#definitely hasn't spent his whole life having his trauma dismissed by everyone who purports to care about him
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man i love hellblazer. i write ten words about how this man grieves / breaks down emotionally and immediately want to crack my hyoid like a glowstick.
#( ooc. ) OUT OF CIGS.#he's. so emotionally healthy you guys. he's so totally fucking fine#definitely hasn't spent his whole life having his trauma dismissed by everyone who purports to care about him#definitely hasn't had to turn everything that hurts him into a joke so it doesn't become a weakness to be used against him#feels like he Has to look at all the awful details where the occult and the grotesque human intersect because no one else will#and then proceeds to become incontrovertibly linked to those awful intersections simply bc he was There to Witness#wants so badly to hold on to the people he loves but has been taught his whole life that he's poison and shouldn't#wants to live more than anything but can't figure out how to LIVE while he's alive#it's fine. he's fine. it's cool. i'm normal about it#his emotions are wild to me bc he doesn't lock down like your traditional brooding antihero. he's pretty fuckin open about things#he just...has to push past what he's feeling to get the job done. and then everyone assumes it can't have been that bad in the first place#meanwhile his fucking hands are shaking while he tries to light his cigarette#i'm really feeling some kinda way about him tonight lmao
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