#hope this was interesting for people who are not just me!! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lani-heart · 2 days ago

Text

|| series masterlist || next // previously ||

genre(s) -> smut, fluff, non-idol, hybrid au, poly au paring(s) -> yunho ( centric ) x reader warning(s) -> smut, mdni. 18+ words -> 3.5k

abstract -> sometimes... the quietest are who are suffering the most

yunho’s perspective

How long have I been looking at this wall?

It was boring that I was stuck in here alone with my thoughts. I missed Mingi… even if we lived poorly. We had many stories about being on the street… but it was selfish of me to reminisce. He was happier… healthier and way better than he would be with me.

“Yunho… cheer up today! There’s an adoption fair this afternoon!” The employee said I could only offer a soft smile to cover up my emptiness.

Maybe… I'll get adopted and get a new start.

Maybe someone will fill the whole Mingi left… and I can atone for what I did when I was a thief, especially to her.

y/n’s perspective

“I see,” Mingi said after I finally sat down and talked to him about it. “Is it selfish to want to ask you to adopt him… but also feel sick at the thought?” he said and I smiled softly.

“I’m leaving this decision to you, if you’re not comfortable with me adopting him I won’t” I confirmed and he nodded. “I just don’t want to feel like he’s replacing me” he muttered and I sighed.

“He’d never replace you… look at it like this, Mingi. Yeosang and Wooyoung had the same insecurity” I said and he looked shocked.

“Wooyoung got so bad that he got into a small depressive episode cause he thought I’d abandon him… that I only adopted him because I wanted to be with San,” I said and he stayed silent… deep in thought.

“I don’t treat them differently do I?” I asked and he shaked his head. “And Yeosang thought the same thing but I'd never treat any of you differently…you’re my made family,” I said and he then hugged me in I rubbed his back hoping to comfort him.

“Yunho had everything… he was perfect and he was never punished or anything. He would get away with everything” he muttered clearly envious. “You wouldn't be treated differently,” I said and he nodded.

“I know… and I do really miss him,” he said with a sad smile. “Today is an adoption fair… so this decision–” “I want Yunho back,” he said, cutting me off.

In the end… they were a bonded pair.

mingi’s perspective

I felt sick… nervous, anxious… What if he didn’t want to see me again? What if he decided to take revenge and steal them all from me? But I also really missed him. I wanted him by my side again…

The adoption fair was huge… It had lots of people looking at hybrids, special needs hybrids, yellow codes, some orange codes, and of course the green codes. But there wasn’t any place to see red or purple code hybrids, not to mention the black codes.

Everyone though always seemed to be attracted to green codes, the prejudice of other codes sometimes isn’t aggression. But instead mental health or– “Jaemin told me that’s his” she whispered to me while pointing at the kennel at the end of the hall.

“Can I… go alone first?” I asked and she gave me a sweet smile and let go of my hand. I took a deep breath as I walked to the kennel. Yunho didn’t even see or hear me… he looked lost in thought lying down on his bed that could barely even fit him.

“What’s so interesting about the ceiling?” I said and his ears twitched as he looked at me clearly confused. “Mingi…” he said and I swear I saw his eyes start to tear up. “You look… so much better,” he said as he got closer to the glass door shielding us from each other.

“Yeah… she treats me like them. You were right about her you know… she’s one of the good ones” I said and he chuckled. He then just looked at me with a soft smile he used to… “I missed you” he muttered and I smiled. “I did too,” I said.

“Why are you here, Mingi?” he asked and I smiled. “No… I don’t want her to adopt me” he said and I was confused… “Mingi… I know you. You’ll get mad and not say anything… you’ll get jealous, and I want you to be–” “I won’t…” I know I was lying but I really wanted Yunho by my side again.

Everyone back home was amazing but… Wooyoung and San were glued to each other, and so were the tigers. Yeosang was independent… I wanted someone who would be by my side again. Even if I regret this decision.

But would I regret my decision?

“Want me to formally introduce you to the sweetest human you’ll ever meet?” I asked and he still looked at me skeptical but laughed anyway. “How is it?” he asked, now relaxing and I smiled, wanting to show him everything. Maybe even ask Seonghwa and Wooyoung to make my favorite dishes for them to make him.

“Where do I even start? I just know you’ll love it”

y/n’s perspective

“Mingi worries me…” I confessed to Kun. Mingi said he wanted to talk to Yunho some more so I told him I'd get the adoption papers done. “His weakness is Yunho… he seems to have a possessive part of him. He wouldn’t want to share with Yunho but I think in a way he also doesn't wanna share Yunho” he said and I agreed. “What if in the end, I can’t keep Yunho because Mingi won’t allow it?” I ask and he sighs.

“Then I doubt Yunho will ever be adopted… or he has a really rare chance of it,” he said and I sighed.

“There's nothing we can do but… risk it huh?” I asked and he nodded while I signed everything. I was truly worried about how everyone was gonna treat Yunho. They treated Mingi… great and honestly had the better transitions into our home but… Yunho I was really worried about and not because of everyone else but Mingi himself.

I waited in the waiting room when I saw Renjun and Mingi. “Yunho will be out soon but Mingi isn’t allowed in the grooming nor in Doyoung-hyung’s office” he explained and I nodded as he went back to work.

“Are you excited?” I asked and he grinned. “I finally have him back!” he said happily and I hoped… My worries were for nothing. He talked about Yunho constantly, telling everyone stories and only good things about him. While I knew he had some jealousy and envy towards the golden retriever hybrid.

None of it had aligned with his medical records. And how he was abused more than Mingi was.

Kun confirmed it… the file as well.

He confessed to being starved for weeks at a time and even being physically and sexually abused. While Mingi was also abused… he was starved for one week at a time, and physically abused. His heat and Yunho’s would also sync together making his previous owner lock him in a closet while–

“Yunho!” I felt myself snap away from my thoughts and see the golden retriever hybrid who I once thought was human now in a temporary collar and clothes while Mingi hugged him. He was attached quickly… They were a bonded pair after all.

Yunho didn’t want to look me in the eye and I didn’t push him too as Mingi just ranted and said he was gonna love their new home. Yunho only silently nodded and smiled… he was happy but looked reluctant.

“Ohh! And every week y/n takes me out to these cafes after my session! y/n the next time we go can we bring him a lot of the pastries!” he exclaimed and I agreed happily.

Yunho was also given therapy sessions but bi-weekly… and on Mondays… but for now I didn’t want to tell Mingi that… I didn’t want him to think Yunho was taking things from him already

At the apartment, everyone gave him a warm welcome… which Mingi said they should but he already looked a little dejected. Even saying “When I first came, everyone kinda hated me since we did steal from y/n,” he said already showing him the difference… Wooyoung was the first to speak up and say they warmed up pretty quickly to him but I didn’t necessarily tell them to be careful.

Though Yeosang and Seonghwa already seem skeptical.

Mingi soon dragged him around to show him everywhere away from everyone… Even when Wooyoung offered, he was immediately rejected by Mingi.

“What's the wolf’s problem?” Yeosang asked and I sighed. “A long story,” I said and he hummed while taking me to his room where Seonghwa followed.

“Mingi is acting differently towards us… almost like he doesn’t want us to get close to Yunho?” Seonghwa added and I sighed. “Mingi is extremely envious of Yunho. In his file it says he has a love-hate relation with his bonded pair. Jealous that he was treated better in his eyes in their old home even saying he had more favoritism while Mingi had the hard-hitting abuse” I said and they nodded.

“Was it not like that?” Yeosang asked and I shook my head. I handed him the file from my purse which he and Seonghwa read and they didn’t seem to read much before handing it back to me.

“So… what happens to the two?” he asked and I shrugged. “Nothing… we have to act normal and accept Yunho cause he’s a part of our home now”

yunho’s perspective

I wonder just how much she knew about the problem of me being here truly. Seeing Mingi already trying to isolate me from the others was… not a good sign.

Of course, he can’t do it forever. So while I had my own room, he already said how he was jealous of that but because no one could share a room with me.

He was mated to her… they all were, which was shocking. He clearly stated how much living here was like a dream and how much he wanted me here but deep down he was a liar.

Eventually, Mingi would show everyone just how much he hated me. Because while I do believe I mean something to him… at least in private, to others I'm soon gonna be discarded. Mingi hates when I take things from him because he assumes I already have more than him.

But I wanted to be selfish and enjoy my time with him… at least for the time being. I really did miss him and I could only hope he missed me like he was saying.

I don’t deserve a lifetime with him… so I'm hoping that fate can offer me a small amount of time with him until we separate again.

Mingi was not doing well emotionally.

I was happy seeing that he could interact with other hybrids so easily and even y/n who really was the sweetest person I’ve ever and probably will ever meet.

So seeing her trying to explain that I had a check-in with the hybrid specialist did not hit him well. Especially since I would be alone with her… doing something that was just like he would.

“Can I come with you?” he asked and she gave him a tight smile.

“Mingi…” she said trailing off and Yeosang scoffed. He wasn’t rude to me but he also seemed to understand what was happening actually… I think they all knew.

“It's for his health… you want him to be okay and happy with us right?” she asked him and he stayed silent before eventually nodding. “You should start going any longer and you’ll be late,” Hongjoong said and she nodded but not before looking at Mingi who was silently looking at the ground.

He didn’t even bother to look once as we left but I could see he was mad… his fists were clenched and his tail nervously moved. When we come back it won’t be a happy ending.

“I’m hoping he comes around to the realization… that well, you aren’t taking anything from him,” I said and he smiled softly. “So you noticed it too? Sorry…” he apologized and it made me wonder if Yunho was gonna be harder to transition into being in a happy home.

“It’s not your fault… don’t apologize when it's not needed I just hope you can enjoy it while being with us,” I said and he chuckled softly. “Everyone is really nice and you’re really exactly who I thought you’d be maybe even more… I hope so too that Mingi comes to the realization” he confessed and I nodded.

The rest of the walk was… quiet and well by the time we were here I wondered if Yunho would ever open up to me.

“You okay?” I heard and saw Jaemin. “Yeah… just worried for Yunho,” I said and he sighed. “Did Kun tell you about Yunho not being up for adoption anymore?” he asked and I nodded. He looked sad but it was a part of this job…

“Yunho is such a sweet hybrid but… so susceptible to pretending everything is okay and that makes him an easy target you know that” he explained and it was true. With him being so easily obedient his masking of how he actually feels is dangerous.

When hybrids are trained as well… obedient servants it makes it hard for them to find homes after since either transition will be hard or they’ll find themselves in another abusive home. These hybrids are often taken to the country with other hybrids and… well are under the hands of breeders. Which treat them well but… Mingi would regret it if that happened.

“y/n? Can we talk privately before Yunho is dismissed?” Kun came to ask and I nodded and said my goodbyes to Jaemin. “He’s finding it hard to interact with your other hybrids due to mingi, I would probably recommend separating them in the home for the time being but be careful since it might trigger Mingi. So I would recommend to talk it out with both of them” he offered and I nodded.

I trusted Kun’s input and Mingi needed something to push him into accepting a reality check.

I went outside after signing papers where I saw Yunho. He was currently sharing Mingi’s clothes and… well he even said he didn’t mind so I knew it came from a place of jealousy. He’d hate to see Yunho get treated better than him…

Mingi… didn’t like the day we got Yunho a collar either but I had to sit down and tell him it's something all of them have. Something that they have uniquely for them but from the same material each other has.

Mingi has a brownish pink collar while Yunho has a gray one with soft yellow jewels on it. The gesture alone I know made Mingi upset.

“Are you hungry? We could pass–” “No thanks…” he rejected and I know why. Though I didn’t want to push it… “I’ll ask Wooyoung to make you something special then?” I asked and he shook his head.

He would continue to reject anything given to him… as long as Mingi showed his insecurity.

yunho's perspective

I was worried about going up the elevator. Mingi exactly waiting…

“Mingi can I talk with you?” she asked and he nodded softly as she looked at me and gestured me to follow. Her other hybrids looked confused but as we made it to her room she gave us a shy smile.

“Kun offered some advice… that the two of you should separate for a bit just to help the transition. Mingi you should let him go around the apartment alone and even with everyone else okay?” she asked and he nodded softly.

“And please… share what you’re feeling? Bottling it up isn’t good for you” she told me and we nodded as we left her room. Mingi was angry…

“Did you go somewhere after?” he asked and I shook my head. “No, I wanted to come back to–” “I bet you did…” he muttered as he walked off but I sighed and caught up to him to grab his wrist when he suddenly jerked back and looked at me angrily.

“Why do you steal everything from me!” he yelled at me and I knew this was gonna happen. “I went through hell with our old owner and you got off easy! You never suffered anything! You were 'Golden Boy Yunho'!” he yelled angrily and it was starting to piss me off.

“Mingi?” I heard as I saw the panther… Mingi stayed silent, probably clearing his jealous thoughts. “Can you give us some privacy?” he asked and the panther sighed. “You do know that she isn't the type of person to replace you? She’s not a hybrid collector” he corrected and Mingi stayed silent as he left.

“They weren’t hybrid collectors either… So why? Why was I the only one punished!” he yelled again and I knew he needed to get this out of him. “I hate you… I wish we weren’t bonded so we didn't have to be stuck with each other!” he yelled and I let out a shaky sigh.

“You know nothing about what I went through–” “Did you ever stop to think, what if I just never told you about what I went through?” I asked and he scoffed. “Like what huh?! She’d favor you always–” “If you haven't eaten for a day Mingi, I didn’t eat for two! If you were locked in a closet I was the one physically punished! You weren't the only one so stop okay!” I yelled... I am now sick of it, pretending I was okay when... just wanted to forget.

“Don’t you ever wonder what’s happening to me when you're locked in the closet? Or how long has it been since I ate, if you were being punished? Why do you think she liked me so much huh? I did everything I could for you… and in the end, you won’t ever care! You’ve always hated me when I always tried my best!” I cried out now.

He looked shocked but he shook his head… “Liar,” he said and I sighed and left the room. I can’t stay here if he really does hate me. I knew he’d regret having her adopt me…

I went through the fridge looking for things I could take that would last me a while.

“Planning on running away?” I heard and I looked behind me to see them all… besides her. I was caught red-handed… “Why are you fighting so much with the overgrown wolf?” Yeosang asked and I sighed.

“He’s always hated me… ever since we were kids. He still thinks he was the only one getting punished but he would get smaller punishments from her” I explained.

“So you took his blame most of the time?” Seonghwa asked and I nodded. “She finds every little thing to blame him and when I finally stood up for him, she said I could take his punishment. So she would starve Mingi and me but then she’d give me the choice. She'd give me one plate of food for a whole week which I'd sneak little bites but gave the rest to Mingi. Or if he was locked away in heat, she would get physical with me” I explained and I couldn’t look at any of them.

“y/n knows… she has the records of your abuse in a file. She was hoping you and Mingi could clear things up” Hongjoong said and I shook my head. I subconsciously fiddled with the collar she gifted me.

“Mingi would never believe me… and I never corrected him. I let him hate me cause it was easier that way. I told him he’d regret me being here… so I’m sorry” I apologized and Wooyoung now got closer to me and opened the fridge.

“If you’re gonna leave you should at least have a good meal” he muttered and I was shocked. “We’re not gonna stop you from doing anything but…we also can’t just let you go without nothing,” Seonghwa said and I noticed San was missing.

“He isn’t gonna tell her…” Yeosang confirmed and I didn’t believe him until I saw him again. “She had some clothes for you to try on that she was planning on giving you eventually,” he said, handing me a trench coat and warmer clothes. Hongjoong also appeared with money… “This should get you around for a week,” he said and I nodded.

“Why?” I asked confused and they shrugged. “You’re really unhappy… you can fool Mingi but everyone else can see how upset you are. Even if she can… she was planning on taking you back or finding someone to adopt you but if you're running away then there's no point” Hongjoong said and I didn’t want to cry in front of them.

“This should be good for you, make sure to eat well” I heard as I saw Wooyoung hand me a lunch box and I couldn’t stop the tears.

“I’m sorry I caused so much trouble”

@wonuangel @danirael @angelsaway @krissroo @minkysmilk @mayonnaise-on-toast @robertsbbygirl @superbbananananana @hyukssunflower @kitty4hwa @justconniez @senpai-of-doom @kibs-and-bits @caityelise99 @ilovekinny @ateezennie23 @wooahaelemons @purplelady85 @watamotee33@chidess97 @littlelostdemonofthelight @maliamaiden @burntarm1n @spooo00oky @eastleighsblog @momo-peachy @kitstar1117 @quartzpirate

@sunnyhokyu @iwishiwasrichasfuck @theginger543210 @pandolinka @ddaeing @kpopnightingale @slid3er @kekdo-520 @puppyminnnie @sparklinghwa222 @calicanbeevil @itsvxlentine @atinism @loumin908 @smally97 @rxnexxi @acetruepunk @majesticbeluga @namjooncrabs @tashizxy @itstheghostofmypast @smilefordongil @teeziny @totallynotlyntv @kyeos4ng @prodsh00ky @acescavern

please don't be a silent reader !! reblog, comment, and like <3

222 notes · View notes

hattedhedgehog · 3 days ago

Text

My year in review

(Only a few weeks late!)

This year was a completely fresh start for me: I put everything I own in storage and went to costume school!

I realised that in my many varied jobs over the years, a consistent source of happiness for me was making costumes for myself and others, and I wanted to get proper training in it so I could do it professionally. Attending Northern College of Costume was a life-changing experience that taught me invaluable skills, opened up new possibilities, and allowed me to meet really passionate and talented people. I'll always be grateful for what I learned there and for the patience and encouragement that was extended to me.

After years of making costumes and learning on my own, it was incredibly energizing to be in a studio with other people who were busy creating too; this excitement continued as I went onwards to theatre workrooms and got immersed in the chaos of bringing stories to life onstage. I absolutely love being a dresser, in addition to being a maker, and it's been amazing to take on both of those roles on various shows this year.

(I was a maker on this one)

(And a dresser on these two)

Also, after years of NDA restrictions I was also able to share my involvement as a consultant in my favourite game franchise ever - Dragon Age - and attend the press event for the launch of Dragon Age: The Veilguard in San Francisco. I never in my wildest dreams would have thought I'd see my name in the credits of a massive game and I'm so proud to have been involved in my small way.

I've been making an effort to keep a sketch diary to record my backstage and travel experiences, to remember everything by in addition to just photos. Burnout for painting had been creeping up on me for a long time and hit HARD this year, which as an illustrator I was embarrassed about, but doodling my life has been keeping me feeling connected to art while I let my passion for it hibernate.

It's been stressful being on-the-go studying and working without a permanent home base, but I'm lucky to be in a position where I can pursue something I'm interested in. I can only hope to grow as much next year as I did this one.

#personal #2024 recap

188 notes · View notes

pm-te · 2 days ago

Text

I simply can't see Silco as a good dad. The entire foundation of his relationship with Jinx is based around how much he can project his unresolved issues with Vander unto her. I mean, he was definitely going to kill her – Felicia's daughter be damned – until she said the magic words that made him think "she just like me fr".

Add into the fact he knew Vi didn't abandon her and that she was spiraling in and out of the idea of what Jinx was supposed to be, all the while he doubled down on how they were always going to be betrayed and alone in the end.

The most interesting thing though, is that it reads as if he was reaffirming his own bullshit to prove he chose the correct path.

Because, just like how Jinx thrives with connections with other people and was deep down hoping for her sister to come back, Silco, for all his talk of ruthlessness, bemoans the lack of camaraderie of the good old days a bit too much.

But here's the thing, when he's dying and says that she's perfect, without any need of conforming to whatever idea of what she should be, we get a glimpse of what he's at his core – of the person who believed in revolution because he cared.

He definitely loved her more than anything, but love doesn't impede you from hurting someone.

if we define “good dad” by genuinely wanting what’s best for your kid, loving and caring for them unconditionally, being patient with them, making them feel valued, giving them the space to express themselves, encouraging their talents, and genuinely trying your best and doing what you think is best for them, then Silco was a good dad.

But if we define “good dad” by actually being able to properly parent and discipline your child, ensuring they aren’t a danger to themselves and others, teaching them healthy life lessons so that they can grow, not projecting your own unresolved trauma onto your child in a codependent way, and being a good role model, then Silco was NOT a good dad.

#and op's previous tags are on point #he was the best dad as someone with his messed up ideology and unresolved issues could be methinks #that still doesn’t mean he was a positive influence tho #but he did what he genuinely thought was best #his best was just AWFUL tho #arcane #arcane silco #silco #jinx #love the guy though he's just so interesting

529 notes · View notes

bvidzsoo · 2 days ago

Text

Every time I see you... (masterlist) ↰

...my throbbing heart rate spikes up

Author: bvidzsoo

Pairing: Song Mingi x female reader

☆ Genre: slice of life, established situationship, post university setting, angst, fluff, smut ☆ Rating: 18+ (mature) ☆ Status: first chapter will be posted on: 30.01.

Summary: You had no issues committing to a relationship, but you've had too much misfortune while dating, so, really, you didn't even want to hear the word relationship. What you had with Mingi, however, was special...it was never said out loud, but to any onlooker, it was obvious what you were: just two people in love. Is that something you can come to terms with? Are you willing to open yourself to the man you've always loved but didn't fully acknowledge until now?

☆ Visuals ☆

︵⭒Chapter 1

︵⭒Chapter 2

︵⭒Chapter 3

︵⭒Chapter 4

︵⭒Chapter 5

︵⭒Chapter 6

︵⭒Chapter 7

︵⭒Chapter 8

🎧Be my little secret, keep it, hush, hush, but I think I'm in love🎧

A/N: Man, I miss writing for my Mingi. IOMT really snatched my wig when it comes to Yunho, can one be bias wrecked by their own bias? Apparently, yes, because that's what happened. I've got this idea not so randomly, for those who know Giselle's solo song Dopamine, it was heavily influenced by it. I adore the song and can relate a lot to it, so here's me word vomiting another story for you guys! I'll start a separate taglist for this mini-series, so let me know on this post if you'd like to be tagged! I hope to see you all soon! ^^ Get ready to read about me gushing about Song Mingi for another eight chapters, yay! divider I hope to update every week, but it might get slower if we catch up with the chapters I have written so far.

↳Perm. taglist: @orshii @jjoongstar @tinyelfperson @thestarskiller @zuuhaa

@aaa-sia @gong-fourz @a-tinycarat @sooberryworld @hopefulrascalstatesmantoad

@anastasiamin860 @yunhogrippers @vcutparis @tunaasan @blvckarabixnvoid

@yusalterego @arigakittyo @slowee00 @jaerisdiction @hey-syia

@vnessalau @oddracha @chatsgotmytongue @potatos-on-clouds @yunhowooyo

@watermelon2319 @yoongzsmile28 @klllerwaifu @apriecotte @hwasbbyg

@kyeos4ng @samiiy20 @woosanhobros @aswho1estuff @khjoongie98

@ateez-main-yapper @kang-ulzzang @felixs-voice-makes-me-wanna @ginger-mingi @redzie02

@unholywriters @autieofthevalley @roomsofangel @peachyy-joonie @baeksofty

@tunafishyfishylike @syubseokie @jycas @fandom-freak-geek @intaksfav

@itswaffleberry @e3ellie @skz1-4-3 @hoe4yunho @kyeomooniee

@winklehwa @eyesonlyformingi @khjssss @torieisawesome99 @amrose8

@faeriehwa @hongjoongsprincess @iceteainsummer @lac3ybow @aurorajoye

@londonbridges01 @hyukssunflower @hwashua-luv @halloweenbyphoebebridgers @soobnez

@vixx00 @princesspearl @mintsugarr93 @m4n4-s4m4 @monbrat

❀ complete the forms if you're interested! ^^

181 notes · View notes

evilmenenjoyer · 1 day ago

Text

Gratitude

Pairing: The Salesman x fem!Reader

SEQUEL to City of Love. Probably not a good fic to read as a stand-alone; read City of Love first for context.

Word count: 5.5k

Warnings: smut (minors dni), dubious consent, rough sex after a fight, degradation, dom/sub dynamics, bruising, marking, pain play/sadomasochism, mirror sex, manhandling, hurt/comfort (but mostly hurt), lots of angst.

Tags: @apookalypse @thecutiepieishere / I do not have an official taglist yet, but I'd be willing to make one if people were interested. If you'd like to be tagged in my fics, or in any additions to this story, let me know somehow!

–––

It's three days later when you see him again, just when you were convinced he left Paris for good.

You knew it would take a lot longer for the reminders of him to leave your mind as well as your body. He's in the marks his hands left on your hips, in the scrapes and faint bruises along your back from when he tossed and squeezed you against the brick wall, in the ghost of his lips on your skin. You can still feel them every time you close your eyes, hear his voice whisper your name against your neck as he came.

It shouldn't surprise you, after everything, to have him knock on your door right as you’re getting ready to have a night out. It still nearly takes your breath away to see him, looking as impeccable as usual in his dark gray suit, smiling as if his mere presence doesn't rock your world upside down a third time.

“What part of ‘don’t ever contact me again’ did you not understand?” you ask, though right away you can tell you don't sound nearly as firm and assertive as you’d like. You wonder if he can tell you hoped, against every rational thought in your brain, that he would come back.

Judging by his smile, you’d bet he can.

“I couldn't help myself,” he responds, raising his hands slightly in mock surrender. “Can I come in?”

That part of you that still clings to rationality, that can tell a good idea apart from a horrible one, lights up like a loud siren in your brain. There's nothing good that could possibly come out of this. Hasn't he toyed with you enough already? With his weird twisted games, tracking you down all the way to a foreign country, sending you off to those horrific games?

Still, you find yourself stepping aside, leaving a gap for him to come through. You’ve never been good at controlling your impulses, after all.

The apartment you’ve been renting for the time being stands in the heart of Paris. It looks exactly what you pictured a typical, glamorous Parisian apartment to look like – high walls, hardwood floors, large arched windows with a stunning view of the city and the Eiffel Tower. It's furnished with all the essentials, and nothing more. You didn't see the need to bring in new furniture or decorations when you didn't even know for how long you’d be staying in the city. At this point, you’re already considering moving on to somewhere else.

“Make yourself at home,” you say. “But I’m going out soon.”

“I see that.” His eyes run over you as he sits at the arm of the couch, shamelessly lingering on the black dress that hugs all your curves at the right spots. “Where are you going?”

“Out.”

You turn your back to him, looking for the earrings you had put down somewhere when you heard the knock on the door. You feel his body heat approach you from behind, his fingertips brushing against a red spot on your shoulder blade that the spaghetti straps of the dress fail to cover.

“Did I do this to you?”

His voice doesn't sound remorseful or apologetic at all. If only, there's a hint of pride to his tone, a small smile at the corner of his lip that you can tell is there without even looking at him. It should upset you, thinking of how roughly he pushed you against that wall, but it has goosebumps blooming all over your skin around the spot he touches.

“Who else would it be?” Your voice shakes ever so slightly against your will, and you clear your throat to get rid of it.

You expect him to pull back, but instead he inches even closer. He has to lean down to mold his chest to your back, his lips brushing the delicate skin of your neck when he speaks. “I can make it up to you.”

“Oh, really?” You turn your head just enough to chase after his lips. Screw the night out. He lets you capture them, indulging you in only a quick kiss before pulling away.

“I’m serious. I have something for you.”

“Oh.” You frown at the loss of contact, turning to face him. “What is it?”

“Close your eyes.”

Your frown deepens, and he raises his eyebrows at you. “Don't you trust me yet?” he asks.

No. Absolutely not. Still, what's the worst that can happen? What would he do while you have your eyes closed that he can't do right now; that he couldn't have done three nights ago at that bar, when you gave yourself to him so willingly?

You close your eyes, with a small sigh as if letting him know it's a nuisance. There's no real heat to it, and you both know it.

The Salesman’s hands find their way to your arms, guiding you further into the apartment. You follow his lead slowly, careful not to bump into any furniture or clutter you left around the place while picking an outfit and getting ready.

“You didn't have to give me a gift,” you say, still confused about what this is about. He stops walking the two of you, leaving you in an unknown part of the apartment. Your heart beats slightly faster than normal; distrustful, but excited. No man has ever bought you a gift before. Gifts are for girlfriends, for women they're trying to impress. Somehow, in all your years on this Earth, you’d missed out on being that woman to anyone.

“I was feeling romantic,” he explains. You feel something cold land over the exposed skin of your neck and chest, and he fiddles with a clasp at the nape of your neck. “Blame it on Paris. You can open your eyes.”

You do so, finding yourself standing in your bedroom, right in front of the large mirror resting against the wall. The necklace stands out against your skin – thin white gold chain and gemstones shining so bright you can immediately tell they're real, a ruby and a sapphire encrusted by tiny crystals. The color choice is an odd one for a necklace, prompting you to take a closer look. That's when any hints of a smile vanish from your face.

The gemstones are placed beside each other, the shapes and markings in them identical to those of the ddakji tiles you and the Salesman had played together in the subway station.

“I had it custom-made for you,” he says. Standing behind you, his reflection on the mirror takes up almost the entire background, but you don't pay him any mind. Your eyes are all but glued to the red and deep blue stones hanging from your neck, hoping against hope that you had seen it all wrong, that this was just a figment of your imagination and the real necklace will reveal itself if you just look hard enough.

It never does.

Reality hits you then. This isn’t some fun new fling, or the beginning of a Paris romance. This is the man who lured you into a horribly traumatic experience when you were at your most vulnerable, who came all the way from Seoul just to rub in your face that you didn't deserve to make it out of there alive. And now here he is. Prying his way into your apartment, your body, your mind. And you just let him.

Horror floods you, nearly pushing you to your knees right here. You touch the pendant with shaky fingers, and it takes everything in you not to grab the chain and yank it off your neck. Finally, your eyes meet the Salesman’s in the mirror.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?”

He blinks innocently. “You don't like it?”

“Why would you do this?” you ask, unsure of whether you want to burst into tears or slap him in the face.

His fingers join yours where they rest on the necklace, only grazing your skin on their way to touching the pendant. “I thought you'd like a reminder.”

That makes you spring into action, pulling away from him and pushing his hand away with a ferocity you didn't know you still had, not since the Squid Games.

“A reminder? What makes you think I want to remember that shit?” You raise your voice; something to make up for how small you feel, by the way you need to tilt your head to look him in the eye. “If I could erase that night from my memory for the rest of my life, I would.”

“I find that hard to believe. Would you erase our night together at the bar as well?” His eyes leave yours only to look back to the mirror behind you. “Look at you. Wearing those bruises so proudly.”

For a moment all you can do is stare at him, unable to believe the sheer audacity he has to stand in your house and say these things. The worst of it all is you can’t fully deny it – you picked the dress deliberately knowing it left the upper part of your back exposed, happy to catch glimpses of the bruises he left you with if you happened to stumble upon a mirror or reflective surface throughout the night.

“I would,” you insist. “What the fuck makes you think I’d want to remember the night that ruined my life?”

A laugh comes out of him; a short, but cruel sound. “I ruined your life, is that what you're saying?”

You scoff. “Don't act like you don't know you did.”

He steps even closer to you. You refuse to step back, even when it feels like his chest is about to bump into your forehead. “Your life,” he says, “was already shit way before I came around. Debt, an awful job, an even worse home, no future prospects, no friends. What exactly was there about your life that was good enough to be ruined?”

Rage consumes you to hear him talk like that about your old life. Things were bad, yes, but there was a positivity about you that's been lost ever since you stepped foot in those games. You could barely make ends meet, and your shifts were long and exhausting, but you had hopes of going to school, of turning your life around. Your home was a tiny, shitty house in an even shittier neighborhood, but you still took the effort to decorate it and try to make it feel more like a home. Where did that go? Now, you have all the money you could ever wish for, and all you do is spend it on clothes and expensive trips you don't even have the motivation to enjoy, your only goal being getting far away from Seoul.

“At least I felt like a fucking person! Do you even know what that’s like? Feeling human?” you all but yell, grateful for the language barrier in case any neighbors happen to be listening. “I’d never killed anyone. I’d never wanted to kill anyone! I didn't have nightmares, and I didn't wake up every day wondering if I deserve to be alive after everything I did to survive!”

“You had nothing,” he reminds you, his voice cold as the winter outside. “Not even your dignity. Or did you forget how we met? How you asked me to play ddakji with you, willing to get hit in the face repeatedly not for money, but just to have my attention?”

You hold back a sob, shaking your head furiously, but it's of no use. The words sting hard enough to bring tears to your eyes; it stings even more to know they're true.

“Get out of my apartment,” you demand. You wish you'd never let him in. You wish you'd never met him at all.

“Things are different now,” he says, ignoring your order completely. “You’re rich, and you’ve matured. You’ll never struggle again in your life, if you're smart.”

“I said GET THE FUCK OUT!”

Finally at your breaking point, you push him, shoving at his chest as hard as you have the strength to. He barely budges. It's only then that you notice how cornered he’s got you, your back about to bump into the mirror.

He brings his hand towards your face, cupping your chin and forcing you to look higher up at him. You thrash and claw at his wrist, trying to push it away from you, but he only tightens his grip until it's almost painful. There’s a darkness in his eyes that’s unlike any expression you’ve ever seen on him.

“I made you stronger. You're a millionaire now because of me,” he says. “How about a little gratitude?”

Even from your position, you still manage an incredulous scoff at him. “Gratitude?”

“Yes.” A grin stretches the corner of his lips, not a trace of warmth of friendliness behind it. “You should be thankful I pulled you out of your misery.”

He moves faster than you’re ready to, grabbing you by the waist and tossing you down. You brace yourself for the impact of your head hitting the floor, gasping in surprise when your back bounces over the soft mattress instead. He hovers above you, using his heavier body to pin yours down before you even have the chance to start struggling against his grip.

“Get off me!”

“Calm down.” He holds both your wrists together with one hand, while the other manages to somehow pull your panties off your body, using your kicking legs as leverage. Your eyes widen in shock. “I’m just giving you another reminder.”

“W-what?” Your voice wavers with fear. All that fury is slowly but surely being replaced with it, or with a mixture of both feelings that leaves you heaving for breath.

He doesn't have to pull your dress up – your own struggle does it by itself, leaving the fabric rumpled up at your hips and your bottom exposed. You stop kicking him in an attempt to cover yourself, and he takes advantage of that fraction of a second to stick his knee on the spot on the mattress between your legs, stopping you from shutting them. You gasp, the heavy pressure on your core cutting off all your thoughts for a moment. You can think of nothing to do other than to yell for help.

As if reading your thoughts, his free hand covers your mouth.

You voice your displeasure through a muffled grunt. You keep on struggling, trying to kick him off you, but each movement unintentionally rubs your bare clit over his thigh that pins you down. He applies even more pressure and you cry out, mortified to feel heat pooling between your legs.

“Christ, you're wet. I can feel it.”

You can feel it too, the fabric of his pants damp and hot where it connects with you. You're torn on whether to keep fighting and essentially humping his leg or giving up, if only to have a few instants of relief.

“If you scream, I’ll slit your throat,” he warns in a hoarse whisper. “Do you understand?”

Out of options, you nod.

He releases your mouth, then your wrists. It occurs to you to scream anyway, but you force yourself to remember who you're dealing with. He wouldn’t give you empty threats. Anyone involved in bringing people into those games has no qualms about slitting your throat open and leaving you to bleed out on your silk sheets.

The Salesman makes his way down your body, now holding onto your legs with his hands.

“What the fuck are you doing?” you manage to ask, the answer rather obvious but it had all happened so fast, leaving you dazed and confused.

“Giving you yet another reason to be thankful to me.”

The sudden, damp feel of his tongue on your entrance overcomes your senses, and you wouldn't be able to hold back a shout if you tried.

Fortunately, he forgives you for it. You squirm under the sensations, but he holds your hips down against the mattress in a firm grip, immobilizing them completely and prying you open all at once. You hoist yourself up over your elbows only to be met with your own reflection on the mirror across the room, your hair a mess already and your face contorted in fear and pleasure and indignation all at once. You can’t bear to watch yourself like this, mortification entrenched into every muscle of your body that reacts to his touch as he continues to penetrate you with his tongue. You fall back towards the mattress with a broken moan.

“God– Y-you can’t–” Whatever you were about to say dies out in your throat as his lips rise to your clit, enveloping you so expertly in the wet heat of his mouth. You clench your whole body, eyelids all the way down to your toes, and for a moment you’re grateful for the hands that hold your legs open just so you don’t have to face the shame of spreading them wider.

Your hands, perfectly capable of putting up a fight once they’d been released, twist into the sheets beneath you, holding on like your life depends on it. You curse yourself for not trying harder to push him off, for not really wanting to; for always being so unwilling to say no to him. Moans leave your lips like they’re being ripped out of you, growing in volume like you just can’t help it. It makes you wish one of the pillows were within reach so you could bury it against your face and muffle them, or simply to hide yourself from how incredibly good it feels to be at his mercy.

It doesn’t take long at all. Say whatever you want about the Salesman, but this is a man who knows what he’s doing with his tongue. In only a few minutes he reduces you to whimpers and pleading, your orgasm hitting you like a wave crashing full-force over the shore. Your back arches off the bed, mouth open in a long moan, and he continues to dine on you like a starving man until the moment you fall backwards, spent.

When you come back to yourself, you’re covering your face with your hands as he presses kisses to the line of your inner thigh. You feel him make his way up your body, feel his hands on your wrists, gently moving them out of the way and exposing your face, the deep flush that has colored your cheeks.

Looking into his eyes, you’re overcome with a rush of emotions you’re not sure how to name. How can a person make you feel so many things at once? How can you still want him – ardently, desperately, profoundly want him – after everything? How can he be so addictive, leaving you already hooked from the scraps of attention he’s given you? You tilt your head just a tiny bit towards him, a silent invitation, and he leans in the rest of the way to take your lips in his.

He kisses you deeply, hungrily, holding you through the shudders that run through your body from the aftershocks of your orgasm until they subside. Kisses you like you’re more than just a hookup, tempting you to believe there must be something about you that’s special. Kisses you for long enough to get you drunk in it, like he’s happy to do nothing but this for the rest of his life.

The next time he pulls back, he removes his suit jacket and tie. You somehow manage to help him unbutton his white shirt, motivated by the promise of feeling his bare skin on yours. You nearly forget his pants are still on, letting him work on that as you press kisses to down his neck. Of course his body is as perfect as his face. He makes an approving sound that you can feel on his throat, and you follow the vibrations of his vocal chords until his pulse point, pleased to find his heartbeats as fast as yours. You can’t resist taking the skin there between your teeth.

He growls, hands tightening on your hips and flipping you on the bed so you’re facing the other side, your back to him. You hold onto the bed frame to steady yourself, body half-bent forward.

You expect him to thrust into you without warning, just as he had the last time. Before that, he brings a hand underneath your chin, tilting your head upwards, your sight landing squarely on your joined reflection on the mirror.

“Keep your eyes right there.” Now he enters you, and you watch your eyes widen at the sudden intrusion. “Watch yourself get fucked on my cock.”

The sheer filth in his voice prompts you to obey, to look. Your knuckles turn white on the bedframe and your body rocks forward with each of his thrusts; slow at first, but steadily gaining power and speed. He reaches down to rub your clit in circles, and it makes your body jerk to feel it and see it at the same time, to watch your reactions in real time. The sight of the necklace still hanging from your neck prompts you to look away, a confirmation of what’s actually happening to you that you’re not prepared to stare in the face.

His hand leaves your clit to wrap itself into your hair, yanking it back. Your body arches to follow it, your reflection on the glass confronting you once again.

“I said look,” he says into your ear. “Don’t you wanna see what a pretty mess you are for me?”

You shake your head, although his death grip on your hair makes it difficult to move. That’s precisely the issue: seeing the mess that he made you into, seeing yourself so overwhelmed and dirty and ashamed, the sounds leaving you suggesting nothing other than aching, raw need. It’s too much. It doesn’t stop you from pushing your hips back to meet his, trying to match his rhythm.

He angles his thrusts to hit a spot inside of you that makes you see stars. “Oh God,” you croak, feeling the heaviness of tears behind your eyes and another orgasm fast approaching.

Just when you’re close, impossibly close to your release, he stops. You watch him on the mirror, panting just for a moment before he pulls out of you and releases your hair. You’re about to protest, or maybe plead for mercy, but he pushes you to lay on your back on the bed again, back inside of you before you can even think of a sentence.

“How about that thank you now?” He pounds into you, somehow even deeper from this position. “Say it.”

“Shut up,” you say instead. The pause, brief as it was, only served to make you more desperate to come, and the last thing you need right now is to hear this. “Please just shut up.”

The necklace gleams over your chest, catching his attention. The Salesman runs a thumb over the sapphire, as if contemplating something, before he presses down on the pendant hard, digging it into your skin.

You gasp, throwing your head back. He’s moving fast enough that the bed rocks underneath you, the headboard slamming into the wall, his fingers still on the necklace like he wants to imprint it into your chest. It fucking hurts, the sharp metal edges unrelenting, digging in hard enough to leave a bruise. It makes your body sing, awakes the deeply-hidden, fucked up parts of you that crave this kind of pain.

“Every time you wake up,” the Salesman says, slightly out of breath himself, but much more composed than you, “and you look out of the window and see Paris, or anywhere that’s not the gutter in Seoul, you thank me for saving you.” He punctuates his words with a particularly hard thrust. “Say it.”

You don’t want to say it. Saying it makes you feel like it’s true, like you should give in and believe what he’s saying. That you are a piece of trash who got lucky, after all, and you should thank him for anything close to success that you achieve from now on. But your orgasm is so close you can feel the force of it numb your ears, your wrists; and in this moment, you would say anything, do anything, so long as he keeps you feeling this good.

“Thank you,” the words are just barely above a whisper, like you wish you could keep them to yourself as a shameful secret.

“For what?”

He gives you another hard thrust, almost painful if only the lines between pain and pleasure hadn’t been blurred a long time ago. You push your chest into an arch, the pendant digging even deeper into you until it breaks skin and the pain turns into agony.

“F-for saving me.”

“Good girl.”

You come then, thinking about the mark that the necklace will leave on you, thinking about how you’re going to feel it for days, how you’re going to remember it every time you feel it or see it. That there will be evidence on your body that he touched you this passionately. It feels like you’re floating, rising to the sky as you clench and unclench around him, as sound after humiliating sound leaves you.

You collapse back against the mattress when your orgasm finally lets you go, boneless and spent. You didn’t see or hear him come – in another situation, it might’ve upset you to miss it, if you weren’t still riding the aftershocks of that incredible high –, but he’s still against you, breathing hard into your neck. His release leaks from between your legs. He stays like that for a long time, slowly softening inside of you, before he finally pulls out and away from you.

You stay right where you are, unmoving. Somewhere far away, you think you can hear him searching for his clothes and dressing himself. You don’t want it to upset you, but it does; because of course he would come here, humiliate you, give you the best fuck of your life and then immediately leave, without so much as a word to you. Your head falls to the side, and even that small movement feels incredibly difficult, like your entire body is a limb that has fallen asleep. Your vision is blurry, far-away, until it finally focuses on the large window that overlooks the city. Tiny snowflakes flutter over the city lights and the dark night sky.

“It’s snowing.”

That pulls his attention to you. He’s got his pants and shirt on, the first few buttons undone, his once perfectly-styled hair a mess. He follows the line of your gaze to the window. “Were you looking forward to it?” he asks.

“Yeah.” It feels like forever ago since the last time you even thought about it. The Salesman was right; the city is beautiful at this time of the year.

You expect him to return to his clothes then head out the door. Instead, he reaches for the covers over the bed and wraps your naked body up in them like a baby. “Ow,” you hiss when he moves you, pain exploding on your chest where the necklace was pressed against you. A few drops of blood dry on your skin from when the skin had split. You feel the Salesman lift you bridal-style, much to your surprise, but you’re still too dazed to find it in you to question it.

He sits you both on the thick windowsill, him behind you and you leaning against his chest, framed by his legs. It’s gentle, somehow more intimate than you’ve ever been with him even after sleeping with him twice. You watch the snowfall outside, mesmerized, letting the steady rise-and-fall of his chest behind you soothe your aching muscles.

It’s the closest to safe you’ve felt in what feels like forever, and you’re crying before you even realize it.

Once it starts, it’s impossible to stop it. Your body trembles with the force of your sobs, tears flowing from your eyes like they haven’t since you were a little kid, at least not this openly. He wraps his arms around you from behind, pulling you flush against himself and pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“It’s okay,” he whispers, keeping his lips right there against your scalp. He rocks you ever so slightly, shushing your cries, the sound as soothing as a soft lullaby. “It’s okay.”

“It’s not,” you sob. You think about the snow in Seoul, about how the first snowfall always made you excited, even when it happened every year. You can feel your tears rolling down your cheeks and into your neck, your collarbones. “I want to go home.”

“Then go home,” he says, like it’s simple.

“I can’t.” How can you walk the same streets you always did, as if your life wasn’t completely changed? As if the price you paid for this change wasn’t much, much greater than you could deal with? “You’re right. I have nothing. No one.”

“You had nothing. You can have anything you want now.” You want to tell him there are things money can’t buy, but you’re so tired, so exhausted. You can’t muster the willpower for much other than wallowing in your own misery, weeping in his arms like a child. “And you have me.”

That only makes you cry harder, shaking your head. “Don’t say shit you don’t mean.”

“Look at me.” He nudges you to turn to him, the angle awkward but it’s so worth it the second he cups your face in both hands, brushing your tears away with his thumbs. “I mean it. Come back to Seoul.” He kisses the corner of your mouth, then your heavy eyelids. “You just need to see things from a different perspective. I can help you.”

He coaxes you to lay back against him, and you do so without protest, burying your face into his chest. For a moment you actually consider it. Dropping the plans you had for a next trip and following him to Seoul, letting him finish corrupting you with whatever twisted worldview he has. Maybe it would be blissful, you think, to see all that violence and bloodshed as a blessing, as something that saved you rather than ruined you. It has to be a trap, or another one of his games. But it doesn’t hurt to dream about it, just a little bit.

Little by little your crying subsides, your breaths returning to normal. He holds you through it all, stroking your hair in a way that’s so tender, so soft, like you’re fragile. Like he cares about you, or even loves you.

You silently wonder if he can love anyone at all, much less someone as broken as you.

With his fingers drawing circles on your scalp, you drift off into a dreamless sleep.

–––

You wake up alone. You’re still naked but on the bed, tucked into your blankets. There’s no confusion over what happened last night, no delusions that your brain would come up with a dream like that. There’s only memories hitting you like a truck, one after the other, and it’s too fucking early for this.

You pull yourself into a sitting position, and you jump at the sight of yourself on the mirror. You barely notice the smudged makeup from last night, your eyes going straight to the star of the show: the angry red spot right on the center of your chest, already turning into a deep purple at the center. You flinch before you even touch it, your hand hanging in the air halfway through like you’ve changed your mind. The necklace finishes it off like the cherry on top of the cake, the pair of precious stones right next to each other like eyes watching you, mocking you.

You button your coat all the way up before you leave the house.

It’s still early enough that the sun has just begun rising, coloring the sky in a bright blue that bleeds into the buildings and streets. There’s probably nothing open right now, but you could really use some coffee. Or a drink. Probably a drink.

You find him at Pont Neuf, watching the river below. There’s no one else around, the city in a rare moment of quiet and peace. He hasn’t spotted you yet, seemingly lost in thought, and it occurs to you that you could sneak up behind him, push him over the edge and just keep on walking. Sever your ties to him forever, and simply keep going like nothing ever happened, bury it along with all the other memories you try so hard to forget.

You don’t do it, but knowing you could brings you a bit of comfort. You lower your head and keep walking in the opposite direction, not sparing him another glance.

#the salesman x reader #salesman x reader #the recruiter x reader #gong yoo x reader #squid game x reader #the salesman x you #salesman smut #my fics #guess who was too lazy to make a cute banner #next time i promise

349 notes · View notes

stalkedandblocked · 3 days ago

Text

camgirl!reader x sevika

tw. reader and sevika are live, regular au (?? i have no idea how to word it 😭) masturbation (reader), strap on, fingering, cunnilingus (giving and receiving), sevika puts you in a headlock, squirting, overstim, sucking the strap

while in college you get a little bored of your mundane life, and with some free time during the night and also in need of some more money you start an only fans account. after growing quite a following you decide to do a raffle to stream with one of your fans to make things more interesting.

a/n: this took so long holy moly. i hope y’all liked this because this is one of my first times writing a full fic <3 like and reblog if ur a real sevika truther :D

with your tripod and camera on your bed infront of you, you moan, “mmmf… im so close,” you arch your back off the bed as you press the vibrator harder onto your clit. you spread your legs wider, giving a show to the camera. “fuck- oh my god,” your hips start bucking and you throw your head back, you moan and cry as your orgasm hits you, the painful feeling of overstimulation comes quickly but you keep the vibrator on your pussy and your whole body trembles through your orgasm. panting like a dog, you finally turn off the vibrator and place it to the side.

you lift your shaky body and sit on your knees in front of the camera, putting your hands in your lap to squeeze your breast together. you start to announce the little idea you had. messages are spammed in the chat, asking for you to chose them, that they’ll even send money for you to choose them, and asking about what you mean by this. you only giggle and say, “it’s just a thought you pervs, i thought it might be fun to chose one of you randomly and see if you’d be interested in streaming with me.”

the chat dies down on the questions and you say a few more words to say goodbye, before ending the stream by blowing them a kiss.

after hopping in the shower and getting yourself clean, you change into some comfy pajamas before making a post on your page.

‘hi to all my fans! i’m so glad you guys were interested in my proposal, if your in the area dm me for a chance to stream with me ;), i can’t wait!’ after pressing send you turn your phone off and head to bed, hoping that hopefully this won’t be a mistake, and that whoever you chose isn’t entirely horrendous looking.

the next day you check your phone, a couple hundred dm’s are in your inbox. most being people from far away asking if they can fly out but you stick to your word, you find one from an account who sent their address. “let’s see what this person has to offer” you think to yourself. you text back and forth before ultimately asking for a photo of them holding some id next to them so you know they’re not lying about their identity.

a while passed before the account responds, there was no indication about who this person might be so your surprised to see a woman, another notifications sends and it’s a photo of her id attached. you look closer at it, her names sevika, she’s quite a bit older than you, but that didn’t bother you. you ponder for a bit, you’ve never had sex with a woman, but was not opposed to the idea. but yes, even thought the photo of herself is a bit awkward, even reminding you of a parents facebook photo which makes you laugh to yourself a bit, she is very attractive. and from what you can see she seems quite muscular.

“alright”, and you send her an address of a restaurant near both of your homes and tell her to meet you there tomorrow and 4pm.

the next day, you put on a simple going out outfit, nothing to make it obvious your meeting a stranger to fuck her, then head out the door. as you walk to the restaurant you feel butterflies, obviously you had only even been with men, but she was, well, very sexy you thought. the idea excited you but also made you nervous.

as you sat at a table and tell the waitress your waiting for somone, another walks into the restaurant. you miss her face but her hair is tied half up and it’s short, a few inches above her shoulder. she’s also is very tall. you gulp, from what you remember that looks like her. she scans the restaurant before you make eye contact. she walks over to you and sits across from you.

“you must be sevika,” you smile, feeling more nervous than you expected to be. when she responds her voice is deep and smooth, her words are almost seductive. compared to your messages and how she talks to you she seems much more ready and nonchalant about this whole situation in real life. everything about her attracts you, “so did you have any ideas of when you’d like to.. ahem” you try to keep your voice down so no one hears and gets any ideas, “..stream”.

sevika is lazily leaning back in her char, legs nudged open a bit. she leans over the table, resting her arms on it, “i’m ready whenever you are.” you have no idea if she meant to make you flustered, or tried to make it sound sexy but her words melt you brain almost. you stand quickly and grab her arm, “let’s do it today, let’s do it now!” you squeal out before your dragging her out of the restaurant.

sevika had driven so she directs you to her car, you drive to your house and you walk up the stair together after she grabs a bag out of the back of her car. your whole body is warm and fuzzy with excitement. “i usually wear some lingerie when i start, as you probably know. would you like some or do you want to start naked?” you ask, grabbing a matching to set to change into.

“naked.” she responds, she watches as you walk to the bathroom to change. you throw a robe out of the bathroom so she can cover herself before you start. you come out in your set, wearing a robe as well. she sits on your bed watching, “let me set up the camera and then we can begin. did you have anything in mind on what we want to do, what we want to follow?”

“i have ideas for later, but let’s not worry about that now.”

you begin the stream, sevika sits naked on your bed, and you take the robe off infront of the camera. sevika places a hand on your hip guiding you to her lap before you crawl over her. each touch feels like sparks, your already soaked and anticipating what’s gonna happen. you grab eachother and start kissing, her tongue runs over your lip and your lips crash against each other. you sit down on her lap and slowly move your hips over her muscular thighs, you moan into her mouth. “that’s a good girl,” she praises, before continuing to kiss you.

she grabs your hips roughly, helping them move back and forth, you arch and moan for her. your chat is going crazy, some even shocked that it’s another woman. she stops your grinding and lifts your hips up a bit before dragging her thick finger up and down your slit. both of you seem like you forgot that your streaming and just enjoy each others bodies. she rubs your clit in circles, making your toes curl. she takes you from on top of her and flips you to face the camera, spreading your legs, the exposing position making you even wetter. she slides your panties to the side so the camera can see your wet cunny, she starts rubbing circles on your clit makes you throw your head back.

she chuckles at you, “don’t make me hold you head up. already so sensitive, huh?” her mocking words make you moan once more, she begins teasing your hole before nudging her index and middle finger into you. her fingers are so thick and long, your already seeing stars, “fuck! yes! right there sevika, oh my god-” you scream out as she adds her ring finger inside. your juices leak all over her lap and hand. your head leans against her and you mewl into her ear, begging to cum. as you finally start to reach your orgasm she pulls out her fingers and slaps your pussy.

“fuck!” you cry out as your body reacts to your ruined orgasm, sevika chuckles. you breathe heavily as sevika manhandles your basically limp body, laying it on the bed, she starts pulling down your panties and the slick dripping between your legs is more visible than ever. you arch your back slightly off the bed and she unclips your bra, she stops what she’s doing and stares at them. you giggle and can’t tell if it’s from embarrassment or because of her expression, like she’s almost captivated. your breasts fall from the bra and lay prettily on display, which sevika quickly takes advantage of and begins to suck at on of your nipples and knead the other. you let at small moans while kisses litter your tits.

she lifts her head up and smirks “are you ready?” she asks, with having no idea what she’s talking about, you eagerly nod. she begins moving her body over yours and places her bare pussy on your face, letting down all her weight, then spreading your legs and burrying her face in your own cunt. your almost shocked by this, she starts teasing the tip of her tongue on your clit, before diving it into your hole, tongue fucking you and hitting all the good spots in your pussy. you moan against her cunt and try to copy her actions. you suck her clit and lap your tongue up and down her pussy, you squeeze around her tongue in response to her moaning. it’s low and vibrates through your whole body. it’s not long before you cum because of the previous teasing she had done earlier. you squeeze your legs around her head and buck up, trying to keep up the pace with how your lapping her pussy, but inevitably struggle from how your body is shaking against her face.

sevika places one last sloppy kiss to your clit then raises herself, and grinds against your face until she orgasms, gripping onto your hair. the moans she lets out makes your pussy ache.

while coming down form your high you lay next to each other panting, forgetting about the stream itself. “you okay, baby?” sevika asks, places kisses on your neck. “mhm,” you mumble, relaxing into the bed as she kisses you. “well, i think it’s time for what i had planned for earlier”, she gets up and disappears off camera. across the room she pulls something out of her bag that she had grabbed earlier. she begins to attach something to her hips, and before you know it she’s standing over you with a strap on.

it’s so thick and long, you gulp. not even with any men had you had to take something for big. “i know your wet enough but, i don’t think this is” sevika lets out a sly smile. her height already towers over you, so even standing and you sitting in the bed has you face to face with it. “suck it.” she orders and obediently you do. you place your hands around it, looking up at her with puppy dog eyes, and slowly thrust your mouth down onto it. she stares down at you and bites her lip. you bob your head up and down, slowly reaching down with each thrust, your throat adjusts around it and you gag against it and sevika laughs. she places one hand on your head to tug at your hair. once you finally reach down the base she holds your head down. the length makes your eyes tear up as you gag even more.

she pulls your hair back until your off of it and pushes you down to the bed. still grasping your hair she puts your face down into the pillows and keeps your ass up before crawling over you. she has your face infront of the camera and wraps her arm around you. her thick biceps flex as she grabs the strap to line it up at your cunt. she wastes no time pushing it in, when she bottoms out your eyes roll back and without even moving it feels almost heavenly. she starts thrusting slowly before they become almost rapid, her arm squeezes around your throat even more and you moan and gasp. “taking it like such a good little slut,” she purred. you let out a messy smile and your moans just couldn’t stop coming out. they way it felt against your g-spot and pounded into you made your toes curl.

“se-sevika!” you drooled, “i’m gonna cum, please! hah, keep going!” you screamed, sevika took no time and started pounding into you more, her free arm rubbing your clit, fast circles against the puffy aching bud. your body shook and your eyes rolled back into your head, sevika thought they might never go back. you cried out before you finally squirted all over yourself and the bed, the liquid covering your stomach, the sheets and sevikas hand. “holy shit” sevika gasped at the reaction to your orgasm. your whole body was stiff and shaking, your mouth tried to let out moans but nothing came out as your eyes rolled back as hard as they could. your body went limp onto the bed, sevika pulled out of you, a line of slick breaking as the contact broke. you whined at the sudden emptiness.

she grabs the camera and faces it towards you, she spreads your weak legs showing the amount of cum that had leaked from your hole and everything that had dripped onto the sheets and between your thighs. “took it like the good slut she is,” she grabbed a handful of your ass and let out a laugh before she abruptly ended the stream.

she threw the camera onto the bed carelessly, then asked, “so, want to meet again next week?”

#sevika arcane smut #sevika smut #sevika arcane x reader #sevika arcane x you #sevika x reader #sevika x you #arcane x reader #arcane smut #sevika x y/n #sevika arcane x y/n #sevika arcane #x reader #arcane x you #arcane x y/n

378 notes · View notes

jamgrlsblog · 2 days ago

Text

I also have a comment on this which is children’s media is made by adults. Adults who are telling stories they find interesting or important and crafting them in a way that can speak to children (and often adults on a different plane). People act like writing for children or teens is easier or that the stories are simpler and that is the most insane take to me because yeah of course I can speak to other 30-something-year olds in a way they will understand, but how do I speak to 14-year olds? How do I take children and teens seriously as an audience and tell them stories they deserve, because they are not stupid, and meet them where they are because they feel and see the world differently than I do, and maybe it’s how I felt back then and maybe it isn’t because the world changes? Loving children’s media is not about being too immature to enjoy media for adults, it’s about being amazed by the stories other adults are telling which can be appreciated differently by different ages (how complex is that!) and maybe it’s also about the whimsy and the fantasy and the hope that we have societally decided is too naive for grownups. (I really would not mind seeing more of that whimsy in adult media; where is it?? But I digress.) I think it is totally fine if you are an adult who has no interest in any of that, but to claim superiority because of it is just plain silly.

I really have no patience for posts talking about "adults who only watch kids' cartoons," because, like...people accuse me of "only watching kids' cartoons," despite all evidence to the contrary. It doesn't matter how much I talk about other adult media I like, if I post too many things in a row about Steven Universe or The Dragon Prince or The Owl House, people come out of the goddamn woodwork to accuse me of "only watching kids' shows."

So I really can't take people seriously when they start talking about the supposed "problem" of "adults who only watch kids' shows." Are the "adults who only watch kids' cartoons" in the room with us right now, or are you basing your entire opinion of people solely on their fandom blog? Like, come on.

It makes me think of the couple years I spent volunteering in a school library. The librarian talked a lot about how it's hurtful to enforce "reading at grade-level" on every student with no nuance. Teachers would try to force their students to check out books "at proper grade-level," instead of letting students pick out whatever they wanted (even if it was "too easy"), and it resulted in a lot of students deciding books were boring, too hard, and only good for making them feel stupid. They started to hate reading entirely, because people constantly shut them down and told them they were stupid for not reading the right things. This was especially brutal on disabled students.

I personally apply the same philosophy to adults. You don't know what someone might struggle with, you don't know what someone's history is. You might think a piece of media is "too simple," but that's your experience and your opinion. People learn and grow and experience the world at different paces, and what seems to you like a "simplistic" piece of media may be the most complex, illuminating piece of media someone else has ever had the opportunity to experience. It doesn't make them "stupid" or "childish," and believing that it does is cruel and counterproductive. You cannot wield shame as a fucking cudgel if your goal is education, support, and helping people expand their horizons.

I don't think a culture of shame is helpful. I don't think a culture of "if you like 'childish' things, it means you're too stupid for anything else" is helpful. I don't think constantly making fun of children's media does anything other than demean people--and not just the people who enjoy it, but the people who make it, too.

#I literally think about how smart the writers are when I watch the kids shows si think are well written #like wow what a smart way to address this issue in a way that would make sense to kids #and wow look at the layers here #the subtext!!!!#writing #media

2K notes · View notes

coqhee · 2 days ago

Text

HATE NISHIMURA !

IN WHICH ✷ prepping for the school's annual charity event, but with your #1 public enemy ∘ ∘ ∘ more

enemy riki x f!r ― one-sided e2l comedy angst(if you squint) fluff comedy cursing kissing menace!riki ⨯ 6334

em's note ★ this was supposed to be for riki's bday back in dec but I just never got around to proof reading, so theres' a lot of christmasy related themes,, hope its still fun n readable lawl. no joke it took so long to write cause when I was editing I kept adding scene after scene with more detail

it was hard being the class president, filing papers, being every single teacher’s errand runner, and always taking the beating when your class was just being so dumb. though, it wasn’t all bad. you enjoyed planning the school events, and having this sort of responsibility.

this winter, you were planning your school’s annual winter charity drive, your goal was to surpass any other year.

every single school year, your school has fallen way behind their set goal, it was like people had no christmas spirit of giving. you had your mind set to change that.

and what was better than having a little bit of help. when the school admins had notified you saying that you’d have a student ambassador voted by the student body to help you out and co-lead, you were elated.

until you found out, it was none other than nishimura riki.

you hated the way nishimura riki smirked whenever you scolded him for skipping class.

you hated the way he’d talk back to teachers.

you hated the way he laughed during truth or dare in 7th grade when someone else revealed your crush on him and he laughed.

you hated nishimura riki.

─── ♡

you were filing papers in the copy room when a tall figure loomed behind you.

“hey pres, when do we get started,” riki’s voice rang through your ears, startling you. you turned around, glaring at the boy, then went back to filing and stapling.

“you sure you’re not here to be a pain in my ass?” you questioned back with venom in your tone. some part of you wishes you were a little more shameful talking back to another student in front of the other teachers in the room, but you couldn’t find it in you to hold back.

the other teachers in the room exchanged amused glances but stayed quiet, clearly entertained by the exchange. riki had that effect on people—effortlessly charming, even when he was being an absolute menace.

“who says i can’t do both?” he grins back

you sighed, setting the papers down with a little more force than necessary. “look, nishimura, if you’re here to joke around, the door’s that way.” you nodded toward the exit. “i have actual work to do.”

“oh, come on, y/n,” he said, leaning casually against the filing cabinet, his grin unwavering. “you act like you don’t secretly love having me around.”

“yeah and i’d love if you could’ve read the email i sent a week ago with what i need to have done before today,” you rolled your eyes, giving a mock smile to the boy.

riki feigned a look of guilt, his hand flying to his chest. “ah, so that’s why you’re mad. you’re holding a grudge because I didn’t read your essay-length email?”

you crossed your arms, fixing him with a pointed stare. “it wasn’t an essay. it was three bullet points, nishimura. three. and if you had bothered to read it, we wouldn’t be behind schedule. i gave you a week of prep and we are running so far behind with vendors and financing.”

he shrugged, the grin never leaving his face. “guess I like living on the edge. keeps life interesting.”

“you know what’s really interesting?” you shot back, grabbing a stack of papers and thrusting them into his hands. “you doing your job for once. congratulations, you’ve been promoted to my assistant for the day.”

“not even co-pres,” he sighed, hoping to annoy you further, lucky for him, it did.

it only took a moment of fidgeting for riki to figure out how to use the copy machine, and while it was a simple thing, god you hated how he already found a more efficient method than what you were doing within 5 minutes.

“impressed yet?” riki smirked, glancing at you as the copier whirred to life. “i think i’m a natural. maybe you should consider me for co-president after all.”

you rolled your eyes but couldn’t deny the pang of annoyance—and grudging admiration—that flared up. “don’t get too comfortable, nishimura. one productive moment doesn’t erase a weeks worth of slacking.”

“ah, but it’s a start,” he said, stacking the freshly printed papers with a flourish. “besides, you need me. who else is gonna keep you from working yourself into an early grave?”

“i don’t need you,” you retorted, grabbing a paper clip and aggressively fastening a stack together. “i just tolerate you because i don’t have a choice, the school admin assigned someone from the student body to help, and it just so happens the student body thinks you’re oh so funny.”

“tolerate, huh?” he leaned in, his voice dropping to that infuriatingly confident tone that always got under your skin. “clearly, it’s more if you trust me to copy fliers for..” he looks down at what he’s been copying all along.

“‘Jinglin Bucks for Joy’ Holiday Auction” he trails off with a look of disgust.

“who named this charity auction?” he spewed out pure critique from his tone.

you rolled your eyes, snatching the top sheet from the stack in his hands. “does it matter who named it? it’s for a good cause. not everything needs your approval, riki.”

“oh, come on,” he said, leaning against the copy machine with an exaggerated pout. “you have to admit it’s a little... cringy. ‘Jinglin’ Bucks for Joy’?”

“it’s festive,” you countered, defending the name despite secretly agreeing it could’ve been better. “and unlike you, the rest of us are focused on making sure this event actually raises money instead of nitpicking the title.”

“just saying, i think you could be earning a lot more if you didn't have that as a name,” he put his hands up at your accusatory tone.

“well, too bad that’s what it is,”

“anyways, i’m done copying these, and i’d say i did a pretty damn good job,” he smugly said waving around the last stack of copied papers in his hand.

“congratulations,” you said dryly, grabbing the packet from him. “you’re officially the MVP of the copy room. want a medal or something?”

“actually, i was thinking more like dinner,” he said casually, tossing the suggestion out like it was no big deal.

your hand froze mid-motion, the papers suddenly feeling heavier than they should. “dinner?”

he shrugged, a playful grin still plastered on his face, but there was something softer in his eyes. “just to celebrate our hard work, of course. unless you’re scared i might make it fun.”

“you wish,” you muttered, turning away to hide the blush creeping up your neck. “finish your stack first, and then we’ll talk.”

he laughed, the sound warm and light. “deal. but don’t keep me waiting too long, pres.”

─── ♡

for the longest time ever, nishimrua riki could not figure out why you hated him so much. every glaring look you gave him when he greeted you.

every sarcastic comment you threw his way—none of it made sense to him. sure, he liked to tease you, but he teased everyone. with you, though, it felt personal, like there was an invisible barrier between you two that he couldn’t break through no matter how hard he tried.

he wasn’t even sure when you had started hating him, let alone why.

back in 6th grade when you were classmates and he swears thats the last time you’ve ever been nice to him in like, the history of ever.

riki racked his brain, replaying every interaction the two of you had since sixth grade. back then, you’d actually smiled at him, even laughed at his dumb jokes about the teacher’s weird handwriting.

he even thought you were cute and might’ve been developing a crush at the time. that’s an understatement though.

actually, riki had been obsessed with you in sixth grade. the kind of crush that made him extra careful not to look like an idiot when you were around. he remembered trying to impress you during gym class, running just a little faster during laps or kicking the soccer ball a little harder, even if it meant face planting into the ground one too many times.

he was convinced that if he ever had the chance to tell you how he felt, you’d smile at him and say you liked him back and you’d live happily ever after. childish, sure, but he was a sixth grader—what did he know about anything?

now that you and him were finally working together on the school’s lame, and failing charity event, he was determined more than ever to get to the bottom of why you hated him so, so bad.

and of course, it starts with dinner.

that, being the $6 after hours discount sushi at your grocery store. okay, so maybe it wasn’t the best dinner imaginable, but with riki’s limited budget and even more limited time, it was the best he could do on short notice. plus, he was convinced sushi was a universal icebreaker—who could resist a good spicy salmon roll with day-old rice and browning avocado?

no wonder it was $6.

“dinner,” you deadpanned, staring at the plastic containers he held out. “this is your grand idea to fix whatever this disaster of a charity event is?”

“no,” he grinned, plopping the containers onto the nearest desk and pulling up a chair. “this is my grand idea to get you to talk to me without biting my head off.”

you raised a brow, unimpressed. “and why would i do that?”

“because,” he started, peeling the lid off a tray of salmon rolls, “you’ve gotta eat, and i’m not leaving until we clear the air.”

you rolled your eyes. there was no way you were going to be talking about your issues with riki. “i’m not talking about my issues with you, we’re gonna be talking plans for the charity event,”

riki sighed dramatically, picking up a piece of sushi with his chopsticks. “fine, fine, charity event it is. but I’m warning you, my feelings might get hurt if you keep ignoring me.”

“oh, cry me a river,” you muttered, flipping open your notebook and pulling out a list of tasks. “we need to finalize the vendor approvals, confirm the auction items, and—”

“kinda cold out no?” he asked absent mindedly looking at his phone. you groaned in disapproval, how many more reasons could he give you for hating him?

“can you focus for 2 seconds nishimura?” you questioned with annoying radiating strongly from your tone. “you’re the reason we’re behind right now, and we need to get a move on, except no, you’re on your phone, and get to take credit for the work, i’m doing,”

riki slowly put his phone down, his lips twitching like he was holding back a laugh. “you done, boss?”

“no, i’m not done,” you snapped, glaring at him. “you’re insufferable, nishimura. do you even care about this event?”

he leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms with an easy smirk. “of course i care. i’m here, aren’t i?”

“barely,” you shot back, flipping through your notebook aggressively. “you’re here, but you’re not actually helping. if you cared even a little, you’d—”

“relax,” he interrupted, his tone unusually calm. “you’re gonna give yourself a stress headache. i already checked in with the admins about the vendors, they’re all approved, and i sorted through part of the auction items already,”

you were skeptical to say the least, unsure of the quality of work riki would put in. he turned his phone around and handed it to you, letting you look through all the documents and files he’d pulled up.

you scanned the screen, flipping through the emails and spreadsheets he’d meticulously organized. it was... surprising. everything looked in order, maybe even more thorough than what you’d expected.

“don’t stress yourself out, kay? i’ve can handle stuff too. that’s why they put two of us up to this,”

you narrowed your eyes at him, still not entirely convinced. “you’re way too relaxed about this. it’s weird. are you trying to mess with me?”

“y/n,” he put his hand around your wrist forcing you to set your chopsticks down for a second, “put some faith into me, let me help,”

you hesitated, staring at where his hand rested lightly on your wrist. his touch wasn’t overbearing, just steady enough to get your attention. his words lingered in the air longer than you cared to admit.

“fine,” you muttered, pulling your hand back and avoiding his gaze. “but if you screw this up, it’s on you.”

─── ♡

one week had gone by since nishimura riki had started being useful. you were surprised with the quality of work he put into the project, not ever once worrying about any finance emails as he was quick to take care of it.

not only that, but he had started showing up to your study sessions, popping by with snacks or making sure you were eating at least once a day.

it was… weird to say the least. you couldn’t say you didn’t like it though. it felt nice to not be entirely alone, worrying about yourself and everyone else constantly.

riki even brought coffee to your early morning meetings with the district board, handing it to you with a teasing smirk, "you looked like you were about to fall asleep in your notes, so I thought I'd help."

you tried not to smile too much at the gesture, but it was hard to ignore the small spark of fondness that began to grow inside you. his thoughtfulness was... unexpected, especially given how much you had believed him to be nothing more than a lazy troublemaker.

you kept trying to find reason after reason to nitpick at riki, yet none came up. you could’ve sworn it was easier to find so much fault in everything he’d do before you had started working together, but all of a sudden they’ve faded.

at first, it had been so easy to be irritated by him. the way he’d walk into a room like he owned it, his stupid grin that seemed to always be a little too smug, the way he’d talk as if everything was a joke.

you'd spent years loathing his presence, convinced he was just some annoying, carefree guy who only cared about himself and was out to make your life more difficult. that’s what you’d told yourself. that’s what you believed.

but now? now, it was different. working side by side on the charity event, you began to notice things you’d never seen before. the way he cared about the details. the way he would take over when you got overwhelmed, quietly working to fix things before you could even ask for help. the way he showed up on time every day, doing everything he could to make sure things ran smoothly.

it was... disorienting, to say the least.

it was late one evening, the two of you sprawled across the desks, working on the final details of the charity event.

"you’re the only one who would still be working at this hour," riki said, leaning back in his chair and watching you from across the room. his gaze softened for a moment, but you didn't notice. you were too busy finishing a set of final emails. "can I help with anything else?" he asked casually, but you could hear the underlying sincerity in his voice.

“guess you can take a break you bum, go grab a snack from the vending machine or something, grab me a sprite while you’re at it,” you say, digging out a $5 bill from your pocket and holding it out behind you, while focused on the screen in front of you.

he raised an eyebrow, but there was no hesitation as he stood up and took a step toward the door. "i got it," he said with a grin, slipping the bill back into your hand before you could protest. "this one’s on me."

a few minutes later, riki returns, the sound of the vending machine bag crinkling in his hands. he places a can of sprite on the corner of your desk with a flourish. "your highness," he says dramatically, "your drink, as requested."

“mm thanks,” you hum, cracking open the can and taking a sip out of the cold refreshing drink, the fizz laying dormant on your tongue.

“you don’t need to keep doing all this nice stuff to win me over, just cause we’re working on the auction, you know that right?” you comment after taking another sip.

“ah, so I’m starting to win you over,” riki grinned, a playful glint in his eyes. “told you I’d be useful.”

you rolled your eyes, but your lips were tugging into a small smile. "don’t get ahead of yourself, nishimura," you muttered, though it was clear you were no longer bothered. in fact, you kind of... liked having him around.

you didn’t hate nishimura riki.

─── ♡

the day before the auction rolls around faster than you thought it would.

while you and riki should be meeting with the vendors in person and getting other important work done, the two of you found yourselves putting up the last batch of fliers for the event, your hands full of paper and tape.

“ugh, why do we have to be the ones doing this?” you muttered, sticking another flier to the wall, your fingers lightly brushing against the cool surface. "we should be overseeing the auction, not putting up fliers like we're in charge of the school play's promo team."

riki chuckled from beside you, holding a stack of fliers in his hand as he adjusted his baseball cap. "hey, someone’s gotta do it. besides, you’re the one who wanted these ridiculous posters," he teased, pointing at the flyer in your hand, which featured a picture of a reindeer in a santa hat with overly saturated colors.

“i’ll have you know, these posters are actually art,” you shot back with a grin, tapping the paper to the wall a little more forcefully than necessary. “besides, i’d like to think they’re festive.”

“sure, sure,” riki said, his grin spreading wider as he glanced at the flier you were working on. “if by festive you mean blinding.”

you laughed, feeling a warmth spread through you. riki’s teasing had become a lot easier to tolerate, maybe even fun. he was good at making you laugh, something you never thought he could do before.

the playful banter you’d shared over the past week was slowly chipping away at the character of riki you’d spent years building up in your mind.

“you tryna go out and get hot chocolate after we wrap this up?” he asked, cocking his head gauging your reaction.

“in this weather?” you asked, glancing outside where the wind whipped against the window and the sky was an icy gray. “are you out of your mind?”

“maybe,” he grinned. “but hot chocolate makes everything better, right?”

you couldn’t help the smile that tugged at your lips. riki was right, in his own annoying way. hot chocolate did sound nice, especially on a day like today. the thought of sitting down somewhere, just the two of you, without the weight of the charity event hanging over you... it felt strangely appealing.

“fine,” you sighed, rolling your eyes dramatically. “but if you make me walk to the corner shop in this cold, i'm blaming you.”

“deal,” he said, not missing a beat. “we’ll take my car.”

he flashed a grin at you, and for a second, you almost felt like it wasn’t just about the hot chocolate. there was something more in his eyes, something that made the conversation feel different, lighter, almost... comforting.

you quickly pushed that thought aside. no, you weren’t about to go down that path. but you couldn’t deny that riki was making it harder to keep your walls up. every little interaction, every small smile, made you rethink the way you’d viewed him for years.

it was as if the years of tension, of seeing him as nothing more than an annoying, reckless guy, were slowly fading into something else.

yet, in the back of your mind, that old familiar voice crept in—the one that told you to be careful, to guard your heart because you knew exactly what happened when you let your guard down.

you’d been there before. back in seventh grade, when you’d caught feelings for him and let yourself believe maybe—just maybe—he could feel the same. but that was before the truth or dare game, before he laughed it off like it was a joke, like it was nothing worth taking seriously.

he’d been so carefree, so effortlessly charming in front of everyone, and you’d been so embarrassed. you’d sworn to yourself you’d never let yourself fall for him again.

and yet, here you were. laughing with him, sharing these moments like you were the closest of friends. it was easy to forget the hurt, easy to ignore the part of you that still flinched at the memory of his laughter.

you wanted to be able to move past though, and believe he wouldn’t be the same boy who’d laugh if you told him you liked him

he stood up, pulling his jacket on and offering you a hand as if he had all the time in the world. “you ready?”

you hesitated for a moment, then grabbed your own coat and stood up. “mhm, yeah.”

“you won’t regret it,” he said with that same confident grin, and for the first time in a long time, you believed him.

you shook your head, trying to push those thoughts away. there was no way he would do that to you again, right? no, he’d changed. he had to have changed.

but even as you smiled back at him, as the two of you walked out into the cold night together, the doubt gnawed at you like a constant shadow, just waiting for the perfect moment to remind you of all the reasons you had to keep your distance.

─── ♡

nishimura riki could feel himself falling. again. though it’s not like actually every fell out liking you to begin with.

and now, as he sat across from you, trying to figure out how to navigate this new territory—where the walls you’d built between you were finally starting to crumble—he couldn’t help but feel that same pull toward you, that same feeling of wanting to be close.

he felt himself feel like he was back in middle school with you all over again.

then it hit him what had gone wrong, and he knew he had to set the record straight.

“so... seventh grade,” he started, turning back to you, handing you your cup.

you froze mid-sip, the mention of that year, let alone night, sending a jolt of embarrassment through you. “what about it?”

he set his chopsticks down, his expression unusually serious. “is that when you started hating me?”

you scoffed, crossing your arms as the words slipped out before you could stop them. “sure.”

you felt your walls building back up, stronger this time, higher than before. that night had been the catalyst for everything that followed—your reason for hating nishimura riki.

riki watched you carefully, his eyes softening. there was no sign of mockery in his gaze, no hint of teasing—just the same quiet sincerity you had seen over the past few weeks. but you weren’t sure you could let yourself fall for it again.

“i’m serious,” he said quietly, his voice lacking the usual playful edge. “was it really that night? or... was it just easier to keep hating me after?”

your chest tightened at his words, a mixture of frustration and confusion swirling within you. “i don’t want to talk about it,” you muttered, finally meeting his gaze. you couldn’t read the expression on his face, but it only made you more anxious.

“if it brings you any peace of mind, i laughed because i liked you, okay?” the words tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them, and his cheeks flushed pink. “i liked you, and you blurting out that you had a crush on me... it threw me off.”

your jaw dropped, the confession catching you completely off guard.

“you... what?”

“i liked you,” he repeated, quieter this time, his gaze dropping to the table. “but i handled it like an idiot, and i’m sorry. i should’ve stood up for you, if you wanna keep hating me, go ahead.”

“i’m sorry for holding it against you all this time,” you mumbled.

riki didn’t look up at you immediately, but you could see the tension in his shoulders ease just a little. you had no idea what to say after that. the words you’d carried with you for so long—the reasons you hated him, the reasons you pushed him away—suddenly felt like nothing more than old wounds that had started to heal on their own, without you realizing it.

you sat in silence for a moment, both of you unsure how to move forward. it was almost as if the confession had left you both vulnerable, unprotected.

“you really liked me?” you asked, half laughing at how ridiculous it sounded now that it was out in the open.

riki’s eyes flickered with an unreadable emotion, and he shrugged, the teasing tone returning to his voice. “yeah. shocking, right?”

the playful comment was like a breath of fresh air, and for a second, the tension between you both was broken. but you couldn’t ignore the way your heart was racing, the fluttering feeling you hadn’t experienced in so long.

“i think, i like you too nishimura,”

“good, keep it that way,” he smiled, reaching out his free hand not surrounding his cup to clasp yours.

you felt your heart skip a beat at the sincerity in his eyes. "you know, you’ve actually been pretty decent lately," you said with a teasing smile, hoping to lighten the moment a bit. "maybe you’ve actually grown up, or maybe i have"

me chuckled, leaning back in his chair, but his hand remained near yours, his fingers lightly grazing the back of your hand. "maybe I have. but I’m still the same guy who likes you. just... trying to be better about it."

you bit your lip, your smile softening as you took in his words. for once, you didn’t feel like you had to keep your guard up. "i think I like this version of you."

"good," riki said, his voice barely above a whisper. "because this version of me likes you too."

a silence fell upon the two of you as you took in the atmosphere around you, looking around awkwardly.

“well,” you said after a beat, not sure where this was headed, but feeling oddly at ease. “you really know how to make things awkward.”

riki grinned, the corners of his lips curling into that familiar mischievous smile. “you’re the one who’s been holding a grudge for, what—years?”

“rightfully so, you’re the one who laughed. you’re lucky the student body voted you to work on the auction with me,” you shot back, the edge of your tone softening just a bit. It was hard to keep being mad when he was being so... well, riki.

“hey, don’t act like you could’ve done this with anyone else,” he teased, nudging your arm lightly with his own. “i mean, look at us. we’ve made a pretty good team, right?”

you rolled your eyes, but a smile tugged at your lips despite yourself. "yeah, a pretty good team that almost got yelled at and kicked off the project because you were too busy texting during the planning meetings."

“hey, i was checking in with the vendors,” he said defensively, holding his hands up in mock surrender. “i’m a multitasker.”

“you mean you’re just a distraction,” you replied, your voice laced with playful sarcasm.

“uh huh,” he rolled his eyes, grinning afterwards.

─── ♡

the day of the auction soon came and you found yourself getting ready with a hopeful mind of what was to come.

the last few weeks of you and riki’s hard work would finally be tested, and hopefully you could bring back some holiday cheer for charity, though a layer of uncertainty was still in your mind.

as you stood in front of the mirror, adjusting your dress, you couldn’t help but feel a little more at ease than usual. the nerves had faded, replaced with something lighter. maybe it was the fact that you and riki had finally talked things out, or maybe it was just the comfort of knowing you weren’t doing this alone anymore. you still didn’t have everything figured out between the two of you, but for the first time, it felt like you were both on the same page.

you met riki backstage before the event started. his hair was perfectly styled, and the suit he wore fit him just right. there was something about him in that moment—calm, collected, yet still as mischievous as ever—that made your heart do a little flip.

“you look good,” you said, trying to sound casual, though there was a softness to your voice that you couldn’t hide.

riki turned to you with a teasing grin, but his eyes softened when he took you in. “you look amazing,” he said, the sincerity in his tone making you feel a little shy. “i mean it.”

your heart skipped, and you brushed your hair back, trying to play it off. “well, don’t get used to it. you’re the one who’s been doing most of the work,” you joked, nudging his arm playfully.

“true, true,” he agreed, a smile tugging at his lips as he adjusted his cufflinks. “but you’ve been the brains behind it. i’m just the pretty face.”

you rolled your eyes but couldn’t suppress the small smile creeping up on your face. “right, the ‘pretty face’ who kept texting during all the important meetings.”

he chuckled, the sound light and easy. “hey, it was multitasking. get it right.”

before you could respond, someone called your names, signaling that the event was about to start. riki offered you his arm with a grin, the moment feeling a little more like a date than anything else.

as you walked into the venue together, the lights dimmed, and the guests filled the room. the auction was about to begin, but in the chaos of people and students gathering around and the rush of excitement, you found yourself standing next to riki, feeling surprisingly calm.

“you ready for this?” he asked, his voice low, just for you.

you gave a small nod. “i think so. let’s just hope we don’t screw anything up.”

he grinned, his hand brushing yours briefly. “even if we do, we’ve got each other’s backs.”

you took your seat in the front row with your bid paddle in hand as you watched riki announce each item.

the first few items went smoothly, and you found yourself glancing over at riki every now and then, catching his eye, and feeling his radiating confidence.

you glanced back at the screen over and over, watching the donation reach close to the school goal of $2000, feeling hopeful you might actually hit it for once.

the auction had been a smooth ride so far, with everything going according to plan. the excitement in the air was palpable, and you could feel the buzz of anticipation from both the audience and the team behind the scenes. each item was going for more than expected, and the donations were rolling in steadily. everything was shaping up to be a success.

then came the final item.

riki stepped up to the microphone, his usual teasing grin plastered on his face. “alright, folks,” he began, his voice smooth and confident, “we’ve got one last item up for grabs. it’s the grand finale, the cherry on top of this entire event. it’s... a date with yours truly.” a cocky smile formed on his face, as he nodded smugly, pointing to himself.

you froze, the surprise hitting you a second too late. the audience erupted into laughter and applause, but you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at riki’s ridiculousness. he gave a mock bow, and the laughter grew louder.

“that’s right, ladies and even gents,” he continued, his eyes scanning the crowd. “you get to spend an evening with the one and only nishimura riki. dinner, a walk in the park, maybe even a movie if you're lucky. the best date of your life. no need to thank me.” he shrugged, clearly enjoying himself.

you couldn’t help but chuckle, shaking your head. “seriously, riki?” you mouthed towards him watching as he smiled smugly back.

“alright we’re starting this bid at $1, any takers?” his eyes scanned the crowd jokingly as he continued on, watching as people egged each other on to bid.

but before you could stop yourself, you found your hand reaching for your bid paddle. your eyes flickered to riki, who was watching you with an amused expression.

“come on, y/n,” he teased, “you know you want to.”

you hesitated for a moment, but the playful glint in his eyes, the way he looked at you as if daring you to do it, pushed you forward. with a mischievous grin of your own, you raised your paddle, calling out “$100!” with a cheerful smile.

the crowd’s reaction was instantaneous—there were gasps, followed by bursts of laughter, as the bid sheet was raised for all to see. the final bid was noticeably higher than the previous ones, and you could feel your face flush with the attention.

“going once, going twice, and sold!” he announced, slamming the gavel with a strong bang.

“well, well,” riki said, stepping back to to take the microphone from the stand to hand it to you, his expression one of mock shock. “looks like someone’s feeling bold tonight. looks like y/n just won a date with me, someone’s got a crush, i don’t blame her.”

you shot him a look, trying to keep your cool. “you better be prepared, riki,” you said, your voice just loud enough for the mic to catch as he handed you the mic to give your statement.

he raised an eyebrow, looking both impressed and slightly nervous. “oh, it’s on. and just like that lady and gents, we just hit our goal too,” he added, glancing at the screen where the total amount had just surpassed the $2000 mark.

the room erupted into applause, and you felt a mix of satisfaction and embarrassment settle over you. riki’s grin softened into something a little more sincere.

as the applause continued and the event slowly came to a close, you found yourself standing beside riki, the noise of the crowd fading into the background as the two of you shared a quiet moment. there was something unspoken between you now, something that went beyond the playful teasing and jokes.

“you know,” riki said, glancing at you out of the corner of his eye, “this whole thing—working together, laughing, making this auction happen—it’s been... nice. really nice.”

you turned to him, catching the genuine warmth in his gaze. “yeah,” you agreed, feeling a sense of contentment you hadn’t realized you’d been missing. “it’s been good.”

the awkwardness from earlier had melted away, replaced by a sense of ease you hadn’t felt in a long time. you could see riki in a new light now, not just the careless, teasing guy from your past, but someone who actually cared, who had grown alongside you.

“so,” riki said, breaking the silence, “now that the auction’s done, what do we do next?”

you raised an eyebrow, a playful smile tugging at your lips. “well, since you owe me a date, we could start with that,” you said, unable to resist.

riki smirked, his usual confidence returning. “oh, i’m looking forward to it.”

riki’s smirk softened as he took a small step closer to you, his gaze lingering on yours in a way that made your heart race. the space between you felt different now—more intimate, charged with a new energy that neither of you had quite acknowledged until now.

“yeah?” he asked softly, his voice almost a whisper as his hand brushed against yours, just a touch, but it was enough to send a jolt through you.

you nodded, feeling your breath catch. “yeah,” you replied, your voice steady, though your heart was anything but.

he was so close now, his presence overwhelming in the best way, and for a moment, neither of you spoke. the noise of the event faded away, leaving just the two of you standing in the soft glow of the lights.

without another word, riki leaned in, his eyes flickering down to your lips before meeting your gaze again, seeking permission. you could feel the warmth radiating from him, the same warmth that had been growing between you both over the last few weeks.

you couldn’t help but smile, a little breathless, before you leaned in, closing the gap. the kiss was soft at first, tentative, but the moment your lips met, something shifted. it was like a weight had been lifted, like all the years of misunderstandings, teasing, and distance finally melted away.

riki’s hand found its way to the back of your neck, pulling you just a little closer as the kiss deepened, slow and gentle. it was everything—everything you’d both been waiting for, without even realizing it.

he pulled away smiling, wiping the small bit of lipgloss that had smudged, looking into your eyes.

the two of you shared a look, the kind that spoke volumes, and for the first time, you weren’t worried about the future. you didn’t know where this would go, but for once, it didn’t matter. what mattered was that you were here, together, and that was enough for now.

149 notes · View notes

thelov3lybookworm · 2 days ago

Text

Journals (part 2)

Part 1

Summary: new realisations and hauntingly beautiful words

•○●⛦●○•

Word Count: 2059

Warnings: heavyyyy angst, mental health issues, depression, feeling unworthy of love, panic attack, self harm (alluded to), self hate. thats all i can think of right now, but let me know if i need to add anything

A/n: based on old poetry by @garden-of-runar 🤭i had reblogged them to my drafts on a side blog that i dont use at all, so i couldnt reblog them on my main, but i have put them in the fic, so ig that works🤷🏻‍♀️ also, if i ever write a part 3 (which i might based on feedback) azzie would be the love interest <3

ALSO MY GIRLIE IS SO TALENTED DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED I LOVE THESE POEMS 🥹

(im also tagging people who asked for a part two hope u dont mind <3)

anyways, enjoyyyy!!

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

Lying on the ground, despite how it hurt her joints sometimes, was one of Y/n’s favourite pastimes. Maybe because sometimes she did not have the energy to crawl into her bed, but that was not the point.

They hate you.

The hardness of the wood panels was oddly comforting, the way the grains sometimes raised enough for her to feel them with her fingers, the soft creaking when she stepped on them. It reminded her that she was here, that she was alive. That she was getting what she deserved for being so pathetic.

The soft mattress did not give her the same level of comfort. Sure, it was warm and cozy, but did she deserve it?

No.

You deserve this.

You deserve the worst.

Y/n sniffled, lying on her side as she lifted her hand higher next to her, dragging her nails down the planks, the feeling overwhelming in itself but better than not feeling anything. She watched her fingers jerk with the motion, pale and bloodless.

She could feel her tears collecting in a pool and seeping under her cheek. She glanced at the foot of the bed in front of her.

It looks so majestic from down here.

Do people who are worse off think the same way about me?

I don’t want them to. Because I am not worth being thought of like that.

I am nothing. I am pathetic.

It became harder and harder to take in a breath from her nose, as it continued to grow clogged from all her sobbing.

It was one of her least favourite things about crying.

Pathetic.

Stop it!

You’re pathetic. Crying over nothing.

You don’t deserve anything good.

The thoughts kept echoing in her head, louder and louder. She couldn’t breathe any longer.

And it was not because of anything physical.

Her chest began to constrict, forcing her lungs to let out precious air. She tried to breathe it back in, desperately wishing to cling to any remnants of oxygen like a child clinging to its mothers skirts.

Please. Just one inhale.

Her throat tightened.

Just one.

She gasped, futilely trying to breathe one last time to breathe before she knew she would collapse, faint because of the lack of air in her body. It gave her some reprieve, and her eyes focused back to the bed.

The longer she stared at it, the more drowsy she became. Her eyelids were drooping, and she finally, finally decided that maybe letting herself submit to her body’s needs wouldn’t be too bad, if it meant that the thoughts would stop. Maybe if she gave in to the tiredness in her bones after hours of sobbing, her mind would stop being so cruel.

Maybe it would take pity on her.

Maybe.

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

"We should go out tomorrow!"

Y/n smiled a little. A rare smile that only recently had begun showing on her face.

It wouldn’t be considered a real smile. But it was still there on her face. The tilt of her lips.

We. Not me. We.

They wanted her to be present too.

Cassian jumped up, looking at Y/n with a grin. "I always wanted to take Y/n out to Rita’s."

Her smile grew.

The other members talked, making plans for tomorrow. Slowly, the conversation spiralled, as it always did between them all.

Azriel leaned close to Y/n, whispering jokes in her ear that made her giggle. Rhysand sat on the same couch as Cassian, fighting like children. Mor sat next to Amren, amusement shining in her eyes as she added fuel to the fire, while Amren looked like she’d rather be anywhere but here.

They talked well into the night, politics, food, court gossip bleeding into one another as the time trickled by.

But the moment the conversations wandered into their future, Y/n’s smile faded. She wondered, would they want her to stay in their life?

She didn’t have to wonder long, as the words they uttered were enough to give her peace.

They talked of vacations, of parties and new traditions. Of getting married, of being with their partners. Of celebrating lives and years and months, of celebrating ends and new beginnings.

They talked, and included her.

They talked in ‘we’s’. Not in ‘me’s’.

And that was enough for her little heart to be happy.

For it to heal, for the blood to return to her face.

For her to smile, free and unbidden.

But then, time passed. And just like the sand in an hourglass trickles away, so do all good things.

As she watched, the scene changed from only housing six people in the living room, to adding three more members. And slowly, she was pushed out.

And they began talking in ‘me’s’.

Some ‘we’s’, but it never meant Y/n.

No, it meant them. Them and their partners.

It meant Feyre and Rhysand. Their new lives and baby.

It meant Cassian and Nesta. Their new mating bond and blooming love.

It meant Azriel and Elain. Their growing infatuation.

Y/n doubted the infatuation had ended, as Azriel no longer sat next to Elain at dinners. Lucien’s visits to Velaris had increased too.

But everyone’s visits to Y/n and their thoughts about her had decreased. No one seemed to remember her existence.

And she deserved it.

They chatted among themselves, and the armchair she sat on vanished from under her, leaving her standing knee deep in the freezing snow. Watching from the outside as the warm interior that had seemed so welcoming just a moment ago turned into a nightmare.

Her worst nightmare.

It left her whimpering, leaving her to curl on the cold ground.

All alone, just like she deserved.

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

It was almost sunset, and finally, Rhysand had built up the determination to read the damned journal.

He walked downstairs, peering into the living room before stepping in front of it.

Mor had departed after Y/n had left, tears in her eyes. Azriel and Cassian had been sitting in the living room for the whole two hours since then, staring into space, looking haunted and horrified at the way they hadn’t realised what was going on with their friend. Amren too, sat in an armchair in the corner, looking as unbothered as ever. But Rhys saw the cracks. The shifting eyes, the too hard hold on the book she held in her lap, the downward tilt of her lips more pronounced.

"I think it’s time we read the journal."

Four sets of eyes shot up to his figure.

"Are you sure, Rhys?" Cassian mumbled, standing up uncertainly.

Rhys nodded. "It is the only option we have."

Azriel sighed, mirroring Cassian’s movements and moving closer to Rhysand.

Feyre perked up. "What is going on Rhys?"

He clenched his jaw, guilt and regret festering in his gut. He had been so busy in his newfound happiness, so wound up in enjoying every moment with his mate that he had forgotten family. He had forgotten her to the extent his mate didn’t even know what the slight tang of copper in the air meant.

"Nothing, Feyre." He mumbled, turning away.

"Elain was asking-"

"Tell her to stop asking, then." Rhysand froze at the coldness in Azriel’s voice, his eyes going wide. Azriel never used that tone of voice with anyone outside of work, let alone Feyre.

Feyre stepped back, her calves hitting the couch as she stared at her friend in shock. "Az?"

Azriel pushed past Rhysand, making his way towards his study where the journal sat, looking as frustrated and unapologetic as ever.

After a shared glance, Rhysand and Cassian followed, Amren hot on their heels.

Azriel was already seated in one of the chairs at Rhysand’s mahogany desk, his eyes fixed on the journal that lay in the middle, his jaw clenched. He seemed to be the most affected, and Rhys only had the faintest idea why.

The four of them sat in waiting until Mor finally arrived, shutting the door behind her. Her eyes were bloodshot, and she sniffled lightly as she came to stand next to Cassian.

"Rhys, do we really have to read it? It will be an invasion of privacy."

Rhys swallowed. Thought it over. "We don’t really have a choice, do we? We need to figure out the root of this. She won’t tell us if we ask, we know that. Plus, she might already be way down the path of another breakdown after what happened today."

"That is why I think that instead of sitting around on our arses," Azriel ground out, "we should go and check up on her."

Rhys raised a brow, though concern festered in his gut. "Azriel, we’ve been through this before. She will feel worse about herself, thinking she inconvenienced us."

A muscle feathered in Azriel’s jaw, but he said nothing.

And so they began reading.

Rhysand opened a random page, his breath catching at the sudden tang of copper, and began reading. As he stared at the words before speaking them aloud, he remembered seeing the exact poem in a book he recommended to Y/n over fifty years ago.

Forgotten.That is my nameThat is the path I walkIt has been so longI don’t remember what it is like to be seenAnd I spill, my tears lining the path to the woods where my body lies,Forgotten.- from GardenofRunar

Instantly, Rhysand’s blood ran cold. He leaned back, exhaling. The pages were decorated in flowers and hearts, tiny little clouds and doodles in the margins so at odds with the thoughts spilled onto them like a hauntingly beautiful scenery.

At this point, Cassian and the others had moved to peer over Rhys’s shoulder. Rhys watched as Cassan reached over to turn the page with a shaky hand, pulling it back almost instantly as if the page had burned him. There, just above the words was a small handful of doodles, and he knew the small figures resembled the inner circle before Rhys had been taken under the mountain.

The poem was more a letter than anything, except it contained so few letters but thy hit everyone with a guilt so hard it was almost like a mountain fell onto them.

So like Y/n, to say so less yet still make an impact.

I didn’t forget about you.Can you say the same for me?Don’t bother.I know the answer.-GardenOfRunar

Under the poem, were a few words.

The poet is so talented. Every poem of them I read, it makes me want to sob.Maybe because I relate to these. Maybe that’s why.

Quiet sniffles came from Mor, but Rhys turned another page. It was the first page where blood began dotting the corners, a few drops on the center of the page veining out towards the edges, as if trying to exit but being unable to.

The almost poeticness of the sight was not lost on them. The blood droplets were almost like Y/n, trying to escape a cruel mind but unable to.

My friends are living lives, and I’m trudging through a million little days,Wasting away.- GardenofRunar

A hand snaked towards the book, slamming it shut. Rhysand jumped, his eyes flying to the owner of the scarred hand that appeared.

"Enough." His voice was still, quiet, but so cold it could freeze even the summer court over. And Rhysand knew. He was blaming himself for not paying attention to Y/n.

Rhys nodded, feeling guiltier by the second.

Everyone went back to their places, sitting in silence. Contemplating.

Wondering how they had become so oblivious to the point that they couldn’t see what was right in front of them the entire time.

The regret, the sadness was heavy in the air. It was getting hard to breathe it in.

Finally, Azriel stood, grabbing the book.

Then he turned, and walked out the door without a word, his wings pulled tight against his back.

And Rhysand wondered again.

Was this just some friendly concern, some self blame, or something else entirely?

Needless to say, suspicion took root. But guilt and hate overwhelmed it once more, and the family was left to sit and roil in it.

To wonder, how could they have been so busy that they ignored such an important part of them?

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

(ps. the first part in the memories/dreams Y/n has is based off this poem

You talk in ‘we’s’ Not ‘me’s’ And it heals my heart, just a little. Puts a smile on my face, just a little. You talk about a future One with me in it And I feel the color Return to my face. Just a little. - Runar

)

@velarisnightsky444 @fasoaurore @anainkandpaper @urfunnyvalentin3 @gabbiskylar01

Permanent Taglist: @berryzxx @sarawritestories @milswrites @throneofsmut

@daycourtofficial @sweetorangeblossom @serenescureforboredom @cassie6392 @harrystylesfan2686

@olives-main @hijabi-desi-bookworm @dnfhascorruptedme

Acotar Taglist: @bubybubsters @eos-princess @nightless @harrystylesfan2686

@cassie6392 @kennedy-brooke @tele86 @miluiel1

@hnyclover @minnieoo @sidrapotter @piceous21

@mybestfriendmademe @saltedcoffeescotch @lady-of-tearshed @starsinyourseyes

@starswholistenanddreamsanswered @cumuluscranium @byyalady

@lilah-asteria @girlswithimagination @garden-of-runar @girlswithimagination

@sunnyspycat @artists-ally @milswrites @kingdomofstarrynights

@berryzxx @buttermilktea11 @loving-and-dreaming @yucanbmylxdy

@mellowmusings @dnfhascorruptedme @fuckingsimp4azriel

Azriel Taglist: @darthdumbasss @foreverrandomwritings @azrielsmate3 @celestialend

@stqrgirlies-blog @tele86 @bakananya @xyzmeh

@st4r-girl-official @caraaaaugh @nacho-nat @allllium

@fandomarchiveilyd @nickishadow139 @angel-graces-world-of-chaos @okaytrashpanda

@celestialgilb @donnadiddadog

153 notes · View notes

fantastic-nonsense · 3 days ago

Note

what are your thoughts on people moving from tiktok to rednote? thank you

From the perspective of forcing Americans to endure the culture shock of realizing Chinese people (and other non-Chinese East Asian people who use Rednote) are humans with lives, feelings, and interests just like them? I think it's a fascinating instance of unexpected cultural exchange between two groups who are usually (and often deliberately) kept apart due to government censorship, language barriers, and corporate influence.

However, as a political staffer? Rednote is horrifying to me because it actually IS owned and operated by the Chinese government (unlike Tiktok) and is part of their deliberate Firewalled internet ecosystem. I know people are moving there largely because of a "throw up my middle finger in the air like I just don't care" teen rebellion spite phase, but there absolutely are better and worse actors in the data privacy and consumer safety space, and anything directly owned by the Chinese government and subject to their espionage laws is definitely a worse one. I hope it's a fad that very quickly dies out.

#asks #tiktok #tiktok ban #rednote #Xiaohongshu

166 notes · View notes

dvmbification · 23 hours ago

Text

" this one's for you !? " ft. isagi yoichi

ever since middle school, you had a best friend who stayed by your side up until now—and that boy was isagi yoichi, a diamond in the rough, who was so close from becoming the top striker of all time, who just needed a little push and polishing—so you gave him that first little push he needed.

"hurry up, yoichi! let me see!"

"are you serious? you know what this means, right!?" blue lock? it sounded genuine, so you cheered him on to participate in this somewhat legit project. "come on, you should go!" "alright, alright. but.." his sheepish grin slowly turned into pursed lips of doubt. "will I ever see you again?" what kind of question was that? "obviously! i'll see you on the other side." you wink at your best friend, smiling as wide as you could.

the loud booming voice from the speakers announces the next player of the blue lock eleven.

"and #11!" his name is called, and your attention was caught, interest piqued. it's him—your best friend—the boy you've been waiting to see again since early highschool. he enters the stadium, taking the view of over thousands of people in the crowd surrounding him, hoping you were in it, watching him closely—and watching him closely you were.

the game felt long, like, really long. on the edge of your seat, you were kept on your toes, fully invested in the last few minutes of the game.

this is it—the clock was ticking, one more goal from the team you were rooting for with all your heart—the blue lock eleven—and they would break the tie with U20. but who would score the winning goal? the itoshi brothers battling to the death to take the ball for themselves was all you were focused on.. one last goal..

and in the blink of an eye, your childhood best friend, isagi yoichi, the same boy you pushed forward since middle school to become the greatest striker in the world—had somehow been keeping his eyes on the ball this entire time, foreseeing the future before him and where it would land—in this case, right where he wants it to be—taking his only chance to score a goal. and with a stroke of luck..

he scores.

3-4. holy shit.

"and with a devastating direct shot, #11, isagi yoichi—has brought the blue lock eleven to victory!" you scream louder than anyone near you, and while you received a few looks of worry or second hand embarrassment, you couldn't care less. he just scored! the crowd applauses, chanting his name—similarly to his teammates, who quickly gathered around him, celebrating their victory as a team. after a while, isagi was dragged into an interview—being broadcasted on television, and the huge jumbotron in the stadium.

"here he is, everyone! the blue lock eleven's isagi yoichi, who scored that dramatic winning goal! we would love to hear your impressions, now that the game is over." isagi's eyes wander around, just realizing the pressure being put on him at the moment. he rubs his thumbs together, palms growing clammier than ever. "i—uh." you giggle a bit at him choking on his words, bringing your hand to cover up your snickering.

"i.. i'm.. happy. super happy." he feels a pang of embarrassment strike through him, but that's what you get for giving such a pathetic answer—it was cute, though. "we've observed that you have the chance to become the U20 representative today," he gulps, awaiting the interviewer to continue his sentence. "what are you looking forward to next?"

you could notice the way he straightened his back, strengthening his stance. "..win." you almost burst out laughing, but anticipate his full answer. "the blue lock eleven.. will win the world cup. all of us—no, that's not right." the world feels quiet at this very moment.

"i.. will bring japan a U20 world cup victory."

and the crowd roars.

"what a bold statement from blue lock's hero!" "now, isagi yoichi, who would you like to thank especially for the person you are today?" his eyes light up at the thought of you. you, the girl he hadn’t seen with his bare eyes since long ago.. he could envision you in his mind, smiling as wide as you could.

"i'd like to give my thanks to my parents, who have supported my dream of becoming the greatest striker in the world.." isagi's hand finds itself rubbing the back of his neck. "my teammates and opponents, who have shaped me into the player i am right now.." he looks around him to search for the girl he's missed oh so dearly in the crowd who was carefully watching him and his words. "and the love of my life. my best friend, who gave me that final push into joining blue lock—if it weren't for her.." and at that moment, you swore your eyes met each other. you stared deeply into his eyes, full of yearning for you, to see you once again. i might cry, you think, as thin lines of your tears cascade down your cheeks.

"i wouldn't be here in the first place." it feels like time had come to a stop. he finally finds who he was looking for, you, in the crowd. directly looking at you, he smiles as wide as he could.

#( dvmbification )#blue lock #bllk #blue lock isagi yoichi #bllk isagi yoichi #isagi yoichi #isagi yoichi x reader #isagi yoichi x fem reader #blue lock x reader #blue lock x fem reader #bllk x reader #bllk x fem reader #blue lock fluff #bllk fluff #isagi yoichi fluff #sorry guys the aventurine sugar daddy au will have to wait.. im obsessing over this man rn

108 notes · View notes

megumismyhusband · 2 days ago

Note

HAIII!!! Can i request Bllk characters reacting to a tall s/o thats also a foreign but like their of course taller then her, but when they stand next to another girl, she just looks so intimidating cause of how tall she is compared to other japanese women. (PLS INCLUDE NAGI, SAE, RIN AND SHIDOU😘😘) LOVE U

soso sorry this took so long but i hope you like it

nagi

•honestly, nagi doesn’t care about height. like, at all. he’s already tall so when he sees you’re tall too, he just thinks, “oh, less effort to look down.”

• he likes that you’re tall, though. it means you can reach things for him when he’s too lazy to stand up. “hey, grab that for me? you’re closer.”

• when you stand next to other girls and look all intimidating because of how tall you are, nagi doesn’t really get why people are scared. he’ll just blink and be like, “what’s their problem? you’re nice.”

• he probably doesn’t even notice how others react to you half the time. if you bring it up, he’d just yawn and say, “eh, it’s not a big deal. you’re cooler than them anyway.

sae

• sae notices your height immediately. he’s not towering, so he finds your height striking in a really attractive way. “you stand out in the best way possible,”

• he’s protective, especially when he notices people staring or feeling nervous around you. if you ever feel awkward about it, he’ll gently hold your hand and tell you, “it’s not your fault you’re gorgeous.”

• when you stand next to smaller girls and look intimidating, sae finds it a little funny.

• if anyone says something rude about your height, he shuts it down immediately. “they don’t know what they’re talking about. you’re perfect.”

• he’s genuinely in awe of how confident and poised you look, even when you’re not trying. to him, you’re the definition of elegance.

rin

• rin’s already tall, so he’s not fazed by your height at all. in fact, he thinks it’s nice to have a s/o who matches his energy and presence.

• he notices how others react to you, especially smaller girls who seem intimidated, but he doesn’t get why. “you’re not scary,” he’ll say, almost defensively. “they’re just overthinking it.”

• if you ever feel insecure about being tall, rin will quietly reassure you. “you’re perfect how you are. i wouldn’t change anything about you.” it’s awkward but heartfelt.

• he loves how you naturally stand out in a crowd and secretly feels proud to be by your side. it makes him feel less awkward about his own height.

• rin gets protective if anyone comments on your height in a negative way. he won’t make a scene, but he’ll glare at them and mutter something like, “they’re just jealous.

shidou

• shidou loves that you’re tall. you’re taller than most girls? makes you even cooler.

• when you stand next to smaller girls and look intimidating, shidou thinks it’s hilarious. “you’re scaring them without even trying!”

• he’s super vocal about how much he loves your height. “you’re taller, hotter, and way more interesting than all of them. they can deal with it.”

• he absolutely adores how striking and confident you look, even when you’re just standing there. to him, you’re a total powerhouse, and he’s obsessed with it.

119 notes · View notes

suzukiblu · 2 days ago

Text

WIP excerpt for derpsheep behind the cut; “a fake cryptid and a real romantic”. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

Tim is having a terrible night, by which he means the Batman is currently looming over him like a creepy eldritch nightmare of a gargoyle while he’s trying to go meet Superboy for the patrol/hunting-date they scheduled and the Batman is not at all taking the “go away, I have a date” hint.

Said “hint” for the record, was Tim explicitly saying the words, “go away, I have a date”. The Batman apparently thought that meant Calendar Man was causing trouble, though, so now Tim’s being Bat-stalked and has the Batman in his shadow, which is just really, really embarrassing in this situation. Like getting dropped off for a date by your weird neighbor who used to babysit you sometimes or something, he doesn’t know.

Definitely embarrassing, yeah. Just–way too many kinds of embarrassing. He bets Superman isn’t dropping Superboy off right now.

Ugh.

“Look, I promise, this is not a ‘Bat’ thing,” he says. “In no way whatsoever is this in fact a Bat thing.”

leaving Gotham? the Batman asks.

“No,” Tim says with a sigh, because he knows the Batman’s answer to them not leaving Gotham is gonna be–

Bat thing, the Batman says, inexorable and inarguable as a snapped grapple and the force of gravity.

Tim suffers.

“It’s just a date, B,” he says in exasperation. “I don’t follow you to go see Catwoman or Talia al Ghul, do I?”

you do, the Batman says.

. . . dammit, Tim thinks. The Batman wasn’t supposed to notice that.

“Okay but Superboy is not a criminal who’s trying to use me to case a place for a thematic jewel heist!” he protests, puffing up Robin’s feathers indignantly. Most of the time the Batman understands Robin’s body language better than anything, really, and Tim has to admit there is something sort of satisfying about being able to flare up to twice his size when he’s irritated. At least on some level, anyway. “Or an assassin who might wanna feed me to her evil dad’s weird magic pit!”

not feed, the Batman says. awaken.

“That answer is no less creepy and unnerving than the last four times, I hope you know,” Tim tells him. “Not in the least because you’ve never clarified if the League is trying to awaken something in you or something in the pit.”

“Tt,” the Batman says, which is honestly even more creepy and unnerving, given how rarely he actually makes actual noises. Or, like–correction: makes actual noises that sound, like–human, almost. The screeching and wailing and screaming is all pretty standard, but human noises . . . yeah, no.

Tim already doesn’t like to talk to the Batman when he’s in his “human” aspect as it is. He isn’t some self-absorbed socialite or smarmy politician or shallow asshole with no genuine interest in other people, is the thing; when the Batman actually uses his voice, Tim can hear what that voice actually sounds like.

As far as Tim knows, when it comes to humans, literally only Dick’s ever been able to stand the actual sound of the Batman’s voice. Jason apparently just, like–could grit his teeth through it, or hide behind Pennyworth. Tim, personally, forgets he has teeth, when he can actually hear the sound of the Batman’s voice. He doesn’t even know what Selina hears, but he does know she does most of the talking when she and the Batman are out together. And he still feels bad for Superman, after the sister-city gala incident with Metropolis.

Definitely he still feels bad for Superman after that.

#timkon #tim drake #bruce wayne #dc robin #batman #batfamily #wip: a fake cryptid and a real romantic #derpsheep

124 notes · View notes

yuikomorii · 2 days ago

Text

AYAYUI IDOL AU: Chapter 3

// Sorry for the delay; I had some things to take care of, so I couldn’t focus on writing the fanfic. But~, I finally finished the 3rd chapter and even started working on the 4th one… ohoho, that one’s going to be interesting. 👀

Chapter 1, Chapter 2

Place: Rejet Labels building

Ayato: A hotel, huh? Well… whatever they will make us do there, it can’t be that bad, right?

Subaru: Dunno about you, man, but as soon as I know I’m being filmed, I’m pretty much doomed to mess it up.

So yeah, it actually is that bad for me!

Ayato: Haa… relax a little, will you?

At least you’re not going to be stuck on the farm like the Hyung line. If you think working at the hotel sucks, imagine milking cows in the middle of a mud pit!

Subaru: Eww! G-Gross!

Ayato: Yeah, exactly! So, quit whining!

Subaru: Heh, I gotta wonder how they even convinced Reiji to go there. Knowing him, he wouldn’t last five minutes in a place like that!

Ayato: I bet the manager kept the farm thing a secret. If Shu knew, he would have faked being sick in a heartbeat!

— someone spies on them —

???: Hmm…

Kanato: Laito, what on earth are you doing?

— Laito flinches —

Laito: Oh my…— Kanato-kun, didn’t your parents teach you about not interrupting people when they’re in the middle of something~?

Kanato: Well, I’m sure your parents made it very clear that spying on people isn’t appropriate either, but here you are, completely ignoring that little life lesson.

Laito: Nfu, touché.

Kanato: Now tell me, what is this all about?

Laito: Nothing important~. I’m just trying to figure something out.

Kanato-kun, don’t you think Ayato-kun has been acting a bit… different lately?

Kanato: That depends. What exactly do you mean by "different"?

Laito: Isn’t it obvious? It feels like he started ignoring me.

Kanato: That might just be your imagination.

Laito: Hmm… Something still doesn’t sit right with me.

Kanato: If this is causing you so much concern, it would be best to ask Ayato directly what’s going on with him.

— rolls eyes —

Laito: ( You don’t get it. )

Place: Hotel

Co-worker 1: They’re on their way!!

Co-worker 2: Someone, pinch me! I’m about to faint!

Yui’s monologue

Today is the big day!

The hotel staff has been working tirelessly ever since they got wind of the idol announcement.

They’ve been running around, handling everything with meticulous attention to detail, so as to make sure that everything runs smoothly.

I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that I’ve only been in Tokyo for less than a week, and now I’m about to meet two members of one of the biggest groups at the moment.

It somehow feels surreal…!

Although, I really do wish Hana-san could be here as well… She’s the one who deserves to see Ayato-san in person more than I do. But, I suppose there’s nothing that can be done about it.

For this reason, I genuinely hope I’ll be able to get that autograph for her.

Receptionist: This is bad, this is really bad!

Yui: …!

Did something happen?

Receptionist: Unfortunately, yes! Our porter fell down the stairs while getting ready and broke his ankle.

He won’t be able to come in today, and with all positions already filled, it will be impossible to find a replacement!

Yui: Oh no… That’s awful!

( Everyone has put in so much effort to make this day perfect, and it’s just so unfair for something like this to happen out of nowhere! )

But... is there really no one available to pick the luggage and take the boys to their rooms? I don’t think it would take too much time, and the person could easily get back to their usual tasks afterward. Surely someone can step in, right…?

Receptionists: If you’re so confident about that, why don’t you volunteer then?

Wait— That’s it! You could totally do that!

Yui: M-Me!?

( This is not the way I was going for! )

Receptionists: Exactly!

You're a work-exchange girl, right? Your role in these tasks isn’t as crucial as an actual employee’s, therefore your presence isn’t that essential.

That means you could skip whatever task you're doing and step in as the porter today before anyone even notices!

Yui: ( Did I just get called ‘useless’ indirectly? )

I… I would love to help in this situation, but, I’m sorry, I’m not qualified enough for such a job.

( I doubt I would be able to carry the luggage to begin with. Who knows how heavy they are with everything packed inside? )

Receptionists: I beg you, Komori-san!

If you’re worried about whether a girl can handle it, these boys will just stay until tomorrow. They most likely won’t have a lot with them.

Yui: Uuh…

( If it’s just for one day… )

— sighs —

Alright, I accept.

Receptionist: Thank you… Thank you so much!

If there’s any way I can repay you for this, just let me know!

Yui: Ah, there’s no need to. I know you’ve all been working hard for this, so it’s the least I can do.

Receptionist: Well, on a positive note, you'll be the one leading the boys to their rooms, which definitely makes you luckier than the rest of us.

I think this experience alone is rewarding enough, fufu.

Yui: …!

( Wait, I hadn’t really thought about it like that— This will be the closest anyone in the hotel gets to them today, won’t it? )

( I know I should be excited about it, especially since I’ll be able to ask for that autograph for Hana-san, but... ah, I’m feeling so nervous all of a sudden! )

Receptionist: ( The limo arrived! )

Komori-san, go to the hallway!

The driver will soon bring their luggage there, where you’ll have to wait for them. Once they enter, the hallway entrance will automatically close, and then the three of you will head towards their room.

— lends her keys —

I hope the instructions were clear enough. Good luck!

— Yui nods and quickly leaves —

Place: Hotel hallway

Yui: ( Phew, I can’t believe I made it in time. )

( I’m already starting to hear voices, so they must be clo—— )

— entrance opens —

Yui: …!

Ayato: ( Is that… a girl? )

Subaru: ( Hah!? Who even thought it would be a good idea to make a girl a porter? Can she even lift our stuff—? )

Yui: ( No way… they’re even more handsome in real life…! )

( I’d better avoid looking at their faces, otherwise I’ll get too nervous to even concentrate! )

W-Welcome to the “Yume no Mori” hotel. It’s a pleasure to have you here!

— bows and takes luggages —

( Hooh… heavy! )

Please, follow me.

— they start walking —

Subaru: ( Dunno if it’s just me, but I’m low-key starting to get second-hand embarrassment watching her struggle like that. )

Ayato: ( Why would they even hire such a weakling for this type of job? I thought this was supposed to be a 5-star hotel, but maybe they’re just out of budget or something? )

Yui: ( The receptionist told me they’ll be leaving tomorrow, but what on earth did they even pack in these things? My arms feel like they’re about to fall off! )

Subaru: Oi! You… Do you need help?

Yui: Eh?

— looks up —

Ayato: ( Subaru, what are you doing? )

— brushes his hand off —

Can’t you see? This is her responsibility, not yours, so let her do her job.

If she’s not capable of taking it seriously, then she just shouldn’t be working here anymore and risk damaging the hotel's reputation.

Yui: ( Such cold words… )

( While it’s true that I’m not cut out for the porter job, saying something like that to someone is simply uncalled for…! )

A-Anyway, thank you, but there’s no need to. We just arrived to your room.

— opens door and hands them keys —

By the way… I would like to apologize for my poor performance.

The truth is, I am deeply grateful for this opportunity and I——!

*THUD*

( Did they just… slam the door in my face? )

Place: Hotel room

Subaru: Man, the hell’s wrong with you?

Ayato: With me!? You’re the idiot who offered to do her job in the first place!

Subaru: I was just trying to help, okay!? Am I not allowed to do anything without getting chewed out for it now?

Ayato: Tch… you’re so oblivious that it’s giving me a headache. This person works at one of the most prestigious hotels in Tokyo, she should know better!

Imagine putting your trust in someone, only for them to screw up so badly that it could end up destroying everything.

Subaru: But she didn’t even screw up, she was just struggling, that’s all!

Seriously, what’s going on? All this time, you’ve been known as the friendliest person to the fans. You even helped the bodyguard hold the concert fence, for crying out loud!

So what’s with this sudden shift in attitude, huh?

Ayato: That’s…— Well, things have changed! There’s a lot more going on behind the scenes that you don’t even see.

If I keep acting as I once did, the consequences won’t just fall on me—they’ll affect all of us, understood!?

( I just can’t afford to be selfish again… The choices I make now have an impact on others, and I have to be more mindful of that. )

Subaru: I mean… if you put it like that, it makes sense, but you still shouldn’t lose yourself in the process, y’know?

At the end of the day, no matter how much someone screws it up, we... we’re a team, so yeah, we’ll have to find a way to fix it together, I guess.

( Damn, I'm really not good at putting these things into words! )

Ayato’s monologue

"We’re a team."

Those words are supposed to be reassuring, but why do they only make me even more nervous…?

What will truly happen if I put the group in danger, huh? Will they really back me up, or just turn their backs on me?

Shu doesn’t seem like the type to overlook such mistakes—he basically said as much the other days.

As for Reiji and Kanato… Yeah, forget it. They’d make it sound even worse.

And Laito… he’s the one I’ve always been closest to, but even with him… I don’t know. A part of me can’t shake the feeling that if it came down to it, he’d take their side too.

So that only leaves Subaru.

However, knowing him, he’d probably just end up jumping on the bandwagon too. No way that guy would want to be seen as my accomplice or something like that.

Haa… that would indeed be an uncomfortable situation.

After all, no one likes to have shade thrown at them.

…!

( Wait—! )

( Exactly! No one would like that! )

— stands up and heads towards door —

Subaru: Oi, where are you going—?

Ayato: I have to solve something, I’ll be right back.

— leaves —

Subaru: Ok…?

Place: Hallway

Ayato: ( That’s true, I was too harsh on the porter. I didn’t stop to think about what she might have been going through. )

( Maybe she was having a bad day and by letting my own irritation get the better of me… well, I must have surely made it worse. )

( I mean, if I were criticized, I’d feel like crap too. It’s obvious nobody enjoys being judged, especially when they’re already struggling, right? )

( And yet… I did exactly that to her. )

( So yeah, I’ve gotta fix this! I’m going to find her and apologize, even if it’s super awkward. )

Oi, porter!

Author’s note:

*If you forgot what happened in the first chapter and are wondering why Ayato and Yui don’t recognize each other, well that’s because Ayato was wearing a mask and a cap back then, and they were also in the dark, so they couldn’t notice each other’s features well.

#diabolik lovers #yui komori #ayato sakamaki #dialovers #ayato x yui #ayayui #admin #my fanfic

125 notes · View notes