#dw next week we get back to the good stuff ;)

[angel-sweets666]

how t some of the bakusquad boys initiate 👀

Bakugo katsuki x reader, eijiro kirishima x reader, Denki kaminari x reader

warnings: mentions of sex, more sexual stuff. No real sex tho Dw reader is mentioned to have a pussy but that’s the one gender mention

sorry I didn’t write sero I don’t have a good idea on his character

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT.

ALL AGED UP TO 18 AND IN 3RD YEAR

Katsuki bakugo

Bakugo either starts off subtly or straight up, no In between. He’s especially rough when he’s had a bad day

you roll over onto your side, typing to Mina about drama from class 3B (1B)When bakugo bursts open the door and slams it closed, practically making the door frame shake. “Had a bad day?” You asked him, still distracted on your phone and tapping away. Bakugo lets out a groan “I FUCKING-“ “inside voice.” You interrupted “I had a fucking ass day.” He still yelled as he threw his hero shirt and mask onto the floor, stomping over to you in bed. You peered over your shoulder and looked him up and down, noticing how dirty his boots are “bakugo take your boots off! Your filthy!!” You sat up and looked him up and down again. the blonde rolls his eyes and takes off his black and orange dirt stained boots, chucking them to the door. “There, better?” He grumbled, climbing into bed with you. “Yeah.. that’s better” you said as you rolled onto your back, bakugo sat up and pulled your legs apart and laying down on your chest. You could feel his length begin to grow harder and harder underneath you, he sat up and slowly began to rock his hips against yours. “shit- can we fuck?”

eijiro kirishima

sweet boy asks, and he’s so polite about it too! He wants to be a chivalrous hero and a great boyfriend in general to you. So of course he asks so politely:(((

you were washing some dishes in the common room, you and tsu had some noodles for lunch and you were just cleaning up the bowls from the food. Humming and dancing to yourself, kirishima watched from afar. You looked so pretty when you were happy like that, how could he not wanna fuck you? As you put away the last fork you suddenly felt a pair of very strong and solid arms wrap around you “hi baby!” You giggle and kiss his cheek, kirishima gives you a toothy grin and kisses your neck gently “hey sweetheart.. you look so pretty today” he tells you as he rubs your size “you wouldn’t possibly be in the mood would you?” He asks with his cheeks turning red “are you asking for sex?” You grinned to him and he nodded “yeah alright baby cmon”

Denki kaminari

My bro begs, like HE BEGS And not in a cute little submissive way I’m talking like really annoying “PLEASEEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE” while on his knees shuffling around to follow you

You were busy trying to clean out your dorm, preparing for graduation in the next few weeks. The task was already challenging, but it became nearly impossible with an electric blonde following you around on his knees, begging for you to let him fuck you

“PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE, ILL BE QUICK!”

You rolled your eyes, trying to ignore him as you sorted through a pile of textbooks. "Denki, I really need to get this done. Graduation is right around the corner, and I can't leave my dorm looking like a disaster zone." He shuffled closer, still on his knees, and clasped his hands together dramatically. "But I need you more than your dorm does!” You turned to look at him, raising an eyebrow “oh really?” You leaned your weight to one hip, Denki rolled his eyes then stood up, mild carpet burn on his knees from following you around “BRO YES? YOUVE GOT LIKE, A 10/10 PU-” “ DONT DAY THAT SO LOUD!” You covered his mouth then sighed “you know what… I could use the break” denkis face lit up “so… I can fuck you?” He asked with his face practically glowing as you nodded

I said I’d tag u next time I wrote for Denki kaminari so here! I hope it was as accurate as last time @b0o0o

[some-of-us-watch-the-sunset-too]

hii I don’t know if I’m supposed to give ya a prompt like said. But I’ve been feeling angstyyyy sooo if you can no bother my love, could ya do : all of the outsider boys reacting to you (s/o) death?

A/N: Hi anon! the post for the prompts thing is here but i’m taking requests too so dw! I’m feelin the angst rn so this was perfectly timed!

The boys if their S/O d!ed

———————————————————

⚠️ TW for death, implied suicidal thoughts ⚠️

Darry

He would go on living for the most part, not because he doesn’t care about the fact that you’re gone, but he just can’t afford to shut down. if he does, he risks losing Soda and Pony too.

He’d bring flowers to your grave once a week, on Wednesdays (don’t ask why i just decided this). Your favourite flowers. When the first bunch he put down dies, he gets someone he knows, (maybe Ponyboy, i feel like he’d dig arts and crafts) to either press the flowers or dry them so he always has them, even if they bring back painful memories.

To add to the whole getting flowers thing, he’d always take one out of each bunch, just like he did before your death to make sure that he replaces them as soon as they wilt.

He most likely got the call about your passing and had to tell the guys. He tried to stay calm while telling them but he broke down before he could finish.

Ponyboy

This hurts just to think about! He, unlike Darry would shut down completely. He’d be failing class, wouldn’t get out of bed and would hardly eat. If we count it as after Johnny and Dally die, that would be 3 people he cared about that died (other than his parents)

If you two watched the sunset together often i feel like he’d never watch it again. it would be too painful for him.

Whenever he gets into an argument with Darry he runs out of the house and straight to your grave. He’d sit there and vent to you and eventually fall asleep there. the guys probably put a bench by your grave so he’d sleep there.

I think that after he was functional again, he’d get very cold and bitter, kinda like Dally. He’d get into fights all the time and would start acting out. He just doesn’t know how to cope with you gone..

Sodapop

Sodapop would go to your grave everyday after work and just talk to you about his day. he would fill you in on everything going on with the guys, any rumbles or fights with socs, stuff like that.

I honestly think that if Soda was serious about your relationship he would have given you a promise ring. I think that even after you were gone he would keep wearing it and maybe even put yours on a chain and wear that under his t-shirt, right next to his heart.

If it was a violent death? He would completely stop fighting, he would only see it as a constant reminder of what happened to you, he would realise that it really didn’t do any good.

He wouldn’t fully shut down but i think he would stop hanging out with the guys so much and would get very quiet. He wouldn’t be his laughing, wild self anymore. He knows that isn’t what you would’ve wanted but how could he keep on joking when you were gone? how could he ignore it?

Dally

Dally would go on hating and fighting more than he ever did. The world took so much from him and now it took you too? Why should he care about anyone or anything if you weren’t there anymore.

He’d spend a lot of time at your grave. No talking, he’d just sit there and smoke a cigarette. Sometimes he’d silently cry, but he hates crying out in the open.

Dally would blame himself. It doesn’t matter how you passed away, he would look at every detail of the days leading up to your death and see if there was any moment where he could’ve done something to stop it. if it was a violent death, could he have stopped you from getting into that situation in the first place? if it was an accident, could he have stopped it from happening, could he have made it so that it was him instead?

Steve

Steve would be kind of like Dally. He’d hate and fight more than ever. How could the world be so cruel that he’d take you from him?

I feel like it could be his first proper experience with loss, which is different to the others that i’ve written about so far. He really wouldn’t know how to cope. he’d try to go on living, then he would shut down for a while, then he would probably just have to get out of town for a while.

I honestly think he’d do something drastic. Rob a gas station or snap and start a fight with his dad or something. He would get very reckless too. where he would be careful when competing in drag races, now he would speed up if anything.

He is so afraid of forgetting your face. He keeps a picture of you in his jacket pocket to make sure he doesn’t forget but he realises he’s starting to forget the smaller things like how you’d make this particular face when you’re being sarcastic, and how your face would light up when someone mentioned your favourite things.

Two-Bit

Two would start drinking even more, you were lucky to see him sober. He’d stop hanging out with the guys.

He would be angry for a while. Angry that you left him here alone. Of course he knows deep down that it’s not your fault but he can’t help it. Two probably went to your grave one day, drunker than ever. He started giving out that you left him and ended up throwing his bottle of beer at your headstone. That snapped him out of it. He picked everything up and cleaned the headstone best he could.

After the angry phase is gone he would start to write you letters filling you in on everything. He couldn’t bring himself to go to your gave so he just pretended you had moved far away. He puts them in a big box under his bed. He considered burning them, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it

He sometimes forgets you’re not there though. Say if he’s doing something he might yell “Y/N could you pass me the ___” then remember you’re not there and just sits down and cries, even a few years after.

Johnny

Johnny really can’t deal with it. With his parents being so bad and you being his main support, he couldn’t take it anymore.

I honestly think that he would run away, let everyone forget him. Sometimes he would consider the ways to see you again, but luckily someone always snaps him out of it.

He hangs out with the guys more than ever, it keeps him from shutting down completely. they become his main support, but he’s even more quiet, he sits a little outside of the group when in the curtis’ house.

After a few months of grieving he remembers a list you guys wrote about all your hopes and dreams. So he decides that he’s going to complete everything on it. He lives for the two of you.

[hypegirl1]

In my dreams(Rodrick Heffley X Fem!reader)

AN:WASSUP Y´ALL?I had no inspiration to write these last months,I´m sorry,but I finally got it back lmfao I basically had a breakdown while listening to In my Dreams by RV and ended up having inspiration,damn...(This is proof read so dw,also I have no idea why tf this is so long) Summary:You´ve been in town for a few weeks since you moved,however,Rodrick doesn´t notice until one day,when he sees you on the school hallway Word count:1786 Warnings:Language(Ig?) Genre:Fluff(Ig)

"Nah dude,last week was amazing,what do you mean?"

"I know dude,but like,what about the girls?We don´t get bitches"

That´s the conversation Rodrick was having with his friends at the school´s entrance,the infamous Rodrick Heffley.It hasn´t even been a month since you arrived and you already knew pretty much everything about him:he had 2 little brothers,was the drummer of a band he made,was never that smart and he loved messing around with people,well,pretty much an average teenager,right? He lived in front of your house,and you always saw him at school(when he went),never talked at all,not even a "hi,who are you?never saw you around". It looked like he never realized you were there,but at the end,you didn´t cared,until now.

"Bro,I´m telling you,when we become famous,we will get A LOOOT of bitches"

"Yeaah"

That´s the last thing they said before Rodrick bumped into someone for not looking.

"Hey!Watch your-step"

"Sorry,I was rushing and didn´t saw you,are you okay?"

That´s when Rodrick realized that the girl that bumped into him,was one that he never saw around before,was he dreaming?

"Yeah yeah,sorry,I was in the way"

Damn,is it hot in here?

"I´m glad,I have to go,see you around Rodrick!"

"Bye..."

Rodrick was just standing there like a lamp post,what just happened?

"Dude,you good?"

"Yeah yeah,it´s just...who´s that girl?I never saw her around"

"Y/N?She moved into your neighbourhood a few weeks ago,you didn´t realized?"

"What?She´s been living next to my house and I didn´t realized?"

"Dude chill,just say hi to her"

"As if it was that easy..."

The bell rang,that meant that the day was over,everyone started filling the hallways,Rodrick got in his van and headed home as quickly as possible,they were right,the house in front of the Heffley´s now belonged to your family,how come he didn´t realized?

"Uhh mum,who are our neigbhors?"

"You mean the Y/L/N´s?"(your last name)

"Yeah,them"

"Oh,they have 2 daughters I think,Y/N and Kelsey are their names,If I´m not wrong Y/N is your same age and Kelsey is about Greg´s age,why the question?"

"Just asking"

Damn,your house was literally in front of Rodrick´s,how come he didn´t realized?is it because he nevers pay attention to the stuff that he doesn´t care about?Oh but he did cared now,what should he do?Go over to your house to just say hi?Invite you to have dinner with his family?No way,you had been in town for a few weeks now,and it was too soon to get you to meet his disaster family...He had been thinking in his room about what to do for the last 10 minutes,until he realized that he left his bedroom door open,and saw that Greg was there spying on him.

"What the fuck do you think you´re doing here?!"

Greg panicked and started running towards his room,but Rodrick had already started to chase him,he was lucky that he locked his door just in time.

"Where you spying me?!"

"Maybe-I mean no!"

"You better open this door if you want to live Greggy"

"I saw you earlier talking with mom about the new neighbours and got curious that´s it!"

Wait,hold on,maybe Greg new something that he didn´t?

"Do you know them?"

"Yes,Kelsey is in the same class as me,she´s nice,I could say she´s my friend now"

"And do you know something about her sister?"

"Why should I tell you that?"

"Greg I swear to god that if you don´t tell me I´m breaking down your door"

"Okay okay!But don´t do that please.I always see her sister after school,she picks Kelsey up because her parents don´t get home til night,as far as I know,she´s super nice,she always offers to take us and Rowley home"

"And?"

"That´s all I know!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes! I promise!"

"Fine,tomorrow I´ll go pick you up and your other guy friend from school"

"What?no way,I´ll preffer to go by feet"

"I said that you´re coming with me"

Greg knew that his older brother had something going on in his mind,but it probably was worse if he said a word.Good,he had some basic info about you,but what else?The plan was that tomorrow,he would show up to pick up his little loved brother,he had to give you good vibes and not the type of guy that is 24/7 bickering with his brother,wait,maybe it was too late?I mean,you already knew a lot about him,how would you react if you suddenlt saw him as a perfect man instead of the angsty boy he is?Meh,It doesn´t matter,people change all the time.Of course,he could talk to you at school,but you weren´t in the same class as him,and let´s say that he wasn´t that brave enough to talk to you at school.

The rest of the day went by as usual,except for the fact that Rodrick looked super distracted in today´s rehearsal for Löded Diper,he was barely able to start the song,his friends were worried,this wasn´t usual in him,and all just because he couldn´t get your pretty image off of his head,your figure,your hair,your eyes,your lips,he remembered everything as if it depended on his life.

But it just got worse when he saw you there,you where at the entrance of your school,sitting on the stairs,writing on your notebook,you looked so dreamy,the day was sunny and clear as glass,your hair flowing with the little wind that was coming,the way your top and shorts hugged your figure,so unbothered by the rest of the people around you,on your own little world,you looked so unreal...

You felt that someone was watching you,and as you turned back you saw him.

"Rod!What are you doing there?Come sit with me!"

You gave him what was probably the sweetest smile he ever saw,he could melt any moment.

"What?Oh sorry"

He sat next to you,he was nervous,why were you being so nice to him?

"Are you okay?You look nervous,is something bothering you?"

"No no it´s just that...you´re so pretty Y/N,I could stare at you for hours and not get bored"

"Aww you´re so sweet,since when are you so romantic?You didn´t told me those things when we started dating,I love this side of yours"

Wait,dating?No way,since when does the school loser date a pretty girl like you?Did he had amnesia or something?

"Wait,dating?"

"What?Rod are you okay?Yes,for a month now,are you sure you´re fine?"

He couldn´t believe your words,this was so unreal,when did this happened?

"I swear I´m fine,it´s just that- sometimes it´s unbelievable for me to know that I have the most perfect girl in my life"

Now he had no idea what he was talking about or since when he speaks like this,this situation was kinda weird,but it all changed when he heard someone from a distance calling his name.

"Rodrick?Rodrick,come on,Rodrick!"

Suddenly he was at his room,and that´s when reality hit him,he was just dreaming about you...

"Rodrick you´re gonna be late for school come on,get up"

His dad left the room,leaving a sad yet happy Rodrick,he was happy in that dream,but after waking up,damn,he missed that...

This was probably the first time ever that Rodrick got dressed in a nice way only to go to school,he tried really hard,he had to give you a good impression about him,but let´s say that his parents and his younger brother Greg were kinda concerned when they saw him like that...

At school,he only saw you at the time between classes,but you did say hi to him everytime you saw him at the hallways,he was too stunned to say hi back,damn...

And as the day ended,you got on your car on the way to your sister´s school to pick her up as usual,when you got there,she was talking with her friends.

You parked and got off the car and walked to Kelsey,she was laughing with her friends.

"Kelsey,come on let´s go home,give me your backpack"

"Y/N!"

She hugged you as strong as she could,since she was born she always saw you as her idol,she thought you were perfect,even though you didn´t saw yourself like that,you wished that puberty didn´t made your little sister hate you,but as things looked like,that wasn´t going to happen.

"Do you guys need me to take you home?It´s kinda hot today"

"No need Y/N,but thanks,my brother will pick us up"

"Are you sure?If you guys don´t want to wait here I could take you home real quick"

"No need thanks,here he comes"

And he did,as Greg finished talking,a white van parked next to the school,black letters on one side that said "Löded Diper",Rodrick´s van

"Greggy!My dear brother,how are you doing?"

Rodrick petted Greg´s head,leaving him with his hair like a bird´s nest

"I´m-fine I guess"

"It´s the first time I see you pick up your little brother from school"

"Y/N?What a surprise!"

You could tell that something was off,he seemed nervous,uncomfortable.

"Hey!I wasn´t expecting to see you here,you know Greg always walks home"

"Oh well It´s because-I´m always in a rush you know?"

"Yeah,next time,don´t be scared to say hi to me in the hallways,I don´t bite you know?"

Oh god,you realized that he never said hi back,of course you realized,you´re not dumb,what has he thinking?

"Uhm,Greg you can get in the car,I´m going to talk with Y/N for a moment"

"Okay?-"

"You go Kelsey,I´ll be there now,so,what did you wanted to tell me?"

"Uhm well,you have been in town for a few weeks now,and I never introduced myself properly"

"Neither I did,don´t worry,I should have introduced me first before saying hi to you without you knowing who I am"

"Oh,fine then haha"

"Should we start over?I´m Y/N,your neighbor,I like shopping and going outside,how about you?"

"I´m Rodrick,your new neighbor"

Suddenly,there was a very awkward silence,usually you knew how to get out of these,but there was something that didn´t let you speak or say something.

"Uhm...yeah that´s it"

"Yeah!cool cool..."

Silence...just silence...oh god why was this happening?

"Well...I have to leave,I gotta take Kelsey home,see you tomorrow!"

"Sure!"

You started walking towards your car,and before opening the door you heard Rodrick´s voice calling as he ran towards you.

"Y/N wait!"

"Yeah?"

"I...gotta tell you something else"

"Well tell me"

"I-i like you"

"Wha-what?"

"Don´t take this weird!But,I didn´t knew who you were til yesterday when we bumped into each other,it was love at first sight,I´m not looking for an answer or something,you can act as if this never happened,but I just want to tell you that in my dreams,you loved me back"

That was...weird?no,it was romantic,no,weird,so many emotions started to cross your mind,he dreamed about having you?

"Rodrick I-"

"No,I´ll just leave"

He started to walk away,leaving a confused you behind him.You knew why you said hi to him at school,you wanted to know him better,there was a spark in him that you never saw before.

"Rodrick wait!"

He turned around,looking at you.

"I didn´t answered.Meet me today at 4pm at the park,maybe...we can get your dream to come true"

[oodlyenough]

dw empire of death

spoilers ofc

hm. like many RTD finales, a bit of a mixed bag. i feel less certain of my overall thoughts than last week (which i thought was a blast, tbh).

the good: i'm... pretty happy with the ruby mom reveal. this whole mystery box set up turning out to be "she was just a scared young woman who couldn't raise her baby", an ordinary woman mythologized by ruby and the doctor over the season, etc, is an extremely RTD solution. and as a fan of his stuff I liked seeing that... well... pivot to his roots as opposed to her being part of the pantheon or something (which I admit I did wonder about myself).

the *idea* of her pointing at the sign to name the baby is nice, I like the meaning of it and what Ruby takes from it, but it is a bit of a clumsy set up. very dramatic pointing, ms miller.

also as much as i was dying to see what the screen said lol i DID love the character moment of ruby stepping forward to offer the name to sutekh, only to smash it, and then clip his collar (lmfao btw). i thought that was a nice character moment for ruby. in that moment i thought perhaps we'd never find out the answer, and that would be something ruby sacrificed for the greater good. i wasn't sure how satisfying that would be and I guess I'll never have to find out bc it's not what happened lmao, but it is where i thought we might be headed.

i liked seeing the gloves and the rope from TCORR come back. i like surprise tools that will help us later :)

loved the memory tardis from the time window and the use of that tales from the tardis set. how cool.

loved the time window playing clips of classic who that's so fun. mel's moment with six's outfit awwww. and i'm sure i missed some of the namedrops of planets etc that fifteen was going on about but i liked the ones i caught. shan-shen! oodsphere!!

i thought the effects of the dust wave and the insta-crumbling was pretty good and spooky

i really like having mel around! i hope we get to see her cameo again

the mixed bag:

'the death wave is eating memories and going back through family trees in reverse' is pretty cool as a concept, i thought. where i think this hurts the resolution a bit is that in the moment i thought, "ok, well, ruby's "safe" because there's the Mystery, there's no family tree for it to climb!" but like... there was. does sutekh need to personally be aware of your family tree to kill you?

i really liked the moment of fifteen and ruby watching louise outside the coffee shop, and i really liked the moment where ruby sits down across from her and then the barista calls the name ruby and they have this look. i ... kind of found myself wishing that it would stop there? i mean, i'm happy for ruby, and i think "ruby found her bio fam and now ruby and her big family are together" is a nice ending for the character. but there was something so emotional and bittersweet about that split second of wondering and connection between the two, and ruby having that choice to make...

the goodbye between ruby and fifteen was lovely. millie gibson is so good her big watery eyes make me so sad. i've enjoyed the two of them together and i think they have incredible chemistry as characters and actors, like, what a team of besties. i'll miss ruby on the TARDIS. but ... only 10 episodes, a couple of which didn't feature them much at all... a bond that didn't get super developed on screen ... I dunno. Left me wishing we got more from them through the season.

I do know we'll see more of Ruby next season, so I'm excited for that. an s4 Martha situation. but then I also worry about Varada Sethu's character getting development time too...

the not so good:

killing off rose, kate, etc in the first minute removes stakes, because while you might worry about characters like cherry or carla who won't necessarily stick around when ruby leaves or whose deaths will impact ruby, you know rose and kate are not going to stay dead permanently. also very infinity war (derogatory) where there was the same issue -- no these characters won't stay dead and i'm not going to humour it lol

rose temple sweetie it was nice to see you stand in the background and not speak. what was that about. she FINALLY got all of two lines. it just felt like she didn't serve a lot of purpose in this ep. I mean I liked seeing her but she did not do anything to the story in either part of the ep

the solution of "death kills death" was a bit goofy lol but it's doctor who the solution is always goofy. i didn't care too much about that i guess. but it was goofy

i really think we could've used a more decisive scene with carla and ruby. carla seems to understand ruby's desire to know her bio fam and be supportive of it and that's lovely. obviously ruby loves carla and vice versa. but i think it would've been nice to have a moment of on-screen explicit acknowledgment between carla and ruby that there might be weird feelings there, that louise isn't replacing carla, something like that.

related to the above, the Doctor says Ruby redefined the way he thinks of family, which is a huge thing to say, but I don't feel like I ever saw that happening on screen. it COULD have. all the pieces are there with foundlings and foster care and adoption...

[yume-x-hanabi]

Life update

Posted on DW, but I figured I could update this blog as well now that I'm semi-getting back into social media...

I've sorta fallen off from the fandom and social media space, because life has been a lot these past few years. To sum up briefly:

- I made a couple of posts about it last year, but I bought an apartment in a new building (construction wasn't finished at the time). Running left and right to choose stuff such as flooring etc, getting things organized on the paperwork side (banks, notaries...), plus the move itself, took me a lot of time and energy. I've been living here full time for 10 months now though, and it's been great. Love the building (even tho it's not entirely finished orz), love the neighbourhood, and it's so great to have your own place. Missy seems at ease here, too, which is important. The balconies' guardrails are huge glass panes that go all the way to the floor with no gap, so that means I can let her out without supervision without fear of her falling/jumping off.

- Work, the main culprit for my withdrawal from fandom. I think I mentioned before that I took on more admin tasks a couple years ago, and while I enjoy the actual work when I get to it, it's a huge huge drain to my mental energy, esp when combined with everything else (class prep, exams, meetings etc). So it's pretty much killed my drive, and my already bad work-life balance just became worse and worse. Like, it's not that I don't have free time (perks of teaching = lots of holidays), but when I do I'm so mentally exhausted that I was pretty much only able to play mindless games like Solitaire or Civilization VI (which became like an addiction lol) or doomscroll on twitter or reddit. I pretty much lost my ability to engage with hobbies, except for the ones below, and I'm trying really really hard to come back and make it stick this time around.

- Speaking of hobbies though, I've gotten really into classical music and started attending concerts regularly. By perfect coincidence, my new place is at a 2-minute walk from my city's philharmonic hall, and I've been enjoying the heck out of that perk. My city's orchestra is really good, and their program so varied. When it was time to choose my subscription for next season, it was harder to choose which concerts not to attend (but a choice had to be made ;v;). Also I'm super stoked because they're playing my favorite symphony next year, I didn't expect to be able to hear it live so soon!

I think this really saved my mental health this year. Like, it's a bit hard to explain, but there's something really unique and relaxing about the atmosphere there. It's a bit intimidating at first, and I was really self-conscious about not making noise at the beginning, but I've gotten used to it now. Mostly, I think it helped me rediscover what it is to just sit down and enjoy the moment, without constantly looking for stimulation to my already overstimulated mind (silly aside, but before that I'd sorta lost the ability to binge a series without mindlessly checking my phone in the middle of episodes. Being "forced" to keep my phone away for the duration of a concert has really helped me recover my attention span). I think it helps my mind rest, if that makes sense? Also there's nothing comparable to listening to the music live in a hall with great acoustics x3

I followed the Queen Elisabeth Competition closely this year, live for a few finals performances when possible, the rest on TV, and it was really awesome. I think in four years I'll get the subscription for the whole finals week :p

- Relatedly, I've also started taking violin lessons. I'd always wanted to learn an instrument since I was a child (loved those mandatory recorder classes we had at school lol), but it never happened (partly because I was too passive as a child to actively ask for it, partly because my parents probably didn't want to have their eardrums massacred, so didn't offer it (wouldn't have said no if I'd asked, but as I said I wasn't good at asking back then)). It took me a while to actually make the jump, because I thought I'm too old now and there's no point, but I finally did with some encouragements from friends and colleagues and I'm really glad I did. Violin is... hard lol. I sound absolutely terrible. But it's also really fun? Like I feel like I'll never be good, but also I've made so much progress since I started. I don't have much time to practice (I aim at at least 10min a day these days, which isn't a lot, but it's better than nothing and it's more important to do it a little regularly than a lot once in a while). I'm really looking forward to the day I'll be able to attempt to play Xillia songs 😄 Also I really love my teacher<3

- Lastly, niece is 3 now and so fun to interact with. It's not always easy, she's very stubborn and willful, but she's also really sweet and funny. Love her ❤️ And she's just got a little sister! who's a very chill newborn, so different from niece#1 lol. I can't wait to see them play together when they're a little bit older.

Anyway, that's pretty much the main things that have been going on the past couple of years. Like I said I'm not sure I can be totally back, I think it's gonna take a lot of adjustment, but this time I really don't want to let another year pass by like that. I'm really gonna try hard to have better balance this time!

[kadextra]

I’ve wanted to properly say my personal opinion on this in an actual post for a while, now’s a good time as any

I realized a few weeks ago that I do not feel capable of adding to the admingate conversation, especially in regards to abusive workplace treatment involving the unions & how various international laws play a role. It’s way out of my league.

like I admit with my full chest I came here to watch cubes and don’t know about all these complex topics, and I have no time I can give to researching all of them. that’s why I’ve personally taken a rather distanced stance. this is complex and emotionally heavy stuff that needs careful attention, I’m not able to speak about it well within my experience/knowledge as I’d like, so I don’t feel comfortable or that it’s my place in doing so

I do take a pretty wide outlook on the situation with the time and energy I can allocate to it. the things I’ve heard from admins involved say it’s not looking any better, while others in the project say it’s being improved in a good direction. It’s different opinions on every side- and that’s pretty usual for a situation like this with lots of people and moving parts. in the end we as the onlooker fans can’t know anything except what we’re shown.

In the same way, I think you guys are valid to your own opinions and interpretations, whether it be negative or optimistic, neutral or what be you. I am aware of how you all feel, and like. it’s your own blogs post however you want

The approach I’ve found myself taking here is “support the admins. hold tentative hope for the project to be handled in a proper manner.” thus I continue to primarily send my appreciation and gratitude to admins who have suffered greatly & unfairly, who have worked hard, and I continue watching how the server is being handled with the hope it can be improved in better conditions.

I think a day where the QSMP permanently shuts down burns dies in a fire and explodes + everyone I enjoy on it leaves would be the day I release my final hope for it and leave too. but I don’t think I’d leave qsmpblr forever, you’re all too awesome :3

I truly want to see it get better. In no other place would I get to watch people on opposite sides of the globe like YD and BBH who don’t know each others native language at all meet and become best friends. those two have given me joy recently :’)

so I will keep a close eye observing, waiting to see how it develops the coming months/year

Lastly, I’ll make something clear.

As I touched on earlier, chances are I’ve heard all about something even if I don’t post on it. If anyone expects replies from me talking about the workplace abuse, management privilege, international unions & laws, again I reiterate- I know I cannot give an educated reply on that and would end up poorly regurgitating all the same stuff we’ve already heard hundreds of times the past month which isn’t me helping anything. I truly wish I could somehow make things better for myself and everyone by doing that, but I can’t. and it won’t.

so like if you’ve sent asks, thank you. and I know. but topics like this in my inbox likely won’t get a response. dw it’s not on you guys ❤️

I hope any members of our community who may read this are doing well. I know it’s difficult to be in this odd, frustrating limbo situation and have a lot of complicated mixed feelings about whats going on with this media that means a lot to you. You felt what the beautiful highs of the QSMP are like, and now you’ve become aware of the lowest lows. I get it, it’s been hard

if you want to stick around with your streamer and see what happens next then sure you do that. if you need to take a step back, disengage from the content for a while or just leave entirely then sure you do that.

do whatever is right by you, take care of yourselves okay? hugs 🫂❤️

[spicyraeman]

Well interacting with you makes my week too! **aggressive friendly fist bump**

I hope your holidays are going well 😁

Wolfheart is ending me. Can I pet that dawg? CAN I PET THAT DAWG? (https://vt.tiktok.com/ZGeN9U7kG/)

I love seeing the hairy SH art! PCOS / trans / wolf girlie, I stan all versions I see. We're not cowards here! The new band drawings are fire, still making my heartrate go jglcbxlw. And seeing the growth? Honestly it's magic to me, I think it's perfect then it becomes even more perfect and I'm just how?? How possible?

Veteran'zel, Baby'zel, Beam'zel, Horny'zel, Rat'zel, all I do is love'zel! The cheetah/dog doodle + wet rat'zel made me hiccup from laughter, we were blessed.

Buddy, Karlach's got her tail docked like the gith children, that's why! See, problem fixed **insert Flex Tape meme**

Also for Lae'zel's accent : yes, she would have such a harsh accent! As a foreign speaker, the pronunciation isn't always intuitive and is sometimes paradoxal. She probably never used some sounds, and it's hard to guess a lot of them. It's so inconsistent. I lack air in the middle of my sentences because of the tonal accentuations differences. Languages are crazy man. Lae'zel would have a stroke, struggling to say "library" with Gale correcting her.

I've been upgraded to bestie? Careful, I feel like the most specialest goblin in town now 😎

I also wanted to share with you my recent victory : I passed my exams with unexpectedly high grades! It's been 10 years since I succeeded in anything school related, I feel strangely proud and hopeful. I attribute this partly to the intense hyperfixation for BG3. I can come back to this fandom and get comfort when I feel burned out and in need of motivation. Thank you for being part of it and sharing your blorbos with us. Good soup for our cold starving souls. So yeah, you and your art matter even if you find it bleh sometimes and you doubt yourself.

I wanted to be brief but I'm incapable of shortening shit even if my life depended on it. Violently dumping my brain in your ask like I'm late on garbage collecting day. Sorry not sorry for the awkward emotional stuff. Take care of yourself, bestie ✌️

🫀🚑

Sry for answering these “backwards”, I just needed to get the conlang stuff out first before all my good braincells shut down lol

hope the holidays are going well on your end as well :]

To pet a werewolf truly is the dream isn’t it, wereshart is prob my fav hc for her it just fits so well. I've been trying really hard lately to figure out how to draw her recently bc despite the art disparity her and lae’zel are neck in neck at being my fav characters. Seeing the growth in the bass drawing really gave me that boost of confidence that I'm at least slightly getting there lol

I truly do love Lae’zel in every form, but wet rat’zel rotates in my mind more than it should, sadly its not a hc I could ever commit to considering I can’t even remember Karlach’s canon tail lmaoo I really should just hc that karlach got her tail docked at this point, that or I need to make a checklist for her so I can go through and make sure ive got all her bits when I draw her

Also Ive already posted my big rambling mess about Gith accents but yeah harsh accent lae'zel best lae'zel, it just makes sense

But yoooo big gratz on the exams! Def something to be proud of!! I can agree this fandom really is a huge motivator, I haven’t had this much drive to do anything I've been doing recently in years. Glad I could help provide a lil comfort spot full of blorbo soup for the soul lol

Dw about shortening shit as you’ve prob seen i’m prone to rambling and also every emotion I experience is awkward so that's just par for the course here.

Hope life treats you well till the next ask, peace ✌️

[daniclaytcn]

re your complaints/critiques on 911 said in an anon response:

I 100% agree!! On the finale, I love everything about the first 30 minutes! the bridge collapse is everything, i could go on about that for hours, even the birth on the couch, i thought that was a funny twist in the couch theory. I love everyone else's storylines (bathena honeymoon, henren's newest foster daughter, madney wedding planning) I could like eddie with marisol if it ends with him growing and them not together, but buck's ending was so infuriating! like you said it felt like he was going in circles which can be true to real life, doesn't always make for good television. The biggest thing im worried about it it being nearly exactly like bucktaylor, especially if they last a season. I don't care if its a slowburn but like you said, theres slowburn and setting up something with no payoff over and over

anyways, Im surprised they didn't circle back to jo and mallory (molly maybe?). they usually circle back to the injuries of the week to get the like conclusion so (and i didn't realize until after) to not circle back to them felt weird. Do you think we'll get them in the next season?

OH also i thought it was so interesting that we almost / could've gotten the lees for this ep! tbh i thought it would be a scene where chim is in the hospital with maddie (if this wouldn't be a scene were maddie and chim jump the gun andd marry) and they reaffirm that chim is a psuedo son to them this leads to my other question: did you think we would've gotten a madney wedding like in the S2 finale for Bathena and would you have wanted that?

anyways, I thought this ep did the platonic relationships really well (buck and hen, buck and chim, hen and chim, and buck and bobby) and did literally every other storyline well except for buck's ending

i realize like as i finished that this was kinda neg so if you don't want to respond to any of this dw I understand adsf

i enjoyed everything related to the emergency! i thought it was done very well, while i wanted it to be more high-stakes i get why they couldn't end what they thought might be their last episode on a cliffhanger or something. the 'pay it forward' thing really worked so well, not just with the civilians and jeff but i also clocked it with ravi and buck (someone also pointed out that the 118's degree of injuries was based on how much experience they've had on the job, which is why ravi didn't face any danger at all, and i thought that was an interesting theme!). i enjoyed how they wrapped up the other characters and i love that bathena got their cruise.

my major problem is the way buck's storyline was resolved, while the sperm donor thing was wrapped up very well; i'm unhappy and tired of him going in circles with natalia yet again. i also dislike the implication that him ending the season being single would mean it's an 'unhappy' ending for him—aside from all the obvious issues with that statement, buck literally started out this season by trying to be comfortable in being single and figuring out life by himself. it would have been the PERFECT conclusion to his arc. i love buck, i really do, but i'm not interested in sitting through who knows how many more episodes of him trying to learn this lesson again, i'm just not.

the thing with eddie and marisol was actually cute and it went more or less how i expected tbh. the way she was re-introduced left very little doubt that eddie would date her again. (given the lack of set-up, tho, i wouldn't be surprised if they opened up s7 with the relationship having fizzled out during the time-gap).

when i saw the synopsis mentioning the lees, i thought they might appear in a montage of sorts with chim recovering and i'm disappointed we didn't get to see that, especially with the stuff with chim's dad. (side note: 911 really needs to do better on the chimney front. i'm gonna need a season 7 that treats him like his own person for the entirety of it, not just maddie's partner. 6B has given us some of that, but i need more).

i'm actually glad they didn't rush the madney wedding. the bathena wedding being the way it was kinda made sense given the circumstances of how they got together in the first place, and how their relationship progressed from there. madney on the other hand—they've always taken things slow, they've been cautious and thoughtful while taking each step, largely because of their own past and baggage. what worked for bathena wouldn't really work for them, especially considering maddie's trauma surrounding marriage, i'm really glad they didn't rush this.

[b-blushes]

medical/health stuff (maybe upsetting? but also this is just my life so my gauge is off 😅)

god okay. this time last year i was feeling so ill that i went to the dr like 'something very bad is happening to me it feels like there is something wrong with my cells. like. my cells are empty' and i had some tests done and one of my results was pretty low so i got 'treated' for it - levels increased by not quite 3x original result. dr says that's fine and i stop the treatment (low level meds). feels like i can breathe again. nice. had been feeling so bad that this felt good. this year i am still feeling bad. gets to the point where i'm like okay i have once again got to go to the dr because my fatigue is still really disabling and i don't want to leave this as 'well you have like 4 different conditions that could cause fatigue so it's probs that dw' because what if there is a chance of feeling less bad. i know i'm never going to be well but i could be less bad. i'm only really able to leave the house once a week for a few hours at most unless i want to get too unwell to like. live my life in isolation at home in addition to that. not ideal for a person to be living with maybe average of 5 hours a week total of 'contact with other humans' but u know how it is being disabled in a pandemic. (bad) i do some research because once again you know how it is being disabled (gps have quite often never heard of some diagnoses i have and do not know how to handle management of them, given that sometimes they have not even known which specialist i needed to be referred to to be assessed or diagnosed when i presented with these symptoms. so i did that research myself and talked it through with them and got it done). turns out the fatigue clinic requires results TEN TIMES my original result so that 3x improvement was not going to cut it. who knows what my levels are like a year later also. so i am going back specifically with regard to this. anyway. go to my appointment and have more tests. back to 2x original which is 5x lower than what the fatigue clinic lists as the lowest levels a patient with them should have. ask to be referred for like. proper treatment this time. i'm going to the hospital next week. (shouldn't be a big thing or have side effects particularly) i am feeling many things about this! i only have access to 4 years of test results for this thing, but in those 4 years i have never once reached the minimum threshold of results set for the fatigue clinic. the best i got was 3/5ths of the way there. if this treatment makes a difference to my fatigue it will literally be life changing. maybe i can, like, live in the world more. the implications on the last however many years of my life though, if this is the case and i didn't have to be living like this all this time, are a bit uhhhh soul destroying. BUT if it makes a difference at least i got there. and at least i've had my back all this time doing what research i can. grateful to all the drs who have listened to what i've had to say and have been willing to make referrals for me when they had no clue what was going on with me. also conflicting feelings about. like. how bare minimum this is and how that's been a 'good' outcome for medical care for me. but we stay silly because what else can we do!!!

[alexey-slay21]

bangchan x male reader

Y/n wants to get a job at Jyp ent. as a manager. He still in the "training period" and he's affiliated to Christopher bang chan, leader of stray kids (wow didn't expect at all). Who knows what will happen between this young man and our dadd- I mean Aussie gentleman :)

*Y/n POV*

I was sitting on a chair in the hall at jyp, I'm reading the schedule for the week my colleague just gave me and damn it's so full and I almost can't even go to the bathroom... everything is planned perfectly, even sleep hours...

I take my phone and I check the time, it's almost 8:00 am, I'll have to start soon. I get up from the chair and I take the papers I have to leave to bangchan.

I enter the elevator and I press the floor button, the doors close and it starts moving up. I arrive at the floor where there are most of te studios and i look forward to his studio. When I find it i knock on the door and i wait him to answer.

He didn't answered but instead he opened the door.

Y/n: "I got some papers for you"- I hand him the documents 

Chan: "you must be the new manager?"

Y/n: "Yeah" i answer nervously

He quickly reads te papers "ok, everything is here, thank you for the delivery... btw what's your name?" He asked

Y/n: "Y/n"

Chan: "that's a nice name, where are you from?"

Y/n: "Y/c (your country)"

Chan: "really!? I've always wanted to visit y/c. Are you going to be by my side now on?"

Y/n:"I think I still have to figure out what I'll do but I think I'll be with you for some time"

Chan:"ohh, got it! So you're still in your training time... don't worry we'll be fine" he said smiling 

I'm more nervous than before and he noticed 

Chan:"don't worry y/n, you'll do great, I'm sure of that"

Y/n: "I hope so"

Chan:"you're too nervous my boy! Relax haha, i think you'll be one of the best managers of the whole company, trust me" he's trying to cheer me up 

Chan:"so I have a meeting in half an hour? To decide next comeback stuff right?"

Y/n:"Yes you're right"

While waiting the time to pass we got to know each other better... the time passed quickly and the meeting was there.

I take Chan to the meeting and after an hour we finished.

Y/n:"Stray kids have to do a lot of of stuff this month"

Chan: Yeah... It's true that it's going to be a busy month with the comeback, photo shoot, interview, all... I know it will be long and sometimes tiring, but don't worry"

We walk down the hall, ready to leave the building 

Chan:"let's go back to the dorm, I'm gonna introduce you to the other members" he says smiling 

Y/n: "Sounds good" I reply 

Chan: "Don't be shy on the way boy, I will introduce you one by one to everyone!"

A few months passed and I became pretty close to Chan and the kids and now I'm officially his manager and one of his close friends.

I'm on the roof of the dorm with chan, he's been sitting there for a while looking at the sky...

Chan: "Ahh, y/n, this weather is amazing, right? I don't want to go back inside... I just want to watch the clouds moving slowly in the sky... it's so relaxing, I love this moment..." I decide to look up at the clouds too...

Y/n:"I think it's gonna rain soon..." he looks at me and then back to the dark clouds in the sky

Chan: "Yeah you're right... The weather is changing quite fast compared to a few minutes ago... But the calm before the storm is amazing, I like this" 

Y/n:"Yeah you're right... btw I really have to finish planning some stuff on the computer... do you mind stay here alone or you want to come in too?" He quickly looks at me 

Chan: "I think I'll stay here, I really enjoy looking at the weather, dw I'll go inside later"

Y/n:"Ok see ya then... and don't get the rain" I say joking 

Chan: "don't worry I won't" he smiles at me while I'm leaving the rooftop.

I go down the stairs and I reach my apartment's door, I open it and I get inside.

I turn on the lights and I sit at my desk while I take my portable.

My dog comes to greet me and then she lays next to my chair so i start working.

After an hour and half I'm done, I stretch myself and I decide to get up from the chair to check if Chan is still outside.

I reach again the roof and when I open the door I see chan still sitting on the same chair as earlier, his hair and clothes completely wet and he's humming a song.

I walk towards him and when he notice me he looks at me and he smiles.

Y/n: "I told you to don’t get wet... you're so stubborn man, you'll get sick" I fake a disappointed face 

Chan: "ohh, y/n, you're here... yk... I was too busy enjoying this moment, I love to watch the clouds and to listen to the sound of the rain" 

*Chan POV* 

he's so cute... he really came back to check on me... I look at him and i involuntarily smile, I feel like my cheeks burning... what the hell is happening g to me?! Why I'm feeling this way... I feel so dumb rn

*y/n POV*

Y/n: "I think you'll need some dry clothes"

Chan: "oh, yeah right, I'm kinda wet... I think I should definitely go inside now hahahaha"

Y/n: "let's go then" I offer him my hand so he can stand up from where he's sitting

We go inside and he opens the door of skz dorm, we enter and we took off our shoes and then we walk to the bathroom to look for some towels. We find some and he starts drying his hair.

Y/n: "I'm bringing you some dry clothes from your room, tell me what you need"

Chan: "oh, thank you were much y/n! I think i really need to change completely... you can bring me... lemme think... oh yeah, a shirt, sweatpants, socks etc..."

Y/n: "brb"

I close the bathroom door and I enter his room, it's always so cozy, I like it. I open his wardrobe and i take what he needs and the I come back to him and I nock on the door. After a while he answers and I enter. He was wrapped with a big towel, he kinda looks like a big burrito, I give him the clothes and then I leave him changing while i come back to his room.

After a while he exits the bathroom and joins me. When i look at him I notice that his natural curls are back end I giggle at this sight.

Chan: "what's so funny?"

Y/n: "I'm not used to see you with curly hair but it suits you. Btw what are we doing now? Any plans?"

Chan: "what about watching a movie? Sounds good to you?"

Y/n: "yeah, any movie on mind?

Chan: "well... actually naur (lol), I was hoping you to recommend some hehe"

Y/n: "lemme think... we can watch Deadpool or... Spider-Man across the spiderverse I always wanted to watch it"

Chan: "the 2nd one sounds good, I watched the first one but never watched this one"

I take his computer from the desk near the bed and I turn it on

Y/n: "password... always the same?" Chan nods, I digit the password and I open a streaming app and i search the movie and I start giggling and he looks at me confused 

Y/n: "I'm selling your music files" I type on the keyboard pretending I'm doing something bad with his computer 

Chan: "hahaha, not funny y/n, I would kill you if you do that, I've worked hard on those songs. Stop you're making me anxious"

*Chan POV*

 I look at him, ik he's joking, I'm feeling a kind of possessiveness towards him... why?! I don't understand... what's this feeling? Why am I feeling something towards him? I like girls, i want a girlfriend, why do i feel this way? I keep staring at y/n who's using my computer and idk why I suddenly grab his wrist stopping him and then I realise how stupid I'm. Why I did that?! Maybe he's gonna think I'm weird... so i take my computer back and i sit on the bed with the laptop on my legs and I put the movie ready to be watched.

Chan: "okay, fine I'm not mad at you , now let's watch the movie"

He's silent but as i look at him I feel something strange on my chest. I need to ask him something...

Chan: "so... umm, y/n,  need to ask you something... you're not in a relationship is tat correct? I don't look at his face while asking this

Y/n: "I have one"

Chan: "who... is it a girl? My voice is getting softer, I'm trying to hide the fact that I'm feeling somehow jealous 

Y/n: "Yeah, she looses a lot of fur all around the house, when it's hot she drools a lot and sometimes she bites me when she wants attention hahahaha"

I start laughing at the description 

Chan: "a dog hahah? You're living with a dog , don't you?

Y/n: "yeah the cutest good girl, she's the love of my life hahah"

I laugh again at what he just said, then I look at him, it's my turn to be serious

Chan: "Okay okay, I get it that you love your dog, I'm happy for you! But... What about girls? Do you have a *human* girlfriend?"

Y/n: "my dog is jealous"

I try not to laugh but I think about him having a girlfriend and my heart is burning right now

Okay, I'm getting impatient, I need to be direct and ask him if there's someone in his life

Chan: "I meant do you have a girlfriend that is... Not a dog?" My voice is getting more and more serious

Y/n: "who needs one?"

I look at him, wanting an honest answer.

Chan: "Wait what? Don't get me wrong but... Isn't it better to have a girlfriend that... You know... You can *kiss*, and *hug* her? I mean... You can't do this with your dog?

I can't keep a neutral expression anymore, it's obvious that I'm jealous of this dog right now or maybe it's just me thinking about him having a *imaginary* relationship with someone else who's not me?

Chan: "So... You'd rather be with... Your dog... Than with a person?" I say this slowly, I feel like he's hurting my heart

I feel like crying now, I regret asking these questions. I look at him, seeing how sweet he talks about this dog, I feel bad for being jealous.

Chan: "so you see yourself in the future alone? Like you and a dog only? I want a romantic partner, I want him, but he's telling me that he can always have a dog in his life? I feel betrayed. I take a breath and I finally say it

Chan: "What about a romantic partner? Like a girlfriend? Or... A wife?"

Y/n: "man, idk, I don't even know what I'll do tomorrow i cannot think about big things like future or if ill be with someone or not"

I don't like his answer... But I can't blame him, he's younger (or older) than me. But still, he's old enough to have a girlfriend... If he likes girls, he must be having one, right...? Idk... 

Y/n looks kinda annoyed about the conversation we're having but I can't help myself,  jealousy is the only thing I can feel rn

Y/n: "what about you? Ur 25 and you haven't been in a relationship yet"

Chan: "don't change the topic" I'm holding myself to don't show my emotions, i feel like he's hiding something from me, what if he has a girlfriend and h don't want me to know? Jealousy is kicking in harder 

Chan: "Are you having a girlfriend? I'm asking for the 100th time y.n, it's a simple question, is it so difficult to answer?"

Y/n: "does it really matter?"

Chan: "Yes it matters!" I can't hold my emotions anymore, I can't pretend to be fine right now, I'm getting pissed off

Chan: "I just want to know if you're dating a girl, that's all I need to know... Because if you're dating someone... Then I need to stop thinking about you that much, I need to move on... I need to stop feeling this painful jealousy... I can't do this anymore..."

tears start running down from my cheeks, I fucked up. I run to the bathroom and I lock the door behind me and I leave y/n alone in your room.

I sit on the floor with my hands in my face, I feel pain and I need a moment to try and calm down.

What have I done? Why did I ask him that... It's so stupid, I was able to control myself for 30 minutes, I can't believe I talked so much about this dog and his imaginary girlfriend. Did I want to hear the truth or am I really crazy? Why is he so nice and cute, I'm going to ruin everything if I don't act normal from now on...

Y/n: "CHRISTOPHER OPEN THIS DAMN DOOR"

I hear y/n's voice outside the bathroom, his tone is not aggressive but it sounds more worried than anything.

I take a deep breath, trying to calm down, and get my emotions under control before I open the door again and see him face to face... I regret not thinking twice about what I asked him.

Chan: "Okay okay, give me a second please..."

I take a deep breath and as soon as i open the door y/n hugs me tightly.

Y/n: "don't you dare to do something like this again" he tightened the hug

I start crying when he hugs me, I feel his arms and I can't believe he's hugging me. He's so kind... But he's making me feel worse, because he's hugging me like he's my boyfriend or... Maybe like a lover...

I try to avoid his hug and I push him away slightly but he keeps hugging me

Chan: "Just... Let me go... The fact that you're hugging me, makes me believe that you like me... I don't want to be delusional... You don't want anything more than friendship right?"

Y/n: "we cn talk about what happened but please don't get away or take distance from me" 

he cares about me or... he's  just trying to don't make me feel weird?

He keeps hugging me and it's making me feel horrible... I don't want to be the weirdo I was some minutes ago anymore, I don't want to be obsessed with a guy who's hugging me right now... But I can't fight those damn emotions, he's making me feel like I mean a lot to him... Why is he treating me like this? I can't do it anymore, I let myself fall on the floor and I sit there hugging my knees.

I stay on the floor as y/n was doing too, I'm trying not to cry anymore. It's awkward for me now, he's hugging me while I'm sitting as if he was my boyfriend, and after the way we've spoken with each other, we're probably not going back to speaking as best friends so fast...

I don't dare to look at him now, I just stay in this position, not knowing what to say or to do to fix this situation...

I take a deep breath while he rubs my back like if we're together.

So he's not dating, this means that he's single... But why did he have to hug me like this? Is he trying to give false hopes?

Chan: "can you please let me go now? I say this in a low tone, I'm trying not to sound rude, but I want to get up and stop feeling like this...

y/n: "yeah... sure... I-I'm sorry for making you feel this way, I have  even noticed you felt something"

Chan: "It's okay, I just need a moment to get up from the floor, can you please let me go now?" *I feel awkward as hell but I can't believe he was hugging me and I can't do anything because this hug was way too good and sweet, I need to control my emotions right now.

I slowly stand up, still avoiding y/n's eyes

Chan: "I-I'm fine now... I don't need your hug anymore... I feel normal..." Why am I lying so much? I want to feel like he feels something for me... I need to stop this stupid thoughts.

Chan: "I'm just... Need a minute to be alone, I'm fine really..." I try to walk away but I hesitate, I'm not sure if I should just keep talking to him and forget what just happened or leave for real this time...

Y/n: "Maybe it's better if I leave for now..."

He's leaving? I should feel happy about this but it's not what I want... I feel the urge to stop him from walking out the door... But I don't want to say anything, it's stupid if I ask him to stay after all that just happened. It's my fault I hate myself 

I stay still and I wait for his reaction, I don't know what to do to fix this situation... I really screwed up by acting like that.

Y/n: "If you need anything call me ok? The other members should come back to the dorm soon. See ya Chris"

After he leaves I lay down on my bed hoping that I just had a nightmare, but I know that this is real... I screwed up and I ruined our relationship... Why did I let myself have all these silly feelings for a guy that likes girls? He likes someone else, I need to get over him.

A few hours passed, its almost midnight and I receive a text from y/n

💬 Best brah: you ok? Have you eaten?

💬me: I'm fine... haven't eaten much today but I'll menage 

I reply to his text, I just hope it's not gonna b awkward between us after what I did.

💬Best brah: eat something!!

He's so caring...why is he ignoring the fact that i acted weird...

💬Me: I'll eat tomorrow... I wanna ask you something, can I?

💬Best brah: eating is important, take care. Btw what's the question?

💬Me: How do you feel about what happened this afternoon? I hope I didn't make it awkward between us because you're the most amazing guy I know... 

I click send and I wait for his response, I feel anxious not gonna lie

💬Best brah: I'm sure you didn't wanted to act that way. It happens... it can happen to everyone to loose control of their emotions and you're human too. I'm not mad at you.

He doesn't hate me... that's relieving 

💬Best brah: we can always talk about it sooner or later, but maybe for the moment it's better if you take some time by yourself to think about it. Can we make this week pass? Do you think we can do it?

My heart skips a beat when I read "can we make this week pass?", I start overthinking again... Wait, he wants to wait before talking to me... What does this mean? Does this mean he's not comfortable with me anymore because of what I am? I start worrying a lot now*

💬Me: Of course, if that's what you want. 

I feel a bit disappointed by the idea of not talking with him for a whole week but I want to respect his wish

💬Best brah: we can se each other this week as well but It'll be just for work purposes and then next Sunday we'll talk about it

Oh... This means that he doesn't want to see me that much this week, but for work reasons he can't totally avoid me... This is so weird to me because I was expecting a different answer, a more... Loving answer but I'm probably delusional...

💬Me: okay, I got it... If that's what you want... Let's do that.

💬Best brah: I won't ignore you ok?

💬Me: I know, I trust you. You don't need to ignore me, we'll just act as normal.

💬Best brah: Take care and eat during this week ok? Promise? 

💬Me: promise... I'll eat something this week. Gnight 

💬Best brah: tomorrow as usual we have to meet up in front the building to go to jyp. Good night Chris 

I turn off my phone too and I stay in my bed, trying to sleep, but I can't just close my eyes, I'm too nervous and anxious... He's okay with me, he doesn't hate me, but he's avoiding me a bit, he wants us to act normal, and that's good for me, I can try and behave like nothing happened and I don't feel anything for him... This is my only hope to be happy again...

Skip time

*Y/n's POV*

The week is almost over, it's Friday. After a long day at jyp i come back to my apartment and I take my phone.

💬Me: eaten?

💬Chris Bahhhng: yeah I ate some toast in the morning, it's fine

💬Me: it's 9:47pm... you only had breakfast...

💬Chris Bahhhng: yeah, I know I should probably eat more but... I've been stressed and tired, it's hard for me to eat. But don't worry, I'm gonna eat a normal dinner

💬Me: Be honest man... how much did you eat during past days?

💬Chris Bahhhng: well... I only ate one toast and coffee in the morning as well as some bread and water during the day... It's been a bit difficult to eat more than that...

💬Me: not good man

💬Chris Bahhhng: I know, I'm trying... But it's kind of hard to eat when I don't feel like doing anything.

💬Me: ik it's hard but pls take care of yourself ok? I have to go now maybe I'll text you later 

A few hours passed, he only viewed my text but didn't reply. He's worrying me a little but now he's with his members, they would tell me if anything is wrong... so I go to sleep

Skip time

*Chan's POV*

Saturday passed quickly... it's already Sunday, the day of the "talk"

I'm laying down in my bed, facing the ceiling... I'm taking deep breaths... why do I feel like this...

I decide to get up and get ready for work when I noticed a text from y/n on my Lock Screen

💬Best brah: hey... today there's a change of plans... there was a mistake on your schedule so you have a day off

💬Me: oh, okay, I get it now, thank you for the clarification. *I feel relieved now that I know the plan is still on... 

I just have to be extra careful to act normal in front of him today

💬Me: what time do you plan on coming to the dorm?

💬Best brah: mhhh... 1:00 pm, I'll bring something to eat 

I get excited when I read his message, at least he's still coming to the dorm, that means we're still gonna see each other... He's even bringing lunch for both of us, I guess I'm gonna have to eat something today then... God, he's so sweet... Oh damn... I think I'm doing it again, I'm gonna have to stop thinking this way as soon as possible

💬Me: I will make sure to be ready for when you come, thanks for bringing me lunch, I'm gonna eat something for once! See you later~

It's almost 1:00pm and I hear someone knocking at the door 

I feel a bit nervous... Ik It's y/m, I hope he doesn't notice that I'm not looking so good today... I open the door for him

Y/n enters the dorm, I feel the urge to hug him once more... I just can't help it, he's so sweet and I just love the way he smells... I must focus on the lunch now, I don't want to ruin my chances with him, the mood seems calm for now, I need to act normal.

He has a bag in his hand... he bought me my fav noodles...

The noodles smell so good! This guy is so sweet... I try to eat a bit of them but my stomach feels full and I can't eat that much...

I force myself to eat as much as I possibly can, it's hard because my stomach is hurting but I don't want y/n to be concerned about me anymore...

Chan: "these are really good noodles btw, thanks for bringing them..."

I look at y/n, I hope he doesn't notice that I feel really bad after eating... My body is not used to eating this much...

I finish my bowl and I feel my stomach is getting filled with a lot of pain again, it feels really hard to act normal at this point

Chan: "well, they were really good, I'm just a bit full at the moment, I'll let you enjoy yours now"

I try to smile but I'm not sure if it's a good enough smile to make him believe that I'm happy right now... What should I do?

Y/n: "not feeling good right?"

God, i can't lie to him, I'm not feeling like eating, I'm not feeling like doing anything, all I want is to sit next to him and hug him

Chan: "yeah... I kinda feel like throwing up... I should take a break so I'll just sit here on the couch for a bit..."

He finished his noodles and he sits with me on the couch, I want to put my head on his shoulder, I want to get closer to him, he's so warm... I feel really safe when I'm with him. My stomach is hurting again, it's like my body is telling me that I'm doing something wrong here... Did I eat too much?...

I'm staring down at my stomach, I'm  focusing on my pain and I feel him wrapping an arm around my waist and putting his hand on my stomach.

Chan: "it's not really easy to talk... but... I haven't eaten properly this whole week, that's why my stomach hurts... I feel sick and I don't know how long I can keep this up..."

Y/n: "wanna go to the bathroom? You don't look great rn..."

I can't talk, all I can do now is nod my head in response, I feel like throwing up more than before, I can barely move but I need to try... I need to go to the restroom now, it hurts so much...

I can feel it in my throat and in my stomach... He's not holding my shoulder anymore, now I'm holding his hand tightly as I get up from the couch and I run to the bathroom.

I get inside the bathroom and I start to feel nauseous. I have to hold the toilet lid because I can't stand up. I try to breathe and to calm myself down, I don't want to vomit, I don't want Y/n to see that or to hear it, I try to control it, but it's really hard for me

Chan: "please, don't come inside, it... it... it smells really bad here, I just... have... have..." 

I start to throw up inside the toilet... I feel so ashamed, I'm a mess.

I hear the door being opened and his steps behind me 

Oh god, it hurts so much, I'm losing everything I ate this afternoon, I can't look at him right now, I'm so embarrassed and my throat hurts so bad, I don't know what to... The last bit of food comes out of my stomach and my eyes tear up... I can't let him see me like this, I would probably feel so much worse. I try to go away from him so he can't see me feeling so shameful

Chan: stay away, please! Just... Just... 

I try to say something more but I throw up again... I feel like crying rn

I can feel his hand on my forehead keeping my hair from falling on my eyes, I try to push his hand away, I don't want him to touch me right now.

Chan: "please, just... Please..."

I feel sick again and I try to walk away from his hand... I throw up more and I'm crying right now. My stomach feels like I've been punched and my throat is burning. I don't want him to see me like this, feeling so sick, with so many tears and so much shame in my eyes now.

He slowly starts to rub my back, his touch feels good, I calm down a bit. I sit on the toilet and my throat and stomach are burning even more than before. I'm breathing heavily and it's hard for me to stay still... I can't say anything right now, I just want to feel less sick and to stop throwing up.

The cramps and the burning in my stomach are so bad that I feel like throwing up again, but this time it's just bile since there's nothing else that could come out of my stomach now.

Y/n: "hey... feeeling a lil better man?

My stomach feels a bit better now, I have to take deep breaths but the pain is a bit less intense now. My throat is so exhausted and burning, it's hard to talk, I only nod as my answer

Chan: "yeah, it's a bit better now... it wasn't good to eat everything at once after not eating for days..."

Y/n: "yeah Ik... have you tough about our talk?"

Oh god, I wasn't expecting to talk about that now, it's making me feel nervous, what should I say? I can't lie to him again but I still don't know what to say... Should I just tell him more about what I want and about my feelings for him?

Chan: "well... I was thinking a lot and..."

I take a deep breath and I can taste the acid coming from my stomach, that's not a good sign...

Y/n: "sorry sorry. I didn't want to put more pressure on you, when you'll  feel better and ready we can talk ok?"

Thank god he's not pushing me to talk, I can't handle so many emotions right now, it's making me feel sick again... If I try to talk about my feelings for him it's gonna make me feel even more sick, I don't know if it's good for me now... But I know I have to talk to him about it, he won't give up on me easily... What should I do? What should I say? What words will make him understand that I just want him to be happy?

He dried some sweat off my face with a towel

Y/n: "are you finished here? We can come back to the living room or to your room if you want"

Chan: "maybe my room"

Y/n: "ok let's go there then"

Y/n takes my hand and leads me to my room, as he opens the door we both enter. His hand feels so warm and soft, I feel like it's holding all my thoughts and worries, I can't focus on anything just now, not with him so close to me now...

I sit in my bed and I look at him waiting for him to sit down next to me, I want to be as close to him as possible, but I know this is not a good idea, I need to focus on talking to him and to telling him how I feel about everything.

I close my eyes for a bit, I try to breathe and to calm myself down, but I just can't stop thinking about him now... His voice, his smell, the way he looks at me... Why is he so perfect and caring?

He lays down on my bed too. I finally open my eyes, I see him laying next to me. He's so close to me and he's just staring at my face. I feel like he's analyzing everything about me right now and this thought is making me feel uncomfortable and awkward... I want y/n to just be himself while laying next to me, I don't want our first time together alone and without the rest of skz to be a bad one or a weird one... But, damn, I wish I could stop my thoughts from going in so many different directions, just focus on what's happening now.

After some minutes he boops my nose and I start to blush a bit and I feel a bit of embarrassment

Chan: "oh, well, I guess... Yeah, I tend to overthink a lot, and... how did you know I was overthinking?"

I stay silent now, I don't know what else to say, I was just starting to feel a bit more comfortable next to him...

Y/n: "your face tells me everything..."

Chan: "well... You're right, my face gives it away... I was still trying to prepare for telling you how I feel about everything, but now that you're here, laying next to me... I don't know... You're making me a bit nervous now..." I giggle a bit because I feel so awkward and embarrassed

Y/n: "you don't have to be nervous when you're with me Chris"

I look at him and I feel my heart beating so fast right now, I want to be myself but he's so close, his eyes are like the universe on his face. I feel so attracted to him and now that I'm thinking about this I can't keep myself calm, I start to feel even more nervous...

I try to talk but I can't, it feels like a hundred butterflies are buzzing in my stomach now.

Chan: "I'm... I'm-"

Y/n: " do you think we can start our talk?"

The way he says it makes me feel nervous, it's like he's expecting too much from me, but at the same time I can't wait to tell him everything that's been in my mind this whole month. I can't say a single word now, the words won't come out and my heart rate is getting faster every second... I just nod, my face is completely red, I feel like I'm gonna combust at any moment.

Y/n: "Well... maybe we can start from what you told me last week before what happened.

I close my eyes and I think about last week, what I said to him and what I said about my feelings for him. Now that he's asking me to talk about everything again, I want to keep my head straight and to make him understand how I feel without all the crying and stuff, without making him feel bad for me. The way he's looking at me while listening to what I'm gonna say right now is making it ten times harder than it already is... I just need to stop overthinking and to speak... I'm not gonna cry now, I can do this.

I try to focus on the feeling of the butterflies in my stomach and how y/n is looking at me right now, but the memory of what I said last week is coming back... The sentences, the voice I said them with, how I felt... I hate this...

Chan: "I guess I meant that I should stop thinking about you so much, that I should stop feeling so jealous of everything and also upset... Because... Because I can't stop thinking about you now, and I just..." 

I close my eyes, I can't be honest now. I hate that I'm lying to y/n again...

Y/n: "and?"

Chan: I think I meant that I should stop letting you ruin my life, that I need to stop thinking about you... That I need to move on and focus on myself, I can't keep thinking about someone who probably doesn't love me..."

 I feel so confused and uncomfortable when I try to say these words to him... This is just like last week, I was completely honest with him and it made everything so much worse...*

Y/n: "I think we both know that you don't really mean this..."

He's probably right. I open my eyes again, I look at him and I force myself to nod. 

Chan: "I wanted to tell you that I can't keep thinking of someone who... Who doesn't love me back..." 

The words feel so bitter in my mouth, the more I speak the more pain I feel inside my chest now.

Y/n: "well... that's not totally true... I do love you but maybe not yet as the same way as you love me... but I think that somehow it may work... I mean between us... we just need time"

I can't believe my ears, is he finally saying something about his feelings? I look at him again, his eyes look so beautiful and I want to be close to him so bad, but I have to be calm and reasonable, he's trying to be honest and to talk about his feelings so I have to do it too now... I take a deep breath and I try to control my emotions and to speak in a calm and clear way...I feel like I'm gonna cry now, my throat hurts again.

Some tears running down my cheeks while y/n tries to wipe them away with his sleeve.

He's staring at my wet chocolate eyes, he has a little smile on his face and i can feel butterflies back in my stomach. He's so perfect, i have a chance, maybe my only chance to be with him.

I do understand what he meant, I know that we're still just getting to know each other now and we need to go gradually, see where this goes... I want to start something with him but it might be too early now... His eyes look so peaceful and calming right now, just staring at the ceiling while I'm looking at him... He's so close to me, the urge to kiss him right now is becoming so overwhelming right now... I need to do something to change my own mind, otherwise I don't know what can happen...

He offers me his hand, i grab it and then he lays back down on the bed next to me. We're  laughing holding hands... Am I dreaming? It's too perfect to be real.

After some time I decide to come closer to him and to put my head on his shoulder. I need more physical contact rn, I'm really craving for some.

Y/n just looks at me and has he could read me as an open book, he slides his arms around me and he hugs me tightly. My head on his chest, I can smell his scent and I love it.

Y/n's hug makes me forget about everything in the moment, every thought in my mind disappears completely. The only thing I feel now is him, his body next to mine, it's perfect... I feel so safe and protected now...

Chan: "are you ok with this?"

I whisper quietly, afraid to ruin the moment we're sharing right now... I'm just so happy he hasn't let go of me yet, I don't want this moment to end now...

Y/n: "yk I'm not really used to physical contact but I think I can get used to this"

His words make me smile, I feel like I wanna kiss him right now, but I don't want to push it too much, he already seems so comfortable with me and with our physical proximity, I don't want him to feel like I'm forcing him to do something... If I could, I would kiss him right now but I'm not sure if he's ok with that. I just want us to be happy now, I'm just so happy that he let me be this close to him... I look up into his magnetic eyes, the whole galaxy is in there... he's so close now, the way he looks at me... I want to kiss his lips right now, I want to feel him even closer to me...I whisper, my voice is almost too low for him to hear...

Chan: "y/n, can I be honest with you about something?"

Y/n: "mh?"

Chan: "can I kiss you? Because right now I feel like I really, really need to..."

I see him thinking for some seconds, I can feel one of his hands caressing the back of my head and no he's looking back at me.

I feel like my whole body is trembling inside, my heart is beating so fast, it's like I'm on fire right now, I'm feeling so much right now without knowing why I'm feeling like this in this moment... All I feel is his touch...

I lean my head closer to his lips and I close my eyes, I really need to kiss him... he's not trying to push me away, he's gently pushing my head towards his. My heart rate just doubled the second he pushed my head towards his, now our faces are close to each other, my eyes are now fully closed, I feel like I'm on cloud nine right now, like I'm dreaming...

It's like an electric energy buzzing in the air between us... And then I go even closer to his lips to make another move...

Our lips touching and our first kiss was... Something I can't even describe with words right now... It felt like the whole world just stopped in this moment, not a thing mattered other than the feeling I was getting when our lips finally touched. Everything was perfect, perfect and warm and soft and I felt so safe. For a second I thought he was gonna pull away but then he kept our kiss for a few seconds more... His lips were so soft and our kiss was so gentle, I felt like I wanted to stay like that forever... He made me feel so alive...*

[theladyheroine]

Kingdom Hearts x Star Wars! 🪐

So recently I’ve been getting really into a Kingdom Hearts mood and this is a bit less of a crossover headcanon and more of an idea? I’ve heard that Star Wars is a possible world for KH4 so I figured why not try my own take! This is basically what I think might happen if we were to get a Star Wars World in KH4! Thank you for tuning in!

✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ Characters ✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚

Now for starters, we gotta talk about Luke Skywalker as a party member! He’s the ultimate Star Wars character (please don’t be upset 😅🙏)! I have a feeling Sora might see him as a kinda mentor type figure, seeing as Luke is older than him & he does get a bit more serious by the time of Return of the Jedi. Although he still has that kind, but reckless farm boy attitude so I think he’ll get along with Sora pretty well or even Kairi! While Kairi is a bit more soft spoken, I feel like she’ll connect pretty well with Luke due to his ways with the force & wisdom he’s received from Master Yoda.

Another trilogy character I feel would make it into KH4 is Han Solo! The greatest pilot in the galaxy and his Millenium Falcon would definitely make an appearance. I feel Sora might like him because he's cool but I also feel Han might but heads with Riku just a bit. It's mostly because Riku himself is a bit impulsive in a way, despite being calm and collected he’s also willing to do things his way first. Maybe they both bicker about where to head next or who does what in the ship.

Another thing that might be cool is if Chewbacca were a character you could summon as an ally. Maybe he could launch the characters into the air for some kind of light blast attack or maybe he just goes around smashing obstacles and stuff for you? Kinda like Wreck-It-Ralph but hairier.

Okay next one! This is a bit less tied to KH4 actually, but I thought it would be a good idea for maybe a Birth by Sleep AU! Although real quick, I unfortunately barely started watching the Clone Wars a few weeks ago, but I really liked this idea. 😅 But dw, I know at least the major parts & about Rex & Cody so hopefully this is okay. 😅🙏

Okay anywho, the Clone Wars and/or The Bad Batch is next on my list! Since this period of Star Wars mostly takes place before the empire, or at least right when the Empire takes over, this might tie into Birth by Sleep a bit more since BBS is a KH prequel. Or at least maybe this can be a cool alternate world for KH4 since the Clone Wars series is so popular. Anyways though, I feel Aqua might fit a bit more into the Star Wars universe simply because I feel her calm and noble demeanor resembles that of a Jedi knight. After all, she is a Keyblade master, people might mistake her for a Jedi or at least force-sensitive.

Plus, it might be a interesting balance for the Clone Troopers, since I know that the Clones take their brotherhood very seriously. Aqua and the rest of the Keyblade wielders might compare that to their friendships.

A few other characters I’d like to include is Ahsoka, Master Yoda, Obi-Wan Kenobi, although maybe the old man version of him too lol. But these are just a few ideas for the worlds as party members, but I can see the Keyblade weilders helping these guys along in their own personal stories maybe?

✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ New Areas & Places ✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚

Tatooine - This planet I can see as a starting point for the gang, as Tatooine is like a main setting for most Star Wars content even though it's a pretty shady place. I can imagine quests such as helping villagers with their daily tasks, fixing ships, and keeping thugs off the peoples' backs as you navigate. Although, one fight I've heard people talk about is having either Jabba or Sarlacc as a boss fight. Plus, its where Luke Skywalker lives so it might work!

Endor - This one I feel might play a bigger role than Tatooine simply due to its role during the trilogy too. Plus, forest-y planets are also seen alot in Star Wars, which is I think to add mystery I guess? But maybe the gang ends up taking shelter on Endor and happen to run into, say, Princess Leia? And they have to help her and the rebels fight off the Empire!

Coruscant - This one also adds into the whole Clone Wars-BirthBySleep AU, but this might be an option in KH4. Since Coruscant is the capital of the galaxy, I can see maybe it being mentioned at least? Plus, since most of the gang doesn't live in a world with alot of technology other than the datascape, it would be intersting to see them marvel at all the technology there. Plus, maybe they mistake Coruscant for the city Sora's in? Since they don't really know about Shibuya yet.

Okay I think that's everything but thank you for listening! I hope this was fun! I really hope we get a Star Wars world in Kingdom Hearts but I'm thinking about making a few most posts like these for KH4, but anyways thank you!

[i-willstealyourtoes]

Hey 👋. It's so nice to see a fellow sleeping dogs fan! I was wondering if you had any headcanons for Wei, Jackie, and Winston?

Hi!! I agree, I was worried to think I was the only simp fan here! I apologise in advance for how out-of-character some of this might be, especially with Winston 😭

Also I feel like this turned into first date headcanons???? Mb lol-

Wei, Jackie and Winston and their s/o

Wei

- Okay I know its confirmed that Wei is a player so

- I think in the very start of y'all being flirty and stuff, he'd definitely still be 'in the market' or whatever

- Although, when he met you he definitely did keep back a little bit

- Not to put you on a pedestal, but he was quite charmed from the very beginning

- Anyways, I think he was most enchanted by either your sense of humour, your down to earth vibe or that laugh of yours

- Maybe all 3? Yeah, probably all 3

- We know Wei is incredibly good at flirting so he'd definitely have no issue at all trying to get close with you (the og rizz master)

- Though he might have felt a little nervous the more he became attached to you

- I mean, with all the others he just kind of... liked them and then he moved on??

- You though??? He became rather attached to you :)

- I mean, you're different !! You're so... you?

- It's hard to describe okay, he just likes you alot

- So when he asks you out he does feel a little anxious

- 'Hey, so uh- You wanna go somewhere together? Like a date, I mean.'

- Like, what if you declined and you stopped being friends altogether??? 😭

- Ofc his fear melted when you agreed to date

- He wanted the first date to be something more... casual?

- But also pretty cool ofc bc you deserve something rlly nice

- He decided he was just going to take you to like... this really picturesque spot that had a view of the sea/the city

- Yes, he did indeed plan it correctly so you guys could watch the sunset <333

- 'See? Told you it'd be worth the trip. Best view in Hong Kong, right?'

- AAAAAA I LOVE THIS I LOVE MEN OML

- Y'all are sitting on a picnic blanket, just holding each other as the sun goes down

- You guys are so cute omg

- Anyway, you definitely stay and watch the starts too

- Y'all be stargazing, lying in each others arms

- Wei definitely felt something then

- Like... not the usual 'they're cool I think I want them'

- He felt like 'omg I love them I want to stay like this please'

- It's quite late when you leave bc ig you lost all sense of time???

- (Same tbh I do this even if I'm not in some muscular guys arms)

- 'Aw shit, I didn't realise it was that late already. Should we go?'

- That last phrase was a question bc honestly, he didn't want to leave

- Okay okay but before y'all parted ways (he'd walk you home or something btw dw) he'd definitely ask you for another date

- 'So, how about this time next week then? If you're free, that is.'

- Eeee y'all are so cute

- Anyways, eventually you guys become partners and everything is great bc yessss

- Whether this is when he's a a triad member/red pole or a policeman, he still gets quite protective of you bc ofc

- Like, when he's a triad member, people don't like him

- When he's a red pole, people REALLY don't like him

- And when he reveals himself as a cop? ALOTTA PEOPLE REALLY REALLY DON'T LIKE HIM-

- This means people might go for you bc they know he likes you

- But then again, do they really wanna go against The Wei Shen??? It's Wei Shen dude, do you really wanna mess with him???

- Still, he worries. He definitely tries to keep an eye on you, or make sure you text him immediately if anything happens

- 'Text me alright? If anything happens, just call me.'

- He's just a little guy

- Okay he's not little

- He's just a protective guy

- He love you ok leave him be

Jackie

- MY BLORBO OMG ILY

- (The 'ily' can be portrayed as platonic or romantic tbh I just love him)

- He's just a little guy ok

- Anyway, I think he'd start kind of flirting with you bc he does that with everyone he meets that he's mildly attracted to???

- But once you guys actually hang out, he realises he actually likes you alot tbh

- I think it's either how nice you are to him or your laugh/smile

- He gets butterflies thinking about you :)

- That's why he stops flirting with the others, bc he kind of just wants you?

- You always play his flirting as just part of his personality rather than him actually being interested in you

- Which makes it a bit more difficult for him bc now he doesn't really know how to show you he actually wants to date you

- He definitely asks Wei about it when they're just hanging out

- 'You know that good-looking (hair colour), (Y/n)? Uh yeah, that one. I uh... I kind of really like them, but I don't really know how to.... ask them out. They always play off my flirts as a joke or something! I don't know what to do man, I really like them!'

- Wei suggested he just straight up tell you his intentions rather than hint at it

- That did make him a little nervous bc while he doesn't usually beat around the bush, he doesn't want you to like... make fun of him or something

- But eventually Wei convinced him that even if you rejected him, you wouldn't bully him or something

- So one day you two are in the car with Wei (he's driving) and he just gives Jackie a look

- 'Oh! Right... hey, (Y/n)? So uh... do you wanna... go on a date sometime?'

- '....sure.'

- VSHSBJSJAN LET'S GOOOOOOO

- Wei and Jackie share a look like '>:]' bc ofc

- I think he would try do something really fancy??? But then panic bc he can't afford it

- Yes, he texted Wei about it

- Yes, Wei threatened the owners to let you two go in if they saw you

- (Thanks Wei, you a real one fr)

- Anyway, he got you a bouquet as well bc UGH HE'S JUST SO NICE

- It ends up the fancy stuff didn't really fill you up, nor was it that worth so

- (Luckily you guys ended up not paying as much as usual bc of Wei)

- He feels kinda bad bc it wasn't really that good

- But it ends up going pretty good bc you end up getting ice cream and just go on a walk under the stars :)

- You guys end up sitting on some stairs, holding ice cream and stuff

- HE EVEN GAINS THE COURAGE TO PUT HIS ARM AROUND YOU YAY

- OK ok anyway after you two become official, I think he gets much more comfortable around you bc he knows you like him back

- PDA bc yes

- And when the whole... buried alive stuff happens, he kind of... clings to you

- He's much more emotional around you and hugs you tight whenever, especially when you're both sleeping together (not in the sexual way)

- He has nightmares often, and feels really bad when you wake up/stay up with him

- 'Man... I- I'm sorry (Y/n)... I don't know... I don't know what to do.... I'm scared, (Y/n).'

- He does these nightly confessions often tbh... he feels so guilty in the morning though

- He's just... he's just a lovely guy please protect him

Winston

- I'm ngl I think Winston will not beat around the bush

- At least, not for long

- When he first meets you, he thinks your cool

- He eventually gravitates towards you bc of how nice you are to him

- Like, he literally kills people everyday and here you are just going ':) hi'

- Like okay why don't you just kiss me already (probably Winston's thoughts)

- In the week where he decides to try date you, the others kind of tease him lol

- More specifically behind his back (even more specifically Conroy, Wei and Jackie)

- If he finds out they're dead 💀

- Anyway, one day he just calls you and asks bc yes :)

- 'Hey, (Y/n)? I was wondering if you wanted to go out?'

- 'Sure, looking forward to it!'

- 'Yeah? Alright, good. I'll pick you up.'

- He's happy :) yay dating time

- I feel like maybe you'd just do something chill??

- Idk like if you guys are already good friends you'd probably just chill somewhere like a restaurant like the Golden Koi

- Winston doesn't want you to meet his mom straight away bc uhhhh

- 'Eat more lah, you get so skinny ah...' (Mrs. Chu with literally anyone even if you're healthy)

- If you guys didn't know each other that well, he'd probably take you to a different restaurant??? Maybe BamBam???? idk man

- Yes he might feel a little nervous bc uhhh idk he's just babygirl he gets like that sometimes with pretty people

- He'd probably have to leave early bc you know.... he's a red pole he kinda has work all the time

- 'Now?! I have to go now!? I'm busy with- But- You- Ugh... fine! Fine, I'm leaving now.... fuck.'

- He looks at you and feels rlly bad bc :'( we were on a date

- 'I... uh, sorry, (Y/n). Work.'

- 'Ah, it's okay, I had fun with you anyway :)'

- He had fun while he was with you though, but he might be mad at whoever called him though bc yes

- Okay after y'all became official, he probably just let's you meet the others too

- Most of the time you'll be chilling at Golden Koi (Mrs. Chu approves of your existence now congrats)

- He likes this bc when he's finished with work he can come back to have good food, see his mom and you!!

- Life is preeeetty good for him

- And yes, when he comes back he picks you up/hugs you :)

- Yay hugs with babygirl

- He may be really soft with you, but as soon as someone teases him he just gives a death glare to the person

- He also likes you staying at the Golden Koi alot cuz then he knows where you are = easier to protect you

- OH also unrelated but he gets kinda jealous quick so uh

- Just kith the man and tell him your his

- Okay that sounds a bit possessive of him damn

- Dw, if he goes too far just tell his mom she'll beat his goofy ahh (not actually.... okay maybe....)

- 'OW- Hey- Ma I- OW- Okay!! I'm sorry!' (live footage of Winston being beaten up by his mom with a spoon or something)

- He definitely does get possessive actually... he's working on it (not)

- Like not in a horrible way ig? But if ur not into that just tell him or something ok

- He won't be mad, he almost never gets mad at you (I know, shocking given his usual demeanour)

- I think he's quite soft with you bc... well he can't be mad all the time

- Overall, I think he's pretty nice to you :)

[bumblevoid]

i’ve decided to ramble a bit about an old fnaf au of mine in the hopes it’ll get me to remember it enough to write it ahaha

okok so it’s called Live or Laugh, and it’s a good ol’ michael posses lolbit au. i’ve seen a lot more of those popping up lately (for example i am currently binge reading laughing at tragedy (so good highly recommend i’m in ch. 6 so far)). thought i’d go ahead and go back to mine to get back into writing fnaf lol-

we’re going to ignore that i made this au (and most of them tbh) to be funky for my weird little multiverse things i write

so basically,, it is 1986. michael is sixteen, and lives with henry after he ran away from william about a week after elizabeth’s death. he gets a weird letter from will on his birthday, blah blah he’s doing sl. that’s what’s happening. this set-up is important. and like,, night four of sl is absolutely atrocious and i literally hacked the game to skip it because no. it’s really hard and if you’ve beat it please give me tips i wanna play night five and the custom nights legitimately but uH mike dies on night four for aforementioned reasons. he dies inside the springlock suit.

now if we ever got clarification on what that suit actually looks like or anything i haven’t seen it and am kindly ignoring it. but uh mike is dead and ends up in a springtrap like situation. he’s a dead dude stuck in the suit that killed him where his corpse still is.

oh yeah the suit is lolbit in this au. i coulda made him anything but yk i had an obsession with lolbit when i made this (stares at lolbit art print that lives on my desk).

henry reports mike as missing the next day, very concerned as a man who is taking care of a child that isn’t even his should be. and then william also goes missing, and he’s just. there. the next year, he decides to work as a night guard at his own restaurant under a fake name so he can see what all the rumors about the night shift are about. he works under the fake name fritz smith for six nights and one day. yeah i swapped jeremy and fritz’s worktime for this,, dw jeremy’s still important but on that day henry uh. becomes the bite of 87 victim in LoL and yk i’m learning a lot about writing brain damage incorrectly through playing jeremy in my motw campaign lol from here henry goes on to investigate the ghosts and pretty much just steals all of mike’s night guard roles.

and uh phone dude finds mike in like. a scrap heap that all the old sl stuff got thrown in after so many years. so lolbit just, shows up at fazbear’s fright on night 3 and henry’s just freaking out because “THERE’S ANOTHER???” and “OH MY GOD THAT’S WILLIAM HE WANTS TO KILL ME-”

yeah i still haven’t thought up how exactly they’re gonna reconnect i’ve got like,, three different scenarios running in my brain ahaha

so that’s like, the set-up of this au.

every time i sit down to write it i can’t decide if i want to start from fnaf 2 or fnaf 3. like the scene that my brain imagined that brought this whole au is in pizzeria sim so 3 would get me there faster, but also it’d be fun to write out henry being like “oh. oh my robots are haunted and want to murder me what is happeninG” so.

and then i’m like. do i write just henry’s pov or like. throw mike in there sometimes for flavor

[reserved-system]

WOAH!! HEY GUYS I JUST READ YALLS JON IN HERMITCRAFT FIC AND LIKE !!!!!! WOAHEOAHWOAH!!!! VERY COOL!!!!

i havent even listened to magnus archives yet [its literally the next podcast im planning to listen to dw] but i am obsessed with this fic. its actually so cute despite the poor guy being in distress most of the time.

i will now theorise and talk about ur fic in ur ask box if thats ok sjdbhdhdhhedjbdjdb

🤔🤔 i wonder why jon was put for a day instead of respawning immidiately? maybe the server was struggling to connect him for the first time or somethin? or xisuma was tryin to block him or somethin? idk, itd be funny if it was The Universe forcing him to get some sleep for once. actually yea i hope thats it.

itll be very funny [or angsty depending on how yall spin it] to see jon realise that death is a consequence-less action in this world, either he watches someone die or dies himself. bros in shock like,,,, my brother in christ i just witness a death 😱😨😱☹️😟😱, but then the person rematerialises in a nearby bed like,,, a second later like,,,, oopsie daisies 😅😅 just got pranked and exploded along side my house 😝😝 mustve been that pesky bird 🤭🤭🤭 I'll be back, just have to collect my stuff 😮‍💨😮‍💨 and jons sitting there like (,,#ﾟДﾟ)

BAHAHAHA if jon was shocked at the ears and tail on ren then i cannot wait to see his reaction to doc adfsfjakggkagkkgaakgagakg

*clapping!!* Cub!! my favourite basement dweller!!

Omg i didnt even Think of how people casually talking about mining for supplies would sound!! very thoughtful on yalls part :D

Woooo!!! map mechanics!!!!

also!!! cub saying that jon would make it to Tangos by sun set IF he doesnt get lost feels like,,,,, foreshadowing,,,, where jon gets lost and has to deal with zombies and skeletons and spiders™️ 👀👀👀 bro will not survive the night sjdbjdbdhdhd

lmao no pressure to answer this but just know that i very much enjoyed the reading !!

WAAAHHHH JBSDJGBJDG Hi! I'm sorry, we were not expecting to wake up to anything this morning. We are extremely flattered!! We're going to try to talk/answer any of your questions or theories without spoiling anything we have planned but firstly! You should definitely listen to The Magnus Archives it's such a good podcast. You don't have to worry about our fic containing spoilers for any of the events in the podcast (to my knowledge, at least. Anyone is free to correct me).

____ 1) Our main reason for having him wait a day before respawning was so THIS MAN COULD SLEEP. This man hasn't had a proper 8 hours of sleep in weeks at this point and needed the rest. The Universe spoke and said he needs to sleep.

2) We're actually going to start to explore people dying in the next chapter and we are VERY very exciting to start on that. What I think will be funny even going forward is seeing how terrified Jon is of seeing people die verse how laid back the hermits are about it. Cause realistically this is what, their ninth season so I'd say they're pretty desensitized to it.

3) I think about his reaction to Doc a lot cuz here comes this shirtless creeper goat cyborg with crocs. IT'S JUST TOO PERFECT. We haven't pin pointed when we're going to introduce the two but when we do it's going to be so much fun to write.

4) Cub <3 <3 <3 So far Cub has been our favorite hermit to write cuz he's just so chill. He could say the most out there sentence and you'll be looking at him and he's just got a blank expression. You'll look at him like did you not just hear what came out of your mouth and he'll look like he's said nothing wrong. Love his guy

5) It's just a few things we think about the difference between hermits and non hermits. For hermits mining for resources is an (at least) a once a week things. Non hermits haven't needed to mine for resources by hand since what, since heavy machinery was introduced on the scene. So it's not something they think about unless their job is to mine for those resources / work those heavy machines.

6) I wouldn't say it's foreshadowing but mainly a light jab at Jon cuz maybe he looks like the kind of guy who you'd give him simply directions and he still gets lost.

(We are those people. Driving downtown is confusing even with a gps)

But yes, maybe Jon does have an encounter with some mobs later on. Who's to say? Hehe.

Anyways, I'm super glad that you've been enjoying our fic so far! Super exciting to get back to writing it more often now that we have a lot more free time.

Hope you have a good rest of your day/evening <3

-Xavier

[eightwholebreads]

doccy who thoughts

This series was basically fine so long as yo don't actually think about any of it. Moment to moment is fine but overall its like well okay what was all that even about. After the specials it ws very clear that this just wasn't going to be a good jumping on point for people. (idk maybe it is but idk because I've seen most of nuwho and that can't be undone). I do feel like if series 1 was written by RTD as a fan wanting to write for people his age and maybe younger then this series was written for their kids. Personally I'm not that fussed about the optimistic and energetic tone but whatever I can sit with it for 45 minutes a week fair enough.

This was a really weird series too. Of the 7 stories, the doctor more or less wasn't in 2 of them and completely immobilised in one AND those episodes were 3 in a row.

Episode opinions summary

Space babies: cringe. Didn't enjoy it. When they weren't doing the basic plot they were speedrunning dw lore. There was a couple of good ideas in there but I didn't enjoy it

Devil's chord: Okay. And probably not much better than okay. Maestro was alot of fun but the actual plot was kind of eh. The musical number at the end was fine and whatever. I didn't enjoy it but I'm sure someone out there did.

Boom: Good. I was wondering how moffat would trap ruby in a b plot and then she spent most of the episode unconscious

73 yards: Interesting but didn't do it for me at all. Whatever

Dot and bubble: The slug thing actually scared me a bit like imagine walking into something you're not even aware of augh. I'm sort of going back and forth on whether the racism twist was actually good or not. I watched josh must win by coincidence shortly before this episode and you could feel maybe similar thought processes in that show where several of the other contestants were saying stuff like Oh he just needs to try more and I don't think he's comfortable here so I hope he gets voted out. Like the thought processes sort of look similar from the outside where you can't see the underpinning mechanism and its one people can fall into from various different angles so when the underpinning mechanism turned out to just be space racists it was like oh so now we don't have to think about our own possible behaviour because they're doing it about this one specific and unacceptable thing. On the other hand it is made for all ages and keeping it simple means you're less likely to lose people and the final scene was pretty good. Basically most of my criticism boils down to "ah this episode didn't do what I thought it would" so whatever.

Rouge: Oh boy I sure hope the doctor and rouge flirting doesn't take up the whole episode. Romance isn't my thing but I can appreciate it as a little side dish to a decent episode... and then the romance takes up the whole episode

The legend of ruby sunday: setup. The time window scene was neat. Literally don't understand why classic fans were all Oh maybe the nuwho only peeps won't understand sutekh. Yeah they make it super clear he's the (probably egyptian) god of death. Easy to understand

Empire of death: Eh. The payoffs didn't really work. The solutions were cheap and based on lying to the audience. The final few scenes really worked. I don't particularly care for the drama stuff but they worked.

Excited for christmas? No not really but I'll still watch it and the next series. Not as actively irritating as the moffat era, not as crushingly dull as the chibnall era.

[physicsphddiary]

Update because I suck

Why haven't I written anything? IDK. I want to start doing this again so I will try once more. I've started organising my research notes into weekly journals rather than daily (Obsidian is so good); I will try to summarise the week every Friday.

Today I will just provide an update to things.

Research is going okay. I think right now I've got enough to write a paper. Above is a video of the fronts (it's very high-resolution). I think I've explained what it's showing before, the black lines are the temperature contours, the blue and orange lines are the stream-function, they show the flow direction (and distance between the lines show flow speed) in the z-x plane. The heatmap is the vertical vorticity, for an average here that's just the change in the x direction of the along front (y direction) flow.

A shitty edit in paint of a diagram from Nature just to show the directions. The video is an average over the y direction of an "ideal" filament. We are interested in the mechanisms by which the filament evolves, particularly what the evolution of the horizontal gradient of temperature that defines it looks like. It's important for the resulting vertical transport of heat, momentum and chemicals, etc. The ocean components of full climate models (i.e. the whole Earth) are reaching horizontal resolutions of about 10km (largely thanks to the GPU), which is the typical size of these structures, so they represent the "biggest thing that the models can't model" and good parametrisations for them are important.

I will explain more in my update tomorrow, but I think I've reached the end of this line of attack that I'm doing right now, and hopefully can put together a draft paper before the year ends. Next I want to work on more realistic simulations than the kind of ideal stuff that I do.

I'm going to a conference in February, presenting a poster. It's exciting but I'm very nervous of course.

For me myself life is going well I think. I've got a new bike because the old one was a bit temporary. I still have it and keep it in my office, perhaps for emergencies. I got some kind of award recently. A whole $5k. Was pretty nice. I saved most of it but I just bought a new Surface Pro because mine was from 2017 and was the cheapest model. It was nice just to splurge on a computer I've never done that.

Unfortunately I had to also buy a new phone recently because mine (also from 2017, a release OnePlus 3t) kicked it. I got a Pixel 6a. I was very happy but then Black Friday happened and it became $200 off (I paid $500) so I feel bad lol.

I had some BANGING sushi last week. I went the first time because it was a free meal due to a department thing, and then immediately changed plans with someone to go to the restaurant instead two days later; we were gonna get sushi, but at a cheaper place (dw I paid). It was sooo good yum. First time I went I got a roll (and loads of takoyaki and alcohol because it was free), but with the friend we each got this special nigiri set. HOW do they do it. Like you know it's just raw salmon or whatever but it just tastes so good. Power of freshness I guess.

I'm going back to the UK over Christmas. I'm excited. I didn't go last year so it's been 1 year 3 months and 7 days since I last had a Greggs sausage roll (shocking). I bought some bottles on Aliexpress and hopefully they get here on time, I want to fill them with maple syrup and give them out to people I see. I'm staying in London for a day to see some friends then going home. It's going to be the unhealthiest two weeks of my life I'm gonna eat and drink so much. I really miss making cocktails. I can't really do it here because I just can't justify buying all the stuff, I never have friends over and my roommate doesn't drink. Looking forward to seeing my uni friends again, it's been a long time.

Cassi