#hope y'all had a better time with DT than i did lol

[arty-ffxiv]

💖Just a gentle nudge to remind you that you're not just existing—you're thriving, even on days when it doesn't feel that way. You're a one-of-a-kind force in this world, bringing light and love in ways you might not even realize. You've overcome so much, and you should be proud of every step you've taken, no matter how small. The world is better with you in it, and you've already made such a difference just by being you. Keep going, keep growing, and never forget how important you are💖

Thank you, who ever you are. This message warmed my heart and has been a well needed reminder ♥

I've not advertised it much, but I've been on a FFXIV/ Tumblr hiatus for the past ~5ish weeks; this blog has been running on old, queued content since then. I'm feeling quite drained and burned out, and frustrated as I'd just gotten back into my creative outlets again.

It's the longest time I've taken away from the game, and I didn't want to step away so soon from the FFXIV Tumblr community again after returning from another long hiatus.

Putting more under the cut, for those interested in IRL stuff. Otherwise, please know that I'm ok, just taking a break.

I've been in a bit of a strange place mentally, since before Dawntrail dropped.

In the week leading up to the expac's early access release, I was made redundant from a job role that I really loved. I'd been in limbo regarding my role for a number of months, and hadn't anticipated any movement or news for at least another few months- things move slowly in the community services world.

I had a week of annual leave booked for the expansion release- I was keen for the break, and excited to be going into the new adventure with the new friends I'd made within the Tumblr FFXIV community.

2 days before I was due to go on leave, I was told I was having a meeting with HR and my line manager. I was advised to bring a support person.

My anxiety sky rocketed, and the next day I was given the news of my redundancy. I was given some options to mull over for the next few days- redeployment to another site, putting in an application for a more senior role with no guarantee I'd be successful, or to leave the organization.

As you can imagine, this put a big dampener on my excitement for Dawntrail. I'm grateful that the news came when it did, so at least my leave was spent with something to focus on instead of just moping about, but it just fucking sucked.

I was spending most of my time on leave in game, trying to keep my mind off work and the mess of emotions and confusion I knew I'd be coming back to. I enjoyed the expac- at least the first half. I wasn't emotionally prepared, or ready, for the second half.

I won't be going into details for those who have yet to finish the MSQ, nor to upset myself further.

The second half of the story was just too much; I spent my time in the last zone consumed with the thoughts of I'm not having fun anymore, I'm not enjoying this, let's just rip this fucking bandaid off and get through it, we can process all the feelings this is dredging up for us later.

Since finishing the MSQ, I've not really done much else in-game or really logged in again. I've been reflecting on it, and I think the ending of the expac triggered some deep-seated traumas for me. This, coupled with the grief and mixed emotions of moving into a new work environment, has really exhausted me.

I'm 5 weeks into my new workplace, and I'm enjoying it but am just so exhausted. While I'm still in the same organization, my workload is more than it was previously and I've lost the motivation I'd only recently gotten back for FFXIV and creating.

Hopefully now that I've gone through the motions of resettling and learning the ropes in this new space, my creativity will begin to come back. I can only hope.

[bbrandy2002]

Choices Fandom Appreciation

Hey! I'm still here lol for the most part anyway. 

So I started reading here in March 2019. I had just finished playing TRR for the first time and needed to get my fix of Liam stories before the second book was waiting to come out. Like most people do, I lurked for a few weeks, reading everyone from @romanticatheart-posts and @annekebbphotography and several others who I haven't seen around since that time. I remember sitting in an Arbys DT when I got a notification that @dcbbw had published a much anticipated chapter from The Commoners Wife, and of course I had to pull into a parking spot and read it before returning home. And then sneaking glances of @ao719s during a staff meeting, hoping Liam would get his kingdom back from Madeleine after he abdicated. I never planned to write and when I finally did, I never had any expectations of being anywhere as great as those I've mentioned; I just wanted to do it for the fun, and that still holds just as true today.

I also never expected to make the friendships Ive made. To me, I value those far more than any reblog, or note, or praise (y'all know I get uncomfortable with those 😆). Within a month of writing my first drabble, I met my best friend --not just my Tumblr one -- but the one who has become my sister, my sidekick, who knows me better than I know myself. @burnsoslow I dont know what I did to deserve you, but I believe in God and feel that he knew the hardest thing I would ever have to go through was just around the corner, and sent you to get me through it. And you did. You've never let me give up on anything, whether its writing or in real life. You're always pushing me higher, further, faster ... because where I see limits in myself, you see possibilities, talents, and gifts.

@dcbbw and @sirbeepsalot Aside from the fact you two were among the first to read and encourage me, (inspire me), our zoom meets last year brought me to life. The shenanigans, the gossip, the papaya, the brainstorming that inspired so many fics. Ive missed you both lately, just wanted you to know how special you are to me.

@txemrn and @charlotteg234 My Armie girls 😍 I love you both so much. Im thinking its time for another movie night real soon.

@ao719 Oh my goodness, where to start with you lol Aside from your talent, you're just a genuinely wonderful and kind person. You've also supported me from the beginning and along the way we've managed to drop some of that introvertedness and talk to one another without our intermediary, Burns 😂 Youve got the most amazing wit and humor of anyone I know, but can flip it like a switch to be encouraging and lift my spirits when I have those doubts about myself.

And to the following, I wish I could speak individually of each of you, but im so tired now (its late) lol but just now how special you are to me and how much I value your friendships and support, so very much:

@kingliam2019 @queenjilian @bebepac @ofpixelsandscribbles @cordoniaqueensworld @amandablink @hopelessromanticmonie @alyssalauren @monsoonblooms12 @mom2000aggie @gkittylove99 @neotericthemis @yourmajesty09 @gabesmommie1130 @kat-tia801 @emkay512 @cordonia-gothqueen @foreverethereal123 @nestledonthaveone @callmeellabella @jessiembruno @forallthatitsworth @sfb123​   If I left anyone off, it wasn’t intentional -- except for one person​

And yes, I’m going to update Fools Rush In soon, and will be posting Fearless this weekend (probably lol).