#hi welcome to my LONG ted talk. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

casurlaub · 6 months ago

Text

Why Wolfstar makes sense canonically

Call me delusional but welcome to my TED talk

Most of this has been said repeatedly by others over the years. I don't mean to steal anybody's credit, so if you feel like I have, please reach out.

This is me 'defending' Wolfstar, I'm not hating on another ship here and I won't engage in a discussion about which ship makes more sense. I'm just trying to elaborate why I can 'see' Wolfstar - even from a canon perspective.

I'm trying (and hoping to succeed) to be respectful and I'm not attacking a specific person here. This is just a general post with all my thoughts on the matter and all the arguments I've heard against it.

Brace yourself because this is going to get really really long, and there'll be a lot of quotes from the original source material.

The original source material

I feel that many people who claim the ship doesn't make sense fail to see that we're in this fandom because it did make sense to us after reading the books. The fandom exists, because many people saw it. Because it's possible to see it. It's not the other way around.

The thing with Wolfstar is, that it's all in the 'show not tell' which I suppose makes it 'easy' to overlook. Obviously it is, with the author not intending the ship - I'm not saying wolfstar is canon, but it makes a lot of sense with what we have in canon.

Their nonverbal communication

They have a lot of nonverbal communication going on, which shows a great level of understanding for one another. But they're not only able to read one another, they're actively (and both of them) communicating via eye contact - a lot. They're searching for the other person's eyes and are passing along 'thoughts', are reaching silent understandings just like that. That hints at a great emotional connection.

Let's do that 'chronologically':

It doesn't take more than a single look from Sirius to convince Remus that he is innocent. At this point Remus doesn't know shit about what really happened. He admits so himself later on, he keeps asking Sirius questions later on. And yet again he's so ready to believe Sirius,

Professor Lupin came hurtling into the room, his face bloodless, his wand raised an ready. His eyes flickered over Ron, lying on the floor, over Hermione, cowering next to the door, to Harry, standing there with his wand covering Black, and then to Black himself, crumpled and bleeding at Harry's feet. 'Expelliarmus!' Lupin shouted. [...] Lupin caught them all defty then moved into the room, staring at Black, who still had Crookshanks lying protectively across his chest. [...] Then Lupin spoke, in an odd voice, a voice that shook with some suppressed emotion. 'Where is he, Sirius?' [...] Black's face was quite expressionless. For a few seconds, he didn't move at all. Then, very slowly, he raised his empty hand, and pointed straight at Ron. 'But then… Lupin muttered, staring at Black so intently it seemed he was trying to read his mind. “'Why hasn’t he shown himself before now? Unless...-' Lupin's eyes suddenly widened, as though he was seeing something beyond Black, something none of the rest could see, '-unless he was the one… unless you switched… without telling me?' Very slowly, his sunken gaze never leaving Lupin’s face, Black nodded. [...] Lupin lowered his wand. Next moment, he had walked to Black's side, seized his hand, pulled hm to his feet so that Crookshanks fell to the floor, and embraced Black like a brother.

And then he says, still without having received any explanation, just like that,

'I haven't been Sirius' friend for twelve years, but I am now... let me explain...'

They are so in synch with their actions without even having to talk about it; they're forming a united front (I'm getting to that later on), they're again reaching a silent understanding just by looking at one another (again),

Both Black and Lupin strode forwards, seized Pettigrew's shoulders and threw him backwards onto the floor. [...] Black and Lupin stood shoulder to shoulder, wands raised. [...] Black and Lupin both looked staggered. [...] Black and Lupin were looking at each other. Then, with one movement, they lowered their wands.

I think it's also important to note that they do not just look, but look to check for each other's opinion on the matter. Harry asks them not to murder Peter and of course they listen to him, but they first look at each other as if checking to be on the same page. So - they've just reunited after over twelve years and immediately take the other person into consideration (I'm getting to that later on).

Then in OotP there's the famous fourty line stare where Remus is just intently staring at Sirius while he and Molly are arguing, as opposed to the others who are watching the conversation (who does that?),

'Lupin, who had been about to take a sip of whine, lowered his goblet slowly, looking wary' [...] Lupin's eyes were fixed on Sirius. [fourty lines of back and forth between Molly and Sirius] 'Personally,' said Lupin quietly, looking away from Sirius at last.

And it's not just Remus doing it. It's mutual. They act like a unit (again, getting to that). They care for each other's opinion and they do know each other so well that a single fleeting look is enough for them to check in with the other,

He [Harry] thought he saw Sirius and Lupin exchange the most fleeting of looks before Sirius answered [...]

And again when Harry contacts them via floo to discuss Snape's Worst Memory, they do it again,

They exchanged a look of great surprise [...] Lupin glanced sideways at Sirius, then said, [...]

They communicate via touch, too:

Black's wand arm rose, but Lupin seized him around the wrist, gave him a warning look, then turned again to Pettigrew, his voice light and casual [...]

So - Remus does not only convince headstrong Sirius to back down nonverbally just by looking and touching him, no I think it's also important to note that Remus, who isn't a 'touch person' (he's awkward when comforting Molly, he (as far as I recall) never hugs Harry, always just shakes hands), doesn't even seem to think twice about touching Sirius. No, he immediately pulls him into a hug, then is restraining him physically when he tries to launch at Scabbers, then continues to communicate via looks and touch. After twelve years of separation he's immediately comfortable enough to initiate it.

They're super in synch - also with how they say things

It carries through the whole of OotP, really. Sirius says something just for Remus to say something immediately afterwards or the other way around. When they're together in a scene, the vibe is always them carrying the conversation together, one adding to the other's thoughts.

It already starts in PoA,

'They didn't say what they thought they saw !' said Black savagely [...]. 'Everyone thought Sirius killed Peter,', said Lupin nodding.

But in OotP it's taken to whole new levels. It's too much to put here, but in that conversation where they tell Harry about the Order it's basically:

said Sirius / said Lupin /said Sirius /said Lupin... throughout the whole scene. One of them says something and the other one adds. And again. And again. And again.

And it happens again (though not to that extent) before Harry's Ministry hearing. In the Boggart scene. And then again when they discuss 'Snape's Worst Memory'.

They're also portrayed as being close to one another (distance-wise) repeatedly throughout OotP.

Like when Remus is there chances are Sirius isn't far. That doesn't have to mean anything of course but the frequency puts out a certain vibe to me,

'I said - shut - UP!', roared the man [Sirius] and with a stupendous effort he and Lupin managed to force the curtains closed again

Honestly, I think it's kind of funny that even when there're a number of people the two of them are always mentioned right after one another. Before Harry's ministry hearing, at Ron and Hermione's party, when Mrs Weasley is battling the Boggart, in the Department of Mysteries,

He pushed it open and saw Mr and Mrs Weasley, Sirius, Lupin and Tonks sitting at [...] Sirius, Lupin, Tonks and Kingsley Shacklebolt were already there Lupin had come running into the room, closely followed by Sirius [...] [...] and five more people sprinted into the room: Sirius, Lupin, Moody, Tonks and Kingsley.

And then when Harry floos to see Sirius after he has seen 'Snape's Worst Memory' Remus is there again-, casually sitting at the table and reading and Harry mistakes him for Sirius even (because he's looking so at home?). But Remus immediately knows where to fetch Sirius and comes back with him quickly after. That just has such a domestic vibe to me.

[...] long wooden table where a man sat poring over a piece of parchment. [...] 'Sirius'? [...] It was not Sirius, it was Lupin. [...] 'I'll call him,' said Lupin. [...] And Harry saw Lupin hurry out of the kitchen. [...] Lupin returned with Sirius at his heels moments after.

Remus and his relationship to his friends

Remus mentions Sirius first when he speaks about his friends, although in every other occasion it's always James who's mentioned first. He always says 'James and Sirius'/'your father and Sirius'; it's always James first, Sirius second, but when he's talking about him finding friends for the first time in his life, it's suddenly Sirius first,

'I had friends, three great friend. Sirius Black... Peter Pettigrew... and, of course, your father, Harry - James Potter.'

I don't think that necessarily means anything though, but I felt like adding it just for the sake of it... (I know the author stated James supported Remus after Hogwarts, not Sirius, implying they were (always) closer, but - and that's just my general personal approach - I don't care much for what she said in any Interviews/on pottermore/wizardingworld.com or whatever. She's contradicting herself so often there (see below). To me it's always books first and the books show that Remus and Sirius are close as adults whereas we don't have much information about Remus/James).

Then Remus is very obviously operating on double standards when it comes to Sirius as opposed to Peter. In his conversation with Harry it's insinuated that he doesn't want Sirius, who he believes to have betrayed Lily and James and killed Peter and twelve others, to receive the Dementor's kiss.

'He deserves it,' he [Harry] said suddenly. 'You think so?' said Lupin lightly. 'Do you really think anyone deserves that?

Yet later when he learns the truth he has no qualms whatsoever about killing Peter. He doesn't stop Sirius, he doesn't hesitate, he's joinng in. Why's this so different suddenly? Selling away your friends lives and framing your other friend (Peter) isn't worse than selling away your friends' lives and killing your other friend (allegedly Sirius), is it? So if their 'alleged' crimes are comparable, why is Remus acting different about Peter's than he is about Sirius's?

'Shall we kill him together?' 'Yes, I think s,' said Lupin grimly.

It's not about him thinking the Dementor's kiss was worse than death either. Because he as no qualms to bring Peter to the Dementors when Harry stops them from murdering him. So... why the double standards again?

Sirius/Remus also so do 'relationship behaviour'. I mean the whole nonverbal communication already, but also,

'Sirius, sit down.' [...] Sirius sank slowly back into his chair, his face white.

Remus gets Sirius even after over twelve years of being separated. Sirius is impatient in PoA, because he - finally - wants to take revenge on Peter. Remus not only sees that but tries to stop him. To me it reads as if he knows that Harry's opinion is important to Sirius, will be, once he sees clearly again and that he doesn't want him to destroy his chances with Harry by acting too impulsive. Because his intervention isn't rooted in his concern for Peter's life obviously, because he's ready to kill Peter once they explained everything,

'[...] I think Molly's right, Sirius. We've said enough.' Sirius half-shrugged, but did not argue. 'I'm coming up there to have a word with Snape!' said Sirius forcefully, and he actually made to stand up, but Lupin wrenched him back down again. 'If anyone's going to tell Snape it will be me!' he said firmly

Sirius doesn't exactly react well to being emasculated (and that's an understatement). He doesn't react well when Harry doesn't want him to come ro Hogsmeade as Padfoot - he lashes out and answers with a low-blow ('You're less like your father than I thought '). And yes, that's in OotP where his mental health isn't the best. But the rest of those scenes also happen in OotP. And he lets Remus call the shots, lets Remus stop him, in front of all the others. Remus is giving him a direct order like he is a f**** dog (not going deeper into this because I *hate* all those pup/pet play fics) and Sirius does not only not fight back, he complies. I'm not saying he respects/likes Remus more than Harry, I'm just using this example to point out that, considering Sirius's character it's a really big deal.

Remus understands Sirius and is looking out for him

'Sirius, NO!, Lupin yelled, launching himself forwards and dragging Black away from Ron again. “WAIT! You can’t do it just like that - they need to understand - we’ve got to explain -“ 'We can explain afterwards!,' snarled Black, trying to throw Lupin off, one hand still clawing the air as the tried to reach Scabbers, who was squealing like a piglet, scratching Ron’s face and neck as he tried to escape. 'They’ve - got - a - right - to - know - everything!,' Lupin panted, still trying to restrain Black. 'Ron’s kept him as a pet! There are parts of it even I don’t understand! And Harry - you owe Harry the truth'

And then again he's stepping in when Sirius is not doing himself any favor with Harry (again),

'And why did he fake this death?' he [Harry] said furiously. 'Because he knew you were about to kill him like you killed my parents.' 'No', said Lupin. 'Harry-' 'And now you've come to finish him off!' 'Yes, I have,' said Black, with an evil look at Scabbers. 'Then I should've let Snape take you!' Harry shouted. 'Harry,', said Lupin hurriedly, 'don't you see? All this time we've thought Sirius betrayed your parents, and Peter tracked him down - but it was the other way around, don't you see? Peter betrayed your mother and father - Sirius tracked Peter down-'

And then Remus is stepping in - again - when it's getting too much for Sirius,

'Harry... I as good as killed them', he [Sirius] croaked. 'I persuaded Lily and James to change to Peter at the last moment [...] I was scared. I set out for your parents' house straight away. And when I saw their house, destroyed and their bodies - I realized what Peter must'v done. What I'd done.' His voice broke. He turned away 'Enough of this,' said Lupin, and there was a steely note in his voice Harry had never heard before.

And in this scene in OotP he's also looking out for him,

'I'm coming up there to have a word with Snape!' said Sirius forcefully, and he actually made to stand up, but Lupin wrenched him back down again. 'If anyone's going to tell Snape it will be me!' he said firmly

They're forming a united front - not once, but it's a recurring motive.

Both are ready to handle the whole Peter thing together. They haven't seen each other for over twelve years, they didn't part on good terms and still they're immediately including the other. Even Sirius who's (in this situation) either failing to see how his behavior isn't doing him any good with building a relationshio with Harry or is incapable of stopping himself, is including Remus,

'Ready, Sirius' said Lupin [...] 'Together?' he [Sirius] said quietly. ‘I think so', said Lupin [...]

And then again, they're ready to kill him together, too,

'Of course,' said Black, and the ghost of a grin flitted across his gaunt face. He, too, began rolling up his sleeves. 'Shall we kill him together?' 'Yes, I think so,' said Lupin grimly.

And also non-verbally they're an united front (see above),

Then they're portrayed as 'shoulder to shoulder' (figuratively speaking) in other situations as well. Remus is taking Sirius's side in the argument with Molly although he has no business doing so, although he usually prefers to stay in the background. He's usually keeping quiet, usually not speaking up - Molly even thinks she's getting an ally when he joins the conversation,

'Personally,' said Lupin quietly, looking away from Sirius at last, as Mrs Weasley turned quickly to him, hopeful that finally she was about to get an ally. 'I think it better that Harry gets the facts - not all the facts, Molly, but the general picture - from us, rather than a garbled version from ... others.' [...] 'Molly you're not the only person at this table who cares about Harry', said Lupin sharply.

Remus is always taking Sirius's Side - he keeps making excuses for James and Sirius's behavior at Hogwarts, he keeps playing it down - even as an adult. He's damn biased, he doesn't move an inch - as long as they're in public at least,

'Sirius thought it would be - er - amusing, to tell Snape all he had to do was prod the knot on the tree-trunk with a long stick and he’d be able to get in after me.'

'a schoolboy grudge' [Remus to Snape]

Lupin looked sideways at Sirius, then aid, 'Look, Harry, what you've got to understand is that your father and Sirius were the best in the school at whatever they did - everyone thought they were the height of cool - if they sometimes got a bit carried away-' 'If we were sometimes arrogant little berks, you mean',, said Sirius. Lupin smiled.

And I think it's important to point out that Remus does this even though it's not his real stance on the matter,

'[...] it would be - er - amusing, to tell Snape [...]' 'We were in the same year, you know and we - er - didn’t like each other very much. He especially disliked James. Jealous, I think, of James’s talent on the Quidditch pitch…'

The 'er' and 'I think' is a speech pattern of his that indicates he's not being completely honest/doesn't truly believe what he says. ('So he - er - accidentally let slip that I am a werewolf this morning at breakfast.' / 'Er - perhaps it will be best if we don’t revive him until we’re safely back in the castle.). He doesn't truly think they were as harmless as he's portraying it ('Did I ever have the guts to tell you I thought you were ought of order?').

So - united front on the outside, no matter what. But it's insinuated that behind closed doors Remus is taking a different stance. He's blaming himself for not stepping in with the whole Snape thing, because that's just who he is - blaming himself for everything (sometimes rightfully so, sometimes not) While I do think he didn't say anything outwardly, there must have been something that made it clear to the others that Remus didn't approve of their behavior,

'Of course he was a bit of an idiot,' said Sirius bracingly, 'we were all idiots! Well - Moony not so much', he said fairly, looking at Lupin. But Remus shook his head. 'Did I ever tell you to lay off Snape?”' he said. 'Did I ever have the guts to tell you I thought you were out of order?' 'Yeah, well', said Sirius, 'you made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes… that was something….'

Remus is suddenly living at Grimmauld Place

So at the end of GoF Remus obviously has his own place (or is living with his father again, although he didn't want to because he didn't want to disturb his quiet life according to the author? But then again I don't care what she said on Pottermore).

'Sirius, I need you to set off at once. You are to alert Remus Lupin, Arabella Figg, Mundungus Fletcher —the old crowd. Lie low at Lupin's for a while, I will contact you there.'

So that's at the end of June. And then at the beginning of August when Harry arrives in London, just six weeks later, he's living at Grimmauldplace already, and not only at Grimmauld Place, he's living with Sirius

Lupin, who was staying at the house with Sirius but who left it for long periods to do mysterious work for the Order [...]

And then rhey give away joint Christmas presents,

Sirius and Lupin had given Harry a set of excellent books entitled Practical Defensive Magic and its Use Against the Dark Arts, which had superb, moving colour illustrations of all the counter-jinxes and hexes it described.

They act differently with / because of one another

Sometimes they even defy their core character traits.

Remus's primal drive in everything he does is to be liked/fit in/be seen as good by others (and not as the monster he sees himself as deep down). He's even sometimes manipulative and hypocritical because of it. For example he doesn't tell Dumbledore about Sirius's animagus form because of it (or at least it's part of the reason, or he believes it to be). But when Snape enters the Shrieking Shack he doesn't care about himself getting into trouble for - allegedly - helping a supposed mass murderer break into the castle and everything. Even though he stated before that he didn't tell Dumbledore about Sirius for fear of losing his respect, all he cares about suddenly is Sirius's safety:

'Severus, you're making a mistake,' said Lupin urgently. 'You haven't heard everything - I can explain - Sirius is not here to kill Harry-' [...] 'You fool,' said Lupin softly. 'Is a schoolboy grudge worth putting an innocent man back inside Azkaban.'

Also Remus is able to get through to Sirius even in a state of utmost agitation. Sirius is trying to murder Peter and Remus stops him and Sirius listens, even though his goal is finally in reach. Although, up to that point, he didn't exactly act very sensible (slashing the Fat Lady, breaking into Harry's dorm with a knife),

'All right then,' Black said, without taking his eyes off the rat. “Tell them whatever you like. But make it quick, Remus. I want to commit the murder I was imprisoned for…'

And he continues to listen to Remus, Remus continues to be able to get through to him even when he's getting emotional. And Remus, who's always trying to appear mild (for fear of being perceived as aggressive which he can not afford because of the werewolf-thing), who even spoke quietly before in that very same conversation, is losing parts of his composure when Sirius is attacked,

“Molly, you’re not the only person at this table who cares about Harry”, said Lupin sharply. “Sirius, sit down.” Molly’s lower lip was trembling. Sirius sank slowly back into his chair, his face white.

Remus is letting loose around him (and the other marauders). He quips,

'Did you like question ten, Moony?' asked Sirius as they emerged to the Entrance Hall. 'Loved it,' said Lupin briskly. 'Give five signs that identify the werewolf. Excellent question.' 'D’you think you managed to get all the signs?,' said James in tones of mock concern. 'Think I did,' said Lupin seriously, as they joined the crowd thronging around the front doors eager to get out into the sunlit grounds. 'One: he’s sitting on my chair. Two: he’s wearing my clothes. Three: his name’s Remus Lupin.'

'Well, as everyone thinks I’m a mad mass-murderer and the Ministry’s put a ten thousand Galleon price on my head, I can hardly stroll up the street and start handing out leaflets, can I?,' said Sirius restlessly. 'And I’m not a very popular dinner guest with most of the community,' said Lupin. “It’s an occupational hazard of being a werewolf.'

[As @remusawoooo put it: let's form a comedy duo <3]

And Remus is obviously very comfortable with Sirius. He's always restraining himself, Harry narrates his way of speaking as 'mild' or 'quiet' so many times, but apparently he's different when he's alone with Sirius. That hints at a great level of trust. He doesn't bother to keep up his act around him, because he doesn't worry about being perceived as mild with him and just speaks his truth ( e.g. about Umbridge). He can just be and oh boy, thinking about Remus's character that has to be the greatest fucking deal ever.

'I know she's a nasty piece of work, though - you should hear Remus talk about her.'

And then Remus, who is so good at appearing restrained, is losing his composure when Sirius dies,

'He can’t come back, Harry,' said Lupin, his voice breaking as he struggled to contain Harry. 'He can’t come back, because he’s d-' [...] Lupin's face was pale. [...] Lupin turned away from the archway as he spoke. It sounded as if every word were causing him pain.

In this moment Harry himself is in huge (emotional) pain, but he still notices - must've been rather obvious, then?

Edit (because it's been pointed out to me): and then Remus goes into self-destruction mode after Sirius's death, signing off for dangerous Order missions, obviously falling into some sort of depression..

Their mutual respect for one another

So, I've read how Sirius wouldn't/couldn't possibly respect Remus / see him as an equal. How they wouldn't fully 'trust' one another. No matter if you 'see' Wolfstar or not, that is just plain wrong.

Sirius respected Remus already as a teenager. He (and James, too), cared for his opinion, otherwise they wouldn't have been affected by whatever he thought about their bullying. But they were ('you made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes').

The whole Sirius thinking Remus was the spy thing also shows that he respected him. He saw him as capable - not just as capable of betraying his friends, but also as a capable person in general, a person with an own agenda, not just a copy of him or James. He didn't see Peter like that.

Sirius lets Remus take the lead in the scene in the Shrieking Shack even though the whole taking revenge on Peter/avenging James (James!) thing is most important to him. He does not only let himself be swayed by Remus and lowers his wand instead of killing Peter right after they forced him to transform, he also let's Remus lead the conversation. To me that shows a huge level of trust. He only joins in after Peter accused him of having learned tricks from Voldemort. But before that it's just Remus talking for some paragraphs?

And Sirius listens to Remus not only in that scene, but also in OotP. First he sits down again in his argument with Molly simply because Remus told him so. Then he's waiting for Remus to come back to the room before he even starts telling Harry about the Order business.

Lupin hurried of to the portrait to restore calm. It was only after he had returned, closing the kitchen door behind him and taking hs seat at the table again, that Sirius spoke.

Then he just accepts when Remus says they've said enough without arguing,

'[...] I think Molly's right, Sirius. We've said enough.' Sirius half-shrugged, but did not argue.

Headstrong Sirius, who's even challenging Dumbledore's orders by insisting on telling Harry stuff, who's challenging Dumbledore's orders by accompanying Harry to King's Cross (as Padfoot), who's willing to challenge Dumbledore's orders when he suggests meeting up at Hogsmeade (as Padfoot). But Remus says we've said enough and he is just like 'okay'. Remus says 'sit down' and despite him having been attacked personally he just does. He clearly respects him a great deal.

On a more subtle note (and maybe I'm reading too much into the source material here, but it makes sense to me)... The Prank was not a big deal in canon. At least not initially. But adult Remus tells us in PoA,

'That was still really dangerous! Running around in the dark with a werewolf! What if you’d given the others the slip and bitten somebody?' [Hermione] 'A thought that still haunts me,' said Remus heavily. 'And there were near misses, many of them. We laughed about them afterwards. We were young, thoughtless - carried away with our own cleverness. I sometimes felt guilty about betraying Dumbledore’s trust, of course… he had admitted me to Hogwarts when no other headmaster would have done so and he had no idea I was breaking the riles he had set down for my own and others’ safety.[...]'

And he's still making excuses for the prank in this scene and Sirius still says how, 'it served him [Snape] right'

But then in OotP when they discuss Snape's Worst Memory with Harry, Sirius obviously has some introspection and to me it easily reads as if they had talked about that behavior - as adults,

'I'm not proud of it,' said Sirius quickly. Lupin looked sideways at Sirius, then said, 'Look, Harry [...] if they sometimes got a bit carried away-' 'If we were sometimes arrogant little berks you mean,' said Sirius. Lupin smiled.

He cuts him off and to me it reads like, 'okay Remus, you can stop making excuses for me'. Maybe adult Sirius came to that conclusion himself with being out of Azkaban for almost two years at this point. He's certainly emotionally intelligent enough to do so. But then again, he's incredibly blind when it comes to Snape in general, even as an adult, so I'm not so sure about that.

Other things

Sirius was lounging in his chair at his ease, tilting it back on two legs. He was very good-looking, his dark hair fell into his eyes with a sort of casual elegance neither James's nor Harry's could ever have achieved, and a girl sitting behind him was eyeing him hopefully, though he didn't seem to have noticed. And two seats along from this girl - Harry's stomach gave another pleasurable squirm - was Remus lupin.

I personally think that's over-interpreting the source material, but I've read someone pointing out how it reads like,

'Hormonal male teen doesn't care for the attention of a teenage girl, why could that be, why could that be... oh, here's why: ...'

(let's not forget about asexual people though)

The Original source material getting ridiculously obvious without the author intending so

Okay, so I personally don't set great store by this, but I think it's funny:

Their names being the biggest cliche ever

Remus 'Moony' Lupin and Sirius ' the Dog Star' Black. Moon and stars, come on. All this from an author who's taking the name game to ridiculous levels. (I mean Remus Lupin = Wolf-son Wolf?, even Lyall = Wolf. And Sirius = the Dog Star Black. And he's a black dog.... really?)

Nearly matching Patroni

They have (supposedly) nearly matching Patroni. Remus's is a wolf while Sirius's is supposedly a dog because it usually aligns with the caster's Animagus form. Anyhow, it's supposed to reflect the caster's personality. Matching Patroni are a huge deal in HP. And a wolf and a dog are pretty damn close, meaning that even if they're not 'matching' technically speaking, they (the caster) are pretty damn close character-wise?

But what about...?

All your 'proof' doesn't necessarily mean they're a thing romantically

No, that's right. I'm not saying wolfstar is canon, I'm just saying it makes sense, even from a canon perspective. Obviously the author didn't intend them to be canon. My point is that it's no stretch to read them as being a thing (whatever that means - being together or just having some sort of unresolved feelings) even in canon.

I'm aware that the things I pointed out don't mean much if you look at them individually. I agree. Like, of course joint presents don't have to mean anything, maybe Sirius is just being 'nice', is including Remus. But it's the sum that give off that vibe—at least to me.

But hey, I'm not trying to convince anyone of Wolfstar; I'm just trying to elaborate. I'd be happy if we could all agree that, no matter any romantic feelings, they were very close friends. Because that, as I hope to have pointed out, is definitely canon.

They don't make sense because of the prank

First - they don't have necessarily to have been a thing back in fifth year already.

Second - the prank was no big deal in canon. I've already ranted about this in another post, so I won't repeat myself here. But canonically Remus didn't make a scene. Like it or not, think it's in character or not, but he didn't.

But Sirius disregards Remus's feelings in 'Snape's worst memory

So this is, what we're talking about, right,

'I’m bored,' said Sirius. 'Wish it was full moon.' 'You might', said Lupin darkly.

Again, they don't have to have necessarily been a thing back in fifth year already. Most of the 'show' we get from the original source material is from when they're adults.

And: Sirius being flippant is just how he is, it's not unique to his relationship with Remus, it doesn't mean he disrespects Remus or anything. He's sarcastic with James in that very same scene, too, even though James had just been insulted and turned down by Lily in front of numerous bystanders (maybe not the nicest thing to do?).

'Bad luck, Prongs' [...] 'Reading between the lines I'd say she thinks you're a bit conceited, mate.'

We - as a fandom - are turning the full moons into a much bigger deal than they were - or at least than Remus wanted them to be. ('And they didn’t desert me at all. Instead they did something for me that would make my transformations not only bearable, but the best times of my life. They became Animagi.')

But Sirius thought Remus was the spy - they couldn't have been close in 1981

'Being close' is a matter of definition, like, I can be super hurt and disgusted by someone's behaviour and still the person can mean a lot to me. So I think it's possible that they cared for each other even though Sirius suspected Remus to be the spy. But in the sense of them 'emotionally getting' each other I definitely agree. But - even if they weren't close in 1981 - what does that say about their teenage years? Or about them past PoA? Right, nothing.

But Lily's letter didn't even mention Remus and Remus isn't standing with them in the Order photograph

See above.

But you don't just move past something like mistrusting each other so deeply

Maybe you don't. They did. Because they did, no matter what you think about wolfstar. Btw, Sirius is asking for Remus's forgiveness, so there's that for the whole 'he can't forgive him for not having him gotten out of Azkaban'-thing.

'Forgive me Remus', said Black. 'Not at all, Padfoot, old friend,' said Lupin, who was now rolling up his sleeves. 'And will you, in turn, forgive me for believing you were the spy?' 'Of course,' said Black, and the ghost of a grin flitted across his gaunt face.

The ghost of a grin. Yes, Sirius is obviously very resentful.

And even if they had a chat about it during 'Lie low at Lupin's', even if they worked through some old baggage - by the beginning of OotP they're definitely super casual with one another.

Their whole dynamic is super toxic... The mistrust and everything. That's not a healthy basis for anything

Unfortunately, being toxic doesn't stop people from being in a relationship. But I don't think they are toxic, not necessarily. While I agree that they definitely have issues (I don't see either of them being good at healthy communication; how were they supposed to learn? Besides, both of them have problematic character traits), I do think, in general, they treat each other with respect. And there's no evidence whatsoever for either of them holding grudges about the spy situation. I know people want Sirius to be resentful because they feel Remus deserves it for letting him 'rot' in Azkaban, but there's no evidence for that.

But Sirius didn't seek out Remus's help in PoA when he was after Peter

That would have been risky, wouldn't it? And I don't think there was much on Sirius's mind except for the revenge thing. Sirius is usually quite calm and way less dramatic than fanon makes him out to be. But he loses it completely with the whole Peter affair. I mean slashing the Fat Lady and acting like the mad mass murderer everyone thinks him to be by breaking into Harry's dorm with that knife? (Stupid and also super risky with no wand)

But Sirius isn't with Remus in GoF but rather lives in a cave

Yes, to be close to Harry. Because Harry is his top priority (see below). So what does that prove? He's rather with Harry than with Remus. Agreed. But it's not like he was roaming the UK instead of being at Remus's before. He was somewhere south, far far away to evade seizure. He only comes back because of Harry.

It's understandable, because he feels responsible for Harry (and perhaps guilty because he blames himself for James's death). He doesn't feel responsible for Remus, who is a grown man - and Remus's safety isn't at stake. His own safety is more important than just being with his friend/lover/whatever, but it's not more important than Harry's safety. I think that's a pretty healthy dynamic actually.

Harry doesn't notice so they can't be a thing

Harry is great at noticing some things. Others, not so much. For example Harry thinks Tonks is in love with Sirius, so so much for Harry's perceptiveness. The books being from Harry's perspective is part of the point of Wolfstar making sense.

What about James?

What about James? Is this a contest? No one says Sirius and James weren't best friends (I won't step into the shipping James/Sirius debate here, I respect the ship eve though it isn't my cup of tea). We all agree they were super close. We all agree they were inseparable and that Sirius was devastated about James's death. Following this line of argument Jily makes no sense either (as @myheadsgonenumb pointed out). People are capable of loving their partners (or loving someone unrequitedly or loving someone without realizing) and having a close best friend at the same time.

Plus, who's to say he wouldn't have been devastated if Remus had died, too? People have the ability to care deeply about more than one person (and again, it's not a contest)

BANG! Thin, snake-like cords burst from the end of Snape’s wand and twisted themselves around Lupin’s mouth, wrists and ankles; he overbalanced and fell to the floor, unable to move. With a roar of rage, Sirius started toward Snape, [...]

Yes, Sirius is obviously completely indifferent to what happens to Remus.

BUT it does annoy me that a lot of wolfstar fics are erasing James / are turning Remus into everything James was for Sirius. Like James was just a side character for.Sirius. That's unrealistic. Sirius needs James, Wolfstar or not.

But it's stated Sirius and James only cared for each others opinions, no one else's

Is it really? I've basically already tackled that one above, but, while I agree that they were most important to one another, Sirius himself says to Remus, 'Yeah, well. You made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes… that was something….'

What about Harry - the books state he was the most important person to Sirius (and vice versa), not Remus?

Agreed and again - is it a contest? That line of reasoning would mean that parents aren't capable of loving their partners because they have children.

But Sirius wouldn't be with someone who let Harry suffer at his aunt's / who allegedly endangered Harry's life in PoA by withholding information from Dumbledore...

He wouldn't? The backbone of this argument is that Sirius would not trust/forgive someone who did these things. And wether you ship wolfstar or not, that is just canonically wrong. They were canonically close in OotP (see quotes above) - if you're negating this you're being delusional.

I don't think I have to deep-dive into Sirius's character here because it's obvious that he didn't hold a grudge against Remus.

Remus is too much of a loser for Sirius to want him as a partner

I feel like that's pretty much the same argument, so it get's pretty much the same answer: He wouldn't?

The backbone of this argument is that Sirius was too cool for Remus, had not enough respect for Remus, which is, canonically simply not true. No matter if you like it, no matter if you think it makes sense considering Sirius's character, it's fact that adult Sirius respected him very much. He listened to him, he cared for his opinion, he backed down because of him, he allowed Remus to take the lead. He doesn't treat him as inferior. Not a single time.

But Sirius is so much better than Remus, he has a better moral code, he's a better man, a better [insert statement here]...

Again - it doesn't matter much if you think so, or what I think about it. But Sirius didn't think so. Not a single proof he's resentful towards Remus, not a single proof he thinks Remus is inferior to him, not a single proof he doesn't respect him. The opposite actually.

But Remus is such a pushover, it just doesn't fit personality-wise. Sirius needs someone strong

Is Remus really? Because he isn't as an adult. At least not as long as he isn't concerned personally.

I see Remus as someone with deep-rooted self-worth issues, hence he's struggling to stand up for himself (his worst decisions are all linked to his poor self-esteem). But he has no problem in PoA to stand up to Snape (in the scene in the Shack), he has no problem to stand up to Sirius (multiple times in that scene), he has no problem to take the lead in the conversation with Peter. He has no problem to stand up to Molly when she's attacking Sirius and he tells Sirius to leave it to him to deal with Snape when they learn that Snape stopped giving Harry Occlumency lessons (and wrenches him down again). He's not as gentle/soft/pushover-y as people sometimes think.

Besides, we don't know much about how he really was as a teenager. He himself says that he didn't call them out for the whole Snape thing, but his self-perception isn't the best and he tends to blame himself for everything, so we don't really know how true that really is... As mentioned before, Sirius himself says,

''Yeah, well. You made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes… that was something….'

And also (before that),

'Of course he was a bit of an idiot,' said Sirius bracingly, 'we were all idiots! Well - Moony not so much.'

But Sirius is depressive in OotP - the long hair, the drinking, his moods...

Yes, of course, he's trapped in his childhood home without being able to do anything, he's feeling useless. No wonder he's depressed. Having a relationship doesn't save you from depression (although having no fulfilling platonic/romantic relationships at all can be a major factor for getting depressed).

If one or two pillars have crumbled that is possibly already enough for the roof to tumble down - even though the third is still standing (surprise!).

[On a personal note: I know what I'm talking about (although not everyone's experience is the same obvs) because I'm suffering from depression despite having a wonderful partner, great sisters and great friends.]

But Harry inherited all of Sirius's money/belongings when he died, not Remus.

I don't know about you, but I don't peg Remus as somebody who would've accepted it. Apart from that, Remus was an adult whom Sirius saw as an equal, just as capable as himself, whereas Harry was Sirius's godchild, whom he felt responsible for (and probably still guilty towards).

But Sirius had his wall plastered with pictures of bikini-clad girls

And I had a poster of my favorite (male) singer over my bed at the age of fourteen. Guess what, I'm not straight.

What about Remadora?

I'm not stepping into the 'Is Remus gay'/'Is Remus bisexual' debate right here because I don't think it's necessary. Remadora was after Sirius's death. Period.

And the whole Remadora ship is awful - for both of them. @lizlemonbennet wrote a beautiful post about that

Tonks deserved better - she was so unhappy pining after him, it was literally sucking joy and confidence out of her (her hair changed and her Patronus changed). Lets talk about her Patronus actually. Before Remus it was a rabbit, after she fell in love with him it was a wolf. If Patroni represent your personality, what does it say about you when your Patronus is your lover's literal prey? To me that's a pretty obviously unhealthy dynamic.

But you're erasing women from the story

No, we're not. Wolfstar was a thing before Remadora and Sirius doesn't even have a canonic love interest. Besides - I love Jily and doesn't Hermione get paired with just about anyone?

But the author stated on wizardingworld.com that Remus had never fallen in love before he met Tonks.

I think the whole killing off Sirius and marrying off Remus thing was just the author dealing with fans interpreting her story in a way she didn't like. So, that's point Pro Wolfstar in my book. Either way, I don't care much about what she wrote on Wizardingworld or elsewhere when it contradicts the original source material. Because the author contradicting herself in interviews, on Pottermore, with the films, and even within the books is really nothing new. Just a short list of her making no sense:

James Potter being a seeker, no a chaser, no a seeker, actually nvm

Saying that Snape was in a gang with the Lestranges ('a married couple') at school, when Bellatrix had already left school when Snape arrived at Hogwarts

Saying James was fifteen in 'Snape's Worst Memory' when he had to have been sixteen. It happened after O.W.L.s and students turn sixteen during their fifth year of school. With his birthday being stated as being in March in the very source material itself (DH), sorry, but that's just wrong.

The whole timeline of the Order deaths in 1981

Halloween 1981 being a Wednesday when it actually was a Saturday (Wednesday - Saturday, close, huh?). The story starts from Vernon Dursley's perspective who's on his way to work and Harry's been brought to Privet Drive the same evening. According to the 'real calendar' this means baby Harry spent over a day alone in the ruins of his parents' house? Cool

September first, 1993, being a full moon, meaning Remus has to have transformed on either the train ride to Hogwarts or during the Start of Term feast. Meet your need DADA professor, he's a werewolf, like, right now. Ups, I guess the jig is up.

Remus not transforming in PoA when he hurries to the Shack despite sun already having set just because the moon is blocked by clouds??? It's that easy to evade transformation, yes? Why not lock yourself in the basement, then?

.... (don't get me started on plot holes, I could rant about this to no end)

Other reasons the ship appeals to so many people

Friends to lovers (with a bit of enemies to lovers because of the spy thing?)

I don't have to elaborate on that do I?

Just the right measure of opposites attract / Like will to like - They're good together or at least have the potential to be

I didn't mean to turn this into some Remus Lupin / Sirius Black meta, but...

In some ways they are super similar. It's very important to both of them to be viewed as 'good' by others (although their definitions may differ). Remus because he needs that sort of validation because of his poor self-worth. Sirius needs to be seen as 'good' as opposed to his family. They get each other partly because they know how it's to be reduced to a single trait. But then they act very differently about it - Sirius plunges into action while Remus retreats and masks.

They're both dark in some ways; they were both ready to kill Peter.

James didn't believe one of his friends would betray him. Both Sirius and Remus weren't so naive (Although drawing the wrong conclusions):

You think I'm a fool?" demanded Harry. 'No, I think you're like James,' said Lupin, 'who would have regarded it as the height of dishonor to mistrust his friends.'

Remus is kind/gentle but he's also passive-aggressive at times and sometimes manipulative. Whereas Sirius is harsh, sometimes even cruel, but that means he's also blunt. That has the potential of them dragging one another away from the extremes a bit, meeting in the middle (although Sirius probably would be able to do so on his own, I think most times he simply doesn't care).

While Sirius is much less dramatic and rash than parts of the fandom make him out to be, he has a tendency to act impulsive (acting like a mad mass murderer when he breaks into the castle / wanting to murder Peter without thinking about what that means for his relationship with Harry / jumping to his feet to immediately have a word with Snape when he hears about him dropping the Occlumency lessons). He can do with some sort of counterforce just as Remus needs somebody who forces him to crawl out of his shell.

The drama

They get each other without really getting each other. Sirius thinking Remus is the spy is super tragic because he's (probably) in one way or another reducing him to the werewolf thing, which is the one thing that really hurts Remus.

But he doesn't do that for malicious intent - he does so because he sees Remus's struggle, because it makes sense to him and because he deems Remus capable. But he doesn't really *get* Remus. Because if he did, he would have realized that for Remus it was always most important to be liked/fit in. He'd never betray his friends' trust, because he's so grateful for having them in the first place. He would have rather died, - he doesn't think his life is worth much anyhow (as opposed to Peter). Remus would rather die than risk being shunned.

So he sees Remus but misses the point spectacularly. Which just breaks my heart. And still they're finding back to each other (as friends at least)

Goodbye

Thanks to everyone who's read that far. Again, I don't mean to bash any other ship, this is just about my 'love' for Wolfstar - canon wolfstar especially, meaning keeping their canon personalities and not erasing James or playing down his importance. Don't tell me I can't write a canon compliant Wolfstar story just because the fandom has transformed the characters into something else.

I'm also not saying that you have to read it the way I do, it's always interpretation anyhow. But I hope I managed to shed some light on the whole matter.

I didn't check the text because I didn't intend it to get that long tbh. I only had time to write it down because I'm sick at the moment. But I hope there's no holes or anything.

#Can we at least agree that they were close as adults? Bc that would already make me happy (and it's true)#wolfstar #wolfstar defender #remus x sirius #remus lupin #sirius black #marauders #marauders era

197 notes · View notes

metalotaku-da · 1 year ago

Text

So many cross overs so narrow of common hero choices. Let's expand a little.

"Rip what the hell is that?"

"It appears sir, to be a small human child. Around the developmental stage of 4-5"

"Even you know better than to cuss infront of kids.

"I was gone for five minutes."

"Actually I snapped you back to a minute after you left."

"Are You misser booser gol?"

"Yeah kid that's me. You a fan or something who got into something you shouldn't to find me?"

"No. Clockie said tis for you." Hands a sticky note to booster.

Note reads: this is Danny. You will care for him from now on. See this as payment for resetting your time line safely. If you even try pass him off to Bruce wayne/batman, I will ensure your entire familial line never touched time traversing. And you stayed forever trapped in the 31st century. -clockwork master ancient of all time. P.s. there is not conning your way out of this. I will hunt down every ancestor or decendant for all time.

"This looks very serious sir. Congratulations sir you are a father Now"

"Wow kid. Clockie must hate you. I'm so sorry."

"I'm not that bad of an option. Obviously I was judged better that batsy."

"Clockie ass hero I want to say wiff."

"OH kiddo and you asked for the greatest hero boostergold?"

"I wike space. He say geen lanern is space. He take care of me."

"I'm so sorry sir, you have already disappointed your new child. Should I take a commemorative photo of this milestone moment for you?"

"No" "yes skeets"

Camera flashes.

"I shall add this photo to a new album labeled baby book. It is labeled Danny's first disappointment, sir."

"Thank you skeets." X2 one sarcastic one pleased.

"I wan geen lanern."

"Think you're gonna need help anyway Micheal. Call one of them. Not guy."

"I would never co-parent with guy. What kind of idiot do you take me for?"

"Rip takes you as the utmost idiot sir. As does most of the justice league sir."

"Thanks skeets."

"You are most welcome sir."

"Can I pay wif the talking space ship?"

"Sure kid." Pushes skeets into the kids hands.

"I do not believe I am rated for physical interaction by children under 10 sir."

"To bad skeets." Picks up Danny who looks up at him instead of at skeets to smile all teeth. "Holy shit are those fangs? We are going to go see my friend Ted now. He will know what to do."

"He will atleast know not to cuss infront of kids. Don't know about the rest."

"Is ted geen lanern?"

Cue shenanigans. They were roommates, but adopted a child.

"Does Batman know you stole a child from him?" <- Jaime when he visits.

"Do not even joke like that. My existence is at stake."

"Batsy is the new beetle juice. In this house."

"Are You geen lanern?"

"Sorry kid I am blue beetle."

"Should I take a picture for Danny's third disappointment since becoming your child sir?"

"No skeets."

"3rd? How long you had him?"

"A week"

"Ouch. Hey kiddo why do you want to meet green lantern? Aren't these guys just as cool?"

"Considering the average human body temperature is 98.6 degrees I do not believe they qualify as cool sir." Jaime is picking up danny to hold on his hip.

"Clockie says geen lanern is space." Danny smiles.

"Are those fangs? Is this a meta kid? You like space? My scarab is from space. Isn't that just as... Oh My, no scarab!" Scarab starts to go into protect host mode while screaming danger desteoy threat in Jaime head just as Danny's eyes start to glow green at the statement and his mouth splits inhumanly wide with even more teeth. Ted and Michael scramble to grab Danny and move him away from Jaime till he gets control of the scarab again. But Danny has a death grip and won't let go of his new friend.

"I do believe sir that your new child qualifies as a meta. Should I take a picture to commemorate your child's first power demonstration sir?"

#dcxdp #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc #blue beetle #booster gold #ted kord #dc universe #danny phantom

459 notes · View notes

princessbiteme0o0 · 8 months ago

Note

Um this is like my first time asking but I have an idea which I really like so here I am asking!

So basically Ted is in theatre school with you and he your in the same class and you were paired up to do a scene of Romeo and Juliet. And there was a kissing scene you had to do.

In the evening Ted and you do into the theatre empty to practice the scene and you were really scared to do the kiss and he helps you out and then it slowly from a kiss gets more passionate and deep then… you two ended up doing the dirty in the theatre.

but during sex, he becomes more dominant and degrading like “imagine you took me like this infront of the class next week? You would look like a total whore.”

AHHH I HOPE ITS OK! and if you do it then I will give more ideas defo 💗

I adore you (and everyone that asks), having said that- this is BY FAR my favorite one 😭 Shakespeare is one of my favorite writers, along with Poe.

Thank you, Nonny and thank all of you that enjoy my writing!! It genuinely makes me SO HAPPY to see people enjoying and appreciating my writing.

Mainly for my home girl- @writingduhh 🩵🩵🩵

Having said all of that…

FIRST OF ALL- I don’t think Ted has a kinky bone in his body; I think he’s a cute lil vanilla baby, but fuck it we ball. MINORS DNI. I FEEL LIKE IT SHOULD BE OBVIOUS AT THIS POINT.

Warnings: smut, slight bullying, degradation, praise, sexual tension, arguments, (kinda enemies to lovers), slapping (not abusive- purely sexual), choking, spit kink, spanking?, fingering, p in v, creampie, breeding kink, unspoken daddy kink?, melodramatics, ‘pup’ and ‘puppy’ used (don’t judge me) but no pet play, As always, let me know if I need to add more 🩵

Shakespeare in Love (Teddy Nivison x Reader)

—🩵—🩵—

She thought she was far over having to work with him on this play. She thought it would be a simple one and done; that maybe he’d have a simple two or three liner part. However, the moment she read the names next to each character, she felt her heart drop to her stomach. There it had been, in big, bold letters:

Tybalt- Kyle Jean

Capulet- Chris River

Juliet- (Y/N Y/L/N)

Romeo- Ted Nivison

She still remembers the anger that she felt at him for even auditioning, the rage directed at the casting director, the dread she felt at knowledge of the script; but like any good actress, she played it off.

So now, she sat on stage, reading over the script while waiting for mister always late. Had it have been better (and easier) circumstances, she probably wouldn’t have noticed the door to the auditorium swinging open. Her eyes lifted and met his gaze, smirk and all. She felt a heated anger drop to the pit of her stomach, but that smirk caused a different kind of warmth to drop between her thighs. Rolling her eyes where she knew he could see, she stood to her feet while looking over the script once more.

She was a tall woman, she knew that, but he was so much taller. His shadow lingered over her and when she looked up at him, he wore a goofy grin, eyes boring into her. “You ready, Pumpkin?” He asked in a mocking tone that made her eye twitch for a moment.

“Don’t fucking call me that.” She grumbled softly, glaring up at him. He reached his hand out and his fingertips ghosted over her bare shoulder and down her collarbone.

“Why not?” He pouted lightly, fingertips brushing up her neck now. “I know it feels good.” He whispered the second part, winking at her and she raised her hand to slap him, before the director scolded her.

“(Y/N)! Let’s save our emotions for the audience, hmm?” He shouted over the talking students in the room. Everyone went quiet and turned their eyes to her, making a warm blush flood her cheeks.

“You’re so cute when you blush for me.” Ted teases softly, pinching her arm.

Today is going to be a long ass day…

—🩵—🩵—

She watched on with fake love in her eyes as Ted read off his lines like a beautiful poem, especially for her. He took her hand in his as he continued, voice warm and welcoming, as if it were a soft pillow for her to lie back on-

“If I profane with my unworthiest hand, this holy shrine, the gentle sin is this: My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.” The words weren’t his, but the look in his eyes and the way he said it so clearly to her made her body grow warm. My character, it’s just his character speaking to mine.

“Good Pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this; For saints have hands that pilgrims’ hands do not touch, and hand to hand is holy palmers kiss.” She spoke skeptically, eyes watching his every move. As he moved his body closer to hers, she had to fight the urge to step back. She could practically feel the magnetic urgency trying to pull them together, but she denied it, craving the comfortability in safety. His hand carefully raised to her jaw, cupping it with a gentle palm.

“Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?” His voice was softer, careful almost, as if he was afraid of her pulling away. Taking in a sharp breath, she paused a moment, seemingly forgetting her lines- though she was quick to steady herself.

“Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.” She placed a careful hand on his chest in an attempt to push him away, but he slipped an arm around her waist, fingertips resting in the small of her back. She knew it was coming, yet the more he touched her, the harder it was to keep up the boundaries she held.

“O then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do. They pray: grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.” His words were a deep rumbling whisper as his other hand slid up the side of her body. His fingertips gently massaged a path up her shoulder, her collarbone, just to rest carefully on her jawline. His thumb carefully ran over the apple of her cheeks as she struggled to find her line once more.

“Saints do not move, though grant for prayers’ sake.” Her mouth ran dry as he leaned forwards ever-so-slightly. She felt heat strike through her body and liquid heat pool in between her legs.

“Then move not while my prayer’s effect I take.” His voice is deep rumble that vibrates her to her very core. When he leant down and pressed his lips carefully to hers, her world suddenly burst into vibrant colors, warmth immersing the room in the fireworks that flew between them. Both parties had a difficult time pulling apart, but she managed to pull away, only to realize she had a firm grip on his hair. Swallowing the lump in his throat, Ted struggled to get his line out without stuttering, “Th-Thus from my lips, by then, my sin is purged.”

His eyes didn’t leave hers for even the slightest millisecond of time and his grip around her just tightened; until the director and everyone else in the class clapped. “That was absolutely stunning.” The director calls out. Almost instantly upon realization that they weren’t alone, they quickly tore apart from each other- she was blushing madly, while Ted just wore a look of confusion.

—🩵—🩵—

It was a few hours after practice and most of the staff went home, while she sat on the stage, silently going over her lines. She was reading through every detail, looking for every emotion. Lying back, she laid the script over her face, mind still flying from the previous events of the day. Suddenly, she heard the sound of footsteps and a soft shift of air around her as whoever it was sat beside her.

“Ted…” She grumbles, without even moving the script from her face. She knew it was him- of course she did, she hates him. His scent filled her nostrils and tempted to distract her.

“(Y/N)…” His voice is gentle; hearing him say her name like that was a surprise. Reaching up, he gently pulls the script away from her face. When her pretty eyes meet his, he smiles softly and just watches her for a moment. “Can we talk?”

“Hmph.” She lets out a soft puff of air and crosses her arms.

“(Y/N).” His voice is still gentle, but this time it takes on a warning tone. She looks back up at him through her lashes and sighs. Rolling her eyes, she moved to sit. “Now that you’re situated… Why do you hate me?”

“Can we just go over our lines, please?” Her eyes are silently pleading, but he just slowly nods with a soft sigh of succession.

“Where do you wanna start-“ He’s quickly cut off as she basically launches at him, crashing their lips together in a heated kiss. His mind is telling him to pull away, but everything else is telling him to pull her closer. His hands grip her hips, tight enough to leave bruises and he helps her climb into his lap. Pulling away, he looks up at her with a small smirk, “If you wanted me that bad you just needed to tell me.” He teased gently.

“If you want me at all, you’ll shut the fuck up.” She growls lowly. Raising a brow at her, he reaches behind her and places a firm slap on her rear.

“You better check your attitude with me, Sweetheart.” A squeak left her lips when he spanked her and she jumped, making her grind forward against him. Ted bit back a groan and closed his eyes. “Princess…”

The warmth in his voice and the tempting softness in his eyes made her melt right there in his lap. She was careful and hesitant with each movement she made. Exploring the new territory was terrifying, but it felt so… Right. Her lips traced along his neck, kissing and sucking every exposed inch of skin she could reach. Her canines would occasionally scrape over a patch of skin and her tongue would dart out to soothe it.

“You feel so good… Being such a good girl for me.” Ted mumbled, eyes closed and simply enjoying her sweet touches.

“You taste so good, Teddy.” She mumbles against his skin, tongue flicking out over his pulse point. “Makes me angry how good you feel.” Letting out a deep, breathy chuckle, he pries her away from him and lays her back on the stage.

“I know, Honey, I know…” He coos, pulling her shorts down her legs. His eyes settled on the wet patch on her panties, light hitting it and making it glisten in the most tantalizing way. His mouth watered at the sight. “Why don’t you let me make you feel good? Hmm? I bet you taste as beautiful as you look.” A high pitched whine leaves her lips and she grabs for him to try and pull him close again, but he denies her, instead moving his hands down her thighs and massaging the skin there. His thumbs kneaded her flesh, making her relax for him.

“There ya go, babes… That feel good?” He hums, hands creeping just slightly higher. A soft moan of relief leaves her lips.

“Yessss…” She hisses out softly, eyes fluttering shut.

“You seem to be carrying quite a bit of tension here…” He says smoothly as his hands move to the inside of her thighs and slowly creep higher. “But I think most of your tension is held here.” His fingertips brushing against the wet spot on her panties made her body jolt and a mewl sound around them, the sound bouncing off of the walls.

“Ted.” She whimpers, making him chuckle.

“Oh yeah, you’ve got so much tension… Right here.” As he finished his sentence, he gently pressed his thumb to her clit, making her back arch away from the stage and up towards him.

“Teddy!” She cries out in a lewd beg, hips moving against his hand in a desperate attempt to gain more friction. His thumb just continued to move in slow circles around her throbbing bud, making her cunt clench around nothing.

“What’s wrong, Hon? Hmm?” He teased, watching as her wetness continued to soak through her panties until she was dripping on the stage floor.

“I- I can’t- ‘S too much!” She cries out, nails digging into the skin of his forearm that she held onto for dear life. The confidence in his eyes flared and changed to a much darker expression, pupils blown wide with lust.

“Aww, does it feel too good, Pumpkin? Can’t handle feeling so good?” He mocked her in the most condescending way, but it made a whimper leave her lips as her eyes flashed open and met his. “You’re going to lay there and take it like the filthy slut you are.” He growls lowly, free hand slapping the outside of her thigh hard enough to leave a hand print, but her squeal morphed with a lewd moan of desperation.

“Yes Teddy… I- I can take- take it.” She stuttered out, legs shaking. His degrading hit her body like a truck, making her head go fuzzy. Ted nearly lost it when he saw the pure submissive state that she had slipped into, her eyes staring up at him innocently.

“Look at you, Princess…” He mumbles, pushing her panties aside and slipping his middle finger into her. Her breath caught in her throat and her lips parted in a silent moan. Her eyes locked on his as he curled his finger upwards to hit her most sensitive spot. “So fucking pretty.”

“Ted-“ She tries to speak, but he quickly shushes her. He slipped his ring finger into her as well and placed his free hand on her abdomen, very gently adding pressure. The feeling intensified for her and she cried out a sob, body shaking.

“You know I won’t let anyone else touch you now.” He mumbles, working his fingers faster and harder. “You’re mine now. Mine to degrade, mine to praise, mine to fuck… Mine to protect.” As the words continued to fall from his lips, her chest swelled with a new, overwhelming, uncertain emotion. Her cunt tightened, just as her chest did when she realized what emotion he was evoking in her.

“Ted I-“ He’s quick to cut her off.

“No, Shhh… Trust me, (Y/N)… Let me make you feel good, then you’re free to go back to hating me.” He speaks softly, eyes watching her face, rather than her body.

“No, Ted I want you.” She whimpers softly, her voice so soft and so weak. She sounded so innocent. “Please.” A warm smile broke out across his lips and he nodded, pulling his fingers from her and popping them in his mouth. A low groan rumbled through him, and he closed his eyes to savor her taste. When he pulled his finger free from his mouth.

“So fucking sweet.” He growls, literally ripping her panties from her body. “Because of course, the world’s biggest brat has to have the sweetest little pussy I’ve ever tasted.” He unbuckled his belt and yanked it off, folding it in half. Ted used the folded leather as a riding crop, slapping the outside of her thigh. “Spread ‘em, Cupcake.”

A smirk crossed her lips at the opportunity so clearly in front of her. Shaking her head, she huffed out one simple word, “No.” Ted grabbed her ankles and yanked her towards him. Giggling wildly, she wrapped her legs around his waist.

“Mmh, maybe I just won’t let you cum…” She whined at the idea, pouting and smacking his arm, making him use his free hand to hold hers down. “Maybe I’ll just stuff you with my cum and plug you up. Let you throb around a silly toy instead of me.”

“Teddy!” She basically begs, tears of frustration welling up in the corners of her eyes. He let out a warm, hearty laugh at her response and slowly dragged the belt across her abdomen, using it to brush her shirt slightly upwards.

“Aww, poor Pup wants me to breed her?” He asks, raising a brow as his free hand carefully massages her hip. She quickly nodded her head and her hands made a little grabby motion for him, a high pitched whine leaving her lips.

“You’re so precious, Honey.” He hums, undoing the button on his slacks and pushing them down -along with his boxers- just enough for his cock to spring free. Biting her lip, she watched as precum dripped from the tip and fell onto her thigh. Her eyes slowly went up his body to settle on his, boring into his soul.

“I wanna taste you, Theo.” She fluttered her lashes at him in the prettiest, most sweet and innocent way she could.

“As tempting as that sounds, I don’t think you deserve that treat today, Puppy.” He hums, gripping her legs and placing them over his shoulders and leaning so close to her that his lips brushed against hers and he whispered, “You only get what I chose to give you.”

The second that he finished his sentence, he buried himself to the hilt. A cry tore from her throat as her back tried to arch, but couldn’t as he pressed further forward, basically bending her in half. Her hands flew to his back and her nails bit into the fabric, nearly tearing the threads apart piece by piece.

“I’m gonna fill you up until your pretty little body can’t hold anymore.” He growls lowly, biting her lower lip. His words made her cunt tighten around him in an attempt to draw him in even closer. Drawing his hips back slowly, she drew in a sharp gasp when his hips lurched forwards, burying himself inside of her once more.

“Teddddyyy nnngh!” She chokes out, body trembling beneath his and he chuckles darkly, mouth attaching to her.

“What’s wrong, Cupcake? Can you not take it?” He mocked, cooing in her ear as he quickened his pace, fucking into her harshly and caging her in with his arms beside her head. She wildly shook her head, grappling for him with her nails nearly shredding the fabric of his shirt.

“P-please- ta- Ahh~ take it off.” She stutters out, gripping over little moans and whines. Ted found it impossible to resist her pleas when they sounded just so pretty. He kept his eyes on her face as he felt her nails dragging down his back.

“That feel better, Hon?” He mumbles and she buried her face in his neck.

“Yessss…” She hissed, teeth biting into the skin of his neck. “Oh God, Theo…”

“If I’d have known that you’d stop being such a fucking brat, I would’ve fucked you sooner.” He growls, sharply slapping the outside of her thigh as he changed the angle of his hips, making her let out a shaky sob. Tears fell down her cheeks as her vision clouded. Ted smirked as he hummed, watching the way her body morphed and changed position with every thrust.

The way he filled her so full, made her mind fuzzy and her thoughts fade away. Her cunt tightened around him as she threatened to fall over the edge, “Please Ted!”

“I dunno, Pumpkin. Do you think you deserve it?” He asks, halting in his movements, making her so frustrated she nearly screamed.

“Please, please, please, I’ll be so good, I swear. I’ll be so so so good for you Theo, please.” She begged and pleaded, tears streaming down her cheeks.

“Gimme a kiss then, cutie.” Before his sentence was even complete, she launched herself forward, capturing his lips on hers. While she was distracted, he slipped his hand between the two of them, thumb massaging quick circles on her pretty little bud, picking his thrusts back up. His ministrations, made her let out a squeak against his lips as the band in her belly stretches so tightly that it could break at any second.

“Go ahead, Honey. Cum for me and I’ll fill you up. How’s that sound? Want me to fill you up? Get you all round with my babies?” His words were all that she needed, her world exploding into stars and butterflies as her orgasm hits her like a comet hits the earth, shattering her every nerve. Ted watched as her mouth formed a perfect ‘o’ and her eyebrows pinched together. He held eye contact with her the entire time, reminding her to breathe as she rides off the effects. “There ya go, there it is. You alright, Sweetie?”

Her breathing began to steady as overstimulation kicked in, “‘M good, Teddy… I wan’ it.” She mumbles as he helped her move her legs from his shoulders to around his waist. His thumbs gently massaged her hips as he slowly picked his thrusts back up.

“I know, honey… Shh, it’s okay, I’ve got ya.” He speaks calmly, watching her as she starts to come back to attention. “There ya are… Welcome back to reality, Sweetheart.” He chuckles softly, giving her a goofy smile. A giggle punctuated by a soft moan leaves her lips and she smiles up at him, her own hands gripping his biceps and rolling her thumbs over his skin.

A soft groan leaves him and he lets his head fall to her chest as he struggles to hold it together. “My God, you’re so fucking tight. Gonna squeeze the life outta me.” He grumbles, placing gentle kisses over her chest as he lazily rolls his hips against hers. Her fingers gently card through his hair as she mumbles her own praises to him.

“You feel so good, Ted. Ya’ make me feel s’ good.” She hums, locking her legs around his waist as he starts to lose his pace. Lifting his head with the little energy he has left he gives her a questioning look.

“You sure you don’t-“ But she was quick to cut him off.

“Cum for me.” She whispers in his ear, placing a careful, open mouthed kiss on his neck. Right when she spoke, her pussy clamped down on him, making his eyes roll back in his head as his hips stutter and he bottoms out inside of her.

“Mmh, fuck…” He growls, filling her to the brim. “So good for me… Takin’ it so fuckin’ well.” His head falls to her chest and he mumbles something into her shirt. Whatever he said made him blush, the tips of his ears going red. She gently cups his jawline and lifts his head to look at her.

“What did you say, Theo?” She asks gently, thumb running across his lip. He paused and just stared at her for a moment, silence floating between them.

“I can’t believe you never realized how in love with you I am.”

#ted nivision smut #ted nivison x reader #ted nivison imagine #ted nivison fluff

215 notes · View notes

diamond-champagne · 4 months ago

Text

6. I Hurt You

Paige Bueckers x Azzi Fudd

Warnings: None that I know of :)

Feed back is always welcome! Besties, thank you for the support <3

Shoutout to @makethemhoesmad for getting me through this chapter.

It takes Paige over an hour to clean up the broken glass. Her eyes blur with tears too often for her to make any real progress. She gets it done though; sighing as she drops the last of the paper towel and glass into the trash. The blonde settles back on the couch and begins to scroll through her social media when she gets a text.

Babe: How was your night, Ma?

The text brings a smile to Paige’s face as she remembers their interaction from earlier in the night.

Paige stands at the bar; waiting for the bartender. She’s happy to be celebrating with the team. She also feels looser tonight than she has in a while. Then again, that could be the three tequila shots making their way through her system. Paige is drumming her fingers against the bar when abruptly, a strong body is pressed against her back. Alarmed, the blonde girl turns around, ready to snap when she hears a deep voice say “Sorry, Ma. People don’t know how to say excuse me.”

The voice stops Paige in her tracks as she gazes at the person before her. The man has a tall and muscat build. His caramel skin is accompanied by green eyes and a perfect smile. The icing on the cake is that the man’s right arm is covered in tattoos. He’s handsome, Paige thinks as she continues to check him out. She doesn’t know how long she’s been doing so when a deep chuckle pulls her back to reality. The blonde’s face turns red in embarrassment as she avoids eye contact.

“No need to be embarrassed, Ma. A pretty girl like you can stare at me all day” the man says while taking a slight step away from the blonde. She feels her face get hot at the compliment.

“Bold of you to assume I was embarrassed,” Paige quips. “Maybe I was just upset that you bumped into me.” The man lets out another deep chuckle. “My bad, pretty. I promise I didn’t mean to.” He smiles at her. “It’s all good, babe.” Paige teases.

“Babe?” The man questions. “Well,” Paige starts, “You’ve called me everything but my name so I thought it was only fair.” The man nods in agreement before speaking again. “So what is your name, pretty?” He’s still smiling at her.

“Paige, and yours?”

“Cameron, but all my friends call me Cam”

“And we’re friends now?” Paige smirks.

“Yeah, Ma,” Cam answers, “Yeah, we are.” His smile is sincere and Paige begins to enjoy his company.

“Well, babe, who are you here with?” Paige asks. The nickname rolls off her tongue easily as she converses with the taller man. “I’m on the football team so I’m here with my teammates,” Cam says as he nods his head in the direction of the UConn football team. “What about you?”

“I’m on the basketball team, so I am also here with my teammates.” Paige answers. Cam nods in acknowledgement. He starts to respond but the volume in Ted’s increases drastically as they change the music playing, making it difficult for Paige to hear. The football player realizes and then proceeds to grab her waist to pull her closer to him. He leans down to talk in the basketball player's ear. “So Ma, can I get your number?” He asked. Paige braces her hands on his shoulder so she can talk in his ear “Yeah, give me your phone.”

The two switch phones so that they can put in their respective phone numbers. Both athletes take selfies for their contact picture which consists of silly faces and peace signs before returning their phones. Cameron leans down one more time to talk in Paige’s ear “Be safe, Ma. I hope to see you soon.” Paige responds “Bye, babe.” before rejoining her friends at the table

It’s with a smile that Paige responds to this text.

Ma: It didn’t end too well but I had fun.

Babe: Do you want to talk about it?

Ma: Not right now

Babe: What about over breakfast tomorrow?

Ma: Bet

That conversation is exactly how the athletes ended up getting breakfast at a small diner right off campus. They’re sitting in a booth laughing about a tik tok that they both found funny while the waitress arrives at the table with their food. The pair immediately begin to dig in before Cam changes the subject.

“So Ma, what happened last night?”

Paige drops her fork and lets out a sigh at the thought of her fight with Azzi. The situation left her tired and frustrated but all she wanted was for someone to listen. So, Paige told Cam everything. She told him how they were best friends that often woke up together, how she was in love with Azzi and her feelings weren’t returned, how the younger girl had a girlfriend, and lastly, how they argued last night. By the end of her long and detailed explanation, Paige had a steady stream of tears rolling down her cheeks. Cam reached out to grab the blonde’s hand from across the table; running his thumb over the back of it soothingly.

“I’m sorry, Ma. You didn’t deserve that.” Cam says “But if it’s causing you this much pain, don’t you think you should move on?” Paige shakes her head in agreement. “I know but I can’t because she’s still my best friend. She’s still half of me.”

“Your other half is killing all of you.”

“I’d rather have a piece of her than none of her, if I’m being honest.” Paige admits for the first time out loud. She sounds pathetic to her own ears.

“Why, Ma?” Cam pushes. He can’t understand why the girl in front of him is so adamant on keeping this relationship especially when she knows she deserves better.

“I went through everything by myself before I met her. I wiped my own tears and faced all my fears by myself; but when I met Azzi, everything changed. We talked all day everyday. She was there for everything after that. All my highs and all my lows.” Paige lets out a tearful laugh. “I can’t go back to how things were before her. She’s too embedded in my life now. We’re best friends that spend holidays and vacations together, go to school together, and play the same sport. All I know is Azzi.” Paige finishes.

Cameron just nods his head in understanding before speaking. “What about your teammates? Surely you could talk to them?”

“I’m sure they have some inkling. It’s hard to not notice things when you spend so much time together. I wouldn’t tell them everything though. It’s easier to keep the peace if I don’t.” Paige answers honestly. She knows she confided in Nika about some things but she wouldn’t tell the team about everything. They’re already so messy.

“Sure, it’ll keep the peace, but whose would it keep?” Cam counters. Paige just shrugs in response. The football player can sense that the blonde doesn’t want to talk about this anymore so he redirects her attention to something less heavy.

“Are you going to eat those, Ma?” The green-eyed boy points to her chocolate chip pancakes. Paige lets out a laugh before moving her arm to guard her plate of food. “Yes, babe, I’m going to eat these.” She teases.

The heaviness of the conversation dissipated from the air. The two continue their meal in laughter while getting to know each other. In the end, Paige feels like she’s made a new friend.

Before either one could realize it, it’s almost time for the two to part ways. They’re sitting in the football player’s car outside of Paige’s apartment talking before they finally depart. The only other noise filling the car besides their voices, is the rain hitting the window.

“Listen Ma, call me if you need anything.”

“We just met yesterday, why would I call you?” Paige asks with a smile on her face.

“Because we’re friends and friends call each other.” Cam counters.

“And friends call each other Ma and Babe, too?” Paige teases. The nicknames are fun to her.

“We do,” The football player confirms before continuing. “I’m Babe and you’re Ma and we talk to each other.

The basketball player shakes her head before repeating the words sincerely. “I’m Ma and you’re babe, and we talk to each other.”

Paige and Cam share a hug before she gets ready to leave the car. Despite the pair being in front of Paige’s door, the football player insists that she take his jacket so that she doesn’t get wet. It's a small gesture but it brightens Paige’s day to know she’s being considered.

Later, as Paige thinks about the day, she’s happy to know that she has another person in her corner.

She couldn’t have Azzi but maybe she wouldn’t be alone either.

Azzi woke up that morning feeling terrible. The booze creates a deep, sinking ache in her head while the guilt does the same thing to her heart. The curly-haired girl lets out a groan and attempts to sit up in her bed. It’s a weak effort but it’s all Azzi can manage right now. Someone must be playing a cruel joke on her though because there’s a soft knock on her front door. Azzi struggles to get out of bed but when she opens the door, she’s met with Carol who just happens to have water and headache medicine.

The brown-eyed girl welcomes her friend into her apartment with the memories of last night still replaying in her head. While Azzi and Carol are very close, the brown-eyed girl knows that this will be a tense conversation.

The girls wordlessly settle into the living room. Carol watches as her friend takes the medicine given while she chugs half of her water before speaking.

“You’re being unfair” Caroline states.

“I know”

“You need to apologize.”

“I did.” Azzi sighs before continuing. “She doesn’t want anything to do with me.”

“Would you?” Caroline asks. The question shocks Azzi.

“Excuse me?” she exclaims slightly offended.

“Think about it,” Caroline starts, “You treated her like a girlfriend before ghosting her when you actually got a girlfriend. You get jealous when she’s with someone else but she asked you if you had feelings for her and you walked away. Plus, you embarrassed her at the bar yesterday.” Caroline finishes bluntly. It’s the truth and she knows Azzi needs to hear it.

“I was jealous last night-” Caroline cuts her off. Azzi is getting very tired of people doing that.

“You don't get to be jealous. Not this time.”

“I know.”

“Do you love her? It’s a fair question but the brown-eyed girl isn’t quite sure of the answer. “I don’t know.”

“Paige deserves to be with someone who knows. If you can’t give her that, then she should be able to find someone who can.”

“What if I do love her?” Azzi asks.

“Then you fight for her.” Carol answers.

“And if I don’t?” Azzi counters.

“Then you watch her get the love that she deserves from someone else.”

“I don’t want to see her with anyone else,” Azzi starts. “I know it’s selfish but I don’t.”

Caroline sighs in response. She doesn’t understand how her teammate can’t see what’s in front of her.

“You’re being unfair.” Caroline repeats.

“I know.”

“You need to apologize.”

“I know.”

PREVIOUS | NEXT

#azzi fudd #paige bueckers #paige x azzi #uconn wbb #pazzi #paige bueckers x azzi fudd #YOU

144 notes · View notes

zayne-li · 2 months ago

Text

Zayne and Siming

First of all, if you’re unfamiliar with the lore of Love and Deepspace, and don’t want to be majorly spoiled for just about everything (mainly Zayne’s lore), then I suggest you skip for now until you learn more. Unless you don’t care about spoilers, then go ahead.

I think that to all of us, so far, other than Sylus(who can blame him, he’s new), Zayne is the most confusing character to the Western audience. Rafayel tells us he’s a mermaid every other sentence, and Xavier has more than a few clues pointing to the fact that he’s a time traveler from another planet and possibly immortal?

Zayne’s main thing that seems to be talked about frequently in his cards and events are more so things related to Gods, fate, and fortune telling. And for me, for a while, this didn’t make a ton of sense to me, because I felt like I didn’t really have anything super specific to compare it to, but clearly he’s not just based off of anything random, you’re meant to recognize him as some specific God of Fate/reader of fate. And then Infold released this video when they released Master of Fates, and I realized that in Chinese, the myth was called Da Siming, which is a real Chinese god. So I got to work. Welcome to my Ted Talk on why Zayne’s entire story, mainly focusing on his main story counterpart, is still Siming in modern day Linkon City.

Disclaimer: I am no Chinese mythology expert, this is simply what I’ve learned from Google and what that video Infold released tells us.

Who is Siming?

Siming is a Chinese deity or deified functionary of that title(meaning this title can pass from person to person) who makes fine adjustments to human fate (meaning you can pray to him for things as small as a chest cold etc)

He is referred to in Chinese as almost a secretary, his job in allocating human lifespans is almost a bureaucratic one. Think a guy in an insurance office.

Siming's main duty/power is the balancing of yin and yang, specifically in regards to human health/lifespans. He has the power to either shorten or lengthen life essentially as he sees fit (as long as it doesn't fuck things up too badly).

There can be more than one Siming at a time, who take on slightly different roles. Such as Da Siming(Greater Siming) acting as a Priest of Death, and a Shao Siming(Lesser Siming) acting as a Priest of Birth (this is just an example taken from a movie)

other titles (aside from Master of Fate) include Director of Allotted Life Spans, and Director of Destinies

While the 'job' of Siming can be passed down to multiple different people, the length of time they end up serving as Siming can result in different qualifying titles being added to them. 'Da Siming' (which is the one Infold told the story of when they released Shifu in that video apparently no one watched) would be more revered. "Da" means big, or greater, meaning he held that title for a great period of time. Bitch was tenured.

The 3 deathbringers

Essentially 3 spirits who take residence in the 3 energy centers of the human body. (head, chest, abdomen. probably only the chest would be relevant to us, given that Zayne is a cardiac surgeon)

these spirits enter the human body at birth, and seek to hasten the death of their hosts.

Siming controls the process of these deathbringers killing their hosts, he may or may not permit it.

to regulate this process, Siming relies on reports given to him by the deathbringers, which are brought to him on specific dates. Based on what he learns he may or may not use that information (and possibly other information) to decide whether or not to shorten or lengthen that specific persons lifespan.

This bitch is not making sweeping decisions, he's looking at every individual person.

humans are believed to have various things available to alter the judgment of Siming regarding their fates, such as interfering with the reporting process, praying to Siming or his superiors, or following treatment from a doctor to improve the yin-yang balance, and thus extend their lifespan.

Other things:

There's a story about an ancient man who finds a skull on the ground, and mourns the fact that this person never had a proper burial. He lays down on the skull and uses it as a pillow, then has a dream where the skull comes to him and tells him about the tranquility and happiness found in death. The man tells the skull that he could petition Siming to bring him back to life, and then he would be able to return to his family. The skull denies he would want that, asking rhetorically to the man, 'why would anyone in such a peaceful and happy place as death ever want to return to the suffering of living?'

Where do we see these elements pop up in Zayne’s story?

Now, we already know that at the very least Zayne’s Master of Fate myth is heavily based on this deity, and you can see some elements of Siming in Foreseer as well. Foreseer most likely takes place in the far future from Master of Fates given that he resides on Philos, and we know that Philos is the planet humanity started inhabiting only after Earth was destroyed. Philos is also where both Xavier and Sylus are from. This is no Xavier lore post, but if you know anything about his lore, you know that he’s come back in time from the future. There will be a section on Foreseer below, but for now I want to focus on why I believe Zayne is still Siming in present day Linkon City.

The story of the man and the skull immediately brought me back to the World Underneath: Snowy Stairs, where Carter is actively trying to recruit Zayne to Xander Sciences for the purpose of bringing people back from the dead.

Snowy Stairs

First, we see Carter come across (well he’s kind of stalking him actually) Zayne who is consoling a child about the death of their dog, Pilot. The child is asking him to do something to save the dog, and Zayne simply tells him that he’s already dead, while Carter pulls out a Protocore and tells the child that he can bring the dog back to life with it.

Carter and Zayne then have a mostly one sided conversation about the morals and ethics of using Protocores to bring people and animals back to life. Carter asks Zayne if the natural law is an unshakable moral boundary, or if it’s a comfort people use.

I see two things here: As Siming, the ability for humans to bring themselves back to life despite the natural law would be a great disruption to the balance of fate, or yin and yang, which would explain why Zayne is so against this process, even though he himself was clearly interested in it at one point for the sole and selfish reason of keeping MC from dying. It seems to me that although Zayne is Siming, MC has some sort of destined death associated with her that is outside of his jurisdiction. Possibly because he has shirked his duties in order to keep her safe in the past (shielding her with umbrellas instead of killing her like he was supposed to as the Master of Fates.)

Carter then tells Zayne of a patient who is on the verge of death and asks him to come take a look and help them at Xander Sciences. Zayne does not appear, and though they seemingly have all the tools to save the man, they still fail. Is it maybe because as Siming, Zayne truly does alone have the power to control life and death?

Carter then shouts as Zayne gets up to leave: “Our job is to save people. If we can control life and death, why shouldn’t we?!” Which is another clear reference to the job of Siming and the delicate balance he maintains.

Side note, something else they’re referring to in this part is possibly this procedure of bringing life back has something to do with the creation of Wanderers? Unsure.

Then, Zayne oversees a couple essentially praying to have their son back. Siming controls life and death, and may respond to prayers if he so chooses to. He doesn’t bring the man back to life, but instead cleans the body so that the parents may properly say goodbye to their son.

In this anecdote what we learn is that Zayne alone is seen as capable of controlling life and death, and it is implied that in whatever research he did on this subject, he found a solution. One that he rejects, possibly because it is a process that can and will result in creating Abominations, as seen in the Dawnbreaker anecdote. Wanderers/Abominations may be like the undead, resulting in these people not finding the proper peace in death.

Other main story things

Mainly what I’m seeing in main story/event stories is that we are talking about Siming a lot with our present day Zayne, in terms of Gods of fate, and etc(Spceifically I’m thinking about the silk balls event, where that was the main focus of the conversation with him).

Foreseer/Master of Fates

Like I said, I don’t want to go into too much detail on Foreseer, but the fact that he has the power to see into Fate, and has superiors (Astra) tells me that he at least has some of the same powers as he did when he was the Master of Fates. Master of Fates seems to be a more peaceful era of his life as Siming, where I am assuming that all of the slips and scrolls MC is helping him record are indeed related to his ‘reporting’ as Siming, going back to the idea that Siming is more or less a sort of secretary, a record keeper. I believe he fell out of favor with the Gods when he chose to protect MC instead of killing her as he was told by either one of his deathbringers, or one of his superiors(I’m inclined to think it’s the latter).

I believe that after the moment when he chooses to protect MC rather than kill her as he said he would, he went on the run. We later find him as Dr. Zayne, and something happens in the story(we don't know yet) which results in him becoming the Foreseer.

Foreseer was supposed to let her die as well, or possibly never even meet her, but he instead chooses to finally accept the consequences of his actions as Master of Fates and possibly Dr. Zayne and instead sacrifices himself so that she can live as a sort of. Equal exchange.

That's uh… that's all I got right now! Will possibly add more to this post later we shall see. Basically I feel like I’m just seeing a lot of parallels between all of Zayne’s major character beats/themes and this specific Chinese deity, and by the Rafayel Precedent(telling us he’s a mermaid and then turning out to be a mermaid), I would not be surprised at all if Dr. Zayne in the main story ends up just being Siming.

#lads zayne #love and deepspace #zayne #lnds zayne #zayne love and deepspace #this took forever and tbh i could probably add more but this post is already so long #welcome to my brainrot #its just all zayne all the time #247 folks

118 notes · View notes

herejusttosufferalong · 4 months ago

Note

Oooooook for science and for my own sanity at this point I needed my partner perspective/POV on L&N (and a bit of 🐜 too). It was only supposed to be a quick conversation with me showing him a few videos and call it a night buuuuut we actually did a bit of a dive armed with a lot of cocktails and appetizers (ladies this restaurant can welcome our best friends/partners/husbands - he switched from being totally uninterested by my rambling to fully dissect Luke’s body language at the end 😂)

Anywayyyyy - We are both a bit drunk but here goes nothing:

- London nterviews (me) : see??!!? Not only her space is his space but they flirted like there is no tomorrow they are driving me crazy

- London interviews (him): i don’t sense any feelings but It’s clearly giving “you are my best friend but I want to see your panties and fuck you right seven days a week” for him. Her? Idk she seems to have friend zoned him

———

- Italy (me) : this is the weirdest stop of this tour. Weird vibes all along right? I don’t get it he couldn’t stop laughing uncomfortably?

- Italy (him): she clocked him about something I fear. He clearly fucked up before the day started or the day before and she is showing him she is not to be played at. And it worked imo. That girl has this man at her feet

- Italy (me): so he is in love with her at this point?

- Italy (him) : now that I am seeing more interviews I think he has been in love for a long time but play the friend card until she gives him any indication she wants more. Idk about her though she is harder to read

————

- Brazil (him) : ok they fucked. Next.

(Me dying here 😭😂😂😂😂)

- Brazil (me): how do you know??!

- Brazil (him): they were dancing around and were quite shameless at it and the following day? Both have the “properly fucked” glow.

————

- Ireland (me) : married couple behavior here. What in the “you are only my best friend but I am overly emotional about you meeting my family” is this non sense?

- Ireland (him): oh I can finally see what you are seeing about her I agree she looks down bad here. Don’t know what happened but they both seem at the same page now.

————

I showed him the pictures (QG photos, papgate etc) and he said “who is this? His sister?” Not gonna lie it almost took me out 😂😂😂😂😂 when I said it’s his actual girlfriend he went “meh i this girl is his fuck buddy he is clearly not interested in giving here the girlfriend treatment in anything you showed me. He is biding his time until the girl he actually wants to be his GF gives him the time of day”.

So for him, he has been harboring romantic feelings for Nic for a long time (and it’s more apparent the more time passed) and he is playing the waiting game. And for him Nic was harder to read but at the end of tour as we all agree something changed and the mask slipped and she is clearly in love too. Although I don’t think they crossed the lines he is very vocal on the fact they crossed the line in Brazil 🫠

Thank you for participating to my Ted talk haha (will do the same with my gay best friend soon - so we can have more insights).

There is a consensus among the men 👀

#love this #this is all opinion #theories

110 notes · View notes

omelepun · 3 months ago

Note

Do you have any more kabumisu headcanons? I loved the last one you wrote, mind sharing more?

Sure!!! Thank you for asking anon!! These are mostly post-canon, welcome to my little deranged mind..

- Kabru likes it when Mithrun plays with his hair and run his hand through his curls because it reminds him of how his mother used to do it, its one of the things he remembers about her..

- Kabru calls him “captain” whenever he wants something, like *bats long and luscious eyelashes at you” my captain…

- Kabru’s charm grows with age so by the time he reaches 45 and starts aging like fine wine, people of the kingdom goes even more crazy for him. Mithrun, of course, loves him all the same but he gets jealous because that is his old man and he’s not planning on sharing. So he gets possessive (past self showing through) in really sly ways, Kabru in a hurry and forgets to button his shirt? He’s got his husband to do it for him (no one except for him is allowed to see his beautiful chest). Kabru complaining about shaving every morning because he thinks he’s unattractive if he doesn’t? His husband likes him hairy 😈…

- Mithrun’s restaurant is literally known as the prime minister restaurant because 9 times out of 10 you will find him in his very own designated spot at the back of the kitchen (where he can watch his husband work)

- During their dancing-around-each-other and codependent homoerotic friendship phase, oftentimes they had to be apart because Kabru had to travel for work since the kingdom was still in its infancy, so they stay in touch through letters. Mithrun, despite his perpetually deadpan expression, is very expressive (romantic even) in letters. So most of the time his letters consisted of:

“Kabru, today i got out of bed on my own”,

“Kabru, today i wanted to drink jasmine tea”,

“Kabru, must the sky be so blue and the sea so clear? I sleep at day and wake at night to stop thinking about you whenever i look at them”,

“Kabru, fleki let me tried her blunt yesterday”

- Basically he rizzed Kabru up through letters…yeah and Kabru falls for it, HARD. And he discovered a new hobby that is flower pressing, so he included his works in the letters.

- Bonus, a long long time passed and historians discovered their letters (very well kept), studied them and were like: “wow… they were REALLY good buddies huh” LOL shoots them with the gay erasure beam of historians!!

Thank you for coming to my ted talk *hops on a cloud and fly away*

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #mithrun #kabru of utaya #kabumisu #mithrun of the house of kerensil #headcanon

113 notes · View notes

antariies · 9 months ago

Text

how to build a chair........... director's cut ∠( ᐛ 」∠)__ this is about to be a very long very self-indulgent post where i just talk about my own writing. i also doodled on all the pages i think it makes the whole thing more fun to go thru. welcome to my ted talk

SIKE before i begin. credit where credit is due, this post was the start of it all. it changed my brain chemistry my jaw was dropped i was in awe i was obsessed and before i even finished it i knew that i would eventually have to make something similar for the commander or else i would be cursed to think about it for the rest of my life. and i Was cursed for like two years every day i would just be like........ is today the day i sit down and draft the commander chair fic of my dreams....... maybe tomorrow......

and then i got accepted as a writer for the gw2 zine ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ the chair idea was actually my backup option in case my first idea didn't pan out, and thank god it didn't, bc this one worked so much better. (still working on my initial idea, just turning it into a full fic! it was wayyy too long to be a zine submission.)

this is the chair i used. i downloaded the assembly instructions and tried out a bunch of different free pdf editors until i found one i liked, which ended up being sedja. if anyone's interested in doing something like this, i recommend printing out the pdf and writing directly on it! it was a lot easier for me to just figure out everything on paper first and then digitalize it after :P here's a picture of my physical copy

okay actually getting into it for real this time !!!!!

1. yeah i could've just erased the ikea logo and left a blank space but then i realized i could turn it into an in-universe joke. and then i ran with it.

2. i ripped this straight from the product description on the website. thanks ikea

3. i'm not sure if anyone went and looked it up, but it's a real item code!

hehe :3c

4. if your commander willingly goes to therapy i'm happy for them but TO ME? you'd have to drag the commander kicking and screaming. it's not that they don't know that something is wrong with them, they know, and they know YOU know. you're just never supposed to talk about it. they don't look at their own psych eval results bc that's none of their business.

5. i normally avoid specifying the commander's race when i write them bc i enjoy the challenge, but for the zine i was assigned to write about a norn commander! as a human main i was uhhhh very ill-equipped. but that just meant i had to study up on my norn lore (•̀ᴗ•́)و i spent hours on the wiki, then went around interviewing norn mains for their opinions, which was great fun :D it all helped me narrow the focus of my piece: joining the war on commander objectification on the side of commander objectification (ㅅ´ ˘ `)♡ and no one self-aggrandizes quite like the norn commander!

and to balance that i knew my narrator had to be patronizing as shitttt. they've clearly been following the commander since the beginning and seem to know a lot of intimate details about their life, despite not thinking very highly of them. wonder who that could be :3c

6. i can't stop making references. so the original part number is actually #122620 in the manual but i've changed it here (and on the previous page!) to #082812, as in 08/28/12, the date gw2 was released! no real reason for it, @dalennaugw suggested it for funsies and i liked it. if you're my pal and i show you a wip and you have a cool idea for it, chances are i Will put that shit in. hi dale if you're reading this

7. another thing about me. i loveeee repetition. here the word "over" is repeated four times to match the picture. honestly a lot of the creative process for this piece was just staring at the pages and figuring out how to tie the pictures to the commander in ways that weren't extremely corny or trite. idk why i enjoy writing like this when i could be frolicking in the beautiful prosaic meadows of a word doc instead but. it's like i see a tiny little restrictive box and i'm like OH BOY can't wait to think inside of that thing!!! i like when the format matters just as much as the content and in some cases informs the content. am i making any sense here. well all you need to know is that i'm a virgo and my favorite book is house of leaves

7. aw fuck just realized i wrote 7 twice. whatever i'm not changing it this is 7 part two now. the theme of my piece is glory, what it means to the norn commander, and how far they're willing to go for it.

8. does norn culture place emphasis on seeking individual glory Yes are norn also very community-oriented Also Yes. i think it's common to see norn kids napping together in a big pile, usually after they've worn themselves out playing games outside. it makes sense practically (apes together warm) and socially (pack bonding good) but that's just my hc. growing up i used to share a bed with my cousins all the time so it's normal to me.

a young, naive not-yet-commander, with no real combat experience, has no point of reference to compare a "blaze of glory" to. but the way everyone talks about it, it must be a good thing. a wonderful thing. a reward fit for a life well-fought and a legend hard-earned. so they imagine it must feel like falling asleep surrounded by the people they love, who love them in turn.

9. .........i was playing a lot of ace attorney when i wrote this page. i wish i was joking 👍🏼

10. ohhh shit the truth come OUT this whole chair thing was all a ploy just so i could write about the departing. again.

will i ever stop thinking about her. reply hazy, try again later.

11. out of all the pages, this one has the most emphasis on text placement, like comparing the enlarged picture of the screw to a sword, the numbers counting the screws, and "up up up" being arranged to mimic a wisp of smoke.

i also wanted to lean into the viking/norse mythology influences with my word choice.

12. more nods to norn culture. i didn't know they referred to the six human gods as "spirits of action" until i was doing the research for this piece :O

and the domain of the lost is called a hall of ghosts....... cause valhalla.....

13.

i'm sorry this so funnyyy. SAYS the guy who literally clawed their way back to life for a rematch.

me when i'm in a sore loser competition and my opponent is the COMMANDER!!!

14. arms as in "limbs" and also arms as in "armaments" :•]

15. haha get it because the picture makes it look like there are two mirrored speech bubbles while the text paints two opposing interpretations of the norn commander. one that's selfless and humble versus one that's selfish and vainglorious.

16. and the best part is IT DOESN'T MATTER which one is true bc at the end of the day no matter what their motivation, balthazar is dead by their hand. ofc i'm of the opinion that the most compelling interpretation of the commander is both, simultaneously. contradictions are good for the soul.

17. i could've name-dropped kas, the only person present that would do something like that, but i felt it was better to leave it ambiguous.

18. low-hanging fruit. the metaphor was so obvious here but i had to do it. for the culture

19. the alternate title for this piece was "THIS COULD BE GLORY". "how to build a chair" was only supposed to be a placeholder title til i figured out a better one, but the innocuousness of it grew on me. also i came up with the other one too late and had already advertised under the chair title lol

20. my first instinct was to end it with something more reassuring, like "what you have built so far is enough" but that would've been an ooc switch-up for a narrator who has been nothing but snide and detached this whole time. gotta stick to my guns

21.

obligatory chair joke as the last line. for realsies though it’s meant to be an earnest appeal to the commander to take a break, to have a seat, but it’s also a challenge. are they willing to lean on their friends? are the bonds they’ve forged strong enough to hold their weight? are they willing to put their faith in someone else’s hands? are they brave enough to try? well. only one way to find out.

also guess what that wasn’t even the real last page of the manual. it's THIS

but no way i was letting this be the image we ended on. IT LOOKS LIKE A DICK AND BALLS!!!

and on that note, THANK YOU if you made it this far!! a very special shout-out to @hawkepockets, my lovely boyfriend and beta reader, without whom this piece would not be nearly as polished. i would bring him pages to look over and he would say Scrap half of those lines you can do better than that. kill your darlings. i would complain and argue for a few minutes then we would revise. rinse and repeat until we had honed this thing to perfection. i can't stress enough the importance of having a second pair of eyes on your work throughout your creative process, even better if it's someone who challenges you. i don't even pay him 🫶🏼

and if there was anything i didn't cover that you still have questions about, please feel free to shoot me an ask! (ㅅ´ ˘ `)♡ thanks for reading! see u later dudes ;P

#gw2 #guild wars 2 #my writing #for once i have nothing to say in the tags bc i already talked so much in the body of the post.#ummmmmmmm meows cutely !

136 notes · View notes

temporal-discounting · 6 months ago

Text

Apparently some people over on the hellsite formerly known as Twitter have described Ed as a psychopath. Many people have pointed out the racism inherent in this take - and while I wholeheartedly agree with that, I would like to focus here on what psychopathy actually is, and why it is absurd to apply that label to the character we see on our screens in OFMD.

To preface this, I am a research psychologist by training and have done some work on psychopathy. I am by no means an expert, though, so any corrections to how I have represented psychopathy here are welcome. This will be quite a long post, so I'm putting the rest under the cut.

OK, so what is psychopathy? The truth is, it has a very messy status. It does not appear in the DSM-5, which is the diagnostic manual for psychological disorders. Someone with psychopathic traits would likely be diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). But psychopathy as a construct is widely used in the scientific literature - especially clinical and forensic psychology - and it is used to describe a specific type of personality that overlaps with, but is distinct from, ASPD.

At the core of psychopathy is a lack of empathy and remorse; psychopaths see others not as fully realised people with rich inner lives, but as instruments to be used in pursuit of their own goals. Violent behaviour is not necessary or sufficient to be a psychopath but many psychopaths will use violence as a tool to further their own agenda, and they will not feel bad about it.

While 'diagnosing' fictional characters is a folly, in this case I think there is clear canonical evidence that Ed is not a psychopath.

Ed does not lack empathy. He empathises with Stede immediately - the very first thing he does when Stede wakes up is to reassure him that his crew is OK.

And there are numerous, non-Stede examples too. We see Ed empathise with the crew following the fuckery, with CJ when he lies about being mutinied, with Fang when they go fishing together...

Does Ed lack remorse? Very clearly not. His remorse over killing his father is absolutely fundamental to his character. And that remorse has led him to build up walls around the violence he has perpetrated and ordered as Blackbeard ("I didn't kill those guys, the fire did").

Ed's behaviour towards Lucius and the crew from 1.10 through to 2.2 could be construed as using violence instrumentally to achieve one's own goals. But the narrative makes it pretty clear that this behaviour is attributable to an acute mental health crisis - not to an innate personality type. And crucially, he feels remorse about this behaviour. He tries to make amends. He tries to do better.

Finally, Ed's entire arc of wanting to leave piracy behind would be very difficult to reconcile with him being a psychopath. He is unwavering in this desire from the moment we properly meet him - so much so that he is willing to leave behind the only person he has ever loved.

In summary, Ed is empathetic, he is plagued by the violence he has committed, and he wants to be a better man. These traits are wildly inconsistent with a psychopath.

So, er.... thanks for coming to my TED talk, I guess?

#ofmd meta #edward teach

137 notes · View notes

kisakis-boyfriend · 10 months ago

Note

Ladies and gentlemen, the bug has been fixed ⸜(｡• ᵕ • )⸝

So now if you don't mind I'm going to send another long ass thirst cuz I can't stfu

Mikey's been on my mind again and now I can't shake the sight of him with his body resting comfortably on the bed while your thrusts are torturously soft and slow, steady enough to make him feel good but too slow to make him cum, making him frustrated.

But if something frustrated him worse, was that your attention wasn't even on him, you had received a call and now you were talking peacefully with who knows whom while he was there desperate, annoyed and frustrated without being able to make a single noise because of the hand you held firmly against his mouth.

Mikey began to groan with a frown but he couldn't do much against the sharp thrust you gave him to keep him at bay. What had he done for you to torture him this way? Not even he knew, but now he had no choice but to continue squirming and whining as low as he could while he watched how your predatory eyes were on him but not the attention he so much loved. How cruel you were...

I swear Mikey is like the constant horny larva that crawls into my brain and I want to constantly make him miserable (with love, ofc) he's so ✨️✨️✨️

But either way I'm glad you don't have to constantly transcribe your asks anymore :) Anyway, thank you once again for coming to my ted talk~

I may have said this before, but something about Mikey just screams "Please be mean to me 👉👈". Torturing him with pleasure is a necessity 💛

Your ted talks are always welcome here, anon. The floor is all yours~

183 notes · View notes

softspaceboibrian · 1 year ago

Text

Fell in Love with the Fire Long Ago || Jamie Tartt

Chapters: 1 - more to come

Pairing: Jamie Tartt x Y/N - Social Media Manager for AFC Richmond || I used she/her pronouns, but there is no actual physical description, so the pronouns can be switched with whatever anyone wants or prefers!

Summary: When Y/N received that email, she couldn't believe it. He was coming back.

Warnings: maybe some swear words. hints and mentions of sexual acts (still SFW). S1 Jamie Tartt aka a dick. a little angsty. Sam being is lovable self.

Characters: Jamie Tartt, Sam Obisanya, Isaac McAdoo, Colin Hughes, Dani Rojas, Ted Lasso, Rebecca Welton. Some others may appear as mentions.

Wc: 3800 (this works as a pilot or a prologue, to set up the story)

A/N: this story is based on this idea I had and that a few people seemed to like. hopefully you enjoy this first chapter/prologue. and if you want to read more, feel free to leave a comment. If enough people like it, I was thinking to do a taglist, so that people can stay updated. anyways, thanks for reading <;3

When you first heard the news, you couldn’t believe it. You couldn’t believe that they could do such a thing. Not to the team, not to you. That was the reason you were stomping up the stair, the clinking of your heels echoing against the walls, as you reached Rebecca’s office.

You didn’t knock, you didn’t wait for them to welcome you in. They knew you were coming. Especially after the email they had sent out. The email had been sent only to the “necessary” people that needed to be involved, and you, being the social media manager for the club, received it. It was probably a way for them to warn you to start preparing the content for the announcement. But you obviously didn’t take it well. They knew about your history, they knew how things had gone down. They had to be expecting you.

“How could you?” Your loud, clear voice, full of anger and disappointment filled the room.

“Good morning, Y/N!” Ted’s cheerful greeting made you want to scream. “To what do we owe the pleasure?” The sarcasm was obvious.

“How could you? After what he did to the team? After what he said about you?” Your tone was loud, so much so that you were sure people from downstairs could clearly hear every single one of your words. “How could you?” You choked on your last words, and as you finally met Rebecca’s gaze, you could feel the familiar sting of the tears that threatened to fall, spill, pour.

The woman sighed, getting up from her chair to make her way around the big desk. “Listen, love, he’s a great player. When Ted told me about their talk, I knew we had to get him back.” She explained, walking over to her. “We cannot let our feelings get in the way of the team’s success.”

You shook your head, taking a step back. “I never thought you would become this cynical.”

“I’m not cynical, just rational.”

“It’s all the same thing. He’s a prick. And pricks don’t change.” You were furious. “And it’s not just my feelings, but the team’s feelings. But you obviously don’t remember how he used to treat everyone.” You lingered on that last word, looking briefly at each of them, before turning around and making your way out of the office and down the stairs. “No one understands.” You whisper, your fists so tight you started to feel that burning sensation of your nails leaving marks on your palms.

Keeping your head low, trying to hide the tears streaming down your face, you made your way to the changing room. You knew you couldn’t say anything to any of the boys yet, but still, you needed some comfort. You needed Sam.

You quickly reached the locker room and knocked, waiting for them to give you a sign to let you know you could come in. And, as soon as you opened the door, you ran straight to Sam, immediately burying your face in his chest.

“Hey, Y/N/N. What is going on?” His thick Nigerian accent immediately bringing comfort to you. “Did something happen?” He asked as he tried to pull away slightly, trying to understand what was happening.

“Just… hug me… please.” You pled, the voice muffled by his jersey. And he did. He wrapped his arms around you, softly placing a kiss on top of your head, before laying his chin in the same spot. You’re immediately comforted by the warmth of your best friend’s embrace. However, you didn’t fail to notice how the familiar chatter of the changing room had started to slowly simmer down until it ultimately came to a halt. A sense of pain and anxiety washed over you at once, and your head started again to fill with the same questions you had asked Rebecca and Ted. Why? Why him? Why now? How could they?

But soon, your stream of thoughts was interrupted by Isaac’s voice. “Who do we have to kill?” You didn’t need to raise your head from Sam’s chest to know that the feeling was shared by most if not all the team’s players.

“No one. Yet.” You mumbled, sniffling. “It’s complicated.” You added as you finally pulled away from Sam, yet still remaining extremely close to him, as if his presence was the only thing keeping you sane and calm at that moment.

“When the moment comes, just call, okay?” You gave a quick nod to the team captain, accompanied by a shy smile. To any casual passer-by, the comment may have seemed sarcastic, the usual banter between friends that care about each other. But the team knew that that was not sarcastic at all and that Isaac would indeed, without a shadow of a doubt, kill someone for you.

You couldn’t exactly remember when, but somewhere down the line, the team had become your chosen family. However, you could clearly remember how that process had started.

You had started working for AFC Richmond around the same time that Ted and Coach Beard did. You didn’t care much for football or sports in general, but you had just recently graduated from university and had found this work through Keeley. You and her had met at your cousin’s going away party a few years before, when he had decided to move to Greece to become an archaeologist. You had immediately bonded over who can even remember what, and remained close friends ever since. So, when she heard that the position had just opened up, she immediately sent your CV to Rebecca, without warning you first. You found out about the job only when you received a call from a certain Mr Higgins, who told you that they had read your curriculum and found it really interesting. And so, you ended up moving to Richmond-upon-Thames and started working for the club.

It didn’t take you long to get to know the team and become friends with them. Obviously, you had your prejudices against footballers, who you thought were self-centred egomaniacs – and you weren’t completely wrong about that – but, to your surprise, most of them turned out to be great people. You quickly became very close with Sam; Roy tolerated you; Isaac and Colin were always kind to you. Even Jamie Tartt, the prick of the team, would usually drop his dickhead persona when he was with you. And that was how you two ended up together. For the first month or so, you would notice his constant flirting, but you never really gave it too much thought. You had read about him in the tabloids, and you knew how he was famous for having a different girl every week. You weren’t that oblivious, you knew he was fit. But, every time he would flirt with you, you would play along for a while, before brushing it off and going back to your business. I’m just his latest challenge, he will move on sooner or later, you thought. Until, roughly a month and a half after you had started working there: he started waiting for you outside the clubhouse, asking you if you needed a ride home. Which then turned into him asking you to grab a coffee with him one day before practice. Then it was dinners. Movie nights at his place. Stolen glances in the hallways of the clubhouse. Sneaking in the boot room to secretly make out. And sooner than you could realise, you were sleeping over at his place most of the time.

You asked him to keep things private for a while. It wasn’t that you were ashamed of him. You just needed to be sure about him. So, you kept sneaking around. Avoiding each other as much as possible, too worried that the team might just figure it out. Let me show you off, Jamie would whisper into your ear, in-between wet kisses, as he stood behind you in the kitchen in the morning, wrapping his arms around your waists. Let me take you out to a restaurant, on a proper date, he insisted. But you kept declining his offers. Not yet, baby, you would reply, as you slowly melted under his touch, I need a little more time, you said as you turned around in his arms. And the conversation would die there, with Jamie immediately picking you up and placing you on top of the kitchen counter, his lips trailing their way down your neck, your collarbone, your chest, down, down, until your vision turned hazy and you had to grip onto the marble countertop with all the strength you had in your body, too afraid you might fall off of it, as his lips met finally met your core.

You were able to keep your relationship private longer than you had expected. It was after almost 4 weeks that Nate eventually walked in on you two in the boot room. You weren’t doing anything too private, you were merely making out. But Nate being Nate, froze on his feet as he saw you two holding onto each other, too stunned to move. I was… I needed to… sorry… I didn’t…. As usual, he was too embarrassed to form a complete sentence, so he simply left the room. You two looked at each other and knew that it was only a matter of time before your secret would be out. And you were right. The secret didn’t last the entire day, and when it was time to go home after practice, you were met by a horde of football players, asking you when it had started, how long had that been going on, if you two were official, and so on.

Somehow, but still not completely unexpectedly, the news reached the press in less than a day. The next morning, as you lied in bed with Jamie’s head on your chest, you were woken up by the constant buzzing of your phone. Check this article from The Sun, said a message from your high school friend, with a link attached to it. Is it true? Asked your mother. Congratulations! read the message from your aunt from whom you hadn’t heard in ages. And the messages kept coming. Yes, it was true. You were now in a relationship. Yes, your boyfriend was a famous footballer. Yes, you knew about his fame. Still, you didn’t care. Because, when Jamie was with you, he wasn’t Jamie Tartt, star striker for AFC Richmond, but just Jamie. And you loved just Jamie. He was sweet, he was passionate, he was kind, he always made sure you were feeling well, he brought you flowers once a week, he left some coffee for you in the pot in the mornings, he always made sure you were sexually satisfied – something he was really proud of.

Sadly, you hadn’t realised that, with going public, also came the hate from his fans, who thought that you would be too distracting for their beloved favourite player, and from the girls, the actresses, the top models, the reality tv stars, who had hoped to one day end up with him and whose dream you had shattered overnight. You pulled through it, and that was also thanks to Jamie, who never missed the chance to remind you how much he loved you and cared for you.

However, two months after going public, things started to change. You couldn’t understand why if it was something that you had done or said, but he started to become distant, cold. He would invite you less and less over to his place, and when he did, it was mainly to have sex, to ‘release the tension from practice’. And whenever the team lost, the sex would be rough. He was always on his phone, texting, dming, emailing. A part of you knew it was girls he was talking to, but you couldn’t bring yourself to confront him about it, so you just said nothing and held on. He soon stopped asking you how you were, telling you how much he loved you. You tried asking him what was going on, but he would always deny everything, saying that you were imagining things, that you were just paranoid, and that everything was fine. Fine. Oh, how you came to hate that word. You asked him how he was. Fine. You asked him if he wanted to spend the night together. Fine. You asked him if he wanted to drive to the clubhouse together. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. You hated fine. In Jamie’s language, fine meant if you really have to, or I would rather you left me alone, or I don’t really care. You hated it. And you hated what your relationship had become. But still, something stopped you from leaving him, maybe the hope that soon things would go back to normal, that soon he would go back to being just Jamie.

But that never happened.

And things only got worse when Ted decided to take him out during a match. You knew that Ted was doing it to teach him a lesson, and he was right to want to do so. But as you watched your boyfriend leave the pitch, you knew things would only get worse. So, you stopped constantly looking for him. You stopped texting him every day. You only met when he asked you.

It was in that period that you grew closer to Sam. You could distinctly remember the day he walked into your office to ask you for a few suggestions on how to make his Instagram page more appealing. Instead walked in on you sitting on the floor, with your back against the wall and your hands in your hair. You didn’t even have the strength to pretend things were okay, so you simply looked up, black lines scarring your cheeks, and met his eyes. “Sorry, Sam, it’s… not a great moment.” You struggled to get the words out.

But Sam didn’t say anything. Instead, he closed the door behind him, made his way across the room and took a seat on the floor next to you. “Is it Jamie?” He asked with his thick Nigerian accent that you would grow to love and even find familiar. You nodded silently. “Do you want to talk about it?” You shook your head. “Do we just sit in silence?” A nod. A beat. Then your head slowly fell to the side, until it found its resting place on his shoulder.

You don’t exactly know how long you stayed there, on the floor, in silence. It could have been a few minutes or entire hours. In either case, Sam stayed there, and didn’t leave your side. He never once took out his phone to check his messages, even though you could feel it buzzing in his pocket. He only changed position once, to move his arm and wrap it around your shoulders. That was the first time you had spent that much time in silence with someone without feeling the need to fill it with superficial chatter.

From that day forward, you and Sam were inseparable. There was something about him that simply brought you comfort, a comfort that not even Jamie had been able to give you. Whenever you weren’t sleeping over at Jamie’s, he would come to pick you up and drive you to work. He would drive you home in the evenings, making sure you were all the way inside your house, before sprinting off the road to go home himself. You would start having lunch together, usually joined by some of the other guys – in all of this, most of the time Jamie was nowhere to be found. And whenever your boyfriend acted like a dick with you in front of everyone, he would speak up. Are you his boyfriend now, Sammy? Jamie would mock him, using your nickname for him. I don’t think so. She’s me girl, so I’ll talk to her how I want, a’ight? He would puff out his chest, trying to look bigger and intimidating.

That evening, after practice was over, Jamie sprinted off to who knows where or to who knows who, leaving you there, alone. And, as per usual, Sam would come to the rescue, offering you a lift home.

“Why are you still with him?” Sam asked you as he stopped in front of your house. “You deserve better, not an asshole like him.”

You shook your head. “He’s not like that when it’s just the two of us.” You would always find a way to make excuses for him.

“I don’t care how he is when he’s alone with you, Y/N! If he really loves you, he should treat you well in public as well!” You had never really heard Sam raising his voice before, and it would have been a lie if you had said that you were not intimidated. But, despite everything, you could feel the care and preoccupation in his voice. “You deserve someone that truly cares for you, and that isn’t afraid to show it!” You knew he was right. Yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to say something, to break up with him.

But you never had to.

It was maybe a week after your discussion with Sam when you showed up unannounced at his place. It was cold outside, and you were only wearing a thick jumper. You stood there, in front of his door for at least three whole minutes, before finally knocking on his door. You knocked instead of ringing the bell so that if he was already asleep, you wouldn’t wake him. But he had heard it, and less than 10 seconds later, he was opening the door.

“Y/N, what are you-” He didn’t even finish his question. He took one look at you and knew exactly what had happened. He took your hand gently in his, and immediately pulled you inside, guiding you to the living room. “Wait here a moment.” He said, making you seat on the couch, before running off in search of a blanket. “Okay, wrap yourself in this while I put the kettle on.” He opened the blanket and put it around your shoulders.

“Stay here, please.” You whispered, grabbing him by the wrist before he could move away again.

“But you’re shivering.”

“Just… please.”

As soon as he met your eyes once again, he felt his heart drop to his stomach. He had seen you in distress before, he had comforted you multiple times after your fights with Jamie. But this time he didn’t even need for you to tell him what had happened, he already knew. He took a seat next to you, fixing the blanket so that it was properly covering your entire body, before pulling you to his chest.

“He said that I was too much work.” The words left your mouth watery. “That I asked too much of him. And that, since he was going back to Man City, it was better to call it quits.” You whispered. You could feel Sam’s body tense, the air blowing through his nose. You knew he wanted to say a lot of things. He wanted to tell you that he was a dickhead, that he never realised what he had in front of him, that he had just lost the best woman he could ever find, that he was a moron, a jerk, an idiot, a fool. But he didn’t. He remained silent. And he did the best he could to comfort you. He stroke your hair and your back, he rocked you and hummed to you, until you fell asleep.

After that night, it didn’t take long for the rest of the team to find out what had happened, and how it had happened. Every single one of the boys sent you a text, saying, each in their own way, that they were sorry, that Jamie was a dick, and that they were there for you if you needed them. And you were glad to know so many people cared for you, people that up until a few months ago didn’t even know you and that you would have never expected in your life to end up being friends with. They all stopped and hugged you when they met you in the corridor for the first time after it had happened. But some of them surprised you.

You hadn’t been able to sleep for the last few nights, which was made obvious to everyone by the way you dragged your feet against the floor whenever you walked around the clubhouse, your legs too heavy for your exhausted body to properly move. You had also stopped taking care of yourself. Yes, you showered and brushed your teeth because you hated not being presentable for work. But you had stopped brushing your hair every morning and every night, like your grandmother had thought you when you were little. And you had stopped wearing make-up. Not that you would normally put on a full face every day, but you stopped using mascara because it made your eyes burn whenever you cried, and the light concealer you used under your eyes to make yourself look fresher, more awake. And now your puffy red eyes and dark circles were there, on display, for everyone to see, a reminder of how you were feeling.

That morning you had opted for a very comfortable pair of sweatpants and a warm AFC Richmond hoodie. Using supportiveness as a way to hide your depression. Smart, you thought. Sad. You were sitting in your office, alone, working on the new social media campaign, when suddenly you heard someone knock on your door. “Come in.” You said flatly. As the door opened, you looked up from your laptop, only to see Sam walk in, followed by Isaac, Colin and Dani. “How can I help you, boys?” You forced a smile on your face.

“Want to watch a movie with us tonight?” Asked Isaac, taking the lead. You looked at the quartet in front of you, unsure of what to say. “We can watch whatever sad movie you prefer, and Dani can bring some Mezcal.”

“Boys, I-” You started, but you were instantly cut off.

“Uh-uh!” The Welsh stepped forward. “We don’t want to hear any I’d rather be alone or I don’t want to be a bother bullshit, okay? We want to do this.”

“Yes, we only asked to be nice, but if you say no, we will just kidnap you and force you to do it.” Said Sam, a soft, warm smile on his face, as he leaned over your desk.

“Por favor, Y/N” Dani pled, showing you his big, brown puppy eyes.

“Fine!” You gave in. “On one condition: we order Chinese.”

They all look at each other, before bursting out laughing.

A/N: if you read all the way through, thank you ! feel free to leave a feedback/comment. i would love to know what you think about it and if you would be interested in reading more of this story. let me know if you would like to be put in a taglist for this fic! love you <3

#jamie tartt #jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt fic #ted lasso #softspaceboibrian writings #ted lasso fic #sam obisanya #isaac mcadoo #colin hughes #dani rojas #rebecca welton #roy kent #keeley jones #coach beard

637 notes · View notes