#cue the rich.ard si.ken ''love for you is larger than the usual romantic love. it's like a religion. it's terrifying''

[mcmorare]

lavender hollyhock chrysanthemum!!!!

botanical headcanon prompts

lavender : how easy is it to gain your muse’s trust ? once their trust is broken , how might one go about mending it ? Not easy. Katrina is a very distrusting person, and she tends not to give people many opportunities to break her trust in the first place because she assumes that if she does, they will. It's no doubt a byproduct of her upbringing - she couldn't trust her parents, couldn't trust most of the people in her town. Her first boyfriend outed her. In her main verse, when she tried to find a place to go after running away from home, it turned out to be an evil organization that wanted to use her for experimentation. Historically, the only person she genuinely trusts is Ariane. If someone did get close enough to where they really could break her trust, and then they did, it would be difficult to mend. They would have to show that they understand what they did and why it's so serious to her, and that they don't intend to do it again. Even so, it would take some time and it would be difficult to get back to the place they were before, because from then on there would always be a voice in the back of her head saying they betrayed her once, they can do it again.

hollyhock : how strong is your muse’s sense of ambition ? what’s something they strive for in life ? Katrina isn't exactly ambitious, but she's very determined. She will work hard for the things that she wants, but the main reason I don't entirely classify it as ambition is that she doesn't really have any big goals she's chasing. The main goal of her life has been survival. I have a tiny meta post about it here, but the bottom line is that across all her verses, she's never really allowed herself to have any big ambitions. She's been stuck in survival mode her whole life, and she doesn't know how to get out. Even in her main verse and her tl verse, where she does enjoy her occupation, a considerable part of why she keeps with it is because she considers it the only thing she's good enough at to make a living off of. If she did have a big ambition, she probably would feel it quite strongly, but it's never been something she's stopped to think about.

chrysanthemum : how does your muse express romantic love ? how do they feel about love as a concept ? OH BOY. Katrina has lots of trouble with romantic love for two main reasons: first of all, she doesn't think it's something she'll ever be lucky enough to experience and doesn't consider it something she's worthy of. Secondly, she has very little experience with healthy romantic love. Growing up, her parents never really displayed love in the way that people write or sing about - it wasn't even really that they fought or hated each other, they were just... largely indifferent. Almost cold. They just didn't seem to love each other. (Which has to do with their upbringing, but that's a whole other discussion.) Her first - and to this day, pretty much only - serious relationship was not a healthy one, and ended with a huge breach of her trust (I also have a meta post about that here - tw for mentions of assault). It plays back into her problems with trust (this quote I think explains it well). The only reasons she still believes that true romantic love does exist is because of Ariane & Reina, and Julien & Alina. She looks at them and she sees the kinds of things people write about. But she doesn't think she'll ever have it. It's almost like goodness - she knows that good people exist. She doesn't think she'll ever get to be one of them. That being said, when she is in a romantic relationship, one of her main love languages is quality time. She's not always the best with words, especially not when it comes to love - it's easier to fluster her than she'd have you believe. But I would say one of the biggest expressions of love from her - love of any kind, really - is trust. Trust is something that's very difficult for her, so if she makes an effort to let someone in, that says something. With romantic partners in particular, physical touch can be an extension of this, since she's not very touchy-feely with people she's not very trusting of. Finding someone that she can be more physically comfortable with is a big indicator that she trusts and loves them.