#hate to say it but as great as oasis's attack was this is beating out the 'fun weirdness' of tropre's final battle for me

[r4bbitdragon]

shooting stars lovingly reflected in her eyes except. they’re all f.ucki..ng KITTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[alexandenigtscreations]

Chapters: 1/2 Fandom: The Penumbra Podcast Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Poisoning, cough, lung trauma, Peter Nureyev has ADHD, Heist gone wrong Summary:

After Juno Steel and Peter Nureyev return from a salvaged heist, Juno proves to have a little cough that's more than what it seems.

Chapter 1:

“God damn it Ransom, would you hurry up?” Juno hissed, anxiously pacing back and forth through the garden path.  

He cast his eye about the place, the snaking paths, the exotic plants and flowers crammed into every corner; thriving under the environmentally controlled conditions of the dome.  Had to admit, as far as giant waists of creds went, an arboretum wasn’t bad... or whatever…

That is if said arboretum wasn’t a cover for a shady cybernetics firm Mercury Wear.  

The mission had been on shaky ground from the get go.  May have thought that a multi-billion cred company like Mercury Wear could afford some halfway decent security- but no.  

The place was a mess from the shoddy placement of it’s security cameras to the guard's off schedule patrols.  Juno for the life of him couldn’t figure out why they even bothered with them.  Five minutes into the heist and they nearly plowed into a patrol at least an hour late for that sector.  

There was something to be said for the unpredictability of their movements, lot harder to navigate a place when you didn’t know what or who was around the corner.  But it lost a lot of it’s edge with how haphazard it all seemed to be.  

He turned on his heel, pacing up the way he came.  Cursing the decorative hedge rows and bursts of color from the flowers, making him see shadowy figures around every turn.

Damn it Nureyev- Where are you?  Juno did his best to quash the worry niggling away rising up within, but didn’t have to do so for long.  

There was a cracking sound, Juno stiffened, head whipping around for the source-  

Nothing-

He was just jumping at ghosts- great.

Juno turned back to his vigil, trying to keep the place clear for when Nureyev made an appearance.  Casually shifting his grip on his blaster when wham!

Something plowed into his side, a youthful voice shouting out “Intruder!”

His blaster was sent flying, making him swear.  They were bigger than he was and it was hard to stay on his feet with a blow like that.  He balled up his fist, and planted it into his attacker’s gut.  They coughed, doubled over, and Juno prepared for another blow but this time hit only air as they twirled away.

The opponent may be green, but was no stranger to a fight- that could be a problem….

“Hey!  Where the hell do you think you’re going?” Juno barked at their retreating back.  Their arm was wrapped firmly around their middle and they seemed- scared.  Juno didn’t have time to think about that as he lunged forward and just managed to catch hold of their uniform before they disappeared between another oasis hedge row.

They hissed and twisted in his grasp, scrabbling for purchase on the raised flower beds.  Squeaking “Let me go!  Let me go or else!”  The fear was plain in their voice, catching and tearing at the edges.  And god- Juno hated that, wishing more than ever he could have just stunned this stupid kid rather than dealing with all of this.

“Can’t- Do that-” Juno grunted, and it was true.

The fact was that Juno couldn’t afford to let them go- couldn’t afford to give them the chance to trigger the alarm.  Couldn’t afford to bring any unnecessary attention to Nureyev while he still had a job to do.

“Damn it, would ya- hold- still- Ahh!”

They’d taken a fist full of dirt, red as the Martian sands and blown it into his face.  A cheap trick, an old trick, but... it worked.  Juno reeled back scrubbing at his eye and gagging on the bitter taste.  He’d eaten plenty of dirt in his time.  Unintentionally, of course, but this was particularly foul.  

Soon as his hold loosened, the guard sent a kick to his chest that would make a sewer rabbit proud.  

Galaxies exploded in front of his watering vision as he was sent sprawling.  The kid was gloating and somewhere he was aware of Nureyev calling out to him.  

Nureyev- that thought stuck in his mind.  

A shuddering gasp later and Juno recovered enough to realize that the guard made a mistake-  There his weapon was, somehow, laying right next to him.  He took up the blaster, aimed and made the shot.

The guard crumpled.

“Detective!” Nureyev appeared “Are you alright?” he offered a hand pulling Juno upright.

“Yeah.  Fine, just one second-” he crossed to the guard, they were quite still, almost too still.  Not something he’d normally worry about if it weren’t for how young they looked, maybe the same age as he was when he joined the HCPD.  The hell were they doing in a job like this?  “Ohh thank god-” he exclaimed, the kid’s pulse beat a strong tattoo under his fingers.  Captain Khan would be proud.

“Juno?”

“Can’t leave an unconscious guard out in the open now can I?” He hoisted them up under the armpits and dragged them behind the hedge.  Their sleeve hiked up over their wrist and Juno’s gut twisted.

A debtor's tag.

Damn-

He really hated rich people.  

“Love, are you-” Nureyev paused mid sentence, looking down at the glittering bit of tech on the kid’s wrist.  “Ah, an…. employee of the Board of Fresh Starts then.  That would explain something about discipline of the place.”

“Yeah, I think it does.”

Just then, their radio crackled to life.  Though Juno couldn’t understand what was being said, the way the message repeated it was clear that they were expecting a response.

Before he could so much as share a look with Nureyev, the doors banged open and guards started to pour in.

“I believe that that is our cue, Detective.”

“No kidding.” he quipped.  But Nureyev was already making his way out of the greenhouse.  “Hey!  N-Ransom!” Juno took off running after, clearing a path for them to get through with well placed shots.  

“Thank you Love!” Nureyev turned briefly to flash him the signature fox’s grin, blown all the wider from adrenaline.

“Yeah, yeah.  Eyes front Babe-” he wheezed “you can thank me later.  Whoa! Hey!” a bolt of plasma whizzed past his ear, sparking dead against the wall.  Juno was about to pivot and return the favor when Nureyev yanked him around the corner, commanding the door shut.  

“Juno, the lock-”

Juno saw what he meant.  It was a cheap thing made of poor quality metals.  “On it.” Not the safest thing in the world, but at this range, he couldn't afford to miss.  One shot was all it took to fuse the mechanism.  

Though he really ought to have expected the fumes.  As soon as he took a whiff of the stuff his lungs seemed to launch a full scale revolt.  Probably would have keeled over if it weren’t for Nureyev’s steading arm about his waist.  

“Are you quite alright Love?”

His lungs still felt unpleasantly tight, but he was no longer coughing which was a plus.  “Yeah, jus’ fine- Forgot how much I missed the smell of burning epoxy in the morning-”

“I’ll make a note not to add it to my cologne collection then.”

Juno rolled his eyes, picking up his pace to match Nureyev’s easy strides.  Taking a moment to both appreciate and curse those long legs.  They could hear the pounding footsteps come up from behind.  Whatever time they’d bought with the door trick was coming to an end.

Damn.

“How do we get out of this damned place?”  Juno demanded.  He’d gotten hopelessly lost several turns back.

“Like this.”  Nureyev flung open a door with a flourish.  Several faces stared up at them from the stairwell, “Or not.” He shut it just as quick; moving aside for Juno to fuse that lock as well.  

“Just how many escape routes you have left in there?” he wheezed against the pressure in his chest.  

“Seven.” He shot over his shoulder.  The pounding of boots issued from the corridor to the right, drawing Nureyev’s attention, “Make that five.”

“Five?  Oh, Great.” he skidded to a halt at the mouth of the hall, grounding his feet and lining up the shots.  Three guards, he could take out three guards.  

“A simple process of elimination Detective.” He grinned, pulling Juno out of the way of an erratic burst of blaster fire.  At the same time, he extracted a smoke bomb from one of his overstuffed pockets, lobbing it back the way they came.  

To their credit, the guards weren’t idiots.  They knew a threat when they saw one and high tailed it back the way they came as the corridor filled with a brilliant purple smoke.  

Nureyev turned, leading him down the corridor bearing the stunned guards, flinging open another door.  

“Another Stairwell?” Juno asked bewildered.  

“Of Course love, unless-” he paused long enough to give Juno a cheeky grin “you’d rather we take a window or the vents.”

“You know, been meaning to take more stairs.”

Even skipping two at a time Juno was outpaced.  Nureyev could vault over the edges of the banister, his feet barely touching the ground before he was once more air born.  Juno plowed on, his lungs burning, itching with the effort of catching up.  He suddenly regretted missing all those physical therapy appointments.  

There was a loud bang and a shout, sounds of a scuffle.  Juno readied his blaster, heart in his throat.  He relaxed a little when he heard Nureyev’s voice, slightly strained.  He was saying something in a language Juno didn’t understand, and someone was shouting back.  

“Juno, Dear, if I might have some- assistance.”

It took less than a second to eye up the situation.  Nureyev’s arm wrapped around the neck of a struggling guard, using them as a shield while another had their blaster trained on him.  They plainly weren’t ready to shoot their companion, which was good for Nureyev.  

“Yeah babe.”

The guard only had a second to lock eyes with Juno before she took a stunner to the chest.  

“Thank you Love.” Nureyev tightened his grip on the person’s pulse point.  Their mouth opened wide, gasping, desperately scrabbling with his arm until they went limp.  He held on for a moment longer to ensure they were truly out before letting their weight slide to the floor.  Juno stooped, exposing the guard’s wrist.  “I assure you love, they’ll be quite alright.”

Juno gave a soft laugh “Yeah, I know-  Just looking to see if they have any accessories.”  They did.  He stepped aside showing the debtor’s tag to his partner.  “Been in this mess for three years by the looks of it.”

“Indeed.”  

Nureyev crossed to examine the other guard “Six years.”

“Damn, she looks young.”

“Never too early to acquire debt.” There was a bitterness to his tone that Juno longed to ask about, but wasn’t sure if he was allowed to yet.  

Just like he wasn’t sure if he could ask about the subtle change in Nureyev’s fighting style when they were paired on missions.  

It hadn’t escaped his notice that Nureyev had allowed more people to survive their encounter with the nameless thief.  Juno knew this was less about his own sensibilities and more about- trust.  That belief that someone had your back as much as you had theirs.  The sight of his boyfriend knocking someone out cold with a choke hold probably shouldn’t make his stomach do flips, but there they were.  God, they were both saps.

Juno coughed roughly into his elbow, earning him a look from his knight in stolen armor.  

“Not much further Love.  Jet has been notified of our change in exits.”

“Wow, don’t waste any time, do you?”

“No such thing as wasting time with such delightful company.”

Juno groaned affectionally, coughing again into his sleeve.  

He was right, they were practically right next to the exit.  Nureyev dashed ahead, drawn to the green of the Ruby.  He opened the door wide, allowing Juno to pile wheezing into the back seat before joining him.  

The Ruby whistled cheerily and Nureyev returned “It’s wonderful to see you as well Ruby, Jet.”  He gave nods to each in turn.  

“I appreciate the notice in the change of pick up locations.” Jet acknowledged.  

“Thank you for making the- adjustments,” Nureyev searched for his seat buckle, “to the plan.  It can’t have been easy on such short notice.” and offered a smile that Jet did not return.  

“It is important to be flexible in our line of work.”

“Quite.”

“Nice to see you too Big Guy, but could we get out of here?” Juno coughed, “Surveillance in this place is kind of lax, but I guarantee you that at least a few guards will notice a bright green car.”

“I imagine so, the Ruby 7 is many things but is not inconspicuous.”  

The Ruby made a sound that if Juno didn’t know any better would say was disapproval.  

Once they were off, Nureyev turned to look at Juno, laughing softly “Love, what in heaven have you got on your face.” He reached up, brushing a thumb under his good eye.  

“Wha? Oh! Yeah!  The kid fought dirty.”  he explained, scrubbing at his face with a sleeve, only for Nureyev to place a handkerchief into his hand.  

“Perhaps you’ll have better luck with this.”

Juno smiled fondly, leave it to Nureyev to bring a handkerchief to a heist.  

“I suppose I should not be surprised.  Out of all the people on the Carte Blanche, the one that would pick a fight with a child would be you.” Jet commented.

Juno’s head snapped up, “Hold on Big Guy,” he objected “first off, they were much taller and secondly I think you and I both know that I-” and he caught it.  The crinkle around Jet’s eyes and the faint up turn in his lips that he’d of missed a year ago, he coughed “Oh very funny.”

“I should think this a serious matter.”

“Okay, hey, you know what I meant!”

He spent the rest of the flight back to the Carte Blanche idly bickering with Nureyev and Jet.  There was an odd tightness to his chest he couldn't place.  His hand kept drifting up to massage his sternum, as if he could magically reach through tissue and bone to ease the pressure.

_____________________________

Once back, he headed to the shower to clean off the remaining sandy residue and, hopefully, open his lungs back up.  Juno Steel was many things but lucky was not one of them.  The spray washed over his skin, the steam warming his insides as he lathered and scrubbed in his usual fashion.  He turned to reach for his towel.  He could have sworn he’d stilled- but the shower kept on spinning.  

The steam that had felt so good a moment before now felt oppressive, suffocating.  

He tried to draw in breath, but he just couldn’t. Couldn’t hold anything down.  Fear spiked as dark spots bloomed in front of his vision, threatening to swallow him whole.  He launched himself out of the shower, slamming into the opposite wall.  Feet only just gaining purchase on the smooth-grip flooring.  

By some miracle, his airway cleared on impact.  Juno’s chest crackled with each forced gulp of air.  But he was breathing, and that was….good.  

He coughed again, spitting pink into the sink.  

A knock came at the door making him jump "Juno, love.  The Family Meeting is about to start."

"Jus-" his voice came out harsh and broken.  He rinsed and repeated, "Just-a minute."

“Alright.  I’ll see you there.”

“Yeah-”

Once it became apparent that he wasn’t going to keel over any time soon, Juno straightened, dressed.  The itch was still there but whatever freak thing that had him choking on nothing seemed to have resolved itself.  

"Juno-"  Buddy admonished, "how kind of you to join us."

"Yeah-" he coughed "had a lot to consider, like why you didn't tell us Enterprise Labs had dealings with the Board of Fresh Starts.  You said you'd-"

"There were people from the Board of Fresh Starts there?"  Buddy queried.  

"Yes Captain.  The security team seemed to have been compromised entirely of the unfortunates indebted to the organization."  Nureyev’s hands flourished through the air.  

"We knew they had ties darlings, but had no idea the connection ran that deep."

Rita’s eyes went overly large, “I didn’t see nothin’ about that in our intel Captain A, I swear-  Unless-” she gasped “Wait- let me check somethin’.” and she dove nose first into her comms, hot pink nails clacking against the screen.  

Juno opened his mouth wanting to argue further but Vespa cut in.  "If you think you are the only one that cares, Steel, think again-" she flicked back her sleeve revealing her debtors tag.  

The anger from a moment ago dissipated in an instant.  Hell, he felt so tired, drained.  Juno kneaded his chest trying again to ease the prickling.

"Yeah, right.  So what are we going to do about it?" Another cough, the harshness of it taking him by surprise.

"As loath as I am to admit it.  For now there is nothing we can do darling, save plot and scheme our way to the cure mother prime.  A collapse of their business model ought to put quite the dent in their debtor’s practice.” she frowned, “Are you quite alright?"

"What?  Yeah-"he coughed all the harder "Just forgot how to breathe and swallow at the same time-" and dissolved into a fit.  He was making a scene and worst of all he didn’t even know what was causing it.  All he wanted was to shut the hell up and get out of there.

Buddy gave a disbelieving humm as she watched while Nureyev massaged circles into his back with clever fingers.  Stars burst in front of his eyes and his head was set to pounding in no time.  

“Damnit” he rasped at last, panting.

“Quite.  Well if you have similar issues in the future darling, might I suggest you pay a visit to our resident physician?”

Juno pulled a face, Vespa took offence and the rest of the meeting passed in much the same fashion.  Juno didn’t really need to talk, so didn’t.  After all, he'd just been playing lookout while Nureyev stole some data and installed some spyware.  Mercury Wear’s security seemed to be something of a joke to Rita.  She kept bouncing up and down in her seat with each new discovery on her comms.  Juno very much doubted anyone else would be able to get that far in such a short space of time.  He may not know much about computers, but he did know Rita was one of a kind.  

___________________________________

“Are you sure you want to stay Nureyev?  I think I’m comin’ down with somethin.  Wouldn’t want you to catch-”

“Nonsense love,” Nureyev waved him off, “Besides,” he sidled up closer and delicately laid a kiss on Juno’s forehead, much to the Detective's chagrin “how could I possibly leave a lady in distress?”

“‘Reyev~” Juno groaned, despite himself sinking into the man’s chest.

“And- I'm certain to have caught whatever it is you have by now love.  We do spend a lot of quality time together."

Juno scoffed "If you call a shoot out, 'quality time' then we may need to reevaluate our leisure activities."

"But oh my Detective" Nureyev coyly walked his fingers along Juno's collar bone, sliding into some silly character "I do love a lady who knows their way around a blaster-"

"Reyev-"

"Why, the smell of the plasma-" he made the words as breathy as possible.

"Come onnnn-" Juno mock groaned, hiding his smile in a cough.

"The smell of the plasma-" Nureyev plowed on as if Juno hadn't said a thing "just makes me all funny inside."

Juno burst out laughing "funny inside?"

"I assure you love," Nureyev broke character "this is a serious matter.  Now where were we-"

Juno laughed all the harder, until his breath caught and he dissolved into a fresh fit.

"Oh Juno-" Nureyev wrapped an arm around him bracing him through it.  "Sorry love, I shouldn't have pushed so hard."

"It's- fine-" he managed between coughs.

"I dare say it isn't.  We should have Vespa take a look at you."

"Nn-no."  Juno panted, swallowing against the soreness. "no way- in hell- am I bothering her at this hour.  And certainty not for a cold or whatever."

"It's the 'whatever' that concerns me Juno-"

He wasn't going to let it go.  It was easy to see that, so Juno decided on a compromise.  "I'll see her tomorrow if it makes you feel better." messaging his sternum again.  

Nureyev made a resigned sort of sound.  "It will have to do."

"Good."  Exhaustion pulled him down into the bed "you coming?"

Nureyev looked as though he had something to say, but thought better of it "Of course." and climbed in.  With a practiced ease he cuddled close, worming an arm under Juno's neck so that the lady could curl into his side, a gentile hand running lazily down his spine.  Juno shivered at the touch.  The persistent itch in his lungs continued, but that nagging pressure seemed to ease up.

He nuzzled in, ear to Nureyev’s chest and allowed the beat of his partner's heart to lull him to sleep.

[Reblogs are greatly appreciated] 

[loruleanheart]

Desired Fate, Chapter 4

Read on FF.net

Read on AO3

All four champions had, at last, been recruited. It had all seemed a blur to Zelda, who felt as though she were going through the motions, her thoughts always lingering on a certain man. Still, no sign of his existence apart from his image on the Sheikah Slate, and Zelda was beginning to feel restless, only compounded by the fact that her father hadn’t commended her efforts to recruit the Champions or assist them with their respective Divine Beast, and she knew why... She still was no closer to finding her divine power, although this failure, she had grown accustomed to. Upon her return to the castle, King Rhoam had merely given a grunt of approval and convened a meeting with the Champions where he lavished them with praise.

It’s only natural that Father would be frustrated. Am I trying hard enough? Am I really doing everything I can?

The Princess stood by quietly as her father instructed the Champions, Impa seeming to sense her disappointment and stress. It was Impa who spent the most time with her and knew her so well, although Zelda had yet to say a word to her about the hooded man who invaded her every thought. There was just no reason to, Zelda rationalized. 

There was, however, one bit of information she had learned from the Rito Champion Revali that had given her and Impa a slight reason for concern. Revali had revealed that his village had been repeatedly attacked by monsters led by a Guardian much like the one that accompanied them. This was right after Link and Revali nearly killed each other over the misunderstanding that Rito Village was under attack once again. The existence of another small Guardian causing such chaos troubled the princess. If word got back to King Rhoam, he would almost certainly believe her little one was a potential threat. Or worse become aware that an attempt on her life had been made and forbid her from leaving the castle ever again… At least until she unlocked her sealing power, which Zelda despaired would be never.

“Champions, seek out the hero who will wield the sword that seals the darkness. This will require that you all work together to vanquish the monsters that have taken over Korok Forest.”

The Champions gave their oath. In the morning, they would depart for the Lost Woods which surrounded the hidden oasis, Korok forest.

Later, when Zelda took to her chambers, her mind was still consumed with uncertainty. 

“Who… are you...?” Zelda said to herself quietly, once again staring into that image on the slate that was both a blessing and a curse.

As she peered down at his image that night, she prayed to the goddess Hylia that she would soon cross paths with him somehow. A selfish prayer, perhaps, but Hylia had never deigned to answer even her noble prayers to unlock her power. To Zelda, it was nothing more than a wish.

oOo

The harbinger seemed to know all and shared much of its knowledge with its seer. The Champions who would pilot the Divine Beasts had been chosen and in the past few days recruited by the Princess of Hyrule in rapid succession. Astor didn’t need a prophetic dream from the Calamity to know what this meant.

He was well acquainted with the legend of 10,000 years ago. His oldest memory was hearing the tale at the orphanage where he was raised -  located in one of the most backwater little villages in Hyrule. A caretaker at the orphanage had gathered the children together to tell a story, and young Astor had immediately felt an affinity for the Calamity but kept it to himself. The love of the goddess Hylia was being impressed upon the children, which included regular field trips to the village’s goddess statue where he was instructed on how to pray. Astor didn’t hate the goddess, at least not back then, but he often found himself secretly questioning her intentions. Why would a loving goddess allow a parent to abandon their newborn for dead in the trash, as had been done to him? And was such a goddess worthy of devotion? A thought that kept him up most nights. A question he danced around when speaking with his carers. “The goddess has a purpose for you. She loves all her people, even you.” Sure, this was enough to satisfy a young child, but as he got older, it became more and more difficult to believe. There wasn’t any evidence that she loved him. Apparently, he wasn’t worthy of it.

But the Calamity had set apart a grand purpose for him. And now, he would be a part of a new legend.

Unfortunately, the enemies of Lord Ganon were one step closer to reaching their goal to oppose the Calamity. This was probably why the seer’s prophetic dreams were becoming more frequent, more demanding, ordering him to cement his fate as the Calamity’s chosen by killing the princess.

With the knowledge of who the Champions were along with the power of Lord Ganon’s malice, he was able to create dark copies of the Champions called Hollows which would obey his every order.

Astor stood a few paces from Kohga and Sooga in an outdoor area of the Yiga hideout, where there was a large circular pit in the center. Kohga had designated this place as his napping spot. Astor thought it was such a strange place to rest, considering it was exposed to direct sunlight. The prophet tried to stay in as much shade as possible, the robe and hood he wore making the desert heat nearly unbearable, yet he did not remove it.

Astor levitated the ancient orb. He summoned the Hollows, and ordered them to fight the footsoldiers who had volunteered to train against the Champion’s copies as practice. “Let’s see what they can do…”

“Hey, how come you don’t have one of the Princess?” Kohga asked in a provoking manner.

Oh, here we go… Two can play at this game...

Astor pointed to the Urbosa Hollow. “Would you like a rematch, Kohga?”

The Urbosa Hollow swung her ‘scimitar’ at one of the Yiga footsoldiers, sending them flying across the yard.

“.... no thanks…”

“I thought so.”

Sooga scoffed. “So these Hollows will fight your battles for you? I see you’re powerless without that orb.”

Astor didn’t respond. Being chosen by the Calamity was enough for him, he reasoned. He had all the power and purpose he could ever want or need.

“Soon I must prevent a certain pest from pulling the sword… According to Legend, the sword is powerful enough to defeat even the Great Calamity in tandem with the princess’s sealing power. It’s too important a task to leave to you two… It is fate that I would be chosen to stop those who are trying to bring about the Great Calamity’s ruin.” Of course, all three already knew who the wielder of that sword would be, even if the boy himself didn’t know yet. His hatred had grown exponentially for the knight, and he didn’t know why. It was the Princess who was the real threat to Lord Ganon.

The two Yiga leaders exchanged relieved glances that they weren’t expected to perform this task. Even masked, the two seemed so in tune with each other, the bond of friendship and brotherhood as Yiga clansmen apparent between them.

Astor glanced down at the ancient orb and shook his head, averting his attention back to the Hollows. He wasn’t sure what he hoped to see in that orb. There would be nothing there for him apart from the Calamity.

Ah, Calamity Ganon, I will not allow anyone to alter fate’s rightful course.

oOo

Astor breathed in, closing his eyes and bowing his head as he waited in the Lost Woods. It was a welcome change from the harsh sunlight and heat of  Gerudo Desert.

His focus relaxed and he perceived a place much like this… But this place in his vision had dozens of blue and white flowers that seemed to be growing luxuriant. It wasn’t exactly the Lost Woods, nor Korok Forest. It looked like a mix of the two - dark and gloomy, yet still lush with the blue and white flowers that seemed to glisten in the moonlight.

He wasn’t sure where this place was or even ‘when’ it was, but he sensed the princess was close, along with her knight and Champions. There was no way he’d be able to get close to her with all those nuisances around. There had to be a connection between this unexpected vision and the princess.  And then an idea came to him.

And she was getting closer still… His heart skipped a beat, unbidden. Astor opened his eyes and raised his chin, trying to regain his composure before the vision could send him spiraling.

“And they’re here….” His voice deep, yet soft and melodic at that moment. He smiled, knowing how to get her alone.

oOo

“This is quite the fog…” said Mipha, the Zora Champion. 

They wandered through the fog for what seemed like the longest time. Were they going around in circles? There were defined paths and certain trees that stood out from the others that could be used as landmarks, but it wasn’t enough to point them in the correct direction.

“Why can’t the hero drive out the monsters himself? Whoever he is... This is so asinine.” Revali complained.

“Oh Revali, give it a rest. You accepted this mission, just like the rest of us. And it is an honor.” Urbosa chastised the Rito Champion.

“Are you not impressed with how skillfully I piloted Vah Medoh to route out the vast majority of the monsters?” Revali countered.

Zelda kept quiet, not wanting to get involved in any squabbling between the Champions. She hung towards the back of the group. Her mind began to wander as the bickering continued. She looked around, sighting something that gave her pause. It was a Silent Princess. The blue and white flower appeared illusionary. She stared at it for a long moment, and when she looked back at the group they were growing further away, unaware that they were leaving her behind. She looked back at the Silent Princess, seeing more beginning to sprout up from the earth as if marking a path made just for her.

Zelda cautiously began to follow the path, curious as to where it might lead. The Lost Woods could be an intimidating place, but Zelda continued through the grey, fog-laden woods, unafraid, almost in a trance. 

It was a black and purple tarry substance that broke her from this trance. The strange substance was growing on a gnarled, twisted tree, undulating… And there was an eye. The eyeball looked back at her, and she almost let out a gasp. The iris was slitted and yellow. It reminded her of the design on the hooded man’s circlet. She began to feel uneasy but gathered her courage when she saw a lush path in the distance. She continued, certain that she had found the entrance to Korok Forest.

Korok Forest truly was a verdant, beautiful oasis. There were shallow pools of crystal clear water among the tall grass, unlike the bogs seen in the Lost Woods. The imposing and magnificent Great Deku Tree she’d read about in legends was impossible to miss. In front of this vast tree was an ancient stone dais. There, on the dais stood a figure blocking her view of the Sacred Blade. He or she appeared so small compared to the Deku Tree, but Zelda was still somewhat far away. She moved closer, trying to make sense of the figure that turned when she had been noticed. And she stopped suddenly in her tracks.

It was him! Her heart rate sped up. The princess couldn’t believe it, her thoughts going haywire. Of all her prayers, Hylia answered this one... 

Zelda took an uncertain step forward, barely noticing as her boots splashed through the shallow water. There was a crude stone path between them. The two stood silently for a moment at a distance, the tension palpable as he was guarding the sword for some nefarious purpose.

Zelda kept her expression placid. She was about to speak when the man slowly raised a glowing spherical object, levitating it above his left hand. A dome went up, illuminated with constellations. And when it vanished, four figures stood around the hooded man. The manifestation’s eyes glowed red. Dark energy rose off their forms, sending out the same constellations from the dome they had been formed.

Zelda’s eyes widened, her lips parting in surprise.

What are those?! Some kind of twisted illusions of the Champions?

But her main focus wasn’t on the Champion imposters. Her attention was fixed on him, barely registering she was in danger. Zelda felt as if time stood still being held in his gaze. And then he raised an arm to point at her.

“Kill her...”

[thej13579]

Paper Mario Sticker Star: Really That Bad?

This will be the first in a series that I have made called Really That Bad? It's where I judge a negatively reviewed product to see if it's really as bad as people say it is.

If you have your own suggestions for Really That Bad? or you just want to give out your own opinions on either this critique or the game itself, comment down below.

Paper Mario is a series that I really liked growing up. From its humble roots as a spiritual successor to Super Mario RPG to its generally considered superior sequel in The Thousand Year Door to even its weird diversion into platforming with Super Paper Mario, I considered these three games to be some of the best Mario games ever made.

But starting with the game that I’m discussing today, the Paper Mario subseries has gone in a different direction that has not been received all that well. Considering that Paper Mario: The Origami King just came out recently, I have been wondering if Paper Mario: Sticker Star deserves all the hate it gets, or is there something worthwhile in the direction that the subseries is undergoing. Let’s find out if I think Paper Mario: Sticker Star is Really That Bad.

Story and Characters

Let’s start with the story. A basic rundown is that Bowser has disrupted the beloved Sticker Fest by causing the Sticker Comet to explode. Now Royal Stickers and pieces of the comet have been flung far and wide, and it's up to Mario and his ally Kersti to set things right by recovering them. That’s basically the entire story. A basic Mario story with nothing aside from the paper theme making it stand out. 

Sadly, the characters don’t come out much better. Nearly all of them are basically bland and generic with very little in terms of personality or character design making them stand out from each other. (The Toads in of themselves have become a meme because they’re all the same exact character model) Even Kersti, an ally that follows you on your entire journey, stays static from beginning to end. Characters like Mizzter Blizzard, who actually does have a fairly sympathetic reason for what he does with him wanting to live longer and not melt, are very few and far between.

Overall, the story and characters lack any real charm from the other games and it comes across as a generic Mario story at the end of the day. While the first Paper Mario game had this exact same plot with the stars instead of the stickers, there were several things making that game stand out with its unique and memorable cast of characters and you also get to play as Peach every now and then to help Mario on his quest which was always rather nice. Not a particularly great start to this analysis.

Graphics

The graphics definitely are one of the highlights of the game. It’s fairly bright and colorful and the Nintendo 3DS takes good advantage of the fact that the world is paper. Some may dislike the extra emphasis on paper compared to the previous three games but I think it does add a little charm to the game that is sorely needed.

My main problem with the art direction essentially boils down to the locations; mainly, how generic they are. The designers fall back on various Mario locations that have been done to death by the time this game came out: Grasslands, deserts, jungles and finally Bowser’s castle. You take out the paper style, there will be nothing distinguishing it from most Mario platformers in the franchise and that’s a shame because the game actually looks pretty good on the Nintendo 3DS.

On a side note, I don’t really care that much for the 3D function of the Nintendo 3DS so I’m not taking that into account when evaluating the graphics.

Overall, the graphics, while good at taking advantage of the paper theme, suffered from a lack of originality when it comes to its locations (a flaw that later Paper Mario games did fix). It’s good but not great.

Sound

I’ll admit that the soundtrack is actually pretty good. It does have plenty of great tracks and the jazz motif throughout most of them really make it memorable in my eyes. Special mention goes to the main battle theme, Boo Night Fever, the Gooper Blooper battle themes, and the final boss themes.

I honestly don’t have much to say in this section. I just find this a very good soundtrack and I bet even most of the people who hate Sticker Star will agree with me on this.

Gameplay

Now, here’s the main part that many people have been criticizing this game for; the gameplay.

Let’s start with some positives. I liked the exploration aspect. I liked roaming around the areas, looking for stickers, solving puzzles. It really does feel like I’m accomplishing something whenever I found a secret passage that leads me to a different goal than when I was going down the beaten path.

There’s also the paperize power where you can reveal areas where you can place stickers down to enable certain events whether it is simply placing a sticker to make a ? box appear or a Thing that can really affect the environment, allowing you to progress further into the level..

That leads to the Things that you find by looking around the levels and I kind of like how they can affect the environment such as using the Faucet to fill up a dry oasis in the desert world and I especially like the animations that are played when you use them in battle. My personal favorites are the Goat, the Turkey and the Water Gun with how fun and bizarre they are. Sadly, they are not perfect for a major reason that I’ll get to in a bit.

Then we get to the battle system and here’s where most of my criticisms on the game design start to pour in. For the most part, it seems fairly similar to the RPG battle system from the first two games. You and your enemy take turns attacking each other and you have to get their health points down to zero to win the battle. Sounds exactly like the first two games... but that’s where the stickers come in.

Stickers come in a fair amount of variety with various forms of jumps, hammer attacks, and items. The main problem with them comes in the fact that all of them are consumables, even just the regular jump and hammer attacks. If you ran out of them, your only options are to either wait to die, or run away. Granted, you usually find enough stickers around the area just by looking around so it never really became a problem for me during my playthroughs. But the fact that it’s possible is not good game design.

The idea of your basic actions being entirely reliant on consumables would have been bad enough on its own, but then there’s the fact that, unlike nearly every other RPG ever, you get no experience from fighting enemies. What do you get from enemies? Coins and stickers. Two things that you can easily find on your own throughout the levels and you get plenty of the former the first time you actually complete a level. Not a very good incentive to battle if I say so myself. You are basically better off just avoiding enemies and saving your stickers for scripted encounters and boss fights.

And here’s where we get to what I consider the worst part of the game, the boss fights. The main issue can be boiled down to the fact that they are puzzle bosses with too much emphasis on the puzzle part. They are so powerful with their high health points ranging up to the hundreds and attack points they are all but guaranteed to wipe the floor with unless you have the proper Thing (and without a walkthrough, you probably don’t). If you do have the proper Thing, the boss quickly becomes a joke, hence the puzzle boss with too much emphasis on the puzzle. This is the flaw that I was referring to earlier when it comes to the Things. You have very little knowledge of what Thing you need for the fight until you’re already fighting the boss. Without a walkthrough, the only way to know is to die and possibly get a hint on what Thing you actually need.

To best describe what I’m talking about, let’s go with the very first boss, Megasparkle Goomba. To beat this boss, you have to fight the boss like normal until the sixteen Goombas that the boss is made out of reveal themselves and start to flip. From there you need one of two Things: Scissors or a Fan. Seems simple on paper (pun not intended). However, the main problem is that there is no indication that you need either of those Things to beat the boss. 

It’s far from the only example of this design issue at work and not the worst, the final boss takes that spot, but it’s a perfect example of how the Things work when it comes to bosses and how poorly designed the bosses in this game are. This is not helped by how the game actively discourages trial and error considering that, one; you only have a limited amount of space for stickers and Things take a huge chunk of space in your inventory. Two, they go away once they are used so you have to either buy them which costs quite a bit of coins, or you have to go to the place where you originally found them which can be long and tedious depending on the level.

Overall, the exploration aspect of the game is kind of fun with plenty of clever puzzles and platforming. But the battling system ranges from pointless at best to downright cryptic and poorly designed at worst. The gameplay is an extremely mixed bag ranging from pretty good to pretty bad.

Is It Really THAT Bad?

So, after all that, is Paper Mario: Sticker Star really that bad? Yeah… sort of.

I will admit that all the parts the game gets flack for do genuinely deserve all the criticism it gets and then some. The lack of emphasis on story and characters, the uncreative environments, and especially the battle system with its stupid reliance on consumable items to do anything in battle and lack of any good incentive to actually fight enemies along with the awful bosses. Aside from the art style, which I do like, the game lacks the charm that the first two Paper Mario games, and even Super Paper Mario, had. The fact that the very first Paper Mario did this exact same plot but did it better with more creative characters, environments and better game design just makes Sticker Star look that much worse by comparison.

But, I can’t find myself to really hate this game and that’s for several reasons. First, when I’m not battling any enemies and I’m just travelling the world, overcoming obstacles and solving puzzles, Sticker Star can actually be pretty fun. There may be some issues with that, mainly when Things are involved, but I’m still having a good time just exploring the levels, uncovering whatever secrets they may have.

There’s also the graphics and music which are still top notch with the extra emphasis on paper in the former and the excellent jazz motif throughout most of the tracks in the latter. The game overall, looks and sounds nice and it’s definitely a point in Sticker Star’s favor.

Overall, I wouldn’t call Paper Mario: Sticker Star a good game as it has too many flaws and inadequacies to push the overall product beyond okay. The game was rejected by most Paper Mario fans for fairly good reasons with its lower emphasis on writing and a poor battle system that gives the player very little reason to battle. But I think that the game does have some potential as an action-adventure sort of game. If the people at Nintendo are really that insistent on this direction for future games then I think that these are some of the things they should take into account if they really want to go in this direction. Perhaps The Origami King could take those criticisms into account?

[yxksha-blog]

Secret SANDa Fic

@withyourrhythm: Merry Christmas! I really hope you enjoy this gift <3

Sunagakure was knee deep into another war, following too closely at the heels of the last. For the same reasons. On the same strategies. With the same war-worn children of the Second Shinobi War. Now, all grown up to be its heroes and front liners.

Their enemies to the North have also moved to the east. Iwagakure has invaded Kusagakure, in hopes of gaining territory against Konoha. Spread thin, it would have been the perfect time to go against Iwa.

Except that Konoha had other plans.

“I’ve got movement,” Rasa brought the wireless microphone closer to him. “At the Mesa. C5.” His optic nerve latched unto a foreign figure scanning the horizon while Rasa sat safe in an underground bunker beneath the desert sands.

Kaze no Kuni’s Great Desert was Suna’s greatest ally. A vast expanse of levelled sands that left little room to hide. And with Rasa’s Third Eye keeping watch— there was nowhere to run too.

Not even for Konoha’s Yellow Flash.

“Away from the boundary?” came a voice from the ear piece. “We’re not to engage otherwise. He has a flee on sight order.”

“Those aren’t my orders.”

Namikaze Minato is sure to try his luck sneaking into Sunagakure. The Kazekage said, almost as an after thought. Or at least I would send him over to assassinate me if I were the Hokage. Konoha is desperate to cripple at least one village right about now. They’re running low on some resources, I hear. They need the war to end soon.

“Rasa. Careful. Those are everyone’s orders. You’re valuable to the village and you’re not about to lose your head on account of being stupid.”

He adjusted the position of his Third Eye, moving behind Minato. What are you looking at, shinobi?

Rasa caught sight of a village up in the horizon. It’s not a fort nor was it in any particularly strategic location. “Movement. On foot forward to C6, 7— he looks like he’s heading for the village up in C39. Do we have anything on it?”

“Hmm…” Rasa waited patiently as he listened to pages turning. Some scratching sounds. “Not much really. Just a trading center. There’ll be some water… I guess a few camels for food. But nothing Suna will miss.”

He nodded in agreement. Rasa was about to leave it at that when—— “Hey, did you say a trading centre?” His optic nerve watched Minato come closer and closer to it. Going faster than a regular shinobi but slower than his usual speed. Saving chakra. C21. C22. C23.

“Yeah, you know. Camels and their carts all around the oasis. Hah, can you imagine the Konoha people seeing—“

“Does it go to Suna?”

C26. C27.

“What?”

C30. C31.

“We have trading centers with free passage to Suna for the war? Do we let this trading centre freely into Suna?”

C35.

“Yeah— I guess.”

Shit

“Hey! Rasa! Don’t——“

And with that Rasa popped open the lid of the bunker and flew out. On his gold sand. Fast as he could. Straight for the Yellow Flash. Straight until he was close enough for Minato to sense him, turn his way, and meet his eye.

A shower of marked kunai clashed against a wave of gold. Rasa brought him and his gold sand higher and higher. Just out of reach. Just far enough never to be marked himself. But Minato appeared in place of one of the daggers. Shot another one up in the air. Higher. Higher still.  There is enough of an opening for Rasa to duck down under. Gold projectiles sent flying towards Minato. Molding itself into sharpened edges mid flight.

Minato’s eyes were on him. Evaded the attacks, and they were unto a chase. Good. Stay away from that village. Stay away from Suna. Rasa was still just a breath out of reach. He might not have survived this long had he not been a long distance fighter. Had he not planted a little bit of gold dust wherever he went across the desert.

Come and get me.

Further and further into the desert. Just out of range.

See, the Konoha shinobi always fall for this trap and they almost always never learn. A Suna shinobi will engage. Will be overwhelmed by the enemy forces. Will be forced to make a tactical retreat— with their enemies at their heels. Often, they are led into a narrow path, where puppeteers are hiding in the rocky terrain. Waiting for an ambush.

Except, if the one at your heels is someone who has no problem taking down people in a narrow terrain. There’s just too much surface for Minato to mark. Too much places for this one to hide. But Rasa knew that. Rasa knew exactly where he was leading Minato.

Rasa moved on his gold sand forward— then abruptly back. A wall in front of Minato. But the other shinobi simply used it to kick off into a higher ground. Another wall of gold forming behind them. Rasa rising into the air. Another wall to the left. One to the right. The pyramid forming— racing against Minato’s steps. Rasa clenched his fist, ready to crush the Konoha shinobi.

But with a single marked kunai thrown into the air. At the very last step, just as the gold dust enveloped Minato. He teleported out.

“Heh, almost had me there, Rasa,” he stood triumphant atop the pyramid. A second to catch his breath.

“You’re definitely right where I want you.”

Minato’s victory was short lived. A shadow loomed over them both. He turned around and was face to face with an approaching dust storm. When he looked back to where Rasa was, the man was already diving down on his gold sand as fast as possible. Down to an underground bunker he could take shelter in.

It all happened too quickly. The gold dust pushing away the sand just enough for the door to reveal itself. A stab in the shoulder blade. Then he was shrouded in darkness.

A blade against his throat.

“I hate your kunai,” Rasa hissed.

“I hate Suna’s sandstorms,” Minato tried to move away— only to hit his head on the back of the bunker. “Not a lot of room here.”

“You’re taking up all the space. And the air. Why don’t you teleport back home? Better luck on that assassination attempt next time.”

It was hard to read Minato’s facial expression in the darkness that surrounded them. “Well, I’ve got a big enough fish here. Anyone from the Kazekage line would be good enough.”

Rasa didn’t say anything.

He didn’t have to. If Minato wanted to cut his head and present it back to Konoha, he would have done so by now. Konoha’s Yellow Flash has no more room to manoeuvre.

That’s when Rasa felt a hand on his chest— then higher. /Looking for flesh to mark./ A panic. Flung gold sand and all its sharp edges in front of him. Only to spin away. Light in front of him. Blue light, spinning in Minato’s hand. Too close for comfort.

Then, Minato spoke. “Rasa, this war has to end.”

I know. The gods know I’m tired of sending good shinobi to die on the battle field every day.

Minato lowered his hand down. The electric blue fading smaller and smaller until they were once again enveloped in darkness and silence.

“I don’t know,” Rasa confessed, “I don’t know how to make that happen.”

“But I know it won’t happen here,” Minato leaned back. A dull thud of his head hitting the metal end of the bunker resounded. “Ow!” Rasa had to laugh at that. He could hear Minato adjusting himself, finding a good spot to sit on in the darkness. “I still have to bring something back to the Hokage though. Proof of success.”

“Oh, that was your idea to use a marked trader’s cart to get your seals into Suna?”

“Thought I could make it happen. One life to end the war. Otherwise, Hiruzen-sama would have us slaughtering people bit by bit.”

“What? Are nightmares haunting you now, Namikaze?”

A beat.

They both know the answer to that.

“One death,” Rasa sighed. “One death to end a war. Perhaps… if Konoha and Suna had a mutual enemy.” Which they did—- Iwagakure. “Our Kazekage might be convinced to provide a certain amount of intel.”

“And we get to be the executioners?”

“Iwa is at your door,” Rasa pointed out. “They have invaded Kusagakure. It will only be a matter of time until Amegakure falls into their hands as well. We all know how that will pan out if they inch closer to Hi no Kuni.”

“And Sunagakure will…”

“We might be able to help spread their forces thin.” They are Kaze no Kuni’s northern border. “The old fence sitter is more likely to defend the Konoha front.” Rasa shrugged, “Look, if you go into Sunagakure. We will lose men to you. You will lose men to ours as well as to the desert. And you’ll still have Iwa at your tail.”

Minato shifted his weight, "I need assurance."

x.X.x

Rasa trudged onwards, back towards Sunagakure. The heat of the sun on his back. But there was something else that burned on him. A fleshly executed seal right on his chest. It weight just as heavy on him, as the small sharp bit of gold now resting on Namikaze Minato’s chest—- millimetres from the man’s beating heart.

What? Did you expect them to just shake hands on it and just trust that they were talking to good men? Perhaps, in another life. Perhaps, under better circumstances.

But for now— they were two lives on a scale.

To aim for one death. One death to end a war.

[moczothe1st]

Let’s Play Fire Emblem IV: Genealogy of the Holy War, Part 17: Leif and Let Leif

Part 16

Welcome back to Fire Emblem IV: Genealogy of the Goddammit it’s another desert map. We just beat one of those, dammit! *sob* Damn you, game. Damn you to Hell. Tell me your story, you bastard.

And wide, inspiring courage anew in the Empire’s victims. Still more uprisings erupt across Jugdral, but once again, precious few are properly organized and are easily crushed, and the death toll climbs ever higher…

Leonster, a kingdom in the Thracian Peninsula…

(FIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNN!)

But they have suffered a devasating loss before King Blume’s vast hordes and are stranded in hostile ground.

The oasis city of Darna,

(Guess which one of these faces will be recruitable.)

In Rivough, Seliph and the warriors of his liberation army now prepare themselves to embark on a journey and come to the aid of their allies in far-away Leonster. Each warrior sets aside their worries as, under Seliph’s leadership, they prepare for the new battle on their horizon.

(Well. Finn is back, but he’s not exactly a bundle of sunshine, huh.)

Finn: This is a crippling blow to our army. We’ve lost most of our might in one fell swoop.

Leif: This can’t be happening… I thought this was our chance… was all of this useless all along? Damn it all! I’ll kill Blume with my bare hands!

(Damn, Leif is way less chill than his dad was.)

Finn: Please calm yourself, milord! This isn’t the end quite yet. I’ve just had a word with King Lewyn. He’s sending Prince Seliph’s liberation army to back us up. Until then, no matter what, we must endure the siege milord.

Leif: Prince Seliph, you say… He’s the son of my father’s old friend Sigurd and Empress Deirdre, right?

Hair Wings are the Best: I think we should abandon the castle for now, and seek refuge in that western church.  

Leif: Hm, you’re right. I suppose we don’t have much choice now.  Very well. Our priority is to play this out defensively for the time being. Until Prince Seliph gets here, we must endure…

Blume: Buffoons, all of you! Do you really think I want to hear excuses? I want Leonster seized! No more delays! If you waste any more time on this, then we’ll have to contend with those Isaachian mongrels as well!

(So blume takes after his dad, then. Good to know.)

Moustache: Y-yes milord! We will strike immediately, milord!

(Dammit all, I let Dew die childless specifically to avoid a character like you.)

Girl!Dew: But I can’t afford to dawdle now. Still gotta get out of here, and quick…

Do the Dew: Do you have any idea how tough it was to get my hands on this sword? If you want it, come get it, nincompoop!

Shanan: W-wait!

Priest Whose Name I have Already Forgotten: And they absconded with Balmung?! You fools! Go seize them! Now!

Mook: Y-yes, your grace! But, er, your grace… surely a master of dark magics of your caliber could crush common thieves such as these with a single blow, even from here?

I think it was Cthfuzorc or something: I’ve misplaced my book of Fenrir.  My men are scouring the shrine to find it, but so far it has yet to emerge…

Trying Not to Laugh: Understood, your grace. In that case, my clan and I will take a few mercenaries and pursue them. We swear to you, your grace, that we will have the treasure back where it belongs post-haste!

Lewyn: the order’s fell mages infest the desert, mercilessly assaulting anyone they find in it. People’ve taken to calling the region the Desert of Death… a fitting name, really.

Seliph: I can only imagine how awfully travelers struggle here! I wonder… perhaps it’d be possible to seize the shrine from the Order?

Lewyn: Heh, I thought you’d never ask. There’s always a way, but this one won’t be easy. We may need to make sacrifices.  

Seliph: So be it. At this point we’ve little choice. Not to mention, Shanan is likely still in the desert… for now, let’s focus on taking control of Yied! All else will begin there!

And here we go, the first REAL chapter of generation two. And what I mean by real, of course…

THERE’S AN ARENA! SCREW LEIF AND SHANAN, IT’S TIME TO SPEND FIVE HOURS DOING GLADIATOR COMBAT, BITCHES.

Seliph: Seven wins, gained four levels: +8 HP, +3 Skl, +3 Str, +1 Mag, +2 Luck, +2 Def, +1 Res

Julia: Three wins, gained one level: +1 HP, +1 Speed, +1 Magic, +1 Luck

Oifey: Seven wins, gained one level: +1 HP, +1 Skill, +1 Luck

Ulster: Seven wins, gained two levels: +3 HP, +1 Skill, +1 Strength, +2 Speed, +1 Luck, +1 Defense

Larcei: Seven wins, gained three levels: +3 HP, +3 Strength, +2 Speed, +2 Magic, +1 Luck

Lester: Seven wins, gained two levels: +2 HP, +2 Strength, +1 Magic, +1 Speed, +1 Defense

Dermott:  Seven wins, gained three levels: +3 HP, +1 Skill, +3 Strength, +1 Luck, +1 Defense

Fee: Seven wins, gained three levels: +3 HP, +2 Skill, +1 Strength, +3 Magic, +1 Luck, +1 Defense

Arthur: Seven wins, gained three levels: +5 HP, +2 Skill, +4 Speed, +1 Magic, +3 Luck, +1 Defense, +1 Res

Johan: Six wins, gained one level: +1 HP, +1 Speed, +1 Defense

Dammit, Julia.  She’s unfortunately too slow to deal with the Myrmidon hanging out at Rank Four; he doubles her and she can’t hit him with any sort of accuracy. We’ll try this again at the end of the map. And speaking of the map…

So here’s what we’ve got. To the west of us is Yied Shrine, which is full of Loptyrites, and the desert between us and them is just silly with Dark Mages. Shanan himself is to the west of the Shrine; and directly south of it are two additional castles that we’re going to have to conquer eventually because of course we will. However, they don’t go hostile until we take Yied, and we can’t get the rest of the army to Lief’s rescue until we take them, so we’ve got a war ahead of us.  Lief himself is directly south of our starting point, at the neutral castle Leonster, and directly south of him is the end-of-chapter boss. He has two units to protect him, and despite being told to run away, the three of them can often hold out on their own.  But there’s a lot of villages down there and we want those bad. So we’re gonna abandon the castle… AND CHARGE.  

Now. Before we get rolling, I do believe we have five new people to look at.

First off, Shanan. Like Oifey he’s a pre-promote, joining as a Swordmaster despite being level 12.  However, he has some factors that make him more useful than Oifey in the long run:.First of all, his growths in everything other than HP and Skill are very much on the low side, but his base stats are so high it hardly matters; he’s not really going to get significantly stronger, but who cares when he’s already strong enough to fight 90% of the game’s enemies right now? Even if every level he gets is mediocre at best, he’ll probably still be fine for the endgame.  Second, his abilities are great, joining up with Pursuit, Adept, and Astra ready to rock.  Third…

Dewlette: Wait… give it back? Is it yours?

Shanan: Yes, it is! That’s my family’s ancestral blade, Balmung. I’m the only person capable of using it. You’ve nothing at all to gain from keeping it.

DewTwo: Wait, so how’d this thing end up in Yied, anyway?

Shanan: It belonged to my father, who died in Grannvale’s war with Isaach. Someone must’ve stolen it from him after he died.  I only recently learned that it was being kept at Yied, so I came to retrieve it.

Dewlightful: Hang on, hang on, hang on! Could it be… are you Isaach’s Prince Shanan?!

Shanan: I am….

One, Dew, Three times a Lady: Really?! It’s really, really you?! Wow! Oh my gosh! This is incredible!

Shanan: Er…

Dew it To Me One More Time: No, really, I’ve heard all the stories about you! All of them! I’ve been a huge fan of yours for so long, but I never thought I’d actually meet you!

Shanan: …

Don’t Dew Drugs: But you’re here! You’re really talking to me right now! It’s like all my dreams’ve come true!                                                                        

Shanan: … Yeah, I think I get the idea. My sword, please?

COULD YOU JUST INTRODUCE YOURSELF ALREADY: Oh, right, sorry! Here ya go.

Shanan: Balmung… my holy sword… It’s finally mine… hm? Ahh! What is this power…?!

Screw it, her name is Patty: Woooow! This is incredible…

And there we go. Balmung is pretty excellent, enough to push Shanan into a tier higher than his growths would otherwise allow; it gives the same broken stat boosts as Forseti, falling behind it only by virtue of not being able to attack from a distance. Since he’s currently alone against an army of dark mages and mercenaries, he’s gonna need it.  

Well, okay, he’s not alone, but he might as well be because Patty is, unfortunately, a level one thief. She’s, as you see from the Minor Odo and Minor Ullur blood, the daughter of Bridget and Holyn, and one of the pairs of kids in the game who inherits the gear of her opposite gendered parent; she gets Holyn’s gear and swords. Unfortunately, even with her Odo blood, she can only use swords up to B-rank, and I was a dimwit and didn’t leave Holyn with one of those for her to inherit.  So she only has her default weapon, a Sleep Edge, which is unfortunately kind of too heavy for a fragile speedster to really put to its best use. Like Dew before her she will eventually turn out pretty good; better than Dew himself by a good margin due to having Holy Blood growth boosts and inheriting Holyn’s Luna skill, but she’s… gonna take some babying.

And now a member of the other pair of kids who take after the opposite parents. Prince Leif, son of Quan and Ethlyn, and heir to his mother’s swords (unfortunately not her staves because… well, because Fire Emblem hates the players, and despite being the same class as Lachesis, who could use staves, he can’t until he promotes). As a Prince, he starts off on the weak side and becomes a demon god when he promotes to Master Knight; he’s a little easier to get there than good ol’ Lachesis was, though, on account of having much better growths and inheriting Adept and Critical from his parents. However, he’s also going to need some babying to achieve his full power.    

All grown up and ready to kick ass, Finn is unchanged from his appearance in the first generation stat-wise, and still has all his kick-ass old spears. Our Finn turned out really well, you may recall, and so he’s going to be doing a lot of the legwork in keeping Leif alive.  He’s also only 32 EXP away from promoting, so he should be improving himself even more by the end of the map.  I’m frankly amazed; I’ve never gotten a Finn that was able to hold up in the endgame of the second gen, but this one may actually pull it off.  He’s already slightly better than Oifey without even getting his promotion stat boosts.

And last but not least, Nanna.  She’s Beowulf and Lachesis’s daughter, and Dermott’s sister, and a fairly solid unit. If nothing else, she’s a Troubador like good old Ethlyn was, meaning she has staves and a horse. Her growths are pretty below-average for a second generation unit, but she’ll never be useless simply by virtue of being a healer with a huge range of movement. And with Pursuit and Accost from dear old dad, she should turn out to be a pretty solid combat unit as well if she gets lucky.  

… Don’t be like Ethlyn, Nanna. She isn’t even your mom, you just share her class. Please.

*whew*

All right, that’s it for new units, so let’s rock.  The main army begins moving west towards the desert; there’s a small army of dark mages in their way, but too far away from us to reach on this turn.  Dark Magic is a pain in the ass as you may recall; it’s outside the weapon triangles, which means nothing has an advantage against it.  Even Light magic only manages ‘neutral’ and all other magic is inferior.  So…. I’m not in a huge hurry to fight them, but Julia will be pulling her weight here, I tell you that. Leif, Finn, and Nanna, on the other hand, begin moving south toward the many villages in their section of the map. There are, of course, tons of bandits, so we’ll need to rush if we want to kill them before Blume’s army reaches us.  

End turn.                                                                                

You… you guys can stay out in the desert if you want…

But my cartoonish terror aside, only one enemy can actually reach us this turn, a mercenary who takes a shot at Shanan.

It coulda gone better for him.

On our turn, I move most of the army to the north; I want Julia to bear the brunt of the mage assault, backed up by Arthur with his book of invincibility. I also take this opportunity to have Oifey have a chat with Dermott.

Oifey: Sir Finn, you say… you’re eager to have the chance to see her again, aren’t you?

Dermott: Yes sir! I can hardly wait!

Oifey: Heh. You’ll have to give this battle your all first, then! How about a quick lesson?

Dermott: Yes, sir! I’d appreciate that!

Normally I would say that during a battle isn’t the right time to be exercising, but it gives Dermott a permanent +1 boost to his Strength, Skill, and Defense, so I’m not gonna complain.

Now, Patty and Shanan.  The thing about this situation is that Patty really cannot fight anything here, so Shanan is gonna have to carry this situation while she hides.  But while the enemy is coming from the east, there’s also two enemies south of them coming along the ridge.  

And guess what, of course Patty can’t fight them either. So this is gonna be a dance.  First, the mages are the biggest threat. They have very little chance of hitting Shanan while he’s got his ubersword in hand, but if they hit he’s fucked. So let’s deal with that first.

One down, a small army to go.  

And Patty is safe for the moment. The two swordsmen should both die on Shanan this turn, so she can move in again around the time the southern wing starts getting close. Neat.  And now for Leif’s team;

Leif and Nanna use mad teamwork to barely defeat a single enemy. I’m so… proooud?  Nanna follows up by liberating the village, stopping them from ever touching it.

Passive Aggressive: Lord Quan… Lady Ethlyn… I pray you’re both proud of your son… please, kind knight, accept this Speed Ring. I’d like you to wear it proudly to your battles.  

… I wish I’d let Leif have that instead of Nanna, but I forgot it was there. Eh, I’ll cope.  I have Finn make a run for the farthest village he can reach, the goal being to kill the bandits more than loot anything. He’s actually got funds left from his own army days, so he doesn’t really need the money. I just want to stop these jerks from torching the money which will be divvied up later amongst my noble men. End turn! The dark mages move in and one takes a swing at our girl Julia.

“SECRET PRINCESS… BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAM!”

And over near Yied…

Shanan you are the man. Forget prince, my man, you’re KING.  

…. Fuck, story is happening. What now? Do we really need more enemies? Really?

(Celice and Serlis were common fan translations for Seliph’s name before Intelligent Systems confirmed an official one. Someone’s in the writer’s booth is being snippy~)

Bramsel: The Empire’s put a hefty price on that boy’s head. Let’s make sure we’re the ones to rake in the bounty, shall we? Keep our border locked down for the time being. The best option is to let them run themselves ragged, leaving them wide open to our strike! Instruct commander Jabarro to put his squad on standby. His services will be needed in short order!

(Okay, game, that’s literally just Eldigan with a different colored shirt. You could at least try to keep these things a mystery.)

Ribbons: Oh, that’s good. I guess I’m a bit worried about how you’re gonna have to go and fight too, Ares…

Ares: What sorry excuse for a mercenary would I be if I refused to join a battle, Lene? Never mind one which, rumor has it, will oppose Sigurd’s son… never would I deny a chance to personally slay the spawn of my father’s mortal foe.  

Lene: Hee hee! You’re still going on about that, are you? Oh, you dolt.

(Lene Burn!)

Lene: I mean, think about it. Both your father and that Sigurd man were knights, weren’t they? And isn’t killing part of a knight’s job? It’s like my job. Sometimes I have to dance for foul, leering men! I hate it, but it’s part of the work. I have to just deal with it. We’ve all gotta do what we’ve gotta do to get by in life. I dunno… I just don’t think it’s right to hate someone for doing their job.

Ares: Lene… I understand. I’ll have to think it over for a time, but I do understand…

And with that (and a very off-putting few seconds of movement while the other enemy faction down in Leif’s area moves around aimlessly) we have our turn back. Julia strikes down her foes with the power of a queen.

And Arthur powers up the Invinci-cannon.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm that’s the stuff. I discretely move Lana back toward the castle because I realize I forgot to repair all her staves, while everyone else moves to the west, getting ready to intercept one slow mage coming up through the desert.  Julia is our queen and she shall slay the bulk of these filthy peasants, but she’s kind enough to leave her leftovers for the other, lesser souls.

Oh, and Shanan is here too.

Actually not bad! Like I said, his growths are actually not great, and Defense is one of his less impressive stats at the moment, so I’ll take it.  And finally, the Leif team.  

… I missed you so much, Finn. Leif and Nanna need to team up and use the power of friendship and proclaim the power of Sailor Moon just to kill a bandit, while Finn is just BAM, BRAVE LANCE, DONE.  Weapon Triangle? For bitches.  

End turn!

You are nothing to her, worms.  

And that’s the only combat for this turn, barring someone taking a shot at Shanan and missing.  Which, speaking of, I think it’s time for Shanan to start moving on. See, the boss in Yied Castle actually does find that tome he was talking about in the opening cutscene if you wait to long, and then he starts blasting you.  So the guy who missed him last turn gets to live, because he’s moving in to slaughter the castle defenders and assassinate the boss.  And we add one more kill to the Daughter of the World-ender.

Estuans interius

Ira vehementi

Estuans interius

Ira vehementi

Julia

Julia

 But there’s a lot of them, and if I let her kill them all, the game will last forever. So I have some peons take a shot.  

… I hate dark mages.

Lester if you wanted to make me happy, gaining a point in damn magic wasn’t the way to do it.  I have Fee start running across the desert to join Shanan, since she has enough resistance to be trustworthy around these jerks, and have Seliph move onto a forest in the range of one mage. My hope is that he’ll dodge this one while Julia crushes the others, then everyone can gang up on the sole survivor.

See, Lester? This is what being reliable looks like. Finn has weapon triangle disadvantage and he’s still wrecking these jerks.  Just for that, he gets some money that he doesn’t need.

Apparently Not Sure What ‘Terrifying’ Means: Then there’s Tinni, a young mage… Blume’s niece she may be, but that girl’s still got a kind heart on her. She’s come to our aid and the aid of our neighbor villages time and again… she’s nothing like her family.

FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORESHADOWING. Let’s wrap things up with the Friendship Team.

Not bad. I would normally complain about the lack of offensive growth of any kind, but Speed and Defense in the same level really makes up for it.  End turn!

… And luckily, the AI is kind of dumb, and prioritizes Julia because it can’t miss her. Thing is, it also can’t kill her. She doubles the dark mages, and Nosferatu heals her when she hits them. So they hit her once, and she hits them back twice and eats their health to get back to full power.

…. Oops. Did I leave Leif in enemy range? Well, he’s doing well so far, no biggie. Our turn begins on a fairly strong position with one exception: A dark mage is close enough to Patty he might attack her. If that goes wrong, I’m screwed! I messed this up badly. Patty, run. Run, Patty. Run.

…. Fuck. She can’t run. I… ugh. Okay, well. Patty has one shot at this and it’s very, very unlikely she’ll pull it off.

… Nope, didn’t do it. If he’d fallen asleep from getting hit by her Sleep Edge, she could have maybe held out until Shanan got back to her, but he didn’t and as a result she’s dead on the enemy phase regardless of what I do. Reset.

All right. Looking ahead on things with the foresight of someone paying attention to where units are actually standing, I do a few things differently.  First, Shanan kills the last enemy in his area so Patty can’t get caught in a pincer.

That done, Patty runs over to hide under his skirt.

Two, remembering well that Lester got creamed, I hand it to Johan, who also can’t miss but hits somewhat harder.

Good job, Johan. You’re not gonna be marrying Larcei, because something about you worries me. But good job. Team Leif, meanwhile, does exactly what they did before and it goes about as well, only Leif actually gets a somewhat better level!

No magic, of course. He takes after his mother, after all. Okay! End Turn, and let’s try this again.  

And hey, Julia remembers she has Adept and kills two of the mages she only wounded last time! Her dark power grows.  She also gained a slightly different level, but I lost the screenshot: +1HP, +1 Magic, +1 Speed. I’ll take it gleefully.  

… Less Gleeful, but Nanna will fix that right up.

Right then. Our turn starts, and the main army has only two mages left to kill. Arthur wipes out the one Julia crippled earlier…

While Julia moves herself to intercept the final one. In fact, this is mostly a turn of moving, because few people make any real attacks. Shanan moves toward the boss, Patty moves to hide behind him, the army moves toward Yied, and Leif… moves back toward the castle he was told to abandon.

Yeah. Yeah. We’re not giving up. Fuck that. Nanna patches him, and he makes a run toward Leonster! He is going to defend his home. And hopefully gain some needed levels.  

… This might end badly.

End turn!

Well, Julia’s back to not killing things. That’s nice. Well, it’s our turn again, and she’ll fix that.

Yum.  Shanan finally starts the attack on Yied proper…

And Leif takes up position to wait out the siege.

This is a risk. I’m very much not sure it will work. But the enemy army is almost entirely armor, which means only one of them can attack Leif at a time, and with the castle he gets a bonus to evasion and heals every turn. If he manages to kill all these fuckers and gets mostly decent levels, he will be pretty much set for the rest of the game.  Don’t be like your mother, Leif.

End turn.

…. Nothing happens on the enemy phase, so.  At this point, Shanan could just walk up and shank the boss, but if he does that Patty will die to the other units in the area. So instead he runs up to hit this guy…

And Patty once more hides under his skirt. Fee, who has finally arrived after a million years, takes up position to intercept the incoming swordsman that’s behind them.  I forgot to repair her spear after her arena runs, but she should be able to hold out.

I’m… not doing well on this map.  

Now, Seliph is needed to liberate Yied and Larcei has a conversation with Shanan, so I send the two of them into the desert while the rest of the army starts moving south.  As soon as we take the shrine the rest of the map opens up, and I want soldiers in position.  Similarly, Nanna and Finn move into position to support Leif if he needs it; hopefully he will not, between his bitchin’ sword and strong defensive position. End turn…

FEE! DODGE!

LEIF! DON’T EMULATE HER!

Hoo boy. This may have been a mistake. Um… okay, guys. Take your shots. Don’t fuck this up.

Light Bright, on! It doesn’t kill the armor, unfortunately, but Leif is technically hitting him from a distance here and can’t be countered, so it works out. Shanan, can you please shank the boss?

Damn, you sure can. Um… end turn. Patty will die if she attacks anyone. This is bad. This is super bad.  Unless for some reason the enemy all go for someone else, we’re a bit screwed. In fact we might be screwed anyway if the swordsman can double her.

OH THANK YOU JESUS. The remaining mage attacked Shanan, and when the sword guy hit Patty her Sleep Edge worked for once and caught him, so he’s immobilized for a few turns.  Oh. Oh, man. Thank you.  We live another turn, though this is still gonna be wonky to get out of unless the enemy AI futzes up again and keeps trying to zap Shanan. Leif, as well, gives a good showing…

One down, way too many to go.  On our turn, I have Shanan clear out one of the two remaining mages:

And move Patty behind him, and…

And win. The battle for Yied Shrine is over, and despite fucking up like seven times, we came out on top. The sole remaining mage can only attack Shanan, who he cannot one-shot and who definitely can one-shot him in return. The swordsman down in the corner there is asleep for five more turns, so Patty can plink him to death and get some much-needed Experience.  

Leif kills another armor, meanwhile, and continues his long but sure ascent to godhood.  It’s never 100% safe to assume in FE, but with two levels in a row that good, I’m reasonably sure that Leif will hold the castle against all comers.  Once we get him to an Arena he should be well on his way to outright amazing before the end of the chapter. End turn.

*sniff* Everything is coming together for the end, I swear.  What follows is going to be very boring, as barring a few more armors spawning in Leif’s area, there’s no threats left. So it’s going to be nothing but Seliph wandering the desert like Moses while we plink away at enemies.  So here’s the highlights.

Shanan: You went and took back Isaach behind my back, did you, Seliph? I can’t thank you enough!

Seliph: No, we’d still be in Tirnanog if not for you. You inspired us. You gave us your courage. If not for you, we could never have taken to the field!

Shanan: Heh, you’re starting to put on a bit of muscle there, aren’t you? You’re finally starting to…

Seliph: Shanan…?

Shanan: Hm? Oh, it’s nothing. Pay me no mind, Seliph.  

Seliph: Anyway,we’re finally starting to challenge the empire! Not bad, wouldn’t you say?

Shanan: Heh, not bad at all. I’ve waited so long for this day… we all have, really.

Seliph: Thank you, Shanan!

(Seliph gains +1 Skill from this, because… um… it was… a very… skillful discussion?)

Larcei: Don’t worry about it! The important part is you’re safe. I, er…

Shanan: How’s your sword arm doing? Any stronger?

Larcei: Yes, but still far below your prowess, sir.

Shanan: How about a quick lesson to patch that up. See, raw power isn’t quite enough here. Try putting a bit more spirit into it… and swing!

Larcei: Nnnn-yah!  Like this, sir?

(Must be, because she gets +2 strength from that. Hell of a workout, apparently.)

(Nanna, I swear to God if you don’t get some magic growth I will shave your ridiculous 80′s hair.)

(Fucking finally. I realize that was quick for you, but for me it was like twelve turns of sand and non-threatening combat that wasn’t even worth showing.)

Lewyn: They had no choice. Trying to build new lives on the surface would have led to their mass persecution, or even being burned at the stake. I suspect that at first they weren’t really bad or unusual people, but before long, their life here twisted them into what we know them as today.

(Not to question your wisdom, Lewyn, but they probably could have built a life on the surface if they didn’t insist on worshipping a god that eats children.)

Seliph: I can hardly believe it… It’s as if they were being tortured for the sins of their long-dead ancestors…

(Well, I mean, dude, they did keep worshipping Loptyr. Who, again, eats children.)

Seliph: All my life, these people have been branded as ‘the dark cult’ or ‘devil’s kin’. I can hardly imagine their pain… hold a moment. This scribble on the wall… is that a child’s penmanship? It’s a prayer. And it begs for the return of the dark god… was loptyr the only hope these people had?

(No, forgetting Loptyr and moving on to the worship of… I dunno, Fluffingor, god of soft things. That would have been a good hope. I’m all for freedom of religion, I know people like to keep to their faith, but when your god eats children you really need to reconsider.)

Lewyn: Yeah… Consider this a lesson, Seliph. Good and evil can’t be easily reduced to simple, black-and-white ideals. If you must hate, hate the evil that lurks in us all, not the individual.  Never forget this.

Welp. As much as I’d love to sit around and debate morality with Lewyn (Again, my counter-argument would be ‘don’t worship a child-eating demon’, but you’d be shocked how applicable that is), we’ve taken the castle and I’m very tired. You guys take a nice week off while I sleep. I should wake up by the time the next update is due. Maybe.

Resets: 21. Level One Thief syndrome is a terrible thing. 

Part 18

[imagine-writing-rainbow]

Izuku Midoriya x Reader Soft Villain Series - Help

Trigger Warnings: If you find some more tell me so I can list them. Mention of murder.

You raise your hand to the blood red door of a home you no longer know like the back of your hand, but can remember like the cusp of yesterday. You’re going to knock, you just have to take a moment and gather the strength you aren’t sure you have.

It takes a years worth of moments before you can so much as bring your arm away from you side, but you manage to find that strength and you bring your fist against the door, three times, rapid and loud, then you bring your fist against the door again, three times, rapid and loud.

You’re purposely obnoxious like that, making people listen as you beat your fast hand against their door. You make people listen with your fist. It’s what gets them to the door faster.

But he isn’t fast and he isn’t slow either. He’s waiting on the other side, leaned against the door, hand frozen over the handle as he peeks through the peephole. You look down the hallway, and imagine yourself racing away in the elevator. The door’s creaky hinges sing as it swings open.

He looks like greatness, like thriving. Like he’s surviving without you. He looks so good.

You’re staring.

Your battered shoes become the most interesting thing in the world in that moment. More interesting than the ocean of skepticism in his gaze, more interesting than the bags that aren’t heavy under his eyes, more interesting than any of the too loud thoughts that hunt for your confidence.

He doesn’t let you in without question, he doesn’t let you in at all, but you’re inside his home anyway.

“Why are you here?” Is what you should have suspected, the only plausible conclusion to your arrival on his doorstep is a question.

Why are you here?

Your throat is a chinese finger trap and your voice is that stupid finger that always gets stuck. You pull and pull at your words but your throat won’t come undone to let them go.

You stand there, drowning in memories that you can’t seem to let go of. The ones that dance in your dreams, that mock you when you wake up alone.

You’re so lost, in this old apartment with walls that are yellow like popcorn, with it’s groaning ceiling, with the landlord who couldn’t show up on time for a million dollars. You’re seeing yourself tucked under his arm, snuggled on that couch in the corner, bundled in blanket after blanket, waiting for the man to come fix the heating.

What finally crawls from your lips is, “I need help.”

He searches your face for the ever so slight curve of your lip as you ensnare him in a trap, or the gleam of hatred as it carves a path through your eyes, or the laughter that pricks the edges of your mouth as you make him the butt of another lie. He finds none of them.

“What do you need help with” Surprise drapes itself across your face. Really, you should have known, he’s never been the person to turn away someone in need. Even if that someone happened to be the kind of person who would chose villainy over love.

You draw a blank. You really had nothing else prepared, nothing planned to say if he did say yes. But, you do have a problem, so you should start there.

“Fury… I-” You lick your lips and try again, “She is, she needs to be stopped”

“Who is Fury?” He takes a seat on the couch, that couch. You flee across the room from that monstrous thing, that tortuous memorial of a furniture piece and lean against the wall, arms crossed.

“That’s not important. She needs to be eliminated and that is all that matters.”

When he says, “I’m not going to let you kill.” It sounds an awful lot like, ‘I’m not going to let you kill, again.’

You’re an iceberg, an artic kind of cold, frozen solid. The chill that fills you also fills the air. He’s watching you again. Perhaps for a glimmer of pride, or a touch of satisfaction. You don’t feel those, you feel as though your rib cage has been pried open and your secrets poured out onto the floor before you.

You’re throat is the desert, your blood is sand, your tongue is the idea of an oasis, the illusion of one. You croak, “I’d never.”

You’re a terrible liar.

His face crumbles, his eyes fill with distrust. He gave you a chance, to tell the truth, to come clean. He gave you the chance to own up to your mistake, but you can’t. You can’t be brave like him, you can’t be pure like him, you can’t be a hero like him. Some people have to be villians, some people have to kill other people. Some people have to die. Some people deserve to die.

“Okay, explain”

“She’s harming the children, disrupting their education, attacking during the day and what not,” You gesture bigly. “I can’t have that in my city”

His eyes widen, he leans forward on the couch as if he couldn’t hear you the first time. “Your city?”

“Help me get rid of her.”

“She’s harming children?”

You nod, “She’s harming them, hindering their education, and I can’t-” You breathe deeply, in and out, “ I can’t get rid of her alone.”

He doesn’t even have to take a moment, “I’m in.”

You wait for him to say something, anything else. You find yourself doing this a lot. Maybe it’s time for you to stop waiting for him to hate you; he probably already does.

“Thank you, Midoriya”

[ixcaliber]

I Will Rate Every Stand In Part 5

Gold Experience - not a bad stand for a protagonist, pretty versatile, looks are okay, giorno has plenty of opportunities to use it in weird and creative ways to overcome obstacles. a pretty solid stand 7 out of 10

Sticky Fingers - first up i’m a sucker for the hidden eyes look so this stand gets extra points right from the get go, the zips thing is pretty cool and sometimes buccelati does the ora ora thing with ari ari arrivederci when he hits people 8 out of 10

Black Sabbath - okay so black sabbath looks seriously cool it has the whole venetian garb look going for it and the arrow motif i’m already on board when it comes to this stand but then for bonus points its a remote stand that operates in a cool and interesting way (attacking everyone who sees polpo’s lighter get extinguished and using the arrow to do so to create new stand users for the mob) and god i’m super on board except i do have a couple of niggling questions. Like how did the stand arrow become part of polpo’s stand, why didn’t the requiem stuff happens when in the fight black sabbath stabs gold experience with the arrow? i’m not gonna get too bogged down in inconsistencies and shit that doesn’t make 100% sense though because this is jojo after all. ultimately black sabbath is a real good stand. 9 out of 10

Moody Blues - moody blues looks real cool and also while maybe not the best fighting stand imagine how powerful a stand is that can play back any action anyone has taken so long as it has access to the place where it happened and knows when it happened. it’d be virtually impossible to keep anything secret from this stand and i love it. also the part where it flies the plane by replicating the actions of a pilot. it’s really cool and underutilized maybe. 8 out of 10

Soft Machine - it put a boat in another boat and i still don’t understand the logistics of this 4 out of 10

Sex Pistols - while i like standard stand design i really really like stands that don’t adhere to that and this stand is bullets and its really good. they’re kind of adorable sometimes and its just a shame that shooting people is pretty useless in jojo 6 out of 10

Kraftwerk - dont like its teeth i’d be so much more enthused about this stand if it didn’t have this awful fixed grin (though maybe thats the point given its ability) its ability is cool so i can be too mad at it though 5 out of 10

Aerosmith - remember when i said i was a big fan of stands that don’t look like the standard... Aerosmith great its just again kind of a shame that its ability isn’t the most engaging you know... 6 out of 10

Little Feet - shrinks its enemies it’s dull and plain looking 1 out of 10

Purple Haze - the stand too powerful to ever actually do anything throughout the entirety of part 5. it looks cool enough the only problem with this stand is that it’s a protagonist stand instead of an antagonist stand. i really kind of feel like after buccelati et all broke off from the mob and fugo remained loyal they should have done more with that. fugo being actually loyal and seeing his friends as betraying him and then actually going after them, that’d have been a cool story imo. purple haze is kind of too powerful though so um 5 out of 10 could have been cool but wasn’t

Man In The Mirror - this stand has like a mask thing going on which is in its favour but at the same time its like a mirror world thing and its kind of... whatever i’ll give it a 7 out of 10 for that mask alone

Mr President - apparently the name of the turtle room stand. it’s pretty cool even though i don’t understand why a turtle has an alcove for a key and how that whole arrangement came to exist. is the key the stand and the turtle the user? are they part of a whole? was this turtle just born with a key in its back or born with this indent and then once someone found the matching key its stand was unlocked? so many questions. one thing is for sure this turtle is a precious friend lets say a 5 out of 10 for being more functional than interesting

The Grateful Dead - lots of eyes... kind of unpleasant to look at... the aging thing is pretty cool though... 5 out of 10, it might have got more but somehow it fails to be as outright alarming as 

Beach Boy - any scene where Beach Boy is moving up beneath someone’s flesh is the most viscerally unpleasant. i kind of can’t believe that a stand that’s just a fishing rod is as much of a nightmare as it is but holy shit. 8 out of 10 is a score thats supposed to reflect that its a very effective stand at what it sets out to do even if i am not exactly super fond of it

Baby Face - the first thing this stand does is rape a woman so she can give birth to a specially designed bucellati hunting stand... this is a bad bad stand. 0 out of 10

White Album - white album has powers to make things cold... which is... okay i guess i mean i’d certainly take that over punching stands that just punch real hard. it does get points for being a stand that someone can wear and having cool ice skate feet though. 6 out of 10

King Crimson - haha god i’ve got no fucking idea ?? out of 10

Clash - i do like the non-humanoid stands so i’m already down with this i um forgot what this stand can actually do though.... oh okay just the teleportation between liquids, i um kind of expected it to have something more than that given that it needs that much to be even just able to get around. its okay you know but not what i might have envisaged for something based on The Clash. 6 out of 10

Talking Head - looking back i seem to either be saying ‘i like the design but the power isn’t interesting’ or ‘i like the power but the design is bad’ and this is the latter of the two. it’s pretty fun and is used real well though lets say 7 out of 10

Notorious B.I.G. - Notorious BIG is great i love this unkillable stand, the only stand that actually survives because they’re just like ‘nope there’s nothing we can actually really do about this lets just get it the frick away from us’. its design is great its concept is great. i mean i do have to wonder what the heck its deal was before its user died i mean this is not a useful stand to have at all. that guy must have been real dedicated to the mob you know. 10 out of 10 love this stand so much

Spice Girl - mostly just mad araki didn’t really give trish the actual opportunity to fight anyone or really use her abilities. there’s also no real need for spice girl to have breasts. wasn’t a major fan of how spice girl seemed to be sort of an independent intelligence and essentially i just want trish to be given more and to be treated better. kind of shitty that the one fight they actually give her is one thats unwinnable by design she doesn’t get to kill anything. maybe also not great that they give her a stand thats focused on softness i mean feminine stereotyping you know... that said spice girl is okay and the power is interesting and it’d have been nice to see it more fully utilized 6 out of 10

Metallica - the little metal beings that live inside the guys body i umm i ummmmm some of them are kind of cute somehow but seriously this stand kind of made me uncomfortable for most of its existence. oh oh and i forgot that metallica has the ability to turn an enemies blood into razor blades and shit i um nope no no thanks 5 out of 10 points being awarded for kind of cuteness and the power is pretty creative but i still hate it

Green Day - looks too human like to be really endearing to me... but has an interesting power and is well utilized and gets to do the thing where the user dismembers himself and uses green day’s ability to control each limb independently its fucking wild 7 out of 10 sure why not

Oasis - my experience may be biased given this is where i ran out of good translations and the fight just became incomprehensible. Oasis seems like a sub optimal name for a stand that can dive deep into the ground... and the design is kinda meh. the power is... okay i mean i guess this predates the awful senor pink from one piece but i did see that first and he left a bad taste and the guy who uses Oasis is pretty trash also... lets be generous and say 4 out of 10

Silver Chariot Requiem - requiem stands are duuumb. if you’re gonna add like another layer of power to a stand make it at least like an extension of the power of that stand. Silver Chariot’s power was like what...? well it was a part 3 stand i think it was just that it could slice things with a sword and was pretty fast things were much simpler and sometimes less interesting back in part 3 but requiem silver chariot has 1) make everyone in the entire city of rome go to sleep 2) bodyswap everyone in the entire city of rome 3) i think i remember that like it was trying to bring mankind towards its next stage of evolution or something who even fucking knows and 4) turns your own stand attacks against you powers. this stand makes no sense as a bumped up version of silver chariot i hate it 0 out of 10

Gold Experience Requiem - guess what other stand makes no sense as a souped up version of the original yep its this one. Gold Experience’s power is just the opposite of whatever King Crimson’s power is because we just need to be able to beat King Crimson and get the part over with already. 0 out of 10

Rolling Stones - i scream please just end already at the manga but it does not listen instead i have to read this chapter designed to explain why Buccelati didn’t be the dead for such a long length of time, or I assume as much. yeah also there’s a part in this where its like ‘oh this girl touched the stand and realized she was going to have a painful death from an illness so just was like well i guess i’ll go and commit suicide right now then this seems like the logical course of action’ i didn’t enjoy this stand 0 out of 10

in summary i enjoyed part 5 i just felt that the end was super disappointing and trish deserved better

[loruleanheart]

The Legend of Hilda, Chapter 30

Rated M

Paring: Yugilda

The Captain looked over his knights in the training yard as they sparred amongst themselves. Morale was higher than the captain had ever envisioned for his men. They all seemed to be preparing for a great battle - and he knew why. From where he stood he could see Ravio and the Princess in the courtyard. Neither of them was smiling, but seemed to be conversing earnestly as Ravio tossed grains to Yuga's prized peacocks; that had gone neglected since his disappearance. The Captain gave a bittersweet smile.

oOo

"I'm glad to see that more and more knights are returning every day. I believe we'll be well prepared should Yuga show himself… Which I fear may come to pass very soon…"

Ravio turned to her, looking apprehensive. "What makes you say that?" Ravio shifted his gaze back to Sheerow who had joined the peacocks, fighting for bits of grain among the larger birds.

Hilda grimaced. "I feel as though I sleep fitfully with harrowing visions I can not recall when I awake." She felt like she was losing her mind. She dared not tell him how she'd found herself in Yuga's chambers among his bedding smelling of incense and her perfume. She'd torn at the sheets and sobbed before swearing to seal his chambers or better yet have everything inside destroyed, although she hadn't quite got around to it yet.

One of the peacocks caught her eye. It moved towards the fountain to dip it's beak in for a drink. Something in Hilda shifted, a memory threatening to resurface. Her expression relaxed, becoming dreamy.

"Were they about Yuga?" Ravio asked, drawing her attention back to him.

For a moment she felt light. Hilda looked at Ravio with nervous intrigue, almost smiling.

"Your Highness… Please don't think me strange for asking, but… what made you go to Yuga's chambers last night to sleep?"

Hilda became visibly flustered, grasping to respond, and then her expression transformed into a look of hate. "I can feel him drawing me in," she said tightly. It was the only conclusion she could reach. Of course, this must be Yuga using some sort of enchantment to sway her trust back to his favor, or perhaps, just to torment her.

Her eyes focused on the bulky gold bracelet on his wrist, which didn't go unnoticed by the young man. He slipped it off over his hand and handed it to her.

"Here, perhaps you'd like to hold onto this," he offered, with a smile.

Hilda hesitated. "But what about you? You are the hero destined to fight the demon king incarnate."

"I'm not afraid…. Not anymore. But I pray it will help assuage any doubts you may be feeling right now and help you regain your hope."

Hilda gave him a confused look, but relented, finally accepting the bracelet. "Thank you, Hero of Lorule." She placed it on her own wrist in an almost self-conscious manner. "You know… It is said he created this bracelet in his first mortal life. I don't exactly feel right wearing it, but knowing it's a gift from you gives me some peace."

Ravio smiled at her warmly. "I can't think of a better reason."

"And know this Ravio... When Yuga shows his painted face in my presence I won't just stand by idly as you meet him in battle. I will do my part as well."

oOo

Yuga moved the ore through murky waters; no easy task on account of the thick, gnarled trees that grew from deep under the water's surface. There wasn't much sunlight able to penetrate their canopy. One could scarcely tell it was nearly noon and not daybreak or dusk. He looked to Fayre who appeared contemplative.

He could no longer hold back questions that had been nagging at him since they'd set off. "Why did you tell me to take this route? Why won't you use your magic to return me to the castle as you brought me to Misery Mire? The matriarchs will surely target Her Grace. They could be at Lorule castle as we speak!"

Fayre's shoulders slumped and she dropped her gaze." I know, Yuga… I'm sorry. I do not have the strength…."

Yuga held back a heavy sigh. Koume's attack must have broken Fayre's spirit and sapped her power. Although she'd been in high spirits when they left, it appeared now as though it was finally sinking in what had transpired.

"So…. What are you going to do? About the princess. You know you won't be able to reverse what has been done." Fayre said, repeating what she'd revealed earlier. Yuga feared that this would soon become the sad refrain of everything Fayre would say from then on.

"Well first, I pray to the goddesses that bunny brat bastard didn't rent out Her Grace in my absence."

Fayre silently regarded him for a long moment, clearly taken aback, but not knowing how to respond. "So... You mean to say you don't have a plan?"

"Precisely…. For once…" Yuga went silent. He looked out over the swamp. "Although I do have a theory… I believe it was their brainwashing which led to Hilda's Triforce of Hope vanishing. That makes her useless to them. I can't imagine how enraged the twins must be…This doesn't bode well. I admit I am… concerned about what the twins will do now." Yuga clenched his jaw, turning his face from Fayre.

I couldn't even mislead two crazy old hags to believe I was committed to their cause. I have unwittingly doomed Hilda.

If only Fayre had been forthright from the beginning, perhaps he could have been better prepared.

"What about the boy? He's a knight and the hero. Surely he will defend the princess if the twins come for her." Fayre offered, hopeful.

Yuga clenched his fist. He was formulating a withering insult against the young merchant when something jostled the canoe violently. Something big.

Fayre gasped and grabbed on the edges of the canoe on either side of her. "The twins! Their servants come in many forms! They infest every corner of Lorule. Always watching. They are the matriarch's hands."

Yuga quickly materialized his staff and stood up, preparing to fight whatever it was, a wild octorok perhaps.

He peered over the edge to see a faint shadow passing under the canoe. He opened his mouth to direct Fayre to take the ores, but before he could, the unknown creature slammed into the canoe once more, this time with a force that was tenfold. They were thrown into the air and the last thing Yuga saw was the water's murky surface rushing toward him.

oOo

The sensation of moss under his fingers and the sound of birds chirping roused him. Yuga lifted his head to see an imposing statue of the goddess, Lorelle. Not a very flattering depiction of her, Yuga thought, still in a haze.

He realized he was still underwater from the waist down and recalling the shape of the creature he'd seen passing under the canoe, he scrambled out of the murk, coughing to rid himself of the taste of swamp water.

Whatever it was, it had been no mere octorok, Yuga thought. Worse, his staff was missing. He was certain he'd been holding it just before he fell into the swamp. He gave an aggravated huff. There was no way he'd find it out there, probably tangled up at the deepest most remote point of the mire with leeches, snapping turtles, and goddess knows what else. No one would ever find it. Maybe Hilda was just as lost to him. Just as Fayre said.

He looked around, seeing her nowhere.

Mother….

"Fayre!" He shouted into the swamp. The birds got spooked and flew away. And then silence….

"Where are you? You vowed you'd help me fix what you did to Hilda!" Yuga unleashed a primal scream; his frustration, rage, and despair manifest.

Hilda turning against him... Fayre's unknown but probable horrific fate... His prized staff at the bottom of the swamp…Everything had gone so fantastically awry… Perhaps even the goddess herself, watching from the edges of time, was corrupted just like her mortal incarnation.

He wasn't sure how long he was there, sitting in silence, but at last, he stood and passed the spring with the goddess statue. The water within appeared much too clean to be in the middle of a swamp as if purified by Lorelle herself. Lily pads floated on the surface. A small oasis in that miserable swamp. He could almost picture Hilda rising out of the waters in her pure white dress and smiling at him as she had so many thousands of years ago when he'd led her to the springs to reawaken the soul of the goddess within.

He turned away knowing he had no time to waste. Hilda was very well in harm's way. He divined the direction of the castle and made his way out of the swamp.

oOo

He cut through town, thankful to be in an area he was somewhat familiar with. He wasn't that far from Lorule castle now. His clothes and hair had dried, although he was sure he still smelled of the Mire; like the late queen used to say. The taste of swamp water lingered in his mouth.

He soon neared the milk bar; A place he'd heard much about, but had never imagined he'd be so tempted to enter because of intense thirst. If there was any former castle staff present, he just didn't care.

Stepping inside, the few bar patrons turned to look, but none of them gave the impression they knew who he was, but taking in his tunic bearing the crest of the royal family they seemed curious, or perhaps even put off. After a beat, they returned to their conversations.

A young woman with a pleasant face came to greet him. She wore a long skirt with an apron over it. Over her linen blouse, she wore a scarf that was held together with a strange broach. "Hi there. You're looking quite parched, Sir. What can I get for you? Name's Airalon." She was studying him, perhaps trying to figure out who he was.

Yuga gave a small curse. "Of course, I don't have any rupees when I need them most!" Yuga realized aloud, turning to excuse himself.

"Think nothing of it. I'll get you some water." Airalon said, reassuringly.

Yuga was speechless, not expecting such kindness from the average Lorulean. Surely, she'd treat him poorly if she knew who he was.

"Airalon. Don't give that liar anything without pay! He clearly serves the royal family." The skinny mustached man behind the bar huffed.

"Oh hush, Uncle Ingo. You never know who might become a steady customer if you'd just show some human decency."

Ingo grumbled, and Airalon went behind the bar to fetch the water herself.

In any other circumstance Yuga would loudly proclaim his connection to Her Grace and mock the bar owner's sloppy appearance, but instead, Yuga remained silent. As he waited he took in the bar's atmosphere. Towards the back of the bar was the biggest bird Yuga had ever seen; seven or eight feet tall perhaps, sitting on a stool and playing an accordion. The bird musician started to sing.

"Hero of Lorule, the hero of Reason.

Came to warn the turbulent princess of her advisor's treason.

He perceived the leech came to pervert the hopes of the goddess, Lorelle reborn.

And couldn't bear to see her forlorn.

For how could the golden three ever gift a leech the golden power of Beauty?

That man's intentions were not pure, knew we.

And by the hero's words, the Princess's eyes were opened.

Now that Reason guides Hope, a new era of prosperity for this land can be woven."

Yuga felt a dark shadow descend upon him. He rolled up his sleeves and swiftly made his way to the back of the bar without anyone noticing, not even the Rito minstrel who was so wrapped up in his song.

But then everyone in the bar snapped to attention when they heard the accordion come to an abrupt and shrill, off-key wail. Yuga jerked back his curled fist and released a swift punch to the oversized bird's beak. The Rito fell to the floor, looking at his attacker aghast. Yuga took several shallow breaths before picking up the fallen accordion and tossing it over his shoulder, causing it to give another short burst of a compressing tune, and then he continued his assault on the bird musician. Some of the patrons started to cheer while others shouted for help.

After a few tense moments and a simultaneously horrified and entertained onlooking crowd, Yuga stepped back. He covertly wiped the moisture from his eyes and sniffed.

"Who… Who are you?" The Rito managed, shaken.

"The leech." Yuga huffed. He took a few steps back and noticed the entire bar was staring at him. He took in their expressions. Some looked at him with contempt, others with awe.

"I hate birds…." Yuga said simply.

"Yeah, I don't trust anything that shits all over the place while it's in the air either!" A man with a bag over his head chimed in.

Yuga looked over his shoulder slowly, giving the strange man with his odd outburst a pitying look, wrinkling his nose. But it was no use, as the man with the bag on his head wasn't even looking in his direction, probably too drunk to notice or care.

"What in the name of Lorule is this commotion?" A knight came strolling into the bar, and upon seeing Yuga and the scene before him, his expression completely changed. He called for more knights just outside and drew his sword coming towards Yuga.

"Hold it!" Another knight called. "Are you forgetting what he did before?"

"No, look! He is powerless without his staff, and he can't fight all of us. We'll take him back to the castle. Let Her Highness decide his fate. Finally, she has come around. It only took everyone walking out on her."

Yuga didn't resist, smiling inside. Fools. This is exactly what I need.

In seconds the knights descended upon him.

"Wipe that smirk off your face!" Said one of the knights as he delivered a swift knee to Yuga's ribs, causing the sorcerer to cry out and double over in pain. And with that, he was forcefully led out.

"Her Highness will be pleased." One of the knights scoffed.

"Not as pleased as me." Said another. "But oh Goddesses... He stinks."

oOo

Fayre stirred at the sound of muffled footsteps. She breathed in the mossy scent of the deep swamp and sensed a shadowy figure hovering over her. Praying to the goddesses it was Yuga, she opened her eyes, only to be severely disappointed.

It was an older looking man with greying hair and an unkempt beard. He squinted at Fayre, as if not believing his eyes or perhaps appraising her.

Fayre's heart jumped into her throat. Where was Yuga? She stood up fast, which she instantly regretted as the ground beneath her was now spinning. She started to scream Yuga's name into the swamp. She didn't care if she looked like a complete lunatic to the man studying her.

He didn't drown or get eaten, Fayre repeated to herself again and again. The creature that attacked us was surely some vile servant of the twins. They sent it out to capture him, not to kill him…. I'm alive, so he has to be alive, too….

"Fayre…." the man behind her said, sending a chill through her. "Still searching for your son in vain after all these years?" The man laughed.

Fayre turned slowly, recognizing the man's voice, although it had a gruff intonation to it now. His lustrous orange hair she'd once admired had dulled and turned grey with age. No wonder she hadn't recognized him.

"Killian," She spat. "What are you doing here?"

"I was searching for the fabled spring of the goddess. Thought I'd try to salvage something to sell at a high price in town. But instead, I find you…. You're still as beautiful as back then." He said as his eyes moved over her. "And that staff…It looks quite valuable."

Fayre followed Killian's gaze to see Yuga's staff lying not far from where she'd washed up. She huffed, grabbing up the staff in an instant.

"That son of yours wasn't worth very much. Little old ladies don't have a lot of money to give for apprentices, but you on the other hand… You could make me a lot of rupees…" He said, leering.

"I'm not interested!"

"I wasn't offering you a business opportunity."

A simultaneous look of fear and disgust crossed Fayre's features. She held out the staff and without wasting a moment gave it a swing as she'd seen Yuga do in visions, but nothing happened.

"No… no…"

Killian laughed at her. "What are you trying to do?" He came at her quickly, ripping the staff out of her grip.

"I won't let you take that! It belongs to the royal family." She said, grabbing for the staff, but Killian held his grip on it.

"An heirloom of the royal family, you say? I really can't miss the opportunity to turn a profit off it then."

"The princess herself gifted Yuga that staff. There's nothing you could do to me. I'd sooner die than let you take it!"

"Die? Oh, certainly not! Not when you're going to make me a fortune." He lifted her into his arms before Fayre could protest and held her mock bridal style. "I'm not sure what will be worth more… You or that staff…." He said gleefully, spinning around as he held her. Fayre struggled but found she couldn't get out of his grip. She was weak, yet she resolved to protect the staff no matter the cost. She glared up at Killian, beginning to grow dizzy. He was beginning to hum in a giddy way and she was reeling with hate, but they somehow managed to see her at the same time... The statuesque woman stepping out from behind a tree and setting her sights on them.

Twinrova.

Killian dropped Fayre in fear, knocking the breath from the white-haired sorceress as she hit the ground. Fayre, seeing the flash of bloodlust in Twinrova's gaze, gasped and used what little strength she had to dive out of the way as Killian was turned to ice.