might be damned; as an ex-evangelical christian, i imagine my immediate family's secular life fills my aunt with great sadness. i don't have belief in as fixed an afterlife as the christian heaven, but i'm an irish polytheist and my partner is a hellenist raised catholic, so i guess it'd be a bummer not to see them in tír na n-óg. it means accepting death of a loved one as final, and gods know humans have trouble with that.

but back on track, the thing about friendship is that healthy friendships aren't just built on acts of altruistic love or a drive towards the "greater good" of saving someone. those kinds of friendships are the kind that burn out really fast.

respect of boundaries and personal independence/autonomy are just as profound expressions of love, and the thing is, even you believe with every fiber of your being that you're saving someone for eternity, if you push your religion on a friend, you're not respecting them as a person. they might already be pretty confident in their religious beliefs or lack thereof. heck, they might even feel that you're the wrong one! many religions, despite not proseletyzing as much as evangelical protestants, are just as earnest in their beliefs.

and it can touch upon old wounds, too! you don't want to do that to a friend. for many folks, there's been centuries of historical precedent to be wary of folks trying to convert you, whether it ends in pogroms or forced boarding schools. and on the flip side, i personally have a lot of serious trauma surrounding my childhood church as a queer person. if someone kept pushing that with me, even if they believed it was the good and kind thing to do, i don't think i could be friends anymore, for my own mental health.

(i'd say in this day and age, when evangelical churches show up in voting blocs that sway elections and strip people of their rights, that there's a very current justification for this worry, unfair as it may seem.)

a big part of friendship is built on another kind of faith, too- the faith that a person we love will do what's best for themself. you can encourage someone to seek therapy or end a relationship or quit their soul sucking job, but you can't do it for them. and likewise, i don't think you can change someone's religion for them without sacrificing this idea that they're their own person. that doesn't mean you can't say that praying helps you deal with stress if they ask! or even that you can't go to church with them if they want to come. though i'd make sure the week's sermon isn't gonna be on how awful nonbelievers are, cause a conversion through fear and manipulation isn't the best conversion, or the best friend move.

i once got accused during my bible study program that i didn't love my jewish best friend enough because i didn't want to evangelize to her, knowing her religion was just as important to her as mine. my instructor (one of my heroes) told me it'd be on my conscience if she went to hell. so this question feels really personal to me. i guess i want to challenge folks to treat friendships as multidimensional. knowing when to back off should be just as much an act of love as many envision sharing the gospel to be.

tl;dr disrespecting boundaries is a jerk move to a friend, christian or not. don't be a jerk. let people be their own people and love them as they are. that's the least selfish friendship you can have.

something that rly creeps me out…..occasionally ill see videos or articles for christians or christian missionaries that say something like “what you need to do is make friends with non christians and really get them to trust you and THEN you start preaching to them and bringing them to jesus” and that is….man how much would it hurt to know that the only reason someone’s hanging out with you is to convert you to a religion you were never interested in. maybe this is a real friend, someone you really really feel like you connect to, and all of a sudden you cant hang out with them without being scared they’ll bring out the jesus stuff.