#he's an asshole that likes dinosaurs way more than other trolls

[cowcrumb]

Ken’tro, my end-goal zandalari dude

[i-am-gusu]

The Picnic Date

(I still think titles on a blog no one reads is ridiculous)

Okay, first of all, can I say how proud of myself I am? I held his hand! I told myself I would do it and I did! I’m getting better at this. I still haven’t told him anything about me being here but that is for later (also I talked with Huaisang this morning, he came to the café, and when Mianmian was away, I asked him if it was okay to be stalking someone online and anonymously send them messages. He asked me with an incredulous laugh if I was trolling someone or something, and I just looked at him. He stopped laughing and then just said “If you’re talking about stalking Wei Ying’s blog, let me remind you that HE is the one who gave you the URL, that it is public for everyone to see, and that honestly he seems pretty happy with whatever you’re throwing at him. Except maybe money. Dude, stop giving him so much money like it’s lollipops to a kid. Give it to me instead.” I squinted my eyes at him at that and almost picked up his muffin to throw it at his face. But I didn’t. I’m not 7 anymore. But it’s true. Wei Ying is the one who gave me his blog when he tried to get me to join too. And his blog is public. I’m still unsure if it makes it okay that he doesn’t know, but... it makes it better. For now. But I definitely will tell him before I confess to him. If I ever stop being a coward and actually confess... That is for another day.)

The Picnic! (I swear, reading Wei Ying’s sidetrack monologues here is influencing me and I’m not interested in doing better for that because nobody is reading this damn thing why do I even care?)

... The picnic... 

It was... so much better than anything I could have imagined. Besides that idiot Jin ZiXun coming to pick on Wei Ying. He dropped it really fast when I stopped him. The guy once decided it would be a good idea to try and punch me on one of those boring family events we had to attend to when we were sixteen. I broke his nose and two of his fingers. Okay, Uncle had to pay for all of his health expenses, and I then had three years worth of punishment at home (I can’t remember how many times I copied Uncle’s rules. I was also on cleaning and cooking duties from now on (Xichen helped when he could, and ironically, it made me enjoy making food more)) but it was all worth it. Besides, that asshole picked on Huaisang that time. He’s lucky it was me, and not Nie Mingjue who decided to stand up and stop him... That might be why Mingjue let me call him Da-ge afterwards. And why he still gives me my favourite sweets whenever we meet each other. Why did I never realize this before now? Is this what they mean when they say writing helps with hindsights and insights?

Before and after the idiot showed up though, everything was. Just so perfect. 

Wei Ying arrived a little bit later, but he texted me to let me know, so I was standing at our rendez-vous point, patiently (and a little nervously) waiting for him with the basket (it wasn’t that heavy Wei Ying). And that’s when I hear my name, and I look up, and I barely had the time to put the basket down before I could catch Wei Ying, rolling full speed towards me. I held him against me then, and it felt so nice to hug him, even if it wasn’t an actual proper hug. When he looked up, that’s when I noticed the eyeliner around his eyes and. Damn. 

Okay. Every looks are a good look on Wei Ying. But that look. Was a particularly good look on him. I would have stared forever, but then he was gone, running after his skateboard. 

Lan Zhan… I don’t know if it’s just how he looks but sometimes when he looks at me… it’s just.. this tender look in his eyes. I can’t look away.

Yes. It’s all for you Wei Ying. I just love you so much. 

... Then, he took the basket from me and decided to put it on his skateboard to roll it to where we then sat, and while we walked there, all I could think of was how close his hand was to mine and how I wanted to hold it and listen to him laughing all the time. But then, we reached the grass and I took the basket again, despite Wei Ying arguing he could carry it. I just wanted for him to enjoy himself. He took the blanket from the basket (speaking of, it’s not Tetris Wei Ying, just a lot of willpower. My desire to leave with only one basket was stronger than the headache I got trying to put it all in the damn thing) and spread it and then I just. Dropped on it. And my back hurt from the sitting too long on the floor while I waited for everything to cook and panicked over sending Wei Ying too much money and thinking he found out it was me. And I was tired. And Wei Ying noticed... And it’s less the fact that he noticed that got my heart beating so loud, but his hand on my face.

(He’s still beautiful though. Take your breath away beautiful. Stop and stare beautiful. How is he not a world famous model? I bet he could pull it off if he wanted to. Be on the cover of every magazine in the world. Make all the girls swoon.)

First, !!! (also no girls, ever. Just you)

(Omg his skin is so DAMN SMOOTH? WHAT PRODUCT DO YOU USE LAN ZHAN??? I MUST KNOW!!)

Second, it’s not my face but your hands, Wei Ying! Please pet my face all day, everyday, for the rest of my life.

It took everything in me to keep myself from jumping him right there.

Third, yes. Yes please. I am willing. Do it. 

His hand was so soft and so... tender on my face, I just... I didn’t think. I just leaned into it. I barely heard what he asked to be honest, the feeling of his skin on mine was the only thing that filled my brain then. I even rubbed my face on his hand! A little. Still! I even closed my eyes, and I would have probably kissed his palm if my brain didn’t catch up what he said earlier. I opened my eyes then and got lost in his, and have I said how good his eyes looked then? Because I’m saying it again. I would have gotten lost in those grey eyes of his, but I had to say something other than “Mn” so I just said “you’re one to talk” quickly followed by “you have to take care of yourself too” when really I wanted to say “how about we take care of each other from now on?” 

What I said made him laugh, and that sound always fills me with so much love and happiness. And we started eating again. And everytime he would get something from the plates, he would sit closer to me. And closer. And closer. And I wanted to reach out and sit him on my thighs so I could have him as close as could be. 

Because I just want to be close to him forever. I want to touch him and hug him and be held.

Yes, just like that! And it was so perfect. And it kept being perfect after Jin ZiXun was gone (I am NOT talking about him more than necessary anymore, I said what I had to say before. He does NOT deserve the attention. Speaking of. I will talk with Xichen about buying that park. Perhaps Huaisang has connections to own it too? I’m sure Mingjue would see no problems if Huaisang takes it away from the Jins). I must have kept quiet for too long, pondering my options to take the park and surroundings from the asshole’s family, when Wei Ying pointed a wild bunny that had made his way close enough to be observed. I relaxed at the sight, and Wei Ying’s comment made me almost retort back that it’s not the bunnies I want to attract, but I kept quiet. I did look at his lips for a moment too long, but he didn’t seem to notice, as he started eating again. It took me more time to get back to eating myself, but we finished what was left quite fast. 

Then, we lay back down to cloud gaze and... I’ve never did that before. Ever. So when Wei Ying started pointed out at the clouds and naming things, I didn’t know what he was doing. And then, I looked at the shapes, and I saw the fish. I didn’t see the dinosaur eating an arm though, it looked more like a... well, a normal blob of cloud. And that’s pretty much all I could see honestly (I didn’t pick up that heart either, but I wish I had). And then, I saw it. So I pointed it out, the bunny cloud. And it felt... It felt good. Really good. To be playing this game that has no goals nor rewards, just for the fun of doing something and imagining things in clouds, knowing they’ll disappear after a few minutes. And I felt so happy, I wanted to thank Wei Ying for that. So I took his hand. And the moment I realized I was doing it, my heart skipped a beat and I was waiting for him to remove it from my hand. But he didn’t. Instead, he intertwined our fingers together. And kept talking as if nothing happened. So I squeezed tighter and put my head closer to his shoulder, trying to see the occasional shape he still saw while listening and answering to whatever things he wished to talk about. Sometimes it was about the café. He asked me about how long I’ve known Mianmian (since we were seventeen), I asked him what painting he was working on (”oh, this and that.” Had I know I was part of the projects, I would... I don’t know actually. I... More thoughts for later). Sometimes, he would brush his thumb against my skin and I would do the same. I don’t think he noticed those but I, too, never wanted to let go.

Then it got late. We agreed to walk a bit around. I wanted to spend more time with Wei Ying, even if I was tired already. Then we walked in front of the skatepark and he said. These words. 

“Fell for you right from the first, didn’t I?”

Wei Ying. Me too. So bad. I can’t even tell what got me then, or why it was you. I just know I saw your eyes, saw your smile, and you invited me for an ice-cream and I was already hooked. It was something in the way you talked, in how open you were, how easily you would show excitement for the smallest things. And I got attracted to all of that. It didn’t even matter to me that you forgot your wallet and I ended up paying (not that it’s a problem anyway). I gave you my phone number hoping it would lead to more than just an ice-cream and parted ways. And now, here we are. 

I took the vanilla ice-cream because I almost never eat those (you wouldn’t believe the amount of... excentric flavours they offer in those families get-together, and they would always be either way too sweet or weirdly bland. And having a simple vanilla one that actually tastes good and having the chance to share it with you, just you, that made it taste even better. And no, I never buy ice-cream for myself. Yes, I know I could.)

We ate, and we walked, and we talked more. I wanted to hold Wei Ying’s hand again, but I didn’t want to make it weird. It was one thing to hold his hand on the blanket, neither of us moving. This would have been something else. 

We may never be more than this.. but.. this is already more than I ever dared to hope for.

I hope Lan Zhan is in my life forever. I never want him to leave.

I want us to be more than this. When I’ll be truly worthy of you. This is more than I ever dared hope for too.

And as long as you let me in, I’ll be in your life forever. I never want to leave.

When I got home, fell asleep, worked, and my brother called me... But that’s for another post I think. I want to keep this one about the picnic. It was important for me too. 

[nova-network]

hello I just beat Luigi’s Mansion 3 and I have headcanons for all of the new boss ghosts

Steward:

He’s originally from New Donk City.

He used to be a taxi cab driver, and he died when he was driving home one night by himself and his headlights failed and he crashed into a tree.

He was one of Hellen Gravely’s very first employees, along with Chambrea!

He’s really nervous and kind of awkward when not on the job, but he works very hard.

He and Chambrea are really good friends and get coffee together after work.

Chambrea:

She’s a New Donker too, and used to work as a maid in a fancy hotel prior to, well, getting a job as a maid at a different fancy hotel after dying.

She died by slipping and falling down the stairs.

She is a really sweet and enthusiastic person when not under King Boo’s control, and really loves her job!

She’s a HUGE gossip, and loves to hear and tell everyone about the drama going on with employees and guests.

She and Steward knew each other back when they were alive.

Kruller:

He used to work in the Coconut Mall. Yes, that one, from Mario Kart. He was a mall cop.

He died during a robbery. He wasn’t attacked by the robber, he was chasing after the robber and knocked over a shelf and it fell on him.

He’s a HUGE fan of Morty’s movies. He can quote everything.

He likes to hang out in the cafe area at the shops with his Goob buddies.

Death hasn’t really changed him -- he was a cowardly goofball back when he was alive, too.

Chef Soulffle:

He was actually a TERRIBLE chef back when he was alive. He only learned how to cook after he became a ghost.

He died because he accidentally burned down his kitchen at home.

He used to be called Chef Souffle, but started calling himself Chef Soulffle after his death to be more “ghosty”.

He HATES mushrooms.

He doesn’t have a lot of friends, but he has a weird friendship with Clem, because he thinks Clem is the only other employee who truly appreciates his cooking.

Amadeus Wolfgeist:

He speaks with an exaggerated German accent.

He died of a heart attack.

Outside of King Boo’s influence, he’s actually rather pleasant to be around! But he’s also very intense and takes everything super seriously.

He’s not a full-time employee of the Last Resort, he’s just a famous ghost musician and composer who gets hired to perform there a lot.

He loves the artwork of Vincent Van Gore from the first Luigi’s Mansion game, and in turn, Vincent Van Gore is a big fan of his music! But they’ve never actually met in person.

King MacFrights:

He is not and was never a king. He’s just an old ghost warrior who got a job as a hotel mascot.

But he doesn’t really understand modern life, so he thinks he’s a king now.

He died in battle. Probably in a battle fought over something really stupid.

He sounds very, very Scottish, and when he’s angry, nobody else at the Last Resort can understand what in the world he’s saying.

The castle movie in Paranormal Productions is based on the battle where he died! But it’s extremely historically inaccurate, because the only source Morty has is King MacFrights himself, and MacFrights loves to make stuff up.

Dr. Potter:

He names all of his plants. Most of them have very silly names, like “Chompy” or “Pokey Pete”. Some of them have names that reference other Mario characters instead, like “Vivian”.

He died of old age.

He loves to play board games.

Even outside of King Boo’s influence, he’s kind of a jerk, and likes to mess with people and make fun of them.

He gets along really well with little kids, though.

Morty:

He’s from Diamond City, home of Wario!

He died when he was filming a movie on a skyscraper in the rain and he fell off the roof.

He’s just so wrapped up in his own little world of film direction that he has absolutely no idea what’s going on in the rest of the hotel and is totally immune to King Boo’s influence over ghosts.

He and Amadeus Wolfgeist are really good friends.

He makes all the commercials for the Last Resort.

Ug:

He’s not an employee. He’s not even a paying guest. He’s just here because Hellen Gravely bought the dinosaur skeleton he was haunting.

He is really, really dumb. Not in a “cavemen are stereotypically dumb” way, just that Ug, specifically, is a really dumb caveman.

He died because he tried to fight a T. Rex by himself and it ate him. That’s the one whose skeleton he’s haunting.

He’s originally from the Cascade Kingdom in Super Mario Odyssey.

He literally cannot tell the difference between Luigi and Gooigi. That’s why he keeps trying to eat Gooigi with the T. Rex skeleton in his boss battle.

Clem:

Even outside of King Boo’s Influence, Clem is really obnoxious and kind of mean. He’s just a total hick and doesn’t really know how to act in a place like the Last Resort.

The reason he’s such an asshole (normally) is because he’s really insecure about his intelligence. Clem is very smart, but he knows people probably think he’s stupid because he’s such a lazy hillbilly.

He died in a work accident, where he was electrocuted.

He loves to eat fancy food like what Chef Soulffle cooks, but he’s too lazy to go up and get some most of the time, so he mostly just eats junk food.

ALL of the rubber ducks in the hotel are his. He thinks it’s funny to leave them in weird places.

Serpci:

She’s not an employee, she’s a VIP guest!

She was a princess in the ancient Birabuto/Pyrapt Kingdom of what is now Sarasaland.

She died from being bitten by a venomous snake.

She likes to occasionally check up on modern Sarasaland, so she knows about Princess Daisy! But they’ve never met, and she has no idea about Daisy’s involvement with Luigi.

She actually has a rather silly personality. She loves practical jokes, weird puzzles, and trolling people in general. Her hotel room is right on top of what is almost certainly an escape room for ghosts, after all.

Nikki, Lindsey and Ginny:

Nikki is the ponytail one, Lindsey is the short pigtails one, and Ginny is the long pigtails one.

They died during a magic show, when they set up some special effects wrong and accidentally set off an explosion. They still finished the show -- as ghosts.

They love to play video games!

Like Amadeus Wolfgeist, they’re not full-time employees. Rather, they’re celebrity magicians, and the Last Resort hires them for magic show gigs.

They think Serpci is just THE COOLEST, and in turn, Serpci loves their magic shows and trickster style!

Captain Fishook:

He’s a VIP guest too, like Serpci.

That’s not, specifically, his pirate ship that he possesses during his boss battle -- it’s a pirate ship, but it’s technically just a special VIP seating area for the Spectral Catch seafood restaurant that has been styled as a pirate ship.

He died while fighting a rival pirate crew over some treasure, and one of them fired a harpoon into his eye.

He thinks King MacFrights is absolutely hilarious.

The Oozers from his boss battle are actually from his old pirate crew!

Johnny Deepend:

He’s not an employee, he’s a guest. But he’s not a special VIP guest. He’s just a normal guest who happens to be a really strong ghost.

His death was really stupid. He didn’t even drown. He wanted to swim some laps for his fitness routine, but the indoor pool near his house was closed for repairs. So he broke into the indoor pool in the middle of the night, but all the lights were off, and he accidentally did a big dive into the shallow end and hit his head and died.

He likes to go to the Museum of Unnatural History, because he thinks dinosaurs are WAY COOL.

Because of this, he’s friends with Ug. Neither one has any idea what the other is actually saying, though.

He didn’t actually figure out that Gooigi is weak to water until he squirted him. He just does that at everyone.

DJ Phantasmagloria:

She died during a wild outdoor concert. She set her speakers so loud that it caused the roof over the stage to collapse on her when she turned them up to full blast.

Her real name is just Gloria, Phantasmagloria is her stage name.

She likes Amadeus Wolfgeist’s music, but he doesn’t like her music.

In addition to being a mega-popular DJ, she’s also known among ghosts for being a really talented freestyle rapper!

She’s from Diamond City, like Morty, but she didn’t meet Morty until after they both became ghosts and got jobs at the Last Resort.

Hellen Gravely:

She’s also a New Donker! But she (and her original employees, Steward and Chambrea) never met Mario or Luigi while she was alive, because she died before they were even born.

She died of illness when she was old, which is why her true appearance looks the way it does.

Polterkitty is actually way older than she is, though.

She’s not exactly in love with King Boo. It’s more like that Hark! A Vagrant comic with Jules Verne and Edgar Allan Poe, with Hellen just being an obsessive loony fangirl.

She built the Last Resort on the site of an old mansion. It’s a Luigi’s Mansion game, after all, the mansion just isn’t actually there anymore.

BONUS!

Hammers are the ghosts of Thwomps.

[cwartsy]

I think Baxter would be strict as a parent but fair. He’d make his children do chores from a young age to make sure they learn responsibility and know how to take care of themselves as adults. He’d be firm with his rules but every rule he has would be within reason and within his children's best interest. He’d also believes he and Alastor should follow the same rules in place for their children while in their presence because otherwise, it wouldn’t be fair on them. But he takes it a step further. He thinks he and Alastor should face the same consequences for breaking the rules as their child would. For example, somebody on Tumblr came up with this headcanon that if Baxter’s child swore in front of him, he would pop a tablet in their mouth that would be harmless but disgusting. So they learn they learn not to say that word if they don’t want the tablet. I’m totally on board with this but I think if Alastor swore around their child, he’d get the tablet too.

Alastor meanwhile would be much more laid back and mostly focuses on having fun with his kids. He’d find any mischief they have to be delightful and probably encourage it.

Despite being the stricter and more serious parent, Baxter is more than capable of being fun for his children. He is kind of a not-now-I’m-busy parent since he’s a workaholic but instead of telling them that, he’d tell them, “Just a moment, darling. I’ve just got to get this thing done and then I’ll gladly play.” And he will. He’d finish up whatever he was doing as quickly as possible and join in on the fun, even if he was planning on working for a few more hours. He’d play games with them, he’d muck about. He’d make up new games so his children are never bored. He’d delight in making them smile. 

Alastor is kind of a troll when it comes to disciplining his kids. He’d come up with many creative and terrible ways to punish his kids if they misbehave. For example, say his children grew up hating a character on TV. Let’s say, Barney the Dinosaur. Because everyone fucking hates Barney the Dinosaur. He’ll tell his children if they didn’t behave, Barney the Dinosaur would come. This would work for a while but naturally his children stop believing it. But Alastor would be prepared for this. When that day comes, he’ll hire someone to dress in a Barney the Dinosaur costume and come to his house to “entertain” the children. When really, when that purple dinosaur comes through the door, the kids jaws will drop in shock an horror. They’ll be as good as gold until they’re old enough to realise that was just some guy in a costume and their dad is an asshole. Then Alastor will wonder why his children have stopped talking to him all of a sudden.

They would decide to educate their children at home rather than send them to school. That’s how Alastor’s parents educated him and to this day, Alastor believes they couldn’t have made a better decision. Meanwhile Baxter’s first job was as a school teacher so he’s very confident he can give their children a good education. Especially with Alastor by his side. 

While they would be confident in their decision, they would be concerned that it might isolate their child and deprive them of a social life, as school is a main place for children to make friends. So their solution would be to send them to as many clubs and activity groups as possible so they can spend time with other children, and also so they can try new things. 

They would like their children to learn to play a musical instrument but wouldn’t force them if they didn’t want to. If they did want to however, family jamming sessions would be common place. 

Wouldn't hesitate to send their children to school if they told them they wanted to go. 

Alastor would definitely be the type of parent to sing his children to sleep while Baxter would read to them every night.

Baxter would be pretty insistent on sending his children to martial arts lessons so they can learn self defence. Unless they inherited Alastor’s powers, then it wouldn't be nessercary.

They would both be ferociously protective of their children. You don’t want to know what would happen to someone if they hurt their kids.

They’d background check all their children’s boyfriends/girlfriends as soon as they start dating to ensure their love life is happy and loser/douchebag/creep/homicidal maniac free.

If a potential partner turns out to be particularly concerning, no one ever sees them again.

If their children ever have any problems with bullies growing up, they won’t for long. 

They’d watch children’s shows with their kids. Partly to spend quality time with them and partly to monitor what they’re watching and ensure it’s appropriate. They quite enjoy it despite the gruelling baby and toddler years when nearly every program they watched made them think, what the fuck is this? Is this supposed to be educational? How? I feel dumber watching this!

They watched Caillou with them once. Caillou is now banned. 

Captain Pugwash is also banned. You can imagine their horror when the captain said, “Ready the sails, Master Bate!”

Since having children, Baxter has developed quite an extensive list of things banned from their household. But to be fair, all of the things on that banned list are very reasonable. Such as no flamethrowers, no crawling along the ceiling no and no eating anything Angel Dust bakes. 

They would both set their own parents as examples when raising their children but in complete opposite ways. Alastor adored his parents. He would always take their parenting methods into account when raising his children and often use them himself. He would ask himself what his parents would do whenever he faces a difficult parenting problem. Baxter on the other hand, despised his parents and long ago vowed never to do anything they did him to his own child. Everything they did, Baxter would see as an example of what not to do. 

They would certainly consider adopting a child. They may even choose it over involving a surrogate mother or creating a child themselves with their DNA and various forms of science and magic. They might adopt and have their own children but regardless of where they got them from, they would love them equally. 

[verdigrisprowl]

Sept 24 Dancitron Movie Night - Assassin’s Creed

Prowl wasn’t here because this movie was chock full of so much back-of-the-neck mind-invading.

Today opatoes 7:58 pm /Smokescreen's coming in, much shorter than he was last week but here, at least!/ Kelpy 7:59 pm Fire. opatoes 7:59 pm Soundwave, I need to find you the terrible lifehack videos! NoodlesAtNight 7:59 pm *Soundwave stares at Smokescreen with his arms half full of bowls for the bar.* [[No. No, you don't. ... What in Pit happened to you.]] [[Greetings, Swerve.]] Kelpy 8:00 pm Hey Soundwave. opatoes 8:00 pm ... Every time a greyface hugs me, I shrink by an inch. /He is about 5 feet at the moment./ SCProwl 8:00 pm ((o h my gd whyyyyyyy SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:00 pm *the dragon wanders in, fluffy and bearing treats as always! she got fancy this time, with delicate syrups and intricate carvings, but they're still the tasty dragon treats everyone knows and loves* Hello, Soundwave, Ravage, everyone! Darkscream 8:01 pm [skreeee Chaoit 8:01 pm ((HI! Today Darkscream 8:01 pm [rabbit don't you DARE go to hell on me I swear to Primus NoodlesAtNight 8:01 pm [[Good evening, dragon. And smack them if they insist on hugging you.]] opatoes 8:01 pm /Smokescreen is practically running after the treats!/ MedicalMurdersaurus 8:02 pm *stops outside to roll around in the dust and what not* Kelpy 8:02 pm I had a thought and then I forgot it. opatoes 8:02 pm I would if I could, Soundwave. On the bright side, every time I hug a Cybertronian, I grow an inch, so I guess I need to get really close with someone soon! Darkscream 8:02 pm [*intense squinting at rabbit for the glitching* NoodlesAtNight 8:02 pm [[Don't you dare.]] ((if it's being awful refresh)) opatoes 8:03 pm Don't I dare? MedicalMurdersaurus 8:03 pm *huffs, this is not up to his standards* *promptly stops caring and sprints inside to find Bird* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:04 pm *the dragon puffs up, interposing all tiny feet of herself between Soundwave and Smokescreen* You don't dare! *grr. such fierce. much protect. very power. wow.* NoodlesAtNight 8:04 pm *What an amazing and wonderful dragon. He must find her more butter.* [[Thank you for saving him.]] opatoes 8:04 pm Wait, THAT'S what you're worried about? I'm not gonna hug a bot that doesn't want to be hugged. Darkscream 8:04 pm [Okay it seems to be better now] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:05 pm Bird! NoodlesAtNight 8:05 pm [[Oh. Good. In that case, enjoy the bar treats.]] *Waves a hand in that direction and sits.* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:05 pm Bird? NoodlesAtNight 8:05 pm {{What?}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:05 pm Hi Bird : > NoodlesAtNight 8:05 pm {{Hello.}} Chaoit 8:05 pm -trots in, yawning a bit- SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:05 pm Good! *the dragon preens herself proudly, before going back to her treat cart and continuing to place them where they belong.* NoodlesAtNight 8:05 pm *Does this Blaster EVER get sleep? Soundwave must wonder.* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:06 pm Me Swoop miss You! : > opatoes 8:06 pm Thank you, Soundwave. You don't know how hungry I am right now! /He's practically throwing himself at the bar, ready to help himself!/ Chaoit 8:06 pm -nightmares, Soundwave. They tend to cut sleep short- Kelpy 8:07 pm This video name is very misleading. These are crafts, not life hacks. Why did they lie. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:07 pm ((literally why would you want that)) ((rope covered lightbulbs seem like an invitation to have someone accidentally smash one and cut themselves up)) opatoes 8:07 pm ((HONESTLY some lifehacks are just... not lifehacks at all opatoes 8:08 pm ... Wait, you can do that? OH Chaoit 8:08 pm ((what the fuck no, don't do that opatoes 8:08 pm Oh, I thought they were replacing the glass or something I want a weird bottle shaped light SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:08 pm ((I'm torn between agreeing or a sarcastic comment on about how not everyone is a pterodactyl with big pterodactyl wings)) opatoes 8:08 pm Idea #1: Static fingers Darkscream 8:10 pm Peers in through the doorway - are they even inside - before coming in. Dipping her wings down to keep them out of the way before coming inside. Huh. There are quite a few more mechs here than she thought. Welp. This is going to be an interesting night! chronosmith 8:12 pm ((omg i love thse crappy 5 minute craft videos)) opatoes 8:12 pm ((i know right chronosmith 8:13 pm *this is the last week of the four weeks his offering of exotic space caviar has awarded him free drinks, Whirl is already up at that bar* opatoes 8:13 pm What kinda statement would it be to just, like, spray yourself in mirror spray? NoodlesAtNight 8:13 pm ((making a food brb opatoes 8:14 pm why pumpkins MedicalMurdersaurus 8:15 pm *rocks back and forth on his heels* Me Swoop want hang out more with You BIrd! Me 8:15 pm ((look at all this shit i am So Ready for the halloween aesthetic holy shit. it's time.)) Kelpy 8:16 pm //lmao opatoes 8:16 pm ((MOOD i should pull out my spider cup Darkscream 8:16 pm [do eit chronosmith 8:16 pm SAME)) Darkscream 8:16 pm [I'd have it out all year opatoes 8:16 pm ((i already have my anatomically incorrect dinosaur and spider skeletons out on display SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:16 pm ((TIME TO GET SPOOKY)) opatoes 8:16 pm ((i do! i'm just not using it rn SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:17 pm ((did that man just hot-glue his hands)) opatoes 8:17 pm ((yes SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:17 pm ((fear)) opatoes 8:17 pm ((yeahhh 😔 Kelpy 8:17 pm Those are some weirdly exaggerated scare responses. Do all humans do that MedicalMurdersaurus 8:17 pm *wiggles in his best "pay attention to me" dance, similar to a pee pee dance but a pinch less urgent* opatoes 8:17 pm I think so! ... Ohhh, they're supposed to be worms chronosmith 8:17 pm *peers at the screen dubiously as he continues to mix. The fumes from this Gaugebuster might be deadly. He's going all out* opatoes 8:18 pm I just thought they liked making everything difficult chronosmith 8:18 pm ((IT'S ME)) Darkscream 8:18 pm I've never seen any human do any of this before for Halloween... *Frowns at this nonsense that is going on.* opatoes 8:18 pm w why would you opatoes 8:19 pm ((video is just like "just put hot glue your friend's phone.")) Chaoit 8:19 pm -watching this in confusion- MedicalMurdersaurus 8:19 pm ((If you're going to be a big enough asshole to hot glue shit to the front of my phone, you better have the balls to actually slam a nail through there because I'm coming for you either way.)) Me 8:19 pm ((the most terrifying halloween costume: broken phone.)) Darkscream 8:19 pm [DON'T DO ANY OF THIS SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:19 pm ((you're so valid swoop)) chronosmith 8:19 pm Oh yeah, it's getting to be about that time, isn't it? Hmm. Gotta figure out a way to make my costume work. opatoes 8:19 pm ((... that one brought back memories with the chapstick Me 8:19 pm ((these aren't even halloween, they're just pranks now?)) Kelpy 8:19 pm //gfbfhg tbh Kelpy 8:19 pm //mean ones chronosmith 8:20 pm ((HALLOWEEEEEN pranks. ...buy not really)) opatoes 8:20 pm ... is this how to make homestuck horns)) Me 8:20 pm (("diy cheap-ass homestuck cosplay.")) opatoes 8:20 pm ((EY Kelpy 8:20 pm //p sure that was meant to be maleficient lmao Me 8:20 pm ((well they CLEARLY used the wrong colors)) opatoes 8:20 pm ((its gothstuck MedicalMurdersaurus 8:20 pm *escalates from his "look at me" dance to full on jumping up and down* Me 8:21 pm ((that one's actually pretty tho)) Kelpy 8:21 pm //lmao i just recognized the shape tbh NoodlesAtNight 8:21 pm ((okay bek)) opatoes 8:21 pm ((i knew once they put it on it was maleficent but the whole time i was thinking "homestuck?" 'cause i had to do that for some emergency troll horns once ;; Me 8:21 pm ((omg nice)) opatoes 8:22 pm ((that sentence already says a lot about me i realize but ascxvb the vriska horns i made before broke on me Darkscream 8:22 pm *More wondering why Swoop is jumping around. Staring at him then the video of nonsense.* Me 8:22 pm ((i used that super soft self-drying crayola clay)) opatoes 8:22 pm ((oooo! NoodlesAtNight 8:22 pm *Laserbeak decides to stop waiting to see how long Swoop will escalate the dances before it gets out of hand and waves.* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:22 pm *stops jumping and waves with his whole arm* Me 8:22 pm ((so THAT'S how you make a yarn wig SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:23 pm *now that her due diligence is done, Whirl is getting the fanciest epaulette* Hello! NoodlesAtNight 8:23 pm *Soundwave suddenly stops being off in his own head and looks around to see who all is there. They all get nods and pings as usual, with Rumble fighting with Frenzy to push and shove his way downstairs so he can hole up with Whirl on the couch and watch movies* opatoes 8:23 pm ((i feel like you could do the thing people do with yarn tails to make it more hair-like? why are there so many pumpkin hacks SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:23 pm ((TINY PUMPKINS)) NoodlesAtNight 8:23 pm ((starting in 7 get whatever you need)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:23 pm (🍕) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:23 pm Bird! Bird! Me Swoop miss You Bird a loooooottt! SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:23 pm ((huh. that's an emoji.)) Chaoit 8:23 pm Um.... chronosmith 8:23 pm *bobs his head at his epaulette; the noxious concoction is Complete* Sup? Chaoit 8:23 pm What was all that? chronosmith 8:24 pm just gonna drink straight baileys out the damn bottle)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:24 pm ((WHAT)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:24 pm Me! I am up! *the dragon tries not to look too proud of her joke* But, I also have been having a good week. How about you? chronosmith 8:24 pm not that I don't drink liquor out the bottle BUT NOT BAILEY'S, NOT A LIQEUR)) Kelpy 8:24 pm //dfgbrdtfgbgv hacks to break the law i guess Me 8:24 pm ((... why don't you just....... pour it in a thermos)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:24 pm ((literally there are ten thousand other ways to drink in public)) Darkscream 8:24 pm Humans have gotten very weird... Me 8:24 pm ((that is the WORST way to try to drink in public)) Kelpy 8:24 pm //not to mention it looks SO SUSPICIOUS Chaoit 8:24 pm Humans ARE weird MedicalMurdersaurus 8:24 pm ((I will get one of those wine bras before attempting a boozerrito)) Kelpy 8:24 pm //just shove your mouth into a sandwich opatoes 8:24 pm ((... i met someone who drank it from a ketchup bottle last tfn NoodlesAtNight 8:25 pm {{Maybe you not miss Bird if you get scope sight, heh heh.}} Me 8:25 pm ((omg)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:25 pm ((they're still drinking straight baileys)) Kelpy 8:25 pm These are insanely complex and ridiculous and completely pointless opatoes 8:25 pm ((specifically: they offered me a swig and i chugged it expecting ketchup)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:25 pm Pff! You funny Bird. Me Swoop GOOD shot! Kehehh. You Bird not here. Or Swoop not. Or BOTH. : < SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:26 pm ((smokeymun you are exactly a disaster)) Me 8:26 pm ((... the fact that you chugged it BEFORE knowing makes it even better)) NoodlesAtNight 8:26 pm *The fighting continues all the way right up to just in front of Whirl's couch, at which point the twins look at each other for a long, silent moment, nod, and then peacefully separate to steal different portions of said couch* chronosmith 8:26 pm omfg)) opatoes 8:26 pm ((asdzxvbmncx id do it again chronosmith 8:26 pm i would rather chug homemade moonshine that ketchup, which I hate)) and incidentally I have had homemmade moonshine, which was brought to me ina water bottle)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:26 pm ((... what)) chronosmith 8:26 pm good stuff)) NoodlesAtNight 8:26 pm {{Bird busy many often times. It work! You Swoop got work too.}} opatoes 8:26 pm ((: o SCProwl 8:26 pm ((reading books is for wimmin, gotta watch sportsball Chaoit 8:26 pm ............. Chaoit 8:27 pm Um.... SCProwl 8:27 pm ((that's all i took from that guy ruining that book is that's what he thinks NoodlesAtNight 8:27 pm *Soundwave sees a new face here. Who is the blue and black bot?* [[Greetings. Designation?]] chronosmith 8:27 pm *shrugs* Incredibly boring and monotonous. Which is not IDEAL. I almost wish someone else would come screaming down to Cybertron to try and collect my damn bounty. At least THEN I'd have something to DO that isn't... *shudders* Regular old hard WORK. Darkscream 8:27 pm *Facepalms.* These are things not even John would do! NoodlesAtNight 8:27 pm ((oh look it's soundwave's mouth)) opatoes 8:28 pm ((PPHFHFPH Kelpy 8:28 pm These are the most pointless "hacks". Why are they doing thins MedicalMurdersaurus 8:28 pm *twists his torso back and forth so his arms and wings get flailed loosely around as he levels Laserbeak with his best exasperated face* Me Swoop not wooooorrrkk. Me Swoop hang out. Want to hang out with You Bird! opatoes 8:28 pm these dont hack my life at all 😔 NoodlesAtNight 8:28 pm {{Then you Swoop sit. Us watch movie in two minute.}} SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:28 pm If they come down to kidnap you, I'll have to fight them, Whirl. *the dragon is deadly serious* NoodlesAtNight 8:28 pm //Y'WANT your life hacked? Cuz I could do it.// opatoes 8:28 pm Soundwave, can you hack my life SCProwl 8:29 pm ((oh yes, just put tape directly on your skin Darkscream 8:29 pm *Turns her attention over to Soundwave. Assuming he was talking to her, this was the first time meeting, she put up a servo in greetings.* I'm Darkscream. Kelpy 8:29 pm Huh MedicalMurdersaurus 8:29 pm ((I lik ehow they tied fishing line ot her skirt instead of using a fan or hairdryer like a sane person)) Me 8:29 pm ((reblog to save marilyn monroe's life)) opatoes 8:29 pm ((asdxcvbnzxxcv MedicalMurdersaurus 8:29 pm *siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighs* Kaay chronosmith 8:29 pm Nah, fighting them off is MY honor. Sorry. I rarely share my fights, dragon. *and now at last he will make his way over to the couch, having quietly and with amusement watched World War Twins break out over the best spot* opatoes 8:29 pm lifehack: just destroy your stuff opatoes 8:30 pm ... what would happen if I did this to my pedes SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:30 pm *the dragon sighs, but nods understandingly* Of course. That's perfectly fair. I wouldn't want to deprive you of your fights. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:30 pm ((if you actually fell that away in those shoes you'd absolutely have a broken wrist from trying to catch yourself)) Me 8:30 pm ((PONYTAIL THROUGH A KNIT HAT THAT'S THE WORST LOOK I'VE EVER SEEN HVSGDT)) Kelpy 8:30 pm /gfhbyfghnhg Chaoit 8:30 pm ((just NoodlesAtNight 8:30 pm [[What in BLAZES--]] Chaoit 8:30 pm ((yikes chronosmith 8:30 pm Now, at last, we see what Prowl's special task forces get up to. opatoes 8:30 pm soundwave this video vexes and terrifies me Chaoit 8:31 pm Soundwave? NoodlesAtNight 8:31 pm *So that's Darkscream.* [[Greetings, and welcome. Any high grade must be paid for, but solid snacks are free.]] [[And yes?]] Chaoit 8:31 pm What are we watching now? NoodlesAtNight 8:31 pm [[Nothing, because it is time to start.]] [[And he has tortured you all long enough.]] opatoes 8:31 pm ... but what is this lifehack chronosmith 8:31 pm Damn. I should've known you'd protect his secrets. Chaoit 8:31 pm Thank Primus opatoes 8:31 pm soundwave please NoodlesAtNight 8:31 pm [[A periscope.]] opatoes 8:31 pm . . . Oh MedicalMurdersaurus 8:31 pm *toddles after Bird to sit where she wants, for once forgetting to grab snacks for her* NoodlesAtNight 8:32 pm ((WARNINGS: i got distracted and didn't finish but uhhhhh assassin guy gets his finger chopped off in the opening sequence (whirl consider yourself notified), disturbing imagery, needles, unwilling medical patient, lots of violence and death, a little blood)) Darkscream 8:32 pm Good to know. Not much of a high grade mech, though I might grab a few snacks. *Smiles at Soundwave then glances around the room again. Out of all the mechs, she only recognized three, not counting Soundwave, and only one she's met before.* NoodlesAtNight 8:33 pm ((also if you've never played an AC game don't let this movie stop you. it's a horrible movie but in a fun way. the games are way better)) opatoes 8:33 pm /Smokescreen's grabbing as many drinks as he can before jumping off the bar, running towards where round Prowl is/ chronosmith 8:33 pm ((NOTIFIED. Liquor ready to be deployed for chugging-distraction functions)) opatoes 8:33 pm ((... i always read AC as animal crossing so i was so confused for a second)) chronosmith 8:33 pm ((altair but as an animal crossing style eagle... )) Me 8:33 pm ((Animal Creed)) ((Assassin's Crossing)) opatoes 8:33 pm ((Assassin's Crossing Kelpy 8:33 pm //assasin crossing SCProwl 8:33 pm *oh right, yes, Prowl totally arrived while everyone was watching bad life hacks* NoodlesAtNight 8:33 pm ((THE EAGLE THING IS CUTE)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:33 pm ((assassins crossing)) Me 8:34 pm ((whenever i see AC i think Advent Children)) Kelpy 8:34 pm //mood tho SCProwl 8:34 pm ((same, puff chronosmith 8:34 pm I think... Armor Class)) opatoes 8:34 pm ((Final Fantasy: Animal Crossing Chaoit 8:34 pm -peers back at the flier, blinking. Kinda feels like he recognizes her- Kelpy 8:34 pm //final fantasy seven, animal creed MedicalMurdersaurus 8:34 pm ((only the brotherhood and also the possibility this apple is a metaphor, not a real thing)) Me 8:34 pm ((... omg i didn't know the AC plot was so..... like........ dan brown)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:34 pm ((it is VERY dan brown)) chronosmith 8:34 pm ((ye dude)) NoodlesAtNight 8:34 pm ((you have NO idea)) opatoes 8:34 pm man I wish I had a house that big opatoes 8:35 pm I wish I had a house SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:35 pm ((yeah it's really really dan brown)) Me 8:35 pm ((i had no idea)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:35 pm What are they doing with those knives. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:35 pm Me SWOOP have a cave. Dino cave. ALL Dinos in cave : > NoodlesAtNight 8:35 pm ((but also really really really good)) chronosmith 8:35 pm *leans back, drink in hand, and bobs his head, in turn, to Rumble and Frenzy both* So, how was it you were planning to hack someone's life, again? The old-fashioned way? Me 8:35 pm ((man that apple is probably pretty much dust by now NoodlesAtNight 8:35 pm \\AIN'T NO BETTER WAY. HACK 'N SLASH, HEH.\\ Darkscream 8:35 pm *Going to head to where the snacks were to be out of the way. Given she was about Megatron's height, it was a really smart idea to not block the screen. Picks at one of the crunchy snacks.* NoodlesAtNight 8:36 pm *Ravage peers over the bar to stare at her. ... She smells all right.* chronosmith 8:36 pm *tips his head back for the OPENING CHUG* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:36 pm Oh that's what they're doing with those knives. opatoes 8:36 pm ... I want a cool axe Chaoit 8:36 pm .....yikes chronosmith 8:36 pm *the fumes might very well be smell-able from across the room* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:36 pm Them do Spanish. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:37 pm You Bird do Spanish? NoodlesAtNight 8:37 pm *They are. But Ravage's nose is strong enough he can smell Darkscream past it. Not the twins' though. They can't smell anything but booze.* {{Si.}} opatoes 8:37 pm That guy's got a Megatron blade! MedicalMurdersaurus 8:37 pm Kehehheh SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:37 pm ((IS THAT GODSMACK)) chronosmith 8:37 pm ((omg i typed that up without reading all of ravage's comment we both went for The Smell)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:37 pm How many WORDS You Bird know? :V SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:37 pm ((oh no I thought it was the song from the scorpion king movie)) Darkscream 8:37 pm *Pauses and looks back at Ravage with a curious blink. Tilts her helm a bit.* Ravage...? SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:37 pm ((this is not that song)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:38 pm KAHAHHAHA Him SUCK SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:38 pm ((parkour)) NoodlesAtNight 8:38 pm {{Aaaaaaall.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:38 pm :V That a lot chronosmith 8:39 pm *returns his attention to the screen* Hell yeah, Frenzy. I mean, my first love is guns, but I can appreciate a good swordfight. NoodlesAtNight 8:39 pm =Yes. You are wanting drinks?= Kelpy 8:39 pm Um chronosmith 8:40 pm Huh. Patsy Cline. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:40 pm ...Is that his docent. NoodlesAtNight 8:40 pm \\I LIKE IT UP CLOSE 'N PERSONAL.\\ *Frenzy grins and pops a drill - but only briefly, knowing the Boss will get mad if he leaves it out.* \\DON'T NOBODY MAKE SWORDS OUR SIZE.\\ [[It appears to be.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:40 pm Hm. opatoes 8:40 pm ... Who's blood is it, then? Kelpy 8:40 pm What SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:41 pm I don't like this. Chaoit 8:41 pm Um What? Kelpy 8:41 pm So did he kill her or chronosmith 8:41 pm That's a damn shame. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:41 pm She might have suicided. Kelpy 8:41 pm Excellent start to a movie NoodlesAtNight 8:41 pm //Better'n gettin' captured 'n tortured.// Darkscream 8:41 pm *Good looking Ravage for this 'verses style.* The currency still in credits? *Not even paying attention to the movie! It is so silly even for her.* opatoes 8:41 pm those corn fields stink SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:41 pm Generally speaking, yes. Me 8:42 pm ((i see he already has a genetic predisposition toward wearing hoods no matter the temperature)) chronosmith 8:42 pm Yeah, but I'd rather go down fighting, personally. Kelpy 8:42 pm //lmO opatoes 8:42 pm ((PFF NoodlesAtNight 8:42 pm =Eh, which kind?= ((LOL)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:42 pm ((man this movie is all about super dark scenes with one primary dominant color)) chronosmith 8:42 pm Edgy. Kelpy 8:43 pm //visiblity wasn't a concern when they filmed i guess SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:43 pm The pair's bonded. Not everyone can handle seeing their bondmate tortured in front of them. chronosmith 8:43 pm That's why you go out fighting TOGETHER. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:43 pm ((am I the only one bothered by the fact we have to guess where the subtitles are going to pop up? I want it to go balls to the walls and just start showing up in the middle of the screen on top of people's faces. Go all in.)) chronosmith 8:44 pm Get a backup plan, some kind of handy explosive you can use. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:44 pm Why Him all tie up? SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:44 pm That is a better idea. Did they have an explosive, though? NoodlesAtNight 8:44 pm ((youtube subtitles are terrible)) Chaoit 8:44 pm ...... NoodlesAtNight 8:45 pm ((and generally try to be near the speaker)) Kelpy 8:45 pm Do we get to know who he murdered MedicalMurdersaurus 8:45 pm Oh. Them cut him up. chronosmith 8:45 pm Probably not, but that's their own bad planning. Chaoit 8:45 pm ...oh no chronosmith 8:45 pm I always have some kind of grenade handy. I've got one in my subspace right now. NoodlesAtNight 8:45 pm //Yeah? What kind?// SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:45 pm This is definitely not a psychologically healthy way to execute someone. chronosmith 8:45 pm Matter of fact--*nods to Frenzy* It's the one you gave me. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:45 pm Oooh, nice. chronosmith 8:45 pm Implosion grenade. Chaoit 8:45 pm ....what? Darkscream 8:45 pm *Goes to her side and slips a servo into a subspace compartment. Takes a little bag out to set it down. Flips through to find a glowing chip almost like energon.* Got a more hard form or better in trade. Haven't don't much trading here. *Takes a seat at the bar if Ravage doesn't mind.* NoodlesAtNight 8:45 pm \\OOOOH, YOU STILL GOT IT?\\ chronosmith 8:45 pm Hell yeah I do! Waiting for the right time to use it. chronosmith 8:46 pm *peers at the screen* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:46 pm He doesn't look dead. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:46 pm Dead chronosmith 8:46 pm Honestly, it probably would have been better if he was dead. NoodlesAtNight 8:46 pm *Ravage ducks below the bar to peek at the list Prowl helped them set up for conversions. He's down there a moment or two before peeking over again.* =It works. What order?= SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:46 pm Almost certainly. Me 8:46 pm ((NO)) Kelpy 8:46 pm What a way to wake up opatoes 8:46 pm This... Isn't going to go well for him is it SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:46 pm Most people don't pretend to kill you for good reasons. Me 8:46 pm ((WHY DO THEY DO THAT)) NoodlesAtNight 8:46 pm ((i hate that)) opatoes 8:47 pm oh! his pants say dr! so he's a doctor right NoodlesAtNight 8:47 pm ((he should be pouring blood down his arm)) chronosmith 8:47 pm Don't trust her. Grab the IV out of your arm and stick it in her eye. NoodlesAtNight 8:47 pm [[Sedated him right proper, he sees.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:47 pm ((I'd love to see a movie go all in on showing how dumb that is.)) opatoes 8:47 pm imagine if he just like. put the iv back in NoodlesAtNight 8:47 pm ((in fairness, gotham sorta did)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:47 pm *snickers every time he falls or stumbles* NoodlesAtNight 8:47 pm ((with alfred anyway, not fish)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:47 pm KEHHEHH SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:47 pm This is a very fancy torture prison. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:47 pm Him suck at walking opatoes 8:47 pm what a walk cycle! chronosmith 8:48 pm *dryly* The best ones usually are. *takes another swig* Kelpy 8:48 pm I guess they really don't like to show faces Chaoit 8:48 pm ...... SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:48 pm Fair. *the dragon can't really dispute that* NoodlesAtNight 8:48 pm //Don't flop over now, buddy. 'S a long way down 'n you ain't got wings.// MedicalMurdersaurus 8:48 pm YAH Movie stuck MedicalMurdersaurus 8:49 pm Never ever FLIER chronosmith 8:49 pm No, he absolutely should. He should jump. Darkscream 8:49 pm *Glances at the movie with a snort then back to Ravage.* Hrm. Happen to have a Praxis Crash? [*totally making this up*] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:49 pm He definitely should. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:49 pm Flier get away *blows raspberries* opatoes 8:49 pm None of this sounds healthy MedicalMurdersaurus 8:49 pm ((THAT FUCKING subtitle)) ((good god XD)) NoodlesAtNight 8:49 pm ((i missed it what was it)) chronosmith 8:49 pm ((KEEPIN U ON YOUR TOES)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:49 pm ((who puts a subtitle in the upper right hand corner?)) Me 8:49 pm ((bouncing around everywhere)) opatoes 8:50 pm ((i get that they're trying to make it match the location but like. just put it in the bottom center area!! Me 8:50 pm ((like a pong match)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:50 pm Well, that's one way to not gain someone's trust. Chaoit 8:50 pm ((ick NoodlesAtNight 8:50 pm =Praxis Crash?= *It's been a while since someone asked for a Klingon/Praxus mix. Usually that's the kind of thing their own Prowl runs for.* =Yes. A moment.= MedicalMurdersaurus 8:50 pm ((I literally feel like I'm at the eye doctor where they make you stare at the center and ask you to click that little thing every time a spot of light shows up in the periphery of your vision)) Kelpy 8:51 pm They're super bad at explaining anything anywhere Chaoit 8:51 pm .............. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:51 pm *the dragon winces* That's a torture device. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:51 pm ?? Chaoit 8:51 pm -nope- opatoes 8:51 pm ... So, is this like the cortical psychic patch but for humans from different points in time? chronosmith 8:51 pm I swear to god, these two had better not end up in one of those dumb romances. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:51 pm *don't mind her, she's just going to scratch at the back of her head* NoodlesAtNight 8:51 pm [[Apparently.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:51 pm keheeheh chronosmith 8:51 pm If they don't end this movie as arch-enemies then I call bullshit. NoodlesAtNight 8:51 pm *He's silently grateful Ravage told him to tell Prowl not to come.* opatoes 8:51 pm You know, for the patch's credit, at least it doesn't physically lift you up! Me 8:51 pm ((this is such bullshit science lmao)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:52 pm ((I know right)) ((it's so bad)) opatoes 8:52 pm I wish I had DNA Me 8:52 pm ((SEARCHING DNA FOR TIMEFRAME ASFGDKGH)) Chaoit 8:52 pm ((so much bs right here SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:52 pm Why do you want DNA? opatoes 8:52 pm So I can travel through time, apparently! Kelpy 8:52 pm //"Let's say science words, they'll nevrr know were making it up Chaoit 8:52 pm That...didn't look like it was....what is going on? SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:53 pm ...I implore you to trust me- that is not how DNA works. Darkscream 8:53 pm *Having no idea anyone else would of ordered the same, Darkscream fiddles with her bag of currency. Getting out the appropriate credits for Ravage. Everything on the movie was NONSENSE.* opatoes 8:53 pm ... Really? Man, what a disappointment. Kelpy 8:53 pm Did thery just dump him into a time portal Or did he fall into something else NoodlesAtNight 8:53 pm [[Of course it isn't. He's never traveled through time simply by inspecting a memory. If anyone could have done it, he would have.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:53 pm You can clone beings and create new ones with DNA. But definitely not travel through time. opatoes 8:53 pm ... Actually, can I use the patch on myself? I want to remember things. chronosmith 8:53 pm *sidelong look at Soundwave* NoodlesAtNight 8:53 pm [[They dipped him into his own memory, he thinks.]] [[...What?]] opatoes 8:54 pm ... What? chronosmith 8:54 pm What? SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:54 pm What? Kelpy 8:54 pm What MedicalMurdersaurus 8:54 pm hi NoodlesAtNight 8:54 pm *Ravage paws the credits off the counter and passes over the drink. Enjoy.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:54 pm Hi, Swoop. chronosmith 8:54 pm *now looks at Swoop* What? MedicalMurdersaurus 8:54 pm *waves* chronosmith 8:55 pm *nods solemnly. Time for another swig* Darkscream 8:55 pm *DNA time travelling is silly. Smiles as she takes the drink.* Thanks, Ravage. *Lets her wings relax, keeping them out of his view too, and sips at the drink. Sighing at the good taste.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:55 pm *snarls* Eaten take them. chronosmith 8:56 pm Wow, those weapons aren't obvious at all. opatoes 8:56 pm Actually, Soundwave- any idea if you can, like, use the patch on bots that aren't online anymore? Hypothetically? chronosmith 8:56 pm ...Okay, that was pretty sick. NoodlesAtNight 8:56 pm [[/He/ cannot.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:56 pm *SHRIEKS with laughter* NoodlesAtNight 8:56 pm *But he has heard that those with needles can. And that is frightening.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:56 pm *the dragon churrs delightedly* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:56 pm Death from ABOVE ekehehhehhhehh Kelpy 8:56 pm Oh. opatoes 8:57 pm Wait, seriously? ... How likely is it that a bot with needles has done that, do you think? They clean their needles every time, right? Kelpy 8:57 pm [coughs] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:57 pm Did the female assassin just beat a man with a spinning stick? NoodlesAtNight 8:57 pm [[He doesn't know and doesn't care to think about it.]] Chaoit 8:57 pm -shrinking back- I really don't like the general premise of this movie... SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:57 pm It's about rebels killing torturers and mind-controllers. I'm enjoying the premise immensely. NoodlesAtNight 8:58 pm [[Agreed.]] chronosmith 8:58 pm I know a mnemosurgeon who can. Or, he used to be able to. Probably isn't allowed anymore. opatoes 8:58 pm /Smokescreen's rubbing the back of his neck, feeling a bit grossed out./ NoodlesAtNight 8:58 pm [[Oh? Who?]] Chaoit 8:58 pm I mean how they're seeing all this NoodlesAtNight 8:58 pm *Takes note of Blaster's discomfort. Hm.* chronosmith 8:58 pm Chromedome. Only mnemosurgeon I know, really. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:58 pm Oh, the scientific premise is complete garbage, if that's what bothers you. chronosmith 8:58 pm His junxie doesn't like him injecting, though. NoodlesAtNight 8:58 pm [[His - what?]] Kelpy 8:58 pm Conjunx. NoodlesAtNight 8:59 pm [[Oh. Rewind? What has he got against it?]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:59 pm mmm-nemo opatoes 8:59 pm I know, like, three mnemosurgeons and one of them is offlined, another is a bot I'd never let use his drills on me, and the other- he's not that skilled at it yet. Kelpy 8:59 pm I never actually asked why he doesn't like it. Chaoit 8:59 pm -winces- SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:59 pm ...Anything you use to pull precious cargo is not that stupid, right? Right? chronosmith 9:00 pm Bad for his health. *dryly* Rewind has a vested interest in keeping Chromedome around. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:00 pm What muh-nemo means? opatoes 9:00 pm But Chromedome? How good is he at that stuff? I guess he probably shouldn't do it, but still, it might not hurt to ask him about the stuff sometimes! SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:00 pm It is that stupid. Chaoit 9:00 pm -heights! Nope!- Darkscream 9:00 pm *Watching the movie with mild interest/disinterest. It's all so BROWN and not very interesting.* chronosmith 9:00 pm Apparently that sort of this is addictive. *waves a claw* He's been trying to quit. Rewind's there to make SURE it happens. NoodlesAtNight 9:00 pm [[Addictive? He experiences withdrawals if he does not do it?]] chronosmith 9:01 pm Maybe? I dunno. You'd have to ask him. And, I mean... I saw him pull the memories out of a mech who had just been killed by a sparkeater. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:01 pm Gee, look at all those symbols just like the one that the bad guys use. I wonder if it's a sign. chronosmith 9:01 pm He's PRETTY good. Kelpy 9:01 pm I remember that. That's when I found my bar. opatoes 9:01 pm ... So, Apple got really big in this world, I guess. NoodlesAtNight 9:02 pm \\HAH\\ opatoes 9:02 pm Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all night! MedicalMurdersaurus 9:02 pm PFFF chronosmith 9:02 pm PFFT. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:02 pm Does he need his offspring to do everything for him? Make his science, write his speeches, put on his clothes? MedicalMurdersaurus 9:02 pm CURE violence? pffffffffffffffffffffffff chronosmith 9:02 pm I know, right? NoodlesAtNight 9:02 pm *Soundwave makes a note to install some sort of self-destruct device in case he ever dies alone in the presence of mnemosurgeons.* Darkscream 9:03 pm *Slips her bag back into subspace so she didn't forget about it later. Tilts her helm towards Blaster. Hums a moment then raises her voice just enough to get his attention.* Blaster! Come sit over here. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:03 pm Piteous traitor to his kind. If I felt pity for the creature. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:04 pm ... I'm going to compost every human in that building. NoodlesAtNight 9:04 pm [[Do.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:04 pm ((this is the most expositiony conversation I've heard in eons)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:04 pm I'd threaten to eat them, but I fear I'd get poisoning from it. chronosmith 9:04 pm On the one hand I wanna say this is cartoonishly evil, but I mean. This is more or less what Functionists were like, so. opatoes 9:04 pm I wish I had a brotherhood ... I wish I had brothers SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:05 pm Compost the creatures and reuse them for better purposes. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:05 pm Brothers are AWESOME Kelpy 9:05 pm They'd posion the plants. Me 9:05 pm ((that was SUCH a hamhanded infodump)) NoodlesAtNight 9:05 pm //Only sometimes.// \\HEY!\\ opatoes 9:05 pm You have brothers, Swoop? MedicalMurdersaurus 9:05 pm YAH SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:05 pm Like not being evil and wasting air. chronosmith 9:05 pm *snickers* NoodlesAtNight 9:05 pm *Rumble cackles and leans over to bop Frenzy.* Me 9:05 pm ((anyway i'm renaming the head villain dude jeff bezos)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:05 pm Grimlock, Sludge, Slag, Snarl, Slash. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:05 pm ((valid)) chronosmith 9:05 pm ((ndjwfd)) NoodlesAtNight 9:05 pm ((oh excellent)) opatoes 9:06 pm Man, I'm kinda jealous! Anybody want a new brother? NoodlesAtNight 9:06 pm {{...Who Slash?}} MedicalMurdersaurus 9:06 pm Her Slash is a RAPTOR opatoes 9:06 pm You've got a huge family, Swoop! Chaoit 9:06 pm -whelp, may not totally recognize the flier, but going over all the same- chronosmith 9:06 pm I'm good. The last thing I need is to burden anyone with a relation to ME. NoodlesAtNight 9:06 pm {{When her made? Bird not recognize.}} SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:06 pm I have a brother. Probably other siblings, too, but he's the only one I've actually met. opatoes 9:06 pm Specs, would you like another brother? MedicalMurdersaurus 9:06 pm Uhhh dunno! Her Slash just *makes upward gestures* and there! Darkscream 9:06 pm *There are six Dinobots now? Well seven if Paddles counts.* Kelpy 9:06 pm [pats Smokey] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:07 pm I'd be your sister, Whirl, but I'm afraid I'm just too fuzzy for you. Me 9:07 pm ((... so let's say this "genetic memory" thing is real.)) opatoes 9:07 pm /Sigh, leaning against Swerve!/ ... What about you, Swerve? Kelpy 9:07 pm Yeah sure. opatoes 9:07 pm Wait, really? chronosmith 9:07 pm Fuzziness is no obstacle. I'm just not taking applications. Me 9:07 pm ((if it's a real thing, then that means that all this happened before aguilar passed on his genes to his descendant)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:07 pm ...I mean, I'd have to find my parents to do that. I could locate them, but I don't think anyone would enjoy that. Kelpy 9:07 pm I have no idea how it works but sure. Me 9:07 pm ((so, we can say, with 100% certainty, that aguilar will fuck AT LEAST one time in the future.)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:07 pm That's also an obstacle, yes. I'm happy to just be your friend, anyways. opatoes 9:07 pm Awesome! Wait, how old are you, Swerve? I'm your older brother, right? NoodlesAtNight 9:08 pm ((lmfao)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:08 pm ((the science checks out)) chronosmith 9:08 pm ((scientifically speaking, he WILL fuck)) Lord, this lady is insufferable. Someone PLEASE kill her. Please. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:08 pm ((how great would it be if they were getting ready for the big crazy fight that the whole story had been leading up to and he decided to have one last hurrah in a bar and then the memories just STOP cause he got someone knocked up?)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:08 pm I would, but I can't reach into the screen and murder her. Kelpy 9:08 pm Awhile SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:08 pm ((SWOOP PLEASE)) Me 9:08 pm ((LMAO)) ((NICE)) Kelpy 9:08 pm //god i did the math once but i forgot what it was that swerve's age was lmao Darkscream 9:09 pm She's probably going to die at the end of the movie. NoodlesAtNight 9:09 pm ((i would laugh my head off)) opatoes 9:09 pm ... Well, you wouldn't be older than me, right, Swerve? Darkscream 9:09 pm *Really doesn't care at all for this group. It is just a movie, so she's not attached at ALL.* opatoes 9:09 pm I'm not sure I'm younger brother material! NoodlesAtNight 9:09 pm ((she sounds like what's-his-holes with the whole "cold constructed bots are all horrible")) chronosmith 9:09 pm We can only hope. *grimly toasts Darkscream and takes another long draught of his Gaugebuster* Kelpy 9:09 pm Depends, I'm like. Hmmm. I forgot, but older than the war. Darkscream 9:10 pm [This makes me want the Prince of Persia movie. THAT WAS INTERESTING] Chaoit 9:10 pm -pokes at the new flier- I recognize you, from somewhere opatoes 9:10 pm ... I'm just a bit older than the war. Who was Prime when you first came online? Chaoit 9:10 pm -after he's seated nearby- NoodlesAtNight 9:10 pm ((and the plan to do the killswitch and all that)) chronosmith 9:10 pm ((Tyrest!)) Kelpy 9:10 pm It was the one before Sentinel. Me 9:10 pm ((GENETICALLY EEEEEEVIL)) Me 9:11 pm ((ur right, she'd get along with tyrest)) opatoes 9:11 pm ... That was Nova, right? So- So I guess you're older than me, basically. Darkscream 9:11 pm *Grins at Blaster.* Yeah, you should. We only met once and Sideswipe was ready to tear my helm off because I had you in the sky. chronosmith 9:11 pm ...*pauses, tilting his head curiously* Since we're on the subject, and all. *looks between Rumble and Frenzy* How do brothers WORK where you guys are from? MedicalMurdersaurus 9:11 pm *his optics are going to roll right out of his head* opatoes 9:11 pm That's just weird, though. I can still call myself your older brother, right? chronosmith 9:11 pm What makes you two twins, aside from the obvious? Chaoit 9:11 pm .......oh yeah He really hates fliers Kelpy 9:11 pm Nah, I think you're younger brother material. You're all... [gestures] Bouncy. NoodlesAtNight 9:11 pm //We tell ya, then you gotta tell us how's it work where you come from. Deal?// opatoes 9:11 pm Hey, what? Come on! I'm just an energetic older brother! Chaoit 9:12 pm Like...it's a switch, almost Darkscream 9:12 pm Does he pull Jet Judo on any flyer he goes against? Kelpy 9:12 pm You can be the taller brother if I can be the older. opatoes 9:12 pm I'm not even taller right now 😔 Chaoit 9:12 pm That'd be putting it nicely Kelpy 9:12 pm You're usually taller. Chaoit 9:13 pm During the war, if we didn't have a flier of our own, we'd send in Sides Me 9:13 pm ((look at him, demonstrating all that FREE WILL)) chronosmith 9:13 pm I've got no idea how it works HERE, either. Never thought to ask anyone. opatoes 9:13 pm True... Fine, I guess I'll be the taller brother. /Grumbling, doorwings flicking./ Kelpy 9:13 pm [pats] If he's been dead two hundred years, how is he here. chronosmith 9:13 pm Apparently Minimus Ambus--the dude in our Ultra Magnus suit, currently--had a spark-brother, but that's the full gamut of my expertise on the subject. NoodlesAtNight 9:13 pm [[His assassin-person has been dead two hundred years.]] opatoes 9:13 pm EAT IT Kelpy 9:14 pm Oh. Darkscream 9:14 pm Autobots back home didn't have flyers either until Swoop was created with the Dinobots. Then game the airealbots after that. Sideswipe and Sunstreaker were pure devils before that. NoodlesAtNight 9:14 pm //Well, y'find out, you tell us. We'll give ya the details anyhow.// MedicalMurdersaurus 9:14 pm *perks up when he hears his name* Hi! opatoes 9:14 pm /Leaning against Swerve./ Me 9:15 pm ((if they want to brainwash him into thinking he's doing the right thing by giving them the apple, why are they letting him hang out with all the people who know they're supposed to guard the apple and want to talk him out of handing it over?)) Chaoit 9:15 pm We had our own, but...they were taken out quickly, something about politics and stuff Darkscream 9:15 pm *Waves a servo.* Hi Swoop. I'd love to chat when you're not busy. *Smiles. She's more relaxed now than when she came in.* chronosmith 9:15 pm *salutes Rumble* You got my solid word. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:16 pm Me Swoop hang out with Her Bird. *points at Laserbeak so we're all on the same page* Me 9:16 pm ((why didn't they, just, put him on a different floor and go "oh, yeah, you're the last surviving ancestor of this assassin's club, all the other genetic lines of the other assassins died off over time because their descendants were violent malcontents.")) Chaoit 9:16 pm And Sides...I think he was taught by a flier. Because he doesn't just grab for the wings. He grounds them NoodlesAtNight 9:16 pm ((because Evil is Stupid i guess)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:17 pm ((what the fuck happened)) ((I wasn't paying enough attention)) Me 9:17 pm ((it's the musical episode)) Kelpy 9:17 pm //lmao SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:17 pm ((CLEARLY)) Darkscream 9:17 pm As I said, when you're not busy. I can always catch you after the movie? *Waves to Laserbeak so she wasn't left out then turns to Blaster.* Oh I know. I've seen it happen. I had it happen once to myself... Darkscream 9:19 pm *Clears her vocoder.* And I've crashed hard plenty of times before from stalling while trying to keep Sideswipe from crashing when we were on good terms. Taking jet surfing to new heights; literally. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:19 pm ...Torture chambers are bad places to kiss. Kelpy 9:19 pm //they are so bad at making things visile i honestly can't even see either of them lmao SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:19 pm ((I know right)) NoodlesAtNight 9:19 pm ((if you're on LD changing to HD helps a lot)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:19 pm ((that's why I just wasn't watching until they put him back into the animus)) Kelpy 9:19 pm //it is on ld unfortunately lmao Kelpy 9:19 pm //hd* Chaoit 9:19 pm Jet surfing? Kelpy 9:20 pm Seems like their primus is mean opatoes 9:20 pm man i wish i could see our past like this chronosmith 9:20 pm Thank god we CAN'T. Darkscream 9:20 pm Mhm. It's a bit of a willing jet judo. Keeping to my alternate form, Sideswipe kept his pedes positioned so he wouldn't slide off my winds, and we'd go flying. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:20 pm I don't think I would enjoy the experience of being burned alive. chronosmith 9:21 pm There's not a single day in my past I'd rather live than right here, right now. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:21 pm ((am I the only one having clone wars flashbacks?)) chronosmith 9:21 pm ...*pauses* That. Came out sounding a lot more optimistic than I intended. opatoes 9:21 pm Hey, I'll try anything once. Chaoit 9:21 pm Sounds dangerous SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:22 pm ((what is with red bird man)) NoodlesAtNight 9:22 pm //So, Frenzy 'n I, we got us kinda the same spark, sorta. Ain't stable enough for holdin' together - somethin' with the types of fields 'n speeds 'n scrap - so it busted up. Two parts, smaller ones. They was strong enough to hold up by themselves, so they got busy growin' both of us. Coupla changes on account of the splittin' - don't everythin' come out the same most times - but real close. Happens to all kindsa sparks, but most the time it makes minis like us. Anyhow, means he 'n I sorta got a weird bond without askin' for it. Ain't super telepathic like the Boss, 'n I can't do no talkin' to him, but we know stuff's happenin' 'bout each other. Feel it.// Darkscream 9:22 pm It can be if either party isn't careful. I've torn up my wings saving Sideswipe's skidplate. Forgot his jetpack to be looser and he fell. I couldn't reach him in time and... yeah... I transformed and hit the ground HARD. Tore up my back and wings pretty badly. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:23 pm ((did they just subtitle it... and "speaks spanish" it)) opatoes 9:23 pm .... So, basically at this institute, they're doing historical LARPing? chronosmith 9:23 pm *now turns his full attention to the explanation, Maximum Attentive Mode, antenna perked forward and everything* Chaoit 9:23 pm Yeesh Yeah, I'm not doing that SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:23 pm At least remove the restraints. NoodlesAtNight 9:23 pm //Same thing with the Birds. 'N Buzzsaw's sweetie 'n his bro - think they was supposed to be somethin' real strong. Sunstreaker's half spins way fast 'n burns super hot. Sideswipe don't.// Chaoit 9:23 pm -not looking at the screen, not looking at the screen- opatoes 9:24 pm I WANNA JUMP ON ROOFS Chaoit 9:24 pm -why the HEIGHTS!?- Darkscream 9:24 pm *Laughs.* I wouldn't ever ask you to. It really is dumb, but we did it anyway. *Sips at her Praxis Crash.* Chaoit 9:24 pm -he looked at the screen at a bad time- Darkscream 9:25 pm *Can block Blaster's view with a wing? They could move up and down to a point.* MedicalMurdersaurus 9:25 pm ((It seems to be implying he's going to knock this chick up but that doesn't make a ton of sense because then couldn't whatshisface in present day see this fight from both their POVs equally?)) Chaoit 9:25 pm -oh good- Me 9:25 pm ((not if they decided to only sync to one of them and chose him instead of her)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:25 pm ((the argument seems to be that they can hone in on which one it is via the Y chromosome)) Chaoit 9:26 pm Yeah, you remember how well me and heights got along chronosmith 9:26 pm Huh. *that's honestly kind of interesting; Whirl's still pretty glad he DOESN'T have a sibling, sharing a bond like that with someone sounds pretty terrible to him, but NOT having it would probably seem pretty lonely to the twins* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:26 pm ((hence why no ladies are in here)) opatoes 9:26 pm Swerve, how rebuilt is your Cybertron? Can I go over and hop on roofs? Me 9:26 pm ((there was at least one lady in the cafeteria.)) chronosmith 9:26 pm ((MITOCHONDRIAL DNA WOULD GIVE THEM SO MUCH MORE MILEAGE THO)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:26 pm ((I will accept the Y chromosome explanation)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:26 pm ((WHY IS THERE A HORSE ON THE ROOF)) NoodlesAtNight 9:26 pm ((yeah, the y explanation wouldn't work cuz there's lady assassins in game too)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:26 pm ((even if you are right that going maternally would be more useful)) Darkscream 9:26 pm Mhm. First hand experience. Least I now know if the case ever comes up. Kelpy 9:26 pm Uh, I mean it's mostly just Iacon right now though.... No, I don't think they'd let you. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:26 pm ((I KNOW O MIGHTY WORM)) ((but these are dumbasses)) SCProwl 9:26 pm ((i'll accept it if the next assassin is amab in the next game opatoes 9:27 pm Aww... I wonder if it would be wrong for me to jump on roofs around my Cybertron. chronosmith 9:27 pm ((...OR AT LEAST EQUAL MILEAGE)) opatoes 9:27 pm I mean, it can't be worse PR than dying and getting possessed by Unicron, right? Kelpy 9:27 pm Er. Darkscream 9:27 pm *Coughs on her drink hearing Smokescreen.* /What/ Chaoit 9:27 pm Yeah...still. Sorry about how Sides reacted Me 9:27 pm ((so yeah if these are BOTH his ancestors it's, like... real fucked up... if they keep going "oh yeah, he's this dude's descendant, this one dude, only the dude, check out this dude he's descended from" when literally she is rrrright there, in the same time period)) opatoes 9:27 pm ... That bot's okay now! SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:27 pm To be fair, dying and being possessed by an evil god is very bad PR. Chaoit 9:28 pm .......... Kelpy 9:28 pm //tbf i think it was said that he's the last one confirmed/known to have the apple and they are Speficially Searching for where he hid it MedicalMurdersaurus 9:28 pm ((I hate how they keep cutting away from the parkour to show us him on a CGI rig. It totally takes you out of what could be a cool practical stunt by showing clearly fake shit.)) Chaoit 9:28 pm -going to ignore that bit about Unicron- SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:28 pm ((I didn't mean "only male assassins ever" by the Y chromosome I mostly meant "this is why they're using a dude and not any of the female descendants")) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:29 pm Oh, that looks like brain damage. Kelpy 9:29 pm //p sure their reasoning is bc it was aguilar who had the appl laste, and not any specificdna reasons Me 9:29 pm ((but they DO have a female descendant in the cafeteria, i'm saying.)) NoodlesAtNight 9:29 pm [[...Interesting.]] opatoes 9:29 pm it looks like his model froze on an animation clip! Kelpy 9:29 pm Did he just die NoodlesAtNight 9:29 pm *So he's not the only one who suffers physically if he suffers in his head.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:29 pm ((wait, they do?)) ((I didn't see her)) Me 9:30 pm ((clearly they're not tracking by the y chromosome if they've got her there. unless she's trans or has a y chromosome, but somehow i doubt they thought it through that far)) Darkscream 9:30 pm *Bloody old gods. Looks back at Blaster.* Uh... Anyway. It's fine. Not going to be the first time or the last I'm sure. Sideswipe doesn't trust me. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:30 pm ((like I said I haven't been following real closely on the non assassin parts)) chronosmith 9:30 pm I dunno if that's how OURS work, but that seems like... the simplest way for it to happen. *he's not going to say so aloud, because it would be VERY CHEESY, and even though he's had plenty of liquor, he hasn't lost ALL of his decorum, but... he's glad the twins turned out the way they did. They're a lot more fun as two different people that he imagines they would be as a whole* Chaoit 9:30 pm Sideswipe's _paranoid_ to levels I'm worried about MedicalMurdersaurus 9:30 pm Her dumb MedicalMurdersaurus 9:31 pm Pain is fun : > Darkscream 9:31 pm How paranoid? Chaoit 9:32 pm He trained under Jazz NoodlesAtNight 9:32 pm *They wouldn't wanna be one person either. It's fun combining into an alt mode, and their split state probably makes that easier than it would be, but they like being different.* //Bet it ain't so different. You guys got hot spots, right? Maybe it's two sparks popped up real close together, or somethin'.// //Mixed stuff up.// *Mashes his fists together and makes a sort of "pchoom" noise.* Darkscream 9:33 pm Oh. Yeah. Training under the Spec Ops would lead to that, but it couldn't be all of Jazz's input to why Sideswipe is like that. chronosmith 9:33 pm Or one spark, and the sentio metallico sort of split it while it was forming. *matches Rumble's very informative gesture with one of his own, a big, massive pinch of his claw* Dunno if you can MAKE twins, though, the Cold Constructed way... I'd guess not? Chaoit 9:33 pm I...don't think I'm at liberty to tell the rest of his reasons Chaoit 9:34 pm But he's quick to react to even perceived threats chronosmith 9:34 pm Of COURSE she won't. Kelpy 9:34 pm [half listening] Branched spark twins are formed when the sentiuio splits itself between two sparks and bonds to both, instead of bonding to only one. I've never seen how a split spark forms. chronosmith 9:35 pm *perks up, looks to Swerve, and then gestures grandly* I'd trust the metallurgist on this one. Darkscream 9:35 pm *Leans back against the bar. Sips her drink.* Given he reacted the way he did to me, I'd venture a guess that Sideswipe had his home destroyed on a bombing run by a squad of Seekers... NoodlesAtNight 9:35 pm \\SO LIKE. ONE GLOB, TWO SPARKS?\\ Kelpy 9:35 pm Yeah, basically. So their bodies both experience the same thing. Sort of sharing a nervous system? Chaoit 9:35 pm ......... NoodlesAtNight 9:36 pm //Probably nicer 'n pinchin'.// *Whirl's idea looked kinda painful.* Darkscream 9:36 pm *Sighs.* I'd have a frag of a time getting to know him, wouldn't I? Assuming I could even get close. I'd just /scream/ threat because of my Seeker-state, huh? Kelpy 9:36 pm I've never seen the split spark form, so I can't say for sure, but I wouldn't be surprised if that was a result of unstable formation. Chaoit 9:37 pm Yeah....he'd....he'd not react well chronosmith 9:37 pm Probably. Pinching is generally pretty unpleasant. Darkscream 9:38 pm *Sips her drink in thought.* I'd have to look... less threatening, wouldn't I? Be an entirely different form. Even then it'd be a game of decepticon. Darkscream 9:39 pm [RIGHT] Chaoit 9:39 pm You'd have to work hard at that.... Kelpy 9:39 pm //exposiitiion Darkscream 9:39 pm [Primus is WTF at that apple Chaoit 9:40 pm The odds are really stacked against you, though NoodlesAtNight 9:40 pm [[...This facility must go through a great many employees.]] [[He hopes they offer good life insurance.]] Kelpy 9:40 pm //Everyone: apple is important, don't tell them how to find it! dude: i'm gonna give it to them so they kill my dad chronosmith 9:41 pm It's almost like re-connecting your unwilling prisoners to their ancient roots as highly-trained assassins is... *dramatic gasp* Backfiring. Darkscream 9:41 pm [welp, gee rabbit, you kicked me out SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:41 pm ((oi)) Chaoit 9:42 pm ((rabbit, you butt Darkscream 9:42 pm If it's changing my form that's the issue, Blaster, then it isn't that big of a problem. Chaoit 9:42 pm I don't think it'd be fair to you, though. NoodlesAtNight 9:42 pm \\NO, NEVER! SURELY NOT!\\ *Frenzy clutches his chest plates in mock shock and then doubles over laughing* Chaoit 9:42 pm And...he's not going to recover if he keeps this up NoodlesAtNight 9:42 pm \\COURSE IT'S BACKFIRIN'.\\ NoodlesAtNight 9:43 pm \\DUMB TEMPLE FRAGGERS.\\ SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:43 pm ((STOP "SPEAKING SPANISH" YOU ASSHOLE SUBTITLES)) Darkscream 9:43 pm Wouldn't be the first time I've looked different for interacting with others. Think I always look this way when I'm in another universe? chronosmith 9:43 pm I don't care what the official name of these guys is, from now on, they're "Temple Fraggers." Darkscream 9:43 pm [*SCREAMS IN SKELETON* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:43 pm Seconded. Temple Fraggers it is. Me 9:43 pm (("temple fraggers," the colloquial term for cityspeakers)) NoodlesAtNight 9:43 pm ((OMG)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:43 pm ((PUFF NO)) ((I'M EATING DON'T MAKE ME INHALE MY OWN FOOD)) NoodlesAtNight 9:43 pm [[...Such beautiful walls.]] chronosmith 9:44 pm ((HAHAHHA)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:44 pm ((Soooo how are we seeing this? No one related to anyone is in that room.)) Kelpy 9:44 pm Couldn't he give them a decoy apple NoodlesAtNight 9:45 pm ((they're peeking from above.)) chronosmith 9:45 pm ((PEEEPIN)) Chaoit 9:45 pm ((pfff MedicalMurdersaurus 9:45 pm ((ahhh. I can't keep straight who is where relative to each other.)) Me 9:45 pm ((who's doing that)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:45 pm ((the faces thing?)) Me 9:45 pm ((yes)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:46 pm ((I don't know)) Chaoit 9:46 pm ((please stop MedicalMurdersaurus 9:46 pm ((hell if I know)) Kelpy 9:46 pm //dfgg my pc doesn't like it SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:46 pm Ooooh, blood water. NoodlesAtNight 9:46 pm [[Let her perish. It is what is right.]] Kelpy 9:46 pm Stalemate NoodlesAtNight 9:46 pm [[She told you to let her die.]] chronosmith 9:46 pm She should kill herself first. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:47 pm She really ought to. NoodlesAtNight 9:47 pm [[Fool.]] Kelpy 9:47 pm He lost his leverage chronosmith 9:47 pm Honestly, how stupid. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:47 pm He... He stabbed her? Darkscream 9:47 pm *Sips. That was dumb.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:47 pm For... No reason? NoodlesAtNight 9:47 pm [[Why would he not? It removes a threat.]] opatoes 9:48 pm I zoned out what are they fighting for? NoodlesAtNight 9:48 pm [[He likely would have even if he received the apple.]] Chaoit 9:48 pm You change appearances in different timelines? chronosmith 9:48 pm It was the only thing keeping that guy at bay. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:48 pm Exactly. Darkscream 9:49 pm *Small sigh.* Takes some of the tension out when we know he survives because we're going "back in time" to view this happening. Me 9:49 pm ((remember: he still must fuck at least once)) Kelpy 9:49 pm Maybe a bit SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:49 pm ((he must fuck before he can die)) NoodlesAtNight 9:50 pm [[We do not know that he survives. They say he was the last to see it. They do not say for how long, or that he lived past that.]] chronosmith 9:50 pm Oh no. It's a tragedy... that character whose name I can't be arsed to remember is dead. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:50 pm Did they even ever name her? Darkscream 9:50 pm *Turns to Blaster.* I do. I might not be one of Amal' offspring, but I've got technology that far surpasses even our own that lets me change. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:50 pm ((seriously, did they name her?)) Chaoit 9:50 pm ....seriously? chronosmith 9:51 pm I legitimately could not tell you. Darkscream 9:51 pm *Nods.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:51 pm I cannot remember either. Kelpy 9:51 pm PLot twist this is where he dies. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:51 pm Ugh, look at that disgusting little man. Chaoit 9:51 pm That's...kinda amazing NoodlesAtNight 9:51 pm ((maria.)) Me 9:51 pm ((I BELIEVE I CAN FLY)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:51 pm ((uh no)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:51 pm ((THEY BROKE THE ARM)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:51 pm (( LOL)) Darkscream 9:52 pm *Laughs.* It is, isn't it? MedicalMurdersaurus 9:52 pm ((he jumped SO HARD in the past that he broke a machine IN THE FUTURE)) Chaoit 9:52 pm Like, what can it do? Kelpy 9:52 pm Are they reading his mind while he's in the memory then Darkscream 9:53 pm It's quite the all-in-one. I can travel through the slips between universes, change my appearance as a Cybertronian, and even take on the form of more organic races such as humans. I still have a solid-light holoform though for when I'm in this form. Kelpy 9:54 pm //and what's that in english MedicalMurdersaurus 9:54 pm ((OMFG)) Darkscream 9:54 pm [pffff eff that guy] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:55 pm ((I don't know shit)) Me 9:55 pm ((if they can do all this--look up the date in the DNA, sync it to his mind, read his mind while he's synced to his ancestor's DNA save file--why can't they just... read the save file. wouldn't that be a lot easier than getting a living dude to play through it.)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:55 pm ((seriously)) Chaoit 9:55 pm That's....wow. That's a lot of things it can do. opatoes 9:55 pm ((they just enjoy LARPing)) chronosmith 9:55 pm *perks up* Why couldn't we get a movie about this guy? He's got so much more charisma. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:55 pm I know, right? NoodlesAtNight 9:55 pm ((there was some reason or other i heard once for not being able to do the direct reading but i forget it)) Darkscream 9:56 pm Mhm. It was created by a Genome, whom really was the definition of a "mad" scientist. Chaoit 9:56 pm A what? opatoes 9:56 pm I wish I had genes. My legs get really cold sometimes! SCProwl 9:56 pm ((I'm fairly certain they explain they get most of the data as it's re-experienced. unless it's something like in historical records or whatever, so they can't just read the save file as it were ((in the games anyway, the movie skips some explanations obviously Kelpy 9:56 pm //will we ever know whqt he said in arabic and what they're chanting Darkscream 9:57 pm A Genome. Think of a blonde human with a monkey tail, but he's not human SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:57 pm ((will the rest of this movie involve the historical assassin larp I care about is the queeeeeeeee oh wow fuck it up dude)) chronosmith 9:57 pm ((EEEEY)) ((bless u for that ref darskscream. Best one i n the series)) Kelpy 9:57 pm //i laughed chronosmith 9:57 pm ((... darskscream.)) Darkscream 9:57 pm [😀 ? Darkscream 9:58 pm [Me talking about Genomes, eh? Kelpy 9:58 pm //the ff9 ref chronosmith 9:58 pm ((yes |3c)) Kelpy 9:58 pm //my first ffffff Chaoit 9:58 pm ....huh chronosmith 9:58 pm So does... that mean they're related, or...? Kelpy 9:58 pm //i also then spent a decade looking for a copy after my dad sold his copy when i was like 12 ghnghvn Chaoit 9:58 pm Sounds....silly Darkscream 9:59 pm [I am a neeeeeerd who loves their references and hybrids of gaming. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:59 pm ((Who would have thought that letting a bunch of people with nothing to lose relive their badass assassin ancestor's life experiences would end poorly for you?)) opatoes 10:00 pm ... I wish I had cool ancestors. Darkscream 10:00 pm Sounds silly, but he's extremely smart. Liked to think if you caught his tail he'd pass out. It was honestly cute. spent a lot of his time in a mushroom. MedicalMurdersaurus 10:00 pm What "ancestor" mean? chronosmith 10:00 pm It's a biological thing. opatoes 10:00 pm The bots that raised the bots that raised you! And so on Kelpy 10:00 pm Does he need to be shirtless Chaoit 10:00 pm Huh opatoes 10:01 pm Yes SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:01 pm ((fuck em up lady)) chronosmith 10:01 pm That was the most hilarious *air quote claws* "Security Guard" rush I've ever seen. opatoes 10:01 pm If he didn't, he'd die from heat stroke or something, I think? Me 10:01 pm ((i kind of feel like "nothing is true and everything is permitted" is more the kind of philosophy that leads to redpill MRAs than to badass diverse assassins that challenge the church and protect free will.)) MedicalMurdersaurus 10:01 pm ((to be fair, taking off clothes in a sword fight back in the day was a good way to avoid getting fibers in a stab wound and dying of infection)) Chaoit 10:01 pm Well, I don't doubt the smart part, considering what he made for you NoodlesAtNight 10:01 pm ((if i am glad for One Thing about this movie it is that we get at least a decent variety of people being the assassins in modern day)) Darkscream 10:01 pm I came from a very strange place. John was one of the more normal things. I had Tyrannids running around, Zerg causing havoc, Orks being badass, and even some Protoss. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:01 pm *the dragon perks up* I know a protoss. NoodlesAtNight 10:01 pm ((however briefly)) Me 10:01 pm ((yes, i was very pleased to see that)) Chaoit 10:02 pm ....come again? chronosmith 10:02 pm ((Yeah! And subtle note, I like that there are male and female security guards who are treated equally as threats)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:02 pm Protoss. Plant creatures. He's called Byandar. Darkscream 10:02 pm M'not sure we're thinking of the same Protoss? Kelpy 10:02 pm How great would it be if all that suspense and drama and the Columbus thing was a fake out and the apple isn't there at all. chronosmith 10:02 pm Too clever for this snorefest. Darkscream 10:02 pm I lived in a very chaotic world, Blaster. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:03 pm Two, three meters tall? Come in Khalai, Nerazim, and Tal'darim varieties? Bipedal, digitigrade? Chaoit 10:03 pm I can tell Darkscream 10:03 pm Psykers. NoodlesAtNight 10:03 pm ((also re: the philosophy - it may sound like that but you _do_ get a lot of protecting people from that kind of asshole in during the games)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:03 pm Yes, that too. The "no mouths" thing does tip one off. Darkscream 10:03 pm *Whistful sigh.* I miss the Protoss. I don't miss the Nekrons... [I am mixing my games on purpose.] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:04 pm Byandar seems nice enough. Painfully shy, of course. Me 10:04 pm (("my ancestor pretended to give the apple to chistopher columbus because he knew that 600 years in the future there would be strange metal contraptions powered by electircity and witchcraft that would let them look through my ancestor's eyes to see this moment.")) Darkscream 10:04 pm Though I still have a few bottles of Slaneesh wine. Me 10:04 pm ((no no, i'm sure that they actually do protect the poor and downtrodden in the game.)) Chaoit 10:04 pm ??? Me 10:04 pm ((that just seems like the wrong philosophy for people who protect the poor and downtrodden.)) NoodlesAtNight 10:04 pm ((fair)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:04 pm Anyone who would get thrown through a wormhole and then refuse to return due to social anxiety probably has some issues, though. Darkscream 10:04 pm Wish I could meet Byandar. It's been so long since I've even seen a Protoss. chronosmith 10:05 pm (("my ancestor pretended to give the apple to christopher columbus cos chris was a massive tool even then and it was a hilarious prank)) Chaoit 10:05 pm Annnnnd you've lost me SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:05 pm ((WELL GOOD NEWS BYANBYAN IS MY OC AND U CAN MEET HIM FOR 3 POTATO)) Darkscream 10:05 pm *Grins at Blaster* Sorry. Slaneesh is a God of Chaos. One of many SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:05 pm I'll have to send you his comm frequency. He could use the conversation. Darkscream 10:05 pm [*MAKES MASHED POTOATOS* GIMME Kelpy 10:06 pm IS she having all second thoughts and regrets now. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:06 pm (( protoss-menagerie.tumblr.com , or specs6262 on discord)) Kelpy 10:06 pm Because she's still a crappy villain Darkscream 10:06 pm [follow the bbe chronosmith 10:06 pm Yeah. She's like "oh nooo, I did all these horrible things that they're twisting to take away peoples' free will!" When she's been DOING that this whole damn movie. Chaoit 10:07 pm The only God of Chaos I've talked too was drunk off his aft MedicalMurdersaurus 10:07 pm ((she is not cool enuogh for that quote)) Darkscream 10:07 pm Yeah they're not /our/ gods... Kelpy 10:07 pm Didn't she like. KNow fro the START this was the plan Darkscream 10:07 pm You'd be more afraid of them than you would of Unicron. chronosmith 10:07 pm ((if we're talking about a speech about free will I can think of a line OFF THE TOP OF MY HAND that is better than that)) ((...head)) Chaoit 10:08 pm ....wonderful Just what I needed to hear Darkscream 10:08 pm Though some are just so sweet if you can stand them. Not many though. chronosmith 10:08 pm ((any one of the "falls the shadow" refrains from TS Elliot's The Hollow Men)) Darkscream 10:08 pm You don't want to meet Tzeentch unless you want to go crazy or smack him in the faces. Darkscream 10:09 pm [hnn I need to catch up on the Emperor MedicalMurdersaurus 10:09 pm ((SO I have a question. I don't know if the games answer this but, in this movie, the Apple has a complete genetic roadmap for humanity in it. Okay. I'll buy that. So why did anyone hundreds of years ago care? Even if they were super smart enough to understand genes somehow, that wouldn't be ACTIONABLE knowledge. It'd just be a fun fact.)) chronosmith 10:09 pm *exaggerated gagging noises* Chaoit 10:09 pm ..... yeah, you're not helping with that Kelpy 10:10 pm God don't romance them they'd be terrible together NoodlesAtNight 10:10 pm ((in game the apples do way, way more)) Darkscream 10:10 pm *Laughs* Just be glad you're not anywhere near Warhammer. NoodlesAtNight 10:10 pm ((from wiki: "The Apples were designed to be able to project images, conjure realistic illusions, and even turn thought into reality; hence, they were used by many great rulers throughout history, proving the efficacy of their powers")) opatoes 10:10 pm just snag it from him and eat it NoodlesAtNight 10:11 pm ((this movie is like... a gross simplification of the whole all the explanations)) Darkscream 10:11 pm How sharp was that dagger... Me 10:11 pm ((why don't the assassins, like... smash the apple)) Chaoit 10:11 pm I am chronosmith 10:11 pm Damn right you did, idiot. Kelpy 10:12 pm Don't take credit for someone else's work You're not even cool enough to do it Chaoit 10:12 pm That place sounds terrifying NoodlesAtNight 10:12 pm ((and also uhhhh where is it. "Apples also contained knowledge of technologies used by the Isu. Like many other Pieces, they were able to "communicate" with people, showing them the schematics necessary to make the technology and transferring knowledge about the manufacturing of the shown devices.[9] A good example of this was Leonardo da Vinci, who studied one of the Apples and invented four war machines, and several other weapons of technology far beyond his own time.")) ((why they didn't smash them is beyond me)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:12 pm Smokescreen, I think the Apple is metal. Human teeth do not eat metal. chronosmith 10:12 pm Man. this movie is so bad I can't even get into her revenge subplot. Primus. Kelpy 10:12 pm So. She let him go knowing he'd likely kill her dad, now she wants revenge? Darkscream 10:12 pm *Finishes off her drink that she's been nursing all night. A good drink was best savored.* Kelpy 10:12 pm What happened to that sudden spate of regret SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:13 pm I can't even remember her name, either. opatoes 10:13 pm Well, they could learn to eat metal! SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:13 pm ... opatoes 10:13 pm Isn't that how they get their genetic traits in this movie? Darkscream 10:13 pm And we'll never get another movie in this line because it was /boring/. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:13 pm Smokescreen please never have organic teeth. opatoes 10:13 pm I really hope I never do! Chaoit 10:13 pm Is it over? opatoes 10:13 pm I don't want my teeth to fall out Darkscream 10:13 pm Almost it seems. Dragging it out. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:13 pm I hope it's over. Chaoit 10:14 pm Sheeesh chronosmith 10:14 pm It was also ugly. Like, it felt like a chore for my damn eye. opatoes 10:14 pm 15 minutes of credits? SOUNDWAVE SOUNDWAVE JUPITER ASCENDING MedicalMurdersaurus 10:14 pm *YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWNNNSSS* chronosmith 10:14 pm ((SMOKEY NOOOOo)) Darkscream 10:14 pm [BEE] chronosmith 10:14 pm ((you're going to kill us)) Me 10:14 pm ((LORD i've never seen jupiter ascending but i kinda wanna)) ((HEY HEY BEE TRAILER BEE TRAILER)) opatoes 10:14 pm ((honestly i had a lot of fun watching it! opatoes 10:15 pm ((it's a visually nice movie i will say! Me 10:15 pm ((good action sequences)) opatoes 10:15 pm ((bees Darkscream 10:15 pm [pffft NoodlesAtNight 10:15 pm ((time marker: 10:35.)) chronosmith 10:15 pm ((I went in with lowered expectations and all it did was frustrate me at every turn. A few good ideas scattered in a mess of a movie)) Chaoit 10:15 pm ..... chronosmith 10:15 pm ((the reptile alien was cool tho)) opatoes 10:16 pm Oh! I have some useless inventions chronosmith 10:16 pm *peers* MedicalMurdersaurus 10:16 pm Bird. Me Swoop sleeeeeepy. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:16 pm *the dragon stretches out* I should head on back. Goodnight, Soundwave, Ravage, Whirl, everyone! NoodlesAtNight 10:16 pm [[Goodnight.]] chronosmith 10:16 pm Seeya, dragon. Darkscream 10:16 pm Human stupidity never ceases to amaze me. [specs, the bebbeh Chaoit 10:16 pm What...the.... MedicalMurdersaurus 10:17 pm *blink blinks slowly* opatoes 10:17 pm ... Soundwave, do you know any buts who could hug me? I really don't feel good shrinking and growing all the time, and I want to be back to normal. Kelpy 10:17 pm //i dunno, butterone could be useful for disabled people with hand problems from nerve damage or something Kelpy 10:17 pm //specifically, those unable to use knivves chronosmith 10:17 pm agreed)) Darkscream 10:17 pm [I had a pet rock Me 10:17 pm ((USB pet rock is the most hilarious thing I've ever seen)) chronosmith 10:17 pm ((ALSO AGREED)) NoodlesAtNight 10:18 pm [[...Tarantulas has many arms?]] *He doesn't know who does hugs. He doesn't do hugs.* chronosmith 10:18 pm ((how dare you this is an AMAZING INVENTION)) MedicalMurdersaurus 10:18 pm *streeeeeeeeeeetches his arms and wings* chronosmith 10:18 pm ...well, Ravage. opatoes 10:18 pm True! True, I'll have to ask him. He gives really, really good hugs, too. NoodlesAtNight 10:18 pm =Do and die.= chronosmith 10:18 pm When are you going to get a fabulous do? Darkscream 10:18 pm *Laughs.* NoodlesAtNight 10:18 pm *Rumble points at the baby mop.* //I wanna do that.// chronosmith 10:19 pm Pfft, I'M not going to do anything. I know nothing about fashion. I mean, seriously. *gestures to all of him* Does this look like a mech who knows FASHION? NoodlesAtNight 10:19 pm //Looks fun as frag. Wigglin' across the floor to clean it.// Chaoit 10:19 pm Anyway chronosmith 10:19 pm PFFT. Well. I mean. *snickers* One way to get Dancitron clean. Oh, oh, get this one, Ravage! Kelpy 10:19 pm I mean, doesn't look that bad??? a personal tv would be cool NoodlesAtNight 10:19 pm [[You look fashionable to him.]] Darkscream 10:19 pm M'yes, Blaster? opatoes 10:19 pm ... Give me the hat wig chronosmith 10:20 pm I question your judgment, in that case, Soundwave. But thanks. Chaoit 10:20 pm So, the thing can do quite a few things Darkscream 10:20 pm Aye? MedicalMurdersaurus 10:20 pm *slumps forward until he's folded over like he's melting mid-yoga pose* chronosmith 10:20 pm (dbnesjf THE ARMLESS ONE)) opatoes 10:20 pm .... I want one Darkscream 10:21 pm *Shrieks in laughter suddenly.* Me 10:21 pm ((okay the velcro remote control headband is the most hilarious-looking thing i've ever seen)) NoodlesAtNight 10:21 pm ((this one beats it)) chronosmith 10:21 pm *outright laughing* Chaoit 10:22 pm So, you said it allows you to change into quite a few things? Darkscream 10:22 pm *Trying to stop laughing first to talk.* Many things. NoodlesAtNight 10:23 pm *BANANAS.* Kelpy 10:23 pm //bana slicer is actually a disability tool NoodlesAtNight 10:23 pm [[...This looks useful.]] chronosmith 10:23 pm ((SOUNDWAVE'S WEAPON OF CHOICE)) Me 10:23 pm ((A WEAPON TO USE AGAINST YOUR ENEMIES SOUNDWAVE)) ((oh the zigzag one is cute)) NoodlesAtNight 10:23 pm ((i honestly like things that slice things for me)) Chaoit 10:23 pm ......... Kelpy 10:23 pm //like it's legit created and marketed for those with disabilityes involing their hands Me 10:24 pm ((i believe it. it looks like an actual disability aid)) NoodlesAtNight 10:24 pm ((that's good!! and very very useful)) ((chopping things is nervewracking when you've got shaky hands, at the very least)) Chaoit 10:24 pm How often have you needed to use it, though? chronosmith 10:24 pm ((yeah, a lot of "useless" infomercial stuff is specifically designed as tools for folks with disabilities!)) Kelpy 10:24 pm //i read an article earlier and they quoted the company who makes it and yeah, it's a legitmiately marked disability aid for those who've had strokes, or the elderly with shaking hands. the sock puller upper is ALSO a disability tool chronosmith 10:24 pm Spin the bottle? MedicalMurdersaurus 10:25 pm *starts breathign deeply* NoodlesAtNight 10:25 pm ((i have never seen these videos so i apologize if more disability aids get into them, i am mostly curious about stuff like this electric spin the bottle rubbish)) MedicalMurdersaurus 10:25 pm *is now a one dino-pile* Darkscream 10:25 pm More often than you'd think. I've traveled quite often through the multiverse... and I think Swoop passed out. chronosmith 10:25 pm ((You're good neddles! I know you'd give a much more tasteful commentary if it was you <3 )) Kelpy 10:25 pm //lmao i've never seen them either but yeah a lot of the useless invention videos include them bc people don't realize that's what they are Kelpy 10:25 pm //alsio i would absolutely like a portable microwave MedicalMurdersaurus 10:26 pm *is passed out* Kelpy 10:26 pm Is Swoop okay Darkscream 10:26 pm *Finds Swoop sleeping absolutely adorable.* Chaoit 10:26 pm Um... He's out NoodlesAtNight 10:26 pm ((oh my god)) Kelpy 10:26 pm //dfbfgb opatoes 10:26 pm that. that bot is going to start a revolution Darkscream 10:27 pm [hey look chronosmith 10:27 pm *looks at his feet* I've never tried socks. Obviously. I don't think it'd work out. opatoes 10:27 pm Socks are pretty cozy! They don't work well for us, though. Me 10:27 pm ((eyyy, speaking of actual disability aids. there was a post about a version of this on tumblr a while ago)) NoodlesAtNight 10:27 pm ((oh?)) Me 10:27 pm ((OH MY GOD)) Kelpy 10:27 pm //yeah that's the article i learned the banana slicer was a disability aid opatoes 10:28 pm ..... can I put this on me Me 10:28 pm ((the abhancer)) MedicalMurdersaurus 10:28 pm *is going to keep on zzzzing until he is done napping or until Bird wants him to zzzz somewhere else* chronosmith 10:28 pm ((amazin)) Darkscream 10:28 pm Soundwave, is Swoop alright sleeping like that? NoodlesAtNight 10:28 pm [[We'll move him in seven minutes.]] Me 10:28 pm ((oh yeah this one definitely is too)) Kelpy 10:29 pm //yeah lmao. Chaoit 10:29 pm ((yup Darkscream 10:29 pm [cleaning that though has to be a bit iffy opatoes 10:29 pm ((yeahhh like... so many of these products for "lazy" people are just... Kelpy 10:29 pm //gotta wonder if anyone's ever been told after posting one of these videos that all their lazy video items are actually disability aids NoodlesAtNight 10:29 pm ((.....i'm sorta looking at this going "want this, want that, want this")) Kelpy 10:29 pm //same?? NoodlesAtNight 10:30 pm ((let's just enjoy the products)) chronosmith 10:30 pm ((o7)) Kelpy 10:30 pm //frankly i'd like an auto cat scooper lmao Darkscream 10:30 pm [Cat is kind of BAD for your health, so, this is a good thing [....AND THENTHIS MedicalMurdersaurus 10:30 pm ((We used to have an electric literbox. Let me tell you what, that thing was FAR more work than just a normal one.)) Kelpy 10:30 pm //unsurprising Me 10:30 pm ((... did the sound go out or did my headphones, like, spontaneously stop working?)) Kelpy 10:31 pm //we turned off sound lmao chronosmith 10:31 pm ((Neddles muted the annoying announcer)) NoodlesAtNight 10:31 pm ((i muted it cause i was tired of him calling them all lazy)) Me 10:31 pm ((oh okay good)) ((might wanna turn the caps off too)) chronosmith 10:31 pm ((i have one image for u neddles))

NoodlesAtNight 10:31 pm ((WHAT IN GOD'S NAME)) chronosmith 10:31 pm ((i owe you my life)) Darkscream 10:32 pm [WAT Chaoit 10:32 pm ((YIKES NoodlesAtNight 10:32 pm ((AUTOMATIC SCISSORS!!!)) ((yes please)) chronosmith 10:32 pm Borg hammock(( Darkscream 10:32 pm [Good for long cloth I'd bet, but not shorter work Me 10:32 pm ((hahaha the bike burger holder)) Me 10:33 pm ((im digging it)) Chaoit 10:33 pm Humans are weird Me 10:33 pm ((graze at your burger like a horse with a feed sack)) Darkscream 10:33 pm [I'm hungry now. I should of eaten earlier cause I need to take my pill opatoes 10:33 pm ((i remember this one video series i saw a bit of that looked at some of those from tv things and tried them out and suggested similar enough alternatives? that was fairly interesting ngl MedicalMurdersaurus 10:33 pm ((Okay. I'm going to go to bed. Feel free to physically move Swoop around or just leave him be. Honestly, y'all just have fun with him ragdolling around XD)) NoodlesAtNight 10:33 pm ((rest well!)) Chaoit 10:33 pm ((that's asking for it to spring itself into someone Darkscream 10:33 pm [Nini! opatoes 10:34 pm ((nini!! Darkscream 10:34 pm [COOKIE chronosmith 10:34 pm *streeetches* All right, I'm out. Seeya, losers. *bobs his head to the room in general* You too, Rumble. *additional bob, and then a moment where he gives an exaggerated "hmmm" face. it's very convincing* And you, too, Frenzy. opatoes 10:34 pm coooooookie NoodlesAtNight 10:34 pm *Soundwave stretches.* [[All right. He should close down for the night.]] Me 10:34 pm ((*grabs swoop by the butt and shakes him to watch all his limbs flail*)) opatoes 10:34 pm Awww. Do you need any help finishing off drinks for the night? Me 10:34 pm ((that's the only way to play with ragdolls)) NoodlesAtNight 10:34 pm //Seeya, Whirl. I'll head with ya next time?// \\OOH OOH, ME TOO.\\ Kelpy 10:34 pm Welp, I should definitely get back. Oh! Did you remember to pick up your octopus? Chaoit 10:34 pm Yeah. I should be heading back home too chronosmith 10:34 pm Sure thing! *salutes* You two're always welcome. Darkscream 10:35 pm *Gets up and rolls her shoulders.* Was nice to see you again, Blaster. NoodlesAtNight 10:35 pm [[He will pick the octopus up shortly.]] Kelpy 10:35 pm Alright. I'll go get it ready to go then. Night! opatoes 10:35 pm ... Actually- wait, did I ever give you that octopus I got, Soundwave? Chaoit 10:35 pm Nice to see you in a less dangerous situation NoodlesAtNight 10:35 pm [[You did not.]] *...Is he about to get TWO?* Chaoit 10:35 pm Good night! opatoes 10:35 pm ... Do you want to come by later and maybe get the covenant and read the octopus? I mean. NoodlesAtNight 10:35 pm [[Goodnight, those of you leaving. Blaster.]] Darkscream 10:35 pm Night Blaster. Get home safe. *Wings twitch.* Octopuses? opatoes 10:35 pm I need to rest, but you know what I mean. NoodlesAtNight 10:36 pm [[That sounds fine.]] Me 10:36 pm ((READ THE OCTOPUS, SOUNDWAVE)) Chaoit 10:36 pm -waves and is soon gone- Me 10:36 pm ((TELL US WHAT IT THINKS)) NoodlesAtNight 10:36 pm *HE'S GONNA* chronosmith 10:36 pm ((DISCOVER ITS SECRETS)) opatoes 10:36 pm ((DON'T GET THE COVENANT THOUGH!! NO STEALING!! NoodlesAtNight 10:36 pm [[Yes. Octopuses made their way into the multiverse mechs' hands. He is going to find a home for them.]] *Here. The home is here.* ((TOO LATE YOU SAID HE COULD)) opatoes 10:36 pm ((smokescreen will cry that's like. the closest remaining connection he has to some of his mentors NoodlesAtNight 10:37 pm ((fine fine he'll be good)) opatoes 10:37 pm ((also he'll tell megatron Darkscream 10:37 pm *Makes a little trill-like sound.* Really now? I guess the grays have been active handing out the little guys. NoodlesAtNight 10:38 pm [[These things go around. It was protoforms, last time.]] [[But, he must close. Tanks won't set themselves up.]] Darkscream 10:38 pm *Looks at Swoop passed out then back over.* Need any help? opatoes 10:38 pm ... Can I help set up the tanks? What kind of things do you do for these long-term tanks? NoodlesAtNight 10:39 pm [[No, no. The twins can carry him. He's only going to Laserbeak's quarters anyway. She will keep an eye on him until he wakes.]] [[And he would prefer to set the tanks up himself, but thank you.]] *Doesn't want anyone to see That Room Upstairs.* opatoes 10:39 pm Fair enough! Night, Soundwave. See you later. NoodlesAtNight 10:39 pm *They'll question why there's a whole Earth style habitat up there.* NoodlesAtNight 10:40 pm [[Goodnight.]] opatoes 10:40 pm /Hey Smokescreen's got no room to judge, he's got a greenhouse!/ Darkscream 10:40 pm Ah, Laserbeak. I didn't want to assume if it was her or Buzzsaw. NoodlesAtNight 10:40 pm [[It is her. Buzzsaw is... reclusive.]] Darkscream 10:41 pm That's a shame. *Shakes her helm.* I miss the minicons from my world. It's nice to see they're alive and well here though. NoodlesAtNight 10:42 pm [[Quite. 327 in just this area.]] Darkscream 10:42 pm *Wings perk up.* Really? NoodlesAtNight 10:42 pm [[Yes. We are quite a happy settlement.]] NoodlesAtNight 10:43 pm [[But, again. It is past hours. If you require a place to stay, he offers to connect you to a mech in New Praxus or New Kaon, as you prefer.]] Darkscream 10:44 pm Ah, right. Sorry, Soundwave. I'll be fine finding someplace in the outdoors if I'm not intruding on some territory. Might go check out the Rust Sea before settling in for the night. NoodlesAtNight 10:45 pm [[As you wish. Be careful. He does not want police at his door asking about your remnants.]] *He only wants police at his door if they're there for very different things.* Darkscream 10:46 pm Thanks for the warning, but I'll be fine. If an army of Nekrons can't kill me.. Oh. Before I go... NoodlesAtNight 10:46 pm [[Yes?]] Darkscream 10:48 pm *Goes into subspace for something.* Where did I... *Her arm goes nearly all the way in as the grumbles about pockets. Grins and pulls out a plastic box.* If you're going to get some octopuses soon, you'll want these. If they're the big variety, this is vacuum packed shark. Little ones. I run into a lot of species out there. NoodlesAtNight 10:49 pm *Soundwave takes the box with a feeler and gives it a suspicious glance before setting it onto a couch nearby. If it's going to blow up before he can scan it, better the couch than him.* [[Thank you.]] Darkscream 10:50 pm *Not going to blow up. Understands the caution.* Hope I get to visit again. Thanks for the drink, Ravage! *Waves and heads out the door.* NoodlesAtNight 10:51 pm *Nods after her and motions for the twins to take Swoop upstairs. He'll be along in a moment, himself. Work to do!*

[donnerpartyofone]

So I’m going to assume that this all is from the same irritatingly coy Cigarette Smoking Anon who, mostly during the election, would send me copied and pasted mid-stream chunks of Wiki Leaks or conspiracy-obsessed far right op eds from unknown sources (often about people like Clinton who I’d never even mentioned), as if this would spontaneously obliterate my naive little grip on reality, and I’d have to faint into the arms of Alex Jones or somebody for reprogramming. I have so many questions about this. And I mean, we can even skip the questions about why, if people like anon believe that all “non-western” men are clit-chopping baby-raping nightmare people, they don’t seem to give shit #1 about legal aid or shelter or health care for these women and children to whom they’re supposedly so sympathetic from refugee countries of origin. My questions are mainly about why trolling randos on social media is a better, or any kind of good use of anon’s valuable time and superior intellect.

What is supposed to happen when a person performs this kind of trolling? My most reasonable assumption is that I’m expected to work myself into a liberal frenzy where I pompously hurl invective at the invisible xenophobe who nervily tramples the rose garden of my utopian world view, until I exhaust myself, thusly making myself out to be a big stupid asshole with no self-control or real confidence in my beliefs. If that’s definitely the intention, I have a lot of questions about THAT too–mainly, what’s the point of it? Bear with me, if you feel like it.

Taking the anon’s perspective: If I thought that I knew for a fact that every human being from outside of the US and Western Europe posed a violent threat to everyone else, my priority action would probably NOT be to go around starting flame wars with random private internet citizens whose defeat would make not the slightest ripple in the universe. I would probably see the most important thing, well, other than full participation in my government and organized demonstrations for what I believe to be right–after that, I would probably see the most important thing as helping to eliminate dangerous ignorance through effective and direly needed education.

Let’s be specific: I use the word “education” to mean the spread of verifiable historical fact, and strategies for interpreting it critically. I do not mean, shouting at strangers like a lunatic with a doomsday sandwich board, vacilating between hyperbolic insults and paranoid grumbling about vast coverups.

(Like, whoever sent me, with zero context, that random sound bite about how the minimal Swedish news coverage of a violent rape attempt represents a vast conspiracy to protect refugees, is like…who in their right mind could even begin to believe that the dark inner workings of government or mass media, which are notoriously swayed only by power and money, actually serve to protect disenfranchised asylum-seekers from wartorn countries? I mean we would just live in a really different world if that were the priority of people powerful enough to orchestrate a “coverup”…)

This is behavior that seems HILARIOUSLY unlikely to change the perspectives or political behavior of random passersby, right? In fact, the more likely result is that the audience thinks, “Wow, I hate this guy. He’s calling me a piece of shit and he talks like a fucking crazy person. When I hear opposition to my ideals come out of this guy’s mouth in this maniacal way, it makes me feel even more assured of my preexisting beliefs than ever, and it makes me even less likely than ever to listen to anybody spouting the same type of bullshit.” But, for whatever reason, this seems to be a very popular method for far right bigots to surface their ideas. Surely there is some way in which this behavior contributes to the strength of their party and the success of what they see as justice, or why would they do it? I guess I’m just too stupid and shortsighted to derive from this anything other than a bunch of disorganized, childish raving that increases the confidence and political activity of their enemies, if not the sheer NUMBER of their enemies. Fun fact: my #1 inspiration for reblogging that antifa master post of thoroughly cited data regarding refugees in Sweden, was conspiracy anon sending me speculative fiction about how migrant crimes are hidden by a coverup. Good job anon, what an effective way to create change

But about my intellectual deficiency and my tragically limited perspective…what is supposed to be the value of harassing me? I mean me personally: Someone with a tiny little Tumblr that has a higher number of asks than followers, someone whose public political activity is (as far as Tumblr has any idea) limited to reblogging petitions in support of Chelsea Manning or Standing Rock, none of which remotely makes me an “influencer” of any kind. Maybe Alt Right Deep Throat Anon thinks this is grassroots campaigning, maybe they think that every big change has to begin with one small step, and that in the long run, people like them sending nasty insults and citation-free “news” to people like me represents a means of positive transformation into a better world for everyone.

I mean, the alternative is that anons like this are actually chronically frightened bigots who are easily led by anyone who attempts to justify their amorphous fear of brown people with foreign accents, thus relieving them of the scary responsibility to learn about and take action toward the protection of anyone other than the rich white scumbags who they droolingly invite to dominate them. Or maybe anon doesn’t even believe anything they’re saying and this is all a big joke–I mean, they don’t have the conviction or courage to attach their actual identity to any of these ideas, so I have tacit permission to just assume that none of this is “real” and there’s no reason for me to spend a single moment thinking about what “they” are trying to say to me, since they’ve unburdened themselves of any subjective individuality. But, as these mean anonymous messages suggest, I’m just a pinko liberal white feminist idiot who thinks everyone should hold hands and sing Kumbaya, so I’m only capable of assuming that anon is just and sincere, and their potent wisdom about how to change people’s minds is just lost on a tiny little dinosaur brain like mine. Sorry, try next door.

TL, DR: Anon’s methods of educating and debating are garbage, they undermine whatever point they’re trying to make if there even is one, and they will never have the slightest effect on anyone other than the choir to which they already belong.

Meanwhile, if you’ve actually read this far and you know anything about identifying and/or blocking anons, hit me up! I really don’t want to turn off anon, or alienate other anons, because I enjoy them. Even the unfunny performance artist anons and the sexually frustrated anons who need me to know that they think I’m ugly–yes, even you are valid (insofar as you are grist for my comedy mill). But I don’t need this shit on my blog. Sociopolitical issues rarely even make an appearance here, and I’d love to be able to keep it that away, with some stronger gatekeeping in place than me just learning to ignore specific kinds of trolling better.