#he's consistently been an old lazy cat tho
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tehloserprince · 10 months ago
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I was tagged by @santacoppelia - thank you! 🥺🧡
1. were you named after anyone? Michael Jordan, ha ha. No, really, my mom's a huge fan. She's followed his career ever since his UNC days. I love telling people that's how I got my name. For the record, although I have an obligatory fondness for my hometown team and a nostalgic love for the Bulls in their Jordan Era, I'm currently a Bucks fan.
2. when was the last time you cried? It's really difficult for me to cry. It's such a relief at times, tho. I cried a few weeks ago, when I realized my special needs dog was having some epilepsy-related issues. I've mostly accepted that I'll probably never see him with a grey muzzle, but I really hope we can share more time together. There are still so many things I want to show him.
3. do you have kids? Nope. Sorta did, once, but I don't really talk about that much. It was a good experience, and I still love/think about her. But my kids are all the critter variety these days ;) I enjoy hanging out with my friends' kids, but they're all growing up too quickly :/ What even is time
4. what sports do you play/have you played? I never really played anything professionally, but I liked soccer, basketball, and running when I was younger. I got into boxing and Muay Thai when I was a little older, and also did a lot of hiking. Unfortunately I'm crippled, so I'm limited in what I can/should do. I try to go on lots of walks with my pup and swim whenever I can. Sometimes I still wrap my hands and hit the bag, which is fun.
5. do you use sarcasm? No, never. (/s obvs)
6. what's the first thing you notice about people? The way they treat other people - especially the most vulnerable - and animals. Physically, eyes and smile. I'm more impressed by people who can be genuinely kind without ulterior motivation.
7. what's your eye color? Hazel.
8. scary movies or happy endings? Depends on my mood! In terms of scary films, gore feels lazy and boring to me. I need a film to get inside my head in order to be scary. But I'm a sucker for happy endings too, which is a lot of projection on my part, ha ha.
9. any talents? Err. Uh. Writing, I guess? Remembering a lot of random info? Friends are consistently surprised that I'll remember so many little details, especially if it's like ... me surprising them with something they mentioned liking at some point. Funny enough, I'll frequently forget why I walked into a room these days, but I'm glad some parts of my memory still excel! I'm also told that I'm extremely patient, if that counts as a talent.
10. where were you born? Charlotte, NC.
11. what are your hobbies? Writing, reading, watching movies and television shows (mostly with the BFF), random crafts, DIY home improvement stuff (I painted my entire house despite my health worsening over the years and I'm very proud of that), canine behavior/training, and playing video games. I don't have as much time for games, but I still enjoy it. Started a new game of Red Dead Redemption 2 this winter, and I've been spending hours just roaming the land with my horse.
12. do you have any pets? Ha, yes! I do a lot of animal rescue and have some life goals related to that, so hopefully I'll always be surrounded by critters. My beloved dog (Skippyjon) passed away in 2022 (old age and CHF). I had a cockatiel for 21 years - a birthday present when I turned 8. We basically grew up together, and the house is still way too quiet without him. I had other dogs (Smokey and Locke), and a lot of fish. In college, I had an "illegal" hamster, Kai (Kaizoku). He was fat and wonderful. I chose him because he squeezed past his siblings, sat in their food dish, and started shoving food in his mouth. King behavior tbh. I had a rat named Stevie in my late 20s. Currently, I have a deaf special needs dog (Oscar aka Ozzy), a cat that I hand-raised because she was found abandoned shortly after birth (Swayze), and a rabbit (Shasta aka Bad Bunny). At some point, I decided that all my rabbits would be named after soda brands, ha.
13. how tall are you? About 5'10".
14. favorite subject in school? Literature, Spanish, Philosophy, sometimes History, Classical Studies, Art. Anything that wasn't math, because I always struggled with that.
15. dream job? If I could make a living off of writing and spend a lot of my time doing animal rescue, I'd be content. Even if I was wealthy, I'd ultimately pursue a simple, cozy life without a lot of fanfare. I'd love to have more money to invest in animal rescue and local community welfare (kids should always have basic necessities imo). Maybe someday ...
Tagging anyone who feels like doing this! Feel free to reblog or tag me if you wanna let me know that you did it. Thanks, this was fun :3
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zeoia · 7 years ago
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A lot of my OCs either need new stories bc of my gross teen years or they just didn't make sense. And then others just had no solid story to begin with.
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slasherholic · 4 years ago
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omg i never thought abt jen and mikey together but like......wow so pretty. do u have any thoughts or hcs u can share 🥺
tbh I only ship them as a crackship for the aesthetic™️ and also bc a power couple consisting of not one but TWO gorgeous murderous bastards is too much for my feeble villain fucker brain to handle
bUT YES I TOTALLY DO HAVE HCS. they’re v lazy but kinky as shit because michael really really needs to get dommed i mean knocked down a few pegs by a woman other than laurie sOOO
*note: the film never specifies jennifer’s age, and neither did any of the sources I researched, so I’m sticking with my pre-existing hc that she was an 18 y/o senior in the movie. jen is obviously a legal adult here 👍
HCs | Jennifer Check x Michael Myers (NSFW)
*AU where Jen lived and went on to be a bitchy succubus for all eternity and is now extremely good at what she does
*warning: non-consensual pp touching ahead
ha, hope y’all didn’t think this was gonna be an actual functional relationship cause IF SO well then honey, you got a big storm comin
remember the jason x mikey ship dynamic where the gag is that mikey is basically jay jay’s stinky mean cat who gets sprayed in the face with water every time he’s bad?
yeah, so michael is jennifer’s bitch very angry, very fun pet. oh how the turntables, mikey
only jennifer doesn’t exactly share jason’s innocent nature ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
michael had been in the market for a new “s/o” after his old one errr broke
and since stalking jen made his pp very hard, she was obviously the perfect choice for the job
but when michael made his move on her, haha whOOPS
nice going pp brain, your not-so-victim is a literal man eater and you just broke into her home so now she’s going to kick your fucking ass
yes jen is stronger than michael, yes she can yeet him like a soda can across her kitchen, yes she can sit on his chest and choke him out against the floor, yes it all happened in that order and no michael doesn’t want to talk about it
in michael’s defense he did get a fuckton of fatal stabs in on jen before he conked out from oxygen deprivation
lol too bad she’s immortal dumbass
jen wasn’t expecting to be dining-in tonight, but oh well a bitch ain’t gonna turn down free catering
might as well get a peek at what’s on the menu tho, let’s just get this crusty ass mask outta way and—
—oop he’s gorg.
totally her type too, at least back when she dated boys instead of tearing out their livers
she’s not even -that- hungry, so like, she kinda doesn’t wanna kill him yet?
she like, kinda thinks he might look pretty chained up ass naked in her living room?
yeah she was right lol
also his dick big
tbh jen was only planning to keep michael around until she got hungry, but fuck, he’s just so much fun to play with
she figured out pretty quickly that he wasn’t gonna talk to her
but that’s cool, he doesn’t have to open his stubborn bitch mouth for her to know how much he fucking detests the cuffs he’s locked up in and her and the fact that she can overpower him
jen finds it really funny to pin michael’s limbs down and have sloppy make-out sessions with his pretty face until that nasty glare of his turns downright murderous
yeah it gets her bitten but she doesn’t care because that’s really hot what the fuck
he’s so feral she loves it
soon, she’s making a point of grinding her crotch against his bare cock as she sucks his lower lip until he pops a very hard and very angry boner
sometimes jen leaves her cute toy all alone afterwards to suffer with his problem
but sometimes, she reaches down and wraps one of her slender hands around his hard-on, stroking and squeezing and teasing until he’s beading up with precum, painfully swollen
and then she grips his powerful neck with her other hand
and while jerking his cock, c h o k e s him until he’s blue in the face, until his body is gasping and heaving reflexively, until he’s fighting and thrashing so violently that he’s nearly bucking her off
but oh my god, he comes like a motherfucking firehose
michael has never felt such indescribable rage in his entire life. not toward anything or anyone. nothing he has ever experienced approaches this boiling hatred; he despises jennifer check with every fiber of his empty black heart and when gets free he is going to murder her in the most brutal fashion his mind can possibly concoct.
and jennifer absolutely cannot get enough of him.
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maxinajar · 6 years ago
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Right fuckers, here we go. Imma go through all the points on that list of plot points VLD forgot about and say my thoughts on/ explain what I know of each of them:
Why Haggar was interested in Shiro - ya, they never really did explain that did they? I think it was meant to be that he was a strong warrior and the galra like that? But it wasn’t really explained and that was kinda a letdown
Shiro’s Illness - yes, what was it. Vld explain!
Cloning - I- just why? Why was cloning a plot point if you were only gonna use it once? Please? Explain?
Kosmo - Honestly, I luv this dog a lot, but seriously you can’t just have him appear. Explain him at least a little. We don't want a whole backstory, just one or two lines explaining him.
Keith’s turning Galra once and only once - I think this one's importance was mostly due to the fandom being way too focused on what the show obviously felt was insignificant. Though I do wish it was brought up at least once more.
How different species are biologically compatible - Honestly, I don't think this one is important. Lots of shows don't bother to explain this and it doesn't detract from anything, its just y’all being petty.
How Keith could sense blue - Yeah, please explain. Cuz that's kinda important. You could have just had like Lance or something sense blue. But you chose Keith, why?
Haggar’s appearing and disappearing maternal instincts - this one was just kinda annoying. If you are going to give a character a certain trait, at least make it consistent or give us a concrete reason for why it's inconsistent.
Why aren’t planets round?  - Were there any not round planets? Can someone send me pics? Cuz if there were, VLD that's just plain wrong.
The second colony - You don't just get to make something super important to the plot and then never explain it at all. That's just really fucking lazy writing. Especially since you only brought it up in season 6, so you can't say that you forgot about it.
What Matt saw in Sam Holts cell - So, this is another one that I think was just the fandom focusing too much on minor details. I personally think it was him reacting to the empty cell. But if there was something in there, Vld tell us what it was.
“Another [human]” mentioned in the opening minutes - Um, forgive me but I do not remember this. Then again it has been a while since I watched the beginning of Voltron, so please someone like send me screenshots or something.
Lance’s Sword - Yes, I wanted to see more of his sword. And the other bayards upgrades. Very few of them got upgrades and when they did they used them maybe only once or twice.
What are the blue lions preferred paladin traits - Yeah, I was kinda upset that they never told us. I was even trying to find any similar personality traits between all the blue paladins, but there really weren’t any I could find in regards to Allura. This is something they could have talked about again in the Lion Switch ep.
Voltron Coalitions distrust of working alongside the galra - is this one referring to the little bits of distrust we get that was never really explored and kinda felt like they pushed it to the side although it should have been a big issue. Cuz yeah, that was stupid.
How Alfor even knew about the Sincline Comet - It landed on Zarkon’s planet. Literally, right on his planet. Of course Alfor would know about it. He was best buds with Zarkon. All of the old paladins were friends before Voltron existed.
The implied sentience of the MFE ships - I never noticed that so I can't really comment.
Keith’s entire thing on quintessence sensing - Again, fandoms fault for focusing on small details that weren’t meant to add up to anything.
“Allura my only child” Alfor why you gotta specify only child like that - Because he only had one child.
Keith's dad's name - yeah, I kinda wanted to know that too. Probably they didn't say anything cuz the fandom had already gotten attached to other names. Or they just didn't think of him as important.
All of the clone subplot - Yep, never explained or returned to. Lazy writers not having a story actually planned out.
Shiro's Bayard form - Stupid Stupid Stupid Let Us See Him Use a Fucking Bayard you Cowards!
Altean Alchemy and its plot holes - Please explain everything to do with altean alchemy. How Honerva could topple the entire galra empire by herself but all of Altea couldn't defend themselves despite Honerva being an altean alchemist, something I would assume there are more of on Altea.
What is Voltron - Yeah, what happened to the Universes Strongest weapon? It literally got its ass beat in almost every battle.
Lotor - Please, you did this boy dirty the least you could do is give us more backstory.
Lance’s insecurities/ homesickness - while not a pronounced as they are in fanon, it was still clear that lance had insecurities surrounding him being a paladin and he wanted to go home. All that was starting to just disappear around the halfway point of Season 7 and completely got thrown out the window in season 8. What the fuck VLD, you need character consistency.
Found Family plot - missed opportunity you threw out for a half-assed love story that demeaned to characters and pretty much guaranteed you for failure, are you happy that you did what pretty much every other show in existence does?
Shiro - His character was pretty much not expanded on at all throughout the entire show. The most character development he got since the first two seasons was the first episode of season 7, nothing else. He is so boring but he could have been so much more.
The Holt family - please don't focus so much on this family when you push your main characters to the side and refuse to give them legitimate character development.
Sendak's obsession with Shiro - don’t change it, just give us some reason why.
What happened to Narti - Yeah, she was possessed by Haggar through her connection to the cat, and then Lotor killed her in order to guarantee the safety of the rest of his crew and his mission.
That's all I’m gonna do for now cuz I'm salty.
Link to the post I got this stuff from, there is more but I just couldn't continue it right now. I will continue this post later tho.
https://galtean-gf.tumblr.com/post/181565556929/grand-list-of-plot-points-dropped-or-not-explored
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danielesux · 6 years ago
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・:*:・゚☆ ( alycia debnam-carey. 25. cisfemale. she/her. ) ↷ ( daniele 'dani' nemeth ) has been spotted by the paparazzi in los angeles. they are a ( b ) list celebrity known for their career as an ( actress ). they’re known by their fans to be ( affectionate, humble, & open-minded ) but the tabloids frequently portray them to be ( lazy, reticent, & jealous ) . i wish them every success in the entertainment industry. ( michelle. 22. est. she/her. ) ・:*:・゚☆ 
hello, new friends! i’m michelle and i’ve not been in a group like this in many moons so i’m a wee bit nervous, feelin’ a lil shy, but i’m v excited. lemme jump right in and introduce you folks to dani. i’ll have some more detailed stats and such on my page later on, but this is all the need-to-know info as well as some stuff you probs don’t need to know but i feel like sharing anyway! 
her full name is daniele faith nemeth. she’ll answer to daniele and is known professionally that way, but 98% of the people in her life call her dani. 
she’s had dual citizenship in both america and australia since she was a child, since her mom lived in australia (where dani was born) and her dad lived in america. he moved there for work when she was 2, after he’d split with her mom. she wanted to have a relationship with them both, so she lived with her mom during the school years and spent holidays with her father in california. she moved to california full time when she was 18 and looking to begin her career. at first she lived in anaheim with her dad, but she soon moved to los angeles. 
she’s a 25 year old actress, who has done a couple of movies and a handful of smaller roles, and is now a main role on a popular tv show, but she hasn’t always done that sort of tv. 
she first stepped into the spotlight when she was 19 and was cast on a reality show on mtv. (something very close to ‘are you the one?’) her agent said it’d be a good start for her, and she blindly did what he said. it did seem like a fun time, and if she got to meet a few cute people (mostly boys, because of the show’s premise), then that was okay for her.
it wasn’t until after the show was airing that she realized it may have not been a good idea. she began worrying she’d never be taken seriously as an actress because of her reality tv past. luckily, she was able to capitalize on it instead. since her name was out there now and she’d gathered a small fanbase from the show, her agent was able to land her auditions. 
she got a few small roles right away, doing one episode roles on popular shows and having a minor parts in movies. her biggest role to date came in 2017 when she was part of an ensemble cast in a female-led comedy (think something along the lines of bridesmaids?? but set at a college and no one is getting married) where she got to work alongside more established and known actresses. this movie is being called ‘moon girls’ for right now and no i didn’t use some sort of title generator to pick that at random. her character was named elizabeth.
her role in that movie led to even more opportunities for her, the most notable one being her current gig. the first season of her new tv show is now playing and she is one of the main roles. it’s a horror show and spoiler alert, but she’s signed on for three seasons, so she feels like she won’t be dying anytime soon. (i’m thinking it’s a similar show to mtv’s scream. a murder mystery/slasher type of show.) the show has been doing well and is very popular with teens/young adults. for now this show shall be called ‘red dreams’ and no i didn’t use the same generator again, mind your business. she plays a character named savannah. 
so that’s p much the gist of her career, now moving on to more on her personal life and such. 
since she’s started to gain more fame and more fans, she’s been referred to as a ‘bicon’, as she’s very open about being bisexual. her character on ‘red dreams’ is also bi. 
she is proud cat mom, to a 3 year calico cat named chandler. when she adopted him a year and a half ago, that was already his name, and since she’s a casual fan of friends/chandler, she kept the name. she felt bad about changing it, she didn’t want to confuse him. 
while she worked hard to become a respected actress, thats about the only thing she works hard at. she’s a lazy person, always wanting to spend her time on the couch or in bed. give her some fries and other snacks and let her hang out in front of the tv with her cat and she’s happy. 
she doesn’t easily talk about her feelings, sometimes fearing letting people in and seeing her vulnerable side. this is a general thing, but when it comes to romantic feelings, she’s twice as guarded. this doesn’t mean she’s a cold person though. she may avoid genuine, serious talks but she’s still quite affectionate. she’s all about holding hands and cuddling, whether in a platonic way or otherwise. she loves being close and touchy with people - but only people she’s close to, or wants to be close to, if you get me. wink wink nudge nudge. 
some other qualities hmmm. she is jealous, usually with people, sometimes with career things, but she’d never say it out loud. 
she’s humble, almost self deprecating at times. 
she’s one of the least judgmental people ever, and very fair minded, and can usually see both sides of an argument - most arguments, that is. with major things, like lgbt+ issues, etc, she has a side. 
she’s sarcastic, but not cruel, always trying to be friendly and keep the mood light. 
she can be nosy as well, she likes knowing about other people’s drama, but she doesn’t have malicious intent, she’s just a curious person. 
she loves music and tv, and is never not watching or listening to something. 
she is notoriously late for things. she can force herself to make it to sets on time (9 times out of 10 at least) but for most other things? lie to her about the time if you want her there at the right time. 
she’s the person who lurks the group chat and only contributes by sending memes every once in awhile. she is a taurus and yes it matters to her. she’s an astrology hoe. she doesn’t understand any of it but she likes knowing peoples zodiacs signs and reading about their traits and seeing if they’re compatible. 
hey, potential connections and plot ideas!! 
a best friend, because who doesn’t love a good brotp??? i do!! a list, b list, c list, d list, dani doesn’t care and neither do i. she needs a good ride or die in her life. 
co-stars!!! because of course. her two biggest projects were the ‘moon girls’ movie (which probably consisted of a and b list actors) and her current show (probably other b listers mostly) but she had lots of little parts before those, so they could have met when they were both big roles or when dani was just playing barista #5 in their show/movie.
since i mentioned she’s v closed off when it comes to romance, i feel like maybe she’s broken a few hearts in her day. peeps who she got close with and unintentionally led on, and they wanted more but she was Not about to have those convos, so things ended. 
friends with benefits type thing?? dani is gonna realize she just hurts people if she’s not upfront from the start, so she’s gonna try that honesty thing, and it can lead to her and your muse having a no strings attached type relationship. bonus points if one or both of them fuck that up by catching feels tho lmfao.
a mentor of sorts! she’s still relatively new to the scene and is just now blowing up, so it’d be nice for her to have someone to guide her and give her advice. 
an old roomie maybe?? she was not wealthy when she first came to los angeles on her own and she would have needed a roommate. she didn’t get her own place until ‘moon girls’ was out and successful, so they would have had a few years together. their current status is up for discussion. 
some sort of enemies??? that could be fun. hatred is great. dani doesn’t hate easily but she’ll hate you if you want her to. 
like i mentioned, she is a huge fan of tv and music, so maybe your muse is one of her faves!! they can mutually fangirl over each other. or maybe just dani can fangirl and your muse can be mildly bothered by her.
literally anything!! i know i’m gonna remember a few more and be annoyed with myself for forgetting to add them.  
i will most definitely add some pages to my navi with more stats and details and maybe more connection/plot ideas, but for now, there ya go, folks! if anyone wants to plot, please do not hesitate to say hi. i am so thirsty for any and all connections, i’ll cling real hard to you. i’m excited to get things going!! 
p.s. if i don’t reply suddenly its bc ya girl went to take a much needed 10 hour nap. 
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owlhuikj · 5 years ago
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Therapy Owl Blush
Therapy Owl Blush
by hui kj
It is all to want to end crying naturally - to know better to save one grey, but it is her any way in her holiday summer of sonder she proclaims sincerely: what can I do as long as I am here this morning without space-self-allowed for unearthly, vivid backing that I know she knows I do not have but kindly…? Lightning made us still progressively more simply while it gave her infinity score. 
They never let their cat out; well, the morning thunder, we scared said cat, were  living fast hours ago, adjacent to sound and body rhythm because the drugs would not let us down tired but all sensual us three locators of thing-happenings, kinesis getting away from only me, and shame or not stance, all done with a rain dance - as long as I feel like I am helping - she calls it: Jupiter’s Juniper. The quite quaint house owners, them two over there - the boy tooting and her still hitting the pipe and me involved with true mania: watched the storm come in on the couch near the window and she said the world is not ready to end which was actually strategically spun into sanity - their mouths were not dropped like mine and we smiled for moments.
He told me that he can repair or let go with ease from a weary concern into the stable format regarding the ranking of best at lowest or curious in curious measure, we all with equal, strung out bed headed pose discussion in their living room where I am staying for the weekend. The paranoia passed after long hours, and all the colors changed in this summer of sonder right in the suburbs near campus around Cornell of New York, with the angry clouds scaring them but relieving me because every go at the rush enables me to focus on what is nature and what is nurture but hiss tone via meth until you shifted and stare: think a bunch. 
Save her, but nobody ever knew her like she has her - do not tell a soft heart to switch any lights: believe me tired, believe me I have cried at this. The six red suicides - famous around here: or the psychic nurturing mind submerged, spirit kingdom guide the one here telling us both she got an abortion earlier this month before she even wondered if it was mine or his, she mentioned while all tweaked out and actively bothered, that she progresses thru forward as best, gray pain not letting her make way for lazy insight for anything or anyone to blame; it is just what it is - she did want to tell us, and our lack of comments beneath or opinions at all, our current way of life empowered her immensely and we were more than happy to attempt to get her speaking on as she regarded but never attempted much out of just a extraordinary simplicity but when spoke: all vibrant she. Meth season parties all blend and form the stupid, very real angst of the submerged boys, us two who are looking up to her but the angst very much present - we are mustering power against the wicked bleakness of ourselves, and we, the paused, curious jesters, three conjoined all the way to the god’s and goddesses of Jupiter’s Juniper - we are going to wait around until she finds God one last time, never ending tho and the rain is music for any motion or thought at all to resemble what she could and - at times - could not forecast as our guide while there was definitely channeling effort but a morning for mourning from a complex sincerity which was accepted. 
Even if we waltzed over future from that choice from the woman waving of a one at she be too young to manage care and or just a lack of enthusiasm or exactness at this moment, but with sane and reasonable position; a differing vision that seeing the freedom and the influence: all have her men in her life salivate and scramble, but veined all the same before and after like always but now is in complex tamed release, but the boys seem to shrug it off like me for random, few day binges until my own empathy for myself stretches out the room and out the door until a life is going and manage individuality, although drastically drifted and gardened singularity that the boys think up even if she mentioned ecstasy and love: the brain is worse than the rain and anything or if remaining grays and she will look up with her long hair and she knows our God but they are the ones with the guns for living faced at doom, terror, or something that you could regret and conjure but seemed oriented with choice or not - defensive intruder murder, suicide, or in her mind - why she is blue - at bay tho her all around innocent either, look a rainbow - but she will remain altogether - and moved over where my arms today on the couch pulling her close with her paleness quivered shine as shiny spotlight in the storm, and the tv was muted and the cars beeped in the suburb streets and he, the other but common, would not know Jupiter because that’s her Lucifer Hell and all the staring at walls with her blueprint maps and symbol expression that goes on her shamanic YouTube channel or a simple notebook, and all the meth and the other same one, could be enemy, would not know Jupiter if she pointed to the flashing NASA Channel - but he will read about suicide in the paper in the summer of sonder and the drugs will not kill his empathy but he will let their cat get fat (?!) and invite different boys, and be the one to encourage a re-up but only ever barely chips in because he can barely afford to pay his half of rent with disability for his bipolar and selling his own chill pills all so we can blow holes in our souls and - every time - vaguely successful or not with a woman who does not need me definitely but he stays. They have been a couple for three years and I am past it but remain anyway.
Alaina knew one of the Cornell bridge jumpers who made a couple Poe posts on Facebook, which she saw in fact and liked even and then she felt that a darkness made all smart and emotionally free in a way and that he was nonetheless countering the grim and taking care of himself - she even invited him over but he did not reply. My aunt committed suicide six years ago after a different death in the family after the summer remembered every summer - I want to at least attempt to take the pain away before great goes without hope or the idea in construction…
‘Are y’all okay? Are you good?’ I sat up eager and pulled at my hair and looked back and forth.
She grabbed my shoulder and scratched soft with her nails down my back. She laid in my arms on the couch and she fed herself and offered to feed me strawberries while Zack played with his facial hair cursing at the cat that hid behind the tv. 
‘Zack, you should not have mentioned the gun…’ she said. 
‘Ok, Doc. I thought this is the sonder summer? Buddy may get like us…’
‘I look out for you.’ Her words spelled love. God, I love how she said that. 
It was their hideout-house welcoming a community of sensitivity; I followed the cat to the back door to be let outside, and at the kitchen the food made me sick from the memory of the taste from a couple hours back when bread was little prickly razorblades toxic to desire. Alaina reached for him and let him spoon after he asked for her choice of record to be dim, soothing background noise while my school work was in need of attendance still on the counter. The rain slowed down but the atmosphere emerging inside or out was more acceptable, but still mundane and grey - I looked over to them. She was curled up staring at the wall why Zack stroked her hair and hummed slowly and wonderfully along with the music. I tapped my pen and made underlines and notes on papers for my internship work as an aspiring prose editor - Poe scared us all. Nobody was tired in late afternoon in the sonder summer - dates and days unimportant, to be content if we can together. She started to take notes on her phone for a new video on how facts do not remain facts from the point angle of free choice, all piled up from her recent but at this time polluted indifferences that keeps her psyche buzzing but not shaking the world as she always does, this time damage felt - I love the empathy - she is consistently romantic, and that seemed like a fact to me. We are all thinned out by the grown-up squeeze rioted against and protested, she a leader - the sonder she felt on LSD when the snow dissolved months ago, where the boundaries dissolved. But this summer we became three hearty members of where the world will be when we are finished - but it was her high and thriving in talk of destiny: cannot sleep; wires are loves and the millions of them got scared away and I was not afraid, and every individual will change everything we agreed. I just have other stuff going on.
‘…and a prayer to parthenon floats light discovery against palms that will not clench but let go forever in debt to blissful hope in faith.’ - I read from a sophomore’s essay but the room aura and out the window kept it grey from a potential enthusiasm. Across the room, Alaina shivered, hunched over, still near zero physically and prophetically, and wept quietly while the boy holding her got up and sighed all the way to the fridge, and I thought to myself that losing on purpose in company only wakes up the in-between hope in faith for the new battle of the best hum where the two have the same song, just a different queue. 
‘What were you telling me Zack?’ I asked.
‘Well Buddy, when Doc ain’t here, we ain’t no family - eh?’
~
She was not an accident; who questions? I will see them next month to still wonder. At two in the morning all the clothes were back on and I grabbed my backpack and fled to the McDonald’s on my way across town to my father’s house. There was an old, black fellow wearing a red sweater flipping thru poetry and no one else in the restaurant but us - I just ordered a water and sat down in the back with my laptop all to have wifi to submit for my summer English course that is in fact the only real thing in my life but completely without close company ever hence the visit to home. After I submitted my assignment, I opened Facebook and looked at the Poe boy and then to Alaina’s page to view her Youtube’s latest but posted time ago. 
Every month she provides an optimistic lecture on a tension in a relatable society and has been offered lecture booking at Cornell but she refuses to leave her home no matter what, even if her 100k subscribers worship her undeniable compassion and insight that she is distances herself from, and does not check comments and has a stack of fan-mail she is overly sensitive about but always managing to connect what is highly thought about but no one ever made it a gift like she did. 
Alaina’s fingers ran thru her own brown, short hair, and I let the video play without sound and merely watched her hand movements and her fragile but sincere facial expressions bringing an extreme, opposing jealousy and a fiery infatuation that I was able to mute and mute but jittery. This all is completely asexual to me with a sobering acceptance that if she has herself under control and if a casual, distant friendship is what is exactly the reality and mutual ringing bell it is. At that moment be seeing that the world would be saved, and that change is not what we claim because there is no rupturing chaos: only that what I hold onto is the way it has always been. 
‘Sir, here is the pen you dropped at the counter…’ - then I walked out into the sonder summer night and got in my car; leaving everywhere, all the time as a life half-half there and here but never not going: pool party events on Facebook - I need some sleep. 
Around noon on this Monday there was a familiar voice in dialogue in my father’s house downstairs, and my tweaking drifted almost all away but knew I could not smoke weed for tension-release until the men took off for work again after lunch here. It was my dad’s childhood best friend who was here often because they each lived alone - one divorced, one widowed. In actuality, my only problem now was to not sound gay or scientific but rather wise of adult college things to say and avoid shifting into the words of how I quit my dishwashing job last week or acting like I was used to talking at all with all my zero, daily practice besides with the sonderers - I reminded myself this was the summer, and if I happen to get him to teach me a song on the guitar: maybe I will not feel like such a lost cause and if I am going to slash zen, I am going to get someone out of trouble or simply delighted even but besides myself as that works. When I was little, my dad would sing and his friend would play music - a fond memory.
God still hopes to exist and save even if I do not believe it or hear it witnessed from older men. If the summer of sonder does not exist: do I want it to exist?
‘It is the sonder summer…’
‘Say what?’
‘Community of equal value - held by quotes unsayable but acknowledged and cherished…not witchcraft, it is my friend…she is,…wonderful.’
His younger son’s were funny when we were growing up - my father acknowledged how well-behaved they were but they carried an all-alright-burden of the fact they would never not be good: they are still good of course, and their good will stay around outside of who is home - continuity froze me curious but pale, out for the same good anyways.
Zack sent me six emails. He said something ethereally vibrant had shook their space - he said that not only was the sun coming out and blaring forms in contact coming apparent, but the equation of love Alaina muttered and counted about but never could manage was fluid now, and their cat is on it’s ninth life and bolted for mission but it did not make them sad…he said that she would hold the numbers and every decision’s outcome was beyond apparent before, and saving any would mean pain - unless she redeemed suicide and conjured a contradiction that would undo zen to strengthen faith. I emailed back that I would check my schedule for an odd reason - my house was empty and it was the summer of sonder. He said the police took her away to the Psych and somehow avoid possession, and the other - just the other day was just the other - was on his way to my house. 
~
To me it was just the meth that had me drawn, but now… some things save everything but you just know the destruction pieces will be pursued and lately any system seems to me an unfair way of looking onto pain: an annoying mock-triumph when God let good and evil happen for all and all to take away some all for precious, false perspective on monument that had it’s strength all out, but who knows who that was? I knew her, the one zooming out by herself till Jupiter’s Juniper…even if my faith was small…
‘Her brother says she has never been alone.’ Zack said while moving his rook. 
‘So you want me to come with you to visitation on Wednesday?’ I cared of course.
Yet, in my perspective I was initially just a fan of her channel and close by until they seemed to like me and asked me to stay and never to leave because her channels are true he says, and I know her and I are the skeptics: Zack, the one that differs and is more about the meth and the television, and the one who never checks in on the latest about agreed, open frequencies and all the while the most horny. 
He proclaims Alaina earned her energy like a bird flying over a volcano, but he does not know how, and yet continues to proclaim he caught a glimpse of her wavelength and gave up science and logic to follow her as long she will leave a trail to orbit. Zack does not see that she is recklessly grey; so I open up the window and put on a record to smoke weed while he breathed slowly lying down on my bed. 
One-two-three-one too…this is the life. I miss my mother. She will visit me and I will ask who she is; ‘I told you to dream.’ She would say all peaceful. Alaina let collapses form for the purpose of saying the difficult things and unchanging no matter who was in her house or what was on tv. My mother had been to hospitals when she was young, but my mental state was not similar - she was a worried mess a giver, OCD even and found hardships with all sorts of health interferences like cancer. 
Alaina could not smile - even if she did she would think she was losing it and getting weaker; lazy too or psychotic. The hospital will keep her around people all with a schedule, and hopefully finally give medicine a chance, and give herself a break from cosmic mismatches or rings, both intertwining then imploding for the sake of reaching beyond reincarnation for the slash.
Alaina left me a voice message. 
‘…and that sort of thing - what if it would have shaped and shaped me? I am terrified but will see it thru. My senses are preschool and I have corrupted connections and if I am to disarm violence then it will be odd after. When they look: I wait or not. Ha. Catatonic or conscience angel they think. The doctor put me on a medicine and I blacked out: walked straight into a wall: fell and fell wstraight back onto my skull on  the ground to only ask if I fell. The group sessions at mock-shift pointing - I remember titles of poems but not the words and as long as some of these things keep the sonder as filter for��oops, gotta go! Take care…’ 
~~~~~~~
Someone took my picture and said I would be grateful. An old friend told me she had not kissed anyone ever, but we just jumped on the trampoline anyway. We jumped in the pool - one told one that I read their favorite book. A boy made hamburgers and showed us his printed photography. People embraced each other but I backed away - and the others that were backing away I wanted to embrace, but I just smoked cigarettes standing still as the earth spun in our summer. Even if high school was the thing that kept us on our toes, maybe frightened, and this backyard could actually be lied in and someone will come looking for you or not. You could be playing the piano and someone would fall from a balcony. If you tuck in an upset friend: you do not ever have to go to a party again but still can get free or cheap tattoos. You can refuse a handshake because of sweaty palms, but still turn on a song about spirit there and feeling lost. You will be best friends at a different party but they say you smell bad here. You can see Christians giddy off one shot of vodka, or think of dimensions on the floor where those photographs were laid out. 
You can work on mending your life at work or not. My aunt said she did not want to be called beautiful. She refused help and she said she had tried everything. I will never understand anyone. People will be worse or better off - go to school or do not - have depression or just happy - have purpose or burn out…these things do not determine value, and seeing Alaina maneuver Light while sacrificing her energy for the better of people - to love and look out for others, without ever suggesting guilt or bitterness: can not believe it.
The first time we had sex I cried looking into her eyes, and then alone when I went to the shower. Alaina will be remembered - not only by me but the world. Her video viewers latch onto the string of connections that the source would shape glory - yet, she does not leave the living room but remains the most loving creature with the love finding its way because it rightly should and is the most necessary story the world knows. Alaina will end crying - every woman shines and the rest of the animals of the world, and all the stars in the sky will align in her eyes: looking directly at me changing my sad tears into knowing safety like my aunt and mother are still here. 
Silly, simple me viewing pictures of ladybugs, jazz music, best friendships, dancing, flowers, trees, music, tattoos, laughing, blogs, coffee, paintings, names,…and the rest; all vivid and seeing with new eyes - heroes everywhere and everything everyday. And what a day! This evening the chosen boys will spend some time a girl named Alaina - I sure hope she is rested, and writing stuff down to share or not. 
We are proud of her, and the sun has been shining - we are off the drugs, and against her demons and grayness: we are coming together for her to hear about God and where he is at according to the one I trust. 
Zack and I waited in the cafeteria with other friends and families for the other patients, all will be gathered shortly. Myself, I was running my red pen thru some rough drafts with a new motivation of expression, and seeing how crafts build to reveal a moment in spectacle - Zack was calmly staring up at the clock, running his hands thru his beard, and tapping his foot very so lightly.
~
‘What was that?’
We sat in the parking lot staring forward. He touched my face and kissed me on the cheek. The hour for ourselves on the way home made me think of a specific medicine and guilt. Alaina looked dead - they murdered her with medicine and when she laid her arms on the table, looking at the table: she mentioned that they were telling her she was gay and quite ill with schizophrenia and gave her the disruptiveness shot that she was still drowned by.
‘Doctors do not know shit!’ I said as we pulled into their place. We closed in in the night thru the door.
I found zero inside but an ever glowing new hell that angels hinted that God saved - hint: are you ready? Do I want everyone to know? He told me to still. They, they, they, they, what? He asked, ‘Which ring of grace?’ - mothbethelmeen; familiar. 
~~~~~~~~~~
  ‘What if I dream of morning glee? - and an almost freedom stifled by a company I was born into. I’ll walk a mile in heaviness; starting fires but so putting them out because I just want to be alone. Maybe I’ll float and see the moon; a different, but my darkness around new light. But I get sick quick, become a star killer too. You have to settle and dream about other things. If you don’t, you may get real skinny and cut away. You don’t want that. I don’t want that. So you gain, make some new friends around lamp posts. You stretch out your hands and it is dark. The universe gets patted in and you walk outside and scramble for a match but it’s gone - everything is gone. You wail for friendship and get stuck in a four-walled-derange with nothing but you and your best friend: darkness…’
Dart responses theon / spelling bee AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH 1231_
=)
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tumblunni · 8 years ago
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Tagged by @branch-chief--faba!
RULES: answer the questions and tag 15 blogs you want to know better.
Nicknames: Bunni, Dan (irl)
Star Sign: Libra
Height: I dont think ive measured my height since i was a teenager, but around 5′6″ or 5′7″ or something? average height i guess
Time Right Now: 15:45
Last thing I Googled: “Endellion” cos its the username someone had in a game or something that was on my dash, and i wanted to know what the name means cos its cool. Apparantly its the name of a saint?
Last Movie I Watched: rewatching Finding Dory and CRYING AGAIN
Last TV Show I watched: Black Butler Book Of Circus, and before that it was ERASED/The Town Without Me. My picky side is so frustrated that the dub changed a cool name into something generic as hell :P
When did I create this blog: cant really remember, is tehre any way to find out? a fair few years I think, i cant recall if it was just after i ran away from home or just before?
Why I choose my URL: I’m bad at remembering stuff so I tend to use the same username and same password everywhere. (Tho spelling the password differently just in case. But cos bad memory i end up having to roll thru every single spelling every time I log in XD) Bunni89 was just the first username I had as a nine year old and it stuck. I wanted to be Bunny cos... it was the name of my plush rabbit doll. And my fave animal in general. I’m not very creative! And then the ‘lets spell it internet speak’ bit and the random number was just to try and find a version of bunny that wasnt already taken. Then I’ve just used that username for the next 15 years and its stuck so much that its even kinda my irl nickname now! Aaaand then just tumblunni because puns.
Gender: agender/nonbinary
Hogwards House: Slytherin cos i always feel sorry for anyone generically written off as a villain for stupid reasons, hufflepuff is probably more likely cos i have no special traits except being huggable.
Pokemon Team:  I try and have a different one each generation, like Ash. But i still keep all my previous teams pride of place in a special box in each game and I love doing postgame stuff and minigames with them. I get really attatched to my mons! I’m so guilty feeling that I lost two mons from my unova playthrough during the transfer bck and forth from friends’s games back when i didnt have a DS for a few years. my poor samurott and leavanny... :( Anyway, my current team in sun and moon is primarina, mimikyu, goloisipod, alola raichu, alola muk and lurantis! I wanted to have a drampa but i bought sun by accident instead of moon. And I also really like mareanie and that mossy anchor pokemon but they were so impossible to find that i only got them late in the postgame. I actually fished up an anchor friend myself but i had to trade for a mareanie :P
Favourite Colour: blue! and just the general aesthetic of black and white with one bright colour highlighting small details. thats a cool!
Lucky Number: 74 is my favourite number!
Favourite Character: TRESH GROMP GROOMPLE GRIMPLES GREMPY GROO y’all know who it be, i am not able to be silent about my faves aaaaand I have a bunch of other obscure minor character villain faves in other fandoms too, and just generally i am lame
Number of Blankets: Two, and a sleeping bag sometimes cos weather is so cold lately. We had like one unbearably hot day and then straight back to ice!
Name: Dan
Birthday: October 12th
Siblings: A half sister I havent seen in a decade... i hope she’s okay...
Favorite Smell: I have a really bad sense of smell and generally i can only smell really strong bad smell,s alas. Tho i do think gasoline smells nice and thats such an EVIL TRAP cos its all deadly gross fumes n stuff!
Pets: Had a cat, rabbit, fish and hamster as a kid, but havent had another pet for years. i really wanna someday be able to take care of one on my own!
Wake Up: consistancy is for the weak
Sleep: see previous question
Type of phone: i have no idea what this phone is, i dont know anything about phones. its some super cheap super bad touchscreen thingie i got in a christmas sale for twenty bucks
Love or Lust: aromantic asexual here giving a big ol shrug at this question
Lemonade or Tea: Lemonade. I am the worst brit, i hate tea XD
Cats or Dogs: Cats
Coke or Pepsi: Coke
Day or Night: Night
Text or Call: Text
Make up or natural: no makeup aaaa its a sticky face prison
Met a Celebrity: nope
Smile or Eyes: ??? WHAT DOES THIS MEAN. how can you compare the two. im just imagining someone smiling and their mouth is full of eyes. WHY DID YOU INSERT THIS IMAGE INTO MY BRAINMEATS
Light or Dark Hair: having dark hair is annoying when you wanna dye it, so i’ll go with light hair just for the practicality 
 Shorter or Taller: oh was all this meant to be about what you find sexy in someone instead of yourself?? cos im average height and i already answered that... 
 Intelligence or Attraction: wait this is a question about what you find most attractive so how does that make sense. unless it isnt...?? thing you most want to be: intelligence or sexyness? well i want everything except sexyness so there u go. 
 Chapstick or Lipstick: havent used either in over a decade 
 City or Country: both have their own good and bad points, ive had different social anxieties living in both :P 
 Last Song Heard: this cool amv for a movie i love pointless fact: it was legit made by the same director and animation team as the first digimon movie, its like the version of the script he wished he could have done as its own property. he also made wolf children!
Fruit or Vegetables: Froooooot
Anime or Cartoons: I like both in different ways. Mostly I just like a certain sort of story/art style/character lineup/etc and i like it no matter which genre it appears in. And i tend to really like the stuff that takes inspiration from both genres cos it seems they’re more likely to have that sort of stuff! Combining all the goodness! 
 Phone Case: wait you can buy cases for phones?? 
 Showers or Baths: showers are conveinient, baths are lazy. depends on how bad my day has been! 
 Dream Job: i dont have any dreams really, im a weirdo. ive never been able to find one. at best i flip through a few current hobbies and have a vague idea that it could be fun to be paid for doing them, but its never a really huge interest and i never try and work towards it cos i know im flaky and ive changed my mind a million times before. I hope someday i can find something that just clicks and i wanna do it forever!
Milk and Cookies or Doughnuts and Coffee: WAIT YOU EAT DONUTS WITH COFFEE?? WHY?? donuts are already soggy! thats weird! milk n cookies forever yo. or donuts on their own, but donuts are too sugary for me, i can never eat more than one without feeling sick.
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