#cuz i've had things like this before but it's usually a phase

[tethrras]

i have a genuine mental block that has stopped me from writing a lot in the past six months and every time i think it's gotten better it's actually gotten worse and is more and more agonizing. and it's also EMBARRASSINGGGGGG

[milaisreading]

HIIII i love ur posts!!

Can i request a tired or mentally drained and at one point she breaks down on front of the bllk boys and all of them start panicking or trying to comfort her? 😭😅

I've been tired cuz exam season ( >:p ) "and i wanna cry but i physically can't ( idk why? ) and i want some comfort sooooo.... yeah!

if u dont wanna its cool :)

byeeee❤️❤️

Author: I FEEL U! I have been feeling soo drained and useless ever since my exams finished. Literally can't even relax during this small break I got:// Anyways, I hope u like this! Thanks for the request🩷

Warnings: Reader uses she/her. Requests are open

⚽️Blue Lock belongs to Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️

On any normal day (Y/n) didn't mind the chaos the boys caused her, after all they were under a lot of pressure, so she let them unwind while cleaning up after them. But today was not one of those days. Ever since the preparations for the next Blue Lock phase started she felt like they were more and more chaotic, while she was losing herself more and more in all of her work. The whole week was just a whole mess for her, from running errands for Anri and Ego, to breaking up fights between the teammates, she just felt like giving up. Right now, she was enjoying some quiet time in the lunch hall, just drinking some tea while fighting back sleep.

"This morning was so tiring...." She winced while grabbing her stomach. This morning, Rin accidentally kicked the football past the goal, which ended up hitting (Y/n) in the stomach. This caused a loud argument between the captain, Isagi and Barou. (Y/n) tried to stop them, but the fussing coming from Aryu and Hiori stopped her. She was annoyed that they didn't let her handle the issue, instead Kurona and Yukimiya ended up dragging her toward the infirmary.

Next thing that happened was an hour after the first incident. Karasu and Otoya were practicing with Bachira and Aryu, (Y/n) was as usually sitting and taking down the stats of the 4. Nothing unusual. Until Bachira decided to goof around with the football and yell at (Y/n) to watch him do some tricks. She admitted, they were impressive, and she commented on how great they are. Her comments along with the impressed look on her face caused the other three to start doing the same. The problem was that there were 4 of them and (Y/n) would have to look every 2 seconds at a different player, which did make her dizzy. Ego had noticed the commotion and yelled at all 5 of them to get back to training.

The 3rd incident happened barely an hour ago at lunch time. (Y/n) was sitting with Gagamaru, Isagi and Chigiri during the time, and while talking with the 3, she didn't notice an argument between Kunigami and Nagi unfolding. Everyone knew that (Y/n) barely ever ate her dessert, it had too much protein, so she would always left it to one of the players to eat. The dessert was pretty much the highlight of their day and the team agreed on whoever got the most points for the day, will get the sweet treat. This arrangement worked for 2 months, but today was the first time that two players were tied in points.

Kunigami and Nagi were both known to be level headed and somewhat apathetic towards everything, except when it comes to their manager and her attention,  that's when both are pretty much irrational.

"I think you seem to misunderstood me, Nagi. I am getting it today." Kunigami said, sending a tight smile towards the albino.

"And you seemed to have misunderstood me, Kunigami. But that pudding is mine."

"Calm down, you two." Niko rolled his eyes, still mad that he lost this time.

(Y/n), blissfully unaware of that whole agreement, noticed Gagamaru staring at her dessert. Knowing she won't eat it anyways, she decided to give it to him.

"Here. I won't eat. Hope you like strawberry flavor." She said, handing the surprised Gagamaru her food.

Chigiri and Isagi gasped silently. They shortly sent the flustered goalie jealous glares before looking at Kunigami and Nagi, who were staring degers at Gagamaru.

"A-are you sure?" The boy asked as (Y/n) nodded her head, smiling warmly at the boy.

"Of course-"

"Gagamaru, you traitor!" The two flinched and looked in surprise at Nagi.

"Ha?" (Y/n) panicked a little as she saw Kunigami and Nagi glaring at the duo.

"Keep it down, you two." Reo rolled his eyes, earning a nod from Tokimitsu.

"M-maybe we should let Gagamaru have-"

"Shut it, Tokimitsu!" Kunigami and Nagi yelled and then started arguing with Gagamaru. It eventually spread across the whole lunch room, and (Y/n) started twitching a little. Nobody was listening to her as she tried to calm it down. Was it the exhaustion or pure desperation to shut everyone up, but (Y/n) eventually started crying silently. Lost in her own thoughts while crying, she wasn't paying attention to what the rest were saying.

"I am the fastest. The dessert is mine!" Chigiri earned a show from Aryu at that.

"You forget I was in the top3 and I am the one with the better hair."

"Oh, shut up you peasants! You all are beneath me and (Y/n), therefore the pudding is mine."

"Says who? You, Barou? You do not have the charm to be anywhere near (Y/n)."

"Otoya, you cheated on your girlfriends. What makes you think you are worthy?" Yukimiya sighed.

"And what about you, Yukimiya? You are so plain, there is no way she will fall for you. Now me on the other hand-"

"Oh, shut up Karasu. Your charms are below Antarctica's temperatures." Niko groaned.

"I think the cutest one of us should get the pudding. So me-"

"Bachira, that would be me. I am also the ace, so that's just a bonus." Isagi smiled, earning a glare from Rin

"Pipe it down, you two can barely pick up a 2nd language." The captain added in.

"English is hard." The two protested.

"I think the richest one should have a say in the dessert." Reo smirked, earning louder protests.

Tokimitsu shivered a little in fright and looked over at (Y/n), freezing for a moment as he saw her crying.

"What's up, Tokimitsu?" Hiori wondered, one of the few who decided not to argue. Kurona looked over to where Tokimitsu was looking, and his eyes widened in surprise as he saw her crying too. He nudged Hiori.

"Look." Kurona said and the cyan-haired boy looked at (Y/n). He wasted no time and ran to her side, followed by Tokimitsu and Kurona.

"He-hey, don't take it to heart. They are stupid like that." Tokimitsu said as he patted the sobbing girl's back. Kurona and Hiori moved closer, both trying to calm her down, all three felt their hearts breaking as they watched her cry. The room grew slowly quiet too, as the rest looked at (Y/n) in concern and guilt.

"(Y/n)...." Chigiri gulped.

"It's just hard to keep up with you all. You keep arguing and destroying things at times... and it's just hard to keep up... I can usually take it, but I guess today isn't my day." A wave of guilt hit the team as they quickly scrambled for the right words. The last thing they wanted was for their (Y/n) to cry, or worse, contemplate on leaving them.

"Tokimitsu, go and take (Y/n) somewhere quiet to calm down. The rest of you stay here." Rin said, quickly getting unto his captain mode. The rest said nothing, deciding not to make things worse, and they watched with guilt and sadness as (Y/n) got dragged out by Tokimitsu.

"Alright, listen up." Rin spoke up, causing the rest to look at him.

"We need to pull our shit together, unless we want (Y/n) to leave and for some other manager to replace her. The team pretty much shuddered at the idea, there was no way someone will replace her!

"So, what's your idea, captain?" Barou wondered.

"I will tell you, but first... Reo, I need you to do some calls." The billionaire heir raised his eyebrow and slowly nodded his head.

And soo, that was what had happened. (Y/n) ended up crying for about 30 minutes as Tokimitsu stayed around, just in case. The boy was collected and calm, no sign of his previous fidgety demeanor. After she calmed down, she apologized to Tokimitsu for inconveniencing him, but the boy didn't mind.

"If you feel down again, don't be afraid to tell us. We will listen." The boy said with a smile, which calmed her down a lot.

After lunch, she went back to her normal duties, helping the other staff members and the team out. To her surprise, they didn't cause any ruckus, they were calm and friendly. Even Rin, Isagi and Barou stayed away from arguing with each other. Unbeknownst to her, whenever a staff member tried to scold her, Karasu, Aryu and Nagi would send them warning glares. They alone caused them to back off quickly. All in all, the day went pretty well, and (Y/n) felt a lot lighter now. She slowly walked into her bedroom, and stopped at the entrance as she noticed a box on her bed. Slowly walking towards it, she looked at the note on the box and slowly started reading it. (Y/n)'s eyes widened a little as she read it through, realizing that the team sent her this, and her heart melted at the apology they wrote out.

'They are chaotic... but I love them like that.' She smiled and slowly opened the box, only to find various treats that she could only buy outside of Blue Lock's facility, she even got a small (f/c) bear.

'They probably made Reo get this...' She chuckled and plopped on the bed, hugging the bear close to herself.

'I will make it up to them... maybe Teieri-san can help me get them some small gift next week.' She thought, slowly falling asleep.

[mintaikk]

I literally love humanity sm

Me and my sister were watching Young Justice, and as usual, when Vandal Savage came up, we ended up talking about how horryfiying his situation is, which lead to a talk about ancient humans, and yeah.

And even years before modern civilization thousand years ago, Cro Magnons made art and still played with their dogs and still liked shells and cool stones and liked to make instruments. They made cave art and buried their dead (one guy even their dog buried next to them), and they would put their handprints on things, and they would trade and cuddle and just- I almost cried looking at old stuff they did cuz that's all just stuff we do. I'm still emotional over the guy that had their dog buried next to him (THE SCIENTISTS TOOK THE DOG OUT! IK WHY BUT THAT FELT SO DISRESPECTFUL)

And it also got me thinking how literally every culture has a form of art and all that. Even cultures that didn't have a lot of instruments had singing. Drums were/are practically everywhere because they're easy to make, and each culture has specific dances and songs for different events like weddings and parties; even ancient ones.

I've mostly been ranting about Cro Magnons, but even other stuff, too. These hand prints were made by children on the Tibetan Plateu between 169,000 and 226,000 BC, which makes them the oldest fossil records of humans. Obviously, we don't know why they did this, but it shows something. That humans just want to leave a memory of themselves behind, even ancient children. That's so sweet.

Even 40,000 years ago, Cro Magnons had furries (I'm calling them that). Like, they gave human characteristics to animals and that's so cute and I love how we kept this trait today.

Apparently, the bull on the right was for religious regions. Even 40,000 years ago, humans had religion. I love this sm.

I've been mostly talking about Cro Magnons, but I might as well talk about Neanderthals too, because they also fascinate me. From what I've seen, a lot of people see them as brutish and all that (they did commonly cannibalize each other, but so did humans. Ever hear of the Donner party?), but they made ponchos and weaved things and used herbs and cooked; just like us. They buried their bodies and would leave offerings like flowers. They made symbolic art and used fun toys, just like us. And all of this was 50,000 years ago; 40,000 years before modern civilization.

Also, I hate it when people say that humans are naturally mean and selfish because dogs are right there?? Dogs are descended from wolves, and they domesticated them by feeding the hungry wolves that followed their groups. Humans saw a hungry and weak animal and decided to give it food. And you could argue that they were giving them food so they wouldn't attack them (that probably, definitely did happen), but also, canines will make it known when they're not trying to be threatening. They'll he less aggressive and lower their head and of course, they won't harm or harrass you. It's possible that wolves did that at early human settlements, and the humans let them take the food or gave them food. Humans saw a weak animal and decided to give them food, even though, at the time, There'd be no known benifit. And wolves and humans were enemies, so it shows the empathy that humans naturally have. Humans also took in orphaned wolf pups, instead of just letting them die to lower competition. But they saw a suffering animal and helped it. It shoes that humans aren't naturally mean or viscouse; we just act that way to fit the environment that we're in. God, I hate capitalism and hyper individualism.

But yeah. I'm in that edgy phase where I go from "I hate humanity, why are we like this?" To then realizing that I love humans and I like living; I just hate capitalism. Just me venting somewhat, but humans literally thousands of years ago made art and toys just because they could. Cro Magnons made art and sculptures and music just because it was fun and they could. Humans literally make art and all this fun stuff because it's fun and they can! It makes them happy and fulfilled, and they like leaving their mark on things! And things like AI art just feels soulless once you realize that. These people are taking their time to do something they love, but now people are making ai art just to replace it.

And just other things too I guess. Idk about other places but in the US, anything that isn't work isn't seen as something that's valuable, when relaxing and doing something is just as valuable! And if anything, humans 50,000 years ago creating stuff because they can should show that. Find stuff to do that makes you happy, idk, I'm tired and about to cry again bcuz I'm looking at old fossils and found one of two skeletons being found holding each other. Have fun dealing with my sleepy rants.

Tldr; Edgy tumblr teen has her monthly cry over humanity bcuz of Young Justice villain and realizes how much she loves the world; but just hates the circumstances that he is in.

[brainshock-alpha]

a while ago i was tagged by @go-go-devil to answer twenty fic writers' questions... i've been preddy busy so i'm just getting around to it now lol. thanks for thinking of me velvet!

this turned out quite long so i'm gonna do my tags up here -- @boyfrillish @pastryglitch @firethekitty -- as usual participation is voluntary, tagged or not :) do these q's if u think it would be fun. that's all

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

35 (includes users-only works)

2. What is your AO3 wordcount?

146,365, for an average of ~4,182 words per work. but really, it's just like four of my long multichapter works skewing the average that high.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

in a strict present-tense sense, it's just pokemon. i've written for a slightly odd variety of fandoms in the past; anyone curious enough to check will readily observe that i go through fandoms in neatly stratified phases lol. i don't tend to be actively involved in more than one at a time.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Black Box Open (st*rdew valley) - 373

Transfer Point (pokemon bw) - 279

Vital Signs (biosh*ck infinite) - 146

Tidal Lock (hylis) - 107

Moonstruck (hylis) - 93

censoring fandoms so i don't appear in searches (excepting pokemon cuz i'm pretty sure those results are basically unreadable lol). anyway i can't believe vital signs is that high up there lmaooo but everything else seems reasonable

5. Do you respond to comments?

i try to but sometimes it slips my mind and then it's too late to reply without it being weird :( whether i got around to replying or not, i'm grateful to everyone who said sth nice on my stuff 🙏

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

uhhhh honestly i don't get super angsty with my fics, especially not the endings lol. simpley not my style... i guess transfer point ended on a rather bittersweet note. born with a weak heart would have been even more so, if i'd ever finished it.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

on the other hand i also don't write fics with particularly saccharine endings either. it's kinda just, oh this is pleasant/cute/hopeful :) i wouldn't say there's a clear winner.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

so far, any haters have kept their thoughts to themselves, which is good. i suppose my writing is usually quite benign anyway lol

9. Do you write smut? If so, which kind?

i have a few unfinished drafts lying around but i've never published anything. (unless you count that one with piers/emmet? it's nsfw for sure but i think you'd be setting the wrong expectations if u called it smut lol.) anyway i'm not terribly interested in going into detail here.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve ever written?

again, i've attempted to draft some in the past but never got close to finishing any of them. i think i'm more likely to draw a weird crossover than write one :p

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

i've uhhhh translated my own fic once??? i guess that counts but i wouldn't say i did a good job LOL -- i'd written a supershort 200-word thing in both english and scots, and i haven't studied scots all that extensively. but it was fun to try, and somehow the scots version got more attention than the english one lol

anyway, if anyone's ever interested in translating my works, feel free to reach out! i'd be happy to help out by answering questions/clarifying meaning/etc :)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nop! it's not really something i've ever considered, but i suppose in theory i'd be open to trying it.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

god i can't give just one answer to an all-time favorite anything LOL. uhhh deduswayne still has a special place in my heart; the autistic jock/autistic nerd dynamic i gave them was so fresh and fun to me... i love raileon despite not ever really writing it ooooops... and then griebold is my newest interest, which is quite funny since raileon is one of the most popular pokemon ships on ao3 but griebold is so unheard of that i'm literally the only person to have posted an english-language work for it there lmfao

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

probably... the bede&hop post-canon qpr fic... i really would love to write a qpr (as well as non-romantic relationship drama in general) but it's another sprawling multichapter thing and idk if i have it in me :^(

16. What are your writing strengths?

dialogue and character dynamics hehe... that's what's most fun for me to write too. i also like to believe i'm good at writing a ship without losing sight of the individual chars involved. and i'm pretty good with spelling and grammar, contrary to what my casual fucking around on tumblr posts may imply LOL. i may not always write in the clearest or most beautiful way, but by god that syntax is solid

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

description lol. i am not a poet by any means; i think it will not surprise anyone to know i did better in linguistics classes than in english.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

do it if 1) you're able to put in the effort and 2) it makes sense to do it. on point 1, i don't think there's anything wrong with saying that chars are speaking in another language but rendering the actual written dialogue in english (or whatever ur mother tongue may be), especially if it's not a language ur fluent in. of course it's good to do research for ur writing but language learning is hard, doubly so if ur trying to write those chars speaking casually. cuz you can't really pick that up from reference texts, or maybe you can but it comes out sounding odd and unnatural. (think of how easy it is to mess up english slang/colloquialisms.) BUT you know, perfect is the enemy of good, and if ur willing to give it the ol college try then i really think it'll help ur foreign-lang-speaking chars feel more alive.

on point 2, i'm mostly thinking of the context of multilingual chars, which adds another layer of complexity. this old post will give u an idea of what i mean. if you're monolingual and mostly only interact with other monolinguals, you may find it difficult to write bilinguals believably. i suggest looking up info on code-switching and, more generally, language learning and bilingualism. (and also heritage languages, which fall under bilingualism but have their own specific features.) again, this is pretty demanding stuff and i wouldn't blame you for just sticking to english dialogue, but i do think it's worth a shot.

have i tried this myself? yes, most prominently in the day to end all days, and also a bit in my other swsh fics... oh yeah, i guess i also made siebold use quebec french swears lol. mind you, i'm under no illusion that i write it well. no one has told me yet that i'm fucking it up, but also no one's told me i'm doing a good job either lol. so idkkkkk

19. First fandom you wrote for?

st*rdew valley... i loved that game so much that it motivated me to start making fanfics and fanart haha. i started posting black box open about eight years ago, which if you'll recall is the fic i have the most kudos on. it was all downhill from there buddy!!!!!!!!!!! lol i'm just kidding, i really just tend not to write for popular fandoms is the thing (or when a fandom is at its most popular)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

honestly it's usually just Whichever Fic I Posted Most Recently lmao. i guess that's not bad, that means i feel like i improve with every story or w/e. i'm still really attached to the day to end all days, though. it's not finished yet (and won't be for quite some time) but it has the most involved plot yet out of all my fics, and it explores some really interesting character spaces too.

[g-gurokisses]

ive been okay !!! truly lots of changes :P .. i found someone that actually likes me as much as i like him lol. we spend all our time together,, we both get jealous when we hang out w our friends but its okay cuz we js call right after. its like finally i am not the only one doing the obsessing..

its so nice it doesnt even feel like im obsessed!!! cuz so is he :P. at first i thought it wld just fade on his end as it usually does, and then i thought id feel smothered and want him gone but.. its been like four months i think and were still the same.

the only thing i wld change is if i could just finally make it Oficial lol. but, im waiting for certain things to fall into place for that first. still cant wait tho :3

i like him so much.. i love him So much. its funny, ive never met someone so normal yet so weird. he gets everything i say but he doesnt get it like i do,, but he gets it in a way nobody ever has before. he gets me,, its like he knows me yk?. i hope we get far, i dont ever wanna be away from him.

– く⁠コ⁠:⁠彡

Thank you for sharing this with me!!

Oh this is wonderful, just wonderful!! I'm so happy to hear that my dear! Success stories are always the best part of this blog! This truly warms my heart ♡

Doesn't it feel amazing to finally feel loved and understood, even when you thought you'd never get love? It's amazing!! And I hope anyone who reads this realizes that time and patience will get you far, everyone finds someone eventually!!

Frankly I also had my phase where I thought I was unlovable, or that relationships weren't for me. I even thought, for a moment, that friendships could replace relationships! People who have been following me for a while and read my posts a lot might remember that... Quite embarrassing when I look back now! Tehehehe~

Now of course, that might very much be the case for some, and there's nothing wrong with that, but for yearning and love-filled people like me that just doesn't cut it!

Now you know what it's like to have someone who genuinely loves you! Someone who needs you and is infatuated just like you! My dear beloved and I are often too much for the average person, but we're perfect for each other. I've never had someone be exactly what I wanted like that, and I'm guessing you feel the same!!

That is to say, I'm so happy for you!!! And I wish you both the absolute best, even tho I already know you're starting off by a great start!! I can sense this relationship will do wonders for you.

And for the rest of my dear lovely readers, don't give up! Know your worth, know how much your love is valuable and NEVER settle for someone who underappreciates you. Communication is key, but if you ever feel unwanted and unloved and talking doesn't work; Please, put yourself first. You don't owe anyone anything, and that inclues you too.

As someone who was stuck in a tiring and unreciprocated friendship for years, I regret not realizing how little that person cared about me.

Remember, the right person will never make you feel inadequate!!

But most importantly, remember that I LOVE YOU~ ♡♡

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Wifey comes home today and the dogs don't know it so they officially hit peak wretched baby behavior yesterday and have slumped into depressed baby behavior today. I do have work today but it's my short day so I'm thinking after I'm done with work and before I head to the airport with doggos to pick up wifey, I'll wash dishes and dogs.

That way wifey doesn't feel like the house is exactly as she left it you know? I definitely know it's not in worse shape I was very careful to always clean up my presence, but I want her to not have to clean up things that were here a week ago when she left either cuz that sucks and just because I was busy and had a hard time getting around to them shouldn't make them her problem. Most things like that aren't a big deal, or are things we specifically planned for (e.g. she emptied the litterbox right before she left and it's self cleaning so it only needs to be done once a week) but the dishes were a fluke that snuck by us in the last couple days before she left and then I literally never once had the spoons to get to them (heh) while Wifey was gone. Which I expected! I kinda figured that I would either do them all on Friday or maybe if I was very lucky do 1 round a dayon the others. So at least I'm on schedule lol.

Anyway, I did also clean the tub this week, and pick up the laundry in the bathroom, so I figure I might also do a quick wipe down in bathroom (sink, toilet, tub, sweep floors, take out trask) since it usually only takes 15 minutes and would make the whole room look really nice at this point. That plus shiny dishes and dogs is bound to make wifey happy coming home.

Anyway, my morning plans are as follows:

throw chili in the crock pot for dinner tonight

maintenance clean of bathroom

first round of dishes

take out the bedroom and bathroom trashes

refill pet water fountains

Extra Credit: unpack the monthly grocery grocery delivery and confirm their allergen listings

So far I'm over 100% on my tasks today and feeling great about it!

In the next hour I've got some work tasks to do, a little documentation stuff to prep for the day basically, and then it's off the the races for my short day with clients, my one on one, and then me getting the dogs ready for the evening!

Managed to finish all of my work prep stuff even the thing I was sure I wouldn't manage! So yay to that! We're still at "all essential AND all extra credit tasks completed" for each phase of my day so far, though obviously I'm not gonna elaborate on the work stuff for privacy reasons.

Feeling good about the day, feeling good about my ability to get shit down now that I've been back on my meds for a week, feeling pretty good overall! I do think I might be headed for a no show today but I'm fine with that because it'll just give me an extra 45 min for dishes and one less note to write before I switch over to household tasks this afternoon.

I am contemplating doing an extra credit task of throwing on new sheets and remaking the bed fresh and clean for wifey since Jaxxine crunched her yams all over this one all week on top of chewing on the fitted sheet like a pacifier to calm herself lol. But we'll see how that goes.

I've managed to get both blankets into the wash, and the quilt is already in the dryer, so I figure I'm definitely remaking the bed now. I'm most of the way through the tough jobs and then all that's left is the easy or fun ones. I do have to leave in about 3 hours tho, so I'm definitely running low on time. Gotta prioritize a bit and wittle down my remaining tasks. Dinner's all set but for some rice if we decide to make it. I may just empty the dish rack and not worry about washing a 3rd load unless I finish everything else in time. Jaxx definitely needs a bath next, then the tub a wipe down, the pets fed, and me a shower. At that point we're likely to be ok the edge of time so I'm thinking remake the bed and then kitty fun den and then prep the dogs for our trip.

After work plans are as follows:

2-3 more rounds of dishes 1 more round of dishes

bathe the lassie (START WITH THE LAD)

Feed the dogs dinner

bathe self

wipe down tub

build kitty fun den with dinner and treats

pick up wifey from her trip

Extra Credit: wash the blankets dry the blankets

Extra Credit: remake the bed with fresh sheets and blankets

[chocolate-failure]

Man, the shrink has been so fucking hard like goddamn. I feel like my resolve can only last week or I go too hard and get sick and gain a bunch of weight back. And I don't think it's due to Ed though I suppose it could be. But I'll get an HS flare or covid flare and can't get out of bed. A couple of those days in a row followed by my period really fuck up my progress. It's like every week there's a fucking crisis and I just don't have the energy to keep at it or I'll have one day where I gain weight in the tub. Like of course I have times where I just overeat or overdrink during the night but a lot of the issue has been being sick because I can always purge, I can't keep however make up for a day where I can't hit the gym or do my extra long baths.

I usually lose about 2 pounds in 2 hours of bathing but if the water is real hot like at hotels I can lose 3 or 4 in the same amount of time. I refuse to do cold baths even though I know they help with weight too. There's just something's I can't give up and my comfort in the bath is one of them.. and having the water scalding hot isn't necessarily comfortable 🥴

But yeah progress has been fucked up mostly because I'm having a hard time acclimating with changes from week to week as far as my physical health goes. It sucks.

I also had a migraine last week (prob Feb 22 or smn) which is the reason why I'm making this entry. I don't have a lot of insight into my triggers or well... When my triggers become an issue. I definitely know what they are with humidity and heat exhaustion being the biggest one but I've gotten migraines after a 2hr walk and not gotten one after a 5hr walk where I'm on the brink of passing out and lost several pounds. Idk what conditiins must be in place along with the heat exhaustion for it to culminate in a migraine. I've had a flash from a camera cause a migraine but have had several encounters with flashing cameras that resulted in nothing. I once ate one of those Louisiana sandwiches with olives in it and got a migraine almost immediately after it but I've eaten olives several times and never got sick. So I end up for the most part not really avoiding my triggers because they more often result in nothing than a migraine. But I still have 2 or 3 a year.

So instead of concentrating on my triggers I try to minimize stress because it feels like that's a common denominator for a lot of my ailments. And the next best thing for migraine management after tigger avoidance is early detection which is only marginally more trackable to me. Unlike some diseases show the symptoms of migraine mean the migraine is happening. Once the symptoms start there's nothing you can do to stop it. You can take meds to take some of the edge off but it's not going away.

A hallmark symptom of the prodrome phase is jamais vu, the opposite of deja vu which just means the world you've come to know feels unfamiliar rather than feeling like you've been here before. But of course this is very similar to dissociation, an experience I have in some capacity nearly all the time. So it's hard for me to discern the difference between premigraine jamais vu and my daily experience of jamais vu. I also experience the confusion and agitation but those things happen directly before the blindness and aura which isn't particularly helpful for predicting a migraine cuz like when I say directly I mean the pain will start within the next minute or so. As the aura expands the headache gets worse but once it's done the headache typically doesn't get worse from that point. Sometimes it's debilitating whole other times it's a dull ache. The headache hat and exposure to cold is helpful. Pain meds are a little helpful if I take them early enough.

[fandxmslxt69]

hello beloved!!! <3

13, 18, 26

oh my gosh my love!!! hello dearest <333

13. How many siblings do you have? Are you oldest, middle, or youngest?

UGHHHH. Lmao. Uuuh I have 3 siblings, two brothers and a sister- I'm the oldest!!! Tough tough job let me tell you. It's fun I guess, because I've got dirt on everyone and I'm one less for my parents to worry about. But it's also kinda tragic cuz I feel held to such a standard my siblings see me as enemy #1 because I "get everything I want". I mean YEAH I more or less do but consider: my work really hard to collect enough Parent Points to get my stuff soooo really it's their fault :/ NOT TO SOUND DRAMATIC but its also kinda tragic cuz like between me and my younger sister is nearly a whole lifetime. My youngest brother is in that horrible middle school boy phase, and the older one is so distant I think he'll ditch the family as soon as he can. Also- lmao the anger issues that run in this household!!!

ANYWAY THIS GOT OFF TOPIC (love chatting abt sibling dynamics) but yeah, 3 siblings, I'm the oldest, it's such a blast I would not trade this life for anything.

18. What's the most expensive thing you've ever bought?

Stares at my bookshelf that has over 3k dollars worth of books. uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hmmmmm. I mean, other than my books, my mom usually buys me most of my stuff. Like no yeah sure I go clothes shopping but she's always there cuz a) i cant make choices and b) i cant be trusted with a credit card and c) i dont have my own money ahahaha. So ummm yeah, most expensive thing has to be my books (bought a book once for 30 bucks.) or my computer/laptop/thing (200 bucks, but it was my dad who got it sooooo) I mean I have clothes that were rather expensive like coats and shoes, but I never bought that stuff with my own money (has never worked a real job in her life other than library tutoring) so my books are the #1 i guess.

26. Do you believe in second chances?

Hm. If it's an honest, little mistake, sure. But if it's something bigger? My pride won't let me. My mom drilled it into me pretty young. Funny enough I got pushed around pretty easily growing up, and I didn't really know how to say no (most of that was due to being thrown into an environment in which i a) could not speak nor understand the language and b) i was. well. Not White and thought I had to appease everyone so no one could pick on me). Anyway yeah my mom drilled it into me that second chances had to be earned and only for the right things. STORY TIME!!! Gosh oh gosh okay, so I got pushed back a couple years in school when we first moved to Canada, hence why I'm so behind on everything. When I (finally) hit 5th grade, I remember I made 2 good friends. One of them, my parents were friends with her parents, the other was this nice white girl whom friend A had known for a very long time. I was kindly invited into their group (I'd known them for about a year or so but was never very close) and I tagged along! It wasnt unusual, since we lived in a small area and went to the local school, so pretty much the entire grade knew each other and we (the 20 smth kids) were always in the same class together for a solid 3 years. Anyway, these girls were fun and we had a good time but shit went DOWN and it kind of fucked me up real bad. I still think abt it to this day. Long story short they spread shit abt people in their little diaries and the teachers caught them and they thought I was apart of it but TURNS OUT I was the CENTER of the shit talking and to this DAY, nearly a decade later, my parents refuse to tell me about any of it. I gave them quite a few chances before and after bc we had some fights, and in the end it like just. it humiliated me completely. Anyway lmao um um um yeah, ever since that shit I kind of stuck to avoiding second chances.

If it's not deserved, it's not happening. They're cut from my life immediately. I simply refused to let myself be put in that same vulnerable position again. So no, I don't really believe in second chances. If it was an honest mistake, a misunderstanding, miscommunication or something harmless, I'm okay. It's fine, it'll wash over. But most other shit? Man I can't handle it at ALL. My pride genuinely won't let me. I'll end up burning all the bridges in anger before I even consider it.

UMMM THAT WAS LONG WOW but im tired and idc anymore. WHOOPS

THANKS FOR THE ASK AMPHI i love you :D

[the-firebird69]

This is very tiring work these people make it tiring when they're using up their armies doing it and I have to admit it they're very angering the sit there and make you angry all day long and ignore the price. Tonight we're going to try and teach them and expressing what the prices and see if they learn that is very expensive to do what they're doing. I've had it with most of them here and the sitting there cackling and making faces also strange things and they're losing everything and I guess they're not small enough to know it yet they think they have the islands and they'll win everything he says to me Garth it's like them oh really he said they're like Garth and that they're poor and they used to being poor true too Trump was only coming into power and powerful for about 50 years before that he was a nobody for a long time and he's comfortable being that he's going to get away with hurting our son because he's becoming a nobody and he gets treated like a nobody is not there yet pretty soon he will be. I'm starting to see what you're saying you say you just came up with the analogy but we do know about it and he says there's a break even point and all this stuff and our son says doing something to me or kidnapping me has never done anything for any of you, it's only put you in ruins perfect example of Zang that's Tommy the f and he started to be exposed to the Chinese another new about him and they tried to get people to go after him without knowing who and what he was and that's the kind of stuff you're doing Trump he says and Trump says whatever but he is a dead man anyways is inside his Grandpa's body because the guy who they're fighting put him in there and he's fighting the guy because the guy is having him do it he had the objects that they went in to get for themselves and that's what the clones were up to although they're not as powerful as they used to be and they can't see it either and it's now the max who are doing it and foreign is kind of know about it so they look awful and that guy looks like a complete dick cuz he usually does doesn't matter what is inside he has the same stupid looks on his face. And yeah he's very stupid so you don't understand that we have troops on duty 24/7 he doesn't know a lot of stuff about practically anything has been cleaned out a bunch of times and several other wild cards to make sure they don't get up and start hurting and trying getting all sorts of big stuff by doing huge explosions that's what they're up to in these movies and stone does it all the time s it all the time. And he fights someone as a hologram and is completely incinerated on Skellig. And it has to do with this history there and people don't like him in Ireland and newada Ariana want him out and her son wants him to stop sticking to him saying is his buddy little a******. We have a lot more to do and we have a lot of work and it's going to take some time to get it done and energy and concentration we have to come up with better solutions still we are building bases but there's a whole bunch of people in the way and ships and all sorts of dumb things and we don't have time for all this crap

-we spent a lot of time complaining about these idiots and others want us to we get work done and stuff but they still want us to waste time and they want to waste my time and I'm going to put a Time study down

-we're moving into another phase here and it is going on that they are being displaced and McDonald's are moving down and Stan and Biden I just got as fast and not in huge droves the max are trying to get the stuff but really the morlock of going after Stan and pretty heavily they are seeking his people out at his areas and at the filling stations for the ships and it is a nightmare for him he is getting beat up he's thinking of moving down here and putting up a defense as Mac Daddy is and trying to use the foreigners to keep the neck shield out the Mac shield they talked about putting the shield on the islands and they said no so the question is what happens to their shield and this question came up about Georgia and Alabama and they start thinking about Alabama as a potential place and to put their Shields there and they're going ahead and trying to do it shortly that's what they said but right now there's a large amount of morlock trying to get in still but down here the housing situation has changed and we're going to talk about the moment

Thor Freya

Zues Hera

Olympus

[dolljunk]

So it's been awhile since I've tried doing a doll duplication but with my Alice phase I've wanted to finally tackle a project I've wanted to do since 2011. When the 2011 Designer Alice in Wonderland doll released, I really loved how it changed up the Snow White face sculpt, which at that point I had written off cuz I didn't like the character. But it made me appreciate the Snow White sculpt in a way I didn't before.

Anyway I didn't get around to doing this custom because of one thing or another but I'm glad I did finally because I really liked how the 17 inch Alice doll looked but there was no way I would own one myself. She's rerooted with Honey Blonde saran from @CustomDollHairAU.

This was challenging because the 17inch Snow White head is slightly different to the 11inch Snow White and I had to compensate at a few areas like her lips and eyes. I also had to slightly adjust a few things cuz the 17 inch Alice has a wonky eyebrow and other paint issues no one but my nitpicky self would pick up on.

Doing a dupe on a face up is always a fun exercise for me cuz it forces me to confront the fact that I can fall into a customizing rut with how I do doll faces. Like this Alice face has very strange eyebrows and the way the eye shines are placed are something I wouldn't do out of my own volition but I do like how they look on this doll.

Also doing this face was interesting cuz I had to go out of my usual method of doing a mid tone, doing white, then black and working my way back to mid tones. For this though, I ended up using flatter colours with defined tones and I used them a lot earlier in the process to replicate the factory look.

I'll get around to curling her hair eventually but I am happy with how she looks.

[tepre]

What did you study at uni, and did you love it, and if you didn't love it, what would you have loved to study instead, and have you ever been in love, is first love as ground breaking as everyone claims it is, because I've never been in love and I'm 20, but my younger brother has, and the girl he loved left him and he was crying all over our video chat every time we video chatted. Wet chats. And I thought it very dramatic so now I'm wondering if first love is as dramatic as that for everyone.

SO this ask is poetry and thank you for it

I studied literature, and I DID love it, I loved it a lot, and I still do, and like with most things you love I also see its flaws and have a tendency to talk about those flaws more than I talk about the wonder of it. But I chose literature--and, like, really CHOSE cuz I don’t come from a background that made it easy to get into uni or made it a clear-cut choice so I definitely scrabbled my way into that building like an urchin into the back of a candy factory--cuz I think stories are the most powerful tool to tell ourselves something ABOUT ourselves, and to make us understand something in that way that feels like we’ve ALWAYS known it but never knew how to word it, and I still believe that to this day. 

I have been in love, ugh, gross. I first fell in love when I was 23, and it was absolutely HORRIBLE and I would NOT recommend love to anyone, 1,5 stars, would not go again. Only I would, and did, fall in love again that is, and then it was awful in another way, and okay here’s what I have to say about that: 

sometimes we get so used to thinking of love as pain that we don't recognise it when it comes in a different form. I have a friend who was dating this guy for a while and said, ‘Oh but it’s so boring’ because he liked her back. I have another friend who, 5 years into a relationship, was suddenly afraid that she’d made a mistake because they’d never had the ‘crying dying dramatically in love’ phase and what if that means that their thing isn’t the real thing? I also have a friend who fell in love with his best friend when they were 13 and then they had to keep their relationship secret for the whole of their teens and then when they were 20 move to another country to get married and anyway, they’re like 40 now, and have been married and settled for forever and when you ask them about it the drama and infatuation and is so distant, and my friend is like, “ugh tell me about your love life I want to live VICARIOUSLY THROUGH YOU” and I’m like......you want to hear how I went on a date and she thought I was someone else she’d been chatting with and then only talked about her ex, and then we both went home before nine and I spent the rest of the night reading fanfic and sending sad voicenotes to my sister?? Like dude, your love life is THE MOST ROMANTIC SHIT EVER, and you want to hear ABOUT MY--

anyway point is there is no script, there’s only how you feel. Sometimes love will make you want to throw up (this is usually unrequited and not great). Sometimes it’ll make you cry because you don’t know how else to leak your emotions. Sometimes it’ll creep up on you, 3 years into a friendship, because you had a dream about them where they wanted to dance with you you and then held you close. Sometimes it’s not romantic at all but still the heaviest thing you’ve ever held. Sometimes it’s just a platonic friendship that goes on for fucking ever. 

The good news is, when you need to know, you’ll know. And I don’t think people talk about this enough, because they want romantic love to be this end-all of ALL loves and for your significant other to be the only source of nutrition (emotionally, physically, all of it), but: we know love long before it’s romantic, or sexual, or any of that. Sometimes we know it from family, chosen or not. Sometimes it’s from friends, or siblings, or that book we read in 2nd grade that’s stuck with us always. I remember the first time my baby sister hugged me when she found me crying over bad grades or whatever, and sat by me and hugged me, and like. She was barely 5?? And that’s LOVE. How it sits in your heart, and how it hurts even though it’s comfort? And of course romantic love comes with other elements and complications and gross ugh insecurities, but I guess what I’m trying to say is: 

if you’re afraid that you don’t know it, or won’t know it, or won’t be able to recognise it--I can tell you that I think you do know it. And when you need to recognise it in your own life, you will. And that there’s a good chance it’ll be dramatic, but also might not be at all. I’ve fallen in love like a ton of fucking bricks and I also have fallen in love really fucking slowly and I have also fallen in love and realised it only in retrospect. It’s all kind of great and awful. I wouldn’t do it again but I’d love to do it again, like, tomorrow. Ugh. UGH

HAHA HOPE THIS HELPED?? 

THANKS AGAIN FOR THIS ASK IT’S MADE MY DAY 

❤️!

[l1ana]

Imagine you and Spiderman being like Adrien and Bridget from ML

Summary: Incase y'all don't know wtf this prompt is— Basically it's [Name] with a crazy crush on Peter but he's either totally oblivious to it, un-purposefully ignore her, or is focusing on another girl. Meanwhile, he -as both spiderman and peter- completely falls in love with her hero alter ego albeit she shows no interest in Spiderman whatsoever. I got this idea after watching a bit of the Miraculous Ladybug original concept video and just had a sort of breakthrough. Anyways, on with the story.

———

“Hey, Peter...” You scrambled to navigate through the sea of fellow classmen, desperate to catch up to your object of interest. He just wasn't hearing you, and that deeply plummeted your mood. Before you knew it, he was gone— Disappearing into the crowd probably never to be seen again until lunch classes.

Peter Parker, biggest geek in highschool. Always bullied, always harassed in ways you thought were impossible. He seemed like the type to keep his head low and live an honest normal life, but little did anyone have clue on about his contrasting alter ego— Spiderman. As said hero of Queens, Peter could do everything he couldn't do as an average teenager. Who knew red and blue spandex was the key to becoming famous?

You sighed as thoughts of Peter bubbled into your head and revolved without signs of stopping. His nerdish and oh-so dorky quirks were the center of your attention aside from his baby face. Not to admit it, but you were in love with the charmer like a mad puppy. But the thing is— He never took notice of you. Hell, he probably doesn't even know that you exist. The only time you two ever met gazes was during class switches, before school, in the middle of lunch, or after school. Other than that, you were a ghost pretty much.

Today was no different from the rest; besides there being the fact that a pair of tickets were in your left hands hold. They crumpled up when your grip increased tenfold, tears threatening to pour down your eyes. ‘This is so unfair.’ You thought to yourself. ‘Why is it that whenever I try to start something with him... Fate just doesn't allow it?’ Your heart fell heavy into your chest. People would call you callow or petty for thinking what you did, but the thing of the matter is that your crush has been the same since elementary school years and continued from there. There was no doubt in your mind that Peter Parker was the one for you.

But, then again, he doesn't even know who you are.

Thankfully, you had a way to change that.

“Hey, Peter!” This morning, you wasted no time in dashing and shoving anyone who dared to get in your way out of eyesight and tracked the chocolate haired boy to a more secluded part of the hallways. The both of you were panting a bit, tired from all of the post-exercise. “P-Peter... Parker...” You breathed out, hands on your knees. “I am... I'm...” Before you could continue on and let him know who you were, the bell rang. Whoopdy-effing-doo. Oh how you wanted to pummel your bad luck into a pulp. “Sorry, I gotta go... Maybe later?” He cringed a bit, aware of how inconsiderate he was being towards you.

With those words left in his wake on your mind, he hurried off to his next class. It took some moments to pass by until a more than visible red hue formed on your face in a horitonzal fashion. Your pair of hands raised to slap your cheeks and squish them in multiple different ways, meanwhile you wore the most lovesick expression you swore you could make without seeming like you were on drugs.

‘Maybe later, he said..’ You recited his words in your head over and over like a song. Small yelps and cheers of joy escaped your lips as the thought didn't cease to fade away. Step one to getting acknowledged was complete. Now if only you could—

“[Name], there's a robbery down at the city bank.” A robotisized voice rang through your left ear. You sighed heavily. “Uggghh. That's not my problem, Stein. Let the police handle it.” Your hand waved through the air. “It seems to be another one of Electro's heists.” “.... UGGGGHHH.” Getting to the city and back would put your last two periods to waste no doubt and you'd also lose a chance to go out and establish a bond with the apple of your eye. But after hearing that Electro was involved, you found that there was no other choice but to go out and do this. Besides, the cops wouldn't stand a chance against him.

‘I'm sorry Peter, you'll have to talk to me sometime later.’ You silently apologized to your crush in your mind, hoping that he would telepathically get your message. Afterwards, you ran into the nearest bathroom and then was seen jumping out the window into the street, except your attire had changed completely. Instead of being dressed down in the usual ‘[Name] wear’, a skin-tight bodysuit overtook you, a half of a face mask covering your face whilst a horn headband was slapped atop of your shimmering hair.

You hopped and skipped from building to building, the voice in your left earring continuing to speak. “There seems to be several hostages under his clutches. He seems to be anticipating the arrival of somebody... My bet is on you, [Name].” He hypothesized. “Oh put a damn sock in it.” You huffed.

After a few more leaps into the air, you skidded off the edge of a shop building and landed directly in the open circle of crowding people. They had instantly moved out of your way at your arrival, going into a state of indistinctive chattering. “I-It's Queen!” A man exclaimed, noticing you right away as you began to talk to a nearby police officer to get the scoop on what's going on.

Queen— Your alter ego hero self, affiliated with the avengers as a late bloomer type. Your powers consisted of shifting into anything solid along with a side of light generation from your hands. The shifting part of your ability allowed you to increase the speed of your cells, making your body seem as though it were gas, and slipping through solids without a problem. The other part is self-explanatory. To be quite frank, Queen was a alias that your supporting fans had made and you just went along with it, that name eventually sticking to you like glue and becoming your permanent hero name. Funny thing, really, cuz you were the Queen of Queens New York.

“I see,” You nodded at the information the cop divulged with you. “Thank you. Now please, stand back, it may get too hectic alright?” At your words the cop nodded, giving orders to back the people who crowded the front of the bank up. You jumped onto the top of the building, holding your breath and phasing through the roof. It took naught but a few seconds later for you to be landing perfectly on your feet, an all-too familiar laugh echoing from far away. The floors were wet. Oh how you've been through this song and dance one too many times before. “Stein, I need a heat signature scan all around if you don't mind.” You whispered into your earpiece.

“7 of them, each of them with their pulses fulctuating at rapid speeds.” The AI spoke. “He must've already pulled a stunt on them before the police arrived.” The first priority before moving on to Electro was to evacuate the premises of any remaininf victims. And that's exactly what you did. It was hard since most of them were all in different and difficult to reach places of the bank but the number was instantly knocked down to one left.

You scratched your head and thought aloud. “Where's the last one at...?”

“You mean, this body right here?” A menacing cackle interrupted, you turning your direction to whence it came from only to witness Electro standing a few feet away from you, hostage in a chokehold on his left arm. In the other arm was the occasional sack of cash that you were sure he wouldn't get away with. Your eyes rolled, unintentionally getting a glimpse of a familiar spandex wearing hero. He was new and all. Round of applause everyone, for the one and only Spiderman.

When he saw that you were staring directly at him, he waved, then making various hand motions that you somehow in god understood. Basically he was going to shoot a string of web at the hostage and hoist them up, stealing them from Electros grip and giving you chance to take the preemptive and just go wild— But also take caution into not destroying the place.

As Electro went on and on with his planned monologue, Spiderman used the chance for when his eyes were closed to not only shoot some web in his face as a stunning effect, but also managed to snag the hostage in one fell swoop. Two birds with one stone— Neat. “What is this substance on my face!?” Electro screamed, trying to claw it off but to no avail. You laughed at this scene. For some reason, Spiderman had the oddest feeling that he had recognized your voice from somewhere. After the fit of chuckles faded, you made sure to give your target such a hard two-piece, that Spiderman swore he saw some teeth flew out of his mouth.

‘Whoa...’ Was the only thing that crossed his mind. Despite your petite figure, you were strong enough to knock a grown man unconscious with just one slug? “You can take it from here, Spider-guy. I've got better things to do besides turning him in. You can do that on my behalf, right?” You yawned, making your way towards the south exit, away from the mob. “O-of course, miss Queen!” He hopped off the ceiling and landed to the ground, ensuring to web the now knocked out cold ‘threat’ up real good and give the police to bust in finally. Once they did, he trailed right after where he saw you leave, only to catch you flipping and twirling in the air with such haste.

Even behind the mask anyone could see the smile forming as his eyes lit up just from seeing you. Needless to say here, but he was all over you. A complete and utter fanboy who joined the wave after witnessing some viral videos of you committing deeds that he would usually perform.

“H-hey, wait up!” He called after you, tailing the direction you went. “Huh?” Feeling that call be directed to you, your head clocked round to see the same spiderboy from before, flipping onto a pipe in front of you. “Oh, you again.” Your expression deflated a slight bit at his presence. “What is it?” You asked, hoping to get him out of your hair quickly. “Oh, well, I-I, uhm...” He stammered over his words, taking in the beauty of yourself in whole as something to beheld. “Queen, your last period is almost closing. Be sure to wrap this up quickly.” Stein reminded you, causing a shrill screech to release from your parted lips. “CRAAAAPPP!!!!” You instantly turned your back towards Peter and took off without another word, disappearing into the city.

Spiderman just stood there, processing what had just transpired. This was rare. Well, him getting all tounge tied while underneath the mask he called Spiderman. Seemed like your charismatic charms overpowered his. Not like that wasn't to be expected — You were pretty cute if he'd have to agree with your thousands of rowdied fanboys and girls. Jeesh, he felt himself falling head over heels for you instantly.

“I'm here!” You exhaled, busting the door to your last period classroom. There was no reason for you to give a damn about all the eyes laid on you when you performed such an action. After all, “[Name] Stark. Just on time before the bell rings.” You were the daughter of the most famous idol in all of New York, so school imaging meant nothing.

As soon as the bell rang, you were in the hallways being swamped with the rest of your classmates. In the middle of all the traffic, a shoulder bumped into yours. “H-hey, what the hell—” Turns out, it was the absolute love of your life once again— Walking out of your eyesight and never to be seen again until tomorrow morning.

‘Dammit. I still had time and couldn't give him the tickets.’ You mentally pouted with that curse.

———

Idfk if y'all want me to tag y'all in pt.2, but I'm making a part.2 just for your information

[baekhvuns]

From :- 🥀

Yo✌️

Ok dude I'm finally done with exams *a deep sigh of relief*...idrc about the results 😃

Anyways , im currently in my rom-com phase like you would not believe i watched straight 3 movies a day , it's big for me cuz i don't even sometimes hv the courage to watch a youtube video. But hey , 27 dresses , Business proposal and Legally blonde are just some other breeds.

Also , i finished watching modern family and I feel like I have no motive in my life 🕴️. It was legit the best show ever , istg.

And why is it that during my exam month the whole kpop industry had to go feral? ATEEZ member's hair colour changed , blackpink had a comeback after an eternity planned on my exam month (oh how lovely) , Nmixx and twice had a comeback , itzy's Japanese comeback , xiumin decided to come back LIKE WHAT GIVE ME A BREAK-

I have been obsessed over hard to love. Trust me rosé deserves a whole ass solo discography, like puhhleaseeee YG . Her voice legit heals me *runs away to listen to the song for 501736th time*

Your views on "dice" 🎙️

Oh also I've been writing a ff , ofc it's based on hwa 🌝. I usually wrote lots of stories before the whole miss Rona thing as well. But like i used to write on papers which was very tiring so during online school, i got a laptop and it has been pretty much my life. I never really had much interest in ffs until I read yours , that is . Because u fit my style so well , we must be soulmates 😖. (Is it weird to say i simp for the way u write?) One of my friends also started to write one of these ffs on Wattpad related to BTS and i was like wait why not i try and write one as well? It is one of the ideas that has been in my mind forevuhh and i had to be the one to implement it as well.

Id love to share it once it's finished. I mean it's always nice to hear constructive criticism.

Hmmmmmm what elsee??

Oh right , i shuffled through some of your asks cuz i was tryna find something and i realised you probably hv to go to aus. CUZ BESTIE SAME imma continue studies there , I'll go next year after finishing off this semester HOPEFULLY WE CAN MEET!!!

Now let's talk about a certain man called Park Seonghwa ,

He's too hot for this planet , i had no idea my wish of seeing him platinum would be taken seriously by the universe cuz i was on the verge of dying when i heard the news. BUT CAN WE APPRECIATE RED HAIRED WOO PLEASE???

*suddenly wondering why they're changing hair colours*

Wait- is it a comeback??? BUT THEY JUST RELEASED GUERRILLA - maybe a Japanese comeback hmmmmmm

I read this the other day if ily wasn't a word yeosang would say "you're my little happiness" 😭 *don't touch me I'm hypersensitive*

Also , Winona is joongie's crush huh???? Make this a kdrama pls!

Ok I've run out of things , remember to tc of yourselves, you got this bestie and keep on slaying.

Buh-bye 👋

hi!!

Ok dude I'm finally done with exams *a deep sigh of relief*...idrc about the results 😃 ///// Anyways , im currently in my rom-com phase like you would not believe i watched straight 3 movies a day , it's big for me cuz i don't even sometimes hv the courage to watch a youtube video. But hey , 27 dresses , Business proposal and Legally blonde are just some other breeds.

hope u did well!!! OH MY GOD AS U SHOULD PLS WATCH HOW TO LOE A GUY IN 10 DAYS AS WELL AS THE PROPOSAL, SHE'S THE MAN !!! ULT ROMCOM CLASSICS

Also , i finished watching modern family and I feel like I have no motive in my life 🕴️. It was legit the best show ever , istg.

omg that show goes on for forever

And why is it that during my exam month the whole kpop industry had to go feral? ATEEZ member's hair colour changed , blackpink had a comeback after an eternity planned on my exam month (oh how lovely) , Nmixx and twice had a comeback , itzy's Japanese comeback , xiumin decided to come back LIKE WHAT GIVE ME A BREAK-

LMFAOOOO I ASK THE SAME QUESTIONS,, like u idols dont got exams??? midterms to do why u on stage dancing like ur rent due??? ok bu tlike the second half of the comebacks always be slapping

I have been obsessed over hard to love. Trust me rosé deserves a whole ass solo discography, like puhhleaseeee YG . Her voice legit heals me *runs away to listen to the song for 501736th time*

omg i agree, its so nostalgic 2000's taylor type vibes and her voice >>> but yeah yeah yeah is absoulty amazing !!! need rose to drop her album with all the collabs i think u will like this 

Your views on "dice" 🎙️

none, absolutely nothing nice to say <3

Oh also I've been writing a ff , ofc it's based on hwa 🌝. I usually wrote lots of stories before the whole miss Rona thing as well. But like i used to write on papers which was very tiring so during online school, i got a laptop and it has been pretty much my life. I never really had much interest in ffs until I read yours , that is . Because u fit my style so well , we must be soulmates 😖. (Is it weird to say i simp for the way u write?) One of my friends also started to write one of these ffs on Wattpad related to BTS and i was like wait why not i try and write one as well? It is one of the ideas that has been in my mind forevuhh and i had to be the one to implement it as well.

OH?>? HWA FIC??? AYOO,, simp for my writing??i wish u saw my draft for yunho you'd wanna unFOLLOW DELETE BLOCK !!!! but tysm for saying that 😭😭😭😭 just hoping the new one doesn't disappoint <3 AAA U SHOULD DEF WRITE FICS SOMETIMES ITS A THERAPY OF SORTS! i hope we get to see some one day!

Id love to share it once it's finished. I mean it's always nice to hear constructive criticism.

ofc omg pls share new fics always

Oh right , i shuffled through some of your asks cuz i was tryna find something and i realised you probably hv to go to aus. CUZ BESTIE SAME imma continue studies there , I'll go next year after finishing off this semester HOPEFULLY WE CAN MEET!!!

aOH NO WAY UR STUDYING THERE??? as a biased canadian i think u should come here <3 AAA, HOPEFULLY WE DO!!!

Now let's talk about a certain man called Park Seonghwa ,

nO

He's too hot for this planet , i had no idea my wish of seeing him platinum would be taken seriously by the universe cuz i was on the verge of dying when i heard the news. BUT CAN WE APPRECIATE RED HAIRED WOO PLEASE???

i agree everything u said here, infact i ghost wrote this YES RED HAIRED MR WOOYOUNG HES A DIFF BREED ATM AND ID LIKE TO ADOPT

*suddenly wondering why they're changing hair colours* Wait- is it a comeback??? BUT THEY JUST RELEASED GUERRILLA - maybe a Japanese comeback hmmmmmm

apparently?? hongjoong said there is one??? but maybe just for concerts but they are being sus

I read this the other day if ily wasn't a word yeosang would say "you're my little happiness" 😭 *don't touch me I'm hypersensitive* ///// Also , Winona is joongie's crush huh???? Make this a kdrama pls!

90'S FASHION DESIGNER KIM HONGJOONH AU WHENN WHEN WHEN

Ok I've run out of things , remember to tc of yourselves, you got this bestie and keep on slaying.

you tooo!!!!! keep slaying miss slay <3

[newwaveshxt-blog]

10 for 10: lil daydream

for our first post we covered artist lil daydream. to anyone who is fortunate enough to listen to him for at least even one track will quickly catch on to one thing: he’s good. in fact, he’s so good, he records, writes, mixes, and produces the majority of his own music. this has resulted in a style that is greatly influenced by the autotuned-crooning of lil uzi vert, young thug, and travis $cott, but has been morphed and shaped into a niche entirely his own. his music is not earthly, to fully understand it, one must travel to outer space. his beats feel spacey, yet elegant, and at the same time, he knows how to turn up the heat to 100 and dial in bangers such as smoke!, a frakcija-produced heater. he is at his best when he has a beat he can sing on, with beautiful melodic tracks such as lock & load, or raf!, a collaboration with fellow north county cohort unotimestwo, who we have covered before. recently we got to interview daydream for the debut of our interview series, 10 for 10.

the following questions we asked him were the following:

1) What part of san diego are you from, and how has this influenced you musically and personally?

growing up as a kid, i moved around a lot. my father was in the military so i've been everywhere. But when we came to san diego it was the same time i was tryna figure myself out as a kid. it was like 7th grade. so i really started getting into fashion and other shit, like rap and skating. We used to skate everyday after school cuz our school had an after school program and i remember me and the homies would all just skate, kick it, and rap. We all listened to hella music so that's really how i found my homies. I gotta lot of memories in the hills, good and bad. But it definitely made me grow up, and i try to put that in my music. So North Daygo is home, i'm from the hills. the north side coming up, just wait.

2) How long ago did you start rapping and what inspired you the most to start?

ever since i was little, i was a writer. wrote a lot of poetry and kinda got addicted to it because i realized i really could express myself however i wanted to without any worries. So i really didn't even start out rapping, i was just writing some shut down and tryna make it sound cool. but my pops has always been a big music head so he always played rap around me, even when i was little. so i kinda combined the two. i wrote and recorded my first actual song like sophomore year on this shitty as mic for like guitar hero or some shit, that shit was trash haha. i'm just a lil dude who always got a lot of shit on my mind, so i'd rather just get it all out and express rather than keep it in. I never really write anymore, especially not as much as i used to. i honestly just get in there now and just go. but it's cool because i think that phase really played a big part of me developing into what i am now. i've really just been inspired by the things that's happened to me and how've they effected me. Expressing myself through "lil daydream" is really the most freedom I've ever had, at least that's how i feel.

3) What inspired “lil daydream”? why did you pick this name specifically?

I've had a bunch of names. but daydream is really just a fantasy. designed to be an alternate reality. paradise. nightmares. Daydream is every emotion and feeling ever felt but just twisted perfectly enough that it brings euphoria. i named myself because that's how i feel when i make my art, daydreaming. it's a whole another universe. i really just wanna make things that will be remembered.

4) Who are you biggest musical influences?

super old fall out boy, lil when they first came out. uzi. carti.

5) describe your style of music, in your own words.

i hate putting a label on my style. because i feel like i can do a lot. i try not to make every song sound the same as an artist because i wanna see what i can create. but if i really had to describe it, it's like "Rebel Without A Cause".. but more dark, with lots of boof, thoughts, princesses, and imagination.

6) What is your favorite song to date and why does it stand out to you?

my favorite song? ever? nah i don't have one. i gotta a lot of unrealeased shit i really like but nah, not a favorite song.

7) who would you most like to work with in the future and why?

definitely uzi. carti. always wanted to do a song with pete wentz. travis scott.

8) What has been your biggest challenge during your career? what has been the biggest obstacle for lil daydream to overcome?

i'm really hard on myself, not with music, just with everything in general. i'm a perfectionist. so i really want everything to always sound just like it does in my head when i try to create, but its not always that easy. my material that i use is all real, so sometimes i know that i can say some things that affect certain people around me a certain way, and i've been dealing with that since the start. that's definitely been the hardest part, the critique outside the music. i try to not let it get to me.

9) Who are your favorite people to collaborate with, and why?

don't really do alot of collabs, i'm always myself. Vlone life lol. but really. i really only see and fuck with the people i keep close to me and my family. Kinda figured out i can't trust a lot. but that's just me. i've done a few collabs though, usually all from the northside though. I've gotten a lot of requests but i try and stay in my own universe for the most part.

10) shameless promo plug

Just wanna thank THENEWWAVE for interviewing me, this was lit. nightmares dropping soon, sorry for the wait i promise it's dropping soon. Shoutout KG aka SPREE, shoutout all my lil homies, shout out my family, northside we here. follow me on soundcloud: http://soundcloud.com/lildaydream1600 ... follow me on twitter and instagram @lildaydream1600 <\3