#except the dogs

[greenglowinspooks]

To be honest. DCxDP where the reason Danny meets the bats is Ace the Bat-hound

Like, just think about it for a second. Danny is in Gotham for college, or maybe he just moved out to find a city where having mad scientist parents isn’t actually that unusual.

He can see ghosts.

The ghosts know this.

Now he’s getting harassed left and right by spirits trying to get closure. Fine, whatever, most of them are a one-and-done type deal, and the amount of ghosts trying to get his help steadily decreases.

Except for this one very stubborn dog.

It just keeps showing up and leading him to crime scenes! He doesn’t know how many “anonymous tips” he can call in to the cops before they trace his phone! And this dog, this incredibly good boy, will not stop trying to help the city. He’s never met anyone with such a strong sense of justice, let alone a dog. Can dogs even have a moral compass?

And so Danny just accepts the fact that Ace isn’t going anywhere and becomes his reluctant sidekick/dedicated medium. He leans into the whole thing, dressing up in a mix of traditional magic-user attire and accessories that pay homage to the ghost dog.

He becomes somewhat well known. The psychopomp detective following around the shadowy figure of a German Shepard? That’s unusual! That’s weird! I mean, it’s not the weirdest thing in Gotham, sure, but he’s a new vigilante and he’s got a ghost dog that people can only see when it’s around him. Someone’s gonna notice.

Damian, as Robin, is the first to reach out to him.

Ace doesn’t know Damian but he does know a Robin, and while this isn’t his Robin, he’s still friendlier than usual. Danny’s panicking because oh god the bats are here and also is this kid gonna steal my ghost dog, Damian is absolutely delighted by Ace, and Ace is just happy to see a Robin again.

Damian decides that the psychopomp isn’t a danger to anyone, and there’s no reason to put this encounter into his reports, really, and perhaps Danny can help with some of his cases in the future.

Danny is sweating bullets because Damian basically tells him that he’ll keep him secret as long as he gets to play with Ace. Ace is happy that he’s finally getting some bat affiliated crime-fighting assistance.

And so, Danny is now both Ace AND Damian’s reluctant assistant. At least whenever he’s in trouble, he can always call a middle schooler to help him.

(Is Robin even in school? He’s out patrolling damn near every night, and he stays out late as hell. Does he have a bedtime? He should.)

Eventually it gets to the point where Damian is going over to Danny’s house. When he first sees it, he has a damn bitch you live like this moment, to which Danny responds that not everyone has the money to afford a nice place. Damian counters that he could at least take the time to clean up, and Danny replies that he’s working, going to school, and being a vigilante assistant to a ghost dog, something’s got to give.

Danny nearly has a heart attack when he checks his bank account the next day and sees that someone transferred him 10,000 dollars.

And so they get into a routine. Danny and Damian fight crime with Ace at night, and occasionally Damian stops by during the day to play with Ace and have Danny help with his homework.

(Damian is smart enough to do it on his own, but some of the instructions are written incredibly confusingly, and he would never admit to needing help to his family. Danny is just glad that the kid is in school and cares about his education, blissfully unaware that he’s basically emotionally adopted him.)

Damian is used to being in Danny’s company.

Eventually, when going over a case with the family, Damian absentmindedly remarks that he’ll have to ask Danny about some of the clues that they might be missing. Nightwing asks who he means and Damian makes a face like he just swallowed a lemon.

Cue shitstorm.

Who is “Danny?” Why is Damian willing to ask for help from anyone, much less someone outside of the family? Does he know who Damian is? Has Damian been compromised? What the hell is going on?

Damian now has to explain that Danny is the psychopomp with the ghost dog who he might have met hunted down while on patrol and conveniently not mentioned, but he’s not a bad person, really, and he lets him play with Ace, and he’s been quite helpful on certain cases due to his ability to talk to ghosts.

Bruce insists that the family meet Danny. Damian, hoping that he won’t just skip town the second he hears the news, relents.

Danny is surprisingly eager to meet the bats, considering his earlier fears.

Damian, blissfully unaware of what’s coming, sets a time and place to meet.

Once everyone is there, he gives Bruce the earful of a lifetime.

Robin is in middle school! Danny knows that there’s no way to stop the boy from going on patrol, but you could at least shift his schedule so he gets enough sleep on school nights! Does the Bat even know where he is half the time?! (No) And why isn’t he comfortable asking his family for help with both cases and homework? Did they ever even notice how much time he was spending at Danny’s house? If Danny was a bad person, he could have seriously hurt the poor boy! Shame on you!

Nightwing is mortified that Damian didn’t trust him enough to tell him about any of this. Red Hood is laughing his ass off, because yeah Danny is making good points but he’s also chewing out the literal Batman. Tim is recording the whole thing. Steph is delighted by the absolute gall of this Danger Twink™️, and already planning to add him to several groupchats. Damian is more embarrassed than he’s ever been in his entire life.

You, he points to Nightwing, did your academic life feel supported when you were a Robin? Nightwing is too stunned to speak. Red Hood, eternal shit-stirrer, says that oh, we all prioritized patrol over our education, that’s just how it is. Red Robin actually dropped out of high school to avoid distractions, did you know that?

Danny honest-to-god shrieks at this.

He finishes his angry rant and leaves, everyone too stunned to stop him.

And as it turns out, Tim wasn’t the only person recording the whole thing.

The entire internet is blowing up with Psychopomp The Danger Twink™️’s rant. People are taking sides. Things are getting messy. Red Hood literally admitting on-camera to previously being a Robin is somehow not the main focus here.

Eventually someone connects some dots from the video, as well as stories circling the internet about the psychopomp. A ghost dog named Ace, who is the literal only reason that the psychopomp is fighting crime at all, which seems incredibly fond of Nightwing and Robin.

A crime-fighting dog who wants constant attention from both the current and original Robin.

Oh my god, Ace the Bat-hound died and became a crime-fighting ghost.

And, somehow, that’s still not the strangest thing going on in Gotham.

[fruitsyrups]

This probably isn't entirely in character but it's based on an exchange I had & I thought it would be silly with these two

[spyxfamily-yapper]

I love how Twilight both severely underestimates and overestimates Bond's abilities and intelligence. Like one moment he's like

"this dog is so weird he's just a silly little dog guy he's not built for all this attacking stuff maybe it's too much for such a goofy little doggie. why is he grabbing people??? he must not understand me at all hoho. I guess he needs more training heehee"

and then he's like

"dog. I see you have come here to avenge your brothers and sisters. let us join forces and bring about peace by combining our efforts. I see you have used your acute sense of smell to detect dangers, you are truly a capable partner"

[ahotknife]

the stooges / the dream thieves by maggie stiefvater / phoebe bridgers / how to be a dog by andrew kane / sleepycorvid / mitski / margaret atwood / ethel cain

[markscherz]

do you feel positive, negative, or neutral about inaccurate plastic skeleton halloween decorations? like what's going on with this guy's everything?

you may not know this, but I am something of a specialist on amphibian skeletal anatomy, and this… thing is a sin against my entire field.

Frogs do not have ribs. Where is its pectoral girdle? Why does it have mammal feet? What even happened to its hips? Why does it have SO MANY VERTEBRAE‽ And what in the seven hells happened to its skull? Hypertrophy is one thing, but this… this is just lazy. They seem to have decided to give it a beak??? And the nostril is super far back and also somehow integrated into a bone¿?¿?

What in the name of Eru Ilúvatar is going on‽

[lotus-pear]

doing skk meme redraws instead of sat prep >:)

[brainrotcharacters]

Mothers and fuckers of the ketchup and mustard household (I'm going even more insane than usual)

[figofswords]

sometimes a guy is also a creature. im gonna make a sticker out of him

[makaira-art]

The funniest what-if: Sokka finds The Jasmine Dragon one day and is like “I don’t trust prince angstbender one bit, I’d better keep an eye on him,” and visits every day until he realizes Zuko just wants to do his little job and keep his uncle happy so it slowly just turns into Sokka annoying “Lee from the tea shop” because he knows Zuko can’t do shit about it

[liesweliveby]

no no no okay im making an actual post about this. "I wish he would disappear from my sight but if he does I fear there would be even worse fallout to result" CRINGE EMBARRASSING DEVASTATING DAZAI WHAT do you MEAN "if he does I fear there would be even worse fallout" what is WRONG with you. just admit you don't actually want him to disappear from your sight. you're so cringe. he's so cringe you guys.

[ryann-44]

excuse me sir he asked for no pickles

[a-most-beloved-fool]

has anyone ever made a clip of leeta's sad dog noises from when she thought rom was going to get executed by the dominion, or will i have to do that myself?

Rom: I'm going to die soon

Leeta: whhhhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnneeee

EDIT:

This fucker

apparently you can't add videos when reblogging so i had to just edit it

[mitskiluvr]

of course when you ask akechi to play darts he shows up alone and no one else comes and he picks the hardest difficulty of darts and he also hits perfect bullseyes each turn. is any of this surprising anymore. why am i shocked.

[matoitech]

FEED THE BEAST

[yuyonyu]

Gogol’s unrequited love

[lotus-pear]

lore accurate chuuya canonically drives a 2006 sparkly barbie motorcycle