#hence why I am deny that reality and substituting my own

[fistfuloflightning]

Hammond and Eider from Pfeos: A Voyage to Liberation

[witchbitchheadedtoaditch]

Shadow Work Prompts Part 2

Hello my loves! I'm going to add some more shadow work prompts (primarily because... Kaye needs to do shadow work and maybe this will convince them to do it. (It won't. We all know it won't. But we can hope....))

I'm gonna put these below the cut just so people don't have to scroll through this long as fuck list on their dash if they don't want to see them lol

Some of these are really, really heavy, and do touch on things like sexual assault, abuse, death, etc., so this is the trigger warning for you.

A lot of these are also focused on women and AFAB folks because I'm trying to reconcile with my femininity and whatnot.

Anne Carson Quotes

You remember too much, my mother said to me recently. Why hold onto all that? And I said, Where can I put it down?

Why does tragedy exist? Because you are full of rage. Why are you full of rage? Because you are full of grief.

Words bounce. Words, if you let them, will do what they want to do and what they have to do.

Eros is an issue of boundaries. He exists because certain boundaries do. ... Eros: the boundary of flesh and self between you and me.

Desire is no light thing.

It is easier to tell a story of how people wound one another than of what binds them together.

Reality is a sound, you have to tune in to it not just keep yelling.

All mortals owe a debt to death.

...sex is a substitute, like money or language.

...your story begins the moment Eros enters you. That incursion is the biggest risk of your life. How you handle it is an index of the quality, wisdom, and decorum of the things inside you.

Myths are stories about people who become too big for their lives temporarily, so that they crash into other lives or brush against gods. In crisis their souls are visible.

Philosophers say man forms himself in dialogue.

There is no person without a world.

If there is anything dearer than being alive, it's dark to me.

We humans seem disastrously in love with this thing... life.

The underworld's a blank and all the rest just fantasy.

Caught between the tongue and the taste.

What is mortality after all but divine doubt flashing over us? For an instant God suspends assent and poof! we disappear.

Girls are cruelest to themselves.

What really connects words and things?

Blessed be they whose lives do not taste of evil

Perhaps the hardest thing about losing a lover is to watch the year repeat its days.

Consider incompleteness as a verb.

You can get used to anything, my mother was in the habit of saying.

I am talking about evil. It blooms. It eats. It grins.

I don't want to be a person. I want to be unbearable.

Beauty makes me hopeless.

The dead... are victims of love, many of them.

To live past the end of your myth is a perilous thing.

You read a hundred military manuals you won't find the word kill they trick you into killing.

I went mad, a god hurt me, I fell.

Those nights lying alone are not discontinuous with this cold hectic dawn. It is who I am.

Love does not make me gentle or kind.

Your grief is as great as your splendor was: some god is weighing the one out equal to the other.

You can never know enough, never work enough, ... never leave the mind quickly enough.

Language is what eases the pain of living with other people, language is what makes the wounds come open again.

Where does unbelief begin?

Everything that is me is with me.

A wound gives off its own light...

I began to think I was someone thirsting for God.

You are a person in love with the impossible.

When we are denied a story, a light goes off.

Some conversations are not what they're about.

I lack myself.

Who knows what will happen if I'm alone with my grief.

I... forbid that you should ever lose your screams.

You are not a god. You are not that enlarged self. Indeed, you are not even a whole self, as you now see. Your new knowledge of possibilities is also a knowledge of what is lacking in the actual.

There is a loneliness that fills the plain.

The women of mythology regularly lose their form in monstrosity.

We live by waters breaking out of the heart.

Time as hunger. Time passing and gazing. Time as perseverance. Mountain time. Time as paper folded to look like a mountain. Time compared to the wild fantastic silence of stars.

What are we made of but hunger and rage?

When I look at you, even for a moment, no speaking is left in me.

Kelly Cherry Quotes

I didn't find my story; it found me.

There is blood everywhere and I am lost in it. I breathe blood, not air.

The story of [their] great-grandfather [or any ancestor]... was [their] own story, too.

Ashe Vernon Quotes

Don't you dare, for one minute, believe that my kindness makes me anything but insurmountable.

Understand that I am not your next victim in a laundry list of broken girls.

I will eat you alive before I let you make a meal of me.

What they don't tell you about standing up for what you believe in is that your feet will bruise and your legs will ache.

I'd like to take a moment to submit a formal apology to my soft parts because they kept me warm when I was trying to freeze to death, and I hated them for it.

I let myself be afraid.

When you learn you are only as good as your beauty routine, you forget how to define yourself by anything else.

I will know how to be vulnerable with you, but I won't know how to not regret it.

I know how to put my body inside someone else's but not how to make it beautiful.

I love better at a distance.

I am as much lion as I am lion tamer.

I got good at inflicting pain the same way I got good at soothing it.

Quit picking old wounds and going tor walks in the aches and pains you already made it through--you call it healing, but it sounds like a good way to take a haunting home with you.

I am a cathedral of almost-lovers

Louise Gluck Quotes

We look at the world once, in childhood. The rest is memory.

I thought that pain meant I was not loved. It meant I loved.

The soul is silent. If it speaks at all it speaks in dreams.

Intense love always leads to mourning.

You will never let go, you will never be satiated.

It will feed you, it will ravish you, it will not keep you alive.

Why love what you will lose? There is nothing else to love.

I speak because I am shattered.

I don't need your praise to survive.

Whatever returns from oblivion returns to find a voice.

Nakedness in women is always a pose. I was not transfigured. I would never be free.

The unsaid, for me, exerts great power.

I am tired of human... I want to live on the sun

Death cannot harm me more than you have harmed me, my beloved life.

There are places like this... you enter as a young girl... you never return.

Writing is a kind of revenge against circumstance, too: bad luck, loss, pain. If you make something out of it, then you've no longer been bested by these events.

The riddle was: why couldn't we live in the mind. The answer was: the barrier of the earth intervened.

It is true that there is not enough beauty in the world. It is also true that I am not competent to restore it. Neither is there candor, and here I may be of some use.

You're not a creature in body. You exist as the stars exist, participating in their stillness, their immensity.

And then, suddenly, something is over.

You must be taught to love me. Human beings must be taught to love silence and darkness.

Sappho Quotes

Someone will remember us/I say/even in another time.

Their heart grew cold. They let their wings down.

What cannot be said will be wept.

What is beautiful is good, and who is good will soon be beautiful

Once again love drives me on, that loosener of limbs, bittersweet creature against which nothing can be done.

Love shook my heart like the wind on the mountain rushing over the oak trees

Love is a cunning weaver of fantasies and fables.

I know not what to do, my mind is divided.

The female creature is a letter.

No holy place existed without us then

She who loves roses must be patient and not cry when she is pierced by thorns.

Because I prayed this word: I want.

If you had a desire for good or beautiful things and your tongue were not concocting some evil to say, shame would not hold down your eyes but rather you would speak about what is just.

Wealth without virtue is no harmless neighbor.

I am weary of all your words and soft, strange ways.

Paisley Rekdal Quotes

Does it offend you to watch me working in it, touching my hands to the greening tips or tearing the yellow stalks back, so wild the living and dead both snap off in my hands?

I can wait longer than sadness.

It is such a small thing to be proud of.

Should I, too, not be loved?

We are even now still so young

I loved him. I loved forgiving him.

Yasmin Belkhyr Quotes

Contrary to wound, I still know nothing of defeat.

Contrary to ache, I still know nothing of guilt.

I help: a good daughter.

Someone always ends up holding something mangled.

It wasn't enough to feel... he had to see, to know.

Adrienne Rich Quotes

There must be those among whom we can sit down and weep and still be counted as warriors.

Lying is done with words, and also with silence

Responsibility to yourself means refusing to let others do your thinking, talking, and naming for you; it means learning to respect and use your own brains and instincts; hence, grappling with hard work.

When a woman tells the truth she is creating the possibility for more truth around her.

My heart is moved by all I cannot save: so much has been destroyed

If you are trying to transform a brutalized society into one where people can live in dignity and hope, you begin with the empowering of the most powerless. You build from the ground up.

Until we know the assumptions in which we are drenched, we cannot know ourselves.

The truth of our bodies and our minds has been mystified to us.

It will take all your heart, it will take all your breath. It will be short, it will not be simple.

You look at me like an emergency.

The unconscious wants truth. It ceases to speak to those who want something else more than truth.

In a world where language and naming are power, silence is oppression, is violence.

There is no 'the truth', 'a truth'--truth is not one thing, or even a system. It is an increasing complexity. The pattern of the carpet is a surface. When we look closely, or when we become weavers, we learn of the tiny multiple threads unseen in the overall pattern, the knots on the underside of the carpet.

The moment of change is the only poem

There is nothing revolutionary whatsoever about the control of women's bodies by men. The woman's body is the terrain on which the patriarchy is erected.

The scars bear witness but whether to repair or to destruction I no longer know.

Not biology, but ignorance of ourselves, has been the key to our powerlessness

What kind of beast would turn its life into words?

Truthfulness, honor, is not something which springs ablaze of itself; it has been created between people.

You touched me in places so deep I wanted to ignore you

Silence can be a plan rigorously executed, the blueprint to a life, it is a presence, it has a history, a form. Do not confuse it with any kind of absence.

Most women have not even been able to touch this anger, except to drive it inward like a rusted nail.

We have lived with violence for so long.

This is my body, take it and destroy it

We have been raised to fear the yes within ourselves, our deepest cravings. And the fear of our deepest cravings keeps them suspect, keeps us docile and loyal and obedient, and leads us to settle for... many facets of our own oppression.

Every journey into the past is complicated by delusions, false memories, false namings of real events.

A language is a map of our failures.

The more I live the more I think two people together is a miracle.

Poetry is, among other things, a criticism of language.

How do you make it, all the way from here to morning?

An honorable human relationship--that is, one in which two people have the right to use the word "love"--is a process, delicate, violent, often terrifying to both persons involved, a process of refining the truths they can tell each other.

You grieve in loneliness, and if I understand you fuck in loneliness.

We write from the marrow of our bones.

The liar has many friends, and leads an existence of great loneliness

We must use what we have to invent what we desire.

William Styron Quotes

We're all in this game together.

In depression this faith in deliverance, in ultimate restoration, is absent. The pain is unrelenting, and what makes the condition intolerable is the foreknowledge that no remedy will come-not in a day, an hour, a month, or a minute.

It is hopelessness even more than pain that crushes the soul

We each devise our means of escape from the intolerable.

Reading--the best state yet to keep absolute loneliness at bay.

Judging whether life is or is not worth living amounts to answering the fundamental question of philosophy.

Let your love flow out on all living things.

Loss in all of its manifestations is the touchstone of depression--in the progress of the disease and, most likely, in its origin.

Kai Cheng Thom Quotes

I wanted to protect you, but I'm starting to think that the best thing you can do for people is teach them how to protect themselves. Every girl needs to be at least a little dangerous.

A sanctuary is a place where the door only locks from the inside.

Sometimes to be somebody else, you have to be nobody first.

You will be able to stop hurting people when you stop hurting yourself.

When you're a child trapped in a situation of physical or psychological depravation, you learn shame as an efficient, elegant mechanism of survival: shame simultaneously shields you from the reality that danger is out of your control (since the problem is not that you're unloved and deprived; it's that you're Bad) and prevents you from doing or saying anything challenging that might provoke a threat.

It's good for you to cry sometimes. Even if there isn't a reason.

When you live in a community of queers, anarchists, & activists, crisis is the baseline and stability an outlier.

You are mine like nothing has ever been before.

Safety is, I believe, an inherently classed, raced, and gendered experience that frequently runs the risk of being used for regressive ends--ironically, for restricting the freedoms of the vulnerable, those who are never really safe. Often, we see the call for safety actually reinforce the power of oppressive institutions, like the police and the prison system, in our lives. When we choose safety over liberation, our movements fail.

When they looked at me and my sister, even their love was hungry.

Some people will cling on to anything that makes them feel even a little bit free.

Forget, if you can, all the promises you've ever made and the lies that you've told.

Once you start hurting people, you can't stop

I feel tired. I don't want to be myself anymore.

Sometimes it's important to be alive.

Sometimes, there is nothing you can do but surrender.

You are always disappearing in the hope of being seen. You are always shrinking to fit into someone else's arms. You are collapsing ever inward, a galaxy to become smaller.

Gregory Orr Quotes

If we're not supposed to dance, why all this music?

Even hell is holy.

I was born with a knife in one hand and a wound in the other.

Maybe she loved me, maybe not--who knows? Not even the gods can see into a human heart--it's that dark.

Writing often reveals us to ourselves, lets us name what's important to us and what has been silent or silenced inside us.

And to live only once--what if that's not enough?

Maybe it was always simple: loss surrounds us. Who would deny it? We ourselves are loss, are lost.

I want to study the book of the world: every vanishing page.

The dead sing us songs I'm learning to answer.

[sagebodisattva]

Meta Q & A: Part 5 - Nobody Agrees

Meta Q and A, part five. Nobody agrees. So I got an email the other day, and the communication poses a plentitude of complex philosophical questions. So I’ll go ahead and read the missive in it’s entirety, then, after a brief cogitative entr’acte, will jump right in and start penetrating, responding to the query with concise meticulous exactitude. The message comes from an entity traveling under the moniker of “JunkFlex.” And the message goes as follows, quote:

JunkFlex: “Hello Meta Sage, I have been enjoying your channel off and on for a couple of years now. I do hope you have the time to communicate with me!

I go about my life with a small circle of people that I come into contact with. None of which are willing to agree with my viewpoint. I participated in a Wechsler Adult Intelligence Test in 2010, it was the 3rd version. The results were not normal. Everyone I try to communicate my viewpoint on existence either can't or won't grasp it, no matter how verbosely I explain myself.

This is what I’ve been saying to people:

"I am not convinced that anything exists because I do not believe that the substance of reality must adhere to my initial basic assumptions as a 'supposed' entity within it"

(That one is more cunning because it states something about myself and my own beliefs and they may be able to swallow it better by first seeing me in the predicament of my own viewpoint then possibly apply that viewpoint to themself on their own accord)

"Existence is but the preoccupation of the existence centric mindset.”

People constantly have to reference a snippet of scientific theory they have heard about or they simply knock on the table in front of them and say "then how can this happen?" others will say, "if I pinch you it will hurt", suggesting that my sensation of physical discomfort or pain is somehow evidence. Even though the further I think about this topic the blurrier the logic seems to get in my head, I am confident that I need very little information but rather only reasoning with a healthy touch of abstraction to get the answer. (It is like I am seeing a blurry version of the logical construct from behind textured glass). I guess this is why many people entering the realm of 'armchair philosophy' will disguise their ideas as questions. So to end this email I will spout a few of those questions for you.

Isn't 'infinite everything' a little too messy to be plausible?

Could the premise of existence be an 'immature' notion?

Why would our surroundings be as simple as we are?

Players of a game must adhere to the rules of the game but does the game also have to adhere to those same rules?

Could the purposelessness of everything be an indicator that it does not actually exist?

In closing I would just like to mention that I did watch your video on existentialism and nihilism and it was comforting for me to listen to. At the end however you said something about my viewpoint.

'Absurdism, Existentialism and Nihilism' 15 Jul 2016.

"And if you want to be stubborn and deny your own existence, then who, may I ask is making this denial?"

And my answer to your question is with my last question:

Can everything actually exist within nothing?

Kind regards,

Junkflex (David).”, unquote.

Hitherto, inquisitive communication. Hereafter, assiduous response. And right off the bat, before we go any further, I want to suspend and smite down a certain phrase that was used several times in this transmission. And that’s this term, “viewpoint.”

Quote:

“None of my friends are willing to agree with my viewpoint.”

“Everyone I try to communicate my viewpoint on existence either can't or won't grasp it.”

“They may be able to swallow it better by first seeing me in the predicament of my own viewpoint then possibly apply that viewpoint to themself on their own accord.”

“At the end however you said something about my viewpoint.”

Unquote.

Alright JunkFlex. I appreciate your interest in philosophy. It’s a good sign. It��s shows that you might have the aptitude to continue on and perhaps one day uncover the truth. But it’s gonna involve a little more then acquiring a “viewpoint.” Indeed, breaching the pass and crawling our way through the treacherous mountains of lies and deception, and finding the way out to total freedom, will involve the surrender of all viewpoints. For, you see, a “viewpoint”, is but personal intellectualism. All but mere thoughts and beliefs inside one’s head. An “opinion.” (Burp sound.) Narrating dialogue, that has absolutely no bearing on the actual truth, which, if all parties involved have surrendered their viewpoints, will never be in variation, and cannot be disagreed upon under any circumstance.

And that’s one of the world’s biggest problems right now. This stupid idea that all beliefs should be afforded equal station and respectability, irrespective of their inherent truth values. That we cannot discriminate against ideas that enable ones to choose to hide in a delusion. That we must expend great time and effort to protect and support everyone’s particular fantasy bubble. That important rights and responsibilities will be granted to those who refuse to participate in the truth, and stubbornly cling to falsehoods, even to the point of detriment and degradation to others. This is what you think we should be fighting to uphold?

So yeah, in case it managed to escape your attention. Nobody agrees. And that can’t be stated enough. It’s nice that they think that they’ve got that luxury, isn’t it? Or, how do they say? We agree to disagree! That’s it. You gotta love that one. We can agree to disagree. In other words: We can easily avoid the truth by all agreeing to disagree about which particular lies we are holding as beliefs. Isn’t that such an efficient use of freedom?

“We hold these truths to be self evident, that all lies men tell are created equal.”

Hey, nobody agrees. Except that we all agree to assume falsehoods, ANY falsehoods, over the acknowledgement of the fundamental truth. That’s the only thing we agree on, whole heartedly, but don’t ever bring this up. It’s an unconscious default, whose prevalence must be ignored in order to preserve it. It’s an unspoken rule of engagement, and you are not allowed to operate outside of it. Thus, it’s no real surprise that JunkFlex’s friends don’t agree with him about existence. Not that he’s taking any solid position about it, mind you. At least not with his first irresolution. Here, he’s basically just taking on the role of the skeptic; so there’s really not much for his friends to agree or disagree with; even though they would probably disagree with him anyway, even if he took a position. And why’s that? Because, once again, nobody agrees. And certainly nobody agrees about existence.

And that’s what this is basically about, isn’t it? Existence. It’s not a question of a universe or a god. Those are just ideas in your head. It’s a question of existence. What is existence, exactly. And how is this existence realized existentially. We want so badly for it to be attributable to something extrinsic, don’t we? Otherwise we might have to shoulder some responsibility, and we can’t have that, under any circumstance.

So we can’t expect to ever come to rightly understand the nature of existence if we can’t first establish the proper underlying foundation. And by “proper”, I mean what’s real and true; as opposed to an egoic delusion. That’s a huge difference. This is about embracing the undeniable base, unconditionally; not finding solace in a substitution; wherein you lie to yourself with some abstraction, attributing reality into an objectification, based on some literal interpretation of sensory perception.

Simply put, you can’t go anywhere until you’ve cultivated the clarity that reveals the context of reality to be the mind. Hence, while it’s good that you’re not convinced that anything exists because you do not believe that the substance of reality must adhere to your initial basic assumptions as a supposed entity within it, you should be sure not to let this uncertainty become an impediment to the truth of what’s always absolutely certain. What is the substance of reality? Seems you already suspect that it isn’t any assumed identity. And it seems you also suspect that it isn’t necessarily any object or environment with whom an assumed identity can interact. So if not any of these things, then what else can it be?

In answering, don’t think about it. You’ve made implications that you think you can arrive at truthful conclusions through reasoning and abstractions. Unfortunately, this couldn’t be further from the truth. The moment you contemplate, the game is already lost. The murky oppression of the overthinking brain always clouds up the crystal clear vision of pure crisp lucidity. All that needs be done, is to simply become aware; to awaken to reality as the full extent of what is actually always already the case. This brings us to the domain of the pure lucid mind. It’s not a god or a universe. It’s the mind. For, what else would be giving a universe or a god context?

You seem to come a bit closer to this realization with your latter proposition. That is, "Existence is but the preoccupation of the existence centric mindset.”

This is a useful observation; as long as you can resist the unconsciously engrained tendency to always seek to contextualize the field of the mind into some sort of objectification. You think an objectification is a solid, and the content of the mind is abstract, but, in fact, your idea of an objectification is abstract, and the very field of the mind is the true solid. This is a trap that most assumed identities fall into. Beyond the existence created within the imagination of a pure mind, what else would a supposed “entity”, initially assume about the substance of reality? Unfortunately, a whole lot. And this is how the matter becomes quickly misconstrued; as, you can’t rightfully explicate the substance of “existence”, if you are adopting an ideological stance upon a faulty premise. That’s why people think knocking on a table proves something, or that the pain that results from getting pinched is some indication of an objectification. Hence, this is exactly how matter itself also becomes misconstrued; as, the externalization mindset conditioning is hinged on an assumption that physicality is primary and that awareness is a byproduct. This is the foundation of mental slavery.

To keep the truth free and clear, you definitely don’t need logic; so it matters not how blurry or focused the logic becomes. Reality is the substance of pure mind, not an analytical tool used to create equations to be employed as symbolic representations of reality. And the same goes for accumulating information, sensible reasoning, or organizational abstractions. Ontology is concerned with study, and learning about what may exist when considered intellectually. None of that shit deals in the truth of the ontic; that is, the raw truth about what *is*.

And so, we’ve come to the part where you’ve implied the transmutation of your ideas into questions; thus, I will parse and dissect the inquires with systematic comprehensibility.

Question. Isn't 'infinite everything' a little too messy to be plausible?

Answer. It depends on what you mean. Although, I don’t think “messy”, would be the proper descriptor. Is “infinite everything”, plausible as an independently existing concrete physical configuration? Not really. A physical context cannot exist without boundaries, and if there are boundaries, “everything”, can’t be infinite. The mistake is to assume this idea of material objectivity. “Infinite everything”, is completely plausible in the imagination of the pure mind. It’s not that an “infinite everything”, is continually existing in some actual physical location, but that the raw potential for an infinite amount of anythings to manifest, always continually exists in a nowhere. You must come to understand the nuance of this difference.

Question. Could the premise of existence be an 'immature' notion?

Answer. It depends on what the premise is. Although, a premise itself implies the theoretical, which is already way off base. “Notions”, about reality, are not the reality. An “idea”, about existence, isn’t the existence. Is this intellectual practice immature? Certainly. It’s the most common tendency of the novice existential explorer. But the way to maturate out of this impetuous exercise, is to either quiet down the noise of the mind, or to create some space between the clarity of awareness and the noise of the mind. However you foster the break down of the mind’s attachment to the mind’s identity as the noise of the mind, doesn’t matter. As long as you can get the job done, one way or another. The noise of the mind doesn’t determine the sum of an existence. Existence isn’t a hypothesis. The field of the mind itself is the foundation of existence. There is an awareness of phenomena, and this in itself can be called the composition of an existence. It’s quite easy. Even easy peasy. It’s only when you start to formulate theories about the awareness of experience, that you begin to run into trouble.

Question. Why would our surroundings be as simple as we are?

Answer. Who’s “we?” And are “we”, located in surroundings? The issue here is misidentification. There isn’t any objectified surroundings, just as there isn’t any objectified identity. Both are equally illusion, and in this sense, might find an equivalence in their basic simplicity. A molecule, a tree, a rock, water, a biological form, a terrestrial body; all equally comprised of the same composition foundation: Illusion. What is aware of illusion?

Question. Players of a game must adhere to the rules of the game but does the game also have to adhere to those same rules?

Answer. The game provides the player a set of rules, so it would follow that the game would uphold it’s own rules. A game, to even be considered a game, must have framework, and whenever there is a framework, rules will apply. So yes, within a set of borders, there are settings that are going to be consistent, but it’s not really correct to ask if the game has to follow the rules, because the game isn’t a player. The game isn’t in a position to adhere, the game is in the position of provision. The game itself is a field of engagement, which, in this case, is strictly the field of the mind; not an objectified location.

Question. Could the purposelessness of everything be an indicator that it does not actually exist?

Answer. Everything is purposeless? Do you not find the purpose of things? Tell me if you can find purpose in any of these things. (Picture of objects.) Seems anything might serve a purpose, but “things” requires a subject to fulfill this capacity. So, wherein is the purposelessness of everything? But I know what you really mean. You imagine you are located in some cosmological spectrum called a universe, and your consciousness is but a speck of celestial byproduct, and the “universe” is the grand ultimate context, and is an infinite empty vastness, cold and impersonal, with no objective purpose to be found anywhere. And if only this were true, then you’d be completely right. But it isn’t true, because the universe isn’t a physical environment to be occupied by a physical creature. Everything that is apparently manifested does not actually exist, and there’s many indications of this. But a better re-phrase of the question would be: Is a lack of objective purpose an indication of the illusory nature of perceptual phenomena? Yes, and there are many clues available, pointing towards this. The key with this, is understanding what a term like “exist” refers to. Existence isn’t a locality. Existence is the dream of a locality, located in the pure mind. It’s not even located in the pure mind, but is the imagination of the pure mind itself.

And lastly.

Question. Can everything actually exist within nothing?

Answer. Everything doesn’t actually exist. There isn’t any actual objects. The truth, is that the entirety of the perpetual phenomena experience, that we call a “reality”, is all but an illusion of pure mind. Pure mind is your true identity. Pure mind is made out of nothingness.

Smoke on that.

[everyday-yogi]

BELOVED MASTER,

(Q) WHY CAN'T I SEE MY OWN FAULTS,

WHILE I AM IMMENSELY CAPABLE OF

SEEING OTHERS', EVEN THEIR SMALLEST ONES?

...”Prageeta, it is very normal. It is not something exceptional. Our eyes are focused on others; we are other-oriented.

We only see the others - it is not only a question of faults - we never see ourselves.

Even if we want to see ourselves we have to look in a mirror, we have to create the image. When the image is there the other has appeared. The mirror helps us to see ourselves because it creates the other.

Otherwise we are absolutely extroverts; we have forgotten the language of how to look in. Hence, as a consequence, you cannot see your own faults; nobody can.

The moment you start seeing your faults they start dropping like dry leaves. Then nothing else has to be done; to see them is enough.

Just to be aware of your faults is all that is needed. In that awareness they start disappearing, they evaporate.

One can go on committing a certain error only if one remains unconscious of it. Unconsciousness is a must to go on committing the same errors.

Even if you try to change you will commit the same error in some other form, in some other shape. And they come in all sizes and all shapes. You will exchange, you will substitute, but you cannot drop it because deep down you don't see that it is a fault. Others may be telling you because they can see.

That's why everybody thinks himself so beautiful, so intelligent, so virtuous, so saintly - - and nobody agrees with him!

The reason is simple: you look at others, you see their reality, and about yourself you carry fictions - beautiful fictions. About yourself you are very fictitious.

All that you know about yourself is more or less a myth; it has nothing to do with reality.

The moment one sees one's faults, a radical change sets in. Hence all the buddhas down the ages have been telling only one thing: awareness. They don't teach you character.

Character is taught by priests, politicians, but not by the buddhas. Buddhas teach you consciousness - not conscience.

Conscience is a trick played upon you by others. Others are telling you what is right and what is wrong; they are forcing their ideas upon you.

And they go on forcing them from your very childhood, when you were so innocent, so vulnerable, so delicate, that there was a possibility to make any impression on you, any imprint on you.

They have conditioned you from the very beginning. That conditioning is called conscience and that conscience goes on dominating your whole life.

Conscience is a strategy of society to enslave you.

Buddhas teach consciousness.

Consciousness means you are not to learn from others what is right and what is wrong; there is no need to learn from anybody.

You have simply to go in; just the inward journey is enough. The deeper you go, the more consciousness is released.

When you reach the center you are so full of light that darkness disappears. When you bring light into your room you don't have to push the darkness out of the room. The presence of the light is enough because darkness is only an absence of light. So are all your insanities, madnesses.

But everybody can see others' faults, so don't be worried about it, Prageeta. This is the situation in which everybody is living.

...”

The moment you know you are mad you are no longer mad. That's the only criterion of sanity.

The moment you know you are ignorant you have become wise.

The Oracle at Delphi declared Socrates the most wise man on the earth. A few people rushed to Socrates and they told him, "Be pleased, rejoice: the Oracle at Delphi has declared you the wisest man in the world."

Socrates said, "That is all nonsense. I know only one thing: that I know nothing."

The people were puzzled and confused. They went back to the temple, they told the Oracle, "You say that Socrates is the wisest man in the world, but he himself denies it.

On the contrary, he says he is utterly ignorant. He says he knows only one thing: that he knows nothing."

The Oracle laughed and said, "That's why I have declared him the wisest man in the world, the greatest wise man in the world. That's why - precisely because he knows that he is ignorant."

Ignorant people believe they are wise. Insane people believe they are the sanest.

Yes, Prageeta, it happens; it is part of human nature that we go on looking to the outside.

We watch everybody except ourselves. Hence we know more about others than about ourselves; we know nothing about ourselves.

We are not witnesses to our own functioning of the mind, we are not watchful inside.

You need a hundred-and-eighty-degree turn - that's what meditation is all about.

You have to close your eyes and start watching. In the beginning you will find only darkness and nothing else.

And many people become frightened and rush out because outside there is light. Yes, there is light outside but that light is not going to enlighten you, that light is not going to help you at all.

You need inner light, a light which has its source in your very being, a light which cannot be extinguished even by death, a light which is eternal. And you have it, the potential is there!

You are born with it, but you are keeping it behind you; you never look at it.

And because for centuries, for many lives, you have looked outside, it has become a mechanical habit.

Even when you are asleep you are looking at dreams. Dreams mean reflections of the outside. When you close your eyes you again start daydreaming or thinking; that means again you become interested in others. This has become such a chronic habit that there are not even small intervals, small windows into your own being from where you can have a glimpse of who you are.

In the beginning it is a hard struggle, it is arduous, it is difficult - but not impossible. If you are decisive, if you are committed to inner exploration, then sooner or later it happens. You just have to go on digging, you have to go on struggling with the darkness. Soon you will pass the darkness and you will enter into the realm of light.

And that light is true light, far truer than the light of the sun or the moon, because all the lights that are outside are temporal; they are only for the time being.

Even the sun is going to die one day. Not only do small lamps exhaust their resources and die in the morning, even the sun with such an immense resource is dying every day. Sooner or later it will become a black hole; it will die and no light will come from it. Howsoever long it lives it is not eternal. The inner light is eternal; it has no beginning, no end. It is synonymous with God.

And I am not interested in telling you to drop your faults, to make yourself good, to improve your character - no, not at all. I am not interested in your character at all; I am interested only in your consciousness.

Become more alert, more conscious. Just go deeper and deeper into yourself till you find the center of your being.

You are living on the periphery, and on the periphery there is always turmoil. The deeper you go, the deeper the silence that prevails.

[smittenbysizablesinners-blog]

About Me

Name: Ronnie (Ron/Ronn or Ronnster is an okay substitute) | I also go by Tequila sometimes. (or Tequi for short). So that would leave ~5 suitable names to address me by! I have no preferences out of them.

Age: in my 20s (probably older than you :P)

Sex+Gender: CisFemale Sexuality: Heteromantic Pansexual (*maybe* more on demiromantic range in romantic-ness... or i’m just super awkward/easily entertained. maybe all of the above, haha) Height: 5′5″ (i don’t rp as myself really so it’s not like this info is relevant. lol. i wish i wasn’t quite as tall.. like being like 4′11 - 5′2 would have been nice... but i’m under 5′6″, albeit just barely, so that’s good at least i s’pose..) Ethnicity: Italian/Eastern European/English/German (+small bit of Turkish) American (basically Caucasian but I have a dark skin tone for a caucasian - olive skin from my Southern Italian and Eastern European (Slavic) [plus that tiny bit of Turkish in me] heritage). I’m technically Jewish as well as my mom’s mom’s mom (my great grandma) was Jewish and so on, but my grandma and mother were raised Catholic, and my dad was raised Catholic so I was raised Catholic (before I left the church as a teen / around 9th grade i left. Shortly after being confirmed in reality, ahaha xD;) Job: Unemployed atm *sobs* but sometimes i help friends or family with odds and ends for money. i used to do colouring commissions (digital). But I usually too to long and would end up feeling guilty about that so i stopped... And now I’m busier than before so I’d like to create content on my own terms with the free time i have. i’m also a student again. Psychology was a mistake. Now going for a International Politics/Studies/Relatioins | Global Peacekeeping degree and my goal is either to do something for state department or work for a non profit or something. I don’t aim to be rich and super successful. Simply being safe, happy, and satisfied is good enough for me. Though perhaps this stunts my motivation towards bettering myself (through good work ethic and stuff. i’m kind of a procrastinating potato person). Likes: G/t (hence having two G/t blogs; G/t is giant/tiny. if you aren’t cool w/ that then idk why you are here??? this blog is for G/t. Not necessarily sfw stuff either. This blog is NC-17+! (so if you are 16 or younger gtfo); I also like everything International - cultures; politics; languages ; architecture; art; FOOD :9 ; places; fauna; I LOVE CELEBRATING THE DIVERSITY OF THIS PLANET  TTvTT ; I’m  a rather liberal person socially, politically and so on. I will never be okay with bigotry of any kind. And I will not tolerate it. Nor bullying. Uhm. Let’s see. i’m kinda sorta socialist and thus kinda have some disdain towards capitalism I’m pro-choice but I hope that you have a good reason for it and not just because “it feels better w/o the condom”; if your all about that, i’d suggest maybe female condoms - though a little wonky at first - they allow for more sensation on both sides. They also can be used as ‘dental dams’. And i’m fairly certain they are free  w/ most insurances. And they can be put in and stay in for hours before use - so you (if female) good go out and have fun and hook up and not ruin the heat of the moment by condom putting on and stuff. Just saying. (hey this IS a nsfw blog, might as well give some nsfw advice haha.) I’m agnostic though I’m sorta leaning towards atheism. I’m just do paranoid/unsure of everything to totally discount religion/a higher being/etc. I just  sorta seriously doubt it. I am not fond of how religion has affected this planet now and throughout the past. But I can’t deny there are benefits to being religious and don’t hold it against people for being religious nor do i blame certain religions for the world’s problems. And Islamophobia, Antisemitism and anything anti-religion in such ways as the two before mentioned things counts as bigotry in my book and if you recall i don’t tolerate bigotry of any kind! I think the world kind sucks because people kinda suck in general, haha. I will never judge anyone personally. I may feel on the inside personal/hurt/angry feels, but I will do my best not to let it cloud my judgement of anyone permanently and it would take a LOT of hate and harassment for me to block anyone. I don’t like blocking people. I feel that is sorta like denying a person’s existence and sorta says ‘you aren’t worthwhile as a person’. And you have to be a total all-encompassing shithead for me to think that. That being said, I know some people with block very easily and my blog just being nsfw content-friendly would lead to blocking. a message stating why you are blocking me - especially if it’s nothing personal - would be nice, however, as I’m a VERY PARANOID person. Speaking of paranoia. I’m mentally ill. This is really  why I write and/or talk a lot. It is a habit out of nerves and awkwardness. And my poor attention span makes long conversation hard - barring if going off into tangets is okay. I will do that a lot. I have one mode and that mode is stream of conciousness. I know my use of many many words can be annoying. Trust me. I know. Please don’t harass me about it. If it truly makes you anxious, reach out to me, and I will try hard to be more concise when reblogging you or if ever addressing you. That is if you’d feel comfortable asking me this. I may not block people easily, but that doesn’t mean won’t. And that’s just a reality that I have to live with. I accept this. But yeah, basically if I upset you in anyway, let me know! I am always trying to better myself. The hardest thing for me would be to not ramble. If it’s something like a certain topic or word bothers you. And I’m currently not tagging it. Let me know. I’m gonna try and be super diligent (and not so rambly) with tags on this particular blog at the very least. though i should do that on every blog tbh...) Anyways, back to being mentally ill. I have Bipolar Disorder Type II (maybe, that is. just switched psychiatrists and my new one things I may just have regular general depressive disorder as my “up” moments are very infrequent and all I really do is be more impulsive/talkative/jittery/etc than usual... and my mood tends to be good when ‘up’.. too bad it comes with the loss of common sense. I don’t do anything physically dangerous though. Worst would be buying something expensive and stupid for no good reason. I’ve done that a few times. 0/10 would recommend, haha. I also have OCD (which is like useless. it gives me extreme focus, but mostly with dumb things - lists, aphabetizing things, researching stuff on the Internet, basically the only good thing is that I can research like a boss, though bad thing is that i end up spending way too much time researching and over do it... I already mentioned my anxiety awhile back, but I’ve been diagnosed with both General Anxiety Disorder and Social Anxiety Disorder (i can practically be agoraphobic sometimes and have reculsive spells both online and off - which is why i probably will disappear at some point. maybe i’d come back. maybe i wouldn’t. and if i come back, it could be years before i do. i don’t know so you definitely wouldn’t know so puh-lease do not get attached to me ;___; G/t stuff: The truth is - I mostly like fluff and nice, kind, sfw stuff. At least as a viewer. As I content creator, I like to experiment and broach all kinds of topics, some sensitive. I will have characters that are genuinely bad people. Often I like dark characters that go through some sort of redemption. But I’ve toyed with doing something that is akin to ‘the making of a villain’ where a character starts out benevlent and than after going through some stuff, becomes malicious, perhaps downright evil even... a loss of self maybe have ocurred. I am not shy in having characters with imperfections, but in a realistic way that isn’t bad. I mean, it’s not ideal, but it happens. like blindness or a missing limb. many scars. mental illnesses are frequent in my characters and sometimes in a criminally insane way. However, I aim to reflect reality in such sort of topics, so of course criminally insane characters would be a very small minority compared to perfectly safe mentally ill characters. But, in any case, as I said, I plan on using extensive tags this blog WILL have (some) VORE. But it is NOT the focus of the blog and I don’t really draw vore - well i haven’t really done so yet... And in writing, I tend to making a horror element. Though I am somewhat fond of  “safe” (platonic or not) vore.. I’m rather confused about it and have a hard time considering plausible within my own content. So in my writing it would be fatal and not with any main characters of anything...mostly just poor SOBs and such... Basically, it would be quality content for the vore community as it would likely portray vore as despicable and wrong. As, in a real life scenario, that would be a correct assumption. These would be worlds w/o safe vore (barring i guess immediate puking, but i’m actually kinda disturbed/freaked by things vomit-related. So I’m not sure i’d be able to write that... Maybe i could. It’s just RL vomit that causes me to panic and cry. Drawn stuff or written stuff, as long as it’s not too descriptive or realistic doesn’t really bother me, though i’m not sure i’d say i like it.). Some vore stuff actually upsets me. But thing with me is, I never know when something is going to upset (aka make me cry/angry/uncomfortable/panicky) or whatever, so I just live with any unfortunate run ins with feels as it happens and then move on. Unless, I feel it is condoning a poor behavior and gives a message that is not in line with what you (the writer) indicates it is, then I’ll just nothing. And if i do say something, it won’t be in a hostile way, it would just be hey, x action actually kinda indicates y because of z. just thought i’d let you know if interpretations of this that reflects what i just by readers would bother you. if not, or if you disagree, than that’s cool too. I was just staying that just in case that would bother you and thus maybe you’d want to change things. but it’s totally your decision and i’m not pushing either way. blah blah some rambling because i’m trying not be offending while likely saying things that may offend. I have a hard time not being blunt and firm with my words. So basically take anything I say with a grain of salt. Sometimes I open my mouth when i shouldn’t. If I made you upset, just let me know what i did and why it upset you and i’ll apologize (within reason. like if you were a jerk and i was just like ‘oh stop that shit already’, i’m not gonna say sorry if you were legitmately being a jerk. but otherwise, i’m quick to say ‘sorry’. i’m always saying sorry. sometimes i’m wanting to say sorry but i’m too anxious too. so keep that in mind as well. Uhm. I like M/f and M/m content the most. F/f is p. cool too. Poly Relations that mixes M/m, M/f and/or F/f are cool too (all types of combos as long as there are no “m” with a “F”...not to knock on that, just isn’t my thing.. So yeah, as I hinted, i’m noot really a fan of F/m.. and I’m not gonna make much content with that (though i do have a canon F/m pairing in one of my worlds/series/story/idk what to call it. don’t expect much of them though.). But in all honest, there’s a lot of F/m stuff out there and my content isn’t mediocre at best so it’s not really a loss to the F/m community that i’m not doing much of that.Also, please don’t request content. I may see on your blog at some point you wish there was ‘x’ and/or ‘y’ content and this may prompt me to write or draw something like that. but it might not either. In a nutshell, I do what I what when I want. I know that’s kinda selfish but that mindset - when in connection with just leisure activities keeps me sane!You can ask any question. I just might not answer. If I’m not gonna answer, I respond with something random. And I’m unlikely to respond with drawings. Too much effort. Sorry.In theory, I’d like to RP. But I’m just not the right kind of person for a serious RP. i’d only want to do a detailed, literate story RP and i’d only be able to do like one respond a day - if that. So it’s kinda a waste of someone’s time to RP with me.  And I think I’d just prefer to write drabbles/one-shots or draw my characters or whatever. I don’t give my characters enough love. They kind just sorta chill in my mind not doing anything a vast majority of the time, haha xD So long story short, I’m not RPing currently. Sorry. And if/when I RP, I am not myself. I separate my interest/fantasy of G/t with my reality. Just trying to keep sane. Not trying to knock on people whom identify as a giant or tiny or whateverIDK what else to say. Probably am missing important stuff, while writing too much frivolous stuff, heh... I’ll probably edit this every now and that ^^

[sagebodisattva]

The Framework of Absurdism

So just prior to the release of my last video, “Overcoming Absurdism”, I coincidently received correspondence from a user going under the handle of “Comrade Punikki”, who made a few new comments on an old video; an exposition from last year, entitled: “Absurdism, Existentialism and Nihilism”… Now that “Overcoming Absurdism” is published, and seeing as how the new comments are conveniently on topic, I will now turn to address these inquires, and perhaps clarify some lingering questions that may be left unanswered. First, I will read a transcript of the exchange, as it happened, then return afterwards to address some relevant points in summation.

So the comment exchange went as follows:

Comrade Punikki: Camus didn’t ask us to imagine Sisyphus depressed. I think you’re misrepresenting absurdists here. Yes, they begin by seeing the Absurd as undesirable or as a source of pain but if they choose to accept it, as Camus encourages, they find the lack of objective meaning liberating. Correct me if I’m wrong but your description of existential nihilism sounds like absurdism to me.

Meta Sage: I think Camus didn’t clarify the details as as he could have. “Absurdism” is more a description of a period of tribulation, then it is a destinational position to assume. Until one can clearly identify and accept the intrinsic nature to the functionality of meaning, one will remain alienated from the truth, which really can’t be all that liberating… for it can lead to underlying assumptions of materialism, which can end up supplanting the void left by the removal of god and become a substitute objective delusion.

I think to suspend oneself in Absurdism, rejecting the objective, while also not gaining intimacy with the subjective, will have a predominantly negative effect on the journeyman. Hence, the latter position of existentialism is introduced, which is a more suitable position to find ground upon after the existential crisis that follows the death of god.

Comrade Punikki: Perhaps I’m a simpleton but I fail to see how metaphysical materialism could substitute God as the source of meaning. I rejected God long ago as a kid but that didn’t cause me much existential dread, rather it was the disillusionment with society and all it’s Sisyphean tasks that caused me angst as a teenager. I think in one of your videos you said that the lack of objective meaning shouldn’t be a problem for atheists. Well I agree if you take atheism to it’s logical conclusion. But like you said in this video, the starting point is a crowded area. I don’t think it’s metaphysical materialism from which these people derive meaning but rather economic materialism, culture, and ideology (at least this was the case for me). I never derived any meaning from my materialist outlook, at least consciously. I’m not being willingly ignorant because I find bliss in ignorance. I’d like to understand metaphysical nihilism and I watched your video on it but it went right over my head. So maybe I really am a simpleton. And I’m not necessarily disagreeing with you here, it’s just that my understanding of nihilism, absurdism, and existentialism is different from yours. Maybe I’ve misread Camus all this time. “Absurdism” to my understanding is not just a description of a period of tribulation as you put it. It’s the philosophy of recognizing the Absurd (the period of tribulation) and then accepting it (as opposed to suicide or philosophical suicide) and thus becoming an “absurd hero” (overcoming the Absurd without denying it). This to me entails complete lucidity of the lack of objective meaning while also “gaining intimacy with the subjective”, not by constructing meaning as the existentialist does but by “rebelling” against the Absurd. Choosing to enjoy the ride, finding joy despite our Sisyphean “fates”.

Meta Sage: Not sure where you got metaphysical materialism from, but I was referring to just plain ole materialism; which facilitates a lot of unconscious meaning to an individual; usually through “naturalistic” avenues, or similarly with ideologies such as secular humanism. This provides objective meaning in the form of a scientific understanding of an external universe that seemingly produces creatures that have inherent meanings in line with nature, and the cultures therein: hunting, gathering, child bearing, ect… Your description of the absurdist that does not employ existentialism does sound more nihilistic; as there has been a negation of a purportedly important aspect of life with no attempt to replace it. This is when one navigates existence without the need for ANY meaning, and this will generally be considered to err more on the side of nihilism.

Comrade Punikki: Well materialism is a bit of a vague term that can mean totally different things depending on the context. What I mean by materialism is that there is an objective world that is the cause of our phenomenal experience. That includes the idea that consciousness arises (I’m inclined to think functionalism or some variation of it is the most likely explanation) from matter and the complex interactions of it in the brain. Still I don’t externalize my “responsibility” by denying free will or otherwise. As I understand it, we both agree that our experience of the world is a projection but we disagree on the source of it. You talk about pure potentiality which I don’t understand whereas I think that the source is ultimately whatever it is that is the most fundamental component of the objective world (vibrating stings, energy, some fundamental particle, whatever it may be). Now I realize that atoms and molecules are merely abstractions and such abstractions aren’t “real” or rather don’t reflect reality as it truly is. For me, this doesn’t provide any sense of individual meaning thru trying to understand the world or otherwise. I reject any naturalistic ideas about meaning in the universe such as child bearing (I’m an antinatalist) or survival for the sake of survival. Absurdism is nihilistic in the sense that there’s no disagreement between absurdists and nihilists. Indeed I’ve always viewed absurdism as a subcategory of nihilism. Nihilism as I’ve understood it has been a neutral position to take. It deals with matters of fact (All values and meaning is subjective, there’s no inherent meaning etc) whereas existentialism, absurdism, and pessimism are “applied” nihilism or the result of humans relating to the nihilistic worldview, adjusting to it, interpreting it. But where existentialism rejects the core idea of nihilism by, in my opinion, committing philosophical suicide by constructing meaning, absurdism and pessimism stay true to the nihilistic worldview. And while the existentialist would agree that no objective meaning exists, they are content with creating their own meaning which the pessimist and absurdist reject as anchoring, isolation, distraction, or as philosophical suicide.

Meta Sage: Thinking about it more deeply, I mostly like and agree with your descriptions of Absurdism. In a sense, Absurdism is born the moment god dies… and a subject could go in a number of different directions from here. But I still assert that many choose to shield themselves from the absurdist truth by taking refuge in the lie of materialism. So, to really get down to the meat and bones of the matter, the truth of absurdity itself must be examined contextually. This is where it is shown that the truth of absurdity is conditional and falsifiable, hence really illusory; which can’t be called a truth. There’s no truth to objectivity in a godless world either! If there really is no such thing as objectivity in any sense, then this proves materialism is a lie. Hence, the vibrations that are referred to as “existing states”, are really only the contents of mental phenomena, which is composed of a perception of an experience, that is then called a reality. The perplexity of the absurd is wisked away with lucidity; as the absurd quality of existence in a dream is part of a dream’s nature.

Comrade Punikki: Wow this is a lot to think about. But I still fail to see how materialism, as I define it in this context, is denying the absurd “truth” if there is such a thing.

End of dialogue.

So that was the comment exchange. So now, I’d like to address some of the points made in the latter part of the communication, and then tie things together into something cohesive.

While Albert Camus has made some great ideological contributions to these philosophical considerations, some of his complaints are unnecessary caveats, and could only be concluded as such by, just as was the case with Nietzsche, choosing to assume the erroneous premise of materialism. Camus encouraged us to embrace the absurd as it is, and not seek to dilute the immediacy of it through any evasive measures. But why? To become an absurd hero by rebelling against the absurd by refusing to commit suicide? Whatever for? Just for the sake of survival? To live an existence in spite of a imposing paradigm of questionable equity? This proposition assumes an actual existence of a paradigm! This is the externalization of absurdism.

Camus also rejects existentialism on the basis that it deludes one from the absurdist truth and also fills one up with passion, that could contribute to a premature death, hence resulting in one less absurd hero living in rebellion of the absurd by not dying. But again, whatever for? Lucidity involves realizing the mind created production of dream experiences altogether, not in just refusing the divine but then maintaining the delusion of the dream world as a mind independent materiality. Live or commit suicide, it doesn’t matter. Nothing is existing to live or die. Maybe an appearance of a form undergoes some superficial changes, but that’s about it. One hundred millions births and deaths, and not one bit of the essence has ever gone anywhere. There is no absurd hero, and there is no absurd paradigm existing. These are all just abstractions.

The problem with Absurdism, despite it’s bravery and willingness to confront an apparent existential conundrum, is that it continues to make the same old mistake, despite it’s impressive progress in other areas. When I spoke of the atheist taking refuge in materialism to circumvent the absurdist truth, it means the denial of idealism, which is the only avenue towards addressing the context of absurdity, rather then just focusing strictly on the content of the absurd, with a false presupposition that materiality is objective… To clarify it more precisely, it isn’t really so much a matter of materialism denying the absurd truth, so much as it is a case of materialism denying the ultimate falsehood of the conditional truths of absurdity. That seems to be the problem here. You can’t be half assed about the rejection of objectivity. If you have tossed out all objective notions of god and the divine, you must also toss out all objective notions of nature and the universe. The reason why objectivity is a lie, is because illusion, what we like to call reality, is interconnected with the mind. That’s what this is all about. It’s not just about rejecting the idea of an external being casting judgement… it’s about rejecting the whole idea of external entirely. Nature and the universe are no different. They are no less of an idea derived from the inputs of sensory perception. Nice images on the screen, to be sure, but no more existing independently from the mind then the grand ole sky daddy. Any notion of an existing state, in fact, does not exist independently of the mind that perceives it. Therefor, the source of what we call reality cannot be a material; matter, liquid, gas, elementary particle, energy, or otherwise… Not even vibrating strings… even though that is a fantastic abstraction!

If one is lucid, one has clarity to the fact that absurdity is the canvas of illusion, and that illusion is a mental phenomena. This is the epiphany that is hoped to be realized. You not only have to endure the death of god, but also the death of the material universe. And until one can do that, the true nature of the absurd dream will remain shrouded in delusion.