#fatal and mephisto is kamiki's song

[yuseirra]

Ch 160 ..let me jot down my stream of consciousness about what I feel, my reading comprehension skills can't be that bad, it'd help if I can sit down and think through a little more.

+ Okay, I'm complete! I understand things much better now!! Upon close examination, This chapter doesn't change anything so dramatically.

IT STILL DOES NOT ANSWER JUST WHAT THE DAD'S MOTIVES ARE, but... the conclusion I have after having reread it thoroughly??

It's that my interpretation of him as a mild guy still stands—it enhances it, even. He's still really kind, which is a pretty surprising conclusion compared to what I felt about it at first glance.

He's.. really kind and considerate. I'm serious. wow.

well, analysis/interpretation below!

I was spoiled about chapter way back sometime last Friday, right? and it was pretty accurate in sense, with it being just some bunch of sentences and that one really creepy panel.. it does help to see the actual art and the expressions that are associated with the dialogues.

Now that I sit down a bit, there are two different interpretations of the same story: Kamiki's testimonies on what's happened (I believe these are all truths. They perfectly match up with how I've interpreted his character all along.) and Aqua's takes on them.

I'm not reading things off the english version btw, so the dialogues may differ.

According to what Kamiki says,

-he considered Ryosuke and Nino as good people and as friends. But they approached him because they were obsessed with Ai, so he didn't know about their true colors.

-so he was able to talk about his breakup with her and talked about whether if he should visit her having children at the hospital where Gorou was. They went and killed Gorou, but Kamiki had no idea about that.

-on the day Ai died, he was still unsure about meeting her because he lacked the courage to see her face (god he's timid) so he asked Ryosuke to give her his bouquet on his behalf

I KEPT SAYING THIS GUY NEVER HAS IT IN HIM TO "SCARE AI!!!!!!!!!" HE LIED IN 154 OUT OF GUILT BECAUSE HE THOUGHT AI AND AQUA WANTED REVENGE ON HIM!!! SEE!!! I'VE BEEN!!! RIGHT!!!! I'VE BEEN!!!!!!!!!!

This was already in the leaks last Fri, I basically felt the same way about these back then

and I got every part of these right except for the part that Kamiki befriended them. I just couldn't picture the people who killed Ai or would actively go hunt their daughter down being his friend..

but seeing how.. much he seems to trust people, he used to be that way as a child, it actually all ties so nicely together.

I predicted that it was Nino and Ryosuke who went to the hospital and killed Gorou.

I predicted that Kamiki just wanted to send the bouquet to congratulate Ai but he couldn't go because he was nervous/sad from the phone call. I said that ever since I started drawing hikaai fanarts, you would have seen me going on and on about that, I drew them with this as the base!!!! The guy Ai chose wouldn't do such a thing as trying to get back at her!!! See??

I couldn't be more right!!! I am a prophet!! I should trust myself!!!! why am I so unsure of myself, really. I really, really did get everything right.

These must be all true. He's not lying about any of this. I've been analyzing this guy very very thoroughly so I know what I'm talking about.

I guess what's confused me was the latter bits, since Fri and even after I see the full images.

Kamiki smiles and says he never wanted to hurt anyone<this is really how I view him as well, this guy can't hurt people out of his own will...

However, Aqua dismisses Kamiki's statements as lies on the spot, and accuses him of having been unable to protect his own daughter. That he's been intentionally manipulated people to get what he wants. That would involve him causing people to kill each other without dirtying his hands.

Upon hearing Aqua stating "You wanted to kill your own daughter", Kamiki makes this really eerie smile (I kind of wish this is redrawn hshsh.. it looks like he's a demon spawn from hell, but this could REALLY be him being distressed yet AGAIN. this guy SMILES when he's that way. That's his coping mechanism. It's kind of hard to stare at that expression but that smile certainly ISN'T a happy one like the one we saw in 159. This is a really confusing habit he has. People are going to take him the wrong way but; sadly, it's become a habit of his...)

The scenes then shifts to visions of him manipulating nino and Ryosuke into doing what they've done with a smile. If this is really what's happened, then he IS someone pretty evil-

but now that I read it over I think that's just based on Aqua's interpretations about the guy.

Is what's being portrayed in those pages ACTUALLY how he is? Just yesterday, I theorized that Kamiki loves his children and has been doing whatever he's been doing for his children. I did have my reasons for making that claim.

We still don't know what his motives are!! Aqua doesn't state anything about why Kamiki would do such a thing if he's done so. Does he know anything about this??? Just what reason would make it.. enough to have someone kill the love of their life and their very daughter? What good would it do for Kamiki? For one thing, does he have ANY good reason to kill Ai at all? For having felt betrayed?? Then why wait out that long????? Killing their daughter? After having her live for, how long now? how old are they now? 15?? 16? Why now? Why would he??

The important thing would be just WHY he'd be doing all those things if he's really been so, so WHAT IS IT AQUA?? WHAT??

Forgot to mention this but in the beginning of the chapter, we have kamiki saying, Hm, but what did I do? Did I "stab someone?" did I "push someone off a cliff?" I never "did" "anything".

Then we have Nino going "Kamiki-san didn't do anything. He just talked about Ai. He talked about her so we(her and Ryosuke) wouldn't forget about her. That was enough to make us break."

OH come on. COME ON. HUH. I feel like he's never told them anything bad about Ai, he probably let out how much he loved and misses her, because he thought they were her fan and coworkers as a fellow member, I bet he was happy to befriend people who knew about Ai because they share a common interest together. With it being his favorite person in the world even while he was dumped.

What a stupid reason, Nino. You brought everything upon yourself. I can see that now.

I do think.. kamiki has some sort of power that causes people to grow insane or act out, that could have had some influence on ryosuke and nino in a way...

but again, why would he try to kill his lover and his daughter even if he can use it with his own accord??? Even if he's using those powers now?? Would he use it to do those respective things?

Even if he has those, that shouldn't be all there is to it. According to Kamiki, they were already obsessed with Ai when they approached him and YEAH! Makes sense?? They came to him first, probably already aware that he was Ai's lover?? He isn't responsible for them hoarding those kinds of feelings!!

Coming to think of it, I find it really strange that he still hung with nino being the complete wreck she is. Oh wait, I guess he still could. Ryosuke killed Ai and Nino doesn't seem to have played a part with that. Nino was there with Ryosuke when Gorou died but she's not the one who's pushed him off a cliff. Ryosuke's the really...horrible one. He had a pretty gf like nino JUST WHY. Then again, nino was obsessed w Ai too so they were a match. I guess Kamiki hanged with Nino thinking she's just another victim who wants Ai back or whatever. He still hangs with her when she says that are super creepy like she can't forgive Ruby if she surpasses Ai though.. Perhaps he's really bad at letting people go.. OH, YEAH. He was always pretty attached to people as a child. Okay, I got that part cleared up on my own. Stream of consciousness is like this. It can happen.

Continuing on!! Aqua says Kamiki is a "despicable, selfish liar, worse than a murderer". Even Kamiki can't smile hearing that. If he ISN'T one, then that'd hurt.

Well, he responds again, saying:

"Ah, yes. You're the same way as I am. You share those same eyes I have. The type of eyes that grant the power to persuade others into believing you. The eyes that grant you charisma, befitting that of a star." Then we see a panel with Ai, "The eyes of liars, that fool, and make others submit to you"

he must be thinking of what Ai's told him when she talked to him about having the same eyes. (CH 140)

"You've been inciting people just like I have, right? Just how many people did you fool to fulfill your goal?"

"It must have felt good to use your talents to impact the lives of others, right?"

I'm not sure if this is a taunt/mockery or just him stating the facts as a liar/a black star user himself.

If he's thinking about Ai... then it can be the latter. She approached him saying "they are the same". He could be thinking about that.

Actually, he's strangely calm. His emotions are a bit hard to read on this one, I'd say it actually feels collected compared to what he's heard.

This could actually be sympathy or empathy...

I didn't take it that way when I first encountered it, so I felt.. Kamiki could be lashing out a bit but no. That doesn't seem to be it.

Hey, he really never gets angry. He actually looks a bit sad depending on how you look at it, I think he may be feeling a sense of guilt in that particular panel where he says "Just how many people did you fool to fulfill your goal?", the one where he glances down,

just like how he talked to Aqua in 152, "It's a lie, isn't it? it's because they're important that you keep your distance from them. why would you go that far to bottle yourself up?"

This guy understands his son really well. In fact, I think he may be trying to say, "we're the same=I understand the way you are, we're on the same track" the way Ai's done for him. That's what was his salvation.

Aqua does not take this well.

He says yeah, we're both terrible beings, but Ruby is "different".

Oh, and the rest.. what's stood out to me is the panel where Aqua goes,

"sending love to the one who desires for love" as he describes what Ruby is doing. Kamiki shows up in that panel.. This is what Ai wanted to do for him.

and there's a panel that comes up that shows Ai with the twins that follows right after saying:

"it's the eyes of the one who desires to love someone"

This is really sad. I think that page actually indicates Ai desired to love him while he desired to be loved from Ai. That happened both ways. It was a nice page.

Yeah, and Aqua points his knife to his dad like a toy gun saying

"You must disappear right here and now, for Ruby's sake."

I don't think Aqua's actually up to stabbing him, actually? If he's pointing the knife at him like that, I think it's more like he's warning him to stay out of their way forever, scram, or just go die off on his own.

Both of his eyes are white, he's not going to kill him with his own hands, rather, he's going to make him go away.

So I don't think next chapter would start on a fierce note? Kamiki does not seem like a guy that gets agitated so easily. He STILL never once got angry in this chapter as well. He's still pretty sweet to his son. I'm not being biased on this, the way he talks has always been really soft. If this were to be an anime, you'd hear how he'd talk and see whether if he has thorns in them but I don't think it's that way at least, I think he's trying to be understanding??

This guy is soft. He will not put up a fight. I don't know, he may jump off that bridge and try to die maybe. If that's what his son wants? Move out of the way? He doesn't seem.. angry about it all. He's not even protesting.

In the end, the only thing that got proven in this chapter was that Kamiki DID NOT DO ANYTHING IN A PHYSICAL SENSE, AND HE DIDN'T TRY TO SCARE AI.

the fact about him manipulating people and lying to get his way, I think there's low chance of it being applied for Ruby and Ai's case.

I think he really didn't have a clue Nino would attack Ruby? If he's considered her as a friend?

what are the basis of Aqua picturing him that way? He must really hate his dad. There is no way he could have seen such things happen. Unless Tsukuyomi told him about it?? there is no proof that it's what's actually been taken place. Kamiki could have incited people, or influenced others, yeah, but I don't think he did anything to Ai or his daughter. Again, I think he loves his family. Why wouldn't he??

Until things get cleared up more, I???? I ACTUALLY?? think Kamiki's taking it in a really calm manner despite all the things he's being accused of??

This is very long, but that is all for now!!

Oh, this was worth revisiting and analyzing. There's a lot more I see when I scrutinize it like this!!

[yuseirra]

I've a feeling that Mr Akasaka believes they're really clever and they think they’ve given us all the necessary hints already but no one gets it

If you search for "Aratate Shrine," it's an information that comes up right away!

I opened the volumes again after a long time for reference, since I was planning to draw a fan comic.

At the end of Volume 8? Or the last part of Chapter 80? When all the characters went to make their wishes? Page 189??

There’s a narration there that says, "Was it because their prayers were answered, or was it someone’s guidance?"

And on page 186, it even confirms that the location is Aratate Shrine!!!

Now, look at the description on the tourist guide website! It says this:

A shrine that is often visited by celebrities, Aratate shrine is said to bring good fortune in show business and marriage. This shrine is dedicated to Sarutahikono-mikoto and his wife Amenouzume no-mikoto who gave directions to Ninigino-mikoto the grandson of the sun goddess(Amaterasu) upon his descension from the heavens. While walking through the grounds of the shrine, you will see ancient trees called sakagi which are said to grant wishes. One of these trees called Shichi-fukutoku-jyubangi is said to grant 7 wishes to those who hit the tree 7 times. Take your best shot and stock up on good fortune!

I feel like I already brought this up a long time ago when I was researching and linked it back then!!!!

Kamiki, that guy, is a guiding deity!!!! Sarutahiko is a god of guidance and also a god of light!!! That’s his identity!!!

The one who granted the wishes there was him!!!! If there's ANYONE in this comic who is that Sarutahiko god, it's Kamiki!! He helped Ruby’s career, later granted the twins’ wishes, and even helped them find him. The hint is in the "Mephisto" lyrics—it’s like he’s saying, "Come find me." He granted their wish to come to him and kept supporting the twins. In his own way, he thinks of himself as their father. Even near the end, there’s a mention of wishes again, right? It seemed like he wanted to grant them. It’s like he wanted to do something for them.

He’s a god who guides the way and leads people’s futures in a good direction!!! He’s the black star, and Ai is the white star.

Right now, all the wishes have been fulfilled in strange, distorted ways, haven’t they? That’s because this guiding god’s power has been corrupted and is now malfunctioning... It’s Kamiki’s fault. He's the selfish giant star that's been ruining people's lives as said in the song Fatal. But I’m not sure if this is something intentional or not.

For wishes to be properly fulfilled, Ai has to be with him. The two of them need to be together to make it happen. The wishes end up being granted with flaws because he's incomplete without his wife regarding that ability!!! He's wishing upon a star in Mephisto to have Ai come back to life, isn't he? He needs her to complete him and function! That's why he'a been looking for her and her love ever since she passed!!!

I don’t really check Japanese fandoms or other people’s reactions, but is there no talk about this in Japan??? This is the answer, isn’t it???? Has no one figured it out? I’ve been talking about this since July or August, but people won’t believe me. Then I just casually opened the volumes to reference the art, and I saw that. Now I have a headache. This is correct. If this isn’t right, then what is it? What’s the explanation? The story doesn’t make sense otherwise.

Why else would his name include references to a god and light? And I’m telling you, Ame-no-Uzume is Ai!! After Ame-no-Uzume married her husband, she started blessing love too. It’s said she’s the reincarnation of the morning star!!! Seriously!!!

Kamiki is a god, but it seems like his power has been distorted somehow, and it doesn’t even seem to be entirely intentional.

If you analyze the lyrics, they mention a flaw arising. That flaw came after he lost Ai (love).

His ability to guide the future got all twisted, and as a result, everyone around him started becoming miserable and dying.

Why isn’t this addressed properly in the story??? Because it’s not mentioned, no one gets it, but I’ve been saying for months that this must be it~~ This must be it~~ It’s so frustrating!! But since this is what's beyond logic and too fantasy, even if I think it is, it just isn't convincing, is it?; I understand, I feel stupid myself too but,

There are way too many traits of Kamiki that align perfectly with that god for this to be a coincidence. And why else would there be references to him being noble, or him drowning??? Ugh!!! Seriously!!

Isn’t it possible that things just didn’t work out the way he wanted them to? He probably never wanted anyone to get hurt, at least not until Ai’s death. This person seems to have the ability to influence the future, but if everything had gone the way he wanted, would his life have ended up like this? The fact that both Aqua and this person ended up drowning is proof of it—they can make wishes come true, but everything gets twisted in the process.

What if this person fell apart because of it? What if even he didn’t want these results? At the very least, some of the things that happened don’t seem like they were his intention. Ai’s death, for instance—there’s no way he wanted that. He probably really just meant to send her flowers. But because of the darkness in the entertainment industry or whatever, everything about him was already so broken that it unintentionally spiraled into the worst outcome due to his broken powers.

That’s why he completely lost it… He’s searching for Ai (Ame-no-Uzume-no-Mikoto), isn’t he? There’s even that line about him wandering in search of love (Ai). I think it’s from Chapter 160 or so. He wants to get his wife back. Collecting the white stars probably had a real connection to that goal—it seems like it actually worked in some way.

Then what about all the other incidents? The deaths of so many people? After he "died" (?), didn’t people start acting like they were breaking out of some kind of trance, with a bunch of them suddenly confessing and turning themselves in? This isn’t something a normal human could do. Is it that he passively exerts influence just by existing, or did he actively use his abilities to make all that happen later on?

Anyway, he is a god!!! But what if he really meant it when he said he never intended to hurt anyone? What if that’s true? No way, right? Isn’t this all just him spiraling out of control in his desperation to bring his late wife back?

I really think this interpretation is correct, but shouldn’t the story have addressed this explicitly?!

If you’re Japanese, is this something you would’ve known? Do people get it? Is it common sense?; Do they understand what’s happening in this story? Does everyone know? Shouldn’t this have been explained? Without researching separately, you might get the feeling that something’s off, but there’s no way to uncover the full story just from the work itself. And yet, these kinds of clues exist, don’t they? I’m telling you, my interpretation is correct. Why don’t they clarify this? For a story to work, you need to at least tell us what it’s about.

I really think this is the answer… No matter how much I think about it, there’s no other coherent way to interpret it.

That’s why it’s so frustrating. No one takes it seriously and I get that because even I feel ridiculous insisting that a character is a god!! but there’s no other explanation for it, right? I thought the story would address this before it ended. Isn’t this such an irresponsible piece of work? At the very least, they should’ve wrapped it up so that we could understand what was happening. Why didn’t they?

I’ve never tried to feel something intentionally.

But what this character feels... it’s just too overwhelming. The emotions of suffering are so vivid that I can’t help but think there’s something more to it, and it keeps bothering me.

For a character accused of being a psychopathic serial killer who supposedly murdered his girlfriend, I couldn’t help but think, he doesn’t seem like someone who’d do that. That thought bothered me so much my head hurt.

But in this case, isn’t he grieving? The song conveys sorrow and pain, doesn’t it?

This kind of emotion doesn’t feel like something someone who hurt their loved one would express. It’s grief, longing, and an unbearable desire to see them again. And it’s not entirely one-sided—it feels like it stems from a mutual bond that once existed. The more I look at it, the clearer this becomes. If I couldn’t see it, I wouldn’t bother putting my heart into this. But once I do see it, there’s no way to ignore it.

It feels like the emotions are so strong because there was a time when they loved each other deeply, got along so well, and were happy together.

Am I the only one who feels this way? I don’t think so.

I don't think he ever wanted nor attempted on things to turn out this way. There IS something about the guy that influences those around him into disaster.

This darn manga… It hits so hard, and yet, look at what it’s become. But it seems to follow mythology, so I can sort of understand why it turned out this way, and that makes it slightly forgivable. But do people get this? Do they know why it happened like this? No way. You can’t know unless you look up the mythology. If you’re going to incorporate mythology into the manga, at least explain it! This manga isn’t entirely grounded in reality anyway—there are gods, reincarnation, wishes, star eyes, and some kind of mission or destiny!

I'm not trying to defend Kamiki, either way he seems to have become a hazard of some sort.

And before that, Ai passed because Kamiki is guiding god whose powers-the power of Michihiraki-which brings out the best in people-, got distorted into being the opposite of what it was meant to be due to the darkness of the industry?

So people like Ryosuke had their worst sides coming out and that influenced him to murder Ai. In that case, Kamiki would feel a sense of responsibility for it and try to reverse it (if he's figured out his destiny-or what he is-)because even if it were to be unintentional, it'd still be his fault in a sense. That's why he has this bizzare behavior of blaming himself continuously for things.

I'm not sure if everything about this is solely what he's brought upon himself. If he has those kinds of powers, maybe people just die and end up misforunate from him wishing to feel Ai?

(Yeah then we had him thinking killing Ruby would have helped him to feel her. But he didn't do it. Was it only because Aqua tried to stop him? What is going on?)

Well, when someone dies, they’re no longer by your side, so their presence begins to fade.

I think this person… just couldn’t bear that. If you look at the lyrics of the songs, they convey those types of emotions.

From what I feel, his feelings towards Ai isn’t about worship either—it’s just pure longing towards what he regarded as his other half. But I bet a lot of people won’t see it that way. The story doesn’t make it easy to interpret it like that, does it? Ha… it’s frustrating.

Sure, a character who’s a clingy psychopath has its own charm. But if someone who isn’t like that is written to look that way, shouldn’t the story take responsibility for it? Either say it isn’t true, or confirm that it is. Why do I feel like I’ve figured out the answer, only to constantly doubt myself, wondering if I’m spouting nonsense?

The narrative and abilities of the god of entertainment couple align way too closely with Ai and Kamiki. Not just on a similar level—it feels like they are them. Was that not important? I think it’s an essential element for explaining why the story unfolded the way it did. They SHOULD have touched this before they go.

You know, I wonder if there's a way to tie up Hikaru's characterization between 155 and post 160.

Like in another version of onk where there's more time and effort put into it. The end result is Aqua and Hikaru falling into the ocean but the process is different, do you think it's possible to do that with the same amount of chapters?

I think I said this ... ? somewhere ?? in my tag previously but I think a really low effort easy way to make this make even a moderate amount of sense is just to alter Tsukuyomi's little monologue at the start of 161 and have her state that the Jokerfied Kamiki of post-160 is the direct result of having his worldview shattered by realizing that Ai had loved him all along and that he killed her for nothing. Like, as an exercise to prove this, I bullshitted this together in a few minutes;

please be nice about this dialogue i came up with it in 10 seconds

Is this good? Eeeeeeeeehhhhh. I think having Kamiki be the final boss after 154 is just so mid and such a boring way to end his arc, but I do think something like this would be an improvement. At the very least, it makes the sudden, jarring shift between the seemingly defeated and remorseful Hikaru of 154-5 and the Anime Supervillain Hikaru of 160+ actually motivated by something in-story other than "GO CRAZY GO STUPID" but I also think it makes the bitter tragedy of Aqua's death hit a lot harder. Now it's not just Kamiki being arbitrarily ontologically evil in the way that most conveniently puts him in conflict with Aqua - this is now a tragedy that Aqua brought on himself by continuing to pursue getting revenge on Kamiki and rubbing his nose in his mistakes.

Obviously this is still messy as hell and it doesn't solve all the dumb shit with Aqua's ""reason for existing"", but I do think the Kamiki we get on page in OnK is not unsalvageable as a character and it legit would've taken very little to make him internally consistent in a way that was engaging.

Oh uh, we're cutting the serial killer cult bullshit though. That's just dumb.

[yuseirra]

My beloved Fatale

[yuseirra]

a family bigger than 4! part 11

just small things

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / side story 1 / part 5 / part 6 / part 7 / part 8 / part 9 / side story 2-1 / 2-2 / 2-3 / 2-4 / part 10

[yuseirra]

You have given me a fatal flaw Selfish giant star, ruined lives

(ref to 147 too~)

[yuseirra]

161 makes me convinced that he did see the public's reactions towards Ai's death...

if he's really broken, I feel that's one of the things that's contributed to it.

[yuseirra]

I'll risk my life, I'll give it to you Did you not give me time? If all my desires came true, oh, how I wish I could attain that I want to see you I wish upon the stars

(coming to think of it, he's the one that's associated with "Desire" when it comes to feelings related to love-ch158)

[yuseirra]

I've actually become really.. Even more confident with my hikaai analyses (until I get proven wrong..haha) hear me out on why I feel this way, okay?

In the latest chapter, it was revealed that Ai's boyfriend is someone who offers things for Ai, and falls into ruin because of it. He believes there is some kind of destiny for himself. That much, we can all agree with, huh?

If that’s the case, then "Fatal" is this person’s song.

In that case, I’ve already secured the basic points if this were a test, and now I’m just waiting to collect the extra points!

It’s not really about me trying to convince myself...this is really true!

From the start, I always predicted that Hikaru’s breakdown only happened after Ai’s death. The question was never whether he fell apart, but rather how much. He’s always been such an ambiguous character whose exact actions were left unclear.

I got this part right, and honestly, it was the most important part. It wasn’t this person who harmed Ai. (So actually, Aqua’s target for revenge is no longer this person. It’s easy to miss this since the story moves so quickly.)

It’s also confirmed that he was originally a genuinely good person. This part was validated when the god herself confirmed he had a noble and refined soul.

This means Hikaru is not the kind of person who falls into ruin just because something bad happens to him. It was Ai���s death that led to his downfall. In fact, considering everything this character has been through, this makes him closer to "kind," and his mental fortitude is incredibly strong. The idea of him being "noble" aligns well with this. So, ultimately, this confirms that the personality depicted in the flashbacks(the movie arc) is accurate to his true character.

If this is the case, it also explains why Ai liked him so much and wanted to save him, making everything fall into place.

Now, the only question that remains is whether he will actually be saved or if he will remain a terrible criminal. (And honestly, this is the same situation the character was in before the movie arc—it’s like we’ve come full circle. However, now there’s the added advantage of two key pieces of information: Ai wanted to save him, and he really was originally a good person.)

To be honest... I feel like we need to see how the character himself acts before we can properly judge him.

It’s similar to judging a real person.

I feel it’s still too early to jump to conclusions just from seeing a text that goes he's a terrible guy who's killed a lot of people. There hasn’t been a single image of him doing anything specific yet... So, while we can take it into consideration, it is only when we get more detailed flashbacks or scenes where the character himself expresses his own thoughts, that will likely confirm everything.

Given that everything I predicted so far has been right(I really, really did get so many things accurately), it feels highly likely that the story will go the way Ai hoped, with this character being saved.

I’ve been following closely, and I've noticed that even in his "ruined" state, this character still shows a lot of kindness. Plus, he’s an actor and just as much of a liar as Ai was, so you have to really pay attention to interpret him correctly. You can’t just believe what you see!

Right now, I’ve scored over 70 points out of 100 if this were to be a test, but I feel confident that I’ll end up with over 90.

Since we’ve already established that he didn’t hurt Ai and that Ai genuinely wanted to help him, this means there’s a strong narrative push in that direction, and my conclusions about the character are likely to be right, which makes me feel even more confident.

If "Fatal" really is this character’s song, then yes, the emotions in that song—desire, disappointment, despair—are definitely present.

But surprisingly, the song has much less selfishness or possessiveness than one might expect. So, I felt like it wasn’t such a bad kind of love, which is why I’ve depicted that couple so much.

It’s a love where you give and give, without expecting much in return. You just want to hear their voice, to catch their gaze, to have them comfort your pain again. The lyrics even mention that their "fatale" belongs to "no one". It’s a kind of selfless love where you want them so desperately that you can’t live without them, while offering up everything you have, but asking for so little in return. This is a very devoted love. If it were one-sided, it might feel overwhelming or creepy, but with Ai and Hikaru, it’s mutual.

If you look at Hikaru’s actions in Chapter 160 (his testimony is likely the truth, even if Tsukuyomi’s stated goal is real, that kind of motivation would only arise after Ai’s death.) It means this person didn’t have confidence that Ai loved him, so he desperately craved her love in this way. That makes it pitiful. He makes a pass to be Ai's lover, in my book. He seems like a good person. And I take love VERY seriously... haha... I believe love isn’t about receiving, but more about giving. It’s about giving without regret... The narrators of "Mephisto" and "Fatal" embody this a lot.

They don’t ask for much from the other person while giving everything they have. That’s the kind of love Ai’s boyfriend has. What he gives may be a question,(or questionable) but I doubt Ai would have failed to notice a guy capable of harming Ruby(their own daughter for goodness sake) or involved in serial killings... haha. Plus, if he’s described as once having been "noble", a person like that probably wouldn’t cross that final line. Ruby didn't, and I find Ruby having taken after his character quite a bit, they make the same expressions. There’s a higher chance he kept his boundaries intact.

Things will unfold the way Ai wanted them to. The things this person has actually done are quite different from what’s been said about him.

He’s not someone who acts strongly or aggressively—he’s too gentle for that. It’s not that he’s pretending to be kind while having a foul heart; rather, I see he’s pretending to be dark when he’s actually not, which is why his true nature shows through.

It’s true that Ai found and fell in love with a genuinely good person, and they had a period where they were happily together. So I can already see the story heading towards him being saved after being broken by her loss. Ai wants to save the boy who's been deeply suffering and is straying far off after what's happened to her. That's the narrative the story is heading towards, it's the most natural path and I see it coming. Ai is right. She found someone REALLY sweet and he got destroyed, so she wants to help him get back to the way he was.

I’ve gotten the overall structure right, and now I just need to collect the extra points :)

[yuseirra]

At this point, it's getting on my nerves!! How are they going to explain all this if it ISN'T how it is?? As bizarre this whole logic about gods are, it's never left my head and it never got debunked and IT ONLY GETS ENHANCED...HOW ARE THEY GOING TO EXPLAIN THE WEIRD THINGS THAT'S BEEN HAPPENING IN THIS WORK? I'll be so frustrated if they don't!!! It's just so weird!! I've been waiting for answers EVERY WEEK and they never do, the last three episodes were TERRIBLE, they keep beating around the bush even while having our protagonist dead, things are so vague, I just want the truth already so WHAT WAS UP WITH THIS GUY. HOW COULD HE ACHIEVE ALL THESE THINGS. All the clues I caught up till now led me to believe pretty sincerely that Hikaru really was a god of some sort, if THAT'S not going to happen, I just want to know what's been really happening with him and all the incidents with him involved and 50 pages will never be enough even if all of it is devoted to him. I just have no hope, literally but I want to UNDERSTAND this piece. They can't end it without explaining ANYTHING. THAT GETS ON MY NERVES. SO WHAT WAS THIS GUY EVEN?? WHAT WAS THE TRUTH. I DON'T AGREE WITH AQUA ON PUBLIC WISHING LIES. I WANT TO KNOW!! THEY BETTER TELL US!! I've been wrapping my head so much to figure just WHAT this guy is ever since I got back into this series and I deserve a proper answer. I'll take it if they could just give it to me...they sure took their time and I'd HATE it if they never do

[yuseirra]

I've been looking at the myths, it may be Ai(Amenouzume)'s video that she's left to Ruby(Amaterasu) that will encourage and lead her to step out of her room after her brother Aqua(Susannoo)'s death. In that case, this would also match up with the myths of Amenouzume having led Amaterasu out of a cave when she hid in it, due to her brother and it explains why we haven't seen the video Ai's left to Ruby.

Sigh.. So that would certainly take up a portion of the final chapter the way I see it, there's just...not enough pages to explain anything at all in decent depth. This isn't what this piece deserved. I can't hope so much...

I'm still really bitter how the wish she's left to Aqua wasn't able to come true!!; wh y... At least.. At least her bf found out she really did love him back. I feel that'd still be a blessing for Kamiki although it did make him break down(I WOULDN'T HAVE DIVED BACK TO THIS SERIES IF THAT CHAPTER DIDN'T EXIST. AND EVERYTHING WAS PAIN AFTER THAT. WHY...what did I do to deserve this HELP)

[yuseirra]

On the other hand, she disappeared. The warmth of conversations repeated with my partner Easily turned into hatred in my mind.

In that moment, my consciousness surged, My head filled with an overwhelming amount Of calculations that felt like they would never end.

This is the "transformation of human tissue." Doesn't the color in those sharp, clear eyes Seem almost monstrous?

I'll draw it just like I did back then, "Like you and me."

I’ll never forgive—if there was a bright future, It was all taken away from that day onward.

As if to confirm my own existence, today, once again—

Let’s start the experiment, with a countdown. Shall we open that door, just one more time?

I've been listening to Dead and Seek as I draw this guy(check the link..why am I convinced that what's happened to him is EXACTLY like what the song's story goes. Please give that song a listen, it's very cool!!)

I watched the part where he appears and his eyes are actually REALLY LIGHT compared to what I thought it'd be?? That'd mean his eyes were originally of a bright hue, hey, could it really be that it were to be a different color before having shifted into this current lavender? IT COULD HAVE ACTUALLY BEEN GOLDEN..I can't give up on that because it works with his name you know???;; what if it really got tainted into that color?

ALSO!!!! HE IS THE GUY WHO'S BEEN MAKING THE WISH:

"I want to see you" in Mephisto!!!!!!! "I want to get closer to the only Ai" in Fatal!!! HE HAD HIMSELF THE WISH TO MEET AI AND BECOME CLOSER TO HER!!! THAT'S WHY HE KEPT TALKING ABOUT WISHES WHEN HE MET HIS CHILDREN!! HE WAS WORKING TO MAKE THAT A REALITY!!! HE MADE THAT WISH "UPON A STAR"! And that star must have somehow given him the idea that he could achieve just that if he did whatever he was doing, that's why he couldn't stop!!!

He's all like: "If life returns to you, if it reaches you I don't care what happens to me" (Mephisto)

"Without you, I cannot live anymore I would sacrifice anything for you"(Fatal)

RIGHT??? RIGHT???? WELL, THAT'S WHAT'S BEEN HAPPENING!! HE WANTED AI TO LIVE!! HE WANTED TO GIVE EVERYTHING HE HAD FOR HER SAKE AND THE STAR GAVE HIM FALSE HOPE!!! or maybe if he did go through with it Ai could have been brought back in a way, so that's why he was all like he can't die now or that there's something he must still do. He realized Ai loved him back so, I guess that made him even more extreme in the recent eps because it made him even more desperate, Ai did so much for him...he doesn't care about his life you know?? He was already good as being dead after she passed. I think THAT'S what's been happening regarding Kamiki. I don't think it makes sense any other way. He wanted Ai back..he thought he killed her and was overridden with guilt after it and wanted to do something to reverse it. And the way I see it, something took advantage of his feelings and caused him to grow insane and drift apart from his innate tender self.

[yuseirra]

Ch 161~

Can't draw so much during the week..!

More commentary about 161..

I'm actually convinced Fatal and Mephisto should be Kamiki's song?? I think some things hint of it.

and that he DOES really care about Aqua.

and that he does have to do with Sarutahiko, Amenouzume's husband(although this part is a speculation)

More stuff in the read more:

(first written in another language and chatGPT helped me translate it... I can't write things like this twice ;v; it's a great world here. so convenient~)

Honestly, it's frustrating and a bit agonizing; what is this even about? The plot is stressful, but...

Still, being able to focus like this... I guess it’s a good thing to find a work that hooks you and makes you think deeply in some way.

LOL, it also means I’m living a life where I have enough time to care about a manga, even though I’m currently in a pretty tough spot.

This manga, whether it's in a good or bad direction, seems to be driving me crazy in its own way.

If I’m disappointed, I can always go read something else, (I even got permission from someone to draw a Persona fanfic fanart, but I’ve been too hooked on this manga to do it.. that fanfic was so good.. I need to do it sooner or later..).

But I was so confident about my analyses. Like, really... I’m usually good at picking up on these kinds of things? This manga is great at psychological portrayal, and it was amusing to analyze that, There are just too many things sticking out for me, and things feel uneasy.

It’s not about the pairing... It just keeps bothering me... Am I really missing the mark on this? I’m usually good at sensing these things...

Without the movie arc, this development would be fine, but that arc is sandwiched in there, and I interpreted the character based on that too...

Honestly, every time I listen to the songs, I get this strong feeling like, "This isn’t Aqua." The kind of emotions in these songs, it's not him that's singing them. It's the dad. I immediately posted about it when I first heard it in July. As soon as I heard it, I thought, "This is it," and got a gut feeling.

I really want to feel that emotion again.

Even if Kamiki does turn out to be a serial killer, I still think these songs could describe his inner state.

I think we’ll get some explanation in the next five chapters or so, even if it takes a bit longer.

Also, the expression Kamiki makes when Aqua stabs him is so genuine. Until that moment, he had been smiling, but...

If that expression was because he suddenly felt threatened with his life, it’s a bit pathetic. But... I don’t think that’s the case. What I really pay attention to are the emotional flow and expressions.

When Aqua says he wants to watch Ruby perform, the smile on Kamiki’s face... it’s soft. That’s... definitely a look of affection. It’s not like, “Oh, I've won him over!” or, “Yes, I’ve convinced him!” I interpreted it as Kamiki having paternal love, and there was a scene that backed up that idea earlier. I’m sure he really likes Aqua.

That’s not a bad expression. It’s more like, "Yeah, you wish to see Ruby, don't you. Go ahead, watch her. Keep living" (Which makes me wonder, is he really planning to harm Ruby? If he harms her, maybe he plans to do it after the Dome performance? But even that doesn’t make sense. Does that mean Aqua would have to come back to stab him AGAIN after that takes place?? Does it really add up to his logic for telling him to go watch her?)

Aqua says Kamiki will destroy Ruby’s future, but...

How exactly is he going to do that? Hasn't this guy literally done nothing? If they're talking about the Dome performance, at least that should go off without a hitch, right? So at least until then, Ruby would be safe?? So, Kamiki isn't planning to harm Ruby now at least, right? Even with that weird.. logic that he proposes (I hope he's lying about that tbh)

Then when Aqua smiles and says something like, "Haha, but I’ll just kill you and die with you," while pointing the knife at him again...

Kamiki’s expression at that moment really stands out, and it’s not like a twisted look of being frustrated about things not going his way. It’s not anger or annoyance he's feeling. It’s the same shocked and despairing expression we saw in chapters 146 and 153.

Aqua seems to have no clue what kind of person his father really is, huh? He can’t read him at all.

Honestly, from the way Kamiki speaks, I get the impression that he’s actually quite kind. He’s not saying anything too wrong.

Remember the scene where Ruby gets angry because people were talking carelessly about Ai’s death? Kamiki probably knows about that too. I think Aqua and Ai, and Ruby and Kamiki, are quite alike in nature. Kamiki might’ve felt a lot of grief over Ai at that time. I do believe he loved Ai.

The phrase, "People don’t want the truth," is pretty painful, especially if you think about Ai. That’s why Ai lived telling lies. Isn't Kamiki thinking about what's happened to her, then? By bringing that up? He should have felt it, loving/watching a person like her and what unfolded.. Ai died because of the truth that she had kids with him. Ugly fans like Ryosuke and Nino couldn't take her being less than perfect. Wouldn't this have hurt Kamiki too? The fact that they loved each other(At least Ai did genuinely, we know that) was unwanted. People could not accept that, and that's one of the reasons why they had to break up.

From the way Kamiki talks, it feels like he genuinely doesn’t want his son or daughter to go through that kind of pain.

I think Kamiki has a pretty good nature. When you look at how he speaks, it’s gentle, and he seems to genuinely care about Aqua and knows a lot about him. Maybe he’s been watching over him from afar for a long time? He probably even knows who his son has feelings for.

It really feels like Kamiki is trying to persuade him: "I’m fine with dying. But you, you have so many reasons to live, right? Shouldn’t you return to the people you care about?"

And, the way Kamiki reacts after Aqua stabs him also shows it. He’s visibly agitated afterward. His expression noticeably shifts to panic and darkness.

Wait... stop it, don’t do this! That’s what he says.

The way he’s talking to Aqua in that moment.

It’s not like, “How dare you?” but more like, “Aqua, please don’t do this.”

It really seems like he doesn’t want Aqua to die.

He’s really shocked by it.

From his expressions, he seems more shocked by Aqua getting stabbed than by his own fall, like he didn’t even know how to react properly. He's being grabbed onto but he isn't looking at the hands that are grabbing him, his line of sight is on Aqua there

The final expression he makes can seem really pathetic, but...

Oh man, I think that’s the truth of that situation.

And it makes sense because Ai dreamed of raising her kids with this guy. I think he could’ve been a really great father who adored his kids... at least until the point they separated. He was just really young back then.

Doesn’t this guy really love his kids? Even without the movie arc, there have been hints of his concern for them.

I’m not trying to interpret him kindly just because I particularly like or find this character attractive.

If he’s a serial killer psychopath, then yeah, he should die here. When I first got spoiled, my reaction was completely merciless. "Well, he should die if he's like that," I said. But...

I don’t think that’s the case. It really seems like he cares about Aqua.

Oh, and Kamiki’s soul being noble in the past is mentioned, right?

So, he was a good person before?

Well, I guess I wasn’t totally off in reading his character? LOL.

Does that mean he could be a fallen god?(could be a stretch, but there IS a lyric in fatal about fallenness!!!)

Sarutahiko is often described as a "noble" and "just" god, so it’s quite possible that Kamiki’s true nature is based on Sarutahiko, the husband of Ame-no-Uzume = Ai.

That couple was very affectionate, and according to the Aratate Shrine description, they even go as far as blessing marital relationships. Those gods really love each other. In that case, Ai being so fond and loving of Hikaru also makes sense. It could explain why she asked her kids to save him...

So, can't “Fatal” be his song? Maybe he’s fallen from grace?

The lyrics in "Fatal" say things like, "What should I use to fill in what’s missing?" Could that be about human lives? But did he really kill people? How can you save someone after that? That’s why I don’t think he went that far.

"Without you, I cannot live anymore"

“I would sacrifice anything for you”

This isn’t Aqua. This is Kamiki.

Would Aqua do that much for Ai? He shouldn’t be so blind.

When I listened to "Fatal," I immediately thought of "Mephisto" because the two songs are so similar in context.

They’re sung by the same narrator, aren’t they? That made it clear what Kamiki’s purpose was, which is why I started drawing so much about him and Ai after that.

He keeps saying he’ll give up his life and that he wants to see Ai again. This isn’t Aqua! These feelings are different from what Aqua has.

At first, I thought because Ruby = Amaterasu, with Tsukuyomi having shown up, and Aqua perhaps having relations to Susanoo (he’s falling into the sea this time, right? LOL) I wondered if Ai and her boyfriend’s story was based on the major myth of Izanagi and Izanami, since they’re so well-known.

That myth is famous for how the husband tries to save his wife after she dies, though he fails in the end.

The storyline is similar to Mephisto’s, so I thought, "Could this be it?"

And then I realized Sarutahiko and Ame-no-Uzume's lores also fit really well. Ai thinking Kamiki was like a jewel when they first met is similar to how Ame-no-Uzume saw Sarutahiko shining when they first met. Sarutahiko guiding Ame-no-Uzume is similar to how Hikaru taught Ai how to act. They even had descendants that have a title that means "maiden who's good at dancing" The two also fell for each other at first sight. The shrine the characters visit in the story is supposedly where those two met and married. If they REALLY are those gods in essence, It feels like something went wrong with the wish because one or both of them became twisted.

Anyway, I think Kamiki was originally noble but fell from grace, and it’s likely that Ai’s death was the catalyst.

But I’m not sure if he really went as far as killing people.

What is Tsukuyomi even talking about? I’ve read it several times, and I still don’t fully understand.

I really hope she's wrong because… killing others to make Ai’s name carry more weight? That doesn’t make any sense. What does “the weight of her name” supposed to mean?? I don't think that's something that should be taken just at face value, I feel like there's more behind this idea.

What kind of logic is that? And on top of that, I can’t understand why Ai’s life would become more valuable if Kamiki dies. It just doesn’t follow.

Why would he even say that?

He must be really confident... Does he think he’s someone greater than Ai?

Even so, how does it connect?

I read two books today, because I started wondering if my reading comprehension has dropped. Thankfully, I’m still able to read books just fine. It’s not like I can’t read, you know? I’ve taken media literacy classes and pride myself on not having terrible reading comprehension.

I tried to make sense of what exactly the heck this may mean, and I think.. if it were to mean something like, “I’ll offer my life as a sacrifice to Ai,” I’d at least get that. That kind of logic, in a way, has some practical meaning.

Kamiki talked about sacrifices? tributes? offerings? in chapter 147. I really remember certain scenes clearly because I’ve gone over them carefully. In that case, if Kamiki dies, then the weight or value of his life would transfer to Ai, and that would “help” her, right?

If the story is going in that direction,

when I look at “Mephisto” and “Fatal,” I can see that by doing this, Kamiki would have a chance to either save Ai or get closer to her. At least that makes some sense.

But is it really right for Ai to ask someone to save Kamiki, who killed others? As soon as the idea of it came up, I knew something was up.

Because of what Ai's wanted, I think it’s possible that Kamiki didn’t actually go that far. In the songs, they talk about gathering light and offering something, but they don’t say anything about killing people… Kamiki said he’d sacrifice his own life. People around him may have died, but…

Kamiki’s true personality doesn’t seem like the type to do that… And looking at his actions when Aqua was stabbed??

He hasn’t shown any direct actions yet, so I still don’t know how far he’d actually go.

It’s not that I don’t believe Tsukuyomi’s words entirely,

but I don’t think the conclusion is going to be something like, “Ai should’ve never met Kamiki.”

Every time we see Kamiki’s actual actions, there’s this strange gentleness to him, and that’s what’s confusing me.

The more I look closely, the weirder it feels, and something about it just bothers me. If Kamiki were truly just a completely crazy villain, I’d think, “Oh, so that’s who he is,” and I wouldn’t deny it.

But each time, I start thinking that maybe Ai didn’t meet someone so strange after all? Ai liked him that much, so on that front, it makes sense to me. I want to believe that’s the right conclusion. I mean, doesn’t what he says sound kind? Isn’t he gentle?

No, but seriously, when Kamiki listened to Aqua’s reasons for wanting to live, I thought his expression was warm. It didn’t seem like some calculated expression like “according to plan” like Light Yagami. It felt more like a fond, affectionate expression. I draw too, you know. I pay a lot of attention to expressions. This character often makes expressions that really stand out.

It’s like he’s genuinely trying to convince Aqua not to do anything reckless. Maybe I’m being soft on Kamiki because he’s Ai’s boyfriend? But actually, it’s not like that?

I mean, I’m the type who’s like, “Anyone who did something bad to Ai should die!!” It’s because he’s a character. If this were a real person, I wouldn’t so casually tell someone to go die or say such strong things.

But… he seems like a good person.

+It’s a small thing, but why did Kamiki drop his phone while talking about Ruby? Ppft If you drop it from that height, it’d probably crack. Was he trying to look cool? (It’s an Apple phone, huh.) Is he a bit clumsy? Well... since it looks like him and Aqua are about to fall into the sea, maybe it was a blessing he did so. The phone might be saved after all. If he manages to climb out of there, he could contact someone with that phone.

[yuseirra]

あなたがいないと生きていけない 何もかも捧げてしまってもいい あなたの愛がまだ足らない 欠けたものは何で埋めたらいい？

You know, I just had the weirdest idea ever,

I've noticed how the song "Mephisto" and the new op "Fatale" has lyrics like:

If life returns to you, if it reaches you, ah I don't care what happens to me Ah, but not every wish will be fulfilled And if that’s not realized, I shall become you The stars shatter and shine(Mephisto)

I can't live without you I could give you everything Your love is still not enough What can I make up for what's missing(Fatale)

What if this is written from Kamiki's perspective? I wondered just what importance the gods have in this story, they're implied to have a role but they haven't really been doing much... what if Kamiki had this wish to revive Ai, and is murdering other stars as sacrifices to the gods in order to make that a reality? I honestly don't think he'd have intended for Ai's death at this point, from the stuff I've seen, she was sort of his everything and she probably is still. It wouldn't be a surprise if he feels like that. I still have to learn more about this character to talk about him better, and I might be making a fool of myself but I'm free to make all the wrong guesses now lol

If this is the case, he'd sort of be like a more extreme version of Aqua(since mephisto and fatale seems to be written from aqua's perspective as well) Aqua thinks he's done the unforgivable but well...now there's someone who ACTUALLY went too far.

I know this seems cheesy but I just..can't see how the gods will be tied into the story. They're mentioned time to time but what are they even up to? The manga is ending and they'll never be acknowledged at this rate, why are they even mentioned then? I bet they do have something to do with Kamiki and his motives, he did say he had something to do...

[yuseirra]

Analysis on Kamiki

Organized further notes on the Ame-no-Uzume and Sarutahiko myth

Happy new year! I brought something new(yet again) on this guy... as first thing of the year, wow. Something about him really bugs me I guess. But I came up with something that can explain what he is and I've been expressing a lot about that. I have to understand what the subject is before I could build something upon it and create fanwork so, please take these as a struggle to do it o<-<

From what I've concluded, he's a character that definitely cannot be understood fully without understanding Japanese mythology. It's been fun doing some research about it and since I'm not an expert and it's all self-conducted, I can be off, but I think I've done all right. I've done cross-checks and looked into multiple resources, official documents, and websites so; I did a lot; to make sense of something that doesn't seem to.

well, here goes!: If you like the character or seek a better understanding of him, I think this may help!

Doesn't it feel like something about how things unfold around Kamiki is deeply unusual?

The people who make his life difficult—or maybe it's more accurate to say those who hurt him—seem to either die or end up miserable. But it’s unclear whether this is something within Kamiki’s control or if it happens regardless of his intent. There’s no clear cause-and-effect relationship. Moreover, people around him, including the protagonist, seem to become extreme in their behavior. Even Nino didn’t seem to be in her right mind—almost as though she were possessed. She doesn't seem sane.

Kamiki himself, however, behaves relatively normally: he warns Yura to watch her step, urges Nino to turn herself in, asks Ryosuke to deliver flowers, cries to Uehara about what happened to him, and tells Aqua to go back and live a normal life. But the outcomes of these actions spiral into bizarre consequences: Yura dies, Nino tries to stab Ruby, Ryosuke harms Ai, Uehara ends up in a murder-suicide with his wife, and Aqua decides to drown Kamiki along with himself, culminating in that tragic ending.

To me, the only person who seemed relatively unaffected while staying by Kamiki's side was Ai. The two of them appeared genuinely happy together, which might explain why Kamiki struggles to let go of her. Maybe it’s because he was truly happy during that time. When Ai was with him, he believed he could overcome anything. But even their relationship took an unexpected turn when the twins were conceived, and they eventually separated.

Sarutahiko, the husband of Ame-no-Uzume (the goddess of entertainment), is described as “a god who guides everything toward goodness.” This is how a shrine dedicated to the two deities refers to him. When I read that, I felt like there was something significant about it.

If such a god operates this way, wouldn’t it stand to reason that if the god fell into corruption or was broken, they’d become the opposite—a god who guides everything toward evil?

Something about Kamiki is genuinely strange. Can his actions be interpreted as intentional? If so, when did it start? From what point?; Yet, it seems like he possesses some kind of ability to guide or lead others in a particular direction—without physically doing anything himself. This would explain why he can claim, “I didn’t do anything.”

From the songs, it seems Kamiki didn’t realize he's capable of doing this before Ai’s death. There are two songs about wanting to meet or revive the dead. In “Mephisto,” the narrator claims to have forgotten who they are, and I think this narrator is Kamiki. This isn’t Aqua, as Aqua knows exactly who he is—a reincarnated person—and struggles to live as just Aqua the boy. On the other hand, Kamiki seems to have been something else without realizing it until later.

Both “Fatal” and “Mephisto” appear to be Kamiki’s songs. They likely symbolize Kamiki’s realization that he is Sarutahiko, the god of light and guidance, and that Ai was once his partner when he was in his divine form. The lyrics suggest he’ll do whatever it takes to bring Ai back, even sacrificing his own life. This aligns with Kamiki’s lines and motivations, which differ from Aqua, who expresses a desire to live.

As for Kamiki’s claim about sending flowers, I don’t think he was lying. The events in chapter 154 were too strange, leading me to suspect from the beginning that his intention was simply to send flowers and that things spiraled out of control from there. Chapter 160 confirms this idea—the explanation aligns well with his character and prior context. When considering Kamiki, Nino, and Ryosuke’s mutual acquaintance, it makes no sense for Kamiki to ask Ryosuke to threaten Ai. He's the boyfriend of a member of her idol group, who is also a fan of Ai. Why choose someone with that sort of connection to go and attack Ai? Could he have suspected such a thing? Instead, I believe Kamiki trusted Ryosuke enough to make such a request, after having befriended him for a few years, expecting him to deliver the flowers as intended.

Kamiki’s innate nature seems to be gentle and kind, but excessively naive. He tends to believe others’ words at face value, struggles to discern good from evil, and harbors a desire to do what’s “right” or “approved by others.” However, due to the lack of proper guidance, his judgment is severely flawed. Ai seemed to recognize this and often acted as his advocate, standing up for him.

Statements like “Carry the burden of the dead” and “You are empty, so no one will ever love you” were internalized by Kamiki without question. His problem isn’t malice—it’s excessive naivety and emptiness, combined with a tendency to trust others too readily. When things go wrong, he blames himself and spirals into self-punishment.

To me, it seems that he truly blamed himself for the issues he caused when he parted ways with Ai and tortured himself over it. Afterward, due to his timid nature, it makes sense that he only tried to send flowers. That’s the most natural progression, given his personality, which is why I can’t believe that he ever intended to harm Ai.

If he really is the incarnation of the god who was the husband of Ame-no-Uzume, then he is the god of guiding paths and should be a god who leads others, right? He’s supposed to push people toward good decisions or guide them to a “better future.”

However, the environment he grew up in wasn’t good, so he probably didn’t know what the “right path” was. That’s where the confusion started. This is why Ai’s request regarding him strikes significant: if Kamiki ever lost his way, she wanted him to find it together with her and her kids. Ai had, to some extent, played the role of his guide, as there were no proper adults around Kamiki. But Ai also had a lot on her plate to handle, and she ultimately judged that it would be better to leave him to reduce his burden, so she parted ways. In the end, Kamiki—still lost and unable to recover as a god of guidance who had lost his way—spiraled after Uehara’s death and fell into despair, becoming corrupted and unable to recover. From that point on, it seems that he started to twist the fates of those around him.

I think much of this happened as a passive. His small actions seem to have caused butterfly effects, continuously leading everything in unhappy, extreme, and strange directions. People who got involved with him ended up becoming unfortunate. That's because he's the god of guidance that deals with people's futures, but is severely flawed.

He likely didn’t realize until Ai’s death what kind of power he had, but at some point afterward, he became aware and probably started using the “black star” consciously. The charisma to sway others or the ability to deceive them may be an expression of the power of Sarutahiko, the god he incarnates. It seems he shared that power with his children. The ability to influence others aligns strongly with the god’s ability to lead people’s futures. The power of love represented by the “white star” comes from Ai. The god who loves humans unconditionally is Ame-no-Uzume—Ai—and the god who loves absurdity and irrationality is Sarutahiko—Kamiki.

Tsukuyomi says the entertainment world isn’t her domain, and in Shinto, the gods of entertainment are the couple Ame-no-Uzume and Sarutahiko. The Aratate Shrine that appears in the story worships these two gods together, granting wishes. Kamiki talks about wishes several times, and that’s because he’s been fulfilling them himself. But as I said earlier, because he’s not in a good state, it’s like a monkey’s paw—people get what they wish for, but in a twisted way.

It must be true that he has paternal love. He was likely helping his children in his own way, but his self-loathing and guilt over Ai’s death kept him from stepping forward to meet them. In the end, doesn’t he go to see them? That’s probably because his goal was nearly achieved, and he planned to die soon. Before that, he might’ve wanted to grant each of the twins their wishes once. That's what he does when he meets them, he mentions wishes and bids them luck. Why else would he have gone to see them? He didn’t have to. And yet, he encouraged them. He was kind, wasn’t he? Did he try to kill Ruby? I don’t know... omg. Well, about that, he neither confirmed nor denied it. Apart from that eerie smile from hell, maybe he considered it, but in the end, he didn’t do it, right?

As for whether he used his ability to manipulate Nino to try into harming Ruby (but then, would he have calmly watched her performance?? That doesn’t make sense. If he had intended to harm Ruby in such a way, he wouldn’t have watched her performance so intently. He would’ve thought something went wrong and executed a backup plan or something. And would he have told Aqua to continue watching Ruby’s idol journey if he planned to kill her??); or if he genuinely meant it when he told Nino that they should stop and was sincerely planning to die or turn himself in, only for his powers to unintentionally cause something similar to what happened to Ai... I actually think it’s the latter. Logically, the latter aligns more with his previous statements and actions.

Seeing this situation unfold, Aqua likely concluded that no matter Kamiki’s intentions, the only way to protect “Ruby’s future” was to eliminate him quickly. That’s why Aqua made such an extreme choice.

Kamiki seems to be a kind of calamity just by being alive. He has the ability to influence the future, but it seems to push people in an unfavorable direction. In Mephisto, it felt like he wasn’t aware of this aspect of himself, but by Fatal, with all the talk of "corruption" and "stars," it seems he had become conscious of it. Comparing the two songs (Mephisto → Fatal), you can see how the emotional tone grows increasingly extreme and unhinged. Both songs express genuine sadness and longing, but the way those feelings are enveloped shifts. By Fatal, it’s as if he’s reached a point where he can’t see anything clearly anymore.

From that point—or possibly earlier—it seems like Kamiki became the kind of person who could commit countless transgressions just to see Ai again, using his abilities while minimizing his own accountability. That’s likely why Aqua calls him selfish and despicable: because his actions stem from his desire to see Ai. Kamiki himself acknowledges his sins, so this interpretation seems accurate.

But if he does possess this ability, it’s hard to tell how much of the outcomes fall within the scope of his intentions. It doesn’t seem like he wants to kill people—it feels more like an unintended consequence. For instance, the deaths of others don’t seem to be something he wished for, as he continually blames himself, saying, "It’s my fault, it’s my fault." It seems like the process goes: he wants to feel closer to Ai → he retrieves the light (star) associated with Ai → those who possess that light end up dying. This chain of events is likely why these tragedies keep happening, and why he has to pay the price for his actions.

Is he evil? If you look at the results, he certainly appears extremely so. But if we’re talking about his nature… it feels like his state deteriorated to the point where, had someone helped him regain clarity, this outcome might have been avoided. And the only person in the world who could have helped him was Ai. That’s why he continues to search for her.

If Kamiki really is a god, Ai would indeed be his one and only precious partner. They were originally meant to function together. Even if we leave that aside, it doesn’t seem like there was anyone else who treated him properly. That’s why he longs for Ai.

Looking at his interactions with Aqua, it seems that what happened between Kamiki and Aqua was the result of Kamiki interpreting Aqua’s wish and making it come true. Aqua wished to take revenge on him, and as a result, Kamiki was completely destroyed socially. But the process was so devastatingly catastrophic that even Kamiki himself was taken aback, pleading, "Don’t do this." It feels like he was betrayed by the very wish he granted.

As for Ruby, I believe Kamiki also granted her wish, but the way it manifested was horribly twisted. She doesn’t seem happy. Her beloved brother died, and yet she shines brighter than anyone by hiding the truth. Is that happiness? Perhaps. But Ruby once said she wouldn’t become like her mother. So, like Aqua’s wish, Ruby’s wish seems to have been granted in a way that was fundamentally flawed. If you look at the lyrics of Fatal, this "lack of Ai" appears to be the key flaw. Without Ai, Kamiki was fundamentally incapable of recovery. But since he believes Ai died because of him, he can’t stop.

The events of Chapter 160 should reflect the truth. When I picked up and became more invested in reading this story back in Chapter 154, I thought, "Something feels off here." Chapter 160 finally addressed that. I believe it’s accurate.

That’s why Ai thought she and her children had to help Kamiki. He didn’t end up in this state by his own will. However, Aqua, after witnessing Kamiki’s collapse and the ripple effects it had on Ruby, judged him to be beyond salvation. Aqua likely concluded, "He has to die; it’s the only way," and acted accordingly.

This might very well have been the "right" decision. Kamiki’s powers seem uncontrollable. A mad god wandering around wreaking havoc can’t be allowed to continue. Perhaps if Ai could return and reassure him—Hey, calm down, I’m alive—it could have resolved things. But by now, he’s committed so many sins that it might truly be too late.

So, if we retrace things, where could we turn back the clock to make everyone happy?

Ai and Kamiki, in my opinion, could have been a happy couple. If they had simply been left alone to live happily, this could have all been avoided.

It feels like the gods came to the human world, suffered greatly, and broke apart. One of them partially recovered, only to die, while the other went mad in the aftermath.

And this manga… if so, essentially tears apart a real-life divine couple that’s known for living happily together. Lol, maybe those gods cursed this comic for having caused them this because I can't picture an ending like this getting an overall pleasant reception...some people may like it, but I don't think the general consensus would be so; I don't like it so much either. The only way I believe it can come together somewhat is through reading over the myths with some extensive research but that's not really something that's explained within the manga itself, thus it can't really be confirmed unless the artists tell so;

Anyhow, the author seems to have a deep appreciation for mythology, in my opinion.

When I first came across Fatal, I felt that the existing narrative hinted at some connections to mythology, so I started delving into the myths surrounding the deities Amaterasu and Ame-no-Uzume that were mentioned in the story.

The narrative between Ai and Kamiki appears, at least to me, to be a modern reinterpretation of how Ame-no-Uzume and Sarutahiko came to meet. As I dug deeper, Kamiki started to align with Sarutahiko in so many ways that it felt implausible to dismiss the connection. Although there aren’t vast records or details on the myth, I managed to find translations of the relevant sections, particularly in the Nihon Shoki.

In the myth, Amaterasu sends her descendant Ninigi down to Earth, and the goddess entertainment, of the performing arts, Ame-no-Uzume, assists him. Upon surveying the land, Ame-no-Uzume spots Sarutahiko, who is shining brilliantly. She approaches him and persuades him to guide her, and Sarutahiko agrees. (Initially, he was obstructing the path because if he agreed to guide them, it meant ceding part of his territory and potentially his position as the sun deity to Amaterasu.) The two fall in love, and he eventually relents.

Doesn't this parallel how Ai thought Kamiki was "like a jewel" when she first saw him? His name is also associated with light, and he ends up guiding Ai—helping her learn acting and supporting her growth. At that time, Kamiki still had the white star, representing his role as a god of righteousness, guiding Ai away from her self-destructive tendencies.

Additionally, in the myth, Ame-no-Uzume serves Sarutahiko a meal to thank him for guiding her (and Amaterasu's grandson). Doesn't this echo the moment when Ai treated Kamiki to a meal as thanks for teaching her acting?

Their relationship grows so deep that Amaterasu’s grandson essentially acts as a matchmaker, and Ame-no-Uzume takes Sarutahiko’s name, leaving the heavens to settle with him on Earth.

Ame-no-Uzume is a celestial deity, while Sarutahiko is an earthly one. Here’s where I started to sense the underlying theme: they belong to different realms. If Ai is a star and Kamiki is a jewel, then even if they are both deities, their origins differ. When they separate, they can't meet again because their realms don’t overlap. Ai ascended to the heavens, and Kamiki, unable to become a star himself, began searching for her out of longing.

In the myth, Ame-no-Uzume and Sarutahiko seem to have connected almost instantly—there are even implications that their bond was formed through physical intimacy right from the start. (This is hinted at in the myth, apparently.) They say they didn’t have an official marriage ceremony, but people generally regard them as married. I found this curious—why not simply state that they were officially wed? And even this mirrors how Ai and Kamiki almost got married but didn’t? Their stories overlap significantly in so many ways, almost too much to be a coincidence.

The descendants of Ame-no-Uzume and Sarutahiko are known for their exceptional dancing skills, a dance for the gods, the Kagura. Doesn’t that remind you of Ruby?

So, as I pieced these parallels together, I was like, “Oh, wow!” And then chapter 162 happened, and I was completely thrown off, thinking, “What is going on with this plot?” Interestingly, Sarutahiko is also associated with misogi—a purification ritual involving water. I remember speculating at some point that Kamiki should just be pushed into water, that he seems really cursed, and later, I found out that there’s a legend about Sarutahiko drowning. That’s when I thought, “This has to be it. This must be the reason the story is unfolding this way.”

If Kamiki truly represents this deity, then he must be a god of virtue who became corrupted. Originally, Sarutahiko is a god who guides people toward the right path, which means he must have been incredibly benevolent by nature.

But Sarutahiko also has a dual nature! He’s said to be the model for the tengu, a Japanese mythical creature known for being either extremely malevolent or extraordinarily kind. This duality makes everything click perfectly!

Honestly, it’s all incredibly fascinating. This part of the story was really fun to piece together.

Ame-no-Uzume and Sarutahiko seemed to have an incredibly harmonious relationship. People even created masks of these two gods to use in festivals, and they would visit shrines dedicated to them to receive blessings for marriage or to hold wedding ceremonies. They also pray for good fortune in love there. Since the two gods are connected to the entertainment industry (though Sarutahiko’s original domain wasn’t entertainment—it seems like he helps out because it’s his wife’s work), they take care of entertainers. As mentioned earlier, they also have the ability to grant wishes together. It seems that this ability only manifests when the two are together.

Also, wasn’t it mentioned that Kamiki’s soul was noble? Sarutahiko is a god with a noble soul. Like many gods associated with light, he is described as just and virtuous. So, is it really entirely his fault that he ended up in such a state? If Ai were still alive, I feel like he never would’ve fallen so far. And if it turns out that he wasn’t even trying to kill Ai—something I genuinely believe—wouldn’t it make the story much clearer if they explicitly addressed that?

If the story is indeed borrowing from mythology, then there should be a message or some thematic consistency, but it feels incomplete or ambiguous, which is frustrating.

I started researching because certain aspects of Kamiki’s characterization felt off to me, and that led me down this path. If this was intentional on the creators’ part, then it’s quite impressive. But why aren’t they clarifying it? Most readers aren’t going to put in this much effort to analyze the story. So, is this not something they considered important? Or am I just overthinking? Still, without interpreting the story this way, I think there are logical gaps that can’t be explained otherwise. That’s why I can’t tie this story together in my mind—it just doesn’t sit right with me.

At the very least, by the end of the story, we need to understand what it’s trying to say. Without that clarity, it’s hard to feel satisfied. Right now, it feels seriously vague, and many people don’t understand it. If that’s the case, it means the story isn’t fully functioning as a narrative.

I don’t think Kamiki being portrayed as an outright villain would make for a good story. The work has already painted his character in shades of ambiguity. If they frame his actions as being motivated by anger over being rejected by Ai, and if that led him to harm her, it wouldn’t be a very meaningful story, in my opinion. Moreover, the flow of the narrative already feels strange. It’s not that I can’t accept that people are capable of such actions, but something about this character doesn’t feel like he would act that way. I had someone address, “Even if Kamiki hurt Ai, why can’t you still support their relationship?” Well, sure, that might be possible, but…hey, the thing is, I don’t think that was actually the case here. It’s not because I want to justify their relationship that I'm denying what's obvious—from what I make out from having read the story, I don’t even think he harmed her in the first place, which is why it feels off, and made me look deeper into it. If I believed he had hurt her, I wouldn’t support it. I'm not saying people can't do it, I wouldn't have been so passionate about them, that's all.

Until chapter 154, I had never once drawn that couple—I was just observing. I never expected to get so deeply into this or to end up saying so much about it… sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t have picked up this story—it’s led me down such a challenging path, goodness!! In the end, it’s still unclear, right? Why is that? Why would that be so? Why did they have Kamiki say at the end, “I only intended to send flowers”? I genuinely believe that’s true. That's what I made out of his character even before that was actually addressed in the story! I KNEW it had to happen because that's how he would have acted, according to how he's been depicted!! Based on his personality as depicted in the story, he doesn’t seem like the type to hire someone like Ryosuke to intimidate Ai or harm her. That’s just not how the character was written. There’s no need to portray him that way! So why did they? When you apply the mythology, everything fits together so well, which is why I kept looking into it. But the creators have left it vague and unresolved, making it really frustrating.

I think I'll be able to send them off properly.. have a closure myself after I complete the story I've been writing for these two characters! As much as I like both characters, they've been making me feel so anxious because it was so hard to make a judgment due to the ambiguity. But even though I’ve been filled with anxiety, the reason I kept drawing those two characters was that, in my own way, I had some basis and intuition for doing so.

That is all~ see you all with another comic strip soon, happy new year! :)

[yuseirra]

Okay so I read onk ch 154 and kamiki literally SAYS Ai was the girl he was willing to sacrifice his own life for. The phrasing is EXACTLY like that. That really lines up with what's being mentioned in Mephisto and Fatal about giving lives and all. Those must be HIS songs and I'm getting this idea that he still means what he says

Because, just when would he have thought about having to "sacrifice" his life for Ai? I don't think thoughts like that would've crossed his mind in the past when they were still young and together, there wasn't a need for something as "dire" as sacrifices then. It must be something that's came after

When they were dating, Ai was the one that was older and SHE was the one who's protected HIM. It looks like she was the one who had more control over the relationship too. She was the one who's probably made the sacrifices(with the breakup being one too, from her point of view) so what circumstance brought kamiki to say he was willing to do that for her? (Though, I get how he'd be like he'd be able to give anything for Ai, it can be inferred that he was that attached to her) I'm sticking with my earlier guesses that he's actually doing that now and it has something to do with the gods (his name IS KAMIki + hikaru(light), right?)

Even Aqua's never said he'd give his life away FOR Ai's, did he? For her cause, and revenge, maybe, but Ai's already someone who's passed. I think the songs are really onto something. They sound too.. strong.. And a bit murky for it to be entirely from Aqua's perspective. It's going in even further than what's normally considered healthy, aren't they? It's about someone who's hopelessly lost and seeking for love. That's how Ai thought Kamiki was like too, she thought he was lost and needs saving.

Fatal's lyrics are too close to this guy's mental state, I just can't unsee it, seeing that new chapter having the same kind of stuff the lyrics are saying!! Makes me go this has to be it!! I think this should be it!! He's ACTUALLY thought about giving his own life for Ai at some point confirmed!! So shouldn't there be some things that leads up to/stems out from it?

I might embarrass myself later with these theories I'm throwing out later but I gotta say.. Try listening to Fatal and Mephisto picturing it's kamiki that's singing it, it clicks.

[yuseirra]

This manga is truly the epitome of avoidant disaster (Hoshino family analysis)

Yeah... Jotted this down earlier this morning :/ it's been machine-translated so if the writing feels off in some parts, it could be because of that!

After everything, my personal impression of the original manga is that it hurls misfortunes at its characters without resolving, healing, or addressing any of them. Everyone just seems to endure, carrying their festering wounds for years while pretending they’re fine, hiding them, burying them, or even living submerged in them. No one truly confronts their pain or thinks about what to do with it.

Aqua says he’s seeking revenge, but it’s not what he truly wants. He’s suppressing his inner wounds, telling himself it will all be over once he avenges Ai, and that he’ll die afterward. Then he claims it’s all for Ruby, but to me, that feels like rationalization. What Aqua really wanted was to live happily. He kept avoiding his genuine desires.

Ruby said she was chasing her dreams and seemed to be thriving, but in the end, she also turned into an avoidant type.

Ai… she tried so hard, but her basic attachment style leans avoidant. Ai really lived her life with all her might, didn’t she? Yet, as an idealist who wanted so much, she often compromised to make those around her happy. It seems like she always held herself back, standing a step or two away from what could have made her truly happy. She kept postponing things. She would have been happiest if she revealed her truth, but the reality was that the world wouldn’t have accepted it. That’s undeniable.

I think Ai genuinely loved her boyfriend and wanted to convey her feelings to him, but was there just too much to lose if she did? It’s such a classic avoidant way to end things—truly loving someone but cutting them off abruptly, without properly explaining anything, coming to conclusions on her own, and distancing herself. Aqua, it turns out, inherited this unfavorable trait from his mother.

Still… I think if Ai had survived, she would have eventually made a revelation, created a documentary, or told her story. She seemed to be enduring to her limit. If the kids had grown older and more time had passed, or if Kamiki had just gone to see the kids when he got that call instead of sending flowers, I feel like things could have worked out. But instead, he didn’t go, and tragedy struck, leaving everyone miserable. If he had just gone to see them? Everything might have turned out okay. Or if it had happened earlier, while Ai was still in the hospital.

Kamiki… sigh. There’s so little revealed about him, but among the family, he seems to have become the most honest about his desires. However, that doesn't come from his right state of mind... From my perspective, this character completely lost his mind after Ai died. He seems to be in such anguish. Honestly, I think he was as good as dead the moment Ai passed away. His despair feels like something out of Mephisto or Fatal. If Aqua were to turn out to be the one who's, responsible for those songs, the writer is crazy!! I would truly curse them. You just can’t write the story that way. It would invalidate Kana, Akane, and Ruby all at once. That would be horrifying. It would mean Aqua spent the entire series forming connections and relationships with others while secretly being obsessed with Ai. But to Ai, Aqua is her child. If that’s the conclusion, it would feel so wrong. But when you consider Kamiki’s devotion, his emptiness, his corruption—it fits him more than anyone else. Yeah, those songs are his all right.

Returning to Kamiki… he seems to be in terrible shape. His current form feels like fragments barely clinging to the shell of his former self. If Aqua is rotting from within, Kamiki feels like a hollowed-out specter, a human husk that’s already crumbled. He seems to have kept living purely out of some stubborn resolve. And what remained for him? His desire to meet Ai or the urge to bring her back to life. It seems like that was all he had left, and he abandoned everything else, deeming it unnecessary. His state feels beyond avoidant; it’s like he’s become a ghost.

Was this truly the same person who spent time with Ai? He’s so hollow now. How does someone end up like this?

In any case, none of the characters fully addressed their wounds or healed. Ai had plans to confront hers, but the writer killed her off before she could. She should have gone to her boyfriend and had a proper conversation. The video was a plan, but she was planning to confess her love and delay it for 15 years? While having such a huge regret that'd remain for so long. Surely Kamiki wouldn’t have completely misunderstood, would he? He wasn’t a bad person—if anything, he was the kind of person who could help Ai grow.

When a friend said this manga was about everyone being avoidant, I didn’t quite get it, but now it hits home. Everyone keeps burying their true feelings, convincing themselves they want something else, and spiraling endlessly. And in the end, they just keep doing that. The characters started with avoidance and never truly faced their real wishes.

Kamiki is the only one tied so deeply to making and granting wishes. He must be the one who granted those in the story. And yet, because no one expressed their true desires, Kamiki ended up fulfilling all the wrong ones.

That’s why no one’s wishes came true. Even Ruby’s wish feels deceptive—it can’t be considered truly resolved.

Still, Ai had some potential. As for Kamiki... if what he testified about himself is true (and it probably is), then rather than being avoidant, I think the fact that he was abused and became passive was the root cause of many things. Looking at him consistently, he didn’t take much action. And when he did, it often led to bad outcomes. If we’re asking when he started to change or began manipulating people, I think it happened after Ai died. He became her mentor because he was asked to. Ai was the one who stepped up to protect him, and when he tried to sever ties with his abuser, he ended up being gaslit. He froze up.

He’s the type of person who’d hesitate to visit Ai in person the way he's described it as, that's why I don't think he lied in 160. His cautious nature seems to be part of his core personality. When Ai needs something, she’d step up, while he seems more introverted. The idea that he deliberately avoided her or schemed to harm her doesn’t sit right with me. It’s still ambiguous, but judging by how much he liked Ai, it feels like he was afraid she’d reject him, so he hesitated.

But after Ai’s death, it seems like he awakened to something… maybe this just became his behavioral pattern. He’s not someone who actively takes charge, but it feels like he learned to make use of others to achieve his goals. And all of those goals revolved around Ai. It seems like he wanted to keep delivering something to her. Thinking about it, he probably became this way because he didn’t visit her back then, and then after that, he could never see her again even if he wanted to. That longing must have consumed him. So, he really might have been the ultimate avoidant personality.

Wow… this entire family is just ridiculously avoidant.

Still, Kamiki seems like he’s charging straight toward what he wants with no hesitation after losing his mind. The problem is, what he wants no longer exists in this world. Judging by his actions, if Ai were still alive, he might have shrunk back again, been scared, dug himself into a hole, and avoided everything. But because there’s no chance of meeting her now, he’s become reckless.

Everyone should have gone to therapy together... seriously.

LOL. Ah… well, life is short. I hope everyone manages to achieve and get what they want! Fighting!! ♥ This might actually be a very educational manga... though it’s pretty brutal.

The author might be avoidant too, judging by the themes in their work. No offense, but that’s just what I’m thinking. Everyone in the story just circles around what they want without ever actually getting it. The only exception might be Kamiki, who became a little more honest about his desires after going insane, and Ai… if this were another story, maybe she would’ve achieved what she wanted. But this story is so frustrating and harsh. It’s cruel... Who should we even blame? (The writer...yeah. Has to be the writing)