#gabriel rush <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[4natri]

Not an ideal date but works

[wrexwas]

Blackwatch Reyes & Strike Commander Morrison on Watchpoint: Gibraltar (Evening)

[fuzzywyvern]

little comic i've been working on over these past few weeks featuring zuzu, gabriel, and quinn: three totally brave and totally valiant knights! (in training)

[miinos]

simping over Gabriel and then I find out his VA is the same guy who did those Duke Nukem vids, and that one "hey babe" audio is such a feeling. such a feeling.

[brokendreamscreation]

The playful bravado does not fall on deaf ears, but the younger angel does not twitch in his numb, depressed expression. The joke of Lucid still teething tugs the corner of his mouth downwards. How could Gabriel be making so light of the tragedy? His draconic teeth pierced into his stomach and unleashed God’s Flame! Not only that but the holy fire gravely harmed Lucifer. The dragon lost his eyes for fucks sake!

Dark blue eyes flicked away from Gabriel’s face, not daring to move his face from those warm and caring hands. The hands that raised him, hold him, protect him. And how did Lucid repay his beloved guardian? With wrath: fire, claws and teeth. “…While it…won’t define me…It was still my actions, Gabriel. My teeth pierced your flesh, I used my cunning to set a trap and try to kill you, and it was my rage that nearly got us all killed.”

Hands limply fell back to his sides, the seraph taking a shaky breath. “My actions destroyed part of the Pentagram. Sinners and Hellborn surely perished. I put Heaven on the line with what I did. I could have started a full blown war, Gabriel! …And the worst…the worst of it, I…wanted to kill Lucifer. And I tried my damnedest to do so. And then you too when you tried to stop us.” Lucid begins to shake, losing the statues-esq composure as trauma and memories come flooding back.

“I. Hurt. You. Gabriel! I nearly KILLED Lucifer! I-I came so close to it. I-I-I-” As panic sets in, Lucid pulls away, a hand clutching his chest. Angels don’t need to breathe but he felt suffocating pressure. His halo flickers and vibrates low with growing distress. “I am no angel! I’m something evil and I tasted it and now I am tainted with it!”

✞ He knows something's terribly wrong right away, but it only makes him hug them tighter, entirely opposite to them, as if he thought he might be strong enough to just squeeze their broken heart back together.

Its when they talk does he pull away to look at their face. " Don't tell me you think I can't take it... " He jests with bravado, though carefully, resting his hands to his brother's shoulders. " Sometimes things don't go quite... smoothly... but, I am built ready-made to endure a little damage, my dove. I... think my only surprise is that you haven't quite outgrown teething on me. " He softly chuckles, still ever trying to get a smile out of them, in spite of humor being rare to himself.

But he raises a large black hand to pet their golden hair, for a moment just quiet, but eventually he sighs and continues. " ... None of what happened defines you, Lucid. " He hesitates to say what he feels-- because he knows they won't so easily believe him. He wants to say its not their fault. But he knows if he said that to himself he'd never accept it, never. Maybe its he who taught them to think that way. Maybe he regrets sharing bad habits. " I came from the infirmary because I wanted to tell you... that this, this heartache you're feeling now, this wish for harm to never happen... this is what will define you. "

[fuckyeahgoodomens]

Good Omens filming locations masterpost! ❤ 🐍😊 Part 1

I made a Google map containing all the locations, see here! :)

Part one contains Season One, continue here for part 2 and here for part 3 containing the rest of S1 and Season Two, also a bonus book mausoleum!!! (it is split into more parts because tumblr has a limit of images in one post :))

SEASON 1

London:

AC in Berkeley Square (S01E06) - Tavistock Square, London

Scene: AC swap back and decision to go to The Ritz

Availability (as of 2024): 7:30–21

Link on the map

Crowley in the pub (S01E05) – The Enterprise pub, London

Scene: Crowley drinking and meeting not quite corporal Aziraphale

Availability (as of 2024): Mon-Wed 12-23, Wed-Sat 12-24, Sun closed

Link on the map

Crowley on the way to the burning bookshop (S01E05) – Wardour Street, London

Scene: Crowley's Bentley rushing throught the streets of London

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

AC on the bus (S01E01) - Piccadilly Circus, London

Scene: Aziraphale and Crowley meet on the bus to discuss the antichrist, in the background the Piccadily Circus can be seen

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

AC at The Ritz (S01E01, S01E06) - Criterion, London

Scene: Aziraphale and Crowley at The Ritz in the first and sixth episode of the first season. It was actually filmed at the Criterion restaurant which since then has unfortunately been closed and now (2024) there is Masala Zone with unfortunately changed interier :(.

Availability (as of 2024): Mon to Thur 12:00-22:30, Fri 12:00-23:00, Sat 12:30-23:00, Sun 12:30-22:30

Link on the map

AC on the way to the manor (S01E02) – Whitehall street, London

Scene: Crowley with Aziraphale driving the Bentley to the Tadfield manor

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

AC leaving the St James's Park (S01E01) - Carlton House Terrace, London

Scene: The stars on which Aziraphale and Crowley leave St James's Park in Episode 1, Crowley tempts Aziraphale to lunch and they speed away

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

AC meeting in St James's Park (S01E01, S01E03, S01E06) - St James's Park, London

Scene: Aziraphale and Crowley's meeting in St James's Park by the ducks in the first season in episode one (about the antichrist), episode three (victorian scene) and episode six (the kidnapping)

Availability (as of 2024): 5-24

Link on the map

Newt meeting Shadwell (S01E02) – Between Westminster Abbey and Palace of Westminster, London

Scene: Newt meets Shadwell for the first time

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

The Bandstand scene in St James's Park (S01E03) – Battersea Park, London

Scene: The bandstand scene in season one.

Availability (as of 2024): 8am until dusk

Link on the map

Aziraphale stops Gabriel during his jogging (S01E04) - Battersea Park, London

Scene: Aziraphale stops Gabriel during the jogging.

Availability (as of 2024): 8am until dusk

Link on the map

'Crowley' outside his flat (S01E06) - Eastfields Avenue, London

Scene: The morning after the Apocaflop 'Crowley' coming out from his flat.

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

Dirty Donkey in 1967 (S01E03) - The Cat's Back pub, London

Scene: The interior of Dirty Donkey from 1967 where Crowley meets Shadwell for the first time has been filmed in The Cat's Back pub (the interior has been transformed into the 60s)

Availability (as of 2024): Mon - Closed, Tues: 5pm - 11pm, Wed - Thu: 4pm - 12am, Fri: 4pm - 1am, Sat: 2pm - 1am, Sun: 1pm - 11pm

Link on the map

Shadwell reports to Crowley (S01E03) – Best Cafe, London

Scene: Shadwell meeting Crowley in the present time.

Availability (as of 2024): street all day, the establishment itself seems closed now :(

Link on the map

AC talking about the Warlock's birthday party (S01E01) - Crystal Palace Park, London

Scene: Aziraphale and Crowley watching Warlock in the park with dinosaurs and talking about the birthday party

Availability (as of 2024): 7:30am - sunset

Link on the map

AC stopping in a cafe after the manor (S01E02) – Penge Cafe (then) / Antonella's Cafe and Bistro (now), London

Scene: Aziraphale and Crowley stopping to discuss how to find the antichrist after visiting the Tadfield manor, at the time of the shooting it was named Penge Cafe, now renamed to Antonella's Cafe and Bistro 

Availability (as of 2024): Wed-Sat 8:30-5, Sun: 9-5

Link on the map

AC watching Hamlet in 1601 (S01E03) – Shakespeare's Globe, London

Scene: Aziraphale and Crowley secret meeting in 1601 during a Hamlet performance

Availability (as of 2024): They open at specific times for tours and performances. See performances and tours on www.shakespearesglobe.com/whats-on/, for example 3 APRIL - 23 OCTOBER there's a 'Pride Guided Tour bringing to life the queer stories and characters from Shakespeare’s life and times.' :). https://www.shakespearesglobe.com/whats-on/guided-tour-pride/

Link on the map

Crowley after bringing down the phone network (deleted scene, DVD) – Trinity Church Square, London

Scene: Crowley leaving after he brings down the mobile phone network in the BT Tower

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

Heaven top floor (S01E04, S01E06) – Sky Garden, London

Scene: The Heaven top floor background windows were filmed in Sky Garden, we are seeing this at the scene where Michael shows Gabriel the Earth Observation Files and during Aziraphale's execution (though the scene itself seems to be filmed with green screen)

Availability (as of 2024): the access is free but needs to be booked beforehand at https://skygarden.london/

Link on the map

Stairs To Heaven and Hell (S01E01) – The Broadgate Tower, London

Scene: Aziraphale and Crowley go to Heaven and Hell through the staircase

Availability (as of 2024): The tower is open Mon-Fri 9-18 but there is a reception downstairs where these stairs are – I've visited twice and once they were okay with me taking picks of the stairs and once not. The stairs are thought well visible from the outside and pics can be taken that way.

Link on the map

Aziraphale, Tracy and Shadwell on a scooter (S01E05) - Cardwell Road, London

Scene: Aziraphale miracles Tracy's scooter to fly with them and Shadwell to Tadfield

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

Where Shadwell and Madame Tracy live (S01E02, S01E04, S01E05) - Hornsey Road, London

Scene: The residence of Shadwell and Madame Tracy. We see it in episode two (Newt arrives), episode four (Newt leaves for Tadfield) and episode five (shaken Shadwell arrives, customers for the seance arrive)

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

Aziraphale eating sushi (S01E01) - Red 'N' Hot (closed), London

Scene: Aziraphale eating sushi with a surprise visit from Gabriel

Availability (as of 2024): It was filmed in the Red 'N' Hot – a sichuan restaurant, but it has been closed (now there is another restaurant with different interior)

Link on the map

Some scenes has also been filmed in the West London Film Studios.

Hambleden:

Hambleden is the place where most of the Tadfield village was shot :).

Tadfield Square (S01E01, S01E03, S01E05, S01E06) – Square in front of the church, Hambleden

Scene: Crowley phoning Aziraphale to tell him about the Armageddon in episode one, Adam reading and Anathema with R.P. Tyler in episode 3, seen R.P. Tyler meeting those going to the airfield in episode 5 and Aziraphale and Crowley are drinking on a bench after the Apocaflop and waiting for the bus

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

Adam's house (S01E02 , S01E03, S01E06) - Hambleden

Scene: Adam Young's house (can be seen in several episodes)

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

The Them buying ice-cream (S01E02) – Hambleden convenience store, Hambleden

Scene: The store that The Them bough ice-cream from

Availability (as of 2024): Street all day, the store Mon-Sat 8-17, Sun 8-16:30

Link on the map

The Them planning to stop Armageddon (S01E05) - Hambleden

Scene: The Them returning planning to go to airfield and stop Armaggedon

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

Anathema's cottage (S01E02, S01E03, S01E04) – cca 2km from the Hambledon square

Scene: The scenes with Anathema's cottage (Jasmine Cottage) were filmed here, it can be seen several times throughout the series (like Anathema moving in, AC dropping her off or Adam visiting her)

Availability (as of 2024): street all day

Link on the map

Others in England:

Warlock's house (S01E01) – High Canons, Borehamwood

Scene: The Warlock's home was filmed at the High Canons Estate which is listed on National Heritage List for England

Availability (as of 2024): The High Canons Estate is currently privately owned and not open to public, the house is not visible from road.

Link on the map

Hastur and Ligur hand over the Antichrist (S01E01) – Holy Trinity Church, Penn Street

Scene: Hastur and Ligur give Crowley the Antichrist at the graveyard

Availability (as of 2024): the outside should be available all day

Link on the map

(continue to Part 2 :))

[glennrheesworld]

i know you write fluff but can you write more angst in this request.

both glenn and y/n are like dating, maybe even married. y/n is doing something when a guy comes and tries to kiss her and glenn comes rescue her.

if this is too much, you dont have to write this. you can ignore it if you want. thank you anyway :3

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐘𝐨𝐮~

genre: angst & fluff pairing: Glenn x f!reader summary: When you think you can't fight any longer, Glenn comes to rescue you. warning: cursing, SA, & mention of blood

a/n: sorry for not posting in months, I've been dealing with some personal stuff in life and it's taken a huge toll on me (not proofread/rushed)

A new survivor, David, had arrived at Alexandria two days ago and his presence did nothing but discomfort you. His eyes were always somewhere else, but your face and his inappropriate comments just made it worse.

Glenn knew about this, you having told him the second time it happened. You didn't want to cause any trouble, so you kept quiet after a while.

“Hey, pretty girl,” Glenn places a hand on your waist and pulls you in to press a chaste kiss on your cheek. “Mm, hey,” you smile at his affection.

You notice the leather gloves he wore, wondering what he was up to. “What are you going to do?” You ask him, pointing at the gloves he wore. His gaze goes down to the gloves, “Oh, I’m going to help Rick and Daryl unload some boxes Aaron found on his run.”

Just as he said that you hear Daryl’s whistle, getting Glenn’s attention as the gates close shut. The truck drove in reverse, backing up with a few boxes loaded in the back.

“Gotta go help now,” he presses another quick kiss on your lips this time, before turning to jog towards the group.

After seeing Glenn get to the others, you turn back to what you had been doing previously; pulling out weeds and dead plants from the little garden you grew. You dig into the moist dirt, carefully pulling out stems and leaves.

You continue doing this for a while before going to the back side of the house, grabbing the hose to rinse your hands.

Glenn and the others had finished unloading the boxes, carrying them to the inside of the church so Gabriel could take care of the rest.

With one hand holding the hose, you rinse the dirt off the other. You do the same thing to the other hand before turning the hose handle off.

The sound of a low whistle gets your attention once you straighten up.

Just as you turn around, you’re met with David. You feel your heart begin to race with nervousness as you spot the smirk plastered across his face; his eyes are filled with something other than friendliness.

“What are you doing all alone, sugar?” He swipes his tongue over his top lip.

“What are you doing here?” You furrow your brows, anger, and frustration washing over you as you glare at him. He wasn’t supposed to be back here.

He lets out a chuckle, a disgusting chuckle. “Aren’t you a feisty one?” He comments, deciding to come closer to you. The look in his eyes makes you shiver as you take a step back, clearly angry.

“Let’s have some fun, baby.”

“Don’t come any closer!” You ordered him, fists tightening at your sides.

David just smirks at the sight in front of him, without doubt enjoying how you looked, all terrified yet willing to fight. “Or what?”

“Or Glenn will fuck you up—” David’s hand pulls your arm, making you tumble flush against his chest. You could smell his nasty sweat and feel the dampness on his shirt.

You pull yourself back, your wrist still in his hand. Adrenaline runs through your body, attempting to swing your free arm at him, only for him to catch it with his other hand.

“Let—” you shake your arms, trying your best to set yourself free, “—go!”

David can’t help but chuckle, turning you around to push you up against the wall of your house. Your shoes squeak on the wet grass, the hose still on the ground.

Your eyes tear up, struggling to get yourself loose from his strong grip. The feeling of not being strong enough hits your guts. David was stronger than you and you know that. Still, something in you wanted to believe it wasn’t true.

And just imagining what he could do to you frighten you to the core.

“Not so strong, are you?”

He taunts you, disgust and fear settling at the pit of your stomach. You didn’t want to cry but hot tears were already beginning to spill. You could feel your vision blur as you turned your head away, not wanting to see his monstrous face.

David presses his body against yours, trapping your legs so that kicking isn’t an option. You tremble, your strong act now gone. “Please, stop!”

With quivering lips, you shake your head as his face is close to your neck, inhaling like a creep. You shut your eyes in fear, praying he would get off you.

His free hand slithers down to your leg as he then grasps your thigh. He gives it a rough squeeze before letting out a vicious chuckle. A laugh that makes your skin prick with goosebumps.

“Heh, I can’t believe I finally have you all to myself.”

He’s suddenly yanked back by his shoulder, someone turning him around. “What the fuck—” A harsh punch shuts him up quickly, enough to make him tumble back. Blood drips down onto the grass as David brings his trembling hands to cover his nose and mouth.

David lifts his gaze from the mess in his hands to Glenn. His eyes widened with fear and before he could say any dumb excuse, Glenn lunged at him.

You take a step back, face wet with hot tears still spilling.

“You piece of shit!” Glenn is on top of David, fisting the collar of his shirt as he throws punches at David’s face. It’s not long before Glenn’s fists are covered in blood. David’s face, on the other hand, is fucked up. Badly.

David grunts on the ground, unable to keep up with defending himself. Some people hear the commotion and soon Rick comes to stop it. He grabs Glenn and pulls him off David, the grass splattered with red specks.

Glenn stumbles back, eyes trained on a badly injured David. David’s nose looked broken, blood coming out his nose. His face was just stained with his own red fluid and with a couple of yellow-greenish marks.

You watched the whole scene unfold in front of you, a trembling hand covering your mouth. What just happened made it way more difficult to process. Your mind was racing, and the tears kept spilling.

Rick was trying to calm down Glenn, who was trying so hard not to lunge at David again. The look on David’s face was clear as day; he fully regretted what he did.

“Lay your hands on my wife again and I’ll kill you!” Glenn snarls at David, full of emotion. Within a few seconds later, Glenn is in front of you, eyes softened. And badly injured David is taken to the infirmary.

He holds himself back from touching you, afraid that he might frighten you. Worry is written all over his face, his eyes searching your tear-stained face. “Love?”

His voice is gentle.

Your lips quiver before you wrap your arms around him. He lets out a shaky sigh as you weep into his embrace. And he begins to tear up.

He tightens his hug, burying your face into his shoulder as he rests his cheek on top of your head.

Although you were shattered by what you experienced earlier, you were a bit more eased to know Glenn would always be there for you.

[oddinary4bts]

Chasing Cars | ch 12.5 (jjk)

☆summary: when your brother goes to study on a semester abroad, your life collides with his best friend Jeon Jungkook, who's coincidentally your roommate. Will you survive the collision, or will you crumble into dust?

☆pairings: brother's best friend!Jungkook x younger sister!female reader

☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI, some chapters contain mature content)

☆genre: forbidden love?au, college!au, slice of life!au, smut, angst (as usual a lot of it), fluff

☆warnings: curses, alcohol, depression, panic attacks, unaliving attempt (ish, last scene of the drabble, do not read if it's triggering for you). basically jungkook's summer and he's severely depressed and almost proceeds to end it

☆word count: 4.6k

☆a/n: okay so this is an extremely tough one to read. the triggering scene is the last of the drabble, and I put a warning before it if you want to skip it! and if you ever need to talk, know that I'm here for you <3. I really relate to Jungkook's pain in this one, and I feel like I did not transcribe it well to paper, but I want you guys to have the drabble today so here it is :') hope you guys still enjoy even though it hurts like a bitch

☆series masterpost

☆☆☆☆☆

If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol

☆☆☆☆☆

Jungkook counts his heartbeats. 

One, two…

Three.

He wonders if his heart will stop beating altogether. If the screaming in his head will mute, if the burning in his lungs will soothe away. 

Everything hurts, and it’s all his fault.

It’s always his fault.

His right leg bounces up and down, and all he hears is you telling him it’s over. Over and over again. 

If only he’d never made that promise to Gabrielle…

Nausea rushes in next, the taste of bile heavy on his tongue. The screaming intensifies, ripping his soul to shreds.

He lost you. He fucking lost you.

Not that he ever had you to begin with.

Tears threaten to fall, his vision blurring, but he blinks them away. He’s sitting outside on a park bench, the cool evening wind a caress on his features, yet he feels like he’s been dunked in an iceberg. He’s too cold, and his leg just keeps on bouncing up and down, up and down, up and down.

And his heart breaks and breaks, the screaming doesn’t falter, doesn’t quiet down.

He’s going to be sick. He barely drank yet he’s going to be sick. He doesn’t even dare close his eyes - all he can picture when he does so is you, and it breaks and breaks until he lets out a pained sound, hiding his face in his hands.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he curses, and he rubs his face, rubs his eyes, tries to chase the tears on your cheeks away from his memory.

But you don’t falter - you only become clearer. 

He lost you.

He should have told you he loved you before he left for Paris. Should have held you for a little longer - how could he have been so stupid?

The last time he kissed you… right next to the door. He barely remembers it. He should have known to commit it to memory. It’s already fading - the screaming overtakes the sound of your voice.

A tear slips free, and he dries it away. Like hell he’ll allow himself to cry when it’s all his fault. 

He was trying. He was trying to do what you wanted, and it backfired in his face. Regrets burn brighter than the sun. And now he’ll have to learn how to live without you when he barely had you to begin with. 

He straightens, sitting back against the bench. The leaves rustle in the wind, the moon shines on and on. Around him, it’s like the world hasn’t stopped. But it’s stopped for him - he collided with a wall at eighty miles per hour.

Can the screaming fucking stop?

He runs a hand through his hair, toys with his lip piercings, and then he gets up, hiding his hands in the pockets of his pants as he starts walking.

He’s lost. He’s lost in the city of love - how ironic.

He wants to scream, wants to punch a wall, wants to break down. 

He wants to fly home and hold you close and never let go.

But he has to let you go. Has to let you fly. Your decision makes sense - even if it wasn’t for Gabrielle, Jungkook knows it never could have worked. He knew it on Valentine’s Day when he couldn’t resist but kiss you after wanting you for so, so long. He knew it the moment you melted against him, tasting sweeter than anything he’d ever tasted.

Like poison, disguised to strike when he’d be defenceless.

And as he walks the streets of Paris aimlessly, Jungkook wonders if he’ll make it out alive.

It takes him an hour and a half to realize he’s just been roaming, slowly but surely getting lost. With no clue how to retrace his steps, Jungkook leans against the wall, eyeing a rat running on the other side of the street. He tries to breathe, but his lungs are crushed under the weight of what just happened, and all he can think to do is grab his phone to call for help.

To call for help, to call for the one person that caused it all. 

Gabrielle stops in front of him some time later, rolling down the window of her car. In another world, Jungkook would have teased her for driving a Porsche, for flaunting her money like that, but all he can do is open the door and crash in the passenger side.

“JK?” Gabrielle lets out.

He’s crying. He starts crying, and it’s weak and pathetic, and Gabrielle doesn’t say anything before driving away. 

The tears recede. They recede before they get to their destination, and Jungkook is relieved when he sees that it’s not the Air Bnb. That it’s some kind of fancy apartment complex, and he follows behind Gabrielle as she leads him up the stairs and to her apartment. She unlocks the door, throwing him a concerned look, and he waits until they’re inside before talking.

Before voicing the pain in his heart.

“It’s your fault.”

Gabrielle gulps. “Do you want to sit down?”

“It’s your fucking fault,” is all Jungkook manages to repeat.

There’s a silence, and Gabrielle kicks off her shoes before heading towards the couch. Jungkook doesn’t register the luxurious apartment as he follows her in - it’s like the edges of his vision are red, and all he sees is the one thing that made him lose you.

“What happened?” Gabrielle asks as he sits.

“She ended things with me.” Jungkook rubs his face. “Because you kissed me yesterday.”

New tears slip free, and Jungkook hates them. Hates the weight that they bear on his heart, on his shoulders.

“Who ended things with you?”

Jungkook leans back against the couch, shutting his eyes. And then you’re everywhere, and he sees Valentine’s Day. He sees your sparkly eyes in New York, he remembers how you used to hold him.

You’ll never hold him again.

“OC.”

Gabrielle sighs. “Putain, Jungkook. You lied about her.”

“I didn’t have a choice,” Jungkook whispers, unable to put the blame on you. “She asked me not to tell anyone, and then Tae was on Facetime with her yesterday and she saw us kissing and she ended things, and I won’t even be able to give her the gift I got for her.”

“Jungkook,” Gabrielle says, voice gentle and soothing, and Jungkook only then realizes that he can’t fucking breathe.

He’s hyperventilating. Everything burns and he can’t breathe - maybe you truly were the oxygen in his lungs.

“Deep breaths,” Gabrielle tells him. “Breathe with me.”

Jungkook feels his entire body freezing up, locking up. As if the thought of living without you is the predator, and he is just the prey. But he breathes with Gabrielle, feels the wave of the panic pass until he’s drained, his hands shaking slightly.

“Tell her, Jungkook,” Gabrielle says then. “Tell her everything. I don’t care if she knows.”

“I love her so much,” he confesses, and he’s crying again.

Gabrielle slides closer to him, and she rubs his back as he cries. It’s not as comforting as it should be - in the end, he still lost you. And Gabrielle doesn’t understand that he can’t tell you. That, even if he did, he still lost you. Because you never wanted Taehyung to know. 

That won’t change. 

It’s not like he can tell you anyway. Because what would Taehyung think, if you were willing to tell your brother? Jungkook would need to tell Taehyung about Gabrielle’s secret too, and he can’t do that to her.

Not when they were all they had growing up.

“You tell her,” Gabrielle repeats. “S’il-te-plait, Jungkook. Don’t lose her for me. Ça ne vaut pas la peine.”

What she doesn’t understand is, he’s already lost you. And he didn’t even deserve you anyway, not when he always fucks everything up. If it wasn’t for Gabrielle yesterday, he would have found a way to fuck it all up by himself.

No matter how much it hurts, Jungkook knows that you’re better off without him.

*****

Jungkook rereads the letter he’s written. He’s surprised he managed to keep paper free of the tears that have been rolling down his cheeks.

They’ve been staining his sheets instead, as he cries and chases your scent on his pillow.

He’s painfully aware that you’ve been sleeping in his room. The carefully made bed and the neatly folded t-shirt that you left on the night table are clear indications of it. And though Jungkook hadn’t planned on going home for the summer, the second he saw his room, he knew he had to go.

He can’t be near you. Not right now, when every single one of his breaths cut like shards of glass. So he decided to go home for the summer, to face the wrath of his family because at least that is familiar, that is something he can deal with…

He clenches his jaw hard, blinking away the sudden onset of tears. It recedes without leaving the confines of his eyes, and he manages to finish rereading the letter. 

He glances at the jewellery box on his night table next, and he dares to imagine what would have happened if you hadn’t broken up. He imagines your smile, your teasing when you’d realize he got you a gift. A cheesy one at that, but the second he’d seen it, he’d just known he had to get it for you. So he’d bought it while everyone was distracted by something else, hiding it deep in his pocket like you’d been hiding deep in his heart. So he imagines giving it to you again and again, your gentle laugh and light blush invading his thoughts. You kiss him to thank him, and he goes weak in the knees, because when doesn’t he go weak in the knees for you?

But life had other plans for you and him than the simple act of giving you a gift. Indeed, life decided distance was meant for you and him, and though he believes he might die from it, Jungkook just wants to respect your decision.

He gets up from his bed, knowing that he’ll never be able to leave the letter and the gift in your room if he doesn’t do it now. So he folds the letter, puts it in the envelope on which he already wrote your name, and then he goes to the door of his room. 

Taehyung and Ariane left to do some quick groceries ten minutes ago, yet Jungkook still makes sure the apartment is silent before actually stepping out of his room, heading down the hallway towards yours. And though it aches and burns and stabs and pains, he pushes the door open.

Your room is unchanged. He can almost picture the two of you tangling in your bed during the power outage, but he ignores the memories - they haven’t been doing him any good after all. He gently puts the jewellery box and the letter on the bed, and then he takes a step back. Stops in the door frame, eyes your room once again. He takes it all in, inhales the lingering scent of your perfume - the vanilla one that he was obsessed with - and then he closes the door on you, on his story with you.

It aches so fiercely that he tumbles back, almost falls, and then he heads to his room, to hide his face in his sheets hoping that the pain might finally recede.

It doesn’t. Especially not when Ariane and Taehyung come back, laughing together, reminding Jungkook that not everyone is breaking. It’s only him, and he assumes you too, though he tries not to think about that too much, because the guilt would eat him alive.

The guilt does eat him alive when he hears you coming home from work later, when he wakes from troubled sleep. He hadn’t meant to fall asleep, but then he hears your voice, and he remembers when you were whispering against his skin in the dead of night.

He doesn’t let himself break again. Instead, he packs his duffel bag, and then lies on his bed again. If only so that he can listen to you a little more before saying goodbye.

Jungkook startles at the sound of a knock on his door. He sits up, heart beating wildly in his chest as he dares imagine it’s you. But it’s not - it’s Taehyung, and they exchange a long look before Taehyung speaks.

“You hungry?”

“Not really,” Jungkook immediately replies.

Taehyung slightly frowns, glancing at the duffel bag, but he doesn’t say anything. He softly shuts the door behind himself to head back to the kitchen, and Jungkook sits there, the beginning of a panic attack starting to squeeze his lungs.

He hadn’t had panic attacks since he was in high school, but it seems that losing you has ignited them again, and he’s had a couple of them over the last few days. But he tries to remember to breathe, to not let it get to his head, and though it takes a moment, he eventually calms down.

He has to go. Has to leave before the panic truly seizes him and he dies.

He’s up and out of his room a second later, and though he knew he was going to see you, he freezes in the kitchen’s doorway. He just looks at you - you look tired, exhausted, and your eyes are just as haunted as his.

He doesn’t know what he says. Just tries to commit you to memory - your eyes, your hair, the way he feels naked and seen when you look at him. He commits your lips to memory too, and tries to compose a song with your voice in his head, something to listen to when  he’ll be gone. 

And then he turns his back on you to go put his shoes on. He hears Taehyung follow him more than he sees him, yet Taehyung remains silent until Jungkook is outside, the fresh evening air a soothing balm for the new panic rising in his heart.

“Are you okay?” Taehyung asks.

It’s not the first time Taehyung has asked since Jungkook lost you, but the answer doesn’t change. “Yeah, all good,” Jungkook lies, turning to face Taehyung.

Taehyung seems fully unconvinced. “You know, if you need to talk, you can talk to me, right?”

Jungkook almost wants to laugh, because that’s the last thing he can do.

“Thanks,” he says. “I appreciate.”

There’s an awkward silence, and Taehyung sighs. “I don’t know what happened with you and Gaby, but JK, please don’t let that fuck you up like this.”

“I’m okay,” Jungkook insists, pain and anger seeping in his voice. “I just want to go home.”

Jungkook is too much of a coward to hold Taehyung’s gaze, and his eyes drop to a spot on the ground between them.

“Well in that case, drive safe,” Taehyung says. “And text me when you get there.”

Jungkook nods curtly. “Will do.”

It looks like Taehyung wants to say something else. Especially as he glances inside, but Jungkook doesn’t wait. He turns around, walks down the stairs, and heads to where his car is parked. Taehyung doesn’t call his name, but Jungkook feels the weight of his gaze on his back.

And though part of him wants to, he doesn’t look back.

*****

Jungkook has always hated his father’s office. He’s never liked visiting JJS pharmaceuticals, and it hasn’t changed now that he’s a full-grown adult who should be indifferent to corporate buildings and tailor-made suits and the formality of his dad’s luxurious office. Yet, he’s still intimidated, still feels like he shouldn’t be here…

But this office will be his one day, now that he’s accepted to take over the company because Junghyun chose to start his own.

The office stands at the top of a skyscraper, offering a beautiful view of Manhattan, yet Jungkook doesn’t like it. He feels too far from the people down in the street, barely visible from such a height that he’s not even sure if they’re real or not. Like he’s disconnected - no wonder all the money and power have gotten to his father’s head.

Jungkook looks over his shoulder as the door of the office opens. To his surprise, it’s his mother walking in, and she dismisses her bodyguard as she heads towards him.

“Jungkook,” she greets him in that cold way she’s always reserved for him. 

He nods, turning to face the city again. “Mother.”

“I’m glad you have come to your senses.”

They were at the conference press earlier. Jungkook still feels like his eyes are burning from all the flashing lights, and his face still hurts from the fake smile he tried to keep on for the family image’s sake.

“I’m sorry?” he lets out.

“Though we are proud of Junghyun for his decision to start his own company, we’ve been worried about you taking over JJS,” she continues, entirely ignoring Jungkook.

He clenches his jaw, choosing to remain silent this time around.

“But then again, I think you just needed to have your eyes opened by that girl,” she adds. “What was her name again?” 

Jungkook’s heart feels like it’s been thrown in acid at the reminder of you, but he still refuses to answer.

“Nothing strengthens a man more than heartbreak,” his mother finishes. “Right?”

He takes a deep breath, knowing that he’s expected to answer this. “I guess so.”

His mother surveys him with that cold look of hers, slightly shaking her head. “We warned you about her, Jungkook.”

“What you said had nothing to do with why we broke up,” Jungkook spits. “Stop fucking bringing it up all the time.”

His mother’s gaze barely widens at the curse, and Jungkook hates that she’s so used to being disappointed in him that she doesn’t even say anything.

“In time you will see that I am right,” she says. “That… girl was just out to take advantage of you. It’s good that she’s out of the picture now.”

Jungkook’s heart breaks, like it’s been breaking since Paris. Like it’s been breaking every time you cross his mind. He never thought he could hurt so much - hell, he hasn’t slept or eaten properly since he came back to New York, surviving off of coffee and Buldak noodles. 

“If you ever say one more thing about her,” Jungkook seethes through his teeth, “I’m pulling out of the contract. JJS can go to fucking hell for all I care.”

He storms away. He doesn’t want to know what his mother has to say, just knows that he needs air and a glass of water before he collapses, the weight of his broken heart so heavy that he thinks it puts the weight of the universe to shame.

He truly has been breaking, shattering, crumbling to the ground. He never thought love could hurt so bad, but what is this pain if not the proof that he truly, fully loved you?

That night, Jungkook forces himself to eat a real meal. And though it tastes like ash, he reckons one day it might be able to overcome the taste of heartbreak that’s been lingering since he lost you.

***** (tw s**cide attempt-ish in this last scene, so please do not read if that is triggering for you)

Jungkook is drunk. He’s drunk and the city lies at his feet, the breeze fresh high up here. It plays in his hair, and he imagines it’s you instead. He imagines it’s your fingers, and that he can reach for you, if he dares to.

He takes a step closer to the edge, unsteady on his feet. Perhaps it’s the call of the emptiness in front of him - it’s so similar to the emptiness that has been his constant since he came back to New York and had that press conference. His mind is empty - there’s a hole where his emotions should be.

He’s a void. An empty husk, and two steps forward and he won’t have to deal with anything anymore. Won’t have to deal with his father calling him worthless - but hey, at least he’s talking to him again. Won’t have to deal with his mother calling him a disappointment, to deal with his brother ignoring his calls. 

Won’t have to deal with the guilt of losing you.

He’s alone, and lonely, and guilty and everything in between. It’s fucking eating him alive.

Jungkook takes a swig of the wine bottle in his hand, and then takes another step forward. He’s not allowed to be on this part of the roof - he had to climb over a fence to get here, and he still hears the sounds of the party in the distance. But he’s out of sight, and Lisa hasn’t come looking for him yet.

He’s on the edge of the roof. All it would take is a strong gust of wind, and he’d finally be free. But he doesn’t take another step forward. Not yet. Not when he remembers you - your smile is soothing the pain in his chest, and he holds on to it, if only for a moment.

His phone starts ringing, and Jungkook startles, dropping the bottle of wine. It slips off the edge of the roof, and Jungkook watches it as it falls and falls, and then explodes when it hits the pavement. It’s gore, his brain pictures himself there instead, and he takes a step back.

Jungkook grabs his phone. It’s Lisa calling, but for a moment, he lets himself imagine it’s you. He almost believes it - he’d pick up, and you’d tell him that you miss him, and he’d admit he almost texted you every day since returning to New York. But it’s not you - in this universe, you don’t even talk at all anymore.

“Hey,” he says when he finally picks up.

“Where are you?” Lisa asks.

He looks around. “Just on the roof.”

There’s a silence as Lisa moves away from the music on her side of the line. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.”

She doesn’t believe him. He knows she doesn’t, especially when she says, “Don’t move, okay? I’ll come find you.”

Jungkook nods. “Mmh.”

“But you have to tell me where you are,” she adds. “Do you think you can do that?”

“I’m on the roof,” Jungkook repeats, his tone flatter than the flatline that’s been echoing in his head since he lost you.

“Yes.” He thinks he hears her gulp, and then her voice is filled with panic. “Where are you exactly?”

“Ah,” Jungkook lets out. “There’s a fence on the roof. Climbed over that.”

“Jungkook…” Lisa trails off. “I’ll be right there in a moment, okay? Just wait for me.”

He makes a noncommittal sound, and just keeps looking at the shattered bottle down in the street. He has half a thought that it could have killed someone as it fell, yet he can’t bring himself to care. Not when a dark corner of his heart wishes it was him instead.

“Please stay on the line,” Lisa adds.

Jungkook doesn’t answer. Just listens to Lisa’s breathing as she makes her way to him. And then he hears the shuffle of her feet behind him, and he hangs his phone up, putting it back in his pocket.

“Hey,” Lisa says behind him. “Do you think you could step away from the edge of the roof?”

Jungkook shrugs. “What’s the point?”

“Please, Jungkook,” Lisa lets out. 

He barely recognizes her voice through the panic it holds, and he glances at her over his shoulder.

“What’s the fucking point, Liz?”

“Just step away from the edge of the roof and then we can talk, okay?” she says.

He clenches his jaw. “I don’t know.”

“Please,” Lisa says again. “I just want us to sit here and talk.”

Jungkook turns, and he sways. His heart lurches in his chest - for a moment, he thinks he’ll fall. But then he steadies himself, and he walks away from the edge of the roof, sitting next to where Lisa is standing.

She’s crying. He notices she’s crying and that, more than anything, breaks the dam inside of him.

“Holy fuck, Liz,” he lets out, and the tears finally break free.

Lisa sits next to him, pulling him in her chest as he cries, sobs racking through him. The pain is sharp as ever, a knife stabbing through his chest repeatedly. Everything hits him all at once - his family’s hate, his inability to control his own future, you… 

Yet the thing that hurts the most is the fact he lost you. Because he would have been able to live a life in hell if it’d been a life next to you but now…

Now he just feels lost.

“What’s going on with you?” Lisa asks through the tears that stains her own cheeks.

Jungkook lets out a bitter chuckle. “Everything. Everything’s wrong.”

“What happened?” 

Jungkook takes a deep breath, and then he confesses his love for you. Because it always goes back to you, and he wishes you were here with him instead.

“I was in love with OC,” he says. “You were right. But I lost her, and my family hates me, and I’m going to have to work for my dad and I just feel like life is so shitty. I’m so tired, Liz, you have no idea.”

“Jungkook…” she whispers, and her arms tighten around him, like she’s trying to hold his pieces together. “I am so sorry. And I know no words can truly help, but you are not alone.”

“I can’t even speak to Tae anymore because I’m convinced he’ll hate me,” Jungkook adds, and he wipes his cheeks dry. “Fuck.”

“You have me,” she whispers.

He hates it. He wishes she wasn’t there - some part of him wishes she hadn’t stopped him. Because he knows she has feelings for him, it’s always been obvious, and he’s only going to hurt her, too.

“I really loved OC…” he confesses.

“I know.” She runs a soothing hand on his back. “What happened?”

Jungkook tells her about Paris, keeping Gabrielle’s secret a secret, as he’s done his entire life. It makes him look even worse, he’s aware of it - how can he justify cheating on you without saying the full truth?

Simple - he can’t. Yet Lisa doesn’t call him an asshole. Doesn’t seem to judge him at all. No, she listens to him all night, clearly relieved that he’s not trying to jump off the roof anymore. And when she tells him she’ll help him find a therapist, Jungkook agrees. He agrees, because he’s tired of hating himself so much. He’s tired of everything, but maybe it’s time he tries to make it better.

If only so that he can live long enough to see you again. Because he wants to see you again. Wants to hear your voice again, wants to make sure you’re okay, better than he is. He likes to think you are - you have your friends and your family, and he knows they wouldn’t let you down.

By the time the sun rises, the flow of words that have been cascading from his mouth slows down, leaving him empty, yet it’s not the same. The void isn’t as dark anymore, like maybe there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. 

And though maybe he’ll break her heart one day by not being able to offer more than platonic friendship, Jungkook knows he’ll forever be thankful that Lisa stopped him from committing the irreparable. 

Read chapter 12 here!

☆☆☆☆☆

yeah so... I know it doesn't justify what he did, and the kiss with gabrielle but... my babie is broken and he needs a big big hug (and a lot of therapy so thank you Lisa for suggesting it). Feel free to talk to me if you need it <3

All rights reserved to @/oddinary4bts, 2024. Do not copy, repost or translate.

[allurilove]

OMG I LOVE YOUR YANDERE HUSBAND DRABBLES <3

can you write a drabbled about the time when reader is giving birth to Henry?

ily and bless you <3

Awww tysm!

Your husband prepped the hospital bag weeks in advance, and when the day finally came, he felt so proud that he was all ready to go. He yanked his car door open gently got you to sit and settle into your seat, and he helped you put on your seatbelt. He then rushed inside, grabbed the bag, threw it into the backseat, and he jumped into the drivers seat.

He plugged your ears with your headphones, and started to play classical music. You’ve been listening to that genre since the start of your pregnancy, all because he heard that it would make the baby smarter.

“Just relax, alright? I’ll take care of everything.”Your husband smiled, gently petting your head as you practiced your breathing exercises.

He started up the car and slammed on the gas. You could only hear the soothing sounds of the violin as your husband swerved in between cars, and when you slowly looked at him, you saw him lashing out at other “dumb” drivers.

When the music stopped, and there’s that brief moment of silence before it changed to the next song, pieces of your husband’s crude words filled your ears. “Go faster, you stupid-“

You clear your throat and glare at him. He glanced back at you, grabbed your phone, and raised up the volume of the music. Your husband gave you another innocent smile, before he started to drive like a maniac again.

You queued: “The Mission: Gabriel’s Oboe” by Ennio Morricone, Yo-Yo Ma, and Roma Sinfonietta.

When you made it to the hospital, you changed into the gown they gave you, and sat on the bed. Your husband slumped against the wall and watched as the doctors took care of the rest. He gave you his hand to squeeze, and he was too tired to register the pain from your tightening grip.

It took you hours to start pushing. Your husband curiously took a look downstairs, his other hand reaching for his phone just to take videos of the situation. After all, this baby was about to be the best thing that has ever happened to the relationship. But oh god, he started to feel woozy. He held onto your hand for support when he started to lose his footing, but he tripped on his own feet, and was knocked down onto the floor.

Your husband never wanted to be the man that fainted as his wife gave birth. He slowly opened his eyes, and when he glanced over…he could see the baby already in your hands. He groaned, mentally cursing at himself for missing the delivery, and he got back onto his feet.

The man was pretty embarrassed as he walked towards you, and he kissed your forehead as a small apology. He cleared his throat before he attempted to talk to you. “So uh, what are we going to name him?” Your husband glanced at the little guy.

“Henry.” You beamed, already confident in your choice.

“…Henry.” He muttered, testing out the name on his tongue. He then patted his pockets before he grabbed his list of names he made. He unfolded the paper and his eyes scanned the names. “I don’t see Henry as one of the names we both agreed on.”

“It just feels right.” You reply.

“You’re feeling a lot of things right now, let’s just lean away from the name Henry.“

You give him a look. “What’s wrong with Henry?” You then lifted up the baby towards him. “Doesn’t he look like a Henry?”

Your husband shook his head, his lips curling downwards. “He looks like a Frederick or Fred. Maybe, a Bennett or Ben. If I’m being honest, he’s looking pretty ambiguous right now.”

“But he’s definitely a Henry.”

“What about Harry-“ Your husband tried to throw that name into the mix but you shut him down. You were pretty set on the name Henry. You two didn’t have to follow the pre-agreed list of names that you guys already argued about for hours, and you were allowed to change your mind.

Your husband reluctantly agreed with you, and your new born was finally given a name. After you were able to recover for a couple of days at the hospital, you were free to go back home. Your husband was looking at the closet filled with baby clothes, already imaging what it would be like to start dressing him up. He had each drawer filled with outfits for every day of the week, and even the holidays! For Christmas, Henry could wear red pajamas with little reindeers and snowflakes on them. There was also a mini elf outfit, and of course yandere husband was going to dress up as Santa.

Your man was super happy as he stood by the crib. He peered down at the bassinet and he had a huge smile on his face. He just knew that he’ll get along with Henry. He could just tell.

[oofthwoods]

INTRODUCTION! ── ˙ ̟ the echo !!

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 :: get to know porsche's bet for the newest legend in the making in formula one, dubbed as the echo.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 :: i've been absolutely hooked in @disneyprincemuke vettel reincarnated's series and i have always loved fem!drivers so i decided to give my own take on this <3. | can definitely be read as a reader insert, but the driver will driver under a specific flag and related to a famous driver! even so, physical descriptions will not be given, so you can definitely picture yourself

our fem!driver has a few titles to her name! the most well known, echo, comes from her championship winning f3 & f2 seasons, where she was consistently the fastest driver in the grid, leaving behind only a faint trace of her presence for the other drivers to see.

other nicknames include "lightning" due to her great performances on wet races (as the media says, the only thing faster than the rain is the lightning.), "pg" (stands for both princess of the grid, which is an old karting nickname, and parental guide, given due to her young age), and the legacy.

she is the daughter of ex- formula one driver, rubens barrichello. she drivers under the brazilian flag. i picture her as the middle child, so that would place her date of birth between '01 & '04.

has a streak of four consecutive championship winning years: the italian formula 4 in 2019, freca in 2020, formula 3 in 2021 and formula 2 in 2022.

art grand prix girlie! has been with the french team for both her f3 and f2 seasons.

she was a red bull junior, but was suddenly cut from the team after her formula 3 season. helmut mark claimed that she wasn't consistent enough to justify a contract renewal, which was clearly bullshit as she had literally won the championship.

competed in formula 2 without an academy, but was in talks with porsche to join their team.

committing to her lightning nickname, she chose 95 as her number!

grew up in the paddock! her dad loved to take her around the world with him, and she became a familiar face to all crew and drivers. although she is the youngest of the current grid, she is closer to the oldest guys due to knowing them since she was very young.

outside of formula 1, her closest friends are gabriel bortoleto, felipe drugovich, frederik vesti, liam lawson and clément novalak.

within formula 1, she is closest to fernando alonso, lewis hamilton (both who met her when she was a baby), mick schumacher (her teammate at porsche), lando norris, alex albon and oscar piastri. but she is friendly with everyone, and tries to know them better — it does help that she is a social butterfly who could talk to the walls even if they don't answer.

about porsche: have been in the talks of joining the grid for a long time, and finally got their approval for 2023. they could go for veteran drivers but decided against it, placing their bets of mick schumacher, who had just been dropped from haas, and y/n barrichello, the f2 champion.

when the news dropped, it was the talk of the town! not only she would be the first female to compete in formula one in several years, but the duo barrichello-schumacher would be present again in the grid!

actually loves doing grill the grid and other challenges. some people think it's the rookie rush, but she has always loved playing those games.

has the biggest fat girl crush on susie wolff. would kiss the ground she walks if she could.

still needs a lot pr training due to amount of cursing and off-pocket things she says. apparently saying "i'll throw myself in front of verstappen's car and change the trajectory of his entire life" is not socially acceptable, neither is saying that she's plotting his accidental death.

sponsored by vivienne westwood, which she claims is probably the coolest thing to happen to her.

[wardenparker]

Bones Full of Words, ch 12

Javier Peña x plus size reader Co-written with @absurdthirst

“He pleaded so much that he lost his voice. His bones began to fill with words.” ― Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude

Javier Peña had no way of knowing for certain the American journalist he sometimes sees sniffing around the embassy for her stories is also getting information about the narcos from the same girls that he is. After Helena is brutalized by sicarios, it is that same journalist who comes to take her away and look after her -- giving Javi reason to pause and reconsider his opinion of the woman he had previously not considered as anything more than eye candy.

He has no idea that once she has walked fully into his life, he will be battling with himself over whether or not he should stop her from walking out it of again.

Rating: M for Mature but this blog is always 18+ Word Count: 13k Warnings: *Blanket warnings for this series: sex work, time period appropriate sexism, cursing, alcohol, food/eating, talk of weight or size, fatphobia, internalized fatphobia, self-esteem issues, canon typical violence* Fluff, sass, flirting, it's a whole chapter of domestic fucking bliss as displayed by two people very horny for each other. Summary: Booted back to the States after the DEA puts him on notice, Javi runs into an unexpected and familiar face at his cousin's wedding. Notes: Next week will be the epilogue for Javi and his writer, and then we will be on to the next soulmate story! Thank you so much to everyone who came along on this journey with us. It really has been so fantastic. 🧡 As always, I apologize for any errors I might have missed in proofreading.

Ch 1 ~ Ch 2 ~ Ch 3 ~ Ch 4 ~ Ch 5 ~ Ch 6 ~ Ch 7 ~ Ch 8 ~ Ch 9 ~ Ch 10 ~ Ch 11

There is no sinking, sick feeling like you expected. Only the knowledge that rolling over to dig out and light up a cigarette before talking will be something you share, skin to skin and heart to heart, with your soulmate.

"Alright." When you turn back into his side again you take a drag of the cigarette before handing it over to him. "Where do you want to start?"

Javi takes the cigarette and inhales slowly, eyes slipping closed as the nicotine rush hits him on the first puff. They can claim all they want to about cocaine, it’s not got shit on a cigarette. He holds it for a second before blowing it out. “I meant what I said.” He wants that written in stone, right now. “It’s not a heat of the moment thing, I love you.” He repeats softly, eyes opening and focusing on you.

"I've been in love with you since before I left to come home." You tell him softly, accepting the cigarette when he passes it back and embracing the intimacy of sharing it. "It hit me when I was living with you, actually..."

“When you were kidnapped.” Javi admits, watching as you take a slow drag off the cigarette and savor it just like he did. “I fucking nearly rubbed my - your tattoo raw, checking to make sure it was there.” His hand reaches for your thigh since you are still propped up and he squeezes it. “I didn’t think I needed to pile that onto you when you were so broken.”

"I needed to come home." That is an absolutely certainty. You needed to get away. To heal. And that never would have been possible if you had stayed in Colombia. "But I don't have the nightmares nearly as much anymore and I'm going a lot better. It's—it too a long time. But yes." Passing the cigarette back again, you have the good manners to look a little sheepish. "That's why I was so shitty while Elisa was around. I was jealous."

“Connie chewed my ass when she found out you were my soulmate.” Javi promises you. “I didn’t think that you cared at first. You were so adamant that our being soulmates was not an issue.” It had stung at the time, wounded his pride and hit at his ego. He had always expected his soulmate to swoon at his feet, or shit would be even easier than it was with most women. It was why he had bristled at the fact and inadvertently caused so much pain for both of you. He shrugs apologetically. “I’m an asshole.”

"I just don't think we were in the right place. Either of us." It's something that you've given a lot of thought over the years and you hope that that is abundantly obvious. "We were far too focused on our careers and couldn't see the forest for the trees. We didn't believe in balance." Sighing slightly, your eyes tick up again to find his and you bite your lip out of nerves. "I believe in balance now."

He chuckles quietly. “I don’t know if I have a job.” He reminds you. “But I know that I want you.” It’s something that has been obvious since the moment he saw you talking to Lorraine. You had appeared back in his life and he wasn’t going to waste a second chance. “What do you want?”

"You." This time you aren't hesitating. You aren't waiting and you aren't waffling. There is no path forward that doesn't include Javi now that he's back in your life. "Everything else is negotiable."

The cigarette is passed back to him and he flicks the ashes into the tray in the other side of the bed, twisting away from you for just a moment before he is facing you again. “We are settled on that.” He agrees, smiling softly in relief. “Now we just have to figure out six million little details.”

"Only six million?" You smirk at him and settle back against his chest again. "Piece of cake. Wanna start with the basics?"

“Which are?” He asks with a snort. “I’ve always thought two kids, but if you want more, I guess we can decide on a number.”

"Two is good." That smirk curls your whole mouth, turning your expression into a grin. "I was thinking more like...where are we going to live?"

“Well…shit.” He chuckles and the hand that isn’t stroking the little pooch of your stomach curls behind his head to prop it up. “That’s a good one. You want me to move to Rhode Island?” He asks. “I’m not too fond of the snow, but I’ll do it.”

"I at least want you to come up and meet my family." You bargain, turning your head so you don't blow smoke from your last drag back in his face. "If you get up there and decide winter is more horrifying than you expected, we can pivot and I'll come down here."

“Summer is shit here.” He points out, wanting to be honest. “It’s a million fucking degrees. So hot you don’t even want to fuck.”

"So it's either winter so cold you freeze when you try to fuck naked, or summer so hot you don't want to fuck at all." You snort in amusement. "Maybe we should move to the middle of California or something."

He curls his nose at that suggestion. “No California.” He huffs. “They are too fucking….Californian.” He doesn’t have a good reason to not like it, but he doesn’t. “Murphy said Miami wasn’t bad.”

"Hot and humid." Which sounds even better than hot on its own. "I don't know if there's a perfect solution, baby. We may just have to pick the one that has something we really love about it and deal with the bad parts that go with it."

“Texas is home for me and Rhode Island is home for you.” He muses. “So we just say fuck it and move to someplace we want.” He looks at you seriously. “Are you done writing? Permanently?”

"I'm done with journalism." That doesn't necessarily mean you'll never write again, but it means you won't be trotted out to rehash the most traumatic week of your life every single time anyone wants to talk to you. "Working in a kitchen has been good for keeping me busy, but I don't know if I want to do it forever."

“Why don’t you transition to a different avenue?” He asks seriously. “Your articles are better researched, plotted and presented than most books I’ve read.”

"I used to really like writing short stories." Tilting your head slightly lets you rest against him completely as you sink down under the blanket with him again and you shrug a little in his arms. "I could give it a shot. I can write in between restaurant shifts. It'll be easy enough to get a line cook job whereever we choose."

“If I don’t have a job with the DEA…” he sighs. “I’ve been offered a deputy position but I’m sure I could get on anywhere.” It doesn’t help make a decision, but he rocks you closer to his body. “But I should be able to support you if you wanted to do it full time.”

"Let's see if I can write anything good enough to actually sell." He's soft and warm and so comforting like this that you could just melt. "If you have a job offer here, let's stay here. There's plenty of restaurants in the area that I can work in for now, and your Pops is here."

“You would want to move here?” Javi’s surprised but he hums as he thinks about it. “There’s a little ranch down the road that’s about to go on the market.” He considers. “Owner died and it’s going through probate.”

“Didn’t we say once that Texans and New Englanders aren’t so different?” All of those early conversations with him are burned into your memory. Years later and you haven’t forgotten a single one of them. “I’m sure I’ll adjust in no time. Ranch, little house, whatever you think will work. You know this place far better than I do.”

“I think before we decide anything, I should probably visit your home, right?” He smirks slightly. “It would only be fair.” He wants to see where you grew up, meet your mother. Things that he had never really contemplated ever having to do, but now he is glad that you aren’t someone he’s known his entire life.

“It’s chilly but not snowy yet.” You promise him, smiling reflexively at the idea of bringing Javier home with you for a little bit. “Fall is the best time to see New England.”

He thinks about that for a moment and then nods. “When would be a good time for me to come?” He doesn’t ask if you want him to just come back with you, that might be too much.

“Well…” A soft laugh escapes you and your cheeks burn. “I’m going back on Monday morning. You could always come with me?”

“You would be okay with that?” His brow lifts in surprise. He had expected you to want to talk to your family first.

“I’ll call my mom tomorrow and let her know, but I don’t think she’ll mind.” You reach up to kiss him, reveling in the warmth of it. “She knows about you. My brothers…I didn’t want to talk about it much. But my mother knows.”

He winces slightly, knowing that by all rights, your mother should have a dismay opinion on him. “How bad should I expect it?” He tone is joking, but only slightly.

“She’ll be skeptical for about an hour after I hang up the phone with her, but if I’m happy then she’s happy.”

“If you want me to come with you on Monday, I’ll call the airline.” He promises, knowing that he owes you a lot more than just a potentially awkward first meeting with your mother. “What time is your flight?”

“Eleven in the morning.” Your eyes tick up to his, concern lining the edges of joy. “That’s not too soon? Too dramatic? We were literally just talking about where to live together and how many kids we want.”

“I’ll be on that flight.” He promises, leaning in and pressing his lips to yours. “Just gotta make sure D.C. knows how to get ahold of me.”

“I’ll write down my phone number for you.” A promise, as silly as it is, that makes the thing seem all the more real. “I’ve been living with my mom again. It’s easier.”

“Would you rather I get a hotel room?” He asks. “I don’t want to impose.”

“No.” Shaking your head, you feel a little silly for it but you’re certain when you look back up at him. “I want to have you with me. We’ve wasted enough time apart.”

“You are staying here tonight.” He agrees. “Hopefully your brother won’t be worried about you. You left without saying anything.”

“I should probably call the hotel and leave a message,” you admit. “Michael is protective.”

Javi nods. “Do you want to go get your stuff?” He asks. “Or would you rather me stay at your hotel?”

“We can go get my stuff in the morning.” Right now all you care about is snuggling into his side. “I’ll call tonight but I just want to stay here with you.”

“You looked beautiful.” He murmurs softly. “Today. Everyday really, but you looked really beautiful today.”

“Not every day.” The tendency to deflect compliments is long ingrained, but from him they make your cheeks burn.

“Every day.” He repeats, not letting you even doubt that for a second. “You don’t see it? You have this…softness. Even when you have to be strong. A grace and kindness that is bone deep.”

“Softness has always been my issue,” you gripe, though you wave it away. “I’m just glad the diet is working. But…it’s very sweet of you.” Fucking hell you’re bad at taking compliments. “I always admired your resolve, honestly. And attention to detail. Even when it frustrated me it was still impressive.” That grin returns to your lips full force. “The broad shoulders and cut jaw line don’t hurt either.”

There’s a few inches of skin on your side that Javi pinches gently in his hand as he frowns at you playfully. “I love this softness.” He growls, leaning in and biting the bottom of your lip.

“I’m glad.” You laugh softly, never doubting that he means it. Not after everything. “Because two kids will mean plenty of softness.”

“That’s if you want to do that.” Javi says seriously. “If you don’t, I’ll understand.”

“Three always felt like my mom was chasing us.” You hate it but you have to sit up again. Calling Michael’s hotel before you sleep is nonnegotiable. “But being an only child sounds lovely. Two is good.”

“Compromise, is that what it sounds like?” Javi snorts. “You are the one that says how many kids you have.”

“Can I ask you something else?” It seems like the time, considering how honest and open you’re being with each other. And considering what you’ve already talked about tonight.

“You can ask me anything.” He promises, looking up at you. The cigarette is long since smoked, crushed out in the ashtray, but the intimacy and lingering closeness still hovers in the air.

“I just wondered.” It feels silly, but considering where you were today maybe it isn’t. “If you ever wanted to get married? Or if Lorraine spoiled that for you.”

He sighs softly, looking up at the ceiling while he thinks about what he wants to say. “I figured one day it would happen.” He admits. “I knew I should have been happy to marry her, back when I thought she was the one. But something never felt right and I twisted that into believing it wasn’t for me, but I thought I would eventually find someone.” He looks back at you and licks his lips. “But I’d marry you.” He nods.

“I’m not talking about a wedding.” Clarification seems important in this moment, even when the gentle affection in his expression is so real. “A marriage is a life together. A wedding? They’re nice but I don’t think they’re necessary.”

“You wouldn’t want something like today?” He asks curiously. “Family and friends?”

“Not if you wouldn’t enjoy it.” That is what matters to you most. A wedding is a great party but only if the couple both enjoy it when it happens. Otherwise it’s just parading around for a day in clothes you’ll only wear once. “I guess what I mean is that I never envisioned a big white wedding for myself so I wouldn’t be disappointed not to have it. What I care about is having a partner to spend my life with.”

“I don’t mind a wedding.” He has thought about that quite a bit, especially after one particularly vivid dream of you in a white dress. It had haunted him for weeks after having it and it was the closest he came to calling you after you left.

“That’s the road to getting my mother to love you.” It’s both the truth and a bit of teasing, and you don’t mind that. Not really. Not when you know that these conversations — this compromise — is a big and new step for the two of you. The two of you. As a couple. “You brought up kids first and you’re the one who wants a wedding. You’ll be her favorite son instantly.”

He snorts. “I’ll make sure that I bring that up.” He jokes, even though he will follow your lead on interacting with your mom. “Pop will love you. And he thinks it’s funny as hell that you are just as stubborn as me.”

“The universe decided it would be cruel to give us anything less than a taste of our own medicine.” A taste that you deal with a gentle, loving kiss. “I should call the hotel. Before I forget or get distracted by my soulmate some more.”

“You do that.” He smacks your ass when you start to get up and smirks when you whirl around and glare at him. “Got a phone on the dresser.” He points out. “Don’t even have to get dressed.”

“Helpful.” You send that smirk right back at him and shake your head, then cross his room to make the call. To your surprise, your brother actually picks up when the front desk transfers you to the room.

“Are you okay? Where are you? I’ll pick you up.” Your brother rushes out, obviously worried when he came back to the room to find you not there. “Why the hell did you leave without saying anything?”

“I’m so sorry.” Turning back to look at Javi, you cringe apologetically. “But I’m fine. I left with Javier.” The man himself is lying in bed watching you with hooded eyes and you bite your lip. “I’m gonna stay here tonight and come get my stuff from the hotel in the morning, okay?”

“Javier? The guy you were kissing on the dance floor?” His voice ticks up in surprise but he’s relieved that you are okay. You are a grown ass woman, but your time in Colombia and him coming so close to losing you had made him a little protective. “Some chick named Lorraine was going around telling people that he and you are soulmates.”

“We are, Mickey.” The childhood nickname has been on the shelf for a lot of years, but your voice softens with affection — both for him and for Javi. “I had no idea, but your buddy Danny is his cousin.”

If you could see his face, you would laugh at him and call him a fish, mouth hanging open and eyes wide. “You— he’s your soulmate?” He asks, sure that he had misheard or you are yanking his chain. “Are you sure?”

"I'm sure." He must be in shock if he isn't teasing or needling you for details, but you can understand that. "Remember before the wedding, I told you he was from here? I wasn't specific. We're literally in his hometown."

“Jesus Christ, I didn’t put it together. I couldn’t imagine when you said Javier you meant Javier.” He frowns, trying to remember what the guy looks like, “He kind of looks like Burt Reynolds, right?”

You snort at the comparison but nod, not bothering to hide your giggles when you look right at Javier and agree. "Yeah, I guess he does kind of look like Burt Reynolds."

He rolls his eyes at you and flips you off, although there is a tiny edge of a smirk on his face. Burt Reynolds had done this pose on a bear skinned rug a few years ago, so Javi flips onto his side and cups his cock while he poses like Burt had while laying across the bed.

When you burst out laughing your brother grunts in confusion, and you have to dismiss it away quickly. "Nothing, nothing," you assure him through laughs. "Javi just flipped me off for the comparison." After a few seconds you calm down again, and shift the phone on your shoulder. "Listen, I'm...I'm gonna call Mom tomorrow. Javi's going to come home with us on Monday to meet her and see the old neighborhood."

“Wow.” He sounds impressed but he agrees. “Sure. I won’t say a word. I just came back to the hotel to change and check on you anyway. Be safe.” He tells you and then murmurs your name. “I love you.” He promises. “And I’m happy you are spending time with your soulmate.”

"I love you too, Mickey. Go have fun with your friends and we'll see you around noon tomorrow so you can sleep off whatever bullshit you get into with your buddies tonight." A round of good nights punctuate the phone call before you hang up and slide back across the room, ready to climb back in bed with Javier. "Lorraine was talking about us after we left," you tell him, smirking. "Everybody in Texas already knows we're soulmates, apparently."

He hadn’t expected anything less, but he shifts to sit up. “Does that upset you?” He asks. “Lorraine was probably trying to spin it, or claim some hand in us finding each other.”

"Baby, she can shout it from the rooftops and I'll just repeat it with pride." You climb onto the mattress and snuggle into his side happily. "I love you."

He softens, folding you against his side. His arm wraps around your back and hums happily. “I love you too, sweetheart.” He repeats back to you, feeling a long yearned for sense of peace as you lay with him.

******

"I know my mom is going to want to feed us as soon as we get back to the house but I swear I'm still full from breakfast." Groaning slightly as you get off the plane, you lean into Javi's side and sigh. Chucho had made you and the boys a big 'going away breakfast' before you left for the airport this morning and even though it was early, everything is bigger in Texas.

“I swear that I’ve never seen that man cook as much as he had for you.” Javi snorts as he shoulders the bag that you had wanted to bring on the plane. His own bag was checked along with your other bag. Guiding you towards the baggage claim.

"Dad used to do the same thing." Michael tells him, trailing just a pace or two behind. He pokes your shoulder and grins. "This one brings out the caretaking instinct in fathers."

“Pop was thrilled to meet her. And it’s been a long time since there was a woman in the house.” He smiles as he takes your hand. “He wanted to make a better impression than me.”

"I promised to take Polaroids while we're up here. He wants to see New England, too." Javier's father had taken to you immediately and without question, and you had relished the opportunity to warm up to your soulmate's father. "I think I'm going to put together a Rhode Island care package to bring to him when we go back to Texas."

“He would love that.” He had enjoyed watching his father fuss over you and how you had responded to the fatherly presence. It had been a long time since Chucho had someone to fuss over and you both seemed to enjoy it. “The man loves gifts, no matter how much he protests.”

“I am not above bribing my future father-in-law for his affection,” you half-joke, though just the sentence makes you feel warm and fuzzy.

“You don’t have to bribe him.” Javi promises. “He might have already put you in his will and written me out.” He had laughed when he had seen how thrilled Chucho was with you, although it had choked him up when the older man had pointed out how like his mother you are.

"Makes sense." The grin on your face is unapologetic, and you keep close to Javi's side as Michael goes hunting up and down the conveyor belt to find his own suitcase. "My mother will love you that much, too. We're just trading parental affection."

He chuckles. “He does know the luggage will come to us, right?” He asks, watching your brother in amusement.

“Impatience is a family trait,” you tell him, entirely unphased by Michael’s unnecessary pursuit. You’re used to it by now.

“I’m not even that bad.” Javi snorts and rolls his eyes. The past couple of days have included both interrogation by your brother and teasing. He hadn’t had the heart to tell the Marine that he’s done more intense interrogations than he would ever dream of.

Leaning into his side again, you put one arm around Javi’s waist and kiss his cheek. “The most patient thing anyone in our family has ever done was the years I waited to see you again.”

“Then I don’t know if I’m impressed or insulted now.” He teases, smirking when you pout at him and lean in to press his lips to yours.

“Be impressed.” You murmur, grinning against his lips when your brother clears his throat.

Javi glances over your shoulder, still kissing you and he smirks when he sees the way he’s shifting uncomfortably. Like it’s strange that you are kissing someone.

"Okay, I'm gonna go find Mom." He says finally, when he has shifted his feet enough times to catch Javier looking at him and knows he's being intentionally needled at.

Reluctantly pulling away from your soulmate, you snag your suitcase that has somehow appeared at your feet — Michael's searching probably — and thread your fingers through Javier's. "We'll all go, don't get your tighty-whities in a twist."

Javi spies his own bag and grabs it, throwing it over his shoulder. “We’re all set.” He promises, shrugging slightly at your brother.

"She said she'd be at arrivals with the car. We should be able to find her easily." You might walk a little faster out of enthusiasm, but that's alright. Your mother was already talking about what she was going to cook to welcome Javier to the family before you hung up the phone with her yesterday.

It’s amusing that you are almost outpacing him, picking up speed and he has to shuffle a little faster to keep up with you. “Excited?”

"Maybe." And you aren't apologetic for it in the least, inhaling the cool autumn air the second you walk out the door between the two men. It only takes a second of scanning the curb full of parked cars to spot your mother and you tug Javier in her direction immediately. "Mom!" She's parked almost all the way down, so you wave and hustle along with Javier and Michael laughing behind you.

Your mother looks like you, or – you look like her. Both of you falling into the hug like it’s been years rather than days since you’ve last laid eyes on each other. “Are they always like this?” He asks Michael.

"Yeah." Your brother nods, shifting his bag to his other hand. "Since she got back, anyway."

Javi sighs softly, knowing that some of that is his fault and he tries to not let the pang of guilt bring down the mood in this first meeting.

There is whispering between you and your mother, but it only takes a few moments before you step back and your mother is walking out toward the two men like a woman on a mission. Without a single second of hesitation, she wraps Javier up in a welcoming hug and holds on tight. "I'm glad to finally meet you." She says close to his ear, because there is no other place for her to speak.

He is surprised by the warm greeting, but his own arms lock around her and he hugs her back. “It’s my pleasure.” He promises. “You have one hell of a daughter.”

"Don't I know it." There is a smile on her face when she draws back, but her hands stay on Javier's shoulders and seriousness in her eyes. "Thank you for making sure she came home to me safely. From the bottom of my heart."

“I was going to at least give her that.” He hums. “Even if we weren’t together then, she was important to me. Her safety was important, and her happiness.”

"Okay, guys..." Wiping away a bit of silent water from under your eyes, you basically flail your hands at your mother and soulmate to urge them to save this heartfelt moment for someplace more private. "Maybe we should go back to the house? Before I get all choked up over here."

Your mom agrees and pulls back and reaches for the handle of your bag, but Javier shakes his head. “I’ve got it.” He insists.

"She said you were a gentleman." Your mother beams. "Come on, guys. Everybody pile in, I've got a lasagna in the oven and your Uncle Carmie dropped off wine last night."

He follows your lead and trails after you as you walk beside your mom, already chatting intensely and it’s interesting to see how open you are with her.

You pile into the backseat with Javier and let your brother sit up front, returning to that new habit you’ve found of leaning into his side whenever you are next to your soulmate. “The drive isn’t long,” you promise him, bucking your seatbelt just before your mother pulls into traffic. “Nothing is too far apart here.”

“That doesn’t bother me.” He has lived in cities and on the ranch where the earnest neighbor was three miles away. Both of them have their pros and cons and he is adaptable. If you wanted to live here, he would grumble when he shoveled snow but he would do it. Couldn’t be much different from shoveling manure.

“The old joke is that if you have to drive more than a half an hour in Rhode Island, that’s a day trip and you have to pack a lunch,” your mother jokes from the front seat. “I imagine Texas is a different animal altogether.”

He snorts. “You can drive all day and still not be out of the state.” He tells you. “If you only drive half an hour, it’s just a quick trip to town.”

“Exactly.” Your mother laughs, putting her attention back on the road. “We’re the smallest state with the biggest attitude.”

“I’m learning that.” Javi hums, winking at you and then looking back out the window.

******

It really doesn't take long to get home again, and you give Javi the complete-if-brief tour of your house ending in your bedroom. It's a huge relief now that you've redecorated since high school. Javi did not need to see all your old heartthrob posters up on the walls.

“She seemed to like me.” He sets your bag down and puts his own beside it, looking around your room. Honestly a little surprised that he has been put with you, he had expected to sleep in a guest room and have to sneak into your bed.

"That's because I was honest with her about the fact that I wouldn't have survived the kidnapping if you hadn't worked your ass off to find me." You take a second to dig out a sweater for an extra layer before tucking yourself into his side, but the warmth from him is better than the sweater you found anyway. "I figured we could tell her the rest together. But she knows you saved my life, Javi. Nothing could make her not like you after that."

"You would have survived." Javi is sure of that now. He might have been a hair's breath away from unravelling then, but now he is completely sure of the fact that you would have found some way to escape. "I know you would have. You are so much stronger than you give yourself credit for."

"Who knows what would have happened." Exploring the possibilities was important in therapy, but the fact is that he did save you, and you will forever be grateful to him for that. "What matters is that we're both here now."

“We are here.” He smirks. “In your childhood bedroom.” He will definitely be making a few fantasies that he’s entertained since planning this trip come to life.

“That doing something for you, hermoso?” The twist of his lips and raise of his eyebrow isn’t just teasing anymore. You know that look now. It’s a promise.

“Have you ever fucked in here?” He asks, voice dipping down lower, something he’s discovered makes you wet. His arms slide around your back and his groin presses firmly into you. “Or have you just fingered that pretty cunt in this bed?”

“Fuck, Javi—” You have to swallow the rest of your groan so you don’t get carried away, but your arms are up around his neck instantly and you all but purr in his arms. Squirming has the added benefit of rubbing your torso against him and you grin when his smirk flickers in arousal. “No, I haven’t fucked in here yet. You offering?”

“’Course I am.” He snorts, making his cock twitch on purpose. “We can unpack later.”

“Defiling my childhood innocence first thing?” The leering look in his eyes is tinged with sweet affection, though, which makes you grin. “I like it.”

He chuckles, tilting his head to press his lips to yours, enjoying that soft welcome that comes every time. You lean into him, want him just as badly as he wants you and it’s quickly becoming his new obsession.

It’s not more than ten minutes from start to finish, but you’re panting and giggly, wrapped around him when he pulls you back into his arms after wrecking both of you with seemingly little effort. “That’s how long it takes to unpack, right?” You snicker, stealing more kisses before you bother to get redressed.

“Didn’t see you complaining.” He huffs, but he’s grinning back at you. “Sometimes quickies are the best kind of fucking.”

“I would not complain.” One more kiss and you have to pull up your pants, otherwise you’ll just drag him into that bed again. “If I ever complain, take me to a doctor because I’ve been body-swapped.”

“That would be a damned shame too.” He reaches out and slaps your ass playfully. “Happen to like this body, and the attitude that’s in it. When she’s not yelling at me.” He teases, winking at you with a smirk.

"I haven't yelled at you once in the last few days." You smirk, returning the ass smack with a sharp crack of your hand and that has both of you raising impressed eyebrows. "Screaming your name is different."

“You can scream my name as loud as you need to, sweetheart.” Javi chuckles and waggles his eyebrows playfully. The past few days have been filled with lighthearted banter and teasing, making him feel younger than he has in years.

“Later.” It’s a promise. Set in stone. And you toss him a wink before getting redressed. “We should go back down, cariño. I think I finally burned off enough of what your dad fed us for breakfast to be hungry for lunch.”

“Then let’s go get something to eat.” He agrees, holding out his hand for you to take. He likes touching you, loves it actually. It’s reassuring and calming for him to touch you. It’s like the part of him that he didn’t know was aching while you were gone is now soothed and repaired when his fingers caress your skin.

“Can I ask you a serious question?” In the doorway of your old room, holding hands with your soulmate, you bite your lip out of nerves.

“You can ask me anything.” The lightheartedness has morphed into something sober, but he doesn’t waver, holding your gaze.

“If you don’t want to have the conversations with my family about marriage or kids or the big future things, it’s totally fine. Everything has happened really fast. So if you only want to tell them about moving to be together, that’s okay with me.” It’s not exactly a question, the way you phrased it, but the thought tumbles out without editing and you hold tight to his hand for certainty. You’re not trying to wiggle out of anything, but rather saying that you’ll take things at his pace.

“Baby,” Javi turns towards you and he caresses your face with his free hand, still holding tight to your other one. “I’ll answer any question that they want to ask.” He promises. “Most of them are yours to answer anyway.” He reminds you. “You decide when you want to get married, or be pregnant.”

"I just don't want you to feel rushed. Or pressured." You clarify, leaning into his chest to hug him tight.

“I’ve had my entire life to wait for this moment.” He assures you. “I’m not feeling rushed, sweetheart. I think we need to be right here.”

"I love you." More than you thought you could. More than you ever expected to. So much that it feels like it's filling up your chest and you hope it never stops.

******

"There you two are." Your mother has the entire table filled with food when you come downstairs, exactly as you predicted, and you give Javi's hand a squeeze as if told say 'I told you so'.

"Sorry, I was showing Javi some old photos after we unpacked," you lie, neatly brushing away the extra time you were upstairs. And making a mental note to show him some high school photos later.

"Hmmmm." The sound that she makes is one of amused disbelief but she doesn't call you out directly. Instead, she motions towards the seats. "Come on, let's eat." She insists.

"So this is what it takes to get you to make lasagna, huh?" Instead of lingering on the question or her obvious disbelief, you trend straight toward teasing — as is your entire family's custom. "One of your kids has to bring home their soulmate to make it happen?"

“Figured it was as good a time as any.” She swats at you playfully and looks towards Javier. “Do you drink wine?”

"Uncle Carmie's homemade basement hooch is an acquired taste, Ma," you laugh, but reach to grab the bottle from the counter anyway before you sit down. "Try some of mine, babe. If you like it, then pour a glass for yourself."

“We made bathtub hooch in high school.” Javi snorts, looking at the bottle and pouring himself some instead of trying yours like you suggested. If he doesn’t like it, he’ll just have the one glass.

"Brave man." Michael snorts, already digging into lunch and bypassing the salad bowl to serve himself a large slice of lasagna. "That shit will put hair on your chest."

"Language, Michael." Your mother warns. "We have a guest.”

Javi chuckles. “I’ve said worse things.” He promises her. “Nothing he says will surprise me.”

"I didn't raise my babies to be crass." She insists, luckily paying more attention to passing the plate of garlic bread than she is to your face and missing the doubtful expression to shoot Javi and your brother. "So, Javier, what an unexpected weekend!"

“It has been surprising,” he admits, looking over at you with a small smile. “But I don’t think that it’s been unwelcome for either one of us.”

"Not at all." You can agree to that wholeheartedly. "It feels very...meant to be."

“I honestly don’t know if I would have had the nerve to call her if she hadn’t shown up at the wedding.” He tells your mother honestly.

"I think it's very sweet that you found each other again by accident." Once everyone is served, only then does your mother tuck in. The four of you have plenty of space at the big, round dinner table but it doesn't feel like you're far apart or that the table is crowded. It just feels comfortable. "The powers that be knew it was time to nudge you back together."

Javi looks down at the meal as been dished up, it looks delicious. “Thank you.” He tells her. “It looks amazing. Your daughter is also one hell of a chef so I know this will be great.”

“She takes after her father.” Your mother beams at that. “I do my best, but she’s got his talent.”

The praise is kind, but you shrug slightly and fork up a perfect bite before throwing Javi a grin. “Chucho promised to teach me Southern cooking, so I’m combining Dad powers.”

“Dad has all of my mom’s recipes.” Javi explains. “Although most of them haven’t been used since she got sick.”

“It can be hard to reopen those old memories. Food carries such nostalgia.” Your mother smiles gently, having known already from your stories about your soulmate that he had lost his mother years ago. “I’m sure she would be proud, just like my husband would be, to see her recipes handed down to the next generation.”

“She would have loved your daughter.” Javi snorts, looking over at you with a fond smile. “And encouraged you to give me hell at every opportunity.”

"That she gets from me," your mother laughs, grinning as you and your brother just shake your heads and continue to eat.

"We figured out early on that Texas stubborn and New England stubborn are pretty similar," you tell her when you finish your bite. "Which is why we butted heads early on. I'm glad we got that phase out of the way early on."

“I’m sure that there will be plenty of head butting left.” Javi has no illusions that life together would be a walk in the park. Neither one of you are built that way.

"Of course." That is the more realistic way of approaching it, you're just feeling really good about the situation right now and it's making you feel rosy. "But at least we'll talk to each other when that happens now. Instead of stonewalling or just getting mad."

“That’s right.” He nods and winks at you before looking back at your mother. “I know you have a lot of questions for me.”

“I might.” She laughs though, appreciating the acknowledgment, and then laughs again when you wave your hand to tell her to go ahead. “Well,” she sips her wine and considers the man at her table. He’s older than you but not by too terribly much. Certainly handsome, but looks as though he has been through a lot. Like the edges of his smile are etched with concern that it might all be too fleeting. Poor dear. He needs a partner. “Have the two of you talked about how you’re going to manage this yet?” She asks, motioning between the two of you.

“To be completely honest….” Javi glances back at you and then looks towards your mother again as he taps the table. “I’m not sure where I stand professionally.” He admits, knowing that it wouldn’t help him get in your mother’s good graces, but it’s the truth. “I am waiting to hear from Washington.”

“Basically, Mom?” You set your fork down for a moment and offer Javi a reassuring smile. “We’re talking about living together being the next step, but we won’t know where until Javi hears from work.”

“I see.” She wonders what he might have done, but she doesn’t ask. “And hopefully there will be a guest bedroom wherever this might be for visitors?”

“Of course.” She isn’t being immediately critical or insistent that you move near her, so you’re ready to agree to just about anything. “No matter where we end up, there will be space for guests.”

“Good.” She will have to be satisfied with that. And hopefully with Javier being in trouble at his job, that will mean that he won’t go back to Colombia. Although, why would he? Escobar is dead.

“There’s no way to do it easily,” you point out to your mother gently. “With both of our families being so far apart.”

“I understand.” She might have broken down crying after the phone call, both in relief that you have been reunited with your soulmate and the fear of losing you again. She won’t tell you that. For too long you had tried to pretend Javier hadn’t existed and that Colombia was a bad dream, now you look happy. She’s not doing to put a damper on that for anything in the world.

“It’s alright, Ma.” Michael jokes, trying to relieve the tension at the table. “Your boys are still homebodies.”

“You never would leave if you wouldn’t get thrown in the brig.” She huffs at her son, but she is happy for how much they love their home.

You glance over at Javi, squeezing his knee under the table in silent question, and smile again when he returns your query with a little nod. Just like upstairs, he reassures you that it's okay to tell. To share the things you've talked about. "If we end up anywhere without four seasons, we're going to have to come home for the holidays at least a few times," you tell your mother, unable to suppress any of the warmth and joy in your expression. "I know you won't let your grandkids go without at least a few white Christmases."

“Babies?” Her eyes widen dramatically and she lights up like a Christmas tree herself. “You’re talking kids?”

There is the excitement you knew was lurking beneath the surface. You know it will be bittersweet for her to have you leave again, but good things are looming in the future. "Not right away," you caution her, but can't help grinning along with your mother. "But yes. We're talking about kids."

“You will make such beautiful babies together.” She sighs happily, emotional and even having to wipe away a stray tear.

"You pressed the grandma button." Michael snorts and helps himself to a second piece of lasagna. "But that means I get to be the favorite uncle, right?" He eyes Javier and raises one eyebrow. "Do you have any brothers, Jav?"

“No.” It’s unusual but he shakes his head. “I’m an only child.” He admits with a sigh. “My parents had a lot of loss early on in pregnancies. So after mama gave birth to me, they decided they were done. Pop didn’t want to risk her health.”

“Which makes perfect sense.” You squeeze his hand gently on top of the table, fingers tucked into fingers, as if that little gesture could possibly tell him that he is enough. That his family is just the right size as it is. “Our kids will already have two ridiculous uncles. That is plenty.”

“I never felt alone.” He tells you quietly. “Too many cousins for that.” He knows you will feel a little sad for him, but you shouldn’t.

“I know, cariño.” His childhood was different from yours, which doesn’t make it better or worse in any way. It just makes it different. “And if you ever catch me implying that it was, just remind me that you have more cousins than I do.”

He smiles at you, understanding completely and reaches for his glass to take a sip of the wine.

“Will there…” Your mother clears her throat in that pointed way only parents can. “Be a wedding, before there are babies? That’s the old fashioned order, I’m told.”

“Unless there’s a change in plan.” He has to admire how blunt your mother is. “My father would beat me black and blue if it was the other way.”

“Glad your father and I are on the same page.” She hums, smirking with something like victory.

He cuts his eyes over at you and gives you an amused look, very aware of the plans your mother is already making. “So we were thinking of eloping.” He announces, just to see what she would say.

The unceremonious squawk that comes out of her mouth is pure shock, you know that, but the way her jaw hits the floor and her eyes widen to the size of dinner plates has you bursting out laughing and all but clinging to Javi’s arm to jerk from falling out of your chair.

“Calm down, Mom,” you wheeze through laughter. “He’s fucking with you.”

Javi chuckles and shrugs. “She bet me twenty dollars I wouldn’t tell you that.” Michael thinks it’s the funniest thing he’s ever heard and slaps Javi on the shoulder.

“I’ll buy you dinner.” You huff, rolling your eyes at him but glad that the boys are entertaining each other.

“You cannot elope.” Your mother gasps and Javi wonders if she actually heard you say it was a joke or if she was too busy having an aneurism. “We aren’t.” He promises. “We will do it right.”

“Javi wants to have a wedding.” Offering up that information seems so important now that you practically hand it to your mother on a platter. “We won’t elope, we promise.”

“I’ve had one failed trip to the altar.” He admits, being honest with your mother seems like a good thing to do. Especially since you and her are close. “My ex-fiancée tricked me into thinking we were soulmates. I found out the night before the wedding.” He sighs. “It put me off of the idea for a long time, but I want to marry your daughter.”

“Is this…” Your mother looks at you curiously.

“The woman telling everyone about us now? Yeah.” You shrug to Javi. “I told her about meeting Lorraine on the phone.”

“She’s been around for a long time.” Javi sighs. “Small town life and all.”

“Oh, I know all about that.” Your mother nods as if she suddenly understands the situation perfectly. “My sister-in-law is the queen of small town gossip. Up here at least. They would probably be dangerous together.”

“I don’t mind people knowing.” Javi shrugs again. “So I didn’t try to keep her from running her mouth.”

"No, it's definintely not a secret." Not anymore. Not this time around. Not when you've well and truly learned your lesson about keeping your mouth shut when you care about someone. You will never abstain from telling Javi you love him again. "I'd shout it from the rooftops here and in Texas."

Javi chuckles and smirks at you. “Really? From the rooftops?”

His challenge only makes you grin and you nod emphatically. “Pick some rooftops if you don’t believe me.”

“I believe you.” He promises. “But I don’t think it’s necessary. I know you love me. And I’d do anything for you.”

“I’m glad we agree.” You murmur, leaning over at the table to kiss him softly. The smallest, gentlest show of affection that actually means so much. The fact that you’ve learned to be gentle with each other is huge. It shows how far you’ve come, and so quickly too.

******

“Javier, uh, there’s a call for you.” The statement comes with a little bit of bewilderment, and Javi looks at you as he leans forward, unfolding his arm from where it was lying behind you on the couch. “Okay.” He stands up quickly, aware that two people have this number, his father and the secretary for the director of the DEA. Either way, a call for him has to be important.

Your mother has set down the telephone on the nearby kitchen counter in order to come into the living room where the television is on, and she sits down in her armchair on your other side when you don't get up to follow Javier into the kitchen immediately.

"Did it sound official?" You ask, wondering if Chucho is alright or if the calls he's been waiting for from Washington has finally come through.

“It was a woman.” She frowns slightly and glances back towards the kitchen. “Like a secretary or something.”

"His hearing." Sinking slightly in your seat seems like a reasonable reaction, but a moment later you're pushing off the couch to stand. "If it were his dad, you would still be in there chatting long distance. A secretary means the call is from Washington."

Javi turns as you walk into the kitchen, still listening as he motions you forward. “Wednesday at thirteen hundred.” He confirms, frowning slightly when he realizes that it will eat into his visit with your family. He will have to get the train to D.C. tomorrow to make sure he’s there on time. “Yes. Thank you.”

He opens one arm to let you close when he hangs up the phone, and you immediately slip to his side. "Wednesday." You repeat the day and tuck yourself in tight beside him. "I'll call and get out train tickets if you want to go pack."

He sighs softly, resting his cheek against yours and feeling a little nervous. He knows that they should fire him, but he doesn’t want to end his career with the DEA like this. “Do you want to come with me?”

"Of course I'm coming." There was never a doubt or question in your mind. "I'm not going to make you face this alone, baby. Especially not when you did it for me."

“Even if I am fired, I still have no regrets.” Javi promises, dropping a kiss on your lips gently.

"If you're fired then we'll go back to Texas with our heads held high, and you'll take that deputy job." You promise him, savoring that kiss and that promise like a lifeline. "I'm with you no matter what."

“No matter what.” It might be surprising to him, something he’s still accepting and getting used to, but he takes comfort in it. No matter what, he will have you.

******

"How long do you think we'll have to wait for them to deliberate?" Waiting outside the hearing room to be called back in feels like waiting for a death sentence, but you sit with your hands under your thighs and try not to fidget in your most-presentable office dress while Javi paces up and down the hallway.

Sighing, he resists the urge to rub his hand through his hair and ruin it. It’s already been hard enough to resist having a cigarette. Fuck, he needs one. “The rest of my life.” He growls, glancing back at the door impatiently.

"At least we're on the same page." You agree, sighing outwardly and silently wishing for the same two things as him — an answer and a cigarette.

He glances back at you on his next pass down the hallway and sees you playing with your skirt. Walking over to the chair beside you and dropping down into it with a heavy huff. “Whatever happens, I’m not going to apologize for what I did.” He reminds you. “Kissing ass isn’t my style.”

"I don't expect you to apologize." No, you know him better than that. And you know the bastards in the government better than that, too. "I just wish I could go in there and start throwing punches at the assholes who preside over all the bullshit bureaucracy while they make everybody else do the dirty work."

“Fucking bastards.” He grunts, glancing back at the door again. “I should tell them to kiss my ass.”

"Aw, c'mon." You squeeze his hand, aiming a lurid grin at him to try to distract him for even a second. "That's my job."

He snorts and shakes his head. “You haven’t done it yet.” He points out, smirking slightly.

Glad that your strategy worked even for a second, you wink and blow him a kiss. "Tonight," you promise, glossing it in a sultry tone that makes both of you laugh.

The door to the room opens and Javi’s face immediately shifts into something serious. Whipping his head around to watch as a bureaucrat in a well-cut suit and a fresh haircut sticks his head out. “Peña,” he calls. “We’re ready for you.”

You squeeze his hand tightly before letting go so he can straighten, and silently curse the whole bullshit process one more time as he disappears behind the hearing room door. You aren't allowed in there despite having played a role in the whole thing, and so you're stuck outside listening at the door for at least a little bit longer.

Javi sees a panel of five in front of him and he knows that it’s not good. He’s rubbed some the wrong way, especially since Messina is one of the five. He had ignored her orders more than once in the pursuit of Escobar.

It's a bureaucratic lecture as much as a hearing. A spanking laced with backhanded compliments. It's a clusterfuck of blame gaming and backpedaling. It's the kind of bullshit that would have had you snapping at someone if you were in here with him so he is belatedly glad that you have to wait outside.

Right up until those few magic words: "Agent Peña, how much do you know about the Cali Cartel?"

******

An hour later, Javier opens the door, stepping back out onto the hall with a slightly stunned expression on his face.

"What happened?" He doesn't look upset, but you still shoot up out of your seat instantly.

He had been looking down at the file in his hand and when you say something, he looks up at you. Suddenly wondering if this might be too much for you. “I— got a promotion.” He manages.

"What?" Your jaw drops and eyebrows shoot up to your hairline.

He rocks his jaw for a moment and steps over to you. Frowning slightly. “I shouldn’t take it.” He murmurs quietly, hearing the door open behind him and the panel file out of the room, chattering to themselves.

"Do you want to take it?" It seems ludicrously obvious to you that he should take it, in fact, but Javi is not always a straightforward man.

“More than anything, but….” He sighs softly and reaches up to cup your cheeks. “I’ll walk away if you want me to.”

"Why the hell would I want you to do that?"

“I have been made station chief of Bogotá, Colombia.” He reveals softly. “Tasked with taking down the Gentlemen of Cali.”

"Shit." It feels for a second like you've been kicked in the chest by Chucho's work horse, but the swirling confusion around you settles to a sting in mere moments. "So...we're going back?"

He sees the panic that races across your face, the fear flashing in your eyes. He wants this. He wants to prove that he can do it, that he can complete his mission and take them down, but he won’t do it at your expense. “Not if you don’t want to.” It’s on the tip of his tongue to tell you to stay behind, but he knows you will reject that idea completely.

It takes a long second, but when you rest your hand on his wrist and feel the warmth of him flood you — the safety of him — you remember how to breathe. "I won't do anything stupid this time," you promise him without a hint of sarcasm or teasing. "If you say I need security, I need security. And I'm not taking any shitty jobs in dodgy parts of town."

“Are you sure?” He worries and it shows in his eyes, not caring that his superiors see him with you like this. They know the connection – now – and it’s already been determine that he would have secure housing for you and him. “Sweetheart, I don’t want you to make yourself go if you can’t.” As badly as he wants this, he would never make you relive that time.

“I love you, too.” That is what he’s saying. Through the worry and the negotiation, he’s saying how much he cares, and that means the world to you. So you take a deep breath. “Escobar is dead. Whatever the new threat is…I know you can deal with it. And I’d rather try and go with you than just hide in my fear forever. If it’s too much, I’ll come back to the States and we’ll rack up a hell of a long distance bill.”

“Okay.” He watches you closely, looking for any hesitation. “We’ll be staying in a high security building.”

“I’m proud of you.” It’s so important that he know that. That he understands this is a huge victory and that you don’t let it be overshadowed by what happened years ago. “You’ve worked your ass off and you deserve the recognition.”

“We’ll see.” He snorts. “It’s more responsibility, and I’ll be more hands off.” That part will drive him crazy, not leading the investigation himself.

"You'll have office hours?" It sounds almost entirely foreign coming from a man you know used to burn the candle at every available end. "And I would be waiting for you at home...how very Donna Reed of us."

He chuckles. “Well you can always work on those family recipes and go get your hair done and have lunch.” He shrugs. “Whatever the wives do.”

"Maybe that's the first book. A family cookbook." You laugh slightly, in disbelief at how ordinary it sounds. "So when do we leave?"

Javi grimaces slight and bites his lip. “A week?” He asks. “They wanted me to leave in two days but I told them I needed a week.”

"Okay." That gets a nod from you, and you grasp his hands tightly. "We'll get train tickets to go back to Rhode Island tonight and I'll pack up, then we'll fly back to Laredo so you can pack, too? See Chucho again for a few days and then we'll fly back to Colombia from Texas?"

“That works for me if it works for you.” He hums, wondering if you are putting on a brave face or if you are just this strong.

"I'll look up Inez after we get settled." You decide, grateful for a moment to lean against him when he opens up one arm to let you into his orbit. He's worried. You know that. And you're worried too. But it took until the prospect of being apart from him again to realize that the bond between you is a hell of a lot stronger than your fear. "We'll make it work."

He almost asks if you will see about finding Vanessa and Freckles, but he doesn’t. He can’t ask that question, not right now. He nods. “It would be good for you to have someone.” He murmurs.

“I’ll do my best to make friends with the other wives,” you promise, but you know it might be futile. You’re probably going to struggle with the traditional role expected of you, but you’ll get the important things right. Being there to support him is the most important part. “There’s…no chance Steve and Connie will be there with us, I guess?”

“They are in Miami.” He tells you, shaking his head. “Family is there and they have Olivia.”

“Yeah.” It was a long shot and you knew that, so you just nod. “I didn’t think so. That’s okay. They earned their rest. You still have some serious ass to kick.” A warm, soft, fierce smile curves up the corners of your mouth, etched with pride and determination. This may not be your fight from the outside, but you have some personal demons who need to get squashed in the process.

******

“Sweetheart?” The man who would never pass up a chance to eye a beautiful woman barely looks at the young stewardess as she asks if there’s anything else he needs after delivering his drink. Glancing over at you to make sure you haven’t changed your mind about just wanting water. “Anything else?”

“No, I’m okay. Thank you.” At some point later you might ask for a snack but right now your water and the window seat are plenty enough.

“We’re good.” He turns back towards the slightly miffed looking woman with a nod, but doesn’t smile at her as he dismisses her.

You huff a laugh under your breath as she walks away and settle your hand over his knee in the tiny airplane seats. “You bruised her ego. Poor thing wanted to flirt.”

“Huh?” His brow furrows in confusion and he frowns as he tries to understand what you are talking about. Until he catches the woman moving out of the corner of his eye and glances over. “Oh. No.” He shakes his head. “That’s not going to happen.”

“How was she supposed to know that?” You ask with a small grin. Commitment is a very sexy look on him.

He glances back at you, aware that you are teasing him and he shifts in his seat. He’s had time to think about a lot of things. Going back to Colombia is chance for him to prove himself, in more ways than one. “I – uh, I know that I’ve been— uh, a slut.” He grimaces slightly at the term, but it’s the truth. “But even Lorraine would tell you that I never— when we were together – I didn’t cheat.”

“Javi…” His choice of term does makes you crack a grin, but you still face him in your seat and take this moment as seriously as he is in giving it to you. “To be honest? It never even crossed my mind that you might. You were both a bit slutty before.” In Colombia, at least. You haven’t been since meeting him. “And now we’re committed. It’s a brave new world of monogamy for both of us.”

It’s like he releases a breath he didn’t know he was holding, the relief is nearly physical. He wouldn’t blame you if he couldn’t satisfy your needs, it would honestly be kind of a fitting punishment for everything he’s done, but when you say monogamy he knows you mean it. “Yeah it is.” He nods.

“We can do it.” Seeing the relief on his face is almost like seeing it on your own, and you laugh a little and lower your voice. “We both have high sex drives. I’ll just come into the office so we can fuck on your lunch break.”

“Too bad you don’t still have that skirt you wore the first day I met you.” Now that that larger than imagined weight is off his chest, he smirks at you. Still imagining how you would have looked back then bent over his desk.

"I can easily get a new pencil skirt." In fact, now that you've lost a bit of weight, it will be that much easier to find nice things. "Should be a piece of cake now."

He frowns again and reaches for your hand. “The original was fucking sexy.” He promises. “I thought about bending you over my desk and didn’t know your name.”

The reassurance is sweet, and welcome, but you lean over to press a chaste kiss to his lips and grin. "And now you actually get to do it."

“Too bad it’s a full flight.” He chuckles. “Otherwise I might haul you into the bathroom on this tin can.”

"Save it." You nudge your nose against his. "We have a new apartment to christen."

“About that.” Javi shrugs slightly. “Station chief has its perks.” He tells you. “We are in penthouse accommodations. Views of the entire city.”

“Very fancy.” He’s told you about a few perks so far, including the fact that they’ve apparently assigned him a driver that you know he won’t use. Javi’s preference is always to drive himself — even visiting your family you gave directions from the passenger seat. “No jogging up three flights of stairs this time.”

“Thank fucking god.” Javi groans, leaning back in his seat. “I’m getting too old for that shit.”

"Just wait until it's kids we're running after." You sit back with him, grin still spread across your face. "That's a hell of a lot more running, cariño."

“Fuck.” He hisses. “Do you think those little assholes will run across rooftops too?”

"Not until they're older." Your laugh turns full and amused, but you link your fingers through his and smile. "I have a feeling at least one of them will grow up to be a stubborn badass like their dad."

“Fuck.” He closes his eyes and sighs. “I’ve never told anyone this….and I’ll deny I said shit— but I don’t like heights.”

"Well." Fingers squeezing his, you nudge his shoulder and grin. "Then I won't ask you to fuck me against the penthouse windows. Don't need you looking down and getting scared."

“Oh no, fuck that.” His eyes shoot open and he glares at you. “That’s happening.” He huffs. “I mean I don’t like running across a roof when I have don’t know if I’m going to fall through the mother fucker and kill myself. I’ll definitely fuck you against the window.”

You smother a snort, knowing that that comment would get to him but glad to see the fire in his eyes regardless. "I'm looking forward to it."

He huffs at you, fully aware that you had baited him and he had fallen for it. Cutting his eyes as he takes a sip of his drink, he passes it to you automatically after he swallows.

"Don't be sour." He's ordered a whiskey from the stewardess and the sip you take burns pleasantly on its way down before you hand it back. "It's my only penthouse-related fantasy. I just wanted to make sure it sounded good to you, too."

“I’m not sour.” He promises after a moment. “Do you want to read the file too?” He has no intention of leaving you out of anything.

"Am I allowed to?" It hadn't occurred to you that it would be permitted, what with government red tape and all.

“Yeah.” He nods as he reaches down and pulls the file out of his briefcase. “I’ve already told them you will be read in.” He shrugs. “They don’t care since you are my soulmate.”

"I guess that saves us from having to worry about talking shop at home." Although you have to wonder if they would still be so blase if you were still employed as a journalist. Probably not. Which is fair.

“They knew I was going to do it anyway.” He admits shamelessly. “Nothing that could possibly put you in danger will be kept from you.”

"Who knows." You shrug. The flight is just beginning and you settle in for the few hours it will take to get to your layover in Mexico City. "Maybe I'll be able to help? I guess we'll find out."

******

The keys rattle in the door before it swings open, revealing Javi. Carrying his suit jacket and another box of files, he shuffles into the house and closes the door behind him. He’s later than he said he would be, and he feels guilty when he smells dinner, obviously waiting on him. Hopefully you got sick of waiting for him and went ahead and ate. “I’m home.” He calls out.

"I'm in the kitchen!" When you heard the door you had hopped up from the dinner table to throw dinner back into the oven and you stretch your aching muscles by reaching for two glasses and the whiskey bottle as he drags himself in looking haggard. "Hey baby."

“Hey.” He’s frustrated and tired, but he shoots you a half smile, aware that you will understand that. “Sorry. I got caught up.” It’s not an excuse, but at least you didn’t have to call him to find out where he was – this time.

"I figured, so I put your portion of baked pasta in a separate baker. I just put it in the oven. C'mere and let me hug you." Your arms come around him once he puts the files down on the counter, holding him against you and letting the relatively simple act of holding him evolve naturally as it always does — into a deep kiss.

Javi leans into you, unable to articulate how much he has needed you and appreciated you being here this time. He has the physical connection he needs, the emotional one just as important and he can confide in you. Pour his worries out and he knows that you would never betray him. Being the station chief in charge of this ordeal has been far more difficult than he had even imagined and it seems like no one but him and his agents want the gentlemen of Cali behind bars.

"So you brought home some weekend reading?" You prompt, after he's melted into your arms and is limply hugging you back like he does on his hardest days.

“I honestly don’t know if I can fucking do this.” He sighs, pulling back and looking at you with a weary expression. “We are being stonewalled.”

"Of course you can do this." A little self-doubt is understandable, though, and you lead him over to the table to let him flop into a chair while you go back for the glasses and whiskey. "If this was going to be easy they could have had anyone sitting in your office just napping the day away. But they asked you. They asked the man that they knew could push through the hardest days and the pull the hardest punches." You set the glasses down beside him and pour both to join him. "We've been here almost a year, Jav. We're just barely cracking the surface. The whole thing getting hard as hell right before you find a crack in the case...it's annoying as fuck but it makes sense."

He snorts, even though you are right. “It’s almost annoying how good you are at this.” He grumbles, nodding his thanks for the drink and pulling you down into his lap.

"I'd like to think I've had a little practice by now," you admit, placing a soft kiss on his lips. "Just like you've learned how to talk me down from my word count panics when I don't think I'm getting enough written to really count as a writer."

“Your book is going to be amazing.” When he needs a break from reports or the bullshit that comes with this case, he’s been reading your progressing first draft of your novel. Giving you his honest feedback and never complaining when you make him re-read a slightly changed chapter over and over again.

"I'm going to claw my way into the mystery genre with my bare hands." The two of you share a small laugh, another kiss, and a sip from the same glass before you lean your forehead against his gently. "Happy anniversary, by the way."

“Anniversary?” His brows furrow in confusion and his heart skips a beat with worry that he’s fucked up something bad.

"It's been four years since we met the first time." It isn't the anniversary of when you got together, or of when you first started living together, or any of the other things. But something small, and silly, and just for you. "It's not big, but it's worth marking."

“Oh shit.” He relaxes slightly and his fingers caress your side gently. “Yeah, it’s been four years.” In some ways, it seems like a lifetime ago, so much has changed.” That makes him think of something. “Did you ever send that letter to Helena?”

"I got back a postcard today." There is no need to hop up from his lap, thankfully, and instead you reach across the table to slide the glossy card out from under your notebook and hand it to him. "She's getting married. Apparently her soulmate was in the States the whole time. But she promises to write us a longer letter when they're back from their honeymoon in a few weeks."

“That’s good.” Probably the best news he’s heard in a long time and he picks up the card to look at the neat handwriting. “She deserves happiness.”

"She does." You can agree to that wholeheartedly. "I'm glad she found it."

He hums and leans in, pressing his face into your neck and breathing you in. “Just like we’ve found it.” He murmurs softly. “We should get married.”

"You gotta propose first, hermoso." It might only be a gentle tease, but you grin as you wrap your arms around his shoulders to hold him close. "Then I can say yes and we can get to planning."

Sitting in his button up shirt, his tie askew, Javier reaches into his pocket and pulls out the ring that he had taken out of the box earlier to inspect and shoved in his pants when Stetchner had come into his office uninvited. “You want me to get down on one knee?” He asks, holding it up for you to see. “Figured we could elope and not tell your mom. Let her plan the wedding and we just show up.”

"Javi!" The surprise of seeing an actual ring in his hand has you nearly falling off his lap but you hold on even tighter out of shock, just like thoughts start tumbling out of your mouth like they do when you get surprised. "No you don't need to get—did you really—how long have you been carrying that around for?"

“Picked it up two weeks ago?” He had been trying to think of something romantic, something fitting for your proposal, but everything seemed overkill. He showed you he loved you everyday, with the little things, not with overly elaborate proposals that could mean shit if he didn’t really want to commit. But right now seems like the right time. A very honest moment between the two of you.

"It's perfect." The ring, the moment — him — all of it. It's a standstill moment in time that could never have been manufactured and never could be duplicated. It's just for the two of you and it's perfect. You swoop in, needing to kiss him right now more than you need air.

He takes the kiss, easily, happily. Wrapping his arm around you and still holding up the ring, he lets the kiss drag on for a long minute before he pulls back with a smirk. “Is that a yes then?”

"Hell yes that's a yes." A giddy laugh bubbles out of you, and you can't help but steal one more, infinitely more chaste, kiss. "As soon as you want. We'll have to run back to the States for a weekend to actually have the wedding, but I'll let Mom plan whatever she wants and she'll be ecstatic."

“I thought you would like that.” The party is more of what Javier wants. The celebration. He doesn’t care if it’s in a church, although he’s sure that’s where it will be. And you will have already been married for however long planning the wedding takes, so you will get your way with wanting a marriage. “I love you, sweetheart.” He promises softly. “It’s fitting that our story started here and this is where we will make it forever.”

"I love you, too." He slides the ring onto your finger with satisfied pride and you don't bother blinking away the press of happy tears behind your eyes. They don't fall, you don't blubber, they're just there. Reminding you that the pounding of your heart is just as real as this moment. "I can't wait for whatever comes next."

------

Master Tags: @pixiedurango @chattychell @winter-fox-queen @lady-himbo @artsymaddie @princess76179 @paintballkid711 @missminkylove @pedrosbrat @ew-erin @sarahjkl82-blog @sharkbait77 @justanotherblonde23 @lv7867 @recklesswit @mylittlesenaar @f0rever15elf @gallowsjoker @steeevienicks @athalien @sherala007 @skvatnavle @thatpinkshirt @jaime1110 @girlimjusttryingtoreadfanfics @goodgriefitsawildworld @greeneyedblondie44 @littlemousedroid @harriedandharassed @churchill356 @ajathegreats-blog @haylzcyon   @beardsanddetectives @kirsteng42 @ladykatakuri @adancedivasmom @madiebear @tanzthompson @emilianamason @bigsdinger @xocalliexo @pedr0swh0r3 @avaleineandafryingpan @charlyrmv @avidreader73 @iceclaw101 @loveslide @elegantduckturtle @becsworld @julesonrecord @its-nebuleuse @itsrubberbisquit @mikeyswifie @guelyury @lizzie-cakes @for-a-longlongtime @vabeachazn @purplerain04 @weho2kcmo @madnessofadaydreamer

BFoW: @haileymorelikestupid @theorganasolo @missladym1981 @alexiamargot06 @southernbe @cloudroomblog @the-queen-of-sorrows

[guilty-pleasures21]

Neighbour's son Miguel

I'm just stretching this out to keep you guys on your toes 😈, but I already have it all planned out and it's so cute!!!

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Warnings: None.

----------------------------------------------------------

Neighbour's son!Miguel who started uni two years ago - just like you. You bounce on the balls of your feet as you search the airport for wavy brown hair and that signature O'Hara smile, and your heart thuds in your chest when you find who you're looking for. “Gabe! Auntie!” You rush over and give each of them a big hug. “My car’s just outside. How was your flight?” Conchata sighs as you take her arm and start guiding them towards the carpark. “It was horrible, mija. So cramped and so noisy! Juro po Dios, I am never getting on another flight again!” Although she’d left their father years ago, no longer able to stand the constant abuse and affairs he’d carried on shamelessly, she’d wanted to wait until her sons had finished school to move back to the house her ex-husband had left her in the divorce. Gabe grins at his mother’s dramatics as he pushes the trolley behind you. “Be careful what you wish for, mamà,” he jokes. Conchata shakes her head firmly, standing her ground. “No. If you or Miguel ever want to see me again, either you get on a flight or you stay with me forever.” You laugh as you get into the lift to go down to the carpark. “That doesn’t sound too bad,” you mumble softly, your heart fluttering at the mention of your old friend. “How is … How is Miguel?” 

Neighbour's son!Miguel whose mother exchanges a knowing look with her younger son at how shy you’ve suddenly become. The two of you had fallen out of touch over the last few years, the miles of ocean between you too great an obstacle to overcome at your young age. But your mothers had stayed in contact, gossiping over how neither of you had truly been able to let go of the other, even after all these years. They’d planned Conchata’s ‘welcome back’ barbeque for the first day of Miguel’s summer break, not-so-secretly hoping that the two of you would take a liking to one another and eventually end up together. “He’s fine,” Conchata assures you, patting your arm as the lift doors open. “He'll be here next week in time for the barbeque.” Gabe leans over as he pushes the trolley out of the lift and towards your car. “He said he's heading to the airport straight after his last exam!” he reveals excitedly. “He was all like ‘¡Ay, Dios! I can't wait to see Y/N again! She looks so pretty in her pictures on Instagram. I hope she doesn't have a boyfriend or anything.’” You cover your face with your hair as you help Conchata into the passenger seat. Had Miguel really said that about you? You’d definitely never thought the exact same things about him: how handsome he’d grown to become, how none of his pictures had ever included a pretty girl by his side, how he’d apparently spent his prom night with his friends instead of any date. Definitely nothing like that. “Right. Sure.” 

Neighbour's son!Miguel whose brother chuckles as he loads their bags into the back of your car. “Well, just so you know, he's never had a girlfriend. And he hasn't met anyone in uni either,” Gabe reveals to you, his tone teasing. He shuts the boot, then starts climbing into the backseat. “And even if he did and has secretly been lying about it to us, I can one hundred percent assure you that she won't be there when he goes back next year. That's the Gabriel O'Hara guarantee.” He couldn’t imagine his brother being with anyone but his childhood sweetheart - the girl whose life his own had been so intricately intertwined with from the start. And if he were being honest, he’d always suspected that his brother had secretly felt the same, forever subconsciously comparing every girl who crossed his path with the one who’d held his heart from the beginning. You laugh at his words as you pull out of the parking lot, trying to not get your hopes up. “Sure. I’m gonna hold you to that, Gabriel O'Hara.” Gabe leans over the back of your seat, a mischievous grin on his sharp features. “Of course!” he agrees easily. “Anything for my brother’s little bombón.” You bite down on your lip to stop a giggle from falling out as your heart flutters at the familiar term of affection.

Neighbour's son!Miguel whose flight landed an hour ago. You rush around your backyard, helping your mum get the food set up for the barbeque. “Y/N!” your mum calls. “Can you call Roshan? I need him and Gabe to help your father put up the fairy lights. That man is so stubborn!” You smile as she continues muttering about your dad, her voice fading away as she goes to help your sister with the ice box. You wander back into your house and find your brother standing in the kitchen, his head in the fridge as he searches for something to munch on. You nudge the fridge door and fix your brother with an exasperated look when he straightens. “Seriously?” you ask. “Can't you just wait half an hour for dinner?” He shrugs and pops another ball of chocolate-coated wafer in his mouth. You sigh and roll your eyes as you close the fridge door. “Mummy wants you and Gabe to help Papa put up the fairy lights. They're in the backyard.” Your brother leaves to find your parents, but you hear his voice filter in from the entrance. “Miguel?! Hey! How's it going! How'd you get so huge?!” Your heart stops when you realise that he’s finally here: your best friend in the whole world who you’d thought about at least once everyday since he’d left all those years ago. Wait. Did that make him your Roman empire? Wait. What did that even matter right now?! The only thing that mattered was making sure you looked your absolute best when you finally met him again! You spin around, meaning to rush over to the bathroom to check that your makeup was all right, but you stop in your tracks immediately. “Hi.”

Continue

[thisbuildinghasfeelings]

TK Babe/Baby ❤️🌈

A quote from every single time TK has called Carlos "babe" or "baby" SO FAR.

Babe/Baby Key under the cut!

Color-coded Key (I can't make text yellow, so pretend the pink is yellow!)

Thanks for being here babe. 2x02: TK thanking Carlos for being there for the tumor cake party.

Hi, baby. 2x08: A concussed TK greeting Carlos as he rushes in to save him from the murderous kidnapping bank robbers.

Two wheats, babe. 2x11: During a game of Catan.

Babe, thank god you're here. 2x12: When Carlos arrives at the firehouse as TK is fretting over why Owen got arrested for arson.

Baby, do you smell that? 2x12: When sex was interrupted by a fire.

Yeah, babe. 2x14: TK telling Carlos about Mateo's mic-drop moment during the dust storm.

Hey, baby, breathe. 3x04: TK waking up from a coma to tell Carlos to breathe.

Baby, it's 3 in the morning. 3x05: TK coming to look for Carlos when he's working on the missing child case at 3 in the morning.

Hi, babe, perfect timing. 3x07: TK greeting Carlos with an offer to play next when Carlos arrives at the firehouse to tell them about the Red vs Blue controversy.

Babe, I know you're going through it. 3x11: TK trying to get Carlos to cool it with the rage punching.

Our meeting's at 5 babe. 3x13: TK declining Carlos' offer for coffee or tea because he and Cooper have to get to their meeting.

I don't even know what that means, babe. 3x13: TK's response to Carlos telling him that he's just "trying to figure out what my place is."

Hi, baby. 3x13: TK greeting Carlos when coming home from a meeting.

Hey, babe. 3x15: TK greeting Carlos when coming home with a lizard.

Hey, baby. 3x15: TK greeting Carlos when coming home with mealworms.

Hey...babe. 3x15: TK trying his best to distract Carlos from the fact that Lou has escaped.

Oh my god, babe. 3x15: TK's reaction to finding out that Carlos found Lou and put him safely back in his tank.

Baby. 3x18: TK waking Carlos up to propose to him.

Baby, I'm serious. 3x18: TK reassuring Carlos that he's serious about this proposal.

Baby, this isn't drama. 3x18: TK telling Carlos that it isn't drama inspiring the proposal, it's love.

And baby, my life has been scarred with loss. 3x18: TK continuing to explain to Carlos the reasoning behind his proposal.

And baby, we only get so many. 3x18: TK emphasizing that every moment they're not married is a wasted moment and they only get so many moments.

Hi, baby. 4x01: TK greeting Carlos when he arrives at the firehouse.

Baby, that's fantastic! 4x01: TK's reaction to Carlos telling him that the dream wedding venue is available in 8 weeks.

Hey, babe, I was getting worried. 4x03: TK answering Carlos' call right before Carlos goes into the tunnel to get shoveled.

Stay with me, baby. 4x04: TK resuscitating Carlos.

Come on, baby. 4x04: More resuscitation.

Oh, baby, you saved your own life. 4x04: TK's response to Carlos' thanking him for saving his life.

Ok, babe. 4x12: TK nervously getting ready to interview officiants.

Babe, you don't even hike here. 4x12: TK trying to bring Carlos back to reality a bit after he says he wants to hike the Great Wall.

Babe, it's beautiful. 4x12: TK's response to being presented with a bearded dragon.

*gasp* Babe! 4x14: TK's reaction to Carlos' reveal as the pudding thief.

Yeah, babe. 4x15: TK confirming that he can see photos of the possible suspects for the kidney patient who gave him a black eye.

Babe, my dad's calling. 4x16: TK calling Carlos over to the call with Owen to find out the results of his Huntington's test.

Oh my god, baby, I'm freaking out. 4x16: TK freaking out before picking up the phone.

Babe. 4x17: TK's response to Gabriel making the offer for Carlos to join the Texas Rangers.

You should really try to, babe. 4x18: TK's response to Carlos telling him he doesn't feel much like sleeping the night after his father's funeral.

You've got nothing to be sorry about, baby. 4x18: TK reassuring a grief-stricken Carlos as they're about to postpone the wedding.

Hey, babe. 4x18: TK coming home to Carlos trying to set up a VCR.

Baby, have you been up all night? 4x18: TK waking up to a spiraling Carlos who has indeed been up all night.

Baby, when's the last time you slept for more than a couple hours? 4x18: TK trying to encourage a spiraling Carlos to get some sleep.

[liliacamethyst]

Are you releasing part 3 this week still? No rush and don’t feel pressured to put it out sooner, i love your work! ❤️

Hey, I’m so sorry but Part 3 won't be coming out this week. I apologize - I'm just drowning in uni work and dealing with some personal stuff. I'm going through a bit of a creativity slump and I’m kinda stuck atm. I don't want to let you down by rushing it. But here's a snippet of what I got so far. Found this gem on TikTok that made me laugh so I decided to incorporate it into the story. Hope you enjoy this lil sneak peak:

Hobie scoops up the little boy, cradling him close in an attempt to soothe his relentless tears. "See, the cow says muhhhhh," he coos. His tiny cries falter, curiosity momentarily replacing distress. He gazes at Hobie with wide eyes, intrigued by the cool looking man. "And the butterfly," Hobie pauses dramatically, "well, the butterfly don’t say nothin’." He continues his little game, while rocking the baby gently in his arms. "And the pig says-"

 Miles chimes in with an eager grin, "Oink, Oink."

"Nah, bruv," Hobie laughs. “The pig says, ‘You have the right to remain silent!’”

Gabriel’s face scrunches up, and the waterworks start again. Hobie chuckles, "Fair enough, little fella. Cops make me wanna cry too."

[somehow-a-human]

The angels don't have to ask to enter the bookshop.

DO NOT ASK NEIL ABOUT FAN THEORY.

We've been operating under the assumption that BOTH the angels and demons have to ask to enter the bookshop, but I don't think that's true. I'm pretty sure it's one of our red herrings for season 2.

Continued under the cut.

When Gabriel shows up to the bookshop nude and oblivious, the doors are closed and (I believe) locked. Gabriel doesn't even know who or where he is, so he does what the default is... he knocks, and asks "Can I come in?" Aziraphale is frightened at first and tells him he can't come in but eventually our angels empathy wins and he says "Alright! Just... just get in!"

>> It's never clear that Gabriel would have physically been unable to come in otherwise.

When the Archangels show up Aziraphale literally cuts them off before they reach the door of the bookshop. Saraqael suggests, "Shall we discuss this inside?", and Aziraphale continues, "By all means. Would you like to come in?"

>> If Aziraphale hadn't rushed out to meet the angels, why wouldn't they have just walked into the bookshop like they did numerous times in season 1? Additionally I am fairly certain Aziraphale's "By all means. Would you like to come in?" was added in post via ADR. That doesn't necessarily add credence to anything, just an observation.

When Muriel arrives to surveil Aziraphale they ask, "Great! Well, could I come in and do it inside please? Only cause it's really noisy out here and I can't hear anything." Aziraphale replies, "By all means."

>> Muriel is an endearing angel who doesn't know much about life on earth, but had the shop been open and unlocked at the time of their arrival, they might've just wandered in as well.

We're never told the angels *can't* enter the bookshop explicitly like we are for the demons. We've always just assumed the same rules apply to all of the ethereal and occult beings.

But then, might I ask, why does Aziraphale tell us "Technically, this bookshop still counts as an Embassy"?

If the bookshop is still an embassy, the angels wouldn't need permission to enter, they would still have jurisdiction, and would still be able to monitor what's going on there... yes?

Let's compare this to the demons attempts to enter the bookshop, because Shax states clearly that she can't enter without permission. We see this again when she tries to get into the Bentley after it's canonically 'our car', and therefore at least partially owned by an angel.

I'm pretty sure John and Neil make a point of having the angels all ask in some way to enter, and Aziraphale seem to grant them permission as a red herring. They don't need to, but they want us to assume a false sense of security, to think that the bookshop is a safe space for our duo, outside of the reaches of both Heaven and Hell.

Technicalities are big in season 2 and I definitely think they're a huge underlying string running through all of Good Omens. In season 1, Crowley and Aziraphale stop Heaven and Hell from trying to restart Armageddon on a technicality. Gabriel and Beelzebub don't technically know if the great plan *is* the ineffable plan! It's definitely a favorite trope of Terry and Neil's to mock unfair, broken, bureaucratic systems, and Heaven and Hell are a PERFECT example of this.

**Somebody has written a meta on technicalities, I know I've seen it but I cannot for the life of me find it so if anyone could tag me so I could link it that would be brills! (Yeah that's right I'm adopting that from Charles from Dead Boy Detectives, 80's british slang ftw, I'm obsessed; please watch it, please, I need a second season.)

Neil has mentioned that the plot for season 3 might've had to be changed from he and Terry's original vision a bit, based on the political climate of the current day, and I'm sure that means we'll see some technicalities being the downfall of Heaven and Hells systems in Season 3 as well. I don't think the metatron is a villain, nor any of the other angels or demons. They're just fulfilling their function, following a set of rules, very much to a fault. This is all just God's big experiment after all, freewill, choice, eating the apple, and the angels and demons aren't exempt.

I wouldn't be surprised if there's some sort of technicality about the angels and demons themselves in season 3. We've seen that they're of the same stock, and we know Crowley at least is technically still the same person he was when he was an angel... more or less. Could the book of life end up revealing something like that the demons still exist perpetually as their angelsonas? A technicality, if you will?

Given the bookshop is still technically an embassy, is everything that happens inside observable by Heaven? Can they access the bookshop in their Earth Observation Files? There is some questionable blocking surrounding the bust in Aziraphale's bookshop, coupled with a curious record cover from Maggie's bookshop pointed out by @noneorother

Anyway... Let me know your thoughts. I haven't been posting as much, I have been mega busy and I'm trying to be thankful for it. Love you all, hope you have something nice happen for you today! <3

[crowleysgirl56]

Ok, so here are some of my rather long rambling thoughts. I’ll start off with some pros and cons and then provide some speculation:

My initial negative reaction:

- Compressing 5 hours worth of content into 90 minutes feels like things will be rushed and we won’t get a good story.

- HOW do you take a month to rewrite six 45 minute long scripts into a movie length feature and have it still be good?!

- the compression of the story means we will likely not get any more flashback sequences. Admittedly I actually thought we probably wouldn’t get more flashback scenes in season 3 anyway, but this definitely proves the case that we won’t. There won’t be time for it.

- who has re-written the script? Because here’s the thing about Pratchett adaptations. They’re fucking shit. No one (in my opinion) has been able to successfully transfer that man’s unique sense of humour and writing style onto screen. Every single Discworld adaptation has been on a scale of awful to kind of meh. EXCEPT for season 1 of Good Omens. As much as we hate him now. As vile as he has become in our hearts, the thing about NG is that he understood Terry’s unique style. He understood what worked and how to transfer that to the screen. And that breaks my heart on so many levels. Because he was all we had. And we certainly didn’t want him any more. But still, who THE FUCK has written the finale script now?

Now here are my positive thoughts on the situation:

- NEIL GAIMAN GOT HIS SORRY ASS FIRED! GOOD!

- Consequences. The industry has signalled consequences. Finally!

- We are getting a conclusion! It could very well have been cancelled and we would have been left with the final 15 forever. We get to see them again. That deserves a Wahoo!

- thinking back over season 2, which I enjoyed, I actually do have to say a lot of it was kind of unnecessary filler. The flashback sequences were great. But the actual core of the season’s arc involving Gabriel was just a bit boring. I’m forever grateful for it because we got to spend almost 6 hours watching Aziraphale give Crowley heart eyes and Crowley do beautiful acts of service proving his love back. But the meandering stuff with Nina and Maggie and trying to work out why Gabriel lost his memory wasn’t all that interesting. I was here for A&C.

- so I think MAYBE that means the compression of what had already been written for season 3 means it’ll cut out the plot bits that drag. Hopefully this means it’s faster paced and tighter and more focused on A&C.

Speculations:

Thinking back to the last time NG interacted with the fandom, he had confirmed the first three episodes were written and were with Amazon for approval, episode 4 was almost done, the last part of episode 6 had been written, and he had started plotting episode 5. We never got a confirmation if he ever finished them. So this maybe indicates that the finale is lifted exactly out of these scripts. My assumption is they’ve brought in a script doctor to edit what they’ve already got and wrap up plot points. In which case, on the one hand it gives us close to the story and idea of what Terry imagined. On the other, the far more negative connotation, it’s still NG’s work. The articles that have all come out so far merely states “Gaiman is not involved with the production and the finale is based on his work”. This could be Prime distancing themselves without actually confirming how he’s contributed. Which is still largely disappointing.

So, once again I feel very conflicted. A lot of the fandom have been very adamant about not wanting to support the show if Gaiman was involved, and in the end he wrote the show. Even if he had been removed as producer and showrunner and wasn’t allowed on set (thankfully it seems all three of things have happened), I know that wouldn’t have been enough for some fans because he would still have ultimately been responsible for the product that we eventually see. And I don’t know how to feel about that.

I’m happy he’s gone, I’m disappointed the show has been gutted, I’m glad we get a conclusion, I’m sad it won’t be exactly what we wanted.

I’m SO THANKFUL that the women get some semblance of justice, that there is a consequence for a perpetrator, that a big ass company is finally listening to fans and moving with the times and signally this kind of behaviour isn’t appropriate and that repercussions can and will be felt.

Finally, I’ll remind everyone that there are going to be a lot of different and conflicting feelings from the fandom. I would ask that everyone try to be nice to one another. If you have a differing opinion, maybe rather than debating it you just allow that person their feelings and move on. Do not go after someone if you feel like they’re not reacting the “right way” to the situation. Just be kind please. It’s what Terry would have wanted.