#he's so broken as Hwi

[mctna2019]

Bloods

"Come to my father's house." Seon-ho knew Hwi's handwriting. so he went there. probably this would be punishment or revenge. well, Seon-ho had no resistance to it. in fact, maybe that was right thing. Hwi is standing in front of the wooden stool in the middle of the yard. right next to the blood stain on it that only he and Seon-ho knew the origin of, a painful secret. he looks angry and Seon-ho knows better than anyone that anger makes him more powerful but blind. +why you wanted from me to come here? Hwi puts the arrow in the bow and holds it in front of Seon-ho's chest. Seon-ho doesn't move. -I lost everything because of your damn father. Seon-ho stares him. -now I'm a dead person. so I'm not afraid of anything. my sister is dead... because of your father. Hwi shouts and Seon-ho is just like a mountain that reflects Hwi's voice back to itself. -you said we had a deal. his voice trembles a little. -I couldn't protect Yeon, like a coward man. Seon-ho can see the tears behind the flames in his eyes. his hands tremble like his voice, like his body, like Seon-ho's world. he shouts as if something would be change by doing this and it would go back to the past. -say something. you were responsible too. she loved you. +shoot. finally Seon-ho breaks silence. Hwi draws the bow more. Seon-ho moves forward so that the sharp point of the arrow lands on his chest and scratches his clothes and skin. before Hwi can take a step back, Seon-ho grabs him by the collar and pulls him towards himself. +do you want to kill me to take revenge on my father? or from me? do it, although it doesn't matter to him, at least you make me comfortable. shoot Hwi. Hwi looks at the red wet stain on Seon-ho's chest. he wants to put the bow down but Seon-ho doesn't let him. if they came to this point so they both have to continue. -what are you doing right now? Seon-ho heard Hui-jae's angry and worried voice as Hwi could see her. she comes near them quickly and with seeing the bow on Seon-ho's chest her fear is more. -Hwi isn't well now. he's wounded. Seon-ho lets go of Hwi's collar. Hwi lowers the bow, because of his physical weakness or fear. and he has to pull out the arrow that had injured Seon-ho's chest. Hui-jae stares at the wound with terrified look. -in this situation, how can you... +yes, since I'm like my father and cause death to those around me, I asked Hwi to kill me before him. maybe no one will die from now on. this wasn't sarcasm. it was just the buried words that Seon-ho was pouring out. Hwi doesn't say anything as Hui-jae doesn't react. -your father should be kill. Hui-jae said that then she takes Hwi's arm gently and Hwi walks with her like walking Dead. he stops for a moment and clutched his bow in anger and pain as he looks at Seon-ho's eyes. -I'll kill your father myself. in the worst possible way. he left, along with Hui-jae. Seon-ho slowly sits down on the wooden stool. he puts his hand on his chest. it isn’t a deep wound, but there's something more painful behind it. then he runs his fingers over the trail of blood, as if touching something precious and lost. but he doesn't notice that his hand was bloody and his own fresh blood is smeared over Yeon's old blood.

.............

I didn't want to write this. there was supposed to be something between Hwi and Seon-ho before Yeon's death. but it was dragged here. sorry.

[nokhwa]

I'm on ep. 10 rn, and unless what he said to haeryung was actually about gicheol, I just don't think junmo ever cared for gicheol as friend. None of his actions or monologues indicate it.

[avochele]

I don't understand but I love you.

Request: TNX's reaction to you speaking in your native language - @dangerousmoonkitten

Pairing: TNX x gn!reader

Warning: none (please tell me if there are any, so I can add them)

Tags: fluff

note: i'm sorry for letting you guys wait for so long for an update. i'm in my finals right now and didn't really feel motivated to write. i hope you like it and don't always take life too seriously you guys.

STREAM FUEGO

Taehun

The both of you are invited to your cousins birthday. So it was no surprise that at some point you started speaking in your native language with your family. Taehun was amazed by the speed with what you started translating for him. At one point he stopped listening to your translations by how much he was admiring you. You teased him about it later.

Kyungjun

You were talking to one of your friends over the phone, when he heard you. He was confused at first because he didn't know if you were speaking in english or in your native language. You were in fact speaking both. You were sitting in the kitchen while he was laying on the couch with his laptop in front of him. So in order to be able to listen to you he turned his music on his headphones down. He loved listening to you speaking in your native language.

Hyunsoo

Your date had been crushed by your mom asking if you could babysit your babysister. So now the two of you were sitting on the floor, trying to entertain a toddler. At some point you had switched to your native language to talk to your sister. Since then Hyunsoo has been sitting on the floor with a toy in his hand just looking at you with sparkling eyes. You excused yourself for a second to get you something to drink. „Your pretty“ he suddenly hears in broken korean from your sister. He smiles at her. His date didn't get ruined at all.

Junhyeok

You were watching a series in your native language and you just couldn't get over how oblivious the main character was. You talked to your friend about it before, and now you started recording a voice message to said friend with Junhyeok listening in on it. You were talking fast and he had no clue what you were talking about. But he knew that it was the prettiest thing he had ever heard. (Next to your laugh and voice in general.) „What?“ you asked as you finished, you had caught him starring. „Nothing.“ he says. Little did you know his heart was racing.

Hwi

Your grandparents had invited you to dinner, forcing you to bring your boyfriend with you. So now you were sitting at the table with an enormous amount of food infront of you. Your grandpa had started to talk to Hwi in a very broken Korean, leaving you to talk to your grandma. As the hours passed Hwi started to listen to your conversation. He understood not even half of it but just listening to you made his day better. He made a mental note to learn your language later.

Sungjun

Being bilingual isn't easy sometimes and Sungjun completely understood that. But when you just started talking to him in your native language he didn't quite know what to do. So he just let you talk. Even though he didn't understand a word. He was always fascinated at how well you spoke both languages. “It would be great if you could say everything one more time in korean.“ You stopped smiling. You swear you saw him on Duolingo a few days later.

[dreamingkdrama]

Relationship analysis

Seo Hwi x Yi Bang Won

This dynamics between Hwi and Bang Won is very intetesting an for me it was one of the top things I liked about this show. Yet, there are still some unanswered questions. So lets take a closer look at this relantionship.

Hwi and Bang Won meet for the first time in episode 6. Hwi is unvoluntarily in service of Nam Jeon at this time. Nam Jeon is Bang Won's political opponent and he wants to use Hwi as a spy. However, Hwi has his own plan and he wants to use Bang Won for revenge on Nam Jeon for everything bad he has done to him and his sister. Hwi and Bang Won meet at a hunt where Hwi shows his archery skills. Bang Won is impressed not only by Hwi's skills but also his very immediate behavior.

However, Bang Won is smart and very suspicious. He sees through Hwi's plan to get to his favour and he order to beat him. He asks Hwi who sent him and he doesn't believe him when Hwi claims he is just a hunter. It's  clear that Bang Won likes him from the start, but he don't trust him and he would kill him if Seon Ho didn't come to save him at this moment.

Hwi is playing dangerous game, but Bang Won finally give him the chance. It takes them some time to start to trust each other and there are always some doubts and hidden secrets.

The breaking point is when Nam Jeon orders Hwi to assasinate Bang Won, but Hwi makes a plan how to save him. From this point, there is clear shift in their relationship. There is more trust and respect.

It seems to me that there is always some hidden doubt if the trust is truly mutual.

They save each other...

...they fight together...

...they start to understand their motivations and internal struggles....

They are both very loyal, but I can feel there some kind of fear that this attachment has an expiration date. Towards the end of the story, there are some cracks in the so far solid wall of friendship. It's quite obvious how they like each other. Hwi definitely respect Bang Won a lot and share most of his visions. He is also very grateful for everything Bang Won has done for him. Bang Won's affection always seemed much deeper. He definitelly respects Hwi, but I think he really likes him for who he is, he admires him and has a soft spot for him. When their alliance starts to fall apart, he looks very sad about that.

You can really say that he is heartbroken and he is grieving over loosing someone who was probably the closest person he has. He know's that when the time comes, Hwi will choose Seon Ho over him. I would even say there is jealousy of unrequired love, but that would be just speculation. To be fair, it was mostly Bang Won's actions that forced Hwi to go against him and he knew it will end this way (it was also partially because of Hwi's unheathy friendship with Sron Ho). But Bang Won always prioritize his visions over his feelings.

The story of Hwi and Bang Won is a tragedy. Hwi promises that he will forget everything, leave and never come back if Bang Won spare Seon Ho's life and Bang Won agrees. But then things change and Hwi realise that his people will never be safe if he and Seon Ho will be a thread for Bang Won. So the two of them go to Bang Won and sacrifice themselfs for Bang Won's promise that he won't kill anyone else.

The ending is so sad, but kind of poetic. It's really tragic to watch how two young men die for nothing. And how one man sacrifice everything to win a throne and then he lives full of guilt and with broken heart for the rest of his life.

[laireshi]

For the fandom ask meme: DMBJ, 5 & 12 (Xiaoge and/or Heiping). And MCTNA, same questions. 😁👍

Thanks for asking, @eirenical ❤

DMBJ

5) Who is your favourite character

Um. Okay I have to make a confession. I know it's surprising and I don't mention it that often, but... It's Xiaoge. He's everything to me ;;; He's had such a terrible life and he remains so GOOD. And he's a little ball of trauma and never prioritizes himself ;;;; he needs hugs and love and whump.

12) favourite hc for a ship/character

Xiaoge: he's got so many scars. He doesn't remember where most of them come from, and looking at some others, he's left feeling as if his body was someone else's really. They're long faded by now -- decades must've passed. It's only rarely he strips completely and presses on the scars as if they were old bruises instead.

Heiping: Xiazi can read Xiaoge pretty well and have full conversations with him where he's the only one speaking, but sometimes he pretends he doesn't understand his Yaba and picks the most ridiculous things he thought Xiaoge wanted to say, just to pull his leg, and makes it a game to see what will make Xiaoge react beyond rolling his eyes fondly.

MCTNA

5) Who is your favourite character

NAM SEON-HO MY BELOVED 😭😭😭😭😭 He's tailor-made just for me! The tragedy, the angst, how nice he looks covered in blood and crying! His whole "Hwi will hate me for it, but at least he will be alive to do so, so it's all right" 😭 He's so good at making himself the villain. Also he's a depressed broken mess, I love him.

12) favourite hc for a ship/character

...I'm pretty sure it's canon that deep down, at the worst of it, Seon-ho hoped Hwi would kill him and so he could die near his best friend 😭

(for this meme)

[river-r1t3s]

So, after my last post, I kept thinking about it, so I wrote this:

THAT'S IT!?!

Enjoy 😁

The members of ab6ix were all in the practice room together, preparing for their next comeback. Daehwi had been struggling against his allergies all day. He hadn't said anything, but the others heard him constantly sniffling. Fighting to keep the sneezes from coming out. "Hwi? You good?" Woong asked, getting a bit irritated by the maknae's sniffling. Daehwi nodded, he didn't want to speak, his nose so sensitive that just talking made him feel like sneezing. "Just sneeze. I think we all know you need to" Donghyun lightly scolded the maknae. Daehwi was slightly embarrassed, but also grateful his hyungs called him out because he honestly wasn't sure how much longer he could hold back his sneezes.

"HhtCChiUH- hhktCHiUHh- hhktcHHuih-kkTchUh- hhktChuHH- hhh- hh-ktchEW"

"Bless you" the members said, Daehwi thanked them softly, gratefully accepting the tissues Woojin offered him. He blew his nose, "sorry" the others waved him off, "you feeling alright?"

"Yeah, just my allergies" he sniffled, his breath hitched, "hh-hhKTChheh" he sniffled, he noticed his members staring at him in shock, "what?"

"That's it?" Woojin said, sounding shocked, "no, it can't be. It's never just one" Donghyun added, Daehwi shrugged, "maybe my nose is broken"

"Must be," Woong shook his head, "we need to document this. It's a never before seen sight, Daehwi only sneezed once" Woojin exclaimed, he pulled his phone out and pretended to record, Daehwi half-heartedly smacked the phone. "Guys I don't know why either. But- hhtKKtchu- hhektchu- Hh-hhh- ehhh- ehhktchh-uh- ktchhU"

"That's more like our maknae," Donghyun said as Woong handed Daehwi tissues, "yeah, it felt weird to only sneeze once." He admitted. "Felt weird to hear you only sneeze once" Woong said, the others agreed. "Must have been a fluke. I don't think that's ever happened before."

"Glad your nose is back to normal" Woojin said, as he threw his arm around the maknae's shoulder, Daehwi rolled his eyes and shrugged the arm off. "You guys are making this such a big deal"

"Well yeah, I mean in the nearly 4 years I've known you, you've never sneezed just once" Woong said, the others nodded in agreement. "Honestly I don't remember another time I've just sneezed once. It kinda sucks. My nose is so itchy after" he cut himself off with four sneezes in rapid succession. "Bless you, let's get you back to the dorm. You didn't take your allergy medicine this morning did you?" Daehwi shook his head, "alright, let's get you back to the dorm and taken care of" he smiled, "thanks guys"

"No problem kid"

[nubreed73]

AO3 wrapped!

Tagged by @idrilka and I completely forgot until @stickmarionette reminded me!

Because I write AND vid I’ll be including the vids in my numbers too

Works Published: 26 - 3 fics, 1 fic WiP (unfinished),  14 vids (WTAF) and 8 vidlets/edits 

Total Word Count: 86,081 - most of that for my unfinished WiP

Most Popular by Kudos: This is a no-brainer because in April I went from a juggernaut fandom (Chen Qing Ling/The Untamed) to a miniscule one (Naui Nara/My Country the New Age) and my unfinished WiP Lotus Flowers Rising From the Dark Mud has the lion’s share of my kudos for 2022.

Most Hits: Also Lotus Flowers

Longest: I feel like a broken  record, but Lotus Flowers, unfinished at 122k is the longest story I have ever written by around 200% and that’s with it still being incomplete!

Shortest: My SeonHwi post-canon-divergent fic that I posted on New Year’s Eve:  can’t hold my heart hostage

Vid that made me cry: I’m changing this one up because @rhea314‘s SeonHwi vid, Iscariot, which I saw in the Fanworks Minicon in April this year immediately destroyed me and it’s what made me watch My Country the New Age in the first place which has occupied my brain for nearly nine months.

Fic that made me cry: Deer Heart (Beyond Evil) by @drivingsideways which is an extremely devastating Park Jeong-je character study along with extremely messed-up Jeing-je/Dong-sik fucking around post-series. It is absolutely eviscerating.

Fic that made me smile: sing for the damage we've done (and the worse things that we'll do), by kinkywrists which was my gift for the Hongbao Exchange - Lounge Singer!Xiao Zhan and Bodyguard!Wang Yibo - just a delight from start to finish

Vid that made me smile: This delightful Do-hwan/Se-jong constructed reality AU vid by flwrjus

Events participated in: Hongbao Exchange for Lunar New Year.

Most Underrated Fic: it’s hard to say if they’re underrated because the fandom is so small, but probably my most recent MCTNA fic (can’t hold my heart hostage) it is short and I say it’s a PWP but the porn is not really the point here. What this fic is is a deep dive into Nam Seon-ho’s insecurities and abandonment issues and the fact that these have not magically disappeared just because he has Hwi in his life again.

Coming in 2023: Oh god. SO MUCH MCTNA fic. I have the following I am already working on: 1) another post-canon fixit fic 2) a companion piece to the post-canon-fixit fic already posted 3) a canon-divergent fic where Seon-ho and Sung-rok are taken by the Jurchen before they can return to the capital post-Liaodong and Seon-ho becomes a warlord. 10 years later, Hwi (who thinks Seon-ho is dead and vice versa) is an emisary for Bang-won and is found in unfriendly Jurchen territory and is taken as a warprize, unbeknownst to Seon-ho, 4) my crime family Modern AU, 5) my planned Kushiel’s Legacy fusion and about 6 more (lol i know i know)

(edit: also maybe some RPF shhhh don’t judge me)

Plus approximately 46598049856046 vids for MCTNA, Little Women, Under the Queen’s Umbrella, All of Us Are Dead and the list goes on

I am probably too late to tag anyone but anyone who wants to do it PLEASE DO

[cumberbatchedandproud]

@candlewinds (OP) #seon ho every ep like 'i'm a bad b*tch from now on i'm done caring about people' he said caringly as he cared @whoisthatmovinginthedark #this is what he was holding in and hiding from everyone #look at his mask crumble #oh no just look at him #he was holding it in for yeon’s sake because that’s what he does #but in reality he feels so much #seon ho my beloved @boogiesheep #the way he always keeps his cool until hwi is involved #then all logic flies out the window @itsza #THE FUCKING WAY HE KEEPS TRYING TO HOLD BACK AND NOT APPEAR AFFECTED #BUT HE CAN'T #BECAUSE HWI IS ALIVE AND HE THOUGHT HWI WAS DEAD AND HE THOUGHT HE'D FAILED HIS FRIEND AND LOST HIM AND FAILED YEON TOO #he dares let himself hope here @bienmoreau #absolutely with you in the prev tags. im going insane over him. always. but specifically right now over this!! #he has crafted his mask with such dedication but the MOMENT there is the possibility that hwi is alive it all crumbles. #it breaks him open right down to his bleeding heart cause thats who he is. that always who hes going to be under all the armour & pretence #wdh owns my funking soul for what he did in this show @ithacanradio #insane that realizing hwi is alive hits him more than thinking he died #like he truly hanged on just for yeons sake #and the moment they tell him his best friend is alive all his carefully constructed composure and smiles fall in the face of relief @nubreed73 This bodies me EVERY TIME. Absolutely superb acting choices here. The way his face CRUMBLES INTO DUST. DEVASTATING. (Also not over @idrilka pointing out to me that when they're tied up in the barn that he calls Hwi "Hwi-ya") Bromance my ASS. Hwi is still Seon-ho's everything and always will be and nothing will ever convince me otherwise. @valarinde #the power this single scene has over me is unreal. acting…. acting.. #fuck . his face @mctna #I CANNOT BELEISVEEEEEEEEEE HIS FACE THE EXPRESSIONS THE WMOTIONS OH GOD @kanronotatsu #his face journey here #he deserves an award just for this @wack-overflow #the face journey to end all face journeys @lwjesbian #WHERE are his awards for this scene are you JOKING !!?.??.?.?.?.!?..?? he is so ……. #has no right to look so broken and relieved and scared and . and … #ahhhgrggrghgghhgah!!!!! #the way he calms down a little right before he asks ‘is he alive?’ @vyinter #woo do hwan's acting workshop on cryearning (crying+yearning) @evakant #WHERE are his awards #WHERE ARE THEY????? #ACTING #fuck!!! #op...... op! #oh op!!!!!!!! #speechless #he is so powerful

Did something happen to Hwi?

[egerhjtrt]

너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막)

너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막) 링크<<

너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막)

너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막)

너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막)

너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화 2화 3화 4화 5화 6화 7화 8화 9화 10화 11화 12화 13화 (자막)

Born on June 23, 1958 in Haeundae-gu, Busan Metropolitan City [6], when he was preparing for his debut, his real name 'Lee Young-chun' was unconventional, so he thought of a stage name, but he wanted to become the best singer lik너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막)e Na Hoon-ah, and he wanted to be a singer like a boxing round. I named myself Na Undo, which means to live hard in the round, but the manager said that 'Undo' was okay, but it would be difficult to succeed because the surname 'I' was not good, so he suggested that we study other surnames. [7]

His son Lee Yoo (real name Lee Seung-hyun) debuted as a member of the idol group Pokerz in January 2010, but later withdrew. After that, from October 2013, under the stage name Lumin, as the 7th member of the 6-member idol group Empire, he resumed activities from the 2nd single. He was assigned to 너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막)a battalion of the division and was discharged on August 13, 2018. His son's attitude towards eating sweet pumpkin became a hot topic.In the beginning of his debut, he had been active with long hair like this. He is a representative singer-songwriter in the trot world. He composed hit songs such as 'Samba Woman' and 'I Only Loved You', and there are numerous cases where fellow singers received Seol Undo's songs and made them hits.[8] Meanwhile, his spouse Lee Soo-jin works as a lyricist, and many 너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막)of Seol Undo's songs were written by Lee Su-jin. The lyrics for his 2nd hit song 'Woman Girl Girl' was the beginning, and the story was revealed in Radio Star, where he appeared with Jang Yoon-jung. When Lee Soo-jin wanted to work as a lyricist, Seol-woon also said that he knew how to compose and became close.

In the past, I was often called on Sunday nights to do comedy acts. When reproducing 'Beauty and the Beast' in Cinema Heaven, the beast played the role of a prince after the magic was broken [9], and in TV Life Theater, he played the role of Lee Hwi-jae's evil boss.

On February 10, 2016, in the Lunar New Year special program 'Voice of God', he sang Yoon Hyun-seok's LOVE, a song that was unfamiliar to him, and received praise for his excellent performance that struck the back of the people who u너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막)nderestimated Seol Un-do's singing ability.[10 ] Since then, he has demonstrated that class by appearing in various music-related programs such as Maritel and Duet Song Festival.

On December 24, 2016, he appeared as a special guest on the radio drama KBS stage, the longest-running program in Korea. KBS Stage My Original (Video from 1:00)

After participating as a judge in the 3rd contest of King of Mask Singer, I participated in the 47th contest of King of Mask Singer in 2017 as a funny jjambbong. In the first round, when he was annoyed, he sang Ahn Sang-soo's 'Forever Me' against Jajangmyeon and won, and in the second round, he sang너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막) Kim Jeong-ho's 'Nameless Girl' passionately and had a close match with his opponent Yong-man, Hello in the semi-finals, by 5 votes. The judges' reactions were so good that after taking off their masks, they sang Kim Hyun-shik's 'My Love, Beside너는 방과 후 인섬니아 다시 보기 1화~13화 (자막) Me', a preparation song for the 3rd round, and came down. He revealed that he appeared because he wanted to break the age prejudice, and in the contest that day, he participated in the contest only with songs of other genres, excluding his main specialty, trot. Most of the online reactions were also favorable, and they were very sorry for his defeat. After that, he participated again as a judge in the 50th and 84th contests.[11]

On May 22, 2019, he appeared as a guest on Channel A’s liberal arts program Happy Morning.

In 2020, Hidden Singer 6 Chuseok special broadcast, appeared as the 8th original singer.

[mctna2019]

MCTNA favorite scenes(2)

+your sword still feels affectionate

I don't know what can I say about this scene.this scene is full of pain,sadness and frustration. Everywhere is fire even in their eyes.there haven't many dialogue but each dialogue is so deep and touching. We have no extra acting or dialogue ever. Acting is amazing ,they acted with their heart. I love that swords dancing, that beautiful rotation like Hwi and Seon-ho went to past and they were getting along again. Each stab they take from each other makes my heart more broken until Hwi does the last and I felt I can't watch it anymore. Seon-ho's gaze when Hwi’s sword passed his body and also after that, is unbearable. Other happens are too fast and really out of control. I didn't expect that reaction and dialogue from Namjeon (I'll write about it in future) but Do Hwan acting and subtle movements of his face are really extraordinary . Hwi's look to Seon-ho made my heart broken more,he is like that Hwi in 10 years ago.When he pushes Hwi away, his gaze is devoid of anger, but Hwi somehow beggs him not to push him away. Those emotionless eyes are too much for Hwi when he pushes his hand away. His sad and regretful look drives me crazy every time. His movements are devoid of any anger or harshness, he gently pushes away Hwi's hand, but it is unbearable for Hwi. He has done this for the first time, and it destroys Hwi. As devastating as it is, Hwi needed to realize how far he had come and come to his senses.When Hwi leaves and Seon-ho closes his eyes I wanted to scream at Hwi how could he leave him alone???? Hwi was so devastated he couldn't get up and he couldn't leave but Seon-ho needed him, Hwi leave him in the middle of hell. (Of course Seon-ho won't be alone because Sung-rok was with him even he was stabbed, I love his surprised look. This proves that Seon-ho is still not alone. But he is very broken and I am very sad)

[puppy-phum]

10 Characters

tagged by the lovely @i-got-the-feels​​ ♥ thank you a ton! am trying to keep this short (and not too serious so forget about cool character analysis for now sigh) bc tumblr crashed. or my old laptop crashed? when i started this the other night but i won’t be giving up so here goes.

(my love for my blorbos is overflowing so placing all of it under a cut to spare ppl who do not care! but please do know i care about all of your blorbos a ton ♥)

so tagging in return: @dimpledpran @i-am-just-a-kiddo @ashenlights @psychic-waffles @s1utspeare @talaypuens @laowen​ @snimeat @luna-lina @machikeita​ @eohachu ♥

Fah (Mek Jirakit) Sky in Your Heart

- if i had to pick a (fictional) doctor, this would be the guy ♥ - deserves care and understanding more than anything else, so happy prince is giving that to him (communication! my biggest kink!) - an overgrown puppy on the inside, fighter on the outside - will charm you, your mom, and the whole of your friend group. with one smile. - will be a brat about it

Puen (Jimmy Jitaraphol) Vice Versa

- living his missed childhood in the other universe as he should bc he deserves to be himself for a moment - actually the gentlest man alive - owner of the puppiest puppy eyes you've ever seen, pls don't tell him no - unhinged, horny, and absolutely insufferable. i’m obsessed. - loves taking care of others but is actually a baby ♥ (- jimmy my beloved, i adore thee)

Nam Seonho (Woo Dohwan) My Country: The New Age

- my poor little meow meow. pathetic. broken. doer of evil deeds yet forgiven and loved ♥ - looks absolutely fantastic tortured and wet. i apologize for saying this (not) - his smile is his greatest weapon, be glad he doesn't get to use it too often (which is to say: give him happiness or else) - i would go to war for him, guess me and hwi have something in common - i would also kill his father for him so. idk. hwi take good care of him or i will replace you?

Riku (VA: David Gallagher/Mamoru Miyano) Kingdom Hearts

- i know maybe 10% of his whole story but he's my blorbo by choice - the emo boy of my heart ♥ - cool hair my dude, glad it's smaller now - i cry every time he's on screen while i play kh3 bc he's just So Good - did i tell you he's a cliché emo boy antagonist(?) bc he totally is

Cha Siwon (Kang Eunbin) Blueming

- never will move on from his story arc and all that happened there - he just really gets it. he really gets how hard it is to be loved in the wrong ways, in the ways you cannot enjoy, and then trying to accept the right ways, the ways you can enjoy ♥ - one of the best bl characters i've ever had the pleasure of watching - no one is allowed to hurt him - cradle him and tell him he's good the way he is, i beg

Bai Choufei (Liu Yuning) Heroes

- i have never ever before been this angry for a fictional character - like yeah i know he's The Worst but he deserved better (from the writers) and i will fight about that - he loves wang xiaoshi so much it's making me want to howl - the prettiest ♥ like pls if evil why so sexy - catch me talking about his final "it hurts" line even when am 80yo and in a retirement home, that shit hurted (- liu yuning the man that you are ;; ♥)

Tin (Tae Darvid) Triage

- now i feel bad about picking fah as my doctor guy bc tin's here too but ER is different i swear - the character development for him? phenomenal - someone who loves cats cannot be a bad guy - goofiest and the most endearing smile, i love he ♥ - his willpower so strong i bet it would've brought him back from the dead even without tol

Kan (Neo Trai) The Eclipse

- there are parts of me in this boy and i hate staring into the mirror every friday - but at the same time all i wanna do is pick him apart bc he's Me - if i could collect his smiles into a jar and keep that for the dark days of winter i would - he is so soft it's driving me insane ;; like who hurt you, i will fight them - never thought i'd love a neo character like this, yet here we are ♥

Five (Aidan Gallagher) The Umbrella Academy

- my fave 15yo grandpa, an absolute icon for us old souls - the best humor ♥ - so young, so old, so tired of this bullshit we call life. why must we remain - the oldest brother yet gets zero respect in that household - i actually adore how smart he is yet he's also just So Dumb (but does this family even own a braincell? questions for the universe)

Theo (Book Kasidet) Enchanté

- when we ignore the ending of this show, he truly is my beloved ♥ - theo losing his faith to love hit me like a truck. i never recovered. - i am so happy he got his own love tho, happiness looks so good on him ♥ (and so does marriage! thank you vv for that ;; new forcebook series when????) - the maker of chaos, the doer of tiny evils. cat behavior i'd say - his closet is to die for

thank you once more for tagging me and thank you for reading! let's see again, maybe next year, with yet another random assortment of characters :'D 

[woodohwanedandproud]

@seechi #the most unbelievaable thing about mctna is not the kind of injuries hwi and seon ho shrug off like it's nothing#it's that hwi believed seon ho's bad poker face for even one hot minute @lilsjames #''everyone is a monster to someone#since you are so convinced that i am yours#i will be it'' @blackswan-wildgeese #he's complicated#and this set shows it off so well @pondsphuwin #i love him and all his personalities#and this is such a wonderful set! showing all his different facets#my boy has layers!!!!!#is he a gemini sun......#much to think about @convenientalias #explain yourself dude#what is your philosophy i know you have one @petekaos #YALL YALL this gifset gets right under the skin of seon ho's character i'm in awe... god the meshing of those two scenes#parallels narrative structure something something pain!!#the way the true nam seon ho is so hidden and yet so plain on the surface.#the true nam seon ho is like his mother. compassionate & righteous & defending.#and YET the way he sheds all of this and adopts his father's attitude like a second skin#the way that he above all is hwi's childhood friend even in the end#the GRIP this show has me in is unbelievable. @navramanan #almost gasped at the parallel in gif 5#the real nam seonho is the one who is compassionate loyal loving defensive. the real nam seonho is like his mom and nothing like his dad#but growing up with his dad feeling pressure getting ridiculed all his life. he had to act tough and hurt people to survive#and it killed him to be like that. he said he learned to intimidate people by using his father's name#he used that power only to protect the ones he loves. he wouldn't have looked down on chido in ihwaru if hwi wasnt in that situation#and i know it broke him apart to treat hwi that way after he had returned from war. being the son of a harsh father#he had to act and behave in ways against his own nature. repress his emotions. just to survive#axxx seonho the way you break my heart @rain-hat #love seamayweed's gifsets#really get under the skin of mctna#such a beautiful way of composing thoughtful meta#that's also a love letter#to characters

and oups my tags if that's allowed for that one time but this gifset does mean A LOT to me: #i love him okay #he's a mess #he's a delight #he's just layers of pain guilt regret broken dreams shattered hopes bad choices and worse choices and EVERYTHING #i just want him to smile #a real smile #and not die right after #is that truly that much to ask #forever sobbing

Cold and distant noble who tramples on the weak, passionate defender of lowborns, capricious snake, enemy, childhood friend and stranger both —

                                                      m o n s t e r

Who is the real Nam Seon-ho?

[tomorrowsdrama]

Hahahaha. Your lists never disappoint. I have another one. Top 10 loss-of-innocense scene. Theres a level of emotional whump that only few actors and actresses convey well when they are betrayed or they witness a brutality that changes them forever. And I'm excited to hear your favs

Oh anon, this ask is wonderful but terrible at the same time because I had to really dig deep and think about all the scenes that broke some of my favorite characters (and me).  Except for number 1, everything else is in no particular order.

1. This goes to Ni Ni as Feng Zhiwei in The Rise of Phoenixes. I can’t really pinpoint one particular scene because the entire drama is just an exercise in how to break down the originally naive and brilliant Zhiwei through the cruelty of the palace and the fight for the throne. My goodness, Ni Ni is as amazing at acting as she is beautiful and you could just see the light slowly fade in Zhiwei’s eyes as more and more of the people she loved died because of her. I mean…

2. When Teng Zijing dies and Fan Xian goes on a rampage trying to seek revenge in Joy of Life. This really is the turning point for Fan Xian and the drama and it goes from “haha look at my charmed life Fan Xian” to “I will literally kill a man in the streets to avenge my friend Fan Xian.”  The story always retains its humor but after Teng Zijing’s death, there’s an added sense of danger and gravitas as it becomes clear that that one character you loved so much could drop dead at any second for no discernable reason or fanfare.  Zhang Ruo Yun amazingly portrays the duality of happy-go-lucky Fan Xian “transmigrated from modern times” and “I’m not above psychological warfare to achieve what I want Fan Xian.”  

3. Dae Gil in Chuno transforming from a soft and sweet noble young master into a jaded rugged slave hunter after his entire family is killed in a fire.  I can’t complain though because his hot points went up by like 1,000 after he lost his “innocence” ahaha

4. When Yeon Kyung witnessed Heo Im having to lower himself to the nobleman in order to try to save the servant’s life and you can see when she finally realizes just how harsh the caste system is in Joseon society and that they’re not in Kansas anymore.  Bonus points for how heartbreaking it was to see the usually playful and good-natured Heo Im desperately plead for the servant’s life by degrading himself to appease the nobelman

5. When Byun Yo Han’s character in Six Flying Dragons helplessly watches as his childhood crush gets assaulted by a group of man and all he can do is hide because he is a literal child who is understandably too scared to do anything (and would not have been able to do anything).  And then he becomes a deadly warrior to try to make up for that one moment of weakness in his life that destroyed both his and his crush’s innocence.  Bonus points for Lee Bang Won (played by Yoo Ah In) slowly but surely losing his hero worship of his father and becoming more and more disillusioned and cutthroat to achieve his goal of founding a new kingdom.

6. My sweet bb Hwi from My Country the New Age getting screwed over by the world over and over again.  All he ever wanted was to have enough rice to feed himself and his sister but what did we get instead...

7. Wolf boy thinking he was betrayed and turning from a sweet and innocent wolf boy with abs into super fine and hot asshole Prince Bo who kills without remorse and then back again to his former good self while still retaining the hotness of the asshole Prince Bo.

8. Minglan was always a bit guarded and didn’t trust people much outside of her adopted grandma after her mother was killed in childbirth, but I feel like she completely lost all hope and expectation in people when Qi Heng broke his promise to her and let her down.

9. Want to see a man get broken down to the point where he’s just a ptsd laden husk of his former self?  Watch Lee Byung Hun in Iris.

10. This is reserved for Luo Jin in Royal Nirvana.  Have only watched 3 episodes but @dangermousie ‘s posts about it tell me there’s a lot of emotional whump and torture to look forward to and unfortunately, it doesn’t look like Luo Jin gets out unscathed.

[saturnsummer]

flutter and kicks

notes: from lay's @/__ryubeom tweet + a pregnant solhwi anon ask. in headcanon form since it's more spontaneous! 

hello tumblr fam! i know, it’s been long... but ficfest and all has kept me kinda busy. a little different this time! a headcanon after a long time, since it’s more fun and easy on the eyes!

extra notes: drumstick reference to hospital playlist episode 4! a little reference to @scripturiends twitter au “dynasty” at the end. have fun! as usual, grammar mistakes by me!

attorney sol and prosecutor joon hwi have been married for a couple years, now well into their early thirties.

sol and joon hwi always take walks in the parks and wondered what it would be like if they had their own.

sol was initially hesitant, with her experience of broken families and having no dad figure. what makes her think her child could grow up in a loving family, if she didn't have one she could be a role model or look up to?

but joon hwi had it worse, having been an orphan from young, and raised by his uncle, his cousins, aunts and relatives ostracising him. yet, he still believed in the happy family he always wanted with sol.

he dreamt of kissing his kids good morning, sending them to school before going to work and sending his wife to work. on nights, they would work on their kid's homework together in fun ways and tuck them in bed after bedtime stories. they would spend the weekends at parks, meeting with seungjae's kid, and the children of their friends.

sol came round eventually, seeing how joon hwi never stopped believing. this time, it was different. joon hwi is not her father, nor is he her step father. he is han joon hwi, the man that saved her lives multiple times. han joon hwi, the man that stood by her when lee man ho was her biggest threat to her family. han joon hwi, the man who loves her, despite being a klutz in school.

he is han joon hwi, the man that loves her for every imperfection and perfection she has.

sol and joon hwi start trying for a baby, which is especially timely when kang sol's mom asks when is she gonna have a grandchild to hold and byeol pipes up saying she would love to have a brother as opposed to sister. (15 years with sisters have made her wonder what it would be to have a little baby boy in the house instead.)

a few weeks after their first time trying passes and sol has been feeling more tired. she's been busy with case after case at kang and park, so she doesn't think much.

only when she misses her period, she freezes. as stressed as she was, even in law school, she has never missed her period or was late. with shaky breaths, she wonders at the slightest chance of having a little life grow in her, as her hand unconsciously travels to her stomach.

sol is excited, but nervous at the thought that maybe nine to ten months later, she would have a child she can call her own in her arms.

over the weekend, sol raised this to joon hwi. joon hwi stops everything and even though he is beyond excited, he stays calm looking at how nervous sol is. together, they go out to get two pregnancy tests, where sol takes it.

the ten minutes of waiting were a complete torture for sol, as she paces back and forth.

"sol, stop pacing. you're going to burn a hole in our floor."

"joon! what- what if it really happens? i'm not ready! how are we ready? you just started your career in the prosecutor office, and i'm buried under cases! i can barely take care of my mom and byeol and myself, what about the child? oh no, what if i'm a bad mom?"

"honey, sit down. look, we'll get through this together okay? no one is ever ready for their first kid. remember seungjae-hyung? he freaked out the day juyeon-noona went into labour and he's a doctor! it's okay, just calm down, alright? do you want warm water?"

when the timer rings, they look at both the tests, showing the double lines indicating a positive test.

sol was pregnant. sol was going to be a mother. joon hwi was going to be a father. their family was starting.

shaking, sol finally let her emotions hit as her tears fall. she was so caught up worrying about herself, life, her work, family; she hadn't had time to process her own feelings on her own. she wanted the feeling of joy of holding her child. she wanted to know what it was like to share a mother's bond with a child.

joon hwi, looking at his wife, only hugged her as she teared up in happiness. his dream of having a family is finally coming. even better, his best friend, his biggest cheerleader, was next to him.

"what are you crying about? you should be happy!"

"j-joon h-hwi ah... we're going to be parents.."

but their journey was far from over. they booked an appointment with juyeon and made juyeon stay quiet about this. seeing the ultrasound and hearing the heartbeats of their unborn child was enough to move sol to another round of sobs and joon hwi held his wife's hand while the tears ran down his face. together, they smiled, knowing that a life was born and growing.

all could have been hidden, but seungjae walked in that moment, asking if his wife wanted to join for lunch. sol and joon hwi were prepared to lie, but having a printed ultrasound scan in their hands, and the fact that they were in juyeon's clinic, a OB-GYN clinic, confirmed suspicions.

"juyeonnie, do you want to go for— joon...hwi?"

"oppa..."

"ah, congratulations sol. congratulations joon hwi." seungjae only smiled looking at the best people he knew become parents. he recognised the pride in joonhwi's eyes, the same eyes he had when juyeon told him they were expecting.

the new parents smiled at their brotherly figure as they wished them a good lunch.

but out from the corner, yeseul spotted joonhwi and sol as she walked into the clinic and she locked eyes with sol. sol slams the door shut and drags joon hwi back and groans, letting a defeated whine.

"sol-ah, what's wrong?"

"yeseul is here! she's probably here for a regular check up, the one she told me about last month!"

and with that, their phones started beeping with countless notifications.

yeseul could put two and two together, especially when it wasn't just sol, but joon hwi in the clinic as well. she texted her boyfriend, bokgi, who spat out his soup when he was eating with yebeom, who sent a string of messages to the group chat.

when sol opens the door again, yeseul only gives a sheepish smile.

"yeseul ah..." sol sighs and joon hwi only smiles, too happy to hide this secret.

"sorry unnie, i can't miss the moment. congrats unnie, oppa! hello, seungjae-oppa, juyeon-unnie!"

"thank you, yeseul. we'll see you next week, as usual?"

behind them, seungjae grumpily argues with his wife.

"why are my ex-classmates seeing you more than i do? i literally work, like, five blocks down at the police station! they live all over seoul!"

"honey, let me see yeseul first, okay? then let's go get lunch. i heard they are serving drumsticks in the canteen today.”

-----

pregnancy wasn't easy for sol. she insisted on working, despite attorney park's orders to take on lesser cases in court. sol couldn't find it in her heart to reject her clients.

yeseul, working closer to sol, would lunch with her to make sure she eats for the sake of her baby. joon hwi did his best to join, despite sol's arguments to not bother and that she can care for herself.

her morning sickness was bad, and she would wake up giddy and nauseous. many times, joon hwi wanted to call jiho to ask him to cover him, but sol would not let him do it. she'll pull herself together and go to work, and promise to take work lightly.

on days she couldn't get out of bed and she was too tired, her mother would come over and cook her nutritious soups, stock their fridge with vitamins and supplements and tonics for sol.

sol's cravings were also odd. she was never one to like sweets, but she found herself craving sugary cakes, cookies and pastries. joon hwi made it a point to stock their cabinets with cookies and buy a cake whenever he could for his wife.

joon hwi was honestly the best husband anyone could ask for. he helped to tidy the house, clean the house while sol was resting. he made soups and tucked sol in bed on her down days.

sol felt bad that she was being cared for and doing nothing in return, but joon hwi would always remind her that she was already doing the most important job, which is to literally grow their kid inside her.

many nights before bed, they would sit together and their hands would rest on her stomach, as they whisper sweet things to their to-be child.

when sol first felt the kick of her child with joon, they smiled so wide, all exhaustion from reports and arguments in their offices were gone. all that mattered was their child responding.

yeseul was beyond excited, as she helped sol with getting furniture and clothes. the study group came together to help them set up a new cot in their small apartment, as the ladies sat while looking at the men, fixing a cot with much difficulty.

aunty yeseul was the first to buy a stuffed bunny for her unborn child, and sol b, even though she was usually cold, offered to babysit in the future.

eventually, attorney park made sol work at home instead of going to the office. she argued that professor kim eunsook was able to teach while pregnant, but attorney park only said "yang jonghoon's orders" and it was enough to shut her up from any complaints.

of course, professor yang. the only person attorney park really is afraid of and listens to.

when they found out that sol was having a boy, joon hwi was lost in thoughts, wondering if he will grow to be like himself. but sol only placed a hand over his and gave a comforting smile.

"remember what you said at the beginning? whatever it is, he will be of the next generation. from him, it will be different."

they then would discuss how they wanted joon hwi's dimples, sol's twinkling eyes and cheekbones and joon hwi's charming smile.

closer to the due date, jiho stepped in to cover for joon hwi as he started to work half days, afraid of leaving his wife at home. sol, now heavily pregnant, really only commuted to the bed from the bathroom and then to the table, where she would spend most of her time reading or doing something relaxing.

yeseul made sol put her on speed dial with sol b, just in case, and so they would be the first to know too.

the morning came when sol woke up to a wet bed and shook joon hwi awake when the contractions kicked in. joon hwi snapped out, grabbed their hospital bag and guided sol to the car where both of them spent the next day in the hospital as sol went through nine hours of labour pains, and another two hours pushing her baby boy.

joon hwi never left once, standing by her side and holding her hand as she pushed her baby out, wiping away the sweat from her face.

when the time came for him to be held in his mother's arms, sol only smiled, knowing that as tough as the past ten months of working, no caffeine and staying up late nights was, it was all worth it for the little life in her arms.

as his son's hand grabbed onto joon hwi's finger, joon hwi made a promise to love this child unconditionally, to guide him in the right direction and bring him up well. sol was right. from him onwards, it will be different.

welcome to the world, seungjun.

[shinysobi]

i came in from the outside, burnt out from the joyride

this was born out of a conversation with @akinosakiya, so all credits go to her >.<

chapter i | chapter 2 (coming soon)

Han Joon Hwi and Kang Sol, years after graduation. post-canon fix it, idiots to lovers.

ao3

a/n : i got this idea as i feverishly dm'd my friend about a solhwi prompt,,, i took it too far i think >.<

please tell me if you like it!!

a/n: title taken from Hozier's Almost (sweet music) which i recommend while reading this.

chapter 1: you and i are lovers in the dark

There has got to be another way of doing this. I can’t be doing this all my life.

“You know,” the words from Yeseul makes her look up, “you didn’t have to do this to yourself. You could have not taken the case, eonni. I told you not to take the case.”

Sol doesn’t say anything, just hangs her head in shame. The soju burns as she tips her head back, draining the last dregs of it, “I knew I shouldn’t have asked you for help. You’re being insufferable now that you’re dating Bok-gi.”

Yeseul laughs, reaching for the soda can, “eonni, I think you’re thinking about it too much.”

“I am, aren’t I?” she looks at the other girl, clearly panicked, “does it show? Oh, it shows, doesn’t it? Oh, what am I going to do—”

“Ah, noona, you shouldn’t have taken this case on, then,” Bok-gi says as he enters the room and take in the sight of a dishevelled Sol and a grinning Yeseul, “oh, Yeseul noona, I was looking all over for you!”

Sol scowls, “haven’t the two of you been dating forever? Why do you still have the honorific? And for your information, I took the case before I knew it was going to be him that I would have to go up against.”

Bok-gi looks affronted, and Yeseul comes to her boyfriend’s rescue, “ah, I like it, eonni.”

“Of course, you like it, you’re just as gone for him as he is,” she grumbles, “so, Bok-gi, Yeseul’s been telling you everything now, has she?”

“Ah, eonni, leave him out of it,” Yeseul soothes her, rubbing circles into her back, “do you want me to take the case? Instead of you—”

“The client won’t agree on it,” Sol whines, “and just when I thought I had got rid of him.”

“Rid of who?” so Bok-gi doesn’t know, Sol notes with some amount of pleasure, good. At least Yeseul didn’t tell him about the fact that—

“Oh, eonni might have to work with Joon-hwi oppa,” Yeseul chirps, looking entirely too pleased for Sol’s liking, “she’s the public defender for Joon-hwi oppa’s case.”

“The attempted murder one?” Bok-gi sounds as perplexed as Sol is, “but I thought hyung only dealt with financial cases, what happened? Didn’t you say you had some other prosecutor to deal with, noona?”

Sol groans, “apparently he’s taking criminal cases too, and the first one he chose to take was mine,” she stands up, “can’t I ever get rid of him?”

Yeseul blinks, “why did you have to get rid of him in the first place?”

Sol groans, sitting down on the chair with a thump. This was becoming a frighteningly regular occurrence, groaning at the mere mention of his name, “I told you, you wouldn’t understand.”

“You sound like a sixteen-year-old right now, noona,” Bok-gi giggles, and she scowls at him. How dare they find happiness in my misery. Just because she loved them didn’t mean she would put up with everything that they did.

Liar. You’ll always put up with whatever they do.

Wait, why did that sound like him? Did he finally manage to get inside her head?

No. no, calm down, Kang Sol. Joon-Hwi is not inside your brain. Your brain is filled with statutes of law, precedents, your grocery list, the things you need to buy Byeol for her birthday—

You have too many things on your mind.

Ah, fuck.

She stands up again, taking a look at Bok-gi and Yeseul’s surprised faces, and sits back down, “never mind. It’s just him. how bad could it be? We just lost touch over the years, and I specifically made sure to not keep in touch with him after we graduated—I’m going to die, Yeseul-ah.”

“No, eonni, you won’t,” Yeseul props her up gently, pushing the bowl of bibimbap towards her, “at least eat something before you cry.”

“No, you’re right,” Bok-gi agrees, although Sol knows he’s laughing at her internally, the little shit, “it’s wrong to cry and not eat. I’ll be dehydrated.”

The food tastes bland in her mouth, although she knows she’s made it spicy, but Sol works her way through it with tears in her eyes (she passes it off as due to the spice) and promptly starts sobbing again, lamenting her crappy life.

“Eonni, the trial isn’t until next month, you have enough time to prepare,” Yeseul tries to placate her, but it only increases the volume of her groans.  A whole month spent dreading the presence of Han Joon-Hwi as she prepared for the trial. “You’ll win it, right?”

There. That was what had been bugging her. The fact that he hadn’t lost a single case since he’d become prosecutor. It isn’t like she hadn’t expected this from him, coming first in her class, but—

“Is this even fair?” she wails, “the attempted murder case doesn’t even have to have him as the prosecutor, it is going to be easy for me to win, the client was framed, and there is no evidence—”

“Noona,” Bok-gi peers at her, his eyes going wide, “you’re scared, aren’t you?”

“Ah, it isn’t like that!” she tries to defend herself. But Yeseul just stares, “fine. You caught me. I’m scared of losing to him, he hasn’t even lost a single case since he made prosecutor, he’s on his way to becoming head prosecutor in less than a decade, and I’m—I’m barely surviving as it is, so why did Attorney Geun-Tae give this case to me?”

Both Bok-gi and Yeseul look shocked, and Sol isn’t surprised. They should be. She was the one who cut off contact with Joon-Hwi after graduation, claiming he didn’t need her to weigh him down, and she was the person who did everything without a single glance backwards, so why was she being so defensive? “It’s not like I don’t want to whine all the fucking time, it’s just that—”

“Whoa, noona swears a lot when it comes to Joon-Hwi hyung, who knew.” Bok-gi says, clapping a hand over his mouth, “have you always been this way, or did this just happen after you found out that you were going up against him?”

Sol scowls, “you’ve been trying to act cute, don’t try that with me, Min Bok-gi.”

Yeseul nods at Bok-gi. Sol scowls again. Traitor.

--

The truth is, she should have known this was coming. Their field doesn’t leave much for anonymity, and even if it did, why did she think it would be so easy to avoid Joon-Hwi? The boy—sorry, man, she supposes she should give him at least that much, they were both in their thirties now—the man was everywhere, the newest rising star in the prosecution. Even her boss, the clueless Park Geun-Tae knew about it, and had requested her to work in a case against him. her, the person who barely passed her law school course at Hankuk. Who has a sister far smarter than her, better than her at all aspects, who really isn’t cut out to be in this profession, something which she’s heard all too often from everyone, and all she wants to do is yell I know, I know, she knows it all.

Which is why, when Han Joon-Hwi approached her after the graduation ceremony, a determined look on his face, she dreaded the words that would come out of his mouth, and instead chose to flee. In retrospect, it wasn’t the best decision, but Kang Sol A isn’t known for making the best decisions.

She still lives with her mother and Byeol in that same house, where Joon had once installed a CCTV camera, which Lee Man-Ho had broken with a well-aimed rock, but the camera is still there, and while Byeol is in middle school now, a big girl, who doesn’t like Sol picking her up from school every day and who is already getting into trouble with that big mouth of hers, and certainly doesn’t need protecting, the camera is still there, and every once in a while, she likes to take a look at it, sipping beer after a long day at work. It’s obviously dysfunctional, but she likes to imagine that Joon-Hwi still takes a look at the camera feed, doing whatever “top secret” things he did.

She sighs, opening the door to their home. I have work to do if I need to beat Joon-Hwi.

--

“Why was I assigned to this case?” Joon-Hwi asks, surprise evident on his face, “I usually take financial dispute cases, this is an attempted murder, and the evidence doesn’t even look solid. Why am I being given this?”

He’s speaking to the wall in his office, and his paralegals are out on break, but he feels as though he should at least vent about this to something, if not someone. He’s supposed to be a star prosecutor, someone who hasn’t lost a single case since they stepped foot into the District Prosecutor’s office. And it’s true, he hasn’t lost a single case since he began working here, spurred on by a desire to both step out from under his uncle’s shadow and to prove himself.

The cases he has handled until now, have all been financial, catching the people who use money to get their way in the world, much like Ko Hyeong-Su, people so entitled to the world that they didn’t consider the rest of them as human beings. He liked bring them down to their level. Hell, he loved it.

But his specialty is not criminal law, and that too, a case that would be difficult for him to win, given that there was very little evidence and whatever he had, would never fly in a court of law. He’s kind of pissed at Prosecutor Lee for giving him the case. No, scratch that, he is pissed at Lee for giving him the case.

Defending lawyer—

Defending lawyer, Kang Sol.

Could it be?

He turns to his computer, and contemplates for a second if he should ask the police officer about the defending counsel, but decides against it. I don’t want to seem like a fool. Which—is correct. He is a fool.

So, he calls up the person who had the case before him, Prosecutor Shin, and tries not to hide the excitement in his words when he asks, “did you meet the defence counsel when you arrested the defendant, Prosecutor?”

“She didn’t have one,” the prosecutor replies, voice scratchy, and he wonders of he did the right thing by disturbing someone who was in the hospital, “we’ve indicted her, but the defence counsel was changed at the last moment, something about the public defender dropping the case. Her new counsel is some young lawyer, although she has a lot of experience.”

A lot of experience. “A lot of experience?”

“Yes,” the voice on the other side cracks, and there’s some commotion in the background, “I remember meeting her in the courthouse once. People call her crazy, the lengths she goes to defend her clients are insane. She’s a good egg though, doesn’t take on cases that she doesn’t like.”

“Hmm, thank you, Prosecutor,” he mumbles, hanging up the phone. So that’s what you’ve been doing all this time, Kang Sol. how long has it been, four-five years? And we’ve never met once, impressive.

He’s suddenly very excited for the initial hearing, even if he knows its going to be nearly impossible to win. But at least he can see her for the first time in years, even if its on the opposite side in a court of law. At least he has that.

—

“You’re being stupid,” Jiho says without much in the way of context, but Joon knows what he’s talking about, “you had to take a case just to meet her? A case you are most likely going to lose? What kind of person does that?”

Joon-Hwi rolls his eyes. Jiho was a good man, but sometimes, he really didn’t know the reason behind things. Or to be more specific, why Joon-Hwi did some things. Still, it was understandable as to why he would behave like this. Neither of them has had any connections with each other over the past five years, missing each other by mere moments at times, and yet, he’s still enamoured by her memory, of the way she used to look at her law books and the way she used to stick her highlighters in her hair, her triumphant smile after she answered something correctly; he remembers everything, and he gets nostalgic sometimes, but such is human nature, one supposes.

“It’s been five years, hyung,” Jiho mutters, pushing the bowl of soup towards him, “isn’t it time you gave up on Sol noona?”

He raises an eyebrow, “I didn’t think you addressed anyone as noona.”

Jiho shrugs, “she’s older than me, so it’s only right. And I did work with her on a case about three—two years ago, and she’s really become good. Or is it all the experience that she has had now, working as a partner at Attorney Park Geun-Tae’s firm, which is unheard of, at her age, but she’s far more competent than him—”

He’s talking, but Joon-Hwi doesn’t register anything anymore, “you’ve worked with her? Together?”

“Hmm?” Jiho mumbles, thrown off his track, “yes, I literally just said that I did, what are you thinking about?”

“No. no, back up a little,” he insists, and Jiho’s confused expression clears when he realises what exactly is Joon-Hwi implying.

“Really? You’re jealous over the fact that I worked with Sol noona? That’s how petty you’ve become now, hyung?” Jiho rolls his eyes, and Joon has the incessant need to just—bury his face in his hands, “you could just give her a call, you know.”

He glares. Jiho nods, “guess not,” and resumes eating. He takes another look at the case file, and sets it down, proceeding to shove food into his mouth. The Japanese restaurant has good food, he does agree, but nothing beats eating too-hot ramyeon at three in the morning with your best friend after you’ve finished reviewing three lectures’ worth of notes together. Crap. He still remembers her as his best friend, even though they haven't had any contact over the past years now. Pathetic.

But self-deprecation isn’t his forte, and he shakes his head at Jiho, who’s determinedly eating, “how’s Sol B doing? Isn’t she going to be a judge?”

“She’s still practicing,” Jiho replies, “her mother wants her to be a judge, although I don’t think Sol wants to do it. She’s happy being a legal scholar. Wants to become a professor at Hankuk later on, if the constitutional law position opens up.” His face has a curiously fond look when he’s talking about her, Joon notices, or perhaps it’s a trick of the light, because Jiho straightens up, “who gave you the case, though?”

“My superior sent it to me because the prosecutor in charge had fallen ill, and had to be taken to the hospital,” Joon-Hwi replies, “it isn’t east for me to win this one, even though—”

“Even though you’ve never lost a single case?” Bok-Gi’s voice almost makes the two of them jump, and Jiho sends a well-aimed smack his way, “so you’re taking noona’s case, are you, hyung?”

Jiho snorts, “he’s losing sleep here.”

“When did I say I was losing sleep?” Joon-Hwi begins to say indignantly, but Bok-gi is still grinning as he slides in beside Jiho, “who told you that, Seo Jiho?”

Jiho doesn’t say anything, so Bok-Gi fills in for him, “hyung, you look terrible. Haven’t you been eating properly?”

Joon-Hwi squints at the other boy, how did he know I haven’t been sleeping well? Does it show on my face? Is it that bad?

“It is that bad, hyung,” Jiho pipes up, “you look like death warmed over.”

“It isn’t that bad, honestly,” Bok-gi says, and promptly shuts up under Jiho’s glare, “jeez, all right, all right, he looks bad. Very bad. Bad with a capital B.”

Joon-Hwi groans. He was supposed to have been handling another financial scam by this time, but he’s now talking to two of his classmates, preparing for a case that he was sure of losing, just to see the girl of his dreams.

Pathetic.

--

It had been two weeks since she had found out that Han Joon-Hwi was going to be the prosecutor for her newly-assigned case, and Sol already felt like she was going to drown amidst a sea of precedents, case studies, and more cases that she needed to read just once, in order to keep her client from getting a guilty verdict. She would have to work harder if she needed to beat him, and had even contemplated asking Professor Yang for help, not that the man would do anything to make her life any easier.

Instead, she settles for the next best thing, calls over Sol B and Yeseul for help, and while Sol B grumbles, Yeseul agrees enthusiastically, even offering to bring over Bok-gi for an extra pair of eyes. Not one to be outdone in anything, Sol B offered to bring over Jiho, who grumbled more than Sol B (if that was possible), but agreed to come along nevertheless, and they all sat in her tiny living room, looking as though they had lived there all their lives, and had helped her with the case, although the boys were more interested in devising ways to make Joon-Hwi lose, as Jiho put it, “noona is our best bet, and he owes me food if he loses.” No one could argue with that, honestly.

Except she feels like drowning, and the trial was only two weeks away.

Stupid Joon-Hwi. Why did he have to take my case? Why couldn’t he just remain in civil law? Why did he have to do this? Why, why, why?

She knew that she was being irrational. He didn’t have much control over the cases he was assigned to, and given the fact that the prosecutor in charge had been admitted to the hospital, she doesn’t think he had any sort of control over what cases he would be assigned to. Still.

You’re being irrational now, a voice that sounds surprisingly like Professor Yang’s pipes up in her mind, you’re being distracted right now, Kang Sol. You won’t win if you’re distracted.

Right. She turns back to her papers, trying her best to push the thoughts out of her mind.

I can’t be distracted.

—

He was distracted.

It wasn’t his fault, perhaps, but Joon-Hwi feels guilty nevertheless, especially as he stares at his two paralegals who are stuck alongside him, working into the night.

He’s been staring at the same picture for the past thirty minutes. In his mind, it qualifies as work, but what sort, he isn’t sure. It’s a picture from their graduation day, the seven of them (Seung-Jae hyung was behind the camera) and Professors Kim and Yang, Yangcrates even had a rare smile, something which he hadn’t ever imagined witnessing, at least not sober. Him with his arm around Jiho, who clearly didn’t want to be dragged into a conversation then, his attention focused on someone else. Sol B, staring straight into the camera, grinning ear to ear. Bok-gi and Ye-beom, the latter gesticulating wildly and Bok-gi just laughing at him, Yeseul with her head thrown back in laughter, and Sol—Sol was radiant, (he laughs at that, radiant, the Greek meaning fitting her like a glove, Sol, the Sun) the way she smiled at the camera, her hand held up in a peace sign. It was an imperfect picture, and he has the final, proper version hung on his living room wall, but it’s the warmest picture he has ever been in.

The trial is the next day, and he should be getting some sleep, but he finds himself staying awake even after his two paralegals have gone home, apologising profusely for leaving him alone, and then he takes out his phone, which has been blowing up with messages from Bok-gi and Jiho, asking to come out with them for dinner. He knows it’s a bad idea, that they would try and get him drunk, or worse, that he would voluntarily get drunk, and showing up hungover at the courthouse isn’t a great idea.

Except… he really wants to do so. It’s like he’s back in university again, trying to find ways to rile Kang Sol up, teasing her, to revel in the way she would get angry with him for cutting short her study times, even though she should have been in bed three hours prior. She would always look at him with that strange sort of expression in her eyes, Joon-Hwi remembers, as if she couldn’t decide whether to hit him or to just kiss him and shut him up.

His phone pings, and it’s a text from Jiho, telling him that hyung, do you want to come out for dinner? Sol’s buying.

He really shouldn’t. even if it had taken him a moment to know which Kang Sol Jiho had been talking about and even then, he couldn’t stop his heart from skipping a beat at the mention of her name, he shouldn’t.

Oi, Han Joon-Hwi, aren’t you a little too old and a little too responsible to be drinking before the day of an important trial?

The voice in his head sounds suspiciously like Sol, not Sol B—Sol A, although he doesn’t know how anyone could confuse themselves between the two—they were as different as light and day, and the one on his mind was not the one who was offering to buy him drinks and dinner. He sighs, texting Jiho a quick apology before he heads out of the office. He needs to be alone tonight, trying to get his thoughts in order before he faced Kang Sol in the courthouse the next day.

Even though he’s sure to lose, he just might win.

--

[seamayweed]

To answer wusopiejung25:

Both Bang-won and his father are very charismatic people who both pursue the vision of a better country, so it doesn't really surprise me that they both have so many supporters - including Hwi and Hui-jae in Bang-won's case. I can't blame Hwi for supporting Bang-won either (despite Bang-won's bigotry/open discrimination of bastards) since, at least until the last ep, Bang-won appeared to be the only person in power who had never abandoned him.

While Bang-won sheds the blood of innocents just like his father, the difference is that it takes a toll on Bang-won who will live with the guilt forever? And in at least that, he's better and preferable to YSG who doesn't really seem to care at all. There's also the fact that YSG used him to do his dirty work/shed blood for him in the past and has been a very cold, loveless, negligent and manipulative parent to Bang-won who desperately craves his love and was vulnerable to his manipulations for a long time, which makes the latter far more sympathetic than the former. You could also argue that Bang-won only became a monster because of YSG.

And yeah, they really did make Nam Jeon almost comically evil (despite his dream of a country of subjects) to make Hwi and Hui-jae side with Bang-won lol.

(Rather, the more impossible, unbelievable thing to me is that Seon-ho didn't seem to have any supporters at all aside from Sung-rok despite having ideals for a better country just like Bang-won, YSG, Nam Jeon etc. + possessing an unearthly beauty that poets would write songs about + knowing how to be charming too as shown in the first two eps, not to mention his penchant for grand speeches like with Sung-rok or the Jurchens in the Northern Township later on. Who wouldn't fall in love with him and swear their life and eternal loyalty to him?? But I digress haha.)

To get back to OP's points:

1. The tragedy of it all ended up being that Hwi was never Bang Won's person, or anyone's - he was always stubbornly his own. And so we get that ending.

The thing is that Bang-won betrayed Hwi first - in fact, he has betrayed and deceived Hwi from the start. He is the one who proved himself not to be Hwi's person or someone trustworthy or worthy of being followed by him. Hwi was willing to support Bang-won and be his person as long as Bang-won kept his end of the deal and didn't abandon him or his people as every other person in power had already done so far - he even said he wanted to save both Seon-ho AND Bang-won when he still believed Bang-won to be his person. Why is Hwi expected to blindly follow Bang-won and be his person in spite of that? Why is Hwi expected to be Bang-won's person when Bang-won isn't Hwi's person and turns out to have never been his person at all? Also there's honestly nothing wrong with being your own person?? It's extremely telling that Bang-won kills him for that - because he can't have him. What does that make him if not a tyrant?

2. PS It is so bleak how even taking responsibility for one's monstrous acts is a rarity in their world.

In what way, exactly, does Bang-won take responsibility for his monstrous acts?

He says here that all the blood shed under his orders will be on his hands and his hands only, but -

What's this then?

3. One cannot imagine YSG saying that, you know.

On the contrary - I think that's very much something that YSG would say too. He is the king of PR as the beloved war hero and general who beat back the Red Turbans and whom children sang songs about and whom the population opened the gates for when he returned with his army from Wihwado to take the capital; if we think back to the beginning episodes, he was a widely admired hero who believed in social mobility and even gave Hwi the broken half of his red arrow so he could apply for the military exam instead of getting excluded due to discrimination. Also they are just that: words. Anyone can say them. It's the actions that you have to pay attention to.

As established in the previous point, Bang-won's actions are very much the opposite of his words.

One last thing:

(the subs are a bit funky, but it should be "your" and not "our" lmao)

While I don't think Bang-won is wholly to blame for killing Poeun and Seo Geom (those were clearly done on indirect orders of YSG and to protect his family), the rest is very much on him. Again: In what way, exactly, does Bang-won take responsibility for his monstrous acts? By feeling guilty about it?? By getting taunted by others about it???

More grand words that do not match his actions at all! In what way does he own up to it? By historically killing even more people and family/relatives who get in his way once he becomes king?? Going down in history as the kinslayer and tyrant he was is NOT owning up to his actions - not to mention that people still praise him for consolidating the power of the monarchy and for being the father of King Sejong the Great; he NEVER actually gets punished for his actions!

To be truthful, I had to laugh and thought it was rich for him to talk about getting taunted and how painful it is in front of Seon-ho of all people.

Especially since he was among those to constantly taunt Seon-ho about his status as a half-lowborn bastard and discriminate against him, threatening him and people like him with incarceration, disenfranchisement and disempowerment.

I'm sorry, but living with the guilt of your own actions and choices and getting (rightfully) called out/mocked for that is nothing compared to getting mocked/discriminated all your life due to bigotry because of something you can't help: being born a slave who by a stroke of luck (or bad luck, depending on your perspective) is lifted to the status of a half-lowborn bastard!

As Seon-ho would say -

Bang-won is very much a hypocrite and deluded in his own way too - and I actually like that about him!! I think it makes him an extremely complex and fascinating character and a very compelling foil to Seon-ho and vice-versa.

This is a very interesting scene in retrospect because both BW and SH prove to be correct.

The tragedy of it all ended up being that Hwi was never Bang Won's person, or anyone's - he was always stubbornly his own. And so we get that ending.

But that thread runs throughout, doesn't it?

(That's a spectacular response on BW's part btw. I ship it.)

PS It is so bleak how even taking responsibility for one's monstrous acts is a rarity in their world.

One cannot imagine YSG saying that, you know.