#hey I didn't make any jabs at Luna this time! I restrained myself. Where's my thank you?

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I was watching this amazing video by Cinema Therapy (if you haven't watched any of them, I highly recommend that channel) and one thing that the couple's therapist said struck me so hard because it immediately reminded me of Simbar:

“He feels betrayed because there was a lie. He doesn’t take the time to consider the why.

And that’s the thing. There can be wrong behavior in a relationship. But when we fail to consider the why, we fail to see the person.

And it may not change the outcome of things. Like, if someone lies to you or deceives you, betrays your trust, you may choose not to trust them anymore.

But when we just look at behavior and we don’t look at motivation… Once again, we make misjudgments, and that’s exactly what he does.”

AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS PLEASE?? SKJDFNDKJS

I just really wanna point out Simón's growth regarding this. By the end of season 2, this is exactly what he does: He finds out about the handkerchief and everything Ámbar has done, and he doesn't even try to listen to the why. Which is very ironic because he asks her Why like a thousand times. He's going "Why would you do that? Why, Ámbar?" but he never gives the time for an answer. His whys are not really a petition for motive, they're just accusations.

BUT THEN, WE HAVE SIMÓN IN SEASON 3

And jesus christ, I love this.

So, it starts as early as episode 2 when they have their conversation at the sidewalk. He's once again accusing her, once again judging her for ruining Luna's party, but this time Ámbar fires back and she goes "What about me?"

And it's so interesting because you can see Simón genuinely didn't thought about that, he didn't consider how Ámbar might feel about the whole thing, and he even admits it (because he's not a prideful person, he does what's right, and admitting his wrongs is right).

AND HE UNDERSTANDS.

He still thinks it's wrong, but he gets now where she's coming from, and he validates it, and S2 Simón would never because he didn't even listen.

Now. This is not a complete shift, it's not full growth, because, as you might notice, he didn't ask about her motivation; Ámbar presented it to him. (Because she's tired of all these things happening to her and no one considering how they affect her, but that's a whole different text post entirely--Which can hastily be summarized in I hate so many people except Mónica).

What's really precious is what happens with Felipe Mendevilla's number. Because then he asks. And he listens. And instead of going "Well, you shouldn't feel like that, this was wrong wrong wrong and I'm telling everyone about this, you psycho", he walks her through it. He goes, okay, I understand your emotions, but you must know, deep down, that your reaction to said emotions was unfair. He appeals to her own good judgement instead of hanging her at the altar of his own.

(Don't take me wrong tho, he's still a self-righteous bitch, but he's learning, alright?)

Now, while that whole thing ended in fiasco-- And I gotta blame Simón for this one because, has he ever heard of baby steps? He wants to appeal to her good judgement, okay, but the first task he asks of her is apologizing to her sworn nemesis; Seriously, Simón? Really? You truly thought that was the way to go? Okay-- I think it really shows how Simón also tried to make concessions to make things work with Ámbar. Because I see many discourses that go "Simón only wanted to change Ámbar, Ámbar had to change her whole self to be with him", and I just think that's not correct ?? Sure, it wasn't a 50/50 thing, absolutely, but surprise surprise! It almost never is in real relationships; and Simón did put in some effort, it just wasn't very grand compared to Ámbar-- But that's precisely why I'm making this post.

Between the sidewalk talk and the Felipe Mendevilla thing were some good 30 episodes or so, so about some weeks. In that time, Simón went from not thinking about motivations to actively asking for them and trying to guide her into a different, less hostile way to deal with things. And while, sure, the main motivator from his part was the attraction he felt towards her, absolutely, I think that's something he eventually could've been able to kill if he truly believed Ámbar was hopeless. Like, if she was just a bad person period.

Which is a very strong stance to take but that's precisely what he did by the end of season 2. When he says "You're full of hate" what he's saying is, this person is rotten inside, only a person rotten inside could do this; she is a bad person.

And I think, (besides the time he spent in Cancún which helped him to get some more perspective maybe and reconcile what he lived with Ámbar vs all the bad things Ámbar did), that the moment that really helped him make that mental shift was precisely that sidewalk talk. It was realizing "Oh, she's feeling bad about all of this", and "Oh, she actually has valid reasons to be feeling bad about all of this". Because from then on, Ámbar kept antagonizing the Roller, openly. Simón could've had all the reason in the world to go "She's just a bad person, let's forget about her". Except now he's got a glimpse into her point of view. And as he watches her --and he watches her a lot-- he starts realizing that something, just, doesn't fit. Sure, she does bad things, but she's not evil, he can tell. And then she hugs him at the lockers and he goes "Ah, right. This is not a bad person. This is a person grieving."

And that just makes all the difference, because she's not rotten inside; she's hurt.

"When we fail to consider the why, we fail to see the person." Simón starts seeing the person, and I gotta say, he was pretty much the only one, along with Mónica, who did.

And that, for this self-righteous bastard that I love so much, it's growth.

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[You might have noticed I didn't mention their slow dance in episode 1 and that's because... narratively it makes no sense sdkfns. Like, don't take me wrong, I love it just as much as any simbar shipper, but were the writers on crack? I mean, after how season 2 ended, why the hell would Simón ask her to dance all flirty-like? Because it wasn't even a "Oh, everyone else already paired up and we have no one, I guess I'll dance with you" situation, it was right up "Dance with me if you dare *smirk* *bedroom eyes*"

Which, again, I love, but what the fuck sdkfns. The only explanation I can arrive to is just hormones dkjfn, which doesn't sit very right with me because that means he asked her because "Hey, you look hot and we made out once, wanna dance?" I- 🤣🤣🤣]