#don't worry!! i can talk about Andres for hours lol

[blorbosexterminator]

i agree with you on a lot from the last ask about andres's feelings, I guess i have the impression that - i can't quite put into words and i know I'm gonna sound contradictory - andres was aware that his feelings for martin weren't really brotherly or just friendly and obviously also different from what he felt for his wives. but also i don't think he ever really acknowledged that, privately in his own mind, ever confronted that. like i do think he was in denial and refusing to face his feelings and his relationship with martin like that, but i don't think he was totally oblivious, completely unaware as to how he felt. im not sure i make sense, I don't know how exactly to get across what I'm thinking. and I'm also thinking wayyy too much about them lol. it's probably partly my own wishful thinking/headcanoning, bc I really dislike the interpretations of this unrequited love, gay guy tragically in love with the oblivious straight man thing, oh they're just platonically humping while spraying each other with champagne. it's a more satisfying interpretation to me personally if andres feels that he, well, feels differently but still can't really make himself do anything about it, rather than just honestly having no idea. sorry for the long ass ask.

Sorry for being a bit late. I understand you perfectly, the same thing has plagued my mind for a pretty long time. Especially if we take intentions and subtext into the matter, from day 1 Pedro Alonso and Rodrigo de la Serna didn't play the characters as 'one guy is in love while the other is straight and oblivious' so I don't think it's just your wishful thinking. And I'm very much with you on this, I dislike it just the same, never mind that it doesn't actually make much sense. But Andrés remains a difficult character to grasp; he's very paradoxical and unconventional, but he's also king at repressing his true feelings (ex: his illness) and only acknowledging what he wants to see. I think Andrés was always aware of his feelings, that they weren't brotherly or friendly (I've never told you this but I've never felt for any of them ... ) but he 1) refused to acknowledge them 2) made the deliberate choice not to act on them, to never tell Martín. The concept that he had zero idea honestly makes zero sense to me, Andrés and Martín didn't treat each other platonically, Andrés didn't treat Martín platonically. In every single scene we have of them together or of Andrés talking about Martín, he acted like he was in love with him (ex: Speaking of love, look at him, Martín, my bestfriend, what a legend... ) this isn't two men platonically spending their nights humping each other, this is them being 99% a couple. Andrés knew Martín loved him, he knew he loved Martín, and he knew that only if he allowed it, Martín would close that one left gap (as he did in 4x08). I personally think it's the definitivity of his death that made Andrés allow himself to act on it for once. Was he afraid of it for the past ten years? I think so, was Andrés most probably not only scared of being with a man but also of being in such a relationship with that magnitude, with this level of love and commitment? I think so.

Bottomline is, I think it's out of the question that Andrés was wholly, completely, oblivious to how he felt. Only resistant, in denial a bit, delusional in what he wants to see, etc. I don't think that was ever the intention behind berlermo generally speaking, that it was only ever unrequited and the other guy was oblivious. Even when Nairobi, who knew somehow, talked to Martín, she was criticising him never doing anything about his feelings, and I think the same could be said for Andrés. For ten years, both allowed the status quo, each terrified to do anything about it. Until something as final and as terrible as Andrés' illness and definite death came into the picture and forced him to do something