#fanfiction culture annoys me to no end too.

[princessofangiemania]

𝑺𝒖𝒄𝒄𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝑺𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒚: 𝑰 𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒊𝒇𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝑺𝑷 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒂 𝑾𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒑𝒂𝒅-𝒆𝒔𝒒𝒖𝒆 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒚

First and foremost, I would like to apologise for my inactivity ;w; I've been so focused on school, it was HECTIC and boy do I have a lot of success stories, this being one of them. So start of the school year, I wasn't planning on manifesting a boyfriend. I just wanted good grades, beauty and stuff. Long yapping session ahead!!

I was friends with this guy. Our whole friendship started because I was bored and wanted to play cupid (He liked another girl). So I was talking with him a lot, I was his right-hand woman. But this guy, he's not fond of making first moves but the girl isn't either. Long story short, he got rejected they didn't end up together. Let's call my SP "Coco" for good measure. You thought that was the end of it and we just remained friends? Wrong, I started developing feelings for him and womp womp (I actually thought he was physically attractive when I first saw him but backed off when I saw he liked another girl because I wasn't that attached yet). An even funnier story, we're in a four-person friend group. (2 boys and 2 girls), the other two are a couple. So our friend-group was more like a double date if we did end up together. Since my 18th birthday party was coming up, I had to pick a partner for the cotilion. And I picked him (He was convinced) and I even proposed a solo. So while we were practicing, we had lots of moments and I'm pretty clumsy, you can pretty much imagine that. There came our field trip. And it was mostly water sports. After that, we were all given free time to play in the pool for about two hours. I began carrying people randomly and they started doing the same to me. I actually carried Coco too and of course he carried me too. Around dismissal, I switched places with the other guy in our friend group and sat next to him. Average romance anime cliche moment, I fell asleep on his shoulder. To fast forward through, I confessed to him but he gave me a "You deserve better, I love you as a friend" but not a definite no. The rejection is implied but what does our LOA Barbie girlie do? We persist. That time wasn't the best, I was more than awkward around him but all I thought was, "This is for the plot" over and over again.

Like a Wattpad love story, it started picking up on the day of my 18th birthday, when we sang Photograph. Not relevant? It played our part in 18 Roses (In Philippine culture, it is customary for a girl to dance with 18 bachelors to signify her coming of age). And of course, I just had to experience all the cliche moments like him holding an umbrella over me, carrying my bag, going to get ice cream, walking somewhere and exchanging longing glances when the other wasn't looking and it all came down to a pool party we had when the school year ended. I got drunk (My dumbass thought the punch was orange juice and filled my cup all the way through) and I was just mostly chilling by the jacuzzi because of it. Coco over here, if we weren't hogging the karaoke machine, we were just chilling in the jacuzzi by ourselves (And the annoying pick-me girl of the class occasionally) and when I got too drunk, apparently I asked if I could hug him and for the last 2 hours or so, I was just hugging him. It was weird because Coco would usually join water sports going on in the other pool but he decided to just chill with me.

Before we got together, just like how I would write a wattpad fanfiction, there was the mandatory angst misunderstanding. The confession was really something. Sparks Fly by Taylor Swift was playing in the background and we became an official couple at exactly 12 midnight. Now, we're in a happy and loving relationship! Honestly, I was scared of what he'd be like in a relationship (Cuz I thought he wouldn't give me what I needed, E.G. princess treatment) but since I persisted and said to myself that what I wanted would always be given to me, I'm proud to say I'm dating a guy who practically worships the ground I walk on, not afraid to show his affection and respectful. I could go on and on about how good my relationship is how he treats me so well but I'd save you all the sappy stuff.

[elizabethminkel]

hi i read your article on fanfiction culture changing and it reminded me of a comment i got on a fic in 2023. (i was going to say this year/recently but then i checked and wow time moves fast) it was phrased like i wasn't ever going to see it. which is weird bc there were only 2 other comments both of which i'd responded to. it was written almost to an audience that did not include me. idk what that says about the "culture" but i enjoyed your article!

Aw <3 thank you so much! (If anyone hasn't read it yet, this is in reference to "The Endless Appetite for Fanfiction.")

That's super interesting, and definitely relates to this broader ~thing~ imo. My first thought is about the (significant?) rise in people putting fic reviews on Goodreads. That's definitely part of the overall context collapse—and deeply annoys me!!—but it does make me think about the concrit conversation, and how fandom post-LJ has largely shut down critical discussion of fic, which was not a rarity back in the day. (I'm not opening that can of worms now lol.) Like, I have sympathy for the Discord fic book clubs, because you should be allowed to say whatever you want about a fic in private! But I feel like that needs to be just one component, especially if you have a lot of positive things to say about a work.

Funnily, I got a comment somewhat recently that felt, at least in one bit, like it was addressed more to the world than to me. It was a really nice comment! But I showed it to a friend in my confusion (and then just replied like it hadn't struck me as odd). I've also received comments in the last few years on older stories in which the commenter acts like I've long departed from my fandom—when I've published new works as recently as a few weeks prior, and post on my (linked from my AO3 profile) tumblr daily. Which seems related, too—like, me, the fan, is still right there, very easy to see?

I do think there's something to be said about depersonalization across social media, and the way people collapse "content creators" with their "content" (to be clear, I'm not calling fic writers or fic either of these things, but part of this whole situation is that a lot of readers are thinking of them that way). Like, the creator economy is structured to encourage people do that, even. And of course there's great commentary here on tumblr dot com and elsewhere about how people talk to strangers in ways they'd never dare to in real life. I mean, the digital disconnect led to plenty of...issues...back in the day, even when fandom and fanfic weren't as bifurcated as right now.

Anyway, I think this is all swirling together...and like, it's not great! (Haha this is like how I ended the article. "This sucks! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯") But thanks again for your message—this topic has so many interesting, if depressing, facets!!

[luvnami]

shinazugawa sanemi is NOT the love interest of my dream office romcom! - chapter 4 (tell me)

an | notes at the end. likes/rbs/comments appreciated <3 find the masterlist here cw/wc | lovesick fools, mdni (18+), 2.2k+

It’s Saturday and you’re on an economy flight to Okinawa. Out of context, it seems like a dream. Sandy beaches, cultural heritage sites, black sugar desserts… You’d be ten times, no, a thousand times more excited if you weren’t sitting next to your boss. 

Shinazugawa sits strapped into his seat, his legs cast wide open and bumping into your knee. You have to shimmy to the other end of your seat so that you can avoid touching him. Unfortunately, Shinazugawa takes it as an invitation to spread his legs even wider than before, forcing you to sit uncomfortably in order to make space for him. 

“Shinazugawa,” you say placidly. “You’re really considerate of my personal space, you know?”

You smile sweetly. Too sweetly, in fact, that Shinazugawa finds it eerie, and mumbles something along the lines of ‘my bad’. You force your legs open and bump into his knee, hard. Shinazugawa keeps his legs to himself after that. 

The flight takes about two and a half hours to Okinawa’s Ishigaki airport from Tokyo. You’d love to work on that multichapter story you have going on, but you quite obviously can’t let Shinazugawa see the skeletons in your closet one more time. Instead, you close your eyes and put on your headphones. 

As much as you have written fanfiction about perfect relationships more times than you can count – surprising your partner with a bouquet of flowers, heated make-out make-up sessions in the rain, cute domestic moments –  your real life experience regarding love and romance is lacking. No one you dated was really that great or lasted that long. Once you entered the workforce, you’d been too busy to even think about entertaining someone else’s time. 

You’ve gone through a whole assortment of partners: cheaters, manipulators, gaslighters, mommy’s boys, gold diggers, even the one person who tried to steal your underwear. The bar is quite literally in hell. Despite this, you’ve found that many of the partners over the course of your life seem to stumble over it anyways. Dating apps are a shitfest of ‘looking for a good time’, which translates into ‘looking for a quick fuck’. Chance encounters leaves creeps who include stalkers, perverts, and possibly psychopaths, which you would love to avoid for your own safety. 

Shinazugawa sits firmly in the ‘No Dating’ category because he’s your boss (though you may be inclined to move him to a greyer area, given the chance). Office relationships are more trouble than what they’re worth and rumours spread through the departments faster than a forest fire. Last week, you heard that Uzui from Graphic Design got caught with not one, but three employees outside a love hotel. You shudder at the thought of having your personal life turning into office gossip, a quick laugh for employees who linger in the break room too long. Though, the whole foursome thing sounds pretty interesting, and you stow that memory away for a future writing project. 

You may be strongly against dating your boss, but he does have some redeeming qualities. For what it’s worth, Shinazugawa is good-looking and… kind? The adjective floats in the air, and you’re unsure if you’ve actually had him be nice to you. He’s usually annoyed at most things. On the off chance he isn’t, Shinazugawa’s eating some sort of traditional sweet. Rumours say he once smiled while drinking matcha, though you doubt that. 

You wouldn’t peg Shinazugawa (haha) to be the most gentlemanly, kindhearted person in the world, but surely there’s some good in his cold, dark heart. Either that or the stroke game might make up for it. You don’t know if you want to know the answer to that one. 

You try to think about something other than boning your boss. 

You try really, really hard. 

.

When you land, a driver picks you up from the airport and drives you to the ferry terminal, where you and Shinazugawa catch a boat ride from Ishigaki to Taketomi island. You’re thankful you’re not easily seasick, but the short trip makes Shinazugawa look like he’s ready to throw up overboard. You pretend not to notice. 

The island is quiet, with a population of about 300 people. It’s a life away from Tokyo. For once, you aren’t assaulted with the familiar trill of a Suntory advertisement, or neon lights raging from a dingy bar. The sunlight is pleasantly warm, making the back of your neck damp. You take in a slow, deep breath of the ocean air. It’s refreshing. 

Your accommodation for the night is a short walk away. A few stray cats loiter shyly by the front gate, staring at you with their narrow pupils till you get too close and they scamper off into the bushes. The owner is a pleasant middle-aged man. He shows you the annexed guest house and the amenities, before leaving you and Shinazugawa to settle down. 

A cool wave of air conditioning hits you as you enter the guest house, making your skin prickle. You instantly spot two twin beds. Thank god. It isn’t quite as secure as having separate rooms, but you guess that management was already trying to cut down the budget on your trip, so this will have to do.

You’re quick to claim the bed nearest to the wall. If anything happens, you could pretend to be asleep and have your back turned to Shinazugawa. You have a myriad of backup plans just in case of the trip going south. Including, but not limited to: getting diarrhoea, falling and getting caught in Shinazugawa’s buff arms, him finding your ugly high waisted grandma underwear, or even sneaking through your phone and discovering your writing blog. The solution to one of those situations may include you ‘disappearing’ off the coast of Taketomi. You’d catch an early ferry back, dispose of a fake corpse off the beach, move back to your rural hometown and plant vegetables for the rest of your life.  

You like to think of yourself as overprepared, and not so much an overthinker. 

Honestly, you weren’t exactly pleased about sharing a room. What if Shinazugawa smothers you to death with a pillow? What if he finds out you snore and tells everyone at work? Or worst of all, what if you’re gassy in your sleep and fart bomb your boss? You can’t exactly quell all your fears, you suppose. You simply pray that dinner tonight is gentle on your gut. On the other hand, there’s the image of Shinazugawa emerging fresh from a hot bath, his hair wet and a towel loosely tied around his waist. Now, that’s something you can certainly distract yourself with. 

You busy yourself with setting your bags down. You hadn’t brought much, just a change of clothes, skincare, and some other essentials (including an emergency fake passport for, you know, purposes). Shinazugawa stretches his arms above his head with a heavy sigh. You briefly glance over at him from your corner of the room. His shirt rises over the waistband of his pants, showing a sliver of pale skin and the elastic of his underwear. Black and white, simple and mature. Blood rushes to your face. You duck your head, accidentally bumping your elbow against the wall, and you yelp in pain.

Shinazugawa turns to look at you. 

“Are you okay?”

You don’t dare to meet his eyes. You can’t explain that the reason why you hit yourself accidentally was because you were ogling Shinazugawa like he was a man slut, so you fold your lips into a tight line and nod. You are in all honesty no better than a man. 

Shinazugawa stares. He wants to walk over and make sure that you’re really okay, but he’s struggling in his own right to not cross the strange, blurry boundary between employer and employee. Sure. You’re cute. Shinazugawa can admit that much. He wouldn’t necessarily say that he has a crush on you, though. Crushes are for teenagers, puppy love that dissolves into disgust when one party gets the ick from something dumb. 

Shinazugawa can’t pinpoint the exact date when his feelings started to get muddled. Around that time, Shinazugawa was noticeably more on edge and shouted for you to come to his office at least twice a day. He was somewhat satisfied with seeing you more often, but your stress and anxiety at work increased as a result. You were convinced your boss was eventually going to murder you for any small mistake you made. Masachika had to text Shinazugawa how you always jolted when someone called your name, a flight response you had unknowingly picked up. He learned to dial down his yelling after that.  

Shinazguawa doesn’t force himself to think about how you pout when he scolds you (which makes him feel bad for a second, but Christ, he really didn’t need you to fuck up that presentation), the sleepy look on your face when you come into work the morning after overtime (eyes all bleary and the back of your hair unbrushed), or the rare moment where you’re professional and incredibly attractive while you whittle down clients to sign a contract – but your lips look soft and your eyes are pretty and if there’s anything that Shinazugawa likes, it’s a mature person who knows how to do their job, but who is also a little dense. 

You may have baited, hooked, and reeled Shinazugawa in without even realising it. He doesn’t want to acknowledge the fact that having you on the same project team was his intention all along, but he’s not the kind of person to admit defeat so easily, even when you’re going to be sharing a room with him for the night. He’s a capable, late twenty-something adult, and Shinazugawa surely doesn’t need you to tempt him more than you already have.

Maybe he wants to be tempted. He’ll never admit it. 

When Shinazugawa found you that night, fanfiction lighting up the dim office with your bright monitor, he wasn’t dumb enough to scold you right away. He watched you from a safe distance, reading the words on your screen as his face warmed till his head was about to explode from the sheer pressure. You were writing about him – him! Calling him handsome, stunning, soul-achingly good looking. 

It took a few searches to find your blog. Shinazugawa thought he was about to lose his mind, staying up till the wee hours in the morning when he finally found your username (he should remind you about the permanence of an internet footprint). Then he read it: the fanfiction you wrote about him. The lewd, ludicrous thoughts you had about him, barely concealed behind the character’s first name of ‘Shinawa’. He allowed himself to huff a soft laugh. It took everything in Shinazugawa not to blow his cover. He knows you hate him, despite the glorifying posts where you bemoan wanting to bed him in all sorts of positions he had to Google. It was wrong, shameful even, but only if he didn’t like you. Shinazugawa spent the rest of the night tossing and turning in bed. It felt utterly stupid: a working adult who was overwhelmed with sticky, sweet feelings that made his heart skip a beat. He certainly had arrhythmia, and was not lovesick.

Shinazugawa’s never been great at romance. His rough and tough personality scared off many people in his younger years, where he was prone to flare up at everyone and anyone. It wasn’t really his fault. He wasn’t ever taught how to manage his emotions and still struggles to not turn to anger like some sort of drug. Emotions mean vulnerability, and vulnerability means he’s defenceless, so Shinazugawa keeps his sensitive heart buried under years of repression and ignorance. 

The one girl he confessed to, Kocho Kanae, rejected him gently saying that she wasn’t interested in men at all. He spent a whole month moping, pledging to himself that he’ll never fall in love again. 

Thankfully for the both of you, Shinazugawa has absolutely no clue on how to woo anyone, nor does he want to ruin the professional image both of you have worked so hard to maintain. He keeps his feelings for you under lock and key, hoping that one day, you’ll cave and be the one to confess for both of your sakes. Shinazugawa may be good at most things (settling his year-end taxes, formatting a Word document, and working out regularly), but when it comes to love, he’s a total fucking idiot. 

Shinazugawa finally relents. He turns back to his own bag with a shrug, picking out what he needs to explore the island, mainly sunscreen and his phone for photos and notes.  

“Ready to go?” 

You shoulder your tote and adjust the cap that you’ve pulled over your head. You think you see Shinazugawa’s cheeks turn pink, but you don’t think too much of it. Maybe it’s the heat getting to him. Shinazugawa steps out of the guest house and back into the humid air. 

Fuck, the both of you think. Why did Masachika have to abandon us? 

You hope you manage to survive the trip without Shinazugawa killing you.

Shinazugawa hopes you don’t find out he wants you as someone more than a colleague.

ɞ an | this chapter was a little more serious, but we finally got to see sanemi's pov on things!! what do you think? next 2 chapters will still be on the okinawa trip :3c i'm struggling to write soft!sanemi and not make him ooc, so hopefully it reads ok >< huge shoutout to bound by internetpistols for helping me get through this writing hiccup i've been having... writing is hard...

[victimsofyaoipoll]

Round 3

Propaganda Under Cut

Kairi

kairi is the third protagonist of the kingdom hearts series and the third member of the destiny trio, alongside fan favorites sora and riku. sora/riku shippers HATE kairi, and will go out of their way to discount her at every turn. the hate for her ranges from typical "she's a boring bitch" to fans of soriku making five-hour long video essays reassuring their fellow shippers that the big bad kairi won't show up in the next installment – to quote one video, "she's in a box. she's on the shelf. four walls, no door." kairi is the greatest bogeyman the soriku fandom has ever known, to the point where most of said video essays and fanon meta posts focus not on why sora and riku should get together, but rather on why they don't like kairi.

Literally has a 100+ page Google doc fan theory writing her out of the narrative and putting all of her (few) canonical accomplishments onto half of the popular m/m ship (soriku). Don't even get me started on how her memory was completely written out of the canon plot of re:coded. KH is a nightmare to explain so dude trust me she is THE victim of yaoi

She is so fundamental to the plot and themes and narratives of game and yet it is near impossible to find anything about her thats not ship bashing pre-mlm with the other two characters. I dont even care if she ends up with one of the main characters i just want fans to see her as a cool character to love or like, anything other than “annoying comphet girl.” You can write your mlm but pleaae stop inventing comphet where it doesnt exist. She does not even get to spend time with sora ever?? Why does everyone see her as a threat and a thing to destroy?? Let her have friends so help me

Misa Amane

she gets treated in-canon the way fandoms treat female characters that Threaten an m/m ship. it's like, "oh why don't you go sit in the corner and be pretty, misa, while the Men have intelligent conversation and pretend they aren't ten seconds from fucking each other, doesn't that sound nice?" it's infuriating. and MAYBE it's better now but i remember her getting treated the same way in fanfiction too, like we all need to do just as badly by our female secondary characters as fucking tsugumi ohba, but with the added insult of making her be alternately oblivious of the relationship between light and L or actively trying to sabotage it—incompetently, of course, because god forbid misa be allowed dignity or moments of cleverness.

she's one of the first characters I think of when I consider old school fandom misogyny. The annoying bitch and clingy crazy gf allegations were AFTER HER ASS. She's also a lot more intelligent than people gave her credit for, but most seem inclined to take the Very Biased word of our unreliable, narcissistic narrator and his homoerotic arch nemesis and claim that just because she's bubbly and into romance that she's also a complete moron. Which is blatantly untrue. Everyone was afraid of Misa girlbossing too hard. Killing people and devoting yourself to the deranged twink of your dreams even though you know he'll never love you back??? Having a hardcore goth aesthetic and being so Hot even literal Death Gods are into you?? God forbid women do ANYTHING!

Not only is she the victim of yaoi culture, she is the victim of early 2000s misogyny by an author that wanted to introduce a girl character because he knew his male rivals were getting too homoerotic. She is a goth bimbo icon who portrays what I think is one of the few callouts for stan culture and what parasocial relationships can do to both the stan and the idol. The fact that she is a toxic fan of Kira and also hot, funny, sociable is tragic in its own way, which I think the author did try to touch on but was too misogynistic too really get through. Of course, she was reduced to villain status by the fandom and anime alike because she got in the way of the supposed romance in their psychological horror anime.

[cloudinterlude]

There's a certain tone that bleeds into a lot of MCU fanfiction when talking about Steve's defrosting into the new century and it's bothersome. It's like people don't fully understand why he didn't have to be grateful for being in modern times. There's a serious lack of empathy and it always ends up with some other character ranting to Steve about how he needs to suck it up and move on if he wants to get anywhere in life and somehow that motivates Steve to...realize he was the only one being an asshole and learning to love the current world?

Yeah no.

I've read one (1) - and isn't to say other stories I like got it wrong bc I've certainly read others that are also great - but I've read ONE fanfiction that describes Steve's situation perfectly (in such a meaningful way) and it literally blew my mind when I read it because it was so good to ME.

"Ain't no Grave" by spitandvinegar was amazing. Mind you, I'm not a really Stucky shipper in any capacity (like I see the vision but don't feel it yknow?), but I'm a sucker for satisfying Steve characterization so I inhaled this fic. And y'all...this author did his character justice. It's not even a Steve-centric story! Which made me even more amazed (that the author got him so right) and even more annoyed (that so many people get him so wrong and end up bashing him). I quote the paragraph below but I urge you to read the fic if you're interested!

Like listen, listen. Imagine you live in this country, right? And there's a brutal war, and you witness and maybe participate in a horrific amount of violence, and you lose absolutely everyone you care about. Then you end up in this other country, where the culture and ways of doing things are completely foreign to you, and random assholes make fun of you for how you dress and act and talk while you're still coming to grips with the fact that everyone you love is gone and you can never go home again. Meanwhile, everyone around you is like "smile, motherfucker, you're in the Land of Plenty now, where there's a Starbucks on every corner and 500 channels on TV. You should be grateful! Why aren't you acting more grateful?" So you have to pretend to be grateful while you're dying inside. Sound like an traumatized, orphaned refugee? Also sounds like Steve fucking Rogers, Captain Goddamn America. Except that most refugees were part of a community of other people who were going through the same thing. Steve is all alone, the last damn unicorn, if the last unicorn had horrible screaming nightmares about the time when it helped to liberate Buchenwald.

AMAZING RIGHT? It was very satisfying to read the first time around. Even more satisfying that this was coming from Sam's POV which was just a lovely decision.

Anyways!

This little rant isn't even coming from a place of superiority. I know characterization can be difficult, and it's not so much about the quality rather than the fundamental misunderstanding of Steve's character that makes it obvious that either the author doesn't care enough to try to empathize with him, 2) They're using Steve to prop up some other character or 3) They watched his trilogy with their eyes closed and called it a day.

This post has gotten too long so thats all I'll say for now!

[skippydiesposting]

ughhh okay hot take incoming but it's so annoying to me that every single time there's a post that's like "read more books reading books is good for you" there has to be that person in the notes like "but fanfiction counts too right????"

no!!!! that's exactly the opposite of the point! like there's no problem with reading fanfiction but reading exclusively fanfiction is not something you should be proud of. by reading only fanfiction you are excluding yourself from so many of the best parts of literature: character development, structured plots with an end goal, foreshadowing, the connection to the author's life...not even to mention, like, cultural relevance and the value of reading something that has been professionally edited. it's not especially clear to me that someone who reads only fanfiction can be said to actually enjoy reading since so many of the elements that make literature what it is have been stripped out of it. like if you're so entrenched in the emotional gratification of fanfiction that you can't bear to read a real, published novel, then I don't think you have very good chance of being someone who knows how to critically analyze and understand media.

like fanfiction is not morally wrong or anything like that but it's a fundamentally different thing than reading an edited, published book. they have such different goals that they are not equivalent to compare.

[jonathan-sins]

I read 50 books in 2024. Here are my reviews

Some of these are marked with either (slight spoilers) or (major spoilers!!!). All the Dungeon Meshi volumes are on this list, and all of them contain very slight spoilers along the line of “a fight happened” or “we met a new character”, as there wasn’t much else to say about such short segments. There is one volume with major spoilers, which has been marked on the list

Books read in 2024

One of us is back
3/5 
the first half is weak. The new cast is too big and it’s confusing. No proper investment in making me care about the characters means there are no stakes. The second half is good. Everything ties together neatly. The final twist is shocking and well foreshadowed at the same time. The first book is better, and works just as well as a complete story, which means the sequel struggles to justify its own existence, besides piggybacking off the success of the first book to make the author more money.
despite my complaints, I did have a lot of fun. It’s hardly Shakespeare, but if you’re looking for a beach read or something this book is great.


Red White and Royal Blue
5/5 
So much fun. A rollercoaster of emotions that had me laughing til my face hurt one minute and sobbing the next. 
Not just a fun romance with good banter and mutual pining, but also a criticism of celebrity culture, homophobia, and not respecting famous people’s privacy. It feels like fanfiction in the best way possible


If we were villains
3/5 
It was alright I guess. There’s nothing wrong with it. The banter was fun, the build up to act three was good. Three one was shockingly gruesome. After that, as everything fell apart, I just lost interest. I couldn’t finish the last fifty pages. I think comparing it to the secret history and Babel is unfair, as it doesn’t really have the same depth, and there’s nothing wrong with liking the aesthetic, but if you’re expecting something deep and meaningful it will feel like a cheap copy. If I hadn’t gone in expecting TSH but with Shakespeare I think i would’ve liked it more. 


Babel: an Arcane History
4/5 
Absolutely heartbreaking. A tragic tale of violence and oppression from beginning to end. 
there are two reasons it’s not 5 stars. One, the narration is very modern and it hurts the immersion a bit. Two, the authors notes. 
throughout the book, there are little pieces of extra information at the bottom of the page.
half of them could have been compiled in the back of the book, and the other half could have been cut. It broke the immersion what was already being tested by the modern language.
I have seen complaints that religion isn’t talked about enough, and it would have been interesting to explore Ramy’s faith more, but I didn’t notice it until it was pointed out and even then it doesn’t bother me.
Despite these nitpicks, this is an amazing story full of life, shocking-but-well-foreshadowed twists, a unique and well thought out magic system, and a world and history that feels so much bigger than this one story.
the ending could easily have felt unnecessary and contrived, but Kuang sets such a suffocating tone of inevitability that there truly feels like there was no other way.


The Night Circus
3.5/5 
a simple, entertaining tale! The main reason it doesn’t get a higher rating is because the main couple act like lovesick teenagers despite being in their late 30’s, and it tests the believability of the characters. You could argue it’s because of how sheltered they were, but it was mostly just annoying to me. The start is also a bit slow, but other than that, I loved it! 
The Man in The Gray Suit is by far my favourite character. He’s very mysterious and absolutely fascinating!


Twisted love (mild spoilers)
1/5 
possibly the most toxic romance I’ve ever seen. Alex has zero respect for Ava’s autonomy, and he never once listened to her when she asked him to literally stop stalking her.
both Alex and Josh are super mysogynistic and treat Ava, a 
22 year old GROWN ASS WOMAN, like a stupid, delicate little flower.
this would have been a 0 star book if it weren’t for the INSANE tone change like 2/3rds in. This book decided to have a thriller/batman vengeance plot out of absolutely nowhere, and then it just goes back to being a romance???
there are many, MANY mean things I could call this book, but “boring” is certainly not one of them. It’s so bad its entertaining 


The picture of Dorian Gray
5/5 
A perfect example of how to write a good corruption arc. All of the main characters are surprisingly fleshed out for being walking representatives for different philosophies, and the way Dorian is slowly being swayed to Harry’s views is very realistic. The picture itself is written almost as a character in its own right, and works as a perfect foil for Dorian. 
I love the ending, it’s so neat and fitting.


Northern Lights (His Dark Materials book 1) (slight spoilers)
5/5
this is the first of a trilogy, and as such it doesn’t have a complete arc. It is the beginning of an arc, and it sets up all the main players perfectly. It does a great job of fleshing out the world without being too exposision-heavy, and the big betrayal at the end is made all the more impactful for being as well-foreshadowed as it is.


The Subtle Knife (His Dark Materials book 2) (major spoilers!!!)
4/5 
it does a good job of introducing the new worlds, and gradual reveals give the feeling of learning how this new system works alongside the characters, helped by Will, a new deuteragonist from “our” world. That being said, it could easily have been fifty pages shorter without losing any meaningful plot. 
It sets up a lot without any of it really paying off. An example of this is John Parry. We learn that Dr. Grumman is Wills missing father, aka the lynchpin in Wills story. We know they’re related before anyone in the story does, and we’re just waiting for them to reunite. And they meet! For three seconds before John is killed. All that setup for so little payoff is frustrating. Adding to the disappointment is the fact that we already knew. Dramatic Irony can be a good tool for building tension, but when it’s overdone it just makes the characters look stupid for not realising something so obvious to the audience. Had we discovered that he’s Wills dad at the same time as Will, the tragedy would be much more impactful. It would have recontextualised all the little hints, and it would have let us feel what Will felt: shock at the discovery, followed by grief at not just the death itself, but the fact it happened before they could get to know each other. The audience knows John. We know him better than Will ever did, and that distances us from Wills grief for the relationship that could have been. 
the main reason this isn’t a 3.5 is because the side plot with Mary is so well written. It’s also more violent than the first book, and the children are believably scared. It’s great escalation of tension.


To Kill A Mockingbird 
4.5/5 
I honestly don’t have much to say. It was a good time, I especially loved the accents (written accents are always a huge plus for me) and “serious topic seen through the perspective of a child” is a really cool idea. It never dragged on too much and I had fun. Not enough fun for a five star review, but it’s still a solid book. I gasped at the plot twist and I was certainly engaged, but it just never made me very emotional. The sad scenes didn’t really affect me, and I’m usually a crier.


Dot Con
4.5/5
a highly informative, entertaining recap of the buildup and bust of the internet stock market bubble. It presents all the different factors at play in a straightforward way that is easy to keep track of as events unfold and the bubble inflates. The only reason it’s not 5 stars is because some parts got a little repetitive, especially when listing the point drops and stock prices of every major company, but I understand why it was written that way.


The Amber Spyglass. (His Dark Materials book 3)
 5/5
Great payoff for everything set up in the subtle knife. Everything is tied neatly together. The ending was sad, but fitting and satisfying. 


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 1
5/5 
does a great job establishing the cast and their dynamics. They have good chemistry and realistic conflicts they need to work on ( like Marcilles insecurity and Laois social skills). 


Part of Your World
4.5/5 
a really heartwarming story about personal choice, overcoming abuse and breaking the cycle. It has very realistic representation of emotional abuse and its consequences, both by parents and partners, and how one leads to another. It has a touch of magic realism that’s very subtle but fun when you notice it. My only complaint is that it drags on a little, and some of the miscommunication/pining got a bit annoying at certain points.

The Whisperers
4.5/5 
a very insightful look into the everyday lives of Soviet citizens. Each new segment recontextualises the previous one and naturally leads into the next one. There are families and people we follow throughout, sprinkled between the one-off anecdotes, which is a really good way of keeping people engaged. We slowly get a more fleshed-out view of the lives of one poor family of Jewish shopkeepers, contrasted with the life of a rich, upperclass writer. 


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 2 
5/5 
introduces orcs, plants the seeds of the mystery of the Kingdoms past, and introduces a food chain and other interactions between the monsters. Overall, great expansion and world building!


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 3
4.5/5 
Introduces an old party member and expands on the adventurer community. Some very fun dynamics between the party and the new group, shows how different parties can be. Also continues the parallel arc with Kabru’s party


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 4 
5/5 
the battle that’s been building since page 1 finally happened, and it was definitely worth the hype. All the characters got to show off their unique talents and really play off each other as a unit, and several Chekhov’s Guns were fired 


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 5
4/5 
Kabru and Laois parties finally meet! Interesting new character dynamics are forming, and it does a great job of setting up the new arc


The Great Gatsby
3.5/5 
It has some interesting themes about the past vs the future, dreams vs reality, and a creative twist on the rags to riches story. Overall a solid story with interesting symbolism. It was a good read, but I didn’t really connect with it. The emotions never reached me


No Longer Human 
4/5 
A truly fascinating tale full of twists and a persistent atmosphere of oppressive dread


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 6
4/5 
it’s slower than volumes 4 and 5, which is needed after so much drama. A potential new party member is excitement enough, and being able to slow down while staying engaging is a sign of good writing


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 7 
5/5 
Senshis backstory was an unexpected gut punch, and really well handled. The stakes are upped and character relationships are tested and strengthened


Project Hail Mary
5/5 
absolutely amazing! A perfectly balanced combination of funny and tragic, simple and sophisticated. The science is explained in simple terms without ever feeling patronising, and the protagonist even has a Watsonian reason to be talking like that. It kept me engaged and on the edge of my seat from page one. The protagonists intelligence is very realistic. His mistakes happen for a reason and don’t feel like they’re just there for juicy plot, which is a common problem in these types of stories. 


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 8 
4/5 
the Canaries have entered the dungeon! We also got Chilchuck and the Toudens backstory, and the changeling Arc was a good way for the cast to learn about each others race, and understand each other better. Also, we have plan to save Falin!


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 9
5/5
the stakes have been thoroughly upped! Some fun Chekhovs Guns were fired, and a huge piece of dramatic irony has been introduced! Not to mention learning why dungeons were created in the first place!


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 10
5/5 
it’s the final confrontation with Sissel! It ends on quite the cliffhanger, and it will be very interesting to see how Laios plans to get out of this one


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 11
5/5
the fight was awesome! Not only did Laios get to push his monster knowledge to the limit and win with strategy against Sissels brute force, but the final conclusion was both unexpected, foreshadowed, and scary! And that’s just the first two chapters! 
so much happens in this one and all of it kept me on the edge of my seat


Dungeon Meshi vol.12 (major spoilers!!!)
5/5
Marcille becoming the Dungeon Lord was not a twist I saw coming, but looking back it makes a lot of sense for her character. We also get to see more of the Winged Lions personality, which was really fun. The way they worked together to snap her out of it was such an awesome moment!


Dungeon Meshi Vol. 13
5/5
it’s the second to last volume! The final confrontation was epic, and we finally got to see all the different groups come together to stop the Winged Lion. The way Laios defeats the demon is so narratively fitting. 


Dungeon Meshi vol. 14
5/5
the finale! And what a finale it is. I’m weirdly glad everyone doesn’t just get a fully happy ending. Like, sure they’re content with their lives, but the consequences of their journey stayed with them. I’m a little sad that they split up, but their desires were incompatible together and I understand that. Sometimes it’s for the best.


Angels before man
5/5
such a beautiful tragedy. Even as Lucifer spirals more and more, you just can’t help but root for him. You know how this story ends, but there’s such an atmosphere of hope and change that you think they might actually do it for a bit. 


Entangled Life
5/5
an absolutely fascinating look into the lives of fungi, the many ways they effect the world, the ways they can help us in the fight against climate change. And the many, MANY unanswered questions we have about their lives and biology. The only nitpick I have is that chapter 3 was a bit of slog to get through, because it was all about lichens. While they are fascinating, they’re just not what I’m interested in. The rest of the book more than makes up for it though!


1984 
5/5
A fascinating world with great world building and deep philosophical musings, and a scathing critique of authoritarianism and inequality 


Unlocking the keto code
4/5
Very entertaining, and conveys information with easy-to-follow metaphors and an upbeat tone. The recipes in the back are a nice bonus. For being an educational book on nutrition, it is a bit outdated. It recommends several foods we now know to be unhealthy, but I still learned a lot about mitochondrial health and function. 


The phantom of the opera
4/5
the framing of a story within a story, with the narrator researching a “real” closed case at the real Paris Opera House, is really fun! You get so sucked in that it’s a fun little reminder of the extra layer every time he addresses the reader. The plot is convoluting at times, but easy enough to follow if you’re paying attention, and I was never frustrated. My only complaint is the dialogue is very stiff, and the author often muddles things by being needlessly detailed in his descriptions, which was the norm of writing at that time, so I can’t complain too much. 


Start with why
3/5
it has some interesting ideas, but it’s very repetitive. It would have been much better if it had cut to the chase and said what it was trying to say in 150 pages. As it is, a lot of it feels like filling. I get what he was going for, with the recurring lines, but if you have a recurring line it’s meaning has to evolve with the story, and invoke multiple perspectives as the context changes around it. The expansion of the Golden Circle was well done, and it had a cool evolution, but the rest was meh


Girl in pieces
5/5
an incredibly tragic tale packed with emotional moments. I had to read the first part in small sessions to keep myself from getting too sad. It has a beautifully hopeful, bittersweet ending perfectly suited to our protagonist. I love that they didn’t act like everything was okay in the end. The whole story is made all the more impactful for how real it is. 


The Lake House
2/5
I found out after I read it that it’s a sequel, which honestly just makes it worse. I was not confused at any point because the events of the first book are summarised in the first three chapters. I imagine that would be very annoying for those who’ve read the first one, and it makes it feel like a waste of time. 
There are many reasons this book is bad. The plot is easy to follow, but it’s just straight up badly written. It reads like a Wattpad fanfic in the worst way. The characters dynamics feel flat, the romance felt shoehorned in, and the writing style itself just wasn’t fun to read. The point of view was kind of weird too. Chapters from Franny’s perspective are first person, but everyone else gets third person limited. It was jarring and unnecessary.


A good girls guide to murder (good girl series book 1)
5/5
after forcing myself through the Lake House, this was a welcome surprise. The characters are fleshed out and interesting, the mystery is complex and intriguing, and some of the reveals had me gasping out loud. The way all the clues come together in the end is very satisfying, and it’s super fun seeing all the loose threads tidied together so neatly. Every word feels intentional, and I was constantly analysing and rearranging the clues right alongside Pip. Speaking of Pip, she’s an amazingly written protagonist, and fits this kind of story perfectly. Her relationship with Ravi was super fun to read.


Boomerang
4/5
surprisingly entertaining for an economics book. A series of case study-esque looks at five different countries with five different responses to a sudden shift in world economy following the 2008 recession. 


Good girl, bad blood (good girl series book 2) (slight spoilers)
5/5
I love the idea of the first book being an in-universe podcast, and her using that to help with the case. There’s a clear escalation, from cold to active cases, and the ending was way darker than I expected. 


Animal farm
4/5
The metaphor is obvious and solid, and the point was well made. It really feels like a classic fable made to teach a lesson


This winter 
5/5
for a short Christmas story, this packs quite the emotional punch. Tori and Charlie both have their own struggles, and their sibling dynamic is very relatable 


As good as dead (good girl series book 3) (slight spoilers)
5/5
A thrilling conclusion! Pip is realistically traumatised from the events of bad blood, and she’s not coping very well, which makes for great conflict. The whole Full Circle theme is very well done, and I love the way everything ties in to the last two cases. The “everything was connected all along” reveal is always fun, and I love that we see more of Andie’s real personality and motives 


Radio silence 
5/5
such a rollercoaster of emotions! It went from sad to sweet to heartbreaking to hopeful, and all the characters are super fleshed out. I especially love Aled and Daniel’s relationship.


The boy in the striped pyjamas 
5/5
the gradual reveal is very well done, and the dramatic irony adds a great extra layer to the story. It does a good job of trusting the audience, giving us hints and details to let us figure out what is happening without ever actually saying it. You don’t need to confirm anything if you know the readers are smart enough to figure it out.


Hvordan Magnus Karlsen ble verdensmester 
3/5 
not bad for a 45kr book. Would definitely have been a lot better if I cared about chess in the slightest 


Heartstopper vol. 1
5/5
such a cute story! Had me kicking my feet and grinning at the book. I love the little speech bubbles that just have exclamation marks or hearts in them. And the playlist and diary entries at the back!!


Heartstopper Vol. 2 (major spoilers!!!)
5/5
they’re official!! Nick came out to his mum!!! I’m so happy for them! This series truly is the dopamine hit i need to survive the beginning of next term

[tossawary]

im loving those tidbits of svss worldbuilding lore youre sharing from the reread because i myself had forgotten 100% of them. recently found out huan hua palace specializes in illusion and concealment which turned me into one of those loading screens for 20 minutes straight. there were so many plot points hiding behind names, perfectly available to the pidw reader too...

Thank you! And I know, right?! Catch me as a PIDW transmigrator missing every single plot point because I'm missing so much cultural context! It would cause Peerless Cucumber [Expert] physical pain to watch.

(Total side note, but this is why I'm tempted to write a Third Transmigrator AU for Mobei-Jun's mom. I think it would be so funny to have a English-speaking person who, idk, only read the beginning of the unfinished, unofficial translation of the unofficial webtoon of PIDW transmigrate in unable to speak the language. MBJ is born and grows up bilingual; and when Airplane Bro accidentally drops some Chinglish, Mobei-Jun can say in fully fluent English, "What the fuck did you just say?")

It's so good to go back and check stuff out, because I do just forget this stuff or misremeber it or mix it up with some AU interpretation someone did in their fanfiction. I get a little annoyed with myself when it turns out I've gotten stuff wrong that I didn't mean to get wrong, but I'm still glad that I popped the fanon bubble I'd accidentally been cultivating over the past two years or so. If I'm getting things wrong, I generally want to be doing it intentionally.

I think my favorite detail that I just completely forgot is that at the end of the Airplane Extras, Linguang-Jun at one point transforms into a black wind to flee? I'll go find the exact passage in a few hours. I generally headcanon Linguang-Jun being a half-brother to Mobei-Jun Senior, so now I'm headcanoning his other parent as a wind demon. It's a nice addition to my self-indulgent worldbuilding daydreams.

[hard--headed--woman]

this may seem random but I was scrolling your blog and one of your recent posts was about what got you into radfem ideology and I wanted to add my own story cause it was similar.

I remember having blogs on here for various fandoms and being around when the push to headcanon every other character as trans came about. coincidentally, it was always the taller, broader women that got labeled as trans women (but always in some progressive light like they were bestowing them the "honor").

at first, I just kept myself out of it. I didn't know enough about being trans to add my own opinion. but then, on my blogs, I would get asks about "gender headcanons" (do you remember those? jfc) and I would feel pressured to make at LEAST one trans, if not nonbinary, even though it all seemed so redundant.

I ended up removing myself from fandom culture completely until very recently. I keep my opinions separate from my new fandom blog, for my own sanity, but it does irritate me to see that this obsession with every character being queer is still alive and well. and yet us actual gay people are just supposed to pretend it's not a trend.

Oh my god the gender headcanons 😭 I literally hated them. I remember when I was deep into the Loki show fandom ; it was literally impossible not to headcanon Loki and Sylvie as trans, non binary or genderfluid. That was ALL people were talking about. Just because Sylvie is a strong and badass female character, she of course had to be a trans woman or at least some sort of non binary. And obviously you couldn't say you disagreed, or you were an evil TERF. People would spam the tags and the discord servers with this, and send you asks to ask you what were your gender headcanons, and you couldn't say you just saw them as normal women and men.

Fandoms are so obsessed with gender. I read fics sometimes, OK, I like it, actually. And when you look for fanfictions you literally cannot spend two seconds without seeing tags like "trans Ronald Weasley", "genderfluid Nymphadora Tonks" and shit like that. Crazy.

People are obsessed with making characters "queer". They'll turn every character into some nuance of trans or non binary, often poly and pansexual too. Everything about the characters then becomes related to "queerness" or "gender" - the way they act, dress, speak, everything they do, say or like. They're no more depth or intersting personalities, it's just "queer uwu". And you have, of course, to headcanon some characters as trand or enby, or you're boring and possibly terfy.

Also I agree with you - I notice it's always the characters that are even just a bit gnc that get headcanoned as non binary, especially female characters. Sylvie isn’t a nice pretty little princess who gives up on everything for her man and her outfit isn’t sexualized ? Trans. Tonks has short hair ? Non binary! This masculine female character ? Trans of course. Sooo annoying.

I removed myself from fandom spaces too lol. Because of their obsession with gender, but also their misogyny in general. Female characters are treated like shit by fandoms. They get ignored, vilanized, killed off/pushed out of the way for male characters, treated like sexual objects... I just decided to abandon my side blogs and to leave the fandom discord servers I was in. I can't enjoy fandom in such conditions.

[shadowbrightshine]

My mom, who is in her 40s came into my room asking me about a tag she saw on a romance book sale. "Tail play" She doesn't really read romance but she was looking for paranormal fiction and she does like werewolves and they all seemed to be there. Also she was looking for one of her favorite authors and hoped one or two of her books would be onsale.

This led into a really interesting conversation. See my mom is a strong Christian, and I am too. I'm a monsterlover, and a furry. (ace and sex repulsed but I do read kink focused smut because the lead up is usually much better than normal stuff.) and she was obsessed with Vampires as a teenager.

So people aren't annoyed by the length.

She says she looked up most of them, and she figured out the rest. But one, the tail one she didn't get any results from Google searches and figured I, the self proclaimed monster lover and the one who she knows has more adult friends than she has might know what Tail play is. (I use a lot more social media and have a bunch of close friends on an 18+ server, so nice to just have other adults around. I like hanging with my other teen friends but it's nice to have a break.)

She thought it might be like butt plugs, which could be, but she mentioned it was the paranormal section and I explained it's a very popular thing to make the tail an eroginous zone. It can be used well, or used as a lazy way to get a character in the mood without trying. (I actually learned about it from gacha videos when I was 14, but I didn't know that wasn't a real animal thing for a bit so I avoided touching dogs tails so they wouldn't get mad at me lmao)

She doesn't read smut, and doesn't even really like romance. At least not when it's the focus, so when she was looking around she ran unprepared into the bottom bin romance 'trash' and actual romance trash. She was shocked by all the noncon, and she said she felt a bit sick even just reading some of the descriptions of the stories. We talked about the Fantasy but also that it's weird. It's odd that so many romance books marketed to young adults feature noncon and straight up rape.

Sometimes it feels like an excuse for lazy writers to ignore any chemistry because they can just force the sex scenes. Which is. Not good.

She also stumbled upon omegaverse and I explained it to her. I don't read it myself, I respect the place it has in internet history and fandom culture but I've never liked the alpha beta omega stuff, even before the Alpha Male Bros tm came a crawling, begging for scraps of coolness. She didn't like it. She also prefers more women in her stories and omegaverse by default is mostly men.

But one of the big things to me, was when she was talking about the possessiveness in a ton of werewolf fiction. She didn't like how everything seemed to only cater to the desire to be required to stay and to be owned. To be dominated. She says she's always preferred what little romance she reads to be more equal. Which, to me isn't surprising due to how my mom is, but may to the idea of a strong protestant Christian many have in their head.

I explained it's a very popular trope. Personally? I'm 50/50 on it. I'm up for a little "be mine" and "you're all mine" but it's just so overpowering. It's hard to find the werewolf as the sub, or without the power play.

Mom and I ended up talking about our various reader woes, her in the Christian fiction and general fiction world, and I in the fanfiction and fandom world. And the monsterfiction community.

We both spoiled ourselves by reading really good books, or for me fanfiction, and good books because my father is a Sci fi buff and has a massive collection of some beautiful stories. And also I'm autistic and if I don't think a story is good near the start I can't finish it. I can't hate read anything.

My mom and I bonded over something I didn't expect, the lead up. Mom enjoys tasteful scenes, or as she says "closed door" or fade to black sex scenes. We both love the romantic tension when written well. That's why I tend to seek out kink stuff. The lead up is more necessary. But I've never really enjoyed the sex part of smut.

And worse sometimes people stop trying during the sex scenes. Like the writing quality drops because "why try the people reading already got excited, they know what to do."

I personally love reading sexual tension, I love the kissing and the rubbing and the wanting. I love reading about the hot and bothered. But I don't like reading about genitals and I never have. Kink, especially those with unusual eroginous zones tend to focus more on that. Also monster fiction, if it is with really weird monsters, will use unique situations and open up to some amazing writing. I even skim past the actual sex scenes half the time. But if you write good lead up, I'll probably give it a look.

Mom has started to develop the "pickiness" some of us fandom lovers have as she gets older, and we bonded over the wish for more of specific things without being able to find it. Me with empty tags, her with genre issues.

Because the best stuff is hard to categorize, which is cool. But it sucks! Because it's really hard to categorize and find more of. We make it work.

But I think it was a really interesting conversation.

[paranormaltheatrekid]

01 for campfire confession, please? I'd like to hear your thoughts.

sorry it’s late I was visiting my friend

ship it because of the fanfiction

thoughts: my thoughts are that I think that it is a good ship. (wow. I wrote a real sentence this time. Yay me.) I very much believe that they go to the same church and are close, so it makes sense to me. I also just like queer readings of the Chasity family in general.

what makes me happy: I enjoy reading about them. I also really like the ship name, it’s creative. It makes me picture them at abstinence camp together, which is cute.

What makes me sad: say it with me folks: they’ve 👏never👏interacted

Can’t think of anything that annoys me. I also don’t have anything I look for specifically. Sorry to be boring.

Who else I would like them to end up with: Karen with Mark I suppose. Honestly I don’t have a whole lot of thoughts on them as a ship. They are silly though. Wait hold up I remember people ship her with Shapiro. I like that too. I really do like Boy Jerry and Girl Jeri’s relationship because they are also silly. Girl Jeri deserves better tho. I’ve seen someone write Girl Jeri/Webby and it rocked (haha like virginity)

My happily ever after for them is running away into the woods together. Living in the woods with your gf away from heteronormativity and purity culture is like the lesbian dream. (Trust me I’m a lesbian) maybe they’ll kill some people too.

girl jeri little spoon. karen big spoon. Jeri wants to feel loved and Karen wants to hold Jeri in her arms.

When they were younger, their favorite activities was making smores at camp and going to bible studies together. When they are older, they spend their time together baking and burying bodies together.

[divkazkdovikde]

diary entry, monday, 8th of july 2024

guess who came back from the deepest pits of hell to the world of living

i have no idea when was the last time i stopped to think about and reminiscent on my current daily life, new stuff, what was i up to and shit like that, everything is going so so fast and like 99% of time i have no idea what am i even doing. i’m tired, i’m struggling, i’m getting better and i keep getting up every day and that counts

the hell exams period was? my days pretty much consisted of school-work-sleep (if the derranged fucked up not-routine i was pulling off can be called that) on repeat.

- i started working in a coffee shop (real fancy shit- specialty coffee from the forest, boss is a little fucking arrogant bitch (she’s a joke fr) but colleagues are great tho) (it also made me a coffee snob- my greatest nightmare came true) so i’m living the ultimate college experience now

- when i was not at work i was deep down buried in school stuff, and i also went through this four weeks of school internship during the exams, since i refused to complete it in summer, which made me absolutely exhausted to death (had to wake up really fucking early for it) and the studying couldn’t go any slower.

- so i was sleep deprived, frustrated, annoyed and oversensitive for like two months straight (gay) the only people whose companny i could stomach without worrying about my social battery were my flatmate (we were absolutely in it and dying together, shout out to her for always knowing exactly what am i going through) and our friend from highschool (she’s the best, shout out to her for having all those study dates with me and motivating me to productivity, you’re a real one babe, and the girl walks for mental health after almost every session) (and shout out to star girl for even if so far, still always here (if you’re reading this, thank you, you are the best and i’m very grateful for you)

the end of the exams were rather fiasco-esque but i got through it, thank fucking god

anyway, to the fun stuff, during the semester, i had this little sidequest going on, which was doing pixel graphics for my friend’s game. mind you, i’ve never done pixel graphics before. but it was absolutely a fun thing to learn and do. i didn’t think i would enjoy it as much as i did

i also quite lived the social life, some events i enjoyed more than other, but it was lovely anyway. met some new people, saw some of my favourite people too, family time was there as well

culture wise it was not boring either, galleries, trips with friends, exploring the big city, etc etc, you name it

had my birthday somewhere in between too (broke the “i always cry on my birthday because something always fucks up and that’s why i hate them” curse)(got some of the best gifts ever too, like i’m actually so emotional, the best of them all? the new abnormal (my favourite album ever) vinyl - honestly fuck my flatmate for that, i will never top that gift)

i also kind of stole my mother’s old camera (she wasn’t using it anymore, shame on her, honestly) so i’m currently learning how to work with it

got new tattoos

i became an insane plant mom, i have so much of them now fr. two of my plants died, i really tried to save them tho, rip. and another one’s really sick now and i’m getting desperate, because i have no ideas on how to save her left. but the rest is good well and thriving

i haven’t been able to read much lately, if i finally could find the time for it, there was no energy left, so it was a bit weak on that front. but, i did read something, if i have some czech babes here - srpny, jakub stanjura (trust me, it will ruin you, it’s really good) and i started to rereading the trials of apollo (never finished it in the first time, so that’s what the goal now) and i absolutely stopped reading fanfictions (a tragedy, really, i miss it) and i haven’t played any game in weeks either (miss that too). i’m currently trying to catch up those things, since i have a bit more time sans the school

even though i haven’t got time for much of my hobbies lately, i did manage to develop a new one, it’s an obsession at this point tbh. formula one, guys. actually my brother follows it for quite some time now (we can be talking years probably) and i always was like “yeah, whatever.” but somehow, i don’t even know how, these fucking f1 reels kept showing on my instagram and i was like “wow that’s actually kind of funny and definitely cool” and then “let’s go watch dts, to see what the buzz is about” which i enjoyed at first but started to lowkey hate it, seems like a unnecessary soap opera to me, and so i decided to fuck it and just buy the subscription, so i (and my brother in extension, of-bloody-course) can watch the races and other stuff. and i absolutely live laugh love it

- fun fact: it actually helped me a lot to keep motivated. i had it on the background quite often during studying and the buzz, passion, enthusiasm and the fast shit made me buzzing too and kept me motivated, because it sparked my sport’s soul and you know how it is, once a competitor, always a competitor, “if they can drive those fucking fast cars and go through all that, i can study the fuck out of this shit” so yeah, that was and unexpected but rather great turn of events

(i would also like to apologise to everyone i ghosted and/or took ages replying to, here, my friends, my bachelor thesis leader… little miss girl was having a hard time to keep herself going guys, i’ll get better again, i promise, or i’ll certainly try to)

i’m also learning and trying to cook more, i never was really bad at it, but i also never cooked much, so i would like to improve my skills and experience. it always takes my mind off things and i find it quite therapeutic, so yeah

also my reading goal is waiting for me and i can’t wait to get back to the stack of unfinished/unread books again

i have my summer mostly planned out, going to visit some cool places too, can’t wait

i wish i could say i’m happy but life is still playing chess with me and i’ve always been terrible at chess no matter how many years i went to the chess club. but yeah well, you gotta keep going right? try to look out for yourself, keep fighting and stuff like that huh? i’ll be alright, we all will

summer’s here guys, let’s enjoy the shit out of it, i had enough of survival mode

+ current music obsessions:

- touch tank - quinnie

- so high school - t swift (dunno how that happened, smh, it’s so bad fr, but i’m vibing, let the girl vibe)

- gasoline - måneskin

- bon appétit - katy perry (yep)

- moth to a flame - swedish house mafia, the weeknd

- stargazing - myles smith

- birds of the feather - billie eilish

also my favourite playlists lately here: f1 vibes , summer vibes and sunset vibes

[userkoo]

this site is so sensitive when i mention tae and jk together. like i even saw a tiktok naming their fav pairings and for everyone it was fine but when it was taekook they had to disclaim it was (pLaToNiC) was that not implied by the rest of your list?? ppl are so scared to mention them at all but if he's with another member its fine. its annoying and ppl are so transparent

i actually don't think tumblr is a primary suspect among the list of platforms where people move weird about taekook,.. but i'm speaking as someone in a little bubble of mutuals who are normal people lol. i also have never ventured onto the hellscape that is the bts stan side of tiktok so i can't speak on that either (besides seeing screenshots of people on there calling normal behaviors from jungkook 'red flags'... oof.) most of the bullshit, in my experience, stems from twitter where, like you said, even a simple mention of them hanging out together can end up with people accusing you of being a 'shipper' or a 'diet solo.'

this is going to be rambly so i'm putting it under a read more for the sake of not clogging people's dashes, but here are some of my thoughts on fandom culture/shipping in general:

oh real quick for for transparency sake, i'll start this off by saying: 1. i don't care about the relationship status of any of the bts members. they're single to me unless they officially and publicly state otherwise without any privacy invading force involved. 2. i have no problem with fans thinking/implying bts members are queer. lgbt fans finding comfort and comradery in their favorite people isn't a bad thing. :)

now for the actual post~

the fan dynamics on twt are so different and if you even mention taehyung and jungkook in the same sentence or say that they're very obviously close friends, you might end up on some of those 'defend [insert member here]' accounts where they encourage people to block and report for the slightest of 'offenses.' and like you mentioned in your post, that's over people talking about them platonically!! or over people who simply read fic without ever insinuating they think they're actually dating.

the puritanical culture that exists in very large parts of the bts fandom (and was present in the 1d fandom as well) is so weird to witness. we can all have differing opinions on whether or not rpf is 'good' or not, but unless someone is sending fanfiction to bts personally... it is harmless. and it will always exist. you will never enter into a fan space where independent, 'non-canon' content isn't being created by fans... and why would you want to? so much of fandom culture and history is about creation (and is also super lgbt centric!!)

in my opinion, the only people who still get up in arms about shipping discourse in 2023 are those under 18 or those who have no previous fandom experience. after stanning harry styles since 2012, i have heard the 'gay rumors made them drift apart!!!' argument so many times that it is genuinely nausea inducing. (and my opinion on that is... if you are that turned off by people possibly thinking you're queer to the point where it makes you end an important friendship, you either weren't very close to begin with or you're homophobic. likely a combination of the two. gay rumors are not, and never will be, offensive. they are not something you need to protect your fave from. why is this the argument so often touted by fans? why would you WANT your favorite person's self image to be so fragile that they end friendships over rumors? and that's not even getting into the fact that skinship and performance is built into the literal DNA - lol - of kpop...)

like. maybe i'm just too old to care now but i genuinely could not give less of a fuck if people think jk and taehyung are in a relationship. i do not care. they're both beautiful people who are clearly fond of each other. do any of us know how deep that fondness runs? nope! and we never will! and that's more than okay because these are grown men with personal, private relationships that we will never be privy to... as it should be. as long as boundaries are respected, i don't care what people think to be true.

can shippers get overzealous? for sure. do the people who analyze their every move need a new hobby? most definitely. but i think it's more than obvious now that the people who go to insane lengths to invade their privacy are stalkers or people trying to dredge up dating rumors between them and women.

it gets especially transparent when you have videos and rumors online about bts members dating people they've never interacted with publicly (using 'liskook' as an example, there are youtube videos with 10million views about them. one posted ten hours ago has 52k views) but i never see them condemned with the level of vitriol i see people using when it comes to jk and taehyung. is that not weird?

idk man. there's no concise ending to this post. fandom culture just intrigues me which is why i have so much to say about all this. it's especially interesting to me how it intersects with queer culture - or directly opposes it.

[fashionablyenigmatic]

Jesus Dionysus and James have a chat.

James was alone in his apartment, staring at the couch, imagining Jesus and Dionysus sitting there. Jesus, predictably, looked annoyed.

“I don’t know why you feel the need to replace me with him,” Jesus said, gesturing toward Dionysus, who was swirling his wine like he was trying to seduce it. “His followers were just as problematic as mine.”

James sighed. “That’s the point, though. Your followers are currently problematic. And I know it’s not your fault—you’re all peace, love, and harmony—but they’re out here trying to force the world into this rigid, homogenous mold.”

Dionysus perked up. “Better not tell them about the homo-genius. They’d lose it.” He poured more wine into Jesus’s glass, his grin almost predatory.

Jesus swirled his glass, staring into it like he expected an answer. “I get it. I do. But you can still believe in me, can’t you? Wasn’t I there for you when you were a kid? You still care about your fellow humans. And you know hell isn’t real, right? I’m fine being a… personification of a generalized belief system.” He paused, frowning. “Wow, that’s harder to say out loud than I expected.”

James shrugged. “Yeah, probably best not to think too hard about your existence as a personification. But my problem is that believing in you means buying into this whole ‘you died for humanity’s sins’ thing. And let’s be honest—you didn’t. You died so God wouldn’t smite us for not meeting his ridiculously high standards. It’s like walking up to a homeless guy and saying, ‘Hey, you don’t have to live on the street. Just get a job!’ Then smiling and walking away.”

Jesus groaned, but before he could respond, Dionysus laughed so hard he nearly spilled his wine. “I’d drink to that,” he said, raising his glass.

Jesus smirked. “Well, you and I both know I’d never do something like that.”

Dionysus leaned forward, tapping the edge of his glass. “Maybe not, but here’s the thing: even outside the church’s rules, you have requirements. You expect people to work toward some ‘higher self.’ And James here—poor guy—he keeps seeing that awful image of you bleeding out on the cross and feeling guilty.”

Jesus groaned louder this time. “But he doesn’t have to see that image of me. Frankly, I don’t even like that image because…”

“It freaks people out,” Dionysus finished.

“Exactly,” Jesus said, gesturing with his glass. “It’s not like I was hanging there on the cross, reviewing all of human history and sorting out humanity’s sins as they happened. Could you imagine? Watching some idiot get off to…what do you call it? Mpreg fanfiction about Harry Plotter and Draco Malfoy?”

Dionysus doubled over, nearly falling off the couch, and James couldn’t help but laugh along. Jesus gave a reluctant smile.

When James finally caught his breath, he leaned forward. “Listen, there’s just too much baggage with believing in you. You’re an amalgamation of several gods and demigods with the same story. But now you represent this patriarchal system that uses you like a weapon. It’s always, ‘Be nice to the fascists, or else.’”

Dionysus raised a hand. “And meanwhile, I was the god of rebels, and even I ended up in the societal pantheon.”

“Yeah,” James agreed, “but modern culture reclaimed your wild side. Now we see you as nonbinary, like Baphomet.”

As if summoned, Baphomet strolled through the living room, one hoof clicking softly on the floor. They raised a hand in greeting. “Yo.”

Jesus blinked, then shrugged. “Alright, alright. If working with a god of chaos helps you become a better person, go for it. Just… remember some of my lessons now and then.”

James smiled. “Don’t worry, I will. I can’t escape them even if I wanted to. I just wish people embraced the side of you that whipped the sellers out of the temple instead of the serene white dude.”

Jesus groaned and rubbed his temples. “Ugh, I hate that image of me.” He sighed and drained his glass. “Something’s gotta give soon.”

Dionysus raised his glass. “Amen to that.”

They both disappeared, leaving James alone with his thoughts and whatever was playing on TV at the moment.

[chornayadrakoshig]

I feel like the fact that ao3 is an archive definitely affects the fandom culture when it comes to criticism. It doesn't have promotios, reccomendations and other things that are more social media-y.

A lot of people in the comments talk about ff .net but my "formative years as fanfic writer" were even wilder.

My experience with fanfiction didn't start with ao3 or even ff .net - after using a few forums & blogs I moved to ficbook somewhere around 2014 (and left it about 1.5ish years ago, slowly moving my works to ao3 now)

And that site has (or had on the past, at least) multiple built-in systems for pointing out errors and giving criticism. Like you can select a fragment of the text and send the author a message about a typo or something, separately from comment section (which was helpful, occasionally, but a lot of the times annoying because apparently a lot of people can't read :) so many times I raised my eyebrows thinking why someone assumed THAT verb somehow made more sense). Or like if you pay to get your fic promoted the comment field changes to promt readers to give a separate star rating for characters, plot, etc. I also remember it having some kind of review exchange event where you'd be prompted to critique a fic you got randomly assigned (which was.... an experience.....).

While I think the general idea wasn't bad, the issue is that a lot of people don't know how to give criticism even if you ask? There are people who think if they hate something in the fic it's their right and duty to tell the author how awful it was just because. And they will be condescending and sarcastic about it. Imho that's not "constructive criticism". There are people who misread something and start to write paragraphs of criticism based on the fact that wasn't even in the text (one of my fics was mostly set in 1976, and one commenter left a whole essay on how the MC's clothing I described wasn't considered appropriate for beginning of 1960s. None of the events were set in the 60s)

And social media experience around that website focused A LOT on criticism at some point. Before on-site critique exchange existed you could find groups online for receiving critique on this site. Around 2016ish there was a boom of online "schools" for ficwritters where oftentimes people barely older then their students, maybe in their early 20s, would tell people how shameful it is to write self-insert fics or god forbid someone would think your OC is Mary Sue like it's the biggest sin on earth or just quoting some "writting tips for beginners" that they found online.

Unfortunately a lot of people who think they are giving critique are just telling their negative opinion with a sense of superiority and for some reason can't live by "don't like don't read" approach.

I'll be honest, I was perpetuating a lot if this culture too. And not only in term of comments. When moving my works to ao3, I looked through a few of my "essays" and "character analysis" and genuinely thought "damn what a sarcastic bitch you were who hurt you". I left one or two that I thought are still kinda funny at least and I've never reposted most of them.

Tbh I'm not really equipped to talk on the topic of "constructive criticism". I never learnt how to properly critique someone's work. Sure, I might be able to spot some typos; maybe some knowledge about analysing fiction is still boinking around my head since high school graduation (10 years ago, damn) - but I've never learnt how to _critique_ written work besides the tips on the internet like "say one nice thing then critique then one nice thing at the end! like a sandwich!!" and who knows how far it is from the actual critique. Definitely not me.

I just saw a Tik Tok that said writers on AO3 are not looking for constructive criticism in their reviews. I have no audience on this platform so I have to know if this is true? I've always left my pros and cons when reading a fic and now I'm concerned that the authors didn't like that.

Yeah writers are Not looking for criticism, constructive or otherwise. Unless they specifically ask for it, it’s considered rude and honestly a bit hurtful. In the least bitchy way possible, don’t do that. It’s unwanted.

[finsterhund]

Hoping this will be my last update on the situation ever because all things considered not knowing he was still up to his bullshit felt good but a little reminder not to believe everything you read on the internet. Zachary (bitter HoD stalker guy) finally got banned from Twitter for violating the terms of service (five years too late if you ask me and under the new Musk ownership no less) and he's since moved over to Reddit and is posting bizarre made up fake "facts" about Heart of Darkness and trying to pass off his own fanfiction idea as if it were an actual sequel Eric was working on. Why? Idk man. It's hard to take seriously at this point. Reddit ecosystems generally don't appreciate this special breed of Twitter culture though and I was far from the first person to call him on his bullshit by the time I got around to seeing it on my feed.

He actually had the nerve to complain I showed up because he, a guy who used to exclusively use Twitter previously, posted lies about a niche topic I'm interested in, in a community I frequent, on a site I was using for fucking years before I even knew who the hell he was. I check Reddit almost every day. I used to make burner accounts and write nosleep stories. (None were good and taking credit for them ruins the fun so don't ask) I fucking run the subreddit for the game for fucks sake. I don't know what you expected. Like going to a playground and getting annoyed that there's children there.

It's just so fucking strange to me that he's fucking writing up fake sequel synopsises though? I just really hope he doesn't eventually end up admitting to liking the game or something because as I've grown and matured I've learned that a shitty person hating something you like will always be better than a shitty person liking it and I don't think I'd be able to move past the unrelated to HoD shit he's been part of over the years. He tried to lie and spin a false narrative so I evidently looked up stuff I hadn't thought about in a long while and it's hard to believe he was responsible for it all.

This is after the Godzilla weirdo in the Stephen King subreddit came back a bit ago too. I feel like those two would be great friends.