#hi yes. so apparently i finally realized that my dear fake-partner is the first person i've ever gotten a squish for twice

[hopefullystillliving]

Haha silly allos, talking about "catching feelings" hahahahaaaa-ooohhhhhhhh. Oh fuuuu-

So uh. I. Maybe might possibly be getting into a queerplatonic relationship. Which on the surface is basically the same as what we've been doing but internally means that we're gonna actually have to have a Conversation about what this means and where we stand. And I have No Idea what I'm doing. My basis of knowledge for this is fanfiction and therapy. Help.

[rosyk]

Changed

pairing: yang jeongin (as John) x reader (as Sera)

genre: light academia(at least that’s what it’s supposed to be), light angst, girl in love, romance, fluff, royalty

warnings: mentions of blood and self harm

word count: 5.0k

inspiration: White Flowers- Olivia Rodrigo (unreleased song)

a/n: Yes this is the same inspiration from the past post I had but the story is more directed from the song than the other one. It came out different than I thought it would be(quite disappointing), but I hope you’ll like this one as well! Just some little angsty angst.

White flowers. It was once a symbol of our relationship. I loved how they look so peaceful and pure, exactly like how you described me. They were either standing on my porch, sitting inside the mail in front of my tiny house, or lying under the mat. I loved finding my favorite ones whenever it’s our anniversary or on my birthday and let them inside the drawers for safe keeps. You never failed to place thrill in this us. When did I deserve such a guy?

[3RD PERSON]

“My lady, a letter has been sent” Mr. George called up to the lass as she immediately rushed down the long, grand marble stairs in a fluttering flowy dress.

“My lady, a letter has been sent” Mr. George called up to the lass as she immediately rushed down the long, grand marble stairs in a fluttering flowy dress.

“I’m coming!” she responded and was skipping throughout the whole dash to the point that the lady didn’t even notice her parents with her fellow friends sitting near the courtyard, having some tea.

“Oh dear,” the father massaged his forehead and cried out. In response, the men in the room laughed in the view in front of them. Who’d knew that the respectable man from the authorities would be anguished over a simple matter? Frowns were apparent after the father in despair continued his exclaim. “Just wait until your daughter would find a new kid better than his daddy.” Now, it was time for the ladies to laugh.

“Stop being dramatic, love. Things will always get to this. They’d soon start to be like us and even have new kids!” The wife interrupted, teasing his husband a bit more.

“Let me guess, the mother-daughter bond was closer together?” The damsel who sat directly in front of them started a conversation the man least wanted to hear. It was a rare sight to see so they took the opportunity.

“Be careful, Dieur. Your wife was against men in the past. She must’ve talked bad about you.” The father’s closest friend decided to speak up and join the amusement. Despite the father having a bad mood, the atmosphere lightened up. They continued to chat while staring at the young lady in love from afar.

“Mr. George, is it from him?” The lady in the dress who wasn’t able to sleep well because of excitement asked the butler. As if he knew who she meant all along, he passed on the letter with a sealed stamp.

“It’s better to see it for yourself, my lady. Though there are no other more possibilities to receive a letter from anyone different” the butler smiled as he replied. It was pleasing for him to see Sera finally receiving love from the people outside, and not just the ones in the household.

“Oh thank you so much! You’re the best!” Sera hugged the old butler that was flustered and surprised by her sudden actions. He melted in the embrace of the younger one because he acted like her father who was always there for her when Dieur is busy with court duties.

Sera rushed up back to her room and ignored her mother’s muffled words as she was already far away. Tiny heels were clicking and that served as a reminder to the maids that she had already arrived. Plopping herself in bed, the girl squealed with delight.

Barging in the lady’s room, the housekeepers couldn’t hold themselves back. “So, what did he write this time?” Their eyes shone stars and a few tiny jumps were done. Each one of them bickered and shared their opinions on what he’d say for the grand day.

The girl holding the love letter shushed the rowdy crowd and stood up to do her usual routine. The audience knew what she was doing and sighed in frustration. Of course, it was an important letter for Sera. She had to make sure she read it in a room she’s comfortable in to make the writings unforgettable and imprinted in her mind. Firstly, she pulled the big and red curtains, leaving them untied, to cover up the whole scene and feel the calmness of the room. The ones waiting, hurriedly fixed her letters inside the drawer in order but the lady shot them a glare. They whined in response, but all Sera could do was chuckle. After arranging the love letters collected, she positioned herself on the chair beside the bed and turned on the lampshade. As if she was telling a story, the maids began to encircle her at the moment she started to read it aloud.

“How enchanting! It feels so dreamy!” Vanessa, one of the viewers, clasped her hands together and danced with an imaginary partner, earning herself giggles from everyone in the chamber.

This act reminded another servant and made sure to ask her regarding the grand ball. The maids once again clapped in enthusiasm. If anything, they’re the ones who anticipated the male more than Sera herself. Lily, the youngest maid who was 14, opened up first and visualized how the male would arrive.

Their talk reached hours and honestly, Sera was excited with the discussion although she seemed to turn down the ideas a moment ago.

[NIGHT]

The lady wanted to sleep so she could wake up early as soon but the thoughts were forcing her not to. She reminisced their memories before finally deciding to follow the call of her bed.

They haven’t seen each other for years but it remained vivid in her. She remembered how he’d confess out of the blue, sneaked in her room without her parents knowing so she’d be able to sleep well, calls every night, and made sure she was confident with herself. That’s how ideal this guy is.

[NARRATION]

Sera knew it was morning either because she was woken up by the noises from the crowd gathering or she hasn’t slept well again because of excitement. Fortunately, the guy in front of her didn’t know she was really tired, or else he’d be worried and force her to leave the ball and sleep. Of course, the girl never wanted that to happen because she wanted to spend more time with the perfect figure she’s been dancing with.

“Sera, did you have a good night's sleep?” The girl’s little prince asked. Sera hesitated and gulped as she looked into the man’s face who seemed to be amused with what he’s seeing. Okay, maybe he did know things after all.

“Not to worry, I know you had awaited this ball years ago. I won’t let you leave” The man chuckled in delight and it surely made her flutter. What made it more interesting was the fact that he didn’t know she’d cry over this ball just to see him in her sight. Oh, how the lass loved to be in his embrace once again.

The boy placed his huge arms behind the girl’s back and pulled her closer to him. Resting her head in between his neck and shoulder, as they danced to the lovely melodies of the piano playing “ A dream is a wish your heart makes”.

“John, I kept all your love letters in my drawer” Sera boasted proudly and wore a tiny smirk that made John smile. It took seconds before he could reciprocate what Sera just said. As soon as he got the grasp of it, both of his eyebrows rose.

“But I’ve written those way before I courted you!” He whisper shouted in shock which caused him to grip her hands tighter but not to the point that it hurt. The girl too was influenced by his sudden emotions and looked at him blank, blinking quite a few times.

“Is it bad?” Sera’s eyebrows furrowed in concern. Negative thoughts came up to her; what if he wouldn’t like me or did I do something wrong? She bit her lip and sulked a bit, forming a little pout in her seemingly heart-shaped lips.

“I’ve probably sent 500 of them by now” John’s expression was clear. He was confused, thinking how ridiculous the idea might have been. He sent letters for her to read but not to the point of storing everything when he had done that years ago.

“It’s actually 678” The girl looked down without knowing why. He couldn’t stare at his eyes, wondering whether it’s because of the embarrassment that made her wished to be swallowed up by the ground any moment now or maybe because of her guilt as if she had done something wrong because that’s what John made her feel.

The man decided to shrug the idea off because he realized how the girl felt. This wasn’t their expected first encounter after she had been waiting for months and he thought it was probably just him dramatically overreacting towards a simple matter. He wanted to cheer her up so he gave an unforeseen remark.

“You just love me, don’t you?” Sera managed to look back at him just to see a teasing smile. She giggled softly and pursed her lips, narrowing her eyes as if she was thinking. John groaned playfully with the fake hesitation the lady was showing.

“Do I?” Both of her eyebrows rose in shock and questioned. The lass took her hand off his to brush his shoulder, tidying the non-existent dust in a sassy manner. John broke out a tiny smile before choosing to join in her play.

“Oh I know you do, love” He stated and retrieved her hand in the right place it was destined to be. They began waltzing in a slow tempo as he kissed her hand in between, which left the lass in true shock because of his sudden movements. A grin was evident in the man and so she began to laugh quietly, shaking her head on both sides as a matter of disbelief.

“But I don’t think so” Sera kept teasing as John continued to respond so cheekily. She tiptoed a bit to reach his height as she went closer to her face. Of course, John wouldn’t give up in this encouraging situation.

“You do”

“I do?”

Their faces went closer until Sera tried to cover up her blushing face with her hands. The man wouldn’t let her hand go and so as she tried to stand properly on the ground and lowered herself from tiptoeing, he placed his hand at her back and pulled her closer. The girl flinched quite a bit in his touch, which the guy never failed to not notice. He wore a smug look and rose one of his eyebrows, tilting his head to look straight at her eyes. The lady’s face started to heat further than ever. Thus, she struggled away from the embrace but the more she tried, the little the gap is in between their faces. It was all fun and games until their nose brushes against each other and they could hear breathings.

“I could hear your heartbeat from here” John’s whisper sent chills to the lady all over her body. Because he doesn’t want anyone to hear for the moment, he lowered the volume of his voice causing him to lower the tone unintentionally as well. The best description would be a seductive whisper girls would swoon over. That was how lucky Sera was, she thought.

John looked at her lips and tilted his head, in which she could assume he was going for it. She gulped and just as she was about to close her eyes, loud claps and squeals echoed around the room. Right, they were in the ball and they’ve almost forgotten, she reminded herself. John kissed her forehead that made her cheeks blush, now looking very obvious. Despite that, she still wished her first kiss would be taken away by him.

[NIGHT AFTER THE BALL]

Sera couldn’t get over the ball yet. While she was eating, reading, and in every step she took, she’d always hum the song played in the dance. It was like a magnificent dream to dance with her prince charming. Her father would start to get annoyed as the maids get jokingly jealous of how lovely she looked being so happy. Though it was already 3 in the morning and the lady was waiting for the call. He never missed a night without calling her until she looked up the letter given. The handwriting wasn’t really clear but it was obvious he wrote it quickly. It says he couldn’t be able to talk on the phone tonight as he had lots of things to do. It wasn’t deep and she knew she should’ve been glad he took time writing the letter just to stop her from worrying. But despite the optimism, she forces herself into, she broke down in tears. Cuddling her pillows as she wept is something that isn’t unusual. It’s been months since he was gone and it’s also been months when she started crying herself to sleep. Even a single evening without him would crash her heart and tear herself apart. It’s also been a long time since she thought if he had lost interest in her. A single missed call is enough to harm the lady so pure.

With nails digging, she just watched the blood flow through her glass skin. It was painful but much better than the call she wasn’t able to receive. Isn’t she enough? Insecurities passed by her mind and all she could do was wail silently that only she could hear, with voice cracking out.

[TIMESKIP- AFTERNOON]

“So I’ve thought about your wedding....and” Before continuing to speak, Sera’s mother took a sip from her cup in the same favorite courtyard she’d always be.

“We could plan the wedding, sooner but not now” Sera casually talked as her parents both stared at her in surprise. Her father choked on his tea and continued coughing, while Sera patted his back and asked if something was wrong in what she just said.

“My, my.... is that really you?” Her mother explained in an accent and scoffed. She wondered when her daughter started to act so maturely as if she didn’t just whine and force them to marry the guy she really loved about a year ago. Was this the effect of the man leaving her for months?

“The drama is real”, Sera thought.

“You’ve grown more mature” The father mentioned like it was the biggest miracle he had seen. He was in delight but turned the usual grumpy old man, the moment her wife started to speak.

“It’s the boy’s effect” The wife tapped his husband’s shoulder to hit his ego, though the context seemed to be like a warning. Sera noticed how off it was for her to mention John so to be rest assured, she asked her mother.

“Boy’s effect? You mean John?” She chuckled and pressed her lips together, waving her hands to dismiss the idea and hoped it isn’t as obvious as it seems. The father on the other hand still doesn’t get the hang of it; john and everything that relates to that bloody guy.

“Yes!” The mother joyously raised her tone and turned herself to have her body directly at Sera. This lets her know that her mother is trying to explain something complicated or unseen. “You have changed greatly, don’t you think?” She continued.

The daughter was left confused and had her eyebrows furrowed. “Changed?” She tilted her head in question and took some time to let the information seep into her mind. Though, she remained clueless.

“In the past, you used to talk about your everyday lives to the point that I grew tired from hearing your stories. But your father? He loved them and wanted to hear more of it. But now that you’ve grown, everything we hear from you is about John” Sera’s mother laughed in a low volume. The conversation ticked the father off so he decided to interrupt and share his thoughts.

“John here, john there. You wouldn’t even bother choosing your wedding because you decided to go with what he wants, even though you’re the bride here. You wore clothes that would impress him every day and can’t stand a night wherein he wouldn’t be able to call. Goodness gracious, where did this john come from?” Dieur ranted and lifted his hands in the air for disapproval. Pity the father, as the ladies could only laugh at his speech. He looked at the two in bewilderment and just after he thought of scolding them, his wife spoke.

“We can’t blame love like roses” The mother stood up and was ready to leave due to an appointment. Once again, Sera was perplexed. She felt like everything her mother says went out of the blue. Is it just her guts or feeling? Or maybe it’s indeed the reality she failed to notice? To calm herself down from the sudden panic that came out of nowhere with no further reason, she asked about it. The father answered the question whilst thinking his wife couldn’t hear the daughter’s request.

“Typical roses where love and passion are as deep as its color and signifies that both partners are ready for commitment. It’s commonly used on marriages, just like the one you’re planning” the father scrunched his nose a bit to show how annoyed and cringe he must’ve heard that statement. Dieur can’t stand the topic and so he left first. Her mother didn’t know he was gone but at the same time, she also hoped her words reached her daughter. Thus, before talking to someone and preparing to step into the little and open carriage, she continued. Her daughter heard it quite muffled and unclear, but her wish and intentions came true.

“Not that one, darling”

[TIMESKIP]

It’s been days since Sera heard her mother’s quote but still doesn’t understand the meaning behind it. It would be pointless to keep asking as her mother makes excuses and changes the topic. All she’d heard from her was “trust me, you will regret hearing this”, and with a smile contrasting the words she spoke, she left the house for a business trip with her father.

“My lady, didn’t you want to visit the garden?” Another butler she hadn’t seen before, which she assumed was new, stepped in after knocking. “The carriage is ready” He bowed and was ready to leave until she called her out.

“Is John already here?” The servant was taken aback by the question but was luckily able to respond.

“Not yet, my lady” He replied and observed her lady’s expressions. Thinking it is about the garden, he was left surprised.

“We’ll wait for him” Sera replied with a tiny smile and shifted her position to get ready. He had it coming but not a single thought came up to him that she’ll risk such an opportunity. It was her dream to get into the secret garden her mother had when she was young. She had waited to step into the magical place for years because it amazed her how the flowers planted are changing every 4 years, but now he’s considered John again.

“Milady, what if he couldn’t come as usual?” He asked once again, tone slightly higher than he intended. All the lady could do was stare at him in frustration as if asking if he would dare repeat the question. He didn’t expect the lady to have a frightening aura, so he apologized for digging in further into personal matters.

The lady exhaled and fidgeted her fingers due to the slight guilt and awkward tension she had created. “That man is just..” trying to find the right word for it, she snapped her fingers. As soon as she got ahold of the perfect one, she continued with a change of mood. “Everything I cannot do without” she smiled and ask for him to leave, which he immediately and willingly did.

The butler walked slowly within the halls and was snapped out of his thoughts after hearing a maiden’s voice and a tap on her shoulders, asking him what’s wrong. He said he was fine but was still confused after the words he had heard; because the man being everything the girl can’t do without, seemed like she was lost in love.

[AFTERNOON]

Sera was figuring out everything she had done wrong as she walked back and forth in her locked room. It also had been weeks since the man said he’ll be hers forever. If you’re thinking that was romantic, that isn’t how it is to her. Somehow, it doesn’t feel the same anymore. Thoughts were rambling inside her head and she felt close to breaking down. “He wouldn’t call it off with me right?” the vulnerable lass fell to her knees and covered her face as she tried to fight back the tears. What would she do if he was planning to leave her? She took a rest while tears were still flowing non-stop.

Hours later, she was woken up by knocks on the door and her tears had dried up. Just to make sure, she placed on little makeup where it was light enough to be noticed. Of course, she’d cry without seeing him for the past months so she should know what to do in order to not get caught.

“Come in” she acted as if she was fixing the books on the shelf but was stunned by the figure standing in front of her. She thought he wouldn’t be able to come, but now here he is.

“John!” She went up to him and hugged him immediately. The man in response hesitatingly stroked her hair. The lass noticed the change and asked him what was wrong.

“Are you fine?” The lass widened her eyes in concern and bit her lips. She was scared and thought about what would happen if her nightmare would turn into reality because there is indeed a possibility. “But that can’t be right?” She thought again, trying to change her mindset for a thousandth time today.

John sat down on her bed and sighed, patting the space beside him. Sera walked slowly and tried to hold his hand but he was quick to pull away. And that’s when she knew, it’s finally happening.

“Don’t you think it’s not working out?”

The lady hiccuped and tried to compose herself. Her hands were shaking and no matter how clear the statement John said, she tried searching for other thoughts that make her rest assured just like the usual. Unfortunately, nothing did make her calm down. “What..what do you mean?” She chuckled as a sign to tell the man it isn’t what she thinks it is; though nothing could change something that already did change, as what the man had thought.

“You turned different, Sera” John looked down and felt guilty but all Sera could do was stare in disbelief. She knows herself so why do people think she had changed? For her, it’s a useless excuse everyone had been using. It’s messing with her mind and made her frustrated with how people acted as they knew her in the very beginning.

“Is this a way of defending yourself?” She spoke in annoyance, which caused John to slouch a bit, feeling apologetic but also tired. He had it coming but never did say he was ready for this talk.

“You don’t understand-“ John had his head up to meet Sera in the eyes and explained himself but was immediately cut off which made him get frustrated as well.

“What don’t I understand-“

“Everything!” The tone John showed was a lot harsher than he thought, but he stood unknowingly due to the patience running out. He pulled his hair and his voice started to crack. It was the first time he showed such a painful sight to Sera, which made the lady sob as well. “I loved you. I loved the girl who made me smile but it felt like the girl just remained in the past. You appreciated me but now, you demanded more. Everything you’re doing makes me feel insecure, Sera. Was I never enough?” The man gripped the sheets and felt the pain hit straight into him. He tried to lessen his cries but the feeling was just too much for him to fix. The partner in front of him placed her hand on his face and managed to wipe her tears, despite the continuous flowing of it. It made her tear up because that was the exact thought she had in mind, turned out it backfired against him.

“No... please, you’re perfect. You loved me perfectly.” Sera managed to talk in between the sobs and stutter. John took off her hand from his face and sighed in a shaking manner. He bit his lips to quiet down his cry to the point that it bled a little.

“Then why do you feel like I didn’t love you like any other? Why do you feel like I’m not giving you the attention you need? Why do you feel like I’m tired of you? Why can’t you make decisions without me as if I feel like I’m trapping your freedom? I just noticed it was different after you scolded me because I wasn’t able to call you the night before. You relied on me wholeheartedly but acted as if I never did gave you almost everything I could” John sighed and walked up to the door. Sera was pleading, begging hopelessly for him not to leave her behind, but he took another step outside the door. She regretted it deep and straight from the heart because unknowingly, it made John feel the pain. She made her insecure after all the overthinking she did in the past nights. It felt as if she didn’t trust John at all.

After a few hours of bawling her eyes out, she ran unto the garden expecting white flowers. She barged in the place, knowing it was probably the time they’ve finished growing the flowers she’d wanted to see with him all this time, yet failed to. But looking around the vast field, it was all red roses. “Maybe it isn’t fate,” she thought and reached out to one of the roses. She was lost in the sight of the magnificent flower that felt different among the others, it was tempting not to touch this one. While wiping away her tears, she felt the thorn under instead and hissed in pain. Looking at the blood, she finally understood her mother’s hidden words.

“At first, before stepping inside, the flower looked the same among all the other roses but I enjoyed the view. I noticed a single flower and loved how deep red it was. Except, it was too enticing that I decided to get in contact with it. I felt the thorn and pain but brushed it off since it was a small one. That’s the context my mother was trying to say all along” she thought and finally figured it out but it wasn’t a celebration to call on, indeed she faced regret.

Their love isn’t as pure as a white flower, but as dangerous as red roses. It was captivating that once she’d entered, there is no escape. John started as someone she passed by through. A typical stranger, nothing new and nothing special. But knowing him better, made her smile. She thought at first it was all happiness and cherishing the moments they’ve created with John, but giving all her mind and focus on him, made her feel the pain that she decided to forget because she thought it would pass by at some time. She placed all the hurt aside because she was too distracted with John.

Sera was crazy in love; except it wasn’t sweet anymore. She changed because of the warmth she felt from the guy but can she blame him? No. And the fact that this matter can’t be solved anymore is what wound her the most. No matter how much she tries again to mend herself and start over with John, it wouldn’t be like those silly fairytales. Because if it’s him, she knew her world would stop again for him to continue.

If only someone had told her what she knew now; losing herself in someone isn’t heaven, it’s hell. But if her mother told her what she noticed, it would be enough for Sera to cut off ties with her parents. That’s how head over heels she was. John was at first her happy pill, which became her dose of medication. It felt like a disease that only he could treat from time to time. It couldn’t even be considered as a cure, because she needed him every day in her life. Her mindset of receiving love from him took an effect as if it were drugs. It pulled her closer and closer that it affected her psychologically, messing with her mind. She was pure but everyone knows she wasn’t naive. But the thought of the lady being too much never went across Sera’s mind; it’s like sinking and sinking in reality though she felt like it was a dream. It was this care given that kept her having the perspective that madness to others, is love to herself. It wasn’t because he was the first one to make her feel the butterflies, she forced her thoughts thinking he was distinct from all the guys that had hurt her. Either it was this drive of finding someone who’d treat her good, or just wanted more of what John could give. “I need you like a heart needs a beat“ didn’t feel pleasing after all. It’s all because she perceived their relationship as building her life on his attention, on being an object of his affection. But all John wanted to have was Sera, the one who’d motivate him to get up from his bed. It hurts the most because even Sera misses herself. But “you can be who you wanted to be“ wasn’t true all this time because as simple as going back to her usual self, isn’t a piece of cake when John is around. It’s not that they weren’t meant to be, it all just went wrong because she loved him unhealthily to the point that she had forgotten why he had loved her in the first place. Her love reached beyond the limits; pulling her closer to insanity.

Now crazy in love don’t feel sweet, cause I’m with you but I miss me

[bungostraydoggos]

May I get some imagines of Atsushi, Chuuya, and Tanizaki reacting to there fem s/o saving them and ending up in a coma as a result? Thank you! Love you writing :D

Nakajima Atsushi

It’s been about five months since that incident occurred that led to this present day full of glum and disgustingly bittersweet. No matter what the doctor and nurses say, their encouragement felt artificial to the poor detective and hearing Dr. Yosano’s personal opinion on the matter, it didn’t make him feel any better. Atsushi slides open the private patient room and sits beside the white bed. He stares at her sleeping face while grasping her hand softly and gently. The sickly smell of the hospital was almost unbearable for Atsushi’s sensitive nose yet he’s been here almost every single day. The beast boy shifts his empty gaze towards the window, reminiscing back at that time where all of this mess started. Ah, yes, he still remembers it clear as day and unfortunately, not once did he thought he deserved forgiveness. Atsushi’s mind flashes back to the past when he was assigned to infiltrate and dismantle a foreign organization who were invading Yokohama near the harbor. He managed to sneak into their base with his significant other who was also assigned with the daring mission. Atsushi was the main character of the plan and yet he failed when the enemy leader pulled a surprise attack and initiated a bombarding parade. Explosions happened from left to right while neighboring boats were heavily damaged from the recoiling shrapnels that flung here and there from the dire explosion. Atsushi couldn’t see anything until he saw a sudden blue, oceanic scenery slanting from his perspective. He was pushed off the edge into the sea by a person he knew all too well to be true. Atsushi’s hand tried to reach out to his significant other, but she only gave him a pained expression with a reluctant smile plastered on her face as he embraced into the deep blue waters. As a result, she saved Atsushi from the explosion as she became kinda like the martyr of the whole incident. Atsushi hated the fact that she tried to sacrifice herself to save a cowardly weakling like Atsushi who couldn’t even fulfill the mission that primarily assigned to him. To this day, he still believes it is his fault that his dear significant other has entered in a coma-like state right in front of him. Atsushi holds their hands, shaping their hands into a prayer like his. He wonders if god exists because if so, he prays desperately until dusk that his significant other will wake up soon.

Nakahara Chuuya

Yokohama’s night scenery was unfailingly bright. Its city lights were bustling and glowing with excitement as if anything depressing didn’t exist. The private Yokohama hospital was quiet compared to the popular city of Japan as most doctors retreated back to their dorms or apartments while the nurses continued work and tend to the patients nonstop throughout their ghost shifts. One of the nurses came inside to the VIP patient room and changed the IV drip of the comatosed woman. The nurse looks at the poor patient and sighs. A feeling of pity crept inside the nurse lady as she cleaned the room while another nurse came inside to help her. “I wonder if this patient have any family members? Usually, we’d have visitors requesting but this patient never has any visitors...”The nurse who came inside after her coworker responded.“Actually, there is one person... but he never stays longer than three minutes.”She gives a puzzling look to her fellow nurse, “I wouldn’t call that a visit if it’s only for three minutes.”The beeping noises of the machine filled the atmosphere like background music between the two nurses sharing a conversation. The senior nurse who felt pity for the young woman in comatose changed her blankets as she continued to listen to the other nurse’s ramblings. “This is only a rumor but apparently, the one person who visits this patient is supposedly a member of the Port Mafia organization and on top of that, an executive too!”The feeling of pity grew stronger. What kind of unfortunate event has led to this patient in bed asleep for two years? Could it be that evil Port Mafia man was the sole reason that this poor girl became in a comatose state? Maybe... but once again, the feeling of pity grew stronger. “I feel sorry for this girl. She has no family and no friends. I bet that rumored Port Mafia man isn’t visiting her with good intentions.”The younger nurse objected her coworker’s statement. “I don’t think so,” she points to a white vase on the windowsill that held a beautiful flower, “see that?”The purple flower looked strikingly beautiful but strangely, its bud was closed and the purplish petals were huddled together as if it was hiding. “It’s an anemone flower. Although it’s a sorrowful flower, it also means anticipation.”“Anticipation? Anticipation for what?”“To the day they’ll wake up. You see, that flower closes up like that in night while it blooms during the day,” the nurse continues, “the Port Mafia man I mentioned places a new anemone flower every single day. Romantic, isn’t it?”Now it all makes sense. The nurse who felt nothing but pity for the young patient came to a realization that this patient was in truth well loved and taken care of. Even though she didn’t have any family, she did have someone who deeply cares about her. After cleaning up, the two nurses leave the patient’s room and head off to their next duty. To summarize, Nakahara Chuuya has been visiting his significant other every single morning since the day of the unfortunate incident that happened two years ago. Chuuya took on a dangerous mission that led him into a trap but thanks to his significant other who got the help of Mushitarou’s Perfect Crime ability, Chuuya’s partner became injured and resulted in a coma while ultimately saving Chuuya. It would be no exaggeration that Chuuya’s feelings was filled with guilt, anger, and sadness but as a strong man who promised himself to watch over his lover, he’s been visiting his girlfriend at the Yokohama hospital while leaving a single anemone flower every morning. Perhaps the most pitiful person isn’t the patient like the nurse thought, but actually Chuuya himself...

(The next morning came, and Chuuya’s purple anemone flower bloomed with anticipation.) 

Tanizaki Junichirou

Since the incident of three months ago occurred, the Armed Detective Agency has become busy with nonstop requests and missions. Kunikida and Atsushi would often go investigating together while Dr. Yosano and Edogawa Ranpo solves detective cases whereas Dazai and Kyouka does their own thing when needed. In particular though, Tanizaki has become profoundly busy at work--- more so than anyone else at the ADA which was strange and a little worrying since he has become unhealthily and darkly workaholic due to his significant other has entered in a comatose state. Many of his friends were worried about him but Tanizaki would often shrug off their concern and put on a fake smile saying he appreciated their thoughts. The only person who knew the complete truth was Naomi who has been visiting Tanizaki’s significant other every day at the hospital. She came inside the room with white flowers and a fruit basket. She takes a seat beside her brother’s girlfriend while grabbing an apple and peeling the skin skillfully with a knife. She sighs. Although she knows she’s in a deep sleep, Naomi hopes that there may be a chance that her brother’s lover was listening to her speak even asleep. Naomi talks about her day and all the funny things that has happened at the ADA before coming to a short silence. She begins reminiscing the past. “You might be wondering how my brother is doing. For the most part, he’s doing okay but at the same time, not so much.”Naomi sighs at the fact her brother has never visited his significant other--- not even once.“But don’t worry, he’s only upset that he wasn’t able to save you even though you saved us. Ever since then, he’s been taking on dangerous solo missions and wouldn’t even ask for backup or help.”The knife slipped and pricked Naomi’s finger as she tried to peel the apple skin. Tears began to well up as her voice swelled. Naomi recalls the day where she was held hostage by an enemy group. As Tanizaki tried to save his sister, one of the hitman shot a sneak attack at Tanizaki and Naomi. Bullets came fast like the speed of lightning and while the siblings were left defenseless, Tanizaki’s significant other became their shield as she jumped in taking the bullets to the chest and head--- protecting them. Tanizaki took blame of the incident no matter how much his sister protested. Perhaps the reason Tanizaki has never visited his partner was because he wanted to become stronger first before finally visiting or maybe, he promised himself some things that guaranteed his significant other waking up one day. Stream of tears came dripping down on Naomi’s cheeks and onto the white cotton sheets. She looks up to her sister-in-law and pleads.“Wake up soon, okay?”Unbeknownst to Naomi, Tanizaki stood behind the door of the patient room all this time while listening to the soft sobs of his sister along with the soft heart monitor beeps of his beloved’s. 

[lunasolar2070]

Fakiru Week Day 1 - Bright

Fakir didn't know what he was doing there, he didn't even remember how he ended up there.

He closed his eyes, as if that gesture would lessen the chatter around him, and concentrated. Why was he there?

Oh yes, it all started because of his best friend, Mytho.

— Oh, come on, Fakir! You can’t spent all your day inside a dusty library only drinking black coffee! Let’s go outside and have some fun! — Mytho said, stealing the pen from Fakir’s hand.

The black haired man sighed and pressed his tempers. He wasn’t like his friend, actually, he was the opposite. While Mytho loved the bright sunlight and fresh air, Fakir would always prefer a good silent café were he could write peacefully, especially under the moonlight. They were like the opposite faces of the same coin.

His friend would always respect his tastes and enjoyed some of them, but in that specific day, he was annoyingly insistent.

— Mytho, I’m telling you, I have to finish this until the end of the next week, and I’m having a block here. Please, don’t make it harder. — he said, waiting with his hand in the air for the stolen pen

Mytho pouted and gave it it back.

— Hey, that’s why I’m trying to take out of your cave! Fakir, of course you’re having a block, you don’t see nature and people! How do you expect to write something. You need some light, man!

Fakir thought about it. Well it made sense, and apparently, Mytho wouldn’t give up.

He sighted, defeated and raised his emerald eyes to meet the golden ones.

— So, where are we going?

Mytho’s lips curved in a huge smile

— I knew it! I mean, hum, we’re going to a party tonight. The fire festival! So you better put on some traditional clothes get ready to have fun!

At that right moment, Fakir was already sorry that he agreed.

Now, there he was. Wearing, on his point of view of course, a ridiculous knight costume with a plastic sword atched on his waist.

Mytho was looking great. He already looked like a prince, but now... He wore a medieval prince costume in tones of white and blue, with a long white cape and a golden crown shining in the top of his white hair.

Fakir still didn’t understand why his friend dragged him there. Well, they had good music and food, but the atmosphere... there were a lot of people chatting loudly and dancing all over the place. A huge campfire was set in the middle of the festival and it was really bright. It was too much for him.

— Hey, Fakir! — he heard the white haired man calling for him.

He got closer and saw Mytho and his fiancé, Rue. She also was a friend of his, even if she was a little bossy, she was like a dear little sister for him.

— Hey, and hello, Rue.

She gave him a little smile and took a little look at him.

— You really look better in this than in the old overcoat you like to wear.

He grinned at her.

— And it looks like the bossy princess found the perfect outfit.

Rue really looked like a princess. Her red dress had white details and, just like Mytho, she had a shiny golden crown resting up on her dark and curly hair.

— Well, I guess it fits me, huh? — she said in reply, playfully.

He nodded and faced Mytho.

— So? What are we actually doing? I bet we’re not here to listen some gossip or have some medieval tea, right?

Mytho laughed lightly.

— Well, if you want to, go ahead! Their camomile tea is amazing!!

— Oh yeah, it’s delicious! — Rue confirmed in approbation

Fakir gave them a glare and they laughed.

— No, my friend, we are here to dance!

The dark haired woman giggled and touched his shoulder.

— Mytho and I thought it would be great for you to see people, interact and who knows.... — she whispered — maybe you end up finding a muse?

He rolled his eyes.

— I assure you’re mistaken. I don’t need a muse to work, but I appreciate the worry for me.

Mytho exchanged a glare with Rue and winked.

— Every artist has a muse. When you find yours, you’ll realize. — then, he looked around, looking confused — But wait a minute.... Now that we’re talking about art... Rue, where’s Ahiru?

It was Rue’s turn to look around.

— Oh my God don’t tell me she got lost again? She was here a minute ago!

Now Fakir was confused. What was happening?

— Who are you guys looking for?

Rue shook her head, sighting.

— Ahiru, my best friend. She said she would be coming to the party so I invited her to be with us, by where is she??

Mytho put his hand in her shoulder, smiling.

— Don’t worry, dear, she will show up eventually. But for now, may I have this dance, my princess?

She blushed and took his hand, letting him guide her close to the campfire, leaving Fakir with a mind full of confusion.

Muse? Why would he need one? It was just one more of those clichés that artists believed.

Mytho and Rue danced around, they’re eyes were filed with love and no word were needed to say.

Fakir watched them from afar, actually, he watched all the couples as he by himself, didn’t pick anyone to dance.

He though everything was oddly funny. He was a writer, used to give every and each character he created a happy ending with the partner of their dreams. But there he was, a man who only could write about love but never felt it himself.

His throat got dry, so he went to a booth were he could get something to drink.

As he finally laid his hands in the warm cup of dark coffee, he saw her.

A redhead woman was dancing with a little girl, spinning her and laughing.

Usually, Fakir would get annoyed by a woman’s laughter, high pitched and most of the times fake, but her laugher was different. It was light, clear and above all, sincere.

When he finally got to see her face, he felt a sudden bump of warmth in his chest.

She had adorable freckles in her cheeks, a petit nose, rosy and fluffy lips, a beautiful smile and her eyes... were magnetic. They were crystal blue, but they seemed to pull him to the depths of the ocean.

The light of the campfire was made her elegant white dress glow, making her look like a graceful swan princess, having a little crown in the side of her head. Her hair was down and it was so long and curly! Fakir wondered how it felt to touch those curls...

— That’s it, Uzura, you’re doing great! — she clapped for the little girl she was dancing with.

— Did you see, Ahiru? I danced-zura!

Ahiru, so that was Rue’s friend. Although her name meant duck in japanese, her beauty surely was one of a swan.

— Uzura, come here, my darling! — A woman called for the little girl, apparently the mother.

She leaned a little and kissed the redheaded’s forehead, with gratitude.

— Thank you for taking care of her for me, Ahiru! We’re going to head home now. Say goodby to Ahiru, my love.

Uzura hugged Ahiru’s leg, who kissed her cheek, waving a goodbye right after.

When the two where gone, she sighed, watching all the couples dancing around.

She really looked disappointed, and Fakir thought a face like hers never should hold such a melancholic expression.

She should be dancing around the campfire, showing everyone her brightness, but the sudden thought of somebody dancing with her gave his heart a little ache of jealousy. What was this, what on earth was happening to him?

“Maybe I should ask her for a dance?”

He almost laughed at the thought. What? How could he even think about it? She was literally glowing, a angel in earth and he thought he could ask her to dance?

Oh God, no way, simply no way.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t even saw when she stood by his side in the booth.

— Excuse me, may I have a cup of camomile tea? — she gently ordered to a waiter.

— Right up, madam!

Now that she was close he could see her freckles better and so, her pretty face. She was smaller than him, even if she was in high heels.

When she decided to sit in a chair at the counter, her feet slipped in the bar of the dress. She was falling and then, Fakir held her by the wrist.

Startled, she widened her eyes. Fakir helped Ahiru to stand and sit in the chair

— Hey, are you ok? — he asked, clearly worried about her ankle.

— Ah, y-yes, I’m all right! Sorry about it, I’ve always been a klutz!

He gave her a little smile.

— Never mind about it.

Ahiru looked at him and his cup of coffe. Her face became confused.

— You seen to be a bit lonely in here. You didn’t came with anyone?

He sighed and crossed his arms

— Well, I came to this party partially forced and I even ended up being a third wheel! — he laughed lightly — For real, Mytho and Rue gonna pay me for this.

Ahiru’s eyes widened.

— Wait, you know them? Ah, so you are the friend who they would like me to meet! — she smiled and reached out her hand in front of her body — Nice too meet you, I’m Ahiru Arima!

He smiled back and squeezed her hand.

— Fakir Lohengrin, it’s a pleasure.

Again, she looked surprised.

— Wait, what? So you are THE Fakir Lohengrin? Oh My God, It’s a honor to meet you! I’ve been a fan of yours since “The Knight’s Sword”! It’s a history so full of emotion, romance and drama! I simply love all of your works and can’t wait for your next one!

He couldn’t help the blush to paint his cheeks. Could she be more adorable?

— Wow, thanks! Usually, people think my works are to happy, but I don’t like giving my characters a tragic finale. All of them deserve a happy ending.

She smiled so brightly that made his face feel hot.

— I think the same!

They spent a very long time chatting. She was a professional ballerina, but for now, she was dedicating her time to teach ballet to little kids. She really was a amazing person, a true inspiration.

While they were talking, the orchestra started playing a new song. Fakir knew the song. Of course he did, everybody there knew the pas de deux of The Swan Lake.

He heard Ahiru dreamy sigh when the music started to play.

— Oh my God, I haven’t thought the would play ballet songs in here! I love this Pas de Deux so much!!!

— Personally, I think this is one of the most beautiful pas de deux of all.

— So do I! It’s so touching!

He saw the way she was looking at the couples dancing. Well, why not? He was wanting that since he first saw her anyway.

— So — he started as he stood up — shall we dance?

She smiled and giggled, reaching for his hand.

— Let’s go!

They danced together and he couldn’t even describe the feeling. Not even one story he wrote before had a scene like the one was happening.

One of his hands on her waist and the other one holding her soft and petit hand. The touch of her hand in his neck while they danced all around the place was making his heart run wild in his chest. She smiled at him, never breaking the visual contact.

Fakir guided her through the place, spining around.

When the music (sadly) was over, they awkwardly departed and averted eyes, blushing.

— S-so, would you like to search for Rue and Mytho? — she suggested, tangling her fingers.

— Y-yeah, good idea.

They just agreed about it when they saw a black haired woman waving for them

— Hey, Fakir! — Rue called, waving at his direction — we were...

And then, she locked her eyes on Ahiru. She opened a smile and jumped to hug her.

— Ahiru!!! Oh my, you just disappeared, I couldn’t find you anywhere!

Ahiru hugged Rue tightly, smiling.

— Rue! I’m so glad to find you! I’ve been lost for a while in here, and then, I found miss Edel with Uzura.

The black haired woman stared at Fakir and grimaced.

— Hm... I see you’ve already meet Fakir, huh?

She nodded and smiled happily.

— Yes, I did! Why haven’t you told me he was my favorite writer?

Ok, this “Favorite writer” plus the sweet smile in her face was more than Fakir could handle. His face became red and he looked away.

Rue saw it and couldn’t hold her laugher back.

— Well, you are always talking about how amazing his books are, how you love his writing that I’ve decided to suprisse you!

Now Ahiru was blushing. She jumped in Rue, grabbing her shoulders nervously.

— Rue! Keep quiet, will you?

Rue laughed again and blinked to Fakir.

— And what about you? Did you find any muse while you’re here?

He just wanted to hide his face. Was it to obvious?

— I wouldn’t say I didn’t... — he replied, indifferent.

Rue nodded happily and turned her back, waving.

— So, I’ll tell Mytho I’ve found you guys. Let’s meet again at 22:00, ok?

They didn’t even have the time to agree and then, she was gone.

Ahiru coughed, attracting his attention.

— So, how’s your new book going?

Fakir sighed, defeated.

— Well, I thought it was going ok, but recently, I’m having a horrible block. That’s why they brought me to this party. Mytho said it would be good for me to find some inspiration.

Ahiru smiled again. God, why was she always smiling like this?! So pretty!

— Oh, so I guess now you’ll be able to write again! This festival gives all of us inspiration.

He smiled at her. If only she knew....

— So, would you like to take a look in how’s it going?

She blinked, surprised.

— Wait, you mean your book?!

He giggled, nodding. She just smiled and gave him a hug.

— Oh My God! Yes, I’d love to read your work!

He was completely startled and absolutely happy in this moment. Sadly, she pulled back to quick.

— S-so, do you like coffe??

Ahiru wondered a little and nodded.

— Hmm, yes, but I prefer a nice and sweet cappuccino.

— Oh, is that so? — so adorable, it suits her — I know a good café that has a delicious cappuccino, so, If you’d like, we can go there and discuss somethings. I think you would be a great help for me.

She smiled at his red face and giggled.

— Yeah, of course! I would love to help you! Let’s meet there tomorrow!

Looking at her face, Fakir realized.

The bright light of hers dispelled the fog inside his life. She was warmth that he needed.

@fyeahfakiruweek

[anshiva]

Diabolik Lovers Zero Floor.2 Translation

Another translation. If you find any mistakes, please let me know. Enjoy!   You can listen it here.

Track 1. Disappeared familiars *footsteps, crows cawing* Kou: We’ve come all this way, but this forest has no end. Looks like it’s getting denser and denser. It’s a bit dark here, so be careful. Don’t let go of my hand. Kou: Yeah, watch out. After all, you’re not used to walking in a demon world. Kou: Actually, this is my first time here. It looks like an unremarkable forest, but all the Ruki’s familiars disappeared here. There must be something here. Kou: Ha-ha, don’t be so scared. Your reliable lover is right by your side. Kou: I heard that a few magical creatures live in this area. Сome to think of it, if it were dangerous here, Ruki would have stopped us. Although sending me to explore the forest… Ruki works his younger brother too hard. Kou: He-he, well, yes, but I thought if I went, you would go with me too. And in the end it happened. We came here on our date under the guise of exploring. Kou: Yes, I know. I also wonder what happened here. Kou: It doesn’t look like Ruki’s familiars ran away. While we are on a date, we need to carefully explore everything. *crunch* Kou: Eh? What? M-kitten, you are a coward. You just stepped on a branch. Kou: Damn, it’s because you’re a coward. Are you too scared? You hurt my feelings when you scared in front of me. Kou: He-he, ok. If you give me your blood, I will forgive you. Kou: Yes, right here. Do not worry, we have walked so much, but we haven’t found any bats. It’s not dangerous here. Besides, you can do nothing on a date. Kou: We will continue the exploration when we finish. Well, what you say? Kou: Hee-hee, thanks. Then let’s get started right away. Nobody here but us now. It makes me happy to think that no one will disturb us. Kou: So where I should drink? From your neck? From your shoulder? From the upper arm? Ha, the wrist will do. Kou: What? I just ran my finger and you’re already trembling? You’re so cute, m-kitten. When you react so sincere, I want to tease you more, but I can’t stand it for long, so I will drink from the neck first. Kou: You know, your sweet scent strengthened. What, you wanted fangs? Kou: Oh, really? Well, okay. I can found out that by tasting the blood. *bites and drinks blood* [04:00] Kou: Ah, after all, your blood is sweet and tasty. But why is the taste richer than usual? And why do you have a sleepy look? Kou: If you can’t say, then let me tell you? You were very pleased when I stuck my fangs, right? More pleasant than when I drank blood at home. Apparently, you like to do dirty things when we’re deep in the forest. You’re so lustful, m-kitten. Kou: Eh? When you realize that you’re outside, you started wanting that more? Hmm, well, I’ll drink some more. Since my dear m-kitten asking me, I must fulfill her request. Where should I drink now? This trembling throat is so appetizing. Hey, look over here. *kissed* Kou: Ha-ha, you were surprised? But you like to kiss me, right? You have not only an obedient body but also a heart. I want to fill you with myself so that you don’t think about anything else. Kou: Heh, you finally trusted me. Or kisses wasn’t enough? You’re greedy, m-kitten. But don’t worry, I will carefully drink from here. The earlobe is so soft and comfortable to bite. It may be a little painful, but you don’t mind it? It would be more satisfying for you. Kou: Because I’m still good at teasing you. It is useless to pretend that you don’t like it. *bites and drinks* Kou: When I stick my fangs, your blood immediately becomes sweet. You still like pain. Kou: Hee, I know that. After all, your partner is me. Kou: You got so hot. Cutie. *kisses* Kou: How nice to flirt when no one bothers you. Where should I bite now? Kou: What, already? Well, nothing can be done. Then one last thing, ok? *kisses* Kou: Hmm, that’s all. And I won’t leave this wound without attention either. *kisses* Hm? I’m healing the wounds. But there’s still a red marks. Kou: Oh, come on. This is evidence that you are mine. Kou: I didn’t overdo at all. Besides doing this on a date is normal. Kou: Yes, I know. Let’s start exploring. But if soon we find nothing, then we will return home, ok? Ruki said that we don’t go further into the forest. Kou: Hm? What? *crow cawing* Kou: What’s that over there? [08:10] *door opens* Kou: Excuse me, is anybody here? No answer. Kou: Hmm, it looks like there are no visitors or staff. At the entrance was a sign says “Art Gallery”, but it’s pretty dilapidated, and probably no longer works. Maybe some aristocrat built it for his own pleasure, and then he lost interest and abandoned gallery. Although it’s strange that the candlesticks are burning. But the strangest thing is… portraits lined up in a dense row that covers a whole wall. Men, women, even children. There are so many… Is this normal? Someone has a terrible taste. Kou: I wonder if that huge portrait is the person who built this gallery? I never understood the tastes of aristocrats. And I don’t want to understand. Kou: Do you think so too, m-kitten? If you’re scared, then let's get out of here… but since we found this place, we probably should explore it too. Kou: M? What happened? Kou: What is it? You have a pale face, did you find something? Kou: What? How? Wait! That’s me? Why is my portrait hanging here? Kou: Eh? I think he looked at me. I saw something that shouldn’t. Kou: Yes, everything is okay. There are a lot of lookalikes, don’t worry so much. Let’s take a quick look and go back home, ok? I don’t want to stay here for long. Let’s go? *go away* Kou: It’s not often you come across people who look like me. Then what painting is that? Track 2. The pain that brings anger *door opens* Kou: M? Compared to the previous room, here is a completely different atmosphere. Despite the fact that there are also many paintings on the wall. Kou: M? Look over there! The picture is glowing! Apparently, it reflects the light from the candlesticks. Kou: Glass painting? Can it be made of glass? So that’s why it sparkles so much! Wow! Kou: What a… divine woman. That cathedral glass fits her very nicely. Hee-hee, maybe it’s strange to hear that from a vampire? Kou: And this picture is so cool! Beautiful color, as if a blue sky was captured in a picture. So elegant and very beautiful. Kou: You’re right. I thought portraits were the worst thing. But these are lovely. Kou: The gallery is bigger than I thought. It seems that glass paintings fill the entire hall far ahead. And their pale light is just wonderful. Kou: Yeah, I know! It’s sad that no one will come to see them. *fake Kou appears* Fake Kou: Same here. Kou: Eh? That’s impossible! Fake Kou: He-he, apparently I scared you. Although I expected that. Kou: Why me… Who are you? Fake Kou: As you can see, I’m you. Kou: It can’t be! Fake Kou: Ha-ha-ha! You’re so funny when you’re nervous. But I understand you. Anyone would get nervous when he met a man with exactly the same body, face, and eyes. Fake Kou: And your girlfriend turned as pale as a ghost. Perfect. I want to make her face twist even more. Fake Kou: What? How rude. Do you really not understand who I am? We recently met our gazes. Kou: Met gazes? That portrait? Fake Kou: Yes, you are right! I’m a portrait. I walked out of that picture and now stand here. Kou: Bullshit… Pictures can’t move… Fake Kou: Do you want to say that this is impossible? But the trouble is that’s possible. I’m moving right in front of you. Stop making that stupid face and accept the reality. But, you know, it’s unusual to see a vampire paired with a human. Who is this girl for you? And also this suffocating sweet scent… Ah, I wanted to bite her right now. [03:15] Kou: Hide behind me. And stay close to me. I don’t like him at all! Fake Kou: Hey, we just met and you’re being rude. But it’s okay. Today I’m in a good mood, so I will forgive you. Because such appetizing food came by here. The gallery is also happy. New paintings will be added to its collection. Kou: What are you talking about? Fake Kou: Oh, sorry, I didn’t tell you. This gallery is a bit special. Simply said, it’s alive. It feeds on visitors like you. Kou: Feeds on? Is this building alive? Fake Kou: Ha-ha, that face! You thought that living art galleries don’t exist? Erroneous guess. As evidence, there are records of eaten visitors. Do you saw a bunch of pictures when you came here? Kou: It can’t be! All those portraits… Were they all killed here? Perhaps Ruki’s familiars too? Fake Kou: Familiars? Are you talking about those bats with letters? A lot of them came to this forest, but as soon as they decided to hide from the rain in my territory, I enjoyed eating them all. I didn’t need their letters and I wanted to get rid of them. Here! *letters fall* Kou: Ah… Ruki’s letters… Fake Kou: Such being the case, I’ll eat you both. Kou: Run! *runs away* I can’t believe it, he ate Ruki’s familiars! He is dangerous! We must run away from here! *fake Kou teleported* Fake Kou: Uh-oh, stay where you are. Kou: What?! Fake Kou: Sorry, I can’t let you escape. Do you think you can get away from me? Kou: We will run away from you at all costs. Fake Kou: Oh, you pale as death, but behave like a hero. Maybe you’re trying to be cool, but, honestly, it looks pathetic. Besides, you are so carefully holding your food by the hand… Guys like you irritate me. Really irritates. Fake Kou: Oh, by the way. It seems that you liked that glass picture very much. Said it looks like a blue sky. Since you liked it so much, go to your favorite picture! *hit Kou, he bumps into the picture* Kou: Ahh! How dare you? Don’t underestimate me! Fake Kou: Actually, that’s my line. It seems you’ve touched the glass picture? Kou: Eh? *picture starts to suck in Kou * What? What is it? I’m drowning! Fake Kou: Ha-ha-ha! Surprised? These paintings can capture everything that touches them. And then you get trapped in a glass cage. Kou: AAA! [06:34] Kou: What is it? *hits the glass* It’s impossible… What is going on?! *run up to the picture* Don’t! Do not touch the glass! Fake Kou: Everyone who touch these pictures all together get sealed inside the glass picture with magic, so it is not so easy to break like ordinary glass. So I have nothing left but to catch you. Kou: Stop! Don’t touch her! Fake Kou: Ha-ha-ha! Aha-ha-ha! Nice to hear how you whining. But it pisses me off when someone crying too much. At such moments I can kill, breaking the picture. Fake Kou: He-he, you ask me to stop? If you really want me to stop, then be obedient. If you run away, he will remain here like this. *takes your hand* Fake Kou: So maybe feed you first? See that canvas over there? This is the mouth of the gallery. If you get inside the picture, you will be eaten. Kou: Stop! Fake Kou: He-he, you’ll melt like paint. *pushes you* Kou: Stop it!!! *sound of flow of electricity, picture pushes off you* Kou: What? Fake Kou: Ah? Why? Is picture pushed her away? Impossible… That never happened. It ate both demons and humans. *walk over to you, pick you up* Hey, answer! Apparently, this is your fault. What did you do? Fake Kou: You’re lying. You’re nervous, so you’re hiding something. You’re some kind of special, that’s why it couldn’t eat you. Oh, by the way, that sugary scent… It’s the scent of blood, right? You don’t look like an ordinary human. Fake Kou: Oh, that face… Am I correct? Oh, I see. You have special blood. In that case, if it didn’t work out this way, maybe I can eat you? Kou: Wait! Do you mean… Fake Kou: Of course, I’m talking about drinking blood. All blood. Kou: Damn! I’m not going to let you do that! *hits the glass* Fake Kou: Ah, listen. Do you even realize that space is created by magic? Whether you live or die is up to me. *use magic* Kou: AAAAA! Nh! Aah! * falls * Fake Kou: Ah, he fainted. If you had been a little bit smarter, you wouldn’t have suffered. *you start to resist* Fake Kou: I didn’t say you can resist. You vex me terribly. *press to the wall* You don’t get until you get pinned up against the wall like this? You are a food placed on a plate! Well, it troublesome so get down to business right away. Probably, I should drink blood from the neck. I’d like to know how you taste. *kisses* Fake Kou: Listen, you’re trembling. That’s funny. You’re so scared that I will drink your blood, even though I look exactly like him. Fake Kou: Hmm, so copy just the appearance is useless. Well, whatever. It’s very helpful to be in this form. After all, no one can kill an exact copy of himself or his friend. Even if it’s a portrait. That’s how I catching my prey. No one has escaped. And you also have nowhere to run. Fake Kou: You say that again? Then I will punish the naughty girl. Thrust fangs deeply and with all my strength into you. And make you writhe in pain. *bites and drinks blood* [11:26] Fake Kou: What is it? So sweet! He-he-he-heh, I can drink this delicious blood as much as I like. *resist* Haven’t you given up yet? How annoying. If you behave like this, then, probably, I can break him into pieces. Like this! *uses magic, breaks the glass* Fake Kou: Ha-ha! What a face! It was the neighboring picture! You thought he was really dead? Even stupid will understand that you shouldn’t go against me. Come on, say: “I won’t oppose you anymore. Do whatever you want to me.” Can you say that? Fake Kou: Ha, your frightened face is driving me crazy. Since you said that, I will reward you. I will drink harder than before. Maybe I should drink from the heart next? Then the blood will flow like a fountain. *you give him a slap* Fake Kou: Ha! So, you defy me again. Well, you’re such an idiot. Fake Kou: It’s too late to fix something. It remains only to train your body. Oh, right. Very handy. *took a piece of glass* Fake Kou: I’ll make wounds to you with this shard of glass. Fake Kou: Do you think you have the right to refuse? Actually, this glass has broken because of you. Aren’t you going to take responsibility for that? Fake Kou: Hmm, you want me to stop. He-he-he-he, I won’t stop. *tears clothes* He-he, what a fool you are. When you don’t like, I want to make even more unpleasant. Ah, clothes ripped to pieces. And the face is wet. The voice trembles and tears flow. But your tortured look is so exciting. Just so you know, for now, I’m only ripping clothes. The most fun is just about to start. Now I will shred all your body with this glass. Fake Kou: I guess, I’ll cut your arm first so that you can see. Look, if I put the glass on your arm and slowly move it… Fake Kou: Ha-ha, blood ran down. It smells good. But not feeling so sugary as before anymore. Apparently, when I take away your blood like this, you become an ordinary person. In this case, you can finally become a meal for the gallery. Rejoice. *blood is dripping* Fake Kou: Oh, blood is dripping. *drinks* Mh, such a small wound is not enough. I’ll gouge it with my fangs. I will dig them deep, really deep. Slowly and gradually. *bites and drinks blood* Fake Kou: Ah, the taste of blood has changed. Heh, bitterness is good too. Fake Kou: Ah? What? I can’t hear you. I can’t stop. I said from the very beginning that I would drink all of your blood to the last drop. Fake Kou: He-he, your pale face is so pathetic. Come on, this is not the end. Where should I drink now? Cry with pain as much as you can. If I get bored, I’ll kill you instantly. *drinks blood* Track 3. Your sweet scent. Fake Kou: Ah, finally the sweet scent started to fade. Looks like now you can be thrown in the canvas. Fake Kou: Aha-ha, you’re so tired. You were fighting like hell. But it’s your fault. If you were an ordinary human, I could throw in the picture and you immediately feel relieved. Kou: Mh… Ah… Run! *hits the glass* Faster! *hit again* Fake Kou: Ah? What, you are just now waking up? Unfortunately, this girl can no longer move. Besides, she says that she can’t escape. Kou: Ha… Why? Fake Kou: Hey, he asks why. Answer him. Kou: I don’t believe that… You should have left me and run. Kou: You say it again… You will never leave me… no matter what I do to you… no matter what. That’s why I liked you. Fake Kou: Hmm, good for you. So? What is this love scene all about? I’m sick of you and this girl. That’s right! I’ll show you something interesting. I will drink her blood in front of you. Kou: What?! *hits the glass* Don’t touch her! *hits the glass* Fake Kou: Shut up! Do you want to feel pain again? This glass won’t break, Don’t waste your breath. Watch with envy how I’ll drink all her blood. Fake Kou: Come on, scream in pain. So he feels everything. Kou: Stop it! *hits the glass* Let her go! *hits the glass* Fake Kou: I’ll bite off, so scream with your sweet voice. Kou: Let her go! *hits the glass, glass cracks* Fake Kou: What?! It can’t be! Kou: Let her go!!! *breaks the glass* Fake Kou: Impossible… The glass painting is broken! Kou: Ahh! Give me back my darling! *hits fake Kou* Fake Kou: Nh… Damn… Kou: Run! Don’t worry, I’ll hold you and run by myself. *pick you up* Let’s go! *ran away* [03:00] Kou: Everywhere you look, there are only glass paintings all around. It’s just like a maze. We can hide here, but the exit is nowhere to be seen. Kou: I think we lost him. Probably he loses sight of us. I’ll put you on the ground. *put down* Kou: Sorry… for not being able to save you right away. *you stroke him* Kou: Oh, that hand? Yes, it covered in blood, but I am a vampire. This is nothing. Although I have a strange sensation of pain because of the magic, forget about me. Bite marks were left on your arm. *kisses your hand* Kou: The taste has changed. Is it because he drank your blood? It’s just like you isn’t you anymore. Kou: Listen, when you were about to be thrown into the picture, I’m sure I’ve seen how the canvas pushed you away. As he said, your blood is special, perhaps it saved you. In this case, your current consciousness is in poor condition. Because your usually sweet scent weakens. If somebody tries to throw you into the picture again, then this time it will definitely work. Kou: Listen, let me drink your blood. You haven’t forgotten, have you? The more I drink your blood, the sweeter it becomes. In that case, he can’t throw you into the picture. I won’t let him take you away. I’m begging you. Kou: Thank you. Don’t worry, I’ll make you feel good, so leave everything up to me. Is he done that? This wound looks awful too. It hurts, right? Kou: You don’t have to act strong. I’ll remove his bite marks. I’m on it. *drinks blood* Kou: Feel good? Okay. Then I won’t hold back and corrupt you with these fangs, as I usually do. Kou: Good reaction. You are really greedy for pleasure. And sensitive to my words too. When I just move my hand across your body like this… Oh, look, you are already out of breath. Kou: Tch! I’m sorry, but keep your voice down. Hey, did you notice? The scent of blood starts to become sweeter. Well done! Forget everything, I’ll do everything. Kou: Now, maybe drink from the thin and soft inside of this wrist? But before that, I need to heal the wound on your arm. *kisses* Kou: Come on, keep your voice low. Was it feel good? Then I will move to the wrist like this. *kisses* Feel where I touch you. *kisses* Kou: Keep your voice down. Well done. But, probably, you can’t wait? You have tearful eyes. Kou: In that case, I will reward you for being a good girl, and drink the blood as you wished. I will slowly drink from the wrist. Feel how fangs sink into the flesh. *bites and drinks* [07:50] Kou: Ah… Sweet. And still rich. You look tired. Your breath became hot. Do you feel so good? It seems I can’t stop. And you are good at teasing me. And the final touch. Look at me. Open your eyes wide. *kissed* Kou: You look so greedy. You really greedy m-kitten, but put it off till later.   Kou: You’re back to normal. Again became the owner of the blood that seduces us. He should have smelled that scent. I’m sure he is heading here. Kou: Don’t panic. Listen, I will distract him, and you run to the exit. Kou: He won’t be able to immediately touch you, because he couldn’t throw you into the picture. I’m in his way, so he has to do something with me first. And you take a moment and run! Get out of here! If you can get in touch with Ruki and the others, they will save you. Kou: Me? No, I’ll figure something out. I catch him off guard and deftly run away from him. Kou: Eh… And why in those moments your intuition serves you well? You’re right. I don’t think I can beat him. Did you see all those portraits that adorn the walls? There were so many of them, and no one could get out of here. I’m crazy if I think that I will beat him, but I will let you run away. Kou: What other options do we have? Kou: Mh… Don’t give up, you say? Good words. You’ve told me this before. But in our situation, the two of us don’t… *someone’s footsteps* Ah! So you came. Track 4. I will choose freedom with these shackled hands. Fake Kou: Hi! Hide-and-seek is over. The sweet aroma became too strong and I immediately noticed it. Fake Kou: Right, thanks to the returned sweet scent that give off a strong smell. Hey, what that’s mean? Kou: Who knows. Fake Kou: Oh, is this your doing? Maybe I should have got rid of you before I start to eat her. In that case, I’ll hurt you even more. Fake Kou: “Stop it”, “do not”… I’m already tired of hearing that. Being a meal it’s all you’re good for, so shut up! That’s right! Too bad I have to waste it on you two, but I will use them. Look around! It is full of glass paintings! If they all break, their sharp pieces become weapons. Like this! *glasses cracks* Kou: Ha! Step back! *loud sound of glass shattering, shards burrowing into Kou* Ah! Kh… Ah… *falls* Fake Kou: Ha-ha-ha! You look like ragged clothes. Kou: Ah… I’m fine, so… you go away… Fake Kou: He-he, you’re all tattered, and you still want to protect her. I do not understand why you resist so much? Fake Kou: If gallery eats you, you’ll become beautiful paintings that will decorate it. Painted pictures always remain beautiful. What you don’t like? Kou: Remain beautiful? Fake Kou: Exactly! You can always enjoy a people who visited that gallery and now inside the frames. Is that not happiness? Rejoice, I will make you pride of this gallery. Kou: Inside the picture… forever… I want to cry from such a life. Fake Kou: Ah? Did you say something? Kou: We are not pictures! Lock people inside the picture, forever leaving them beautiful, and make out of them a work of art, decorating the gallery with them, only to please the eye… And you call this happiness? Are you kidding me! *stand up* I won’t let her go through that! Fake Kou: What is that insolent look? And in such a situation, you dare to talk to me so arrogantly. Kou: I dare! And I will say it again! Because I understand it better than anyone else! In the past, I was locked up in a more dilapidated place. I was beautiful, so they made me into a toy. And I wasn’t happy there. But it’s different now. I learned about the outside world, met her… fell in love… and finally find a way to live as who I really am. Freedom is better, even if it’s hateful, even if it’s unpolished, but it’s better than being locked up forever beautiful. Kou: You’re right, I can’t give up. We’ll be back home together and live happily again as before. I will never give up. Let’s get out of here together! Fake Kou: What? Are you stupid? You have no choice! You just have to be eaten by the gallery and become its exhibits. Kou: I don’t want to live with my head bowed in front of this musty gallery! Fake Kou: Tut! Know your place, food! *grabbed Kou* Enough! I won’t even feed you to the gallery. I lock you in a glass picture like before and smash it to smithereens! *press to the wall* Ha-ha, you’re out of breath! You just acted like a hero, but can’t free yourself from the hands that grab you. Kou: Nh… Ah… Cough… Damn… Fake Kou: And you stay there and watch how he will turn into glass pieces. And then I’ll drink plenty of your blood, and when you’re dry, I will feed you to the gallery. It’s a pity, but you tried so hard. Kou: Nh… That’s I… pity you… My fake! *pushes fake Kou* Fake Kou: Ha! Kou: The one who will be locked in a glass picture is you! *pushes, fake Kou he touches the picture* Fake Kou: Ah… Wait! *sucks into the picture* Kou: Sink into the picture! You don’t have to worry, I’m fine. It didn’t hurt so much. His carelessness saved me. Fake Kou: *hits the glass* Shit! How dare you fool me! I will torture you until you lose your mind! You will regret what you’ve done! Kou: Regret, you say? The light of candlesticks is reflected in the picture and sparkling. Now you’re locked in a picture, forever remaining beautiful, and become an exhibit… Tell me, do you feel happy there? Fake Kou: Shut up!!! I’ll get out of here right now! Kou: Even you realize that there is no happiness over there. Listen, if you break the glass picture, everything inside it will die? *approaches* Fake Kou: Ah… You… You can’t do this! You won’t kill yourself! You can’t kill me! Kou: I can. You are now is like a little me. I was kept in a cage, I was tormented, writhing… I was used for someone’s perverted pleasure. I constantly dreamed of that hell. But now it has come to an end. She put an end to this. So goodbye. Fake Kou: No… Stop! I can’t afford to end it here… *glass shattering* Ah… AAA! Kou: I can’t either. Kou: Sorry to keep you waiting. Can you go? We leave. *takes your hand* Kou: Yeah, it seems fine. I’m so happy. There is no way in hell I would let anyone lock you up. The blue sky fits you better than this dark place. Kou: Yeah, right. This place doesn’t fit me either. He really smashed to pieces. The glass may have shattered, but it still reflects the light. A beautiful thing even when it breaks remains beautiful. But it doesn’t look happy at all. Kou: So, let’s go home! Ruki… Everyone is waiting for us. *go away* Track 5. The portrait broke into pieces *Kou enters the room* Kou: End of report. Oh, I’m tired. *fall on the bed* Ruki was amazed at my story. Kou: Yeah, I could tell by his face that he couldn’t believe that paintings were moving. But after seeing the letters that we returned, it seems he believed me. He said that he would take measures so that no one else would become a victim of that gallery. If the familiars disappear again, there will be problems. Kou: And I felt relieved too. Well, he smashed to pieces, I think everything is fine. But still… ah… Kou: M? Just think that we were used. Our date turned into a nightmare. I probably got various psychological problems and for some time won’t be able to return to normal. Kou: Hmm… Hey, are you worrying about me so much? Then give me your blood. If you give me blood, I think my mind and body will recover. Okay? Kou: He-he, thanks. By the way, since we returned, we were busy and didn’t have time to talk. Haven’t you been waiting for that? Tell me where do you want me to drink? Kou: Eh? I haven’t done anything yet, and you’re already trembling. Just one my voice thrilled you? Your ears are really sensitive. Kou: Then I’ll start from ears. I wonder what will happen with sensitive m-kitten? *bites and drinks blood* Kou: He-he, your embarrassed voice get out. When I bite through your skin with my fangs, does it hurt? Or it feels good? Kou: No need to hide it, I will understand everything by the taste of blood. Sweet, rich and very tasty. Still, it’s exactly what you wanted. You are so lustful, m-kitten. Kou: Your eyes are wet. Now, there is just you and me, so you can be more open. Look, I’ll stroke your throat, and then you purr. You’re a cat, so ask me sweetly. *strokes you* Kou: He-he, now you’ve become obedient. Good. I will let you fully enjoy my fangs. I’ll slowly play with you. *bites and drinks* Kou: Blood became sweet again. Oh, you felt good. When you are swallowed up by pleasure, you are so cute. And the scent of blood quickly becomes sweet… Kou: Ah… Sorry, just remembered something. Listen, do you remember? When in the gallery you were about to be thrown into the picture, but it pushed you away. Kou: Then, I thought you were saved because of your special blood. When I think about this, it seems that gallery rejected you. I have a feeling that it realized that I didn’t want someone to take you away from me. Kou: He-he, but it’s unlikely. We are talking about that art gallery. Kou: Your smile, your tears, your embarrassed look - everything belongs to me. I won’t give you to anyone. No matter how difficult it would be, I won’t let this happen. I promise I will never give up again. Kou: Ah, I love you. Let’s always be together. *kissed*

[florrickandassociates]

TGF Thoughts: 2x13-- Day 492

FINALLY DONE WRITING THIS. Recap under the cut! Also, as soon as I post this, I’m going to work on updating my meta page where you can find links to posts about EVERY SINGLE EPISODE of TGW and TGF. 

Dear writers: I’ll forgive Timeline Fuckery when it’s beyond your control. I understand that you’re shooting outdoor scenes in March/April when in the show it’s supposed to be late May, so there’s snow on the ground and everyone’s in coats. Fine. You can’t change the weather. And I understand that the Day ### titles are more symbolic than literal. But what’s your excuse for opening this episode with the date (May 27th, 2018) when you didn’t need to?

For one, May 27th, 2018 is a Sunday—and thus not a work day. Any calendar will tell you this. For another, Lucca goes into labor “two weeks early,” we’re told. In 2x06, she said the birth date was scheduled for May 22nd. Why do you do this, writers?! You didn’t have to give dates. You didn’t have to OPEN THIS EPISODE WITH THE DATE. And, if you’re going to use dates, at the very least, write them down somewhere!!!!

See, now I’m starting off the episode in Nitpick Mode (to be fair, I am usually in Nitpick Mode) when I could be starting off the episode simply happy to see the wonderful Lucca Quinn.

Lucca’s in court arguing a case about filming in Chicago. We saw this client earlier in the season—he’s the one who thought Lucca kept needing to use the bathroom.

Lucca and opposing counsel are standing really close to each other and I don’t know why.

Maia’s on this case now, too.

Lucca stops mid-sentence because… she’s going into labor! The client thinks she has to pee, then he thinks it’s a lawyerly trick (Lucca screams in pain as she says “all white facilities!!” which is hilarious).

The judge asks if Lucca needs a moment. She pretends she doesn’t, but that lasts all of a second before she screams “Yes! Yes! Recess! FUCK! Fuck!” and grabs opposing counsel to stable herself. Ah, that’s why he was standing so close to her.

Now Maia’s speeding through the city, with Lucca in the passenger seat with her legs up. Lucca complains about all the cases she’d planned to work on this week as Maia frantically pushes buttons on a cellphone. Bluetooth, Maia. Use Bluetooth and then you can keep both hands on the wheel and look at the road.

Maia has, and is using, Lucca’s phone, and Lucca doesn’t know it. Does Lucca not have a passcode?

Maia calls Colin and instead gets Francesca because I guess Lucca’s number for Colin is not his cell but rather… his mom’s house? But I don’t care, because Francesca is in the practice of answering her home phone with, “Morello Residence, Down with Trump.” I know Colin’s not going to be a regular next season, but can we keep Francesca around as a guest star?

Francesca is shocked that Lucca’s in labor because she thought they were inducing in two weeks. Yes. Because babies always arrive exactly when you schedule them.

Next, Lucca wants to call Diane.

When Diane tells Julius that Lucca’s in labor, Marissa overhears and freaks out.

“Listen, can you take Lucca’s place on the Violence Committee?” Diane asks Julius. (Not going to find another associate to do it? Only a partner? I guess Lucca is doing very well.)

“No! I have to get to the hospital,” Marissa replies before Julius can say anything. This is so Marissa—thinking a question that is OBVIOUSLY not directed at her would be directed at her. “Not you! She means me,” Julius corrects, but Marissa’s already run off.

When did Marissa and Lucca become so close? I know Marissa/Maia/Lucca kind of have a Workplace Friendship Trio thing going, but I feel like we’ve had a lot of Marissa/Maia and a lot of Maia/Lucca, and not as much Marissa/Lucca. I’m accepting it only because I like the idea of the Workplace Friendship Trio and if the show wants to give me Marissa/Lucca scenes, it can go right ahead.

Diane, meanwhile, is being interviewed by FBI agents, one of whom is the Gravedigger from Bones/Rhonda Pearlman from The Wire. At first, it seems like a standard background check, since Kurt’s applying for a position with the FBI. But they seem to be fishing for something related to people who’ve spent the night at Diane’s apartment.

In the last 6 months, Maia spent a few days at Diane’s apartment during the scandal. What? Not only does that timeline not make sense, but shouldn’t we have seen it if Maia was staying with Diane instead of living behind a clock during the scandal? I’m more upset we were denied that than I am about the timeline. This season—and last season—needed more Diane/Maia scenes to make Maia’s presence feel necessary and believable.

As soon as the agents leave, the score from 6x01 kicks in and suddenly I’m having lots of Cary Agos feelings. Diane walks slowly down the hallway, caught up in her thoughts.

“Hey. Is Lucca really giving birth?” Liz stops her, overjoyed. Awww!

Diane asks Liz if she has a minute. She explains her situation with the FBI, says she’s worried about one of her answers, and then does that thing people on this show do where they exchange a dollar to hire a colleague as a lawyer. Then Diane tells Liz she’s worried about someone else who stayed overnight: Tully.

Diane calls the FBI agent and mentions other people who stayed in her apartment, then sneaks in Tully’s name.

LMAOOOOO GUYS THERE IS WHAT APPEARS TO BE A PORTRAIT OF COMEY IN THE BACKGROUND OF THIS SCENE AND HE HAS DEVIL HORNS AND AN EYEPATCH LOLLOLLOLLOLLOL

“You’re fine,” Liz tells Diane when she hangs up. Diane isn’t so sure.

A man talks directly into the camera. “Kill all lawyers. That’s been the anthem for six months of copycat killers and assaulters. Well, today that ends,” he says. That’s a little meta. He’s talking to Adrian and Julius, so I guess this is the violence committee that Lucca was meant to be on and now I wish we’d gotten to see it with Lucca.

The mayor’s put together a committee to address this. Apparently, the best people are on the committee. They’ll get to spend ten million dollars. When Adrian and Julius walk into the room, it’s not what they’d expect. It’s Trump Appointee Trig (incompetent judge), Mr. Elk (whose name is Ted Willoughby but I will forever call him Mr. Elk because of the time he said, “things of that elk”), and… wait for it… the Peter Florrick loving drama teacher. This show has never met a guest star it didn’t want to bring back. (Well, I suppose that’s a lie: there’s always Nick Savarese.)

Mr. Elk is now on Fox News, which doesn’t make sense given that he was introduced as someone who would be friendly towards the Florricks, but does make sense given… well, HIM.

Adrian and Julius quickly realize they’re in a room with a bunch of idiots, and they don’t mince words in saying so. Adrian literally calls them “functioning idiots”, which they are. (The drama teacher is the smartest of the three.)

Adrian’s advised to just go with it and persuade them.

Marissa runs through the hospital trying to find Lucca. When she arrives, Maia is on the phone with Colin, Francesca wants to know how Colin’s doing (no sense of urgency…), and Lucca wants drugs. Marissa cannot figure out how to use a door.

Colin’s now on his way to the airport. He swears out of frustration with the fact he’s not there. “God, it’s good to hear someone swear, other than me,” Lucca replies. “FUCKING HELL,” she exclaims in pain.

“COCKSUCKER!” Francesca replies. Maia, Marissa, and Lucca stare at her. “MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKER!” Marissa joins in. “Fucking asshole!” Maia says (she’s more hesitant than the others). Then they all start screaming cuss words and this is why streaming services exist, guys. To bring us hilarious scenes where women in maternity wards scream vulgarities at the top of their lungs.

Kurt’s being interviewed by the FBI next. First question is about the Rindell fund. Second is about the neighbor who spent the night. Third is Tully. They make a point of mentioning he stayed overnight. “Does this apartment have more than one bedroom?” they ask. Oof. They aren’t even trying to be subtle.

Diane’s at aikido and she has a missed call from Kurt and a mysterious letter in her bag. “Conspiracy carries a life sentence. If you want my help, leave a flower pot in your office window and I’ll meet you at your parking space,” it reads.

Diane asks Liz if she’s noticed the Trump mask people. “They dance, and have sex wearing Trump masks.” Liz doesn’t believe her. “I think that’s an insurance firm,” she laughs. Who knows, these days? (That’s the point!)

Then the phone rings. FBI again. They want to ask Diane a question in person.

The FBI agents aren’t thrilled to see that Diane’s brought along a lawyer. “This isn’t adversarial,” one says. Right. That’s what they always say.

Their question: Tully’s made threats against the president and wants to know what Diane knows. They won’t reveal their sources. And they’ve subpoenaed Diane to testify at a grand jury.

Back at the office, Diane picks up a vase of flowers and the camera follows it to the window. Once Diane sets down the vase, it morphs into the vase from the credits. Of course it does. Robert King directed this episode. (This isn’t as awesome as the graphic match in 5x01 (Alicia in profile) but it’s still pretty damn cool.)

The cast list for this episode is insanely fantastic.

The violence committee is exactly as farcical as you’d expect. Killer bees, fake news, a rendition of Annie Get Your Gun with puppies instead of guns… yeah.

Adrian’s idea: a gun buyback program. No one understands this (except maybe Julius). Trig instead wants an “I HEART LAWYERS” ad campaign. Oh my. Mr. Elk suggests a jingle, and No 1 Florrick Fan begins to sing. “I love lawyers. They’re employers.”

There’s calming music playing in Lucca’s hospital room now, but it’s not working. Oh, and Lucca’s mom’s on her way. Francesca’s excited to meet Lucca’s mother, and Lucca’s not at all excited.

Maia tries to change the subject to make Lucca feel better, and Marissa provides a new discussion topic: Lucca moving to D.C. Lucca says she’s not sure she’s going and Francesca acts like it’s a done deal.

Diane goes to her parking spot for her secret meeting. Her new friend announces herself with a ringtone that goes “Fuzzy fuzzy cute cute” because… the Kings wrote this episode.

Diane’s new friend—a young, well-dressed blonde—tells her she’s being targeted because of her firm’s involvement with the impeachment suit and the pee-pee tape. (Side note, I discovered a few days ago that two of my friends had never heard of the pee tape???? Sometimes I think I underestimate just how niche the audience for some of the jokes on TGW/F is.)

“So, what do I call you? Deep Throat?” Diane asks. “No, I don’t do deep throat. Just double penetration and girl-on-girl,” she replies. BWAH. “You’re a porn star?” Diane asks. “I direct now,” she replies. Diane starts to turn away, but New Friend has a point. Trump is terrified of her, and she’s covered by an NDA. “Follow the women,” she advises. The women are the weaknesses of powerful men. Diane looks around and she’s gone. Only not really, because she’s just made her exit to the wrong side of the parking garage and has to double back. Heh.

Liz finds Diane’s mysterious encounter hard to believe. “I know. I’ve spend the last six months in a haze of not knowing what was crazy and what was not. I still don’t know,” Diane states.

Jay shows up, asks about Lucca, and then switches over to helping Diane (continuity is good). Diane notes that the same prosecutor (though I thought he was an ICE agent last ep?) who tried to deport Jay is working on this. Looks like RBL is a target.

Jay’s task is to follow the women.

Tully pulls Diane aside before she testifies and gives her more talk about being rebellious. “Everything I said I am proud of,” Tully offers as an explanation for why he waived attorney-client privilege. The thing about people like Tully—and I don’t mean this because Tully is a radical but rather because Tully is an entitled asshole—is that they don’t care how their actions affect others. Does he care he’s making Diane’s life difficult? Nope.

“Now go give ‘em hell, gorgeous,” Tully says in closing. Adding “gorgeous” really endears me to him. (Just kidding, it makes me loathe him even more!)

Is there some sort of symbolism to Diane’s last name being Lockhart while the prosecutor’s is Basehart? Some kind of doubleing thing?

Diane puts on her Grand Jury face, but it doesn’t work for long because Tully is the worst and also surveillance is everywhere… including Diane’s bedroom. The prosecutor has a recording of Diane and Tully’s conversation about loaded guns from a few episodes back.

And it looks quite incriminating. Diane is pissed. She accuses Tully of taping it, and Tully says Diane has been bugged. Maybe they were listening through her cell phone like they used to listen to Alicia! This is Diane’s next thought too—maybe not the Alicia part, but the phone part—and she destroys her phone’s SIM card.

Jay thinks he’s found a woman to follow. It’s a good start.

“Is this the plan? Blackmailing him?” Liz wants to know. “Yes. Why?” Diane responds like it’s nothing. “Well, it just seems a little sleazy,” Liz warns. Aren’t you the one who suggested making up lies to impeach Trump? (I do not mind Liz being contradictory, because the very first thing we learned about Liz way back in season four of Wife is that she is very good at justifying the things she does while believing everyone else is in the wrong. This isn’t a strategy she concocted, of course she’d question it.) (Also it is sleazy. But not too much sleazier than other things that’ve happened on this show.)

“They’re out to destroy us. If ever there was a time for situational ethics, it’s now,” Diane adds. Did anyone else feel like this episode was dramatic but also not the most dramatic despite how high the stakes are? Maybe it’s just nine years of this or the lack of build-up to this episode or the fact that situational ethics are the bread and butter of this show. (Situational “ethics” perhaps because sometimes… yeah.)

Here’s a fun thought-starter: Imagine a The Good Fight/Wife crossover with The Good Place. Specifically, imagine how Chidi would react to this (or, honestly, any episode).

So I just mentioned lack of build-up, and I didn’t mean that (necessarily) as a bad thing because I think thematically the season was building towards this, and Tully’s been annoying me with his presence since episode 4. On the other hand, the stakes get very high very fast and that never makes it easy to fully understand and embrace just how bad things might be. A fast-paced episode of twists and turns is exhilarating to watch but it never makes me think about just how much all of this would weigh on a person. I’m not really thinking, “wow what would happen if Diane goes to jail” because I doubt that will happen, and I’m not really thinking about how Diane would experience this. Instead I’m thinking about ethics and how often powerful men are skeezeballs and surveillance. And I think the writers are probably more interested in those topics than they are in Diane.

I dunno, maybe it’s just me and my attachment to Alicia Florrick, but I just can’t get inside the minds of any of the TGF characters for more than a few minutes. Diane has been hard to read this season, for me, because so much of her plot is more the Kings reflecting on Trump than an arc for her (and the writers really wasted what was a good arc for her in season 1). Maia’s not interesting enough to spend time analyzing—she’s not inconsistent but I just do not care about her other than to insist that she spend more time working. Lucca and Liz are, I think, the characters I’ve found the most compelling this year… but I want to see more. 

What I loved most about The Good Wife was (obviously) Alicia’s journey. I was attached to the other characters, too, but not in the way I was attached to Alicia. And that was fine, because they were supporting characters who got just enough development that I could analyze their character arcs without feeling they were under-developed. And I LOVED the world TGW built and the questions it posed about structures and politics and technology and the present day. I still love that world.

I guess where I’m going with this is that TGF gives me a lot of things I love—mainly more of the TGW characters and world but adjusted for the Trump era—but it doesn’t deliver the same kind of character development. That’s fine. I don’t need TGF to have an Alicia; it’s a different show focused on an ensemble rather than one lead. I still love The Good Fight a lot and I think it’s great television. I just don’t feel the same connection to it that I felt to Wife.

I have no idea how I ended up on this topic. But I think where I’m going with this is that it would never take me three weeks to write a recap of even the most boring TGW episode, and I’ve been putting off writing this. I feel like I have much less to say about Fight than Wife, and most of the times I get carried away writing things that aren’t rants about Maia are times when I’m comparing the shows or… talking about Alicia, a character who was mentioned a total of one time in season 2. I’m sure part of this is that I’ve changed (when Wife was on, I was in college with lots of pockets of free time, a pretty small social life, a much more active fandom to participate in, etc.; now I work full time and don’t always feel like writing long recaps after a long day of work (and I also rarely start up my personal laptop anymore now that I don’t have to write papers), I have friends I see frequently, fandom is like four or five people these days), but I think most of it is that the show isn’t delivering the thing that motivated me to start writing these long-ass recaps.

… and another week has passed. How am I not finished with this yet?

The FBI agents are back for Kurt, along with Basehart. I’m distracted by two things in this scene: the flowers on the trees outside, because they look enough like cherry blossoms to remind me of BrainDead, and the fact that Alicia’s teal box with the white dots on it is for some reason in Diane’s living room. DON’T THINK I DIDN’T NOTICE.

The agents want to know about a gun that Kurt gave to Diane. Kurt, instead of answering, stands up and says “I have no more answers for you.” “Your wife is about to be indicted,” Basehart says. That’s new.

“I don’t like to swear, so understand this is purely for emphasis: Get the fuck out of our house. No. I mean it. Get the fuck out of our house,” Kurt yells at Basehart. Hee.

Kurt phones Diane, and Diane heads home.

In the Violence Prevention Committee, Mr. Elk is showing the others a clip from his show that I’ll call Elk & Friends. He explains that on Elk & Friends they’re told to address Trump because he watches.

Adrian’s almost convinced Florrick Fan to vote with him when Rahm’s advisor guy whose name I’ve forgotten because I started writing this a month ago adds someone new to the panel: a woman who works for the NRA. L O L

Lucca’s doctor arrives at the hospital looking for Lucca’s room. Francesca immediately hugs her, assuming that any black woman looking for Lucca must be Lucca’s mother. “I was just wondering whether your family is from Tanzania or Nigeria,” Francesca says as a greeting, which… oof. “I just got back from a luxury safari in Tanzania,” she adds. Of course she did.

“Here she is, safe and sound!” Francesca loudly announces to Lucca, Marissa, Maia, and… the woman who actually is Lucca’s mother. That’s when Lucca’s doctor finally has an opportunity to introduce herself.

“Oh! You’re not Lucca’s mom?” Francesca asks. “No, that’s me,” Deirdre Quinn says. They got Judith Light to play Lucca’s mom. This show has the best casting. “I don’t think I understand,” Francesca says because she does not understand that it is possible to be biracial.

“Put her out of her misery, mom,” Lucca chimes in. “Danny, we have someone who needs visual evidence,” Deirdre snarks. You can tell this has happened before.

“Hi. Danny Quinn,” Lucca’s father (who is black) introduces himself. “Now I see the resemblance!” Francesca responds because her default mode is casually racist. “I mean, not that there needed to be a resemblance,” she adds.

The doctor asks for some people to leave the room, so Maia and Marissa head back to work. (The captions identify Maia as saying “we have to get back to work” but, fittingly, it’s actually Marissa who says it.)

“Fuck!” Lucca exclaims, and Francesca dives right back in to screaming MOTHERFUCKER even though the only people who understand what she’s doing have already left. I love Francesca. She would drive me crazy. But she is so amusing.

Julius is on Adrian’s side in the Violence Prevention Committee. How long is it before Julius becomes a liberal?

NRA Lady insists that the problem isn’t just guns: a lawyer was also killed in a hit and run. “Majority were shot,” Adrian notes. NRA Lady says she likes the ad campaign but she wants to spend the money to arm and train lawyers. OF FUCKING COURSE SHE DOES, SHE WORKS FOR THE GODDAMN NRA.

NRA Lady has a video to show the men on the panel. It’s a woman in a bikini with a gun. Great point. Trig, Mr. Elk, and Florrick Fan all stand up to watch the informative video. “It was a very hot day, so they had to make do,” NRA Lady adds.

She also has a bullet proof briefcase, which totally would’ve helped Adrian… not. UGH.

At their apartment, Diane warns Kurt not to talk. They turn on loud music and Diane whispers to Kurt, “I think I’m being bugged.” They decide to talk on the computer instead. I would maybe opt for pen and paper here?

“FBI says you will be indicted.” Kurt writes. Diane takes the keyboard: “Grand jury questioning me again in one hour.” Kurt: “They asked me about your gun.” Diane: “What did you say?” Kurt: “Go to hell.” Diane: “I want to fuck you right now”.

UGH I LOVE THEM A LOT AND KURT NEVER CHEATED THAT NONSENSE DIDN’T HAPPEN BECAUSE LOOK AT HOW GOOD THEY ARE TOGETHER.

“Kurt. They may ask you about someone named Tully,” Diane says later, in bed. Doesn’t Kurt already know about Tully? Didn’t they discuss Tully by name two episodes ago? “I need to tell you…” Diane adds. Kurt says no, she doesn’t need to tell him because they’re starting over. Yes, please.

“Epidural. Epidural,” Lucca can’t stop saying. “Those are pretty words.” Her dad corrects her: it’s one word. Heh.

“Are you and mom intentionally not fighting because of me?” Lucca asks, and suddenly I understand a lot more about Lucca’s life. “No, we don’t fight anymore,” her dad responds. “Why’s that?” Lucca asks. Her dad deflects and instead chooses to focus on how Lucca helped Dominic. “That was a bad segue,” Lucca remarks. But she changes the subject, too.

Outside of the room, Francesca and Deirdre are discussing Colin and Lucca’s relationship. “So they’re not getting married?” Deirdre asks. Francesca confirms that they’re not, but “it’s a different time.” “Why is that?” Deirdre asks. Francesca thinks (and I agree) that Deirdre is just looking to fight.

Deirdre is not without her reasons: Francesca immediately asked Deirdre her opinion on Black Panther and sang a Tanzanian song. Francesca remains clueless and asks Deirdre if she’s seen Get Out.

Back at the grand jury, Diane’s asked about her gun. She says she had it melted down after Adrian was shot, and adds that she wanted nothing to do with guns. “I saw what one did to my partner.” (Which partner do you mean, Diane?)

Next question is about representing the DNC, and if Diane argued for the violent overthrow of the government, complete with a recording of 2x07. (No, Maia’s sex tape isn’t mentioned in this episode. Maybe in five seasons.) (While I’m on that note, have I mentioned that I don’t think we need to hear about the tape to hear about Maia’s relationship? I don’t really care if there’s a tape we never hear about again… I’m much more upset that Maia cheated and that was the last thing we got to know about her relationship.)

Liz informs Ruth about the leaked recording. Ruth isn’t surprised. (Ruth is SO good on TGF.) In fact, Ruth was the one who leaked the tape because she’s playing the long-game. She’s basically making an example of Diane in order to show the DNC isn’t biased.

“You fucked her!” Liz accuses. “No, we acted responsibly,” Ruth argues (ummm). “She fucked herself. I’m sorry for your friend, Liz, but I want to win. The Democrats need to stop being such pussies. We have to win.” Ouch.

Colin finally gets to the hospital! Just in time! “Where’s the epidural?” Lucca’s asking. The doctor explains they’ve curbed the effect because it’s time to push. “You motherfucker! You bring the drugs back!” Lucca screams. Hehe. “You cocksucking asshole!” Francesca chimes in. I bet Lucca’s son’s first word is going to be “fuck.” And I don’t think Lucca will mind if it is.

Apparently Lucca’s family is religious, or at least Francesca has reason to believe that.

Oh, yes, they are: Lucca’s mom wants the baby to be baptized and has chosen now to tell Francesca. Colin jumps into action and kicks the parents out.

And Lucca doesn’t seem opposed to the idea of a baptism either, which caught me by surprise (I assumed she was an atheist) but doesn’t really sound too off.

The partners are waiting up to hear if Lucca’s given birth yet. It’s been 14 hours of labor. Why are they waiting for a phone call that might not even come that night? Why would they even expect to be notified the minute the baby was born and not the next day?

Either (a) No one at the firm ever has children so this is a huge event or (b) Lucca’s an extremely important employee. I’m hoping option b is the explanation here.

Marissa and Jay are still working—it’s gotta be midnight by now; maybe the partners are gathered because of Diane’s legal trouble and are also expecting a call from Lucca? Sorry, I am stuck on this. After the way the partners reacted to Lucca’s pregnancy earlier in the season, I would not expect this kind of reaction from them.

Anyway, Marissa and Jay followed the women and found out that Basehart is a good guy (or at least was being a good guy when he helped the pretty young blonde).

The phone rings. Adrian answers. It’s Colin. “Lucca wanted me to call you and tell you that… we have a son.” Congratulations, Lucca!!!! (And Colin lol. I am reading this over and I have realized I congratulated Lucca and not Colin.)

Lucca and Colin’s son, Joseph Quinn-Morello, was born at 1:15 am. Awwwww.

The partners toast to Joseph, and to the future. “May he make a change for a better world,” Diane says. “God knows we need it,” Liz adds. I still don’t buy that this is happening but it’s so sweet I’ll set aside the nitpicking. This scene also contains continuity (I think it’s later that someone comments the champagne is left over from the poorly attended party in 2x04) so yay!

Colin and Lucca discuss how crazy their parents are. “I don’t think I’ll like DC,” Lucca says next. “Give it a year and I bet you will,” Colin says. Lucca doesn’t respond, but she’s not convinced.

The bottle of champagne is gone and Adrian suggests going home. “You know, a year ago… we were looking out at a blacked-out Chicago and I was depressed, and you said to me that the only constant that we have is the law. We’re not a country of men and women; we’re a country of laws. Do you still believe that?” Diane asks. “Yes,” Adrian replies. “That took you a while,” Diane comments. “It’s been a very odd year, Diane,” Adrian says as Liz takes a seat and joins the conversation. (I guess Julius went home to his, er, SIX CHILDREN).

“Yesterday I read that an undocumented pregnant woman was sent back to the country where she was born. There were death threats against her there, and within six months, she was murdered. It was the law to deport her, but, I mean, it wasn’t…” Diane remarks. “Just,” Liz finishes her sentence. “Exactly. What does it matter if we’re a country of laws if the laws aren’t just?” Diane wonders. “What option do we have?” Adrian asks. “Placing justice above the law?” Liz suggests. “Doesn’t justice define the law?” Adrian counters. “Mmmhmm. Conscience does. It has to,” Liz replies. “So then… it’s okay to break the law?” Adrian wonders. Liz and Diane consider this. “If it offends your conscience, yeah,” Liz concludes.

SO MUCH to unpack here. None of these are ideas we haven’t heard before from this show, but they’re coming together in new ways. Diane is well aware that the law is not always just. She’s counted on that to win cases. Wasn’t she always telling Alicia in the early seasons that they follow the law? That their duty is to represent their clients blah blah blah? But she didn’t find it to be a moral offense then—just part of the job. But now Diane questions the structures. I don’t think many of us thought that our systems could fail in the way they’re starting to. And I don’t think many of us were aware of how backwards some of our laws are. Certainly, The Good Wife often hit on that theme (remember how the NSA came to listen to all of Peter Florrick’s calls because Nisa once left a voicemail in tears on the Florrick family’s answering machine?). But there’s a difference between encountering instances of unjust laws and realizing (or coming to feel) that the entire system is unjust. I am not sure if I completely agree with Diane and Liz, but I understand where they’re coming from and why their positions have changed.

(I say changed because I don’t think either Diane or Liz would’ve ever talked like this pre-45. But I do think Liz especially felt this way before. The ends justify the means, and all that.)

(Also, “an odd year” (or “a weird year”) is a line that has been uttered like twenty times on this show. And the idea of ignoring rules that you find unjust is something Alicia LOVED to do, albeit in a different context. I could expand on that comment but then I’d end up writing an essay on Alicia Florrick’s morality, which has nothing to do with the discussion Diane/Liz/Adrian are having and nothing to do with the current political moment.)

One more thing on this scene: I love that Liz is included!!! Liz has worked so well as an addition to this cast.

Diane gets an idea: Lying. She asks Adrian to give Ted Willoughby some scoop at the next committee meeting

NRA lady gets her way (ugh), but Adrian agrees to write the proposal, thinking no one from the committee will actually read it so he can just write his own policies. This seems dangerous, but alright.

Then Adrian slips Mr. Elk the scoop. He knows it’s false, but leaks it anyway to help Diane. I know this is the result of a conversation about ethics and lying, but no one’s lying in court AND this is reminiscent of so many other manipulations on TGW/F that I’m not really sure it feels as monumental as it seems? I’m 99.9% sure Diane’s done stuff like this just to win cases. And if Diane hasn’t, Will definitely did. Isn’t it a very common strategy (on this show) to suggest in court that affairs there’s no evidence of were going on? And didn’t they literally create fake news to sway a jury twice this season? I don’t even have to go back more than a couple of episodes to find an example!  

Lucca’s heading home from the hospital. “So, Colin, huh,” her mom says. “Well that sounds critical,” Lucca replies. “No. He just seems a little more white bread than your usual guys,” her mom observes. Lucca calls him a good guy, and her mom is like, but he wasn’t here when you were in labor. YEAH. TWO WEEKS EARLY. OF ALL THE THINGS TO HOLD AGAINST COLIN WHY THIS ONE?

“I’m going to give you some advice, Lucca. It’s the garage door test. My mom gave it to me, and I’m going to give it to you. Now, if you want to know if a relationship is working, when you drive home from work and you open the garage door, are you happy when you see his car parked there, or are you disappointed?” Deirdre says. “I live in an apartment,” Lucca retorts. “Don’t be contentious. If you see his car parked on the street, are you happy or sad? Do you want to come home and be alone or be with him?” Deirdre continues.

“Mama, I don’t like coming home and seeing anybody there, ever,” Lucca explains. “Well, then there’s your answer,” Deirdre says. “What? That I should be alone for the rest of my life?” Lucca wonders. “No. Wait until you’re happy to see someone’s car,” Deirdre explains. Good advice. And I bet Lucca’s heard it before, because it’s the exact same advice she gives Alicia in the TGW series finale. (I’m not upset that Lucca’s mom is giving her advice she herself has given to others before. I think it makes sense. She had to get that idea from somewhere, and her mom’s probably talked like this many times before, just not directly to Lucca.)

“Are you and dad getting divorced?” Lucca switches the topic. Deirdre’s silence is all the answer she needs. “I love you,” Deirdre says.

On the drive back from the hospital, Lucca looks sad. She’s lost in thought, and she’s realized at once that she’s not with the person she wants to spend her future with and her parents are splitting up.

Colin tells Lucca that Maia and Marissa want to stop by. Lucca smiles at that. And, indeed, there they are, in Maia’s car (just in case it wasn’t clear that they’re the ones happy to come home to!). “I can get rid of them fast,” Colin offers. “No! I want them here,” Lucca decides. “I just realized I want them here,” she says to herself. YES! YES YES YES!

I’m much more invested in Lucca’s friendships than in her romantic relationships. One of the first things we learned about Lucca was that she didn’t have friends, and it means a lot that she’s finally found people who make her happy. Friendships can be fulfilling. Not everyone needs a romantic relationship to be happy, and I love that the show is finally acknowledging this. The idea of a life without a romantic partner that’s still happy and fulfilling isn’t really one Wife ever allowed Alicia to explore for long (if at all), and I’m glad to see that Fight has given its most guarded character the chance to realize there are different paths to happiness. Wife did allow Diane to have a fulfilling life before Kurt came along, but there’s a difference, I feel, between starting off a character in that spot and having a character actively choose friends over a relationship.

(Yes, I’m still bitter that the TGW finale spent so much time having Alicia choose among Peter, Jason, and somehow inexplicably Will when she could’ve chosen herself or her friendship with Lucca. The TGW finale sidelines Lucca when I think it should’ve doubled down on the importance of her friendship with Alicia—which, tbh, I bought a hundred million times more than any of Alicia’s romantic feelings towards Jason.)

Mr. Elk runs the story—we see Diane watching it. Also on the Ted & Friends homepage? “Darkness Before Noon Season Finale Flops.” If I squint, I can read some of the text of the article: “The ??? ??? (highly literal? Liberal??) streaming show found it’s [sic] season finale to be a ratings failure, despite the streaming service not releasing ratings. Inside sources claim the show is on the bubble.” Soooooooo the writers didn’t know if they were getting a season 3, is what I’m getting. Sneaky.

(ALWAYS READ THE TEXT THAT’S ON SCREEN BECAUSE YOU’LL GET SNARK AND ALSO DELICIOUS LINGUISTICS.)

One of the hosts suggests that the president fire Basehart. Diane and Liz smile. Diane moves the flower pot back to the window: “This past month, I’ve been feeling at peace and in control. And I realized that’s not enough. Because people are out to get me. It’s time to fight.”

Soooo the case against Diane is wrapped up if you want it to be and open if you don’t, and there’s a suggested arc for season 3 if you want there to be (a more rebellious Diane). This is classic season-or-series finale writing. If the show stopped here, with Lucca choosing her friends and then Diane declaring “it’s time to fight,” it might not be the best ending but it would feel like an ending. But if the show goes on from here, there are still stories to tell. Between that Darkness Before Noon article and the way the end of this episode feels, I would bet that the Kings didn’t know if the show would be renewed when they wrote this episode.

The closing shot of the season is all of the partners going into a meeting while a computer plays a clip announcing that Kill All Lawyers has given way to Kill All Reporters. Y’all, this is pretty much how they ended BrainDead: suggesting that the main arc was concluded (bugs eating brains of politicians) but there could be more to come (bugs on Wall Street). To end TGF, though, we get an ominous clip of Trump referring to an upcoming “storm.” I don’t know what to say about that, but it’s terrifying!

I’m sure I’ve said this before, but season 2 of TGF feels, at times, more like BrainDead than The Good Wife, and that’s a good thing. I’m eager to rewatch BrainDead. I have a feeling it’ll play differently now than it did in summer 2016.

One final thought: Have you guys heard of something called Trumpy Bear? The other day, I was watching an episode of Younger On Demand, when all of the sudden, what looked like an ad for religious programming came on. “A storm is coming. You cannot defeat the storm. I am the storm. The great American grizzly,” it began. (I think this is a reference to the same quote the TGF finale ended on!) Then confetti poured down the screen. Turns out this wasn’t an ad for a religious show: it was an ad for a stuffed bear with Trump’s hairdo. The bear contains an American flag blanket. The ad shows a bunch of white people cuddling with the bear, taking it golfing, and brushing its hair. I swear to you I did not make this up. You can go on YouTube and find ads for this. It really exists.

But it took me at least fifteen minutes to acknowledge that I hadn’t accidentally taken some of Diane’s psilocybin and hallucinated it. I rewound the program and took a video on my phone. I sent the video or a link to the infomercial (once I found it) to at least ten people. I needed others to tell me this was real because I was staring at the screen in disbelief. When I sent it to some people, I made the TGF reference. To others, I just said, “WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?” and three people (100% of the TGF viewers I sent it to without the upfront joke) replied with their own TGF references.

My point here? The Kings are on to something. This season of TGF captured exactly how it feels to be living through these times.

Also, I still need people to tell me that teddy bear is real. I am SCARRED. 

[seventyfiveapples]

Shaken

CHAPTER 5

Bright / Nick Jakoby x OFC

(Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3; Chapter 4)

Oh hello: it's you, plot and angst. Yes that's right, but there is important background stuff to lay down. I promise there will be sexy times soon. (SO SOON.) So, I was thinking that if Nick was the nation's first orc police officer and it's present day LA, and "races living separately" is a thing, then it might be a pretty Big Deal for an orc and human to date. So that had an affect on some of the conversations in this chapter, and maybe Ward has a little “journey” as he evolves on this topic. Is this too much exposition? Is this too plot heavy? Would it stop me if it was? haha enjoy.

The sun was bright and warm the next day, and Nick took a moment to tilt his head upwards and take a deep breath before climbing the stairs to the station. Was it always this bright? Did the lantana on the sidewalk always smell so sweet? Everything seemed a little... more today. He smiled to himself, thinking about his date with Lucy - their conversation, the way she looked at him... even the end of the date, when their goodbye kiss was so rudely interrupted by the San Andreas fault.

It was a small earthquake: 3.5 or 3.6 tops, but he could tell Lucy was thoroughly freaked out. He realized that she must be relatively new to the area. 

When she gripped him tightly for stability, he thought his heart might pound right out of his chest: Not only did she seem to like his company, she trusted him. She believed he could keep her safe. He wanted to keep earning that trust, to make her feel safe as much as he could. Every now and then he could tell that there was something… some fear at the back of her mind… that kept her always a little on edge.

When she’d asked to come see him at the station today, her whole demeanor had changed. He saw her fear most clearly then.

Oh shit, he thought suddenly, seeing Daryl at his desk across the room. She’s coming to the station today. Nick still hadn't told him that Lucy was human. Maybe it wouldn't be a big deal... Maybe he should tell him just in case.

His partner waved at him from across the room.

“Hey Casanova, how was the big date?”

Nick couldn’t help himself from grinning ear to ear.

“It was… really good! Really REALLY good.” He smiled to himself for a moment and then just shook his head. “She’s incredible… funny, smart, kind, driven... AND,” he concluded, “she picked the smoothie café.”

“Well, aren’t you two just two little orc peas in a pod? You know what, I’m happy for you, Nick.”

“Hey Daryl, can I talk to you about something?”

“Sure thing right after you go turn this paperwork in.”

Daryl handed him a small stack of folders. Nick frowned. Daryl hated to turn in paperwork. The new Captain could chat up a brick wall, and might not even notice. He would take up no less than fifteen minutes of Daryl’s time every time he saw him, regaling him with tales of the glory days of his youth while Daryl tried his best to politely excuse himself. If Daryl Ward could barely get a word in edgewise, Nick didn’t know how anyone else managed.

Luckily for Nick, the captain’s anti-orc bigotry expressed itself in something close to the silent treatment. He barely said two words when he saw Officer Jakoby. For once, Nick didn’t entirely mind being treated differently.

He headed down to drop off the papers.

***

One thing Lucy would never get used to in Southern California was the earthquakes. There was something so unsettling about the ground under her feet moving… what kind of place had she moved to, where she couldn’t trust the ground?

Luckily, yesterday’s was a smaller one. Nick had taken it completely in stride. He hadn’t even flinched when the tremor rolled through - or when she grabbed onto him for dear life. Real smooth, Lucy. There’s that confident image you try to project.

She thought of how he looked at her when she'd held him. She didn’t think he’d minded one bit, actually.

In the police station, she walked straight to Officer Jakoby’s desk. It was empty for the moment.

“Can I help you, ma’am?” Asked a tall, black, human officer from behind her.

“Oh! Thank you, I’m just waiting for Officer Jakoby.”

“He’ll be right back if you want to have a seat. If there’s anything I can help with, he’s my partner.”

“You’re Daryl Ward? It’s nice to meet you! I’m Lucy Harris and-“

“You’re Lucy Harris.” It was more of a statement than a question.

“That’s right, Officer Ward, and I was-“

“Lucy Harris. Teacher, smoothie fan... you’re a human?” He had an odd look on his face as he asked her this question. What was going on here?

Lucy said nothing, watching Daryl as he looked at her with an expression she could not interpret. Finally, she spoke.

“Um, yeah. Last time I checked... Is Nic- Officer Jakoby coming back soon?”

“Yeah, why don’t you just take a seat.” He said, suddenly chilly. Lucy pretended to be fascinated with the contents of her purse while she waited.

After a few minutes, Nick came back. He smiled when he saw Lucy but paused as he approached, seeming to sense something off in the room.

“Hey, Nick. Thanks for meeting with me. Is there somewhere we can go to talk privately? This is kind of... sensitive.”

“Sure. We have a few empty offices down the hall.” He turned to Ward and saw a look that was a mix of... Disappointment? Disgust? Something in between?

“Partner, we can talk in a minute, but right now I could use your help.”

***

The three of them sat in an empty office while Lucy removed three items from the purple canvas tote bag she had brought with her.

“I came home a week ago and my roommate had found this propped against our front door,” she started.

The officers looked closely at the items - torn brown wrapping paper with Lucy’s full name printed in block letter, the framed photo, and the note reading “Found you.”

“Do you have any idea who might have left this?” Asked Ward.

“Absolutely."

***

Two and a half years ago, Lucy Harris didn’t exist.

Jennie Perkins, however, was living a quiet life in Tacoma, Washington. She worked as a teacher at a highly regarded private school and lived with her boyfriend of a year and a half, Dave West.

One day in the early spring, an FBI agent approached her, out of the blue. She told Jennie that her boyfriend was not who he claimed to be, but a murderer and drug dealer involved with organized crime. She brought boxes of photos and documents: not enough for a legal conviction but more than enough to convince Jennie, who was undone by the news. She was shocked and unmoored. Everything she knew about the person she thought she loved had been a lie.

The agent convinced her to hide cameras and listening devices in strategic locations around the house. She advised Jennie to “act normal” until they could build an airtight legal case.

Easier said than done. Overnight she’d gone from a relatively carefree life to being essentially a spy, knowing that her partner was living a double life and trying to make sure he’d be arrested. Acting normally without tipping off a paranoid criminal required tremendous effort.

After a couple of months, something violent happened at their house while Jennie was at work. She never found out what it was. In fact, she never saw the inside of that house again. The takeaways from the incident were 1) that one of the cameras was knocked loose in front of Dave and his “colleagues,” and 2) that Dave probably knew Jennie had hidden it, and was cooperating with the feds.

The agent and Jennie agreed that they would fake Jennie’s death (an elaborately staged car accident) and she would move out of state under an assumed name until the trial was over. The FBI slotted enough resources to help her get set up, and Lucy Harris was “born.”

About a month ago, Lucy received notice that the trial was about to start. The FBI agent had contacted Lucy/Jennie to start making arrangements for her to come and testify.

That phone call was the last time anyone had heard from the agent.

A week later, they found her body in a field by the highway.

Her apartment had been torn up as if someone was looking for something… Lucy had a pretty good idea of what. Not quite three weeks after that when the package had shown up on Lucy’s door.

“So," Lucy concluded. "Billie and I moved into a new place. Luckily, her brothers had an empty rent house right next door. I was just starting to feel okay again, but the afternoon someone slashed two of my tires. They left this.” She reached into her bag to pull out the knife and note. She couldn’t look Nick in the eye when he picked up the note full of slurs and read it.

“Apparently, he's close by, and he knows where I am. And I don’t know what to do. So I wanted to just report this, just in case there's some way to find him or stop him.”

There was a moment’s pause, as the officers digested what she had told them. Daryl spoke first.

"Damn," he said. “That's... a lot. Look I know this is a long shot, but I don't suppose you have any evidence about this? Before we commit to any security detail, we'll need some hard proof.

Lucy looked up, surprised. She let out a sudden sharp laugh.

“Oh no, I have tons of evidence! Boxes and boxes. I made copies of everything I gave to the agent. It’s all in a safety deposit box. I’m pretty sure that’s the only reason I’m still alive. I haven’t visited it in months, but it’s all there.”

“We’ll need to see it.”

“Well then you’ll need to figure out how to get me there unrecognized, because I am pretty sure he’s following me.”

Nick swallowed hard. Had he followed them on their date? Lucy looked at him, a guilty expression washing over her face.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Nick. I should have. I just… it seems like I keep putting more and more people at risk. I had a great time with you, but I don’t blame you if…” she shook her head. She didn’t have to say it. She knew he’d want to call it off. Hot tears sprang to her eyes, as the reality of the whole situation settled on her. It was the first time she’d talked about this in two years to anyone except Billie.

“Lucy, you haven’t done anything wrong. Daryl, could you give us a minute?” After his partner left, Nick moved close enough to lay a strong hand on her forearm and look straight in her eyes. “Lucy, I really like you. I’m not going anywhere. It’s going to take more than that to get rid of me.”

“More than a murdering psychopath?” she said with a skeptical laugh.

He raised his eyebrows. “Murdering psychopaths? I eat those for breakfast. They go great with that kale smoothie.” He didn’t often make jokes, but when he did, they seemed to have been borrowed from cop movies. Lucy broke into a loud laugh, part nerves and part surprise, and hugged him. 

“Now, tell us everything that might help us track down this asshole.”

***

Later, on patrol, Nick broke several minutes of silence with a pointed question. “Something on your mind, partner?”

“I guess not.”

“You ‘guess’ not? The fuck does that mean?”

“If you don’t want to tell me about your business, then I guess it’s not my place to say shit about shit.”

“Meaning?” Nick asked gruffly.

“Why didn’t you mention she was human?”

“Does it matter?”

“You know what all those assholes at the station are gonna-“

“Does it matter to YOU, Daryl?”

Daryl looked out of the window, not answering. After a few seconds, he spoke.

“You should have told me.”

“Ward,” Jakoby started, keeping as even a tone as he could, “are you upset because I didn’t tell you, or are you upset because you don’t think orcs and humans should date?”

Ward paused again, and tried to choose his words carefully. “Each of the nine races stay separate, you know that. That’s why there’s peace.”

Nick snorted, a humorless laugh. It was two steps forward, two steps back with his partner.

“Peace?! Is that what you see out here?” Driving through an Orcish district, they saw gang-tagged graffiti on every wall, smashed windows covered with plywood boards, crime scene tape around one corner, and a group of teen orcs glaring at them. In the distance they could see a billboard advertising jewelry. It read: “exclusively available in the Elf District.”

“I’ll tell you what I see,” Nick concluded, “a powder keg. I don’t think keeping people separate is really helping anything.”

He continued: “Look, Lucy and I didn’t plan this, and we’ve only had one date, but I really like her. How the fuck does that hurt anyone?”

After another pause, Ward finally spoke. “What about her? I mean, you’re used to all the bullshit people say. Do you really want to put her through that?”

Daryl had struck a chord. Nick hated to think of Lucy - of anyone - being insulted or attacked because of him.

“She’s not naive, Ward,” Nick responded in a softer tone. “It’s her choice to make, and mine. No one else’s.”

“I just… it’s not going to be easy for you.”

“Maybe not. Since when do I take the easy road?” Nick asked, smiling a little. “I’m used to people - humans, orcs, whoever - saying shit to me. They’re going to do that anyway.” He stopped for a minute. “I know they say shit about me to you, too.”

It wasn’t an accusation, but Daryl felt a pang of guilt. Had he heard what the other officers said about him on a daily basis in the locker room? Had Daryl even spoken up? He couldn’t remember.

“I’m not asking you to confront them, or fight my battles. I’m just asking - in this situation, with Lucy - if people get ugly, it would mean a lot to me to know I had your support… if I do have it.”

Nick looked at him with questioning eyes and Daryl sighed. He’d never known any orc-human couples and it just seemed odd to him, but Nick had a point: who did it hurt? Nick’s request was so sincere it cut through anything Daryl might have said in protest.

Besides that, Daryl thought of Lucy's story. How were they ever going to find this guy? A little orc/human racial tension might be the least of their worries.

More than anything he kept thinking, what if the tables were reversed? What would Nick say if Daryl asked for his support, for anything?

He would offer it without hesitation, of course.

“Yeah,” Daryl replied at last. “You got it, Nick.”

***

Across town, Dave West paced in his makeshift room: an abandoned shipping container at the very far end of the docks. At his feet lay a spectrum of weapons, but he would have to add to these: most of them wouldn’t do too much on the orcs that were protecting Jennie now. He logged onto his computer to keep tabs on her through the GPS tracker he’d placed on her car.

The police station, huh? He wondered if it was business or pleasure. He flipped through the photos he’d taken of Jennie and the orc police officer on their date. He’d probably have to move a little more quickly than he wanted to.

There was still no sign of her visiting any storage units or banks with safety deposit boxes. He had to wait, for now, damn it. As long as that evidence was out there, he was in danger of not only criminal conviction, but he was in danger from all of the other people who were mentioned or implicated in whatever she had gathered.

He’d be better off in prison than out and “free” with them as his enemies.

No, for now, he just had to wait for her to slip up. Once he destroyed the evidence, he could kill her and everyone who tried to help her, and get back to San Francisco.

Or, he thought, flipping through the photos again, he could help things along and get... creative.

@beastlybfs @bonnietakesnosh-t @fantasticauthorofzonk

[peterandviola]

The end is nothing; the road is all.   Willa Cather

Throughout my medical ordeal, I have said over and over that I am not afraid. Sometimes, I say it for the benefit of my family, especially my youngest grands and the great grand. Sometimes I say it to fortify my husband, Peter, who is such a strong person, one might think he needs no such thing. Really, I also think I say it for myself.

From the beginning, a time I can’t quite remember, I’ve tried to be calm about calamitous and horrifying predictions, developments that could scare the pants off most anyone. “I am not afraid,” seems to bolster strength and reassure a lot of people. But, as outside events, public violence, personal setbacks and outrageous news of all sorts have happened, I find myself withering and withdrawing, overly sensitive.

The events of this week in Las Vegas have shaken me. I hear echoes of it in most everyone’s voice. “Who? What? Why?” resound as loud as the fake news and nasty bots that have pretty much ruined the joys of social media for me. There is no apparent answer to these questions and certainly no solution while we as a people remain hideously divided.

Coming out of my self-imposed cocoon long enough to test the winds of reality hasn’t been easy for me. Our time in England and Scotland was wonderful. I felt myself again, felt that happy, hardy woman deep inside who I’ve always been. It made it easy to defy dire words and hateful news. I felt my spirit bound between experiences, new and old. I marveled at how things can be so new in such an old land. Maybe it was just the realization that these new feelings have always been with me, but somewhat buried from necessity. I enjoyed everyone I visited and strangers I met that are no longer strangers. What an incredible luxury.

This morning, I feel the gut grabbing sense of the chaos everyone seems to be feeling. And there’s something else. I’ve lost my NED status (no evidence of disease.) Last week, I met a new doctor, who I thought was consulting with me over a broken vertebra at T7, along the bra line. I’ve known about the break for a long while, almost a year. My doctors called it to my attention some time ago, and it was considered by them all. One barely saw it on an MRI. I didn’t think it would be too serious, especially because one doctor thought it might just be a stress fracture that could grow back together.

The new doctor consulted with me all right. I must admit, it was the first time fear blossomed in the way I see it in others. Before I agreed to a consult, I discussed it with my beloved oncologist, Ian Anderson and the ossi-unification oncologist/surgeon, Rosie Wustrack. I was assured that it was a good idea. Probably, it should be fixed after all this time. One strong contender for repair was the cementing of the fracture, a procedure that would probably keep me in the hospital a maximum of overnight—and would not require a general anesthetic.

And so I headed off for our great adventure, giddy and happy with possibility. Before I left, I had an MRI and made the requisite appointments. I never really gave it much thought, although I had days that were painful. I chalked it off to all the activity of the trip. As I drew closer to my crazy goal of triumph over Arthur’s Seat via all-terrain walker, I felt the pain changing in me. These difficulties were mitigated by my rediscovered abilities to climb stairs, sit on low toilets and get out in snappy winds to touch ancient stones and see antiquity in Neolithic evidence of life on earth.

As you all may know, I did it!

I climbed Arthur’s Seat with good friends I am so blessed to have in Scotland. 

Peter was my full partner in everything, no matter how nutty it seemed. We did things he longed to do, too. It made me realize that, after 25 years of being close, a quiet kind of love has developed between us. I understood that, yes, it was evidence of enduring belief. Happiness, even. Many nights, I would turn to him and listen to him breathe, sonata-like and reassuring. I found my warm spot from the most ordinary of things. “Thank you, thank you,” I would whisper, sometimes waking him up for the pure joy of seeing his eyes open and crinkle with his smile.

Cut to Friday’s appointment at UCSF. The doctor was an hour and forty-five minutes late, cutting into the lunch hour, while we heard a robust rendition of Happy Birthday belted out by the staff from another room. Deep breathing didn’t seem to help as I began to worry.

Finally, I was ushered in by a Physician’s Assistant, who assured me the doctor was considered a very good and easy-to-like healer.

When he made his appearance 30 minutes later, I wondered why I felt the hair on my neck fly up. He was practiced in civil patter and seemed very knowledgeable about spinal matters; it is his specialty. Soon out of the gate, he began to talk about a tumor no one had mentioned to me. According to him, it had grown big enough to crack the T7 vertebra. Two little “worry spots” on my right lung were soon referred to as “potential tumor building activity.”

He suggested two likely routes of treatment. One was the cement procedure, a sort of in-and-out thing. Except he said he would probably do that if palliative care was all I was after. The other is a complex operation, basically replacing the vertebra with something called a “cage”—which he said would be more painful and longer to rehab than my leg. At this point, I called in Peter. The doctor said he knew I had grown more anxious as he rattled on, and why was that?

I wanted to say, What the Hell? You are talking about cancer here, with a survivor, someone who has thrived beyond simple rehabilitation. Instead, I said, “I’ve endured six major surgeries and learned to walk four times in four years.” He shook his head like a friendly big dog. “I know, but maybe we can cure you with the big operation.” No one has promised to cure me before. We asked lots more questions, including why he was so interested in my case. “I think it would be very interesting to see a surgical cure for a woman of 70 with Kidney Cell Cancer like yours.” I told him I would get back to him after October 10 when all my scans were in and read, but needed to talk to my oncologist first, to which he raised his eyebrows in surprise.

We left then, and managed to make it to the car before we started crying. And yes, I finally I felt it—full- on fear. Not for myself, but for my gentle, intelligent husband, for my family, for the friends, even my sweet little dog Puccini, all of whom saved me from the jaws of death and the cold claw of depression much earlier in this tale.Our weekend was spent going in circles about treatment and the absolutely sickening feeling I couldn’t  seem to shake. I am sicker than I thought.

But then, Sunday morning, I woke up with hard-to-believe joy in my heart. I heard the even breathing of my beloved and our little Puccini. It felt warm in the house. I realized we had slept in slightly. For reasons unknown to me, I raised my eyes and gave a little prayer of thanks. For the love that surrounds me. For another day ahead. For this and so much else. I suddenly felt lucky. And grateful for everything that surrounds me, despite the complex web of uncertainty. I am alive, and that is all, my dears.

Thank you again for your unflagging support and understanding. The future? It’s ahead, and that’s all I know. More details will follow after the 10th.

[escailyyy]

Exasperating also starts with E

(Note: this is an Au where Eurus never killed VT and grew up as normal in the Holmes household as the baby of the family, she’s still a sociopath, so this happened…)

"Are you ever going to tell Molly Hooper that you love her?” Was the first thing Sherlock heard upon entering Baker Street after a long case, admittedly he should be used to his little sister showing up at his flat for no reason other than to annoy him, but honestly he thought it was Mycroft’s turn this month .

“And good evening to you too Eurus” Sherlock sighed turning around to find her sitting in his chair casually eating from a tub of (obviously expensive, imported specifically for high priority clients, delivered just two hours ago by a messenger with sweaty hands) Marchetti Gelato, she was wearing the Pajamas Mycroft had give her last Christmas and apparently seemed to have the ludicrous idea that he was back to his eight year old self who’d indulged her in as many pretend tea parties as she wished “I thought you said sleepovers were for goldfishes and amoeba brained females not worth associating with”

(Adult Eurus had never graduated from her ‘force my brothers to play tea party with me’ phase. And unlike Mycroft, who’d easily used his seniority to escape their little sister’s manipulative feminine machinations as soon as humanly possible, Sherlock never really had it in him to push her away)

“And he avoids my question, big surprise there, do have some Gelato, I even had this Ginger Nut flavor comissioned just for you” Eurus smiled extending the tub in his direction “you know that you are my favorite brother don’t you?”

“Yes I am aware, considering that the other option is Mycroft and I always win by default, although I apreciate the effort to sweeten what will undoubtedly be a conversation fraught with manipulation tactics and no I do not love Molly Hooper” Sherlock replied, putting away his bellstaff loosening his scarf and accepting the gelato “speaking of which how is your dear James?”

“Still hiding behind his lawyer in an effort to avoid me” Eurus sighed dramatically with a wave of her hand

“Well to be fair Moriarty isn’t an idiot, I think most men would prefer his high security prison in the middle east over facing your wrath after his failure to remember your aniversary” Sherlock didn’t have to make his disapproval of his sister’s choice of boyfriend known, after all it was the frequent topic of discussion among family dinners and the only subject Mycroft and he agreed on lately, but when it came to life sentences the Holmes brothers didn’t think that there was anything worse than being subjected to Eurus and the mercurial moods she hid under her sociopathic personality, so they both refrained from outright trying to get themselves rid of him.

“As James should” Eurus huffed “but he won’t be able to plead guilty forever if I make sure evidence of the contrary begins to accumulate around him” And considering the latest petty crime Moriarty had pleaded guilty for involved the assassination of a well known Middle East religious leader, Sherlock didn’t doubt his sister’s threat “are we done with your deflections Sherlock?, answer me already, when is that love confession taking place?”

“Very well Eurus, I’ll humor you” the 'else you’ll never let the subject drop’ was implied but thankfully not voiced, if one thing was true among the Holmes family was that Sherlock loved his like minded sister and rarely left an opportunity to talk to her go to waste “why do you think that I am as you so eloquently put it 'in love’ with Molly Hooper when you know I firmly believe that sentiment is a waste of time”

“Because you are, do you need me to make a PowerPoint presentation to illustrate it?” Eurus snorted, reminding Sherlock of their teenage years and her old perchance for whining about always being right “Anyone with high IQ can see it”

“So Papa has finally given you the grandchildren ultimatum huh?”

“No more than he gave it to Mycroft but that’s not the point”

“Youre his only daughter of course its the point, Papa wants grandbabies to spoil and you as the daddy’s girl that you are, do not want to dissapoint him, you wouldn’t be here trying to matchmake me otherwise” Sherlock shot back smugly “stop saying I’m in love with Molly”

“may I remind you that of all the people in this sentiment riddled universe Molly Hooper is the only one you’ve voluntarily apologized to?”

“It doesn’t prove anything” Sherlock dodged sitting in his armchair “I respect Molly, she’s my friend”

“You analyze her life choices and clothing preferences more than you do any other female in your acquaintance and that includes mummy, Mrs Hudson, Mary Watson and Me” Eurus listed off ticking her fingers “I don’t have much experience with actual friends but as the social manipulation expert in this family I can tell you that friends do not do that”

“I do NOT analyze Molly’s life choices, I deduce them and offer helpful advice, which according to John IS what friends do”

“Then why do you always hold your deductions whenever the topic of sex comes up around her?” Eurus challenged him with a smug smile as if to say 'go ahead, try to deduce yourself out of that question’ “it wouldn’t happen to be because your mind palace automatically supplies complimentary material would it? You used to say that intercourse was part of human nature”

Sherlock internally blanched, his sister really knew too much “because it has come to my attention that talking about someone else’s sexual habits and preferences in a social setting is potentially embarrassing for them”

“I see I’ll have to help you along, honestly your level of denial is quite impressive” If Eurus had been a little younger she’d have reached for fake glasses and written Sherlock’s name on a clipboard like she used to do when she’d mockingly declared she wanted to be a psychologist after her tenure in Sherrinford “why if its potentially embarrassing do you still do it to virtually anyone…exept Molly?”

“Because Molly is different, she’s not an idiot, she’s useful to me and good at her job”

“So you get no satisfaction out of making her feel like an idiot I understand, yet one could argue that Mycroft and I arent idiots either and you infer about our sexual lives often enough” Eurus pointed out taking a spoonful of gelato “why is molly different?”

“Because she is!” Sherlock grunted instantly regretting it by the knowing look his younger sister was giving him “what I mean to say is that, talking to her about the subject never feels correct to me, Molly isn’t …”

“Able to talk about sex like a normal adult? Why Sherlock she’s a healthy woman in her thirties who disects naked human bodies for a living, I would think she’s probably very open about it” Eurus ventured innocently “her past boyfriends seem like they were enjoying themselves at the very least”

“Would you please stop taking about Molly Hooper and sexual expertise in the same sentence!” The consulting detective finally snapped

“You ruin all her relationships”

“Its not my fault that she seems to attract men with criminal tendencies”

“Oh please, you announce to any who can hear the most inconsequential things, who cares if the paralegal with the bleach teeth was evading his taxes? His only crime was talking to your precious pathologist during her lunch break” why was it that Eurus always managed to sound fifteen whenever she tried to meddle in his life?, she was a genius in all parts of her life, but as a sister Eurus Holmes could really be a pain in Sherlock’s ass when she wanted to be"If you haven’t deduced it, I’ll have you know even James could tell that her relationships are your blind spot"

“Please don’t remind me about the famous 'Jim from IT’ considering that masquerading as Molly’s date isnt an ideal way of meeting my younger sister’s psychopath boyfriend ”

“ Life partner” Eurus corrected without missing a beat “James and I don’t use amaeba terms to classify our conection” then remembering something funny she added with a chuckle “The 'Molly factor’ blindsided your deductions so badly you even thought James was gay, as if someone like him would limit himself by the sexuality and gender of his partners”

“Nowdays I even doubt that he’s limited by their consent, species or lack of pulse” Sherlock rolled his eyes, glaring at his sister “But then again he’s saddled with you, so what should I expect? After all I’ve seen his bruises and heard the tortured screams”

“What can I say I like things rough and James is the only man I know who gives as good as he gets” Eurus shrugged and Sherlock had to remind himself that she wasn’t the type to worry about the gender, sexual orientation, lack of consent or inmorality of her sexual acts either “he has a certain je nes se quais that fits me so well”

“Spare me the details Eurus, there’s a reason I never frequent your Knightsbridge flat”

“Me thinks the gentleman doth protest too much, your Molly hasn’t been raised under a rock you know, why, if my airlines didn’t keep me so busy I’d think I might even grow to like her, I would wager my escapes with James wouldn’t shock her”

“Keep your evil machinations away from Molly Hooper sister mine” Sherlock warned narrowing his eyes “You already played you games with John and it almost cost him his marriage, if you so much as try the same on Molly so help me science I will make you regret it”

“Why would I want to make my future sister in law despise me?” Eurus laughed letting Sherlock see in her eyes a glint of the madness she kept firmly under lock and key in the confines of her own mind palace “you should really hasten that love confession Sherlock, you won’t be virile forever you know, after all we don’t know if all those drugs you’ve taken in the past have affected your fertility” she taunted in a sing song voice

“I’m perfectly fertile and perfectly virile! Molly would have nothing to complain about in that aspect” Sherlock exclaimed outraged realizing belatedly thst he’d falken for Eurus’ bait “I meant it in a purely hypothetical situation”

“ARGH I blame Mycroft for this! If he hadn’t put the 'emotions are evil’ mantra in your head you wouldn’t be acting like a preschooler pulling the pigtails of the girl he fancies” Eurus groaned putting her head in her hands “what have I done to deserve this?” The answer : probably a lot

“Funny, Mycroft blames you for crippling Victor’s legs in that blasted well and coloring my perception of human relationships with trauma”

“He locked me in SHERRINFORD for three years because of it, excuse me if I disregard his opinion on the state of your psyche”

Sherlock sighed, he supposed they all were self fulfilling prophecies, being the middle child in a family of geniuses had never been easy, specially because their whole sibling dynamic hinged on Sherlock’s hability to stay neutral in the feud between Eurus and Mycroft, who by all means hated each other during a good day

But Eurus liked Sherlock and Mycroft liked Sherlock so they made an effort to not attempt mutual murder if it kept them in their middle brother’s good graces.

“Sherlock you leave me no choice! If you don’t get your head out of your rectal cavity where Molly Hooper is concerned and tell her that you love her I’ll have to force the issue with Mycroft” Eurus outlined in no uncertain terms, eyes flashing the way they only did when she played violin “and believe me I won’t be as nice to him as I’m to you”

“It would take a battering ram to knock down Mycroft long enough to give papa grandchildren and we both know it” Sherlock exclaimed, then narrowing his eyes the posibility that Eurus was in fact unhinged enough to put her brain to the task of breaking Mycroft “you wouldn’t, even YOU have to draw a line somewhere”

“Andrea has been working with him for how long? Since high school if I’m not mistaken, I happen to know a philanthropic a armament mogul that is looking for a public relations manager and well…How bored must Andrea be in that silly little desk, chained to our brother, doing paperwork all day, a woman of her capabilities deserves more and Mycroft doesnt let her do an ounce of fieldwork, if I happened to offer the position to her, adding the fact that our mogul has the highest number of assassination attempts in any bounty hunter’s book, she’d accept right away, if only to get to use her fancy guns” Eurus began innocently as tough outlining her lunch break plans

Deducing exactly who she was referring to Sherlock groaned “Nikolai Udinov? You would send Andrea to manage the life of that reprobate? Mycroft would never allow it”

“Well what do you expect? If Andrea leaves her job and him for good I calculate that it will take Mycroft less than two months to crack, she does his laundry, paperwork, calls, orders him his cakes, decorates his bunkers, manages his agents with an iron fist, Andrea practically breathes for him and Mycroft needs the wake up call” Eurus smiled with a hint of malice “so many agents have fallen in Udinov’s maze of secrets…It would be a pity if Mycroft’s greek flower was next”

“That’s because Nikolai Udinov is the type of assignment that goverment agents train for years to take on, the bullseye in his back is larger than Mycroft’s ego ” Sherlock snapped wondering again why he hadnt trottled his sister yet “you’d be manipulating Andrea into strong arming Godfather Death”

“Correction Mycroft will THINK she’s taking on Godfather Death” Eurus snapped rolling her eyes “She’ll be fine, I wasn’t lying when I said Agent Anthea is quite competent and she’s been wanting to do fieldwork since her thirtieth birthday, my people will make sure she doesn’t get killed”

Sherlock didn’t even want to ask about who 'her people’ were, like he did with Mycroft and they did with him, the less the Holmes siblings knew about eachother’s ocassional dabblings in the wrong side of the law the better “You’ll just have Mycroft believe she is, but why?”

Eurus huffed tempted to just repeat Sherlock’s famous 'you see but you don’t observe’ dribble that he always spewed to John Watson “Because it will kill Mycroft to lose Andrea and I’ll enjoy seeing him suffer” Eurus shrugged “think about it Sherlock, Andrea has been a fixture in Mycroft’s life since your uni days, the only time you and I see him without her is on social situations and even then she’s always one text away from him, he trusts her with all of his sensitive information”

“You assume that he cares about her” Sherlock snorted mystified “Mycroft doesnt do sentiment Eurus, not even for Andrea”

“Oh how blind my brothers can be when they wish to” Eurus laughed taking out a bag of chips from her purse and biting a couple “I don’t assume, I KNOW, just as I know that you love Molly, the difference is that Andrea is more likely to wait to have children, but as I said I’ll force the issue if I have to”

“If Agent Anthea dies because you wanted to get out of giving our parents grandchildren then forget about Sherrinford, he’ll hire a submarine and drop you in the Atlantic with a crew of deaf personell”

“You could also tell your morgue mouse that you love her, then I wont have to threaten Mycroft’s potted plant”

Eurus like always, had a better grasp of the ins and outs of sentiment than her two elder brothers, a fact both Sherlock and Mycroft often resented, because while Sherlock fought his battles with logic and Mycroft with dry politics, Eurus manipulated people using their emotions against them. She’d rarely used her 'gift’ on Sherlock preferring to keep herself occupied with her chain of airlines and her side work as a data analyst (when she wasn’t dabbling in her illegal hobbies) apparently tough she was doing it now.

Sherlock didn’t find it amusing.

“I suppose I should be grateful that you have not threatened to kill Molly yet and instead chose to talk to me about it in a rational way, isn’t that what your point is?”

“Yes! And I feel deeply offended that you don’t appreciate the gesture, I could have bulldozed trough your childhood traumas just to make you see sense” Eurus huffed clearly not happy by Sherlock’s lack of gratitude “I don’t see why you wont just admit the truth”

“You’re seeing things where they don’t exist, don’t you think that if zi loved Molly I would know?”

“NO! BECAUSE YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND SENTIMENT” she shot back with an angry glare, then Eurus sighed and did the one thing that always brought Sherlock to his knees, she opened her big dark eyes and gave him a very sincere part of her vulnerability “Sherlock” she began, her tone belying how much she wasn’t trying to manipulate him this time “you’ve been there for me trought all the hard things in my life, you who have supported me even in things we both know you knew better than to support…Is it really such a surprise to know that I want to see you happy?”

“as my little sister, wanting to see me happy comes with the territory” Sherlock replied putting the desert down and returning her sincerety “the truth is that I don’t see a future where I can keep Molly safe, I have too many enemies…she deserves better than me, she always has”

“And yet she loves you, all of you, far strongly than you deserve”

“Foolish woman that she is” Sherlock chuckled “I can’t love her Eurus, I’d be placing a red mark in her forehead if I did”

“Sherlock, there’s always going to be Blackwoods, Magnussens and Black Lotus organisations in this world, in fact there’s drunk drivers and bad weather and unhealthy eating habits all who cause death on daily basis, but for you there’s only one Molly” Eurus tried reasoning softly “ its hard enough for people like us to form lasting human connections, I’ve come to learn it takes years of persistence to completely bond with someone else and the fact that you are capable of it is something I’ve always admired far beyond Mycroft’s Iceman facade”

“Speaking from experience?” He raised an eyebrow taking care not to break the fragile bubble of vulnerability they’d reached

“Its always nice to know that there’s always someone out there who will care about you beyond the trappings of your psyche” Eurus agreed cryptically, giving Sherlock a tiny insight into the twisted reason why his sister hadn’t allowed Moriarty to blow his brains off after Sherlock’s fall “isn’t that how Molly makes you feel? I admit she’s no Nocturne like Irene Adler in looks or sexual appeal but I don’t believe I could be wrong in what I see when you look at her while her back is turned”

“Don’t put Molly in the same category as the woman…Irene is a capriccio, an Intermezzo with too many Staccato harmonies and not enough tenerezza, more Opera than Nocturne she’s filled with high octaves and acciaccaturas, Molly is her own sonata”

“Now that is quite surprising” It had never occurred to Eurus that Sherlock might have a melody for Molly, mainly because if he did he’d want Eurus to hear it at least once, given her brother and her shared a love for violin that often lent itself to describing people in musical terms according to how they saw the world but honestly Eurus expected Sherlock to classify Molly as a chloral “how does Molly sound?”

“Molly is shades of Adagios, Dolce notes and intermitent Allegros, that rise and fall without damaging the integrity of the composition, any more notes and she could have been a ballet or a solft waltz” Sherlock sounded so sure, humming a few bars to let her understand the gist of his thoughts, always far more comfortable expressing sentiment trough music than in words

“I wonder why you have never played her for an audience” Eurus genius that she was didn’t need to see him play to hear the notes in her head, the soft tone of the violin and the spikes of the Sonata’s hidden edges “she sounds like comming home” was all Eurus could say after the song finished playing in her mental fortress “your very own masterpiece”

“Her melody isn’t for public to hear” Sherlock replied ruminanting in his sister’s words, because she had put into words the elusive title that he’d never given to the Sonata that belonged to Molly Hooper 'comming home’ was an apt name for the piece and if he was honest with himself he had to admit it had been that way for a long time, Molly herself was the kind of person who’s existence validated the part of Sherlock who needed a place to run to when things got difficult “she makes me feel accepted, when it comes to Molly I always know that whatever I do, or wherever I go, I will always have a place to call home in her life, the Sonata always changes in degrees of subtleties” hadn’t that been the reason he’d felt so hurt by her (failed) engagement to Meat dagger? Because he’d assumed she would always be there… and on the heels of that thought the realization struck “Because I love her”

Eurus could have clapped her hands in joy at the breaktrough of her brother, and to think it hadn’t taken any death threats, really Sherlock was so much better to reason with than Mycroft “then why do you keep wasting so much time?” She asked still trying to be understanding

“You don’t understand Eurus, I LOVE HER” Sherlock exclaimed in shock and Eurus could see the beginning of what looked like a very Holmes panic attack “And I’ve hurt her in the past so badly…and you KNEW” he was referring of course to the fact that Eurus hadn’t told him what she suspected since day one

“In all honesty I thought that you would have noticed your attraction to your pathologist since the moment you began your game of 'flirting for organs’ I didn’t expect the situation to last this long” Eurus admitted sheepishly reminding Sherlock of the way she used to intentionally assume that he’d clean his bedroom when he had a nasty experiment rotting in his desk, conveniently not reminding him to throw it away “its not my fault, its yours” So maybe his mind palace was undergoing a major rearrangement, Eurus could work with that..hopefully

“What do I do now?” Sherlock groaned putting his head in his hands “I love her”

“You do whatever mummy would do I suppose, she’s the one who is good at handling non-sociopaths” Eurus tried to help along “maybe you should confer with Dr Watson, I fear my continued advice in that subject would nderimental to your latest breaktrough” Aka: Eurus would not give Sherlock romantic life hacks, she simply wasn’t willing to.

“Mummy…would make lunch, maybe a pot of her favourite tea” Sherlock agreed pensively “and ease Molly slowly into the situation”

“Not too slowly, I want my first nephew to be born preferably within the next year or so” Eurus asserted as tough she were giving Sherlock her takeaway order “you will make mostly male children given both of your genetic profiles but I’d still like at least one of them to be named after me if possible”

“Have you ever thought that Molly might not want children? If anything she hasn’t agreed to even date me yet, let alone get engaged or conceive with me…”

“Tiny crime solving pathologists?” Eurus supplied when he couldn’t bring himself to say the word children “Sherlock a basic deduction of Molly’s life would point towards a desire for a nuclear family, more to the point she’d want it and she’d want it with you, the only sibling in our circle liable to be successful in raising another generation of Holmes geniuses” considering Mycroft and Eurus would most likely cause their offspring some degree of psychological issues with their parenting techniques, it didn’t sound so much like a compliment

Aaaand there went their bonding moment, Eurus was back to her manipulative self “Maybe you should leave” Sherlock muttered comming in and out of buffering mode “as much as I enjoy our interludes, I don’t think I’m fit for company or will be for the next few hours”

“Maybe I should, my work here is done” Eurus agreed rising from her seat and dusting her Pajamas “I expect that a sleepover wouldn’t be any fun anyway, not with the way your thoughts are shouting”

Noticing the changes in the tone of her voice Sherlock briefly paused his panic attack to regard his sister with a suspicious stare “Stay away from my pathologist Eurus, I mean it”

“I will, but be a smart boy and keep an eye on her, I heard your old friend Victor is back in town” Eurus attempted to joke “Maybe you should move her here for a few days, you know, for security reasons” And with that parting shot his sister breezed out of Baker Street leaving a very stressed Sherlock no choice but to phone Molly

“Gasp and Bloody Works what can I do for you?” Molly’s cheerful voice answered her mobile, Sherlock could hear the sound of a bone saw in the distance and deduced he’d caught her in the middle of an autopsy

A million thoughts raced trough his head but he settled for a mundane response, no need to alarm her “Bad time for a call?”

“Oh it’s you Sherlock, sorry I didn’t see the caller ID, funny you should phone I just got the most interesting body with a unidentified brain aneurysm, I thought you might find it interesting so no its not a bad time at all” she always sounded in good mood whenever he called, give or take a few exemptions, Molly always tried her best to be positive about everything including his cases.

“Really? A brain you say” Sherlock perked up before remembering the subject at hand “actually I was calling to ask for a favor, but the brain aneurysm sounds quaint, please save it for future study”

'smooth Sherlock real smooth’ mind palace john muttered

'Not now Watson’

Molly who knew him well enough to know that if he wanted to ask for something big he’d do it in person and not by phone had no qualms in replying “what kind of favor? Sherlock is this for a case?, you know that as long as its within my power I will help you”

“No its not for a case, this is more of a personal favor, I need to stay in your flat for an undefined amount of time” there he said it now all he had to do was get Molly to agree, because while this wasn’t the first time he’d used her place as a bolthole it was the one time he’d do it for sentiment’s sake and consent was important.

“Wait, why? Are you okay” the bone saw was turned off and Sherlock could hear the unecessary concern in the voice of the woman he’d just realised he loved.

“yes I’m fine, but I have reasons to believe that my privacy in Baker Street has been compromised” and he needed to make sure Molly’s hadn’t been. Lest Eurus perchance for giving people a push in the right direction landed Molly in the bottom of a well.

“By who?”

Sherlock gave a long suffering sigh and answered “by my sister”

An: I’ve thought up Eurus as a dark version of Georgiana to Sherlock’s Mr Darcy hope she wasn’t to occ, this fic is for all my Sherllolian folks on tumblr, who are just awesome