#guess how many times i've been asked to cook for the family? 0 they are Scared of what i'd make

[gideonisms]

Every time I read one of those tradwife articles I'm so happy and excited to get up and work my boring manual job that pays me just enough to live and then go back to my own apartment which I rent and sleep in my own bed alone. Yet another satisfying day of pushing 30 with a career that is going nowhere 👌

[guqin-and-flute]

I've got this very important question, because you are making the best ratings I've ever seen. 10/10 So... Who sings/plays the best lullabies?

[Ahh, thank you! OH!! LOVE THIS IDEA YES this is very important. I’m going to add in what their voices are like because I’m a singer and I want to. This is less from the kids POV and just how I headcanon it, though the kids help with the scoring]

[More Than Just] Uncle Rankings

Jin Zixuan: His family wasn’t...big on lullabies. Or music. Or bedtime routines. Or creating memories together. He got a few songs from various nannies, but it was never anything super consistent that got carried over for him to use in fatherhood. It makes him very...uncomfortable to sing and he can’t quite put his finger on why. Would be a salvageable, mellow tenor if he tried--which he doesn’t. It doesn’t bother the Jin kids at all, they’ve got lots of other musical relatives! Their dad tells the best stories anyway.  0/10 Does Not Compute

Jiang Yanli: She likes to hum idly when cooking or playing with the kids, knows little Teaching Songs for different lessons and animal songs. Sings happily to any of the permutation of children are currently under her roof--niblings and all. She has a vast library of songs that she knows and they’re different from the ones that the nannies or the Lan might sing because she’s from Yunmeng. Sometimes, she gets choked up in the middle of one and has to stop (and maybe not sing it again) because it was one of Wuxian’s childhood favorites. Soft, gentle 1st soprano, not a lot of vibrato. Sings from the heart and is very comfortable with it. 10/10 Songbird Extraordinaire, Makes Up For Unmusical Husband

Jin Guangyao: Will hum or half sing under his breath when he braids his loved ones’ hair, when he’s not really thinking about it. Strangely reticent to sing if people are just looking at him; it feels too honest and vulnerable. If the lamps are dim or if A-Fu is tucked to his chest or the boys have their eyes closed, he will do it. Knows some of the same songs that Yanli does, though many seem to be more melancholic and about longing. One song is the boy’s favorite, because he can fit their names into it--a song about being brave and being smart and becoming all you’re meant to be. A-Fu ponders as he grows older and learns more about music, that the lines don’t quite rhyme like they’re supposed to--almost like there’s a different name that’s supposed to be there. Melodic, clear tenor, refined and controlled. 10/10 A Mother’s Musical Legacy Lovingly Passed On

Lan Xichen: Will use music as a way to soothe, entertain, educate, focus, you name it. Sings, hums, plays the flute and guqin. Set out to learn a few of those Teaching Songs from Yanli once he became a parent, knows quite a few lullabies from his mother, and has a practically perfect memory for songs--if he hears them once or twice, he now knows them forever. Will sing for any of the children when they ask, but is humble as a good Lan is about actually Performing for anyone outside his family. Many an evening ended with a pile of children being carefully divvied out to their guardians from his lap, sides and general vicinity after he patiently sang them to sleep. Warm, husky baritone, genuine and quietly captivating. 10/10 Melatonin In Musical Form

Lan Wangji: Everyone knows about the musical proficiency of the Lan and of the Twin Jades in particular. What everyone might not know is that Lan Wangji will sing his son to bed every night in a soft, low baritone/upper bass. It’s one of the things that begins to set A-Fu at ease with him early on when he starts to stay the night, occasionally, because he can hear the affection in his voice that his face doesn’t quite convey. He will hum as he rocks them if they are upset or scared from a nightmare and frequently plays the guqin as a backdrop to their play times. Both A-Fu and A-Yuan can hum Inquiry long before they know its name. Also has a nearly perfect audio memory. 9/10 Musical Messages On Demand

Lan Qiren: Does not know the same lullabies as his nephews--they came from their mother. Does NOT sing. This makes A-Fu disgruntled, though he accepts gentle, traditional Gusu songs from the guqin in the next room as a substitute to fall asleep to whenever he has to stay over. 3/10 That’s Not What I Asked For But Fine, I Guess

Nie Mingjue: More of a hummer than a singer, a little tone deaf if you ask him to sing with an instrument, but his voice is not bad, just unpracticed. Bass, kind of gravelly. Tends to make up repetitive little runs that are more of a soothing distraction than a song he knows, as he doesn’t have an ear for them. Game to make up nonsense songs when A-Fu was younger and wanted a lullaby about rabbits when he was at the Unclean Realm--as he didn’t actually know a song like that, he made it up on the spot. It was basically just speaking rhythmically with very imaginative words; ‘Rabbit, rabbit, ra-ra-rabbit, rabbit, rabbit, hop hop hop.’ Hey, the kid fell asleep, so it couldn’t have been that bad. 4/10 A Valiant Attempt Was Made

Nie Huaisang: Loves singing! The only drawback is that he wants to sing what he wants and when it’s vetoed, doesn’t really have the patience to argue, just says, ‘Okay! Good night, then!’ Usually likes ballads or tragic love songs that A-Fu and A-Ling are bored stiff by. A-Yuan, on the other hand, listens intently and asks questions about them after, like, ‘Did they ever see each other again?’ And that’s the story of how Huaisang made him cry at bedtime because, no, she stayed a statue for the rest of time and he wept on her every day until her face was worn off from the river of his tears. Oops. Respectable tenor with reasonable vibrato, sounds much like his speaking voice. 5.5/10 Fun and Educational, If You Like That Sort of Thing

Jiang Cheng: Nope. He does not sing. Will not do it. Ever. Could be a strong, driven tenor. But aggressively isn’t. 0/10 You Didn’t Even Try

MianMian: Knows songs from all over, but not many lullabies. Sings story songs sort of like Huaisang but they tend to be more energetic and less melancholy and so are overall received much more enthusiastically. She rarely is around for bedtime, even when she visits, but she can be coaxed into a song or two before the bedtime routine is started with parents/aunts/uncles. Strong mezzo-soprano, energetic and without frills. 7/10 Now That’s A Story I Can Get Into!

Wei Wuxian: Comes in kind of late for the kids wanting lullabies from him, but he knows a few drinking songs he can share and definitely knows a few rude songs that he is happy to sing for them--maybe a little sooner than their parents might appreciate. Is also the type to sing little nonsense songs about things that are happening around them, whether it’s teasing someone or just because he’s bored and wants the world to know he is chopping up potatoes. Is actually pretty skilled at just playing Chenqing like a regular flute as well and has started impromptu child dance parties on more than one occasion. His voice is solid, lower range tenor that likes to belt instead of croon. 8/10 Music Man--76 Chenqings Led The Big Parade

Wen Ning: Like Wei Wuxian, comes in too late for comforting songs and isn’t honestly that much of a singer. Will hum under his breath absentmindedly as he does things with his hands, but they aren’t really songs as much as random bunches of notes and jumps if anyone catches him doing it. The kids don’t really need him to be a good singer--they like him for other things! Like how he can crush rocks with his bare hands or toss them really high in the air! Mid-range tenor, not too confident or supported but not unpleasant. 3/10 It’s Just Not His Thing, And That’s Okay

[zu-is-here]

Hi Zu! How's the first day of freedom? The live stream was fun yesterday! And the art I'd great XD you really made me laugh!

I also saw your response to my last ask and I guess I didn't really explain my comment about pizza shops like sweet shops, I can explain that now if you wanted?

Anyway how are you? What you been up to?

Hi Gayfish! Aw really busy XD yet very good, thanks! <3 I'm so glad to hear you enjoyed both heheh, and that was so nice to see everyone, thank you for coming and staying till the very end (〃ω〃)☆

Ah yeah! I didn't even expect it, that was a real surprise :D Why do they consider pizza a sweet??

Great as always, bought presents and cooked for Easter tomorrow, gonna paint eggs soon *^* How was your day? ♡

UPD:

Wow (°▽°) So that's how it works! ☆ What kinds of pizza did you try? *^*

Oh sure I do <3 So many places and even more stories... Being late for classes in a French lyceum, praking Spanish neighbors with doorbells, getting lost in other cities, — it feels like another life but it's the current one ♡ What about you?

Yep, thank you! <3 We bought some kulich, chocolate eggs and Easter decoration, and just painted (colored?) the eggs! (that's why I was distracted, sorry >3<)

OH– so you boil white eggs, pour the food coloring with vinegar and boiling water and lower the eggs for a few minutes so that they acquire color *^* Tomorrow we'll choose our fighters aaand let the battle begin heheh! (òwó)

Awww congrats to your parents! <3 Such a busy week for you and your family *^* And what a British picture indeed heh– Hope you didn't get wet or cold! (ówò)

Oh yay!! (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵) Wait– I just realized, there are no more quarantine restrictions?? *0*

To be honest I've never heard about Jeff the Killer or My Immortal, what are these about? (ﾟ∀ﾟ)

Good luck with drawing!! ☆ and take your time <3

So yummy! Cannara is the one that's topped with onions only, right? It does look nice and if it tastes good too,,, must try!! *3*

Oh no– is it even possible to eat salty pasta?? Blep (">3<)

Hard to choose the favorite one since each place is special ☆ But you know, there's no place better than home sweet home <3 and for you?

OMG— how did you flood the hotel bathroom?? ( ・∇・) And what's the story with your boarding pass?

Actually it doesn't taste as good as it looks like cause it's soaked in rum and full of raisins xd but the frosting on top is worth it~

Oh Helluva Boss?? How's the new episode? *^*

No patterns and things for us though many do these with more creativity \(//∇//)\ but all these eggs are gonna be broken in the end ;3;

For so long! *0* Hope they'll celebrate twice and even more! <3 As for the restrictions, yay freedom is coming! ☆

Wow,,, that's terrifying yet intriguing (ﾟωﾟ) Gotta look into these ones, thank you!!

Same here <3 Oh do you have aerophobia? Then that's really brave of you to travel this way! *^*

Oh my– thank god It ended up well, lucky you! (ﾟ∀ﾟ)

Ah guess you're right! These ones look similar (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵) I don't like dried fruits either, but the icing with sprinkling is so sweet and nice it's literally melting in your mouth!

I haven't seen these yet but gotta watch ♪

YAY EGG FIGHT!! I lost in the first round today pfff XD

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom, season 3 episodes 3-6 thoughts!

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-johnny was actually pretty civil with danny and left when he asked! thats nice. also, SKULKER?? HAD A FRAMED PICTURE OF EMBER?? oooo fuck wait had they established they were a Thing Before?? I dont think so. thats weird. its like that country boy/goth girl meme lmfao. I think i am going to choose to ignore this new info and pretend I didnt hear it. 100% unrelated to the jazz/ember fanart I already drew and posted....😳

-LADIES NIGHT EPISODE THIS IS WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT. wish it didnt really center around the guys or them being pissed at them, but. willing to bet this was written by men lol

-THEY ERASED ALL THE MEN??? meanwhile, jack and danny are fishing at. silent hill or something. im glad jack is trying to read a parenting book and making an Attempt. (theyre at lake erie, but, they made it actually eerie...thats fun)

-the girls alt outfits...cute. EMBER MADE A NEW SONG TOO!!! kinda. jazz being one of the backup singers and being AWFUL. NOOOO

-'how are we going to get kitty to blow a kiss?' 'she'll have to think there are still some males in town!' ...i dont know how to break it to you, but I dont know that a 100% het girl would wish for all men to Begone. I think. I mean im not a het or a girl so I dont really know for sure. she Is probably Bi tho. esp having the other ladies in town chanting NO MEN!!! excitedly............(then again, the kiss is to get Rid of men, so, she probably would have blown it at the ladies only if they were actively trying to attack/stop them, so...I MEAN. THE DRESSING LIKE DANNY BIT WAS SO EXTRA)

-I feel like an all female cast ep couldve been way way way way cooler than that was. like. why was it still somehow all about Men. ...anyway. (where was valerie...)

-next ep opens with the observants, and, way way more of them than I expected...existed? I mean I guess them being a council/jury of some kind is what I expected from their first appearance (bc at that time they were basically TELLING clockwork to kill danny, not asking,, so I figured they had SOME kind of authority) but. there were so many. anyway, here goes vlad! letting his own hubris go brrrr. releasing a weather ghost for political gain! #justvladthings

-okay say what you will about him (he IS an asshole) but having an umbrella with his own face on it and more prepared to share is SUPER FUNNY. and him being fanned by huge wads of money by his bodyguards. SO ineffective but so Dramatic. He UNDERSTANDS that if youre rich you need to be. you know. obnoxious and kinda eccentric about it! fuckign hate when rich people are boring about it. I would trust vlad with nothing except to not be a boring rich asshole who wears...fucking khaki or some shit. man knows his Presentation Skills. and that 'V' chair in his mayoral office. is that fucking embroidered?

-maddie get your MAN PLEEEEASSSE. IM SO EMBARRASSED FOR HER. the way jack stays simping for this man. in FRONT OF HIS WIFE!!!! ...my god its like a love triangle. jack clearly loves vlad, who loves maddie, who loves jack. jack fenton is at the very least bi, right................. this is an OBSESSION . 'THE V MAN COMETH'???? i...my god. (also, on a serious note, to have a friend THIS SUPPORTIVE...and still be SUCH A DICK TO HIM (TRYING TO KILL HIM AND STEAL HIS WIFE??) NOT COOL VLAD. JACK IS YOUR 1 AND /ONLY/ HYPE MAN. if someone loved and supported me THIS HARD...LIKE. CMON DUDE.

-STOMP the fucking GAS, JACK

-this would make a great shirt design, looks like a metal band design! we love The Maelstrom

-oh, so vlad did in fact get a mansion in amity park. and its purple! good color choice! not as flashy as a CASTLE or MURDER CABIN, but still pretty eccentric, which I appreciate.

-...vlad knows the difference between picasso and da vinci? in the ep last post where we were watching him fail at conquering every historical time ever he didnt seem to know history well enough to like. be effective...was vlad taking art history at college?? (was he an art MAJOR??? we never DID KNOW WHAT HE WENT TO SCHOOL FOR. I kinda assumed business because in the masters of time ep he was still rich without ghost powers so he had to have..known something about business or something, right...but also, art and or theater FITS HIS PERSONALITY. possibly also something science-y, I guess, but I always felt like he got roped into that, esp how pessimistic he was about the ghost portal in the flashbacks to college, like, i felt like he was just there for maddie and was uninterested/un-invested at the time...)

-THIS GHOST JUST ELECTROCUTED MADDIE (THE CAT) BITCH!! THATS MY FAVORITE MADDIE!!! vlad going after vortex and being ~shocked~ .....WHEN. WHEN WILL YOU LEARN. THAT YOUR ACTIONS. HAVE CONSEQUENCES!!!

-the way this random man with a camera sees the mayor laying in an alley covered in TRASH AND DECIDES TO TAKE A PICTURE HAHAH

*snap* this ones going in my cringe compilation!

-vlad 'if we're going to defeat vortex, we're going to have to do it together!' *immediately dips after dropping danny off in front of vortex* JKASDFHKJHJKN

-DANNY CAN DUPLICATE!!! ...he couldnt even attack with it, but he DID IT!!! INTO (4) OF HIMSELF!!! SO PROUD!!!!!!!!!!

-'THE ROLLER COASTER EMOTIONS OF A TEENAGER THREATEN MY PLANS!' ...0 self awareness of his own dramatic moodiness. incredible, how dumb this man is. its very close to circling around to endearing, if he was less of an asshole. at least its very very funny to see danny shooting him with tiny lightning bolts anytime he's even slightly irritated! vlad you should be nice to danny anyway. this is what you GET

-...making sandwiches and ice cream and playing video games with your nephew is a totally normal thing. WHY is vlad acting like this is the end of the world. if you were a GOOD UNCLE YOU WOULD ALREADY BE DOING THESE THINGS!!! bitch I make my nephew food all the time and dont forget what he does and doesnt like. if u didnt know danny didnt want tomatoes, thats on u. if u, a grown adult, are gonna piss of the 14 yr old by not letting him win, u deserve to have to pay for the arcade machines he ruins because he now has uncontrollable storm powers because YOU THREW HIM INTO A FIGHT WITH THE STORM GHOST. fuck u vlad. paypal me $400,000 while ur at it tho. (also, gamer vlad confirmed)

-VLAD CAN COOK THOUGH???! I assumed he had...people working for him that did that. I mean. billionaires usually dont do that. then again, we've only seen those vultures working for him (and I guess the dairy king was AT his old mansion, but it was never really clarified if he worked there...I think he probably just Hung Out and they Enjoyed Cheeses Together. thats what I think, I dont think a KING would be working for anyone and also the dairy king was nice <3) but then again he would be a private person and we cant have anyone accidentally finding Ghostly Things, so...still, that's hilarious. pour one out for that really cute banana split that got ruined 2 seconds later

-vlad just fucking picking danny up and THROWING HIM AT VORTEX TWICE WITHIN LIKE A MINUTE. JUST ABSOLUTELY LAUNCHING HIM. BITCH THATS MY SON BE CAREFUL!!! HES GOT ORGANS AND THINGS!!!!

-danny seeing those animal commercials and feeling sad is the biggest 2000s throwback so far. i legitimately had to change the channel or walk out of the room when those came on bc id CRY AND BE SAD ABOUT THEM FOR DAYS AFTER. fuck those commercials and fuck that IN THE ARMMMS OF AN ANGELLLL song 😭

-'vlads ego almost got the town destroyed!' yes danny thats the entire episode. the entire series anytime vlad shows up honestly. this episode was just him being really embarrassing the entire time, and, me laughing about it. 10/10 would laugh at him again

-NEXT EP WE HAVE A SHAPESHIFTING GHOST?? I've said it before but shapeshifting is the power I would want when asked those 'what superpower do you want' questions...its the Best power! this guy looks like a homestuck character. ive never read homestuck but thats the vibe

-I love every time we see tuckers family, they are by far the most functional family. and dash has a lil chihuahua!!! named pookie!!! i am crying (I've had 3 chihuahuas, so I am very biased, but...) AND HE WATCHES THE ROMANCE CHANNEL WITH POOKIE. POOKIE I WILL DIE FOR YOU YOU SWEET LITTLE BABY.

-danny can lift a bus! I shouldn't be surprised, but i am proud of my son. hes got lil kid fans. i am going to cry about this

-JAZZ KEEPS A SCRAPBOOK WITH DANNY'S LIL HEROICS AND NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS!!! we've actually seen it on her floor before, but I didnt realize it was a scrapbook!! thats sooo cute.

-...and danny has to stand there listening to his parents saying danny phantom sucks and is a 'filthy ghost' and calling him egotistical...i am once again stealing their kids!

-THIS GHOST RIPPING JAZZ'S SCRAPBOOK!!! ILL KILL YOU. SHE WORKED HARD ON THAT!!! BITCH

-yes, maddie, the one with red eyes is For Sure Actually Your Son. ignore the, red eyes... (CLEARLY she hasnt watched the other 2 eps where danny has been evil, she doesnt know red eyes= evil!!!)

-'billy fenton'.......................

-danny being stuck as phantom in his own house, no way out is a fucking NIGHTMARE. his parents pointing giant weapons against him and SHOOTING AT HIM. THIS IS A HORROR MOVIE.

-NINE INCH NAILS POSTER.

-this is the most screenshot of all time

-amorpho turning into mr. lancer because hes 'someone no one will want to be around' BUT HES WRONG, I WOULD BEFRIEND AND HANG OUT WITH MR LANCER SO FAST.

-tucker dressing as danny, now I have the full Tucker set of him being sam and also being danny. also saying 'the ghost...uh...RIPPED MY FACE OFF.' and then running. SMOOTH. NOT AT ALL CONCERNING TO ANY PARENTS.

-sam accepts the toast from jack. and then 2 seconds later is like 'why am i eating this.' THIS SHOWS HUMOR IS SO UNEXPECTED SOMETIMES ITS REALLY GOOD. and then the scene after, mr lancer running into his ghost doppelganger and being like 'YOURE GORGOUS' THEN FAINTING. I AM CRYING. AND DASH FAINTING TOO.

-sam disguising herself as danny again to help tucker run from the fentons. but leaving him shirtless in the streets. incredible. 'plEASE DOnt NOTice MY FACELessNESS I MUST LIVE IN EXILE' this episode is destroying me the humor in this show is exactly my brand of corny and cheesy

-the impromtu story made up by danny and amorpho to explain stuff to the fentons. my god they are both such bad liars. but amorpho is a good egg. wish danny wouldnt have said he didnt wanna see him in town again!! I want him to be reoccurring. not that thats gonna matter since I'm almost done with the series, but the idea of this being the Only Time We See him is :(

-NEXT EP SAYS STARRING MARK HAMILL??????!!! hello ! mr . joker....mr. star wars.... I feel like I should be. idk. taking off a hat im not wearing in respect. I shouldnt be surprised tho bc hes in a lot of cartoons as a very good voice actor, and dp has already had a lot of talented ones so I've been looking out for ones I might know, but....mr. hamill....

-sam has her own greenhouse, names all the plants, and says thank you to them (in the languages from where the plants are from) whenever she harvests from them. thats SO cute. and her lil gothy lunch box...

-and danny's lil red fuzzy lined jacket!!! ive said it before but every time the characters get alt outfits im like :D

-danny has ice powers now!!! THATS WHAT FROSTBITE MEANT. HE KNEW SOMEHOW WAY BACK THEN

-THIS SHOW NEVER LETS YOU FORGET VLAD IS A BILLIONAIRE, HUH.

-danny's lil 'holy hibiscus!' first off the 50s batman swearing is hilarious. 2nd. my username is from the flower sanchoyo hibiscus, so, shoutout to ME this ep. hi :)

-EURGH UNDERGROWTH MAKING EVERYONE PLANT ZOMBIES. HIVEMIND PLOTS SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME. and this dude made the city SO overtaken so quickly like how long was danny asleep?? oh god

-evil fucked up sam! now the whole trio has gone evil at some point! the voice actress did a really, really good job with making her sound like a zombie...

-frostbite's paws are so so so big compared to danny. oh my god. i want to hug the snow dog...

-the far frozen has an advanced medical stuff!!! very cool. very smart snow dogs

-im so glad danny has a friendly ghost snow dad to explain this new power and teach him!!! this is so sweet. DANNY'S GHOST SENSE WAS A PART OF HIS ICE POWER?? OOOH. COOL. we love a training montage!!!

-danny saying if he cant defeat overgrowth, that he'd want to stay with frostbite...oh my god...do you think this is the first real supportive adult figure in his life (I am NOT counting his parents because they threaten him on the daily even if they dont realize it.) I mean mr lancer is a Teacher, but he was also nice but this is different, but this is a GHOST WHO IS WILLING TO HELP HIM with his powers and also will help him when hes injured and is so so nice and comparatively so much more mature than 90% of the adults in this show!!!! god. dad frostbite is my everything.

-the framing and lighting this episode, and all the angles...they went all OUT and it looks really really good. this is my nightmare scenario, tho. like, FUCK zombies and dead city zones and hivemind shit. and using the humans as 'nutrients for the children' i am going to THROW UP.

-MALEFICENT VIBES WITH THE HORNS AND GREEN EYES! this costume kicks so much ass. sam is now mark hamills daughter, I guess.

-danny's ice powers making his eyes blue!!! thats neat. and him going for the roots underground was SO SMART. i will not stand for danny ever thinking hes stupid, hes SO smart.

almost done with the show... :"( thats a sad thought!!!