#esp if you know it's irrational and your brain is bad and you wish you could just throw it off and move on

[notesofarichlycolorednight]

s2ep15 zombizou

*looks into the camera like i'm on the office after the episode ends*

this was a lot, i don't even know where to start and how to formulate my thoughts.

i think i'll start with ms. bustier tho. i think i understand the intent behind her character--are at least the montage of what her character is supposed to demonstrate--but i think they really beefed the landing there. like it's all well and good to think positive thoughts and be kind to your fellow man or whatever, but if the other person is absolutely unwilling to actually try to be kind, i don't think you need to go out of your way to be nice to them.

setting a good example only goes so far. and for some, it won't be enough. they need to understand in a meaningful way how their actions and words may hurt others. and giving them brownie points for sometimes doing the right thing or owning up to their mistakes won't change them. esp if they go back to being mean all the time to others.

and i think the way chloe's character is written is just confused. she does constant heel-face turns, and because this show episodic, she never grows out of it or learns anything from it. she learns nothing from despair bear and she's learned nothing here. you can't expect me to take this character apologizing twice only for her to go back to being just as mean and racist as she was before.

back to bustier tho, i think it's the wrong message to give to people that "she let herself get overtaken by negative emotions" and also for ladybug to correct her and tell it's all hawkmoth's fault. like no! sometimes we do just act like assholes when we're in a bad mood! there's not necessarily wrong with that insofar that's a pretty normal experience to have. obviously we have to learn to temper it and not take it out on others, and we won't always succeed, but that's just fucking life. you apologize and try to do better. and the ppl who love you will give you grace.

as i mentioned before, i think this show could've done something really great with the whole set-up of how akumas take over and work. bc again, showing kids that anyone, at any point, can feel very strong negative emotions. and bc of that, they may act very mean toward others. that doesn't mean they're right to do it, but that also doesn't mean they were wrong for feeling that way. again, insofar as it's a very human and normal experience to feel strong negative emotions. and as long as you have a coping technique that doesn't rely on taking it out on others, it's okay to process and work through those feelings. it's okay to feel that, even if you know it's irrational. bc that's just what feelings are! they're irrational!! it's lizard brain!

i don't know what else i can say about chloe that i haven't already said. but i will say that i fundamentally disagree that bustier didn't punish chloe in some way for defacing a classmate's property. teaching her it's okay to do that will get her into trouble later on in life. that's just not an okay thing to do to anyone's personal property.

additionally, i really hated that people kept saving chloe. that they were forced by the writers to "set a good example" when it's going to do nothing to actually change chloe or her behavior. she's never going to introspect and she's always going to be mean. there's no point and their sacrifices mean nothing. she literally insults kim and rose as they're trying to help her. her sacrifice to save ladybug from chat noir is hollow.

speaking of, yet another instance of chat noir getting brainwashed to help hawkmoth. at least his cataclysm was useful this time, i guess.

i also really wish they had actually done something with everyone talking about how much they believed in and trusted ladybug to save them. this could've been really good narratively, as far as building her up only for her to fail in some way.

this would've been a really good episode where she fails and then has a moment of introspection and gets a new yo-yo and some new powers to defeat this akuma (or new villain if they hadn't been cowards and actually thought past hakmoth).

but no, she saves the day. like always. without the help of chat noir bc he's like half-lamp at this point.

but anyway, the injustice of what happened to marinette and then the narrative forcing her into a weird lesson about "setting a good example" will always piss me off. the whole thing is unfair. and chloe still gets a miraculous for it.

can't believe they really left bustier and chloe on the very top of the effiel tower. do they even know how to get down from there? tho at least chloe couldn't cause harm up there i guess.

[loumauve]

rejection sensitive dysphoria has got to be one of my least favourite anythings ever jfc

[turbocao]

(Sorry I didn't get back to you earlier, I only saw this now!) Anyway, I find your more "feeling centered" way of thinking to be fascinating. As for my experience, the voice in my head literally NEVER shuts up; so, to follow your example, when I feel thirsty my brain immediately starts going like "Ugh I should get up and get something to drink. But I don't feel like now. Omg I'm being so lazy." and so on. Sometimes it's more confused, especially when my brain is rushing and yeah, I wouldn't be able to repeat it out loud too, but most of the time it's as if I were talking. It can defeinitely get exhausting, as you said (esp when I start being really hard on myself sigh) But also many people have told me that I seem to be someone who thinks and ponders a lot, so I'm not sure how universal my experience is. In any case, I don't think that you're not living to your full potential or something, you simply deal with everyday life in a different way I guess! And maybe we see things in a different perspective too; which, again, is something truly fascinating to me (BTW don't apologize for the rant!! I sent you an ask bc I was curious and as u can see im really happy to discuss this, so thanks for sharing ^ _ ^)

Damn, I already feel so bad when I'm being hard on myself, i can't imagine hearing it put into words on top of that

Although i assume it must feel similar, since it's not a third person's voice but your own? Or maybe it doesnt?

Idk, to me it sounds like your way of thinking makes it easier to disagree with your own thoughts/feelings and to be in control of them. But, at the same time, it cant be that different; I think if i was a very irrational person i would have noticed (or been told by someone lol) by now

I also wonder how one way or thinking or the other happen. Like, are we genetically predisposed to think in words or in feelings? Or does it have to do with our enviroment and the way we're raised? or a mix of both? Could i train myself to think in words? Or viceversa?????? i wish the scientific community is able to explain this one day! there is still so much we dont know about the brain... i need to go watch some science divulgation videos on the topic hahahah

[onlyjihoons]

prince!taeil

akutagawahakuryuunosuke said:Hello can i request Prince! Taeil who falls in love with witch who sleeping for a hundred years because shes been waiting for the love of her life waking her up, Taeil accidentally woke her up with singing sweetly for her and after that is up to you^^ thank you~♡♡ hope my plot doesnt confuse you heheh

hello!! i’m sorry if this took so long, i hope you’ll like it:-) and uhh i hope you don’t mind of i do this in bulletpoints/head canons, do request if you want me to redo it❤ and i switched it up a little omg i really hope you’ll like it

omg asdfghjkl

im so sorry this took so long ;-;

i had a really big writer’s block for taeil IDK WHY MY BRAIN LOVES JENO

ok anyways

leggo

so

youre currently 16 years old hehe

16 y/o y/n

ok you’re a witch but it aint any of those yknow

uh

evil ones

you were one of those that casted spells for those that needed genuine help

ok and woah you were one of the more popular and powerful ones the younger witches and wizards practically worship you

anyway

one fine day prince!moontae visits you

because his younger sister was down w leukemia :((

and like it was super duper serious and no medicine could cure her

the royal family didn’t believe in witches except for taeil

so he went to your lil cottage house

and practically begged you and you were like

“omg your highness why are you here? shouldn’t you be doing your prince duties instead of being in this godforsaken place?”

ok a lil background story here

you and prince!taeil were acquaintances

bc your mom brought you along to his 5th birthday party or smth

and you two just became friends instantly

thanks to your mom’s spells

but you guys weren’t exactly the closest bc uk prince duties

but you guys would play in the palace garden sometimes

and he would come to visit you when he was bored

ok

back to the story

“my sister’s down with leukemia, pls save her i beg you y/n!!

you were so shookt that taeil would burst into your tiny cottage to ask for help

“I don’t know,, im not really experienced in this area--”

“PLEASE Y/N I LOVE YOU PLEASE SAVE HER IM WILLING TO MARRY YOU IF YOU WANT--”

“wait what”

that’s when taeil finally realises what he was saying,, and he was like

“let me take that back,, i was supposed to tell you that after you cured my sister”

and you were shookt pt2

because 1. you and taeil were just friends-acquaintances

2. he’s from the freaking royal family that doesn’t even know that you’re a witch

but you still go to the royal school bc well,, witches arent exactly as poor as they seem

and you’re just ok whatever let me cure his sister and never think of what he said again

so you casted some spell on a medicine bottle with some healing concoction

bibbity bobboty boo

and you’re like

“here take this, your sister will get better.”

taeil literally hugs you n you drop your cornical flask in shock

“thank you so much y/n, i really appreciate it”

“no worries, just make sure she eats well after that okay!”

before taeil left he’s like

“just saying, i really meant it when i said “i love you” *winks*”

there goes your weak heart

the next day, taeil sees you in the royal school and he literally backhugged you

and you’re trying to get out of his grasp

“what are you doing moon taeil--- you’re not supposed to do this”

btw he rlly likes it when you call him by his full name

“i love you y/n~”

“nO nononononono let’s just get to history in peace pls”

gif:

“you’re so cute omg”

ya’ll are so cute smh

and also do bongsoon and ahn minhyuk are rs goals af

and one of the royal tutors saw

and reported it to the royal family

well the king wasn’t really pleased that taeil has fallen for “normal” people

so he set taeil up with another royalty

taeil didn’t know that until he came back from school and his father was like

“so i heard you have a girlfriend”

“w-what girlfriend---oh”

“break up with her this instant, i found a wife for you.”

“no, i love her”

“HOW CAN YOU LOVE A NORMAL PERSON! YOU DESERVE SO MUCH MORE!”

at this point taeil couldn’t take it and says

“she treated your daughter, how could you say that to her!”

“what?”

“she’s a witch, father, don’t you understand?”

and that only made the king more angry

“i’m giving you 1 day to break up with her or else you’re banished from this palace and the royal family.”

that left taeil with no choice but to go to your lil cottage and tell you the not so good news

“y/n,, im so sorry we have to break up”

“why?”

“i’m getting married”

your weak heart couldn’t process anything again and you’re just like

“okay...i wish you all the best.”

and you weakly pushed taeil out of your cottage and locked the door

your tears fell out without warning and you were like

sobbing so so so hard

taeil could hear from the other side of the door

but he had no choice so he left

and your irrational mind takes over

you remember your sister telling you that if you drank this purple concoction

to mend your broken heart or smth

but you didnt know what was its aftereffects so you just drank it

ok

your sister came back home and saw you lying on the ground

she PANICKT

and she told your mom and she panickt too

until she saw that bottle of purple concoction on the floor

“sigh why is she so foolish”

naturally the next day you didnt report to school and taeil was so worried

so he asked your fellow wizard rowoon

ya’ll blame carmen for this ok

okok i gotta blame myself too cause rowoon’s so cute ugh

anyway

“uhh why is y/n not in school today?”

rowoon sighed

“she took this purple concoction thingy that’s gonna make her sleep for a hundred years,, it seems like she got rejected by someone or smth”

taeil knows its him so he just kept quiet

“how do you even wake her up?”

rowoon shrugged,

“i don’t know honestly, only her family knows how cause they’re the best at it”

taeil genuinely felt so bad he wasn’t even doing his school assignments properly

fast-forward to the day he’s getting married

he went missing

and his fam was super worried cause how in the world can a wedding take place when the groom isnt even here

he went to visit your lil cottage

and he saw you lying on the couch

his heart shattered

he held your smol hands in his and he cried omg

“why are you so foolish y/n??? do you know how much i love you???”

and all of a sudden he starts singing Without You

because he literally can’t live without you

and bAM YOU WOKE UP

i mean not like shoot up wake up

like slowly opened your eyes

ya’ll i can make lameass puns rn but i’m not gonna be a joykill

and you’re like

“!!! what are you doing here?? arent you supposed to get married??”

“yeah i am, getting married to you”

and he kneels down and proposes to you there and then

“will you be my wife, y/n?”

ofc you said yes

and ofc its a happily ever after

im so sorry if this is crap omg

esp rowoon

ok

i really hope you like it<3