#don't touch the manager
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Phantomish Rogues
Team Phantom get ripped from their home universe into the DCverse. With no money or real ID's in this world. Now thats a problem.
Another big problem is that Danny is badly injured and his core kinda put him into a deep cryo sleep. He needs to rest and gather ectoplasm.
Bigger problem Team Phantom have no clue how to get home because they don't know how to decode the Fenton Portal blue-prints, not even Jazz who at the time didn't pay attention to her parents portal work anymore by the time they finished it. The only one who does have an idea is Danny!
Biggest problem, they landed in a place called Gotham that seems to be overrun with actual villains and heroes? (vigilantes). And for some odd reason many of them seem to find them no matter where the Team goes to hide.
Until they can get their hands on a safe space, tech, and money, Team Phantom might have to go a bit Rogue/Villainous if they wanna keep Danny safe until he wakes up.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#crossover#dp x dc#blue rambles#danny phantom dc#writing ideas#random idea#dpxdc#Team Phantom might have to go Rogue#they don't wanna but they need cash and a safe area#Danny's powers/aura is a bit like catnip to Gothamites because lets face it#that city is cursed and death touched#thats why they keep getting found#Team Phantom is trying to lay low but again they need money and someplace to put Danny to keep him safe#Sam totally wants to join Ivy though#when she finds out about her#Tucker gets into a tech war with Oracle and Red Robin once he gets his hands on some stuff#Jazz beats up Joker when the clown finds their current hideout and is getting to close to her sleeping/healing brother#with a crowbar#that Jason saw and is now swooning#hinted Anger Management#Dani decides she adores Catwoman when she see's how she works#and decides teasing a Bat(Robin) is what she's gonna do now#Dani loves Spoiler too#they both totally get into a glitter war#Danny is getting his sleep in now at least. ZzZzZz
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so emo over them set to iris by the goo goo dolls that i just had to colour this
#cal be like ''i'd give up forever to touch you''....#nova be like ''you're the closest to heaven that i'll ever be''....#nova be like ''i don't wanna go home right now''......#cal be like ''i just don't don't wanna miss you tonight''.......#agh#and then the chorus is like:#''and i don't want the world to see me'' / ''cause i don't think that they'd understand ''#''when everything's made to be broken'' / ''i just want you to know who i am''#that'd be nova when he first arrives in mistria; highly socially anxious to the point of being distant and downright unapproachable#but he manages to become comfortable in this new place thanks to caldarus's encouragements#caldarus watches nova blossom; sees him find his place in town and make friends w his fellow townsfolk#sees him become unafraid to express himself; admires his various outfits#then the chorus would be caldarus when he takes his humanoid form#he's a secret only nova knows about#grappling with a lot of confusing feelings for his closest companion#a simple helper turned friend to dear friend to the one he pines after; while having no clue what he's feeling#ack. my heart#my art#doodles/sketches/wips#artists on tumblr#fields of mistria spoilers#fields of mistria#fields of mistria caldarus#fom caldarus#caldarus x farmer#nova dragonsworn#can't believe it took til drawing 3 to draw the tail. i think it's very cool#that's another thing: spiky tail; sharp nails; towering stature#a creature that could easily be dangerous; only wanting to treat the farmer with the utmost gentleness. melting
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sellllllll it's meeeeee. hehehehehehehehehhehe
so for ur writing exercises.... deku + light? please? pretty please?
:3c
heheh heheh hehe niku. this will be the death of me. me writing izuku for the first time 🥲 i will only do this for you </3
contains: established relationship, spoilers for the end of the manga, aged up deku but sometime in between the final outcome (he doesn't get the h*** s*** from bakugo yet), mentions of sex and scars
deku + light
izuku only sleeps with the lights off.
it isn't uncommon; many people you know can't sleep with even just a sliver of light turned on somewhere in the room. but the difference with izuku, you learn, is not that he's unable to stand the light―it's that he refuses to.
you quickly pick up on it the first few times he sleeps over.
he fidgets in bed, pretty badly, actually. the nightlight you sleep with glows a warm yellow, illuminating the side of your face and coating him in its afterglow. you chalk it up to nerves, how he pulls at his sleeves and adjusts his position constantly; he is, after all, one of the most anxious people you know.
and this relationship―it's new. heck, even you feel a little jittery with his arm wrapped around you.
the rhythmic tapping on your hip only increases pace. you don't think he realizes it, so your hand gently reaches for his, intertwining your fingers as you turn around in his arms.
he's close, nearly touching you nose-to-nose; the proximity leaves you fuzzy, a little ticklish, so you giggle, a soft "oops," as the freckles dusting his face almost glisten under the warm light.
"hi," you whisper, meeting his eyes; they stare back at you wide in surprise, "can't sleep?"
he looks almost guilty at your question, as if you’ve caught him with the one thing he's been trying to keep from you.
"just—" his voice comes out louder than intended, prompting him to chuckle nervously as he readjusts his volume, "just winding down, sorry."
you inch closer, nuzzling his nose lightly, "it's okay."
"did i wake you?" he asks, cheeks flushing pink as his eyebrows furrow in immediate concern. his expression is something caught between stifling a grin and feeling sorry.
you shake your head against the pillow you share, strands of your hair tangling with his. "just winding down," you tease, watching as his gaze turns softer, eyelids drooping heavier.
sometimes, you think, izuku holds the world in his eyes―a deep, dark green, the color of life. most times, they look at you with wonderment, bright and alive; photos from inko tell you they're the eyes of his inner child.
on nights like this one, however, they hide a depth in them weighted by what you can only assume is time, and all that has happened to him in such a short span of it.
you try your best to understand what lies beneath them, knowing full well he'll never tell you outright what truly bothers him.
"is it the light?" you bring up, some time after laying in silence.
"hm?" he clarifies.
"do you have a hard time sleeping with the nightlight?"
his eyes widen briefly once more, as if shocked that you've caught him again. these split second reactions are ones you've learned to be attentive to when it comes to izuku.
"no," he tries to lie, but you know better as you turn to your nightstand and reach for its switch, "you don't–"
"it was hurting my eyes," you quickly make up an excuse, tucking yourself closer under his chin as you cut off his attempt to deny it again.
finding out that the light was the problem was the easy part—
you'd begun to notice much earlier on that izuku was barely rested on the nights he'd spend at your place. it was only when your old nightlight broke that you began to notice him waking up much later than you did, groggily rousing from a deep sleep.
—what was hard, was figuring out why.
at first, you suspected it was his scars.
"s-sorry, it's not—" he'd warned you, right as your hands gripped the hem of his shirt the first time you were about to have sex, "—it's not nice."
you didn't care though; you still don't care, and you've made that abundantly clear to him since. you love izuku and all his parts―all the nicks and jaggedy pieces of skin that make up who he is.
when you eventually ask him about it, with a request that he be honest with you for once, he tells you that it is and it isn't―the reason why he exclusively sleeps with the lights off, that is.
it's an odd, comforting relationship he has with his body—that he is simultaneously grateful and sorry for how its become a canvas, both painted and marred to symbolize japan’s historic last stand.
you find out the real reason when you catch him staring at his hands.
he does it often, when he thinks you aren't looking—his fists bunched up in the same way he used to watch the power of one for all course through his fingertips; the same way he used to prepare them in battle.
there’s a faraway look in his eyes that lingers, you notice—a little wistful if anything.
“do you miss it?” you finally ask. he gives you the same shocked look he does every time, as if he’s been caught with a secret he’s been trying to hide.
he’s learned a fair bit about you now, too, though—lying to you is futile when you’ve perfected reading his truth. he stares at his fists again as you take a seat beside him, moving to give you space. you rest your head on his shoulder gently, waiting.
“sometimes,” he admits, but you know it’s an understatement.
“i think about the vestiges a lot. i miss them the most, i think,” he continues, clenching his fists tightly, “i always try to reach out to them, but i guess it doesn’t work that way.”
“i… i try to replicate the right conditions every night, but…” then he lets go, stretching his fingers out wide. the scars on the surface ripple through his skin, telling its own story.
you hum, acknowledging what he means. silence sits with the two of you as you take his hand in yours, slowly unfurling his fingers until his palm reveals itself to you. it’s rough to the touch, seasoned with hard work and all that he’s been through.
“is that why you prefer the dark?” you ask softly, after some time.
it's not often that you stay up later than izuku does. when you do though, you catch him shifting in bed, moving from side-to-side. you pretend you aren't awake, but you hear him mumble their names, dwindling in volume as he dozes off to sleep.
he stares at his palm for a moment before he admits quietly, "yeah." his brows furrow as if contemplating whether to say more, but he shakes his head, dark green strands swaying to the beat of his embarrassed chuckle, "nevermind, it's silly."
"it's not."
you intertwine your fingers, sandwiching his hand between yours. a slight sheen glosses over his eyes as he tilts his head up to look at you. he draws in a breath, before it spills over.
"it's..." he finds the words, and you squeeze his hand in comfort, "it's easier to believe it was all real when the lights are out, and that maybe it can happen again."
#deku x reader#izuku x reader#midoriya x reader#bnha x reader#shotorus.workbook#it is here ! the first time ive ever written izuku ! i hope u like it niku !#idt i'll ever feel like anything i write of him will be enough but i tried !#SPOILERS FOR MANGA ENDING PLS DONT READ AHEAD#some stuff abt the blurb: i see this happening in the time between him losing ofa and before getting the suit from bakugo#so somewhere between when hes teaching#and i think its a lot of complex feelings ― he's happy he did what he had to do but is also mourning the loss of something he once had#i don't think i can ever convey that feeling fully but i hope i at least managed to touch on it here with him !#i see this as like . the period in his life where he's transitioning out of something he once knew into smth else entirely#i also hc reader to be his colleague (like a teacher or smth) but anyone closely related to the job would work !#really just someone who has a base level understanding of what he went through but doesnt know everything#which is why they're still trying to learn all these things abt him and read him better#and also why he tries to hide a lot of things from them still / is hesitant to share in fear of scaring them away smth like that !#thats all i can think of for now but ill let u know if i have other thoughts on this later on ! hehe#hope u enjoy niku !#ask#rep#ask game answered#most nervewracking experience of my LIFE writing him#stellamancer#niku.🥩
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Was Itachi's forehead poke to Sasuke a sign of distancing himself and not wanting Sasuke to get involved, rather than just a mere sign of affection? I saw a few people talk about that and how it's weird that Sasuke does that to his family considering the original meaning.
yes, you've got an accurate handle on the original meaning of the Forehead Poke. fundamentally it is an expression of distance that itachi wields at times when he cannot be with sasuke. and it seems to be a throughline of his childhood: sasuke asks itachi to do something as mundane as train together but itachi continually refuses on account of his duties as a shinobi.
it is not a gesture devoid of love -- it's not as though itachi ever delights in dismissing sasuke (on the contrary, he is always regretful). but there's a cruelty in the uncertainty of it all: the most direct translation is "maybe next time", so itachi fails to provide even an assurance that they can, like, hang out next week or something. this chasm between them is then widened by itachi promising, on the night of the massacre, that he might allow a final battle between them if sasuke ever proves competent enough to bother fighting, leaving sasuke in protracted pursuit of the looming specter of his older brother.
this distance is really only bridged (barely) in their final scene when itachi lays bare the truth of his motives, his regrets (which are lacking, to put it mildly, but for sasuke this is nonetheless momentous), and his unconditional pride in and love for his little brother. the Forehead Poke is notably absent here because textually, the enforced distance wrt sasuke is framed as itachi's greatest wrong. (seriously, itachi says something to the effect of: i shouldn't have done All That because maybe you, my 7-year-old brother, could have brought change to our clan... thereby reducing inconvenience for konoha, of course. the paucity of virtue in massacring the uchiha doesn't really register for him even during this reconciliation, and it's deliberate... because the author doesn't see it as much of an issue either!)
anyway, it might seem odd for sasuke to repeat this gesture with sakura in chapter 699, then, particularly because it seems to be invoked in a manner identical to itachi in his neglect. kind of an odd way to signify a happy ending for these characters, right...?
well, it works for me solely because it is not identical! and naruto's english dub is my worst enemy. i would grab a couple of manga panel screenshots in the original japanese to prove it, but it's easier for me to just plug these scenes from the anime. here is an itachi Forehead Poke (0:51) and here is sakura seeing sasuke off at the konoha gate (0:33). there's a subtle but meaningful distinction in the phrasing: "mata kondo da" vs. "mata kondo na". which, in effect, alter the meaning from "maybe next time" to:
(there's an excellent tumblr post from years ago which performs a substantive analysis of the japanese in both contexts, but eludes me now. pls send if any of you have a link to it!)
so personally i adore its inclusion in chapter 699 specifically. it obviously carries a great deal of weight for sasuke and it's meaningful he chooses to express it to sakura specifically despite leaving the entire team behind -- in lots of ways, and more than any other character, i think for sasuke, sakura is the anti-itachi. (that would require another post to elucidate.) so not only is it an expression of regret at unintended distance, but, more crucially, it's a promise of return. i think it's incredibly sweet that sasuke can repurpose the gesture from something soul-rending to something hopeful.
(also deserving of another post lol but this scene also achieves a neat and, crucially, subversive callback to sakura's foundational insecurities... it's like poetry it rhymes)
all that said, i understand why it reads as something different once we are then given the context of chapter 700 and gaiden... i dislike both of these installments, primarily for the implication that distance becomes a love language, so to speak, between sasuke and sakura/sarada. these relationships are ruled by distance and sasuke accepts it. it's disappointing! his journey to learn about more of the world in chapter 699 jibed with the character's arc until that point. this does not.
my unpopular take is i think this has just about nothing to do with sakura or the sasusaku relationship and everything to do with authorial outlook on sasuke's actions in part 2. and for the record, i maintain that these crimes ultimately amount to very little -- violence and death are occupational hazards if one is a shinobi. konoha is also foregrounded by a cold calculus on the worth of human lives; i'm sure sasuke's indispensable role in saving the world outweighs the killing of a few samurai. i just think kishimoto needs sasuke to atone, somehow, forever, via endless service to the village. and he also cannot sensibly write a kakashi- or naruto-headed government that would impose any meaningful punishment, so sasuke is relegated to a state of permanent rootlessness in some dumbass quest. it's a sacrifice on his part, but contrived for a number of reasons, chief among them being that the sasuke we came to know in the original series would literally never internalize konoha's ideals in this manner. so even though the Forehead Poke in gaiden and boruto retains the elements of promise and anticipation of eventual reconciliation, it feels kind of... lame and weightless. there is a superficial signal at growth but materially, for the parties on the receiving end of the Forehead Poke, very little seems to change.
frankly, i think we are meant to view sasuke's love as noble (and sasuke himself as penitent, suggested by the ascetic quality of his life). sasuke is still doing things differently than itachi, insufficient though it may be: he is honest about the reason for his travels, he does not rush to dismiss sarada when she needs emotional support, his motives are selfless rather than selfish (sasuke guards against the threat of the otsutsuki; itachi... wanted sasuke to kill him, in no small part as a desperate ploy to end his own suffering, notwithstanding the subsequent damage that would be inflicted on his thoroughly traumatized little brother). gaiden is surprisingly candid about the distance as a source of distress for sarada, sakura, and even sasuke, but by the end everyone understands why it must be as it is. the state above all! (you'll notice even itachi's apology to sasuke held this precept intact... there is a reason the series closes with sasuke accepting his old hitai-ate.) it is admittedly vexing, considering the totality of evidence here, to see sasuke's nomadic status in boruto pinned on how much he hates his dumb bitch wife and not, you know. the shockingly bad politics underpinning the narrative.
i appreciate the attempts of sasuke enjoyers to explain his distance as natural aversion to konoha, but this isn't canonically backed by any interiority (which seems to be absent in boruto-era team 7 at large) and moreover it requires miscommunication between sasuke and sakura (or even naruto) so great as to be unbelievable. i've accepted that post-pt2 sasuke is an unfortunate victim of kishomoto's nationalist views. his weird takes on how a man like sasuke would behave in a loving relationship and likely desire for a continued revenue stream don't help either. yes i will weep forever...
TLDR: i think the Forehead Poke fits in chapter 699 precisely because it diverges from itachi's. i resent its recurrence suggesting distance from loved ones is an inevitable condition of sasuke's life to which he's stoically acquiescent.
#to expand on sasuke & romance... i've seen people say kishimoto hates ss specifically.because of how he writes minato/kushina for example#well minato is an entirely different guy! and kishimoto is self-professedly weak on the romance front#he has a lot of strengths as a writer but the reversion to tropes and stock archetypes in writing romance is veryyy glaring#sasuke is therefore chronically aloof but also in a mature relationship and it's difficult to believably accomplish both#and of course we have seen sasuke not aloof! we know he's capable! but the romance trope mind virus works in alarming ways#it's also just perceived as way less cool for sasuke to be emotionally expressive towards a woman than a brother(-coded) character#and there's no in-text comparison either. shikamaru is the closest in comportment but he is paired w temari who serves as a tsundere#other than that... i guess there's kakashi (romance aside) but even he deliberately presents as affable#ss in gaiden to me reads less like malicious portrayal & more like. a juvenile take on what sasuke/sakura would be like as grownups#kishi's particularly bad w adult romance because it requires an intimacy i don't think he's entirely comfortable portraying#even in pt 2 ss manages a couple of really authentic touching moments but then as adults i'm like whoooo... are these people....#and above all the entire cast is emotionally and dimensionally neutered in boruto because it sucks. the premise sucks. i don't care for it.#itachi & sasuke#sasusaku#uchiha sasuke#naruto meta#ANYWAYYY thank you for the ask!! it was nice to yap about sasuke & friends again omg i miss them#also sorry this took a week to answer i haven't had much time and wanted to be thorough
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IRON GOLEM AS A SNAILLLL
(im seriously shocked that i locked in and managed to do the whole piece in like an hour and a half)
#minecraft art#iron golem#minecraft#snail#art#my art#mine#i actually managed to finish a project#i usually give up or get distracted and start doing something else and don't touch the first project again for months#idk what else to tag
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Valve just published a blog post regarding plans for the first MVM update in twelve years for TF2 (to be released later this year, sometime after August), and it shaping up to be the first MVM update to involve community submissions (excluding Robotic Boogaloo).
#tf2#im very excited to see what the community comes up with. and i'm excited to see what Valve has in store#regarding if they'll be doing any adjustments to MVM or it's upgrades. and how they plan on handling mann up missions#and what the possible rewards could be. if they're not just for fun anyway (through boot camp)#i'm kinda tempted to rework a layout i made a few years ago for a different tf2 project that didn't end up going as planned#but i feel like i'd need some help on it but wouldn't know who to ask (between folks i know already) and don't want to be a burden#it'd be nice to work on tf2 specific maps again. though this'd be the first time i ever touch anything MVM related#and i'd have to gut and rework parts of the existing layout for it to work better for MVM#like there are 3 main routes from the attackers side. all leading to one main focal point. so i'd love to try and rework it#it was originally created for a different gamemode that utilized Arena's logic. and the layout's fully functional#definitely not complete by the standards for what it was originally trying to achieve. and definitely not in it's current form for MVM#also with valve's mention of being up for the idea of halloween MVM maps.#that makes me wonder if they'll re-tool wave 666 to be part of halloween contracts or not#since it's an MVM map without any rewards and can't be played in Mann Up mode (acting as a free for fun mission)#which ive always found odd. so if they managed to create a contract for it and add some kind of reward. that'd be really fun to see#ofc just wishful thinking.
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me staring at reece shearsmith: a statistical analysis
70%: he pretty :3
30%: trying earnestly to comprehend how young reece and old reece are the same person
#reece shearsmith#treating it like a magic eye puzzle and trusting it'll resolve eventually#maybe i'm a touch faceblind or something but i swear i don't have this problem with anyone else#so chameleonic he even manages to not look like his own younger self#sheece rearsmith
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.
#whatever fleeting moment of “I faked it all. I don't need therapy” I had last week.......... that version of me was a fucking liar dalgfdkjg#I.......... I desperately need life to quit being so fucking Much (TM) all the time because boy oh BOY is this a drag#why do the things I love constantly cycle back around to becoming things that upset me and make me feel bad#why do I keep ruining friendships and connections by not being able to reciprocate or reply or stay in touch#why is one task a day seemingly enough to knock me out for a week#why does every decision I make feel like it's the wrong one#in other news: I have still not managed to fucking call the therapy place#and now I'm stuck in the inertia of feeling bad about it but unable to do it#back on my complaining bullshit what's new#simon.out.#I'm sorry if I ever disappointed you. just know I wish I wasn't like that
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its so funny to me when ppl realize that the founding fathers weren't puritans like guys actually puritanical ideals weren't as prevalent in colonial america as you were led to believe. your elementary school teacher lied to you about history just as much as they lied to you about biology. they were a small religious sect that eventually grew larger as a reactionary movement against social freedoms. most of the founding fathers thought jesus was just some guy. when they said 'under god' they didn't mean The God; they mostly meant 'i mean there's got to be some guy up there doing all this shit right? so we should all probably be good people to make him happy'. john adams said he thought organized religion was stopping us from achieving utopia. there were gay people in colonial america and everyone knew they were gay. the entire country was not massachusetts.
#shut up az#if any of the founding fathers were puritans i don't know about it#not only was jefferson a deist but so was washington#and paine and franklin! so like. several of the big guys did not even believe in jesus really#hamilton (ugh) was an Anglican which became Episcopalian so he might not have even believed in hell#james madison claimed to be anglican as well but privately said he didn't believe in half of it either#john adams my special baby boy was originally a protestant but then decided he didn't believe in jesus and joined unitarianism which is lik#deism but a little more strict about it#anyway. i love when political discourse touches on my special interest#feel free to tell the next chud in a gadsden flag shirt that you know more than him#also tell them that one of john adams's son was gay and had an affair with a general#like Abigail wasn't Thrilled about it really but they didn't throw their sick son out of their house#they took care of him and when he died they politely ignored his partner#which is the bare fucking minimum but somehow republican assholes can't manage even that much
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Do you think Wolfgang could be touch-starved? Given that he lost his mother when he was very young and that his father was likely an a-hole, I doubt he was given any proper affection growing up, let alone during his years in law school.
You're asking me if I believe Wolfgang may be touch starved. You're asking ME if believe Wolfgang may be touch-starved???? YES OF COURSE I DO BELIEVE THAT THANKS FOR ASKING---
Wolfgang, to me, is both touch-starved and touch-aversive. If Wolfgang ever really met his mum (which is still up for debate with the "I really am finally meeting you"), I feel like it was only for a few years and their relationship was very strained. I can't imagine they had a very good relationship in what feels implied to be an abusive household, and also that Wolfmum may have had an aversion to men that possibly extended to Wolfgang especially since he looks like a mini version of her husband. So while Wolfgang very likely craved comfort and affection from her, it's something she was never really able to properly fulfil, which is where the touch-starved part comes in. In comparison, Wolfdad seems like a more likely candidate for Wolfgang's primary (and potentially sole) caretaker, and with what's implied about him yeah he seems like a piece of shit. Wolfgang's traumatised reaction to seeing him while he was hallucinating makes it apparent that he was downright awful to his mum (and likely having murdered her too), but I feel like it also suggests elements of abuse in their own relationship as well (note how Wolfgang started freaking out only after Diana grabbed him to pull him out ☝). And this is where the touch-aversive part comes in.
For me at least, Wolfgang strikes me as the type of guy who would (if necessary/emergency cases) offer hugs to close friends and people he trusts, but is more reluctant about receiving them himself, especially unexpectantly. I do think he yearns for intimacy and affection, but the well has been poisoned to the point where he feels safer keeping a distance and avoiding contact-- another thing he and Grace have in common lol. She is outright confirmed to have faced violence at the hands of men in her industry and also repeatedly resorts to keeping a firm distance and lashing out to protect herself as a result (good example being her sucker-punching Damon immediately and asking questions later and also probably attacking Wolfgang too but choosing to spare him). It's very special to me that they manage to overcome that and felt safe enough around each other to become as close as they were :3
#project eden's garden#p:eg#wolfgang akire#grace madison#wolfgrace#i had to sneak that in here i'm not sorry XD#finally managed to catch up with this one cuz i really liked this ask#asking me if wolfgang may be touch-starved who do you think you're asking??? /silly#while we don't know a shit ton about wolfgang's family the things we can infer and do have already can already be seen in his character#i hit a lot of my favs with the touch starved beam and wolfgang is no exception but i do genuinely believe could be the case with him#thanks for the ask!
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right. i keep thinking about it and chickening out, so, finally: i'm gonna take a break from tumblr for the rest of june.
caveats: cleaning out any tabs i've still got open, answering tag games/asks, and making moodboards
#the caveats let me tackle stuff that either a) i've been avoiding#or b) is actually beneficial for me#but i will not be checking notifications or looking at my dashboard. i Will Not <- saying this out loud to hold myself to it#and if the inbox/ask games end up not being helpful then i'll stop those too#i'm just. i know this isn't a long-term solution but i'm really exhausted and i think#instead of waiting for a solution to appear i need to take a step back first#i love you all very much! you're in my thoughts & my prayers & i'll miss you but i have GOT to find a better way to manage my time on here#and make it a space that is actually Good for my brain instead of leaving me feeling worse or unsettled or upset or something else#idk. i don't know how to find that equilibrium when there are people i Do care about and want to stay in touch with on here#but other things feed into my anxiety/[***]/etc and just make my brain Worse#elle rambles#gonna delete the app from my phone and block the website from my browser until i can sort this all out
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*whines so loudly it startles the neighbourhood's cats*
#HOW COME HE'S BUILT LIKE THAT AND I CAN'T TOUCH HIM????#girlies when i tell you i have never.. and i really do mean NEVER.. wanted to kiss a man this badly before...#i have NEVER craved biting someone like i crave biting him...#he turns me part vamps with the vicious need i have to sink my teeth into his....#kay that sounds deranged but i PROMISE it's literally just [censored h smeggsy word] i SWEAR#like he just makes me feral in a way literally no other man has ever managed before#he's so... delicious shaped.. heavy set.... daddy built....#*bites fist to supress urges*#Kasper Schmeichel#king thicccness#big daddy 😩😩😩#i'd pay HIM for a night alone in a dark room... or a light room.. so i can see him nakey....#i'll give you my kidneys Kasper but i need to feel that body on mine...#PLEASE#CALL IT A HAND-OUT WRITE IT UP AS CHARITY#SOMETHING I DON'T CARE I JUST WANNA GROPE YOU PLEASE#HOW CAN ANYONE BE BUILT LIKE THAT??? SEXYASS BASTARD#*bites fist harder*#me having to be chaste because the tags make posts not visible in HIS tag...#this is pure offense against me and my nature..
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Top 10 anime blorbos
thanks @myndless88 for the tag game putting under keep reading so i don't flood the dashboard and in no particular order because i love them so much
Lavi from D.Gray-man - I haven't been normal about this guy since i was in middle school (i miss my wife so much pls come back to the manga)
Genjo Sanzo from Saiyuki - actuially the whole cast for saiyuki are all my beloved for so many reasons they have been making me cry for years and years but if i had to pick one sanzo is slightly above the rest
Higurashi Kagome from Inuyasha - LOVE HER SO MUCH just HER
Yuuko Ichihara from xxxHolic - my beloved cryptic chaotic gremlin of a witch who is doomed by the narative (is not only in this series but i want to pick someone else from tsubasa reservoir chronicle so im picker her for)
Fai D Fluorite from Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle - what can i say i like them tortured, traumatised and hiding behind a happy go lucky attitude
Sailor Jupiter/Makoto Kino from Sailor Moon - dunno why but i've been down bad for her since i was lil kid ... i love all the sailor moon cast but HER
Portgas D Ace from One Piece - HE WILL FOREVER LIVE IN MY HEART
Mihashi Ren from Ookiku Furikabutte - precious child who i love so much (quite possibly autistic i think maybe). The series is worth watching reading i swear by it till i die
Kyoko Mogami from Skip Beat! - the anime is a lovely comedy? and i love her growth as a character and it's so funny as well
Kusuriuri from Mononoke - i normaly am not a fan of horror but this one is amazing and i love this character so much
UPDATE:oh shit i forgor to tag people uhhhhh @mythicamagic @morikotto , @king-of-bottoms
#tag game#thanks a lot for the tag#i really had to sit down and think because i have forgotten some anime but if im reminded i will go wild talkign baout characters or go cry#i would have added bakugo from bnha but im sitll salty about the manage end don't touch me#i can't beleive i didn't put chuuya from bungou stray dogs but HE IS DEF IN THERE IN MY HEART OK#i think this turned into - put my blorbos from some not so well know anime so i can get people to watch them#there are days where i see my manga shelf and see the re-realease of saiyuki and just ..have ot sit down BECAUSE THOSE 4 IM CAN'T
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The good thing about being a translator by day and a hobbyist artist by night is I get to be angry about genAI 100% of the time.
#i don't particularly want to discuss things but i need to vent in the tags#gameloc companies and their clients were already pushing HARD for MTPE these past few years#(machine translation post edition – I'll let you do your own research but tldr: get humans to proofread machine translation for cheaaap)#but now with genAI it's gotten noticeably worse. and I consider myself to be among the lucky people who still manage to avoid touching it.#the results are still soulless slop. sometimes (often) it doesn't even make any sense. it *is* visibly worse than human translation.#but companies will be like 'enjoy your 90€ AI-translated game I guess'#and most gamers will probably not care lmao#any ounce of creativity and talent is actively being removed from the process and you are being sold a worse product for a higher price#i wish i could *not* care but alas i love my craft and i love video games
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I knew my old place of work treated us like dogshit. I knew England treated minimum wage workers like they're less than human.
But nothing has driven that fact home more than telling my new coworkers about what Tesco was like and having them look at me in absolute horror.
#'oh yeah I made about £800 a month working 40 hour weeks'#*eyebrows raise in horror*#'Yeah our store had 200 employees on the clock daily.'#*Visible fear* '.... we've got.... 2...'#'that was day AND night though. so not all at once'#*blinking* 'It was open 24/7????'#'Sure fucking was!!!'#my manager handing me a pallet jack and going 'I assume you know how to use this'#and I had to tell her i literally wasn't allowed to touch them because 'safety' and i wasn't 'specially trained'#'I have never been on checkouts though so you'll have to explain like i'm 5'#'how have you never been on checkouts???'#'oh I was only ever on dairy'#'YOU WERE ONLY EVER ON DAIRY??? HOW FUCKING BIG WAS THIS STORE?'#Her going 'I'm sorry it was kinda busy on your first shift'#and me thinking back to the maybe 50 customers i had#buddy i have seen HELL and I came back in tatters#I did this shit of hardcore mode for 4 years#this is fun to me compared to fucking TESCO#i miss England in a lot of ways#but man do I not miss the way they treat their people one fucking bit#5 years on and i'm still getting used to being treated like a human being again#that shit has stuck with me#i've been at new job for 3 weeks and still every day before i start i have a tight ball of anxiety in my chest#until i walk in and my body remembers i'm not going back to Tesco#we don't need the stress response anymore#we can relax now#wild
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emma made me viscerally uncomfortable from season 3-6 and the reason is because it was like watching a barbarian multiclass as a cleric. like girl stop with the magical energy blasts!! just hit him with your sword!!! punch him in the face!!!!
#mostly a joke#i managed to tolerate and accept it#in the way midas gets the gold touch and elsa and ingrid get ice powers i wish other magic users had distinguished styles from one another#rather than “uses fire and rips out hearts” “doesn't use fire or rips out hearts” “rumpelstiltskin and whatever the fuck he's got going on”#like from a writing standpoint it makes SENSE that cora regina and zelena all have very similar styles#they were all taught by the same man#and regina was heavily influenced by cora in all that heart stealing#and emma learnt from regina#but come on!! give them some kind of magical signature!!#rumple's was spinning gold#regina's was yeeting fireballs#cora's was pulling hearts#but emma and zelena should have been so much more distinct!! they were both running on instinct like let them have wild magic!!#and no i DON'T count emma and regina straight up blasting opposite coloured lights. that shit is lazy and i won't stand for it#this is why i hate soft magic systems#ouat#once upon a time#emma swan
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