How to Plan a Simple Heist: A Guide for the Current Sorry Soul Leading the Fakes
A/N: Here’s my fic for the Achieve! Zine that I was a part of! If you enjoy, I highly recommend the rest of the zine! As always, reblogs and comments are super appreciated!
AO3 Link
A man stands outside the tall marbled columns of the Maze bank, sunglasses reflecting the heat of a Los Santos day. The city bustles with movement; cars, people, planes soaring up above. But this man is stopped, considering the imposing structure in front of him as the doors swing in and out with people.
He leans back against the parking meter, hands buried into the pockets of his brown leather jacket, a wolf snarling on his back. No one cares to look at him and he doesn’t care to look at them. After a moment he adjusts his baseball cap a little lower over his brown curls and his eyes flicks to his watch. His mouth twists as he counts down the seconds before he pushes himself up and heads inside.
Pushing past the glass doors, his shoes echo across the marble floor. A second story balcony hangs above and he spares a glance up. There, a lithe man in a tailored suit stands. His blonde hair shines in the light, matching the gold around his neck and wrist. He stares down at the people going about their days alone. The two men catch eyes. Smirks pull at both of their lips and just as suddenly the man up top slips back into the crowd. And the man below continues his march to the teller's window.
“What can I help you with?” the teller says pleasantly, unknowing of the plan already unfolding. The parts already moving into place.
The man in leather grins and starts to hand a note-
“Then you seduce the bank teller!” Joe interrupts with a grin, a hand slamming down on the wood table that is sprawled with various maps, scrawled notes, and surveillance photos all centered on Maze Bank.
“What?” Alfredo laughs, others in the room bursting into giggles. “Why do you always want to fucking seduce the marks on the heist?”
“I can do it! Let me try!”
“No,” Trevor sighs, hand pinching the bridge of his nose. This planning session has already gone on for two hours and they’ve yet to even properly plan getting to the vaults. “No seducing. Michael just passes a note saying that this is a robbery.”
“That’s so boring though,” Joe huffs.
“He’s right, we can do better than a note,” Lindsay nods.
Trevor sighs, able to tell the battle he’s losing. “Then just tell the bank teller you’re robbing them. The note was the finesse.”
“Am I supposed to ask to go in the back or hold up the front?” Michael says, turning them somewhat back on track.
“You are the distraction. Your job is to keep the focus on you, while the others are setting up in the back-“
A large, detailed painting hangs in one of the meeting rooms, something expensive even if the subject is hard to make out with the mesh of colors. The room sits empty, silent until the painting creaks. Thudding against the wall, once, twice, third time it knocks off the hanger and clatters to the ground.
Replacing it is a hole with two figures inside. Both are dressed in all black with masks covering their faces and slip out with bags of gear on their back.
They move swiftly with practiced ease. They pause at the doorway and one leans out to listen. They listen closely and then give a quick hand motion and they both move out. Running down the hallway.
The camera flickers, red light blinking. Connected is a screen that shows the figures moving around. Then the screen flickers; the figures disappear mid walk. The screen shows just an empty hallway. Leaving silence and a lulled peace once again.
“How come Matt always gets to be the man in the chair?” Alfredo huffs, leaning back as Trevor is again trying to explain.
“Because I’m the hacker. That’s what I do. Besides, you said you wanted to be the one in the tunnel.”
“I did say that,” Alfredo laments. “Joe convinced me on the outfits.”
“Black and slim is sexy,” Joe grins. “And we get to use the big drill.”
“The hole will be made before the heist even begins,” Trevor reminds, pointing out their floor plans and maps that were labeled with the drill spots.
“Ky and I get to do it, right?” BK beams. “Pretty please, Trevor? We can sneak around and easily get it in place.”
“What?! No, I want to!” Jeremy protests. “Matt taught me how to use it!”
“Cmon, Jeremy, you know Team Friendly Fire has it covered,” Ky cuts in.
“Ky and BK can do it, Jeremy we’ll need you for setting up other parts of the heist,” Trevor says.
Ky smirks and sticks her tongue out at Jeremy, who returns the gesture.
“Now let’s focus and talk about how we’re getting out-“
The back door bursts open, several figures flooding out into the back alley. Voices shout and the wail of sirens isn’t far off. But the figures don’t stop moving, each carrying a bag draped around them. Cash sticking out from every stuffed pocket.
The figures bolt, taking off running in the same direction. All sharing bright grins as they run with their steal.
“We’re almost at the pickup spot,” one shouts, tapping a small piece in their ear.
“I’m right there,” a voice responds, a curl of red hair shouting over the loud roar of a helicopter. A shadow crosses over them, a cargobob hovering as the wind rips around.
Below the machine, there was a chain hooked to something hanging below it. A bright pink plastic box, swinging, with words on the side of it reading-
“We’re not using the fucking Porta Potty!” Michael shouts as Lindsay bursts into giggles.
“It’s the perfect plan, Michael!” Lindsay defends. “Listen-“
The room floods with bickering and teasing and complete lack of focus as they battle out the pros and cons of the portable toilet. Trevor lets out a deep, but fond, sigh. He knows when they need to focus they will. In the meantime, though, it's like herding cats.
Out of the corner of his eye, Trevor spots Jack give an amused smile as she lounges back in her chair. A knowing smile, having seen the chaos of these people the longest. But when she locks eyes with Trevor, she gives a subtle nod. An encouraging look, a deep set of trust. Trevor feels his nerves settle, looking back over all the maps and notes. All the work they’ve already put in. Trevor takes one more deep breath and gives a sharp whistle to get the room’s focus.
“Alright,-“ he says, leaning over the table and looking them all in the eyes. “Let’s take it from the top one more time.”
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