#had to cut the first one in two in the hopes that tumblr won't blur it beyond enjoyment

[omaano]

"Congratulations on your new job on Coruscant, Commander"

Fox commission for @whiskygoldwings Thank you so much for letting me run wild with these, I've missed drawing flowers so much! ❤️

Black Dahlia - for betrayal, evil and dishonesty Orange Lilies - for deep hatred, doom, as well as enthusiasm and energy (good as congratulation for a new job or promotion) Poppies - for the dead and Foxgloves - for deceit

[moldycantaloupe]

When The Sun Won't Shine

Words; 2.4k

Realtionships; Mountain/Aether, Mountain/Aether/Dewdrop

Tags; Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, hurt/little comfort, Fluff, Anger, Lots of it, Character Study, Happy Ending, Kinda, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

Mountain had to sacrifice his own mourning to help his packmates. He forced himself to forget his grief, treat it as if it was something he read rather than lived through.

Notes; @forlorn-crows deemed it Mountain March over on Tumblr, so OBVIOUSLY I had to write mountain angst.

Read under cut or on Ao3 if you so desire.

Mountain didn’t know what to do with himself that day. Everything had changed so suddenly, all too much. 

His pack had felt a distant pain when it began. As if a muscle had grown taught, ready to snap. They were all in their common room when it happened, all head’s snapping up in unison. The sharp pain in their chests confirmed it. Their Papa was in trouble. 

They all split into pairs to go searching. Aether with Dewdrop, Ifrit with Zephyr. Mountain would stay to watch their den, keep them from harm's way. That was his first mistake, he thinks. It was hours later when he finally felt his heart rip out. One, two, three. Strings snapping off a guitar. Mountain grew antsy, growling at the pain in his body. He put on a record to distract himself, pacing crop circles into their rug. He swears he can still see those outlines today.

The door had all but slammed open. If he cared enough he would’ve felt the whiplash, but nothing could matter in that moment. Vaguely, he remembers feeling his body drain of blood as Aether stood in the door, a limp discoloured Dewdrop in his arms, his lungs rattling. 

“Sister,” Aether choked out, unshed tears in his eyes, “she-”

Mountain was at his side in mere seconds, grasping at Dewdrop. He remembers beginning to shake then, the burnt smell of flesh forever branded to his mind. He cradled that small face into his hand, too hot for their little water demon.

“What did she do?” Mountain growled. “Where is Ifrit and Zephyr?”

Aether forced out a sob, his knees giving in to the tile underneath. Mountain fell with him, watched as the last string snapped.

“She took them.” Aether cried. “They’re gone!”

Mountain remembers yelling with Aether after the shock dissipated from his vessel, remembers feeling the last bit of himself snap loose. They both mourned together at that doorway, a newly broken ghoul between them. The moon was a blood red that night.

He wishes that he could say the rest of the night was a blur, that he doesn’t remember anything past that point. But he remembers it all like it was recent. Aether calling for Omega, a guttural scream for help echoing throughout the abbey walls. Omega taking Dewdrop away from the broken pair, having to spend minutes begging them both to let him take him to the infirmary, promising that he was not going to hurt their little ghoul. Promising his own life, his own home, just to make sure Dew would live through the night.

Aether begged Mountain, for what, they both don’t know. Begged for it to be a cruel joke, pleas rushing out of his mouth for their pack and papa to come back. Desperate for Sister to give them back. Omega kept in touch through their bond, updates coming in throughout the night. Mountain remember’s a second cry leaving his lungs when they were told what exactly happened to their water ghoul. His poor Dewdrop.

Mountain had to sacrifice his own mourning to help his packmates. He forced himself to forget his grief, treat it as if it was something he read rather than lived through. He became a pillar in their trio, something that couldn’t be brought down. That was the image he forced, the image he hoped his packmates saw. He turned his grief into anger, lashing out on his own time, away from spectating eyes. He would not become a fool for the ministry to play with.

The rest of the week was a blur to him. He only remembers the tears, the sleepless nights. The gasoline when Dewdrop woke and learned. He remembers practically forcing Aether to down food, to shower. Aether begging Omega to let him sleep, even if it was restless. He was so tired of the constant torment grief had brought, he just needed one night. 

Having to live with a mourning and newly made fire ghoul only brought them pain. He still has the scar from when he had to get an unwilling Dewdrop to shower. Promising anything just to get him to try and live.

The ministry gave them all so little time to mourn what they lost before they were sent a letter, informing them of their new Papa, and a summoning for the next new moon. Two new ghouls would be joining their pack. Mountain growled, Aether sobbed, Dew combusted. Meeting their new Papa was brief. It was easier when they found out it was the Cardinal, as lousy as he was. It didn’t make the heartbreak go away, but it was easier. 

Dewdrop was all anger. Not a moment went by without the yelling, the cursing. Glass shattering, knees falling to the ground in anguish, the tears. He locked himself away for days before Mountain and Aether busted through the door. That night was locked away in a part of his mind that he had no access to. All he could recall was the scream that Dew had let out, the idea that he had finally lost his Dewdrop. 

The summoning went as awry as it could. Instead of summoning two new ghouls, they summoned four. Mountain sneered at that cocky grin the multi gave him, as if he was egging on the pain. The love that the air pair had for one another shone through in the entire room, clinging onto each other with their life.. He felt something in him fester when they met the new water ghoul. He was so innocent, so pure. He was everything. He was nothing. He was not his Dewdrop. 

Aether was the personified version of grief. It wasn’t until after the summoning that Mountain had to track him down, finding him in his bathroom with his ceremonial robes in tatters. He was leaned up against the toilet, fat tears streaming down his face. Mountain forced his hands out of his hair, watching his nails come back red and bloody. 

“They’re really gone,” Aether cried. Mountain held him close, letting his own chest muffle the screams he let out. 

He took notice of Dewdrop and how he nearly avoided the new pack. The low growl when one of them came too close to him. He had finally accepted his fire, had finally decided he preferred his fire over water. But Mountain knew. Knew that with the snide remarks towards the new water ghoul, the angry stares their way, that he was still mourning his first element. 

It was years later now. He would never admit it but he hated his new pack in the beginning. They were not the warm and chaos of Ifrit, the slow melodies of Zephyr. Their chaos was like a lightning storm, their warmth more like a summer’s day rather a hearth. Their slow, tender moments were different. Calling them warm would be wrong, calling them cold would be a lie. He never knows how to explain it, so he doesn’t. He thinks, hopes, that at least Aether understands. 

It was a slow Wednesday. He was in the kitchen when he heard it, the slow start to the song he swore never to hear again coming from their living space. He turned in time to see Swiss putting the sleeve of the record on display, showcasing to the world the music that played that night. A record they hadn’t touched since, letting it rot away at the back of their stack. But Swiss didn’t know that. He couldn’t have. Mountain watched as he walked towards Cumulus on the couch, offering a hand to her. She giggled and accepted, being hoisted up onto her feet as he began dancing with her. 

He caught eyes with Aether just in time. He couldn’t bear it. The sorrow in his eyes. The mild acceptance that coursed through his stature. His eyes flickered over to where Rain was now with Dewdrop, dancing together. Dew had a dopey smile on his face, Rain laughing at some remark that Swiss had said. Mountain realized at that moment that, no, he wasn’t over it.

He waited until Aether looked back to the group to walk away, abandoning his tea. He slipped out of their den, walking out towards the windy skies. He felt the earth welcoming him underneath his bare feet, calling him home. He headed towards his greenhouse.

Once inside, he heaved a sigh. He felt the familiar sting in his nose, his eyes begging to let the tears slip. But he didn’t know how, he couldn’t remember how. When was the last time he had cried about his first pack? 

The earth ghoul made his way towards the back of the greenhouse, kneeling down to the flowers that occupied the space. They were the most taken care of out of all of the plants he catered for, one flower bed for each pack member, new and old. He sat down at the start of the flowers, staring at them. Monsella tulips, lavender, marigolds. Perfectly cared for. Something he couldn’t provide then, he provided now.

It was only recently when Mountain realized that he treated his past pack as an idea rather than a memory. Something that never existed outside of his head. He wished he could say that had scared him, but all he felt was numb. He doesn’t remember not feeling numb towards his grief. 

He always had a distraction from himself. His drums, his new pack, his plants. It was rare that he was by himself with nothing to do, to let his thoughts fester. It was always a couple months before the anniversary that everything would come to a head in his psyche, forcing him to relive the trauma all over again. It seemed he was the only one of them that experienced this, and every year he felt all the guilt and grief weigh him down.

He hid the first two times this happened, too overwhelmed to even begin knowing what to do with himself.  He hid in his room, door locked and curtains drawn. His pack collectively had given him three days the first time before Dew lock picked his way in, Aether eyeing the untouched food at the ground. He knows what it smelt like when they walked in; rotting leaves, mildew. He hadn’t showered for a week at that point, barely let the sun touch him. He fought tooth and nail with Aether to just get out of the bed, baring his fangs to the fire ghoul when he just stood there, eyes wide and unseeing. When he wanted to yell at both of them, he couldn’t even let out a word. All he could do was to give in and comply.

Now, he still hid away, but he left his door unlocked for his pack. Just to give them peace of mind.

He was forced out his head when he heard the door to the greenhouse open. He didn’t flinch, didn’t bother turning to see who it was. The scent of chlorine infiltrated his nostrils. He continued to pet one of the tulips, letting the soft touch ground him.

Aether continued walking towards him before he sat himself down right next to Mountain, close to the lavender. Mountain only gave him a glance to tell him that he was here, he was present. They sat like that for minutes, watching the flowers glow in the evening sun. Aether was the first to break the silence.

“Did Ivy ever tell you what Ifrit did when he was first summoned?” Aether turned to Mountain with a crooked smile. Mountain shook his head with creased brows.

“Papa was giving Ifrit a tour of the greenhouse, for some reason, and even encouraged him to touch one of the flowers.” Aether chuckled.

Mountain’s eyes went wide, his brows further creasing. “Seriously?”

“Yeah. turns out it was one of the flowers that Ivy had just gotten to bloom after maybe weeks of waiting, and, you know.” Aether made a noise that mimicked the explosion, hands gesturing a smoke cloud.��

It was Mountain’s turn to chuckle, running a hand down his face. “Oh, Satanas.”

“Yeah, you think Dew’s rage is bad, have you ever seen Ivy’s?” 

“No,” Mountain looked over at Aether, his hand against his chin, “and I never want to see it.”

They both laughed quietly, humming in unison when their laughs began to slow. Aether pursed his lips inward, rubbing his fingers over a stray rock.

“I miss them.” He nearly whispers.

Mountain sighed, his smile starting to slip. “I know.”

It was a minute more before he heaved a sigh, letting go of the tulip in favor of holding Aether close to him, letting the quint rest his head on his shoulder.

“I miss them, too.” He finally admitted. Aether looked up at him, a sad smile on his lips. Mountain felt the sting of tears from earlier, a shaky inhale, his form slumped. Finally, he let himself go.

Aether said nothing as Mountain silently cried, only rubbed at his shaking back in soothing notions. His hand covered his mouth, desperate to hide any whines that may leak through.

“I miss them so much, Aether.” He hiccuped. “It hurts so much.”

“I know,” Aether pressed a kiss into his shoulder, “just let it out for me, big guy.”

He let years of pent up tears flow out of him, finding comfort in his mate’s embrace. He cursed the ministry for what they did, what they had done to his pack and Papa. He let his years of anger, his grief, all his sorrow out. When his cries died down to small hiccups and shaky breaths, Aether had him stand. He wiped his tears away, smoothed down his hair, and walked them both back up to their den.

What waited for them was home. Nobody commented on his red, glassy eyes, or his slumped figure, or the way he held onto Aether as if he was his life. They all yelled at the two of them to sit down at the dinner table and eat, Cirrus specifically pushing them to the dining room. He ate in his own silence and listened intently to his pack talk about their days, random stories from the past, bickering with one another. Dew talked about something him and Zephyr used to do, a grin plastered on his face. Aether kept a hand on his thigh, rubbing circles with his thumb. He would never admit it outwardly, but that small notion kept him there. Kept him grounded during their dinner. 

Mountain caught eyes with him and gave him a soft smile, one that met his eyes. He was ready to finally accept this new life, he thinks.

[storiesbyjes2g]

New look, same story

Hey folks! Did you enjoy the memory lane posts? I know I did! Before we jump back into the story, I want to give you a heads up. For the TL;DR folks, I'm rebranding The Piersons and Friends, so be on the lookout for new banners, colors, etc.

For those who enjoy my thought process, board my train of thought under the cut. (woo wooooo!)

A year or two ago, I gave my blogs one cohesive look. I wanted to brand myself! So I made this banner and have been using the colors and fonts from it for everything.

In the spirit of rebranding, I also remade the banners for PnF to match this new style.

Recently, I realized this was a mistake. I make different banners for my stories to give them their own identities. Changing PnF's assets to match the blogs essentially took away its identity, and that's probably why I've felt a bit unsettled when looking at it lately; it didn't work for me anymore. I needed to change it, but to what?

This story is a rotation, but it's also the story of a family, the Piersons. That's why I used trees in the previous banner. The tree also reinforces the organic feel I want. The story is funny sometimes, but it's not a comedy. It's sometimes dramatic, but it's not a soap opera. It's everything all at once and flows in and out of various emotions seamlessly--organically!--which is why script fonts work well for the title. Looking back at old banners, I had those elements and didn't even realize what they meant and how well they worked.

It was clear I needed to go back to my roots with the tree and script font, so I set out to make something new. I also needed to move away from the black and yellow. Even though I could think hard and come up with some deep, philosophical reason for why I use those colors, frankly, there is no reason. I was new to storytelling on Tumblr at the time, and I just did what I saw other people doing. Also, I didn't have the design knowledge I have now and was just winging it.

Black doesn't convey organic according to color theory, so I ditched it, made white my primary neutral, and introduced green, which just so happens to be Kameron's favorite color! I suppose, theoretically, we can pay homage to him for generations after he's gone, but I'm sure this story won't be around that long. I also wanted to make the banners more modern to match the present-day setting. After trying a LOT of different designs, this is what I came up with!

I know, I know. "But, Jess! Where's the tree???" It's there! I promise lol. It's just very blurred and covered in bokeh. I think it works for the modern style. It still feels very organic to me, so it's working.

I added the characters' names to the banner because I think it will help new people who begin reading in the middle.

So what do you think??? Did I accomplish my goals? Does it work for you?

My design brain tells me I should go ALL the way with this branding thing and change my dialogue typeface to the sans serif one I'm using for the subheading. But, a. it only comes in regular, thin, and bold, and not having italics is problematic for me (see what I did there lol), and b. Myriad Pro is perfect for what we do because it's clean, readable, and has multiple fonts in its family. I experimented with green text, but yellow just works better. Honestly that's how I started using yellow in the first place. But anyway, that's my announcement! I hope you enjoy the new hotness!

[roll-da-credits]

A Bunny with Bunny?  -Tamaki x reader-

Word count: 2k

Tamaki was someone who needed constant reassuring, you knew that when getting in a relationship with him. But sometimes, you forget. With a new tiny addition to your family distracting you and taking all your time, its hard not to get insecure and jealous.

A/n: AHHHHHHH, I can’t. I hope you guys enjoy the first fanfic I post here. I’ve literally never posted in Tumblr ever. I’ve always used Wattpad.

It was common knowledge by this point that Tamaki Amajiki had a lot of insecurities and anxiety. It only heightened when it came to you.

Although, a lot of the time you diffused his anxiety and insecurities pretty quickly once you realized. Whenever it came to you, he found himself deep in thought at night thinking if he deserved you.

In his mind, you were an incredible person with an equally wonderful personality. While he, on the other hand, was shy and riddled with nervousness at any social interaction. You shone bright, much like Mirio, he thought of himself as nothing compared to you.

Every single time he's had one of those thoughts, you'd be able to sense his doubts by the way he carried himself. Not doubts about your relationship or you, but on himself.

So, the entire day you'd stick close to him, showering him with light affection that you knew won't embarrass or make him feel even more embarrassed.

He considered himself EXTREMELY lucky to have someone as understanding and caring as you in his life. He knew dealing with his myriad of issues was difficult. But you went through them with no problem.

You even helped him with helping himself. By your constant words of affirmation, he's been able to be a bit more confident, even when you weren't there to help him.

Time went on, and by the second year you were dating, he barely had any doubts about himself in your relationship.

That is until he heard your conversation with Nejire.

"Just look at him!!!" You squealed in excitement.

 He was going through a hallway when he heard your and Nejire's voice when the hallways separated to the right and left. He stopped to listen in, curious about what you were talking about.

 "He is adorable." Nejire seemed to agree with you, peeking at the corner. He saw how you gushed about whatever photo you were showing Nejire.

His heart sank a little bit, but he wanted to give the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it was a photo of a family member.

"I just met him like last week and already have A LOT of photos of him."

Ok, this is starting to not sound like a family member.

Maybe it's a friend's baby brother. You have a lot of friends outside of the school you were close to their siblings as well.

"I just want to pamper him with all the kisses in the world and give him world!!!" You gushed.

Shit.

 Tamaki felt his heart drop. There's no way you were talking about a family member. Not by the way you seem to be enamored by them.

He tried to think back on when you seemed to lose interest. Thinking back to last week, did you act any differently?

If you did, he didn't notice it. The problem was last week you said you were ridiculously busy with stuff at home. He could even see from the tapping of your foot to the ground when it was last period you were aching to go back home.

Was it because of this new guy?

His heart clenched at the thought.

"God, I love him so much." His mind begged him to stop listening.

But before walking away, he wanted to hear what Nejire might say. There's no way his best friend would be ok with this.

There's no way she wouldn't protest at you being infatuated with another person when you were still in a relationship with Tamaki. That's just what a good friend would do. Instead of that, she said jokingly.

"Watch out a certain blue-haired boy might get jealous." You both laughed at her remark.

Did you think he wouldn't get jealous over you doting on another guy?

Did the nights you spent together cuddling and napping together really meant nothing to you?

His insecurities crept back into his mind. Tiny voices whispered about how he should've expected it. He should've expected someone as radiant as you would never want to be with someone like him.

His vision was blurred by the lot of tears that came down as he furiously tried to wipe them away.

He didn't watch the way he was going, and as a result, he bumped in head first to someone's chest.

He tried to mutter an apology, yet it came out as a stuttering mess of squeaks. "Woah! Slow down, Tamaki. What's wrong?"

Mirio.

Thankfully the guy he bumped into was Mirio, one of the most understanding guys he ever known.

Mirio pulled Tamaki to the side, where they both sat on a nearby seat. He patiently waited as Tamaki rubbed his eyes red, trying to clear his eyes from tears.

When Tamaki finally calmed down a little and is now just sniffling once in a while, Mirio braved himself to ask the question.

"Hey, Tamaki, what's wrong?" Tamaki's gaze still fixed to the ground, spoke in a voice barely above a whisper. "I think Y/n doesn't love me anymore."

Mirio's eyes went wide in shock. He didn't believe that in a second. You're the person who'd take any chance you can get to attack Tamaki with kisses or force him to cuddle with you whenever he felt unloved.

"Why do you think that?" Mirio composed himself. "I overheard them and Nejire talking about some guy she found cu- cute."

He stuttered a little bit at the end, finding it hard to believe that he would ever say that out loud.

"There has to be a misunderstanding here. Are you sure it's not just some celebrity or a family member?"

Tamaki heard the small panic in Mirio's voice. He knew Mirio didn't want to accept the fact either. "I heard them say that they just met him last week and that they wanted to give him kisses."

Mirio rubbed his temples to try and cope with the upcoming headache caused by stress.

There would be no way that you'd do that to Tamaki, is there?

There was a possibility that you and Tamaki's relationship didn't work out. He knew relationships aren't always permanent. But he didn't believe that you'd be such a coward, flirting with other guys when you were still in a relationship with someone who's head over heels for you.

"Tamaki, how about this." Mirio wanted to come up with a plan. Since it was already time to go home anyway, he thought it'd be a great idea to do it. "You and I can both go to Y/n's house, where they're most likely at right now, then we can talk about it."

Tamaki looked like he was about to disagree until, Mirio cut him off, "We need to make sure we read the situation correctly. We don't want to assume the worse, but at the same time, we shouldn't be needlessly positive either."

Tamaki gaped at Mirio's calmness. He knew he was so lucky to have Mirio as a friend. Someone level-headed that was able to bring Tamaki's mind to the situation at hand.

Tamaki agreed with Mirio together made their way over to your house. Albeit, both of them pretty nervous about what they might uncover.

When reaching your front door, Tamaki noticed how your parent's car wasn't there, which meant they weren't home. Tamaki took the spare key you gave him and opened the door.

It was relatively quiet until there was a high-pitched squeal from your bedroom.

Tamaki jumped at the sudden sound, and Mirio identified it as Nejire's voice.

"HE LOOKS CUTER IN PERSON!!!" They both heard Nejire scream.

Both the boys had incredibly bad feelings about this. Nejire's statement only confirmed the fact that you had brought this guy to your house.

Tamaki shook his head when Mirio motioned him to open the door to your bedroom.

He didn't want to see you all over a new guy who took your interest.

Hell, he didn't even want to be there in the first place.

Mirio sighed and nodded. He understood the circumstances his best friend was in and decided to open the door first.

When he did, the sight made his mouth gape open.

"Mirio!" You greeted the Tintin looking man (he looks like Tintin sue me.) "I've been looking for you everywhere. I want you to meet a special someone."

Tamaki, from behind Mirio's muscular physique, was still hidden from the two other people in the room and also couldn't see anything.

He only assumed the worst.

"This is Shiro. My parents bought him as a gift, and isn't he just the cutest little thing."

Wait

Wait

WAIT

BOUGHT??

WHAT DO YOU MEAN BOUGHT???

Tamaki pulled Mirio away from the door frame and looked at the sight that made Mirio so speechless.

Nejire was sitting cross-legged on the bed, her hand filled with fresh and clean greens.

You were sitting cross-legged as well, but on the ground. In the middle of your legs slept a tiny little black and white Dutch rabbit. (search them up they're adorable)

Now he understood why Mirio was speechless.

It was never a family member.

It was never a new guy.

It was never even a human being.

It was a fucking bunny.

He got so jealous to the point of crying, over a damn bunny.

Embarrassment seeped through him and he instantly walked to the corner of the wall to face it.

He should've noticed the litter box in your house. And how there were tufts of fur stuck on your clothes.

God, he felt so dumb.

You were so confused at your boyfriend's sudden timidness, but because of the tiny little ball of fur currently sleeping where you're sitting. There's no way you'd move and stir him from his sleep.

Mirio laughed out loud, and you quickly quieted him, explaining how bunnies are easily spooked.

He apologized and sat cross-legged in front of you, examining the tiny bunny thankfully still deep in slumber.

"Tamaki heard you talking about little Shiro to Nejire today." You nodded, while your hand softly caresses Shiro's head.

Tamaki shuffled closer into the wall, wishing to any god out there to melt into the wall. "After he told me, we genuinely thought you found a new boyfriend."

Your eyes widened and you looked over to your shy boyfriend.

Your heart ached at the thought.

Luckily for you, Shiro began waking up. Upon waking up, he promptly walked away from you to examine the new human being in the corner of the room, Tamaki.

You stood and gave Tamaki the biggest hug from the back you could muster.

Shiro nuzzled on Tamaki's ankles a little bit, making you giggle. "He seems to like you a lot!" Tamaki still refused to turn your way.

"You know in the RARE chance that I find someone even better than you. Which may I add is close to impossible I would never lie to you and still be in a relationship with you." He valued your honesty and the way you didn't try and make empty promises.

Mirio and Nejire took this as a cue to leave. Nejire, leaving the leafy greens on your bedside table above some tissues.

You took Tamaki's arm and turned him to look at you.

"Hey, hey. Have you been crying over this?" His gaze still fixated on the floor, he nodded.

You sighed and took one of your hands to his cheek to caress it. He enjoyed the warmth of your hand and leaned into it more.

Still trying to reassure him, you gave him a small peck on his lips.

Reminding him that right now, he was the most precious HUMAN guy in your life.

Shiro suddenly thumped at the ground with his two back legs. Both of you glanced over at the tiny bunny.

He looked pissed. He seemed to be demanding your attention and is furious to not be getting any.

Both of you burst into laughter at the silly behavior your bunny was now showing. You both sat down on the floor and began to give the bunny attention.

"See even he's jealous of you." You picked Shiro up on both your hands, all his four feet safely planted on the palm of your hand close to your stomach and not high from the ground.

Tamaki looked at you and Shiro and smiled intently. "Bunny with their pet bunny."

Your face heated up at the comment he made using your pet name, "oh shut up." You tried not to sound flustered but failed miserably. By the dopey smile you have decorating your face right now, Tamaki knew you were still ridiculously in love with him.

Even if one day you're not, Tamaki feels good knowing you'd break up with him before you hurt him any further.

After all, you are his most precious, incredible, kind, caring, daring, loving, patient.

Bunny

[aala-13jellychocolate]

THEY NEVER KNOW (Chapter Nineteen)

This GIF is not mine……

Author’s note: This is my first time writing, so I hope you all will forgive my mistake and grammar too. I’m hoping for comments on my writing. Thank you…    

This story has taken little inspiration from Sehun web story “ Dokgo Rewind”.

I’m sorry, yesterday tumblr was not working, hence I couldn’t update sorry.

Summary, One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven(M), Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen, Sixteen, Seventeen, Eighteen

-Sehun pov-

Things were out of my hand. On my way to find my brother's killer, and I caught up with Choi gang. How? Jinwoo trapped by Junsu.

Jinwoo on his way back to my place after accepting Wang's leader another letter for me. Junsu somehow manages to convince Woo-Shik(Choi gang leader.) that Jinwoo has stolen their new drugs package. And asshole brings 10 of his members to hurt Jinwoo. Taeyong has reached to help Jinwoo. And Yuna informs me. It won't be a big deal, but they were actually waiting for me, why? Y/n comes up. How? Junsu knows about My/Sehyun and her relationship. And he challenges Woo-Shik to win Y/n, to be specific for one night. And I've learned, asshole doesn't play by rules. The good thing about Jaehyun, he never touches women without their full consent. He flirts, intimate but never go too further. And I think Wang leader is also the same. While Woo-Shik already has many harassment and three molestation cases too. He is an authentic evil. Y/n need to stay protected, I'll do it. If I'm not wrong, if Woo-Shik cannot get hold on Y/n, he would try to go after Yuna. I have to make sure Yuna also have someone around all the time. Or I have to convince Y/n, and Yuna stays together most of the time. It will be easy to protect also save time and energy for me, Teayong and Jinwoo.

I cannot neglect, it would be challenging when jealousy is involved. Y/n is jealous of Yuna for some unknown reason. Or maybe because I was Sehyun for her, for a while, and another girl has my attention bothered her. And sensing Yuna's current loving behavior toward me, she is also the jealousy of my attention to Y/n. Did I mention I miss my brother again because I want to run away from this situation? If not, I DO MISS HIM LIKE HELL.

Back to the point, when Yuna called me about Jinwoo, Y/n saw demon through my eyes. I ask her to come with me, know a bit whatever I and my brother associated with, where unintentionally she is also involved. I was frightened. There will be a fight for sure, bloody too. I'm sure Y/n has never seen any fight. I hope after seeing she don't be fearful of me. It is the last thing I need after her hatred.

However, I was hoping to find anything on Jaehyun. Or something related to Wang leader. I sigh and suddenly notice Y/n was staring at me. I give her 'What' look.

"You know this car is a gift from my parents. I didn't say, but I love my car." I nod.

She huff and said, "Then DIRVE SLOW. If anything happens, small or big, I'll kill you." I have to admit. I'm fearful of her. I begin to drive slow; then we stay in silence.

I park her car far away from my place. We got down of the car, start walking toward my home. Y/N stop and ask, "The guys we are meeting killed Sehyun?" I can hear angry and agony in her voice. "I don't know, nothing is clear," I answer her truthfully.

"What's up with these people?"

I sigh, "Y/n, these people are connected." I smile and continue, "This gang leader may know about Sehyun case. No guarantee. We're here because they have Jinwoo." She nod.

I reassure her, "Y/n whatever occurs trust me, you will be safe. I won't let any harm to you, ever." She gives me a sarcastic chuckle, "I know. Let's go." I wasn't able to say anything. We started walking toward the meeting point. In the halfway, I hold her hand in mine. Before she starts her protest, I said, "You are my girlfriend. Please just follow the act." She is mad, she tries squeezes my hand, tightly to hurt me. I wanted to laugh. How should I tell her, her soft hand cannot hurt me? Her every and very small act make my heartbeat fast. She continues trying to hurt me as we walk. While I hold hand with affection.

We reach the destination and my luxuriate feeling dies, seeing Jinwoo in knees, near some black car, beaten. Taeyong continues protecting Yuna with the teaser, who was trying to touch her. My blood boils, if I wasn't holding Y/n hand, I would have attacks second I saw it.

Woo-Shik sees me from inside of his car. As he comes out, everyone gets alert. Taeyong and Yuna coming rush to me. I didn't utter a word. Yuna understands my silent question and tells me she is okay. Taeyong nod. Jinwoo gets up and walks toward me. I let go Y/n hand, look at her, and smile. She looks confused. I turn toward Jinwoo, reaching to him, I exams his body a bit. Taeyong comes and takes him where Y/n and Yuna was standing. He makes Jinwoo sit on the ground. Yuna sits beside him too. Taeyong was coming to help me, I silently tell him no with eye contact. He gets it. Y/n was chaotic.

I turn back to Woo-Shik, he comes closer along with his company and smirks while saying, "Sehyun, long time." He looks toward Y/n "You have an attractive girl, I have to admit." Shamelessly staring at her, "So, here is a deal. Give me your girl for a week and I will forgive you and your friends for my drugs." I keep calm with a blank face. I was aching to rip off his tongue for asking Y/n like property, however, my angry won't do any good. He looks here and there, and snickers, "I know, I said one night, but look at her. I need at least a week to completely know her." People behind him were silently smirking. Like dog waits for his owner to complete meat and pass reaming born of it.

I took a deep breath, firm and gentle voice I said, "If I say no?" Woo-Shik smirk, go to his car, sit on the car hood, and orders to fight. Now I smirk, they don't know what is going to happen once the fight starts.

-Y/N P.O.V-

You don't know why, but your heart was beating fast as something unpleasant will happen. And way the Sehun was driving, your fear was increasing. You don't have any will to die with a car accident, it made you scold Sehun a little.

When Sehun holds your hands, you feel annoyance. His hand hold was like Sehyun, only Sehun's hand skin was rough. Not wanting to go back again, there. You clutch his hand tightly, to show your irritation with his touch. He didn't even flinch. It didn't pester, it was playful maybe. You keep trying hard to hurt him while walking, like a child trying to build a card house when wind continuously blows.  

You feel the change in Sehun's hold. It was gentle but reserved. You look up and see where you are. Yuna comes stands next to you. She gives you one, unsmiling look. Sehun let go of your hand. Surprisingly, you feel the loss of warmth, you were enjoying it.

Everything was confusing for you, and when the guy in brown start talking, you felt nausea. You didn't know if he was talking about you or Yuna. You know the fight will start, you have heard about it a lot Sehun's fighting skill too. But you never thought it would be like this.

It was hard for you to keep track, whose hand was moving, whose leg was. But Sehun was able to. You were okay until you saw a baseball bat, chains, and things you cannot name. Soon you saw blood. Sehun takes something metal thing from someone's hand and punches on his chest, maybe near to his chest, you don't know, but he fell on the ground in the worst pain and scream. Then a guy with the twisted wrist falls near your leg. You couldn't move, he was crying in extreme pain. Taeyong, push him away from you, harshly.  Your eye widened, fear, hard to breathe, heartbeats faster, and numb. You can only see blood and scream and hitting noise. Everything makes you remember Sehyun, you image his scream while getting beaten. You can imagine his pain, screams, blood. He was killed mercilessly. You couldn't see anymore, your eye was blurred with tears. Before you can forget the real world and see more pain, Taeyoung stands in front of you, blocking sight. "Hey, look at me. It is okay." He keeps calling you. You may not able to see but you can hear everything, clearly. Your mind was imagining Sehyun, while it makes you remember Sehun. You try to ask Taeyoung to go and help  Sehun, he is outnumbered, but words didn't come out of your numb frame. Your heart breaks thinking something will happen to Sehun too. You will lose him too. You wanted to know why, what, and how are things happen, you were losing your small world.

You want to deny your feeling. You want to lose your memory and have a new start. A new world, where there is no pain of losing people you love. Your phone was vibrating in your jeans pocket. With your numb hand, you take it out. Myung was calling, you couldn't pick up knowing your surrounding and your lost voice. You got a few notification asking, 'where are you?' and 'call back.' You have no idea how long you been staring at your phone. You look up when Yuna call Sehun loudly. And he was coming toward you.

-Sehun pov-

It got over sooner then I thought. Woo-Shik sneaks out while I was busy with others. I want him that most, he was my answer key but next time. I had a small cut near my stomach and arm due to shape knuckles besides that I prefect. I called Taeyoung to drop them in the hospital. I'm not a killer however I can kill if I want. I kept two of them in condition to drive. After helping Taeyoung put people in the car carefully; finally, I turn toward Y/n. I didn't look at her during the whole fight, not wanting the distraction. She was standing still with tears. While Yuna helps Jinwoo to get up from the ground. Me and Taeyoung go to them, I asked, if they are okay or not. I order them to go to my place and do necessity, I will be there in a while.

Y/n was looking at me whole while with widen eyes. I stand in front of her, two-steps away. I didn't speak to her, keep looking at my friends walking away. When I ensure they are okay and no one else is there seeking at us. I called Y/n. She didn't utter a word, keep looking at me from up to down. "I'm not going to hurt you. Don't be scared of me. Please." She was still. With all my courage inside me, I hug her. I know, she doesn't like me touching her. But she was shocked. To my surprise, she hugs me back after a few seconds. I can feel her getting better in my arms, warm feeling pass to my blood. She is not afraid of me. I pull her closer, she didn't protest. After a while, she utter, "Are you okay?" I assure her, I'm fine. She goes out of the hug. I thought maybe we will be friendly for now, but no, "Don't think too much out of my concern. I was worried for Sehyun's brother, not you." My heartbreak with her words, but I smile with a nod. We stand silently, for a while until we both got control. She starts walking toward, my place. I look at her in confusion. Before I could ask, she speaks, "I don't want to stay alone. I will sleep in the Sehyun bed."  We silently reach to my place. She didn't utter a word went to my and Sehyun's room without looking at my friends, like she owns this place. Taeyoung and Yuna's face turns sour while Jinwoo was lying on my sofa. I clean up his treated his wounds properly. I took a detail of Woo-Shik, what he said when he cames and stuff. Ask Jinwoo to rest properly and avoiding to talk about Y/n which my other two friends wanted. I clean up my wound while Taeyoung sets up a bed for everyone.

I went to my room, to change my clothes. Y/n seems to use my bathroom without asking. She was wearing my brother's hoodies and my sweatpants without asking. Eating my pack of chips, on my bed without asking. She sees me and casually says, "You sleep upper bed, I will sleep in down one." She keeps her half-eaten snacks on the table, drinks water, goes to bed, and orders, "Off the light." I was at the door speechless. I don't remember allowing her to use my house and things like hers. If Yuna has behaved like this I had scolded her but I didn't know what should say to Y/n. The person I love plus my brother's girlfriend.  I was busy in my thoughts, she called me again, "Sehun change, turn off the light and sleep. Aren't you tired?" I nod. After taking a shower, gone to bed, and slept.

Next morning, I feel good after a healthy and peaceful sleep. It was 9 am, I get down from the upper bed and see Y/n was still sleeping. I thought of waking her up, however, hearing her soft snore, I let her sleep.

When I go down, my friends were up and breakfast was also there. After breakfast, we start our discussion. Jiwoo was good, he didn't have anything major. I warn them for not starting the topic of Y/n's behavior. As per the condition, it was right to stay together. If Woo-Shik wouldn't have run away, we could have avoided it. Yuna was ready but seeing Y/n's unpredictable behavior, I don't know how to tell her; from today onward, me and my friends will be with her 24/7 when she couldn't bear me even for 24 seconds.

[impracticaldemon]

Interactions ~ The Ghost, Ch.4

A sequel to The Road to Tokyo ~ by impracticaldemon for Saichifest 2019

Words: ~ 1800  Rating: T (though the next chapter more likely M)

Read also on: FFN | AO3

Author's Note: This is Chapter 4 of the story The Ghost, a story that took on something of a life of its own (heh). This chapter was written for SaiChiFest 2019, which I am co-hosting on tumblr Feb 16-19, 2019. I hope you continue to enjoy this journey with Saitō and Chizuru.

@saichifest @nalufever @sabinasanfanfic @hidetheremote @eliz1369 @eheartangel @shell-senji @canadiangaap @soujthings @rainylune @kondo-hijikata @flower-dragon @hakuouki-or-hakuoki @annedey @chiire

Interactions (or, The Ghost, Chapter 4)

They hadn't talked about sleeping arrangements. Despite being officially promised to each other—and sometimes Chizuru wondered if she'd imagined that whole conversation—they hadn't really planned much about their future other than travelling to Edo—Tokyo—and moving into Chizuru's former home. She couldn't help but think that other couples probably did more planning before deciding to—well, start a whole new life together. It was probably strange that she wasn't more anxious about everything, but truthfully, the only thing she feared was losing Saitō again. Which led back to her current dilemma. She wasn't quite sure how to ask to share a room, but she didn't want to be on her own either.

Chizuru stole a quick look sideways. In the past, she'd always been running to catch up, or trotting along a half-pace behind. Today, not long after their shadows had lengthened and blurred, and cool afternoon had slid into chill evening, Saitō had taken her hand and drawn her closer, offering silent support just as her steps had started to drag despite her best efforts. Two long, hard years lay still lay between them, as yet barely touched upon, but he was still as aware of her as he'd always been. In the past, it had saved her life.

"Chizuru." Saitō cleared his throat. "It would be better—safer—that is—tonight…"

"Saitō-san?" It was difficult to read his expression in the half-light.

"Sumimasen." They had come to the small town where they planned to spend the night, and Saitō stopped in front of the first place that offered food and ducked within, releasing Chizuru's hand. She hurried in after him.

The proprietor looked surprised to see them, as well he might. Thanks to the business with the bandits, earlier, they were arriving over an hour later than originally planned, and certainly later than most travelers would care to be out, given the cold and gloomy late-autumn nights. Chizuru saw their host's eyes flick carefully over Saitō, and sensed his tension rise as he took him the unmistakeable shape and size of a sword. She'd gotten more used to that reaction over the course of the day, but she still didn't like it. Saitō took it in stride, and he also ignored the whispers of a small group of locals in one corner.

"Konbanwa," he murmured, bowing politely, but without conceding his dignity as a patron. "If it would not inconvenience you, could you please bring a meal, and tea? We were delayed on the road."

The man hesitated, and then bowed in return. "Of course, sir. I will bring the tea immediately, although if you would prefer sake, please let me know. I don't serve sake in an official way, but there's nothing to stop a man from sharing his own stock."

Chizuru was puzzled by the friendly offer, but Saitō simply nodded, and seated himself at the table closest to the door. He placed his sword on the tatami beside him and gave her a faint smile as she seated herself on his right.

"He will not charge me for the sake, but our meal will cost a little more. There is nothing unusual in it—it simply means that he knows those other customers well, and judges that you and I will not be here long enough to cause any trouble for him."

"I see." She gathered her courage. "Saitō-san—"

"Chizuru—"

She hastily gestured at him to continue, happy to defer asking her question regarding their accommodations. It still sounded overly-forward to her, although she'd already decided that any embarrassment was worth it to avoid leaving his side.

"I do not wish to presume upon our relationship," Saitō said carefully, "but I think it would be safer for us to share a room while we are travelling." Dealing with the host seemed to have settled his thoughts—he no longer sounded flustered. "I promise not to—to impose on you in any way."

"Oh—oh of course, Saitō-san! I'm glad!" In her relief, it came out all wrong, and Chizuru felt heat rise to her cheeks. "I mean, I'm glad that you won't leave me alone. And, um, I'm quite sure—that is, of course I'm not concerned about—about anything like that."

Saitō's expression shifted a little at that, and his eyes moved away from hers, but she couldn't tell what he was thinking. Had she offended him? She couldn't imagine how, and that didn't seem to be quite it.

In the end, the meal was decent, and as reasonably priced as one could expect in this time of short supply. Chizuru poured Saitō's sake with something very like wifely pride, and was delighted—no doubt another overreaction!—to see how pleased he looked at the small intimacy. It was endearing, and she had to look away in order to avoid displaying her feelings too openly for common courtesy. Eventually, the meal concluded, and their host had directed them to the inn recommended by Matsumoto-sensei.

The innkeeper had behaved much like everyone else: wary of Saitō, but courteous, and clearly somewhat reassured by Chizuru's modest appearance and demeanour. He relaxed even further when Saitō mentioned that Matsumoto-sensei had directed them to the inn, and asked quietly—and indirectly—whether the 'problems' besetting the Matsumoto family had been resolved. Chizuru was momentarily at a loss, but when Saitō replied that there were still one or two matters outstanding—most unfortunately—it occurred to her that an acquaintance of Matsumoto-sensei's would know the family's history as Bakufu loyalists. Some members of the extended family remained incarcerated by the Meiji administration in retaliation for their actions during the war.

After a few minutes, Chizuru realized that Saitō was becoming uncomfortable with the increasingly transparent questions about his experiences in the northeast during the war. Long used to trying to avoid prying questions, Chizuru didn't hesitate to feign even greater fatigue than she felt in order to bring the conversation to a quick close. She slumped a little against Saitō's side, and then blatantly interrupted the discussion with a sweet smile and a slew of rather incoherent apologies for her faintness. The innkeeper immediately escorted them to their room with an avuncular—if distressingly knowing—smile. Chizuru discovered that she didn't care and wasn't even embarrassed.

Once the man's footsteps had faded, Saitō surprised her by pulling her close and leaning his forehead against hers.

"Thank you, Chizuru. I—" His arms tightened around her, and although she couldn't see his face, she could hear the strain in his voice, and feel the tension in his body. She instinctively moved her head to rest in the hollow of his shoulder, and his embrace tightened almost to the point of discomfort.

Chizuru swallowed, suddenly overcome by a mix of concern and awareness of the way that their bodies seemed to touch at every point. Surely, she shouldn't be reacting like this when Saitō was in distress? But although she was genuinely worried, she could also feel her heart rate accelerate, and her body seemed to be growing warmer by the moment. She tried and failed to convince herself that it was because she still wore her coat, especially since the brazier was unlit.

"Saitō-san—"

Her words were cut off by a passionate, almost ruthless kiss. Heat flared within her as her beloved, once-mourned Saitō stole her lips and her breath, and left her trembling. Amazing how rational thought could vanish in an instant… She twined her fingers in his indigo hair, and felt his hands caress her back and waist and hips, while still holding her so close that it seemed she could feel every muscle in his chest and stomach and thighs. Her blood was pounding in her ears; she was gasping for air—or maybe for more of his lips and tongue and teeth. When he pressed his mouth to her neck she heard her panting breath change to something like a groan, and it shocked her back to some slight awareness.

How had she thought him calm? How had she missed that he felt this way—although she hadn't really, not since their first real kiss, in his guest-room at Matsumoto-sensei's. His body betrayed him, and she would have blushed if it had been possible to become any redder. And she… her voice held desire, she could hear it, and didn't know what to do.

"Chizuru." Of course, he stopped, mastered himself, shoved her away from him almost as abruptly as he'd kissed her in the first place. Of course. His voice was rough, but controlled. "I'm sorry. Please… forgive me. I want to deserve your trust, and I swear I won't… go farther."

"But—"

"We need time—both of us—I know that."

"But I—"

"It is fine. I'm just sorry… I did that." His breathing was almost normal again, and she couldn't see him well by the light of the one lantern.

"Saitō-san!" They were both a little stunned at the irritation in her tone.

"…Yes?"

"I wasn't complaining."

"I know."

"Then don't apologize as though there was something… wrong… with that… with us feeling like that." She really was embarrassed now, and it was starting to seep through the combined passion and annoyance. In a more level tone, she added, "I told you before—I'm not a child."

She heard him sigh, felt his arms around her shoulders again.

"I know."

"I… didn't mind. Not really."

"Chizuru. We can do better—I can do better—than this. Just"—he laughed softly, at himself, and at her—"stop thinking that I'm… not aware of you… in that way." The kiss he pressed to her bruised lips was gentle, but full of love.

"…I think I understand. But don't treat me as though I don't feel the same way." She tried to make her voice sound firm and grown-up, but in truth she was glad to have a bit more time to get used to this new relationship, this not-quite-the-same Saitō-san.

"I won't—I'll try not to. It's just easier sometimes… You are very beautiful to me."

She stretched up to kiss him, savouring the experience—of the kiss, of being away from any self-appointed guardians, of being wholly her own person. Of being with the man she loved.

They slept with their futons pushed very close together, and that was enough for today. Who knew about tomorrow, though?

[END]

A/Note:

 Less drama, and no bandit attacks, but I felt that these two are bound to be trying to figure out their relationship on several levels. After all, Chizuru thought Saito was dead until just a week before. And Saito is a very cautious man, who just spent almost three years immersed in a hellish war, including almost a year as a prisoner of war. At the same time... they're roughly 21 and 25, they've been deprived of each other for close to two years, and (in my headcanon) they're both starved for physical affection. So hmm. Plus, they have to try to interact with the world around them. As always, your comments are very much appreciated. I apologize sincerely to those who were kind enough to comment on the last chapter (or Teachings of Demons) that I haven't gotten back to. I'm working on it! ~ I