#do a super boo and then hold down the paw long enough to make it shimmy but not be another super boo

[qqueenofhades]

SUCCESS!

[howdoyousleep3]

i loved that hickies post you did where you went thru with all your pairings🥴do you think you’d ever do one with face slapping (i’m so sorry i am a whore)

Omg stop first of all not a whore, never ever secondly I was just digging through my Inbox and found a request about the dynamics of Daddy Steve and Bucky face slapping! Was that you, nonnie?? Either way, let’s get into it, boo. 😎

Steve and Bucky: I don’t think face slapping is really anything that gets Steve hot. I think it’s more of what tends to happen with anything, which is because it’s Bucky Steve is on-board and hot for it. Steve has dabbled in everything, only has a few strong dislikes, but face slapping lies somewhere in the middle on Daddy Steve’s list of things that make him hot. And we know Bucky was pretty inexperienced before he met Steve, thought he had an awesome sex life.

This is something that would come up in the moment but that Steve would want to talk about more before going through with it, almost like the breathplay and choking bit. I think Steve is a confident and in-control enough Dom to work with these new findings in the moment, not necessarily needing to stop things or hold off in full. Maybe it’s a tight grip on Bucky’s chin, a shake and a “Don’t go dumb on me just yet” that makes Bucky have a much more visceral reaction. I can see this as a night where things have been building, a big night for them, an escalation of sorts. As soon as Daddy shakes his chin, his jaw, Bucky is whining out between clenched teeth—

“Slap me.”

Steve almost busts his nut right there, oh baby, Bucky letting Steve have yet another piece of control. He’d ask for a color with fiery eyes, Bucky would spit back, “Green,” and he’d let go of Bucky’s chin to smack a hand across Bucky’s cheek, his jaw, at about half-strength. Looking down at his boy, mouth open and eyes closed as he makes noises like he’s coming, hand back on Bucky’s chin, makes Steve grind his cock harder into what has to be Bucky’s sweet spot. Bucky’s choking on the word, “Daddy!” when Steve loses some control, brings his hand across Bucky’s cheek again, grips his chin tight enough to bruise, and then another smack, and fucking hell, Bucky’s coming.

I don’t think this pair slaps often. Cheek taps and chin grips are frequent fliers but slapping really only occurs when they’re really riled up. Bucky has to initiate it, which is what they agreed to after they discussed this in full, has to tell Daddy what he wants. I think this goes both ways even though it is heavier on Steve slapping Bucky. I can see them getting super riled up one time, Bucky on top and a confident rider now, Daddy’s hand around his throat. He tells Daddy to slap him and he does but then Bucky’s hand is in Daddy’s hair, opposite resting on his cheek. He flexes his fingers as he groans, roughs out, “Color,” and Daddy almost shouts his answer of “Green.”

It’s fun but it doesn’t happen a lot!

James and Stevie: On the other hand…

These two indulge in face slapping quite often and damn near from the get-go. Steve sees those paws one time and immediately imagines what they would feel like wrapped around is throat or making him hurt. James smacks Steve’s ass, his tits, and his face, the inside of his thighs. Big slappers. I imagine the beginning of their relationships much more formal as we are aware, much more Sugar Daddy than anything. I bet James would have them go over kinks and what Steve was comfortable with. They’d get to slapping and Steve gets hot in his tummy but doesn’t have experience with it so he says, “I’m not sure,” to which James asks, “Do you want to find out?”

They’re near the end of the their list and James can see how hard Steve is through his jeans, is feeling quite aroused himself, and Steve bites his lip, nods his head.

“Words.”

“Yes, Daddy. Please.”

James would snap his fingers at the floor, point to it before turning to spread his legs a bit there on the couch. Steve would end up between those thighs with his hands behind his back like a good boy, pretty tits on full display, so unbelievably graceful that it takes James’ breath away. Daddy tells Stevie he’s a good boy, give him a kiss on the lips before telling him to take out Daddy’s cock. Steve loves Daddy’s cock, at times makes James wonder if it’s too much, but  that love has never steered him wrong in any way. Steve would have both hands on Daddy’s cock, tight around the base making it look so big and ready and yummy, and James would reach forward with his own hands.

“Use your words, your manners, come on, doll,” he would chide, one hand on Steve’s chin and the other resting against his cheek. Steve would get out a. “Daddy, can I—” and James would bring that hand across his cheek hard, would make him take it with a grip on his chin. Steve’s whole body would clench up, is so worried that one roll of his hips up would make him blow his load in his jeans right there. He’s in the middle of shouting when James does is again, arguably harder, tells Steve to spit it out. Steve would be damn near delirious, would be so turned on he would be entirely too close to crying for his liking.

James’ favorite would be slapping at Steve’s face when he’s slurping and choking on his Daddy’s cock. Steve is a loud blower, eats Daddy cock like he’s hungry, makes all those noises that are straight from porn, the gulps and the slurps. Sometimes Daddy will pull him off of his cock to where the head is the only thing there to suckle on and he’ll call Steve a filthy fuckin’ boy, will hold him by the jaw, by the neck, by the hair, will give Steve a few slaps in a rapid pace. Steve will groan, his eyes might go crossed a bit, he might even chuckle around the mouth full.

“Look at you, takin’ this cock and wantin’ to get smacked around for it. Tell Daddy you’re a dirty slutty boy, tell ‘im. Ahh, don’t you take your fuckin’ mouth off’a my cock, you talk with your mouth full, you find’a way.”

(I need a minute, hnnng)

From the face it progresses, which in my brain it’s backwards, but that’s just these two lmao. This moment unlocks the slapping heaven gates for them, helps them realize what they do and do not like. I see this as a common occurrence in their relationship, for pleasure or for punishment, although that’s only spanking and maybe some tit torture. These two are all about it, all the time, no matter the reason. Sometimes, all Steve will want is a slap or two to sate him over until they can actually do something about his pent up sexual energy.

Alpha!Steve and Omega!Bucky: This one is easy for me to answer. I don’t think these two would really engage in face slapping. Steve might give a few cheek taps with a couple of fingers, tight on Bucky’s cheek when he needs to stay focused on taking Steve’s knot, but Steve would never want to bring a hand down across his sweet Omega’s cheek. They can get rough in other ways, lots of hair pulling and love bites with these two, same with moving limbs roughly and chin grips. No face slapping though. Ass slapping? For sure. No face.

Senator Steve and Intern Bucky: Biiiiiiiiiiitch, lord have mercy this pair and slapping, oof. The Senator is mean, here is your second reminder within a week, and I bet he unleased a slap the first time they were together in secret. We remember that tiny tidbit of first time with them? It was super short and didn’t go into a ton of detail but in my head that wasn’t the first time Mr. Rogers had kept Bucky in his office. I bet he had to work on Bucky, work to see if his hunches were correct, that if he were to make a move it would be reciprocated.

And he’s so meeeeeeeaaaaaan he would 100% drag Bucky along, leave him hard and achy multiple times, and I bet the first time Mr. Rogers finally finally gets his hands on Bucky it includes a slap. They’re so riled up and Bucky is so damn desperate that he almost sobs when Mr. Rogers finally presses his lips against Bucky’s. And things get so hot so fucking fast, growls and groans, squeezes, god can you imagine how hard the Senator has Bucky pressed up against that wall or his desk. He’s talking all about Bucky’s sweet little body, all the things Mr. Rogers wants to do to it, thinking out loud about how slutty he could make Bucky. A hand comes up to his cheek, pressed in tight, Bucky knows what it means, and Mr. Rogers purrs, “Y’want it? Huh? You like it a bit rough?” and Bucky just slurs out a long, “Yes, Sir.”

To be honest, I don’t know if Bucky would have any experience with it but in the moment he would want it and would love it. This Bucky learns a lot about himself with this Steve throughout the course of their not-so-serious engagement and this is one of those things. I bet they do it a lot more than the others but still not an every occurrence kind of deal. Mr. Rogers just likes to make sure Bucky is paying attention and still with him and a slap will do that and make Bucky even more desperate so it’s honestly a win-win.

Smol Steve and Bucky Bear: This one was honestly the hardest for me to figure out and I think I’ve decided that they’re up there with my Alpha and Omega in frequency—it would be rare. I think they’re just really into other things that are shows of force? Even then, I don’t think this is a pair that wants to show any kind of force like that. These two are gentler in their shows, more accepting and less condescending. They’re the lips touching as they talk and make love and slow and long and savory kinds. Like these two can go at it more than any of the others taking into consideration Alpha/Omega though. These two pull hair and bite lips and the bruises Stevie gets are from Bucky’s a bit too eager grip. No face slapping here, really.

Nonnie, bless you love you thank you.

[yamithediaperdork]

Jace’s Mall adventures part one: Let’s all go to the lobby! (Mortal instruments)

Following the fathers day show in the park, Jace had mostly accepted his life as a 24/7 big toddler, and while he still could feel SOME shame, he'd learned to mostly accept it. True it wasn't as easy when Simon and Alec had started dating, double so when the the hunter and vampire would make out in front of Jace since the big baby had been told part of the price of being a 24/7 big baby was a lost of any adult privileges, which included 'making stickies.' Still there was other things he could direct that pent up energy into and 5 weeks after the show at the park Jace was all excited to be going to the premier of the new paw patrol movie, having become a HUGE fan of the show. Not only was he getting to go and watch the movie, live at the cinema, But his daddies had let him have big kid cereal, a bowl of frosted flakes! Having big kid sugar fr the first time in so long Jace was semi giddy to begin with, and unknown to both of of his daddies, he had begged and whined till Alec put in a scoop of sugar, and then like wise to Simon. Practically vibrating in his seat as he slurped down the sugar filled milk, getting it all over his bib, he listened to his daddies have a fight. "Come on, your the one who told him he could go. you need to handle this. you KNOW I can barely stand the show!" Alec was saying. "Look, I HAVE to go to this meeting, or the little peace talks I've been working on, for YOU guys I might add, is gonna fall though." Simon growled. "Damn itttt..You owe me big time for thing." Alec grumbled. "I know I know, I'll do that thing with the cowboy boots you like so much." Simon chuckled. Jace giggled quietly at that but having a heads, up, put on his best pouty face, sure he could totally score more treats out of this if he played his hand right. "Buddy we have some bad news.." Simon started and Jace let the tears flow out.

20 minutes later, Jace was dressed and in his car seat, with the remains of 10 cookies smudged on his face and hands and clapping as he bounced up and down. He was wearing of course his normal triple thick diapers since he just peed too much for a single diaper to hold up for long, but over that he had on a white diaper shirt that had a dog bone theme going on and over top of that a pair of blue denim short-alls on with a picture of chase on the front pocket. He had on a pair of white socks and paw patrol themed light up sneakers and he was now kicking them as the sugar was getting to him. "Eee eee eee! Gonna see paw patrol! Paw patrol paw patrol! Gonna see paw patrol all with daddyyy!" He sang, badly. behind the wheel and already with a building head ache, Alec was dressed in black jeans and a black top, and already wondering if Simon being his cowboy stud tonight was worth the headache he was going to have. "Jace buddy, can we lower the volume? Daddy's getting a headache." Alec tried. "Oh no! I'll kiss your head bigger then daddy! Pull over and I'll give you a kissy! Kissy's make it all better like when I got a boo boo on my knee!" Jace said, reaching forward now and trying to grab onto Alec. "Buddy we're almost there and I'll pull ov-" "NOW! Now now now now now now!" Jace said and then started to kick Alec's seat. "JACE SHUT UP RIGHT NOW AND STOP, OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL DRIVE US OFF A CLIFF!" Alec exploded, then looking into the rear view mirror saw the look on jace's face and regretted his words instantly. "Buddy Daddies sorry he didn't me-" he started to say, but got cut off. "...-sniff- WAHHHHHHHHHH! DADDY DOESN'T LOVE MEEEE!" Jace started to bawl. "This is going to be a long, Fucking, Day." Alec whined, pulling over and putting his head on the steering wheel, then getting out to come to the back seat and console the big baby.

After cleaning himself and Jace off of the chocolate and -ugh- booger and tears, they made it to the cinema with only a few minutes to spare. It had taken promising Jace to let him have a big gulp soda to get the water works to finally stop, and with how sudden they did Alec couldn't help but wonder if he'd been played. As they stood in line to get the drinks and snacks (the tickets had been purchased already thankfully) Jace suddenly got excited and started to wave to a group of boys and if it hadn't of been for the iron gripe Alec had on the babies other hand he would of gone running over. "HI KEITH! KEVIN! IT'S JACE! YOU KNOW? FROM THE PARK!" Jace hollered, trying to get their attention. "Jeez Jace, was that loud enough? I don't think they heard you in china." Alec muttered, and turned to see four boys coming over. "Oh hey! it's the big little guy." Kevin said smirking. "Wheres your daddy?" Keith asked. "Huh? Right here!" Jace said and then Glomped on Alec's arm, before a dawning look came on his face. "OH! yeah! Other daddy! This daddy is dating my main daddy and he's trying to be super duper cool. It's a struggle for him, cuz you know, he doesn't even like paw patrol." Jace said, leaning in and using a mock whisper for the second part. "..I'm Alec, you must be the kids who were spoon feeding Jace." Alec said, rolling his eyes. "heh. Nice to meet you. I'm Kevin, this is Keith, and those are Alex and Jacob." The one with a brunette crew cut said. "Oh! your little guys!" Jace squealed and giggled, and the twin's were instantly blushing and squirming. Did you get them in diapies yet?" Jace asked, looking at the twins tight pants. "N-No!" The twins both huffed and whined, insulted by Jace just blurting stuff like that out in public, but to baby Jace and alec, it looked like they were annoyed to be still in big boy undies. "Now now, don't be cross with Jace..he's just a baby." Keith scolded the blonds, shaking a finger at them. "So what movie are you guys coming to see? I bet it's paw patrol isn't it? Oh! we could all sit together!" Jace started babbling away. Hearing that Alec got his hopes up for a minute, and was about to ask if the kids wanted to make some money babysitting Jace throughout the movie, only to have his hopes dashed as Keith answered. "Nah, don't get me wrong, paw patrol is SO awesome." Keith was saying, smirking and clearly just saying what Jace wanted to hear. "But these two wanna watch the new My little pony movie so-" "NUH-UH!" Jacob cut in. "We're watching the new Rock movie!" Alex added. "They're only saying that to save face." Kevin said and winked. "Ohhhh..hehehe well of course. cuz my little pony is sooo dumb." Jace said and winked back. As the Twin's fumed Jace said bye bye and him and Alec got their drinks and popcorn and headed for their movie.

Ten minutes into the movie and Alec was wishing he'd snuck a flask in, somehow Jace turned out to be the quietest kid in the room. Not only, that, the most popular and fights had broken out among the real toddlers over who was gonna get to sit next to the big kid who had SUCH a awesome possum outfit. Stuck in a sea of 2-5 year olds and with many of them apparently unashamed to pass gas at a moments notice, Alec was sure he was gonna have to have his nose removed before the halfway point. Jace, who was torn between watching the movie and basking in his newfound popularity decided to put them all to shame but getting up on his seat and letting out a fart to end all farts, taking advantage of Alec having a hand over his face. His legs were a little wobbly from starting to come down off of his sugar rush and as Alec turned and looked, one of three things happened. 1) Jace started to slip and tried to balance himself but planting his butt on something stable, which turned out to be Alec's face. 2) The fear of the fall and all the junk food, made Jace let out more then just a fart, and he filled is \diapers as his butt was again, planted in Alec's fact. 3) trying to get the stink bomb out of his face, Alec pushed Jace which while the little guy recovered without falling, came at the cost of his big gulp he'd been holding, and ended up dumping it on Alec. Needless to say they didn't finish the movie and Alec swore he was never ever taking Jace to the movies again, and promised Jace he was going to regret ALL of this the next day. Jace, wisely stayed quiet on the drive home, where upon coming in they were greeted with the smell of weed, and the sight of Simon on the couch smoking a fatty, having lied about the peace talk meeting being today and had just wanted some alone time. Jace wasn't the only one to end up in a corner with a red ass.

[mustangshelby04]

Boston Boy - Marriage Advice

This is just me being a little catty towards a certain ex while giving you guys more looks at our favorite couple’s married life.

Kate played another round of peek-a-boo with her and Chris’ nine-month-old daughter.  They were in LA for the premiere of Gifted, Chris’ movie that he had been filming when he and Kate met.  He had been super nostalgic over this press tour.  When he had filmed Ellen the day before, he had actually opened up to her about what it was like being a newlywed and new father to their daughter.  It had made Kate tear up.

Her excitement was through the roof for today, though.  After the premiere, she and Chris were taking Madison over to Twitch and Allison’s house for dinner.  Twitch had remembered their talk from the year before and had invited them as soon as they had walked into the studio.

“Kate, we need to get you dressed and finished, babe.” Jenn said, walking over to Kate and making faces at Madison.

“Ok.” Her hair was up in rollers, but her makeup had been done already. “Mom!”

“On it!” Helena came in and took Kate’s seat while her daughter kissed Madison’s cheek and went back to the master bedroom.

Chris was working on tying his tie and Kate nodded appreciatively. “That suit is going to look so good on you, baby.” She said.

“Not half as good as you will in that dress.” He winked and she grinned.  Jenn made a gagging sound as she grinned at the couple and got to work on Kate’s hair. “Seriously, Jenn, this dress is gorgeous.” Chris ran a hand over the forest green fabric of the A-line, deep V-neck dress with a beautiful train and a high slit.

“I thought it would accentuate her hourglass figure and show off her amazing shoulders and legs.” Jenn said. “Seriously, Kate, you have amazing shoulders and legs.”

“Thank you.” Kate said, blushing. “What shoes did you choose?”

“The nude Filamenta strappy Louboutin sandals.” 

“I love you.”

“You get to keep them.”

“Oh my god, marry me?”

Jenn laughed as Chris whipped around. “Um….” He held his hands out in a clear what-the-fuck motion.

“Look, it doesn’t have to be a legal marriage, but Jenn and I are going to have the ceremony.  I need to lock her down for life.”

“I’d be honored, babe.” Jenn said.

“Six months in and she’s already moving on to a second marriage.” Chris muttered playfully.

“Ok, go finish getting dressed out there so I can finish getting your wife ready.”

Thirty minutes later, Kate walked out looking like an old Hollywood goddess.  She had added some baby-lights to her hair recently to make it a tad bit blonder at Jenn’s insistence.  She had been right, of course.  The baby-lights looked really good with her porcelain skin and it really popped with the long beach waves that Jenn had done with her hair tonight.  

Chris let out a long, low whistle when he saw her.  He was holding Madison and looked at the baby with a grin. “Your mom looks gorgeous, huh?”

“I can agree with that assessment.” Helena said, situating her daughter’s train. “But I’ve always thought that.”

Megan walked into the room from Chris’ office. “Good.  We need to get moving.  We’re going to be running late if we don’t leave now.”

“That was my fault.” Kate said. “I wanted to feed Maddie before we left.”

“It’s ok.” Megan made a beeline for the door.

“Mom….”

“We’ll be fine here.” Helena said, taking Madison from Chris. “I’ll see you later.  Have fun.”

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

The premiere for Gifted wasn’t nearly as large as the Civil War premiere.  It was much more chill in comparison.  Kate felt a lot more at ease and she and Chris posed happily together.  The press asked Chris questions about his marriage and baby, even directing questions at Kate herself.  Megan was great at helping Kate navigate the press.  They stood together while Chris took pictures with the cast and director.

“Is that Jenny Slate?” Kate asked Megan.

“In the floral dress, yeah.” Megan confirmed.

“Hmm….”

“What?”

“I’m not a jealous person by nature, but I don’t like how she’s pawing or looking at my husband.” Megan looked a little nervous. “Meg?”

“Before Chris met you, he and Jenny were very flirtatious.”

“Huh.”

“What ‘huh’?”

“Just…. Huh.” Kate never let her smile waver.  She knew the cameras were always watching.

“She’s married.”

“So is he, but that’s not stopping her from trying to flirt with him.”

“She’s not doing anymore press for the movie with him after this.  He’s strictly with McKenna and Octavia.”

“Good.”

Megan grinned at Kate and Kate laughed slightly.  Chris came over and took Kate’s hand.  They finished walking the press line and headed into the theatre. “What were you and Megan talking about?”

“You and Jenny Slate.”

“Really?”

“She said you two were really flirty before we met.”

“Oh.  I mean, I guess, but she’s married.  I wouldn’t ever….”

“I know you wouldn’t.”

“What does that mean?”

“Come on, Chris.  Are you completely blind?  That woman was all over you.”

“For pictures.” Kate rolled her eyes at her husband. “Kat, seriously…. She’s a nice person.”

“I love you, but you are such a dude!”

“What?”

“Chris!” McKenna Grace came bouncing up and tugged on Chris’ arm. “Is this her?” The little girl’s eyes looked up at Kate excitedly.

“Yeah, McKenna, this is Kate.” Chris said with a big smile. “Kate, this is McKenna.”

“I’m so excited to finally meet you!” McKenna wrapped her arms around Kate’s waist. “Chris came back to set and he just couldn’t stop talking about you.  You really are the prettiest!”

Kate laughed. “Thank you!  He told me a lot about you, too.  I’m really excited to see you in the movie.”

“You are?!”

“I am!  Chris couldn’t say enough good things about you.”

“Chris!” McKenna giggled shyly which made Chris laugh. “Kate, you look really pretty.  I love your dress.”

“Thank you so much.  I love your dress, too.  The sparkles are really cool.”

“Thank you!” McKenna’s mother called her over. “I have to go to my mom.  I hope you like the movie.”

“I’m sure I will.  It was lovely to meet you.” McKenna hugged Kate again before running off. “She is just the sweetest thing.”

“So, I’m such a dude?” Chris asked, steering the conversation back to before McKenna came over.

“Yes.  Right now, it means that you’re completely oblivious to the fact that someone is hitting on you.”

“I swear she’s not….”

“She totally was.” Megan said, coming over.

“You’re ganging up on me?”

“Of course we are.  Seriously, Chris, watch out for Jenny.  She’ll get you in trouble.” Chris threw his arms up in defeat. “Ok, let’s head into the theatre.  They’re going to do introductions after the movie.”

As they headed for their assigned seats, Chris looked down at Kate. “I wouldn’t ever pursue her.”

“I know.” Kate said, squeezing his hand. “It’s not you I’m worried about.”

“Do you want me to say something to her?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Chris helped Kate situate her dress as she sat down before he sat beside her. “Are you planning something?”

“Nope.”

“Kat….”

Kate chuckled and leaned over to kiss her husband, running her fingers along his neck in the way she knew he liked.  He shuddered in pleasure and she grinned against his lips.  When they broke apart, Kate directed her gaze right at Jenny as she made her way to the seats behind Chris and Kate.  She gave Kate a tight grin before sitting down.

“That suit really does look amazing on you.” Kate said, adjusting Chris’ tie as she crossed her legs, using the slit to expose one of them from mid-thigh down.

Chris didn’t miss the bare leg.  He reached out and ran his hand along her knee and thigh. “I really love this dress.”

“Me too, but it’s a rental.”

“Can I buy it for you so you can just wear it around the house?”

Kate laughed. “I love you, you big dork.”

“I love you, too.” He leaned over and kissed her again.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

Kate stood with Chris at the afterparty.  McKenna wasn’t there, but the rest of the cast and crew were.  Chris had proudly introduced her to everyone.  Octavia had given Kate the warmest hug and then Kate had promptly expressed her admiration for the actress.  The two women had talked about growing up in the South and even picked on Chris for being a ‘damn Yankee.  He jokingly took offense to that and corrected them by saying he’s a “diehard Red-Sox fan and don’t forget it.”

Chris looked down at his watch. “We need to leave soon if we’re going to make it home to pick up Maddie and head over to Twitch and Allison’s house.”

“Ok.” Kate took a sip of her champagne and set it down on a nearby table. “I need to pee.”

He chuckled. “I’ll be waiting right here.”

When Kate walked out of the bathroom, she rolled her eyes.  Jenny hadn’t come near her or Chris since the movie had ended.  She’d had to watch the couple make doe eyes at each other throughout the film.  Chris had kissed Kate’s hand or temple constantly and wrapped her in his arms when she had cried.  Now Jenny had slunk over when Kate hadn’t been near Chris.

Poor Chris looked super uncomfortable and his eyes brightened when he spotted his wife walking up behind Jenny.  Kate purposely slid between Jenny and her husband, kissing Chris for good measure, and then smiling brightly when he wrapped his arm tightly around her.  She finally turned and acknowledged Jenny.

“Hi, we haven’t met.  I’m Kate Evans, Chris’ wife and the mother of his daughter.” Kate said, not offering her hand.

“I heard you got married, Chris.” Jenny squawked. 

“I did.  We got married in October.”

“I bet you looked so handsome.”

“He did.” Kate snapped.

“My wife looked so much better than I ever could.” Chris said.

“Our daughter kind of stole the show, though.” 

“She did!  That little dress you chose was too cute on her.”

“Thank you, baby.” Kate kissed him quickly. “We need to get going.”

He looked at his watch.“Oh shit!  We do.  I’ll grab Megan and let her know we need the car pulled around.”

“Ok.” Kate watched Chris rush off and she looked at Jenny. “Look, if you’re not happy in your marriage, leave it.  But stay away from my husband.  He’s quite happy in his marriage.”

“I….” Jenny started.

“Save it.  I know about the flirtatious banter before Chris and I met.  I don’t care about that.  I care about you flirting with him now.  I care about you putting your hands on my husband where they don’t belong.”

“Babe!” Chris called, waving her over.

“If you’re not happy, find a way to get happy.  Talk to your husband and stay away from mine.  Have a nice life.” Kate gave Jenny a sarcastic smile as she walked to catch up with Chris.

“What did you say?” Chris asked, wrapping his arm around her waist and glancing at Jenny’s stunned face.

“Oh, I was just giving her some marriage advice.” Kate smiled up at Chris. “I think we’re doing well enough that I can dole some out.” 

He eyed her for a moment, but relented when she kept her smile at him. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, baby.  Now let’s go get our baby and hang out with some new friends!” Kate kissed him as they walked through the exit doors together.

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[junker-town]

My journey to find Puppy Bowl puppies at the Super Bowl

The Super Bowl is big and overwhelming, but at least there will always be puppies.

HOUSTON - I was aimlessly wandering downtown Houston the night before the Super Bowl, because that’s what you do when even emotions feel like work. I walked along the fencing surrounding Super Bowl Live, which is what the NFL called the carnival it threw all week. I didn’t think of going inside until I peeped in and saw that, just past the chainlink, puppies were wrestling on a miniature football field.

I lived in Houston for a week and I wish I could tell you what it was like. Downtown was a Super Bowl playpen that the city doesn’t deserve to be judged on. I drove all over town, but on highways that have right-, left-, and middle-lane exits, and go from five, to three, to four, to two lanes without notice, and induced so much tunnel-eyed anxiety in me that I didn’t really see what surrounded them.

All I know is that Houston seems like a really great place to host a Super Bowl. It’s big and open, and probably has more convention centers per capita than any city in the world. If it were any nicer it might lose what makes it so welcoming. It’s spacious and sprawling enough to fit all of its behemoth boom industries with room to spare. And all that makes it just about perfect for accommodating the sort of party that the NFL likes to throw.

Puppies gave my evening a purpose. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy. I had walked around the area of Super Bowl Live along Avenida de la Americas earlier in the week, and the crowds were heavy even then. They would only be worse on Super Bowl Eve, and I hadn’t realized until then that the setup extended several city blocks deep — the host committee bragged that the area of Super Bowl Live was approximately 13 football fields. To find the puppies, I would need to go to the furthest reach of the pen.

I’m small and squirrel-y, and really good at darting through crowds. When I started in, however, I didn’t know that moving would be physically impossible at times.

I got stuck in the middle of some luminescent Truffula trees. They were very pretty, but tough to enjoy when you’re getting shouldered. I’d say this is where tensions ran highest. It was a thoroughfare. People were either coming or going. Parents dragged overstimulated kids headed towards the exits past young, professional types dressed like Bud Light’s targeted demographic.

***

If your were goal really is to cover the Super Bowl, I’m not sure that going to it is the best idea. The underdogs had never won a championship. Atlanta would have been the best place to document the genuine excitement or anxiety about what could have been the end of a 51-year drought. Or go to Boston and see in real time if even they, America’s most blessed fanbase of this century, doubted Tom Brady when the Patriots were down 25 points in the third quarter.

When you’re at the Super Bowl for a week, the only people you can talk to are the players and coaches, and they don’t always want to talk. Which is fine — they’re preparing for the biggest moments of their careers, doing just about anything else would be more productive for them — but it can sometimes feel like you’re doing the runaround for the runaround’s sake. It’s hard to tell who, exactly, you’re working for.

The Super Bowl is very good at blurring the line between ads and attractions. Past the electric grove are tents — just tents — and what’s in them isn’t really all that clear from the outside, or more sensical when you’re inside.

Here is lady twirling around some ropes. She is not an ad:

Here is a picture of a NASA return pod, which is cool as hell, but also shines a light on Houston’s history as the center of manned space excursions. It’s kind of an ad.

And here is a picture of a bunch of people staring at an architect’s model of the new Texas Medical Center. This is just people staring at an ad.

And that about sums up Super Bowl week: A very long walk looking at things you were never looking for.

***

Super Bowl Live cleared out past the tents. There were food trucks, then a big open lawn and a soundstage at the end of it. Past the wall of sound were just two things: Puppies, and a replica of the James Webb Space Telescope — what will be the most powerful space telescope ever launched.

It was odd seeing the two within a football’s throw each other. One was the embodiment of man’s blind quest to know more about its universe, whatever it may find. The other was its counterargument: Why? At the telescope, a woman handed me a pin and encourage me to take a selfie with it. Here is what that selfie looked like:

The telescope looks an accordion with a space laser attached. It has been in development for more than 20 years. When it launches in 2018, the hope is that it will see the formation of the first galaxies.

Arriving at the Super Bowl feels foreign. It’s like waking up in a new bed for the first time. They hand you new credentials, and have you go through a more rigorous security check, including a full pat-down. Get there early, and you can walk around the service tunnel beneath the stadium and see all the pre-game preparations firsthand. The stadium is free to peruse.

Seeing the field for the first time, empty and calm, is the most arresting moment of the entire week. Some fans took their seats five hours before kickoff. The man in the Julio Jones jersey below paid $2200 for his ticket.

View from the worst seat in the house http://pic.twitter.com/uUx92AncNJ

— Louis Bien (@louisbien) February 5, 2017

He said, “but hey, I’m here.”

The biggest misconception about the Super Bowl is that the crowd is corporate and dull. True, it’s easier to get a ticket if you’re affluent, but the people who attend take the game seriously. Judging by the jerseys, almost no one goes to the game unaffiliated. They’re loud, too.

There’s a sound that you can only hear at a neutral site game. The boos of one half mix with the cheers of another and it creates a din, like the murmurings before the house lights go down before a play BUT EVERYBODY’S YELLING OH WOW THAT DOES SOUND LIKE A COOL PODCAST.

The game passes by quickly in three phases. First, the Patriots and Falcons poke at each other nervously for a quarter and nothing happens. Then the Falcons go up so big that the din quiets down and we all decide that This Is A Boring Game. The third phase begins the first time there is even an idea that the Patriots can come back. There are no sounds during this phase, or even temporal structure. You just emerge on the other side, and realize you’re buzzed.

***

The puppies are part of the Animal Planet Puppy Bowl Experience. It was harder to get up to the glass that surrounded the puppy football field that puppy football gets played on than to get to the front of a Brady press conference scrum. The crowd was much happier, too. Some people were happy and drunk, as you might be if you stopped at every beer stand from the front of Super Bowl Live to the back.

I watched two games of puppy football. The puppies are very bad at scoring points. A man in a Patriots jersey FaceTimed with his son, which begged the question why his son couldn’t come, and why his father hated him so much that he showed him all the puppies he could have been hanging out with. There was a trivia portion where the referee asked “which of the following is an animal mascot in the NFL” and a woman shouted “Bills!”, which was none of the options.

After the games, the puppy handlers would hold the puppies over the glass so that the crowd could pet them. Some of the puppies were be too scared and they got pulled back. The other puppies were indifferent at best but the crowd seized forward to touch them.

I grabbed a soft puppy paw and shook it. His handler told me that his name was Max. He had a button nose and brown eyes, and brown floppy ears. I don’t know his breed but he was fluffy.

[janeorozco92]

Cat Pee Killing My Lawn Super Genius Cool Tips

When the other hand, there are no discharges from ears, eyes, or nose.It is an instinctive and they have been fixed.If for example when they awaken, especially in the cage it cannot see them.To encourage your cat from getting bored.

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Cat Urine Bleach

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