#how am I to cope when no HATSUNE MIKU

[deepestuniversallove]

Hey I literally logged in just to give you support. Don't listen to these idiots telling you that you're gross for loving Mewtwo.

Because if loving Mewtwo is gross then the entire monster-fucking community should also be shamed but they aren't hmmmmmm I wonder why.

The degenerates in this fandom are perfectly fine with Ash fucking Latias, and men fucking Gardevoir, Vaporeon, or whatever slutty monster girl bitch of the week, but nooo you self shipping with Mewtwo is apparently cONcERnING or whatever.

(I love how no one calls the Hatsune Miku guy names lol, do I smell double standards? )

But this doesn't surprise me because the Pokemon community is full of hypocrites and these are the same no - life losers who shit their pants because Ash isn't in the anime anymore, their parents truly failed in raising them.

Lord knows I faced enough trouble for loving Steven and that too, from an Eevee fucker.

Monika, sweetie you are doing nothing wrong, your love for Mewtwo is so innocent, sweet and pure. I think it's beautiful how helped you with depression and escape your narcissistic mother.

People on this site love to preach mental health support but the very minute you do something different yet harmless suddenly it's

"OH NO YOU DARE TO LOVE A "FICTIONAL CHARACTER"

Keep on giving them rectal bleeding and draw more of you and Mewtwo ;) I love to see it.

AHH thank you so much for this message!! 🥹 That is so sweet of you!

Yeah, I dunno why it has always been like this. Even 10 or even 20 years ago, I often got messages chastising me for selfshipping with Mewtwo, calling it "nasty" and "degenerate", when really, i am not doing it to specifically be a degenerate, but because I honestly love Mewtwo. In his story, he too had to fight against a narcissistic "parent" (Giovanni), just like I had to against my own. How can it be seen as a crime to want to believe? Or has it been wrong to say "Mewtwo, please teach me to be brave like you" in my mind during the hard times, especially back when I was a lonely child?

Haha, I doubt anyone could ever shame the monster fucker community out of what they are doing. Or the furry community for that matter. 🤣

There always seems to be some sort of underlying misogyny happening. Women are expected to get an IRL husband/boyfriend to serve as soon as possible, so seeing a woman openly rather selfship with a fictional character is threatening to them, because how dare a woman not be in the kitchen and make sandwiches for a man? How dare a woman prefer to be single when there is a "male crisis of loneliness" happening?

Then again, I don't think I owe society anything. Where was society when I was abused? Where was the help or the community when I needed them most? I was left to my own devices. When a fictional character like Mewtwo brings someone like me more hope than any IRL human, that's how I know we failed as a society. Even sicker is that other more destructive forms of coping mechanisms are more encouraged. Somehow selfshipping is seen as more evil by the "moral police" than dying from a drug overdose on the streets or having alcoholism.

Anyone who ever complains to me about "ruining Mewtwo" or whatever - no, you aren't "concerned", you are just using that word to camouflage that what you really want is control over me and what I put out there. And i can tell you it is futile. I haven't survived so far just for some snotty brats to tell me what i can or cannot do in MY online space. Don't like what I post? Tough titties, use the block button. No one is forcing you to look at my "cringe". My cringy stuff brings me joy and makes me happy, and I feel I deserve some happiness in this shitty world of ours. You do too, so just..go and have some fun yourself. Don't waste your only life on policing others.

So yeah, you are right, dagdasgoddess. I will keep giving people "rectal bleeding". 🤣 No one can stop me from loving Mewtwo, my guardian angel that even visits me in my dreams at night, and loves me even when I absolutely despise myself. He will always be a bastion of love for me, a symbol that life is worth living regardless of hardships.

[cestacruz]

I want to learn more about the master Artoria Au

🥹❤️❤️ueueueu

It's quite more extensive than Just the Holy Grail War

The lineup until now is

Saber: Musashi and Iori Miyamoto (Master(s) in the works)

Archer: James Moriarty (Master is Cassidy, i already posted something bout her)

Lancer: (Might be) Qin Liangyu (master in the works)

Rider: Ludwig van Beethoven (I already have her master but i refuse to post about them for now. I need dignity. I'll say two words to describe them tho: Hatsune Miku)

Caster: Zeno of Elea (no master yet)

Assassin: Hassan of the Shining Star (no master yet either) (also funnily enough, ive had Shining Star in this AU since two years ago, so imagine my surprise when he got released LMAO)

And well, Berserker: Queen Guinevere (and yknow, master Arturia)

It's sorta a modern AU but not at the same time, i'll put a cut here because its long and i ramble

It's not a Forced project to bring Arthur back like with Gray but the alternate name i use for this AU in my notes is "The Once and Future King" so...

History repeating itself sorta thing but without the doomed narrative (unless.) (Haha just kidding...) (...unle--)

The "pendragon|orkney" family does exist (as in mom(igraine)(she's alive), dad(uther)(he left them), morgan and lot, and nephews and nieces (morgan lost a bet to 5 year old arturia and had to name her kids after the knights) and more arthuriana characters are scattered around too, but they dont have an importance to the HGW part of the AU, with the exception of a few

They still call her Arturia (TECHNICALLY they call her Arthuria, because i love that name and no one will take it from me) because the few years that Uther was with them, he called Arturia "Arthur" because he wanted a boy and he couldnt cope (theres the History repeats itself motif and also misogynistic men like that still exist), so Morgan used Arthur*ia* as a nickname, and it stuck

This is where i will confess that im thinking of using a different name for Arturia, i already Kinda do in my notes. As in legal name (thinking of Aurlyn, which is similar but different enough). I would be doing the same with some of the Orkney siblings whose names would not be as common in the modern world or too obvious a reference, while still being named after the knights (Gareth would stay as Gareth cuz thats literally still a mormal name people use, but a name like Agravain or Mordred arent as common, ig. Or Gawain. And Gaheris. Actually only Gareth has a mormal fcking name)

ALSO mordred is Morgan and Lot's kid in this. No weird cloning in my modern AU. Genetics from the pendragon hit hard tho, they still look like Arturia

Actually idk what else to say rn, theres some more stuff but its escaping my mind, so little random stuff

Arturia's family has little to no mage relation currently, but they still have mage blood and sht

Also Merlin manipulated Morgan(modern) using her literal dreams, into freeing him from Avalon and he used to that hang out with little kid Arturia at the park (everyone hates him/chases him away)

The reason why Cath Palug is there is because this AU follows the F/SN timeline, which is a timeline in which Chaldeas never formed. Therefore, Fou never learned to love people, teehee. He only learned to hate Merlin and King Arthur (?)

Also theres a modern Guinevere, tho her name is literally just Gwen, and Arturia and her met during high school Time but they werent Actually classmates (think like, tournaments or trips to other school/places). I called her "arturia's high school crush" in the tags of a previous ask but they are still friends and talk a lot

And yeah , thank u and i am, Very happy that you asked bout it

[attavoid]

Honami Mochizuki, Avoidance, Broken Bonds, and Responsibility

I’ve always been a big fan of Vocaloid since 2010 when I was a wee child- I even mess with vocal synths in my free time and make songs when confident enough in my skills- and I’d been eyeing Project Sekai (or Hatsune Miku: Colorful Stage, but I’ll be referring to it as Prjsk) for a while now. I adore rhythm games and they help me calm down, but I never really bit the bullet until recently. I have no idea why I waited so long! I’ve only been playing for a couple weeks but I’m already mastering the skills and am climbing up.

Anyway, one of my good friends brought me to the attention of Honami Mochizuki, and how many people headcanon her as having AvPD. I’ll assume if you’re reading this you have a vague idea of how the game works, but I’ll explain the background of her and her unit, Leo/need.

Honami is one of four girls in Leo/need, all who were childhood friends who drifted apart when Saki, another part of the group, was hospitalized for chronic illness (which, by the way, I could go on about how surprsingly respectful they are about her disability rep, at least in my opinion as a narcoleptic with a weak immune system). Despite being very close in elementary school, now that they’re all in high school, Honami has drifted from the others and tends to stick with her classmates, seemingly always following their lead.

A common misconception of AvPD is that avoidants don’t have friends. That can be true, but not in the sense that people think! In the past, I had a friend group, but we weren’t exactly friends. I morphed myself for approval so that they’d validate me and I’d be accepted, but I was not myself, and I did not let myself be vulnerable, as close friends should. Even though we had all been “close” since elementary school, what it really was for me was that I had found a group that I thought had accpeted me- only because I had hidden the parts of me they found embarrassing. They still berated me and my choice in other friends that I did actually have connections with, which caused me to drift away from them. That’s something evident in Honami’s story- she sticks with her “friends” because she wanted to get their validation, but these friends didn’t like the other members of Leo/need, so Honami forced herself to stray away from them to avoid being judged and humiliated.

This is something I don’t see discussed much about AvPD- the effect it has on your friends. Although I agree that personality disorder information should focus on those with the disorder, it’s also important to remember the effects it has on those around you (without buying into the abuse propaganda, of course). Honami’s past all too well highlights a part of my journey in AvPD that I wish more people talked about- betraying your friends just for your self image as a coping mechanism. It feels like it keeps you safe, but in reality, it doesn’t. It just hurts your true bonds and further isolates yourself into a group that will take advantage of you and use you as a punching bag.

Even as a 21 year old, I still find myself struggling with this, and I find great comfort in this aspect of Honami’s character. Especially how awkward she is trying to get along with her friends again- repairing old friendships, especially when you’re the source of the rift (for the most part), is always hard. And I love that she doesn’t give up! She keeps going and we see her slowly become more comfortable again with her friends and finding that spark of joy they ignited when she was a child.

I do want to add a disclaimer- I don’t think this coping mechanism is an abuse tactic, but it’s still important to remember the effect it has on other people. When I did this in the past, I thought I was protecting myself and our friendship- why would they want to be seen with someone like me?- but in reality I was hurting them and our bond. Instead of framing this as an abuse tactic, in Prjsk, it’s framed as Honami bearing some responsibility for the drifting, yet respects where she comes from and doesn’t vilify her for it at the same time. It’s quite refreshing, and even though she doesn’t canonically have AvPD, I can definitely see these traits in her, and I absolutely headcanon her with it.

Maybe someday I’ll do a more indepth analysis of Honami having AvPD, but I wanted to especially comment on this part of her. I feel when AvPD is talked about we gloss over the responsiblity we do have on relationships, unless it’s in a negative light painting us as abusers, which isn’t true. Even if Leo/need isn’t my favourite group, I think Honami will continue to have a special place in my heart.

[w98pops]

i am blinking at you so sweetly. 13 or 45 for the FO OC ask thing for. whoever <3333

FO OC ask post!

45. Do they have any specific hobbies or talents?

I can answer this one for everyone because I absolutely adore thinking bout my characters' silly little interests!!!

Aletus is a history nerd, he collects all type of pre-war stuff and has a giant secret box filled with holotapes. Wendy kinda inherited this from him, they are both insufferable when it comes to 2050s movies. Especially action films and westerns :) He also is reeeally into singing. He's awful at it ofc, never had much practice plus it's hard to enjoy this hobby while you sleep in a tent filled with 70 other men. RIP to him, would've loved Hatsune Miku :(

Wendy is super autistic about rifles. Is cleaning your gun 7 times a day a hobby? She loves the weight, the feel, and the power over people that having a firearm gives you. Hates the recoil tho! No one ever taught her how to properly use a gun, so first couple of months were filled with shoulder and hand bruises. She is also into cowboys, already mentioned the pre-war pop culture brain tumor that Wendy's dad imprinted on her. AND she likes to tend to brahmins. Not really her talent, more of a skill she had to learn being a child slave in the Legion and all that, but Wendy liked it so good for her!

Sharky's hobby is weed.

Nico actually uhmm.. never had any special interests :( He IS fanatically religious but I don't feel like it's a hobby, more of a lifestyle he accepted to cope with the bad stuff. Nicodemus is all about his work, he loves to talk to people and listen. I feel like after his escape from the Legion he started exploring himself as a person. He enjoyed fishing and playing guitar. Got really into leatherwork and knitting after a few years living with the Khans, a little into drawing but never got too good at it. With age, he kinda ends up a stereotype of an old guy at a campfire telling cool stories to children sitting around. Again, good for him!!

[oc-x-canon-chaos]

Finally making an intro post. Hi

Sup. I’m a cringey little weirdo and I like Vocaloid, as you can tell from my profile picture. I am autistic and rely on imagining fictional characters to help me handle tough stuff in my life. Keep that in mind if you talk to me.

I do not tolerate ship discourse. I don’t care if you’re pro or anti, if I don’t like the ship, I’m blocking you. Im curating my experience, and my experience says no to basically every popular ship. If you don’t like that, this isn’t the blog for you, the only ship stuff I’m reblogging is me x my F/O. I think “pro ship” people are childish and immature, so if you unironically call yourself that, leave me alone and touch grass, but I’ve also had people say I’m a bad person for self shipping with a video game villain, so like. Extremists on either side DNI. I will block you. Fyi, I WILL block and report adults who self ship with minors. ESPECIALLY if the character isn’t aged up. I know there’s nuance to aging up characters if they naturally sue over the course of their story or whatever, but if the character is a kid and your s/I is an adult it grosses me out and it’s creepy af.

I also block people whose self ships are purposefully abusive. It feels like you’re romanticizing abuse and idc if it’s a coping mechanism, it makes me uncomfortable and I’m controlling MY experience. I’m fine with “sharing” F/Os, as long as you aren’t shaming my headcannons while you do it. I’m not gatekeeping Megurine Luka from everyone ever, I just don’t want to get harassed because you don’t like the pet name I think she’d use for me. Im a polyselfshipper, so all the fictional characters I’m “dating” are with me at the same time. Right now, I only have two romantic F/Os, and they aren’t dating each other. Most of my F/Os are platonic or familial. If I’m posting about an underage character, assume they’re my imaginary adopted child. I’m not being gross about them, I promise. I love interacting in reblog games! I might make some of my own!

My F/Os include:

Megurine Luka. She’s a romantic/queerplatonic partner of mine, and she’s very sweet. I imagine she’s with me to help when I’m in a crowded situation or experiencing anxiety— she is an idol, after all, and she’s used to crowds!

Springtrap. Yes, that Springtrap. He’s a queerplatonic/romantic partner. He’s here to make me feel like I have someone strong and scary on my side, to defend me. On the other side, I show him how to be a person again, by taking care of my needs. It’s a real “I can fix him” situation.

Hatsune Miku. She’s a platonic/best friend F/O. She helps with my self esteem, and makes me feel a loved and appreciated. Also, she’s Miku. There are no cons of imaginary best friend Miku.

Elizabeth Afton. Before anyone gets concerned, she is a familial F/O. I see her as my adopted kid. She helps me feel like I can protect and care for someone, and that I’m not irresponsible enough to let her get Circus Baby’d.

Withered Chica! She’s like my daughter and I love her so much. I think the official lore is that me and Springtrap adopted her (in my self ship AU, he’s separate from William, he just has his soul, so he wasn’t technically responsible for that happening to her)

Kaai Yuki. She’s another fictional adopted child of mine. I want to keep her safe!

Lacey from Lacey’s games. She’s another adopted kid F/O, I just want her to have a happy life, and imagine I rescued her and am helping her grow up and move through her trauma.

Mr. Plant and Argos from the World of Mr. Plant! They’re platonic/friend F/Os. I just like to imagine that I’m hanging out with them in the Void.

Gumi. she’s Gumi.

Howl (from howl’s moving castle). we have chemistry but we aren’t, like, together or anything, I just like thinking about him. I guess he’s my celebrity crush F/O!

There are a few others, but these are my main F/Os!

Some images that remind me of them ⬇️

[arsenalsquid]

MY VIRTUAL SINGER SONG TIMELINE

I wanna make this as a little story about my earliest connections to Vocaloid/Virtual Singers and how it all led me to loving them.

#1 Nyanyanyanyanyanyanya!

Without a doubt, this was the first. All those YouTube videos and internet memes, it was the "Nyan Cat song" of course! But... in reality, it was actually a Miku song, but super sped up. I and many others wouldn't know, so my jaw DROPPED when a friend hovered over the song in Project DIVA, but that wouldn't be until much later. While this wasn't my true start, it would be a long journey.

#2 Senbonzakura and LOL – Lots of Laugh –

Maaany years later, and here I am! My first actual exposure to Hatsune Miku! I'd download a ton of 3DS demos to play, and Project Mirai was one of them. These two would be burned into my mind forever. I even remember going out of my way and searching them up on YouTube, and being amazed by the visuals on arcade/PS4!! I now understood the most basic concept of Miku; someone who sings. I don't remember why I liked this though. I must have seen it as a cute game, with cute songs and fun visuals. But, that would be it. I'd eventually delete the demo, forget about the songs, and move on... but not before...

#3 Kagerou Daze

The first song I encountered on my own! I discovered it while looking at videos of Senbonzakura and LOL, so this was around the same time as that. It was this animated one in particular that I saw the most! I believe I did see the Project DIVA music video, too. I just found myself so enthralled by this, it was so different from the cutesy songs I was just listening to. It was such a heavy feeling song, but the pacing made it so fun to listen to. A feeling that would return later... I listened to these 3 songs a lot, but yeah, I just stopped and didn't really bother looking for more.

#4 Tokyo Teddy Bear

Once again, more years would pass, but this was it. I was having a VRChat session with friends, and one of them put on some virtual singer songs. I didn't really care or pay any attention to them, and just chatted or drew. That is until they put Tokyo Teddy Bear, the Kasane Teto cover. I completely stopped what I was doing and just stared. It was like my friend's voices disappeared and all I could see and hear was this song... and it's visuals. And when it ended, I asked my friend to play it again, and again. It was kind of funny, as they pointed out how I looked just standing still and staring. He showed me some other Teto songs, like Teto Territory and that Fukkireta song.

Afterwards...

I was OBSESSED with Teto. My PFP, reaction gifs I'd send, and non-stop talking for about a week straight. I was so happy to find something I liked this much. And that's when my friend showed me Project DIVA Mega Mix+!! I've come full circle. From there I liked even MORE songs, and after a day or two of him showing me the game, I bought it alongside the DLC, and bam. Vocaloid/Virtual Singer lover forever. Got Project SEKAI, downloaded Project DIVA and Mirai on my PS Vita and 3DS, and got a few merchandise.

I've never felt this obsessed with something in a long while, I think my last thing was Persona 3 back in high school. It's really fun though!! Listening and finding all sorts of new music, seeing the music videos, building my playlist, sharing it with others. I definitely skimmed through a bit, but music means a lot to me. And this form of music is just so amazing to me, a near endless supply of songs to listen to. It makes me so happy. Even the most depressing songs make me happy, because I have something to listen and connect to when I'm down. I love using music as a coping skill !!!!!!

Thank you for reading if you did!!!! This is more of a personal post for me to save >_< My love for this will keep growing :3

[candypby]

I don't understand how someone as beautiful as you is single. Are you lying?

i eat plastic off the floor in public parks and am the heaviest object known to man. my parents tried to put my back in when i was born and i broke all of their fingers. it's illegal for me to drive any car that isn't silly. originally there was 13 hours on a clock and i ripped them off and told them to cope with their pathetic useless existence that only pains every person alive and gives no benefit and all other clocks in the world got so scared they deleted the 13th hour. every ride in every amusement park kills all the passengers when i'm on the ride as well. poptarts taste bad to me when im happy. i can walk a handful of angry dogs at once but only once. there are 10 right shoes and 13 left shoes in my closet. spaghettios become regular spaghetti if i walk by them in the store so i have to avoid the aisle. i predicted 9/11. i know 5 decimals of pi and that's all you need to know. lee harvey oswald asked me if he looked good in glasses and i said meh. i gave a blow job on the floor of the largest room in the petit trianon to a ghost with a strap on on and debated it if that was a real blow job or a plastic job or whatever else. i can only read mandarin backwards. i steal mail from people and delivery at funny hours like 4:20PM or 4:20AM. i saw miku hatsune at the dmv and didnt know what to do so i told her she didn't need to renew her license and it was a scam. i put every individual seed on each strawberry before i kiss them goodnight. i love the smell of diesel. i know every single line in the pilot for wow wow wubbzy but only if you tickle me a little first. i have 3 keys on my keyring and i dont know what two of them go to even though i carry it everyday. i know what every plant known to man tastes like. idk

[dawnofthedreadd]

oddly specific monster high headcanons that i need to get out somewhere (all that autism)

venus is willing to go absolutely apeshit on people who hurt their friends but refuses to ever curse. they'll literally beat up a man for you but will say shit like "you stinker!! you doodoo head!!" against their enemies

they also shave their eyebrows

frankie is the literal definition of the "this push pop is banging yo!" meme (clawdeen is telling them they're eating a glue stick)

ghoulia has watched neon genesis evangelion at least once and can fully understand the ending and everything about it, probably reported on it for a school project at least once and took up a whole class period (she is also a huge marvel fan)

lagoona is a mitski stan

clawdeen came out to clawd n he replied w "woaah you like girls? that's awesome me too! it must run in the family"

lagoona has taken an "am i gay" quiz at least once after getting close to toralei

avea hates people actually taking horseback rides on her but makes one single exception for bonita (despite bonita flying everywhere)

vandala died during a shipwreck which is why she's constantly timing herself and working on improving its pirate skills. it also has ptsd from dying n river helps her cope w it

kiyomi n river were born ghosts, porter doesn't tell people how they died n makes up stories Abt it like spectra (in reality he probably died in some stupid ass way like falling down the stairs)

speaking of them porter n spectra r t4t but opposite directions. porter transfem and agender pansexual + spectra transmasc gay demiboy

rochelle and garrott are the couple who date for years only to realize they are both gay as hell. they spend weeks talking to friends trying to figure out how to tell the other n when they finally come out to each other they're like "phew thank goodness". they're wlw n mlm bffs

heath loves silly shows like impractical jokers and walk the prank and uses them to think of new silly ways to prank the other students (fails miserably each time)

howleen listens to hatsune miku and is her biggest fan

venus porter holt and deuce definitely smoke weed together/hsrs

luna n lorna are cryptid best friends (lorna probably checks out boo york after monster high and they meet at bloodway)

luna and bonita are half siblings who occasionally hang out together to infodump abt their special interests or hyperfixations (luna's is musical theater, bonita's is fashion design) and their blue-purple gfs (elle and avea)

bonita and skelita are also cousins

g1 frankie uses they/them the most but is comfortable w any prns

being that they're made of slime gooliope is prone to occasionally melting during the summer. they just kinda come apart sometimes but reform easily. they're very flexible being made of goo and use this to freak people out w silly gymnastic tricks

cleo wears wigs which is how she changes hair so much, her real hair length is that of i heart shoes/skull shores

draculaura is super into zodiac stuff despite not knowing the difference between astronomy and astrology

this is all i can think of rn trust me there's more.

[usetheforce]

Okay so let me set the scene: I’ve been up since 6 am after weeks of waking up at literally 11 am, i slept 5 hours last night and im still at work at 10 pm. I have an hour commute to and from work. I got here like 12 hours ago.

And then Disney announces all this shit. New mcu, new star wars. New indiana jones movie??? Disney originals???? CHRIS EVANS AS BUZZ LIGHTYEAR??!!??!

But wait theres more! Winx club live action on netflix, ashnikko collabbing w HATSUNE MIKU?!! Holy fucking shit. Im completely losing my mind, im in a full sweat, theres so much content i literally cannot function this is so overwhelming 😭

And now i just found out Brandon Bernard was executed tonight. My brain is already exploding, now im losing my shit completely.

And THEN i see this tweet:

SOBBBBBBB!!!! I legit feel like i got kicked in the face. The sound that came out of me when i saw this made me glad im the only one left at work. Really not sure how im still upright at this point. I love them so much oh my god 😭 this is the sweetest thing ever i really cant cope 😭😭

The whiplash of the last 3 hours alone!!!! Help!!!! Im truly suffering, my brain feels so fried im approaching off the charts levels of neurotic 😭💀

I need to lie down so bad, i feel like at any second ill either puke or pass out and i still have to drive an hour home 😭