#do you think i can stay to become nothing to queue
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incorrectjaneeyre · 4 months ago
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adele: mr rochester, why do you always call mademoiselle a fairy?
mr rochester: because she's so delicate and beautiful and ethereal and--
jane, not bothering to look up from her book: adele, it's really because i'm short. mr rochester is simply sugarcoating facts with fiction.
mr rochester, slightly indignant: but-- but--
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medicinemane · 8 months ago
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#the answer in life more and more obviously becomes to shut things off more and more#i need to present only my best and most useful side and keep everything else under wraps#this is the truth and it's something i really need to commit to#and it starts with not posting dumb shit on here that says too much#even this frankly says too much#...i look forward to a day when my will out strips my fear and i can finally do the right thing#and... and i think sharing last time was a mistake#i think i need to queue a post to explain I'm gone so people can know#but in the moment i need to say nothing so people won't worry#not today; probably not this month; maybe not this year#at some point though i need to be gone; and people will realize how much happier they are#how much I've been dragging everyone down with my gloom#nah... in the past I've tended to share when i was actually serious about being close to going through with it#but that's clearly a mistake; being like that on my trip only made people upset#... and maybe i could have found the nerve to go through with it if I'd said nothing#so i think that would be another better policy change too#mask needs to stay on at all times now and forever#i need to improve my situation enough to maximize income to help friends#i need to take out a life insurance policy once I'm making a decent amount#and then two years later i need to step out for good#and i need to show nothing from now on#this post is even too much; but I'm weak#in a way this is goodbye; hopefully soon you won't be dealing with me; only my best face#mm tag so i can find things later
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httpsserene · 8 months ago
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Gosh please please please can you write something daniel x reader maybe inspired by too sweet by hozier when he thinks(some internal turmoil cuz he can't stay away from her) she's too sweet/innocent for him or something like but it turns out to be further from the truth?? I love love love your writing, i think about please's and thank you's at least three times a day since i read it. You're so immensely talented!!!
I'd really really appreciate it.
(i don't mind age gap(like up to 10years), some kinky smut or even a bit of morally grey characters as long as there are no explicit mentions of past relationships or cheating and etc., happy ending plss, and I won't mind if you add a pinch of "who did this to you")
Ly ly ly
𝖍𝖙𝖙𝖕𝖘𝖘𝖊𝖗𝖊𝖓𝖊'𝖘 2𝕶 𝕾𝖕𝖊𝖈𝖎𝖆𝖑 | 𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕯𝖆𝖓𝖎𝖊𝖑 𝕽𝖎𝖈𝖈𝖎𝖆𝖗𝖉𝖔 𝕰𝖉𝖎𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓
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𝐄𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐝𝐞 𝐅𝐢𝐯𝐞: 𝐓𝐒𝐀
Summary: She’s too pure for him. She hasn’t been damaged by life like he has and he hopes you never will be. So, that’s why Daniel can never allow himself to be with her. He knows she’s convinced herself that she can fix him, but he knows that the longer he sticks around, the more he’s ruining her. He finds it cynical: their relationship (or lack of a relationship) reads like one of the books she’s obsessed with: right person wrong time or forbidden love. Daniel learns that it might be a little darker of a trope—like one of her books that she never allows him to see a page of. Content Warning: 18+ only. mdni. implied sexual content. mild!yandere!reader. stalking. sabotage. angst with a happy ending. lando and max are here. not edited at all. mentioned alcoholism. pov switch. fights? idk danny gets his ass beat. possessive!reader. can you find the hozier inspo in here? probably. Pairing: daniel ricciardo x fem!reader (black-coded? but not mentioned in the fic, i think) Word Count: 2.7k words.
Author’s Notes: okay! this is past me (6/11) hoping that the tumblr queue doesn’t do me dirty! this should be posted on thursday, because i won’t be able to manually post it on my own as i’ll be hiking in san diego the whole day :p
this was formatted on mobile so please ignore how ugly it looks :( and also ignore the ugly writing i’ve never written dark/morally gray characters so i’m pretty sure i did your request like terribly LMAO. um also i couldn’t find a way to write smut into it? so again i apologize for that :/
anyways, please bare with me. i’ll make it pretty when i get back to my computer…on sunday 🥴
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Daniel meets you in the elevator. At first, he thought you were a Formula One fan who snuck into the condo trying to get a glimpse of your favorite driver (himself, obviously) but, he learned that you’re his new next-door neighbor. It was awkward; he accused you of following him to his room and felt like the world’s worst person when you—dressed in the cutest pink dress and matching flowy bow tied in your hair—stared at him terrified, before you unlocked the door to your flat and slammed the door behind you quickly without a word.
He sent you a bouquet of pink orchids the next morning, along with a hand written card apologizing for his rude behavior and that he hoped the two of you could become good neighbors and friends. It seemed all was fixed, as the next time he ran into you, you greeted him softly, like nothing had happened. It was 5 A.M: you were starting your day and Daniel was ending his night.
Daniel was on his third drunken attempt of shoving his key vaguely in the direction of his lock on the door, when you exited your flat with a yoga mat over your shoulder and a water bottle that was comically large. With a hushed ‘good morning,’ you kindly helped Daniel into his apartment, telling him to drink a big glass of water and have pain killers ready when he wakes up; there was no judgment in your wide brown eyes, only tenderness, and a slight hint of worry. He woke up after twelve at the sound of a knock, his head pulsing with pressure and his sight slightly blurry from not quite sleeping all the drunk away.
He eventually made it to his front door and found that you ordered him lunch: a chicken wrap and sweet potato chips, from one of his favorite brunch cafés—Daniel figured you have good taste, as he doesn’t recall ever telling you about this meal in either of the two interactions you’ve had. So, he ate, drank plenty of water, freshened up, and debated if he should go over and express his gratitude, or whatever. He decided he will, and found himself putting on a nice watch and a few too many sprays of his expensive smelling cologne. Daniel didn’t let any thoughts of why he was prettying himself up cross his mind; he’s simply thanking you; a girl far too young, and probably far too sweet for his tastes.
You brushed off his thanks shyly, hidden behind your door with a blush strong enough Daniel saw it paint your dimpled cheeks and he knew he wouldn’t be able to stay away. Thinking quick enough to rival his reflexes, he offered to exchange phone numbers so the two of you could meet up and he could buy you a coffee. You entered your name in his phone with a yellow heart next to it.
The coffee meet-up had to wait due to Daniel’s hectic schedule, yet the texting flourished. He initiated the beginning of your text thread the next day, mindlessly texting you about how he overheard Emilio (another neighbor) arguing with his wife on the phone; Daniel said she’s probably going to mail him divorce papers within the next week. You replied that it was mean to eavesdrop and gossip. Daniel followed up saying it’s not eavesdropping if said person was screaming into his phone in the hallway, and he wasn’t gossiping, he’s merely keeping you informed.
Daniel laughed in the middle of his motorhome listening to the voice message you sent four days later, eagerly telling him about how you saw Emilio in the lobby with a couple boxes and without a wedding ring on his finger.
It was a warm morning, when you and Daniel finally managed to meet for coffee. You scrunched your nose in distaste when he ordered plain black coffee; Daniel did the same when you ordered a drink that was mainly milk and sugar. Daniel chuckled when you claimed the amount of coffee in your drink had you wired for the rest of the day. He decided to let you believe that, and not inform you that it was most likely the sugar content that had you crashing hours later.
Daniel invited you over for burgers one night and you comment that his home looks like a mix of a “mojo dojo casa house” and a “minimalistic hell.” You gifted him a throw blanket and a potted plant the next day, and continued to text him reminders about watering it.
Around 10 P.M. on another night, he’s yelling at Max for cheating at fifa. Max laughed around the lip of his beer bottle before the two of them paused at the sound of a knock. Daniel checked the door and opened it to see you: fuzzy slippers, eye-mask on your forehead, bonnet, matching pajama set, and pout on your lips with a sleepy tilt to your eyebrows. He apologized for the noise and promised to quiet down. Daniel threatened to kick the Dutchman out when he teased him for having a “crush.” He doesn’t get crushes, he’s a grown man.
Daniel spends less time in night clubs and more time with you. You took him to sip and paint nights, pottery classes, hiking, even bookstores. You order him to not open any of the books he’s holding for you; Daniel tries to take a peek when you scan through one and you slam the book shut, saying it’s too dark for your liking. He doesn’t comment when you end up getting it (Daniel paid).
He kissed you in your apartment, halfway through Howl’s Moving Castle. He proceeded to tell you it was a mistake. You teared up when he said you were too pure for him, arguing back that you weren’t a child. The tears fell when Daniel claimed he’s too old for you, that he’d only hurt you. He returned to his apartment, figurative tail tucked between his legs, and heard you crying through the wall. He fell asleep hating himself.
Daniel distanced himself from you; he misses your shared adventures and condo gossip, but he never forgets to water your potted plant, even without your texts. He fell back into the clubs, bringing home various women but never manages to get them in bed due to various things going wrong. He gets stuck in the elevator with Stephanie who happened to claustrophobic for hours, locked in the stairwell with Sofia who sprains her ankle in five-inch heels, the fire-alarm interrupts him and Kiana just as he unlocks the door, and his kitchen sink burst when he lifted Laura on the counter.
He tries to console Laura, who runs from his flat in drenched clothes, and sees you staring at her in confusion from your doorway as she rushes past. Daniel apologizes for waking you again, and you shrug, ignoring his words, murmuring that he should call maintenance before he floods the entire floor and shutting your door in his face.
Your potted plant starts to wilt, no matter if Daniel moves it in or out of direct sunlight, if he waters it less or more, or if he changes the soil, or adds fertilizer. The universe has it out for Daniel.
He finds himself in an ultra-private lounge, dim-lighting, sultry piano, and dark decor enhancing his dramatics as he reveals how he ruined his life to Max, Lando, and the bartender who will be tipped handsomely for pretending to care. The piano fades to the end of the piece just as Daniel wraps up his lament.
“It sounds like you deserve it, honestly,” Max stated bluntly, Lando nodding agreeably at his side.
Daniel groans into his hands, lifting his head to say that he’s already aware of that, but freezes when he sees you rise from the seat of the piano. Your figure is snug within a floor length, backless, black dress, complemented with gold jewelry, and makeup that opposes your angelic nature. You bow your head slightly in the direction of the tables clapping at your performance, stumbling briefly when your eyes meet Daniel’s. You smile softly and begin to make your way over to him.
“Oh, fuck,” Daniel shrinks into his seat, as the other two drivers stare at him in confusion.
“Hi, neighbor,” you start airily, before turning to smile at Lando and Max, “Hello.”
“You didn’t tell me you worked here,” Daniel mentions.
“You never asked,” you narrow your eyes at him, before relaxing, “I also don’t work here—this is my brother’s bar. The pianist suddenly fell sick and I offered to fill in.”
“Oh,” Daniel hums, “This doesn’t seem like your type of scene.”
You snort, rolling your eyes, “You should know better than to tell me where, what, or who I do or do not belong with.”
“Okay!” Lando claps, kicking Daniel’s shin under the table, everyone ignores his muffled groan of pain, “Sit with us for a minute, if you can take a break. Danny is seriously obsessed with you.”
You take the offered chair next to Max and sigh, “Really? I couldn’t tell,” all three men wince at your dig, but you continue, “Did he tell you that he almost flooded the entire floor last week?”
Daniel watches as you charm his friends, the three of you chattering happily over his demise, and ignoring him as you do so. He can’t find it in himself to be annoyed, only thankful, as this is the first time in weeks that you’ve been in his presence for more than five minutes. You smell so good. Is that weird of Daniel to think?
Unfortunately, the four of you are interrupted far too soon. Your brother calls you over from behind the bar; his expression is less than pleased, jaw tensed with irritation, and Daniel thinks the look in his eyes has a hint of crazy. He wonders if you told your brother about him. Hopefully not—the man looks like he could fold Daniel like a lawn chair without breaking a sweat. The three men watch as you argue with your brother; it doesn’t seem like it’s going in your favor.
Lando calls Daniel’s name, “Mate—she’s good for you.”
“Nah, mate. I’ll only ruin her.”
“Daniel,” Max scolds, “The few months you were ditching us for her were the happiest I’ve seen you. I wasn’t worried that you would be passed out in a random club or yacht after giving yourself alcohol poisoning.”
“She’s sweet, Danny. I think she’s exactly what you need,” Lando adds, “You've convinced yourself that you don’t deserve anything good. She’s trying to prove you wrong and you need to let her.”
He doesn’t answer verbally, he chooses to shake his head and remain silent. You make your way over to the table again and stand in front of them with a pout.
“It’s past my bedtime, apparently,” you huff, turning your head to glare at your brother, “Don’t worry about paying tonight, it’s on the house.” You exchange polite goodbyes with Lando and Max, Daniel gets a soft smile. He watches you leave the bar with a sad tilt to his lips, then orders a shot of whiskey.
You’re sat on your couch, freshly showered and ready for bed. It’s 1 A.M. and Daniel usually doesn’t end his nights out for another hour. So, it makes sense for you to be worried when you see his location nearing your shared condo building an hour early. Did you sneakily (his phone password is his birthday, it wasn’t that hard) use his phone and share his own location with you? Yes. But, you did it with good intentions. You worry about him when he’s not with you.
You decide to go down to the lobby and pretend to ask if you received any packages in hopes of intercepting Daniel when he walks in. You don’t manage to step out of the elevator when you suddenly have an armful of a bruised-up Australian. His lip is busted and you can see a bruise blooming high on his right cheekbone. You start to shake with anger.
Furiously pressing the button of your floor and slamming the ‘close door’ button, you frantically question Daniel, “What the hell? I left you not even two hours ago, and you look like a mess. Did you get into a fight, did you get mugged, did you—“
“Did your brother beat my ass for hurting you?” Daniel groans, not fighting your motions as you tug him out of the elevator and into your flat, “Yes, he did.”
You pause and grumble angrily, forcing Daniel to take a seat on your couch. You rush into your kitchen for ice, then to the bathroom for a first aid kit. He doesn’t fight when you order him to ice his cheek, and lets you hold his face to tilt his head at every angle possible, as if it’ll expose any more damage. Eventually, you end up looking into his eyes, pretending that you have the knowledge to know what a possible concussion looks like, even though you really just wanted an excuse to look at him.
Unconsciously, your thumb rubs soothingly along his temple, Daniel leans further into your hand. His tongue flicks out for a brief second, and he flinches when it disturbs the cut on his bottom lip. Blinking rapidly, you clear the haze from your eyes and frown as you turn to rifle through the first aid kit.
“I can’t believe he put his hands on you,” you bite out angrily, finding a disinfectant cloth to clean his lip, “I don’t know why I tell him anything anymore.”
Daniel winces at the sting of alcohol, remaining quiet as he watches the focus that covers your expression.
“I apologize for him,” you mumble, “He doesn’t think clearly when it comes to me, he thinks he’s like my guard dog or something,” you dispose of the wipe and grab an ointment, “I promise you I told him that the only thing you did was waste my time and hurt my feelings,” Daniel deflates under your hands, “It’s not like you physically hurt me…or anything. He’s just an idiot. I’ll kill him.”
At that, Daniel laughs quietly, dropping the ice from his cheek so you can clean that too, “Don’t say that. You’re such a sweetheart, you couldn’t hurt your own brother. Also—I’m not sure if he hoped this would make me stay away from you, because if you keep rubbing my face like that, I might fall in love.”
You hum, pleased you have him eating out of the palm of your hand, “Have some decorum, Daniel. You sound desperate. Also, he knows that I don’t like people touching what’s mine.”
“Oh? You’re possessive,” Daniel teases, “Is it bad if I kinda like that?”
Your heart flutters, he’s really the best for you. He doesn’t need to know about the lengths you went to ensure any of the girls he tried to bring home didn't make it into his bed. It's a shame Sofia sprained her ankle; that was not intentional on your part.
You shrug lightly, “No, it’s not bad. I think it makes you perfect for me. As long as you don’t mind a little crazy. And—don’t think you’re off the hook. You still have to apologize for making me cry.”
Daniel nods seriously, “I’ll fall to my knees and beg right now, if that’s what it takes.”
Sticking a plaster over his cheek, you stand and gesture for him to do so too, “Okay. Kneel.”
“Huh,” he chokes, eyes wide with disbelief, “You’re serious?”
“If you beg well enough, I’ll let you eat me out.”
The sound of his knees hitting the floor echoes.
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markscherz · 7 months ago
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Can I ask how you feel about your Tumblr fame?
I get the impression you just made this account for normal casual funsies reasons, but it kinda blew up by happenstance. If that's right, I'm curious if now you feel like it's kind of a more serious thing, where you have an opportunity to sorta act as a science communicator with a reach you otherwise might not?
Or maybe something else? You gonna see if you can somehow leverage your Tumblr fame to get research funding? Deputize us to harass polluters and developers destroying habitats? Crowdsource name ideas for new species?
It's a bit bizarre, in that it has very little real-world-ness to it. I showed my mother the ongoing tumblr celebrity poll, and she was like 'how many people could possibly be interested in frogs?', to which I replied 'well as of today about 46,000 and counting'.
I have always had an unhealthy relationship with fame. I spent most of my teen and young adult life fawning after it, as is I suppose very often the case.
More after the cut…
I always really wanted to be famous, but I was never really interested in changing who I was or what I represented in that pursuit. That is to say, I wanted to be known for what I was already doing, or for things that were already interesting for me, rather than things that might have much higher chances of success but require more effort or be less in line with the things that I am interested in.
I had my first brush with virality in 2012, when a poem I wrote went a little viral (largely thanks to StumbleUpon). I remember the rush of seeing how much attention it was getting, and staying up late to keep refreshing the page as the visitor numbers went up and up and up.
But not long after that, I had some closer encounters with fame and people becoming famous. That was extremely eye-opening. I witnessed first hand how strongly that can affect someone's life, for good and for bad. That experience also made me realise, quite jarringly, that famous people are still just people; that celebrity is something extrinsic to them; that they also wipe their own butts (if they are able); and that in many cases, it is a substantial inconvenience if not downright pain in the ass for them. I think this is why we see so many of the big celebrities having mental health crises or trying to live as much of their lives out of the public eye as possible.
That experience pretty much stifled my desire to achieve fame, and really changed my relationship with it. I should add that I could say much more on this topic, but nothing so coherent or insightful as John and Hank Green, who have given me so much clarity on this topic over the years through their thoughtful commentary on youtube and their podcasts.
Anyway, in spite of the fact that fame itself doesn't really appeal to me anymore, I do still have a problem wherein I quickly became addicted to the microdosing of euphoria associated with every reblog and like and follow. So I put huge efforts into social media in order to try to gain traction in the space that I felt I could really compete in—Very Niche SciComm™—and build up a following.
Tumblr was the first platform where I felt that really succeed; I managed to fight my way to a few thousand followers with a thick queue of regular posts about herpetology and other science. At that time, there was a great community building up in the rudimentary private messaging system—I am still friends with several other tumblr bloggers from that era (none of whom I have ever met in person). From that early time (2013), I think my most successful post was probably this one about germination of 32,000 year old seeds—a post that, as of today, has 836 notes, but at the time felt huge and exhilarating.
As I went through gradschool, I got more and more active on twitter, and less and less active on tumblr (by the time I wound down, I had about 8,000 followers on tumblr). This was partly because of the pornbot takeover on tumblr, which meant I basically could not go on the platform in public or at work, but also because the audience and interactions are just fundamentally different. Twitter had a different kind of vibe and energy than tumblr, and there were real SciComm experts there, who were doing it just completely differently. More importantly, I became more focussed on doing outreach aimed at colleagues, rather than non-experts.
Then, in 2017, I hit headlines for the first time. The description of Geckolepis megalepis made it big on social and traditional media, and I had my first experience with real media attention. I had a flurry of late-night phone-calls with journalists in the US. This was a different animal altogether than the few viral posts I had had until that point. It was extremely stressful, but exhilarating. Then in 2018, our chameleon fluorescence story made similar headlines, and in 2019 the Mini frogs, and in 2021 with gecko fluorescence and the smallest chameleon.
Seeing my name on the BBC News website and in the New York Times and National Geographic—those things have been the most surreal moments of near-fame I have experienced so far. The number of followers on social media is quite difficult to conceptualise, but seeing your own name in a media outlet that you consume regularly, or have grown up with, is more palpable.
In any case, I continued to run with twitter as my main platform for years, because I found the interaction with colleagues and other academics highly stimulating. In 2021, I even posted a twitter thread about a different species of frog from Madagascar every day for the full year. All this work was ultimately greeted with mediocre success; I just crested over 10,000 followers a few months before the Musth takeover. But then the platform became basically unusable. And in the fallout, I came back to tumblr, where, just by chance, I happened to find a post about the Mini frogs and reply to it and it went properly viral and now here we are. In the space of a year, I went from having 8000 followers to having >46,000.
How do I feel about that? It's bonkers. I think it is great that so many people are interested in hearing the Good News about frogs and other creatures. But I also feel like I am not really on the same playing field as most of the others in that poll mentioned above, in that I do not have any of the celebrity that several others have. And I know for a fact that there are fanblogs with far, far larger followings than I have. But perhaps that is the great thing about tumblr; that the playing field is somehow levelled…
What's the point of this ramble? Well, first I guess it is to outline that I have given fame a lot of thought over the years, and I have a long-standing and complicated relationship with it, and take it quite seriously. Second, to illustrate that I have been working on as a science communicator or person in outreach for many years—it has kind of been my social media brand since I started gradschool in 2013. And third, to kind of outline how we got here, because I often feel like you have to know where an arrow has come from in order to figure out which direction it will continue to fly.
You asked if I would somehow try to leverage my tumblr fame to get research funding—I already do that. In fact, my social media activity had a signfiicant role in landing me my current job, and will continue to help me achieve tenure. Outreach is an important part of my job, and funders like it too.
I would love to have the community-building power and tenacity of the brothers Green; Nerdfighteria has achieved some incredible things over the years, and the power of that community is now being seen at an unprecedented scale in their battle for equitable access for tuberculosis diagnosis and treatment. But I do not have that in me; this platform is the wrong one for community activation, and my community is still too small for that. Moreover, it is not organised or structured, in the way that I think effective deputisation would require.
As for the crowdsourcing of name ideas, that is currently off the table. I like to try to name things on my own or with my colleauges; it is a very good part of the process. And I have yet to hear a suggestion for a Mini species epithet that I had not already come up with myself, so I am not convinced that this would really augment the experience.
So for now, I hope that the main way I use the platform, and the power that comes with a few thousand followers, will be to spread the Good News about frogs and other wonderful animals, and the other kinds of science happening around us (and occasional other off-topic content). I hope that you are encouraged to explore the world around you, and to do your own reading to find out more about the subjects that interest you. And also I will continue to try to make meme-worthy content, because it does nice, if addictive, things in my brain when I get the clicks.
Thanks for asking, anon, and sorry for the Wall of Text.
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the-phantom-author · 1 year ago
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Hasan Piker | Stream Appearance headcanons
I'm in so much pain rn it's not even funny, imma take some pain killer and sleep. Reblogs always welcomed. Request are open!
Partner streams with Hasan are very chaotic in general. However nothing would truely match the partner reveal twitch stream I imagine the stream would have “Secret special guest” or something in the title. I would start out as a normal stream, personal life, politics, and so on until it's about 2-3pm. The entire time He’d be staying that there is someone coming later, and they need to be on their best behavior . When talking about his personal life at the start of the stream he’d mention that his partner is staying over and swiftly moving on, not an uncommon thing for him to do, so nothing was really thought of.
When you show up, he introduces you by saying “Chat, introducing to you, for the first time on any platform, my partner.” Queue chat losing their collective mind, and starting to ask any and all questions they can think of. He’s incredibly watchful of chat during this time, and instantly banning anyone who sends a chat saying or implying something rude about you. This is also followed by the obligatory Joe Rogan video that he makes girls watch when they first appear on stream.
After the reveal stream I can imagine you becoming a recurring person, mostly tiny cameos. Like, every so often your hand will pop into frame to hand him something, water or food. It always causes him to stop what he’s in the middle of doing at that moment and thank you, he could be knee deep in a 10 minute stun lock and just have to hand him a water bottle and he’ll come to a full stop until you leave the room at which point he’ll pick his little rant back up.
I can also see stream bits that include you. Painting streams (more on that later), movie reviews, true crime, and other react andy things are not uncommon things for you to be on stream for. For example he would let you just rant about any movie you’ve watched, recently or not, for like thirty minutes. Like, yes girl, explain Tinkerbell and the Great Fairy Rescue to chat, they’ll love it.
Or he’ll get you to watch older reality TV shows, and videos that pertain to your interest. You know these J-Aubery mini-docs that he’ll watch, he’ll also get you to watch them. Anytime something comes up that you don’t understand, he’ll make sure to pause it so he can explain it to you until you do. If you are watching something and he doesn’t get it but you do, he does expect you to explain it. Sometimes he’ll have you explain things to him on stream just because he likes to show off how smart you are to chat.
Sometimes when you go to give Kaya some pats, you hover in the background. Mainly when you're interested in what he is watching/doing or when you’re trying to figure out just what he’s going off about, I can only imagine how confusing it must be to walk into the middle of him being stunlocked by some chatter.
He will absolutely make fun of how short you are, no matter your actual height, because man is built like a brick house and everyone is smaller than him.
I almost forgot about IRL streams. Please find a way to go on any and all IRL streams with him. Especially if it’s some kind of shopping stream. Take every chance you can to fix his fashion sense, it’ll never take but you should still try.
He’d also take you to Shitcamp and the Streamer Awards. I know they are not his live streams but he likes you being there. You’re not really a contestant or anything, but you take part in certain games and activities. Chat loves seeing you in the background, not really participating but still being iconic.
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thoughtcascades · 2 months ago
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What are the consequences to keep in touch with an emotionally unavailable man that tells you that for now he doesn’t want anything serious and wants to see you only as a friend and know each others more?
Staying with an emotionally unavailable man who's already told you - "I don't want anything serious" - is signing up to get hurt, over and over again, and calling it love. It's self-destruction masquerading as patience. You're standing in a queue, waiting for a train that never comes. You already know it's not coming, but you tell yourself that maybe the timetable will magically change just for you. Spoiler: it won't. That guy is not a mystery to be solved, or a misunderstood anti-hero in a Netflix drama. He's just someone honest enough to tell you what he can't give, but selfish enough to keep you around anyway. And that's the game. He gets the comfort of your presence, your attention, your hope, without ever having to give anything real in return. It's exploitation on a vibratory level. He's feeding off the space you hold for him, while giving nothing but breadcrumbs. The audacity. The consequences: First, your self-esteem will take a hit. You'll start to equate your worth with his mood swings. If he's responsive and nice? You'll feel high, maybe you're winning him over. But if he pulls away or reminds you of "the rules" (friends only, remember?), you'll spiral. This inconsistency rewires your brain, making you crave the highs so much that you tolerate the lows. You become the one clinging to the possibility even though it's killing you. And he's fine because he's not attached to any of it. He's got his limits, his freedom. And you? You're drowning in his emotional currents. He doesn't want to "get to know you better". That's code for "I like what we've got going, so why mess it up by adding responsibility?" He's keeping you at arm's length, just close enough to keep you invested, but far enough to avoid accountability. He knows. He knows you care more than you should, and he's fine with that imbalance because it works for him. This isn't cluelessness. It's calculated selfishness. People like this thrive because society romanticizes this toxic nonsense. Movies, songs, social media - they all sell the idea that if you love someone hard enough, they'll finally wake up and see their worth. It's a lie. Love doesn't fix people. Your patience won't magically unlock their ability to care. And yet we keep buying into this garbage narrative, thinking we're the exception to the rule. We're not. Staying in this dynamic isn't just bad for you - it's bad for everyone. You're enabling his behaviour. By staying, you're teaching him that it's OK to use people as emotional placeholders. You're telling him that he can get the benefits of intimacy without the responsibilities. He'll keep doing it with you, and then with the next person, and the next. It's a cycle. And every time you make excuses for him, you're not just hurting yourself - you're hurting the world in a kind of existential ripple effect. You're losing pieces of yourself. Your sense of independence, your boundaries, your ability to recognise when you're being abused - it all erodes. You'll become someone who settles for less, someone who settles, someone who thinks they have to earn the love that should have been given to them for free. And for what? For a man who told you in advance that he couldn't give you what you needed? People will tell you to "just walk away" because it's sooooo easy. It's not. Walking away feels like ripping your own heart out. But staying? Staying is like letting them rot from the inside out. Choose your poison. Either way it hurts, but at least there is a way to heal. You deserve to be with someone who doesn't make love feel like a waiting game, someone who doesn't treat your feelings like a convenience store to be visited whenever they feel like it.
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bitchy-peachy · 7 months ago
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ALL MONEY ASKS GET REPORTED TO STAFF AND BLOCKED.
[mostly queue operated : 10 posts per day]
Extra socials I rarely use:
Bluesky
For those traumatized by my blog:
Free Therapy
(⬇️check before following me.⬇️):
TAGS
[ #noodity and/or #smutty (if you don't want to see artistic nudes or smutty art reblogs. I have a good reason for not tagging these #nsfw)
#spoilers (I tag anything new for any fandom coming out as #spoilers to keep you all spoiler free.)
#fandom, #fandom discourse (if you don't wanna see me complain about fandoms)
#horror, #tw blood, #body horror and #dark art (if you don't want to see fun splatter or spookiness that may be triggering since some people er... don't like it as much as me.)
#personal, #personal pics #ramblings, #rant, #rant in tags, #!!! (if you don't want to see the most random ramblings ever along with pics, long winded tag rants and me boosting things... although I would want you to boost things in the #!!! tag)
As well as #witchy things (if you don't wanna see me talking my "evil hocus pocus" stuff)]
#politics, #news, #SA mention, #true crime are also recommended to blacklist if you don't like such subjects (and my ranting violence at criminals and hating on the injustice system. I'm a huge pig with badges hater especially since I see 97% bad shit)
#me being blasphemous is pretty self explanatory.
Things That Will Get A Block
Associating with people that have hurt me and my friends
Content thieves. Art, fanfiction etc. Plagiarism and art reposts without credits to get attention on yourself with other people's work is a no.
People that start fights over literally nothing. People that are overly reactive and see "something bad" in anything and start drama about it.
Homophobic, transphobic etc people get blocked.
Right wing conservashits and western commie shits (which are just as bad as conservatives) get blocked. I grew up in a conservative family and I've heard your kind of nonsense repeatedly. None of you are creative and bring nothing new to your "arguments" so I see no point in searing my damned eyes with your uninspiring stale bullshit.
Racist twats get blocked. I ain't gotta see your dumbass. Nobody does.
Porn bots, empty accounts, business accounts, weird content that gives me ick (if you don't tag your poop, diaper and piss play, necrophilia, age play, etc... all which I don't want to see and properly filter.)Like I've got weird fictional interests and personal but even I've got my limits and people ain't even tagging it to avoid getting banned in random main tags that has nothing to do with it.
Even at my married grown hag age I've had guys act inappropriately towards me almost immediately after I made the mistake of following them back. Block, reported. I'm too old for that shit.
Don't waste your time sending me asks or DMs asking for money. Some of you spam this shit to the point of becoming overwhelming. Fuck outta my asks and dms with this. You're obnoxious and its too damn much. Tired of having 30 asks begging for money and dms from fake ass accounts asking me for money cos I made the mistake of thinking they were a legimate follower. Sincerely fuck off and away to my block list.
Minors. Like where are your parents? If I find a minor following me, I'll at least do a soft block. Follow me when you're an adult.
If I block you for any of these things you'll probably stay blocked forever unless something happens that it was a misunderstanding etc..
Random Things About Me
[Status: Taken 💍 but we share each other with fictional characters]
[🧿🔮Ecletic Bruja. Some of my stuff is closed practice but I do share generalized info. Just not closed ancestral matters..]
[Horror/Gore movie/book obsessed: I also reblog a lot of dismemberment and innards which explains the #body horror or #tw blood tag.]
[A bit of a classical art snob. I love old art, the darker and more tragic the better. You can find pretty things of this nature as well as fandom fanarts in #art]
[I ain't 100% "politically correct". I can drag both left and right and my politics can fluctuate between center-right or center-left depending the issue. Example: I support the death penalty (as long as there's no reasonable doubt whatsoever. If there is any doubt, cut the bullshit. Especially these racist ass bloody red states that execute innocent people. If you're gonna do this shit be fucking sure first. Also start executing ped0s instead of people that accidentally killed one person in robbery- ok I'm ranting) and abortion. I also support guns but not everyone having them and there being some more restrictions/background checks etc. That was just some examples of my stance on some subjects. (Made bold for emphasis)]
[LGBT+ safe space🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🌈 (if you don't like that gfy]
[I have writer's block on everything sorry]
[Dark Humor galore💀]
[Perverted Humor galore🥵]
[🗡 I will only follow back if I like your content and aren't a shitty p0rn bot or some money begging bullshit. I want actual mutuals to interact with and fangirl with, not a bot or a one post blog that only wants money🗡]
[Hablo Español and can understand spoken/read Deutsch and Portuguese]
[My blog is for me. Don't tell me how to run my shit unless you're a masochist.]
[Account is monitored with statcounter]
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moonchats · 2 years ago
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glue song - S.R
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summary: where spence has a dance with you :)
warnings: major fluff, reader is also an agent,spencer’s bi because just because the writers can take it away doesn’t mean it’s staying away,
*reader is gender neutral and description isn’t described!*
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Your home was homey, green walls and dim litted rooms, it made you in awe of it every-time you walked through the door. It made you smile even more when you realise your boyfriend lived in your dream home without you ever knowing.
You and Spence were close before you finally got together, you two were the best of friends, you sat across from him for 3 years feeling sorry for yourself as he talks about a girl he kissed, or a guy he liked wallowing in self pity, wishing it was you he chose to care for, and wish was there when he awoke. And finally your wish came true. And it had been the best years of your life.
Both of you had the day off, you decided to spend finishing up research and baking while Spence had took himself on a walk to the bookstore on the corner before he got groceries. Chocolate fudge cake, with sprinkles of course, was a favourite of Spencer’s so you decided to make it regularly, and any left overs were greatly appreciated by the rest of your team, which is what you were making now. Spencer and you were insanely alike, both of you loving doing your own thing but in the company of each other, more like shared silence, but both of you still needed recharge time and you both have your own ways of doing it.
Their was cocoa powder all over the kitchen, and cake mix on your face, but with the sound of music humming from the record player throughout the appartement, nothing could diminish such a good mood. With birds lightly chirping from the gutter above the window, and the sun shining on the ever growing collection of books, it was a perfect day.
As if on queue, Spencer walked through the door as soon as you thought of perfect, holding bags of groceries and a smile on his face. “Isn’t this a sight for sore eyes” he gushed, heat rushing to your cheeks, as he placed the groceries on the counter placing a kiss to the top of your head.
“Well hello” You smiled towards him, he wore a light washed pair of jeans with a thin jumper along with his shirt and tie, with the glasses that make you smitten, “,this should be done in about 40 minutes”
The glow on his face was nothing but appreciation, an appreciation of you, and your love for him, “I love you” He smiled, a thank you from him.
“I didn’t even do anything”
“Yeah, but you’re here and so i love you” He responded, your heart full.
The piano started, from a track you both adored, ‘Hooked on romance’ from the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra filled the room. You looked him in the eye, “Dance with me?”
“Dance with yo-, I can’t dance, i can barely stand without falling” He chuckled, you smacked his shoulder lightly, pleading with him with your eyes, “Fine but you can’t judge me.”
His fingers lightly grasped yours before he pulled you into him to rest your head on his shoulder, as you swayed with him to the song, before he pulled away from you, holding on to your hand to spin you around before pulling you back to him. Your head instantly rested onto him again,
“I feel like i’m stuck to you, like i cant think of my life without you” You whispered.
“Then don’t, stop acting like you’ll become a ghost of my memory, i’m here for you, till forever” He rubbed your back and you both carried on swaying.
A smile appeared on your face, which he felt grow against his chest “Then I guess i’m stuck forever”
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by the glue OH AND YOUUUU!!!
also the song they danced too was
it’s on of my fav tracks of all time, please give it a listen if you get time i promise it won’t be a bad decision!!
also, i’m making all my ‘x Reader’ fics gender neutral from now on, i try to limit the description on the reader as much as i can so be as inclusive as possible, please let me know anywhere else i can make it more inclusive with my language
and also please lmk if you enjoyed, spencer is a very comforting character so i love writing fluff for him because it comes to me so easily!!! - Love you to the Moon and back xx
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loversberceuse · 6 months ago
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Hi again. I wanna play with Lunes hair. It looks so fluffy and smooth which makes me wanna play with it even more... But I have basic human sense and would not touch without permission. Which would lead to me just staring at him. Would it creep him out when he isn't affected by the disease, yeah. But like you said, he is major touch starved and I am too.
And I wanna give him a small nom to... I love showing affection through small play bites. Nothing painful or I will cry if hurting them. Now all I see is when he let me play with his hair. I just randomly nom his shoulder making him freak out...
Anyways! I am totally not hyper fixated on this silly lil blog. Ignore that I don't write and when I do it's not as detailed!
Hello, again! Fancy seeing you here! I appreciate all the asks, I love writing for Lune :)
Lune, as you did mention, generally does not like physical touch. This being said, I decided to do a sort of.. Different fic.
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Before the disease:
It's a quiet day in the mattress store. Everyone seems to enjoy staying in their own spaces today, and you're honestly really enjoying it. Well, you're mostly enjoying it. Lune has disappeared off into his "room," and you'd really like to spend some more time with him. Out of everyone here, he's probably the easiest to talk to and just be around.
You decide to see what he's up to. Making your way to his room is a bit of a nightmare, since the store is filled to the brim with supplies. Everyone had tried to set it into a small corner, but things never really turned out that way.
After dodging many boxes of canned food, you finally make it to Lune's room. You knock, hear a hum of approval, and enter.
"Hey, I was just wondering what you were up to today!" You sit down next to him and offer him the blanket you brought with you. It's the Hello Kitty blanket, the one he's always staring at for some reason.
He takes it, albeit cautiously, and wraps it around himself. "Thanks.. I'm not up to much.. I've been drawing, actually.."
"Oh, you draw? That's cool! Can I see?"
"No."
The conversation dies off, and you find yourself staring at him. Well, not him, but his hair. It's just so fluffy, and you bet it could be braided. Maybe you can ask, he could say yes. "Can I t-"
"I know what you're looking at, and no. You can't do anything to my hair. Can you leave now? I want to finish this drawing." He motions to a little sketchbook at the end of his bed.
You sigh, then nod. "Sure, I can leave. I'll be back later, though!"
He nods at you and picks up his sketchbook. That's your queue to leave, so you do.
Maybe one day.
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During the disease:
Lune's found himself thinking more about you lately. He loves absolutely everything about you. He loves your eyes, your hair, the way you smell, everything. The blanket you'd given to him a while ago is his new favorite thing, and it's become difficult to be away from it.
He doesn't remember feeling like this. Horrifying thoughts have been plaguing his mind lately, and Lune isn't sure of how to act anymore. Valkryie seems to be around you constantly. While he didn't mind this before, it's started to make him.. Angry. You should know that he wants to be with you at all times, so why is he getting in the way now?
The best plan of action is, obviously, to be near you at all times. Now, all of your attention can be on him! You need protection, you need safety, you need him. He's certain that you'll learn eventually, it'll just take some time. That's okay, he can wait. Anything for you.
What's happening to him?
It doesn't matter. You're with him right now, and he feels better. He loves talking to you, and Lune is so happy that you come into his room to talk with him. You've been talking for a while, but he seems to have zoned out. That's weird, he doesn't normally do that.
You see that he isn't paying attention, and you lean forward to give him a soft bite on the arm to snap him out of it. "Lune, you're doing it again.. Are you sure everything's okay?"
His thoughts pause, and his mind clears. Do you really care that much about him? Wait, did you just bite him? While he would have been angry about it in the past, it somehow makes him so, so happy. "Did you just-"
"I am SO sorry, I wasn't thinking! I didn't mean t-"
"It's okay.. I'm.. Happy you care this much about me. Thank you." His mouth turns up in a smile, and he sets a hand on your shoulder.
"Oh.. Okay.." You return his smile. and you put you hand on top of the one on he has your shoulder.
Maybe you can do it more often. He's actually warmed up to you, after all! Finally, you've become good friends with him.
He'll let you keep thinking that.
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saturninedreamgirl · 4 months ago
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. 09 october 2024 . jupiter stations retrograde at 21° Gemini 20′ time to reevaluate our growth since july 14, 2024. has this summer felt like information overload or have you been able to discern what a healthy amount of data intake looks like for you? reflect on what your truth around communicating really is. how do you best learn, process, and express yourself? jupiter, when placed in gemini, was known to ancient astrologers as being “in detriment”; that is, opposite the sign of its domicile, rulership, or home placement. if jupiter is at home in sagittarius, then for jupiter to be on the complete opposite side of the zodiacal wheel indicates being the furthest away possible, completely unequipped with normal functioning. to be in detriment is to be in exile in a way, kicked out of your home and needing to find different avenues from what is comfortable and easy in order to survive. this framework is known as essential dignity and debility and is one way astrologers contemplate and interpret the stars.
under jupiter’s influence of abundance, gemini’s usual mental prowess and quick wittedness evolves into an overzealous mental tumor where over-processing situations and feelings becomes the norm. we don’t hesitate to second guess every possibility. long held beliefs become easily unraveled for the ever fluctuating gemini, nothing more than an endless queue of questions. jupiter in gemini is the embodiment of curiosity killing the cat.  jupiter in gemini is represented in the tarot by the eight of swords. the eight of swords shows a woman blindfolded and surrounded by a circle of swords. upon closer inspection, the swords are spread thin and no one is forcing the woman to stay. she needs only to remove her blindfold to leave her current predicament.
the suit of swords reflects an ever thinking mind, mental acuity, and intellect. by viewing the symbols present in this way, we can elucidate the real “swords” keeping the woman trapped are actually her own limiting beliefs, negative self-talk, a tendency to overthink, and in general, self-imposed limitations. the eight of swords (and tarot in general) clarifies a problem while also providing a solution to the difficulties presented—with jupiter in gemini we are being asked to remove the metaphorical blindfold by asking questions about how we actually communicate with others and ourselves. with jupiter stationing retrograde, we are more apt to have the capacity to pause, breathe, and lean inwards for these answers. here are some jupiter retrograde prompts to consider: where is your jupiter placed? how do you like to learn? what are some negative ‘swords’ holding you back right now that might be self-imposed? what would you like to be more curious about over the next few months? what are some ways you can incorporate that topic of interest into your daily life?
if you found this interpretation style intriguing, illuminating, or useful, consider booking a consultation with me at the link in my bio! i practice astrology from a traditional, archetypal lens, while also incorporating modern interpretations and a holistic understanding. i would love to dive into what the stars have to both impress and question about you!
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mysteryshoptls · 2 years ago
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SSR Azul Ashengrotto Tsumsitter Personal Story: Part 1
"A Moment with Azultsum I"
Part 1 (Part 2) (Part 3)
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[Mostro Lounge – VIP Room]
Azul: Fufu, I feel as though I've gained a greater understanding of this Tsum's cooking and decision-making skills…
Azul: And now that I've finished placing the additional preorders… I suppose I should start heading back towards the Lounge.
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[Mostro Lounge]
Azul: Wh-What is going on!? The Mostro Lounge is completely packed!
Azul: It was well within my calculations that we'd have an increase in customers with the Tsum here, but… How has this happened so quickly in such a short amount of time…?
Savanaclaw Student: Hey, can't we get a seat yet?
Pomefiore Student: Hurry up, I wanna see that cute thing I keep hearing about.
[chattering]
Azul: The queue even extends outside the Lounge?
Azul: Hm? That's…
[Azultsum bounces around]
Azul: While I was off ordering supplies and ingredients…
Azul: The Tsum was instructed to stay near the storefront as our adorable mascot.
Azul: What are Jade and Floyd doing, allowing it to roam around as it pleases?
[Azultsum nudges a student]
Azul: The Tsum is pressing one of the Lounge's menus onto a customer?
Heartslabyul Student: H-Hey, stop it. If you keep trying to forcibly push me like that…
Heartslabyul Student: There's no way I'd be able to not order anything! You're too cute!
Azul: What?
Heartslabyul Student: Excuse meee! I'd like to order! Can I get a refill of my drink, and… Also a dessert!
Azul: What in the…
Floyd: Ohhh? Hey, it's Azul. What're you doin' just standing around while we're runnin' around all busy?
Jade: Oh, you've returned. I hadn't noticed due to our little café being much more swamped than usual.
Azul: Jade, Floyd, what is happening here?
Jade: I think you can clearly see what exactly is happening here.
[Azultsum presses a menu against another student]
Scarabia Student: Ah, yeah. The way you push that up against me like that…
Scarabia Student: It's too cute, dammit!  Bring me another drink―
Jade: We've had customer after customer become simply enthralled by how the Tsum eagerly presses the menus onto them with its tiny body…
Jade: Everyone is placing orders left and right, like you wouldn't believe.
Floyd: Yeah, and it's 'cause of that I'm super tired.
Floyd: And if we left Jade's Tsum out on the main floor, it'd prolly just ransack the place, so we had to put it to work in the kitchen.
Jade: That Tsum was so eager to assist us out here, too. It seemed so disappointed that its helping hand was slapped away.
Jade: But putting that aside, if we continue at this pace, we expect our sales to increase by 5 times the usual amount.
Azul: 5 times!?
Azul: True, when Floyd's Tsum was here last, sales increased threefold. Are you telling me that we've already surpassed that amount?
Azul: I should expect nothing less from a Tsum that bears my likeness. I am elated it has great business acumen…!
Jade: Isn't it quite an astonishing amount?
Azul: Indeed. This is a fantastic outcome! I shall have to heap praise onto that Tsum later!
Azul: If it would continue to generate such high profits like this, I would wish that we could keep my mini-me Tsum here forever.
Azul: Ah, and of course, Jade and Floyd. You've both done a fantastic job.
Azul: The increase in sales is all thanks to the two of you allowing the Tsum to do as it pleases!
Floyd: Ahah. It's so rare for you to openly and honestly compliment us like this. Must've been super happy, huh.
Jade: I'm honored by your praise. Incidentally, Azul, would you allow us to suggest something?
Azul: Suggest what?
Jade: We would like to entrust the ownership of the Mostro Lounge to the Tsum.
Jade: That is, in your stead
Azul: Wh-What!?
Part 1 (Part 2) (Part 3)
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Requested by @pianostarinwonderland and @symphonyprincessuta.
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incorrectjaneeyre · 2 months ago
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jane, upon returning to thornfield from gateshead: hi mr rochester
mr rochester: HI??? YOU DISAPPEAR FOR A MONTH AND ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY IS "HI"???
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suzieburself · 2 years ago
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Mike and El’s Opposing arcs in Season 3 and how They Will Lead to the Downfall of Mileven
This will mostly cover season 3, but I’m going to briefly go through the first 2 seasons as well for a bit of context to the overall analysis
Season 1
The milder version of the born sexy yesterday trope. A lot of smart  people have already analyzed this but it’s basically when the nerdy male protagonist that’s easy to project onto gets the superpowered woman who knows nothing about the world. The Duffers faced some backlash for this and said they were subverting the genre by giving El some independence. 
Season 2
Separates the two to give El a new arc not centered around Mike at all while Mike is centered around both her and Will. At the end, they still have had pretty much zero real conversation but they do share a kiss. 
With these two seasons in mind, it seems obvious to the GA that they are in love, but in reality, there is a lot to question in their relationship. Is it really love if El is the first girl that’s ever shown interest in Mike? Is it love if Mike is the first person her age to ever show her any kindness? Is it love if they’ve never had an emotional talk? Is it love or is it still just the born sexy yesterday trope?
Queue season 3 answering these questions…
This is where I can see people disagreeing, but here is what I believe to be El’s arc first throughout season 3, how she gets her independence to throw off the trope and proves her genuine love for Mike. 
Eleven
The season starts off with the Mileven makeout where they playfully disagree and then Mike has to leave, already opening up the illusion that this season is going to be full of Mileven. Then what happens? They break up the next episode and stay broken up for pretty much the whole season. The breakup opens up for the Max and El friendship and for El to become her own person away from Mike.
With Max’s advice, she dumps Mike, not because she doesn’t want to be with him, but because there is a clear lack of communication in their relationship. And although El seems generally happy broken up with Mike and hanging out with Max, Max does have to reassure her that Mike will come crawling back to her. 
The most interesting El line from the season is “How do I know what I like?” 
This holds a lot of significance in terms of Mileven because again, El is very new to the society and all relationships. She’s still figuring herself out and I think this line perfectly captures her arc this season of figuring out what she likes or in this case, who?
Through the season, we see her warming back up to Mike during the sauna test, at the hospital, and then when she overhears him at the cabin. Max gives her a lot of advice, but ultimately, no one tells her whether or not she should get back with Mike. That is her decision that she comes to at the end of the show. 
So, where does El’s arc wrap up?
Now she has a female friend which is one of her strongest platonic relationships, she has a father, and she gets to act more like a normal teenage girl and discover what she loves, in other words, she’s starting to fully figure herself out. She’s now a more fleshed out character that doesn’t fall into the born sexy yesterday trope with complicated relationships and real interests. So that leaves the ultimate question… Where does Mike fall into all this?
And that leads us to the closing of the season. This is where El decides that she does know what she likes and even with everything else in her life, even with her independence, she still wants to be in a relationship with Mike. 
Whether you ship Mileven or not, the break up was absolutely necessary for El’s narrative, allowing her feelings to finally be truly confirmed and real. “I love you, too,” she says and this is absolutely genuine, at least based on the rest of her arc. 
So if El’s romantic love of Mike is genuine, then it must be true for Mike as well, right? Obviously, he wants to get back with El just as much as she does with him. Obviously, they are the main couple and so what if they have a small fight? Clearly Mike and El would have similar arcs since they are soulmates and meant to be, right? Right????
Mike
It’s all in the opposing narratives of Mike and El in this season (and honestly the other seasons as well) which is laid out for us in the first scene where they want different things (Mike singing and El telling him to stop). Sure it could be not that deep, but let's look at the two characters narratively speaking. 
Mike is in the perfect nuclear family, he has interests, personality, and good friends. Sure he’s not popular, but like he says in season 4, what if he doesn’t want to be? The only thing he’s missing? A girlfriend, obviously. We all know in order for someone’s life to be complete, they need a romantic interest. 
Original pitch for Mike’s character for the Montauk Project (now Stranger Things)- “Mike Wheeler is twelve. He is a cute kid, but a birthmark on his left cheek leads to much bullying and near-crippling insecurity. He has never had a first kiss, much less a girlfriend. He escapes his insecurities through reading fantasy novels, spending time with his three best friends (Lucas, Dustin, and Will), and retreating into his own vivid imagination. The Dungeon Master of his Dungeons and Dragons group, he writes sprawling adventures with fantastical monsters. When he finds himself on a real adventure, facing real monsters, he will discover a courage he didn't know he had. By the end, he will even kiss a girl.” (Taken from Stranger Things Wiki) 
His arc surrounds a lot of things, but kissing and being with a girl to fight his insecurity is very obviously one of them. 
If we look at Eleven, her arc isn’t about romance at all. Her arc is about discovering the world and finding friends and family who love her, things Mike already has. This comes to fruition at the end of season 3 where she gets everything, friends, family, and romance. When El is without Mike, she actually grows her other relationships such as with Hopper in Season 2 and Max in Season 3 (one could even argue Will in season 4). 
The opposite ends up being true for Mike when he’s with El. Season 3 is the first time we actually get to see them act as a real couple (excluding the Snow Ball) and it is also the first time we see a rift in the party, specifically caused by Mike.  Mike and El are the first ones to leave Dustin and the others in the first episode, he’s the one late to the movies, prioritizing El who he sees every day, over his friends. Sure Lucas is also responsible for making fun of Will’s campaign but that’s not who Will calls out…
“You’re ruining our party!” 
“You’re destroying everything and for what? So you can swap spit with some stupid girl?” 
Everyone is putting the blame on Mike and his prioritization of El over everyone else. So while El is making friends, Mike is losing them. 
Another difference between the two is how they receive relationship advice. This is both of their first relationships so obviously it’s normal to go for advice, but the key is when. Max gives El advice on breaking up with Mike, sure, but she follows her heart in terms of getting back together with him.
In the hospital scene, this is the first time after their break up that they are interacting alone. This only ever happened because Lucas pushed Mike to talk to her, to give her the olive branch. Without him, Mike would have continued to do nothing and let them be broken up.
Through all of this, we still don’t quite have a grasp on Mike’s real feelings. Sure we know he thinks getting back with Eleven would be “logical”, but does he love her?  Well, just like El, Mike does get a moment similar to El’s love confession at the end of the season that is supposed to prove Mike’s true feelings, but just like everything else, it is pretty much the opposite of El’s.
“I love her and I can’t lose her again!”  This is loud, this is panicked, this is public, and this wasn’t even supposed to be something Eleven heard. 
Compared to El’s “I love you, too,” which was quiet, something she took time considering saying, during an intimate moment, and something that was only supposed to be for Mike’s ears. 
Hm, I wonder which one was more genuine?
And if you think just saying he loves El is enough, well look at season 4. Why would they reuse the plot of Mike not being able to say he loves El if it’s so obvious he does love her and already said it? Just the fact that that was an actual plot line proves this one wasn’t enough to prove Mike’s real feelings. 
So still, Mike’s true feelings in his relationship with El are hidden from us. 
And this brings me to the other differences in Mike and El’s actions at the very end of the season when the Byers move. 
All of the romance in this goodbye is initiated by El. Mike’s being friendly, sure, but he doesn’t make any romantic moves on her. El even tries to flirt with him and he is so friendly with her, it becomes incredibly awkward. 
And as El fulfills her arc and initiates a kiss with Mike, saying how she loves him, and making it her own decision, what does Mike do? 
Absolutely nothing. He doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t kiss her back. He doesn’t even close his eyes. 
Thus ends El’s arc. 
And thus opens Mike. 
Thus answers the question of El loving Mike with a “yes”.
And answering the question of Mike loving El with an “I think so?” at best, a “no” at worst, but more likely than not, and “I’m not really sure yet”. 
I’m not going to go into detail surrounding season 4, but his arc only continues from there. We still don’t have that moment of “oh, he loves her” (and if you think it’s the monologue then I don’t really know what to say…). I want to go into more detail of this in a different post and how Byler ties in to that. 
In conclusion, after season 3, we are able to determine El’s feelings as genuine and are not able to yet figure out Mike’s. 
The question still stands, how do we know what he likes? 
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laurabenanti · 1 year ago
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semi-hiatus
september now extended through october
*groans into hands*
okay, look. i know i owe people nothing in regard to explaining where i go and blahblahblah, and honestly??? i doubt many even care (not a self loathing thing, more of a "i have a deep suspicion that 75% of the blogs following me are inactive or bots" kind of thing). but i dunno. i like this void. sometimes it talks back. makes me feel all warm inside and such, you know?
semi-hiatus was a bust. that much is obvious. but like... damn, man. i need to not be on here for a bit. so much has happened in the span of a few months outside of the four walls of my monitor. i feel like a hamster on a wheel: running and getting absolutely nowhere.
SO. NEW TACTIC: stay off tumblr except for weekends (friday counts as a weekend day, i think? sorta? i dunno. limiting to 3 times a week, is the long and short of it).
my dang queue is packed and always running, so it's not like this will become dead. also have some general gifs in the drafts that i can kind of post whenever.
in a way, i kind of think this might help with my creative brain side. i just feel burned out. do i gif as much as i see others here post? absolutely not, but i just need to give myself what i have been telling others who have felt the same: a cozy blanket, a warm drink, and a cookie.
if you're a mutual, you're always welcome to have my discord, as that is pretty much always running on my phone (and how else will i talk to the amazing people i've interacted here otherwise?? tumblr semi-hiatus is not a semi-hiatus from people who bring me back every time). otherwise, my tag and my inbox will be checked when i sign on.
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burnwater13 · 9 months ago
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The Majordomo standing inside Mok Shaiz's (not in frame) office while introducing Boba Fett and Fennec Shand to the Mayor. Image from The Book of Boba Fett, Season 1, Episode 2, The Tribes of Tatooine. Calendar by DataWorks.
This story originally appeared on February 6, 2024. I'll be back to writing new content in a few days. Cheers!
Grogu wondered what kind of training you needed to become a Majordomo. He found the job fascinating. Or at least the manner with which Daimyo Fett’s Majordomo performed the work was fascinating to him. The Jedi hadn’t had majordomos and neither did the Nikto gang that held him. Did they all spent their time hedging, humming, hawing, and trying to get out of saying anything in a straight forward and simple manner? Or was that just what they brought to the job? A natural reticence?
He was going to ask his dad, but Fennec caught up to him first and asked if Grogu would like to help her with a task. Grogu of course jumped at the opportunity to help one of his favorite people. 
“I’m asking you to help because I know how much you and the Daimyo have in common. You’ll understand how to handle the situation in a manner that he’ll find satisfying.”
Grogu realized that Fennec wasn’t really telling him anything and pressed her for more details by tilting his head and narrowing his eyes at her. 
“Look Kid, the Boss has been on the go, non-stop, since the Pykes turned up. Good thing you and your dad showed up here to help out. But, what with one thing and another, like Cobb Vanth taking up all the time in the Daimyo’s bacta tank, Boba Fett hasn’t gotten a good night’s sleep. He’s asleep now and I’d like it to stay that way.”
Okay. That was better. Grogu did have a high regard for the Daimyo and was happy to help him in any way he could. He nodded his head at Fennec and offered to hold her hand.
“Save that for later, Kid. Right now I need you to go with me to the throne room and handle matters for the Daimyo. The Majordomo has a thousand things he wants to bother the Boss with, but I think you’ll be an excellent substitute. After that you can spend some time with the rancor. Your dad went to Mos Eisley, so he won’t be bugging you.”
Grogu thought about that. He and the Daimyo did have a lot in common, including knowing some of the same people. He didn’t mention that to the former bounty hunter very often. Grogu understood that the Daimyo’s father had met several Jedi and it hadn’t gone well. He was glad that the Daimyo didn’t hold that against him. 
He took a deep breath and nodded his head. Helping both the Daimyo and Fennec out and getting to spend the day studying the majordomo without the prospect of his dad nitpicking every choice he made was very exciting. He couldn’t wait to get started.
“Great. Come on. There was a bit of a queue forming when I left the throne room to find you.”
With that, Fennec scooped him up and before Grogu could even think the thought ‘Fennec must be a secret Jedi’ they were actually in the throne room. 
“Majordomo, Din Grogu will be acting on behalf of the Daimyo. Don’t run him ragged. His dad, the Mandalorian, won’t like it. You don’t want that.”
Wow! Fennec didn’t have to threaten Majordomo that way. Grogu was about to tell her that, because she had put him directly on the throne when she walked into the Throne room, but when he turned to look at her to remind her that Majordomo was his friend, she was gone! 
Grogu looked up at Majordomo and smiled. There was nothing to do than get on with the work.
“Very well, Din Grogu, we have many people waiting to see the Daimyo. The first among them is the head of the public market stalls. They complain that the stalls need more space around them to ensure proper flow in both directions. The problem is that the revenue will decrease because that would result in few stalls to pay the tithe demanded by the Daimyo.”
Hmmm. Interesting. Grogu knew the Daimyo would like the people to enjoy the market and fewer stalls would do that, but he also knew that the Daimyo did not want people to think that Tatooine did not honor the person who ensured their safety, day to day. He glanced at Majordomo with one eyebrow arched.
“Yes. Of course. You’re right. Let me bring them in to make their case.”
The majordomo bustled out of the throne room to the ante-chamber where all the people waiting for the Daimyo were cooling their heels.  Grogu sat back in the throne and tried his best to look big and intimidating. He was glad his dad wasn’t there to see him because the Mandalorian would probably ask him if he needed to go to the privy. Grogu really never seemed very intimidating to people, especially not his dad.
“Sir Din Grogu, who is honored by Daimyo Fett by acting on his behalf in all matters that come before him today, I am pleased to introduce you to the honorable head of Market here in Mos Espa. Ecuttel  Daeh. Sir Din Grogu has agreed to hear your request.”
Grogu did everything he could not to laugh as the slender green Mikkian stepped forward. They looked just like all the vegetable based ration bars that Grogu turned away whenever they were offered to him. He certainly hoped that he didn’t let his bias against such foods cloud his judgement. He wanted to represent the Daimyo fairly. 
“Master Sir Din Grogu, I have managed the Market stalls in Mos Espa for many years. We have never had a problem with the number of stalls. Nor any issues with crowding. I cannot imagine why the Daimyo would want to change anything as nothing requires change.”
The voice was silky, soft, and insistent. It reminded Grogu of the few Sith he had run into over his life at the Jedi Temple and after he’d left it. He could not imagine that the Daimyo would like that voice any more than he had. 
He leaned forward on the throne and tapped his fingers on the broad arm of the seat with his left hand. Tap. Tap. Tap.
“I understand, great Din Grogu that change is inevitable, but how do we balance the needs of the people with the needs of our own. For we must protect those stalls from all manner of hazard and mischief.”
The silky voice tried again. 
Majordomo shifted slightly but Grogu shook his head. Then he sighed, long and deeply at the person standing in front of him.
“Majestic Din Grogu, I meant you no disrespect, for clearly you are the embodiment of the Daimyo while you sit on that throne. I understand that you understand these matters well and comprehend the delicacy of the work. We could switch to receiving a percentage of the the daily value bought or sold at the market and though there might be fewer stalls, more people will bring more credits as they find the experience of shopping there more pleasant.”
Grogu nodded and then made a swift motion with his hand, again on the arm of the throne.
“Of course, we will cap the value received to be no greater than the current rent, but having the daily percentage paid to us, our flow of credits will improve and cause less risk within the system overall. You are wise to take such a measure. Your predecessors’ did not have such foresight and I hoped to suggest such a measure to the Daimyo soon. This will be a great success.”
Grogu nodded and the slender Mikkian bowed deeply and then rushed out of the throne room. Grogu hoped that all of the Daimyo’s visitors were as easy to lead as that one.
“Din Grogu you have managed to do so much with just a few gestures. I am in awe of your skills at negotiations of this kind. Master Daeh has been most stubborn when I have addressed this matter with him.”
The Majordomo bowed deeply and went to fetch the next person who wished to speak with the Daimyo. Grogu considered that perhaps all those years at the Jedi Temple and then dealing with the Imps had prepared him for the problems that faced both the Majordomo and the Daimyo. He supposed that when he ‘spoke’ to the next person he could probably forego having an image of a lightsaber swirling in the background. Maybe he’d just create the image of a hovering Mandalorian bounty hunter and see what sort of results he got from that. 
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minorfamilysupremacy · 1 year ago
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re: the future of this blog:
over the next few days/weeks, i’m going to queue up everything in my drafts and clean them out. there’s about 1600 posts, so it should stay active for a while. after that, i don’t know what i’ll do with this — if i’ll post again, leave it as an archive, or just deactivate entirely.
to be honest, it’s become a major challenge to engage positively with this show or fandom (or really, any fandom) after the scandal went down. most of my year has been spent being angry, making myself persona non grata within the fandom, and shouting into an increasingly barren void. i made my own bed, and i’m not denying that, nor do i regret it. that being said, there’s no point in pouring the amount of energy, effort, and time i want to into something that now just feels like slamming my face into a brick wall. some spaces just don’t have room for me, and i’m really thinking they never did in the first place. again, it’s not something i say with self-pity, it’s just a fact of life. not everybody belongs everywhere. it is what it is.
so i don’t know. there are WIPs in the hopper. maybe they’ll be finished, maybe they won’t be. maybe the blog will continue after the queue runs out, maybe it won’t. there are people who are going to be committed and productive and keep their blogs going and their fanworks active. i’m not going to mention anyone by name bc it turns into a weird favoritism pissing contest; you can find them on your own.
i’m not definitively saying this is the end because nothing shows you up faster than committing to it. signs point to very probably, but who knows what will happen in the future. in the meantime, i’ll queue up the posts and let them run. once that’s done, it’s anyone’s game.
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