#fingers crossed i'll be able to go because i could have an exam around that time ripp | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

damonsvftie · 4 years ago

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𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐎𝐧 𝐎𝐧𝐞

MEGA MASTER LIST

HARRY POTTER MASTERLIST

Summary: Teasing your boyfriend Draco Malfoy in places that are risky isn't the best idea but when he decides to get you back for it you have no where to run.

Warnings: Female oral/receiving and quite filthy umm- yeah and it’s 2.6k words in total

I was sat at the back of Snape's classroom as i brushed my fingers across Draco's thigh causing him to straighten. My fingers were slowly dancing their way up when he grabbed at my hand from under the desk. "Stop it y/n," he mumbled through gritted teeth, on the verge of clearly moving his seat further away from me. The way his cheeks were flushing red made a small grin crawl across my face, especially when I knew the affect i had on him.

Snape had demonstrated the class on how to do a potions practical and now we were going to be doing our own with our partners. "I'll go get the stuff," i murmured with a grin as he slightly nodded. Placing the handful of ingredients onto the table, I by accidentally dropped one on purpose.

Bending down to pick it up, I made sure that Draco was able to see whatever was visible under my hiking skirt, teasing him with the sight of my clearly soaking panties. From the corner of my vision, I could see the way he gulped and tugged at his collar trying his hardest not to peek and get distracted.

helping him put the ingredients into the tiny cauldron, his hand quivered as he tried to maintain his patience. "You okay there?" I teased, leaning across the the counter, face inches away from his. "Never been better," he mumbled frustratedly.

—

"I'm so exhausted like honestly I could take a break right now," huffed Pansy as she plopped down next to Malfoy on the emerald green couch of the slytherin common room. "Snapes starting to get on my nerves, setting us exams every other day as if I don't have other things too do," groaned blaise, throwing his head back , slumping into his seat, his arms crossed against his chest.

I decided to go and meet Draco since today was a Saturday although he clearly mentioned that he was going to be studying with his other group of posse and he didn't want me near him but I could care less about what he wanted. Swinging the substantial doors of the common room open, i trotted towards the three of them, swiftly placing myself onto Draco's lap, my arms flung around his shoulder as Pansy rolled her eyes and blaise shook his head.

"Can you two get a room?" They chimed in unison. Draco shifted uncomfortably under me, slowly removing my hands of him pushing me away a little. "Not today y/n, we have to finish this assignment off and your only going to get in the way," he explained, in a certain demeanour.

Glancing at one another, Parkinson and Zabini got up and headed for the door. "Don't worry about it Draco we'll finish it off," she explained, a small giggle trailing her words as they both shut the door behind them leaving the two of us alone.

"Turning me down were you?" I raised a brow, my hands on my hips as my facial expressions turned serious. "Why- What are you going to do about it?" He answered back, a small grin crawling across his face. The clattering of my shoes became more audible as I seductively walked towards him. I started to softly lower myself down onto his lap, straddling him as my finger ran down his chest. "Things you won't imagine," I muttered, my glossy lips ghosting against his. "Do you really think it's a good idea too disobey the slytherin princess?" The tone of my voice cocky as I purred into his ear.

Pulling away purposely, I smoothed out the fabric of my clothes, heading for the door while I gave him one last glance, my tongue swiping across the top of my teeth.

—

"What's the occasion?" Questioned Draco as he drummed his fingers impatiently on the table in the great hall. Purposely ignoring him, I began speaking flirtatiously to Blaise Zabini, a small grin smearing across his face as I bit my lower lip. Today I had curled my hair and applied some makeup to slightly enhance my features. Since today was a Saturday, that meant I didn't have to wear my uniform so I ended up wearing a plaid, mini skirt paired with a green crop top and last but not least, styled with some doc martens.

Malfoy sat there staring down at his plate, stealing a few glances towards me as i twirled a loose strand around my finger while I openly flirted with one of his minions. "Zabini.. I was wondering if you'd maybe want to help me with my homework... only if you want too," the last of my words rolling of the tip of my tongue smoothly as my eyes diffused into a darker shade. "No- you don't need his help," interrupted Draco as he pulled on my arm dragging me out of the great hall.

Striding through the corridors, pulling me along with him he suddenly pinned me against the wall. "Do you have any idea about what your doing," he sneered, his eyes boring into my soul as a sheepish smirk appeared across my visage. "No.. not at all. Why?" My voice innocent as I played with his mind. "You think it's okay to be such a tease?" His words barely coming out of his mouth as he grinded his teeth together. "You think it's okay to walk around with that fucking tiny skirt and turn me on like that?" He spoke while he breathed down my neck. "I have no idea wh-what your talking about," my words tripping over one another as I attempted to put up my act.

His lips ghosted over mine as his fingers trailed down my body causing me to shudder. Sending me on the edge of breaking character, his thumb slightly pulled down on my lower lip, exposing my flesh as I almost started to melt underneath him. Since I couldnt let that happen, I hastily swapped positions so that he was now flipped under me. "Impatient are we?" I questioned teasingly while the tip of my finger traced the outline of his jaw, later waking off into the other direction, intentionally making sure I swayed my hips.

—

Deciding that it was for the best, I somehow ended up leaving Draco alone. No more teasing, no more nothing. He was beginning to get irritated with me and seeing him get infuriated was the last thing anyone wanted so I ended up backing out.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked while I lifted his arm so I could slip under him. He harshly pulled away from my grasp and neither did he reply. "Draco... I'm sorry," the last of my words becoming quiet as I backed away from him.

"I thought I told you that I hate being teased in public," the tone in his voice filled with anger as he got up from the couch, his back turned towards me. "I know but- its kind of fun seeing you all flushed," I responded before he cut me off. "Flushed? You tease me, you play with me and then you go after Blaise?" He groaned, turning his twisted face around as he stared at me in disbelief.

"Okay I'm sorry- I'll quit being such a tease. I won't do it next time," I huffed as he looked me up and down, a smirk spreading across his face. Leaning into my ear, his other hand snaked across my waist as he whispered gently causing me to flush. "There won't be a 'next time',"

—

The next day I went down to the great hall for some breakfast and sat myself down next to Goyle. "Can someone pass me the syrup?" My voice eager to devour the stack of pancakes in front of me until I saw Draco walking into the halls with his arm slung over Pansy Parkinson.

"What the hell?" I muttered under my breathe, as they took their seat opposite me. Aware that he was just trying to get me back, I ignored their presence and continued feasting on the delicious food that sat before me. Glancing up at him through my thick lashes, I could see the distorted look on his face as he furrowed his brows in confusion. He probably thought to himself 'why isn't she paying attention?'.

The whole day had passed by and I sat in 4th period besides Hermione Granger, slumping deeper into my seat the more she shot her hand up to answer the teachers questions. My gaze diverted onto the clock, watching it tick away. There were only 2 minutes left until class ended and I was particularly eager about 5th period mainly because it was Snape's class and Draco was my partner.

I wanted to see what type of show he was going to put up so I threw my head back against my chair waiting until the professor dismissed the class. Grabbing my stuff and walking down to Potions class, I sucked in a sharp breathe before entering and taking my seat beside Malfoy. Scooting myself away from him, I acted as if he was invisible and fixed my attention onto the lesson.

"Mad are you?" He whispered, moving his chair closer to me, a wide grin curling from the corner of his mouth. "Why would I be mad? I'm not your girlfriend anyways," I firedback uninterested. "What makes you say that?" The tone in his voice softer than before as he glanced at my side profile. "I mean aren't you with Pansy?" I spoke lifelessly as if this subject was the most dead thing ever. "Could say the same for you... aren't you with Zabini?" His voice sending me over the edge, my mouth breaking out into a small smile.

"You really do know how to get on my nerves don't you?" My nose scrunching up as I flicked my hair in his face. Suddenly, he placed his hand on my knee, pulling at it. "Draco- What are you doing?" I questioned as my breathing hitched. "payback," he replied as his eyes changed into aluminium grey while he looked up at me through his dense, long lashes, lifting a brow.

Pushing my skirt past my thighs, his long fingers, corded with blue veins, glided up the silky, smooth surface of my skin causing me to purse my lips tightly as I gripped onto the edge of the desk. Inch by inch, he gradually closed the distance between the tip of his fingers to My now pulsing cunt. The heat raised to my cheeks making me blush hard as he sensually dragged his finger up my fully clothed heat making me jolt out of my seat, panting slightly.

"Miss. Y/l/n your disturbing the class, please take your seat now," ordered Snape as I ran my hand over my hair in second hand embarrassment. "Right- I'm sorry," I apologised before wearily seating myself again, a tiny giggle being held back from Draco.

—

"What the HELL do you think you were doing back there? You could have got us both into trouble!" My voice raising at him. "Darling relax, your only being like this because I almost embarrassed you," he stated, a look of temptation appearing on him. Plopping myself onto my bed I crossed my arms. "Can't you just leave me alone like I did with you?" I argued as he stood leaning against the wall with a cocky smirk that soon vanished. "No. You should have known better and now you've got no where to run," he retorted, as he came closer towards me, his hair tousled and his tie hung loosely around his neck. "What makes you think you can get away with anything?" He asked as he crouched down, his face level with mine.

Deciding to be mature, I kept my mouth closed instead of fighting back because I full on knew things would get out of hand. "Can't give me an answer now can you?" He taunted his grin drooping as his facial expression transitioned into a look of perilous. Grabbing at my face, forcing me too look straight into his intimidating gaze he leaned into my ear whispering 'open your legs' before shoving me back.

He was fuming with anger and I knew there was nothing better than getting him exasperated, especially when he looked incredibly sexy and irresistible. “No, were already One On One,” I answered making him cock his brow. “Did you just disobey me? I said open. Your. Legs,” his voice coarse and rough. “Make me open them,” I replied innocently, as I closed my legs tight.

Pushing my knees apart, he hooked his arms into my legs pulling me closer to the edge of my bed, my skirt riding up. Propping up on my elbows, I batted my lashes as if I were to be the most holy and pure person ever. “You dare disobey me like that,” he sneered before brushing his fingers against my pulsating cunt causing me to shift under him. The way his arm pushed my small figure deep into the mattress as he placed his tongue onto my clothed heat made me whimper underneath. “Oh my mer-,” I struggled to say as his tongue teased the skin on the side of my heat making me ache.

Within seconds, he looped a finger onto my soaking, transparent panties, pulling them to the side to take a quick view of my now throbbing pink, pussy that practically wanted him all over me. Trying to wriggle out of his firm hold, he pushed me down even deeper, as I tried to shimmy my skirt down past my thighs until he shoved away my hand. “Keep it on,” he demanded.

Positioning his head in the place I needed him the most he again pulled my panties to the side, blowing cold air onto my throbbing clit making me squirm. Giving me a little grin, he devoured into my entrance, slowly and sensually pulling and lapping at my clit, sending me into a sudden state of euphoria. Adding his thumb in, he rubbed slow and delicate circles on my little bundle of never as he ran his tongue up and down my slit continuously before applying even more pressure to my nerve. “Draco I- please- I cant,” my voice begging him to stop as the feeling made me sensitive.

I could hear him growl ‘No’ deeply into my pussy, sending me over the edge, making me tug at his tousled blonde strands as he made out with my heat. Plunging two digits into my entrance without a warning, I let out a huge moan as he picked up the pace of his thrusting while he multitasked. “Draco oh god- I cant take it anymore,” my pleading voice breaking in between as my legs shook, trying to close around his head.

Almost on the edge of releasing, he withdrawed away from me, almost panting as he wiped at his mouth with the back of his hand. “Why did you stop?” I squeaked as I say upright. “That’s what you deserve,” he responded as he adjusted his tie his fingertips now running through his hair. Trying to shut my legs together, I squealed in desperation for the numb feeling to go away. “Draco- I cant walk, I’m sore as hell,” I whined as I threw my head back in pain.

“Learn how to walk yourself,” he riposted before heading his way out of the door.

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rizubaby · 3 years ago

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Hello! We talk some days ago, and I'm here to formally propose my request. (And have my notif)

Dilf Gundham, recently divorced with Queen Sonia, take you out for an wholesome evening. (But not too spicy, because he's too wholesome, unfortunately.)

Just saw your post about your exam, we cross fingers! (And if you have it or not. At least your Gonta is in progress :o )

Have a wonderful evening, mes hommages.

Coffee for two, please | Gundham Tanaka.

genre ; sfw oneshot.

tags ; gn!reader, dilf!gundham, age gap (gundham is in his 40's), first date, mentions of divorce/kids, flirting.

note ; ahh, thank you love! I absolutely love this concept, so I couldn't wait to start writing. I hope you enjoy it. ♡

It's a beautiful spring afternoon. The sun has barely begun setting, the sky turning a mix of blue, orange and yellow without a cloud in sight. You turn to look at your fancy looking wristwatch, a sweet birthday present from your parents. It's nearly 7:00 pm.

You had agreed to meet him here, standing in front of what looked like just an ordinary bookstore. The cardboard sign on the inside of the glass door read 'open', though it looked like it might as well be closed.

You were nervous, fidgeting with your fingers as you looked around the street. Gundham, the man with whom you had agreed to meet, was seemingly running late, as you were supposed to meet with him here around this time. You felt your phone in the pocket of your coat vibrate, picking it up to see who was calling you. It was him.

“Ah, y/n. I'm glad I could reach you. I am running a bit late, I was being held up at work. Where are you at this moment?”

You let out a soft sigh of relief, almost starting to worry he might not show. You turned to look at the sad and empty looking bookstore behind you and answered.

“I'm standing in front of that bookstore you asked me to meet you.”

“I see. Can I ask you to meet with me somewhere else? I would rather have accompanied you to walk there, but I'm afraid I won't be able to make it in time. If you walk all the way down the road and turn left, you will see a coffee house with a red sign. Will you be able to go there?”

You look to your left, the end of the road just a couple hundred meters away. You nod to yourself, agreeing to his proposition.

“Sure, I can do that. Will you be long...?” you ask, noticing the slight stutter and uncertainness in your own voice.

“I don't think so. I am making my way to the parking garage right now. I will meet you there in about fifteen minutes, is that alright?”

“Okay!” you reply, a tad bit too excited for your own liking. “I-I'll see you then.”

“Splendid! See you soon.”

You hang up, now noticing your face is feeling burning hot. Why are you blushing like that? See, he wasn't going to leave you hanging after all. He sounded so sweet on the phone, so gentle and caring and—

You shook your head, trying to keep yourself grounded. Putting your phone back in the pocket of your coat, you started to make your way down the street.

Everywhere you looked, there were small stores and cafés, people walking in and out, enjoying their evening. The light of the setting sun made everything look warm and welcoming, the sounds of people talking and cars driving by filling the street.

By the time you got to the café Gundham had mentioned, the sun was almost done setting, the air outside getting noticably colder without the warmth of the sunlight. You peered inside, curious as to what kind of place he had picked out for the two of you. It looked a little bit expensive, but cozy nonetheless.

You thought about staying outside to wait for him, but ultimately decided to go inside and wait for him there. He probably wouldn't mind. You took a seat by the glass window, taking off your coat and retrieving your smartphone from your pocket once more. You opened up your chat with him and wrote him a text to let him know you had arrived at the designated place.

“I'm waiting inside by the window. See you soon!”

As you had nothing better to do than wait, you started scrolling through your phone mindlessly. You needed something, anything to distract you from the thoughts of him occupying your mind. Your heart was racing in anticipation, still unable to comprehend the fact that you were going to meet with him here. No, not just meet— go on a date with him here.

The thought of it made your cheeks instantly burn up again, until you were snapped back to reality by a friendly looking waiter adressing you.

“Excuse me, would you like anything to drink?”

You turned towards the waiter and shook your head, telling him you were waiting for someone. The waiter nodded and left, leaving you alone with your thoughts once again. Looking out the window, the world outside quickly went dark as the sun had disappeared under the horizon. The light from all the restaurants, cafés and stores across the street made for a beautiful sight. Getting lost in the view, you gently placed your face in your hand and stared outside.

The glass door of the café suddenly opened, a tall, dark figure stepping inside. He was wearing a black suit and dark dress shoes with a dark grey overcoat. His hair was swept back, with visible grey hairs. Just as he approached your table, you snapped out of your daydream and immediately turned to the tall man standing before you.

It was Gundham.

“Hello, beautiful. Did I startle you?” he asked, smiling gently as his gaze met yours. His eyes were dark and intense, yet somehow very calm and loving.

“I hope I did not make you wait too long.”

He pointed at the seat across from you, rings decorating his strong and veiny hands.

“Mind if I take a seat?”

You were desperately searching for the right words, greeting him sheepishly. He was much taller than you somehow anticipated, and now that you saw him in person, you truly were at a loss for words.

“H-Hi, no, you didn't make me wait too long,” you chuckled nervously. “I just got here myself.”

“I see, that's good. My apologies for being so late, something came up at work and my ex-wife called, and I—”

He stopped himself, taking a deep breath and smiling awkwardly before continuing. “I'm sorry, I should not put that on you. I am here for you, after all. Tell me, how was your day?”

His words caught you by surprise, to say the least. Not only did you learn he had an ex-wife, but more importantly, he said he was here for you. Your face turned hot and you averted his gaze in an attempt to calm the butterflies fluttering around in your stomach.

“Ah, I... My day was fine. I'm— um, I'm glad you're here.”

Gundham's face lights up, a gentle grin forming on his handsome face. He's greying a little bit and he has some small wrinkles at the corners of his eyes, but it all adds to his charm. His face is neatly shaven, and he's wearing some nice silver jewelry and glasses to accentuate his greying hair. How the hell did you get to go on a date with someone like him?

He leans his body forward, resting his arms on the table to make your gaze meet his once more.

“Wonderful. Ah, shall we get some coffee? What would you like, sweetheart?”

That word alone was enough to make you turn around and lock eyes with him once again. You could tell your face was flushed red, utterly surprised by his sudden nickname for you. Sweetheart? Was this a dream?

You stutter a little while answering him, still processing what he just called you. You could tell he was enjoying your bashfulness, a grin forming on his lips. After you answered him, Gundham got up from his seat and walked over to the register to order. Once he came back and sat back down again, you understood that this was in fact not a dream. This was real.

Hesitant, but with curiosity taking over, you brought up the topic.

You tried your hardest not to stare, observing the older man sitting across from you from top to bottom. He was dressed nicely, as you'd expect from a CEO. He had taken off his dark blazer and neatly rolled up the sleeves of his blouse. Looking at his hands that were resting on the table, decorated with jewelry, you could make out a faint discoloration of where his wedding ring used to be.

“You said your ex-wife called you earlier, um, were you married for long?” you ask, hoping he wouldn't mind talking about it.

“We were married for 23 years. We were high school sweethearts, but two years ago we agreed that it wasn't going to work out. We share custody over our children, but they live with her most of the time.”

Children? You were shocked, but intrigued nonetheless. Somehow you didn't expect him to have kids, but as you had noticed, you didn't expect a lot of things about this man.

“You have children?”

“Yes, two. A boy and a girl. They are very sweet, they truly take after their mother.”

A gentle smile appears on his face as he talks about them, telling you about their names and ages, what they're like, and so on. You listen to him in adoration and though his intimidating exterior may have you think otherwise, you can definitely see he is a very loving father at heart.

Once the conversion picks up, all your nervousness seems to wash away. He's very easy to talk to, and there's lots of things you can converse about. It's just like through text, though it's so much more enjoyable face-to-face.

The age gap is not a concern to either of you, if anything you like that he's a bit older and more experienced, and he likes your attractive youthfulness. In fact, he likes, no— loves everything about you. The way you dress, your sweet personality, your gentle voice, and those vibrant eyes that sparkle and are full of life. You seem to bring genuine happiness to him, something he hasn't experienced for a long time. His ever so extravagant laugh is proof of that, and he can truly be himself around you.

Whilst deep in conversation, one of the waiters serves you your drinks. You get a sugary latte, and Gundham has a double espresso set in front of him in a dainty porcelain cup. As you both take a sip of your hot coffees, Gundham reaches for your hand and places his hand on top of yours.

“Y/n, thank you for this wonderful evening. I truly enjoy your company, and I would love to do this again. What do you say?”

You start to blush heavily, his low and raspy voice giving you goosebumps all over. It all feels so surreal, yet here he his, practically holding your hand and telling you he's more than willing to take you out on a date for a second time, and maybe a third, and a fourth—

“I-I'd like that, Gundham. I'm really enjoying this, too.”

He smirks, noticing that his words and his hand resting on top of yours is having a visible effect on you. He takes another sip of his espresso without once breaking the eye contact.

After some more talking, lighthearted flirting and a second round of coffee later, Gundham looks at his wristwatch while running his fingers through his greying hair.

“My my, time really flies. Shall we go?” he suggests, and you nod in agreement as you grab your belongings. Though you assumed you'd be parting ways after this, you'd soon find out Gundham had other plans in mind.

As you stand up to put on your coat, Gundham grabs you by your wrist from close behind you. You can practically hear his warm breathing against your neck, and the butterflies in your stomach start to flutter like crazy.

“Here, let me help you, sweetheart.”

He gently grabs hold of your coat, putting your coat on for you. Feeling his large hands ever so gently caress your skin makes your heart flutter, feeling like it would beat out of your chest at any given moment.

As soon as you're both ready to leave, Gundham walks up to the register and pays for your coffee. He opens the door for you and walks out after you, the street now completely gone dark except for the lanterns illuminating the sidewalk.

As you look into each other's eyes for a moment, Gundham leans down to meet you at eye level, his face only mere centimeters away from yours and his lips dangerously close.

“I really enjoyed your company tonight, y/n. Though I don't want it to be over so soon.” he whispers, his nose softly grazing against yours.

“Me neither.”

“Hm,“ he purrs,

“I could show you my apartment if you'd like.”

#danganroses.requests #sdr2 #gundham tanaka #gundham tanaka x reader #gundham x reader #sdr2 x reader #danganronpa imagines

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thebookreader12345 · 3 years ago

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750 Followers Celebration - Q&A

Thank you so much for supporting me through this journey! You guys don't know how much this means to me. Every single one of you is amazing.

Below the cut are my answers to the questions that you all submitted.

Q: Do you think Jay is going to become Sergeant this season? A: There has been a lot of debate over this question because of the past few seasons and all of the "Easter eggs", like the sergeant exam poster hanging in the background of the show. In my opinion, I do not believe Jay will become Sergeant. Yet. I think it won't be until the beginning of next season because, if this is a possible storyline, I would expect that the producers and writers would make the finale of season 9 about Voight stepping down/getting promoted, etc.

Q: Did Chicago Justice deserve more episodes? A: I'm sort of split with this question. I loved the fact that there was a big episode involving Kevin, and they always included people from Med, Fire, and PD in some of the episodes. However, the whole plot of the episodes was kind of slow because it wasn't like they were police officers and could go out and chase suspects and arrest people and what not. Their job was just to gather the evidence and then present it in court. I think for many, the show fell flat because there wasn't much action, and part of me does agree with that, but the whole idea of the show itself was kind of cool.

Q: What would make you stop watching each Chicago show? A: This is a tough question because I've only ever dropped one show that I can think of, and it was only because the plotline got really dumb. Maybe if some major characters died in each show I'd stop watching it? But then again, I love the One Chicago universe so much that I don't think even that would stop me from watching. So yeah. I really don't know.

Q: Do you believe in magic? A: As much as I would love for magic to be real, I don't believe it is. But I feel like everyone thinks that way. Cause lets be honest, Harry Potter and Disney make magic look so cool. However, we all know deep down somewhere that it's almost impossible for certain things to be real, and magic just so happens to be one of them.

Q: Are you superstitious? A: I'm not the most superstitious person out there, but I do somewhat follow a few superstitions. Whenever I find a penny on the ground with heads facing up, I pick it up because I believe I'll get good luck. Doing the whole "fingers crossed" thing is something I do a lot. I believe you shouldn't open an umbrella in the house or else you'll receive bad luck. Broken mirrors are bad omens. Those are the top 4 I believe in, but other than that, I'm not really too superstitious.

Q: Is your perception of yourself similar or the same to how others perceive you? A: I mean, I would hope so. I appreciate my level of smarts, and whenever my friends acknowledge them or compliment me on them it makes my day. However, with that, people think that I'm always only doing things to boost my intelligence. For example, I love to read. So whenever I say that I didn't do much over the weekend, people always assume that I read a bunch, when I really didn't. Or that I always study for tests or do homework like a week before it's do. That is not the case. But for the most part, I believe my perception of myself is the same as how other people perceive me.

Q: Who is your favorite couple on each One Chicago show? A: Okay, so for Med, there aren't really any couples at the moment besides Maggie and Ben, whom I love but they aren't my favorite, so I'm gonna pick a past couple. When I first started Med, Manstead was my prime ship, so I'll choose them. Will had been pining after Natalie for so long so I was glad when they finally got together. For Fire, it's gotta be Kelly and Stella. They were literally made for each other, and they support each other with everything. Also, they are so cute together and all of Firehouse 51 ships them as well! And for PD, while I do love Burzek, Upstead is my favorite ship at the moment. I've seen the connection between Hailey and Jay since season 5. You don't understand how angry I was in season 7 when Hailey was so close to confessing her feelings. So season 8 made me very happy when Jay and Hailey finally got together.

Q: Jay and Lindsey or Jay and Hailey? A: I respect everyone's opinions on this matter, so hopefully you all respect mine. I thought that Erin was almost toxic in a way for Jay. She continuously broke his heart when all he wanted to do was help him. But what really does it for me is that she left Chicago without telling him goodbye. Hailey, on the other hand, has pushed Jay to seek out help when he needed it, like when she recommended he take seeing a therapist seriously to help with his PTSD, and she is always there for him, no matter what. That's why I believe Hailey and Jay are the better pairing.

Q: Which character death got to you the most? A: There have been too many sad deaths in the One Chicago world. But if I had to pick one, I've gotta go with Otis on Chicago Fire. Otis was always one of my favorite characters, even way back when I watched Fire with my dad when it was first coming out. He was witty and funny, and his friendship with Cruz was everything. So, when I watched the episode where he died, I was full on balling. I had to pause the episode for 10 minutes because I couldn't stop.

Q: Who is your favorite character on each show and why? A: I'm gonna do favorite male and female character because I've got too many favorites from each show. On Med, my favorites are Will and Natalie. Will has been my favorite since day one, and I like that he will go out of his way to help patients, even if it means he could get in serious trouble. Natalie, even though she's not in the show, always pushes for the best of care for her patients, and whenever she dealt with kids it was always the sweetest thing. On Fire, I like Kelly and Sylvie. Kelly is so headstrong and driven, and he will do anything to protect the other members of Squad 3. Sylvie is such a hard worker and you can tell she is passionate about her job. I feel so bad that she's had to go through so many partners. On PD I love Jay and Hailey. Jay has not always been my favorite male character. Back when I watched the show for the first time, I adored Adam. However, I love that Jay has such good morals and is always pushing to do the right thing even when Voight disagreed. Now, it took a few episodes for me to warm up to Hailey, but after seeing her be so badass, it was hard not to like her.

Q: Where do you get inspiration for your stories?/How do you get inspiration when there's not a request? A: This question is always hard to answer because I really don't know. Most of the time I'm fulfilling requests sent in by you guys and I just write what comes to the top of my mind. If there are requests that are not requested and I come up with them on my own, chances are I saw the plot somewhere else, like in a book or show or movie, and I just tweaked it a bit to fit the One Chicago universe. Either that happens, or while I'm trying to fall asleep, I make up random scenarios in my head, and if I find one that I really like, I'll make a note of it on my phone so I don't forget it, and then I'll write about it.

Q: Do you think Brett and Casey are endgame? Why or why not? A: I'm gonna go with yes on this one. Now, Brettsey is not one of my top ships in the universe. However, they are cute together, and I've been expecting them to get together for a while. The two of them, even when Gabby was around, had a great relationship and always cared for each other. Plus, Matt jumped out of a firetruck to go help Sylvie when the ambulance flipped. He was willing to risk an injury just to make sure she was okay. And now that they are officially together in Chicago Fire, you can see that they really love and care for each other.

Q: What inspired you to start writing? A: I always seem to get this question whenever I do a q&a, but that's okay because I don't mind talking about it. I first got into stuff like this as a reader. Basically, I went on to Wattpad and Tumblr to read other people's stories. I had no intention of creating my own. And then, one day, I started imagining myself in some of the fandoms I was apart of, and I thought, "If I'm imagining myself in these fandoms, chances are others are too," and I began creating stories that followed the plots of movies and shows exactly, just adding Y/n in it. However, that got tiring after a while because I wasn't able to have much freedom because I was following a set script, and that's when I remembered I had a Tumblr account I never used. So, I revamped my account just a little bit and started posting story ideas I had that I couldn't post on Wattpad because either they didn't fit with the stories or they were for someone I didn't write for on Wattpad. And now, here we are. For anyone interested, I've posted this before but I'll post it again, my Wattpad handle is @Writer_Reader05.

Q: Jay or Will Halstead? A: I'm sorry, but I really can't choose between the two of them. I love them both so much. Will and Jay are two of my favorite characters in the whole One Chicago universe. While they do have some qualities that I'm not the fondest of, at the end of the day, I adore the both of them, and I could never choose between them.

Q: Who would you rather date: Jay or Will Halstead? A: Why do you guys do this to me? I love them both so much! But, if I have to choose, I'm gonna pick Jay. The only reason is because I like the characters in PD more than Med, so if I'm dating Jay, chances are I'm friends with Hailey and Adam and all of Intelligence. Will is just as awesome as Jay though and I feel like sometimes people sleep on that.

Q: Which of the requested fics you’ve written is your favorite? A: I think I'm gonna have to go with a Jay Halstead x reader I wrote titled Two Becomes Three. Something about the plot just makes me smile. And to think of Jay being a father......So yeah, while I have so many amazing requested fics thanks to you all, that one has to be one of my favorites.

Q: What’s your favorite series you’ve written so far? A: I love all of the series I have written. Something about creating a whole story that's more than just one part is always fun. If I have to pick one series, I'm gonna pick On the Loose. It was the first series I wrote on Tumblr and the plot of it is something I'm really proud of. However, From the Big Apple to the Windy City, Identity Loss, and Difference of Opinion are all amazing! The first two are finished series and the last one still has a few chapters left to go. Go check them out if you haven't already.

Q: What's your favorite imagine you've come up with and why? A: I don't have a lot of fics that are solely my ideas. Most of my stories have plots that were sent in by you all. However, if I had to pick a favorite out of my stories, it'd be Back Home for Christmas, a Halstead Sister fic I released when I was somewhat new to the platform. Something about writing sibling fics always makes me happy because I get to express the familial side to the characters.

Q: If you had to be roommates with 5 of your mutuals/fellow writers, who would you pick and why? A: I love all of my fellow writers/mutuals so much! I know how much work we put into whatever we post, and most of us are very active on this site. As for who I would pick to be my roommates, I'd choose @hereforhalstead @fighterkimburgess @halsteadlover @resanoona @sylviebrettsey because I feel like we'd all have great conversations, mainly over One Chicago. And every Wednesday night we'd all watch the episodes live together and experience them as a group and then freak out over what happened..........Now watch me fantasize about this all day.

Q: Do you listen to music when you write? A: It depends. On some days when I plan that I'm gonna write, then yes, I do put on some music. When there are days that I have a few minutes to spare, I don't put on music just because I'm only writing for a few minutes and I don't want to waste time. But mostly when I'm writing I do play music in the background.

Q: Do you know how your fics/stories end before you finish writing it? A: This is a really interesting question. The answer is no, I do not know how I'm gonna end a fic before I finish writing it. The only story I had a set ending for was my series On the Loose, but that one wasn't even fully planned out until I got a chapter or two in. Obviously, if I get a request that includes a set ending, like two characters get together or something like that, then I know what the ending will be. Otherwise, I have no clue.

Q: Have you ever met someone who had a very similar personality to your own? Did you get along? A: You know, I can't say that I have. Everyone is different in their own way, and that's what makes us all unique. I would imagine if I did meet someone with a similar personality we'd get along because we'd basically be a carbon copy of each other, but who knows. Maybe our similar personalities would cause us to clash.

Q: Do you hold yourself to higher standards than you hold others? A: Not really. I know myself more than anyone else so I know what my limits are and when I've reached them. With people, on the other hand, I always feel like they can be doing more with themselves and their lives. So I do not hold myself to higher standards than others.

Thank you to all of you who sent in questions! I never thought I'd reach 750 followers on this platform. The only reason I have is all thanks to you wonderful people out there!

@winterberryfox @maximeevansblog @scarletsoldierrr @i-like-sparkly-things @dreamingmanip @soph0864 @ryliegh8 @lorenakaspersen @wanniiieeee @nevertoofarfromivar @securityfriendly-jay @pinkbay-love @stephie123

#one chicago #q&a time #q&a session #question and answer #750 followers

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h0tch-r0cket · 3 years ago

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Infatuation (18+) {a.h.} : chapter 7

summary: you needed a job. aaron hotchner needed a babysitter. the rest was inevitable.

word count: 4.2K

warnings: explicit language, mentions of cigarettes

table of contents

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

You would have been lying to yourself if you tried to deny the fact that for the rest of the night and into the early morning you had the biggest grin on your face, thinking about going to Aaron's lecture the next day.

Aaron Hotchner's lecture.

The professor Aaron Hotchner's lecture.

Your boss, Aaron Hotchner's lecture.

You weren't sure what you were expecting when he called out your name the night prior as you were about to pull away from his house. You figured maybe he was going to tell you something with Jack, maybe tell you that he was changing your pay day, or say something else that came into his head about the book. You most definitely weren't expecting him to invite you to his lecture and for the thought of attending to keep you up in anticipation for the majority of the night.

As you got ready for Aaron to come pick you up, your stomach was doing somersaults in anticipation. You wished that Esmé was around to calm your nerves but since she was doing an overnight at the ER again, you probably wouldn't see her until the next day when she was all rested up.

After going through what felt like a million different outfits, you settled on wearing a tan blazer with a white undershirt and a pair of black slacks. You figured since you were going to the university with Aaron that you had to have some degree of a professional looking outfit on.

You sat on the edge of your bed, putting on a pair of heels when you heard your phone vibrate on your nightstand. You grabbed it quickly and felt your nerves going haywire when you realized that all of this was actually happening. That Aaron did actually invite you to watch his lecture and offer to drive you.

You glanced at the message that you received from him and the smile that refused to leave your face only grew a bit wider at his words.

Aaron Hotchner

-Good morning, Y/N. Should be over to your place in about 10 minutes.

With nimble fingers, you responded back to him, letting him know that you would be all set to go when he got there.

You no sooner finished getting ready, doing your hair and putting on a little bit of makeup, when you heard the familiar sound of his car alarm go off.

The adrenaline rushed through your veins as you started to gather your things. You took a quick glance around your apartment to make sure you weren't missing anything when firm knocks sounded on your door.

Here we go, you thought as you unlocked the door to reveal Aaron waiting patiently for you.

He was wearing a black button up and pants to match, your eyes quickly glancing to where he had the top button of the shirt undone and the sleeves rolled up to his elbows exposing his slightly toned arms. You were almost positive the man couldn't have gotten anymore attractive to you but yet here he was in the entrance of your apartment, proving you wrong.

A small smile fell across his lips as he, too, was taking a moment to look at you. He didn't know how each time he saw you, you looked effortlessly stunning.

"Morning," he said, breaking the bit of silence that was between the two of you.

"How are you?" you asked as you stepped outside your apartment, turning around to lock up.

"I'm doing alright." He stood behind you as you locked the door, his presence and close proximity sending a shiver down your body. When you turned back in his direction, his eyes were already searching for yours. "Ready to go?"

You nodded your head and followed behind him as he led you to his car. He opened the passenger door for you and gestured for you to get in. You said a quiet thank you, adjusting yourself in the seat as he shut the door and went around the front of the car to the drivers side.

His car had the faintest smell of the lingering cigarettes that was overpowered by his cologne when he got into it. He settled in his seat, turning the radio on low. He turned his head towards you and glanced at his watch. "I have some time to kill before I have to be in my first class. Do you want to go grab a cup of coffee?"

"That would be great. I could definitely use some," you said with a smile. He nodded his head and started the car.

He turned his head to back out of the parking spot, placing one of his hands on the back of your seat to get some leverage. You couldn't help but watch him, completely entranced with the way that his arm was a bit flexed from the grip of your seat, the veins in his arms becoming more prominent.

"I know a good place on the way to my job. I think you'll like it," he told you, pulling you out of your daze.

You could only muster a small sounds good as he began to drive to the coffee shop, still thinking about the way he gripped onto your seat.

It definitely should not have turned you on as much as it did but there you were at nearly 8 in morning, already mesmerized by Aaron Hotchner.

As Aaron drove, the gentle hum of the radio filled the air.

"So what's your lecture on today?" you asked, trying to see whether or not you knew what Aaron was going to be discussing for the day.

"I was going to talk about Pandora's Box, but I think I'm leaning towards talking about Zeus and some of the myths that involve him since there's so many," he explained as he pulled into the parking lot of the coffee shop.

"Do you have a favorite myth to teach?" You saw a contemplating look on his face as he thought about as he exited the car. You got out too, waiting for his response, as the two of you walked side by side towards the entrance of the shop.

"I do like teaching about the Minotaur and the Labyrinth," he said as he held the door open for you. "But I don't know if that one is my favorite, you know?"

A woman behind the counter greeted the two of you as you stepped forward to offer. "What can I get for you folks today?" she asked.

"I'll take a black coffee, large," Aaron said.

The woman turned her attention towards you and waited for your order. You ordered your usual coffee blend and went to grab your wallet from your purse.

Aaron's hand stopped yours, pushing down the wallet back into your purse. "I got it." He handed the woman the money for the two coffees before you could even protest.

"Thank you but you didn't have to do that," you said as you stood in the area to wait for your drinks.

Aaron stood next to you, your arms brushing together. "I know. I wanted to," he said with a smirk as he looked down at you.

You could have melted from the way he looked at you. Like you were the only person in the room. The only person that he cared about at that moment.

The woman called out Aaron's name and he grabbed the drinks, passing you yours. He took a sip of his coffee as he walked back towards the entrance, opening the door for you yet again as you followed suit.

"So what do you think? Good coffee or what?" Aaron asked as you got back into his car.

It was a pretty damn good cup of coffee. You took a sip and nodded as he started to drive towards the university. "Mhm. Hopefully it'll wake me up a bit," you laughed.

———

"Alright everybody. I hope you all have been keeping up with the readings because as you know, you have your next exam this Friday," Aaron said as he walked in front of the room of students.

You were sitting in the middle of the auditorium, off center from where Aaron was teaching.

Seeing Aaron teach was such a sight to behold, you weren't sure how you would be able to keep your composure. Watching him, completely capturing the attention of the students, the way he talked and presented himself practically screamed dominance in the given situation and the way he was so thorough, lived up to your hopes as to what you thought Aaron was like as a professor.

"So today, I figured we could introduce one of the major players in Greek Mythology," Aaron continued. He grabbed the Expo marker, scribbling down the word Zeus on the whiteboard. He closed the marker and turned his attention back to his students.

You watched as he crossed his arms across his chest, pacing slowly in front of the room. "We've already discussed how Hades is Zeus' brother. But going further into who he is, does anyone have any prior knowledge about him?" Aaron's eyes scanned the crowd, landing on yours for a few seconds, a brief smile showing on his face as he looked at you.

As much as he was trying to keep his head straight and proceed with the lesson, he found that hard to do with you sitting in the crowd. He couldn't help but look over in your direction, watching your face light up with excitement as he spoke. He tried not to look too long because he knew that he would have gotten stuck in a daze and completely lost his train of thought during the lecture.

A small part of him felt nervous to have you there. It wasn't because of the clear knowledge you had of the subject matter, but because of the idea that he didn't want to mess anything up. He was silently praying that the lecture went off without a hitch and that when he finally spoke to you about it afterwards that you actually enjoyed your time there and he didn't bore you half to death.

"He's, like, the god of the sky or something like that," a student answered his question. Aaron nodded and turned to the whiteboard again, writing down what the student said.

"Very good, Mr. McMillan. Glad to see we're actually paying attention to the content today," he said with a small smile as he leaned against the podium next to the board. He clasped his hands together on top of the podium as he was waiting for someone else to chime in with their thoughts.

"Zeus is a man-whore," a student from the back of the auditorium called out confidently.

Aaron laughed lightly, his eyes wide at the response of his student. "I mean, I guess that is one way to put it," he agreed. "It is true. Zeus did in fact have many lovers and many children. Even though he was married to Hera, he had many affairs. That's actually what we're going to talk about today. Or at least one of his many known affairs."

You sat in your seat, almost in awe at the passion you saw radiating from Aaron as he spoke. The way he talked about the subject matter, clearly emphasizing what was important, and even taking the time to make sure his students were able to take thorough notes.

But the pesky little thing you had for Aaron was acting up, causing you to focus on different details rather than the lecture.

You focused in on the way the black button up was snug against his torso, making you wonder what he was hiding underneath it. As he continued to speak, your eyes became fixated on his arms as they flexed when he gestured with them through his speaking. Even as he was writing things down on the whiteboard, you focused on his grip of the marker, like he was holding onto it as a lifeline.

He, in fact, was gripping the marker with a firm grasp because of his nerves. He wasn't sure if he was just in his head because of the added pressure, but he was almost positive that almost every time he looked at you, you were focusing on some part of him as he taught. He was hoping that he wasn't imagining it. He was hoping that if you were looking at him like the way he thought, that you were going through the same conflict that he was.

That you wanted him just as much as he wanted you.

"The first tale of Zeus we'll discuss is of Zeus and Io. Io was a mortal woman, the princess of Argos. Zeus fell in love with her and covered the Earth with clouds as a way to try to hide his relationship from Hera," Aaron explained. He propped himself up on the edge of his desk, giving the students a moment to catch up on their notes.

"Of course, Hera was a smart woman. Not to mention a jealous woman. She knew what Zeus was up to. So she came down from Mount Olympus to try to catch Zeus cheating. However, Zeus was deceptive. Anyone have any ideas as to what he may have done?" He glanced around the room again, as did you, trying to see if anyone had some sort of guess.

"Ms. Y/L/N. You're pretty well-versed in mythology aren't you? Care to tell the class what happened?" Aaron said, a smirk growing across his face as he looked at you. He peered over the heads of his students from where he was sitting atop of his desk to maintain his gaze.

You thought you were hearing things when he called out your last name. But when you saw he was looking at you, you realized quickly that he actually was testing you.

Almost like how you did with him when the two of you discussed the book only the night prior.

You sat up straighter in your seat, feeling everyone's eyes landing on you as they awaited your answer.

"Well, Professor Hotchner," you started, hoping that the way you said his name would have an effect on him, the way it rolled off your tongue so effortlessly with charm. You saw Aaron's mouth drop open a quick second as if he were stunned at the way you addressed him, but he cleared his throat, staring at you with furrowed brows as you began to answer. "Zeus turned Io into a white heifer. It was his way of disguising Io so that Hera wouldn't see her. And when Hera wanted the cow as a gift, Zeus had to give it to her so she wouldn't be suspicious."

Aaron nodded his head in approval, yet again impressed by you. He was becoming more and more enamored with you each and every moment that you spent together, and he wasn't sure how much longer he could keep his feelings to himself. How much longer he could go without your touch, without being able to tell you how he loved your smile, without holding you in his arms at night to be the first thing that he wakes up to.

He was growing tired of listening to the words of the angel on his shoulder.

He was going to tell you all of these things and word them better. But for now, the words that he was able to compose in his head would have to do as he continued on with the lecture.

"Very good. Excellent, Ms. Y/L/N. Zeus knew that he couldn't resist Io. He had to have her. He would do anything in his power to be able to be with her." Aaron hopped off his desk and started to pace around the room again. He stopped in front of the section that you were sitting in, crossing his arms over his chest as he looked up at you. He sent you a small smile and you saw the way that his face softened for a second as he continued to look at you.

"He was completely and utterly infatuated with her," he said, his voice quiet as he continued to look at you. "And he knew it was wrong but he didn't care. For Chrissakes," he said as he threw his hands up in the air as he turned away from you, "The worst part of it all, in my opinion, was that he didn't care what others thought." He chuckled lightly as he walked, shaking his head in disbelief.

You felt your breath hitch in your throat as you watched him.

He stood behind his desk and leaned on it, looking down at the scattered papers in front of him. "He didn't care what happened as long as he got to be with Io." He lifted his head and without hesitation, he looked at you again.

You couldn't help but feel the words he was saying ripple through your entire body.

And then all too quickly, the emotions that you tried to push deep down whenever you were with Aaron began to make an appearance.

The excitement and attraction that you felt from Aaron's general presence, now swarming through your entire body as you realized that maybe he felt the same way. You took his words as a silent plea of him admitting his feelings.

But of course, you didn't want to take anything for granted. As you shifted in your seat, you were determined to figure out what the hell just happened and why it felt as though the stars were finally aligned and you could get what you wanted.

And you wanted Aaron Hotchner more than you wanted any man before.

Aaron was never one to completely ignore common sense and succumb to his desires. But in that moment, he dove head first into the situation, hoping that you picked up on his intentions through the subliminal message of the lecture.

He cleared his throat, regaining whatever capacity of a clear head that he had left to wrap up his lecture. "Hera arranged for Argus, the giant, to watch over Io to prevent Zeus from seeing her. Of course, that wouldn't sit well with the god of the sky so he instructed Hermes to go retrieve his beloved from the giant. Hermes was successful in setting Io free but the story goes that Hera sent the mother of all gadflies after her to continuously sting her." Aaron clapped his hands together loudly, grabbing the attention of the few students that seemed to be a bit distracted.

"That's all I have for you guys today. Remember, my office hours are canceled for the day. I'll see you all next class."

The room quickly emptied itself of its students, leaving you and Aaron in the auditorium. You gathered your things, still trying to process and decode whatever it was that just happened in the lecture.

Aaron gathered his papers together in his satchel and glanced up at you as you walked down to his desk. "So, what did you think?" he asked, a hopeful look on his face.

You so desperately wished to ask him if what he said about the myth was about him. If he really felt that way about you. But for the time being, you held your tongue and decided to ask him when you got in the car when you had some proper time to think about what it was that you wanted to say exactly.

"It was really great. I enjoyed it. Well, except the part where you called me out of the crowd," you teased, nudging him in the arm softly as the two of you started to walk back out of the building to his car.

"I think it was only fair. You gave me a test so I figured one question in return makes us about even," he said cockily.

You scoffed as you walked, kicking a pebble at your feet. You watched the pebble bounce on the sidewalk, landing a few feet in front of Aaron's stride. "I gave you time to study," you retorted.

"Mine was a pop quiz then," he laughed. He looked down at the sidewalk, kicking the pebble back in your direction. You felt yourself smile at the gesture, especially since it was a bit of a habit that you picked up from the time that you spent with Jack.

The two of you settled into the car, the buildup of the obvious tension from the day lingering in the air.

You turned to look at Aaron to find him already looking at you.

"Look, Y/N-"

"Look, Aaron-"

The two of you said the words at the same time, a small laugh coming from both of you. Aaron waved his hands towards you as his way of telling you to go first.

"You can go first," you told him with a light laugh. You figured it would give you more time to think of what you wanted to say to him anyway.

"Alright." He exhaled deeply and shifted in the driver's seat to fully look at you. "Y/N, I just wanted to say thank you for coming today. It meant a lot to me that you did." You nodded, a small smile curling up at the edge of your lips. Aaron's eyes darted down to your lips before they returned to yours as he continued to talk. "I also just wanted to tell you that I really appreciate everything that you have done for Jack and I."

He reached his hand forward, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear. You felt like you were in a haze. His touch was driving you insane. But when he rested his hand on your cheek, rubbing small circles on it with his thumb as his eyes were full of admiration for you, only then did your skin feel like it was being ignited by his touch.

You thought you were imagining things. You thought you were going crazy as the gap between you and Aaron closed, as he brought his head closer to yours while moving your head forward at the same time.

"Y/N, you're something else," he whispered, his face only inches away from yours. "And you deserve the world."

Your heart was beating out of your chest as you felt the inches growing less and less between the two of you. You placed your hand on top of his, wrapping your fingers around his.

"Y/N," he muttered, as his nose brushed against yours while he tilted his head to get to your lips.

You heard your heart pounding in your ears. You couldn't believe that it was happening. This only showed you that he did indeed feel the same way. He wanted you just as much as you wanted him.

Everything was moving in slow motion. You felt as though your lips would never find his.

Only mere inches apart.

Inches.

An inch.

Aaron's phone blared in his pocket, taking over the moment. He let out an aggravated sigh as he pressed his forehead against yours for a moment, his eyes shut in disappointment. "Fuck," he muttered, almost so quietly you weren't positive if that was what he said. He removed his hand from your cheek, sitting back up in his seat as his hands dug in his pocket for his phone. He read the caller ID and pinched the bridge of his nose. "It's Jack's school," he said as he held the phone up to his ear. "Aaron Hotchner."

Your brain felt like mush. You almost kissed Aaron and he was the one to initiate it all. You could still feel his hand on your cheek and the adrenaline running through your body as the gap slowly closed between the two of you. You sat back in your seat, pressing your head against the headrest as you only heard incoherent mumbles from Aaron as he spoke on the phone.

You stared blankly out the window, trying to wrap your mind around what the fuck just happened.

Aaron's hand resting on your shoulder pulled you out of your trance as he looked at you with concern. "Y/N? Did you hear what I said? I have to go get Jack from school early. He got sick."

You couldn't speak. Couldn't think. You only managed to nod your head at him. He took his hand off your shoulder, putting the car in drive. "I'll drop you off at home. Don't worry about coming over today. I'll just cancel the rest of my lectures for the day to be with him."

You nodded again as you watched the buildings of the campus speed by your vision as he drove.

You had to talk to him about everything from that day.

From his words at the lecture to the way that he almost fucking kissed you, you weren't even sure where to begin.

All you knew for certain was that you would be thinking about where that kiss would have led you if you weren't interrupted.

------

author's note:

hello hello! another chapter for you all! and i'm not even sorry for how i ended it lol

i hope you're all prepared for the next few...the next one will make things a little...twisted??

see you soon!

-jordyn

#aaronhotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x you #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #cm #bau #hotch #hotch x you #hotch x y/n

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mypunkpansexualtwin · 3 years ago

Text

Here we come with day two of pegoryu week, and it's gonna be the last one I post on time. I'll still be trying, don't get me wrong, I'm just not the kind of person who can write a fic I'm happy with in one day.

Yet.

As always, bulk of the fic is under a cut, link is in the reblogs, and I will daydream of baking you cookies if you share it.

“I did warn you.”

“Not even an arcade, dude?”

“Not unless you wanna get on a train for forty minutes.”

“Ugh. Laaaaame.”

After nearly a month of planning, Ryuji was visiting his boyfriend for Golden Week. One whole month of bargaining with all of their parents, putting aside every last yen they could spare, studying their asses off to earn the trip, and, of course, long phone conversations that were probably about eighty percent “I miss you”s and “I love you”s and “I can’t wait to see you”s. With Akira’s help via video call study sessions, Ryuji even managed to get into the top thirty percent of the class in their latest exams; a new record for him that effectively guaranteed the visit. But they’d been so busy celebrating and planning getting him out to the country that they may have completely forgotten to figure out what they were actually going to do when he got there. So now they were on the Kurusus’ living room couch, Akira cross-legged on one end and Ryuji stretched out across the rest with his head on his boyfriend’s lap, trying to scrape together a date idea.

“I’ll say it again. I warned you. Several times,” Akira repeated while he ran a hand through Ryuji’s hair. “There’s nothing to see here.” Ryuji caught Akira’s free hand, tangled their fingers together, and kissed the back of his hand.

“Yeah there is. You’re here, so I say it’s worth it.” Ryuji grinned as his boyfriend turned pink at the tips of his ears and wrinkled his nose.

“Sap,” Akira grumbled like there wasn’t a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. Like they both didn’t know full well how much he liked hearing how happy Ryuji was that they were together, in every sense of the word.

“You love me,” Ryuji said, his grin widening just a little further. Akira’s expression melted into something almost embarrassingly soft as he went back to playing with his boyfriend’s hair. He curled and combed his fingers gently through the short strands, and huffed out a quiet laugh as Ryuji went boneless when he grazed his nails over his scalp.

“Yeah. I really do,” Akira sighed happily and got another kiss pressed to his knuckles. “You’re kind of my hero, you know.” It was something he’d tried to make a habit of telling his boyfriend, even before they were dating. Ryuji still sputtered and objected like it was his first time hearing it.

“You-- I-- that ain’t…” He sat up and shoved a pillow into Akira’s face with a groan. “Now who’s the sap?”

Akira draped himself across Ryuji’s shoulders and planted a kiss on the side of his neck, then smiled against his skin at the shiver that got. “You just have that effect on me, sunshine.” Ryuji grunted in response. “You like it.” Another grunt. Akira blew a puff of air at the back of Ryuji’s ear and laughed when he got swatted away. “Don’t pout. You were right, a date sounds nice. But you gotta help me figure it out.”

His boyfriend sprawled back out on the couch after pouting for a few more seconds, then looked up at him with those big brown eyes he’d been a sucker for since day one.

“Aight, what kind of food you got around here?” Akira could have been exasperated at his boyfriend’s predictability, but a dinner date was more feasible than a movie date, and a lot more pleasant than a gym date. He may have loved Ryuji Sakamoto with all his heart, but he didn’t plan on running again on the regular unless it was for his damn life.

“There’s only like ten places total around here. We’ve already visited three, two of them won’t serve me because the owners don’t like me anymore--”

Ryuji’s head jerked up at that, knocking Akira’s hand free. It was ridiculous how cute the guy was when he was offended. “What?! Why the hell not?”

Akira shrugged and went back to petting Ryuji’s hair in an attempt to soothe him. “Didn’t exactly bother to ask, but probably my record. Cleared of charges or not, my reputation mutated while I was gone and I haven’t really been able to fix it.” Not that he’d tried very hard when he didn’t plan on staying for even a second longer than necessary.

The frown that wrinkled Ryuji’s features was almost comical, but he probably wouldn’t appreciate being laughed at while he was already agitated. Especially when it was on Akira’s behalf. “Ugh, this town sucks, can’t wait to get you out of here. Wait, only probably your record? Why else would they dislike you?”

Akira huffed out another laugh, wry and joyless this time. “My uncle’s a pretty conservative guy, I heard he didn’t react well when he found out I was dating some guy from the city.” Quite literally heard it; he’d been getting ready to visit his cousin and could hear the old man shouting inside the house from the sidewalk. He’d opted to text Yuuta to meet up somewhere well away from their house instead when that happened. And, naturally, the news had mysteriously spread to the rest of town by the end of that week.

Ryuji sat bolt upright and twisted back around to face Akira with a scowl. “Your own effin’ family won’t serve you? What the hell?!” His expression was thunderous, made worse by the doomcloud over his head when he asked. Ryuji almost never got pulled into fights these days and was very proud of that fact--they both were--but Akira was certain that he was ready to deck the old man on sight on his behalf. He’d never encourage it, but the thought still made something in his chest swell a little.

“Just my uncle when I try to sit in. If it’s my aunt or my cousin taking delivery calls, they’ll still take the order. Plus a discount and extra desserts, if Yuuta’s the one who answers.” Akira shrugged, then tugged at Ryuji’s shirt to coax him into laying back down in his lap. He did, albeit begrudgingly, and Akira went back to running his hands soothingly through that remarkably soft shock of bright blond hair. “Anyways, the other five restaurants in town are fast food that you could get back home. So…” He trailed off and watched Ryuji’s scowl soften into an annoyed frown.

“Yeah, pass.” Ryuji closed his eyes, either to think or soak up Akira’s touch as he played with his hair, then cracked one eye open after a moment. “How ‘bout a picnic? You’re a pretty good cook and I bet we could find us a nice spot to just chill.”

That... was a pretty solid idea. Actually, that sounded perfect, and Akira knew exactly the spot for them to set up. He opened his mouth to agree, but was cut off by a low rumble of thunder outside. “...Maybe later this week? The weather should clear up before you have to go,” he said instead. Ryuji pouted up at the ceiling, or more likely up at the sky beyond it for ruining his brilliant plan. Then it was Akira’s turn to pout when Ryuji abruptly sat back up out of reach, but not for long.

The next thing he knew, he was being crowded up against the arm of the couch by one blond bombshell of an ex-track star. Ryuji was suddenly determined to pour himself into his boyfriend’s lap, all mischief and heat as he crawled across the couch towards Akira. He couldn’t think clearly while facing down that wicked grin curving across Ryuji’s face like Haru’s favorite battleaxe cleaving through the air. It wouldn’t be the first time they’d made out. It wouldn’t even be the first time Ryuji had taken the initiative and left Akira a flustered wreck when they did. But since it had been over a month since the last time he’d seen that look face to face, it was having more of an effect than usual, and Akira was left frantically trying to cling to his cool.

“I have an idea, babe.” Ryuji said lowly and Akira’s mouth went dry. Hands bracketed Akira’s hips on the couch as his boyfriend crept closer. “Y’wanna hear it?” Akira nodded and felt heat flare across his skin when he realized Ryuji was keeping that hooded, heated gaze fixed firmly on his lips. “Since your folks ain’t supposed to be back before tomorrow afternoon,” Ryuji’s tone was as light as his body was heavy as he straddled Akira and looped strong arms around his neck, “I was thinkin’ maybe… we could…” Akira was desperately trying to focus on the words being whispered into his ear over his boyfriend kissing his way up his neck and leaving his skin prickling in the wake of every touch.

“Y-yeah?” He couldn’t help the nervous flutter in his stomach. If Ryuji was implying what he thought he was implying... They hadn’t done… that... yet. Even with the house to themselves all day, they hadn’t actually talked about it, in part because Akira hadn’t even thought about it seriously yet. That nervous flutter hadn’t subsided and was starting to feel a little more like an anxious lurch.

Ryuji continued, oblivious to his boyfriend’s nerves with his face tucked against his neck. “We could maybe…” Akira’s hands flexed involuntarily around Ryuji’s hips. He didn’t dislike the idea, just-- His unsteady train of thought was thrown off again when soft lips brushed over his ear. “...watch One Piece together?” After a beat where Akira was left blinking stupidly for several seconds, Ryuji sat back on his legs with a grin that had gone from sultry to shit-eating on a dime. Oh. Okay, he could handle that. “I gotta get you caught up to me, plus I wanna see how much we can get through in one sitting.”

“...you’re truly a romantic for the ages, sunshine,” Akira responded flatly as his heart rate slowly returned to normal. He was teasing back now, because honestly that idea sounded just as good as the picnic, with a lot less effort to set up.

“I know,” he answered confidently, but his smile slipped a little. “Is that a no? I just thought maybe I could buy us dinner from your shitty uncle, and we can cuddle while we take advantage of that big TV with the fancy sound system.” Ryuji gestured hopefully to the flatscreen behind them that was nearly as big as Akira’s bed back at Leblanc.

“Sounds good. Netflix and chill, it is,” Akira declared. When he caught the way Ryuji’s smile and shoulders tightened slightly, he added, “y’know, in the most literal sense.” It wasn’t as though he was happy to see Ryuji nervous, but when his boyfriend relaxed at the reassurance, he couldn’t help but feel relieved that the two of them were on the same page as far as that was concerned.

---

Aki hadn’t been kidding when he said his cousin would hook them up. There was probably double what they’d ordered plus desserts in the bags the guy handed off.

“So, you must be the boyfriend, huh? He talks about you a lot. Y’know, for him.” Yuuta asked as he leaned on the doorway. Ryuji just grinned, because yes, that was him, he was The Boyfriend. Akira’s boyfriend. Akira’s boyfriend. It’d been months and Ryuji still got all giddy about it like it was brand new. Yuuta interrupted his thoughts when he called out past Ryuji to where Akira was sitting and watching TV, “Man, talk about punching above your weight!” Ryuji blushed and opened his mouth to object before Akira could start bragging on how amazing Ryuji was.

Apparently Akira had other plans, because before he could, two sharp whistles rang out behind Ryuji and he reacted basically on instinct. It was the signal Akira had always used to mean duck or you’ll get hit in the Metaverse, and Ryuji’s knees buckled with almost no input from his brain. He had just enough time to worry if he’d spilled the food--thankfully he hadn’t--when one of the couch throw pillows whiffed past his head and nailed Yuuta in the face.

“ACK! The fuck, dude?! See if I give you free dessert again, jackass,” the guy yelled and hucked the pillow back--and missed, from the sound of Akira’s laughter. Ryuji straightened up with a grin as Yuuta turned to him. “How the hell did you two even do that?”

“We’re just cool like that, I guess.” Ryuji shrugged. No need to explain how many times he’d accidentally taken a Lucky Punch or whatever in the back of the head because he got signals mixed up. “Seriously though, thanks for hookin’ us up, dude.” He held up the food and then added a little more quietly, “and, uh, thanks for havin’ Aki’s back while he’s here. It’s easier to not worry if I know there’s at least someone here talkin’ to him besides that damn cat.” That got a snort of laughter out of the delivery guy.

“No problem? I’d say obviously, ‘cause he’s family, but… Well, I’m sure he told you. Our family kinda sucks sometimes.” He frowned, shook his head, then brightened back up. “Anyways, sweet of you to worry. He really did luck out when he found you, huh?” Yuuta said as he stepped back from the door.

Ryuji shook his head. “You got it backwards, man. I’m the lucky one.” He turned back to where his boyfriend was watching TV, now fully absorbed in the show even if he didn’t really look like it. Ryuji couldn’t help the contented sigh that escaped him; he had his boyfriend again and he was going all in on one of Ryuji’s favorite things just because it was one of Ryuji’s favorite things, and it looked like he was actually enjoying it, too. When he turned back, Yuuta was halfway to his scooter, still loaded down with bags of food.

“You really believe that, huh?” He called back. “You keep that attitude, Sakamoto. Even when he’s bein’ a menace, alright? ‘Cause he’s a menace, but he’s my menace, and I’ll serve you up as dumplings if you hurt him!” The scooter rumbled to life and Yuuta added over the noise of the motor, “And you tell him the same thing. I like ya, so he’s gonna be the next lunch special if he’s an asshole to you!”

Ryuji waved in acknowledgment as he sped off, then closed the door and dropped the bag of takeout next to Akira. They paused the episode long enough to sort through the food; a double order of dumplings, pork miso for Akira, spicy vegetable ramen for Ryuji, ginger pork with rice that he was pretty sure they didn’t order at all, and half a goddamn cheesecake for them to split. It was an impressive spread that Akira was already calculating how much was going to be crammed into the fridge at the end of the night.

“Well. Anything we don’t finish tonight can go with us on the picnic?” He suggested as he started on his soup and turned the show back on. They hadn’t made it very far in just yet, and definitely had an uphill battle ahead of them.

Ryuji nodded, mouth already full of noodles. “Shoundsh good to me, dude.” Akira made a face at him like he always did when he talked around a mouth full of food, and Ryuji washed it down with some of the broth. “Family recipe?”

Akira hummed a confirmation around his own food, but paused to actually finish his bite. “Yup. Not as good as the place you took me, but I could just be biased.” Ryuji could hear the smirk in his voice that always cropped up when he was thinking about saying something sappy. Ryuji cut him off before he could, though. Butterflies wouldn’t leave much room in his stomach for ramen.

“I was thinkin’ the same thing. The Ogikubo thing, not the bias thing. Didn’t wanna offend, though.” Ryuji said and took another sizable bite. Even mediocre ramen was still pretty good in his opinion.

Akira chuckled. “Nah. Actually, the ramen there’s always been a little lackluster. I could’ve offered some advice to improve it once I got back, but now? Fuck that guy.”

Ryuji tried not to choke on his food with the laugh that threatened to escape. Scalding, spicy broth shooting out of your nose kinda sucked, especially if you got a noodle along with it. That was an experience he wasn’t keen on repeating. He swallowed down his bite and rasped, “could always pass it on to your cousin. He seems pretty cool when he ain’t threatenin’ to cook us.”

“Ah, you got the shovel talk, then--wait, us?” Akira nodded, but then froze partway and whipped his head around to Ryuji, who nodded in return after clearing his throat.

“Mhm. Said he likes me, ‘n if you break my heart you’re gonna be a lunch special,” Ryuji grinned.

“Asshole. He knows I can’t stand most of what’s in the rotation.” Akira grumbled and pouted into his soup. “What’d he threaten you with?”

“Dumplings.”

Akira’s eyebrows disappeared up into his bangs at that. “Damn, I think he likes you better than me. Uncle’s place is famous for its dumplings,” he explained as he picked the last bit of pork out of his bowl.

“I’m… honored? So is all your family this weird, or is it just you two?” Ryuji asked around another mouthful of noodles. The broth was definitely missing something, but the vegetables were pretty damn good; still pretty crisp but not undercooked. Good flavor on their own, prolly locally grown, too. “Also, how is a place in the middle of nowhere famous for anything?”

“Hey, we still have several other towns nearby, and folks will come here specifically for those dumplings. So you should be honored.” Akira huffed as he popped one of said dumplings in Ryuji’s mouth. Shit, it was pretty killer. Leagues better than his ramen. And of course his boyfriend looked as smug as Morgana when he caught the look on Ryuji’s face. “As for the weirdness? No idea. Around here it’s just me and Yuuta, but I don’t really know much about the ones that don’t live here. Might be because we’re in the middle of nowhere, might be because the ones who live here make a habit of cutting off any undesirables.” Aki shrugged and leaned up against Ryuji. “Maybe I’ll see if I can find any of them when I leave. I dunno.”

Ryuji leaned right back into him and planted a kiss against Aki’s temple, earning himself a pleased little hum from his boyfriend that he felt more than heard. “I’ll be right there with you if you do. I always got your back, babe.” Akira finished his soup and curled up against his side, tucked under one arm. It was nice, even if it meant now Ryuji had to figure out how to eat his ramen one-handed. Eh, he’d figure it out, it’s not like there was much left in the bowl anyway. “So, uh, earlier. You seemed a little tense when I was teasin’ you? And not like usual. I didn’t, like, push too much, did I?”

Akira had suddenly gone very still under his arm. Not the best sign.

“No. But, uh don’t take this the wrong way or anything, I was definitely glad you just wanted to watch One Piece with me. For a second there, I thought you wanted to…” He buried his face against Ryuji’s shoulder. God, his boyfriend was stupidly cute when he got all shy. “...y-y’know. Anyways, I was relieved when you seemed just as nervous about it? Not to be an asshole, but I’m kinda glad it isn’t just me who isn’t ready.”

“Right.” Well, that was that question out of the way, but now he’d paved the way for a new one that’d been rattling around in his head for a while now. God, best case scenario, Akira was probably gonna laugh in his face. Him? Ryuji Sakamoto, of all people, not interested in that? “What if…” He hesitated and tried again. “Well, how long would you be okay with that?”

“What do you mean?” Akira tipped his head up to look Ryuji in the eye. That really didn’t help things, ‘cause even on a good day Ryuji tended to feel small when Akira looked at him like that.

“Like…” Ryuji took a deep breath and steeled himself. “WhatifI’mneverready?” His stomach clenched. There it was, he’d finally said it. Years of wondering if his friends were just exaggerating what they wanted to do with the girls in their class; months of internet research and arguing with himself even when it was the only answer that made sense and trying to backtrack or minimize it with ‘well maybe I’m only kinda like that, maybe I’m that demi thing, maybe I’ll find someone’ to try and soften the blow; a whole year of slowly coming to the realization that that just wasn’t something on the table for him, no matter how attractive Ann was or how close him and Akira got, he just wasn’t wired for wanting that kind of thing, even if he wanted the rest of the sappy, romantic couple shit for as long as he could get it, ideally the rest of his life. All of that had built up to one rushed confession that could make this trip out to the country really effin’ miserable when he still had four more days of crashing at his boyfriend’s place.

“Didn’t... quite catch that?” Akira said after a moment of trying to process what Ryuji had just blurted out. Goddammit. Of course he didn’t.

Ryuji took a deep breath and tried again. “What if… I’m never ready for that? Would that be a dealbreaker?” His heart was hammering as he forced the words out a little more slowly this time. And Akira already looked annoyed. Shit. Shit. He couldn’t look him in the eye and instead stared down at his feet, trying desperately to swallow the queasy feeling in his stomach that threatened to bounce his lunch back up onto the floor in front of him. Ryuji opened his mouth to backpedal, to assure him that if he really wanted to then Ryuji would try for him even if the idea was kind of completely terrifying--

“Of course not!” The sharpness of his tone was what registered first and Ryuji was already braced for a breakup when the words actually hit him. It wasn’t a dealbreaker. It was okay. They were okay. They were... actually okay?

“Wh-- forreal?” Ryuji’s voice cracked embarrassingly and Akira shifted against him, one hand coming up to his chin to make him look at him.

“I already told you, you’re my hero. You…” Akira opened and closed his mouth a few times, like he was looking for the right words and couldn’t find them. One hand cupped Ryuji’s jaw and ran a calloused thumb across his cheek, and Ryuji couldn’t help but press into the touch. “You’re everything to me. I could write books on all the things that make you amazing; your compassion, your kindness, your loyalty, your smile, all of it. So what if we never…” Akira blushed a little, but he seemed determined to power through the embarrassment. “So what if we never have sex? What do I care? I love you, Ryuji Sakamoto, I’m not giving up my sunshine, the best thing that ever happened to me, for anything.”

Ryuji swallowed hard around the lump forming in his throat and buried his face against Akira’s neck. Even away from Leblanc, he still smelled like coffee and curry, still smelled like home. Akira had called it home too, and had told him once that he made Boss’ recipes whenever he was homesick for the cafe, or his team, or… Or for Ryuji. Ryuji wanted to believe him so badly. “It’s easy to say that when you still ain’t ready for it, but--”

“I won’t change my mind,” he insisted so vehemently that no part of Ryuji could even think of an argument. Even the part of him that had been certain for months that even admitting he was asexual to himself would ruin everything. “It’s not like I can’t take care of things myself. And that just means more time for everything else.” Akira paused and pressed a kiss to Ryuji’s forehead. “More time to cook your favorite foods,” kiss, “more time to cuddle,” kiss, “more time to watch our favorite shows, all of it.” Akira dropped one last kiss on his temple and went back to running his fingers through Ryuji’s hair. Then he added, almost too quietly to hear, “for the rest of our lives if you’ll let me.” Let him? He’d fuckin’ beg him if he had to.

“Babe, you’re gonna make me cry,” Ryuji said thickly, as if they couldn’t both feel the wet spots forming on Akira’s shirt from where tears were already streaming down his face. Part of him was still scared he wasn’t going to be enough, and it probably always would be for one reason or another. But for now it was easy to relax into his boyfriend’s embrace and trust that he planned on sticking around a little longer.

Akira kept playing with Ryuji's hair the way he knew he loved and wrapped his other arm tightly around him. He pressed a few more kisses to the top of Ryuji’s head and then asked, “do you need me to stop?” Ryuji shook his head and got another kiss. “Alright. Take all the time you need, sunshine.”

“Thanks, babe.”

“We’re gonna need to restart the episode after, though.”

#persona 5 #pegoryu #pegoryu week 2021 #my writing #had the idea for ace ryuji halfway through this prompt and couldn't resist giving favorite characters the tenderness I have yet to find #so if you clown here I will physically fight you

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yarasun · 4 years ago

Text

La Douleur Exquise 2; l.jn

• Word Count: 11.8K

• Summary: For you so loved him deeply, but all he needed from you was to satisfy his venereal desires. Lee Jeno was the painful yet ethereal lust, while Na Jaemin was your salvation. To love Lee Jeno was to endure in agony, but what could you do when his own bestfriend made you feel what true love is?

• Author's Note: This is my second one shot under the "Heir / Heiress AU". This part will mention Na Jaemin a little more, but I assure you it still revolves and is associated with Jeno and the reader's relationship. Please do go back to part one before jumping to this. Special credits to the Kdrama "The Inheritors" where I got the business school idea from and also credits to the owner of the photo used as the cover. I hope you guys Lee Donghyuck's Illicit Desire, the first book of this series. Enjoy!

La Douleur Exquise 1

"How does it feel to have Jaemin's hands all over you? Were you that desperate for attention that you had to sashay Jaemin in front of me?" Jeno growled as he bit marks onto your skin. It's been a week since his message and you've been avoiding him as much as possible. Ignoring his phone calls, and keeping him on read, this enraged Jeno even more, he was restless and he managed to get ahold of you today. As you were passing by, he grabbed your arm and pulled you into an empty classroom. He pulled you closer towards him and you could feel the anger radiate from his body. But you couldn't understand why. Jeno had no rights, and according to him, there were no strings attached to this little relationship of yours.

"Jeno." You whimpered as he placed kisses all over your neck. It was rough and full of lust, but you loved it, you indulged in all the things Jeno did to you, for he was worth all that pain. Lee Jeno was worthy enough to shatter your already damaged heart. He could do anything to you and you would never complain, for Lee Jeno was the epitome of a collision between heaven and hell. He could destroy you with his words of rejection, yet he could patch those wounds by his wet kisses.

"Baby, you are mine. Only mine." He says and pulls away from you. His eyes scanned your features thoroughly. A playful smile crept up his lips and he touched your foreheads together, his eyes staring deeply into your dark ones. "Please stay baby. I need you." Jeno whispers and you hum in response. He didn't have to tell you twice. Despite the numerous tears that stained your pillow and the countless times you had to cover your mouth for your cries to be unheard, you'd still go back to Lee Jeno. Only Lee Jeno could hurt you this way, it was an agonizing desire that burned your soul, leaving it in ashes. Yet, it was still him you see yourself falling for over and over again.

Unaware of the certain someone that stared from afar, you shared yet another rough kiss with Jeno.

"We should get going Jeno. You've skipped too many classes this month." You said and Jeno groans. He hated when you acted strict with him, Jeno did not like being told what to do. He was reckless and unruly, not even Seo Yun nor his friends could suppress that part of him. Although he might not act that way as much as before, Lee Jeno still had his reputations of ruining events and properties. Last year's gala preparations were held back due to the big fight that happened between him and Sunwoo. It ended with Jeno getting a bruised lip, Sunwoo had to get a cast since Jeno pushed him too hard and he stumbled into a pile of arranged chairs and hitting his arm against the tables. Both students were not able to participate the gala. Walking out the classroom, you immediately went to your locker to grab a few books and jogging your way to class. It was 10 minutes before the bell rang but you had to cross over to the opposite building for your class.

"I expected you to be smarter than that." Jaemin said the moment you took your seat beside him. Confused, you frowned at him and crossed your arms over your chest.

He looks over at you and combed his black hair with his fingers. "You always go back to Lee Jeno, despite the pain he brings you. How much more until you realize you and him would never work out princess?" He says and your heart froze at what he said. Na Jaemin was right, he always was. But you loved Jeno, and despite knowing that it was wrong, you couldn't help it, you already fell for Jeno. You fell and still continue falling into this bottomless pit of darkness, unsure what lies ahead.

"Jaemin-" Before you could finish your sentence, the sound of the school's speakers blared through the entire school. "Students in Class 4A to 4C, your subject teachers are unable to meet with you, so all of you are free to leave the school campus early for today." Professor Kim's voice rung in your ears.

"I just wished you'd realize that he could never love you the way I do. And, I do genuinely hope you'd change your point of view and give me a chance. But I guess not." He said and stood up to exit the classroom. With the blink of an eyes, Jaemin was gone, and what he said to you stuck like glue.

Na Jaemin liked you? What a turn of events.

___

"Tell me. Do you really like her?" Jaemin asks as Jeno types vigorously on his phone, his eyebrow raised at Jaemin's question but spared him no look at all. "Jeno, you can't always expect for her to be there to fulfill your sexual desires. Y/N is not some toy you play around with." Renjun butts in, his glasses drooping from his face as he scribbles roughly on his notes.

The group decided to stay in their hangout spot for a few hours before actually going home. Since Jeno had been ignoring his friend, Jaemin thought this was the perfect opportunity to confront him about you. And Renjun was onboard this plan too. Although you and Renjun never talk, it didn't take a genius to notice the way Jeno has been mistreating you. He knew you were a good person, you ranked above the 20 places during exams, and you were also classmates in one subject.

"Who?" Jeno asks clearly annoyed with the two interrogating him. Deep inside he crossed his fingers that Donghyuck would just shut his mouth about the situation, for Donghyuck was always a pain in the ass to talk to, let alone have a debate with. "Look, I don't know if you're stupid or heartless, but Jeno, Renjun is right." Well it seemed like the gods hated him. Donghyuck speaks up, leaning back on his chair and blowing a puff of breath.

"So, will you just keep telling me all these things, while I am clearly dumbfounded as to who you guys are talking about?" Jeno spits out, slamming his phone on the table.

"Y/N!" Both Jisung and Chenle shouts, piqued at the tension inside the room. It seems that Jaemin, Renjun and Donghyuck were not the only ones that knew about your little relationship with Jeno, the younger ones were always observant about every little detail. If only it were possible, Jeno would've just dived into the gateway to the underworld. He'd rather die in the hands of Cerberus, or even Hades himself than to discuss about what was going on between you and him to his friends.

Jaemin closed his notebook and stared intently at Jeno, "Do you really like Y/N or not?" He asked. His voice dropped an octave lower, which shocked the others at the sudden change of tone. Jaemin was never the one to be too serious about anything, he looked at things in such a cheerful perspective, but now, it seemed all the jokes drained out of his body. Jaemin was grim, and it scared his friends, especially Lee Jeno.

"No. I don't." He answered and from there, it was as if someone had poured gasoline on the already burning flames of rage in Jaemin's system. "Then why do you still mess around with her?" Donghyuck asked, setting his pen on the table and looking up at Jeno.

"Because she's naïve. She thinks we can have this happily ever after despite knowing I'll be engaged to Seo Yun after all this." That was the last strand, Jaemin lunges towards Jeno, grabbing his collar and giving him one hard punch on his face. Everyone was taken aback by his sudden action, except for Jeno, he smirked at his friend in a daring and playful way.

"Did Na Jaemin fall in love for that cheap trash that I hook around with? Do you really enjoy picking up my leftovers? You're pathetic." Jeno taunts and before Jaemin could send another blow, Jisung pulls him away. Chenle and Donghyuck held onto Jeno, trapping him in order to avoid him pouncing on Jaemin. Meanwhile, Jisung hugged Jaemin tightly, stripping him of any way to reach Jeno.

"Jeno stop it. Jaemin calm down." Renjun steps in, his hands on both Jeno and Jaemin's chest. Despite his smaller frame compared to the others, the group fears Huang Renjun for he was always the one that kept everyone in line, especially at things like this

"This is stupid. You're dumb enough to freaking play around with feelings, yet it was wrong of Jaemin to pounce on you like that. I get that neither of you agree on the ways you feel for Y/N, but will you really cause another ruckus just for her?" Renjun says, dropping his hand to his sides while the members slowly loosened their grips on the two boys. Glaring at Jeno, Jaemin grabs his bag and leaves the room before the others could stop him. Lee Jeno was heartless, and he hated that. He could never look at his friend the same way ever again. He despised Lee Jeno, and he hoped you'd hear him out.

As soon as Jaemin walked out the room, a devilish grin played on Jeno's lip. He's always known about the feelings of affection Jaemin had for you, but he was selfish. He liked playing with you, he relished in the thought of how easy it was to fool you, to simply use you for his own selfish gains. Seeing his best friend fall head over heels for you was like the cherry on top his favorite milkshake. He savored the idea of Na Jaemin going out of his way to save you from him.

"Jeno. Please stop. Not only are you hurting her, Jaemin is in pain by simply watching Y/N act stupid for you. And soon enough, your father and Seo Yun might find out about it. Her father will lose his job." Donghyuck says, his arm patting Jeno's shoulder.

Renjun sighed beside Jeno and took off his glasses, setting it on the table. "Are you that heartless? To strip away a family's source of income just so you can satisfy your sexual desires?" Renjun asked while packing his bag. Jisung and Chenle were simply listening to the conversation while they shared a can of soda.

Jeno rolled his eyes at their remarks, but he couldn't help but think, was he really that bad? Maybe he was, but he would never admit his fault, for his pride was one of the things he valued too much. Grabbing his bag and keys, he exited the room and headed to the school's parking lot. A drift around the streets of Seoul would clear his mind, he thought.

Fisting his black hair, Jaemin opens the door to his car and places his bag in the backseat. He was infuriated with the words that spilled out of Jeno's mouth; it drove him crazy. He never knew that his own friend was capable of saying such bleak claims. He understood that Jeno needed you to calm him down, but to the extent of calling you trash and treating you like you were less of a human; it was irrelevant.

"What's got you thinking so deep hm?" Your voice, it was a soothing and a warm melody to Jaemin's ears. Looking up, your eyes connect with each other's and it was as if all of his problems drained out of his body. You've always been his source of relaxation; with you he was calm and collected. Therefore, he refers to you as his lifeline. He depends on you to maintain his serenity. And you were always successful in doing so, for a simple smile from you had always worked effectively on Na Jaemin.

At a loss for words, Jaemin simply grabs your arm and pulls you into his embrace. He was warm and soft, you wrapped your arms on his torso as he wraps one hand on your waist and the other on the back of your head, pushing your head deeper into his blazer. It was a comforting gesture, an escape to all the stress you've been through the past few weeks. "I need you princess." He whispers.

Pulling away from him, you stare up into his eyes and smiled softly, "I'm here Jaemin. You can talk to me." You said and he pulls you into another embrace. A few more minutes passed and the two of you remained in the same position until you pulled away since you had to head home, in which Jaemin offered to drive you back.

___

Your eyes were burning due to the lack of sleep, so you opted to put away your notebooks and get ready for bed. Glancing at the clock, it showed 2:13 a.m. therefore, you really needed to be in bed. You sighed and stood up from the table to walk towards your bed. Your phone buzzed from your table so you grabbed it and placed the covers over your body. Surely, your father was asleep in the room opposite from yours so he wouldn't really mind if you were still awake at this hour.

"Baby. Can we talk tomorrow?" It was a message from Jeno. Shaking your head, you left him on read and tucked yourself in your bed, drifting off into a deep, and much needed slumber.

You woke up to the sound of your alarm, and you scrambled out of bed to prepare breakfast for your father. He usually woke up later than you since his shift started around 10 am. As you grabbed your phone, a notification displayed on your screen. "Meet me at the school's fountain by 7." It was another message from Lee Jeno.

You settled the device on the table and walked out your room to prepare. As soon as you were done, you knocked on the door of your father's room and bid him goodbye, with a matching kiss on his cheeks. Then, you exited the apartment to head to school.

"I didn't think you'd show up baby." His voice greeted you as soon as you took a step towards him. He pulls you into a tight embrace and you realized how much you missed Jeno acting soft with you. For the past few months, he was always on edge. Maybe it was due to the stress that was gaining on him, knowing he'd have to take over the company as soon as he graduated.

Families like Lee Jeno's and his friends, it was never that simple. Sure, they had privileges and everything they wanted, was always served on silver platters. But that would never change the fact that they experience tremendous amounts of pressure and high expectations from the people around them. Every one of them was bound to be successful, if not, they'd be humiliated and could even be the cause of the possible downfall of their family businesses. Which is the reason why you've always had high respects for students like Lee Jeno and his friends.

Especially Lee Donghyuck. He was an heir to the second biggest medicinal company all over South Korea. Of course, the biggest belonged to his best friend, or according to Na Jaemin, his girlfriend? It was a risky decision if you do say so yourself. But who were you to judge, you were also risking yourself for a wretched relationship? Huang Renjun owned the school and his mother also owns one of the best boutiques in China. Na Jaemin's family owned a bunch of hotels throughout Asia, which actually makes him one of the richest in their group. Zhong Chenle was the grandson of one of China's wealthiest entrepreneurs and even his mother opened up her own company, in which Chenle might inherit. Park Jisung's family owns one of the best dance studios in Seoul and he is a choreographer in the industry. Overall, the Dreamies were a group of wealthy, successful and well-known individuals throughout the country.

"I would always be at your beck and call, Jeno. It'll always be that way." You whispered and he hugged you tighter. You could feel his body heat radiate and it warmed you up. Jeno always had 2 sides to him; the rough and lustful one, but there was also the soft and fuzzy Jeno. He always confused you with his ever-changing approach.

"Baby, I have to attend a business gala with Seo Yun tonight. But can I count for you to be at Mark's party tomorrow night?" He asked, his chin atop your head. For the first time in months, Jeno actually felt comfortable and welcoming.

You pulled away and stared at him, "I'll try Jeno." And yet again, he flashes another beautiful smile. Jeno was sensuous, his well-proportioned body, toned abs that could be visible through his white shirt, and his sharp jawline that highlights his features.

Indeed, Jeno had the charisma of a Greek god, he was astonishing. Lee Jeno possessed the radiating beauty of the sun god Apollo but he was cursed with Ares' wrath and temper. He was an explosion caused by the collision of heaven and hell, he wreaks havoc in his wake and does not look back on those he hurt. Jeno was a whole chapter from the Greek mythology, but he could never be the whole book, for he tore pages off himself since the day his sister fled. He was missing himself, and that was the reason why he needed you. He needed you to fill in his gaping holes.

___

He's been there for weeks. Every time you walked by to head to your locker, he was always there with his head hung low and his hood covered his features, but you knew well enough who he was. Lee Jeno, he was the new heir to the Corsair Realty, one of the biggest real estate companies in South Korea. Supposedly, it was his sister that as to take over their company, but rumor has it that she fled the country to pursue her own career. It was simply a mere conclusion, but maybe that was the reason why you've seen Jeno mope around for the past weeks.

"Are you alright?" Your voice was even softer than it usually was and that made Jeno peek up, his head raising slightly as one eye stared at you. He seemed intimidating, even with just one of his eyes glued on you. You felt bad for the guy and decided that you might come up and talk to him.

As far as you knew, Lee Jeno was a part of the Dreamies. They're a small group of students in your school that had the titles of "wealthiest" and "most privileged" students. The group consisted of seven members, and they were very picky, refusing other people to join their group, wherein only the seven of them could be worthy of being a Dreamie. Somewhat, a clique if you do say so yourself.

The Dreamies were significantly popular, not only in the school but also throughout the country. For all the members were heirs of some of the biggest industries in South Korea. Mark Lee, he was the Canadian boy with jet black hair and adorable smile. He was the oldest amongst the group, being born in 1999. Mark was a senior in your school, and one of the highest achievers in their grade. His family owns a manufacturing company in both South Korea and Canada, which is the sole reason why he might leave the country after their graduation, for he will take over the company in Canada.

Next, Huang Renjun. Renjun was probably one, if not, the most well-known student in the school for his family owned the school itself. Aside from that, he originally came from China, and his mother owns one of the best boutiques there. Renjun was the smallest amongst their group, yet he was one of the most intimidating, for he always walked around the school with his sharp stares and burning gazes. It was not often to see Huang Renjun smile, unless he was with his friends. He sported this blonde hair with soft streaks of rainbow colors in pastel at the tips of it. Along with Na Jaemin and Lee Donghyuck, the three of them are some of the smartest students in your grade.

Na Jaemin, he was beautiful, like some prince charming ripped from the pages of a fairy tale. Unlike Renjun, Jaemin was always spotted smiling and greeting everyone who greeted him. He was adorable and always had this positive vibe around him. Jaemin loved to joke with his friends and make those around him laugh. He was known to be the angel of their group for he was clingy and loved to shower his friends with soft affection.

Lee Donghyuck was like a collision between Huang Renjun and Na Jaemin. He could be as frigid and sassy as Renjun yet, he had the same positive vibe just like Na Jaemin. He had such contrasting personalities, nevertheless, his friends seem to get along with him well. Maybe that was why Donghyuck stood out from his friends, all of them stood out. However, Lee Donghyuck always had this bright vibe around him, which is why he was named "Sunshine Hyuck". Aside from his playful persona, Lee Donghyuck was the smartest amongst them, which was another reason he could be easily identified amid their friend group.

Zhong Chenle was well known as the wealthiest member. He was the grandson of one of the most successful and well-off entrepreneurs in China, and his mother owned one of the largest manufacturing company in the country. Chenle was adorable, his vibes were like strawberries and marshmallows. Besides his cute and childish persona, he was often called as the "Dolphin" due to his high-pitched screams and laughs, which you only ever heard whenever he was with his friends.

Park Jisung, he was prodigious. At such a young age, he held the title of "Nation's Best Dancer" in Korea. Well, that was no surprise since his family owned one, if not the best dance studio in Seoul. Both his parents were preeminent dancers, including Jisung himself. At the age of 14, he started teaching small groups and choreographed a bunch of performances that were absolutely phenomenal.

And last but not the least was this gorgeous man I front of you. Lee Jeno. He was often distinguished as the troublemaker in the group. Jeno possessed this bad boy vibe, which suited him well - that you could never deny. Unlike his friends, he was supposedly the only one amongst them that was not an heir, and he never wanted to be. He believed that the responsibilities and expectations that came with it was not something he would enjoy. Jeno was wild, recalcitrant and he never likes the idea of people telling him what to do. He wants to do whatever he likes without any second thoughts and without the criticism weighing down on his back. But all that changed when his sister fled the country, leaving Jeno to inherit the company.

"Why are you here?" He asked, his voice was deep and hoarse - it sounded as if he was in pain. Trapped inside the mazes of his thoughts, running around, unable to find a way out, yet Jeno would never disclose that thought to his friends. He was afraid of being judged.

You smiled bitterly and extended your arm forward, offering him a cup of coffee that you bought for Heio's. IT has always crossed your mind to approach him for you felt the need to ask him if he was alright, and today seemed like a good day to do so. So, you stopped over at Heio's and ordered a caramel milkshake and some Vanilla latte, something sweet for Lee Jeno. You didn't even know if he liked coffee, but it was worth a shot.

He takes a swift glance at the cup extended towards him and narrows his eyes at you, "What is this?" He asked, clearly still confused and maybe annoyed as to why you initiated a conversation with him in the first place.

"A Vanilla latte, I figured maybe if you were not a big fan of coffee, this was something a little less strong." You answered, yet with such dulcet and baffled voice, it almost sounded like a question. Jeno brings his eyes back to the cup in your hands, and slowly reaches out for it, mumbling a thank you.

"I'll ask again, why are you here?" He asked as he took a small sip from the cup, his thin pink lips slowly leaving the cup. You took the time to stare at Lee Jeno and his enthralling features. Sharp jawline, soft pink lips and cat like eyes that disappears into thin slits whenever he smiled. He was agonizingly beautiful, like a fallen star that ripped through the sky and landed in earth. He was bewitching, however, don't let his charms blind you, for Jeno was never innocent in the first place. He was often distinguished as the troublemaker of the group.

Jeno often got into fights, and most of them end up to be a physical fight, and he has to be sent home to treat his wounds. Now, you were never classmates with Jeno, however Jaemin and Renjun were in some of your classes. With no intention to pry, you'd accidentally read the message from Donghyuck in their group messages with the quote, "He's done it again. Jeno is all bruised and was sent home." And by the end of the day, word has already spread about another fight that Lee Jeno took participation in.

"I've seen you here a lot more lately, and I knew something was wrong. So, I decided to come up and talk with you." You muttered, fiddling with your fingers for the way Lee Jeno stared at you made you feel so small. He had such a powerful and intimidating gaze, maybe that was why his friends never got in his way whenever they had arguments.

As mentioned, if Mark was not around, Huang Renjun tends to be the one to watch over the group, keeping each other in line, yet none of them had a say whenever Jeno wanted to do something that was against their will. Lee Jeno had the aura of an alpha; he was born to lead and protect his friends. However, he never acknowledged it, for despite his powerful demeanor, Jeno always had a soft spot for his friends, he could never bear the thought of having a huge fight with any of the members. For he believed, they were the only ones that could truly go with his pace.

That was until he met you, when his heart set ablaze for the first time.

"Look, thanks for your concern, but I don't need it." He answered and stood up. That was the first time you got to fully indulge in Lee Jeno's full attributes. He stood tall and proud, he resembled a young deity, and his presence was holy and powerful. Lee Jeno was ravishing, you could definitely understand why the school hallways were packed every time his group walks by the corridors. They were full of visuals, all of them were graced with such beauty that radiated gorgeously off their bodies.

And with that, Jeno left you wondering to yourself why your heart was drumming against your chest. What was this feeling? And why did you feel like this just because of Lee Jeno? Unconsciously, a smile crept up our lips as his large figure disappeared from your view. Shrugging off the weird feeling, you stood up and left the spot, heading to your classroom in time for the first class of the day.

It's been weeks since you first talked with Jeno and you still saw him by the bench beside the school's fountain, and he still had that disappointed and tired look etched on his face. "You're here again." You said as you handed him another steaming cup of vanilla latte. Jeno peeked up to meet your gaze and slowly grabbed the cup of coffee from your hand.

"You're here too." He says and moves slightly to make some space for you. You smiled slightly and took your seat beside him. He attaches his lips to the cup and takes a small sip of the latte, his eyes fluttering as the sweet taste burns his tracks and sets his body in flames. He wasn't able to get enough rest for the past months and he really needed that energy to boost him up.

"Why do you always show up here huh?" He asks, moving his head slightly to take in your features. Long black hair, soft lips and scattered freckles on your face. You had an innocent look and he never wanted to be the one to stain that part of you. Since that day you first came up to him, he was never able to get your image off his mind, it's like you were there to remind him that despite the hell he was treading, there would always be a light at the end, and that light could possibly be you.

"It just seems like you need company." You said and Jeno chuckled, it was the first time you ever heard him laugh near you. Like said before, Lee Jeno only enjoys with his friends, without them he walks around the school with such dangerous vibes, it seemed as if he held the gates to Tartarus in his hands.

"Well thanks a lot for that, but I can manage." He says, his fingers grazing the rim of the cup softly, as if his mind was drowning deeply in his own thoughts. You smiled bitterly and stared up the sky, letting the bright rays of the sunlight caress your skin.

"You know, if you're in deep pain, it's never wrong to tell your friends or someone about it. Keeping it to yourself just adds a weight on your shoulders." You said and Jeno stops midway, his finger leaving the rim of the cup and he stared up at you.

"I know that, but I would never let my friends carry that burden on their shoulders. It's my problem, and I couldn't be selfish by dragging them into it." He says firmly, his voice an octave deeper than before.

"If they really treated you as a good friend, despite how heavy that is, they will share that burden with you without complaint. Because friends will always be there to pick you up in your darkest times." You smiled at him and stood up from your spot. It was almost time for your class and you couldn't be late.

"Hey, is there a possibility that you could be that friend?" He asked and you looked back at him, flashing him your brightest smile and a small nod, before you finally disappeared from his view.

___

A bitter smile crept up your lips as you reminisced the moments of when your friendship started with Lee Jeno. Both of you were so naïve back then, none of you would've ever thought that he would be the cause of your affliction and that he would be the one to play with your emotions. How you wish you never looked back at him and flashed that smile of yours a year ago.

Your phone buzzed in your pocket and you fished it out to check the notification. It was a message from Na Jaemin.

"Hey princess, are you going to the party tomorrow?" Jaemin usually arrived in school at around 8 am so he probably is on his way so you typed up a reply and headed into the library. Finals were coming closer than you imagined and Jaemin decided to help you out by studying with you for the next few weeks.

"I might. It depends though." And with that, you walked all the way to the library, when you arrived it was quiet, most of the students usually arrive in school around 8 or 9 am, it pretty much depended on the schedules. But you favored heading to school early just so that it's less crowded and you could study in peace for at least an hour before others started piling in.

You took out your notebook and a book based on your topics, rewriting some terms and highlighting them, going over the notes a few times before moving on the next ones. Due to the number of lessons you had to go through, you totally lost track of time until Jaemin's name and picture popped on your phone's screen. It was an incoming call from Na Jaemin himself.

"I'm in the library, where can I find you princess?" He asked and you gave him directions to where you were seated. In less than a few seconds, Jaemin arrived with his heartwarming smile and took a seat beside you, settling his stationaries on the table.

Both of you went through the lessons a few times and helped each other in certain topics where one was confused in. Overall, it was very effective tactic since Jaemin was pretty smart and you both could learn a lot form each other. Checking the time, it was almost 9 and your classes were about to start, however Jaemin's one was at 9:30 so you decided to head out first and meet up with him after class.

As you were taking down notes, Renjun's cellphone buzzed and unconsciously, your eyes trailed on the notification. It seemed to be a message from Donghyuck.

"They're at it again. Jaemin and Jeno, in the room. I need help! Jisung and Chenle are in class." Renjun knew you read it and he glanced at you; your face depicted the emotions you were feeling. Horrified and in utter shock.

"Professor may we be excused? It's urgent." Renjun speaks up and the professor nods his head quickly. He didn't question him further for he knew who Huang Renjun was, and aside that, Renjun was not one to lie, when he says it's urgent, it is. And with that, Renjun grabs your hand and pulls you out of the classroom.

"I know only you can calm Jeno down, as soon as we arrive, you need to be on his side. We'll handle Jaemin." He says both of you zip through the never-ending hallway. After a few minutes, we arrived in front of a classroom with a sign that says "Authorized Persons Only, Dreamies Territory". Renjun gave me one last reassuring nod and he turns the knob to open the door.

"Damn it. I told you to stay away from her. You bring her nothing but pain!" You could hear Jaemin's once angelic voice turn into this intimidating growl as he grabbed Jeno's collar.

Jeno was smirking, a few stains of blood decorated his lips and Jaemin has a cut on the side of his eyebrow, probably due to the rings on Jeno's fingers when he punched him. Snapping out of your reverie, you rushed towards Jeno and pushed him away from Jaemin.

"Stop it. Jaemin that's enough." Renjun's voice echoes in the room as he tugged on Jaemin's arm while Donghyuck acted as a boundary between the two boys, his palms on both their chests. You could feel the anger radiate from both their bodies, never have you imagined that they could go to such lengths due to an argument.

"Donghyuck, get Jaemin out of here." Renjun ordered the younger boy and he nodded, dragging Jaemin out of the room, leaving you, Jeno and Renjun in the tensed room. Renjun glances at you and Jeno, your hands were in Jeno's larger ones as you stared up at his eyes.

"Will you be able to handle Jeno?" The boy asked and you nodded. With that, he left you with Jeno as he ran after the two boys. Turning back at Jeno, you cupped his cheeks and forced him to look at you. His hair was all messed up and his lips had blood on it, yet he still gave you a proud smile.

"I'm here Jeno. Breathe and talk to me." You whispered and he pulled you into a tight embrace, his chin rests on top of your head and he breathes in heavily, shaking slightly in the process. The scenario played out once more in your mind and what Jaemin said the moment you came in. Who could they be talking about? You?

"Baby, you mean so much to me. I need you." He murmurs in your hair and you closed your eyes, indulging in Jeno's words, despite knowing not 100% of it was true. Jeno could never feel that way for you, for you were simply his form of pleasure, the one who he relies on to boost his ego and make him feel better about himself. You were the one he needed to fill those holes, but you alone, isn't enough for him to be truly satisfied. You could never be enough for Lee Jeno, you were something temporary, easily replaceable.

You simply hummed in response and pulled away from him. Caressing his bruised lip, you look around the room, in search for a first aid kit. Jeno points to a shelf beside the television set and you walk over towards it, grabbing the kit and settling it on the bar table. Jeno walked towards the stool and took a seat, facing you.

You cleaned up his bruises and simply stared at him for a couple seconds. He was agonizingly beautiful. Like flowing lava, it was mesmerizing and elegant looking, yet when you touch it, it burns and leaves a mark. Lee Jeno was exactly like that; you knew it since the day you came up to him. How you wished you avoid getting in his business back then, you could've spared yourself from one excruciating heartbreak.

___

Your phone buzzed as you walked out the classroom, you weren't able to focus well in classes due to the incident with Jeno and Jaemin. The scenario just kept playing in your mind like a broken tape record, you were eager to find out what was the cause of their argument. However, you respected their privacy, so you had to tone down the curiosity and focus, even just 20%.

"I'll meet you at the school's parking lot. Wait for me by my car, I'll just drop off some of my things." It was Jaemin, both of you agreed to meet up after classes since he really wanted to go shopping with you. Since it was Mark's party tomorrow and Saturday, you obliged.

You made your way out to the parking lot and caught a glimpse of the blue Lexus in the front row. Another thing about the Dreamies, most of their cars have privileges too. It was well known that the Dreamies had their desired parking spot in the school, which was always up front. Jeno's Mercedes, Jaemin's Lexus, Donghyuck's Porsche, Renjun's Jaguar and Chenle's Bugatti were always the spotlight of the parking lot. Meanwhile, Jisung gets dropped off in his Bentley, however, after this school year, his parents are allowing him to drive for himself.

You stood in front of Jaemin's car as you flipped through some notes while waiting for him. It didn't take him long, after a few minutes, the sound of the car clicking snapped you out of your reverie and you saw Jaemin walk up to you with a soft smile on his lips. "Hi princess." He greets, grabbing your hands and intertwining your fingers together.

"Ready to go?" He asked and you nodded softly, he smiles and lets go of your hand, allowing you to walk to the passenger seat and getting in the car. He jogs over to the driver's and gets in, closing the door and revving the coupe to life. He steps on the gas pedal and pulls out of the school campus, driving off into the main road.

Jaemin was warm, he was always that way. He had this comforting vibe that engulfed you, it was as if he was always there to give you a hug. Once again, it crossed your mind, why couldn't you have fallen for Na Jaemin instead? Why did it have to be Lee Jeno and his devilish aura? You felt a hand graze your and intertwining your fingers. You look beside you to be faced with Jaemin's heartwarming smile.

"What's on your mind princess?" He asked, his gaze back on the road. Jaemin was an amazing driver, he drives fast yet in a smooth way. Unlike Jeno, who treats the road like a race track, zooming past all the cars and obstacles on the way, after the car ride every car ride, you were cursed with a throbbing pain in your head. But, Jeno enjoyed the idea of fast cars and screeching tires, he dwelled in the fantasies of being able to test the limits of his Mercedes.

"Nothing." You simply replied and leaned comfortably in his seats as he places soft kisses on the back of your hand, calming your chaotic mind. As the car ride continued, your mind wandered off once more, the argument between Jeno and Jaemin.

Who could they be talking about? Seo Yun? But, Jaemin was never close with Seo Yun, he thought of her as someone who smooches off the Dreamies and gains fame by being Jeno's girlfriend. She would often ask Jeno to accompany her shopping, and it would always end up with him spending a couple hundred thousand on her. A gold digger, as deemed by Na Jaemin himself.

___

The trip to the mall was not bad. Aside from you and Jaemin arguing half the time that you would pay for the numerous bags of clothes that he picked out for you, it was definitely a fun experience. He dragged you into a bunch of the most luxurious brands and picked out a bunch of different clothes for you. You felt bad so you offered to pay, however Jaemin insisted that it was his gift for you. And Jaemin didn't take no for an answer.

So, you entered the apartment with 3 bags in your hands, and Jaemin following behind with a few more. "Good evening sir." Jaemin greeted your father as he settled the bags on the table. Your father stood up to greet him and initiated small talks with the boy. You smiled at the sight of them getting along as you tidied the table, and placing the takeout orders of food that Jaemin bought for dinner.

"Please enjoy the food. I have to leave. I'll see you again soon sir. Y/N, I'll pick you up tomorrow." Jaemin bid goodbye and left the apartment. You turned to your father who had a questioning look on his face. He sat down on the chair and waved at you to join him.

"Is he your boyfriend?" He asked and you laughed, shaking your head in response. Your father knew Jaemin and his social status as the heir to the largest string of hotels in Asia. He had high respects for the younger boy, for he saw the generosity, kindness and humbleness that Na Jaemin possessed. Your father had an adoration for Jaemin, saying how he would've liked to have a son like him. Which was the reason why he loved to tease you with him.

"Does Lee Jeno still make your heart flutter?" He asked out of the blue and your lips formed a straight line. Unable to find the proper words to answer him, you opted to simply shut your mouth. Knowing the answer well, your father nodded and decided to just eat and let you rest.

You sat on your bed, your mind wandering off to Lee Jeno. He was divine, holy. Possessing such celestial glow that only he could sport well. Jeno was your heaven and your hell. He brought you into nirvana, where you could lose all your problems, and forget about everything that bothered you. Jeno gives you that illusion of being in utopia, as if everything was perfect and set in the right tracks. However, Jeno was hell at the same time. He dragged you down into this never-ending pit of flames that scorched your skin slowly, but surely. With every kiss you shared, and every breathy moan that escaped your lips, you knew well enough you have sinned, and there was no way you could be forgiven. For it was the devil who you sold your heart to.

Sighing, you stood up once more to pick up the bags that were on your bedroom floor. Unboxing the clothes from the bags, you settled them on the bed and scanned all the different outfits that Jaemin bought for you. There was plenty of options to choose from, he liked the idea of spoiling you, in which ended up with your wardrobe full from the numerous designer brand outfits that Jaemin purchased specially for you.

You adjusted the skirt on your waist and lifted your head to look at the mirror. You were wearing a simple semi-see-through long sleeved polo tucked into a black skirt, paired with a pair of black boots and a black ribbon hung loosely on your neck. Jaemin really wanted you to wear this outfit for the party tomorrow so you tried it on to see how it would fit, and it suited you in a chic way. Smiling at your reflection, you turned around to undress and hung the outfit on your rack to prepare for tomorrow's party.

"Hey Princess, get some sleep. I'll pick you up at 4 tomorrow. Goodnight."

"Baby, I can't pick you up since I have somewhere to go before the party, but I'll see you there? Night."

Your phone buzzed from your table, you grabbed it and checked the notifications. It was a message from Jaemin, and there was one from Jeno too. A coincidence, you thought. Typing in your replies, you settle the phone back on the table and slipped into your covers, falling asleep almost instantly.

___

Slipping your black boots on, you stood up and stared at yourself in the mirror. A smile crept up your lips as you twirled around, you looked livelier in the outfit Jaemin picked. A few minutes later, a knock was heard at the door and you walked out the room to answer the door.

As soon as you swung the door open, Jaemin's beautiful smile greeted you. He was wearing a gray t-shirt, black ripped jeans and he had a black denim jacket over it. It looked like a simple outfit, yet the cost was not as cheap as it looked, for Jaemin's clothes were all from top tier designers.

"You look spectacular princess. It hurts my heart." He teases and kisses your cheek, grabbing your hand and pulling you out into the hallway. Intertwining your fingers, both of you walk down the stairs of the building and head to his car.

"Do you like the outfit that I picked out for you princess?" He asked as soon as he pulled out of the basement's parking lot. Jaemin's eyes fixated on the road as maneuvers the car into the main road. He grabbed your hand and places it on the gear, covering it with his larger ones.

"It's really pretty." You answered and a proud smile was prominent on his lips. The car ride was comfortable and quiet, aside from the small talks between you and Jaemin. Most of the time you were just staring out into the horizon as his Lexus LC500 zips around Seoul, the tall buildings and other vehicles passing by in a blur.

Soon enough, Jaemin pulled up in front of a large gateway, it was painted black and there was an obvious carving of the word "Lee" on the metal gate. A man came up to Jaemin's window as he rolled it down. "Na Jaemin." Was all Jaemin said and the man nodded, giving a signal and the gates opened, allowing entrance for Jaemin's car to enter. So, this was Mark Lee's house?

"I thought Mark lived in an apartment?" You asked as Jaemin found a parking space, slowly backing into the empty spot. There were a heck ton of cars around. Afterall, half the school was invited. This was somewhat a farewell party to send Mark off since he would be leaving the country to supervise their company in Canada for a few months.

"Well yes, but specially for this farewell party, his parents allowed him to use their house as the hosting venue. But his parents are not home. They went for a meeting in America, leaving the house all to Mark's care while they're gone." Jaemin explains, and finally turns off the engine. Unclicking the seatbelts, Jaemin exits the car and jogs over to your door, opening it and extending his hand out to you.

Jaemin was a gentleman, he was respectable and an angel. Whenever you were with him, it was as if a cloud was coating you, for he was too soft and fuzzy. He always made you feel comfortable and you never had to hide your true identity from Jaemin, for he accepted all of you without judgement. He made you feel like you were worth the world, he treated you like you were someone special, and not just some low tier student that got a scholarship from the father of you were hooking up with.

Once again, he grabs your hand and laced your fingers together, and walking into Mark's colossal home. From the parking lot, there was a concrete path that led you into a spacious garden filled with different types of flowers and plants. In the middle of the garden, there was a water fountain and a little swing. Following the path, it led you into the mansion's patio. It was decorated with a bar and some islands that scattered all over the place. There was also a grill that served some barbecued menus with a few matching waiters and waitresses ready to serve the partygoers. Up ahead, there was a sliding glass door that served as an entrance to the house itself. You were pretty sure that the loud music came from the house, it blared through the speakers all over the mansion as everyone swung their bodies from side to side, having the time of their lives.

"Hey Jaemin. I see you brought Y/N with you." It was Donghyuck, it sounded as if he was not too pleased with seeing you here. He had his fingers intertwined with a smaller girl with beach waves and soft caramel skin. Was she the best friend and girlfriend of Donghyuck that Jaemin talked about? She was really pretty, and she had a matching friendly smile that complimented her innocent beauty.

"Yeah, I thought it was unfair if I was the only one that showed up without a date. So, I brought her here." Jaemin answered, patting the elder's back and continuing with their conversation. Your eyes wandered around Mark Lee's house, aweing the intricate designs that adorned the surroundings.

"It's beautiful right?" Donghyuck's girlfriend speaks up as she pointed to a cabinet made entirely with glass. Your eyes sparkled as it scanned the contents of the furniture. There were pictures, medals and certificates well organized and displayed.

"Those are Mark's achievements. There are numerous pictures of him and the Dreamies displayed on that cabinet. It's really adorable." She said and you smiled at her. Mark Lee was very smart; he was often used as an example of a model student in the school. During their graduation, Mark left the stage with countless amounts of medals that hung on his neck. That was what made their group even more special, aside from their wealth, good physiques and charming looks, the Dreamies were blessed with knowledge above normal. Neither of them dropped from the top 30 in the rankings of the school.

"Their friendship is incredible indeed." You answered and she nods, a pretty smile ghosting over her lips. You felt a tug on your arm and you tilt your head up slightly to look at Jaemin, he was smiling at you and adoring your features.

"Would you like anything princess?" He asked and you nodded. He then left you to fetch a bottle of beer and some red wine for you. You were not a big fan of alcohol, the smell of it irked you, it made your head hurt and you could never handle it bitter and nasty smell. A few minutes later, Jaemin comes back with 2 bottles of Sapporo's space barley and Silver Oak Cellars Cabernet Sauvignon. Settling the bottles on the bar table, he then pulls out 2 beer glasses and 2 wine glasses. He passes a bottle of Sapporo to Donghyuck and pops the wine open, pouring you and Hyuck's girlfriend a glass each.

The 4 of you conversed with random topics, enjoying yourselves and keeping each other busy, trying to pass the time. It was your first time to attend such a high-class party with your own schoolmates, so you didn't really know how to keep yourself busy. Luckily for you, Jaemin, Donghyuck and his girlfriend was around to keep you company. A few more minutes pass by and you noticed a figure from afar.

Lee Jeno. He was wearing a striped polo and a pair of ripped jeans. Beside him, Seo Yun had her arms wrapped on Jeno's, she was wearing a red dress that complimented her snow-white skin. Han Seo Yun was bewitching. She had long black hair that reached around 5 inches below her shoulder, skin that was as white as snow, lips as red as cherries and a perfect facial structure. She could oppose Aphrodite's title as the Greek goddess of beauty, for Seo Yun's features were unlike any other. She was an amazing match for Jeno, she was someone that you could never stand against, for Seo Yun was nigh on perfect.

Jeno and Seo Yun were well known figures in the real estate industries. Their families hold huge titles from their company, and thus making them one of the most powerful couple in school. Aside from Seo Yun's family owning a small real estate company, her mother was one of the most influential lawyers in the country. Which made her a rival of Park Jisung's little crush.

"He makes your heart go crazy huh?" Donghyuck's girlfriend says softly, a soft smile on her delicate features. You laugh and nodded your head slightly, unable to find any excuse of why you were staring intently and Lee Jeno and the girl that clung onto his arm.

"Yeah, he does in a way that it causes an excruciating pain in my chest." You admitted and she reaches out to place her hand on yours, giving it a gentles squeeze. You knew about Donghyuck's girlfriend. She was the heiress of the largest medicinal company in the country. Lee Donghyuck's family following behind. Their relationship was inspiring and risky, yet you loved the thought of how they were willing to throw everything just for it to work out. You admired the strength that they possessed, you wished you had something similar. The courage to be able to tell Jeno how you truly looked at him, how you truly felt about him. Maybe, just maybe it could work out between the both of you.

"Have you ever considered telling him how you feel? I know both of you are best friends, so what scares you?" She asked, pulling out the question you dreaded the most; what scared you? Maybe the fact that you were already expecting his rejection. Or it could be that you knew deep inside that those feelings could never be reciprocated, for you would never be enough for someone like Lee Jeno. You belonged in cramped kitchens, scrubbing the grease off the dishes and old worn out clothes. Meanwhile, Jeno belonged in mansions, fancy business parties and tuxedos. You were from opposite worlds, and you could never be together, it was impossible.

"It's useless, he belongs with Seo Yun. They're a better match, and I could never be selfish to take him away." You answered, a bitter smile on your lips. She rubbed soothing circles on your hand and simply squeezed them softly, feeling pity for you.

Both of you took another glance at the couple who was now kissing and pulling each other closer by another bar table. Your heart clenched at the sight of them, however, you had no choice but to smile the pain away. For you and Jeno could never be together.

La Douleur Exquise.

It is the exquisite pain of wanting someone that you know you can never have. You knew very well Lee Jeno could never be yours, yet you still have this strong desire of wanting him in your arms. To have him in your embrace, and make him feel protected. To lace his lips with your kisses whenever he needed it. You didn't bother about that throbbing pain in your chest whenever you whispered "I love you" to him and he nods in return. You always ignored the shattering of your heart whenever he'd tell you, "Baby, don't hurt yourself by loving me. It's not worth it." For loving Lee Jeno was painful yet you loved that pain that came along with him.

You felt warm hands cover your eyes and slowly guide your face away from the scene. Na Jaemin, you knew it was him. Retracting his hands, he smiles at you and places a chaste kiss on your lips, letting it linger for a second before pulling away. Kissing Na Jaemin was soft, fluffy and welcoming. It was not rough and breathtaking like Jeno, it didn't leave you breathless and begging for more. It didn't feel like Lee Jeno's and that alone made you disappointed. For only Lee Jeno could have that effect in your life, only he could send you high and could bring thrill into your damned soul. Nothing else, and no one could ever change that.

"I'll be right back princess. Wait for me?" He said and stood up to leave, your eyes trailed to where he was heading towards, Lee Jeno. You suddenly felt hot, not intimately, but the kind of hot that made you anxious and scared of another possible argument between the two friends. You stood up but before you could leave, Donghyuck's hand grips on your wrist and pulls you back, "Look sweetheart, I suggest you stay. You don’t want to hear whatever they have to talk about." He says, slightly loosening his hold on you.

"I do, and I need to be there in case another argument erupts." You answered, pulling your hand back and quickly following after the two boys. They were walking off to a more isolated place where there was no one around and you quietly crept up behind them, making sure not to make even a single whimper.

"You ask to see her in this party, but why are you here shoving your tongue down Seo Yun's throat? How heartless can you be?" Jaemin's voice snapped, changing his tone into a more intimidating tone. Jeno stuffed his hands in his pocket and leaned back slightly, clearly too lazy to answer his friend.

"Honestly Jaemin, why do you care? She's just a third-tier student, while you're a part of the highest-tier, so why are you stooping down to such levels just because of Y/N?" The words that left Jeno's mouth stabbed you like a cold knife. Thrusting it in and out over and over again. He was right, you were a measly third-tier student, so why were you foolish enough to think that they could ever accept you as an equal?

You heard a low grunt escape Jeno's lips when his mouth came in contact with Jaemin's fist. "Well Jeno, because unlike you, I actually love Y/N. I don't treat her like some toy in order to boost my ego and to tell me that I am worthy. I don't use Y/N the way you do, for I actually treat her as a princess. Something you would never understand." You heard Jeno chuckle at the remarks and stare intently at Jaemin.

"Why bother liking some trash? She has nothing to offer you Jaemin, not even her innocence. She's just some form of pleasure that you could get rid of easily. So why bother picking up the trash that I scatter around?" Jeno answered smugly, his finger grazing the bruise that showed up from the punch.

"I don't care about whatever you took from her Jeno. I accept her for whatever she is and that will never change. So please, stop using her. She's had enough, if you can't appreciate whatever she has, then tell her and leave her alone. I'll be the one to pick up her broken pieces." Jaemin said, and that made Jeno throw his head back in annoyance.

"Never imagined that the nation's ideal boyfriend would fall in love with someone who scrubs grease off plates at my father's company. She's pathetic, and you associating yourself with her, makes you pathetic too." That was the last strand, your tears flowed from your cheeks in hot droplets. You never knew how Jeno looked down on you, for he made it seem like he treated you in a way that made you think that you were of sentimental value to him. But, in the end, you ended up fooling yourself and causing yourself pain. You brought this upon yourself.

Hearing your soft whimpers, the two boys whipped their heads at your direction, Jeno's eyes widening in horror. Jaemin rushes over to you and crouches down to meet your eyes. "Princess, I told you to wait for me." He said and wipes your teary cheeks with his thumb. You look over his shoulders to glance at Jeno, who's expression remained unchanged.

"At least now I know that I've been lied to and used for the past year." You spat and turned your heel, walking away from the place. Jaemin hurried beside you and spun you around, his hands wrapped around your waist and your face inches away. You could feel his hot breath fanning your cheeks and your cheeks heated up from the proximity.

"Princess, I love you. That's all you need to know." He said before sealing your lips together in a passionate kiss. Your head was spinning at the scenario yet for some unknown reason, you found serenity in it. It was as if your body felt lighter and the world spun in a slower motion.

From your peripheral view, you could see Lee Jeno in the distance. His hands still stuffed in his pockets, eyebrows knitted together and a wave of rage passed his eyes. He seemed angry, pissed at the whole situation that laid out before him. But why would he feel that way? You believed that he simply looked at you as some tool, a trash that he scatters around.

___

It's been a year since Mark Lee’s party, and it’s been a year since you last spoke to Lee Jeno. He was now the heir of their real estate company. He was officially engaged to Seo Yun a few months after the graduation. You remembered that day well, it was the day you finally knew you needed to let go of Jeno and move on. That very same day was also when Jaemin asked you to be his girlfriend.

From then on, everything started falling into place. Na Jaemin took over their company, granting him the title of CEO. You graduated as the 7th rank in the whole school and with your saved-up money from the past years, you were able to secure a spot where you built a mini café. It was a small and manageable business that your father really enjoyed.

With the support of Jaemin and his friends, the business was booming and you were able to upgrade the café, and purchase a small house for your father. It was an amazing year for you, and with Jaemin as your loving and supportive boyfriend, you couldn’t have it any other way.

Your phone buzzed as you were walking, on your way to visit Jaemin at his office in one of their main hotels. You fished the phone for your bag and checked to see the notification. It was a message from Jaemin.

“Hey princess, there was an urgent meeting that I needed to attend. If you arrive sooner, simply tell the secretary to escort you to my office, I’ll get back as soon as possible.” You smiled at the message and typed in a reply, then shoving the phone back in your bag and took a turn into the nearby mall's entrance. You decided to order some coffee for Jaemin and a caramel milkshake for you.

As you were walking to your booth after placing your order, you bumped into a hard chest. Saying you’re sorry, you look up to be met with the guy that broke your heart a year ago. He didn't look so well, the glow that he once possessed somehow vanished, he no longer looked like a young deity.

"Jeno." You whispered and smiled bitterly at him. He grabs your wrist and guides you to an empty booth, taking a seat opposite from you. "I didn't think I'd meet you here." His voice sounded that of a broken man's plea. He had dark circles and bag under his eyes, and his face screamed tired.

"I just stopped by to get some coffee." You said softly. You and Jeno left off on bad terms, but you've always taught yourself never to hold grudges, therefore you've longed forgiven Lee Jeno, even though he never apologized. That day that you said yes to Jaemin, was the day you also forgave your first love.

"How are things between you and Jaemin? Is he treating you well?" He asked carefully, you noticed his fingers fumbling with one another, probably uncomfortable or anxious at the whole situation. You smiled at the thought of all Jaemin has done for you. You couldn't have asked for anything more.

"The best I've been treated so far, he makes me feel special." You said openly and you noticed the glimpse of pain and disappointment that washed over his eyes. But why? Why did those emotions pass his face? He was the one that made it clear that he didn't need anyone like you. Jeno reached out for your hand and gave it a tight squeeze.

"Baby, I missed you." He whispered and those words struck your heart, causing another ache that you tried desperately to forget since the past year. Yes, you accepted Jaemin's affection and got together with him. You loved him, and you were sure of that. However, you would never deny, Jeno entered your mind every once in a while. And whenever that happened, you shut yourself away from Jaemin, not wanting him to see you breakdown once more for the boy that ripped your heart into shred, rendering it almost impossible to fix.

"No Jeno, you don't. You simply miss the feeling of me being there for you. You miss the feeling of having someone by your side and someone that would fight for you. You miss having someone whom you could leave wet kisses and marks on. You miss the pleasure that lingers in your body when our tongues dance in harmony, but you don't miss me. You made that awfully clear when you spat those piercing words at Jaemin, telling him I was worthless and just some girl you hook up with."

With that, you stood up and grabbed your order from the take-out counter, not sparing a second to look back at the man whose eyes glistened in tears that were threatening to fall. For in all honesty, Lee Jeno did love you, and it was no lie that he missed you as each day passed by.

He would give up everything for you to listen to him. For Lee Jeno loved you, yet his own pride and ego won him over that night, he was too full of himself that he couldn't bring himself to admit that he truly loved you. It pissed him off seeing you and his best friend act all touchy and he hated the fact that he was not the one beside you. Therefore, he used Seo Yun to make you jealous, to garner your attention, but instead it was Jaemin that confronted him. His anger got the best of him, in which resulted him to spit out lies about you, and his feelings that were bottled in his chest.

That look on your face when you overheard their conversation, shattered his heart. Lee Jeno could never handle it whenever he saw you crying, and he went ballistic knowing it was him that caused those precious tears of yours. He wanted to run to you, and cradle you in his arms, but his own best friend beat him to that. That look of yours when Jaemin ran up to you, it was that look that made him realize, at that moment, he had lost you for real.

He lost his best friend, the only one that understood him, and the only one who could be there for him in his times of need. And that happened, because he was too stupid, scared and because he could not control his ego. He lost his one true love due to his stupidity, and that thought haunted him, and still continues to do so up until this day.

His eyes followed your figure that walked out of the café with such confidence and power, it made his heart hurt. You never possessed such vibe whenever you were with him, you used to be so shy and innocent, but it seemed that Jaemin really did take good care of you. You blossomed into this powerful and inspiring woman that he looked up to. So, with teary eyes and an aching heart, Jeno stood up and sighed, his eyes still trailing after you as your figure finally disappeared from his view. Stuffing his hands in his slacks, he exits the restaurant, burying the pain he felt deep inside his chest, and cracked a bitter smile.

Lee Jeno walked away from the café, trying desperately to forget about the throbbing in his chest, the feeling of a thousand knives piercing through his organ as thoughts of you replayed in his mind like that of a broken recorded tape. Your smiles, your twinkling eyes, and plump lips. He knew it'd take him years to recover from this emotion that he tried dreadfully to bury.

La Douleur Exquise; the exquisite pain of wanting someone that he knew he could never have.

~The End~

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lancetuckershairgel · 5 years ago

Text

Summary: Chris and Lucy are reunited.

Words: 1,977

Warnings: Stealing, language, emotions, slight mention of former drug use

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Tag List: @book-dragon-13 @jobean12-blog @marvelgirl7 @southernbell91 @buckysforeverprincess @anxiousamandapanda @buckysteveloki-me @jamesbarnesappreciationsociety

AN: Cant do a read more. Also it was brought to my attention that several people didnt get notifications for Chaoter Four that was posted early last week so if you get the notification on this one let me know.

Chris climbed into his truck with a groan, his back stiff and head mildly aching. He rested his head back against the headrest of his seat and closed his eyes, no longer having to rush anywhere. The day had been long and he thanked God that it was Friday. Chris had taught three safety courses to the different fifth grade classes and had two meetings with disgruntled parents about a bullying situation and then he went straight to the college after work. School greeted him with an essay presentation, which he hated, and two exams that he really should have prepared better for.

Chris rubbed his weary eyes and ran his hand over his beard before finally sitting straight and turning on the ignition. The red Ford came to life with a grumble and he pulled out of the parking lot and onto the highway. Normally he would have gone straight home after class, especially with how tired he was, but not only was it a Friday night it was also a three day weekend and he was looking forward to an extended weekend and day off.

"You can't take care of others if you others take care of yourself." Chris' psychology professor would say at the end of every lecture.

"You need a break Chris, you always put too much on yourself." Erin often told him during one of their phone conversations or occasional meet ups at the bar.

"Yolo."

Chris never quite understood that one but the teens at the middle school seemed to use it as a personal mantra. After driving for a few miles he took a right and pulled into a gas station lot and parked. Reed's Gas Mart had been around for a long time. One of the oldest businesses in town, owned by a simple old man, had been around since 1958. The place had quite the reputation built around it. From the late fifties to the early eighties it was a place all the kids came to for an after school milkshake and a handful of candy and to listen to Jerry tale his stories. Unfortunately times changed and things became less simple. Teenagers still frequented the store but not for the shakes. Early in Chris' career as a police officer he'd made a few drug busts in the parking lot but well before that he himself had done a few things he wasn't proud of out back behind the dumpsters. Old man Jerry had caught Chris and a few buddies of his with a crack pipe once and chased them off with a broom, giving Chris a few good whacks across the back of the head all the while hollering about telling his mother. All had been forgiven though and Jerry was a good man, hard worker, and he wasn't going to let a few punk kids ruin his business. Chris gave a slight smile at the memories and entered the store, the ding of the bell overhead indicating that he had arrived.

"Hey Jerry." Chris greeted the hunched over, white haired man

"Hey Chris."

Jerry's reply was short and he didn't look up at the off duty officer. His eyes were focused across the room, narrowed toward the candy aisle.

"I got one. Just stuffed a chocolate bar in the back of 'er pants."

Chris rolled his eyes. Jerry used to love having kids come into his store, he'd even given Chris and his siblings free ice cream cones on the really hot summer cones when they were younger, but over time as Jerry aged and more and more people used his store as their personal sinning grounds the less excited the man became to see a youngster enter his store. He was always suspicious of anyone under the age of twenty five, convinced they were all up to no good.

"I'll keep an eye out." Chris chuckled lightly as he walked over to a rack of snacks.

Chris grabbed a bag of beef jerky and peered across the shelves at the suspected thief. To his dismay he indeed witnessed a crime. What was even more disheart was the fact that he recognized the beg being used to stuff merchandise inside. Blue, faded, torn. Rainbow pin and sharpie "artwork". Even with her hood pulled tight over her head, a classic move to avoid facial recognition on the security tapes, Chris knew that it was Lucy. He watched for a few seconds as she grabbed another item and quickly shoved it into her bag.

"Come on kid, what are you doing?" Chris thought to himself

Lucy made her way to the back of the store, near the personal care items and Chris ducked down and watched through the large circular mirror on the wall as she stuffed another box into her backpack. He sighed and made his way to the counter.

"You're right." Chris ssigh to Jerry with a sigh

"Goddamn kids." Jerry muttered under his breath

"Let me handle it, alright?"

"Fine but I want her out of here and if I catch her anywhere near my store I'll give her the whooping she deserves, you hear me Christopher?" Jerry wagged his crooked finger in Chris' face

"You'll do no such thing old man." Chris rolled his eyes "Put that thing away and go back to watching the game. I'll take care of this."

Lucy's head was down low as she quickly grabbed the items she had came for. Headphones were plugged into her ears and heavy metal played loudly to calm her nerves. her heart pounded in her chest as she rounded the corner to make her exit and she froze in her tracks.

"Shit." She muttered when she saw Chris standing at the counter staring at her with disappointment, his arms crossed over his chest.

"Hey Luce." Chris finally said after a prolonged stare down

Chris could easily read body language thanks to his training in the academy. He knew how to spot suspicious behavior or signs of an abuse victim and he learned to read people by how their left eye twitched or how they shifted from foot to foot. Lucy may have looked defiant, shoulders back and head high, eyes glaring death rays in a dare to interfere with her mission but Chris could see behind that. Her fingers tightened around the strap of her bookbag until her knuckles were white. Her bottom lip quivered slightly. Her pupils were wide and pleading. Lucy was scared.

"Whatcha got there?" Chris took a step forward and relaxed his arms as he gestured toward her bag

"None of your business." Lucy snarled as she stared down Chris

"Come on, hand it over." Chris sighed. He Judy wanted to go home, get a nice buzz off a few beers, watch Game of Thrones, and go to bed.

Lucy mentally walked herself through her options. Would she be able to get out the back door before Chris caught her? What if he called backup and her name ended up on a wanted list and cops showed up at the school?

"I'm fucked." Lucy said to herself and decided to comply. Maybe Chris would go easy on her.

Slowly she handed over the incriminating bag and Chris took it. He eyed Lucy disapprovingly as he looked inside and her face blushed furiously with humiliation and anger as piece after piece of the stolen merchandise was pulled out and placed on the counter. A box of tampons, a box of bandaids, a few cans of soup, a roll of half used toilet paper, and a bottle of equally used hand soap lined the counter. Chris furrowed his brow as studied the items.

"And the candy bar Missy." Jerry gruffed out with a glare

Chris glanced at Lucy and she hesitated. The chocolate was the one thing she was really hoping to get out with. Chris held out his hand impatiently and Lucy reached behind her back and pulled the Hershey bar out of her pocket. She slammed it into Chris' palm with such force that the pieces broke apart. With a sigh Chris put it on the counter with the other items.

"What do you have to say for yourself girl? Stealing from a hardworking old man, none of you have any respect for your elders anymore! Need a good ass whoopin is what you need. Even stole from the bathroom." Jerry ranted and Lucy visibly cringed

"That's enough, Mr Reed." Chris interrupted

"I want her dealt with Christopher. Arrest her."

Lucy tensed and Chris held up his hand

"Just wait a minute Jerry. Look at what she's got here. This looks like necessary stuff, doesn't it? Luce? Is everything okay at home?"

"That's not your business." Lucy held back the tears, letting anger overcome the sadness

"Is your dad not buying things you need?"

"Stay out of it!" Lucy hissed through her teeth, shaking

"I can't help if you don't talk to me, kiddo." Chris tried "Lucy I ca-"

"You're not in charge anymore. You don't work for my school because you left." Lucy spit the word out like it left a bad taste in her mouth and she stepped closer to Chris "You're not even on duty, you can't do shit. What are you even wearing?"

Chris looked down at his red plaid button up shirt and frowned.

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing" Chris asked, slightly offended

The realization that Lucy had never seen him without of his uniform came too late. Lucy had snatched the Hershey bar and bolted, the door slamming shut behind her.

"Lucy!" Chris shouted but there was no use. The girl was gone. Chris groaned and buried his face in his hands as he leaned against the counter.

"She left the property. I'm calling the police." Jerry stated as he picked up the landline phone

"For christ sake old man it's a candy bar. Puts you back what? A buck twenty five?" Chris took the phone and put it back on the receiver and slammed a couple dollars on the counter "In fact…"

He walked back to the cooler to grab his sought after beer then grabbed a proper back of bathroom tissue and a bottle of soap.

"How much for all of it?"

Jerry shook his head but began to ring up the groceries.

"You keep coddling these kids, Christopher, and none of them will learn their lesson. It'll be $48.62. "

"No wonder people steal from you." Chris jokes as he ran his credit card through the machine. He knew Jerry couldn't control the inflation and prices of goods these days. The old man swatted at him but did crack a toothless grin.

Chris bid farewell to Jerry and took the bags out to his truck. He placed them in the front seat and drove off, keeping an eye out for Lucy the whole way home. He had no idea where she lived and with it being a holiday weekend it'd be Tuesday before he could get Erin to get her address out of the file.

"Hang in there kid." Chris muttered as he parked the truck in his driveway.

Lucy ran until her lungs burned. Tears streamed down her face and she collapsed to her knees, sobbing. She shouldn't have to steal to provide for her family. She cursed herself for not telling Chris what was going on but she couldn't. He wouldn't help her, he'd just call the social services and they'd ruin everything. She caught her breath and wiped her eyes angrily before standing up and brushing the dirt off her jeans, cursing herself again for getting them dirty knowing it'd be a few days before she could wash them. She clutched the broken candy bar and made her way back home not ready to face the fact that she was going to turn up empty handed.

#destroyer!chris #sebastian stan #fan fiction #fanfic #safe haven

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carreraleigh · 6 years ago

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I'll always remember you (Colt x mc)

Part 1

A/N: this story is going to have two parts, I hope you like it! Tysm for helping me again @vienroose

Summary: After nine months Ellie realized that there are people who can not be forgotten.

Rating: NC-17, NSFW

Tags: @courtesan-of-garage @zig-nazario @queenkaneko @lovehugsandcandy @client-327 @vienroose @the-red-jhon @rwanchoices @storiesofsass @brightpinkpeppercorn

Inspired by:

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Ellie entered the room with a few books in her hands, they were much heavier than she thought. Trying to keep her balance she moved closer to the nearest sofa and dropped the books on it. She let out a sigh that she didn’t know she was holding until that moment, it had been a complicated day. She had been in class all day, final exams were closer than ever, and just a few hours ago she had had an unreasonable fight with her friend Lily, a girl she met on her first day at college. Ellie looked up at the calendar hanging on her wall, one of the things her father had given her before she left. She observed the date that was marked in a circle, it was today, November 18. Ellie already knew that the only thing she could think about all day wasn't exactly that date, but what had happened a year before that same day.

Her first kiss with Colt.

A wave of nostalgia invaded her body, she felt like those memories were still fresh in her mind. It wasn't the first time she felt that way, she asked herself if she ever really stopped feeling all that and the answer was always "no". She was about to finish her first year of college, but she had never stopped thinking about the past, it was as if a part of her stayed with him that last day, the day they said goodbye. She hadn't heard from Colt since, and she wondered what he might be doing at the time, it was a question she asked herself more often than she wanted. She tried to call him on his phone a few times in the past months, but it was always off. She came to the conclusion that he changed his number, it was a logical explanation considering he had to disappear from the map for a while.

She got up from the sofa and went to her room. She lay down on the bed closing her eyes, trying to rest a bit, but she couldn't, those moments she had lived with Colt invaded her mind and didn't leave her alone. She opened her eyes again and sat down, angry with herself for letting all that affect her, she felt a strong pain in her chest and suddenly, without warning, her eyes filled with tears. Ellie didn't fight them, she was tired of fighting those feelings, so she let them take her. She missed him, there wasn't a day when she didn't miss him, she missed his kisses, his body, the way they could accomplish anything they wanted together, she missed the adrenaline she felt when she was by his side, waiting expectantly for his next move. She missed him, that day more than ever.

“Ellie?”

She raised her eyes full of tears and fixed her attention on the figure that had appeared on the door, it was Julian, a boy she had known for a few months. He didn’t study the same things as her, but they had become friends thanks to friends in common. Julian and Ellie had a strange relationship, they were definitely not just friends, she had slept with him a few times, but they were also nothing official, even though Julian had alluded to his desire to be with her several times. He was the guy Ellie had always wanted, he was attentive, kind, romantic, dedicated to his studies and the best in his class, but still somehow she couldn't fall in love with him, she appreciated him al lot, yes, but it wasn't enough. And it wasn't his fault, she knew she was the problem, she knew she couldn't leave behind that love she felt and it didn't seem fair to start something new knowing she couldn't leave her past behind, and she was far from letting all that go.

"Why are you crying?" Julian came over and sat next to her, wrapping his arms around her.

"It's nothing." Ellie said wiping her tears away, Julian looked at her intently.

"I came to see you," Julian put a hand on his cheek "I heard you had a fight with Lily this morning, and I wanted to see if I could distract you somehow."

But the fight with Lily wasn't the reason she was like that in the first place, and it wasn't the reason she needed a distraction. She looked at Julian, who looked at her with a smile as he stroked her cheek, Ellie wanted to forget everything for a moment, she just wanted everything to stop hurting. She pressed her lips with his, taking him by surprise. Julian held her back and laid her as he climbed on her, leaving hungry kisses around her neck. Ellie let out a groan when she felt Julian's hands get into her underwear. He began to move his hands slowly, sending waves of pleasure all over her body, she closed her eyes and her mind traveled elsewhere, she thought of the first time she had slept with Colt, the way he had touched her in the same way, his delicate fingers that made her tremble in a way Ellie could never forget, and for the moment it was like he was there with her, as if he had never left.

She opened her eyes quickly, forcing herself to return to reality. Julian continued to work with his hands, still kissing her on the neck, but her desire was no longer there. It was true that the two had nothing serious at the moment, but it was not fair to Julian, to sleep with him thinking of another man, Julian deserved more than that.

"Julian." Ellie said, her voice sounded so cold that it made Julian look at her automatically.

"Is there a problem?" he said, slowly pulling his hands out of her underwear.

"I'm sorry. I really don't feel like it" Ellie said sitting on the bed.

"Well, a moment ago it seemed like it was." Julian raised an eyebrow, Ellie tapped him on the shoulder.

"I just can't concentrate." she didn't like lying to him, but she couldn't be honest either, she didn't have another option.

"Don't worry," Julian kissed her on the forehead "If you want we can just watch a movie and eat some ice cream."

Ellie thought for a moment, considering the offer. Until an idea crossed her mind.

"I really want to take a ride in my car." Ellie looked for the car keys in the drawer of her nightstand "Alone, if you don't mind."

"You want to be alone, I get it" Julian said raising his hands, surrendering "I just want you to know that whatever you need, I'm going to be here for you."

Ellie knew she could count on Julian for anything, he wasn't just someone she could sleep with, he was also a good friend and a good shoulder to cry on when things went wrong, he had never let her down.

"Thank you, Julian." she said with a smile, slowly leaving the room.

Ellie was driving fast down the avenue, a cold wind hit her face as she raised the volume of the song that was playing on the radio. Driving had always made her feel better, it helped her distract herself and immerse in her own world, but this time she didn't want distractions, she wanted to feel again everything she had felt months before, and she felt it. She felt all the happiness the crew had given her, all the good times she had with them. She remembered all those little moments with Colt, all the laughter they had shared, the unconditional support they had for each other, that feeling of being able to eat the world with one bite that she had every time he talked to her about ruling the city together. She remembered the words Colt had spoken that last day.

“Every time you get behind the wheel, you’ll think about the crew, about me. About this part of your life. About this exact moment.”

Almost a year had passed and the bastard was still right. Ellie laughed to herself, he was never wrong about her, it was as if he could see her soul, all her fears, all her desires, he knew everything about her just as she knew everything about him. She looked at the cactus that Colt gave her that day they caught The Brotherhood, she had it there always, it was one of the few things she had left of him, that and one of his T-shirts she brought in her backpack. Ellie didn't remember how that appeared in her home, but she had no complaints. Those were the two things that made her feel, somehow, close to him.

She slowed down as she saw that she was reaching her destination and parked the car to the side of the street. She got out of it and began to walk forward, her heart was beating faster and faster as she took more steps. After a long time she was there again, the same place where they had shared their first kiss. But that place wasn’t only the place where they first kissed, it was also the place where she saw for the first time the other side of Colt, that vulnerable and sensitive side that he tried so hard to hide from everyone.

She sat at the edge of the cliff, looking at the horizon. The sea moved calmly beneath her and she remembered how much fear she had to jump that time, but she did it, she did it because Colt needed it at that moment. She also won that day, she overcome that fear because of him. In one way or another he always pushed her to her limits, that was one of the things she liked most about him. The laughter of the two as they hugged and kissed resounded in her head, distant memories of that day. She let herself be carried away by these thoughts, and she could see herself and Colt in the sea, splashing each other like that day, she smiled almost out of inertia, letting that moment sink into her skin slowly, she was daydreaming it.

Ellie heard sounds around her, but she ignored them completely, in that moment there were only her, the sea, and that bittersweet memory that had never left her. She heard footsteps behind her and, as if by magic, all of her thoughts vanished when she heard the only thing that could bring her out of that trance, the only voice capable of bringing her back to reality.

"I knew that someday I would find you here again."

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echoes-of-realities · 6 years ago

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be my fire in the cold (and I'll be waiting by the mistletoe) - 23/25

* * *

[From the Start] // [Fanfiction] // [ao3]

[Previous Chapter] // [Next Chapter]

Chapter Summary: Brittany has a very important question; Santana starts to find a little bit of resolution.

Notes: Thanks for the patience yesterday! I think my assignment and my exam finally sent cause they haven’t bounced back yet? So I think I’m officially DONE the semester thank god lmao

Chapter 23: old excitement makes people happy

///

Brittany is the very first person to show up to the rehearsal, an hour before they’re going to start, which is weird because Brittany’s not scheduled for any rehearsals today.

The surprising sight of Brittany this early in the morning is far from unwelcome though, and Santana’s entire body starts buzzing just from her mere presence, still on high alert from how close Brittany’s lips were to hers. It seems every time they try to kiss they inch a little closer before being interrupted; if Santana were a more superstitious person than she is, she would be a little worried that the universe was trying to sabotage them. As it is, that’s only a thought she entertains when she wakes up with a start at three in the morning, and she tries harder to be the optimist she never was and instead keep her mind on the fact that third time’s the charm.

“Hey,” Santana greets with a wide smile, shuffling her papers all together on the top of the baby grand piano, trying to gather her heart as it leaps towards Brittany, “What are you doing here so early?”

“Well,” Brittany drawls as she steps fully through the door and crosses the rehearsal room, singsong the word all the way until she reaches the opposite side of the piano too, “I have a question.”

Santana smiles and makes a soft acknowledging sound. Brittany’s cheeks are splotched in pink and she’s chewing on her lip, blue eyes looking everywhere but straight at Santana, and can’t imagine what would even make Brittany so nervous.

Brittany runs her hand along the shallow inner curve of the piano edge for a long moment, collecting her thoughts, and Santana just patiently lets her. “I was wondering,” she starts and then trails off. There’s a beat of silence but then Brittany takes a deep breath and Santana can actually see that thread of steel that fills Brittany’s body like liquid courage as she finally meets Santana’s eyes; the playful and adoring sparkle in them takes Santana’s breath away just like it always does. “I was wondering if you had any plans for Christmas Eve tomorrow or maybe even possibly Christmas Day?”

Santana bites down on her smile so she doesn’t overwhelm Brittany by fainting or something, but it does nothing to stop the surge of love and adoration that shoots through her body. “You know I don’t,” Santana teases, because she can’t help making Brittany fluster just a tiny bit more.

“Well in that case,” Brittany says, and then takes another deep breath, “I was thinking that since I don’t have plans and you don’t have plans then maybe we could, like, have no plans together. Possibly at my apartment?” she adds like a question, and Santana’s speechless for a couple moments while she’s trying to convince her heart not to run away to Brittany; at this point she’s pretty sure it’d be too late anyways because Brittany seems to be the keeper of that particular organ.

“I’d love to,” Santana says with a soft smile, feeling everything that’s bright and warm and happy well up inside her body.

“Yeah?” Brittany breathes, bouncing on her toes a little bit, waiting until Santana nods to let her smile grow until her eyes are scrunched up by her cheeks. Santana can see the exact moment that Brittany gives up on keeping her happiness contained and instead rounds the piano to reach Santana and pull her into her arms, tucking her head against Santana’s neck and nuzzling her nose there.

Santana thinks about everything she could say, love declarations or a cool façade, a million promises or the only one that matters, but instead she just settles on the simplest words she knows, mumbling her Yeah against Brittany’s shoulder and she supposes it’s enough because she can feel Brittany’s smile against her neck and it’s kind of the best feeling in the world.

They remain caught up in each other until a knock on the door smooths reluctantly draws them apart, Brittany’s hands trailing down Santana’s arms until they can tangle their fingers together, her smile still wide and uninhibited.

“It’s probably Brad,” Santana finally says, “I should go let him in.”

Neither of them make try to move though, until the third knock and finally prompts Santana to reluctantly release Brittany’s hands and go to the door.

///

Just like when Santana was getting ready to go have supper with the Pierces, she’s a little nervous about spending Christmas with Brittany; not because of Brittany or anything, and it’s not even a bad nervous, it’s just about what it all means. She’s in love with Brittany, and she’s like ninety-nine percent sure that Brittany returns her feelings, but still, Santana worries about everything just by nature, especially the big important things.

And just like before, Mike, Tina, Quinn, and Mike all refuse to stop teasing her as soon as they find out, Mike and Tina unable to hide the fact that they’re secretly over the moon for Santana. She really couldn’t care less about any of their knowing looks or suggestive comments because joke’s on them, she gets to spend Christmas with the most amazing girl in the world and none of them are invited.

Her and Brittany eat supper together and then get recruited into being Mercedes’ Christmas elves by helping her wrap all her presents for her nieces and nephews; Brittany doesn’t mind wrapping even if she’s not very good, but Santana is meticulous and stubborn and, though she takes forever, her folds are perfect. When they’re nearing the end of the presents, Mercedes’ phone ringing startles all of them and she quickly steps out into the hallway, and all it takes is Brittany smacking Santana on the ass with a wrapping paper roll before they’re in an all out war.

Brittany has the height advantage over her, but Santana is nothing if not stubborn, and she just keeps going at Brittany without minding how much she gets beat on with the wrapping paper roll, both of them giggling too hard to smack each other with any amount of finesse.

Mercedes comes back to Brittany trapped in a corner of the dressing room and trying to ward of Santana’s blows, Brittany’s wrapping paper roll uncoiling and bent in half and Santana’s looking more limp noodle than not. At Mercedes’ teasing chiding, it takes little more than a look before Brittany and Santana turn and gang up on her, beating her back to the couch until they all collapse there, laughing and relaxed and Santana doesn’t feel lonely at all, just incredibly loved. For a moment everything is quiet and comfortable before Brittany loudly announces that she’s going to the bathroom and disappears before Mercedes and Santana can even acknowledge it.

Mercedes instantly turns to Santana and gives her a tiny smile. “Listen, about the other day when I went all protective best friend, I just wanted to say sorry for expecting the worst.”

“It’s fine,” Santana smiles little and shrugs off Mercedes’ apology, “I totally get why you want to protect her but I— I don’t think I could ever hurt her without hurting myself more.”

Mercedes smiles and quickly pulls Santana into a tight hug. “You know,” she says into Santana’s ear, “You’re not at all who I pictured Brittany would fall in love with, but somehow you’re everything I pictured for her too.”

“Love?” Santana whispers, trying to keep her her hope under control, but it flutters around in her stomach in the form of hundreds of bright butterflies.

Mercedes pulls back and grins, her hands warm and comforting on Santana’s shoulders. “What are you blind? That girl is so in love with you,” Mercedes promises, “I’ve been teasing her about how dreamy and blushy she gets whenever I even just mention you for weeks. I’d know, I am the protective best friend after all.”

Santana laughs and relaxes a little bit; Mercedes has basically just confirmed everything she suspected and it’s comforting to hear it from Brittany’s best friend, but she doesn’t think she’ll be able to completely believe it until she hears it from the source herself. Santana grins and shrugs a little. “I have protective best friends too,” she teases, “Mike’s given the third degree to every single girl I went on more than one date with.”

Mercedes grins, delighted. “I never would have guessed, but I can also totally see that. He plays the brother role so well.” She nudges Santana with her elbow. “How many girls has he scared off on you?”

Santana smirks and shrugs. “Oh he does a lot of questioning but he’s not who Brittany has to worry about. Tina’s so much more intimidating than him.”

Their laughter draws Brittany’s attention as she steps out of the bathroom, and when she softens as she looks at Santana every single doubt she has drains out of her from the adoration brimming in those blue eyes.

“See?” Mercedes whispers softly beside her, “I told you so.”

“Oh shut up you,” Santana says but there’s no bite to her tone. She has all the fierceness of a kitten revealing their soft underbelly and begging for scratches, and Mercedes can’t help smiling a little as Brittany and Santana make eyes at each other.

She was right all those weeks ago, they’re absolutely smitten with each other.

///

Mercedes disappears after they’re done, Sam showing up to help her haul the presents back to her car, their arms equally overflowing with presents. They still have a bunch of time left of their supper break, so Brittany and Santana end up sitting on the floor in front of the couch like aways, cuddling close together in comfortable silence or quiet teasing each other with an ease born of absolute adoration and friendship.

“You know,” Brittany says casually, rolling her head to look the side to look at Santana fully, her fingers trailing over Santana’s bicep where her arm is wrapped around Santana’s shoulders. “We’re not really friends,” she drawls teasingly, “You haven’t accepted my friend request from ages ago.”

Santana shoves at Brittany’s shoulder and giggles. “You goof, you only sent it when your mom was teasing you about the fact that me and her were Facebook friends but the two of us weren’t. I watched you do it.”

“And yet you still haven’t accepted it,” Brittany pouts, “You big meanie.”

Santana giggles again and rolls her eyes as she digs her phone out of her pocket. “Fine,” she teases, “I’ll do it right now.” She opens her Facebook app to a horrendous amount of notifications that she quickly opens for like the first time in ever, getting rid of the red from everywhere before she opens the friend request tab. Brittany grabs her own phone off the coffee table while Santana’s app loads, waiting for to watch her friend request to be accepted.

Brittany’s request is the second request at the top of the screen, right under her sister’s, but its the name that’s below Brittany’s that freezes every cell in Santana’s body as she stares blankly at the name, reading and rereading it over and over in an attempt to understand what it means and why it was sent and whether it’s real or not.

Brittany shifts beside her and leans over to look at Santana’s phone, wondering what the hold up is. “Who’s Alma Lopez?” she asks quietly, obviously realizing what’s caught Santana’s attention.

Santana clears her throat and shakes her head wordlessly for a moment. “My abuela,” she finally manages to mumble, and there’s a split second of confusion before Brittany’s face floods in sympathetic understanding.

“Oh, honey,” she whispers, tightening the arm she has around Santana and tugging her as close as she can, dragging Santana onto her lap.

Santana just shakes her head wordlessly again, disbelief warring with bitterness warring with dangerous hope in her chest as every old ache she’s ever had flares up and overwhelms her. She lets herself be held and soothed by Brittany’s arms around hers, warm and strong and safe. “I don’t— I don’t understand,” she mutters, and anger starts to win out over all the other emotions, “Why’d she send this? Why now? It’s been a fucking decade! Why didn’t she just fucking pick up a phone and call me? A Facebook friend request is the best she could do?”

Brittany’s quiet for a long while, letting Santana rant and release her anger but not loosening her hold on her. When she speaks, it’s only after Santana’s tired herself out with her tirade and slumped back into Brittany’s arms. “Maybe,” she starts hesitantly, “Maybe she didn’t know how to reach out.”

“Well she has a brain, surely she could have figured out something,” Santana mutters, less angry and more bitter now. “She might be in her eighties but she’s not stupid.”

Brittany hums in acknowledgement and the sound buzzes through Santana’s chest and calms her a little. “Maybe she couldn’t—”

“How hard is it to pick up a fucking phone?” Santana interrupts.

“Sorry,” Brittany says after a moment, “I meant, like, maybe she couldn’t find you.” Santana considers that for a moment, turning the over in her head before she gives a tiny shrug, and Brittany takes that as her cue to continue. “She’s your dad’s mom right?” Santana nods against Brittany’s chest, the move nuzzling her closer. “And I’m sure your dad doesn’t have your number.” Santana considers this and nods again, curling her hand around Brittany’s hip and drawing comfort from her warmth. “So maybe once she was ready to reach out to you again she just had no way of finding you. I mean, you said you got rid of your mom’s landline when she died, and that was probably the only number she had.”

Santana wonders, for a moment, if any of her family back in Ohio even know that her mom died; they were all her dad’s family, and once Santana and her moved to New York they never once tried to reach out again. She wonders if abuela knows that her mom died, if that’s when abuela pulled her head out of her ass and tried to reach out, if abuela is hurting as much as Santana is from the estrangement.

“I hate when you’re being all logical and genius-like,” Santana finally mutters.

Brittany presses a long kiss to the top of Santana’s head and she can feel the smile against her hair. “I could be wrong, and if I am I’m so sorry to get your hopes up. But I don’t want you to be sad at Christmas, not when we both just got happy again.”

“I can’t be sad around you, Britt,” Santana mumbles, hiding her blush in Brittany’s neck, “You make me too happy for the sad thoughts to stay around too long.”

“You make me so happy too. But I’m the happiest when I’m making you happy,” Brittany admits, her voice tight and watery, “And I’d really like to continue making you happy.”

Santana smiles and purses her lips to kiss the skin against her mouth, soft and lingering. “Then just be here,” she says, “That makes me happy. When you’re here with me.”

Brittany sighs and they sink further into the couch, Santana drawing comfort from Brittany before she works up the courage to open her phone and look at her abuela’s Facebook page. She’s more than a little shocked to find that the first picture on the page is a picture of her, young and surrounded by Christmas wrapping paper, beaming up at the camera with an easy bake oven her abuela had gotten her so she could bake just like abuela. There’s no caption, but it abuela shared it just a couple days ago, and it makes Santana’s heart ache to know that her abuela might not hate her anymore. A little further down there’s a shared link about George Balanchine’s The Nutcracker and the new production stage manager they suddenly hired, and then there’s another picture of a young Santana posted on her birthday, and a couple more from random days; what really catches Santana’s attention is the fact that her abuela never captions any of them, but Santana can feel the regret radiating off of them anyways.

It’s enough to bring tears to her eyes and she quickly turns away and buries her face into Brittany’s chest, blinking back tears and willing herself to breathe deeply.

“What do you want to do?” Brittany asks softly.

Santana thinks for a long moment, weighing her options and letting Brittany’s fingers trailing over her arms comfort her. “I think,” she starts slowly, “That I’m going to wait until after Christmas to make a decision.”

“Yeah?” Brittany murmurs against her hair.

“Yeah,” Santana confirms, and then she cuddles back into Brittany’s arms, dropping her phone on the floor beside Brittany’s hip, “I just want to spend the next couple days with you.”

Brittany’s breath catches and jerks Santana against her chest a little, Santana nuzzling closer until she can find Brittany’s heartbeat, everything about Brittany softening and comforting her until all of her anxiety and anger regarding her abuela is a distant thought compared to how right it feels to be wrapped up in Brittany’s arms.

“I’d like that too,” Brittany whispers, and Santana just hums and snuggles closer.

#brittana #brittany pierce #santana lopez #glee #brittana fanfiction #glee fanfiction #mercedes jones #brittancedes #my writing #story: be my fire in the cold (and I'll be waiting by the mistletoe)

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