#either because they're. like me. paranoid. Or they're completely misunderstanding that the level of ability to handle things in
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I'm (mostly) keeping Purple Orange and Gold out of this because I haven't been working with them recently, but like. You have. Deus Ex Machina in the way of The Organic Is Machine And He Will Change You To Change Reality, you have Death and War and natural disasters, you have the One to Whom Soldiers Are Sacrificed In War. I'm looking at selves like...
The parts of myself I keep hidden are. all parts, because these are all ultimately halves of aspects and if you suppress an aspect you suppress the aspect... but I see the way I bleed into people. I see the Violent Mother, the one who will bleed your body out on her altar and who tears apart the bodies of the enemy to protect her hatchlings. Ive tried to stay human, but ultimately... this flesh, this soul flesh, eats human bodies. This takes human sacrifices. This tears apart countries, this drives people into psychosis, this pours revelation into eyes that either adapt to handle it or go mad, literally.
The whole part of Godhood is that you are what you are and you actively are it, you actively Be it. This - Dei - is the mergence of opposites which is in itself both the unification of opposites and the rending of similarities in one. Creation Through Destruction.
I'm constantly sitting here grasping at the shredded fabrics I have left (they're shrinking over time) of humanity and. guys. shh. the humans don't like this stuff. Guys, I'm not dancing and infecting people, I'm trying so hard to be quiet down here
#Thing is I know it's easier said than done. Next to no one who thinks ''If I show you my true power you'll explode'' is in any way correct#either because they're. like me. paranoid. Or they're completely misunderstanding that the level of ability to handle things in#spiritual places is so widely varied - you can Explode a few people from thoughts alone and then have no effect on anyone else#because if circumstances arise... well. a being can drown in a few inches of water and also resist being stabbed 10 times to#fight you off. if you even get the chance to be physical with them in the first place. But my god#That's what bothers me. I've had Thoughts Explode times and I think I forget what exactly led up to that#The old men haven't wiped entire locations off maps through allowing themselves to be themselves - or more so it's complicated#When God speaks about openings in time and gives you permission to be his guard dog and bite... that doesn't mean biting#toys afterwards is gonna have the same effect. There's entire causation and fate bodies and such that bring us to kill#Sun rays when focused into a laser melt rocks. that doesn't mean the sun can't touch skin without burning through it#This is why gods play chess: it's not a dick measuring contest. It's a who can use that dick better contest#OK thanks Lev for the insight#~abyssal murmurs#astral diary //#Astral body //#I just have shit playing on repeat in my mind constantly. I have been the apple fallen from the tree and I have seen the way the tree#impales the sky. When I'm a tree ill understand its a dance and not an impaling
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