#here's to three years of true colors! it's changed my brain chemistry forever!!

[iersei]

YOUR TRUE COLORS

[fletchphoenix]

Some Mistakes Get Made

Chapter 12 is here. Sorry they keep getting shorter - I’m building up to some good stuff hopefully but right now the boys are...at an all time low to say the least. I mean, I made my girlfriend cry with the previous chapter so..anyway. Thanks for the support and onwards with the chapter

TW - Panic attacks

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Numb. That’s all Hugo really felt - completely numb as he laid in his old bedroom at Donella’s house, his eyes fixated on and staring at the cracks that ran over the ceiling. The room had a significant lack of green and blue that he was so used to, devastating him to no end with the thought of the colors reminding him of the boy that he missed so dearly. He shook the thought of the other from his brain, turning over on the too-small bed and fixing his eyes on the wall. The wall was bare too - no pictures or memories or..anything that was brought into his life over the past six months. He’d changed so much over those six months, yet as soon as that..woman entered their lives not even twenty-four hours ago, Varian was willing to give it all up for her. Had Varian even loved him or felt the same as he did?

  Questions drifted around his head as he lay there, a monotone expression on his face as he tried to deal with his inner turmoil and heartbreak caused by the younger boy. He’d have to move all his stuff back here again and go back to how he was before..what had Ulla even told him? What did Varian mean when he said Donella ‘took his mother away from him’? Did he even know what had happened between the two women? Why did he want Hugo out of his life when none of this was Hugo’s fault? He raised his phone to his face, his face shifting to a frown at the mass of missed calls from Varian before he set it aside and sat up. No. If that’s what Varian truly wanted then..then that was that. They were through and Hugo would abide by the boys wishes, because all he wanted was to make Varian happy.

  Even if that meant completely erasing himself from the other’s life.

  He rose to his feet, eyes looking around the room once again as he’d been doing for the past hour. He missed the familiarity of the apartment, but he guessed there’d be no going back there now for a while. He let out a sigh and checked his phone - Wednesday. His last class before summer, just what he needed to get the other boy out of his mind. Perfect! He could just...mess around and go back to normal. He straightened out his clothes and reached out for a watch, placing it on his left wrist and completely concealing the small tattoo of the test tube that sat on it. That was that. He strode across the room, pushing open the door to his room and making his way down the hall to his one real ally’s workshop - Donella’s. 

  With shaking hands, he twisted the doorknob, sliding the door open, and entered. The woman was already leaning over a contraption of some sorts, goggles over her eyes before she raised her head and raised them, her eyes fixed on the boy. “You need a ride to university, I’m assuming?” He nodded. “Are you sure you want to go?” He nodded again, more adamantly this time. She let out an exasperated sigh, rubbing her temple. “Aright, Cyrus will be ready for you in five minutes. Don’t be late.” She watched as he headed towards the door, her mouth opening to say something before snapping shut as he closed the door. “Have a good day, son.” she muttered to herself before getting back to work. 

  Hugo leaned against the wall of an alley outside, playing a game on his phone as he waited for Cyrus. He knew he had a wife, but god, did it really take that long to just show up to take him to university? A car horn blared and he made his way to the passenger’s side, not even sparing the driver a second glance as he slammed the door shut behind him and let him get going. He really wasn’t in the mood for conversation - Cyrus thankfully seemed to pick up on this after his first three questions gained no response from the blonde. He didn’t trust himself to speak, with how hoarse his voice had felt after a whole night of sobbing over...no. No thinking about him. They were done, remember? “He never wants to see you again.” Hugo reminded himself as he placed his headphones on his head and looked out of the window in silence. 

  “What did I do wrong?!” he sobbed as he sat in Donella’s arms on the workshop floor. He couldn’t understand - why? Everything was fine before that...that WOMAN showed up! What had she told him? What made him hate Hugo so much for someone else’s actions? He didn’t want to accept it - he’d just lost Varian. Varian, the one true light in his life, the one good thing that had happened to him since..well, since forever, had just left him like everyone else in his wretched life - just like he’d known he would since the beginning. His body wracked with sobs as he held onto Donella’s shirt tight, the older woman making no move to shove him off, instead opting to stroke his hair and hold him close. 

  “This isn’t your fault.” She said with a frown, and for the first time..Hugo believed it. He believed that she was right and that it wasn’t his fault - because what had he done to ‘ruin Varian’s life’? The answer was nothing - the boy just wanted to hurt him and break him like everyone else did, opting to make his way into his heart just to shatter it as soon as the opportunity arose. “C’mon Hugo, let’s get you to your room and you can sleep it off.” Donella virtually whispered, the blonde following her instructions and walking behind her in silence, his eyes focused on the floor with tears halting as he made his way down. This wasn’t his fault. It never was. 

  Donella came to a stop, gesturing to the door in front of her and letting Hugo pass to enter. “Goodnight-” she tried to say, the door slamming in her face. He made his way over to his bed and stared at his phone in silence, the boy’s face staring back at him with a wide smile that now made Hugo’s heart burn with pain and upset. He shut the device off, slamming it onto the bedside table, before he turned away and shook, Varian’s words echoing in his head. He fell asleep curled up, his glasses still on his face and tear trails making their wet puddles on the pillows he rested his head on.

  “Okay kiddo, we’re here.” Cyrus commented, his voice hushed as he snapped Hugo out of his flashback session. The golden haired boy muttered a quick ‘thanks’ before grabbing his things and exiting the car, slamming the door behind him once again before heading down towards the campus and his classroom. Everyone seemed to make a path for him, whispering amongst themselves as he weaved through the small crowds with chuckles occasionally leaving their mouths. He ignored them to the best of his ability, shoving open the door to his classroom and making his way to his seat in absolute silence. Sitting down in his seat, he pulled the hood of his jacket up and slumped back, letting himself daydream as much as he dared to. It’s not as if this class mattered anyway, it was the final day until summer and next year would be his last. He drowned out the voice of his lecturer as the lesson began, trying to think of anything but the raven haired, blue eyed boy which tore his heart in half. 

  Varian walked through the hall towards the library after his final chemistry lesson of the year, trying to ignore the knife of guilt twisting in his stomach after last night’s...events. He had tried to call Hugo to apologise, to tell him he hadn’t meant what he’d said, but he had no response from the older male whatsoever. He just prayed he was safe, he thought, as he buried his head into the older boy’s hoodie. He’d even worn one of Hugo’s shirts (much too big for him) to provide him some relief and feel close to the boy.

  He regretted every word of what he said - he didn’t mean to say what he said or even break up with the other boy, because it just wasn’t fair on him. He had no say in what happened between his mother and Donella - hell, he probably wasn’t even in Donella’s care at that point. He wasn’t sure if the actual relationship between them was even mother and son, Hugo having never been open about his familial life. He shouldn’t have let his anger get to him the way it did, taking it all out on Hugo when he’d done absolutely nothing wrong...He chewed the inside of his cheek and groaned, before a familiar face passed him in the hall. 

  He couldn’t help his smile when he saw Hugo, his hand reaching out to grab the other’s wrist. “Hugh! Oh my god, Hugo, I thought I wouldn’t see you again! We need to-” He was stopped when the blonde pulled his wrist away from his grasp harshly, his back to Varian, however Varian could tell a glare covered his features. 

  “Isn’t that what you wanted? To never see me again?” Hugo spat back, coldly. Even Varian winced at how raspy and hoarse the boy’s voice was - evidently Varian had broken his heart. “Varian, I don’t really want to talk to you right now. Or ever. Goodbye.” he continued as he started to walk down the hall. Ouch, they were on a first name basis now? Why wouldn’t Hugo just listen to him?

  “Hugo please, listen to me-”

  “What? Listen to you so you can break my heart again? So you can make a point about how much I ruined your life and how much you hate me for it? About how done we are and how much you despise me? Face it, you said it yourself. You hate me. And you never wanted to see me last time I checked so how about you keep your goddamn promises for once and leave?!” He yelled, fists clenched at his sides and heartbreak painted all over his features as he continued his rant.

  “And yknow what sucks? I actually loved you so much! I was in it for the long run, hell, I’d already imagined how I was gonna propose to you, but I guess that’s never happening now, is it, being as you never wanna see me again! I had our whole life planned out and that we were going to be together no matter what life threw at us, but I guess you just weren’t that dedicated, were you? Do me a favour, Varian. Leave.” He finished with a glare, turning on his heel and walking out of the building, not looking back once as he continued, pushing open the doors to the university and hurrying down the stairs. 

  Hugo hurriedly pulled out his phone, already feeling himself fall victim to his sadness again as he raised it to his ear after dialling Cyrus’ number. “Pick me up.” he declared-well, more like ordered as soon as the man picked up the phone. “I don’t care if you’re busy, I need to get outta this hellhole now so please just come and pick me the hell up!” That silenced the man on the other end, before confirming and hanging up. He rocked back and forth from his heels to his toes and back again multiple times as he yelled, feeling people’s eyes as they stared at him.

  As soon as the car pulled up, Hugo heard Varian scream his name. He paid him no mind, hurrying to get in the car. “Just drive.” he told Cyrus, sensing the man’s hesitation before stating yet again. “DRIVE, CYRUS!” he yelled, his knees tucking against his chest as he curled up in the passenger’s seat and rocked back and forth, his chest heaving and trembling. He felt like he was dying, his stomach churning and his head spinning combined with the ringing in his ears and the sensation of choking made him feel disorientated even though they were in the car. He couldn’t breathe at all as he gasped for breath with his heart racing all the while his nausea still continuing. All the faces - all those eyes on him and Varian- he couldn’t handle any of it. Cyrus stopped the car on a deserted country road, Hugo falling out of the car almost immediately and curling up on the floor, his shins and forehead pressed against the asphalt of the road as he tried to regain his senses. 

  “You with me, big guy?” Cyrus asked almost half an hour later, cautiously stepping closer and sitting beside Hugo on the side of the road in an uncomfortable silence. “Donella told me what happened with the boy and...you need to know..Donella lied about that night with Ulla. From what I can recall, she did want to sell their inventions and research to the Saporians, who would no doubt use them to hurt people. Ulla, knowing she couldn’t let that happen, did steal the papers and hurt Donella in the process though.” Cyrus sighed, making sure it was okay before placing a hand on Hugo’s back and carefully pulling him into a side hug, the younger man’s head resting against his shoulder. “They are both in the wrong for what they did, neither of them are saints...but don’t let their mistakes hurt you like it corrupted both of them. That boy..he loves you. I can tell from the way he looked at you when he called your name. It’s going to take a while for you two to trust each other again, but you’ll get there. You just need to try. Okay?” 

  Hugo bit the inside of his cheek before nodding, moving to hug Cyrus fully. “I wanna go somewhere. Not home but somewhere.” He muttered against the older man, sighing and done with all the crying and heartbreak. 

  “How about you join me and my wife for dinner..? I’m sure she’d be delighted to finally meet the infamous Hugo I’ve been telling her about for all these years.” He asked with a grin, helping Hugo stand when he agreed to the proposal. The odd pair got in the car and Cyrus began to drive again, glancing over at the other, who was currently staring out the window at the slowly darkening sky. He just hoped the boy had listened to him and that he would feel better one day. It didn’t have to be now, just..he hated to see the younger male so broken over a boy of all things. He turned his attention to the road. They had a long drive ahead of them.

  Varian stood in shock outside of the campus, his hands falling to his sides as he didn’t even realise he’d been reaching out for his boyfriend- sorry, Hugo. It hurt to hear that all - to know just how much he’d hurt the other boy. He really was down for the count with Varian, huh? The inner corners of his eyebrows raised as his eyes met the floor, trying to erase the image of how bitter Hugo looked from his mind. And what’s worse was..he deserved it. He deserved every single word of Hugo’s rant. He let out a loud sigh and composed himself, trekking towards the library. He had to be strong - if not for himself, then to make Nuru and Yong think he was okay. 

[waltrp]

NO, DON’T PUSH US AWAY, HIRO. WE’RE HERE FOR YOU

BIDDI BOPPI BOOP A SPECIAL MESSAGE ADMIN ZULEMA: jill my queen, i know how long you’ve wanted to take up this angel and i’m so happy to finally bestow her to you. your sample for haven was amazing. You know this character inside and out. the love and passion you have translated perfectly into your para and i’m so excited to see what you do with her !! also nag me to finish the cast so i can see cute big hero 6 interactions on the dash lmfao. Please refer to THIS PAGE for your next tasks. We can’t wait to roleplay with you. Welcome to our Ohana xx.

It’s a pleasure to meet you…

Jill, 30, eastern, she/her

My favorite color is purple

My favorite super hero is Kate Bishop/Hawkeye

I’ve seen Parks & Rec so many times I can “watch” the show with my eyes closed

No triggers

Are you positive you can be active?

yes indeed

How did you stumble upon Walt?

we go way back

Did you read the rules?

yup!

Are you sure?

Scuttle

Character you want?

Haven Lemos

Please describe the character for us

When Haven was born, her parents said they could have sworn they gave birth to the sun, so bright and cheerful their little one was. Growing up wasn’t easy for Haven—her family immigrated from Cuba to the United States when she was small. Haven doesn’t remember a life in Cuba, but she knows that everything her parents have done was to secure a better life for their children, and because of that Haven has always admired them.

Haven’s formative years were spent in Miami, Florida, which meant that even though she was away from Cuba, she was able to grow up immersed in her culture even outside of her own home. The older she grew, the more responsibilities fell to Haven, but she took every one of them in stride. With parents that were constantly working to make ends meet, Haven spent much of her free time taking care of her siblings. She may have grown up faster than most kids her age, but Haven never let that get to her. Her optimism and sunny disposition were constant. Haven worked as hard as her parents in every thing she did. She wanted to make them proud and wouldn’t take their sacrifices for granted. One day, Haven hoped to take care of them the way they took care of her.

As a child, most of her peers found her to be strange. Haven has always been quirky and unique, and to top it off she was smart and her favorite subject was science. Most of the other kids couldn’t quite relate—their favorite subject was recess, long after recess stopped being a thing. Haven became one of the top students in science for their school district, and graduated with AP courses in biology, physics, and chemistry (her favorite). To Haven, the logical next stop was the prestigious San Fransokyo Institute of Technology. She wanted to attend the school so desperately, but knew that with her family’s financial situation, it was only a dream. But with a push from her chemistry teacher, Haven’s dreams came true: admission and a full scholarship.

At SFIT, Haven truly came into her own. She was surrounded by students similar to herself, and lucky enough to spend every day learning more about the thing she absolutely loved. Chemistry came naturally to the girl, and it wasn’t long before she was conducting her own experiments, hoping to push the subject to new heights, beyond anything the world already knew. The only thing that made the experience better than she could ever imagine was the group of friends she almost suddenly found herself a part of. She couldn’t imagine how she had managed a life without the four of them. She even had a nickname among the group: Honey Lemon. (You’d have to ask Freddy why.)

It didn’t take long for the crush to develop. Tadashi Hamada was her friend and her equal. How could she not fall in love? The friendship blossomed into a full-on mutual flirtation after the two were paired up for a class project. She loved everyone in their group, but Tadashi easily moved from best friend to boyfriend. Not wanting to disrupt the group dynamic, the duo decided it would be best to keep their relationship quiet for now. The transition started slowly, with stolen kisses when no one else was looking, and much more free time dedicated to simply spending time together. They would lie awake for hours in each other’s dorm rooms, talking about science, their lives, and their futures.

Haven and Tadashi never got the chance to make the possibility of a future between the two of them official. Their junior year, Tadashi helped his brother Hiro enter the SFIT school science fair. Haven had heard so much about Hiro, and the whole group was there to support Tadashi’s younger brother. The kid was only 13, but he may have been the smarted thirteen-year-old Haven had ever known. Even at his young age, Hiro would be a perfect fit at SFIT. When a mysterious fire broke loose at the fair, everything changed. Students, faculty, and visitors all evacuated, and not moments after the last person was out of the building, the whole place exploded. When the smoke cleared in the early hours of the morning, one thing was clear:

Tadashi never made it out of the building.

Haven had never imagined heartbreak to feel this way. A piece of her heart was missing, and Haven was sure it would never feel whole again. How do you move on from such a loss? Whatever Haven felt at the loss of Tadashi, she put on a brave face when around her friends. Haven wasn’t going to stop being the ray of sunlight and optimism she’d always been, for all of them, for herself, and especially for Hiro. The young boy had now lost both his parents and his older brother, and with all the love she had for Tadashi, she was going to look after Hiro as much as she could.

With SFIT destroyed, the students were relocated to Elias. The new location helped Haven move on. She graduated from Walt University with top honors and started working toward building the future she’d talked so often about with Tadashi. Now she’s attending graduate school, working part time in a lab, and working as a teaching assistant in the Walt chemistry department. Tadashi is on her mind constantly. But Haven is looking forward to better days.  

Second character choice

n/a

It’s time to see that sample para.

Peach cream smudged cheeks. A thin, careful stroke of liner. Mascara. Waterproof. Uncertainty behind saddened eyes. Hair twisted up into a high bun. The best way to keep it out of her experiments. He’d casually remarked that one day. Still she let wispy bangs hang loose. A generous swipe of neutral toned lipstick. Lips pressed together to distribute the color, and Haven sighed.

Heartbreak wasn’t supposed to happen this way. The love of your life wasn’t supposed to die at twenty-one.

Haven stared at her reflection, and the person staring back at her seemed like a muted version of herself. A neutral face, hair up, black dress, black tights, black everything. Haven fidgeted with the peter pan collar at her neck, the white a stark contrast to everything else. It seemed both so wrong and right at the very same time. She’d never been one to conform, and for that moment she knew that even in his death, Tadashi would be proud. Glasses were carefully replaced to their spot at the bridge of her nose. She’d chosen the translucent pair for this occasion.

A faint drizzle had started as she stepped out from the dorms, and she wondered idly how long the students would be able to stay. There wasn’t exactly a school anymore, but that was a worry for Future Haven. The weather wasn’t a surprise, especially for northern California this time of year, but still it felt appropriate. As if they sky, too, knew of the tragedy they mourned today. Meteorology was a science, after all, and whether they knew it or not, the science community had suffered a great loss.

By the time they reached the cemetery, rain poured from the sky. A fitting welcome, Haven thought, quickly stepping beneath Wyatt’s unfurled umbrella. Hers was a bright pink, a perfect spot of brightness in normal dreary weather, but today that didn’t seem right. Eventually Haven knew she’d put on her bright sunny disposition as often as she could, but right now was a time to let themselves mourn.

The service wasn’t terribly long, expected due to the rain. The plot was near his parents’, and every so often, Haven would look over to glimpse at Hiro. She couldn’t imagine how he was handling things right now. When all was said and done, the group began to disperse, planning to gather afterwards at Aunt Cass’s where friends and family could drink tea and share memories. Their little friend group, now minus a member, lingered, and she’s pretty sure it was Leiko who shoved the umbrella in her hand before they, too, left for the Lucky Cat.

So this was it. Haven Lemos, alone, and Tadashi Hamada’s grave. The plot of grass where he’d lay forever. It wasn’t far from where his parents lay, the three of them at least together again in their final resting place. Haven’s eyes lingered on the headstone, and the hyphen within which Tadashi’s entire life lay. All of his accomplishments, his light, his laughter, his love, her love for him, his brain, his smile, reduced to a punctuation mark, followed by a date past which the two of them would never truly be a couple.

Moments passed until finally Haven knew it was time. Gently she placed her hand atop the marble headstone, caressing it as if she would his face. The ‘I love you’ was implicit; she needn’t speak those three little words aloud. Gathering herself, Haven tightened her grip on the umbrella before heading in the direction of the Lucky Cat Café to meet up with the others at Aunt Cass’s.

This wasn’t the last time she’d see this place.

Anything else, love?

sad breakfast club