#geese aren't even that good smh

[glassdoll4429]

INTRO POST

Main blog of:

@aries-is-a-ghost

@sunset-scout

@duck-club

Call me Doll.

Trying to figure out how to beat the cost of living before I have to deal with the cost of living.

I won't be answering any asks that have anything to do with donating. I don't have a bank account. I can't donate nothing. And I don't know if they're spam. I'm sorry to all of the people who aren't spam but I don't want to risk it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

Current Obsession: Doctor Who (Next episode: The Doctor's Daughter)

I like:

- writing (poetry and stories)

- talking

- drawing

- memes

- gomens

- Doctor Who

- The Doctor

- @goblinnick

- the marauders

-Sirius black

- reading (fiction)

- getting A's on half-assed assignments

- DUCKS DUCKY DUCKY DUCKY CUTE LITTLE DUCKY DUCKS SO FECKING CUTE

- people

I don't like

- Assignments

- people

- GEESE

- reading (non fiction/long posts)

- Science

- People who like geese more than ducks ( @goblinnick)

[cocolacola]

hellsing pokemon au !!

as promised, im going back to my usual hellsing shenanigans with some pokemon stuff. ive had this in my brain for months but have never gotten around to doing anything with it! my autistic ass has absorbed information about pokemon before i could have normal thought patterns, so hopefully my takes are at least a little satisfying. feel free to interact with ur own thoughts and suggestions!

i provided long explanations of each, but if you dont want to read all that just look at the pictures :P

long post ahead!

note: these aren't definitive teams, just me throwing around ideas. don't take this as the holy grail of headcanons or anything.

seras victoria

boltund would be her first pokemon i think, her main partner from before her work with the organization. togetic is here because idk im a togetic 4lifer and im a kinnie ? it just really made sense to me, just vibes, plus i think she really needed a flying type. may become a togekiss later, that would be cute. umbreon is pip's eevee that she evolved, and blastoise is a gift from walter. i think she needs more red pokemon to match her color palette and vampire vibes so ill probably add to this!

alucard

alucard needs a legendary of course, so darkrai. i think they would be good friends, they give the same "misunderstood tortured soul" vibes. houndoom to represent baskerville, noivern to fit the vampire/bat aesthetic.

and an important distinction:

i think girlycard should have a hisuian sneasel. they're the same critter. two ancient beings.

sir integra

im surprised with how much i struggled with this one. i feel like a fake fan. smh, anyways. sirfetch'd is perfect to me-even the unevolved farfetch'd is super fitting too-but i included the final form for this post. i wanted to stick with galar pokemon, but aegislash is literally a sword. cmon. stoutland is a recommendation from a friend that i 100% agree with. ive always associated her with the serperior line, so snivy was probably her starter. i think that'd be cute. im really open to suggestions on this one because i think she deserves more steel or normal types.

pip bernadotte

this is a big one! there were so many good options with pip... and i didnt even mean to color code it 😅 i wanted him to have an electric type to match seras (to add to the whole rivals-to-lovers aesthetic), so his main partner is raichu! it was between that or mudsdale, who i also really like (and is the only one on this team who cant be found in kalos, haha). i wanted him to have a bird (for the geese) so there's dodrio. scrafty and tauros just fit the vibe perfectly to me-they're sorta like honorable mentions. eevee is originally his but he eventually gives it to seras, who evolves it into umbreon. if pip would have kept it, i think it would have evolved into sylveon (the whole kalos thing).

walter c dornez

some interesting picks for walter. corvisquire is his main guy, his "angel of death", he's raised it from a rookidee since he was a kid. maybe it would evolve into corviknight when he becomes Dark Walter. not sure how that would work. i choose not to think about dark walter. bisharp is there for the steel typing vibes as well as the chess symbolism: it really hits right for me, with walter's arc being about how he's played as a "pawn", in a sort of way. also a nod to a very dear friend of mine who loves walter and the pawniard line respectively. :) now, why leavanny, you ask? it learns string shot, of course! also because id like to think he would raise a sewaddle in his old age to help him with things around the estate.

..aaand im out of room for images in the post! i'll make a part 2 with some bonus thoughts + the iscariot organization if i feel like it. bye for now!

[edgygayguy]

Ok since you're apparently tall asf (and consider me envious I WISH I could reach my highest kitchen cabinets without a stepping stool) how tall is the ideal trump card? Is 7ft enough height difference or does the werewolf need to be on stilts? 🤣

Also while I'm here, got any favorite HCs for Hans and Pip you'd want to share?

Thank you for the ask!

No need for the envy, I may be able to reach far but scoliosis, chronic backpain and shoulder bones that pop as loud as a faraway gunshot is the price I pay xD

7ft is definitely enough, but 7.22ft (pardon my European ass using Google to convert this 😭) would be like, perfection. I'm a smol bean in the body of a enlarged Fran Lebowitz, I want a giant fucking boyfriend that will have to look down at me when talking. With time I've accepted it will never happen, but still werewolf boyfriends are usually tall af and Hans is no exception, always can dream right?

As for Hans and Pip headcannons, I don't have many and the ones I do have aren't very interesting 😭

Hans is very theatrical, as we know, and I always imagined him not really knowing anything about commanding, fighting, and military stuff in general past firing his guns (and kicking huge explosives without them detonating ig). So if Hans and Pip ended up in a fight Hans would just run around doing backflips and shit while Pip would try to yell at him what to do so he doesn't get hurt. I think it would be great in an AU where he joins the wild geese a bit before the events of Hellsing. I Imagine Hans just rushing head first into a fight, having something blow up in his face and Pip going through all stages of grief before he sees that Hans just turned into mist before the explosion. This one is pretty subversive because you'd imagine Hans being the more serious Captain and Pip being not that good at it (tbf idk what he wanted to accomplish by waisting all ammo and explosive they had when the Hellsing mansion was stormed, my dude if you know the vampires are hiding behind hills just stop spamming till they're out smh)

Not really a headcannon but the fact that they both have the status of captain - cute af, great dynamic, maybe if you disregard the previous point they fight who's the better one.

This headcannon is something that kinda goes for every supernatural Hellsing OC I ever made and Anderson. If both Captains were at the Hellsing manor and Alucard was being a "vampiric asshole" Hans would just decapitate him as some fucked up version of "shut up and go away >: (". Idk why I just find it so fucking funny.

Hans and Pip swap uniforms often. Not much of an explanation for this one, just think it would be cute as hell.

Idk why I feel like Hans would be very shy when he's with Pip around other people, at least for some time he would be the stoic cinder block merging with the background like he is in the anime, but after a bit he would soften up. No smiles in public untill the first month, it's not his fault that he's no whore 😔

Pip is obviously the more social one, so whenever they go anywhere he does all the talking, but doesn't pretend that Hans is just not there, he's just more like "yeah that's me and my mute boyfriend" but he'd definitely jokingly tease him with shit like "c'mon at least smile" or "What? You don't even know sing language now? Mal, mal mal..."

Pip is a rainbow pride flag kinda guy and Hans is a mlm pride flag kinda guy (if you know you know)

"Loup garou" is Pip's pet name for Hans, I swear it's cute but even though I've been learning french for two years I can't provide any examples 😭😭😭

This one is stupid and silly as fuck but, at least to me, the wolf-wolf form, ya know, the giant fucking dog form of Hans from the begging of his fight with Seras? Yeah that one. It's impossible that in it he isn't similar size to Baskerville. I imagine Pip riding him in that form like a horse. Just zooming. Like Alice and Bayard in the live action movie.

If you put Pip and Hans in the same room as Integra and Seras and hit record you would get the best "mlm and wlw roast each other" quotes (who am I kidding, only wlw roasting mlm)

Hans likes to turn into mist to sneak up on Pip, no matter how much and how often this happens he just thinks it's smoke from his cigarette

I can't think of anything else of value rn so this is all I got for now 😭. The next part is nsfw, so heads up.

Because Hans is a werewolf this is kinda inevitable, but in my mind Pip doesn't like the idea of sleeping with Hans in his werewolf form at all. Maybe he warms up to it later tho.

To compensate for that the most Pip does for him is pup play

They're both switches

And best for last

Pip will sometimes just leg cling to Hans like a sloth and that is it. He probably did it as a joke once and now made it a habit for some reason. I know it's not nsfw but this one is so random and idiotic I think it's best to hide it at the bottom KWKWKSSKWK

Now that that's over, thank you for the ask @nuclearforest, you're a treasure and a gift to this fandom