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13as07 · 4 months

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Choose #1

(Kankuro Sabaku)

[Artwork is not mine! Credit to NPC-Dion]

Requested by: @tadomikiku

[Original idea by @justmyownreality on tumblr; go check them out!]

Word Count: 3,756

Warnings and/or Pre-Notes:

Angst

Cheating

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"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow," Kankuro mutters for the sixth time, his fingertips still clinging to my shirt as his lips continue to dance against mine. He's been pressed up against me, desperately clinging to any piece of me he can get since we've entered the Kazekage Palace.

I giggle against his mouth, trying my best to pull away from him, leading to no success. "You have to let me go. I can't leave with you clinging to me."

"Ya, ya, ya," he mutters, taking a step forward to follow my sorry attempt to walk away. Kankuro's lips capture mine again, another soft kiss, his longing for me already present in it even though I haven't left yet. "All right, I'll see you tomorrow, for real this time," he repeats, another quick peck to my lips before he lets me go.

I float away, still high from our date and our not-so-professional make-out session in the hallway. Well, I feel like I'm floating until I make it to the stairs. My brother's voice rings in my head reminding me to pick up our mission assignments for tomorrow while I'm hanging around the Kage Palace.

My head snaps around, scanning the hallway to see if Kankuro entered our Lord's office yet or not; he has. I let out a low sigh, turning on my heels to walk back down the hallway. Why do I always get so wrapped up in him? Forgetting everything else in the world anytime he's near. It's bad Shinobi behavior, but I guess that's just what the bliss of love does to a person.

The hallway is filled with the soft patter of my shoes, Lord Fifth's voice filtering out from his office the closer I get to it. "You are stringing that girl along," the Lord's muffled voice yaps, his voice harsh as he speaks to Kuro. The tone and the sentence snag my attention. I guess he doesn't have a meeting with Kankuro after all.

"I'm not stringing her along," Ro answers, his voice defeated and flat, my heart quickly doing the same. "I like her, Gaar."

"You're betrothed to Hana and yet you're prancing around the village with Baki's younger sister. What would you call that?" Lord Fifth's voice peeps up again, a lot calmer this time. My heart is no longer flat-lined; if anything it feels like I just went on a run.

When no answer comes, our Lord speaks up again. "I would call it having a future wife while you're toying with one of my top Shinobi's only family. You know my loyalty lies with you but I am still the Kazekage. The Kazekage who has Baki as one of his top Shinobis. Baki who has a younger sister who believes the lie that you two are in a committed relationship - "

"I am committed to her," Kankuro interrupts, anger starting to bubble over the deflated tone he had earlier. My heart skips a beat, trying to process the conversation going on. Who's lying in this situation? The village leader I hope.

"Yes, yes. Committed to your wife and your girlfriend," Lord Fifth pokes, what I think is amusement in his voice. "How loyal of you." There's a heavy pause and then a "Choose."

"What do you mean choose?"

"I mean, pick, choose, make a decision. Losing Baki as a Shinobi would be bad for the village, so, choose your wife and break up with your girlfriend, or choose your girlfriend and end the betrothal to Hana."

Kankuro stays quiet, his voice is soft enough that I can't hear his response. The next sound I hear is the Lord's softly chuckling. "Father set up your betrothal. I couldn't care less if you went through with it or not."

More silence, and then "Give me some time to figure everything out." I swear the world freezes as soon as the sentence leaves Kankuro's mouth.

I can no longer hear the two men over the sound of my blood rushing in my ears, my heart pounding fast and my lungs all of a sudden doing overtime. I turn around, the conversation replaying in my head as I head back down the hallway, again feeling like I'm floating.

This time it's not because of the bubble of giddiness Kankuro leaves me in. No, this time the bubble wrapping me up is made out of betrayal and disbelief. A drop of sadness is mixing in and slowly taking over the other two emotions.

He needs 'time to figure everything out'. Well, that's the only thing he'll get from me; time. If he couldn't pick me right away, if I'm not the first and only option, I won't be an option at all. Screw Kankuro, his secret wife, and his lies. I deserve better than a catty love triangle. I deserve better than a lying, cocky Shinobi who wants the best of both worlds.

My dissociation continues out of the palace, continuing until I stumble down the front stairs. The lack of awareness is finally broken when hands land on my shoulders. "Button?" My brother calls, breaking whatever curse my mind has been under. "You look ill. Did you have any water while you were out with Kankuro?" He mutters, pressing his hand to my forehead, his exposed eyes swimming with concern.

"Ya, I'm fine. I just... it was a rough day," I mutter, closing my eyes and sending him a soft smile. "I would like to go home."

"Alright," Baki mutters, now pressing his hand against my cheeks. "Did you get our mission reports for tomorrow?" I shake my head, lunging forward to wrap my arms around him and bury my head in his chest. I want to hide from the world, I want to feel loved, I want to vanish but hiding in my older brother is a pretty good second. "Well, let's run inside and grab them, then we can go home."

"No!" I yelp, tightening my hold around his waist, trying to shove my face further into his chest. "No. I just... I just want to go home."

He stays quiet, standing frozen for a moment before his arms droop over me. "Alright, we'll just have to get up early tomorrow morning to grab them," Baki whispers, softly rubbing my back, his head tilting down to further wrap me up. "What happened, Button?"

I stay silent, debating whether I want to tell Baki the truth right away or if I want to think it over for a while. "Kankuro is engaged," I whisper into his shirt, tears starting to prick the corners of my eyes. "He has a wife and I'm just... just the other woman." The words finally make my composure snap, tears pouring down my cheeks and staining my brother's shirt. How could I have been so blind? So unaware?

"Oh, Button," he coos, his hands rubbing up and down my back to comfort me. "It'll be okay, I promise. Let's get you home, alright?"

———————————

My brother's eyes are locked on me as he slowly nods his head in acknowledgment of Lord Fifth's debrief on our mission to the Hidden Valley Village. It's a simple three-day trip. A day there, a day in the village, and a day back. I'm not listening to the debrief, something about medical transporting, or something along those lines.

Baki is on edge, the tension between Kankuro and me affecting him. It's affecting all of us, besides the Kage. Both men are staring holes into me; my brother is worried about everything going on with Ro.

Kuro is simmering, me ignoring him most likely being the cause. It's been two weeks since my eavesdropping and I haven't spoken a word to him, much less given him the time of day. Even now I refuse to spare him a glance even though he's only five steps away from me, settled in a chair in the corner of the Lord's office. "Baki-Chan," he calls again, trying to catch my attention.

"Yes?" My brother answers, glancing at the other man before settling his eyes on me again. I know he wasn't calling for Baki, my brother knows it as well, and finally Lord Fifth knows it too. Yet, this is the third go around the two of them have done, both men quickly getting annoyed with each other.

"Screw this," Kankuro grumbles, standing up from his spot before walking up to me. I keep my eyes locked on the Kage, somewhat listening to him now as we both ignore Ro, continuing on his ramble. "Will you acknowledge me, Baki-Chan?" My brother steps forward, ready to jump in if things get too heated. Kuro spares him a glance before his burning sight is back on me.

The tension stays, Baki sizing him up as he stays standing in front of me, my eyes glancing anywhere but him as our Lord continues his debrief. "Whatever, Baki-Chan," he finally grumbles, storming out of the room. As soon as the door closes both my brother and me relax.

Lord Fifth doesn't seem fazed by anything going on, his debrief continuing for a few more minutes until he falls silent. "Any questions?"

"No," my brother mumbles, glancing at me once more before his full focus is on the Kage. "Not about our new mission anyway. Button, go wait outside on the stairs," Baki mutters, waving me away as he jumps into his questions about the aftermath of our mission yesterday.

I roll my eyes, grumbling to myself about my brother taking our job way too seriously but do as I'm told. I wander out of the office, closing the door behind me before heading down the hallway. I keep my mind busy, making a mental packing list to help me ignore everything else going on. The last thing I need is to simmer over the events going on between Mr. I-Am-Betrothed and me, especially right before a mission.

There's a soft buzzing, quickly paired with the sizzling warmth of Kankuro's chakra strands. A long sigh spills from me, the feeling of his chakra rubbing comfortably against my skin, only pissing me off more. Once the strings are settled around my limbs, they're tugged on, tightening a bit before I'm pulled backward.

My body is forcibly moved around, sliding back down the hallway, taking a turn, and continually pulling down a different hallway. Despite my attempts to drag my feet across the floor and stop my movements, I'm still at his will, being pulled to whatever room he's hiding in.

My shirt twirls around, skirting from the constant moving chakra flow and the soft breeze it's catching from Kuro's human fishing act. The longer I'm tugged on, the more my anger bubbles up. Why does he think he can have whatever he wants whenever he wants? It's not like he's the Lord and he sure isn't a God.

Another rough tug and I'm pulled through a door, left in the doorway framed by two ceiling-high bookcases. I look around the space, enjoying the beautifully crafted bookshelves in what I'm assuming is the palace library as the chakra strings melt off of me. Slowly, I turn, enjoying the colorful beauty the spines of the books make against the dark wood of their shelves. The walls almost look like a portrait from all the splashes of color.

My enjoyment, and the beauty of the room all come crashing down once I'm turned around. Kankuro is hunched in one of the overstuffed chairs in the library, the big man looking small in comparison to the seat.

For a second my anger washes out of me, my eyes trailing over him and catching every feature of his perfectly painted face. The longer I look at him, the more tired he seems. Dark circles are under his eyes, the edges of them poking out from the purple stripe painted across them. Kuro's eyes themselves look like they haven't seen more than an hour of sleep recently; constant missions from Lord Fifth I'm sure.

"Why do you hate me?" He whispers, voice soft like he's worried he'll startle the dust spread out across the room.

It takes a second for my ears to pick up on Kankuro's quiet words. "I don't hate you," I whisper back, snapping my eyes closed to end my sight of his exhaustion. I force a smile on my face, tilting my head a bit in hopes my gentleness will end - or at least not add to - the rain cloud forming from his being.

The smile hurts, and being gentle with him hurts, sending daggers straight into my heart. Why should I be nice to a man that's been playing me? A man who has had a wife the time we've been together? I should tell him I hate him, tell him I hope he has a happy marriage, tell him I loathe the day we met, but I won't. I want a clean break away and stirring up trouble will only make me hurt more.

"So then, why have you been ignoring me?"

My eyes slowly open, taking in the confusion mixing with the sadness on his face. I let the question hang in the air as my heart fights between wanting to leave and wanting to race forward to kiss away all of Ro's sadness. He doesn't deserve my comfort. If he wants comfort he should ask his wife for it.

I let my eyes drop down to the floor, all of a sudden finding my shoes interesting. I suck my lip into my mouth, my teeth tugging at the skin of it as I think of an answer. "I've been busy on missions and stuff," I mutter, telling a half-truth. I have been busy with missions, just not more than usual.

Kankuro's eyes burn into me, making my skin feel like it's on fire. A few moments later the tension is broken by him letting out a soft sigh. "Look at me," he orders, which I slowly obey. His eyebrows are forward, concern dotted across his face as he looks at me. "You know Gaara - Lord Fifth - is my brother right?" No, I didn't know that. How could I not know that? "So, I know when you're on a mission. I know where your mission is and what it is. I know you haven't been busier than usual."

I suck in a breath, the oxygen hinting into a whistle as it slides through my teeth. "Then you know I have to go," I breathe out, sparing myself a second longer to look at him before I turn away. I think I'm starting to develop a hatred for the color purple.

With every step I take, it feels like a new crack forms in my chest, making it hard to breathe the further away I get from the library. Why does this hurt more than last time? Because last time I didn't have to face Kankuro or his lies.

I get halfway down the hallway before rapid footsteps fill the space, making me pick my head up and look around for the source of the rushing. Kankuro is barreling down the hallway, slowing the closer he gets to me. "Baki-Chan," he huffs, chest pumping a bit to help him catch his breath. "Please tell me why you're upset with me. I'm not going to survive having you out of the village knowing you're mad at me."

"I'm sure you'll be fine," I mutter, turning around to continue my walk away from him. Why can't he just drop it? Why can't he take a hint? Why can't he just leave me alone? It would make things a lot easier.

This time Kankuro doesn't follow me. He stays frozen in the hallway, giving me the chance to escape the awkward situation. "If you walk away we're over," he yells in a rush of desperation, giving me my turn to freeze.

I half turn so I can look at him. "We were over the second I found out you had a wife," I answer, my glare pinning the breath he was trying to take.

Soft sounds of disbelief come from him, his jaw jumping around to try and form a sentence. The wide look of his eyes and the expression of someone who got caught outweigh the purple streaks of his face. My earlier thought was right, I do hate purple.

Once again, I turn on my heels, slowly distancing myself from the situation both physically and mentally. I have a mission to do for our village, that's all that should be on my mind right now.

This time Kankuro doesn't chase after me as I leave, letting me freely work back towards the palace entrance. Sadness brews in my stomach as I trudge toward the door. I love him, a lot, but he's a liar, one that couldn't even choose between his wife and me. I deserve a lover better than that, one that'll put me first no matter what.

———————————

"Twenty-seven bottles of sake on the wall, twenty-seven bottles of sake. Take one down, pass it around, twenty-six bottles of sake on the wall!" Baki and I belt out, arms looped together as we stumble down the sandy path back home.

Our mission went well with no hiccups, hence the light airy feel of our travel home. He insists we should celebrate our small victory once we get settled but I think he's just happy I've been too distracted to mellow on my breakup and wants to continue to distract me; not that I'll complain. If I'm too busy or too intoxicated to think about Kankuro, the better off I'll be.

"Oh," Baki stretches out the word, his tone deep to start the next verse as he tugs me through the gate of the village's barrier fence.

"Please don't keep singing," a voice cuts him off, making my head snap out of my thoughts. Planted in front of us is Lord Fifth, decorated in his perfectly maintained white robes and the Kage hat he never seemed to grow into. Settled next to him is Kankuro - his brother - igniting angered sparks in my chest.

"My Lord," we both mutter, bowing our heads at the village leader. "It's quite the honor to have you greet our arrival home at the village entrance," Baki mutters, a strained smile on his face and eyes locked on Kuro. He instantly clocked what this is, just like me; it's Ro throwing the weight of his connection to the Kage around to get what he wants.

"Yes, yes. Perhaps we should go on a walk to discuss your mission? Just the two of us, of course. I'm sure your sister is exhausted," The Lord mumbles back, taking a side step and throwing his hand up to usher my brother forward.

"I appreciate the offer, my Lord, but - "

"It was an order, not an offer," Kazekage cuts him off, sending back a mirrored strained smile. "Come along," he adds, turning to walk away. Baki sends me an apologetic look before unwrapping his arm from mine before he wanders after the Kage, leaving me alone with Kankuro.

Kuro takes a step forward, a shaky grin on his face as he looks at me. "How was your mission?"

"Fine."

"Did you two end up having any issues?"

"No."

"I missed you. Did you miss me?"

"No." That's a lie. I did miss him, a lot, but every time I started missing him I'd remind myself of his lies. Of his wife.

His smile melts away as a sigh melts from his mouth, Kankuro's frustration with me starts to grow. Good, now he can be just as pissed with me as I am with him. "We should talk... about the whole wife... thing."

"There's nothing to talk about," I grumble, rolling off the situation. I move forward, trying to sidestep past Kankuro with the thought of getting home and having a nice shower fighting its way to being the only thought in my mind.

He doesn't let me walk past, snatching my wrist to tug me back. "Baki-Chan, please," Kuro mutters, continuing to pull on me until I'm positioned in front of him again. "Just let me explain."

"I'm pretty sure I know how someone gets a wife," I mutter, trying to tug my wrist free. "I don't need you to explain marriage to me."

"For this one you do," he grumbles, his face falling a bit once the words are out. "Just... let me talk for a moment, okay? Let me explain and then you can go back to ignoring me."

"Fine," I shoot out, the venom from my tone feeling like it's still dripping out of my mouth.

Slowly, Kankuro falls to his knees, his fingers wrapping themselves in mine. They're fatherly light, flexing between mine as he looks up at me. "My betrothal to Hana was set up by my father," he starts, leaning forward to rest his chin against my lower stomach. "I have never spoken to her, I have never seen her, I know nothing about her. Until Gaara brought her up I forgot about her."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"I don't know," he whispers, shifting so his forehead is pressed against my stomach, his face buried in me. "I ended things," Kuro adds, dropping my hands to wrap his arms around my hips. "Officially. Legally. I would have sooner if I remembered. I'm sorry it took so long for me to sort it out."

"Okay," I mutter, letting my hands jump up to toy with his hoodie. Kankuro's speech explained the parts of the conversation I overheard. It even helps some of my anger simmer down. "You should have told me."

"I know," He continues to whisper into my shirt. "I'm being honest, I truly forgot. If I had remembered sooner I would have said something. I'm sorry."

"I don't trust you anymore," I sigh, keeping my focus on his hood. It always makes me curious how he manages to serve the heat in so much dark-colored clothing.

"Let me rebuild that trust," Kuro rushes out, snapping his head up to look at me. "Let me start again. Let us start over. Let me take you on a date. We can start from square one. Please, I can't survive without you."

I let his words sink in, rolling his request over in my mind for a moment. "Let me think about it, Ro."

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