#ford walking dipper and stan through the first few weeks back in their home dimension and navigating that adjustment period

[fallen-gravity]

Cheap Thrills and Expensive Snacks

Mabel grins. “Grunkle Ford, do you want to go on a road trip with us? One last adventure before we have to go home?”

Ford’s smile softens with sadness. He’d gotten so caught up in reveling in Bill’s defeat that he’d almost forgotten the kids were heading back to California at the end of the summer.

Ford shakes his head. “I would love to, but…” he frowns. “I’m not sure we have enough time”

The young twins exchange grins, like that’s exactly the response they were waiting for.

“I wouldn’t say that, Grunkle Ford” Dipper grins, looking like he’s struggling to suppress a fit of giggles.

“We have all time in the world” Mabel finishes Dipper’s sentence for him, and in perfect unison the twins pull out a roll of measuring tape from their pockets.

Notes: Here's my belated entry for Week 3 of Forduary: Road Trip!! I absolutely love the road trip trope, and highkey wish Ford could've gotten to see some of Stan's competitors just for the sake of how awful they were compared to the Mystery Shack. C'mon! Give Stan some credit.I also wanted an excuse for Ford to bond more with the kids before they went home, and what better way than through a never-ending roadtrip that somewhat breaks the laws of time and space?

@forduary

AO3

Ever since Ford heard the first bird chirping the morning after Weirdmageddon’s conclusion, he’s felt like a thirty-year old weight has finally been lifted from his shoulders. For the first time in decades, Ford has found himself able to sleep, able to eat, able to do and say anything he pleases without having to speak in hushed tones or cast a cautious glance behind his shoulders.

For the first time since his childhood, he truly feels like himself again, and no longer like a marionette whose strings are always on the brink of snapping under pressure.

It was that first morning after the war, upon waking up before others (out of habit, mostly), that he allowed himself to truly sit and ponder on everything he’s been missing since shutting himself out from the world in his early twenties. He quickly came to the conclusion that the things he missed most were always the things he’d always had just outside of arm’s length; He missed the thrill of discovery, of exploration,  the passion for his life’s work that had faded into thin air the moment that fateful first test run of the portal had failed.

Most of all, he missed companionship.

As much as he hated to admit it to himself, Ford needed other people in his life more than anything else, even more than Ivy League schools and research grants and all the knowledge in the universe.

He told Stan the reason he wanted to take a boat out to the Arctic was to track and contain the remnants of Weirdmageddon that had begun to spread outside of Gravity Falls. But truth be told, he would’ve asked Stan if he still wanted to travel world with him regardless, because Ford found himself wanting nothing more than to chase their childhood dream and never let it go again.

There’s a light knock on his study door as he’s scribbling down navigation notes and he’s half-expecting to see Stan when he turns to the noise. He’s instead met with Dipper and Mabel, standing side by side in his doorway.

“Got a minute?” Dipper asks.

“We have something super important to ask you!” Mabel beams.

Ford places his pen down on his desk, and smiles. “I’m listening”

“Well,” Dipper starts. “We’ve been thinking about how we didn’t get to spend a whole lot of time with you this summer because...” he shrugs. “Well, because we didn’t know you existed until a few weeks ago”

“And that’s totally unfair to you!” Mabel throws her arms up in the air. “It’s not your fault you missed out on all the fun because you were trapped in another dimension”

Dipper nods. “And that got us thinking of all the time we spent with Grunkle Stan, and the road trip he took us on a few weeks ago without you. I don’t know if that was because he asked you and you said no, or if he left without telling you out of spite, or something”

“And that’s when a super genius idea came to us!” Mabel grins. “Grunkle Ford, do you want to go on a road trip with us? One last adventure before we have to go home?”

Ford’s smile softens with sadness. He’d gotten so caught up in reveling in Bill’s defeat that he’d almost forgotten the kids were heading back to California at the end of the summer.

But…a glance to the calendar hanging by the doorway tells him it’s August 29th, and the twins are set to leave after their birthday party ends on the 31st.

Ford shakes his head. “I would love to, but…” he frowns. “I’m not sure we have enough time”

The young twins exchange grins, like that’s exactly the response they were waiting for.

“I wouldn’t say that, Grunkle Ford” Dipper grins, looking like he’s struggling to suppress a fit of giggles.

“We have all time in the world” Mabel finishes Dipper’s sentence for him, and in perfect unison the twins pull out a roll of measuring tape from their pockets. Before Ford has even a moment to wonder what they could mean, they each pull on their tape, high five each other, and disappear into thin air.

Ford stumbles to his feet, nearly knocking his chair to the ground. Between one blink and the next the kids reappear, both of them wearing period piece costumes. The measuring tapes in their hand crackle with blue lightning.

Ford gasps. “Time tapes! Of course!” He approaches the twins in the doorway. “How did you two get ahold of these?”

“Let’s just say we have an inside to these sorts of things” Mabel replies, kicking her costume off and placing her time tape back into her sweater pocket.

“So what do you say?” Dipper steps forward. “Do you want to come with us on a road trip? We can literally go whenever we want”

“You mean when--” Mabel pauses, backtracking. “Oh, wait, you did say that”

“So what do you say, Grunkle Ford? One more adventure for the road?”

Ford’s chest fills with warmth. He’d love to; he really would, but…

“What about Stan?”

“Y’gotta give me some credit, poindexter” Stan’s voice rings from behind the corner. If Ford had to guess, it’s probably because he was waiting for his response. “Someone’s gotta tag along to babysit you three”

Ford wants to glare at his brother at the insult, but his excitement overtakes it and a grin spreads to his face instead.

“Let’s go,” he says, with all the wonder in his tone that he’d been missing for years.

Dipper and Mabel exchange nods, and take each other’s hands. With their free hands, they stretch their measuring tapes out the same length.  Stan grabs on to Mabel’s shoulder, and after he and Dipper share a silent, knowing glance, Ford places his hand on Dipper’s shoulder.

Dipper and Mabel release their tape in unison, and a large flash of white light overwhelms Ford’s vision. When it finally fades, the four of them are still standing exactly where they’d been a moment ago, the only indication that anything changed being the sparks of blue lightning crackling from their clothes.

Dipper’s the first to step away from the huddle. “See?” He gestures at Ford’s wall calendar, which now displays June instead of August. “It’s practically the beginning of the summer all over again!”

Mabel breaks away to stand beside Dipper. “Now we can go anywhere we want! We could go to Portland, or Vegas, or the lost city of Atlantis, or anywhere in the world, because this bad boy prevents us from missing our bus ride home for as long as we want!”

Stan chuckles, shaking his head. “Not so fast, Mabel. I love the enthusiasm, but I’m not sure my old RV can handle driving into the ocean. Not unless Brainiac over here is willing to do some modifications on it” Stan throws an arm around Ford’s shoulder, squeezing it tightly. “Besides, I’ve already got a plan!” Stan’s gaze shifts to Ford, and the grin on his face could split it in two. “If you think my attractions look fake, just wait ‘til you see how bad my competitors look compared to me!”

“I dunno,” Dipper frowns, scratching at his chin. “Don’t you think going back to the place where you were almost eaten by a giant spider lady is a bad idea?”

“Hey, time travel rules mean that I never met her in the first place, right?” Stan crosses his arms. “Besides, it’s not like I’m gonna fall for her tricks all over again just because she offers me discounted tickets, or something”

Dipper and Mabel exchange worried glances.

“Mmm, okay,” Dipper says. “But we’re keeping an eye on you”

“That’s the spirit!” Stan exclaims, and slaps Ford on the back as he backs out of the room. “I’m gonna go pack. I doubt you have anything to pack, Sixer, but we’re reconvening in the gift shop in an hour. Go…take a shower or something. I don’t wanna spend next twelve hours driving with someone smelling like that.”

Ford glares at him, but before he has time to respond Stan’s already gone. The kids must’ve slipped out close on Stan’s heels, because when Ford turns he’s alone in his room. Rolling his eyes, he walks to his couch and kneels on the ground, reaching underneath for his emergency exploration pack. It’s a backpack torn and worn from age, and comes already packed with water bottles, nutrient bars, sunscreen, and just about every brand of monster repellent known to mankind.

A nostalgic sort of smile threatens to tug at his lips. He hasn’t seen this bag since his early research days with Fiddleford. He slings it over his shoulders, and pats at his trench coat pocket to make sure his journal is still safely tucked inside. He doesn’t necessarily plan on making any more additions, but he supposes that old habits die hard.

~~

It’s a very bulky RV, much bigger than Ford was expecting. He’d assumed that Stan calling it an RV was just an exaggeration, and that the four of them would just be piling into the Stanleymobile as they tugged some tiny trailer along that they would only would only step foot in for sleeping. But as Ford approaches, he can see Dipper and Mabel chatting at a small table through the window, and Stan rummaging through a cupboard above them, and it looks as though there’s still plenty of room to walk between them.

Mabel taps on Dipper’s shoulder, points in Ford’s direction, and both of them wave frantically out the window at him.

“Took you long enough,” Stan suddenly appears in the doorway of the camper. “Now get in. The last thing we need is to run into the past versions of those two and get bombarded with questions” He gestures with his thumb towards Dipper. “Especially him.  He sees that journal sticking out of your pocket and we’re done for”

Ford chuckles. “I can only imagine,” he says, and climbs aboard behind Stan. He’s about to take the passenger side seat besides Stan when the kids frantically wave him over.

“Grunkle Ford, over here!” Mabel beams, and hops down from her seat across from Dipper. “Come sit with us!”

“This is a road trip about spending more time with you, after all” Dipper nods. “What good will it do for us if you’re sitting way up front with Stan?”

“Yeah! No good interrogation ever happens from across the room!” Mabel exclaims.

Ford raises an eyebrow, but smiles at the pair as he takes a seat across from them. “Interrogation?”

“Yep!” Dipper grins. “We already know all of the heroic scientist stuff about you…”

“But we want to know the fun Grunkle stuff about you!” Mabel finishes his sentence for him. “You favorite ice cream flavor, your first kiss, the most illegal thing you’ve ever gotten away with…you know, just the basics!”

Ford blushes. “Well, I don’t know about that…”

“Aww, I’m sure it’s not that bad! Dipper’s first kiss was with a merman he had to give reverse CPR to!”

“Mabel!”  Dipper squeaks, his whole a dark shade of red. “That’s not fair! You know I didn’t have a choice!”

Ford can’t help the fond smile that spreads to his face. It’s moments like these that he’s going to miss the most. Sure, he’ll have anomalies, and treasure, and the whole world to explore, but he just knows that none of that is ever going to compare to time alone with the kids.

Once Stan gets the RV up and running, Ford knows there’s no going back. He and the kids swap childhood stories for hours, only pausing when Stan pulls off the side of the road to fuel up on gas and snacks. Dipper tells him of the time him and Mabel shaved their heads after a bully stuck gum in Mabel’s hair on photo day, and Ford tells them of the time that he and Stan swapped clothes on photo day just to see if they could get away with it. (They could, and Ford still has the yearbook where their photos are mislabeled as each other hidden away in his study to this day).

It’s eye opening, honestly. The young twins really are a mirror image to himself and Stan when they were kids.

“We’re here!” Stan grins, screeching the RV to a sudden halt. Upon looking out the window, the only thing Ford can see is a gift shop about the size of an outhouse and a ball of yarn about three sizes bigger than the RV.  Stan stands from the driver’s seat, stretching. “You think I overcharge for my tours, Sixer? This woman charges double the price of my admission just to take a picture of this fuzz ball” He reaches underneath the driver’s seat, pulling out a large hook attached to a thick rope. “We’re only doing her a favor by stealing it! Starting from scratch with a new attraction could do her some good”

“Hmm, I dunno” Dipper shrugs. “Don’t you think that doing the exact same prank on all of your competitors in the exact same order is just gonna result in them, I dunno, pranking you again in the exact same way?”

“Nonsense!” Stan brings his hand to his chest like Dipper had offended him. “The only reason they got away with it last time is because we left poindexter here home alone in the basement. There’ll be dozens of tour groups coming through the shack today with my past self taking care of the place for me.”  He taps at his forehead. “Besides, wasn’t this whole road trip your idea in the first place?” He smirks. “Are you telling me that your own idea is dumb?”

Dipper opens his mouth to argue back, realizes he has nothing, and pouts grumpily as he hops out of the RV. Stan cackles, and hops out of the RV after him. Ford rolls his eyes, and hops out after them to take a look at his surroundings. Stan really wasn’t kidding; everything really is contained to the one parking lot with nothing to show for it but the giant ball of yarn and a converted outhouse with tie-dye tee shirts hanging from its roof.

“Don’t just stand there gawking at it!” Stan slaps him on the shoulder, grinning. “Either help the kids out or talk the old woman’s ear off long enough to distract her” he gestures with a thumb towards Dipper and Mabel, giggling and poking at each other as they tie the rope end of the hook to the RV. As Mabel walks to attach the hook to the large yarn ball, she notices Ford watching her and waves hello.

“Hey Grunkle Ford!” she shouts. “If there’s enough left over from this mound after we drag it home, I’ll knit you a sweater with it!”

Ford laughs as he approaches to help her. “I’m counting on it.”

As it turns out, she wasn’t joking. As soon as they’ve all piled back into the RV to head to the next tourist trapped, Mabel already has her sewing needles in hand and a tangled ball of multicolored yarn sitting on the table in front of her. It’s amazing watching her work, clicking the needles together so quickly yet delicately, not missing a single fold. Ford’s never seen someone pour so much love into something so particular since the early days of his research.

Ford doesn’t want to interrupt her focus, so he turns to Dipper instead.

“How long has she been able to do that?”

Dipper glances at his sister beside him. “Oh, you mean sewing? Our grandma from our mom’s side of the family taught her when she was about six.” He rolls his eyes. “Our parents tried to buy her an electronic sewing machine for our eighth birthday, but she flat out rejected it because she insisted there wouldn’t be enough love in her creations if she didn’t make them by hand”

“It’s true!” Mabel exclaims, not looking up from her sewing job. “I’m not gonna sit around and let some machine do all the work for me! How are my friends and family supposed to know I made them their sweaters with love if I didn’t sew my blood and sweat into the threads myself?”

Ford hopes she’s being metaphorical, but the sentiment is still there. “So you’re telling me that every sweater you’ve worn this summer is homemade?”

“Yep!” she beams. “All the way down to the embroidery.” She holds up the skeleton of the sweater she’s working on into the light. “You’re real lucky, Grunkle Ford. This’ll be my first sweater I’ve ever made out of stolen materials!”

Her use of the term first rather than only makes Ford laugh.  The more time he spends with them, the less he wants to say goodbye to them. Stan must be the bravest man alive, being willing to send these kids home after three months with them, because if it were up to him he’d already be signing adoption papers to make them legally his.

“Stop two!” Stan yells from the front of the RV, and hops out as soon as they’re parked. Mabel places her work gently on the table, and follows Stan out without any effort. Dipper, on the other hand, takes one look out the window at where they’ve stopped and pales.

“Oh no”

Ford follows his gaze. It’s just a single story home turned on its head, absolutely nothing about it giving Ford the impression that there’s anything scary about it.

“What’s wrong?” Ford asks. “Do you get motion sickness? I learned quite a few tricks on how to deal with just the thing in the Spinning Top Dimension! You’re going to need a few things first, but I’m sure we’ll be able to find them around here somewhere-”

“N-no, it’s not that” Dipper cuts him off, face turning a dark shade of red. “The last time we were here I tried asking Grunkle Stan if he had any advice on how to talk to girls. And there was this one really cute girl, and we hit it off, but…” he rubs at his arm. “I acted like a total jerk. I treated her like she was just a number and I feel awful about it”

Ford frowns, getting down on one knee. “You’re not worried you’re going to run into her again, are you? This time loop should be stable enough to prevent her from showing up early”

Dipper’s gaze falls to the floor. “No, it’s more like…I’m so afraid of being myself that I feel like the only way I can fit in is to act like something I’m not. I just wish I could figure out a way to talk to girls without forcing myself to act like I’m better than them or something”

Ford smiles. “Dipper, I may not have any sound advice when it comes to girls,  but I’ve only known you for a number of weeks, and I think anyone would be lucky to have you. You’re kind and caring and so brilliant for your age” Dipper opens his mouth to protest, but Ford shakes his head. “Some of the most brilliant minds in the world suffered from anxiety and depression, my boy, and look where they are now. I have the upmost confidence that the same thing is bound to happen to you”.

Dipper’s eyes are big and wide, like he’s about to cry, but the waterworks never come. Dipper throws his arms around Ford’s neck in a hug, and Ford hugs him back. Once they pull away, they hop out of the van to join Stan and Mabel outside to prevent Stan from coming back in to yell at them. This stop is a bit less complicated, just a simple walkthrough to make sure there isn’t a hoard of tourists inside before running back out to tip the whole house right side up. It’s a lot of laughing from Stan and sprinting back to the van, and once they’re out of the parking lot and back on the highway it’s as if they never stopped at all. Mabel gets right back to working on her sweater, and Dipper gets right back to chatting up Ford for life stories.

A good portion of their stops go equally as smooth. The kids convince Ford to go on the log flume at Log Land with them which he absolutely does not throw up on, thank you very much, and Mabel nearly gets lost in a corn maze, but otherwise there’s nothing much of interest. Ford’s starting to suspect that Stan must be right, that the Mystery Shack really is the most interesting tourist trap in the entire state, until a giant mountain looms over the horizon.

“There she is,” Stan says, as if he could read his brother’s thoughts. “Her first year of opening I lost over half my usual revenue and I’ve sworn revenge on her ever since” He balls his hand into a fist and smacks the top of the steering wheel. “Our biggest mistake last time was getting too attached. I say this time we run in, grab as many mummies as we can get our hands on, and book it back to the shack before Darlene notices.”

“Don’t you mean that was your biggest mistake?” Dipper quips. “Besides, didn’t we find out last time that those mummies are real dead bodies?” He shivers. “I’m not sure how comfortable I’d feel about stealing them”

From the rearview mirror, Stan raises an eyebrow at Dipper. “What, you afraid their souls are gonna follow us home and haunt us? Work on your moral compass later, kid, this is about revenge” He adjusts the mirror. “Besides! What’s the chance we rescue someone who isn’t dead yet, just slowly suffocating in that nasty tasting web?”

Dipper opens his mouth to say one thing, pauses, and starts again. “Grunkle Stan, are you telling me you tried to eat the web you were trapped in?”

Stan shrugs. “Hey, I’m no stranger to chewing my way out of things. I’m just lucky I didn’t break any teeth on it, like I did with that car trunk”

As if that doesn’t raise more questions than it does answers, Stan drops the conversation entirely and doesn’t say another word until the RV pulls into the parking lot. Ford can’t even see the mountain peak when he hops out, it’s so obscured by fog that he knows wasn’t there ten minutes ago. Fog is the number one trap produced by anomalies to hunt their pray, so it’s no wonder this place gives Stan the creeps. Ford can’t even begin to imagine the size of the spider monsters the others described to him.

A shriek nearly escapes him at the feeling of something spindly crawling up his arm, but when he whips around he sees it’s just Stan running his fingers along his shoulder in a quick, scattered pattern. When he catches Ford’s eyes, he laughs so hard that tears pour down his cheeks.

“You should’ve seen the look on your face!” Stan wheezes. “You were all oh no, mister spider half the size of my hand, don’t eat me!” he cackles, wiping at his eyes with his wrist. “C’mon, time is money, and we don’t have any to waste” he gestures to the kids, already waiting at the information booth. “If we don’t hurry the kids are gonna get on the sky tram without us”

Ford raises an eyebrow. “You? On a sky tram?”

“Dipper didn’t tell you?” Stan’s raised eyebrow matches Ford’s. “Mabel helped me conquer my fear of heights! Now I’m untouchable!”

Seventeen years of the boardwalk and all the cotton candy as bribe in the world couldn’t fix Stan’s fear of heights. Dipper and Mabel really do continue to amaze him the more Stan tells him about them.

“Right,” Ford shakes his head, smiling fondly. “Of course.”

~~

It’s really no wonder this place boasts having the world’s slowest sky tram, because if it weren’t for the moving tree line Ford would almost think they weren’t moving at all. The bored expression on everyone else’s faces, a massive shift from the mischievous grins they’d been wearing before they got on has Ford choking down laughter. It’s about five minutes before there’s any sight of anything but tree bark, and the sun beaming directly into the glass car makes the whole thing feel like a sauna.

Still, it’s a dramatic shift in pace, and not one that Ford rejects. It’s really forcing him to slow down and think about his own feelings for once, a privilege he hasn’t had since he was in high school. Maybe it’s a little selfish of him to cherish the times he just gets to lose himself in his own head, rather than to spend so much of his time calculating plans to rescue others from danger, but-

“Whaddya think, poindexter?” Stan’s voice suddenly breaks through Ford’s thoughts, startling him.

Ford blushes. “What do I think of what?”

“The new plan!” Stan gestures to Dipper with his thumb. “Since this buzzkill is so against stealing ‘real dead bodies’,” he emphasizes with air quotes, “and since we probably couldn’t shove them all in this car anyway, we’re gonna go ahead with Plan B instead; Burning down Widow’s Peak!” Stan throws his hands in the air dramatically.

Dipper beams. “That way, they can’t make any more mummies for their mummy museum, and we might be able to save a few people from suffocating to death!” Stan and Dipper high five.

“It’s a brilliant plan, but…” Ford taps at his chin. “Where do you suppose we’re going to find the fire to burn it down?”

Stan cocks an eyebrow at him. “You tell me, mister ‘setting my face on fire is faster than shaving’. I wouldn’t be surprised if you had a lighter in your pocket right now. They have a bunch of prop torches in the caves, but if we pop the lightbulbs out of them and light them they should work good as usual” Stan’s mischievous grin is back on his face, a perfect reflection of when he was thirteen and pickpocketing a dollar from people’s wallets on the boardwalk to buy a box of saltwater taffy.

Turns out, it’s just as contagious now as it was back then. Ford reaches into the front pocket of his trench coat, and sure enough, comes up with a lighter. Stan erupts in laughter at the sight of it, and soon enough the entire car is infected with it. The rest of the ride up the mountain is much bubblier after that, with everyone swapping overdramatic stories of how the plan is going to go.

~~

Widow’s Peak is much bigger than Ford was expecting. It’s a whole cave that looks like it stretches for miles, and there really are rotting skeletons hanging upside down from the cave walls and ceilings.

Ford shudders.

“Aww, c’mon, Sixer! I know for a fact this isn’t half as bad as the stuff in your journals” Stan jabs at his shoulder with his unlit torch. “Besides, didn’t you say in your own journal that most ghosts come from their old bodies not having a proper burial? He gestures at a skeleton hanging upside down from the ceiling, its left hand barely hanging on by a thread. “You think any of these guys look like their spirits were able to move on peacefully, or however it goes?” Stan shakes his head matter of-factly. “You really want some poor unsuspecting tourist to bump into a hoard of angry ghosts? Tsk tsk”

“Alright, alright” Ford raises his hands in self-defense. “I suppose you’re right”. He takes his lighter out of his pocket and tosses it to Stan. Stan lights up his own torch, helps Dipper and Mabel with theirs, and then he turns back to help light Ford’s.

“Alright,” Stan rubs his hands together the best he can with a lit torch tucked under his arms. “Everyone knows the plan. Burn as many mummies as you can find, rescue the poor suckers who are still alive, and signal if you hear Darlene coming. Since I don’t trust Sixer over here not to try and interview her and get himself in trouble again, I say I’m in charge of lookout duty.” He adjusts his collar and flattens down the wrinkles of his suits with a quick pat down. “I flirt with her just long enough to distract her, I throw my torch in her face, and then we book it out of here as fast as our legs can carry us”

Dipper still doesn’t look convinced. “I don’t know, isn’t that exactly how you got yourself tangled up in a web last time?”

“Oh please,” Stan scoffs, waving a dismissive hand. “The only reason that worked last time is ‘cause she cornered me when we were alone. Besides, where’s she gonna take me if she catches me that you can’t just throw a torch and rescue me five minutes after it happens?”

Dipper’s face darkens. “True,” he mumbles under his breath, which makes Stan laugh. Stan slaps him on the shoulder, and Dipper glares at him, but there doesn’t seem to be any malice in it.

It’s one final glance between the four of them, and they’re all running off in different directions of the cave. It’s not long before the stench of burning silk fills the air, mixed with the stench of something Ford doesn’t want to think too much about. The webs burn relatively quickly, and together they burn through half of the cave in a much faster time than Ford would’ve expected. He’s about to light up one that looks like it was left here fairly recently, until something inside it starts wiggling.  Startled, Ford steps backwards until his back hits the cave wall, a soft oof escaping him.

“S’matter, poindexter?” Stan looks up from the fire he’s stomping out with his foot. “You see a widdle baby spider that freaked you out?”

Ford tries to glare at him, but the fear stabbing him in the chest doesn’t let it stick. He swallows hard, and points towards the wiggling cocoon with his torch.

“I think we have a live one” he whispers, stepping to stand beside Stan. Once Stan follows Ford’s torch with his eyes, something inside him tenses up.

“Ah, wh-what’d I tell you?” Stan’s voice shakes. “It’s probably just some poor sucker who fell for Darlene’s charms. Definitely not a gross sack of baby spider people or anything”

“R-right,” Ford swallows hard, and inches back towards the cocoon, rapidly waving his torch back and forth to potentially scare off whatever could be inside trying to break out.  But the longer he waves the torch in front of the web, the more he can make out the silhouette of a regular human being.

Throwing all caution to the wind, Ford rushes forward and begins tearing at the web with his bare hands, just enough so that the man is free from the chest up. He takes large gasps of air, and upon realizing that his hands are free he begins tearing at the web himself.  Once his feet are free and hit the ground, he takes one look at the Pines family, mumbles a startled thank you, and runs for his life out of the cave.

After that, the rest of the burnings go pretty smoothly. There’s significantly less living tourists in the cave than Ford would’ve expected from such a large tourist trap, and Ford’s not entirely sure whether he should find that reassuring or downright terrifying.  He’s almost surprised everything went so well, until the four of them nearly collide with a woman on their way out of the cave.

She looks just as baffled to see them as Ford feels to see her.

“Can I…help you?” She asks in a thick Jersey-esque accent. The name tag pinned to her shirt reads DARLENE in large brick letters.

“No!” Dipper cuts in before neither Ford nor Stan can respond to her. He clears his throat. “I mean, uh, no. Uh, apologies if this is a restricted area, but we got lost trying to find our way back to the sky tram” he shrugs overdramatically, no doubt in attempt to show Darlene that his hands are empty. She squints at him, and for a moment Ford could swear he just saw her blink horizontally. The silence that follows, though it probably doesn’t last for more than a few seconds, feels like it drags on for ages.

Suddenly, she’s donning an overly sweet smile. “Well, why didn’t you just say so? Let me walk you back. We’ve gotten more than our fair share of tourists who’ve gone missing from wandering too far into our caves, and I’d hate to have that happen to such a nice looking family like yours” She grins, flashing her unusually sharp teeth.  The four of them stay quiet until they’re all packed into their tram car, and Darlene is waving sweetly at them from behind.

They each collectively sigh. “Woof, that was a close one” Stan says, wiping the sweat from his forehead with his wrist. In a sudden shift of mood, he reaches over next to him and pulls Dipper into a headlock. “How’s about it for this guy’s quick thinking, huh?” he grins, and the four of them laugh until they hear a horrifying screech that makes their tram car rumble. They turn, and see Darlene emerging from the cave, the bottom half of her body replaced by that of a giant spider.

“My food!” she screams, shaking her first at the tram cars. “You burned all my food! Mark my words, I may not have gotten your names but I don’t forget faces very easily, you hear? If you ever show your face here again you’re dead meat!” She screams, yanking on her hair to reveal the rest of her spider-like body under her human disguise.

Stan simply cackles. “Yeah, we’ll see about that!” he mocks, knowing well enough that she can’t hear them from inside the car. He turns his attention back to the rest of the family. “Maybe we should go and warn our past selves to bring bug spray!” He exclaims, laughing himself to near tears.

Ford only rolls his eyes, but can’t help the smile on his face.

If only he’d known what he’d be missing when he turned down Stan’s offer to take this road trip with him and the kids the first time around.

The tram ride back to the parking lot is even more relaxing than the ride up. The sun is setting this time around, and even if the wind can’t really reach inside the car the whole thing just feels cooler. Most of all, he finds that the sound of the Stan and the kids’ laughter is far more welcome than any old conversation he could have in his own head.

When everyone piles back into the RV, they do not drive away immediately like they had at all the other stops. Instead, Stan turns around to face the three of them. “Well, that’s the end of that. That’s all I had planned, and we still have…” he pauses to count on his finger. “Two more months ‘til the kids have to go back home, technically. I’m all out of ideas, and I’m sure the kids have seen enough of the Gravity Falls weirdness for one summer”

He smiles to the kids, who nod and in turn smile at Ford.

“So where do you want to go now, Grunkle Ford?” Mabel says, with stars shining in her eyes. The grin spreading on Dipper’s face matches hers like two peas in a pod.

“Any place in the world. Wherever you want to go…” He pulls the time tape out of his pocket. “…For however long you want”

[orangeoctopi7]

Stupid Teen Emotions

@forduary Week three is travel/trapped. In this story, Stan and Ford TRAVEL back to the past, where they become TRAPPED! It fits!

Chapter 1:  Back in My Day

They didn’t sleep well, that first night. Ford stayed up late, because of course he would have stayed up into the wee hours of the night working on his perpetual motion machine in the original timeline. But he barely touched the project. With the knowledge he had now, he could probably build the whole thing tonight, but that would, of course, be changing the timeline. A younger Ford had learned a lot, working so hard and so long on this machine, and future Ford didn’t want to deprive his past self of that important lesson. So instead, he began writing, racking his brain for anything he could remember of January, 1969.

Stan tried to sleep at first, but he just couldn't. He was too anxious and excited, all rolled into one. So he instead dug out a few of his old comic books that never got thrown away.

They both must have fallen asleep at some point, because come morning, there was a rapping at the door that woke them both with a start.

“Get up, you two! You’re gonna be late for school!” A woman with a thick Jersey accent yelled through the door.

“M-mom?” Ford’s head lifted blearily off his desk.

“Wow, you are really taking the whole ‘stick to the timeline’ thing seriously.” Stan mused from his bottom bunk.

“I didn’t mean to fall asleep at my desk…” Ford groaned.

“You never do, Sixer, you never do.”

They marched downstairs and into the kitchen, where their mother had a breakfast of hot cinnamon and apple oatmeal waiting for them. Stan was so happy to see her, he ran over and hugged her, pecking a swift kiss on her cheek.

"Aww, sweetie!" She planted a kiss on his forehead. "I'm still not paying your parking ticket." She added flatly.

"What parking ticket?" Stan asked, confused. "Oh, um, I mean, drat."

Ford was too tired to even work up the energy to be happy to see his mother. As he sat down, he automatically reached for the coffee pot. But a rolled up newspaper smacked his hand away.

“What d’you think you’re doin’?” Caryn asked, eyebrow raised.

“... getting my morning coffee?” Ford answered, addled.

“How many times do I have to tell you, honey? No coffee ‘til you’re 18. It’ll stunt your growth!”

Ford looked like he was about to have a fit.

“Wait, are we not 18?” Stan asked quickly. Luckily, his parents ignored his out-of-place comment.

“Ya don’t need coffee, ya need more sleep!” Filbrick grunted from behind his newspaper.

“You both drink ten cups a day!” Ford argued, his voice cracking again.

“That’s cuz we’re adults.” Filbrick growled, “Once you’re old an’ decrepit, you can drink all the coffee ya want.”

“Trust me, he will.” Stan said flatly.

Ford kicked him under the table. Hard. Stan cried out.

“Can it, you two!” Caryn scolded them, “You’ll wake up Shermie. I don’t wanna have to deal with three crying babies.”

The brothers finished their breakfast sullenly but quietly, and grabbed their backpacks before heading out the door.

“Think we should leave Shermie a note warning him to watch out for time travelers?” Stan asked as he fished out his keys to the STNLYMBL. “Y’know, for when he’s older?”

“Then Dipper and Mabel will be born later than 2000.” Ford reminded him irritably.

“Right.” Stan smacked himself. “Man, this sucks! Why time travel if we can’t make things better?”

Ford’s only reply was a surly sigh as he turned to the cafe next door.

“Hey, where’re you goin’?” Stan asked.

“To get some coffee!”

“Seriously, Sixer? Hot Belgian Waffles is next door, Mrs. DuBios will rat you out to Ma for sure!”

Ford heaved an even more enraged sigh that bordered on a growl, and turned on his heal to get into Stan’s car, slamming the door shut.

“Whoa, easy, we’ll just stop by the donut place on the boardwalk.” Stan reassured him as he started the car. “What’s gotten into you?”

The scientist groaned and pulled his fingers through his curly brown hair. “I don’t know! Normally it’s simple to just focus on my intellect and control my emotions, but it just isn’t working now for some reason!”

“‘Control’ your emotions, or bottle them up?” Stan muttered. Ford shot him a withering glare. “Shoot, I wasn’t supposed to say that out loud. Why do I keep doin’ that?”

“And the only reason I’m so mad in the first place is because I’m so tired!” Ford continued to rant, “I got at least four hours of sleep last night, it doesn’t make any sense!”

“Heh, guess teen Ford isn’t used to old man Ford’s space-sleep schedule. Or lack of sleep schedule, anyway.”

Ford’s face brightened into his ‘a-ha!’ expression. “Stanley, that’s it!”

“What?” 

“The reason I’m having such a hard time regulating my emotions, and the reason you can’t keep your mouth shut even more than usual! We may still have our minds from 2013, but our bodies are teenagers in the middle of puberty. Our hormone levels are magnitudes higher than what we’ve become accustomed to.”

“Great. Goin’ through puberty again. Just what everyone wants outta time travel.”

They pulled up to the donut shop on the boardwalk. Stan poked around in his seat and found a quarter, which he handed to Ford. Suddenly, his brother looked unsure.

“Stan, maybe you should hang onto this. You’re going to need all the money you can get, come summer.”

“It’s a freaking quarter, Poindexter.”

“Yeah, but a quarter is worth a lot more in 1969 than it will be in 2013! This is almost a whole gallon of gas!”

Stan pinched the bridge of his nose. “Ten minutes ago you were about to have a meltdown because you couldn't get your morning coffee, just buy it, Ford!”

“Fine, but I’ll pay for it myself.”

“With what money, genius? You didn’t have a job in high school because you were too busy with your academic science nerd stuff! Now go buy yourself a cup of coffee, or I’ll make you walk the rest of the way to school.”

Ford frowned, but took the quarter. He couldn’t help but feel guilty as he got his cup of coffee. How could he or anyone else have ever said that Stan was the lazy one, when Stan was the only one who’d ever had a ‘real’ job? Even to this day, Ford had never had what anyone would call a normal job, barring that one summer he’d been a lifeguard at a waterpark in a dolphin-dominant dimension. He’d always relied on scholarships and grants and accademia, which was hard work, in its own way, but still.  It certainly wasn’t what his father would have called a real job. While traveling across dimensions, he’d relied on trading information and knowledge, building and selling inventions, and even, occasionally, stealing.

Stan was the one who’d gotten a minimum wage, part-time job selling popsicles on the beach. Stan was the one who’d entered local semi-pro boxing matches and brought home winnings. Stan was the one who’d saved up for his own car. 

“Ar-are you crying!?” Stan exclaimed when Ford climbed back into the car, cup of coffee in hand.  Ford reached up to wipe his eyes, surprised as his brother to find tears there.

“Oh geez, Stanford, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so harsh, I just--” Stan began to babble.

“N-no, it’s not you.” Ford found his voice wavering as soon as he tried to speak. “It’s just-- gah, I’m so stupid! Stupid hormonal chemical imbalance!”

Ford tried to keep himself from crying anymore by taking a big gulp of coffee. It wasn’t very good, and it was just this side of warm, but it instantly improved his mood.

“Ah, there’s that good dopamine.”

“Better?”

“Much. Let’s go. I think we’re already late.”

Despite the fact that they were ten minutes late, there were still several students milling about when they arrived at the school. The twins felt like they should stick out like a sore thumb, but nobody paid them any mind. 

“Ugh, never thought I’d come back here.” Stan grumbled.

“Well, look on the bright side!” Ford reassured him, “Now that you’ve studied quantum physics and run your own business for thirty years, Math and Science classes should be a breeze!”

“Hey, yeah! I can’t wait to see the look on Mr. Grauberger’s face when I can tell him exactly how much interest $300 will accumulate over 20 years!” But he paused. “Wait, what about changin’ the timeline? Pretty sure I never answered questions in class.”

“Oh, it wouldn’t make that much of a difference.” Ford scoffed. “Even if you get 100% on every quiz while we’re here, I don’t think it’d be enough to bring your grade up past a C, and you’ll be dropping out before graduation anyway.”

“Oh yeah….” Stan’s good mood quickly washed away.

Ford rested a comforting hand on his shoulder. “We know it all works out in the end.”

“Yeah…” Stan agreed, “but there was still a lot of heartache gettin’ there.”

[rmjagonshi]

Why I haven’t updated Whole Again Yet

These are ideas that I have been typing up instead of writing like I should. So, At least I should share. 

-Stan hits on Ford while he doesn’t know who Ford is-

-Dipper accidentally/awkwardly flirts with Ford, and after a few times, Ford notices and the resulting awkward conversation. Ford telling Dipper that he’s way too old, that he’s an adult, that Dipper is a kid and will live way longer than Ford, that Ford is messed up and not stable, that their family, etc. Similar to Wendy, they part amicably, friendly, and Dipper gets a big hug, they cuddle for a while before he sends Dipper to bed

-Dipper confronts Stan about being with Ford; corrupting him with his gross perverted desires. Dipper thinks he’s manipulating Ford, when it was Ford who wanted Stan, who had to convince Stan to be ok with this. Ford walks in on Dipper confronting Stan and stops the tirade. (After the + ending of Dipper’s confession?) You don’t need to defend my honor, I want this. Stan didn’t force me into anything.-

-Fiddleford gets upset over the portal and leaves. Ford gets desperate and sends Stan a postcard. Stan comes as he’s asked but runs into Fiddleford when asking for directions, since Gopher Road is way outside of town. Fiddleford recognizes Stan (even though Ford never told Fiddleford about Stan) and they got to the house. Fiddleford follows Stan in and they all argue, Fidds and Ford go back and forth and Stan is left to try and piece together what’s going on until they all hear whispering. Ford flips, but when Fidds and Stan ask him what it is, he breaks down and explains. They read his notes on Bill, listen to his stories and Ford tells them about his deal. Ford asks Stan to take his journal and go, but Fidds disagrees. He agrees with Stan to burn it instead. Fidds wants them to burn all the journals and for Ford to publish his less demonic findings. Ford is panicking about losing his research and starts to lose control to Bill. Fidds and Stan talk to Bill, noticing his eye color, and restrain Ford. Bill taunts Stan and Fidds (for different reasons) and Stan gets angry enough to kick Bill out of Ford via Ford’s sensitive body (i.e. tickles or something(Ford pops a boner?)) They get unicorn hair though trickery (Fidds kid) and seal the house. Years later, Fidds is happily married and inventing and Stan and Ford catalog the paranormal in Gravity Falls. Ford the scientist and Stan the museum curator with exhibits and such.  

-Dipper and Mabel accidentally break the time tape and end up in “1960-something” Glass Shard Beach and meet up with Stan and Ford. All same age. They have some adventures and try to fix the tape by ‘borrowing’ a screwdriver from Pines Pawns and they get chased by the time police. Ford fixes it and they all get sent back to present day Gravity Falls. The carnival has closed, Soos won Waddles for Mabel since she likes pigs. Stan, Soos and Wendy spend the evening looking for Dipper and Mabel and they find all four kids. Stan recognizes Ford (at first the kids think it’s Filbrick), and doesn’t know what to say or do. Even though they get caught with the tape and it gets confiscated and they have to go back to Glass Shard, Stan takes a moment to tell his past self to leave the Perpetual Motion machine alone. The time people leave and nothing changes. Except Stan remembers how Filbrick kicked him out a month after Ford left for West Coast and Ford chose to study anomalies anyway. Fiddleford was hired on as an assistant, but didn’t lose his mind (just left the project and moved his family to Gravity Falls). Ford is still lost in the multiverse. But now everyone knows that Ford exists and Stan lets everyone see the portal. Dipper shows him the Journal and they speculate that Gideon may have the second. During one of his shows, they use the shrinking light to break in and take it. No one can pin it on them because Stan is actually a really good crook. They all work together to open the portal. They convince Fidds to help, since he’s not living in the dump anymore, and they get Ford back a month and a half early.

-Stan gets kidnapped by the hand witch (molested by hands) and Soos, Dipper, Mabel and Wendy have to rescue him. Hurt comfort/whump with Stan being found by his family like that.

-Bill using Gold Ford as a toy. Rescuing Gold Ford from the fearamid and not being able to change him back without and act of true love (i.e. Stan doing something (platonic this time))

-Couple Stan Bros (WA) falling through to canon before weirdmageddon but after Ford comes back. Both Fords realize the dangers, but WAStan just marches in the shack and grabs a beer. WAFord bitching about dangers and collapse of dimensions and CFord freaking out. WAStan pokes CStan in the cheek and nothing happens. “We’re different people. Don’t know about you two though.” The explain that Stan is Bill. CFord freaks the fuck out and asks why the hell WAFord is ok with that. They admit that they are together. CFord realizes what’s going on and is all like…oh. Dipper and Mabel have lots of questions and they end up sticking around for a few days to figure out how to get home. CStan kisses CFord once to see why. Neither feel anything, disgust or lust, and just kinda shrug. They do end up being more affectionate though.

-Stan gets hit with a very lucid dream on the SOW about Ford. He gets freaked out about it and Ford picks up on it. Ford reminds Stan about their promise to not keep secrets. Stan admits that he is freaked out about a dream but won’t say what the dream was. Ford wont let it go and they argue it keeps escalating and escalating until Ford says something like Stan is willing to throw away everything just for some stupid dream that didn’t even matter. Stan blows up at says that that is the reason he wont say anything, because he doesn’t want to lose Ford. How on Earth would a dream make you lose me? Stan blows up and tells him. Immediately regretting it and trying to run away, except he can’t because the ship is too small. Ford tells him it’s natural. They’ve been alone for almost a year with hardly anyone else. It’s natural to feel drawn to whomever you are closest to. Stan is still not okay with it and keeps his distance, but still has dreams. Ford starts flirting casually, lingering touches and the like and Stan’s dreams get worse. Stan picks up on it and gets angry. They start fighting again and Ford snaps and let’s slip he’s been feeling pent up too. They part without speaking again. Stan approaches Ford later at tells him that he used to be a prostitute. His previous rate was $X but he’s willing to lower the price. Ford stammers, and Stan says he’s willing to give Ford a family discount. They laugh. Some months later, Stan has a jar on the dresser filled to the brim with pennies. Every time Ford comes to him, he pays a penny. As long as money changes hands, it is a service. They can live with that.  

-On the SOW, Ford admits he’s never been with anyone. Kiss, sex, nothing. He isn’t sure if he would enjoy it or not, but he’s definitely agitated he hasn’t had the opportunity. They talk awhile and discuss Stan setting him up with someone at Port. It falls apart because Ford can’t get interested, not trust strangers with something so intimate. Stan asks what would help him, and Ford tells him someone he knows/trusts. Fiddleford? No. No one else really, except Stan. Stan offers, embarrassed, and Ford tells him he has to think about it. They come together a few days later and Stan gives it all he’s got. Ford does enjoy himself. Immensely. Stan’s not comfortable with how much he enjoyed it. Ford asks a few days later if the can do it again. Stan asks why, and Ford claims he wants to try something different, he isn’t sure if it’s a continuous thing. They go again, different positions this time, and Ford really enjoys it. Again, Stan isn’t comfortable with how much they both enjoyed it. It becomes a running gag, Ford asks if Stan would like to try something, and Stan agrees, but hints that maybe Ford needs to find someone else he trusts. Ford keeps saying in time. It becomes a regular thing, Ford feeling like he had to come up with new things to try to get Stan interested. Stan tells him, finally, that Ford doesn’t have to keep doing that if he doesn’t want to (bordering on really out there kinks). They go back to regular sex and Ford admits that He doesn’t want to lose Stan, but he’s not sure if he can ever be with anyone else. They agree that at their age, it doesn’t matter what they do, so long as it’s consensual. They proceed to fuck all the time, and if they can’t, they just touch because they can.

-The next summer, the gnomes get desperate for a queen and decide it doesn’t have to be a woman, so they try to kidnap a few people: Dipper, (who has Mabel to help), Soos, to says he has to ask Melody first and his grandma so they give up, they try to steal the goat/waddles, but get attacked by the other. Finally, they decided to drug and kidnap Stan, who let his hair grow out in the past year. Stan wakes up standing at the alter with Jeff. He doesn’t react a t first because WTF is going on? And Ford and co have been looking for him because there was a struggle/mess and evidence he was in the forest. They crash the wedding and Stan doesn’t say anything, doesn’t really do anything etc. As they get ready to leave, Ford ask if Stan is ok, Stan says sure. If they were going to marry him, then they would have to give him an allowance, they can’t expect him to work, he’d still get to visit his kids (Dipper and Mabel), he’d have to be taken out once a week to a fancy restaurant, he’d ask for fancy gifts etc, and just be really high maintenance. Besides, his ex’s were all crazy (i.e. Marylin and Goldie). Dipper and Mabel stay behind and ask Jeff if he’s ok. Jeff says he might have dodged a bullet there. Mabel says that he should just put out an ad for someone. Some girl from town answers the ad and does a much better job of running the forest. Also she refuses to become a gnome because she is big enough to beat-up a fox.

-Soulmate AU with soulmate marks. Stan gets kicked out before his appears (i.e. appears in mid-twenties) and when it does, he cries because it’s a six-fingered hand. But soulmates don’t mean sex although it can. After weirdmageddon/during the clothes swap, Ford sees it and doesn’t know how to take it. Ford’s mark was always the triangle, so he’s not sure how to take it, as soulmates usually have eachother’s marks. Maybe it’s another person? Over the next year, Ford’s mark becomes inverted; instead of a triangle with a hole, it becomes a mouth eating a coin. When he realizes it, they both laugh and cry. They decide that if they want to move it forwards, then they will do so in their own time. Ends without a kiss but with definite affection (waking up in bed together (not sex) and realizing the other is actually there).        

-Stan/Reader/Ford because I can’t find one that fits my needs.

              Reader had been working for the Mystery Shack for a few years. They used to be a cashier but moved up to bookkeeper when Wendy took the position. Reader had been working with Stan long enough to know about the portal, about Ford, and about the paranormal things in Gravity Falls. They work with Stan on the portal and with the forest creatures. Stan’s deals with gnomes/manitaurs/etc and monthly meetings to hash out treaties and agreements. Stan has lived there long enough and knows enough to be included in the denizens of the forest. Reader has been going alone since the kids arrived for the summer. Reader had lived in the shack since they’ve worked there; just a few months Stan invited to move in because of transportation issues, jokes about how they live there anyway. Reader is arrested when NWHS happens, being held by Blubs and Durland. Stan drives out covertly to get them after the agents leave. They are introduced to Ford later that night when Ford comes up for coffee. “Who’re you?” “I live here. You’re Stanford. Figured you’d be fine from what Stan told me. Sorry I wasn't here when you got here, I was…indisposed in a jail cell.” “What do you mean?” “When they arrested Stan, they arrested me. Worked for him the longest. By the way, you’re filing system is a fucking mess. I organized everything. I’ll pull off the things on my wall later. Some of your stuff’s packed away in my room.” “How much do you know?” “You were out hopping the multiverse for who knows how long. You were doing research on something I’m not even going to begin to pretend I remember. And Stan’s been trying to figure out transuniversal quantum physics and space time distortion with my help for the past four years. I majored in Geology. Not Physics. I don’t understand it any better than he does.” “Apt. Ok, so wat is it you do for Stan?” “I’m the bookkeeper. And I occasionally knock gnomes and hawktopus out of the rafters.” Time and events progress as normal, slight alterations here and there. Ford confronts Reader about their involvement with Stan as Ford has seen Reader flirt openly with Stan. Reader flirts with Ford. Ford doesn’t know what to do about that. Gets flustered. ‘Accidentally’ walks in/spies on Stan and Reader having sex. On Stan’s road trip, Ford corners Reader (reader brings Ford food in the basement) and admits he hasn’t been with a humanoid in almost eight years. Practically begs for sex, and ends up cumming in his pants. Reader is proud they were able to get Ford that excited. “Next time, don’t hang out outside the door.” They leave and next time Stan and Reader have sex, Ford enters the room and locks the door. Stan is a bit surprised, but when Reader walks over to Ford and brings him forwards, Stan plays along. Stan sees Ford is nervous, so he takes Reader’s lead and is slow and gentle. They coax Ford with slow and gentle touches, on arms and lower legs and hands. Both Stan and Reader are naked. “Sixer, it’s okay. However, you want to do this.” Reader leans back and cuddles up to Stan, slow and fluffy touches as they wah Ford at the end of the bed. Ford hesitates, but finally he takes off his sweater, wearing a black tank top underneath. Stan baulks at Ford’s scars, but he just reaches for him instead of talking. Ford is brought down between them, Reader behind, Stan in front. Stan is soft, tracing Ford’s face and hands, while Reader rubs his back and thighs. Ford gets worked up and they help him strip. Stan holds back, assuming Ford is more interested in the Reader, but as they go along, Stan’s instinct is to touch and reassure Ford. Reader gives Ford a bj, and he’s loud. Stan, no other way to keep him quiet, kisses him. “Shhhh, Sixer. Walls aren’t that thick. Sorry. Didn’t mean to..” Ford cuts him off with another kiss. Ford moans, clutching at Stan. Reader comes up, before Ford cums, and asks what they want to do. They arrange themselves where Ford fucks the Reader, Reader lays in Stan’s arms and Ford and Stan kiss while Ford fucks Reader. Stan almost gets off on humping Reader’s ass. When Ford cums (condom and Stan masturbating Reader), Ford shifts, Reader up/over and gives Stan a hj and hickies. Ford is exhausted, and falls asleep between them. Ford sleeps thought he night (mostly) and wakes up sticky. He showers and finds both of them in the kitchen making breakfast. He’s greeted with an affectionate pat and one-armed hug by Reader and slight awkwardness from Stan. After reader/kids leave to do their things, Ford pours himself a coffee and tells Stan they should talk about what happened. “I’ll be downstairs. Whenever you are ready.” Stan goes down and they talk about what happened. How they are brothers and it was wrong, etc. And Stan just says that Ford is welcome anytime he needs. ‘I wont push ya. But it’s clear ya need it. Heck, maybe we do too.” Ford goes to them that night and as long as Reader is involved, it’s not the big I world. Even if all Reader does is watch, then it’s a kink for their lover. Reader rides Ford while Stan holds him. Stan spends the whole-time touching Ford, caressing, kissing, titillating. Ford cums with Stan whispering in his ear. Next time, Stan fucks Reader while Ford sits behind them and helps support them. Ford reaches around and fondles Stan (area not in Reader) while masturbating Reader. Reader notices Ford and Stan have some serious sexual tension and asks them both, separately, if they are comfortable with the Reader watching. They both agree, so long as the other is ok. Stan and Ford get together to discuss what they are comfortable with and it devolves into a handsy makeout in Stan’s office. They end up 69-ing that night after frotting. Ford poking at Stan and getting a strong reaction. Leads to Ford fingering Stan at later date while Stan fucks Reader.      

              After weirdmageddon, all family sleeps in the living room curled up with blankets and pillows. Ford and Stan sleep with their heads together, with feet apart. _||_ so the kids can cuddle Stan, but Ford can still talk to Stan. Stan hits on Ford (subconscious flirt) while they are trying to get his memory back and acts on impulse and kisses Ford in front of everyone. “I get the feeling we’ve done that before.” Ford says yes, and that there is a lot to explain now because no one else knew. After a week, Stan get’s his memory back, and the night after the kids leave, all three hole up in the basement and Ford had been working on a serum to give them a boost (aphrodisiac) and they go all night.                

-Ford and Stan find themselves in the Boiling Isles

[ramblesanddragons]

I Want To Learn To Fight

Needed a small break from A Man Made of Stone and here’s a little late entry or week four of @stanuary while I play with writing style. The theme was fight.

Warnings: Some violence but nothing graphic.

AO3 link!!

“Grunkle Stan, will you teach me how to box?” Dipper says after a few days back in the shack.

“I mean I can sure but why do you want to?” Stan peers over his paper at the kid, he’s grown since last summer but he’s still not built like a fighter. Of course, Ford wasn’t either.

“It looked like good exercise?”

“Nah, if I’m doing it, I need to know why,” Stan folds the paper and looks the kid in the eye, “I’m not gonna judge you. What’s up?”  

“You’re not going to judge me huh?”  

“With this? Nah.”

“Okay fine,” Dipper gets closer to whisper to his grunkle, “It’s my noodle arms. I’m just tired of being so I don’t know...noodley.”  

Okay Stan can buy that. He stands and heads upstairs. “Is that a yes?”

“Come on kid we’re headed to the mall.”

Stan knows that his gloves are still way too big for the kid so he buys him some gloves (and pockets a bit of new tape for their hands.) When they get back home, they find some sort of decent space to learn. Between the elder twins, the younger twins, Soos, Melody, and Soos’ Abuelita the shack was pretty full. Soos’ renovations have done a great job of giving everyone a space (and got rid of a lot of the triangles) but they end up having to set up shop in a part of the lab. If Ford minds, he doesn’t say and goes upstairs to find Mabel with a pat on Dipper’s head.

Dipper pulls on the gloves and swings wildly. “Alright I’m ready!”

“No, you’re not. Come here and I’ll teach you to wrap your hands.” Stan starts by doing his own and then has Dipper try and copy. The kid is sharp and has it right by his second hand.  

“When you get into a random fight you don’t have time to wrap your hands. What’s the point of it now?” Dipper asks trying to get used to the feel of the wraps.

“To make sure your hands are in one piece when you don’t have the time. You mess up your hands and wrists here you’re screwed out there. Why are you worried about random fights anyway?”

“Just an observation. Anyway, I’m ready to hit things!” He says with a fire behind his eyes.

Stan laughs, “Not the way you’re standing.”  

A gentle shove immediately puts Dipper off balance so they start with lessons on a grounded fighting stance and footwork. As to not disappoint the boy too much Stan does let him take swings at his gloved hands before they call it a night. Dipper’s out of breath by the end.

“Look kid, I know this isn’t what you were expecting but I’m tryin’ to teach ya right. If you want to stop, I’ll understand. If you want to keep going though, I think you could throw a decent punch.” Stan expects Dipper to be frustrated, which he is, but is surprised by the boy’s smile.

“I should have figured I need to know the basics first. It’s okay I want to keep going. This was fun and I want to learn.”

Stan smiles back.  

Over the next few weeks, the lessons continue. Foot drills, hand drills, basic punches. The kid has always been bright and he may not get the practice of it right at first, he gets the theory down. Stan changes up his teaching a bit, does some reading and tries things out with the kid. What worked for him doesn’t always work for Dipper and he tries to figure out a way that does. Dipper really starts to shine when Stan starts talking about reading a situation and analyzing an opponent.  

One day after a good session the boys head back upstairs to find kitchen the same way it has been during these sessions, covered in papers of art. Ford and Mabel spend most boxing times drawing together. Dipper talks about the lesson while she shows off her art (Dipper and Stan fighting a giant robot) and they head to bed.

“Sounds like it’s going well.” Ford’s smile is soft. He’s adding details to his drawing (Him and Mabel as cats per her request) and stops to observe his twin.

“It is. He’s good. He’s ready to start sparing but I’ve got 200 pounds and a couple of feet on the kid. I know how to pull my punches but I don’t want to hurt him by accident. By the way I’ve been meaning to ask ya if you ever figured what got this boxing thing in his head?” Stan unwraps his hands and leans back in the chair.  

“Well he does admire you and I believe he wishes to strengthen his body for his own reasons.” Ford starts to talk while beginning a new sketch as Stan starts snoozing, missing most of what his brother says. Ford manages to talk his brother into actually going to bed and, afterwards, walks down to the lab inspired.  

“What the hell is this Sixer?” Stan gawks the next morning while Dipper laughs at it. In the lab is a 13-year-old sized robot made of gears and pillows.

“I made Dipper an adequate sparring partner. Programed with what I recall from our boxing lessons and it has an interface you can run much like one of Soos’ video games. After calling up Fiddleford for some input it should be ready.”

“AWESOME!” Dipper immediately goes to wrap his hands.  

“Heh. Thanks Ford.”

“You’re welcome.” Ford begins to walk up the stairs and chuckles as he hears Dipper say, “Hey, not the first time I’m fought a robot!”  

A few more weeks go by. Its Gravity Falls so the supernatural is everywhere and the Pines family is right there in it all. There hasn’t been that many repeats of last summer’s nightmares and Stan is thankful for that. With his brother around it’s easy to keep the kids out of trouble or at least help fight it off. Of course, one night everything goes to hell and it had to be Pioneer day.

Stan and Ford find themselves at one end of the town square when the screaming starts. People run off or jump into their covered wagons. A horde of shambling zombies our pouring out of the graveyard.  

“Ahh Dipper I hope this one ain’t on you.” Stan mumbles as he pulls on the familiar brass knuckles. Ford pulls out his pistol.

“I don’t believe he would do this twice, he told me how badly things went last year. Something else is wrong.” Ford fires and takes the heads off of three zombies while Stan crushes a fourth.

(They’d later discover that a small rift had opened in the grave yard and was leaking out necrotic energy from a dying dimension. Rifts that came out of nowhere were as annoying and common place in Gravity Falls as deer causing problems in the roads after the events of the summer before. Easly fixed but annoying as hell.)

“It’s fine,” Stan says as he bashes two zombie heads together, “We’ll just sing them dead again although you’re singing this time. I hope you still have that zombie bite cure somewhere Sixer!”

“I do but the victims of the bites still need to be in one piece for it to work Stanley. We must find the kids before they’re torn apart!” Stan’s punching becomes a little more desperate and wilder as they make their way through the town. Ford has a theory and Stan thanks God his brother is right as they round a corner and see that all of the kids made their way to the local karaoke bar.  

It’s a hell of a site. Melody and Soos are trying to break down the door, Pacifica is trying to break a window with her heels while Mabel uses a knitting needle, Wendy has he axe to keep one half of the zombies away, and (to Stan’s utter horror and pride) Dipper is holding the other half off on his own. His stance is flawless and he’s using his smaller, quicker size to his advantage. The elder Pines twins reach the kids just as Dipper knocks the jaw off of one of the monsters. These things are mindless though and it’s hard to read an opponent that doesn’t think. Dipper almost takes a bite to the ear as a zombie lunges low but Stan catches it and tosses the thing across the road. Dipper and Stan stand back to back as Ford ushers Pacifica out of the way and blasts the window open with his fancy space gun. He crawls in with Mabel and pulls Pacifica in too. Soos halfway tosses Melody in the window screaming, “Sing for our lives my songbird!”

“Okay?!” Melody yells back.  

It takes agonizing seconds for Ford to get the power to the bar going as the rest fight off the zombies. Stan’s about to toss the rest of the kids into the window and block the way before one gets on his back.

“Get off my Grunkle!” Dipper screams and drags it off of Stan. He tosses the thing and manages to get it almost as far as Stan’s zombie.  

Suddenly the music starts behind the fighters and it takes a few verses for Stan to recognize it. “Big boat keep on burnin’! Proud Cary keep on turnin! Swimming! Swimming! Swimming down the river!” Melody, Mabel, and Ford are having the most terrifyingly fun time of their lives as the zombies start to explode.

By sunset the town is doing clean up and the “Never Mind All That” law will be in full effect by tomorrow. The Pines have found themselves back home. Everyone else gets cleaned up while Ford orders a ton of pizza. Dipper makes as far as the porch before flopping onto the couch. Stan joins him.

“Look Grunkle Stan it wasn’t me this time,” Dipper starts.  

“Yeah I know,” Stan pats Dipper’s head, “You were incredible out there today by the way. I know I’m still tough on ya...”

“You’ve taught me how to fight back,” Dipper says as he pulls himself to a sitting position.

“Last summer after the first zombie attack, I wanted to learn how to do what you did but I was so caught up in... well a lot of things and I kept meaning to ask you but things kept getting crazier.”  

Dipper kind of smiles and looks at his slime covered hands, “I realized that maybe I could be smart and strong and if anything bad like last summer happened ever again I wanted to be able to fight it.”  

“It’s best to out think than outfight most of the time kid if you can but I get that. But why me? Ford’s become some sort of nerd outlaw in the past 30 years. You could learn from him?” Stan knows the kids love him. (That was one of the first facts he knew after waking up from the memory wipe.) He doesn’t know if he deserves it but he’s happy that they do. Oh, he knows that Dipper relates more to his nerdy brother, which doesn’t hurt Stan’s feeling. It’s important for kids to have someone to relate too doesn’t matter who. He loves Dipper always.  

Dipper lets out a small tired laugh, “I’ve always admired how hard you fight for us and I want to be like that. To be able to fight for my family.”

Stan beams.  

“It’s totally not because I want to spend time with you too. No not at all,” Dipper finishes with a study but not hurtful jab to Stan’s stomach.  

“Yeah, yeah. Sure. I just figure I can teach ya something useful while I’m stuck with you little gremlins. Now come on get cleaned up. You gotta eat and then get some rest. You’ve proven you’re past all the baby stuff. Lessons are about to get a whole lot harder starting tomorrow. Ya up for it?”  

“Bring it on.”  

[wendip-week]

Wendip Week 2018, Part 2: Typical Pines Luck

Hey guys, sorry for not posting these here during Wendip week. Let me give you a run-down of the background: I made my Wendip Week in context of the Kamen Rider Weird series I’m writing, which takes place in the future of SuperGroverAway’s universe (with ddp456 influence….yes, I had permission from them both). As a result, the main characters - including Phoebe, their daughter - from my series are co-hosts for this week. I’ll post more of Wendip Week here, but for those of you who want to read the main story, follow me on fanfiction.net or leave a guest review. Now, then, here’s part 2 of Wendip Week 2018:

################################################################################################

“Let’s play a game, Phoebe.” Ken sat up in his chair straight. “I’m going to give you a prompt, and you say a phrase at a time to answer the prompt.”

“I’m motivated more by curiosity than anything else.” Phoebe said, slowly sitting up herself. “Shoot.”

Ken snorted mischievously. “You know you’re a Pines when…”

Phoebe leaned back. “You deal with the paranormal?”

Ken shook his head. “Could be Scooby-Doo.”

“You visit Oregon every year?”

“Your grandparents don’t….”

Phoebe thought for a second. “Things just go wrong for no reason?”

Ken leaned back. “There we go. Now from what I hear, Wendy learned this lesson in a pretty wacky way.”

Phoebe rolled her eyes. “Try to be more specific, she probably learned this about twelve times in her life.”

“Well, ok, then…she one day learned just how deep it runs in the family lore…”

###########################################################################################

Wendy sighed as she cut the last of the branches off the dying tree, save the one she was on. Being an arborist for the Parks department definitely had its perks - being in nature, climbing fifty feet into the air, using the skills she was born with. But every so often she had to admit that dealing with a fir that had to be cut down was grueling work. For safety reasons, some of the branches of this one were deemed as necessary to cut off before the tree itself could be dealt with - it had taken up her entire day. But at least it was done now…time for her to call it in and go home.

With that she picked up her walkie-talkie and spoke into it. “Ground team, I’m done here. Get the buzzsaws ready.”

“Roger that, Corduroy, we’ll have it set up.”

With that, Wendy did what she had done a few thousand times in her life - she undid her belt, looped it around the trunk, and began walking down.

Her leisurely descent was interrupted by an unwelcome sound - the buzzing of a saw cutting through wood right below her. A sinking feeling emerged in her chest as she pulled her walkie-talkie up and asked. “Smith, what are you doing? I’m still up here!”

“Oh nuts, they must have misunderstood me when I said be ready - they already began chopping. Hang on - fellas, stop! She’s still up there! What do you mean you - oh no.”

“Smith…” Wendy radioed in. “What’s happening?”

“Wendy, it’s stuck! They got it stuck, in the trunk, and they can’t turn it off! The saw is just freely cutting into the tree. There’s no way around it - she’s going down!”

As if on cue, Wendy felt the weight of the trunk shift to the right, fully aware that in three seconds she would be in freefall. As she saw another tree nearby, she moaned, “Oh man, I’m gonna regret this.” She loosened the belt buckle ever so slightly, took out her hatchet and aimed at the other tree.

“Just about…NOW!” She pushed off the trunk with her legs, the loosened belt being completely undone as she hurtled towards the other tree hatchet-first. The hatchet dragged down a full five feet of the bark before finally being embedded in and halting her descent.

The radio buzzed “Don’t worry, chief, we’ll get you down.” Still, she couldn’t help but have a single thought;  this has never happened before…

######################################################################################

She fingered the phone in her hands, scrolling through her contacts to find someone to talk to about the day. Her fingers hovered above Dipper’s name, but realized her boyfriend would be too panicky. His mom too. Mabel and her own friends would have the opposite problem because she came out OK. Eventually she landed on the one person she knew longer than some of the rest - and, although she loathed to admit it, had been a mentor once or twice before.

She heard the crockety old man’s voice respond on the other end. “Wendy? What in the blazes are you calling me for?”

Wendy sighed. “Well, Stan, to be honest, I need someone to give their honest opinion. Something strange happened today.” She explained her physical trials from that day. “It should not have been possible.”

After a pause, she heard Stan laughing on the other end. Wendy frowned. “Mr. Pines, how can you think this is funny?”

“No, it’s not that….it’s just…it’s finally affecting you…”

“What is?”

“You and the squirt are engaged now, right?”

Wendy looked at the engagement ring on her finger. “Yeah, it’s been a few weeks. What’s your point?”

“I love the little guy, I really do, but he has the worst luck on Earth! The monsters, the dates…heck, I remember when he pelted you in the eye with a baseball! You finally are part of the family if you’re getting the Pines luck!”

Wendy felt a chill down her spine. “Oh, boy…listen, can you not tell Dipper about this?”

Stan just replied, “What’s that, the connection is loose - ” and hung up.

“Stan, I - dang it!” Wendy stowed her phone in frustration, fully aware of how her fiancee would take this.

###################################################################

“Your gregrunle is a jerk,” Ken chuckled.

“Yeah, well, tell me something I don’t know,” Phoebe rolled her eyes. “Still, doesn’t change the fact that when Mom visited Dad a week later to have a date night and plan the wedding a bit..”

##############################################################################

“Hey, I’m here…Dipper?”

Dipper looked up from his work on the table and hastily started closing books. “Oh, hey Wendy, I…woah, I lost track of time, heh heh…” He began gathering things in his arm to hastily put them away.

“You alright, man? This seems like your, well, itchy mode.” Wendy lightly teased.

Dipper honestly answered “Well… somewhat, but…”

Unfortunately for him, at that particular moment two Journals fells out of the pile of books and opened to clearly marked pages. Wendy had already seen the first one before - Journal One’s entry on unicorn hair. Which made it all the more suspect that Journal Four opened to a page on countercurses.

Dipper chuckled weakly. “Busted, huh?”

“You bet, man.” Wendy sat down next to him. “This about the accident last week? I’m fine, I swear.”

Dipper groaned. “I know you are, but…it feels like you’re inheriting the family’s bad luck. My proclivity to get into danger, Mabel’s dating history prior to meeting Mel, Ford’s thirty years of dimension-hopping…there’s some common link behind it, some string of bad luck. I was looking for a way to break it after hearing that it passed on to you. I mean, I just….why?” He buried his face into his hands.

Wendy gave Dipper a supportive pat on the back. “Come on, Dipper, you’re smarter than that. You mean to tell me just now you learned I’m infected?”

Dipper looked up. “What?”

Wendy held up the still-open Journal Number One. “Having to fight unicorns.” She dropped it, saw Journal Number Three on the table, and flipped it to the page about the bunker security system. “Nearly being squashed by moving pillars in an underground room.” She concluded by opening to a page Dipper had added about the now defunct Society of the Blind Eye. “early forgetting who I am.” Dropping all of these, she then looked Dipper straight in the eye. “All within a few months of meeting you, before I was even sixteen. The truth is, I started getting into bad situations immediately after meeting you and Mabel.”

Dipper looked at her. “And you’re saying you’re OK with that?”

Wendy smiled. “I chose to be in each of those situations. And every day, every month, every year I spent with you, I knew that I was inviting the same choice, and I would give the same answer. Because you know what? That’s only half of Pines luck.”

“Really?” Dipper perked up a bit. “What’s the other?”

“Knowing that you’ll get out of it okay. Because you’re a Pines.” Wendy flashed him the engagement ring she had accepted some time ago before continuing. “And when I become one, I’ll have that same faith because my guy will always have my back when I need it most. So stop worrying about it until it happens, ok?” She waited for his answer, wondering if the poor guy would be able to turn off the anxiety that always seemed to exist in his mind.

Dipper’s brain, however, was filled with more than that. It looked at the woman who was his fiancee and remembered the night he had given her the ring. All the craziness of wolves attacking and yet she stood by him, without even a trace of doubt when she accepted his proposal afterwards. How many times did he survive simply because she was there? It was with this mindset that he pulled her in for a hug. “You really are the best, you know that?”

Wendy laughed as she returned the hug and pecked him on the cheek. “Yeah, yeah, your lumberjack queen and all.” As they broke it up, she replied, “How about we cut the sappy stuff for now and watch another B-rated horror film?”

Dipper grinned. “That’s not even a question, is it?”

########################################################################################

“So, riddle me this” Ken got up to stretch a bit. “Did Stan tell him specifically to get them to have this conversation?”

Phoebe shrugged. “It’s not his style, but honestly? The whole family loved playing matchmaker with those two.”

“Even after they found him a find, caught her a catch?” Ken grinned.

Phoebe shook her head in disappointment. “Worst excuse and method to spring a Fiddler on the Roof reference. Ever. Of all time.”

[crossroadsdimension]

Didn’t think I was gonna leave things where I did, did ya?

Putting the chapter under the cut for people too lazy to go over to AO3.

Chapter 3 -- Fishy Stalker

Stan knew that something was up again when Ford came in from the deck for breakfast and was wearing that coral rebreather over his face.

“Disappeared for a midnight swim?” Stan asked dryly.

Ford blinked a couple times, the haze leaving his eyes. He frowned at the rebreather on his face and took it off, then set it on the table and sat down before starting to gnaw on his breakfast -- eggs and pancakes, maybe a tad overcooked but still edible.

Stan put down his fork. “Ford.”

“Hmm?” Ford looked up.

“Midnight swim. Again?” Stan motioned to the rebreather.

Ford sighed, then looked down at his breakfast and started poking it absently with his fork. “I can’t resist it, Stanley. The enchantment’s...rewired my brain somehow. Or-or caused some kind of muscle memory reaction to override anything that I happen to be thinking at the moment or--”

“Hey. We’ll think of something. We’re almost to Gravity Falls; if anyplace is gonna have what we’re gonna need, it’s there.” Stan picked up his fork again. “Now, come on. Eat up. Not exactly gonna be able to do this magic thing on an empty stomach.”

Ford nodded in agreement, then went back to his meal as Stan finished off his and put the plates in the sink. “We should be able to reach Gravity Falls this afternoon. Are the kids already--”

“Two days ago,” Stan replied. “Got a call from ‘em when you were takin’ your nap.”

“Ah.”

“I think Mabel’s torn between thinking your situation’s adorable or terrible.”

Ford’s brow furrowed. “And Dipper?”

“Terrified for you. He’s been digging up myths and books on sirens and it sounds like he doesn’t like what he’s been finding. Nothin’ yet on a reversal spell.”

“Hopefully there will be something in my library that will give us hints as to what could be done.” Ford sighed. “As..grateful as I am that Adeline’s kept the sea monsters in this part of the Pacific at bay, I…I don’t want to think about the fact that I know she can pull me under her enchantment at any time and affect the way I think and act with just her voice, and that when she does...nothing else seems important. It’s terrifying.”

“We’ll figure something out,” Stan repeated. “I’ll take care of steering the ship for a bit.” He moved out of the cabin and onto the deck, patting his brother on the shoulder reassuringly on the way out.

Adeline was leaning over the side of the ship again, near the helm. “Is my pet going to go to sleep?”

“Probably, since you woke him up in the middle of the night. Again.” Stan frowned at her disapprovingly.

Adeline swung herself up to sit on the railing. Instead of the octopus lower half, she had the fish tail that Stan had been expecting to see the first time. “Good. Because I told him to go sleep. I like having him awake when he’s with me.”

Stan grumbled something under his breath that caused the siren to frown. She flicked her tail at him, causing water to sprinkle against his face. He didn’t give her even the slightest hint of a reaction.

She’d done that every few days for the last few weeks; it wasn’t hard to get used to something Stan had grown to expect.

“You’re lucky I’m here to protect my pet,” Adeline said pointedly. “There was a small kraken here last night who wanted to make a snack out of your boat.”

“Uh huh.” Stan double-checked the instruments around the helm. Good weather, good wind, and nothing was being picked up on the sonar. Course, a big thing would end up appearing there later, but Stan was expecting that -- the siren had to go back underwater sometime, and she hadn’t shown that she could grow a pair of legs to stay on the ship.

Not yet, anyway. If she could change from octopus tentacles to a mer tail, she could probably walk around like a human, too.

“I’ll be expecting a thank-you later.”

“Uh huh. Right.”

Stan felt more water get flicked at him. “I mean it, human.”

“Did you really think we wouldn’t have been able to handle that thing on our own?” Stan turned and gave Adeline a pointed look. “My brother’s survived for thirty years fighting off monsters in other dimensions; I spent ten evading the mafia and avoiding getting killed here on land. We’re two grown men who can handle ourselves.”

Adeline frowned at that. “That I find hard to believe.”

“Well, it’s the truth.” Stan turned back to the wheel. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’ve got a brother ta get home so that we can reverse whatever ya did to him.”

He was half-expecting the siren to answer, but when he heard the splash off the side of the ship instead, a satisfied grin crossed his face.

Just a few more hours, and they’d be able to get to Gravity Falls and see about fixing Ford’s head.

Time Break

Ford knew there was more going on than just the siren’s song constantly running through the back of his mind. When he woke up hours after breakfast, he felt a strange need to be petted that instantly sent a wave of alarm through him.

Adeline’s spell was working its way into the times when he was aware, and if they didn’t do something about it before it became too late--

Ford shook the thought out of his head and pushed himself out of his bunk. It was something that he would have to discuss with Stan and the others, when they were safely back on land and back in the Mystery Shack.

The thought of solid ground under his feet shouldn’t have caused the chill of worry to run down his spine like it did; some part of his mind silently begged him to stay at sea, to let the rocking waves soothe him.

He pushed the thought to the back of his mind, back to the music it had originated from, and made his way out onto the deck.

Stan was alone on deck, standing at the helm. He looked back as Ford approached. “Glad to see you up. I was about ta go in there and wake you up myself when we hit port.”

Ford grunted in response, looking up and down the coast. The song at the back of his mind tried to make him feel uneasy, but he pushed it out of his focus.

“I hope you didn’t think I was going to sleep the day away,” Ford said instead.

“Well, that siren chick said she was gonna make ya sleep; she just didn’t say fer how long.”

“At least I’m able to choose when I want to wake up.” Ford frowned at the sea disapprovingly, and when the song strengthened in his mind, he shuddered.

“Hey. You feelin’ okay?”

Ford pulled back from the railing a couple steps. “I think there’s more going on in my mind than just what she said.”

Stan looked over at his brother worriedly. “Still think we can find that reversal?”

“I should hope so.”

Stan frowned at Ford’s comment, but he said nothing as he brought them up to the docks they were approaching. Three familiar figures were already standing there waiting for their ship to pull up.

Ford dropped the anchor as Stan threw the ropes down and leapt off the side of the ship; only after tying the ship down did Dipper and Mabel leap at Stan for a hug as Ford leaned over the railing on the ship, contemplating leaping off onto solid ground.

The song at the back of his mind once again tried to make him feel uneasy about the idea, but he ignored it in favor of reaching his niblings and leapt off himself.

“Grunkle Ford!” Dipper instantly ran to him. “Are you feeling okay?”

“As...as well as I can be,” Ford replied carefully. He heard a splash somewhere on the other side of the ship and fought to ignore it.

Dipper noticed Ford turn his head slightly at the sound; he took his grunkle’s hand and practically dragged him to the car -- Stan’s old Diablo. It looked like it had been fixed up. “Come on; we can talk about getting that stuff out of your head.”

“An excell--”

Ford winced as the song suddenly went discordant as he left the dock and got onto more solid ground. He gritted his teeth, a part of him wanting to move back and dive into the ocean just so that he could get the damn noise to shut up.

He felt someone push him from behind as he was forced into the back of the Diablo; Stan sat on one side and Dipper on the other as Mabel climbed up into the front next to Soos.

Ford clapped his hands over his ears and gritted his teeth as Stan kept a tight grip on him; the further they moved from the ocean, the more discordant it became; he found himself unable to think other than needtogetbacktotheseaneedtogetbacktotheseaneedtogetbacktothesea--

And then suddenly the discordant sounds stopped, and it settled back into the siren’s song he was used to hearing as Ford came back to his senses with a gasp.

“Grunkle Ford?” Dipper asked, hesitant.

“She’s following us,” Ford said.

Stan stiffened. “You have got to be kidding me. How do you--”

“It doesn’t sound like nails screeching on a chalkboard in here anymore.” Ford pointed at his head. “And I don’t feel like I need to punch and kick my way out of this car to get back to shore.”

The others stared at him.

Mabel chuckled nervously. “Um. O-okay. Grunkle Ford, when Grunkle Stan said you were met and hypnotized by a siren, I didn’t think this would happen.”

Ford sighed irritably, rubbing his temples. “I should have expected something similar. Being dragged underwater and drowned or something similar, yes, but not being considered a pet with a mental leash attached to the sea.” There was a growling rumble in his voice.

“You said the siren’s name was Adeline?” Dipper was paging through a book he’d pulled from his vest.

Ford felt a shudder run down his spine at the name. “Yes.”

“Mermando said she was a recluse who saw humans as creatures that didn’t know what they were doing.” Dipper looked up. “The fact that she’s following us kinda goes against her usual MO.”

“Considering she seems pretty attached to Ford, I think that she just wants him back,” Stan said flatly. “So we gotta get this song outta Ford’s head before it does who knows what else to him other than turn him into a pile of putty every time she shows up.”

Ford didn’t look too happy at the comparison; he sighed irritably instead.

Mabel and Dipper exchanged worried looks.

“That doesn’t sound good, doods,” Soos said. “Hey -- you think this siren is gonna need water sometime?”

“They can’t live outside of water for long, so yeah,” Dipper replied. “She’s basically like an amphibian, but...more fish-y.”

“And human-y,” Mabel added.

“Yeah.”

“So, hypothetically, she could follow the river backwards up the coast to the lake in Gravity Falls?”

Ford heard the song in his head change key.

“I think that’s more than likely,” Ford muttered.

The others looked at Ford again.

“Lock Ford in the basement when we get back to the house?” Soos asked.

“Yup,” the others in the car responded at once.

Ford sighed. “So long as we can get this song out of my head, that’s fine. But we need this spell reversed, or else….”

“Or else?” Dipper repeated nervously.

Ford swallowed. “Or else even without Adeline nearby, I fear her enchantment may overtake me completely.”

The fact that Ford had just admitted Ford was afraid made the tension in the car increase tenfold.

“We’ll figure this out, Grunkle Ford!” Mabel exclaimed with determination. “We beat a dream demon last summer who set off the apocalypse, we can get this fixed too!”

Ford really hoped that they would be able to. Because otherwise, things could end up getting far worse.

[thesnadger]

See You Next Summer

A super-quick Finaleversary fic. Thanks to Scribe for being willing to beta fics I toss at her with zero warning at the spur of the moment. Love to her, and to everyone I’ve met through Gravity Falls.

Ao3

The end of summer. 2012.

Candy and Grenda go back to Grenda's place after seeing Mabel off. They'd planned a sleepover in advance, knowing that they'd need several hours of cuddling, cookie dough and playing dress up with Grenda's lizard to ease the sting of saying goodbye. Candy sits up on Grenda's shoulders, because they need Grendy to help themselves feel big and tough right now, and Grenda makes howling and roaring sounds for all she's worth, but it's still a sad day.

They pass Pacifica sitting out on the curb. She looks like she might be waiting for someone. Actually, by the way she's sitting with her face in her hands, she looks like she might have been waiting for a while. Candy glances down at Grenda, and a look passes between them. Should they ask if something's wrong? Somehow even after living through the end of the world, after seeing all social order turned upside down, it would still feel weird to go up to the most popular girl in school (the same girl who's cut them up with cruel words more times than they can count) and ask if she's all right.

Mabel would have done it. But Mabel isn't there, and Candy and Grenda both badly want to get home to the blanket nest and stack of videos they know is waiting for them, so they walk on and leave Pacifica alone.

2013. The end of summer.

Pacifica isn't exactly friends with Candy and Grenda. No, no, she'd never call them that. But, you know. Hanging out with them makes her look good by comparison.

Their middle school is outside Gravity Falls's city limits, and more than half of the kids who go there have no idea that the world nearly ended one summer ago. That makes it hard for Pacifica to relate to most of her friends. It's even harder to be around her parents. So when Candy and Grenda invited her to their pre-party sleepover at Grenda's house, she'd surprised herself by saying yes. It wasn't as if it'd be the first time she'd been seen in public with them, anyway. They'd already come to her rescue after she'd angered that tiny civilization that had been living under her parents' garage. And she'd helped them bribe a courier to get some weird glowing packages to Mabel.

Pacifica rides on the back of Grenda's bike, clinging to her shoulders as they barrel down the hill. Candy pedals a short distance behind, giggling wildly. Pacifica feels nauseous and dizzy and kind of excited, all at the same time.

The end of summer. 2012.

Wendy lays on her back across the counter of the gift shop, not even making a pretense of working. She's not sure why she showed up, honestly. The Shack isn't even open, no one's giving tours, but she's starting school again tomorrow and for reasons she couldn't explain if you put a gun to her head, she wants to spend her last day of freedom here. At work. Even knowing there's no chance she could get a cheapskate like Stan to pay her for showing up when he didn't ask her to. Though really, she doesn't even work for him anymore. Not since he gave the Shack to Soos.

She rests her feet on the cash register and moans about the upcoming year. She's only half-joking when she says she did better in an apocalyptic wasteland than she did in high school. She doesn't fit there. It isn't just the academic part, it's everything. It's just not for her.

Soos is trying to listen sympathetically, but his gaze keeps drifting over to the fez hanging off a hook in the corner. He'd put it on again after Dipper and Mabel's birthday party, in front of the bathroom mirror. It wasn't the first time he'd seen the fez on himself—he'd tried it on sneakily dozens of times over the years, whenever Mr. Pines left it unattended. But for once it wasn't just a dream. It was real. It meant something now.

He fingers the claw marks left on the counter by the Gremloblin Dipper brought in when Stan went on vacation and left Mabel in charge. He'd been pretty excited at Mabel's hug-centric approach to business, one he'd initially hoped Mr. Pines might take a shine to eventually. He was over the moon when she showed him his new costume. But Mr Pines had been right...he couldn't handle the responsibility of being a question mark. Mabel couldn't handle running the Shack, at least not the way she wanted to. And Mabel and Dipper were like, tiny little superheroes. If she couldn't handle this job, what makes him think that he can?

2013. The end of summer.

Soos straightens the fez so that the tassel won't flop over his face while he's driving and opens the passenger door of his pickup truck.

“Hop in! We're not stopping till we hit party central! Or until we hit a stoplight. We'll probably stop then, too.”

Wendy snorts and climbs in, kicking her feet up on the dashboard. “Thanks for the ride, Soos. I can totally get you back for this now that I've got my license.”

“Ain't no thing, dawg.” Soos smiled. “Least I can do after you put out that fire in the gift shop last week.”

“Heh, yeah. That totally wasn't your fault, though, you told that guy from Topeka that the Chimera didn't like flash photography.”

Soos chuckles and turns on the radio, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel. Six months ago, an incident like that would have probably sent him into a panic. But now, he takes things like that in stride. It wasn't as if there had never been fires, or roof collapses, or sky-shark attacks when Mr. Pines had been in charge of things. Things like that were probably just part of running your own business. Something Soos just barely, on a good day, believes he's getting the hang of.

“Hey, don't you have to go back to school on Monday? You haven't been complaining about it at all. What gives?”

Wendy flips the brim of her hat up and smiles. “Eh. School still sucks and all, but last year wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be. Turns out getting a reputation as a badass survivalist actually gains you some street cred. Plus, this year I get to take shop class and mess around with power tools, so that'll be kinda cool.”

“Neat. Lemmie know if you need any pointers, I can jazz up a birdhouse like nobody's business.”

“I'll keep that in mind.” Wendy smirks, nodding at the radio. “Oh hey, turn it up!”

“Seriously? I thought you hated this song.” Soos says, adjusting the dial.

“I do. But hey, memories, right?”

The end of summer. 2012.

So much about these woods feels distantly familiar. And so much of it feels completely alien.

Ford keeps his hand on Stan's arm as they walk, not quite willing to let him go. It's irrational, really. Stan's recovery has been impressively quick, Ford has no reason to act like this...as if he's going to get confused and wander off suddenly. But the contact is as much for Ford's sake as Stan's. A reminder that his brother is still there. A reminder that he's there with him. That they're together, and all of this is real.

Everything in this dimension seems just slightly left of familiar to him now. An uncanny-valley sort of feeling, one that reminds him at every turn just how long he's been away. Stan laughed so hard the first time Ford had tried talking to an ATM machine. He wasn't laughing so much when one of the rubber-masked monsters in some silly television program they were watching sent Ford into a panic attack.

For the most part, Ford had spent the past few days hovering over Stan. Even after the bulk of Stan's memories returned, Ford still felt jumpy. Anxious. Guilty, if he was being honest. Guilty that it had taken something so extreme for him to finally appreciate his brother.

But that was all right. All that meant was that, well, that he'd have to make up for lost time.

Ford's fingers dig into the sleeve of Stan's “goodbye sweater” as they walk. Stan's humming something—some quiet, tuneless melody that fills the silence between them, and Ford feels affection wash over him at the familiar habit. He remembers Stan making up nonsense melodies and singing to himself while he worked on his car or bounced a ball against their bedroom door. On impulse, he throws an arm over Stan's shoulders, pulling him a little closer and holding him a little tighter, a part of him still afraid that he might slip away.

2013. The end of summer.

Stan remembers these woods. He spent a few decades of his life searching through them, looking for something that had been under his nose the whole time.

He remembers the house they're now headed to, even if he's never had much reason to be inside it before. He remembers everything now. Or, if not everything, at least as much as a man his age might be expected to remember. That's enough for him.

He's had a whole year of new memories since that day he woke up the clearing, somewhere in these woods. It's been...well. It's been a good year. And a bad one. There have been some dark times in it, and hard times, and plenty of dangers, for both him and Ford. But looking back on it...it's been good. One of his better years. One that he'll be glad to remember.

He notices a twig stuck to Ford's sweater, and absently reaches over to pick it off. Ford's sweater is green, while his is blue, but both of them have “Welcome Back!” written on the front of them in colorful bubble lettering. Stan grins a little, lifts his hand and ruffles Ford's hair, pushing it so that it flops over his face even more than usual.

“Cut it out!” Ford laughs. “What was that for?”

Stan shrugs. “Bein' a nerd?”

“Pfft. That's your excuse for everything you do to me.”

“Only because it always fits.”

Ford elbows him, and the two of them laugh as they walk, and it's a beautiful day. Sometimes, a beautiful day isn't enough. Sometimes a good day and a walk in the woods and even, against all odds, his family by his side telling him they love him, sometimes it isn't enough. But today it is, and Stan Pines is happy.

Ford grins a childish grin at him, pointing up the path. “We're nearly there! Race you the rest of the way?”

Stan is off and running without even a reply, and he hears Ford protest that's cheating before the sound of running footsteps follow behind him. Maybe he'll get there first, and maybe Ford will, but it doesn't really matter in the end. His brother's there with him, and after a year, Stan's starting to really believe he always will be.

The end of summer. 2012.

“Ready to head into the unknown?” Dipper asks.

“Nope.” Mabel takes a deep breath. “Let's do it.”

Mabel looks at the figures running alongside the bus, watches as they fade into the distance behind it, then sighs deeply and settles into her seat. Waddles nestles into her. Maybe he senses a need for comfort in Mabel, or maybe he's just unsteady because the bus has started moving and he wants someone to snuggle up with for stability. Probably a little bit of both.

She still doesn't know how she feels about high school. She's not sure how she feels about a lot of things. But there are a few things she is sure of, and one of them is sitting next to her.

Dipper pushes the brim of Wendy's hat away from his face, briefly exposing the birthmark on his forehead before his hair flops down to cover it up again. Read it the next time you miss Gravity Falls, Wendy had said.

Dipper looks out the window and sees a sign telling them what town they're leaving. He feels a lump in his throat, and opens the letter.

2013. The end of summer.

“Aren't you ready yet?” Mabel taps her foot. “You've been messing around with that tree stump for forever. Are you sure it doesn't just look like it has a face?”

“Just five more minutes!” Dipper promises. “I know I saw it open its eyes earlier. Great Uncle Ford's gonna flip when I bring him a picture of this.”

“Or he's gonna die of old age waiting for you! C'mon, everyone else is probably there already!”

“All right, all right.” Dipper sighs and put his camera away, hurrying to catch up to Mabel.

Going back to Piedmont after all the crazy stuff that  happened last summer had been kind of surreal. But in its own way, coming back has been weirder. He isn't sure whether the town has changed or they have. Probably both. Sometimes Dipper thinks about how different things might have been if he'd never found Ford's journal in the woods. Not in terms of the big things, like Ford not coming back or the Rift never opening. But littler things.

The journal got him to open his eyes and explore Gravity Falls in a way he hadn't before. And not just when it came to supernatural things. When he was really looking at the world around him, he saw people differently too.

Mabel gives Dipper's arm a yank as she runs, all but dragging him behind her, grinning her recently braces-free smile as she hurries down the sidewalk to the big iron gates. These past three months were just what she needed. A whole year of phone calls and video hangouts and typing the word “hug” into instant messengers and finally, finally she's been getting a chance to be in the same room as all of her friends and her family. Finally she's been getting proper hugs and singing and dancing and a thousand other things that just aren't the same long distance.

Deep down, when she said goodbye to Candy and Grenda last year, a part of her wondered if it was goodbye goodbye. People were always saying that long distance friendships didn't work, that people grew apart, that it was just the way things were, and the idea of that scared her. But after a year, it scares her a lot less. A lot of scary things scare her less now.

The two of them run through the wide-open gates of the mansion.

The end of summer. 2012.

Fiddleford plucks his banjo, the notes echoing against the distant walls of one of at least a dozen bedrooms in this big old barn. In the corner, a raccoon nibbles at a piece of decorative fruit, realizes her mistake and spits out the tasteless nugget of wax.

It was surely nice to move into a place that would be cool in the summer and warm in the winter, he thinks to himself. There's no doubt about that. But a place as big as this one feels kind of lonesome when it's empty.

2013. The end of summer.

By the time Dipper and Mabel arrive, the party is in full swing. What's it celebrating? Fiddleford doesn't rightly remember, but any excuse for a hootenanny is fine by him.

Every room is a rush of noise and warmth and people. People he knows, and people he doesn't know yet. He stands at the top of the staircase, overlooking the room below him and smiles. Seems like half the town showed up today.

Normally things are quieter. But even on an ordinary day, he keeps his door open to visitors. Tate visits him on the regular. So does Pacifica, even though she puts up a big show of saying it's just so she can see what a mockery he's making of her home. There are people in his home who come to see him, people who come out of curiosity about the newly open gates, and people who come just because they needed someplace safe to sleep, and he welcomes them all equally. Sometimes he'll poke his head into a room he'd thought was empty and find he has a guest that he didn't even know about.

Fiddleford's new shack is still big, but it's never empty. Not anymore.

It's been a good summer.

[crossroadsdimension]

Old Friend

We need something to counteract the angst that @radioactivedelorean posted earlier for @a-million-chromatic-dreams‘, @witete‘s, and our Brain Trauma AU. So, more of the good ending! Follows after “Intervention” and “Reunion.”

I think you guys can guess what’s going on here, from the title.

Stan, Dipper, and Mabel watched from the hearth as Jheselbraum stood over a sleeping Ford, her hands glowing a gentle pink as they hovered over his head. The language she was chanting in didn’t sound like anything human, but Dipper wasn’t about to interrupt and ask Jhessie what it was she was saying.

Stan held up a hand and started counting down with his fingers, making a loose fist when Jhessie stopped counting and pulled her hands back as the glow faded.

“That still looks like magic to me,” Mabel said.

“I suppose that it does,” Jhessie admitted, looking over at them. “However, it is a science somewhere in the multiverse, and as it is a science of the mind, I find it the best to use to assist in Ford’s recovery.”

Ford snorted in his sleep, then opened his eyes lazily, like a cat that was in a comfortable position and didn’t want to be moved. Jhessie looked down at him with amusement and patted him on the head.

“Move or don’t move, the decision is yours,” she said lightly.

Ford grunted, then moved his arms and pushed himself upright. The movement had become easier in the last few days, although there was still something in his limbs that caused them to tremble a little. His brow furrowed in concentration as he glared at the lumps under the sheets.

Something moved, and Ford grinned. Then something moved again, and Ford had swung his legs out from under the sheets. His bare toes -- six on each foot, to match his fingers -- wriggled in the cool air.

“Are ya sure ya wanna try walking now?” Stan asked, frowning.

“I am certain.” Ford shot Stan a look. “I r-refuse to be bedridden-n for the rest of my life.”

“If you say so.”

Ford huffed at Stan, then turned his focus to his legs as he slowly pushed himself off the bed. His feet settled on the stone floor as Jhessie stood near him.

Ford kept a hand on the bed as Dipper and Mabel stood up, hopeful.

Ford lifted a leg forward...and collapsed against the bed with a yelp.

“Ya ain’t ready yet,” Stan grumbled.

“I am!” Ford snapped in reply. “M-m-my legs h-h-have j-j-just--” He cut himself off with a snarl at his own voice, unable to say what he wanted to.

“While I agree that your legs have atrophied some, I also agree with Stanley.” Jhessie slipped her hands under Ford’s shoulders and lifted him up before putting him back on the bed, a severely indignant look on his face. “It may not be the proper time yet for you to be able to walk.”

Ford huffed and folded his arms across his chest. “I-it doesn’t help th-that th-there isn’t a st-stiff place to h-hold onto.”

“Grunkle Ford’s got a point,” Dipper agreed. “I don’t see any sort of shelf that he could hold onto in order to actually move around.” He climbed up onto the bed, Mabel following suit.

“We just have to think of something.” Mabel plopped down next to Ford and rubbed her chin in thought. “There’s gotta be something we can do.”

Dipper scratched his head, then looked over at Jhessie. “And you’re sure we can’t try this outside?”

Jhessie shook her head. “There are other counterparts to Ford here; if they were to see him with you, the consequences on their own journey through the multiverse may be dire.”

“Great.” Dipper’s frown deepened.

“Maybe McGucket could --” Mabel cut herself off with a gasp. “McGucket! We promised him we’d keep him up-to-date if we found out where Grunkle Ford went!”

Ford turned his head sharply to look at his niblings. “What?”

“McGucket got really, really worked up when you and Grunkle Stan disappeared -- he’s gonna be so worried if he calls home and we don’t answer!” Mabel looked at Dipper in worry.

“Aw, geez, I forgot about him,” Stan muttered.

“Stanley,” Ford hissed.

“What? Do ya really expect me ta have perfect memory? Senior citizen, hello!” Stan waved his hands around.

“If we get McGucket here, he might be able to make something Grunkle Ford could use to make his legs stronger -- i-if, you don’t have anything here he could use.” Dipper looked up at Jhessie with a nervous expression.

Jhessie inclined her head slightly in thought.

“F-fiddleford won’t come.” Ford shook his head. “Th-the portal. It w-would sc-care him.”

“But we’ve gotta let him know you’re okay!” Mabel argued. “He’s gotta be worried so much he’s eating his hat right now!”

Ford gained an uneasy expression at the thought.

“Yup. He’d probably do that.” Stan nodded a little in agreement.

“We should at least tell him,” Dipper insisted. “But...how are we going to get to Gravity Falls?”

“I believe I have a solution to that.”

The Pines looked at Jhessie as she gave them a soft smile.

“Creating a portal is an easy task; finding a place to open a portal is a little more difficult, but not impossible. Is there a place that you think would be a good one? Out of the way, perhaps, so that no one else would stumble upon it, but close enough to your friend?”

“The garden behind the mansion,” Dipper said instantly. “It’s big enough, and it’s shielded from the rest of the town. The only people who’d have a chance of seeing it would be McGucket or Tate, but I think there’s a back corner that’s out of view of the mansion enough that they wouldn’t notice.”

“Then that is where it will open.” Jhessie picked up Ford in her arms, getting a yelp of surprise from him. “Come, then. We need to be at the entrance into the temple in order to open the portal.”

The group stepped out of the chamber and out into the hall that Dipper and Mabel had seen when they had arrived. Jhessie turned to face a large set of ornately-carved stone doors and came to a stop a short distance from them.

With a short word in the same language she had been speaking over Ford, the rip of space appeared right in front of them.

“I feel it would be wise that you would go first.” Jhessie nodded to Stan, Mabel, and Dipper. “The sight of me might cause some panic.”

Stan rubbed his right hand over his knuckles at the memory.

“Okay!” Mabel grabbed Dipper’s hand and dragged him through the portal, causing him to let out a yelp of surprise as they slipped through the wall of space and came out right in the middle of the ornate gardens that belonged to the Northwest Mansion.

Fiddleford McGucket was standing right in front of them, holding a rake like a bat.

“Git ba-- Dipper? Mabel?” Fiddleford’s eyes lost some of the fear in them as he blinked in confusion. His eyes narrowed. “Are you aliens in disguise or--”

“It’s us, McGucket!” Dipper held up his hands and stepped forward as Stan came out of the portal. “It’s okay. Just -- just put the rake down? Please?”

“Where did ya’ll just come from?” Fiddleford looked between the Pines and the portal. “Ya’ll disappear fer two weeks an’ ya’ll pop up outta somethin’ that looks like the rift in my backyard?”

“We’ve got a reason for it, Fiddlenerd.” Stan stepped forward and grabbed the rake as Fiddleford tried to swing it at him. “An’ he should be comin’ through soon.”

“He?”

Jhessie stepped through the portal, Ford in her arms and trying to move onto his side so that he could get a better look at what was going on.

“Fiddleford!”

Fiddleford looked up at Ford’s voice, and his jaw dropped when he saw the bright grin Ford had on his face. His grip on the rake loosened, allowing Stan to get it out of his hands and toss it aside.

“S-stanford?” Fiddleford asked in confusion. “But -- but--”

“Perhaps we can sit in order to discuss this?” Jhessie asked softly. “I may be far taller and stronger than you, but I can only hold a man Ford’s size for so long.”

Fiddleford jumped at her voice, looking between her, the Pines, and the portal. “Th-this way.”

Fiddleford led the group over to a gazebo that looked like it might have had a band in it at one point. He collapsed on the wooden floor and the others followed suit, with Jhessie placing Ford on the floor next to her.

“S-so...uhhh….” Fiddleford pressed his hands together uneasily. “Wh-what’s been goin’ with you fellas? Why’d ya come out of that portal? And who is the giantess?” His voice gained confidence and volume as he spoke.

“My name is Jheselbraum, although Jhessie is just as acceptable a name,” Jhessie replied. “I am from Dimension 52, where I nursed Ford back to health at one point over the course of his travels.”

Ford nodded when Fiddleford looked over at him. “She saved my life.”

“I was overrun with other versions of him who needed my assistance recently, so when I realized that Ford was in trouble again, I was unable to come to undo the damage until recently,” Jhessie continued. “If I had, things would not have become as severe as they did, and I apologize for that.”

“But Grunkle Ford’s getting better now,” Mabel added. “He can move around!”

“I c-can’t walk.” Ford frowned disapprovingly. “Not yet.”

“Your legs have atrophied some, and your nerves have yet to completely reconnect,” Jhessie explained. “It will take time.”

Ford folded his arms across his chest in a huff.

Fiddleford blinked. Ford looked more relaxed here and now than he had been when he’d last seen the man -- when he’d contacted Stan before Ford had been taken to the hospital. “Trouble with yer legs, huh? How bad is it?”

Ford wiggled his toes. “I-I am unable to ben-nd my kn-nees just yet.”

Fiddleford frowned. “Hm. Well, if it’s only been two weeks an’ yer able ta talk an’ move yer arms aroun’ without too much trouble, I bet you’ll be able ta get aroun’ ta yer legs soon enough.” He looked hopeful. “Just gotta give yer legs somethin’ ta do in the meantime ta get things back on track with ‘em.”

“E-easy in theory,” Ford replied. “H-hard in practice.”

“Well, yeah. Everythin’ takes time.” Fiddleford patted Ford’s left foot. “I’m just glad yer doin’ okay, ol’ pal. You jus’ focus on healin’; I’ll tell the rest o’ the town yer doin’ okay.”

Ford blinked in confusion.

“The rest of the town?” Dipper repeated.

“You’ve been telling them about what’s been going on?” Mabel asked in surprise.

“Well, yeah! They were real worried about ya, y’know! If yer gettin’ better they’re definitely gonna wanna know!” Fiddleford jumped to his feet. “So you’d better get back ta healin’, cause the next time I see ya, I hope ta see ya walkin’!”

With that, Fiddleford gave Ford the tightest hug he could give, which Ford returned as best he could.

Fiddleford shooed the group back to the portal after that as he danced off with a delighted cry that harkened back to his days as the town’s kook. Mabel and Dipper swore they could hear him yelling to the sky “Ford’s gonna be okay!” as they stepped back through the portal into Dimension 52.

[crossroadsdimension]

GF Drabble

So, this is just a quick little entry for @forduary that I threw together. It’s based off the “Portal” theme for the first week of the month, but I threw a bit of an AU thing in there -- we’ve got @leukaraii‘s Evil!Stan (aka Fish) chasing a Ford, and Ford kiiiinda ends his portal travels a little earlier than I think Cipher would have liked. Heh heh; no rift in the basement here. :)

Also tagging @howtotrainyournana; @blankrslate07; and @happy-fazzbear-ponies2 because I think they’d like to read this little drabble of mine.

No title for this one yet, but a temporary one is “Feeling Lucky?”

Ford was abnormally lucky when compared to his counterparts -- the Ford from Dimension K-6297, at any rate. His near-impossible lucky streak had gotten him in and out of heists for parts and supplies, bounty hunter pursuits, and accidental run-ins with less-than-desirable characters more than most would be able to count. Even he’d stopped counting long after he’d ended up on the other side of the portal, which was a length of time that he’d long stopped trying to count, as well.

Even Jheselbraum had commented on his abnormally lucky state, saying that she was surprised he hadn’t managed to get back to his home dimension sooner.

Blaster fire danced at Ford’s feet behind him, and he quickly picked up the pace as he shook himself out of his thoughts.

“Get back here, Fordsy!” yelled a gravely voice from behind him. “I wanna see how lucky you really are!”

It wouldn’t do to let his thoughts wander, when he was being chased by the Fish for the fifth time in his life.

Ford turned sharply and scrambled down an alley as Fish cackled behind him. “I don’t think my luck is going to let you catch me, Stanley!” he yelled back.

That got him a low snarl and more blaster shots aimed at his behind; a few kicked over trash collectors took those shots instead of him. “We’ll see about that, Poindexter! Yer not gettin’ away from me this time!”

That’s what he always says. Ford grinned a little to himself at the thought of the last few times that the two of them had happened to run into each other.

He caught sight of a metal fence up ahead and leapt against a wall before somersaulting over and landing on the other side before bolting again and getting out into an open street flooded with aliens and creatures from all walks of life. Booths lined the sidewalks, filled with various foods, trinkets, and clothes, and the air was filled with chattering of multiple languages that filtered through the translator Ford was wearing.

A market. And a crowded market, no less.

Ford took no time in making his way into the crowd in an attempt to disappear, glancing over his shoulder for a moment to see if Fish was following after him.

He was. The man with Ford’s face and a silver mullet had just left the alley and was scanning the crowd with his still-human eye. Or, at least, visibly human eye -- Ford had heard rumors about how the other one looked like Bill’s, but he hadn’t ever seen it for himself.

Ford turned around quickly and wove deeper into the crowd, trying to keep any thoughts of Fish or other bounty hunters in the multiverse out of his head. He just had to get out of this dimension alive and continue to concentrate on finding a way back home, not worry about what could happen if Fish managed to catch him this time.

Or any other bounty hunter, for that matter. There had been rumors of a Ford joining their ranks recently….

Ford shook his head and nearly avoided bumping against a man with pointed ears and slightly green-tinged skin. I shouldn’t think about them now. I just need to buy me some time so that I can stay away from Fish for a little while longer.

He stepped out of the crowd at the other end of the street, looked around again, then caught sight of a boarded-up building and slipped in through the yawning, darkened entrance.

“Hello, Dr. Pines.”

Ford stiffened at the sound of a voice, and he quickly moved away from the entrance and reached under his coat for a weapon. His eyes scanned the darkness quickly, trying to catch sight of the source of the voice. “Who’s there? How do you know me?”

“Calm yourself, Dr. Pines; I’m only here to assist, not arrest.” There came the sound of something metallic clanking against the ground, and a figure stepped into the light streaming in from the open doorway: an adolescent in cobalt and green armor, the child himself with indigo-colored eyes and brown hair cut short.

Ford frowned. The figure looked so human, and yet… “Who are you?”

“Joshua Langstrom.” The young man held his arms out on either side of him, spreading his fingers in their white gloves wide. “I mean you no harm, I assure you.”

“Then how do you know me?” Ford glanced towards the open doorway. If Fish was able to figure out where he was through inhuman means, he doubted that he had much time before the monster that was his brother’s counterpart managed to find him. And fighting him inside a building would not produce the best of odds.

“Who doesn’t know about Stanford Pines and his counterparts?” Joshua responded. “I myself am from a dimension where you’re considered fictional, but that’s not the reason I’m here.”

Ford glanced over at Joshua at that, eyes narrowing. “Then what is?”

“I can offer you a ride to a dimension that is far closer to home than you are right now.”

That would be Ford’s luck kicking in again. “Is there a catch?”

“No catch. It’s just something that I do.”

“Then why is it that I haven’t heard of you?”

“Heeeerrrre, Fordsy Fordsy Fordsy,” came a crooning voice outside the building. “I know you’re hiding somewhere….”

“People like me tend to keep to the shadows and don’t reveal ourselves easily, especially with people like him looking for those who would be capable of forcing gates to open to specific dimensions,” Joshua replied seriously. “I’d rather not be found by that one’s master, and I doubt that you do, either. So.” He held out his right hand. “Are you willing to trust me?”

Ford hesitated. His instincts were screaming at him to not trust this child who claimed to have a way home for him, but there was something else that was telling him that this kid might be what it was that he needed in order to get back to where he needed to be.

Was that his desperate hope making itself known?

Or was that his luck?

“Come out, come out, wherever you are….”

Ford knew that he and his counterparts weren’t known for being cautious in the best of circumstances. “Fine.” He pulled his hand out from his coat and grabbed the kid’s hand.

Joshua’s indigo eyes sparked, and one end of his mouth quirked up slightly. “K-6297? I think I can do you better than getting you closer.” He slipped his hand out of Ford’s grip.

“What are you--”

Joshua snapped his fingers, cutting Ford off as a blue flash suddenly went off under his feet, and he fell through a portal with a yelp of surprise.

The next thing Ford knew, he was sitting on the wooden floor of what appeared to be a bedroom of some kind.

And there was a boy with a blue and white trucker cap with a pine tree symbol on it staring at him with wide eyes and a dropped jaw.

“Hello, Dipper,” Joshua said casually, causing Ford’s eyes to shoot over to the boy who was standing calmly next to him.

Ford quickly rose to his feet, turning his attention to the other rather than the child who was staring at him. “Do you realize what you’ve just done?! You ripped a hole in space and time -- and not a natural one, at that! That should have created--”

“A rift, like what the machine that is in the basement of this very house is capable of?” Joshua finished casually. “This is your attic, after all.”

The boy -- Dipper, apparently -- squeaked. Loudly.

Ford stared at him, then turned his head sharply to look around the room. He saw two beds -- one covered in stuffed animals, the other being Dipper’s, more than likely -- and recognized none of it as his. Then he saw the triangular window, and the trees beyond it, and he knew.

But he had to be certain.

“You said you could do me one better than get me closer to home,” Ford hissed at Joshua.

“This is your home,” Joshua replied. “Dimension K-6297. You still carry its dimensional signature, you know -- it’s a wonderful tracking device for World Jumpers like myself. I’m glad that this one was actually one that I could reach; there have been a few that I’ve been barred from because of various obstacles.”

“World Jumper? Those are nothing more than myths! It’s impossible that people can create stable portals--”

“Just like the one we arrived here through?” Joshua raised an eyebrow as Ford found himself suddenly struck speechless. “The multiverse is far more vast than it seems to be at first glance, Dr. Pines. You are, in fact, home, and with no chance of your enemy of being able to follow us here. Now, I suggest you go downstairs and make sure that Stanley hasn’t activated your Rift Maker yet. And get to know your great-niece and nephew while you’re here? It wouldn’t do if they simply knew you as the strange man who lives in their basement and plans to kick out their other great-uncle at the end of the summer.”

With that said, Joshua snapped his fingers, and dropped through a perfectly circular blue portal that suddenly appeared in the floor before it closed up, leaving no sign of any sort of tear in space-time.

Ford stared at the place where Joshua had been standing for a moment. Lucky indeed. He turned his head to look over at Dipper, who was still staring at him with wide eyes.

The man held up a six-fingered hand and waved a little. “Ah...greetings?”

The resulting excited shriek from the boy caused the window to shatter.