#he's kinda salty with Rick (understandable)

[scoliosisgoblin]

Smith family doodles

[anomura]

imagine being rick riordan and writing a whole ass arc for jason and nico, them going from not trusting each other at all to jason trying to befriend nico and worrying about him to an entire scene where they hug and it’s a Big Deal just to throw it all in the trash, not develop their relationship any further and then, to top it all off, kill jason. couldn’t be me

[incorrectnorse-quotes]

I was thinking about this earlier today and wanted to share it. In the magnus chase books even though rick goes with portraying Loki as a sociopath and Sigyn as the abused but still defiant wife, we do get something of a proxy logyn relationship through Magnus and Alex. One is the playful ever changing person who refuses to compromise who they are for anyone. And the other is a super salty sunshine child who holds off ragnarok through love, loyalty, and consistency.

Couldn’t have said this better myself! You know, when it’s put out like this, I sort of understand why Rick did that with Sigyn and Loki. That contrast was necessary for the narrative he was trying to build, with Loki as a villain and Alex representing what he could’ve been had he gone down a better road, and Fierrochase representing the “good version” of the relationship between him and Sigyn. Although, I still think that Sigyn, specifically, could have been portrayed much differently and this same narrative could have still worked. She could have been more similar to Loki, there could’ve been two morally grey villains who actually show feelings for each other instead of one completely corrupt villain and his innocent, martyred wife who he berates and ignores.

That “parallel” with Magnus is also kinda one of the things that contribute to my vision of Sigyn as a Vanir/Daughter of Freyja tbh. 

[youngbugandtonystank]

Why marvel fans love Pepper but hate gwyneth? Someone on twitter said she was the most unrelatable celeb ever and in a magazine, people labeled her the most hated woman on earth. Did she do something problematic? Or she a Trump supporter?

You know, years ago I was kinda curious as to why everyone hated her so much. She's listed as Hollywood's most hated actress too. She's always on one of those lists. 

Why Do So Many People Hate Gwyneth Paltrow?

Gwyneth Paltrow is perfectly aware of how obnoxious she can seem

Gwyneth Paltrow responds to that time a magazine named her The Most Hated Celebrity in the World

Why does everyone hate Gwyneth Paltrow?

Gwyneth Paltrow on Being the Most Hated Celebrity

And the list goes on.

Some people think she practices some dangerous spiritual teachings and she's giving people the wrong information. They also think she heavily promotes and sells questionable things that could be potentially dangerous. In some sense, this is true because medical professionals have been asked to check the products over. The majority of them say the products are not backed up by science and state that these items are actually dangerous. I think that she looks like a scammer in the eyes of other people because she sometimes falsely advertises her business and products. 

Some others say her cosmetics are way overpriced and really bad for your skin. I heard a drama about some healing stickers, etc. As a spiritual person myself, I can't really judge that much until I see her Netflix show so I can't really agree or disagree in this matter.

About the other things. After doing some investigation, I found out the real reason. At first, I thought it was some quirky personality trait but then I saw most of her interviews, press conferences, and her business promos. She's not a bad person but she's definitely a little out of touch. I'm guessing because she grew up in a wealthy environment, she rules out some stuff when talking about sensitive topics. I take her as a "Paris Hilton, Kim K, and Mariah Carey" personality type, you know? Like, she puts up on a funny sophisticated diva-like personality but she's different in private. It’s funny because some people hate her but have no problems buying Kylie’s overpriced products either. I buy their products, mostly because I love skincare and makeup but you don’t see me hating on them. 

I once saw a comment under one of her interviews saying: ‘and after watching this you think this woman is not married to Tony Stark?’ hahahahah. And gotta say, she's really funny lmaooo the other day I saw her in her youtube cooking show section (part of the Goop brand, I guess), she was doing holiday snacks. She started saying that anyone could do the ‘simple’ recipes at home and that they were practical or something like that. After saying that, you'd think she was about to do some Christmas cookies or some family recipe, instead, she put caviar on a chip and put the ‘snack’ on a fancy white plate lmaooooooooo I died and went to heaven. You can imagine the rest of the ‘holiday snacks’ that followed after that one. I'm not exactly rich as hell but let's just say I'm doing great with my finances thanks to my job (I thank God for that every day) so I'm usually around people like her, and this is why I can tell she's not a bad person, just out of touch. And what do I mean by that? Let me give you an example, after doing her ‘holiday snack lmao’ she started talking about how caviar is not necessarily expensive, she said that you don't exactly have to sell a limb to buy it and proceeded to say that she always serves the same thing at parties and that it's easy and practical to make. You get what I mean? For her, it's not a problem because she can afford it but for others, of course, it is. These kinds of comments come off as self-absorbed for other people. 

Another one, let's just put the children's hospital example this time, any other person would bring toys, medical support, or coloring books, someone like Gwyneth would bring expensive silk pillows, salty crackers, or scented vanilla candles lmao. I'm not saying she's doing it on purpose, I think she's not aware she's doing something inaccessible for others because she's always in that mindset/environment. For her, it's not something harmful. Same with the avengers thing, you have Tom Holland saying ‘thank you’ and ‘I'm lucky to be here’ every five seconds when talking about his experience in the franchise, Robert saying he wouldn't be where he is without the amazing actors surrounding him; always making sure to give them an opportunity to shine, Elizabeth Olsen moved to tears when a fan tells her that Wanda is her daily inspiration, Don Cheadle talking about how the Avengers movies have been the experience of a lifetime and how fortunate he is to be part of something so big. Gwyneth, on the other side, forgets she was even in the movies, gives spoilers without a filter in a movie that is the result of 11 years of hard work about her and Tony's characters (this is how I found out Morgan was real btw like months before the movie even if I also suspected they were going to do this years ago), and forgets her co-stars names to the point they have to reintroduce themselves to her LMFAO I get that the marvel franchise is not her entire life and focus, but I think you get the point I'm trying to make. Or, she could be doing this on purpose to troll her haters. 

She always does that. With everything. You just have to watch some of her interviews and you're going to be able to tell.

Someone on twitter said she was the most unrelatable celeb ever

Some people get mad when their fave turns out to be different in real life. Those people can't separate the fictional character from the actor/actress. Of course, she's not going to be like Pepper, I get that but some stans irrationally hate her for practically breathing. I understand that some of her opinions and actions seem a little materialistic and pretentious but she's not attacking anyone in particular. It's annoying? Sure, sometimes. Who wants to hear someone talk about their wealthy lifestyle when discussing sensitive or normal topics? No one. People love someone who they can relate to but you gotta understand Gwyneth is not doing it because she thinks she's better than you. That's just how her lifestyle is. Waaaay different than ours. The same applies to the other actors. You really think we're closer to having Zendaya's lifestyle only because we can relate to some of her jokes, because she wears baggy hipster clothes or because she uses less expensive skincare products for a ‘go to bed with me’ harper's bazaar video? (I love those videos btw lmao) No sweetheart, after doing an interview or those vids, they get escorted by their private security guards to the limo/expensive car waiting for them with a chauffeur ready to drive them to a photoshoot with vogue. Is that your typical Tuesday? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Or that we're one and the same with Sebastian Stan because he eats burgers on Thursdays and watches Rick and Morty in pajamas? (no idea if this is true, just an example) No. Of course not. They're celebrities, they get paid for showing their faces to the public. A simple statement out of them can make people talk about them for days. A simple selfie can turn into a Twitter trend. They're human? Sure, we have to respect that 100% but their lifestyle is totally different and this is something we should be aware of too. So we can't really expect Gwyneth to act just like us. I'm sure most of us would act the same as her if we were born in gold and caviar.

I once defended her in a YouTube comment section and some dudebro got angry at me and called me an ‘obsessive pepper x tony’ fan. *stares at the camera like in the office* I don't even ship pepperony lmaooooo

And I don’t know if she’s a Trump supporter, I’m going to dig around to see if this is true. 

So there you go, that's my opinion. And no, I don't care if you agree or not (this is not for you, op) it's an opinion, chill.

[underdressedgoth]

This is older art that I finally finished (it was first made in September before Goretober and I finally finish it like 2 months later)

I’m choosing now to properly introduce these kids (and a new one too) as the “Multiple Dimentional Craze” fanchildren. (this is going to be a very long post)

Sapphire

Parents: Morty and Riley *oc* Full Name: Sapphire ‘June’ Smith Nicknames: Saphie Birthday: November 17 Age: 16 Species: Human Blood Type: A+ Height: 5′7ft Sexuality: Lesbian Personality: Rude, Courageous, Rebellious, Loyal, Hot-headed, Impatient, Intelligent, Arrogant, Protective, Honest (very brutally honest), prideful, strong, confident, leader-like Powers: N/A Family: Morty *Father*, Rylie *Mother* [Out of the picture], Rick *Great-Grandfather*, Beth *Grandmother*, Jerry *Grandfather* and Summer *Aunt* Friends: Monster, Pinecone, Pineneedle, Mars, Mercury, Bruno, Leah and Josie Dating: Mayflower Likes: Her girlfriend, stir fry, the color magenta, warm foods, science related subjects, math related subjects, cats, sweet and salty foods Dislikes: Emiko, Evelyn, Takei, Victor, London, Samara, Morty, Samantha, P.J, Lee- you know what she hates like ⅞ of my fanchildren we could be here all day if I had to list everyone she doesn’t like, rain, wet items, spicy foods, sour foods, chunky things- okay so she really doesn’t like a lot of things either (you get the point) Other Things: -Her hair is naturally blue, Morty was concerned that she was Rick’s kid (considering the reason why they had split up), but nope. Morty’s her Dad. -Her parents are separated (Her mother cheated on Morty with multiple people) -She doesn’t like most people (it’s considered an accomplishment if someone managed to get on her good list. Which is -by the way- very small) -She pretty much hates Morty, a lot. She has a lot of resentment towards him, mainly because she hasn’t seen her mother since she was 5. (While Morty wants to tell her that he had tried to get her mother to see her, her mother is pretty much a dead-beat parent who doesn’t give a flying fuck that her daughter exists. He knows Sapphire probably won’t believe him) -While they may be friends, Sapphire likes to pick on and bully Mars. But just because she likes to bully him, doesn’t mean she won’t beat up a person who makes fun of him (it’s like a sibling-love thing. Everyone who has a sibling here should know what I mean) -She looks up to Rick, much to her family’s (including Rick’s) dismay, she always wanted to go adventuring with him but he always declines (thus making her frustrated) -Sometimes will steal things from her Great-Grandfather without him knowing until she’s already gone with it (one of the normal things she usually steals is the portal gun -While most of her friends have powers, she’s not jealous, in fact that only makes her more confident in herself since she knows how strong she really is (thus making her even more scary knowing that she’s just as strong as her powerful friends) -She has a soft spot for her friends and girlfriend -There are very few people on her bad list that she respects (one for example being Takei) -She’s pretty well known around her school as a girl who never knows when to step down, the amount of fights she was in prove said statement She has known Pinecone and Pineneedle since they were babies, Mayflower and Monster since 5, Mars since 6, Bruno and Mercury since 7

Monster

Parents: Wirt and The Beast Full Name: Monster ‘Edelwood’ Oak Nicknames: Monty Birthday: January 31 Age: 15 Species: Demon/Human Blood Type: [Redacted] Height: 5′8ft Sexuality: Heterosexual Personality: Calm, Collected, Optimistic, Peaceful, Caring, Protective, Observant, Quiet, Diplomatic, Introverted, Fair-Minded Powers: +Plant Talk- Can talk to plants and understand what they’re saying +Nature control- Able to control any plant around her or even make pants appear out of nowhere +Shadow Camouflage- Using her shadow form, she can blend into any surface she so chooses as long as she doesn’t use it while in sunlight +Night vision- While using her real eyes, she can see clearly in the dark. It only works with her real eyes though, while in her human disguise she can’t see in the dark +Shape-shift- Whether it be in her human disguise or natural form, she can also turn into any animal she can think of +Enhanced smell- Can smell twice as good as a blood-hound. Helps when smelling for blood or souls +Angel’s Voice- Like with the beast, she can sing to draw prey towards her along with drain any bravery or hope from them +Underwater breathing- Can breathe underwater (she didn’t know she could until the age of 6 when Mars went out too far and nearly drowned. Wirt nearly had a heart-attack that day but was grateful she could do that) Family: Wirt *Father*, Beast *Father*, Sara *Step-mother*, Max *little half-brother*, Lantern *little half-sister*, Greg *Uncle* Friends: Sapphire, Mayflower, Pinecone, Pineneedle, Bruno, Mars, Mercury, Armory, Echomain Crush: Mars Likes: Tea, Poety, Nature, Music, Rivers, Exploring, Her Family and Friends, Old Things, Books, Walking through the woods, Singing, cold weather, English subjects, Art, Musicals Dislikes: Very hot weather, her friends/family getting injured, cheese (no one knows why, she just doesn’t like it), bright lights Other Things: -She’s carnivorous, won’t eat any plants unless she has to (a funny way to put it is that she’s like a reverse vegan) - Her favorite poet is Sara Teasdale - She got her love for poetry from Wirt, ever since she was a baby, Wirt would read poetry to her. Beast also would sometimes recite Shakespeare to her when she was a child while she visited him - She can easily retell Hamlet from memory word-for-word (she’s read and heard Shakespeare so many times that she can do that with any of his stories) - She’s in her school’s chorus (Known to be a very beautiful singer) - Her favorite type of music is Opera (no surprise there) - Once a week (sometimes two) every other month, she and Wirt would go visit the beast. Sara does know about this as she was there when the deal was first offered - She has never actually spent a halloween in the real world - Monster was born out of a giant flower - Sometimes out of habit from her demonic heritage, Monster will eat either a bird or small animal (Mayflower and Mars are the only ones who seem to freak out when that happens) - Has been playing Piano, cello, Clarinet and bass since she was little (she loves playing instruments) - Sometimes if she’s deep in thought, she’ll start talking in Shakespearean - Is an outcast at her school because people find her very weird with her personality and hobby with plants (Since she likes to whisper to them a lot). - - - - While Wirt may have reacted differently to a situation like hers, she doesn’t seem to be bothered by it at all. Nor does she acknowledge the insults other students will sometimes say about her. Sapphire on the other hand, has been in many fights because she refuses to let anyone bully her friend - Monster loves her half-siblings to death, she’ll do anything for them. Her brother Max sadly doesn’t like her since she gets most of Wirt’s attention - Her brother doesn’t know she’s not fully human, her sister on the other hand found out through her own ways (she’s very young so she’s fine with it, in fact she thinks Monster is cool and lucky to have powers as she wishes she had them too) -She’s mainly nocturnal, but since she can’t really sleep during the day often either, her body luckily managed to readjust itself so she doesn’t need to sleep often. - She doesn’t really express much inner emotions, so it’s not obvious that she has a crush on Mars (only people who know are Sapphire and Mayflower) - Has known Pinecone and Pineneedle since they were babies, Mayflower since she was 4, Bruno and Mercury since 5, Mars since 6 and Sapphire since 4 - She’s considered a theater kid (the theater kids are probably the only ones out of her school who actually like her) - Funny thing, she can walk on water (another thing to add, it took Wirt forever to let her into the water, he was just that terrified if she drowned.) -She can’t see well in bright lighting, her eyes don’t adjust well to it -She sees Sara like an actual mother to her -Seems to bleed Oil,Gold and Blood

Mayflower

Parents: Connie and Spinel Full Name: Mayflower ‘Spinel’ Maheswaran-Universe Nick names: May, Curly, Petal Birthday: February 28 Age: 14 Species: Gem/Human Blood Type: [Redacted] Height: 5′3ft Sexuality: Bisexual Personality: Self-conscious, Joyful, Caring, Nurturing, Optimistic, Friendly, sometimes nervous, self-less, strong Powers: + Rejuvinator- can easily pull out her own rejuvinator from her gem (it can also double as a weapon to fight against other creatures, electrocuting and cutting any enemy she swings it at) +Stretchy Limbs- Like her mother Spinel, she can stretch any part of her body (as long as she doesn’t over do it, she’s fine) + Fusion- like her father Steven who is also half-gem, she can fuse with any gem or human Family: Spinel *Mother*, Connie *Mother*, Steven *Step-Father*, Nicholas *Older Half-Brother*, Stephen *Little Half-Brother*, Greg *Little Half-Brother*, Greg *Step-Grandfather*, Pink Diamond/Rose Quartz *Step-Grandmother*, Priyanka *Grandmother*, Doug *Grandfather* Friends: Pinecone, Pineneedle, Mercury, Bruno, Mars, Monster Dating: Sapphire Likes: Dancing, Singing, Traveling the Multiverse, Animals, any romantic comedy or novels, painting, Homeworld, space travel, space itself, anything funny, gardening Dislikes: Her looks, Monster attempting to eat a small creature, abandon buildings, taking pictures of herself (she gets flustered from them), horror movies, silence, being alone, blood, anyone getting hurt Other Things: -She isn’t really one who is confident with her looks, she isn’t exactly thin (she’s kinda chubby) and it does bother her sometimes (Sapphire still loves her to death and will kill anyone who makes fun of her girlfriend without hesitation or remorse. Sapphire would do anything for and I mean anything) -She and Sapphire have been dating for about 2 years now (for the one who has confessed their love to the other, they both were just flustered stuttering messes as Sapphire sucks with emotions besides anger and Mayflower is not one who has confidence) - Her older brother doesn’t like her, she tries her best, just like Monster with her own brother, to get her brother to not hate her (he’s just edgy) - She has her own gem, a spinel like her mother Spinel’s (spinel didn’t give up her form, it turns out from what I heard, Rose didn’t have to give up her form for Steven. So I am just using that idea for here too) - Since Steven, Spinel and Connie are in a polygamous relationship, Steven likes to help Mayflower understand her own powers since he can relate of course) - I can definitely assure that the Diamonds like to smother her and her brothers with love since they are Spinel’s and Steven’s kids (same can go with Pearl) - Doesn’t seem like it to others, but Mayflower is really strong, she can lift a lot since she likes to work out sometimes

Pinecone

Parents: Bill and Dipper Full Name: Pinecone ‘Pyramid’ Cipher-Pines Nick names: Pinie, PC, Creepy, Gremlin #1, Cone Birthday: May 23 Age: 13 Species: Demon/Human Blood Type: [Redacted] Height: 5ft Sexuality: Heterosexual Personality: Creepy, Hyper, Observant, Extroverted, Goofy, Creative, observant, curious, courageous, adventurous, chaotic good, crafty Powers: +Shapeshift- Can shape-shift into anything from her demon form to any small objects +Portals- Can manifest a portal to the multiverse +Enhanced smell- can smell better than humans +Telekinesis- Move things with her mind +Floating- Can float Family: Bill *Father*, Dipper *”Mother”*, Pineneedle *Twin brother*, Gravity *Little brother*, Falls *Little sister*, Mabel *Aunt*, Pacifica *Aunt*, Aqua Marie *Cousin*, Manuel *Cousin*, Tala Poly *Aunt*, Lillusion *Aunt* Friends: Sapphire, Mayflower, Monster, Bruno, Mars, Mercury, Gabriel, Flint Crush: Max Likes: Forests, Dark areas, Halloween, Bugs, Camping, Fire, Bones, Traveling through dimensions and universes, anything sugar, Tad Strange, scissors, disturbing things, Birch trees Dislikes: Being Normal, having to sit still, London (surprisingly), snobby people, having to pretend to be human, pineapples, fancy things (finds them boring) Other Things: -Is older than Pineneedle by 6 minutes - Tad Strange is her’s and Pineneedle’s teacher (secretly since Bill hates Tad) - While she likes Monster’s little brother, most people will say she has a very “strange” way of showing her affection towards her (that being a very creepy way, what I mean is that she’ll say the creepiest things to him since she for some reason “finds his face adorable when it looks scared”) (she won’t hurt him, just freak him out. Added note, he doesn’t like her at all. Her love for him is very one-sided. But she is determined to win him over one day) - She and Pineneedle were not planned, they kinda just happened by accident (their parents still love both of them none-the-less) - Knows about other fanchildren in other universes, enjoys talking to them

Pineneedle

Parents: Bill and Dipper Full Name: Pineneedle ‘Illuminati’ Cipher-Pines Nick names: PN, Gremlin #2, Pointer, Needle Birthday: May 23 Age: 13 Species: Demon/Human Blood Type: [Redacted] Height: 5ft Sexuality: Aromantic/bisexual Personality: Creepy, Hyper, Observant, Extroverted, Goofy, Creative, chaotic, courageous, adventurous, Chaotic good, disobedient Powers: +Shapeshift- Can shape-shift into anything from her demon form to any small objects +Portals- Can manifest a portal to the multiverse +Enhanced smell- can smell better than humans +Telekinesis- Move things with her mind +Floating- Can float Family: Bill *Father*, Dipper *”Mother”*, Pinecone *Twin sister*, Gravity *Little brother*, Falls *Little sister*, Mabel *Aunt*, Pacifica *Aunt*, Aqua Marie *Cousin*, Manuel *Cousin*, Tala Poly *Aunt*, Lillusion *Aunt* Friends: Sapphire, Mayflower, Monster, Bruno, Mars, Mercury, Gabriel, Flint Crush: N/A Likes: Anything creepy, slim, spiders, snakes, mice, being crazy, scaring others, Tad Strange Dislikes: Having to be “normal”, not using his powers, rules, girly things Other Things: -Almost like he’s Pinecone’s other half, sharing similar personalities and abilities - He’s the younger twin - Where ever one twin is, the other follows (Pinecone and Pineneedle are rarely apart) - The more troublesome of the two (and that is saying something) - While Pinecone likes Max, Needle just likes to scare him - He can be very spiteful - Thinks love is gross (doesn’t understand it) - likes to skateboard with Mercury - He and Pinecone have known everyone since they were babies (they’re the little siblings of the group)

Mars

Parents: Dib and Zim Full Name: Mars ‘Irken’ Membrane Nick names: Nerd, Markie, Dork (<--- Two are from Sapphire) Birthday: July 15 Age: 16 Species: Alien/Human Blood Type: [Redacted] Height: 5′8ft Sexuality: Heterosexual Personality: Introverted, Anxious, Intelligent, Quiet, Friendly, Nerdy, Dorky Powers: +Breath in space- Yeah, that’s the only thing I think he can do Family: Zim *Parent*, Dib *Father*, Zoey *Little Sister* Gaz *Aunt*, Tak *Aunt*, Dr.Membrane *Grandfather* Friends: Sapphire, Mayflower, Monster, Mercury, Bruno, Pinecone, Pineneedle Crush: Monster Likes: School (because he likes learning), technology, building things, studying, science and math related subjects Dislikes: Sapphire’s rage, moving quickly, the dark (he’s scared of it), oranges (hates the smell), Gym (he’s not that strong) Other Things: -Often gets picked on by Sapphire (though they do have their moments where they get along) (he’s not scared of her, just annoyed) - While Dib may be a proud space scientist, Mars prefers not to be acknowledged as his son for some odd reason - He doesn’t enjoy fighting other creatures, he can handle it, just doesn’t like it like the others do - He has motion sickness, move way too quickly and he’ll get nauseous - Sapphire is the reason for why he’s scared of the dark - He wears make-up to hide the green parts of his skin (the only time he doesn’t is in Gravity falls) - He has only been to space once, didn’t have fun at all (1/10 wouldn’t recommend) - Monster gave him his beanie for his birthday a few years ago, he loves it - He’s your typical shy nerd

Mercury

Parents: Star and Jackie Full Name: Mercury ‘Lynn‘ Butterfly Nick names: Flutter, Wings, Meri, Sparkles Birthday: August 2 Age: 15 Species: Mewman/Human Blood Type: [Redacted] Height: 5′6ft Sexuality: Pansexual Personality: Out-going, extroverted, bashful, prideful, forceful, somewhat thoughtless at times, crafty, wild Powers: +Butterfly- Butterfly form from Mewberty +Magic wand- since it’s connected to her powers they have similar spells (I am not going to list them because that’ll take too long) Family: Star *Mother*, Jackie *Mother*, Moon *Grandmother*, River *Grandfather* Friends: Sapphire, Mayflower, Monster, Mars, Bruno, Pinecone, Pineneedle, Samantha, Anne, Evelyn, Gabriel, Black Taffy- she’s pretty much the opposite of Sapphire when it comes to people, she has a lot of friends Crush: Samantha Likes: Glitter (a lot), Shiny things, roller-blading, magic, Mewni, crazy things, summer, bright collars, dancing, sugar, hot coco, socializing, parties Dislikes: Unicorns (from her experience with them, you’d hate them too), Fairies (again, from her experience with them, you wouldn’t blame her), gnomes, garden gnomes (don’t ask), bland foods, snakes, magical high commission, her ex boyfriend (oh how the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree) Other Things: -Just going to ignore what happened in the finale because I personally thought it sucked and was a terrible way to end a series. Mercury is the heir to the Butterfly throne. - While she is a girl who can easily make friends, she is one who also tends to loose some due to her nature, she doesn’t understand boundaries and tends to drive people away occasionally - She knows a lot of Royal people and will 100% try to befriend any princes or princesses while she can - She loves to talk, a lot, she is very rarely quiet and it tends to drive Sapphire crazy and threaten to duck-tape her mouth shut - Sometimes the others think she depends on her want a little too much, because she uses it all the time even when she doesn’t need too at all - Despite being a very confident girl, when it comes to interacting with her crush (Samantha), she’s a stuttering flustered mess - Please don’t give her sugar

Bruno

Parents: Tom and Marco Full Name: Bruno ‘Julius‘ Lucitor-Diaz Nick names: Bunny, Demon-boy, Lucitor, Horns (<--- Most of these are from Sapphire) Birthday: March 30 Age: 16 Species: Demon/Mewman/Human Blood Type: [Redacted] Height: 5′8ft Sexuality: Heterosexual Personality: Calm, Brave, Determined, Good-hearted, Responsible, Dare-devil, Leader-like, Assertive (when needed), Confident Powers: +Fire- able to produce fire from hands and have it spread to anywhere on his body Family: Tom *Father*, Marco *Father*, Juliet *little sister*, Mariposa *Aunt*, Rafael *Grandfather*, Angie *Grandmother*, Wrathmelior *Grandmother* and Dave *Grandfather* Friends: Sapphire, Mayflower, Pinecone, Pineneedle, Monster, Mars, Mercury, Black Taffy, Josie, Jack Jr, Crush: N/A Likes: Biking, fire, Tacos, Nachos, Magical creatures, adventure, Ice-skating Dislikes: Math, school, fancy parties, dressing up, London, Mercury on sugar Other Things: -He’s sorta bad at judging things -Often butts heads with Sapphire due to both of their desires to lead the friend group - He has a third eye hidden under his hair -Has three moles in a row from largest to smallest under his right eye - Has his own pair of Dimensional scissors - Lives in the Underworld as the prince and heir to the throne - Is the only one besides Pinecone, Pineneedle and Monster, who is able to handle Mercury - Has known Mercury since the day of her birth, Pinecone and Pineneedle since they were babies, Sapphire since 7, Monster since 6 - He doesn’t really like most demons or hybrids, most of the time they’re too crazy for him to deal with (he already has to deal with 3 crazy people almost everyday. He’s good) - He’s pretty good at flattering people, he’s calls it his “secret weapon” - He likes to consider Sapphire as his rival (Sapphire feels the same way towards him) I’ll admit I got lazy with some parts because writing this was taking too long after loosing a good chunk of progress and having to redo some profiles because of it. This would have been posted sooner if it weren’t for that.

[lupienne]

Warning: rambling salt post about TV TWD ahead. Honestly, this is like literal thought diarrhea here.

As ya’ll know, I’m not really invested in TWD show anymore. I mainly only watch it because my mom does (and I got her into it XD). So I’ll sit there and draw or chat online or whatnot while it’s on. So it’s not like I’m hardcore into it, and it’s really just a source of irritation or eye-rolling for me at this point. (The new intro is badass though. Can we get a total reboot and have it animated in that style and follow the comics (but with more character development))

OK ANYWAY.

So as usual, I have contempt for the stuff they’re doing with Negan. Lol. I mean, the writers shot themselves in the foot by killing Carl and they’re kinda screwed by Rick’s exit. Two characters that have bonds with Negan and ‘know’ Negan. Carl came down and talked for years with Negan in his cell. Rick and Negan had a much more... dynamic relationship in the comics - they were the nemesis... not Negan & Daryl and sometimes Rick, but just Negan and Rick. Negan and Rick have a long history at this point. They’re... familiar with each other. Rick and Negan tried to out-cat-and-mouse each other in All Out War, they both did nasty things to each other’s people, and they both had their people’s survival in mind. Thus, they understand each other. Rick also kept Negan alive for the sake of his son. Carl wanted to kill Negan. Rick told him no. ‘We don’t have to live in that world anymore - where we just kill. We can be better but we can still punish him.’ He didn’t want a world where his son thought death was the answer and death was just... the norm. Accepted. Nothing to shrug over.

Of course, the writers fucked this up by killing Carl on the show. They used Simon as a scapegoat for the Oceanside stuff to try to make Negan look ‘not so bad’. But they must have realized how cardboard they made this character of Negan. No care for his people, no sense of doing this just to protect them. No, he treated them like shit. So they desperately scrabble for something to make Negan human... oh, ok....yeah, he had a wife, Lucille! Ok, we’ll use that! We’ll take every opportunity to shove Lucille into the audience’s face. Because we have to have some way to make Negan human and relatable!

They don’t have: oh, he was protecting his people. They don’t have the back-and-forth shit where Negan only ‘went to war’ after Rick tried to kill him. And then he only attacked Alexandria with grenades after Rick brought a fucking herd to Sanctuary, knocked down the walls and left Negan and his people - many who were innocent people including children - at the risk of being overrun, eaten, starved, etc. (I didn’t watch Season 8 so correct me if I’m wrong on this shit not happening in the show). When Negan returned Carl to Rick - Rick attacked him and Negan only fought back to the point of Rick being subdued. He didn’t beat him. He didn’t punish Rick’s people. When they came to Alexandria for supplies and Rick wasn’t there, Negan and his men stayed in a vacant house... they didn’t harass the Alexandrians (in the show they beat up Aaron? Or maybe Eric...) The point is - Negan was a dick in the comics but he was a dick for his people. Rick could be a dick too... and he was also a dick... for his people.

Anyway, I guess what I’m trying to say is... the stuff with Negan and Michonne... it just doesn’t work. Not the way they’re trying to do it. They’re grasping at this desperate shard of humanity that they left Negan - the fact that he loved his wife. Because they didn’t give him the humanity of caring for and fighting for his people (in a misguided way. Yes.) And as much as I love Negan/Lucille...this being the only shard of humanity is weak. Everyone’s lost someone.

In the comics, he rarely ever talked about Lucille. He talked about her once in the early days. Then he mentioned to Alpha that he ‘lost someone’ and his world fell apart. Talking to Alpha is essentially like burning your diary - nobody’s gonna get to repeat your secret words. Then he talks to Rick about Lucille, again vaguely - worst thing I ever did was leave my wife to rot. It’s not this ‘omg my wife Lucille, who died, mah wife, she died of cancer and I was totally shitty to her and she was an amazing angel!’ It’s not this overkill outpouring to anybody within earshot of him in a ham-handed attempt to make Negan human and vulnerable.

And it was Rick whom he talked to about Lucille. Rick. Like I said above. Rick - who he has a bond with. Who he feels close to. Who he feels kinship with. Who is Michonne? He mentioned that Michonne doesn’t even talk to him. Thus this ‘bond’ they’re trying to make feels very forced and contrived to me. The ‘I care about Carl’ stuff feels contrived too. Negan was seconds away from bashing Carl’s brains in on the show and I’m supposed to feel a bond between them? That’s the problem - they left Negan bereft of being an empathetic character and they left no bonds between he and the other characters. They’re trying to force something that isn’t there. Everything just falls flat to me - keeping Negan alive (why? In the comics I understood it. It made sense.), trying to make Negan ‘human’ by constantly bringing up Lucille and making him actually extremely pitiful, trying to force a relationship out of thin air with Michonne. 

I DUNNO GUYS. This is all over the place. I don’t even know what point I’m trying to make. I don’t even know why I care. I’m still always gonna be salty about TV Neg and how TWD show went down the drain and pissed away the comic content. They could have built up on the comic stuff, elevated it, made it great - instead...they spit on it. They set up the foundations of their house with worm-eaten wood and built that fucking house anyway. I realize AL leaving throws a big stick in the machinery, but if the foundations had been solid... it wouldn’t have collapsed the whole house.

(Like did we really need Oceanside? They are so pointless. The whole ‘killing Saviors’ and Simon slaughtered everyone and basically Oceanside itself... I just hate it. What was wrong with having a moral back-and-forth because Rick’s group killed Negan’s people and Negan’s group killed Rick’s people...? And these two leaders are bullheaded and stubborn because they’re both trying to protect their people and both think they’re right - only for Negan to realize later he was misguided, jaded and his leadership stagnated and stayed in survival ‘dog-eat-dog’ mode even when the world had moved past that...?

[samtheflamingomain]

survivor: edge of bullshit

I’ve been a Super Fan of Survivor since I was 6 years old and the first season aired. I actually re-watched season 1 for the first time since I was 6 a while ago.

But I want to talk about season 38, which just wrapped on Wednesday. 

If you’re even remotely aware of the Survivor fandom, you know the reactions to the winner are mixed at best. Spoilers ahead.

I was firmly in camp “Rick will win” as well as “Rick SHOULD win”. There’s a lot of reasons why, but because he didn’t win, I won’t get into it too much.

Chris won. He’s the only Survivor winner to play only 11 days of the game. He spent the other 28 days sitting on his ass doing literally nothing.

This season’s twist was “Edge of Extinction”. After you’re voted out, you can go to this tiny spit of an island with very little food and absolutely NOTHING to do, with the hopes you’ll get back in the game at 2 points: when there’s 13 players left, and when there’s 5 players left.

Rick won his way back into the game at 13, and Chris, who was voted out THIRD OUT OF EIGHTEEN, came back at final 5, making it final 6. 

I have 3 major problems with his win, but first let’s get something out of the way.

He played the cards he was dealt. He made every move he needed to make to win. Yes, he spent 28 days on EoE, but that’s the twist. It was the theme of the game. He had no control over it. If you were voted out and got back in, you’d have done what you needed to do to convince 13 jury members that you deserved to win too. If you don’t think he deserved to win (and I don’t think he did), that’s a problem to take up with production, fucking up the season with this twist.

But, and this is extremely important, he was GIVEN an immunity idol at FINAL SIX. That, to me, is unforgivable. Why production thought this was a good idea is beyond me. You won your way back into the game, that should be reward enough.

ALSO, he didn’t really need that idol. Rick was a massive threat that everyone had been trying to get rid of for nearly half the game. 

Secondly, Chris is the SOLE reason that Victoria was voted out. He came back from EoE, joined the final 5, and told them straight up that the jury (those who lost their chance at getting back in the game) that Victoria was going to get their votes. This led to her being voted out. I truly believe that if that didn’t happen, she would’ve won.

Finally, Kelley told everyone at EoE that Lauren had an idol. Chris used this knowledge to get her to flush the idol on him when he knew he wasn’t in danger of going home anyway. He played her, and the only way he could’ve done that is because Kelley is a fucking dumbass. Lauren had NO PART in her being voted out, yet the first fucking thing she said when she got to EoE was “Lauren has an idol”. Fuck. Her. 

(I’ve always hated Kelley Wentworth from the first time she played. She’s a terrible player with absolutely no concept of strategy, and if you think otherwise, you’re a complete idiot who doesn’t pay attention. Bitch walked home with an idol in her pocket TWICE. She is not a competent player and I don’t understand why she’s been brought back three fucking times. I hope we never have to see her again.)

Again, Chris played with what he had. And I do believe that, if it had been anyone else who’d gotten back in the game, they too would’ve used all the info they gathered on the Edge to their advantage. So again, it’s a matter of hating the game, not the player.

This season was an absolute mess. The edit was terrible, the finale was entertaining but unsatisfying, and, in the end, I couldn’t tell you a single fucking thing about Chris. Because he was only onscreen for, literally, 4 episodes out of 14. 

I realize that the editors must’ve been losing their minds when it came to how to piece together this season. But they fucked up, bad. They gave ten times as much screen time to the losers that didn’t even make final 3 than they did Julie, Gavin and Chris. And of that final 3, Julie and Gavin had waaaay more screen time than Chris.

Here’s how they should’ve done it: EoE ends at the merge, OR, final 8 or final 7. To bring back this guy nobody remembers in the finale, in ONE EPISODE, was a massive error, and it will easily put this season in (at least my) bottom 15. 

I don’t put a lot of stock into Edgic (the concept of trying to determine the winner based on how visible and positive their content is, how many confessionals they get, etc.) but it has been largely correct in seasons past.

If I had to guess, less than 10% of people who watch Survivor religiously would’ve guessed Chris would win. And for casual viewers? They probably left the finale going “who the fuck is Chris??” and I wouldn’t blame them one bit.

It was very entertaining television to watch Rick. But when he made final 4, I knew he wasn’t going to win. I couldn’t possibly have forseen Chris giving up his immunity at final 4 to defeat Rick at fire - I thought Gavin would beat him - but I have to admit, being the first survivor to give up final immunity and then winning fire... that’s one helluva move, and I’d argue, one that made him the best of the final 3.

Gavin played a solid game. It was pointed out that he almost always voted correctly, and never received even one vote against him in 39 days. Julie, sorry hun, but you were an emotional wreck and an absolute goat. You made 0 interesting moves and you’re a very annoying person to watch. That’s why you got 0 votes at final. And FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, “Etsy Shop Owner” is not a fucking job. You are a mother who makes shitty crafts. (In case it’s not obvious, I have no respect for her game whatsoever.)

I’m glad Gavin did get some votes; if it’d been a runaway for Chris I’d be pretty pissed. I’m already kinda salty that he did win, because of the simple fact that he ONLY PLAYED THE GAME FOR 11 DAYS. I’d actually have been more satisfied if Reem had won the challenge and then won the game, because at least she has a vibrant personality and stayed on the Edge for an astounding 33 days.

But I think my biggest problem is this: last season, David vs. Goliath, a David won. Just like the myth. Perfect for encapsulating the theme of the season. Then, encapsulating the theme of THIS season, an EoE returnee won. If a Goliath had won last season it would’ve been unsatisfying. 

But this season, if a non-returnee had won, it wouldn’t have negatively effected the twist of the season. In my opinion.

The one thing that completely ruined this season for me was giving Chris an idol at final 6. And if I’m being honest, Rick probably ruined his own game by giving Chris back his half of the immunity idol. Yeah, they had a relationship, but this is a game, and Rick should’ve seen that giving Chris immunity at final 5 was a mistake. Look at all the winners past: a lot of them did a good amount of backstabbing. And I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that, if Rick was sitting at final tribal, he would’ve won with 13 votes.

I’m not saying he was robbed - he sealed his own fate - but because there were 16 people left in the finale... it screwed things up. 

Anyway, I’ve rambled enough. Even though I thoroughly hate the theme of season 39, let’s hope it’s better than the carnage we witnessed this season.

Stay Greater.

[onlydarylnormanfic]

Next On Deck...

Stay

Request: Could you do a daryl x reader the morning after their first time together and he wakes but she's not there and he thinks it was too good to be true blah blah blah but really she's down stairs making breakfast and he sees her and she's all i made breakfast hope that okay but he’s all serious face so then she's like im sorry i shouldn't have i thought it'd be nice and i don't know kitchen sex maybe i know it’s kinda unclear but i really love your blog i know if anyone can write this proper its you.

(This one is salty and sweet... lots of rough sex, along with a side of sweet Daryl x Reader. This one should be done soon!)

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Request: I am in love with your stories. If you are still accepting requests, I have one for Daryl. Set in Alexandria, the reader is a new addition to the community and Daryl can’t stop thinking about her the moment he sees her. He tries to win her over with subtle hints but she’s really dense. He breaks down and decides to swallow his fear and be super blunt about it. Thank you so much. I can’t wait to see what you do with it.

(This one I see lots of fidgety Daryl, trying to be more romantic and attentive than ever before. Only for the reader not to understand what his intentions are. Until one night he just can’t take it anymore and makes his move.)

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Request: Can you do one where the trader has an anxiety or panic attack and Daryl us the only person who can help her. Maybe end in smut. Idk 🤗

(I am thinking with this one the reader has never been outside the walls. But, forces herself to go on a run and her anxiety hits. Or maybe some walkers enter the town for the first time and she is confronted with them. Either way this zombie world will be one she is usually cut off from. Unlike, Daryl who will calm her down and tell her he will protect her.)

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Request #1:  Could you write one where both Daryl and the reader like each other but are both oblivious to the others feelings. Carol and Rick notice this and plot to get the two of them together. I would love it so much.

Request #2:  I know you’ve gotten a lot of requests lately but if they are still open would you write one about Alexandria having a betting pool about when Daryl and the reader will finally end up together and pushing them subtly is allowed. I think it could open it up for a lot of mischief.

(I’m going to combine these two requests. I think this one will be fun. Maybe Carol and Rick team up to win the bet and finally get the two to admit their feelings for each other.)

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LOTS of Shy/Fidgety Daryl Smut coming! But, you know of course when Daryl feels confident the reader wants him... Amazing smut ensues. Alexandria Era.

I also really want to focus on the Macmanus requests as well. Might need to re-watch them this weekend, to get me in the mood for some Macmanus Smut Writing!

Stay Tuned! :)

[autisticsheith]

“slav has been greatly and painfully misunderstood by this fandom” - a manifesto, by me

Okay, this started in a fandom saltiness discussion on — in which I literally said, “I AM ALWAYS UP TO BE SALTY ABOUT SLAV.… More specifically, about how fandom treats Slav” — so that’s where it’s coming from, and I have done very little to clean it up after copy-pasting.

TL;DR: The VLD fandom tends to treat Slav as either hilarious or completely above reproach (sometimes both), which annoys me — because he actually is a fascinating character (at least, he is to me), and I dislike the way he is boiled down to either a joke about, “LMAO SPACE OCD!!!” or turned into a “~pure precious cinnamon roll uwu~” who only resembles his canon counterpart kinda vaguely, if you tilt your head a bit to the left and squint

As a character, I think Slav can be fascinating because, if you actually examine his actions? He is a fucking dick

He’s a reclusive genius who has the intelligence and skill and talent to get away with being a fucking asshole, and yes, he clearly has SOME kind of issue (whether it’s ““space OCD,”” literally seeing all of the possibilities in alternate realities, or some cracked out combination of both)…… But he also isn’t an ~uwu precious cinnamon roll~ and his legitimate issues are not an excuse for the ways that he treats other people (which are largely abysmal)

Like, let’s get this out of the way: Slav is not completely ignorant of how the fuck social cues and nuances work, the way that I’ve seen some people try to say of him in fandom. He picks up on them pretty well, actually, and he figures out exactly why Lance mistook Laika for Slav when Lance had spent however long with her, only hearing her go, “YUP!!” and didn’t put two and two together

So, it stands to reason that Slav KNOWS what he is doing and KNOWS how to act in ways that DON’T make everyone get pissed off at him — but he CHOOSES NOT TO ACT LIKE THAT. Instead, he CHOOSES to act like a big bag of dicks and make everyone else do things his way, even when his way is obstructive as Hell and slows everything down

And let’s be real: Shiro had to all but bodily drag him out of Beta Traz, even going, “Hey man, we’re working with the Blade of Marmora to take down Zarkon, we need you” didn’t get him up and at’em at first, and Slav fought Shiro about everything, every step of the way.

Consider this: Slav fought to stay somewhere that he was constantly tortured and pumped for information that would be used against and used to oppress the people of the entire known universe because he was so completely certain (despite acknowledging, when it’s convenient for him, that there are infinite possibilities and things could always go in so many different ways) that fighting Zarkon was a lost cause and didn’t want to be bothered. He is so certain that he is going to die that he doesn’t even want to TRY (“Oh noooo, even worse. In 98-and-three-one-hundredths of a percent of realities with a prison break, I DIE.”)

When Shiro shows up to break him out, he tries appealing to Slav as a potential rescuer (”I’m here to rescue you, I’m a paladin of Voltron”).

That fails, so he tries appealing to Slav out of some belief that Slav might care about the life and freedom of the peoples of the known universe (“What? We’re finally going to stop Zarkon. We have the Olkari and the Blade of Marmora on our side. But without you, we can’t do it.”)

Slav only finally relents because the Blue Lion can emit a frequency that falls within his lucky range of terahertz — and even then, he fights Shiro every step of the way, about absolutely everything

While Shiro is, y’know, putting himself on the line and risking death to save this asshole who he just met and doesn’t even know for sure can help (—which, yeah. Ulaz is trustworthy and Shiro cares about him, and Kolivan clearly backs up his recommendation if saving Slav is so necessary to the plan. But Shiro is still going on hearsay rather than direct evidence, and he doesn’t really have a choice on that, but still. He is risking his life for an asshole who might not even be all he’s cracked up to be, because Shiro believes that Slav is necessary to take down Zarkon)

And then Slav gets going with the, “YOUR ROBOT ARM IS FANTASTIC DON’T YOU WANT TWO OF THEM” shit

Just. Oh my god. I get it, he doesn’t know how Shiro came to have that arm, but COME ON. It’s understandable that Shiro might not appreciate that shit, and Slav is so flippant about it because thinking about other people’s perspectives or experiences is not a thing that he cares about doing

AND THIS! IS!! AN INTERESTING!!! CHARACTER!!! (to me)

Slav is interesting because he’s an asshole. He’s someone you would only put up with if you needed him, because he uses his intelligence to make himself totally necessary and uses his legitimate problems to generate enough fucking sympathy that people feel bad about trying to argue with him

It isn’t even entirely the fandom’s fault when we mischaracterize him, because Show treats all of this as funny — and okay, yes, I laughed at some of it as much as anyone else did because Josh and Iqbal Theba sold it with their voice acting — but if you take a closer look at what Slav does and how it affects the people around him, literally none of this is fucking funny

And he clearly has the potential to NOT BE THIS GUY, because Mirror!Slav is a badass. Yeah, he still talks out his ass about alternate realities — and apparently he does it enough for Sven to be Exasperated by it, but Mirror!Slav puts himself on the line to save other people (both when he tries to help the Paladins and in general, as a member of the Guns of Gamara)

Mirror!Slav LISTENS to people — like, yeah, he’s all, “None of you have ever rescued me from any goddamn place” but in that particular scene, he isn’t exactly acting in a way I’d call unreasonable. He and Sven just wandered into five armed, unknown combatants who started babbling about Sven being some dude called Shiro AND one of them is Altean, when the Mirror!Alteans are an evil empire (and she’s the spitting image of their evil empress from 10,000 years ago)

But then, when push shoves, he listens to what they’re saying and makes the same, “OH GOSH YOU’RE FROM AN ALTERNATE REALITY” conclusion as Pidge, and HE CHOOSES TO TRUST THEM. Sven is the one going, “dude are you sure about this, it’s dangerous” while Mirror!Slav is all, “If they’re really my friends from an alternate reality, they are probably cool people and we can probably trust them, now let’s go fuck shit up for the cause of galactic freedom”

Mirror!Slav tells the paladins to get the Hell out of dodge while he patches Sven up when Slav Prime is That Asshole who, after the big fight with Zarkon when they have no idea if Shiro and Allura are going to be okay, is all, “IT’S COOL GUYS, I’M OKAY” (“Oh great, Slav made it” — Lance, being 5,000% Done and rightfully so).

Slav Prime is also the one who refuses to let Shiro step on a crack because of some infinitesimally small chance that it MIGHT break his mother’s back IN SOME FUCKING REALITY — NOT EVEN THE PRIME REALITY SPECIFICALLY, BUT IN SOME REALITY. And the one who refuses to go on one of Shiro’s alternate escape routes because you can hear the water running — it isn’t even running into the escape hatch, there is no direct risk of drowning, but OH MAN you can HEAR the water running!!! and Slav is afraid of drowning

Thing is? I get it. Triggers suck. I have triggers of my own. I have dealt with panic attacks, OCD, intrusive thoughts, and so many other things that the fandom likes to attribute to Slav (whether there’s a good case for that in canon or not) — but when it comes to triggers? Sometimes, they are unavoidable and you have to deal with them, and yes, it fucking sucks, but you CAN do it.

An example of a moment when enduring the triggering material and dealing with it would be helpful? When the fate of the entire known universe is on the line and you are obstructing the fight for freedom and peace by being a difficult, egocentric asshole who expects everyone else to cater to you

This is basically where my characterization of Slav in the latest chapter of my fic came from. In my AU, he’s…… well. A difficult, egocentric asshole who gets annoyed when people don’t give him what he wants because Fuck You He Is A Genius, Y’all Just Can’t Keep Up, and he wants Shiro to be his friend because he actually acknowledges that Shiro is kind of a genius in his own right, but Slav just…… Doesn’t Understand

(Read: CHOOSES NOT TO UNDERSTAND)

[this is where @dratiniquest chimed in to say that my take on Slav is kind of like the fusion of Rick Sanchez and Sheldon Cooper]

He doesn’t/chooses not to understand why Shiro doesn’t agree with a life philosophy that basically boils down to, “I am a genius, therefore I should get what the fuck I want, when I want it, and everyone should just agree with me unless I acknowledge their genius, everyone else is too small-minded to keep up”

He also doesn’t get why Shiro…… has no desire for “greatness,” like?? You are a genius, Takashi. It is so rare that Slav acknowledges this for other people, so you are pretty amazing. Why don’t you want to do great things

Shiro: “……Because I already tried doing that out of loyalty to the grandfather I was named after, and it made me miserable and eventually suicidal (whether actively or not), helped me develop an eating disorder, kept me in an abusive relationship that almost killed me more than once, and landed me in rehab for alcohol and opiates at twenty-three. Greatness is overrated”

Shiro: “I just want to make my music, stay sober, keep not hurting myself, maintain the relationships I care about, and someday, wake up next to the guy I love and be able to genuinely mean it when I tell him, ‘If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is’”

Slav: “……………freaking weirdo”

Also belatedly: yes, Slav kind of is a fusion of Sheldon and Rick, like. He’s a Fluorite level fusion. Sheldon, Rick, Slav Prime from canon, a little bit of Mirror!Slav, and my conspiracy theorist father.

[and then the conversation kinda turned to yelling about how Sven is fine because he got to the space hospital and anyway, the point is that Slav is really interesting in canon, but oh my god, the majority of fanon!Slav is nothing like how Slav acts in canon]

[weapon13whitefang]

2., 18., and 22. please!

Salty Ask List

(Well thank you, hun!)

2. Are there any popular fandom OTPs you only BroTP?

I’m a multishipper so I can pretty much ship anything as romantic or platonic or whatever, as long as there’s good fanfiction for it... But I guess if I must give an example of what ship I have that I feel more BroTP eels for, it’s probably Starmora... I know, I know. WTF am I thinking, right? Well, I think it has to do with the fact that I’m friends with comic buff @tranimation and because of her, i’ve dived down into the comic world of GotG and find I prefer Star-Kitty (Peter “Star-Lord” Quill/Katherine “Kitty” Pryde) over that pairing. MCU wise I kind of don’t want Peter to be in a relationship, funny enough. Not until he’s allowed himself to grow and mature more, anyway. And not necessarily does it have to be with Gamora, because I am rather fond of the idea of her being a simple tough female who DOES NOT need a relationship. We kinda have that now but we know James Gunn may shift that

Another is actually Kragdu. Kraglin always always always comes off as another son figure to Yondu. But he also comes off as his best friend. A first mate is an important role and Kraglin has to be close to Yondu for that role. But also just Kraglin’s line to Yondu about him taking Peter’s side like he doesn’t care about the other Ravagers kind of sounded lik “You like him more than me” which is such a sibling thing. And after the burning of Yondu’s body, I really got that feeling of brotherhood between Peter and Kraglin, so it enforced that feeling of Kraglin is like a son / really close brotherly friend to Yondu and Peter.

18. Does not shipping something ‘popular’ mean you’re in denial and/or biased?

Oh my gosh, of course not! If there’s one thing I myself can not stand / tolerate, it is people who take shipping to such extremes that they use it as a gaudy weapon against others. It’s kinda like how every fandom has to have a “gay” pairing now. Of course the gay comunity needs more representation. Of course that’s important. Just as it’s important for the POC group to get their rights in media and their representation. It’s all very important and I completly support that we see more of this... But I am not okay when people force ships down throats. Whether its a heterosexual or gay ship, you do not have the right to take it and taint it by using it as a weapon to throat stab people or shame them. That is not what shipping is supposed to be about. Least not the way I grew up to see shipping! and it breaks my heart that I can’t go into any tag of my favorite pairings and not see a war going on between everyone, 

An example of this for me is The Walking Dead world and the character that is Daryl Dixon... Everyone seems to have a word about who Daryl does or doesn’t put his dick in. It’s always a fight of what his sexuality is that it even has caused poor Norman Reedus to get swamp attacked with people hating on him for not picking a side or shoving his real life co-workers to him. Whether it’s for Carol or Beth or Jesus or Rick or even Negan, it comes back to Melissa or Emily or Tom or Andrew or JDM. 

A character should not be redeemed to what sexual organs they possess. And if I don’t fully agree with a pairing or I don’t side with Group A or Group B, I am not a biased asshole or in denial. I am allowed to ship how I wish and feel how I wish about a pairing. I will not be bullied into your corner and you should n’t bully others over it. 

So no. You are not in denial or biased. If you want to ship something, then ship it. And also DO NOT throw around terms that you think are right to throw around when really it’s just weakening the word - pedophile, pervert, rapist, etc.. These are not words to throw about at people. Some of these are serious problems and getting pissy or violent overs someone thinking a different way than you over a pairing - A FICTIONAL PAIR OF PEOPLE THAT ARE NOT REAL - is downright mental on many levels and just takes a word and makes people take it less seriously.

Do not let the real world take a fictional pairing and taint it with the real world problems. Yes, representation matters. Yes, your feelings on the pairing are valid. But please do not forget that other people have feelings to validate as well. They may be negative feelings, but that doesn’t make them any less important or right. And if someone is giving you hell for liking something considered “wrong”, then accept that not everyone things lie you, take what they said, use it as a reminder that there are ugly people out there, and turn and be stronger for moving on and doing what you love.

I have a lot more to say but I’ll chill out for now.

22. Popular character you hate?

Hmmm... I don’t really hate any characters... I dislike some of them, but I also can understand that a character can be fascinating if you really study them.

I guess if I had to pick, I was never a super fan of Sasuke Uchiha from Naruto. I never got the whole “he’s so hot” and “he’s so misunderstood” trope around him.I always just felt he was just being manipulated by others and his own coping mechanism for his grief. He had a fault. He was a broken, stubborn character...  That’s all he was to be. I get why people like him and of course, I like Sasuke. But I never got the whole Uchica worship thing that was happening. 

I can’t really think of any other character right now... I can say that I’m not always a fan of the over hyped characters because I never can understand the whole appeal... Not always but sometimes I am in that boat of “I don’t get it” for a character.

[lurkerdelima]

1,6,14 for salty asks

1. Strictly speaking of Black Sails, I kinda don’t get any of the OTPs that involve Billy Bones. He’s got nice arms and I do like tall men, obvs, but he gives off a thoroughly asexual vibe to me. No disrespect to anyone who ships him with anyone else! I just don’t get it myself.

6. Venturing outside of Black Sails for a sec, I didn’t hate it exactly but I didn’t understand Rick/Daryl (Rickyl!) from The Walking Dead until I read some particularly hot, well-written fic for that pairing. Now I kinda love it even though I haven’t watched the show in a while. I’m trash, I know.

14. Unpopular opinion about my fandom, OH GEEZ. Let’s just say I have a lot of feelings about Thomas and his characterization the way he’s been written in some fics. Also as someone who is frequently separated from her husband for long-ish periods of time due to his job, I can tell you it isn’t always sunshine and roses picking up where you left off. I just think James and Thomas would need Time, more so than a lot of the fandom is willing to give them. Yes they love each other, obviously, but they’ve been apart for ten years! Think of how much we saw a character like Silver or Max change just over the course of the show, which I think is only supposed to be 1-2 years. Furthermore, Thomas has been imprisoned and James has been a murderous pirate captain for those ten years. That would do a number on anybody’s relationship.

Anyway. Lots of feelings.

[winstonhcomedy]

How’d Winston Do This Weekend? 10/12-10/14

WHATTTTT A SWEET DELICIOUS DADDY OF A WEEKEND! I had a show each night. Two booked and one open mic. I love weekends where I am working. This coming weekend I’m off because of a wedding, but then after that it is back to work!!!

Let’s start with Friday night. I figured I was in town so I might as well head down to Slyderz in Richmond. This room on Friday night’s is run by Lynn Painter, who used to run a show at Cary 100 on Wednesdays. It’s an urban room with dope staff, and killer wings and sliders. I got there at around 7:15 and only other person there was the bartender. 

I ended up ordering the dry rub wings and they were absolutely delicious! I am a wing boy. I love chicken wings. This was like the 5th time in 7 days where my dinner was chicken wings. I am going to die young, but I will have a huge smile in the casket with sweet buffalo sauce and lemon pepper running through my veins.

Lynn showed up around 7:50 and started to set up. We caught up a bit, and shot the shit until a couple other comics showed up. Chris St. John and Moe Singleton. Both newer comics who are out here grinding at shows. Chris had a ukulele with him and was also carrying a copy of the book Psycho Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz. It’s basically a self help book written by a plastic surgeon. I know nothing about it other than it sounds like it would be some of the most superficial wack ass shit of all time, but Chris swears by it. 

Turns out he set some of the groundwork for a lot of modern self-help books and workshops. It’s all about getting a positive outcome through visualization. So sounds pretty interesting, but honestly I’ve never been into self-help stuff. It always feels like common sense with fancy wrapping paper and a price tag on it. But if it works for you laydees more power to you. I am definitely a proponent of self-fulfilling prophecy so I don’t have too much room to talk.

At this point it starts to look like nobody is going to show up. It is after 8 (the start time) and we have a limited number of comics and no audience, but then they started to come in. When the show started we ended up with about 11 ppl there, so we were ready to get it on the road.

Lynn went first and was performing with hip-hop music playing super loudly behind him. He did a good job of making sure the audience was done ordering, and eating by the time he brought the first comic up which is always appreciated.

The first comic up was Moe. The best part is Moe had been waiting like 35 minutes for his wings to get there. As soon as his wings arrive and he takes his first bite Lynn yell’s, “give it up for MOE SINGLETON!” 

That is one of the great fears as a comedian. That your sweet, delicious, precious, dripping with sauce wings will arrive as soon as you’re called on stage. 

So Moe is up there doing his material with Asian Zing sauce on his hands an the has an ok set. A lot of stuff doesn’t work but he has some stuff that does. There is one lady in the audience who is throwing shade the entire set. Just side comments and being salty during the set. The highlight of which was Moe closing super strong doing his best joke, and people start clapping. She responds by saying, “y’all really gonna clap for that? Ok then.” Which honestly absolutely destroyed me. 

I am up second and I decide that Im going to have to get control of this crowd. So I start my set by talking to “the mean lady”. Just busting her balls by asking her why she had to be so mean to Moe. That we are all following our dreams and she’s just ruining them, and it was killing. It was a super fun set. I ask her what her name is and she avoids the question multiple times by shoveling fries in her mouth which was absolutely hilarious to me. This goes on for like 5 minutes and I get other people involved and it turned out into being a super fun set.

Honestly those are the best and most fun ways to handle a heckler. It was addressed to the point where she apologized to Moe but nothing was said that was so mean that she’d feel offended and walked out. She was laughing and having a super fun time as well. 

After getting control of the room I did about 2 new jokes and they both worked really well. They were both race jokes, and I like gauging an all black crowd to make sure that what I'm saying makes sense and isn’t ridiculous and offensive. 

I’d give this set about an A-. I felt really good about it, and it was definitely the best set of work week. It put me in a good mood for the two booked shows I had the rest of the weekend.  Definitely a dope start to the weekend.

Saturday I had a super chill and relaxing day which was nice. I almost completely forgot I was booked at The Push comedy theatre in Norfolk VA. I was supposed to be on the showcase, but regular host/comic Hatton Jordan was under the weather and needed someone to host and zaddy needs the money so I agreed. 

They had several dropouts so I had to snag a comic to ride with. I figured I’d pick a newer comic who could use the experience, so I guilted Rick Williams to skip his hockey game to ride with me.

We headed down, and had a super good conversation about comedy, Richmond, goals, aspirations, and just bad show stories. So it made the 2+ hour trip go by super fast.

We get there a little early and decide to look for a bite to eat. We find this hole in the wall taco bar called Sanctuary. It is sketchy looking af. It is down an alley, it has a flickering light overhead and absolutely no way to see inside or out. 

We go in and we are in this super narrow but dope spot. There is two tables and then the rest of the building is a bar that runs all the way back to the kitchen.  There is like pop/punk art on the wall, and they’re playing some rocking tunes over the speakers and running music videos that don’t match the songs on the televisions. It is like we are in a refurbished lane from a shooting range it is so narrow.

The tacos were delicious and the bartender was super nice. This will definitely be my spot to eat whenever I'm invited back to The Push.

We go over and check out part of the show going on before us. It is an improv theatre so they’re doing an improvised Halloween show to a nearly sold out crowd. The audience is loving it even if Improv isn’t my cup of tea. We watch for about thirty minutes and decide to head to the lobby to get ready for the show.Once in the lobby the other comics start to arrive including Kyle Phalen and Nick Deez (rva transplant). 

The first show ends and they make na announcement that if you were there for the first show you get into the stand up show for free. This is dope and we get a pretty good retention with about 20 people staying for the stand up show. This coupled with the people that bought tickets led us to having about 35+ ppl at the show which was sick.

They had us set up with a music mic stand stand, I said bump that and went to the car to get a traditional one. I just never really like anything but a round base mic stand. I might be crazy but it just is comfortable.

The show starts and I do about 15 or 16. I had a pretty good hosting set. I get so in my head and don’t do what I should do which is crowd work. I do about 1 minute of it and then go into my material. Half of my stuff hits really hard, the rest does ok, and only one thing doesn’t work at all. All in all for a host set it was pretty dope. I’d say this was a C. 

Honestly compared to what I can do I’d say this was definitely average, but that’s ok. People are now settled down and ready for the show. I did my job as a host, and I can tell people appreciated what I was doing. The big pops really popped.

Next up is Rick Williams, and he DID NOT DO SO HOT. Oooooweeeee laydees. He definitely was having one of those sets where you can tell the person on stage is hating it. It was a good learning experience for him. He’s in that stage of being a new comic where a lot of what he writes is sexual, violent, edgy, etc. 

It was cool to see him work through that, end up getting a few laughs and realize once he got off stage that he has other things he needs to work on. Always impressive to see a new comic really understand that not everything is going to work everywhere and it is good to be versatile. 

Later Nick Deez went up and had the set of the night. The people really dug and vibed with what he was doing on stage. He’s about a year in, and def making some strides. These are some of my fav people to bust balls with, so we were having a blast after the show.

I was singing a cover of Harvey Danger’s Flagpole Sitta where I changed all of the lyrics to being about Rick bombing. I had so much fun I’m definitely recording a cover of it on Garageband and when he leasts expects it I will release it haha.

All in all a super dope night with good friends. The ride back was fun as well. We got deeper into comedy, and our fears about doing it. Talked about my hopeful future move, and why I’m so scared of it. 

We really got into some kinda deep territory, but it was definitely good to do. I am super self conscious about my self and especially my comedy. I pride myself on being the hardest working comic in the area. All I can control is how many shows I do, how much I write, and how critical I am of myself. I legitimately will do and have done shows anywhere. I’ve done clubs, colleges, coffee shops, urban rooms, improv theatres, dive bars, redneck bars, nightclubs, alt rooms, theatres, I've opened for bands, singers, poets, drag shows, and this week I’ll be performing on my first burlesque show. Unfortunately I always have this fear that I can’t cut it in certain rooms, but each show is a reminder that that is bullshit and I’ll put my stuff up against whoever.

We ended our night getting McDonalds drive thru at 2 am, and that is the perfect way to end a night of comedy. I went to sleep happy knowing I had brunch and one last show the next day.

Sunday I go to brunch with Brock Hall and Rick Williams at Metro Diner in Willow Lawn. It was a nice relaxing brunch which I followed up with watching the last Harry Potter movie. 

Then it was time to get ready to head down to Newport News to be on Sunday Funnies at Cozzy’s Comedy Club which is Virginia’s longest continuously running comedy club. I always enjoy this show, because it is run and booked by my good friend Holly Owens. 

This week Mu Cuzzo was hosting and the lineup was filled with some of my favorite people to hang and chill with. Closing it out was Sid Bridge who runs the open mic at Cozzys and is an all around swell jew. We also had Jounte Ferguson, Torrey Huggins, and Ryan Valentine on the mic. Allison Moore was also on the show and finally there was Mike Jay. I’ve never met or seen Mike Jay before but he seemed like a good guy.

This is one of those shows that you have to make fun. There were 13 people there and 5 of them weren’t on the show and weren’t employees. But honestly Mu brought some good energy in what I assume was his first time hosting. We all just got into it and it became one giant super fun workshop.

Jounte did a new joke about how he might have slept with a r******d girl. I work at a school for autism so I don’t use that word on stage, it doesn’t work for me personally, but I will never police a comic’s language on stage. 

When I went up I just made myself have fun. I did nothing but crowdowrk for the first 8 minutes and it was all me asking questions to Jounte about how it was a “maybe.” Like how didn’t he know, and asking him a bunch of questions. he was getting so uncomfortable it was hilarious. Everybody was dying laughing and we were all having such a good time. I then closed with 4 minutes of new jokes and they didn’t go so hot. With an intimate crowd they really wanted the crowd work which was ok. I had a super hot and fun set and I'd honestly say for the room and how everyone else’s set went I’d give myself an A-.

The rest of the show was fun. Allison had a fun set as well, and Mike Jay did fine. He had some questions after the show about Clash of the Comics at the Richmond FunnyBone so we chatted about that for a bit before I left. 

Sid closed it out and I forgot he has a few jokes I really really dig. He has one about replacing any word in a sentence with the word “jew” and it becomes offensive and it’s a great joke. I’d never seen him play bass on stage but I guess that’s what he closes with. 

This was a fun show and my entire ride home I just kept thinking to myself how good it felt to do super well in front of nobody.

All of my success is tied directly to how much fun I am having on stage and I always forget that. Even in tough or weird rooms with or without audiences I need to remember I love comedy and that this shit is supposed to be fun.

So that was my weekend and it was super fun and delicious so until next time LAYDEES!!! I LOVE YOU ALL XOXO

[chronicles-of-a-paper-heart]

Cait over at Paperfury created this tag and I immediately loved the idea. You connect books to colours, or rather to the emotions they’re commonly associated with.

She also allowed everyone to steal the tag and a wise kangaroo once said: The people want to break rules and be rebellious, they just want someone to tell them it’s okay.

So, here I am ‘stealing’ that tag for my very first #tagtuesday.

  BLUE – Book that made you sad

I went over to my bookshelves to see if I had any book on there that could get me to cry, I assure you that’s quite an achievement. I don’t usually cry while reading. But there was a book that recently managed just that.

Gregor and the Code of Claw. That book ripped my heart out. My best friend visited me a few months ago and we read books aloud to each other. She always pestered me to read that series but I only read the first two books before she came, so we read the last three ones together. Before we started the last one she told me that I probably had to read most of that book because she cried multiple times every time she read it. And oh boy do I now know why! So SAD!

RED – Bookworm problems that make you angry

Oh, where to start. First, I could copy every word on Cait’s list for this prompt. couldn’t agree more. Stickers on Covers (and what’s even worse, fake stickers that are actually printed on the cover. Still worse when they are A PRICETAG!! ON! THE! FREAKIN! COVER! (I’m still salty af about that)

Cover Changes mid-series! I don’t think I have to say a lot about this one. Everyone knows about the anguish, everyone suffers! In that same vein … when books from the same publisher, same, edition/cover etc. don’t have the same height. Like what do those 2mm give you?? Other than my wrath! It doesn’t look good on my shelves. And why do it?? It doesn’t even make any sense?

And when people try to police what others can read or enjoy. Like ehm, no?? You do you, and I can enjoy whatever the heck I find enjoyable? Why try to convince to have less thing to be happy about? You enjoy fluffy romance? Gritty crime? Ya? New Adult? Who cares?! (Sorry rant over. Just had this conversation recently and I just don’t get it)

  YELLOW – Upcoming book(s) you’d be happy to have right now

Well I tried to stay away from all those ‘Most anticipated releases’-post because I want to reduce my TBR and that doesn’t work if I constantly buy new books (of course I found ways to still get a lot of new books, sneaky Slytherin brain trying to trick me and my book buying ban!) But I still have a few for this prompt:

Vengeful by V.E. Schwab. I actually preordered this and I CANNOT WAIT! I need it now! The Cover is gorgeous, Vicious is one of my all-time favourite books and the little snippets we got, have me hyperventilating!

A Thousand Perfect Notes by C.G. Drews aka Paperfury. I wanted this the minute Cait announced it. It sounds so intriguing, heartwarming and -breaking and like everything I never knew I needed. And well, it’s from Cait! (Also, coverlove!)

Das Schloss der träumenden Bücher by Walter Moers (The Castle of Dreaming Books). He is one of my favourite authors and this is the third (actually the second part of the second book) book in The Dreaming Books Series and I loved that series, that world. But it gets pushed back and back and I NEED IT! The expected publication date is 8th October 2025. 2025!! That’s pure torture!

King of Scars by Leigh Bardugo. I mean, a book about Nikolai??? YES PLEASE! NOW! PLEASE! Enough said.

Oh and the last one I kinda need now, but I also don’t want it because I don’t want the series to end? Kingdom of Ash by Sarah J Maas. I am relatively calm right now, but I know that will change as soon as I start my reread. I love Aelin and those books helped me through a hard time so they’ll be forever in my heart.

  GREEN – Favourite unlikely friends

The first group of friends is probably not that well known, (I only know two other people who have read these books) and that is the group of friends in the Emperor’s Edge Series by Lindsay Buroker. They are all so completely different, one all stoic and serious, another one book-y and sad, another one extremely driven and chatty etc. And their little group grows with each book and still fit so well.

Also Harry and Luna, I love their weird friendship. It’s a quiet sort of friendship, but they still really help each other. I think they both needed each other.

Aaaand also The Raven Boys and Blue. Ronan and Gansey, so different and still so loyal. All of them.

  GREY – Books you are totally emotionless about

This one was actually quite hard. But I got a few.

First, I agree with Cait on Classics. Don’t really care either way for most of them. Same with YA Contemporary with the main focus on romance.

But as for specific books:

Fathomless by Jackson Pearce It was an okay plot, okay characters. Already forgot most of it. but I think I liked it while reading? But yeah, three stars. Don’t care for it much.

Twilight. I was obsessed when I first read them. I kid you now I walked around between ensemble (guitar) practices with the book in front of my nose and my friend guiding me so I wouldn’t run into walls or anything. but nowadays, I don’t really have any strong emotions about it. I don’t hate them, I don’t love them. I just don’t think about them most of the time.

Four by Veronica Roth is a short story collection that I probably should have read shortly after finishing the Divergent Series (which I really enjoyed) to actually care about it. But since I read that book a few years later … Couldn’t bring me to care. Meh.

Also, Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater. That book was the definition of meh. And I don’t know what happened. I love Maggie, okay? What went wrong?? It was just so bland (still great writing style though)

  PINK – Book ending (no spoilers though) that you love

Even the Darkest Stars by Heather Fawcett. I really liked that book. The setting is FANTASTIC and I really liked the characters and story too, but the ending was amazing! Made the book so much better! (Changed a few peoples opinion for the better if you read reviews)

Three Dark Crowns by Kendare Blake. I loved that book. Mainly because I loved Katharine and was already expecting the slower pace (which I think threw a lot of people of since it was marketed very differently). And that ending! I had to start One Dark Throne immediately!

The Raven King! That was a great ending. And one I certainly didn’t see coming.

  PURPLE – Book you never really understood

The Woman Behind the Waterfall. It’s not that I didn’t understand that book overall. But there were parts in it that just went over my head. I really like that book, and still think about it, but yeah. Didn’t get certain more magical realism type of scenes.

And I don’t get the hype about the Mortal Instruments Series. Honestly, I hated Clary! So! Much! And I don’t think I can suffer through three more books with her. I will give Cassandra Clare another chance with The Infernal Devices Books but … yeah. We’ll see how that one goes.

Oh, and Rick Riordan. Unpopular opinion time: I really don’t like his Percy Jackson Series and I don’t really get why so many people are obsessed with them? They’re predictable and just … I don’t get it.

  WHITE – Author you’re scared of (they are so mean to their characters)

I haven’t even read anything by him yet, but I’m still scared? Jay Kristoff.

Also, V.E. Schwab! Honestly! So mean! So great!

And Sarah J Maas. At least a little. I don’t think she’ll really kill anyone important off but I’m still a bit nervous.

Oh and maybe GRRM because I only have three characters I absolutely don’t want to die! (Spoiler? Kinda? If you wanna see it just mark it Dany, Tyrion and Ser Jorah (And maybe Sansa). The rest can die for all I care. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (Especially Jon Snow!)

  BLACK – Book you think is powerful and influential

The first book that came to mind is George by Alex Gino. It’s own voices and middle grade and such a lovely hopeful and important story. Especially for middle grade. If you haven’t read it yet, please do.

And I think Harry Potter was pretty influential. Don’t think I have to say anything about that one.

And maybe The Hunger Games? It’s so much more than the love triangle. It has so many political and moral statements/questions. And it kinda started the whole dystopian craze.

  ORANGE – Playful characters who are just too adorable

Now, that one was HARD. Apparently, I don’t read enough books with people that aren’t assassins or broken beyond repair (or both). But I still got three. Although I’m pretty sure a lot of you won’t know them.

Boots, Gregor’s two-year-old sister. She is just the most adorable thing in the world. I love her and I honestly would have read the Gregor books just for her. She is cute, and funny, and open-minded and just exactly like you would imagine a two-year-old to be like.

The Booklings. Just all of them. I general. They are so CUTE! and I want to cuddle them and put them in protective blankets and let know one near them to harm them. Pure cinnamon roles.

And maybe the Cheshire Cat (not from Alice in Wonderland, but from Madness by Maja Köllinger). It’s definitely more playful than adorable. But … oh well.

  And that was my list. this was so much fun and I’ll definitely do more tags in the future. What would your answers be? Are there any fantasy books with adorable, playful characters that you could recommend? I’m clearly missing something there! What was a book you didn’t understand or the love for an author you don’t get?

  Emotions in Colours Book Tag Cait over at Paperfury created this tag and I immediately loved the idea. You connect books to colours, or rather to the emotions they're commonly associated with.

[mardi-aesthetics]

Ok, here it is. My problem with Love, Simon. First of all, my ex really loved it. Sike! No, that's not a reason why I dislike the movie, I'm not that salty hunty. No. I dislike this movie for a multitude of reasons, all of which come down to a few certain key points, which I'm about to share. I should say at the beginning however that I don't totally dislike this film; it was... okay. Just not the best, for me at least. I should also say that my opinions as a gay man do not reflect the opinions of any other gay men, my voice is mine alone, and WE AREN'T ALL THE SAME BRUH! Just kidding! Well, about the shouting. Not having the same opinions is real talk. It has been my experience as an avid book-reader that movies made from books can be awful (we're looking at you, The Lightnign Thief). But sometimes, they can be divine (Harry Potter series, Divergent series). This however... Is so very appropriately underwhelming.

Number 1}: Why now?! This movie has been praised for several reasons, foremost among them is it's breathtakingly lovely stroytelling (I think Titanic had a better story, though a more depressing one). People all across the globe adore this movie for its seeming originality, and I'm not entirely convinced. There have been a load (get it?) of other, much greater sotries involving LGBT characaters; the books written by Rick Riordan is one luscious example. Queer As Folk and The Perks of Being A Wallflower is another. I should point out that though the film for Perks was made in 2013, it took place in the early 90's. Queer As Folk was filmed in the late 90's, on to the mid 2000's. Love, Simon is a little late in the game, considering those other tales not only represent the life of gay men much more realistically, but they beat Love, Simon to the punch. It is the 2000-teens, truthfully this kind of movie could have been made years ago and made a much bigger splash. And not only that, but this being 2018, we don't need these stories anymore: representation in the media of LGBT life is getting better and better.

Number 2}: Reality checks One thing I know as a book-geek is that some things are just a little too much. Tana Mongeau for instance. A toothbrush! Some things are simply too dumb and highly unlikely to be swallowed. This movie is one such. A gay guy... whom nobody knows is gay... uses emails to talk to another gay guy... all the while being blackmailed... and then outed... and lying to EVERYONE... this is getting worse and worse.... you see where I'm going here. No! I don't buy it. I understand poetic license. I understand that certain liberties can be taken when writing books and other forms of media. But this is a lot to deal with. The plot is trite! It is neither beleivable nor likable. This kid isn't an antihero or some other thing, he's a pathological liar, and nobody calls him on it.

Number 3}: Reality check, part deux I am a gay man. I know gay culture. I have gay friends, I've had gay sex, I've (almost) gotten gay married. But nobody, and I do mean nobody, has a story like this. Case in point: I was talking with an ex-boyfriend after having just seen the movie, and on the drive back we were discussing it. My ex adored the movie, thinking it was so like his own life, so relatable. Yet, when I asked, he couldn't point out a single point in the movie where his life converged.

Number 4}: Gay? No In addition to all that... mess... This movie portrays gay men and teens unrealistically. I recently reread the reimagining of Twlight, called Life and Death, by Stephanie Meyer, and she recalled that her main character got a lot of flack for being a human female so in love with a male vampire. She was called a damsel-in-distress, a boy-chaser, and the shade is understandable. She kinda was. Love, Simon makes gay men look the same. Like we have nothing better to do than pine after a guy we've never met. My question the entire time watching this movie in the theater was "Can't this kid just stop? Stop thinking being in a relationship will make you happy. Stop lying to everyone. Stop being cowardly". Plenty of people exist happily as single and staying that way; plenty of people are anti-marriage and happy; plenty of people are content to remain virginal and chaste until marriage, or until death, and they're... well I won't say happy... but you get the idea. Being with someone will never complete you, not really. Relationships fall apart, move away, make you cry. They shouldn't be reduced to this. Instead, we deal with the protagonist typing on his laptop, imagining every guy he knows typing back to him. Excpet, ironically, the guys he thinks are straight. There's a reason he might still be in the closet hunty, he might have a girlfriend. Or, much more likely, he might be bisexual. Bisexual people exist too.

Number 5}: Relatability I persoanlly never lived, as many might put, 'in the closet'. I never really understood the whole gay-straight thing until puberty, and even then, I never had panic attacks over someone finding out. I never thought it was something to be ashamed of, to hide. Being different is difficult, but it takes courage to be yourself. And the protagonist doesn't have that. Loads of people worldwide enjoy this movie, but are any of them really gay? Or are they just ooh-ing and ahh-ing at how cutesy this film is? The point in the movie when the dork (I won't even try to remeber his name) outs the main characater, and he just kinda... sits there. For someone that didn't want the world to know he was gay, he sure didn't react much. Internal turmoil? Or just cowardice? Even when teased, calle drude words, he does nothing. Where I would bust heads, he sits there and lets a teacher handle it for him. I understand that violence may not be a good reaction, but letting someone do your own dirty work is just lazy. His cowardice, his lying, and ignorance (or should I say sadism), were his undoing.

Number 6}: Ferris wheel blues The last scene of the movie, wher he asks his apparent mystery crush to ride the Ferris wheel with him, after anouncing his identity and his sexuality, therefore outing his illicit friend, is just plain stupid. Why would you go through all the secrecy, all the lies, just to wind up outing someone else? Coming out is a very personal experience, everyone has a different story. Forcing someone to come out, just to be with you, is wrong. On top of that, just because you're both gay doesn't mean you'll have anything beyond that in common. I've met some gay men whom I just couldn't deal with they wre so rude. Plus, the fact that they hadn't seen each other before that... what would happen, do you think, if the illicit friend from the emails said "I'm only into other black guys". Or, "I don't find you attarctive at all". One in every ten men will identify as gay; roughly the population of New Jersey identifies as LGBT. Wait until college or when you have a job and can support yourself to come out, if you're really that scared of your parent's opinions, or of your life changing. Then bump uglies.

A Last Few Words While this film sucks butt, and not in the good way, it has two points that I'm very happy with: The loving speech given by Jennifer Garner, and the Glee actor, Clark Moore. Lets start with the mother. Her speech about her son holding his breath, was very sweet, and inspiring. Many gay guys still in the closet will watch this movie and see an anthem playing, especially with the heart-warming talk between mother and son. Not every coming-out sotry is violent and heart-rending; some of it is actually rather anticlimactic. It's not always so traumatizing, and I really enjoy the movie including gthis little bit. Next, with Clark Moore, whose character is the other gay guy, the openly gay guy. This is a bit more realistic, the fact that they include this one person, because not all gay men look, behave, dress the same way. Moore's character is out-and-proud, in a very realistic way.

[theworstbob]

yellin’ at songs, week thirty-eight

takin’ some time to think ‘bout the songs what all debuted on billboard between on 27 september 1997, 29 september 2007, and 30 september 2017

spoiler this is extra salty, hoo boy pop music is bad and no one should like it

9.27.1997

2) "4 Seasons of Loneliness," by Boyz II Men

Yep. Yep, this is a '90s R&B slo jamz. Just a bunch of dudes singing gently about how epic and powerful some feeling is -- in this case, loneliness, which, if you were not aware, is the opposite of love. See, what makes loneliness so fascinating is, when you're in love, you're a two, right? But when you're an alone, you're a one. And if you're a one for long enough, you will eventually be alone through all four of the seasons -- winter, spring, summer, and of course, faultumln. What a brilliant job Boyz II Men do of portraying what it would be like to be single for a year.

29) "Everything," by Mary J. Blige

This is like a '90s R&B dude song from the female song. "You are my trusted friend/On you I can depend." First off, way not to end the lyric with a preposition, but also, I think I've heard that "friend/depend" from 1997 R&B dudes at least 20 times. "It never occurred to me the first time I saw your face/I would fall so deep in love, that your love can't be replaced." Face/Replace sounds new? But I wouldn't be surprised if it popped up here and there across '90s R&B. This is a bit bouncier and more upbeat than the R&B dude fare -- it's not overdramatic, it's Mary J. Blige revelling in love, so at least it has that going for it. It just doesn't feel like its own thing.

79) "Don't Go," by Le Click ft./Kayo

How come people who make dance music are so shitty at making hot dance tracks? Like, every EDM song in 2017 sounds like the apocalypse, and every dance song from 1997 is the saddest goddamned thing I've ever heard. "Don't go, my feeling can't be wrong." Now urrbody in the club gettin' desperate. Like what even is this, why are we putting this song in front of that "I'm Too Sexy" beat I can't stop hearing because Tay Tay ruined everything, why, why.

88) "Off the Books," by The Beatnuts ft./Big Punisher & Cuban Link

You know what, I didn't mind them. Everyone rapped well, and I appreciated a look at a life of crime that wasn't about drugs. You can also evade taxes, or launder money! Those are less fun crimes to commit than drugs, but they do the trick if you're out of drugs. I don't know how much of this song actually invovled money laundering, I just know the hook was "ain't nothin' but crooks in here/gettin' mad money off the books in here," and the song wasn't really worth paying attention to, so I'm just sort of hoping it was about the intricacies of money laundering.

90) "Love Is Alive," by 3rd Party

So OK this is just basic Euro stupidity CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE FUCKING AMAZON AD. CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE FUCKING AMAZON AD WHERE THE DOG WISHES IT COULD TALK TO THE HUMAN. What even is the song they use in that ad? How did they find it? Like did they commission a song specifically for that ad? That song had to be written for the ad. They filmed and edited the ad, went to a coffee shop three blocks from the office, and asked people to take two minutes to write a song about a dog that wishes it could talk to humans. It's the worst goddamn song in the world and I have to hear it 20 times a week until the ad campaign is over because of this stupid fucking thing I'm doing. That's not fair. That's not fair! Why would you increase the degree of difficulty? I know it's late in the game, it's not supposed to be easy, but you're supposed to let me win. "I wish I could ask you how was your day." YOU'RE A DOG. YOU WISH FOR MEATS, AND THE DAY YOU DIE WILL BE THE HAPPIEST BECAUSE THAT IS THE DAY YOU GET TO HAVE A CHOCOLATE SOMETHING.

9.29.2007

14) "Good Life," Kanye West ft./T-Pain

This song is ridiculous because Kanye eventually is inspired by T-Pain to use Auto-tune on himself and makes three miserable masterpieces that affect pop/hip-hop for a decade, and this song is like the bounciest most triumphant thing off Graduation. Like you can trace a direct line from this song, with its jubilant T-Pain line and that delightful "more ass than the models" drop, to Lil Uzi Vert, who makes boring songs about how dark his mind is.

61) "1, 2, 3, 4," Feist

For some reason the top YouTube search result for this song is not this song, but rather the Plain White T's song. I hate that this is my algorithm. Also we talked about lineages, and we talked about the Amazon ad, and you can draw a direct line from this song's surprising rise to popularity to that goddamned Amazon ad. We made a folksy indie artist popular, and a decade later, we have a folksy indie-sounding song about a dog staring at a human and saying "UNDERSTAND ME! WHY?????" Like I'm listening to this song, and I'm no longer hearing the Apple ad, I'm hearing Linda from corporate's ringtone, because Linda from corporate downloaded the song from the Amazon ad. "It makes me so happy when the puppy talks to the baby!" Guys I'm not well.

86) "Inconsolable," Backstreet Boys

I feel like I'm on the precipice of an amazing joke or insight but all my brain is doing is staring at the words "Twenty years of not understanding why they keep giving AJ solos." Hey you wanna hear something bonkers? Two of the Backstreet Boys hadn't turned 30 when this song had been released. How the fuck are you gonna be in your late 20s and making adult contemporary jams. How is your life this over before you're at least 32. Also one of the Backstreet Boys was 36 in 2007. Sir, you are a Backstreet Man. I don't know what your problems are, but I can see you have several.

88) "Do It," Nelly Furtado

I mean, it exists. Like it just sort of starts, and then it doesn't stop. I felt like I was listening to this song for 1000 years because it just kept saying "do it like you do it to me." Except like I'd imagine this person is doing it to Nelly Furtado, so I guess I just don't understand why she wouldn't just urge him to keep doin' it? But then the song just faded out, and I'm just here like, did I actually listen to something? Was I supposed to hear a story, is this, is this a rough draft? Did they intend on polishing this before the release? "So you released the album before you finished the last track! Big deal! Everyone makes mistakes, everyone has those days, as we are fond of saying in 2007! But we will be releasing this as a single so the whole world can hear what a bad job you did."

93) "I'm So Hood," DJ Khaled ft./T-Pain, Trick Daddy, Rick Ross & Piles

Oh, DJ Khaled group cuts, at least you're never awful. You might only whelm, and I might think Piles is just an absolute zero of a person, but it's typically pleasant to hear you when you appear. DJ Khaled: not the worst since 2007.

94) "Sweetest Girl (Dollar Bill)," Wyclef Jean ft./Akon, Lil' Wayne & Niia

This would be a really touching song if it sounded like anyone on this track had spent time thinking about what it means to be a sex worker. Like I'm not tryna get all tumblr here, it's just, there's so many societal forces which combine to force someone into stripping, and these dudes are just like, "She used to be so nice! Such a shame she's doing this thing. Stupid money!" Like no there's so much more to it than that. But I'm also not sure Lil Wayn is in tune with the day's social issues. Also, heck is Lil Wayn doing on this song? It kind of feels like Lil Wayn was 100% on board with strip clubs for most of his career. This song is an outlier. I don't think Lil Wayne really think it's a tragedy when someone turns to stripping.

95) "My Drink n' My 2 Step," Cassidy ft./Swizz Beatz

This song is surprisingly good and I'm actually angry that the song I think of when I think of Cassidy is "Hotel" and not this jam. Cassidy's pretty much a one-hit wonder, but this should've been the hit.

96) "Firecracker," Josh Turner

This is a cute song and Josh Turner hits some gonzo low notes, but mostly I'm now obsessed with this idea of some country dude at some point calling his dick a firecracker. Like, I think it's nice he's calling his girl a firecracker, but there's gotta be a country dude somewhere making a joke about "don't get hurt holdin' my firecracker!" right? Or maybe we could use the Southern man's propensity for getting himself injured playing with firecrackers as a euphemism for masturbation. I dunno. I'm ready to move on, but if anyone wants to start making a bro country album with me, I am willing to chase this dog.

99) "Me Enamora," Juanes

This kind of sounds like the fun Latin song on a 2016 Backstreet Boys album. Like, it just doesn't sound as fun or as exotic as the Latin pop explosion of 2017. I think I'm just reacting to the presence of a dude playing guitar in the video. Like, that's how you remove mystique from a person, is just strap a guitar around them. That tells you he's the sort of person who walks around telling people he's a "storyteller" and Bob stop now before you just 100% rip off "guitar guy at the party."

100) "Kiss Kiss," Chris Brown ft./T-Pain

hey guess what nope

30 September 2017

5) "Too Good at Goodbyes," by Sam Smith

at first i thought "i have sang this song before" in the first verse and i was all "hey, thanks for writing my review buddy!" 'cuz like no shit he's sang this song before, this is the only song sam smith has ever song, the only emotion sam smith has ever felt in all his life is "melancholy" and his songs are bland and without flavor as a result, they're just pointlessly sad, also i said fuck you at my computer when the choir kicked in, like seriously of goddamn course a choir, titanic was less predictable

44) "Dusk Till Dawn," by ZAYN ft./Sia

You know what kinda ticked me off about this song that I'm not sure should tick me off but whatever? The chorus, where Zayn goes "I'll be waiting for right he-e-e-e-eeee-ee-e-e-e-eeeeee-e heeee-e-e-e-e-eeee-e-eeeere?" Like what are you trying to do with that long note if you have to take a breath during the middle of it? That rest doesn't add any tension, it only serves to take people out of the song and say, "Why'd you stop singing, dude? It sounded like you were just gonna keep singing for a few seconds. You lack breath control? Is that it? Zero technical skill, ZAYN?" But it's entirely possible I'm the only person annoyed by that. And it's also possible I just wanted to be annoyed at something in particular, rather than just pointing at this song and shouting "BAD" like I did in the first draft. Because hoo boy, this ain't a hot one!

62) "Love So Soft," by Kelly Clarkson

OH GOD YES KELLY IS ON THE HORN BANDWAGON. I WAS SO READY FOR THOSE HORNS, I KNOW HOW POP MUSIC'S BEEN TRENDING THIS YEAR, I WAS WORRIED THIS WOULD JUST BE A BALLAD FROM THE TITLE, BUT THERE IS LIGHT HORNAGE and also this is the best Kelly song in years. The thing her voice does when she sings "it sure gonna cost YOU" is pure and it also does a million other things because it just flies around this song, Kelly Clarkson is flexing on all these young women who've got a vocal range of "whispering." The last few weeks, we've seen a good Kesha song, a good Demi song, and this Kelly Clarkson masterpiece, and I never wanna hear from goddamn Fifth Harmony ever again, not when the standard has been set.

73) "I'll Name the Dogs," by Blake Shelton

one of my favorite tweets of all time said, "would you like some traditional gender rolls? my wife made them while i was at work," and that is all i can think of most days, but also especially while listening to this song. "you find the spot and i'll find the money/you be the pretty and i be the funny." i am too logged on to ever accept this song.

80) "Found You," by Kane Brown

i would like to rescind my interest in kane brown for the time being. "what ifs" was intense, but this is knock-off sam hunt, which is itself akin to store-brand wheat thins. whatever about kane brown's vocal work on "what ifs" has completely vanished, he sort of rotates between three notes, and the lyrics are completely devoid of character, it's just, "it would have been sad if we never dated" over The Electric Drum Beat. i expected better, sir, but i hope you can be better.

81) "Gucci Gang," by Lil Pump

...Well, at least I only had to waste two minutes of my life listening to The Trap Song. At some point, these songs will be four measures long and instead of lyrics they'll just make the fun trill noises. Honestly, the trill noises? Very good. I love dudes are just going "brr!" and rolling their rs.

85) "No Limit," by G-Eazy ft./A$AP Rocky & Cardi B

You know what I like about Cardi B? This is G-Eazy's song, but Cardi B comes on the track to say, "Put a white boy on a song, I might turn G-Eazy out." In Cardi B's mind, this is her song, and while this is not Kendrick on "Control," given how awful G-Eazy's verse and how cringey Rocky's hook is, I'm willing to believe it. Still, I'm really excited for Cardi B as she increases in power and becomes more and more able to take songs from the main artist. But not this one, I don't wanna listen to this song again, it's super bad.

98) "Pills and Automobiles," by Chris Brown ft./Yo Gotti, A Boogie Wit da Hoodie & Kodak Black

Yeah, I'm all good on hearing about the things Chris Brown does in cars.

99) "Let Me Go," by Hailee Steinfeld & Alesso ft./Florida Georgia Line & watt

We've given the song from the Amazon ad about a dog that wishes it could interact with the baby a lot of guff, but at least I had a reaction to it, which is more than I can say for this song. Why are there so many people on this track? How did Florida Georgia Line even get here? What did they add to this song that literally any other male singer couldn't? A second, even more useless voice? Who is watt? Am I supposed to know who watt is already? This song is dumb. I'm going to listen to "Love So Soft" fifty times.

Who won the week?

I mean. No one? 1997 was all boring, 2007 had a very good song and an ok song (Cassidy made the third-best song I heard this week. Cassidy), and 2017 has an incredible song, and then I listened to things that weren’t good for an hour. I think 2017′s gonna get it because “Love So Soft” is a lock for the top ten, whereas “Good Life” probably doesn’t make the Top 20, jubilant and lovely as it is. So basically “Love So Soft” is Kevin Garnett on the Timberwolves, just dragging a bunch of scrublords into the playoffs.

1993: 13 2007: 12 2017: 13

Next week, 1997 presents us with Aaliyah, Fiona Apple, and everyone’s favorite way to fulfill the Rule of Three: The Kinleys! 2007 responds with James Blunt, so, y’know, that’s gonna be something we have to spend time thinking about. And 2017 will give us a sassy young woman belting over horns, a tropical beat from a DJ of note, a trap song with a thousand trills, Latin pop IF WE’RE LUCKY, a song by a member of One Direction, and content from a shitheel.