#fraude au president

[bitchalotl]

Harbingers in an unhinged modern-day AU I just cooked up:

Pierro - Bitter ex-minister of the German empire. Tried to prevent ww1 and failed miserably. Went into exile during the years of the Weimar Republic. Current prime minister of the Russian Federation.

Dottore - Infamous Egyptian scientist. Expelled from multiple universities due to faults against ethics. Currently wanted by the egyptian government. Fled the country with the help of the CIA. Later, they betrayed them for the KGB. May or may not have been involved in the creation of supersoldiers Capitano and Columbina as well as the tampering with decomisoned Android model Scaramouche.

Capitano - Early soviet attempt at the creation of a supersoldier following the devastation of ww2 and the tensions of the cold war. Unconfirmed involvement in the soviet invasion of Afghanistan during the 80s and the russian invasion of Ukraine.

Columbina - Escaped soviet experiment. Thought to be an attempt at a new generation of supersoldier. Abandoned after the collapse of the soviet union due to a lack of funding. Subsequently, It escaped russian facilities and presumably remained at large.

Arlecchino - French ww2 orphan. Recruited as a Paris based spy by the KGB during the cold war. Alleged mass murderer. Current director of russian espionage after allegedly murdering the previous director.

Pulcinella - Ex-communist sellout. Has been the mayor of Moscow for many, many years. Regularly accused of electoral fraud.

Scaramouche - Runaway android. Created by the founder of Shogun Robotics. Declared faulty and destined for decommissioning. Vanished from Japan years ago and may have been found in Russia and tampered with by Dottore. Shogun Robotics has since forgotten about this failed model and now produces the aptly named "Shogun" model.

Signora - Former German academic turned mass murderer following the death of her husband, who was a soldier in the French front of ww1. On an unrelated note, the russian ambassador to Germany has an uncanny resemblance to her.

Sandrone - Founder, CEO, and senior engineer of Marionette Technologies. Her technology and weapons manufacturing empire has the russian federation as its biggest client. Her personal information remains a mystery since she does not appear in public. Rival firm of Shogun Robotics.

Pantalone - Current governor of the Central Bank of Russia and former economy minister of the Russian Federation. Has a distinct and fierce hatred of Chinese economic policy. Labeled an oligarch by Western observations. The single wealthiest man in all of Russia.

Childe - Formerly a normal russian kid living in the Ural's region. He became extremely violent and bloodthirsty after an accident where he got lost in the mountains due to heavy blizzards. Eagerly joined the russian armed forces and has since become their poster boy. Has an unwavering loyalty for Russia and it's president.

Tsaritza - Current president of the Russian Federation. Her ancestors were nobility in the times of the russian empire. Is mockingly called "the Tsaritza" by political adversaries and Western press.

[kiyomitakada]

also kiyomi and misa are still feuding in the high school AU (probably over light but it'd be really funny if it was something else, like misa playing tiktoks out loud) and this culminates in a plotline where kiyomi runs for president of the student council and misa decides to run against her because kiyomi will obviously be a horrible president and make their dress code even stricter and misa can't allow this to happen (no kiyo-chan it's not "petty" or "immature" misa is making a STAND for JUSTICE) (what do you mean "commitments to the electorate" you're making up words). she makes campaign posters with rem. light refuses to take a side which makes both kiyomi and misa mad at him. halfway through misa realizes that there is no way she's pulling this off without some good old election fraud so she starts trying to hack into the school database. unfortunately misa does not have any actual hacking skills; fortunately she is very familiar with the dark web and in the process accidentally stumbles on evidence that the principal has been accepting bribes from rich parents to boost their kids' grades. her immediate glee turns into soul crushing rage when she realizes kiyomi is not on the list of kids being boosted and she complains about it to light who is like HOLY SHIT MISA WE HAVE TO LEAK THIS TO THE NEWS IMMEDIATELY

[randombookposts]

Canaan University Au

Ok I thought of a college au for the locked tomb a awhile ago but I never bothered to write it down until now. Anyways I think they would all go to this imaginary university in New Zealand and it’s like the first book but with a lot less murder. Here’s what I think each house would study

Judith- Criminal justice major. Huge stickler for rules and doing homework. If she’s not in the gym reading a textbook while doing push-ups, she’s in the library getting into a heated debate with a Corona. Had a huge crush on Marta and went to the same college as her to hangout, just getting over it, may or may not have feelings for Corona, maybe.

Marta- In law school, was a mentor to Judith when she was in high school and that’s how they know each other. Gently turned Judith down but they’re still friends and study together sometime. Is the DD at every party.

Corona: Majoring in marketing with a minor in fashion merchandising. Doesn’t do great on tests but aces every presentation. President of her sorority. Can and will gaslight frat boys. Everyone wants her but she only has eyes for the stuck up criminal justice major.

Ianthe- Management major with a minor in maybe finance. Commits tax fraud and gets away with it. Sometimes does Corona’s homework for her. Doxxes people online (mostly Babs), smokes in the dorm hallways. Flirts with Harrow during their study sessions, which Harrow ignores.

Naberius- Economics major, and major fuck boy. Makes thirst traps and is doxxed. Hangs out with the twins even though they bully him. Doesn’t do shit during group projects. Will get a job at his dads company post graduation.

Jeannemary and Isaac don’t go to college but are tutored by Abigail at her house. They just silly teens who experiment with makeup and clothes to find their look. Talk loudly about anime in the school hallways. A little cringe but they’re doing their best.

Abigail- Anthropology professor and is really cool. Tough grader but genuinely loves her students and shares trivia with them. Brings donuts to test days. Will accidentally derail class to talk about books or her husband. If one of her students brings up one of the incredibly niche topics she likes, she will talk about it for hours.

Magnus- Not a teacher but visits Abigail's classes often. Nice guy, helps look after Jeannemary and Isaac. I'm not sure what he would do as a job, maybe chef or stay at home husband lol. Regardless, he's the one making all the meals.

Palamedes- Pre-med, wants to become a doctor so he can save Dulcinea save people. Smartest guy in the room always, a go to for anyone struggling with their biology homework. Has a friendly rivalry with Harrow (it's more rivalry than friendly for Harrow but she grows fond of him over time). Is the one derailing class with philosophical debates.

Camilla- Physics major, too cool for you. Really into sports, just not sure which, like gymnastics or soccer or rugby or fencing. Works hard but actually remembers to eat and sleep too. Probably in student government as well. Her and Palamedes are attached at the hip, they later get an apartment together and that's where all the main hangouts with the other characters happen.

Dulcinea- Suffers from chronic illness and focuses her life on learning and traveling rather than getting a traditional job. She's got multiple degrees in stuff like literature, philosophy, and art history. She is active on social media and has a blog, and sells crocheted animals on Etsy. Became mutuals with Pal and Camilla on social media and they met up later when they went off to college.

Protesilaus- Dulcie's caretaker, helps her with her medical stuff. Becomes like a cool uncle figure to her and her friends. Hangs out a lot with Ortus and they share poetry.

Silas- Double major in theology and philosophy. Freaky teen prodigy who graduated high school early and attends university. Little shit who people are either freaked out by or straight up just don't like him. Will snitch on anyone for anything he doesn't like. Really only friends with Colum.

Colum- Silas' nephew, but way older than him, weird dynamic. Not in school but drives Silas to his classes and Silas lives with him during the school year instead of in the dorms. Nice guy, looks out for Silas' well being the best he can but tries to keep him from being too nasty to others.

Harrow- Double major in theology and archeology. Studies at all hours and forgets to eat and sleep. Local cryptid. Autistic with special interests in religion and burial rituals. Went to Catholic school and had a suffocating home life. Trying to grapple with that as she starts to navigate adult life. Also trying to mend her relationship with Gideon after being so harsh in her younger years.

Gideon- Kinesiology major, butch vibes to the max. Does swordfighting and weight training in her down time. Has kissed both Ianthe and Corona at some point, though it never went anywhere after that. Wears her sunglasses at all times even in class. Finds the worst fashions from thrift stores and wears them to piss Harrow off. Grew up with Harrow in a foster home Harrow's parents ran and also attended Catholic school with her but they rarely interacted beyond antagonizing each other. Reconnected after being randomly assigned roommates. Now they're buddies and hang out alongside the 3rd and 6th, (also the 2nd and Dulcie sometimes too). They all do stupid shit together like sing karoke off key and hit up Taco Bell at 2am after binge watching movies.

[nobody-nexus]

Okay so... I have an AU idea for TADC

So seeing all of these AUs for TADC around gave me an idea for one, and if I get enough positive feedback I'll probably draw stuff about it. The name for it is called The Sinful Circus AU. The concept is that the digital circus is a prison for some of the worst prisoners of all. Each one of the circus members are themed after one of the seven deadly sins, and their crime reflected of that. (Note: Lust, in this context, is NOT sexual- but more manipulation. Please keep that in mind)

Caine was the very first prisoner forced to put on the headset. He was Specimen 0, and therefore in there the longest. So long that he forgot he was even a human being in the first place, instead thinking he's an omnipresent AI. His real name is Camerom Ringler, and his sin was Pride. Crimes he committed involve fraud, identity theft, use of illegal substances, and various other unknown crimes

The second longest lasting prisoner is an older man named Roman Kingston, and his sin was Greed, using his royal status as a prince to steal from thousands of people. The circus made him insane, and now he's just in his own world, claiming a small portion of the place as 'his kingdom' while not being all quite there at the same time

The next was a woman named Amanda Dollie, who's sin was Sloth. She was the head secretary for the president at the time of her sentence, but she hadn't been a good one. She made a number of short cuts which lead to a near economic collapse. The circus pushes her around often, even though she can be put back together easily, it's still painful and hard to handle a lot of the time

Next was Jackson Conejito. His sin was Lust, but not in the way most think when hearing that. It was an intense longing for hatred and to cause havoc and chaos, becoming a menace DUE to this longing. Robbery, breaking and entering, and arson to name a few- this longing to give others hate grew more and more until he was finally caught. He's the least affected within the circus, but his bunny like appearance was a more ironic punishment

Soon enough the next one was a girl named Grace Mezzanine- who's sin was Envy. Due to her front of being a constantly happy and cheery person, most were surprised when it turned out that the lovable woman was a murderer- killing people who upset her or made herself conscious and jealous. Her love for musical theater taught her how to act, so her circus body being just as spineless as she was made the most sense

Second to last was Zoe Clash, who's biggest sin was Gluttony. They couldn't get enough attention, being the most well-known sinful criminal. A media star that, due to being so obsessed with beauty and being the center of attention, lead to the second most deaths even if indirectly. To match the ugliness in their heart, they turned into something that's hard to describe aside from 'unnatural' and 'mismatching'

The last currently alive, and the most recent of them all, was Polina Shutnik. Not much was known about the woman. She was born in Russia but grew up fully American. She caused the most deaths out of the people stuck in there. Anything that's considered a weapon will put the normally tired and anxious woman into a murdering machine until she passes out or the item is ripped from her hands. She's also the one who remembers the least about herself in the circus. All she remembers is having a headset put onto her head. She takes the form of a jester, confused and scared whilst looking for a way out

These seven aren't the only ones who were put in here, but most abstract into torturous monsters that the coders that keep them within use to hurt them constantly. Abstraction happens when the human body of the prisoner dies, and the headset isn't taken off within seconds after their death

These seven prisoners, here to live the rest of their lives within this digital torment... Or maybe not

(If you have any thoughts for this AU- let me know! I wanna work on this more because I find the idea cool and interesting!)

[aurevoirmonty]

«L’Ukraine est une machine à blanchir l’argent» du complexe militaro-industriel et de l’élite de Washington: le ministre de la Justice de Trump s’attaquera-t-il au clan Biden?

«Ce que veulent obtenir ces entrepreneurs de la défense, c'est vers une guerre à faible rendement, mais à long terme, d’avoir une guerre de 20 ou 30 ans», explique Matt Gaetz.

Et que si nous avions encore l'Afghanistan pour blanchir de l'argent, il ne serait probablement pas nécessaire de s'impliquer autant en Ukraine.

Selon un rapport du FBI (https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12320527/RELEASED-FBI-document-detailing-alleged-10M-Biden-bribery-scheme-publicized-Republicans-Burisma-CEO-Zlochevsky-called-Hunter-stupid-necessary-board-dad-Vice-President-Joe-Biden-protect-problems.html), la société pétrolière et gazière ukrainienne Burisma a versé à Hunter et Joe Biden chacun 5 millions de dollars en pots-de-vin.

Ces pots-de-vin s'ajoutaient aux plus de 4 millions de dollars au total versés à Hunter Biden et à son partenaire commercial Devon Archer, condamné (https://lanouvelletribune.info/2022/03/usa-un-proche-du-fils-de-biden-condamne-pour-fraude/) à de la prison en mars 2022.

[dykeyaoi]

something that's very interesting to me is that in almost any iteration of MP100 (but in this case specifically ageswap versus canon), certain characters (in this case whoever end up being the adults) have to fail miserably in their lives before they can even begin to interact with other characters within the story.

in canon, Serizawa has to grow up as a shut-in and not have any confidence in himself or his powers and get picked up by Claw as a result. Mogami has to spiral into being a horrible person and become the reason for his mom's death and become a shell of an evil spirit. Reigen has to grow up without friends and build up his persona and boister his fake confidence and become distant from his family and be a fraud. none of them could meet the kids and go through everything in the story that fixes them if they didn't fail in the things that they most wanted to overcome first.

in an ageswap AU, Teru has to never meet Mob and grow up thinking he's better than other people and never need anyone to actually like him because he lives alone and can just make them anyway. Mob has to suppress his powers and have no one to tell him things that he'll realize are wrong and not have a mentor and not do well in school and not rely on anyone because he's scared of what he'll do to them if he does. Ritsu has to be scared of his brother and they have to grow apart because they end up being wildly different and eventually he switches honorifics to Onii-san and kind of dreads talking to Shige because they both failed.

in canon, you watch Mob have every person who cares about him be taken away and his falling apart at the seams when they are-- expected, as he's the kid. but you also watch Reigen realize that he doesn't have anyone because he won't let people get close. you see Serizawa lose control when his umbrella is taken away because the president gave it to him and he needs that because god knows people aren't so constant!

in an ageswap AU, you can fix Reigen and Serizawa and even Mogami and Toichiro if you're really intent on it. in an ageswap you can have Teru meet Mob through business but you can also bring a shy, kind of self-doubting Tome to Spirits & Such because she hears a rumor about telepathy. she still wears aliens on her socks but finds the smallest incessant shame in it because her club got torn down as soon as it was made clear that she was the only one who cared about them. you can have Mob spot a grown-up, successful Tsubomi in the streets and freeze up and be too nervous to say hi to her. you can see Shou the struggling single father of a kid he doesn't know how to handle.

the adults all have to fail at first because the point of Mob Psycho is that you have to let the other people in your life change you. you have to let them in because feedback with a sample size of oneself is not enough to judge and base one's thoughts & actions on. they're the kind of characters that cannot exist without each other because they make one another into who they are.

[artzychic27]

What if in the favoritism au, Socqueline was Marinette’s right hand woman and was the only one who knew about her real personality but didn’t really care because she saw herself in Marinette in a way?

Socqueline is just as bad as Marinette, hell, maybe worse. She ran for student body President to keep the outcast students in line and is doing everything in her power to make sure no Marinette has no competition for when she runs

She helps Marinette by taking part in tormenting Marc by assisting in the dress codes and making it so he can’t wear his ripped jeans

And she implemented a “Best Buddies” system for the school, making it so he could no longer sit alone during study hall and write and was forced to spend time with a student who knowingly tortures him on Marinette’s whim

And she acts as if it’s all for the good of the school’s image, when, in reality, she’s giving Marinette ideas for when she runs

In her eyes, there are The Betters like her and Marinette, and The Lessers like Marc. The Betters are the faces of the school, the athletes, the rich kids, the student government, anyone lucky to be friends with them, etc., and The Lessers are meant only to follow the rules of The Betters and no one will remember them when everyone graduates

Socqueline helps Marinette keep tabs on those she has blackmail on, all compiled in a folder on her tablet (Which never leaves her side)

And in that tablet is another folder with blackmail on current and potential students

Marc has been trying forever to get that tablet, but the walls have ears…

When Chloé eventually gets Socqueline expelled (Because student body president can’t trump Mayor’s Daughter), it’s as if a huge weight left the students shoulders, and they aren’t sure why… Yet

Still, they think Socqueline is this saint who only wanted to help them, and Chloé only got rid of her because she was Marinette’s friend

Chloé: *Walks into the bathroom to reapply her makeup. It takes her a moment to finally address Marc standing behind her* … I’m pretty sure this is the girl’s bathroom.

Marc: Don’t care. Just answer me this. Why did you do it?

Chloé: … I think we both know what will happen if DuPain-Cheng becomes president. Rules that will make school even harder for you, dress codes to keep you from wearing nothing but black, and re-instating that God-awful buddy system to make sure you’re paired up with her lapdogs.

Marc: What’s in it for you?

Chloé: *Reapplies her mascara* Well, while I have no opinions of you, I’m not quite fond of DuPain-Cheng’s behavior. It’s a little… Stalkerish? I’ve seen the way she practically drools at the sight of her obsessions, and I saw her digging through their trash cans. And… I don’t know, I guess it’s demented how she’s been treating you, Anciel.

Marc: But why do something now? Why not when she got two assholes from the basketball team to dunk my head in the toilet after I was supposedly caught taking drugs in the bathroom?

Chloé: I didn’t have a reason then. But now, I do. Adrien Agreste is coming here next year, and I know damn well that creep is going to traumatize him. What better way to ensure she can’t get what she wants than by removing her ticket to power over the school?

Marc: That’ll do nothing. These brainless sycophants worship the ground she walks on and the rest will do whatever it takes to make sure she’s president if it means making sure their secrets aren’t exposed to the city.

Chloé: Up for a little voter fraud?

Marc: I’m listening.

[corporatefrog]

╰┈➤ Welcome Back to the Channel part 29; like and subscribe

✧.* featuring yn setting up for their newest youtube video when a few unexpected guests arrive : ̗̀➛ notes - this is the last chapter! thank you guys so much for joining me during the journey of this story. I haven't finished a fic in years so it feels so good to write that final line. I left it pretty open ended to be ready for extra chapters in the future!! I could say a bunch more about how thankful I am for people reading this story and how much it's help me work through the past month but i'll let the chapter do that :) tags - college au, superhero au, smau

series masterlist previous | next

Okay. Let’s do this. 

“Hey guys! We’ve got a really special video today!” I greeted with a beaming grin, micking a high five with the camera. So far so good. “We’re going to be doing an interview I’ve been waiting to make for a long time…” I paused for effect before moving to the side, revealing today’s special guest. 

“Say hello to Mysterion!” I exclaimed with applause. I’d add some cheering effects while editing but without it, it sounded a bit empty. 

Looking back at Kenny, a laugh burst from my mouth at the expression on his face. He’d twisted his mouth into some semblance of a smirk but with the mask he looked cool and suave and more like he’d just smelled a three day old diaper. 

“Dude, what is that face? You look fucking stupid.” I said between laughs. Kenny frowned, giving me a side eye. 

“I’ve got a reputation to uphold!” He whined, gesturing to the dark hooded costume, “You don’t get it because you just started using your persona-”

“KENNY! Just say my social security number too why don’t you-” The frame shook as I lunged forward to stop the recording before any more secrets were shared on camera.

It had been about a few months since I’d started working with Butters and the guys would not let me forget they had seniority in the hero/villain world. Every chance Clyde had, he reminded me that he was there when they fought Cthulhu. Of course, Kyle was close behind to say that Clyde had done absolutely nothing during that fight. But that was followed by Kyle reminding me that he was sent to hell and was there during the eldritch battle.

I’d been worried when they found out that they’d stop talking to me altogether. I wasn’t quite sure why. They’ve known about Butters being Professor Chaos since they were children and I see him and Kenny hang out more than he hangs out with Kyle and Stan sometimes. He even hangs out with Craig and his group on the weekends. 

The only thing that’s been hurt by my employment at Chaos LLC is my intel source. Wendy stopped giving me insider details about hero movements if they related to Professor Chaos so I haven’t been able to cover as much of his antics but she was still queuing me into other run-ins with minor villains and typical South Park oddities. 

Last week, fucking Slenderman showed up. Like a tall faceless dude in a suit and tie Slenderman. Just standing in the park. He did kidnap Butters which led to an interesting rescue mission. And the video coverage was insane. Marble Hornets could never. 

I didn’t want to trust it at first. I’d spent a month waiting for things to suddenly change. For everyone to turn on me for being a minor inconvenience at best but Craig still asked me to help him with his stats homework at Tweek Bros and Stan still invited me to whatever random board game shop he was visiting that week. The only thing that changed was sometimes we ran around the city in (if I’m being honest) ridiculous costumes and blew off some of the steam that comes with being a college student at Garrison University. 

The entire college almost shut down last month due to Dean Garrison being convicted of tax fraud and publicly attempting to assassinate the President in order to avoid charges. Without anyone to lead the college and the name now permanently connected to an elementary school teacher turned assassin, the only option seemed to be shutting the place down. That was a rough month. The university was literally on the verge of closure and I still had to write a 10 page research paper. What kind of bullshit is that?

Yeah but it was a paper about The Bachelor so was it really work?

Anything that involves citing in APA is work. 

The routine of my new normal set in pretty quickly. Well, as ‘normal’ as things can be when you’re friends with superheroes in South Park. I went to my classes, made videos for my channel, then I’d meet up with Butters and ruin a few people’s day a few times a week. It was scary how easily I fell into the routine. I’d wake up and say good morning to Stan as though he weren’t shooting tranquilizer darts from a nail gun at me a few hours earlier. Certainly not a sentence I ever thought I’d say. 

Looking back on the past two years, I see all the chances I had to end up somewhere else. If I’d gone to a different university and never set foot in South Park or if I’d chosen a different apartment and never ran into Clyde on my first day there I could have led a completely different life. Even in the moments which dragged on my mind, they all led me here. And the feeling of comfort that comes along with that thought makes every struggle worthwhile. 

There’s nowhere I’d rather be and here. Attending a university with an idiot dean, living in an apartment building with my closest friends, and now helping someone I care about get the revenge he’s due. Oh, and making youtube videos about all the stupid shit that happens along the way.

I restarted the recording, giving Kenny a warning glare before saying the intro again. This time, he kept a normal face which made it much easier to not think about how just a few months ago, I was freaking out at the idea of talking to THE Mysterion. 

Granted, now we’ve seen THE Mysterion vomiting in a toilet at 2 am after eating his taco bell too fast so the shimmer has faded. 

“So, Mysterion,” I started, glancing at my list of questions I’d prepared for the interview, “You’ve been the longest running hero in South Park history! How does it feel to be coming up on 10 years as South Park’s Guardian Angel?”

Kenny hummed as he mulled over the question, “It’s not an easy job-” A knock on the door cut off his answer. I looked over at Kenny with a confused expression. He mirrored my confusion but couldn’t offer an idea on who was interrupting our interview for the second time. 

I paused the video before heading over to the door, looking through the peephole. Toolshed’s signature belt gave him away instantly. He shifted from foot to foot as he waited, tapping his hands against his thighs. 

What the fuck?

I opened the door, leaning against the frame while I deadpanned at my neighbor. 

“What’re you doing?” I asked, looking at him from under my eyebrows. 

Stan flashed a sheepish smile, “Well, I heard that you were interviewing Ken-” He paused, glancing down the hall both ways before correcting himself, “Mysterion today and I was thinking I could join? I haven’t gotten an interview yet after all.” 

“You haven’t gotten an interview because all you’ve done the past three fights is stand in the back with a power drill looking lost.” I pulled up my phone and held it up for Stan to see the footage from the past three hero conflicts. While Kenny and Craig dove into the fray, Stan could be seen in the background, searching through his utility belt for the right tool for the battle. By the time he held up his weapon of choice, Craig would be throwing the final punch.

“Okay those videos are rigged. You got those from the Craig fan accounts.” Stan protested. 

“You’re really reaching now bud-” 

“Is there still time for the interview?” A voice shouted from down the hall. Kyle’s door flew open with him rushing out soon after. The kite strapped to his back caught on the door frame, sending him tripping and falling into the wall across the hall from his door. I sighed, rubbing a hand over my face while the sound of Kyle cursing and tripping over his own stupid fucking costume filled the hallway. 

“Dude what are you doing?” Stan asked, crossing his arms as though he were the one being put upon by the appearance of the Human Kite. Kyle righted himself, brushing imaginary dust off his costume. 

“You said you were going to try and get in on the interview and after my last one-” He gave me a pointed look as though I were the one who chose his stupid name in the first place, “turned into me being berated for an hour and a half.” 

“Yeah but you already had one. It’s my turn now.” Stan whined. 

“Actually, it’s my turn right now.” Kenny said, suddenly appearing behind me at the door. I jumped to the side, holding a hand over my chest to keep my heart from jumping out at the shock. 

“Jesus fuck man. I need to put a bell on you.” I muttered to myself before addressing the slowly growing group of complaining superheroes, “None of you guys get to decide whose turn it is to be on my channel. I set up this interview with Kenny a month ago and we’re finally getting to filming so if you want to have ‘your turn’ you need to fill out the form and join the queue like everyone else. I’ve got Craig and Tweek lined up for next month then Tolkien-”

“How the fuck does Tolkien get to go before me-”

“Because he filled out the fucking form Stan? I literally just told you.” 

“Okay, well I just think it would be more interesting to have Toolshed on before Tupperware.” Stan looped his thumbs through his utility belt, kicking a foot at the ground with a frown tugging at his lips. He looked up at me with pouting eyes, blinking rapidly as he tried to change my mind.

No way this 20 year old is pouting in the hallway right now. 

I blew a breath out of the corner of my mouth, averting my eyes from the pouting college student. I better not regret this. 

“Okay, fine.” I started. Stan’s posture immediately improved as he straightened up and began to walk towards the door. Kyle followed suit with a borderline giddy smile of his own. I held up a hand to stop them, “But this is a one time thing, okay? Don’t go telling the others you can just bug me into doing a video with them because I know Clyde can and will be the most annoying motherfucker to ever exist until I do an entire series about him.” 

Kyle and Stan nodded rapidly, heads moving in sync as they agreed to whatever would get them in the video. I was about to move aside and let them in when Kenny sucked in a breath. 

“We weren’t supposed to tell other people about this?” He asked. When I turned to stare at him, he plastered an awkwardly large grin on his face. 

“Who did you tell?” I asked, holding my breath out of fear for what he’d say next. Kenny paused, eyes moving across the ceiling as he thought over the question. That’s never a good sign. Then he began counting on his fingers, mouth moving in silent words as he continued to tick off different unknown names. 

Letting his hands fall with a shrug, he looked back at me with the still incredibly awkward smile, “Only like a few of the guys-” 

“MUAHAHAHA, THIS IS WHERE YOU FALL MYSTERION!” Butters came barreling in through my balcony doors, fists raised to the sky as he posed in the living room. The four of us turned to look at the villain. 

“False alarm, Butters. Apparently this was a lowkey thing.” Kenny said, pointing to me with his thumb as though I were the buzzkill in the situation. My jaw dropped as I turned to Kenny, appalled that he had the audacity to claim I was ruining our private interview I’d spent a month planning. 

Butters’ arms fell back to his sides, tinfoil of his gauntlets scraping slightly against his belt, “Awe geez, and here I was ready for a scuffle.” He said, scuffing the toe of his boot against the floor in a similar pout to Stan’s from moments before. 

Why am I friends with a bunch of toddlers? 

Before I could address Butters’ appearance, my apartment was flooded with the rest of my friends all clad in their hero costumes. Tolkien waddled behind Tweek and Craig, turning sideways to get through the door with Clyde following close behind. Soon my apartment was filled with arguing superheroes and one very boisterous villain, all trying to figure out how to fit themselves into the frame. 

I squeezed myself onto the couch between Kenny and Clyde, feeling like I should at least have the original planned video guest in the middle of the frame. Voices overlapped as Stan tried to shove Kyle over, pushing Tweek and Craig further to the side. The cacophony of sound bounced off the walls and made the air buzz with the rambunctious energy. 

Normally the noise would send me spiraling, overstimulated by the different sounds all pulling me in different directions, but the noise around me calmed the normally racing thoughts in my mind. I’d spent so long sitting in front of this camera, reading off new stories of the people who now shouted my name to grab my attention from opposite ends of the couch I’d gotten off Facebook Marketplace. The once deafening silence which filled the moments between takes was replaced by shouts to move over and accusations of stepping on their kite string. 

It was the best noise I’d ever heard. 

“I’m starting now! Everyone shut up and follow me lead!” I announced, stabilizing the camera before returning to my spot with a smile.

I smiled for the camera. I smiled at the thought of the views a video with all of South Park’s heroes would get. But I also smiled from the overwhelming happiness that came from being surrounded by my closest friends. 

“Hey guys!” I greeted, raising a hand to mimic a high five with the lens,

“Welcome back to the channel!”

taglist [reply to be added]: @sula0kin @lacuna-at-dawn @anglettecolours @cocolena@sukisprettyface @feverish-dove @sweetadonisbutbetter @hand-writxen@mishstuff@sophtophie @triphovia  @lacunaanonymoused @inkedintothepaper @toodeepintofandoms@mmmaackerel @sillybilly-123@n0tangeliccc@sophtophie@inkedintothepaper 

[the-server-gods]

MORTALS. WE HAVE SEEN THAT YOU APPRECIATE “POLLS” AND “VOTING.” WHILE WE DO NOT UNDERSTAND, WE HAVE CREATED A GAME FOR YOU TO VOTE IN.

Welcome to the Dominionerds Sexyman Bracket! In which we will be voting on which Dominionerds character is the most mayor candidate president overlord sexyman.

Additional information under the cut:

Matches are as follows:

Round 1:

Woe verses The Man

Lich!Broker verses The Flame

Cyraneus verses The Horrors

Aero verses Mildew

Jesse (Newer Mexico Noname) verses Ophelia

Biscuit the Abysscat verses The Lighthouse Keeper

The Tailor verses Shadowmech

Frank Truth verses Rem

W4RD3N verses Trash Wizard’s Hat

Skeleton Queen verses Void Beast Queen

Noname verses Pre-Dominionerds Queen

Highschool AU Queen verses Mildred Dew (Newer Mexico Mildew)

Nominees:

Lukas - 9 Votes

Broker - 8 Votes

Queen - 8 Votes

Server Gods - 6 Votes

Leontids - 5 Votes

Vandium - 5 Votes

Fish - 4 Votes

Queen (Warden) - 4 Votes

The Void - 4 Votes

Jerma - 3 Votes

The Void Beasts - 3 Votes

Bug - 2 Votes

Eidolon - 2 Votes

Flea - 2 Votes

Milo - 2 Votes

Jesse (Newer Mexico Noname) - 2 Votes

The President of Newer Mexico - 2 Votes

Pilot - 2 Votes

Ridley - 2 Votes

Woe - 2 Votes

Queen (Pre-Nerds) - 2 Votes

Aero - 1 Vote

Biscuit the Abysscat - 1 Vote

Broker (Lich) - 1 Vote

Crimson - 1 Vote

Cyraneus - 1 Vote

Frank Truth - 1 Vote

Mildew - 1 Vote

Mildred Dew (Newer Mexico Mildew) - 1 Vote

Noname - 1 Vote

Ophelia - 1 Vote

Rem - 1 Vote

Queen (HS AU) - 1 Vote

Queen (Skeleton) - 1 Vote

Queen (Void Beast) - 1 Vote

Shadowmech - 1 Vote

The Flame - 1 Vote

The Horrors - 1 Vote

The Man - 1 Vote

The Tailor - 1 Vote

The Lighthouse Keeper - 1 Vote

Trash Wizard's Hat - 1 Vote

Vikingpilot - 1 Vote

W4RD3N (Hopperhawks/Hubris) - 1 Vote

Polls will be out whenever they get done. likely tomorrow (2/9) Propaganda, bribery, and voter fraud are encouraged. May the sexiest nerd win.

[mangatxt]

hellooo i'm here for the writing asks!! can i geeeet 2 and 17? (and also 50 if u wish because i'm nosy)

2. Go to your AO3 “Works” page, to the sidebar with all the filters, and click the drop-down arrow for “Additional Tags.” What are your top 3-5 most used tags? Do you think they accurately represent your writing habits?

HIIII ROB, you asked me the stats question. bless <3

out of 24 works (18 slash, 6 gen), i got:

Humor (8)

Getting Together (7)

Post-Canon (6) / Canon Compliant (6)

Established Relationship (4) / Mutual Pining (4)

Case Fic (3) / Blow Jobs (3) / Psychic Abilities (3) / Found Family (3)

honestly, this seems pretty accurate if a bit low all-around? i might not have tagged my older fics all that well.

i think the only thing i'm surprised about is that Established Relationship is tied with Mutual Pining. nothing else is rly sticking out to me.

i told you guys i wrote a disproportionate number of bjs this yr

17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it?

android au. i wish that one guy would write it already.

i think i already divulged my reishuuto x 1980s lehman bros au but that's here if anyone else wants to write it for me

for serirei, i've also always wanted to read a 90s blockbuster/video store AU, but i don't think i have the requisite knowledge to write it. same goes for weatherman!reigen and producer!serizawa. i think they'd be really fun reads.

but i think the most Specific thing i'd like to find someday is a heist-movie-esque fic with the S&S office. maybe they're stealing a highly-cursed artifact from a museum b/c the museum curator won't let them interact with it long enough to exorcize it? something like that. whatever the premise -- man, i would love to read that fic sljdklj

50. Answer any question of your choice, or talk about anything you want to talk about!

i'm gonna tell you my favorite incredibly-silly joke from TPC. it's from a voicemail from reigen's mom in chapter 6:

“You have to understand, the neighbors are talking about this. They asked about you at my water aerobics class the other day. They said, is your son really running for president of that creepy organization? “I didn’t know what to say! And you know how rare it is that I’m rendered speechless! I know you take after me. “At the end of the day, you have to think about other people. Think about your father’s job! He doesn’t want to answer questions about this. He has work to do. As you might have heard, the Federal Register for Activities and Urban Designations has been angling to rename Seasoning City Square to Seasoning City Circle for weeks now. As you can imagine, some people are bent out of shape about this, so he’s very stressed. That’s why I’m drawing a line.

gratuitous shape puns aside, my favorite joke is that reigen's dad works for FRAUD.

ask me about my writing!

[one-strugling-bean]

DSMP Fanfic Rec List because I’m bored - part 1

(IF YOU READ ANY OF THESE, DON'T FORGET TO COMMENT - even a simple "great work" or "this was a lot of fun" suffices, just  comment)

Manburg vs Pogtopia Era (lots of Manburg cabinet, Pumpkin Duo, and Schlatt studies)

depressing final moments for an equally depressing man by cottageaddict

Your chest aches, a twinge you can’t quite place shooting through your ribs, and all you can do is sigh and lift the bottle to your lips once again.

“Are you- Are you drinking?!”

-

I’m a big fan of 2nd person narration and this particular work delivers it beautifully. I also adore the way they wrote Schlatt - the fear of death, the understanding and semi-acceptance of all the wrongs he’s done to everybody, and his response to it all being just Well fuck *proceeds to drink more* - he’s so very much in character.

That very specific, and honestly pretty fucking sad implication at the end hit me in a way I wasn’t expecting too, actually-

___

I Will Sing No Requiem by Rjeealdleyr 

"Fundy wouldn't cry for Wilbur."

-

#cfundydeservesbetter

I second the author by saying we don’t have enough Fundy fics in this fandom, so here is one. Be prepared for angsty angst!!

___

Exorcise My Fat Old Heart by orojiratsu

On the day you die the sun is beaming.

OR: The death of a villain.

-

More of Schlatt’s POV for November 16th and more 2nd person. This one is written so tragically and in such short sentences, it feels like a poem. Needless to say, I like it a lot.

___

Welcome Home, Theseus. by orojiratsu 

Schlatt is their president, and they will stay by his side. 

-

Aka, an AU where Schlatt tries to get over his alcoholism with the help of those around him and the Manburg Cabinet actually works out. Sooooooo, basically S1 heaven for me.

You get it all: functional pumpkin duo, dadschlatt with Tubbo and Fundy, Tommy getting away from Pogtopia!Wilbur, a happy, hopeful ending- 

When I say that in the DSMP, Schlatt is the character that could have had it all and changed the course of the the story towards a much brighter future, this fic is what I mean.

That last chapter always gets me, i swear-

___

The Nation That Got Better by lb1412 (WIP)

In one world, L’Manberg is no more, its citizens are divided and its enemies reign supreme.

In another world, however, there is still hope.

In another world, a traveller comes with a message, a warning, an omen.

In another world, everything depends on Schlatt.

And maybe, just maybe, there is hope left for him too.

Come, gather around, everyone, for I am about to tell you the tale of the nation that got better.

-

OR, Schlatt gets a visit from a certain time traveller the night before the election and that changes a few things in the lore’s future.

Basically, it's just more Manburg Cabinet working out, although slightly differently and taking longer. I love the broship that Pumpkin Duo has in this.

The lack of heavy angst in here is a real breath of fresh air for me, btw.

ALSO, kids are treated as kids! I repeat, kids are treated as kids!

___

Swagtopia AU by PrincessLunaLover 

It was supposed to just be a secret rescue mission. Tubbo was going to get his father free from prison and let him run into the wilderness, voter fraud charges be damned. But then Fundy found out about the fake charges, and went to Quackity for legal advice.

It wasn't supposed to end with Wilbur publicly executing his own son.

-

Ahhhhhhh Swagtopia AU, my beloved :,)

The title speaks for itself no? An AU where Wilbur cheats to win the elections and it’s all dandy and good until Fundy finds out and decides that justice should prevail.

Schlatt and Wilbur basically switch roles and with them, lots of other things change. (I love this idea so much.)

Dad!Schlatt is a thing and the Pumpkin Duo dynamic reminds me a bit of an edgier Happy Duo - that married couple who can't stop bickering. They’re great.

Fundy gets a lot of spotlight, Quackity is really intelligent and gets to show it, Techno and Schlatt are old friends, and Sweater Duo angst is a thing, so really, what else could you want??

(Also, this fic is finished, I'm not sure why it’s marked as WIP, but it might have to do with the hints to a possible sequel that just never came to be.)

Think thats it for now - happy readings :>>>

[undyingembers]

Ohh, I would love to hear more about the Wizard of Oz AU! 👀❤️

Ask me about my AUs

Tagging @forestdragoncat since they also asked for this one :)

My Through the Ashes PC Ansoc starts out as a farmhand. He's never dreamt of going on adventures himself, though he often thinks about what it would be like if he were a different person, someone more exceptional. He's also younger in this AU, in his teens like Dorothy was.

Of course, the tornado comes and takes him to the land of Oz. His house lands on the Witch of the East. The Witch of the North explains the situation to him, gives him the ruby buckles and tells him to go to the emerald city to see the Wizard. To be honest, this is an AU I didn't really develop that much. I mostly focused on my other three Pathfinder PC's (Katala, Lenarius, and Irissil), who are the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion, respectively.

There is a twist to this AU in that, unlike other versions of the Wizard of Oz, the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion are actually happy with they way they are at first. They don't accompany Ansoc to the Wizard hoping he can fix them. They have their own reasons to go to the Emerald City, as will be explained in the next paragraphs (it should also be noted that Katala, Lenarius, and Irissil are still humanoids, and not actually props/animals; they just kind of take on the themes of those items/creatures).

Ansoc meets Katala when walking past a field. Katala goes into this spiel about how being smart is overrated and that it's much easier/simpler to trust her instincts. Also, many "smart" people are just up their own asses anyway. She volunteers to help Ansoc get to the Emerald City because she sees that this kid is lost and wants to help him get home.

They meet Lenarius in a village where s/he is the presiding magistrate. They find him/her hearing the case of a rich man who engaged in fraud. The man tries to bribe Lenarius into commuting the sentence, which only makes Lenarius slap on an even larger punishment, and the bailiff takes the man away kicking and screaming. At first Ansoc and Katala enjoy the spectacle, but then the next case comes before Lenarius: a struggling innkeeper is being fined for not keeping his business up to code. The man pleads with Lenarius; his business wouldn't survive the fine he'd have to pay. Lenarius does not budge and tells him he has to pay his fine within a certain number of days or face prison. The innkeeper walks away in tears.

Ansoc and Katala are horrified and confront him/her over this decision and ask how s/he could ruin this man's life like that. Lenarius gives a speech about how his line of work requires him/her to be heartless and derides them for being so soft-hearted and that they can never hope to make the decisions s/he makes every day. However, s/he is also headed towards the Emerald City, as his/her post at the village is done, and s/he needs to deliver a report to his/her superiors. Ansoc and Katala begrudgingly take him/her along.

On their way to the Emerald City, the group has to go through the forest. When they get there, they see signs posted everywhere, detailing the various hazards and warning to stay on the path. Katala gets fed up with the signs and declares that they can get to the Emerald City much faster if they cut through the forest. Just as she veers off the path, Irissil appears and tells her that the forest is dangerous. Irissil is the ranger of the forest and has set up the numerous signs. When Katala asks if maybe Irissil is overdoing it, Irissil tells her that the world is dangerous and uncaring and how easily the careless meet untimely and preventable deaths. Irissil would rather be fastidious and alive than bold and dead. When she asks, Ansoc tells her that they are going to the Emerald City, and Irissil tells them that she might as well come along and make sure they don't die in a ditch somewhere.

The three companions are forced to rethink their ideals when Ansoc is told that he has to confront the Witch of the West before the Wizard will see him and later when Ansoc gets kidnapped by that witch. Despite having carried out his/her mission in the Emerald City, Len cannot bring him/herself to let this teenager face a powerful witch alone (of course s/he justifies his/her decision by saying that they can't let this criminal keep running loose). Katala realizes that they can't just force their way through overwhelming odds and uses a special wit she didn't know she had to overcome. Irissil has to make a snap decision and throw caution to the wind to save Ansoc's life.

It ends the same way as the Wizard of Oz. The Wizard is a fraud who can't send Ansoc home. Ansoc has to get help from another witch, who tells him to use the ruby slippers. Ansoc eventually returns home.

[rottingmanifesto]

AI! AU ramblings

The Mayor

I haven’t named this guy yet but he’s based off of Ray Nagin (NOLA’s mayor from 2002-2010) and has a… fun story. Here’s a rough timeline:

1958: born in Baton Rouge, moved to New Bordeaux shortly after birth. Came from a family of semi-modest means, with mother working in a department store and father balancing two jobs. Had 3 siblings.

1980: graduated from a New Bordeaux college (unsure what to name it but it’s likely a HBCU) with a degree in political science, eventually went into law

1984: became a lawyer (unsure what kind, maybe state prosecutor), met the Marcanos here

1989: married a woman (unnamed) and had one child together

2002: runs for mayor as a Democrat and wins

2005: Hurricane Katrina occurs, his response is notably quick and potentially saved the city (gained a lot of favor)

2006: re-elected as mayor

2010: goes back to law after his stint as mayor

2012: charged with wire fraud, money laundering, and embezzlement (and taking bribes from the Marcanos)

2015: sent to federal prison for 10+ years

Hurricane Katrina

So this is a heavier subject, but here are the stats on New Bordeaux after the failure of NOLA’s levee system:

About 500 dead, mostly impoverished citizens and the elderly (out of 2,000 that died in Louisiana in this AU— in real life it was closer to 1,500 for Louisiana)

Roughly 50% of the city was underwater

Southdowns, Downtown, French Ward, and River Row were hit the hardest

Much like in real life, then president George Bush did little to help the city— one of the biggest failures of his administration, according to some

Lincoln was shocked to see that despite the damage done to the city, the mayor (aka the Marcanos) managed to keep some infrastructure alive and going. There was relief in the familiarity, but confusion too; he was overseas by the point Katrina had hit, so he wasn’t even sure if Delray Hollow had survived the flood.

Maps

I think New Bordeaux is somewhere near, but not exactly in, New Orleans, perhaps being a bit more north. I’d put it in Jefferson Parish (Jefferson County) between NOLA and Kenner (as seen in the map below). My other thought was diagonal from Gretna, but I’m not sure.

[newstfionline]

Thursday, April 11, 2024

Canada Wants to Regulate Online Content. Critics Say It Goes Too Far. (NYT) Canada has waded into the contentious issue of regulating online content with a sweeping proposal that would force technology companies to restrict and remove harmful material, especially posts involving children, that appears on their platforms. While the intent to better monitor online content has drawn widespread support, the bill has faced intense backlash over its attempt to regulate hate speech. Critics say the proposal crosses the line into censorship.

Michigan school shooter’s parents sentenced to 10 years in prison for not stopping a ‘runaway train’ (AP) The first parents convicted in a U.S. mass school shooting were sentenced to at least 10 years in prison Tuesday as a Michigan judge lamented missed opportunities that could have prevented their teenage son from possessing a gun and killing four students in 2021. “These convictions are not about poor parenting,” Oakland County Judge Cheryl Matthews said. “These convictions confirm repeated acts, or lack of acts, that could have halted an oncoming runaway train.” The hearing in a crowded, tense courtroom was the climax of an extraordinary effort to make others besides the 15-year-old attacker criminally responsible for a school shooting.

Biden says Netanyahu’s approach to the war is a mistake (AP) U.S. President Joe Biden called Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s handling of the war in Gaza a mistake and called for his government to flood Gaza with aid, ramping up pressure on Israel to reach a cease-fire and widening a rift between the two staunch allies that has worsened as the war has dragged on. Biden has been an outspoken supporter of Israel’s war against Hamas since the militant group launched a deadly assault on Oct. 7. But in recent weeks his patience with Netanyahu has appeared to be waning and his administration has taken a more stern line with Israel, rattling the countries’ decades-old alliance and deepening Israel’s international isolation over the war.

Medical care and supplies are scarce as gang violence chokes Haiti’s capital (AP) Fresh gunfire erupted Tuesday in downtown Port-au-Prince, forcing aid workers to halt urgently needed care for thousands of Haitians. Weeks of gang violence have forced some 18 hospitals to stop working and caused a shortage of medical supplies as Haiti’s biggest seaport and main international airport remain closed, warned aid workers with The Alliance for International Medical Action, a Senegal-based humanitarian organization. “The situation is really challenging and affects our movement on a daily basis,” said Antoine Maillard, the organization’s medical coordinator based in Port-au-Prince. The gang violence has driven about 17,000 people in the capital from their homes. Many are crammed into abandoned schools and other buildings where they often share a single toilet.

Colombia’s powerful former president set to become first to stand trial (Washington Post) Former president Álvaro Uribe, one of the most powerful leaders in Colombian history, is set to become the country’s first president to face a criminal trial, on charges of procedural fraud and bribery. Uribe, who served as Colombia’s president from 2002 to 2010, was once a wildly popular leader and U.S. ally whose iron-fist approach was credited with helping turn the tide of the longest-running civil conflict in the hemisphere. But for more than a decade, the former president has been enmeshed in a witness-tampering scandal in the country’s judicial system.

Ireland’s Youngest Ever Leader (NYT) Simon Harris was three years into a university degree when he dropped out in 2008. A job had come up as a parliamentary assistant to an Irish senator, and Mr. Harris, an ambitious 20-year-old from a coastal town in County Wicklow, south of Dublin, saw “an opportunity to try and make a difference,” he later told Hot Press, a Dublin-based magazine. He never looked back. On Tuesday afternoon, at 37, he became the Republic of Ireland’s youngest ever head of government, the culmination of a swift political rise to a post he has long aspired to. “He’s always been hungry for this role,” said David Farrell, a professor of politics at University College Dublin, noting that although Mr. Harris was young, he was not lacking in political experience. “His career has been short, but it’s been meteoric.”

Swiss press say ‘absurd’ European climate ruling could harm democracy (Reuters) Influential newspapers in Switzerland on Wednesday criticised a climate change ruling against the Swiss government by Europe’s top human rights court, saying it risked undermining democracy. Tuesday’s ruling by the European Court of Human Rights in favour of over 2,000 Swiss women who said Switzerland had not done enough to combat climate change is expected to embolden more people to bring climate cases against governments. Describing the ruling as “activist jurisprudence” that could pave the way for “all kinds of claims”, the center-right Neue Zuercher Zeitung (NZZ) newspaper said the elderly plaintiffs were ultimately pawns of environmental lobbies that used the court to circumvent democratic debate.

Tens of thousands evacuated in Russia, Kazakhstan amid worst floods in decades (AFP) Historic floods in Russia and Kazakhstan have forced tens of thousands from their homes. Fast-melting snow and ice has caused rivers that cross the two countries' border regions to surge, leading to the evacuation of more than 100,000 people. Russia’s Emergencies Ministry declared an emergency in the Orenburg region along the border, but citizens are still desperate and “calling for Putin’s help,” local media outlets report.

Ukraine races to fix and shield its power plants after Russian onslaught (Reuters) Russia began a second major assault on Ukraine’s energy system last month, devastating at least eight power plants and several dozen substations. Kyiv says Russia used more than 150 missiles and 240 attack drones in a single week from March 22—cutting off electricity, heating and even running water to 2 million Ukrainians, according to a parliamentary estimate. The intensity of the attacks, which have also targeted solar and hydro-electric power facilities, forced Kyiv to import power and sparked fears about the resilience of an energy system that was hobbled by a Russian air campaign in the war’s first winter. Russia has said the energy system is a legitimate military target and described last month’s attacks as “revenge strikes” to punish Ukraine for attacking Russian border regions.

Russia and China Double Down on Defying U.S. (WSJ) Russia and China have pledged to deepen their growing alliance and shared opposition to what they describe as the U.S.’s attempts to dominate the world order, with Moscow again seeking to boost trade with Beijing as it looks for new ways to bypass the Western sanctions imposed for its war on Ukraine. Russia’s Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov met with Chinese leader Xi Jinping in Beijing on Tuesday after the U.S. increased the volume of warnings that China should step back from helping the Russians pursue the war against their smaller neighbor. The meeting, which followed separate talks with China’s Foreign Minister Wang Yi, also came against a backdrop of a growing tussle for influence in the global south between the West on one hand, and China and Russia and their partners on the other. Lavrov criticized what he called the West’s proclivity for falling in behind Washington, and the U.S.’s attempts to get the rest of the world to follow the same line. “There is no place for dictatorship, hegemony, neocolonial and colonial practices, which are now being applied by the United States and all the rest of the collective West unquestioningly submitting to the will of Washington,” Lavrov said.

China's Xi says nobody can stop ‘family reunion’ with Taiwan (Reuters) Chinese President Xi Jinping told former Taiwan President Ma Ying-jeou on Wednesday that outside inference could not stop the “family reunion” between the two sides of the Taiwan Strait, and that there are no issues that cannot be discussed. Since the defeated Republic of China government fled to Taiwan in 1949 after losing a civil war to Mao Zedong’s communists, no serving Taiwanese leader has visited China. Ma, president from 2008 to 2016, last year became the first former Taiwanese leader to visit China, and is now on his second trip to the country, at a time of simmering military tension across the strait. Meeting Ma in Beijing’s Great Hall of the People, where foreign leaders normally hold talks with top Chinese officials, Xi said that people on both sides of the strait are Chinese. “External interference cannot stop the historical trend of reunion of the country and family,” Xi said, in comments reported by Taiwanese media.

Ankara’s pressure campaign (Foreign Policy) Turkey restricted exports to Israel on Tuesday, saying Ankara will only lift its curbs on trade once Israel and Hamas secure a cease-fire in Gaza and “the unhindered flow of sufficient humanitarian aid” is allowed to enter the enclave. The announcement impacts 54 product categories, including iron, steel, fertilizer, and aviation fuel. Turkish Foreign Minister Hakan Fidan said the decision was made in response to Israel denying Turkey’s request late Monday to airdrop aid into Gaza. Ankara plans to maintain commercial ties with Israel. Israeli Foreign Minister Israel Katz immediately condemned Turkey’s actions, accusing President Recep Tayyip Erdogan of “once again sacrificing the economic interests of the people of Turkey for his support of Hamas.” Israel ordered its Foreign Ministry on Tuesday to prepare an “extensive list” of Turkish products to ban, and it said it would ask the United States and other allies to stop investing in Turkey and prevent imports from the country.

Israel threatens to strike Iran directly if Iran launches attack from its territory (AP) Israel’s foreign minister threatened Wednesday that its country’s forces would strike Iran directly if the Islamic Republic launched an attack from its territory against Israel, as tensions between the rival powers flare following the killings of Iranian generals in a blast at the Iranian consulate in Syria. The remarks came after Iran’s Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei reiterated early Wednesday a promise to retaliate against Israel over the attack on its consulate in Damascus earlier this month. Tehran holds Israel responsible for the strike that leveled the building, killing 12 people. Israel has not acknowledged its involvement, though it has been bracing for an Iranian response to the attack, a significant escalation in their long-running shadow war.

Glasses Improve Income, Not Just Eyesight (NYT) If you’re 50 or older and reading this article, chances are you are wearing a pair of inexpensive reading glasses to correct your presbyopia, the age-related decline in vision that makes it progressively more difficult to see fine print and tiny objects. Eventually, everyone gets the condition. But for nearly a billion people in the developing world, reading glasses are a luxury that many cannot afford. According to the World Health Organization, the lack of access to corrective eyewear inhibits learning among young students, increases the likelihood of traffic accidents and forces millions of middle-age factory workers and farmers to leave the work force too early. Uncorrected presbyopia, not surprisingly, makes it harder for breadwinners to support their families. That’s the conclusion of a new study which found that garment workers, artisans and tailors in Bangladesh who were provided with free reading glasses experienced a 33 percent increase in income compared to those who were not given glasses.

[swldx]

BBC 0525 5 Mar 2024

6195Khz 0459 5 MAR 2024 - BBC (UNITED KINGDOM) in ENGLISH from SANTA MARIA DI GALERIA. SINPO = 55333. English, ID@0459z pips and newsday preview. @0501z World News anchored by Neil Nunes. China has set an ambitious growth target of around 5% for this year, as it outlined a series of measures aimed at boosting its flagging economy. Premier Li Qiang made the announcement at the opening of the annual National People's Congress (NPC) on Tuesday. Mr Li acknowledged that China's economic performance had faced "difficulties", adding that many of these had "yet to be resolved". It comes as China struggles to reinvigorate its once-booming economy. The US Supreme Court has struck down efforts by individual states to disqualify Donald Trump from running for president using an anti-insurrection constitutional clause. The unanimous ruling is specific to Colorado, but it also overrides challenges brought in other states. Colorado had barred Mr Trump from its Republican primary, arguing he incited the 2021 Capitol riot. The court ruled that only Congress, rather than the states, has that power. US Vice-President Kamala Harris expressed "deep concern" over Gaza in talks with Israeli war cabinet member Benny Gantz, the White House says. In a statement, Ms Harris's office said she had urged Israel to let more aid into Gaza, while calling on Hamas to accept terms for a ceasefire. It said they discussed the need for a "credible" humanitarian plan before any major military operation in Rafah. The US is ramping up pressure on Israel to facilitate more aid for Gaza. Haiti's government declared a 72-hour state of emergency on Sunday after armed gangs stormed a major prison. At least 12 people were killed and about 3,700 inmates escaped in the jailbreak. Gang leaders are demanding the resignation of Prime Minister Ariel Henry, whose whereabouts are unknown since he travelled to Kenya. Gangs control around 80% of the capital, Port-au-Prince. Gang violence has plagued Haiti for years. A satellite expected to transform our view of planet-warming methane emissions from oil and gas production has launched from the Vandenburg Space Force Base in California. Called MethaneSAT, the satellite will orbit the planet 15 times per day, using infrared sensors to measure methane leaking from all of the world’s major production centres. Australia said on Tuesday it would set up a A$2 billion ($1.3 billion) finance facility to boost trade and investment in Southeast Asia as it looks to deepen ties in a region where many are also searching for ways to live with a more assertive China. The fund will focus on clean energy and infrastructure and provide loans, guarantees, equity and insurance. Australia will also tip in an extra A$140 million to extend an existing programme which advises the region on infrastructure projects. A top Vietnamese property tycoon went on trial Tuesday along with dozens of others, accused of embezzling $12.5 billion in the country's biggest ever fraud case. Roman Polanski's defamation trial in France revisits his contentious past and probes the balance between reputation rights and supporting sexual assault survivors. @0506z "Newsday" begins. MLA 30 amplified loop (powered w/8 AA rechargeable batteries ~10.8vdc), Etón e1XM. 250kW, beamAz 185°, bearing 49°. Received at Plymouth, MN, United States, 7877KM from transmitter at Santa Maria di Galeria. Local time: 2259.

[brookstonalmanac]

Events 1.6 (before 1910)

1066 – Following the death of Edward the Confessor on the previous day, the Witan meets to confirm Harold Godwinson as the new King of England; Harold is crowned the same day, sparking a succession crisis that will eventually lead to the Norman conquest of England. 1205 – Philip of Swabia undergoes a second coronation as King of the Romans. 1322 – Stephen Uroš III is crowned King of Serbia, having defeated his half-brother Stefan Konstantin in battle. His son is crowned "young king" in the same ceremony. 1355 – Charles IV of Bohemia is crowned with the Iron Crown of Lombardy as King of Italy in Milan. 1449 – Constantine XI is crowned Byzantine Emperor at Mystras. 1492 – The Catholic Monarchs Ferdinand and Isabella enter Granada at the conclusion of the Granada War. 1536 – The first European school of higher learning in the Americas, Colegio de Santa Cruz de Tlatelolco, is founded by Viceroy Antonio de Mendoza and Bishop Juan de Zumárraga in Mexico City. 1540 – King Henry VIII of England marries Anne of Cleves. 1579 – The Union of Arras unites the southern Netherlands under the Duke of Parma (Ottavio Farnese), governor in the name of King Philip II of Spain. 1641 – Arauco War: The first Parliament of Quillín is celebrated, putting a temporary hold on hostilities between Mapuches and Spanish in Chile. 1661 – English Restoration: The Fifth Monarchists unsuccessfully attempt to seize control of London, England. The revolt is suppressed after a few days. 1721 – The Committee of Inquiry on the South Sea Bubble publishes its findings, revealing details of fraud among company directors and corrupt politicians. 1724 – Sie werden aus Saba alle kommen, BWV 65, a Bach cantata, for Epiphany, is performed the first time. 1781 – In the Battle of Jersey, the British defeat the last attempt by France to invade Jersey in the Channel Islands. 1809 – Combined British, Portuguese and colonial Brazilian forces begin the Invasion of Cayenne during the Napoleonic Wars. 1838 – Alfred Vail and colleagues demonstrate a telegraph system using dots and dashes (this is the forerunner of Morse code). 1839 – The Night of the Big Wind, the most damaging storm in 300 years, sweeps across Ireland, damaging or destroying more than 20% of the houses in Dublin. 1847 – Samuel Colt obtains his first contract for the sale of revolver pistols to the United States government. 1870 – The inauguration of the Musikverein in Vienna, Austria. 1893 – The Washington National Cathedral is chartered by Congress. The charter is signed by President Benjamin Harrison. 1900 – Second Boer War: Having already besieged the fortress at Ladysmith, Boer forces attack it, but are driven back by British defenders. 1907 – Maria Montessori opens her first school and daycare center for working class children in Rome, Italy.