#edit: Guys this is the most notes i've gotten on a post ever

[ben-adryl]

Obsessed with this genre of pinterest comments

[aethelwyneleigh27]

Realizations

Dad!Simon Ghost Riley x Wife!Reader

Thank you guys so much for 1k, it means the whole world for me because now once did I expect to ever have my page grown this big and not once had I imagined that I would make these many friends here who happened to be so sweet. Also to @connorsui who has been most definitely been waiting the answer to this.

So in honor of 1k, I wrote this long awaited backstory for Ghost and Lovie (Ghostie's parents) that I hope you guys will enjoy since it so happens that our beloved @ave661 has posted another Dad!Ghost render. (Credits to her again for the renders in this post <3) (Sweetie, I love you but that tag on Soap with this render was unnecessary 😭🫶)

To the people who congratulated me, through replies, likes and reblogs, I owe y'all a fat kiss. Mwahhh <333

My CoD Masterlist

Taglist: @wishesforyou @puff0o0 @simp4konig @blingblong55 @azereus @rustic-guitar-notes @shadofireshinobi @09maruchan @anonymuslydumb @skeletalgoats @icarustypicalfall @ghosts-cyphera @cutenote @connorsui @capuccino192 @thesnowurzikdjinn @miss-gms-and-the-rotten-womb @celestialhole @trepaika @starryylies @demidemon09

Warnings/Disclaimers: Stalking (not by Simon), Typical mentions of CoD violence?, Mentions of Simon's past abuse, Creepy guy?? (Not Simon), Mentions of violent and a bit gory descriptions on what wanted to do to the stalker, This is not proofread yet.

With the words of my mother and in true reputation style, Are you ready for it?

I think I need to say this on my account again, English is NOT my first language and all copyrights regarding the plot and some characters within the storyline belong to me. Edit: please help me y'all, I'm losing so much relevance in the span of less than a month, my recent works have gotten nothing and I'm scared that this post proves that. I think I've learned my lesson never to take breaks ever again 😭

Simon never imagined himself in this predicament, always thinking that he'd be out there somewhere, more likely drowning himself in a mission. Not even a home, he thought that if it hadn't for your persuasiveness to interact with him back then then he'd still be back in that shitty apartment complex.

Simon placed his duffle bag on the wood of the porch, the jingling of his keys while he looked for the correct one. He tried his best to make as little noise as possible, it was passed midnight, the last thing he would want was to disturb his wife and daughter from resting.

Hauling the duffle bag in and throwing it on the couch, Simon opt to see what his girls were up to. The giggling and commotion making him smile, you both were supposed to be asleep by now but you were unable to put her to rest because she's just too hyper, so that left you to entertain her by tossing her up and catching her.

"Dada..!" A squeal from the room came, the little one snapping her head to the opening of the door making you look as well, Simon took a peek from the half-way opened door.

Adorable little thing clapping her hands together, pleased that her dad is home while sitting on her mom. She got off, crawling near the edge of the bed with no sense of danger, fortunate for her that her dad is quick with catching her before you could.

You took a deep breath from the shock, looking at your husband and smiling sweetly at him. He asked you not to get off the bed as you were about to, laying next to you he snakes his arm underneath you on your waist and pulls you in.

"I missed my girls.." He said, voice deep and laced with exhaustion, despite that his hold and gaze was the warmest it could be.

"We missed you too Si, so much." You mumbled as your eyes flutter shut to enjoy his touch. You opened them to the sound of a kiss, he kissed the little one's forehead then yours.

Sometimes you vaguely remember the first time he and you met, how it even came to be, this life of domesticity. You, him and your little girl, family is a heavy word for Simon but it was just perfect. This was the family he wanted, the family that he thought he didn't deserve and never would have.

The feeling of coming home to all this started because you were so forgetful, who knew that would be the skill that brought you to him..?

• ──── ✦ ──── •

He emptied his pockets, to the lieutenant's dismay, the box of cigarettes only had one stick left. Since he was going out to smoke it anyway, he might as well get another box from the convenience store nearby. He took his keys from the kitchen counter and headed out, hearing a little commotion that peeked his interest.

Simon never paid much mind to whatever was going on within his apartment building despite the many gossips that were present within the building and the renters. So it happens that the old lady next to his place mentions how they'll be a new tenant in the other apartment next to his.

'Thank God' Simon thought, not that he was particularly religious but he'd been hoping for the longest time for the former renter to leave because let's be honest, who wants to live next to a frat boy with no sense of shame or consideration given that walls are thin? Little did he know he'd be blessed with the next one..

"Oh- I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to.." Simon hears a voice from a little below him, he'd only register what had happened after the fact. Poor girl carrying this box bumped into him a little too hard, so much so that she stumbled back a bit.

You stared up to the 6'4 man blinking, he only shrugged it off to which you smiled to. You tried to make small talk since you were new and it wouldn't hurt to at least know one person right? After all, you were trying to step out a bit of your comfort zone.

"Hi.. I'm [Name].." He only stared at you for a while and replied, "Simon.." you gave him a warm smile before nodding and continuing to bring the boxes into your new apartment while your new neighbor entered the elevator.

You cut the boxes open to start unpacking, a few minutes in and you decided to go on a short break, you rummaged through the small box of food only to find that the recently bought box of tea was empty. You sighed at this, humming as you remembered the convenience store you passed by earlier on the way to the apartment.

Taking your keys and locking the door behind you, you made your way out the complex and walked a few blocks, you only started to notice how late it was with the streetlights coming on even though the sun is only about to set. That's something to get used to, hmm?

The cool breeze hits your skin as you enter, scent of faint instant coffee and many other kinds of foods and products made themselves known. You walked around for a while, checking on what other things you might need but then you tried to remind yourself that you were saving up and on a budget so you took a box of tea and walked up to the register.

You heard footsteps behind you falling in line, after placing the box on the counter, you searched your pockets for your wallet.

'Shit..!' you cursed yourself out mentally trying not to panic as Simon basically watches you frantically patting your pockets, you left your wallet back at the apartment. "You left your wallet-" Simon stated the obvious, "I'll cover it.." there wasn't even a time to argue with him, he just stepped next to you and placed the pack of cigarettes.

"I'll pay you back as soon as we get back to the apartment" You insisted to which Simon only shrugged and declined, it's just a box of tea and it's not like it'll make him go bankrupt, besides he liked your taste, the one you got happened to be his favorite brand.

Since you were headed in the same place anyway, you and Simon walked back together side by side, however one thing you did find odd was when he gently took you wrist and pulled you inward next to him, he was the one now closest to the road.

The walk back was silent, a comfortable silence. A few days after that encounter, you made sure to make an effort for him to know that you appreciated his gesture back at the convenience store. The lieutenant was alarmed by the knock on his door, opening it to find no person but a tupperware filled with buttery shortbread cookies.

He smiled at how tiny the plastic container looked in his hands, how he noticed the note attached "Thanks for the tea, this isn't that special but I hope you like it -[Name]" and the Sanrio themed stickers stuck onto the lid and on the top part of the tiny note. You ran out of sticky notes..

Simon found himself snacking on those cookies later on, oddly enough, they reminded him of his mom.. how she used to love baking back then, it was her way of escape whenever Simon's "father" wasn't home, as well as gardening.

For the first time in a while Simon "Ghost" Riley let out a smile that wasn't smug or a smirk but a genuine smile, one that had warmth to it, one that no matter how hard his mind tried to surppress it, his body refused to.

It didn't take long for you and Simon to get to know each other a bit, little by little it seemed like you two were becoming like friends rather than just neighbors. Let's be honest, who just randomly gives their neighbors weekly baked goods for the sole reason of "just because they wanted to"?

You found yourself always looking forward to the Friday nights chilling with him at the rooftop, mugs with hot tea on hand while he smoked and you read.

Listening to his stupid jokes and remarks that slowly turn into deep conversations and life things. Simon was just... far more open than he's ever been, sure he's talked about his day before to his comrades but never like this, not in a way where he's pouring his heart out, letting you in on how he feels about certain things.

He just got back from a mission, a rough one to be exact. Shoulders slumped from exhaustion as he walked the streets near the apartment complex, no space for his bike so he had to leave it somewhere private while he fidgeted with it's keys.

Simon swore that he almost jumped out of his own body, first instinct being to push you off but he recognized you. He gave you a questioning look, hands were shaking as you so desperately linked you arm around his.

"Hmm?" He hummed, hearing you mumbling something but it was incoherent to his ears.

"Behind us.. please Si, help..." Come to think if it, you never knew when Simon turned into Si. Best believe he knew and still remembers when perfectly.. not the time, there's a serious threat, he didn't look. He didn't need to, guessing by the heavy footsteps, some creep decided to follow you at this hour.

He slowly slipped his arm away from your grip and snaked it around your waist, pulling you in closer to his side while the two of you continued treading closer to the complex. You closed your eyes for a few seconds at a time hoping it would end.

• ──── ✦ A few days later ✦ ──── •

Knocking, frantic knocking was what Simon heard at his door. He wasn't expecting anyone, so why the sudden visit? He opened the door and saw you, Simon knew something was off from the look on your face, you looked pale as if you were sick to your stomach while trying so desperately to catch your breath.

"Can I please come in.. Simon..?" You asked in between breaths. You looked around you, especially behind you, body shivering a bit. He took notice of this and had no hesitation, he pulled you in by your arm. His grip firm but gentle, Simon closed the door behind him.

"Remember that guy who was creeping around when I asked for your help..?" You tried to explain but Simon already knew the moment your mouth opened. You had a stalker.. it was best to call the cops on shit like this.

Simon did his best even though not knowing much about how to comfort someone, he did well in making you feel safe without having to tell you that he'll do so, you just know it in your gut that he'd protect you even if it's just now.

Your breath picked up, slowly backing away from the door as you heard footsteps, clenching your fists and hoping that he didn't see you enter Simon's door. Simon wrapped his arms around you, keeping you in place and from further backing away from the door.

You felt his palm drag up and down your back, it was extremely warm, it stopped for a while. His arm wrapped around your waist, other hand in your hair pushing your head down a bit so it was buried in his chest while you gripped his shirt. Simon felt your trembling body against him slowly relax.

"Deep breaths, angel.." The nickname he whispered would've made you smile under any other circumstance but not right now, you needed to calm your nerves before you panic and make an impulsive decision that could hurt yourself. Like instructed, you followed along Simon's demonstration, pressing his forehead onto yours maybe just a bit too intimately.

You winced at the loud sound of banging on the door, you knew it too well. Simon shoved the handle of his combat knife in your hand, he told you that if anything were to happen, protect yourself with it.

As soon as the Lieutenant swung the door open, you could hear punches, things knocking over and among other things, your stalker's voice.

You'd never forget that, how pitchy it was. Nails on the chalkboard was the best way to describe it, how the man was cackling almost made you annoyed. Simon called on security and the man was dealt with, you came out from hiding and saw both fear and anger in Simon's eyes.

You would never know how much he wanted to tear that man's heart after skinning him alive for even bringing fear into your eyes.

Simon "I care too much for someone I just met" Riley finally saw how his knuckles and fingernails were caked with blood, went off to go wash it and himself.

Getting back to you after half an hour, you reached out for him only for him to withdraw, you looked at him confused and he looks at you with pure guilt..

Your eyes widened in realization, "Oh Simon.. I'm not scared.." you smiled at him. He reached out a shaky hand to you, hesitating before closing his hand back.

You took his hand in yours, bringing it up to your lips and giving it a small kiss, hoping it calms his nerves. Well it did the opposite, it even more overwhelming for him having you kiss his palm while you look up at him, watching you nudge your face into his palm so invitingly.

The way your lashes just sat perfectly atop your cheeks while you slowly blinked up at him. Pressing the same scarred and calloused hands that almost killed a man that night on your face and rubbing the back with you thumb.

Simon had never felt that much guilt before for hurting someone, only after he saw the look in your eyes, which in turn were not something he caused. For the first time in his life too, Simon was comforted by something or rather someone immensely..

[michaels-reality]

I just wanna make a post now cus it seems that people misunderstand my stance when I say the hl//vrai fandom is racist.

I couldn't give two shits if I never got notes or the tags didn't pick up my art or if I had 50 followers or 5000. I'm not calling the fandom racist because I didn't get the attention I wanted. I'm calling the fandom racist because of how I was treated within that fandom.

As a black artist, I've gotten racist remarks about my designs, I've gotten people woobifying or talking down to the characters cus of my designs, and I have a bunch of white people marveling at me because of my designs. It also became apparent to me as where I stood in the fandom, as someone who has been referred to as an "og" or "one of the big hl//vrai blogs". It just became too much for me too bear being in this majority white and nonblack fandom that would constantly uphold this racist atmosphere.

I don't think it's crazy for me to say that all or most of the popular artists in the fandom right now are white. And the designs they have for the science team are all white save for Gordon, who is usually ambiguously tan or drawn inaccurately to be black or a person of color, or maybe Coomer, who has the same issues of Gordon. And when people make only Gordon or Coomer tanner or a person of color, they usually accentuate their more aggressive traits, which is you guessed it! Racist! And I thought it would get better over time but people still favor those designs and I find my work and a lot of other black artist's work getting ignored and not as much attention as those white artists.

Also I've gotten people being very weird about my black designs before :(. I've gotten people wanting to pet, brush the hair, hug, play with the hair, etc my designs because I draw them as black people :|. People ask me why I draw them the way I do? And maybe these comments and questions are people with the best intentions! Maybe they don't wanna cause harm! But that doesn't change the fact that it was racist! Don't ask to pet people's characters or designs because you like their big kinky hair! Don't ask to pet people's black characters! Don't call their hair "floofy" or "fluffy" like we're sheep! Especially if you're white, and I could tell these were coming from white people.

Also I don't wanna create art for this fandom anymore because it is so white. My intention has never been to make art for you guys. My art is meant to reach black people and other people of color! It's always been that! To represent those people who don't see themselves in art often! If creating for this fandom is gonna get me a bunch of white people thinking I'm great for drawing flat black men or white people who look at my art cus "oh! I just think it's pretty!" then I definitely don't wanna be here anymore. I feel like a monkey in a cage, like you're show monkey. I was a token black artist in this fandom and people hold me up and say I'm so great, but I rarely see this greatness in action. For a big hl//vrai artist, I don't get asks about headcanons, I don't get people asking for my art to use as icons, I don't people asking to use my art in amvs or edits, I don't get people asking for my art to use for stimboards or anything like that. I know what I am to a lot of you! Your fucking show monkey! People don't think of me when they think of hl//vrai! I'm just a token! And maybe some of this is my pride talking and me wanting attention but shit! I'm done with it and I'm never making hl//vrai art ever again. I've said before I'll think about it if two comes out but I'm not sure about that even.

I love hl//vrai and I still do. The characters forever mean a lot to me. I don't regret joining this fandom, all my closest friends I met through this fandom and I love them so much! I don't hate white people or anything like that. I think white people can still follow me. But if you read this post and feel like I'm personally attacking you and your friends then maybe reflect on that. Why do you feel called out when people call out racism?

If you only want hl//vrai art from me then consider unfollowing me. I don't make art for you. Thank you.

[doorsclosingslowly]

Ask game: Describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic? Would you ever collaborate with another writer for a story? What’s the last fic you read and do you recommend it? Do you ever get rude reviews and how do you deal with them? Tell us about what you’re most looking forward to writing – in your current project, or a future project?

usually, my fanfics start either with 1) i have an idea while writing another fic that doesn't quite fit there 2) prompts 3) i can't sleep and so i make up a story about a guy i'm currently obsessed with. most ideas stay at that stage, but sometimes i'm really into the premise or i think of an ending that's thematically interesting, and i start making a mental or physical file for that story that i add to every time i idly think it through when i'm bored or can't sleep. then i start writing the beginning, get stuck, start adding the notes into my document or just writing full scenes that are further ahead. i fill in scenes and notes at random until i'm done, i edit, i pass my work to the beta if i'm lucky enough to get a beta interested, i post.

i've cowritten a story with @rainstormdragon and i'm worki8ing on another one with her! i love cowriting and it also forces me to be far more disciplined than i usually am

the last fic i read--- so the thing is, i apparently prefer to red in a fandom i don't write in, so i mostly read baldur's gate 3 fic rn. the last fic i read was a blade shining oh so bright by ushauz and foxflowering, last of a series wherein everything went the fuck wrong for the companions and then a while later, astarion (on the run from his vampire ascendant sire) raises wyll from lemurehood and now has to live with the unremembering shell of his former lover. definite rec, i adore ushauz.

i've never actually gotten a rude review! i write way too niche stuff for that and also got lucky i think. my recommendation for dealing is tearing the rude comment apart in the group chat with the homies, and then probably deleting it.

what i'm most looking forward to writing--- i'm so bad at picking favourites honestly, and i adore every single one of my wips or they wouldn't have become wips. narrowing it down to gríma then so i can give you an answer. i'm looking super forward to part 2 of bride of rohan, the au where saruman tries to take over rohan by marrying off his apprentice gríma into the royal family and then gríma will do some targeted assassinations. anyway in part two, and that's a spoiler, éomer and his "bride" gríma have sex and i'm looking forward to writing a sex scene with gríma's mutilated genitals. i've done my research, i've had my dysphoria meltdowns, i've plotted an emotional arc, but for me writing a scene with its details sometimes introduces fundamental change and i'm curious to see what will happen

thank you!!

[hardestgrove]

A prompt request in case it inspires you. Loving your Btvs/ST stuff and now I can't stop thinking. Mungrove with Vampire Slayer Billy (or The Slayer Billy) and vampire Eddie

HERE WE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO [HEAVY METAL SCREAM] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

rating: G/PG warnings: none really lotta swearing tho words: 2,404 pairing: Billy Hargrove x Eddie Munson

no Ao3 link atm bc i'm lazy and this is just SO bespoke. i genuinely don't know what i wanna do with all the stranger things/buffy the vampire slayer crossover stuff in my head djksdfgdfs. i'll make a post for the ao3 link if i ever make one.

NOTE: this is a TRANSGIRL!BILLY EXPERIENCE! slayer lore is a "girls only" thing which, when you expand that past late 90s mainstream acceptable progressivism i've always interrupted as people who have a female spirit/vibe/essence/whatever the fuck. basically not bio-femaleness but idk like gender vibes. (i'll also say i'm nonbinary myself and the blood i sweat over this gordian knot is ridiculous and this is what i have thus far so we're running with it)

it's also my first time writing a transwoman character so i hope i did right by the girlies. lemme know if anything should be edited!

Billie should’ve slayed Eddie years ago. He was basically the one smudge on her otherwise perfect slayer record. She couldn’t find it in her to do it thought no matter how much she tried. Sure they’d gone at each other a few times, a murder attempt here or there from either side but honestly none of it was all that serious. Their fights always seemed to fall apart though by the end so at this point they just didn’t bother with it really.

If she was being honest there was more to it then just that. For a dead guy Eddie was full of life, bright and charming and just so excited about things. Billie spend so much of her life hunting things down, being hunted, beating the shit out of things, getting the shit kicked out of her, killing things and trying not to get killed back herself. It was dark and lonely most of the time, even if she’d never trade it back for her old life it didn’t mean she didn’t wish she had more in her life than death. And while she’d never admit it to a soul, Eddie made her feel alive.

The majority of vampires seemed stuck in time but while Eddie’s style hadn’t changed much since the 70s, he was different. He was handsome with big brow doe eyes, lean bodied with a wavy brown shag he hadn’t changed in like, 20 years, but still looked really good on him. But he was dynamic in a way the others weren’t. His look wasn’t stagnation, it was preference. Billie had always liked how his hands where bigger than hers, even if it was just by a little. He’d somehow talked her into letting him give her some guitar lessons (yes dumb idea vampire near neck, she knew this. We’ve already established the Eddie weak spot here though) and she couldn’t stop coming back to how long and pretty his hands were, how they covered hers nicely when he helped her work out all the strings and movements.

Eddie had a band — of course — and it was a actually pretty good. It was kind of a shame Eddie’d been turned, he was really talented, if he’d lived he could’ve really gotten famous. Now that he was a vampire though he was pretty much regulated to the small stages only, though he was actually pretty big on the supernatural music scene. Much to her chagrin Billie was starting to feel like a groupie. She tried to catch as many of his shows as she could for years now. And yes, okay — she was a little starstruck. Eddie had seen all her favorite bands in concert when they were making some of her favorite albums, he’d jammed with Metallica when they were hot off Kill ‘Em All. They liked all the same music and Billie lived for music. Eddie was, frankly, kind of a real rockstar in the demon world, like their best kept secret from the humans when it came to rock. Watching Eddie play was electrifying. He was gorgeous and powerful on stage, totally in his element. She didn’t get why he was still hanging out on the Hellmouth, LA was only two hours away, he’d do so much better there.

They were doing a cover of “Am I Evil” by Diamond Head and Eddie was practically crooning it at her where she sat at the bar. She blushed in spite of herself. He was such a little shit, always pulling shit like this with her. She stayed in her seat and she didn’t look away however, that’d be admitting he’d won which was so never going to happen. She stayed their whole set and left when they packed up to go do her patrols. Just like always. And just like always somehow Eddie found her no matter where she was.

She was in Restfield Cemetery doing a clean up of any newly risen vampires when he sauntered out from behind a mausoleum his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket grinning his stupid adorable grin.

“Hey baby. How’s the day in the office so far?”

Billie rolled her eyes. “Slow and boring. It’s been nothing but fledges so far and not even a lot of them.”

“Well hey, I’m here now. Can’t do much about the lack of villainous lambs to slaughter but I can fix the boredom part.”

Billie rolled her eyes. “Right so I can be annoyed and not get anything done all at the same time.”

“Oh baby, don’t be like that.” He cooed, coming to place his hands on Billie’s hips. She was only a little taller than Eddie in her heels. “C’mon. What can I do to turn my best girl’s frown upside down huh?”

Billie blushed again and looked down, the hand not holding her stake fiddling with his beat up leather jacket. Her heart always skipped a beat when he called her things like “baby” and “best girl” and they both knew it.

“Nothing. I just wanna finish my stupid fucking patrol report back that there’s nothing going on in this shithole town and go bed.”

“Nah not buying it. I think I know what’ll make my babygirl smile again.” His breath was cool against her cheek as he nuzzled her. “How about a private concert huh? We finish up staking my distant relatives or whatever, head back to your place and I play some of your faves. I’ll take requests and everything.”

Fuck, he really had her now. Eddie was always buttering her up but he was really laying it on thick to night. He probably wanted something then and knowing her, she’d probably end up giving it to him if it wasn’t totally insane.

She nodded and Eddie grinned even wider against her cheek before kissing the corner of her mouth sweetly.

“There’s my girl, so sweet for me. Now lemme see how ya tear em apart huh?”

Patrolling with Eddie was always more fun than patrolling alone. They flowed well together in a fight and when there was nothing to do he was a great conversation partner. They always walked together so close their arms would brush as they went. Some nights Eddie would catch her hand and hold it, winking at her every time he did. She let him, because she was a weak bitch who lost her shit over holding hands with her vampire crush who she should be staking. With Eddie there the boring drag of patrol just flew by and they were heading back to her’s for the night in no time.

They still called it her place but Eddie had an invite and somehow over the few years they’d been getting closer all of his things had ended up in her apartment. They slept in the same fucking bed now for fucks sake. Somehow Eddie had weaved himself into her life so completely she couldn’t pull the edges apart anymore. She knew the Council wouldn’t approve if she was still living under their thumb, Hopper barely tolerated it as it was. Sure, she was the Slayer but she was a 20 year old girl too. A girl who wanted a life, and to love and be loved. She was still scared to admit it out loud, afraid if she did he’d vanish like everything else that’d been good her life, but she loved Eddie. She loved him so much. And the things he did and said— it was getting harder to convince herself that he didn’t feel the same. Not when he proved it every day.

So what if he was a vampire. Was it so wrong for her to want this? Was there ever going to be a normal guy who could even understand, let alone keep up, with her? Why should she hold out on the off chance that guy did exist somewhere in the world when she had this loving man right here, now?

Ever the gentleman Eddie opened the door for her, his hand resting on her lower back as he ushered her inside. They both went to the kitchen where Billie pulled out leftovers for her and a blood bag for Eddie while he got a mug out for microwaving his blood. They waited around together for their food to be warmed up, Eddie wrapping her in his arms and swaying them as he hummed. Dinner was always a pretty lazy affair and they scarfed their food down at the counter before unceremoniously dumping their dishes in the sink to be tomorrow’s problem. Finally they both got ready for bed, Billie getting out of her very cute halter and into a soft pink pajama set and Eddie stripped down to his boxers. He laid his warlock down next to her on the bed but before he set it up for their private concert he maneuvered her to the edge of the bed and knelt between her legs.

His hands were cool on her thighs has he rubbed little circles with his thumbs into her skin.

“Baby there’s something I’ve been wanting to ask you for a while now.”

Fear gripped her immediately, the self doubt she still couldn’t shake rearing its ugly head. Did he want to break up? Did he want something she couldn’t give? To do something she couldn’t do? Had this all been a lie to get her so blind and stupid she’d help him do something awful?

Eddie kept rubbing in those little circles, his eyes were warm and gentle. Full of love. She took the leap and went with trusting him.

She licked her lips, her voice only cracked a little. “Yeah Eds?”

“Move to LA with me.”

She stared at him stunned for a long moment, totally thrown for a loop. Never in her life would she have thought this is what he’d want to talk about. Slowly she collected herself.

“But, Eddie I can’t leave the Hellmouth. It’s my job.”

“There’s the new girl here now and she’s been doing great. You’re not chained here and it’s LA, we’re only 2 hours away. If they need us we can be there in no time.”

Jane was doing well, especially with the help of her little gaggle of loser friends and Hopper keeping an eye on her. But she was only 15, she was a kid. How could Billie leave this whole place to a kid? A voice in her head pointed out she’d been about that age when she’d become the Slayer and she’d been basically totally solo through most of her tenure here. Jane had a group of friends to help and a Watcher who took good care of her. She was infinitely better off than Billie had been at that age.

Still she couldn’t just leave.

“I can’t just leave it all on her, it’s my sacred duty or whatever to—“

“Baby,” He broke in, his voice and expression sterner than she’d ever seen. “You’ve already died once. “

Automatically her hand came to the scar on her chest and she rubbed it absently. They only had Jane because Billie had died. There was only ever one Slayer, as like, a semi-reincarnated chosen one thing. One died and the next was called. But Billie had been revived in the hospital so now there were two.

Eddie continued. “I’m not saying you stop slaying. I don’t think you can ever really stop being a Slayer just like I can’t stop being a vampire. But I don’t wanna see an encore of that shit. Ever. Once was enough. I’m not gonna let you get stuck living a small life in a small town because of some ancient prophecy shit anymore just so that prophecy shit can snuff you out before you got a chance to live. You deserve more. Sunnydale was only ever supposed to be a pitstop for the band but I convinced the guys to stay because I loved you the moment I saw you and I wasn’t leaving here without you. The guys are starting to really chafe now, the music scene here is only half decent cause it’s a Hellmouth and 2 hours down to LA for club gigs is getting to be a pain in the ass. They wanna move to where the action is and I think it’s time for all of us— you included— to make the leap. I held off on talking about this until we could make sure that Jane’ll be alright so you could leave with a clean conscience and she’s gonna be as fine as any Slayer can be. Baby, I love you. It’s okay to move on with your life. You’re a grown woman and you deserve to be somewhere with more opportunities for your future. Steve’s already down there and you always talk about how you miss him. Wouldn’t you rather be living closer to your best friend then stuck hanging around with teeny boppers?”

Billie’s eyes were hot with unspent tears. He was right. She missed Steve. He’d been her only friend since she’d blown into Sunnydale and he’d moved down to LA to get work and try to get into culinary school after graduation and his parents losing everything because of tax evasion. She loved Eddie but she still felt lonely without her best friend. And she did want to do more with her life, even if it was just party and be somewhere that couldn’t be easily walked in a few hours again. She missed living in a real city like San Diego. She hated the idea she’d been holding Eddie back but she also couldn’t stop crying because she was so happy he’d stayed. No one ever stayed. But Eddie’d taken one look at her and dropped everything just so he could be with her. God he was too good for her.

Still crying she nodded, trying to smile. God she was glad he’d waited until she’d taken her makeup off.

“Okay Eddie. You’re right, let’s move.”

Eddie beamed and kissed her, wrapping an arm around her waist and helping her to dry her tears with the other.

“Love you baby.”

For once, she felt brave. “ I love you too Eddie.”

If it was possible he beamed even harder and kissed her again soundly before setting up with the warlock bedside her on the bed.

“Okay! We’re celebrating! Any requests from my lady love?”

[wellntruly]

I rank all the movies I've watched from 2021 (40)

It’s that time again!! i.e. sneaking in just before Hollywood’s Biggest Night 🎩 (lol)

Title links go to my original spoiler-free Letterboxd reviews, followed by another link if I also wrote a longer piece (I always note if there will be spoilers in those, if there is no note you’re good!)

No building up this time we’re just starting at the top:

1. The Souvenir: Part II

When I walked out of the theater after seeing this I felt so fucking alive. [Full review]

2. The Power of the Dog

What I want to holler here I can’t holler for spoilers. Love that in a movie!!! Anyway the phrase that has gotten others to watch it: queer western gothic. [Full review]

3. The Green Knight

Sexiest movie of the year a meditation on death, feels good feels right. Revisionist medievalism re-edited over a pandemic to be longer and mistier. Daniel Hart’s score my most-listened-to album of 2021. The cloak is gold. Catch me on a certain day and this might be my #1. [Full review]

4. Drive My Car (ドライブ・マイ・カー)

Tender! [Full review]

5. Bo Burnham: Inside

Film of the year actually though [Full review]

6. Bergman Island

Interestingly given my love for it, I haven’t really recommended this yet to anyone. Watching Mia Wasikowska dance by herself is something that can actually be so personal..?

7. Pig

We’ll get to it if I post my nominations but Alex Wolff best supporting actor. [Full review]

8. Spencer

Sad girl Christmas! We love a daymare. Crafts exquisite, Kristen also exquisite. Weirder even than I hoped. [Full review]

9. The Matrix Resurrections

Haha go Lana, GO Lana! Wild this movie exists. Matrix Winter was such a time. [Full review]

10. Annette

The thing is this is boldest cinematic imagining I saw all year. I saw nothing else like this. Does all of it work? No! Is anyone else doing half of this? Noooooooo. And for good reason! But thank god Leos Carax will! Simon Helberg also best supporting actor. Why was Marion Cotillard eating so many apples… Fuck! Annette! Remember when Baby Annette!!?!

11. Azor

The Martin Eden prize for stylish, little-seen international feature that I keep bugging people about. “Did you guys see Azor though?” “What?”

12. Dune

If you go to my Letterboxd post you’ll see I only gave this movie 3.5 stars, but I already know it’s raising to 4 when I rewatch it, just on the power of vibes. Now that’s desert power. (God it’s so silly though!) (We can admit that a little bit right?) (Denis??) (Denis can’t hear me over his Rice Krispies sand)

13. Passing

First Harold of a very Harold year, babyyyy! Truly though I read the novella after and this was such an assured adaptation.

14. The French Dispatch

Bananas to say this but people are really undervaluing Wes Anderson, one of our greatest directors. Do you know that only one of his films has ever even been nominated for any crafts categories at the Oscars? Meanwhile no one is doing the work quite like him. And the first and third acts and especially interstitial of this are remarkable.

15. Flee (Flugt)

Sometimes the year's wrenching Afghan refugee story also includes a dance sequence to a-ha's 'Take On Me' five minutes in. Something something humanity, basically.

16. The Tragedy of Macbeth

The stars are lights on a velvet sky!! Honestly the fact that I hold this so high (such as higher than the next one!) is really a testament to how far design elements will get you with me.

17. The Worst Person In the World (Verdens verste menneske)

I did like it but! is it weird she doesn’t have a single female friend? Or…any friend? Renate and Anders very good though. Oslo looks like, restful.

18. A Hero (قهرمان)

I saw a picture of this actor later and I didn’t believe it. Performance!

19. Shiva Baby

I have never wanted to watch someone eat a bagel more. I lived vicariously through every bite of that bagel. Why am I so bagel deprived, shit. Is it because I left New York. Anyway Uncut Gems found in the back of the van under all of Joel’s boxes.

20. Parallel Mothers (Madres paralelas)

I just need to impress on you that in this film Penélope Cruz makes a tortilla española. Wow my top twenty is ending very hungry. (And wlw) (Harold look alive!)

And now the also-rans!

Musicals Corner

West Side Story Cyrano Tick, Tick…BOOM!

I gave all three of these 3.5 stars and they all landed back-to-back and that was not intentional but is: kinda funny. Interestingly I don’t think any of these three directors would begrudge me this. They wouldn’t, would they? They’d all be like aw thanks for the good company, I liked what those guys were doing too.

More 3.5's

The Lost Daughter Zola No Time To Die

This is a weird combo and yet, something about it kind of flows. I enjoy a 3.5! 3.5 is on the whole positive.

Some kinda complicated 3's that I nonetheless do keep thinking about at odd moments

The Hand of God (È stata la mano di Dio) Benedetta House of Gucci The Last Duel

Sometimes 3 means: ambivalent. Wow I don’t know! I think all of these are interesting though, I know that. Also those two Ridley Scotts could really go in either order, have swapped several times just while I typed this up.

3's that were perfectly fine and that’s it

CODA I’m Your Man (Ich bin dein Mensch) In the Heights

Sometimes that’s it!

The Belfast Award for Belfast (2.5)

Belfast

Weirdly, I’m very glad I watched it.

And lastly: I’m sorry ❤️

Nightmare Alley F9

There would certainly be others in this category with them, but I simply chose not to, because I'm not sure that sorry would get the heart.

There were also plenty others I just haven’t got around to yet, nothing personal! I will catch you later probably, C’mon C’mon and The Humans and Wheel of Fortune & Fantasy and idk, Old?? Actually I do still kinda wanna watch Old…why do I wanna watch Old..! Stop me from watching Old.

Also, the rest of the docs I watched:

Summer of Soul Procession Listening to Kenny G The Truffle Hunters

All five documentaries I saw were doing such different things and I like that about the medium very much. Animated memoir, historical concert film, experimental/drama therapy, the only way to do a talking-heads style doc, and a sort of natural-world mosaic with kinda no center but beauuutiful cinematography. A very good year for non-fiction! Actually technically The Truffle Hunters might have been a 2020, but I couldn’t figure it out? I mean is Cyrano even a 2021 and not actually a 2022? Emotionally?? WHAT YEAR EVEN IS IT.

It is 2022, definitely, (checks), and I am finally calling it on the films of 2021. Happy Oscars week.

[morlock-holmes]

Ages ago I read a hot take on tumblr that said, in the original D&D context, “good vs. evil” only makes any sense if you interpret them as political factions or parties, particularly in light of how “balance between good and evil” is important because the “good guys” get corrupt when in power and need the evil guys to temporarily take over. I think his comparison was Christian (good?) vs. libertarian (evil?) Republicans.

I'm not very well versed in either Dungeons and Dragons or the Fantasy literature that the game draws from.

There's been nearly 50 years of new editions, settings, supplements and magazine articles laying out the ideas of the game, and of course the assumptions of one edition or setting don't necessarily carry over to the others, and even within a single edition or setting things aren't necessarily that consistent, since you have a bunch of different writers creating material.

Notice that my notes in that post have gotten people saying, "Evil races like you're describing aren't really a major part of D&D lore" as well as, "Evil races like you're describing are one of the most important parts of D&D lore" so, like... Beats me.

I can tell you that in the "Red Box" Basic Dungeons and Dragons set the available alignments are only Lawful, Neutral and Chaotic; I'm told that these come from fantasy stories by Michael Moorcock and the idea of a necessary balance between Law and Chaos is a bit more immediately reasonable than positing that we need to have some evil to make sure all the good doesn't get out of control.

Early editions also featured "Alignment languages" meaning that, say, all intelligent Lawful Evil creatures speak a common language, which was compared in the first AD&D to either church latin or the thieves cant, which is somewhat perplexing but seems to suggest that alignment isn't so much an objective description of your nature as it is, like... A kind of religion?

AD&D is one of the most incomprehensible things I've ever read so I don't really know.

[issela-santina]

thought string: the Joe era of Blue's Clues

NOTE: Just like the Josh string I will be coming back to edit this post from time to time to add to it. I'll more likely be watching episodes at random than going through them in release order.

Donovan really said "get you a guy who can be both Red (who tbh sounds like a grandmother) AND the wolf", huh? Also imagine if he actually wore the red shirt for the former. Come on.

If anything, being overwhelmed by eye contact as an autistic gives me a weird perspective on appreciating this show. Like, in general. I can stop watching it visually and just listen to what's going on and it's enough information, plus the guys' voices sound so nice.

Steve's voice has a resonance that Joe lacks; Joe's voice has a twang that Steve hasn't.

At times Joe's vocal tics almost sound like Goofy. Particularly when he chuckles, it's almost cartoonish.

Joe's hair. I have mixed feelings about it because I like when that fringe doesn't look full and heavy over his already thick eyebrows.

Hair aside, Donovan Patton is BEAUTIFUL. I would fall into the singularity of a black hole for this bastard himbo. Thank you Steve Burns for adopting him and raising my boyfriend standards. Jacqueline is so lucky to have had this guy's babies.

The most perfect casting I'll ever see in my life is seeing Steve and Joe together in the scrapbook trilogy and it almost bleeds into Steve's stories now that they're older.

„Shape Searchers“ was something I got to watch first with Kevin Duala. Better try watching the two versions back to back.

Am I hearing cowbell in that opening theme?

It's just funny to me that the squares to be highlighted when Blue lets Joe find them on his shirt are the ones over his bosom. Maybe I gaze too much.

Custom-shaped notebooks are precious things. Closest thing I've come to access is different shapes of sticky notes.

My younger self would have loved Joe and his hand model (not that I care if hosts actually need one) since he writes left-handed like I do. Having the clues draw themselves kinda robbed me of representation there.

Cargo pants. CARGO PANTS. WITH THE BIG LEG POCKETS. AAAAAAAAAAA

The reason I take the time to know and love this guy is because Steve did. Otherwise Donovan wouldn't have gotten the job. It's infuriating sometimes how some fans are like “I'm too loyal to Steve to watch Joe.” They're brothers. Steve trusts him, why can't you?

How did the kids automatically KNOW that it's Steve calling at the end of his departure episode? Is the the only one calling on that telephone? Does he call on a regular basis? Would be comforting if he canonically does.

There's a privilege to having a three-letter nickname: you get to be the answer to Blue's Clues just by spelling yourself.

Having watched Josh before deciding to run through the Joe episodes has had me seeing that Donovan is a chameleon with energies. The liminal zone between Steve's chill and Josh's jolly. And so seeing him establishing that personality in his time is worth sitting through when the show gets weird around him.

„We Sat On Down“ is an underrated bop. Whether it should show up in Josh's era more isn't in my power.

How many people whined that Shannon Walker Williams played a character named Miranda? Not that different from Donovan not using his own name.

The way Joe's voice freaks out about the mail faithfully matches his expression. Josh also, come the reboot. Steve, on the other hand, made it funny by just about roaring the last word on the audio then looking so casual on video.

Joe's consistent skidoo style is so satisfying to watch as a compilation.

Steve channels Elvis Presley at some of his singing scenes. Joe channels Chubby Checker when he skidoos (cf „The Twist“ and compare the legwork). Pop cultured.

If I hadn't read about Joe being a gothic horror character, „Legend of the Blue Puppy“ wouldn't have felt this sad for me. Someone give this six-foot rainbow shirted marshmallow with pageboy hair a hug.

I have so many questions about Blue's Room but let's start with how Blue ends up there at 3:00 in there no matter what time she jumps in from being in the house?

Polka Dots kissed Blue after she was gifted the capacity for speaking English. I—

Roar E. Saurus is a mood. I too need a little room of my own to practice roaring and end up wailing like there's a meteor about to crash onto this planet.

The visitation rules of Blue's Room would make Barbie and the 12 Dancing Princesses jealous.

“My favorite part was meeting you.” I'M TRYING NOT TO CRY RIGHT NOW.

The absolutely glorious shot of Joe standing back to back an entire head taller than Steve. My neck will break looking at these two.

Steve explaining all the ways he tried to get rid of the giant fourth wall paw print only to be one-upped by a first timer who does it in a fingersnap. I cannot—

[dumblydork]

Colourless

Two posts in one day? And the second way quite so long?? I've outdone myself :D

So everyone, here's some Hinny angst for you! I've never written angst so I know this is not one the best things I've written, but it would mean the world to me if you guys could tell me what I could have done better!

This was an idea I was playing around with sometime, because I wanted some Veritaserum action in a fic, and then Slytherin!Ginny was born :) This is the first time I've written a morally grey character, that too our Gryffindor Ginny. It's quite the contrast haha

Fair warning, there's deceit (think spiked drinks) which goes down in this fic. There's no other specific trigger warnings I can find, but if there's something you guys see, let me know and I'll edit it to show them.

All in all, I hope you're in mood for some angst. If there's anything you want to see written, please do not hesitate from messaging me, and I'll do my best to get it done!

Note- in this one shot, Ginny and Ron are not siblings. Essentially, Ginny is not a Weasley *cue the sacrilege*

-----

Ginny had had enough. The stares from across the room, like molten emeralds shining with loud, unspoken thoughts. The shy touches from when they passed in the hallways together, with their fingers brushing and nerves alighting into a bright golden flame. She had had enough. All this playing around, shying away was now getting to her. Her and Harry had been doing this for the past six months, which led to many almost kisses before he drew away with a slow smirk on his face, sharply contrasted to the apprehension evident in liquid jade eyes. Was she not being obvious enough? She always leant in, always held his stare and bit her lip in the most inviting manner she could think of. All in all, she was sure she was being the most obvious person on the face of the planet, then why did that apprehension not leave those magnificent eyes of his?

She was a 120% sure that Harry James Potter was arse over tit in love with her, and if that made her a narcissist, so be it then. She fully reciprocated these feelings by the way, and was currently sat in the empty common room, stewing over ideas of how to get the confession out.

Her potions textbook remained open in front of her from when she was doing her homework, the page open on the Draught of Living Death. Her incomplete essay lay limply to the side, having been forgotten in favour of more inviting scenarios involving a man with a lopsided grin and jade eyes. She was all alone in the room having stayed up to complete Potions essay due at lunch tomorrow. But given her current state, even a blind man could tell she was definitely NOT doing Potions.

As she let out a long sigh, a heavy wind blew through the open window, chilling Ginny back into reality. She rubbed her arms with her hands, cursing the dying fireplace. A simple Incendio could alight it again, but she was sat facing away from the fire and it would be too much work to get up and light the fireplace. Instead, she settled for tightly wrapping the moss green and silver scarf around her neck, and focusing back on the essay with a shake of her head.

“Draught of Living Death is often used,” She read slowly from where she had left the words incomplete, chewing the top of the quill. She looked into the textbook, but frowned when she realised the wind had blown the pages to another topic. With a sigh, she leant and grabbed the textbook from where it lay on the table, separated from Ginny by 13 inches of parchment. As she heaved the book onto the front, pushing her parchment away, her eyes fell on what Potion was headlined on the page.

“Veritaserum.” She mumbled, a finger on the edge of the page, paused in the motion of flipping it. She blinked once. Twice. And then her frown eased out as a slow grin made it’s way onto her face. She knew what to do.

----

Having gotten the idea was one thing, but actually brewing it was another. It took a complete 28 days to brew, and it was extremely difficult to get right. They hadn’t done this Potion yet since Ginny was still in sixth year, and Veritaserum was taught in theory to NEWT students only. But she had figured a way out as well- the seventh floor broom closet was the perfect place to brew it. It was unused and actually completely forgotten by students and Filch alike. Ginny had stumbled across the room a few days ago and had pushed it’s existence to the back of her mind. But here it was, as if made for this purpose and this purpose only.

So on the day of the new moon, she got started. Acquiring the ingredients was easy enough. Being a star Potions student, she had access to the Slug Club, where old Slughorn was so busy blowing his own trumpet that it was quite easy to weave him into a story about how Ginny needed the ingredients for ‘research’ and academic purposes only. It took a few tries, but right before she got started Ginny had procured all the ingredients. Whilst she was on the quest for ingredients, Ginny had gotten to reading the recipe over and over again, essentially imprinting it onto her neurons. By the time she was bringing the water to a boil inside the grey cauldron, she could recite the steps off by the heart. Yet her eyes remained focused on the book, as she mentally recited the steps. After water came in one vial of Ptolemy followed by stirring anti clockwise. She did it carefully and with so much precision that even Sluggy would be put to shame. By the time the first part of the recipe was finished, Ginny was very satisfied with the product as she poured the incomplete potion into a glass vial for maturation. It was the exact shade of grey as mentioned in the textbook, and Ginny was a happy woman as she went back to the Slytherin dormitory.

The second part of the recipe simply leaving the bottle to rest in a dark place, only bringing it out on the day of the full moon so that it could absorb the moonlight and reach the finished stage. By the time Ginny was done with this step, the potion looked how it was supposed to look as per the textbook. It was colourless and odourless. According to the book, this recipe made a Veritaserum which was potent for an hour and half, which was enough time to finally get the confession and FINALLY start dating him.

After the brewing, the next complex step was administering it to Harry, but that turned out to be the simplest mission of all- she slipped a few drops in as Harry was talking to Ron, and Ginny watched from the Slytherin table across as Harry happily sipped on the pumpkin juice. She had to corner him before anyone asked any questions to Harry and his sudden frankness made them suspicious. She waited for an opening- Harry was left alone for a few minutes in the hallway after breakfast, as Ron and ran up t the dorm to get his lost books, and Hermione went to the washroom in the meantime.

“Hey Harry, could I speak to you for just a second?” Ginny smiled, approaching him. Harry turned around and smiled back. “Of course you can.” He said, and Ginny walked towards a secluded corner, away from other students.

“So what did you want to talk about?” Harry asked.

“First, could you tell me if you possess a Deathly Hallow?”

Oh yes, she knew all about it. Whispers had been going around Slytherin that there was something passed down to Harry which was one of the famed Hallows- only ever found in fables. Harry’s eyes widened as he looked at Ginny. She stared back, wondering if her potion would work or not. This was not the best trial question, but asking about something obvious would be confounding. Pushing away the sudden heaviness in her stomach as she inhaled Harry’s troubled expression, she took an inaudible breath.

“The Invisibility Cloak is with me. It was my father’s.” He spoke with great difficulty, as his handsome features contorted into a frown. It was clear that he was trying to suppress this fact, but looks like the Veritaserum was quite effective. Ginny stepped closer, ignoring the increasing discomfort in her stomach. “And what do you think of me?” She whispered, her mouth close enough to Harry’s. He looked straight into her eyes and without any visible discomfort this time, spoke. “I fancy you. Quite a lot.” As he finished, he let out a breath as if finally released. Ginny frowned- his confession did not uplift her like she thought it would. The space between them stretched and stretched, and despite being only a few inches apart, the realisation in Harry’s eyes put them oceans away. He stepped away, the earlier electrified atmosphere now suddenly limp with tension. Anger, even, Ginny realised.

“You did not slip me Veritaserum, did you?” He said to Ginny, features cool but eyes exhibiting a crescendo of anger.

“I, I,” Ginny stammered, earlier confidence lost towards this cold Harry.

“You what, Ginny?” He said, now his voice slightly wavering.

She looked straight at him, having avoided his eyes all along. She stared into the green depths, pushed the sudden guilt gnawing at her, and spoke, willing her voice too sound as cold as his. Sh was proud when it came out the intended way, shining steel cold, reflecting her house colours. “Yes, yes I did. It was time to get a confession out of you so I did.”

Harry’s eyes widened, before the anger in them was lost, replaced by a hollow look. Somehow, Ginny felt better when he was angry, but this sort of resignation made her feel worse.

Hear yourself, silly girl! You're a Slytherin. She straightened up, willing herself to lose the discomfort weighing her down like rocks.

“And if you’d just asked me, I’d have told you. I would have told you everything I fancied about you. And if you even asked me about the Hallows, I’d have told you that too. I hate deceit and liars, Ginny, and this is nothing less than it. Nor are you any better than those other slimy Slytherins, which I was mistaken about. I hope you’re happy with yourself now.” Harry spoke, his voice a chilling octave. He stormed off and away from Ginny, who suddenly shuddered, falling to her knees in the little alcove.

It was then she let the tears slip, surprising herself with it as well. She inhaled deeply, but the tears wouldn’t stop. Her and Harry seemed irreparable now, no matter what Ginny did. She cried there in the alcove for a few minutes, because she was a heartbroken girl in the end. Except her heartbreak was her own doing- she was responsible for two scarred hearts now. As her tears dried up, Ginny stood back up, rubbed her face and walked away from the alcove, guilt and shame weighing her down, sinking deep in her.

---

And there it is, morally grey Slytherin!Ginny :) I think I like her duality of thinking of spiking drinks and then feeling absolutely like shit when it actually has dire consequences. I might explore more of our beloved characters as morally grey, so let me know if I should or stick to Gryffindor principles :D

Taglist: @amy-herondale-chase // @purplepygmypuffskein // @ginnypxtter // @alwaysmagica1 // @norakelly // @coffee-fandoms-and-chaos //

If you want to be added to my Hinny taglist, please interact with the pinned Taglist post on my account!