#got harrow the ninth'd by my own brain ??? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

oidheadh-con-culainn · 6 months ago

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i fucking hate having memory loss. i've reconciled to missing large chunks of 2015 but i lost 5-10 minutes of today completely and it's fucking me up. it's gone. totally wiped. i remember the beginning of the conversation and the end of it but i couldn't tell you a single thing that was said in it, not even the general vibes, and it was a conversation i was pretty invested in having and i know WHY my brain yeeted it (it was processing a lot of info at that specific moment, i'm tired, it was between two different moments of stress/stimulation, pain) but. it feels bad. it's always really scary to reach for something you should know and find it's completely gone, leaving a void behind. like that was today. I was fucking there. where is it. why don't I know what happened

#got harrow the ninth'd by my own brain ???#what was i even talking to this person about !!! god !!!#all i remember is them offering to get me a cup of tea at the end of the conversation #that's it. nothing else. what the fucking fuck #now what do i do when i next talk to them!!! what if i say the same thing again and they think i'm insane!#i mean i am. objectively not mentally healthy. given the memory loss #BUT #personal #brainweasel hotel #and by large chunks of 2015 i mean. most of it.#I've reconstructed some of it from pictures though

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