#dear god i don't have another two movies from this franchise in me. please don't let them get any worse than this.

[james-stark-the-writer]

Declan O'Brien is a mediocre director, a horrible writer, and fucking hates women. you know those movies that make you want to die with every new scene? this is one of those. every new scene is some awful nightmare and i can't wake up and it won't stop (derogatory). this movie is so creatively bankrupt and misogynistic, it's not worth a full in-depth review.

My ½★ review of Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines on Letterboxd

[its-the-cat-queen]

*flutters down on iridescent wings*

It is me! The Infodump Fairy! I have come to cast a spell upon you that will cause you to ramble for way too long about Trolls! Please, o’ talented one, tell me why this series has captivated you so!

(Ok but seriously I’ve seen your stuff for it (which fucking SLAPS btw) and this is a series I’ve never really been very interested in, so I’m very curious about what draws you to it! Only if you want to share, of course! As you can see, I am not a real fairy and my spells are fake lol)

Oh dear Infodump Fairy! Your spell is taking its effects!

Asfdhgd seriously though, believe me, I have no problem rambling about Trolls all day jvjfjhf. This is not gonna be very coherent, so sorry in advance. 😅 (Also, thank you, I'm so glad you like my work! <3)

Okay so. I've actually been here since the trailer for the first movie came out (I wasn't very active in the fandom back then, though). I was already invested from that moment on, specifically in the two main characters, Poppy and Branch, and their dynamic, who I took one look at and said, "yeah, I ship that" hfjhf. I think what mostly got to me was the characters, the designs, the fact that it's such a fun and colorful world, and of course, the music. The songs are so good! Like, all of them. Yes, they are mostly just covers of already popular songs with some word changes here and there, but my GOD, are they good covers! But anyway, love me a musical with fun characters! Personally, I think all of the characters have deeper issues about them than what you can see on the surface and what you would expect from a children's movie franchise. Like, Branch has so much trauma it really just feels like in every movie they are just trying to give him more and more problems hdkhdjd. Which of course, makes him a pretty compelling character altogether. Do other characters have as deep issues as him? Some of them. But like, they don't really have that much screentime, sadly. While Poppy and Branch are equally important characters in the first movie (and well, in all of the movies, imo), the second movie is what I would dub as "Poppy's Character Development - The Movie" jgkjfjfj. While the first movie operates with the whole "happiness is inside of all of us, we just need someone to help us find it" kinda message (which doesn't fully stick the landing but oh well), the second goes for stuff like differences, equality (of sorts), and tbh some kind of colonialism metaphor?? It also widens the world of trolls as we've known it, as we learn of other tribes of trolls, who are all connected through different kinds of music. So the whole worldbuilding here just makes things even more interesting.

Now the third movie. In the words of youtuber Mann of 1000 Thoughts, it "gives no fucks in all the right ways". Tbh the Trolls timeline has already been questionable, as is, with the Netflix tv shows that came out after the first and second movies, but this just throws another ranch in the system, and says fuck you to the timeline altogether jckbfh. Like, I managed to make it work once I dedicated a good half hour figuring out how Branch's secret long lost brothers who he was in a band with when he was a baby fit into the picture, but it's not perfect even then. There would definitely still be plotholes gkfhfgf. But at this point you just gotta turn your suspension of disbelief on and just go along with it, cuz it is SUCH a fun experience besides all that. (This goes for all the movies btw. Turn your brain off, you're gonna have a great time jfkhf.) Ngl this is the movie that really got me to jump right back into the fandom with full force, and now I'm back to thinking about all of the previous movies as well and appreciating all of the characters. Tbh when I watched the trailer for the third movie, I thought that the whole long lost brothers storyline was the worst idea they have ever come up with, and then I watched the movie and I was like, "fuck this is the best thing ever" gjfgdhd. Idk, we learn enough about Branch's brothers for them to be compelling characters of their own, while we also have a 20 year old gap in which we can pretty much imagine anything into, cuz we don't actually know all the details about how they got to where they are today after the band broke up. Idk, it's like a sandbox you can play in. And that is so much fun. Also, yeah. The music in the third movie also SLAPS! I listened to the soundtrack on loop for a week after watching it jfkhfh.

The humor is also great in all of the movies, in my opinion. I think my humor operates on Trolls standards at this point, which everyone can decide for themselves if it is good or not hkfjfj. I'm having fun so that's all that matters to me.

But yeah, it's just. Idk. It's difficult to pinpoint something very specific that lured me in. Although, I did mention quite some stuff altogether jfkjjf. It's all about the experience for me. The movies are just filled with so much energy, which I love, and they are, in my opinion, the perfect combination of that energy and emotional impact. Are they perfect movies? Absolutely not. But I'm enjoying myself immensely while watching them, and that's l that matters. Soooo yeah. That's about it for now, I've already been talking too long hkfhfjf

Hope some of this made sense, at least jkfjfj. Thank you for the ask <3 You sadly had no idea about the beast you would unleash fjdgdhd.