#fierefitz is squired to percival and lucan TOTALLY isn't jealous or anything definitely

[fluffypotatey]

OMG, so Soft™, Merlin bby, ofc they like you.

I put my vote in for Roland being Merlin's unofficial squire, bc A) just as Extra as Merlin, and B) gets many more excuses to Stab. Like, "Yes, sir, I'll stay right back here while you fight sorcerous assassin du jour and if your magic doesn't work, this dagger will."

A child learning morals from the morally dubious would be A+ content.

Merlin: Agravaine is the traitor, I'm certain of it.

Roland, immediately: I can put a viper in his sheets.

Merlin: ........as much as it pains me to say, please do not do that.

Roland: Well, okay, but if you ever change your mind, I can get one in, like, an hour.

Merlin: *deep inhale*

Also, I don't know why, but I'm picturing Roland as a girl. Like, maybe she heard about Morgause challenging Arthur or even saw the duel happen herself and was like, "Huh," and when Arthur does away with the 'nobility only' rule, she's like "Huh," and immediately goes for it. But girls still can't apply for knighthood (yet, bc gotta take baby steps with social change like that) so maybe Roland is her family name or a brother/cousin, and she just lops her hair off, steals some trousers, and falls in with the lads. She's young enough when she joins that she can pass for a boy. When they get a little older, well, by then her bros have all twigged but also know she can and will kick their asses, so they just make sure she gets tunics that are always a little too big. Bonus if legit nobody else notices this, including Merlin, and the only person who does know is Gwen, and she ain't saying a damn thing. Double Bonus if the first person to notice is Arthur, and the Squires immediately and without hesitation straight up lie to the fucking KING.

Arthur: *squinty eyes*

Arthur: Is.....is Roland......a girl?

SotRT: What? No, of course not, sire, don't let him hear you say that, you'll hurt his feelings.

Arthur: ........uh-huh.

Cue Gwen cracking tf up in the background like, "JFC, I married the biggest himbo in the Five Kingdoms, Arthur, you're lucky you're pretty."

(Also, here are my tokens of returned affection in courtship: 🌹🌸🌼🌺💐💍👑💎)

same gwen lmao

*slams hand on table* ROLAND IS ONE OF CAMELOT'S BEST SQUIRES AND YES SHE WAS INSPIRED BY MORGAUSE

she didn't really ask merlin if she could be his squire. she just started hanging around him, helping him with chores, being his lookout until a couple knights asked and she said: "uh duh, i've been his squire for three months now" "your my WHAT?!"

roland had and will cut a bitch if they threaten merlin. oh, you're glaring menacingly at the king's manservant? roland is breathing inside your walls, have fun sleeping bitch. you told merlin to count his days?? count your seconds, bitch, roland is behind you, axe poised and ready to strike--

all of agravaine's inconveniences, that's roland. ok sure, merlin said no to the snakes, but he never said no to rats! he didn't say yes either but why would you question the method to the madness? his saddle never fits right. his food is always cold. his clothes are always dirty. agravaine knows something is up, but none of his spies are able to find out who is causing all of this???

the other squires help her plan the pranks and very illegal tampering with noble goods, but he called merlin "nothing more than a chair for the king" and they are out for blood.

agravaine complains to arthur about how unruly the squires are but arthur cannot believe it. because that meant that his knights couldn't handle them, but they could and that's a slight on his men which he cannot forgive. it's one of the only things agravaine couldn't trick arthur into believing. roland later soaked agravaine's sheets with spoiled mead, serves him right!