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pepi1989 · 3 days

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Hi could you do a safe Ben Shelton alphabet? :) thank uuuu

is this alright? i've never written anything like this lol

SFW Alphabet - Ben Shelton

A = Affection Ben is affectionate in a natural, effortless way. He’s always giving warm hugs, playful touches, and sneaky kisses on the cheek. His love language is physical touch, but he's not overbearing, just the right amount of affection to make you feel adored without being clingy.

B = Best friend As a best friend, Ben would be loyal, fun, and always supportive. He’s the type who brings out the best in you, encouraging your passions and keeping things light with his humor. The friendship would start through a shared love of sports or a common interest, evolving into a strong bond over time.

C = Cuddles Ben loves cuddling, especially after a long day on the court. He prefers being the big spoon, wrapping his arms around you tightly, but doesn’t mind switching it up. He’s a warm and solid presence, making you feel safe and comfortable.

D = Domestic Ben enjoys the idea of settling down, but his tennis career keeps him on the move. When he’s home, though, he’s surprisingly good at handling domestic tasks. He’s not a master chef, but he can whip up a decent meal. Cleaning? He’s more the “helping hand” type, always ready to lend a hand but never doing it alone.

E = Ending If Ben had to break up with someone, he’d be upfront and honest. He wouldn’t ghost or play games, instead sitting down for a mature conversation, ensuring there’s closure on both sides. It’d be tough for him, but he’d want to handle it respectfully.

F = Fiance(e) Commitment is a big deal to Ben. He wouldn’t rush into marriage but once he’s ready, he’d be all in. He’d propose in a heartfelt, personal way, after a long, meaningful relationship. He’d take his time, wanting the relationship to feel steady before taking the next step.

G = Gentle Ben is both physically and emotionally gentle. He’s mindful of your feelings, always checking in to make sure you’re okay. Physically, he’s careful with his strength, making his touches soft and considerate.

H = Hugs Ben is a hugger. He loves pulling you in for a quick squeeze or holding you in a long, warm embrace. His hugs are strong, comforting, and frequent. Whether he’s excited, happy, or simply wants to be close, he’s always ready for a hug.

I = I love you Ben wouldn’t rush to say “I love you,” but when he does, it’s sincere. He’d wait until he’s sure of his feelings and the strength of the relationship before saying it. When he does say it, you know he means it with every fiber of his being.

J = Jealousy Ben isn’t overly jealous, but he has his moments. If someone’s paying a little too much attention to you, he might get a bit protective, but he trusts you completely. He handles jealousy by talking about it openly and making sure you’re both on the same page.

K = Kisses Ben’s kisses are playful and tender. He loves kissing your forehead, nose, and, of course, your lips. His favorite is probably sneaking a quick kiss while you’re in the middle of talking, just to catch you off guard.

L = Little ones Ben is amazing around children. His playful, goofy side shines when he’s around kids, and they naturally gravitate toward him. He’s patient and gentle, making him a favorite among the little ones in his life.

M = Morning Mornings with Ben are filled with lazy smiles and sleepy conversations. He’s not a morning person by nature, but once he’s up, he’s full of energy and positivity. Expect breakfast together and lots of joking around to start the day.

N = Night Nights with Ben are calm and cozy. He likes to wind down with you, watching a movie or just talking about the day. He’s big on physical closeness, so you’ll probably find yourselves cuddled up on the couch or in bed.

O = Open Ben is open about himself fairly early in the relationship. He doesn’t see the point in hiding things, so he reveals his thoughts and feelings naturally over time. He’s open with his past, his ambitions, and his insecurities.

P = Patience Ben has a lot of patience, especially for the people he cares about. It takes a lot to make him angry, and even then, he prefers to talk things through rather than lash out.

Q = Quizzes Ben is surprisingly attentive. He remembers little details about you, from how you take your coffee to your favorite songs. He might not remember every single thing, but he’s got the big ones locked down.

R = Remember His favorite moment in your relationship is probably something simple but meaningful, like a late-night conversation where you both opened up completely. He treasures moments of vulnerability and connection.

S = Security Ben is protective, but not in a suffocating way. He looks out for you and always makes sure you’re safe, but he respects your independence. He appreciates when you stand by his side and show him support, too.

T = Try Ben puts effort into everything—dates, anniversaries, you name it. He loves making you smile, whether it’s through thoughtful gifts or spontaneous adventures. He’s always trying to keep the spark alive.

U = Ugly Ben’s worst habit is probably his occasional forgetfulness when he’s focused on tennis. He can get caught up in his routine and might forget little things, but he always makes up for it when he realizes.

V = Vanity Ben cares about his appearance, especially before a big match or event. He’s confident, but not overly vain. He likes looking his best, but he doesn’t obsess over it.

W = Whole Ben would feel incomplete without you, but he’s also secure in himself. He’s the type who sees a relationship as adding to his life rather than completing him, but your presence definitely makes his world better.

X = Xtra A random headcanon: Ben has a habit of singing (badly) in the shower, and it’s something you secretly find endearing, even if it’s a little off-key.

Y = Yuck Ben doesn’t like dishonesty. He values trust and open communication, and nothing bothers him more than being lied to, even about small things.

Z = Zzz Ben is a heavy sleeper. Once he’s out, he’s out. He loves to cuddle while sleeping, and it’s not uncommon for him to hold onto you throughout the night.

#ben shelton #ben shelton imagine #ben shelton x reader #tennis x reader

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sabraeal · 4 months

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The Strong Pack Thrives, Part 3

[Read on AO3]

Written for @kpslp, who was the second raffled winner for my 1000 Follower celebration!

The mattress yields beneath the weight of her knee, as welcoming as the groan that tears from Obi’s throat, coaxing her further forward—

Until Shirayuki bumps against his outstretch hand. His palm burns through both skirt and petticoats, fingers fitted around the wide curve of her hip, holding her still. Or more likely: keeping her at bay.

His eyelashes flutter over the sharp jut of his cheekbone, only a sliver of molten gold peering through a cage of black lace. “You can’t help like that, Miss.”

Shirayuki’s tongue sits sluggish in her mouth, clumsy as she murmurs, “What do you mean?”

Alphas may be famed for their acute senses, for their ability to detect the most minute change in mood and attitude, but there is something distinctly different about that knowledge when Obi’s head inclines toward her. When his nostrils flare and it is no longer some dry paragraph she read in a treatise a handful of years ago, but her scent being sampled, rolling around in his sinuses like lords taste wine. “I can’t smell you.”

Impossible. Not when the tops of her thighs are so slick they nearly squeak. “Weren’t you just complaining that you could?”

There’s a flash of teeth when his mouth tilts, matching the coquettish flutter of his eyelashes. “Well, Miss, that was before.”

“B-before?”

His hand flexes, fitting closer, thumb stretching across the crease of her thigh. There’s a vein there, a large one, and she wonders if he can feel the way her pulse thrums, careening from one beat to the next, a runaway stallion driving her heart. “Before you said you’d come to bed.”

There’s barely enough air in her lungs to stutter out an, “O-oh.”

“You’re wearing too much.” His thumb drags over the fabric of her skirt, squeezing thoughtfully at the end of its arc. “It’d be better if we were skin-to-skin.”

Her tongue tries to wet her lips, but his eyes fix on it, darkening as they follow every useless slide, and— and her mouth is too incredibly dry to manage it. “I-I…could take off my j-jacket.”

Obi doesn’t reply; he only settles back, letting his hand fall from her hip to the mattress. It should be less distracting without his clever fingers dancing just at the corner of her vision, being helpful, as he puts it— and underfoot, according to everyone else. But instead her attention catches on the way the lamplight pools on his chest, turning bare flesh to living, breathing bronze, and the buttons fumble right out from beneath her fingers.

There’s not a drop of innocence in him as his eyes lift, searing a languid trail from hip to throat before meeting her own. “Need help, Miss?”

He twists, rolling up to his elbow, and the sheets shift around him, falling from rib to hip on one side and cutting down across his abdomen on the other, baring the tip of a dark trail leading down—

“I-I can handle it,” she gasps, cheeks burning as she twists away. Shirayuki’s never had complaints about her natural inclination; being a beta has always suited her best— but when Obi allows that dark chuckle to rumble out from his chest, she wishes that she might have an alpha’s nose, if only to scent his desire as keenly as he does hers.

She looses the clasp at her throat, stripping the coat from her shoulders and setting it neatly aside. Fussing with its folds buys her a moment to think, to consider the silky gown she’d worn beneath it— it’s plain, a close-cut cream color meant to merely offset the deep red of the wool atop it, and without the amount of petticoats necessary to survive the North’s colder months, would do little to conceal scent or skin. And yet, yet—

Her hands fall to its closures as well— smaller ones than the coat, little hooks and eyes devised to lie flat beneath it— the first at the neck, and next the dip of her collarbone. The third— just above the dip between her breasts— gives her trouble, the metal slipping from her quivering fingers, and the loss of momentum nearly makes her lose her nerve as well. That is, until Obi’s breath catches, the scent of musk and spice so thick she sways on her feet.

The clasps trail to just below her belly, but Shirayuki only manages the next two before she wriggles out, dragging the whole thing right over her head. She’s less fastidious about its folds, managing to get the arms tucked over the skirts before she abandons it to fuss with her first layer of petticoats.

“Stays too,” Obi suggests, onces she’s removed two of the three, eyes fixed to where they’re laced. “You’d be more comfortable.”

Her lips press together. He’s hardly wrong— flexible as they are, they did little more in supine than poke in odd places— but still, she’s aware it’s one more layer of armor being bargained away, a barrier between her skin and his, pried loose by flimsy reason.

And yet, it doesn’t stop her from tugging at the laces. The linen cord resists as she tries to coax it from its knot, working it loose enough so that she might win free. The weight of his eyes on her makes her itchy, impatient— she’d never thought of her undergarments in terms of allure, but there’s none with her short stays. Just a simple starched tube with baleen run through it, meant to go over head head, and ah, if only she’d thought to wear her combinations, then at least there might be some enticing lace and froth, as silly as she’d always found it—

“Slower,” Obi tells her, half a growl.

It takes a moment for her knees to hold her, for the heat pooling between her legs to become bearable. But then she begins again, the slim strap of her stays slipping down her shoulder as she works the laces loose, enough that she can finally lift it over her head—

“The stockings too.”

She hesitates, peering at him through the webwork of her arms and stays. “Stockings?” Even with the carpet, the floor would be freezing, and her arms are already pimpling from the chill. “Why?”

There’s an attempt at innocence now; eyes batting wide and sweet— belied by the hunger in them, pupil nibbling away at iris until all that’s left is the barest corona of gold. “They’ll itch.”

If she’d worn her usual wool, Shirayuki might agree, but she hadn’t dare wear anything but her best to breakfast. There's no reason to tempt Rugilia's lord to dote on her, not when Eisetsu had been so eager to dress her in gold and crepe only days ago. “They’re silk.”

His eyebrows twitch, intrigued. “Then I guess you could leave them on.”

She nearly does— there’s been enough of her armor peeled from her already— but she catches the lazy lilt of his mouth and decides that in some cases, bare skin might be better protection than covered. Obi, for his part, simply hums— not disappointed, but interested.

When she stands, only a linen chemise to cover her, smoothing the fabric down her hips, mischief sparks in those hungry eyes. “You know, Miss, maybe—”

“This is enough,” she informs him, firmer than she feels— steady, unlike the step she takes toward the bed. “Don’t let your eyes be bigger than your stomach.”

“Haah, Miss.” The words rumble through the mattress, shivering up the knee she sets on it. “You don’t know the half of it.”

With no more warning than that, the blankets rise up to swallow her whole.

It’s disorienting at first. Like how it is to fall through the ice— shocking, enough to make a mind forget which way is up and which is down, every direction collapsing into either here or not here. Only instead of teeth-chattering cold to overwhelm her, it is scent, spice and musk and sex all tumbled together until she is left panting, pressed against the hard planes of his body, heat scorching her even through her chemise.

“Finally,” he groans, burying his nose at the crook of her neck and just— just huffing, as if he’s a man lost in the desert and her scent’s the oasis that will slake his thirst. It’s hard to think with him so close, with his hands holding her so tight she’s half convinced she’ll find whole prints when she climbs back out again. It’d hardly be the first time; despite the careful distance Obi usually keeps, she’d found a thumb and a few fingers that time she jumped off Brecker’s tower, and a whole hand when she’d knocked him into the snow their first time in Lilias. But this—

This is different. Thinking of those marks on her— ones to match the nip he’d given her in the carriage, his fingers so deep within her she could barely do more than breathe through the fire in her veins—

Well, a beta doesn’t rut, doesn’t go into heat, but whatever his scent does to her must be close to it. Since when his canines prick the soft stretch of her skin, she only moans, tilting her head to give him more to—

“W-wait,” she gasps, sense shivering through her his teeth bear down. “E-excuse me! That’s n-not— that’s not why—”

She has to swallow the sound that tries to escape her as his jaw unlocks from her throat.

“Haah, sorry, Miss,” he purrs, not the least bit contrite as his tongue soothes the bite. “Just got…excited.”

With her palms trapped against his chest, she can feel it— the wild beat of his heart, galloping against her palms. But as he settles against her, nose buried up under her ear the way he had at the manor, she also feels it lull— not to calmness, but to something less like a race against time. Something less like danger.

Relief rushes through her; holding her this way, scenting her, may not be the cure, but it at least takes the edge off his desire, turning urgent to optional, need simply to want. Hardly comfortable, but she’ll take it over the sweating, feverish pain he’d been in only moments ago.

Her body does not so much relax as release, every muscle easing into his welcome heat. His grip is too tight for her arms to move from his chest, but her legs shift, one of her calves lifting over his, tugging it gently between her own. There’s no danger to being close now, not when his breath flutters so soothingly at her neck, when his hands have ceased their bruising strength, and when he shifts, loosening his panicked grip on her—

Oh.

There’s something hard trapped between their bellies. Something that twitches with her sharp breath, even though Obi hardly seems to notice. Something that she would be happy to ignore, if only—

If only it weren’t so close to where his fingers had pressed into her. Where they had left her, stretched and sated, and now— now she can’t control the heat that flashes through her, can’t clamp down on how it floods between her legs, and— and Obi groans.

His musky scent had already been strong beneath the blankets, but it’s overpowering now, her fingers curling into his chest if only to keep herself steady. A mistake; she could have ignored it before, could have laid there, pretending to be none the wiser, but the moment her nails scrape at his skin— he twitches. Right against her hip. Not once but twice, a shiver shuddering through him, and— and it’s hardly his fault, really, it’s just serendipity, the reality of how their bodies align, but—

But he shifts between the first and the second, no longer flat against her hip but angled, the shaft skirting the edge of where she throbs. It rubs against her, not where she needs, but so close, hardly more than a full breath keeping her from that delicious shiver she’d felt with his fingers.

It's nothing to move against it. An accident really. Just the barest tilt of her hips. Nothing suggestive, but enough to let it shift, resting fully along her belly. A widening of her legs that leaves the base nestled right above where she throbs, needing—

Ah, she hardly knows, but— something. Something she can almost taste the shadows of when her hips jostle into his, a thin finger of lightning scouring up her spine. Her breath saws into his shoulder, thoughts skittering out with it, leaving only one behind: more.

He’s right there, isn’t he? So close that she nearly aches with anticipation for the next accident, the next fumbling brush that would send those wisps of pleasure storming beneath her skin, bringing her closer to the release she no longer lingers over, but craves. It would be easy to stumble into another mistake, for hips to shift or legs to slip, to chase that lightning with no one at fault but sheer coincidence—

So there’s no way for him to tell that it’s not, that this tiny bump of their hips isn’t a clumsiness but calculation, and that the others that follow— not frequent enough to make a rhythm, to seem purposeful— keep the tingle itching beneath her skin, not quite scratching, and yet—

“Ow!” Her nails bite into bronze, trapped so tight she can’t wriggle lose enough to rub at her neck, but there’s no need, not when Obi’s mouth is already soothing when he nipped.

“Sorry, sorry,” he murmurs, little more than brushes against bruised flesh, hands clutching her hips so tight she can barely breathe, let alone move. “It’s— your scent. I can— I can smell you…”

“O-oh.” It seems impossible when her nose is so full of musk and pine and spice she’s practically choking on him. And yet his hand drops, gripping just above the joint of her knee to hitch it over his hip, and she smells it— that faint sweetness of apple and a whiff of fresh herbs. Her. “But—”

That grip drags her further, not just spreading her over the hip but wrapping around it, angling her so close that his shaft no longer rests above where she needs him but against it, the thin linen of her chemise trapped between them. That alone is enough to flush the air from her lungs, to leave her so breathless she can only manage an, “Oh!” before—

Before he lowers his grip past her hips and grinds, pleasuring flooding her so suddenly, so deeply she tastes it. Her tongue flicks over her lips to savor the flavor. There’s nothing trapping her hands now, but she can do little but clutch at him, gasping and squirming as his relentless rutting sets every thought toppling out of her head. All her treatise and theories elide to moans, thready and desperate as they escape with her, struggling to tread the water of her desire.

Her chemise is damp where it presses against her, soaked, and it rucks up with each of his thrusts. Inch by inch it bares her to him, makes her aware that though his trousers cling tight to his legs, his cock has long escaped them. It’s different than in the carriage, when she’d held him against her and let that long slide push her up and over the crest of her pleasure; now he’s the one holding her, thrusting into her at his own pace, no barrier between them, and— and—

It’s not enough. It’s too much. It’s— something, but there’s not enough of her mind left to make it up, only the static shivering under her skin and the heady scent of spice seeping through her. A good thing she doesn’t have to, since Obi makes it for her— with one arm slung over her back and the other under her bottom, he rolls, bringing him to his back and both her knees falling to frame his hips.

Shirayuki blinks, head lifting, hands falling, reaching out to brace against his chest. The tight cocoon of sheets is a tangle around them, a hopeless knot of silk and velvet and down— but one that parts as she sits back, tumbling like water down a fall until it pool at her hips, leaving him bare beneath her hands. Her breath catches; oh, she’s seen Obi on his back before, with chest both covered and not, but never like this— with hunger so naked in his eyes she longs to know what it would be like to be consumed.

“Obi.” Her nails curl, digging the same furrows her brows do. “Why…?”

Did you stop? She had hardly known what she meant to ask, but that’s what spring to her lips, desperate, needy. But she can’t possibly ask— not when she offered her scent solely to soothe him, to calm the instincts that civil society no longer requires from its alphas. She can’t simply change her mind now because—

“Ha-aah!” Her hands scrabble down his belly, trying to find purchase as his hands hook behind her knees, dragging her up, forward, until the hard ridge of his cock nestles between her folds. They catch in the sparse hair tracing down his belly, and oh, it’s all she can do to hang on as his hips cant against hers, dragging the length of him right along her slit, reminding her of how much emptiness can ache. “Obi, I…”

No actual words come to her, not when his tip catches on the ridge of her pubic bone and he moans, so long and loud she can hear herself grown wetter. The sound of him sliding through her slick tangles between her gasps and his groans, a mortifying symphony that only makes her hotter, slicker, and when their eyes meet—

His drop, right to where his cock ruts against her cunt. Or where it would, if her chemise didn’t lay damp and heavy on his stomach, obscuring his view. His mouth twists, impatient, and ah, she nearly apologizes until one hand reaches out, fisting the linen in his grip. With a sharp tug, it lifts, and oh, haah, there he is, the flushed head of his cock peeking out from between her lips. His hips tilt, pulling back, and it disappears, dragging along that throbbing bud before peeping out again. It should be ridiculous, a child’s game of hide and seek, but instead—

Instead, it’s enough to make a new rush of slick to flood between her legs. Her scent blooms strong even to her deadened nose, and Obi arches back against his pillow, growling, fingers clenched tight around her thighs. “Not enough.”

Frustrated, that’s how he sounds. Unsatisfied. Disappointed. Shirayuki’s heart flutters to her throat. “What—?”

Obi’s always been fond of words— too fond, Kiki always told her, too polite to roll her eyes, how like an omega— even if his quick thinking often talked him into more trouble than out of it. But despite his reputation— for a silver tongue, Obi would insist, even as Zen snorted, for being mouthy— it’s action where he’s always excelled. And now is no different; with no more answer than a groan, the hands wrapped around her thighs urge her forward, knees no longer framing his hips, but goading her up to his waist, and—

And it’s too fast. Shirayuki manages to creep only a couple inches across the mattress before her ankles tangle in sheets and her knees catch on her chemise, spilling her flat across his chest. A mortifying position to start, made worse by the way her bottom sticks straight up like a bitch eager for a mount. If he wasn’t beneath her, she might think this was how he wanted her, bared and begging, but—

But it’s not. Not when his palms fit right over the backs of her thighs and tug, dragging her up over his chest, so quick she barely has time to reach out her hands and brace against the headboard. He doesn’t stop, not until she’s got her knees hooked over his shoulders, so close to him that his breath ruffles the deeper auburn curling over her mound. It’s an odd position, one that leaves her off-kilter and exposed even as her chemise drapes over his chin, covering everything from his nose down.

It’s the damp part, of course, soaked in her slick and thick with her scent, and she grimaces. There’s no polite way to pluck it up, no stock apologies for having literally rubbed his nose in her scent, but—

But his eyes meet hers, iris barely more than a thin hold thread wrapped around the abyss of his pupils, and he licks a long, languid stripe down her folds.

“Haa-aaah!” She clutches at the headboard as he goes back for seconds. It’s terrible how she can feel his smirk against her skin, how he splits her lips with the gentlest prod of his tongue, lapping deeper. The tip teases the shape of her slit, tracing up one side before sliding over the other, reminding her that she’s empty, reminding her that she could be filled, and, haah, she want to watch him, to see why his eyes flutter so coyly shut, and—

And then Obi sucks, and oh, this chemise has got to go.

At least, that’s what she’d like to do. But the pleasure sparking beneath her skin makes her fingers clumsy, tangling in the hem only to let it slip from her fingers, the soaked part slapping right over his nose.

“Sorry,” she gasps, taking the fabric he hands her, his snickers sending an unbearably enticing hum through her bones. “I just— oh—”

It gets up over her shoulders this time, but there’s buttons and sleeves and lace; a veritable maze of an undergarment, made no better by every thought in her head abandoning her as Obi sinks two fingers into her, right down to the last knuckle.

“Just a moment!” she pants, heaving herself off him. “I just have to—”

She clambers off the bed, enduring the terrible rumble of his laugh, purring out from so deep in his chest she’s half tempted to go back and catch them with her mouth. The floor is freezing beneath her bare feet, but it’s bracing too, giving her surer footing than his mouth had, and she lifts it over her head. It’s so much easier now to tip over, letting the weight of the skirt puddle the mass of linen beside her heels, finally leaving her bare.

It’s with a silly sort of pride that she turns back to him, like a child having figured out how to take off their own stockings. There’s certainly amusement in Obi’s eyes when she meets him, but there’s heat too, a promise, and when she looks down he— he’s—

He’s touching himself.

#obiyuki #akagami no shirayukihime #snow white with the red hair #lemon #1000 followers #my fic #abo au #ans #there were many places to cut this and i eventually just had to go with the one #where i would need another 1K plus to make it work #this was one of those fics that just did not want to be written #mainly because i ended up with MANY EXTRA DAYS of kids running around #which really puts the damper on this whole like. writing smut thing!#hard to do it when every five minutes i feel a tiny warm hand #and then hear “mom...can i get some goldfish?”#thanks buddy really helping mama create a mood here

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jgroffdaily · 1 year

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In an alternate universe, there was a little more Looking.

For two seasons, fans of the HBO series watched Patrick (Jonathan Groff), Agustín (Frankie J. Alvarez), and Dom (Murray Bartlett) live their (often messy) lives in San Francisco. By the season 2 finale in 2015, Dom was mending his fractured friendship with Doris (Lauren Weedman), Agustín was happy with new love interest Eddie (Daniel Franzese), and Patrick ended his relationship with Kevin (Russell Tovey) only to end the finale in a chair at his ex Richie's (Raúl Castillo) barbershop.

The trio was starting to figure out what they wanted — or in Patrick's case, didn't want — before things were cut short. Instead of a season 3, HBO greenlit a movie to wrap it all up. In the end, Agustín married Eddie, Patrick reunited with Richie, and Dom's story ended a bit unfinished.

While the 2016 film provided some closure, it left fans wondering what would've happened if there had been a third season instead. Here Looking creator Michael Lannan shares some of his team's original plans — and some additional unused ideas, like an alternate plan for the season two premiere.

Patrick

Looking explored relationships outside of traditional monogamy through couples like Agustín and Frank (O-T Fagbenle) and Dom and Lynn (Scott Bakula) — and Patrick would have followed suit in season 3 after breaking up with Kevin. "Patrick has this standard love triangle, and it felt like it was time to shatter that trope," Lannan says. One potential was Patrick entering into a relationship with someone very comfortable with who they are and whose sexuality was more fluid, which would have contrasted starkly with often rigid Patrick. "In the best case scenario, I think Patrick was going to learn to take himself a little less seriously through this relationship, while also feeling more confident in his own identity," Lannan explains. Another idea was Patrick entering a throuple, giving him some perspective on his views on relationships.

The episodes that almost were

"We almost did a Burning Man episode, we actually got all the clearances for it. We were one of the first shows to ever get permission to shoot at Burning Man," Lannan recalls of what they'd planned for the season 2 premiere before going in another direction. There was also discussion of the characters participating in the AIDS/LifeCycle (an annual bike-ride fundraiser that goes from San Francisco to Los Angeles) — and an earthquake episode.

The Patrick-Dom of it All

Looking often referenced the almost hookup that blossomed into Dom and Patrick's friendship, but the pals almost actually went through with it: "We had an idea that Dom and Patrick were going to go out one night looking for hookups and then they go home with another couple that wants to have a foursome. They end up doing it, which is fun, hot, surprising, and weird for them," reveals Lannon, who also considered having the two move in together.

Is more Looking coming?

"We would absolutely bring people back together," says the creator. He's confident about everyone's participation, they just need the right story to reunite the characters. A Christmas special is one idea that has been thrown around, so put that on your wish list.

#jonathan groff #looking hbo #michael lannan

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leaping-laelaps-art · 1 year

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Conulariids are an extinct group of probable cnidarians with 4-sided pyramidal thecae. They are relatively uncommon fossils but ranged from the Cambrian (possibly Ediacaran?) to the Triassic, comprising tens of genera and hundreds of described species (Lucas 2012).

Here are the reconstructed thecae of a small selection of species from every period of the conulariids' range, starting from the Cambrian in the top left and reaching all the way to the Triassic in the bottom right.

Since their soft parts are virtually never preserved (due to them being cnidarians and all that) (Van Iten & Südkamp 2010), most of our knowledge of conulariid biology and evolution is based on their more fossil-friendly thecae, which were composed of thin organophosphatic lamellae (Leme et al. 2008). Live conulariids were attached to the substrate by the apex of their theca; they probably captured suspended food particles or small prey using tentacles, just like other cnidarians, but it's hard to go in any more (non-speculative) detail without preserved soft tissues.

References:

Babcock, L. E. (1986). Devonian and Mississippian conulariids of North America. Part B. Paraconularia, Reticulaconularia, new genus, and organisms rejected from Conulariida. Annals of the Carnegie Museum, 55, 411–479. https://doi.org/10.5962/p.215204

Guimarães Simões, M., Coelho Rodrigues, S., Moraes Leme, J. de, & Van Iten, H. (2003). Some Middle Paleozoic Conulariids (Cnidaria) as Possible Examples of Taphonomic Artifacts. Journal of Taphonomy, 1(3), 163–184.

Hughes, N. C., Gunderson, G. O., & Weedon, M. J. (2000). Late Cambrian Conulariids from Wisconsin and Minnesota. Journal of Paleontology, 74(5), 828–838. https://doi.org/10.1666/0022-3360(2000)074<;0828:LCCFWA>2.0.CO;2

John, D. L., Hughes, N. C., Galaviz, M. I., Gunderson, G. O., & Meyer, R. (2010). Unusually preserved Metaconularia manni (Roy, 1935) from the Silurian of Iowa, and the systematics of the genus. Journal of Paleontology, 84(1), 1–31. https://doi.org/10.1666/09-025.1

Leme, J. M., Simões, M. G., Marques, A. C., & Van Iten, H. (2008). Cladistic Analysis of the Suborder Conulariina Miller and Gurley, 1896 (cnidaria, Scyphozoa; Vendian–Triassic). Palaeontology, 51(3), 649–662. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-4983.2008.00775.x

Lucas, S. (2012). The Extinction of the Conulariids. Geosciences, 2, 1–10. https://doi.org/10.3390/geosciences2010001

Sendino, C., & Zagorsek, K. (2011). The Aperture and Its Closure in an Ordovician Conulariid. Acta Palaeontologica Polonica, 56, 659–663. https://doi.org/10.4202/app.2010.0028

Slater, I. L. (1907). A monograph of British Conulariæ. Printed for the Palæontographical Society.

Thomas, G. A. (1969). Notoconularia, a New Conularid Genus from the Permian of Eastern Australia. Journal of Paleontology, 43(5), 1283–1290.

Van Iten, H., Konate, M., & Moussa, Y. (2008). Conulariids of the Upper Talak Formation (Mississipian, Visean) of Northern Niger (West Africa). Journal of Paleontology, 82(1), 192–196. https://doi.org/10.1666/06-083.1

Van Iten, H., Muir, L., Simões, M. G., Leme, J. M., Marques, A. C., & Yoder, N. (2016). Palaeobiogeography, palaeoecology and evolution of Lower Ordovician conulariids and Sphenothallus (Medusozoa, Cnidaria), with emphasis on the Fezouata Shale of southeastern Morocco. Palaeogeography, Palaeoclimatology, Palaeoecology, 460, 170–178. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.palaeo.2016.03.008

Van Iten, H., & Südkamp, W. H. (2010). Exceptionally preserved conulariids and an edrioasteroid from the Hunsrück Slate (Lower Devonian, SW Germany). Palaeontology, 53(2), 403–414. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-4983.2010.00942.x

Waterhouse, J. B. (1979). Permian and Triassic conulariid species from New Zealand. Journal of the Royal Society of New Zealand, 9(4), 475–489. https://doi.org/10.1080/03036758.1979.10421833

敏郎杉山. (1942). 156. 日本産Conularidaの研究. 日本古生物学會報告・紀事, 1942(25), 185-194_1. https://doi.org/10.14825/prpsj1935.1942.185

#conularia #archaeoconularia #eoconularia #pseudoconularia #metaconularia #paraconularia #notoconularia #conulariid #cnidarian #paleozoic #mesozoic #palaeoblr #paleoart #my art

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timeless-fanfic · 19 days

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Simon Z: Romantic ABCs

Word Count: 1180

A = Affection Simon Z is reserved with his affection but deeply caring. He shows his love through thoughtful actions rather than overt displays. He might surprise you with small gestures like making your favorite meal or quietly being there when you need him, demonstrating his love in subtle but meaningful ways.

B = Best Friend Simon Z would be a steadfast and reliable best friend. Your friendship would likely develop through shared interests or mutual respect, where his quiet strength and dependable nature become evident. He’s a good listener and offers practical advice, making him a supportive and trustworthy friend.

C = Cuddles Simon Z enjoys cuddling, though he might not initiate it often. When he does, his cuddles are warm and comforting. He’s likely to cuddle you in a relaxed setting, like after a long day or on a quiet evening. His cuddles are gentle and provide a sense of security and closeness.

D = Domestic Simon Z is open to the idea of domestic life and enjoys creating a stable home environment. He’s practical and capable with household tasks, contributing to cooking, cleaning, and maintaining a comfortable home. He values a harmonious home life and is committed to making it work.

E = Ending If Simon Z had to end a relationship, he would approach it with a calm and thoughtful demeanor. He would discuss his feelings honestly and respectfully, aiming to provide closure and understanding. While it would be a difficult conversation, he would handle it with care and sensitivity.

F = Fiance(e) Simon Z is serious about commitment and would approach marriage thoughtfully. He values stability and security, so he would take his time to ensure that both of you are ready for this step. Once committed, he would be dedicated and reliable, looking forward to building a life together.

G = Gentle Simon Z is naturally gentle, both physically and emotionally. He handles you with care and attentiveness, always mindful of your feelings. His gentle nature makes him a comforting presence, and he is considerate in how he interacts with you, ensuring you feel valued and respected.

H = Hugs Simon Z enjoys hugs, though he might be more reserved in initiating them. When he does hug you, his hugs are tender and reassuring. He uses hugs as a way to connect with you and provide comfort, especially during challenging times.

I = I Love You Simon Z takes his time to express his love, waiting until he’s certain of his feelings. When he does say “I love you,” it’s with sincerity and depth. He values meaningful communication and wants to be sure that his words reflect his true emotions.

J = Jealousy Simon Z can experience jealousy, but he tends to handle it in a reserved and controlled manner. He might internalize his feelings and reflect on them privately. If he’s concerned, he would address it calmly and directly with you, focusing on open communication rather than confrontation.

K = Kisses Simon Z’s kisses are soft and deliberate. He enjoys kissing you in a gentle and loving manner, often choosing moments of quiet intimacy to express his affection. He might prefer kisses on the forehead or the lips, savoring the connection they provide.

L = Little Ones Simon Z is patient and nurturing with children. He enjoys spending time with them, offering guidance and support in a calm and steady manner. As a father, he would be attentive and caring, ensuring his children feel loved and secure.

M = Morning Mornings with Simon Z are calm and organized. He starts the day with a sense of purpose, often enjoying a quiet breakfast together. He values a peaceful start to the day and enjoys spending these moments in a relaxed and orderly manner.

N = Night Nights with Simon Z are serene and comforting. He values winding down together, whether it’s through quiet conversation or simply enjoying each other’s presence. He finds comfort in these quiet moments and looks forward to ending the day with you by his side.

O = Open Simon Z is thoughtful about revealing personal details, sharing things gradually as trust builds. He prefers to open up slowly, ensuring that he is comfortable and confident in the relationship before disclosing deeper aspects of himself.

P = Patience Simon Z is naturally patient, handling challenges with a calm and steady approach. He’s not easily frustrated and prefers to address issues with thoughtfulness and composure. His patience is a key strength in maintaining a harmonious relationship.

Q = Quizzes Simon Z remembers important details about you, often focusing on the things that matter most. He pays attention to your needs and preferences, using this knowledge to make thoughtful gestures and ensure you feel appreciated.

R = Remember Simon Z’s favorite moment in your relationship is likely to be a significant, shared experience that highlights the depth of your connection. He cherishes moments of understanding and emotional closeness, often reflecting on them with a sense of fondness.

S = Security Simon Z is protective in a quiet and reassuring way. He values creating a stable and secure environment for you, ensuring that you feel safe and supported. His protective nature is grounded in his desire to provide for and care for you.

T = Try Simon Z puts effort into the relationship through thoughtful actions and planning. He may not be the most spontaneous, but he is consistent in his efforts to make you feel valued and loved. He approaches special occasions and everyday tasks with consideration and care.

U = Ugly Simon Z’s bad habits might include being overly reserved or hesitant to express his emotions fully. He can sometimes be too self-reliant, avoiding seeking support even when needed. He’s aware of these tendencies and works to address them in the relationship.

V = Vanity Simon Z is not overly concerned with his appearance but maintains a sense of self-respect. He takes care of his grooming and presents himself well, but his focus is more on his character and actions rather than his outward appearance.

W = Whole Simon Z feels that you complete him, providing balance and support in his life. He values your presence deeply and would feel a sense of incompleteness without you. He sees you as an essential part of his happiness and well-being.

X = Xtra A random headcanon for Simon Z: He enjoys keeping a personal journal where he reflects on his thoughts and experiences. He might share excerpts with you or use it to express his feelings in a more introspective way.

Y = Yuck Simon Z dislikes inconsistency and lack of commitment. He values reliability and dedication, both in himself and in others. He also has a low tolerance for dishonesty, preferring straightforwardness and integrity in all aspects of life.

Z = Zzz Simon Z’s sleep habits are steady and disciplined. He values a good night’s rest and enjoys winding down with a calming routine. He finds comfort in falling asleep next to you and values the stability and relaxation of his sleep environment.

#the chosen fanfiction #the chosen x reader #simon z x reader

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itsagirlwithglasses · 2 years

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✨ B O O K R E V I E W ✨

> swipe for synopsis

📖 A Court of Silver Flames (ACOTAR #4)

✍️ Sarah J Maas

5/5 ⭐️

5/5 🌶

💭📝 REVIEW:

I was left absolutely speechless finishing this book. I’m so incredibly sad that this is the end of such an amazing adventure. (Although the author already confirmed there’s more to come)

This book focused on Nesta’s journey after the war with Hybern and the death of her father. We got a deep insight of Nesta’s mind not only after being Made but also how her childhood trauma made her into what she grew up to be: angry, feisty, closed up, thinking of herself as unworthy of love, thinking she failed to everyone and everything in her life.

This is such an emotional trajectory and one that I ended up relating and so attached to. Nesta’s story could be anyone’a story. Most people have been in a dark place and did not know how to cope. And Nesta’s story is a story of hope.

Looking at character development, Nesta takes up the trophy. We saw raw emotional fears, we saw the overcoming, the breakthrough, and the happy ending that she deserved. Not just romantically but with her family and also her new found family.

In other aspects, I loved how Nesta and Cassian relationship developed. It’s romance was HOT. An enemies to lovers spicy romance.

Feyre and Rhysand relationship in this book felt like closure to me. We got so much insight on their lives in the first three books that this felt right to be their happy ending as well!

Still, in my opinion, there’s so much loose threads that need to be addressed that I cannot wait to read more of these people.

I think this book taught me more about myself than I realized. It came really close to home and I felt seen.

I’m leaving this series with a heart full, and excitement for what’s coming next!

If you haven’t read this series, do yourself a favor and grab them asap! ❤️

#acotar #cassian acotar #acotar series #book review #book #books #bookstagrammer #bookstagram #booktok #review #nessian #nesta archeron #nesta x cassian #feyre archeron #rhysand

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the-wolf-poet · 2 years

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The Alphabet as my Youtube Suggested Songs

A: Attention - The Academy Is... B: Becoming Closer to Closure - Of Machines C: Cada Mes - Andrés D: Dark Days - Nihilist Abyss E: Eulita Terrace - Really From F: Foxholes and Deities - Sianvar G: Give Unto Me - Evanescence H: - I: In Circles - Holding Absence J: June Gloom - The Like K: - L: Lost Library - Omori OST M: - N: Needed to Do Today - Frontside O: Ocelot - Foxing P: Postcards and Polaroids - Sleeping with Sirens Q: Quaainterlude - Death Spells R: Rokutousei no Yoru - Aimer S: Spiral Born Black into the Upwards Night - Pretend T: Tom’s Diner - Suzanne Vega U: Unravel - TK from Ling Toshite Sigure V: Vanity’s Fair - A Lot Like Birds W: World’s End Valentine - Omori OST X: - Y: You Are the Moon - The Hush Sound Z: -

#mine #fun #idk i'm just always curious about stuff like this #it's a good snapshot of time #and what would it sound like as a playlist?#music stuff

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a-roby4896 · 28 days

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Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: Rare Vintage Emily The Strange Refillable Personal Planner Organizer Age….

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songmingisthighs · 1 month

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J U N G F U C K I N G W O O Y O U N G

I FUCKING KNEW HE WAS GOING TO TRY SOME LIFE RUINING SHIT AGAINST EITHER MINGI OR Y/N THANK FUCK FOR HR NOTICING IT WAS WEIRD

JUNG WOOYOUNG WHEN I (and everyone in the queue) GET MY HANDS ON YOU

I'm still not a huge fan of how much yeo is defending woo but considering what joong said about woo's psyche, is it possible his defence was actually meant to be concern about a similar thing? Hmm 🤔

I feel like it wouldn't be too difficult to get san and hwa on board with an intervention, especially if mingi has the email as evidence that woo is ✨️not doing great✨️

I hope y/n is right and it's almost over but only because I want everyone to have their closure and resolve this whole mess and get yeo back in his body!

(I actually dunno what I'm gonna do when this story ends because I'm so invested but rest assured I plan to stick around for the long run and offer more unhinged commentary on your stories)

- mercenary anon 🫶

J U N G F U C K I N G W O O Y O U N G

IT'S NOT EVEN THAT THE HR WAS LIKE "lol say what?" IT WAS THE FACT THAT IT WAS SO HALF ASSED THAT IT CAN'T BE TRUE AJSBJDDHDJ ODLN!WOOYOUNG CAN'Y DO ANYTHING RIGHT THAT'S WHY HIS BRAINCELLS LEFT

odln!yeo lost his body but also his brain it seems 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ he can't be this stooped but here we are 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ i mean odln!joong has a point and all but i still wanna shove a stick up odln!woo's ass and put him over a woodfire just for funsies

oh dude i think odln!san is down to reprimand odln!woo bc methinks he's just fucking fed up and odln!hwa is a reasonable dude so in him we trust 🫶

is it truly nearing the end ??? do y'all trust me on this ??? 👁

#smt answer #mercenary anon ask

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jolintsai-es · 2 months

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Nueva fecha del 2024 Ugly Beauty World Tour FINALE in China, esta vez para la ciudad de 上海 Shanghái, CN en el 虹口足球場 Hongkou Football Stadium. Durante el Talking del ACT V – DISCLOSURE 脆弱, Jolin dijo: “Tras esta gira, todos han aprendido a amarse a sí mismos, y a coronarse (como rey o reina) a sí mismos, y, en medio de mucha incertidumbre, han encontrado gradualmente sus propias razones para sentirse muy bien” Las canciones sorpresas de esta noche fueron: 海洋之心 Under The Sea, 馬德里不思議 A Wonder In Madrid, 27 愛的羅曼死 Romance, 酸甜 Sweet & Sour, 天空 Sky, 反復記號 Repeated Note, 小傷口 Real Hurt, 無言以對 Nothing Left To Say y 熱冬 Hot Winter. OS: 腦公你運氣海不錯 (Esposxs, su mar de suerte no es tan malo)

ACT I – THE ORPHAN 孤兒 01 惡之必要 Necessary Evil 02 甜秘密 Sweet Guilty Pleasure 03 騎士精神 Spirit of The Knight 04 Miss Trouble

ACT II – UNCONSCIOUS DESIRE 漠視的慾望 05 紅衣女孩 Lady in Red 06 美人計 Honey Trap (Finale Ver.) 07 美杜莎 Medusa 08 特務J Agent J 09 大丈夫 Real Man 10 Mr Q 11 愛無赦 Bravo Lover

ACT III – UNHINGED 破碎的心 12 大藝術家 The Great Artist 13 野蠻遊戲 Wild Game 14 愛情三十六計 36 Tricks of Love 15 睜一隻眼閉一隻眼 Overlooking Purposely 16 I'm Not Yours

ACT IV – INNOCENT MINDS 純真 17 日不落 Sun Will Never Set 18 Don't Stop 19 腦公 Hubby 20 海洋之心 Under The Sea 21 馬德里不思議 A Wonder In Madrid 22 OH LA LA LA 23 說愛你 Say Love You 24 你也有今天 Karma 25 迷幻 Fantasy

ACT V – DISCLOSURE 脆弱 26 倒帶 Rewind 27 愛的羅曼死 Romance 28 酸甜 Sweet & Sour 29 天空 Sky 30 反復記號 Repeated Note 31 小傷口 Real Hurt 32 無言以對 Nothing Left To Say 33 假裝 Pretending 34 非賣品 Priceless 35 我知道你很難過 I Know You're Feeling Blue 36 妥協 Compromise 37 消極掰 Life Sucks 38 布拉格廣場 Prague Square 39 LOVE LOVE LOVE

ACT VI – HEROIC EMERGENCE 內在英雄 40 舞孃 Dancing Diva 41 招牌動作 Signature Gesture 42 熱冬 Hot Winter 43 看我七十二變 See my 72 changes 44 PLAY 我呸 45 Stars Align 46 怪美的 Ugly Beauty 47 Closure to Ugly Beauty - 腦公你運氣海不錯

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sexintheatx-blog · 4 months

Link

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: ● S O L D ● J Joie Floral Sleeveless Top NWT.

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markingmachinesstuff · 8 months

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Laser Stamping Machine: Revolutionizing Metal Fabrication with Mega Long Laser Marking

Introduction

The Sparkle Laser Mega Long Laser Marking Machine has emerged as a revolutionary tool in the realm of metal fabrication. Specifically designed for individuals involved in crafting metal items, this laser marking engraving machine by Sparkle Laser guarantees unparalleled quality.

Ready-to-Use Efficiency

Sparkle Laser’s Laser Stamping Machine seamlessly integrates into production lines, offering unparalleled efficiency. The laser heads operate independently, generating all necessary identification data for your products. These “Ready-to-use” machines eliminate the need for additional connection equipment, effortlessly integrating with most PLCs brands due to their compatibility with various communication protocols.

Swift Laser Stepping Control

This Laser Marking Engraving Machine enables rapid laser stepping control of text and codes, providing instant results for your designs. The incorporation of the laser source and power supply into a single component enhances the machine’s compactness. Its versatility shines, catering to the marking needs of large or taller products.

Aesthetic and Compact Design

The appearance of this laser etching machine is not only sleek and minimal but also easy to transport. With a high speed of electrical-optical conversion, it excels on metallic surfaces. The compact size of the Mega Long Laser Marking Machine comes with auto-marking functionality, capacity, and round preview features.

User-Friendly Features

Users can easily monitor the status, integrate product reports, and benefit from secure closures for enhanced safety. The Laser Engraving Machine facilitates the creation of round parts or shapes and can print barcodes, 2D data matrix codes, parcel codes, and date codes.

Material Versatility

The Mega Long Laser Marking Machine proves its versatility by being usable on various materials, including Aluminum, Stainless Steel, Titanium, Plastic, Alloy Steel, Bronze, Copper, and Platinum. Experience efficient metal product marking with this laser etching machine.

Specifications of Laser Marking Machine

A. Laser Type

Pulsed Fiber Laser

B. Average Output Power

20 W (Optional 30/50/80/100 W)

C. Wavelength

1064 nm

D. Output Power Stability (Typical)

E. Power Adjusting Range

1 ~ 100 %

F. Resolution Frequency

20–500 KHz (Optional)

G. Beam Quality (M²)

<1.6

H. Output Beam Diameter (1/e2)

6–9 mm

I. Max. Linear Speed

Max 12000 mm/s

J. Marking Depth

0.01~0.3 mm (Material Dependent)

K. Work Area

110mm x 110 mm

L. Min. Character Height

0.2 mm

M. Power Supply Single Phase

220V / 50Hz

N. Power Consumption

~ 500 W

O. Ambient Temperature Range

0° to 25° C

P. Cooling System

Air Cooling System

Features

Portable machine design with compact size

Production Report Integration

Status monitoring and safe shutdown

Circumferential Markings (Mark Round Parts)

Maintenance-Free with low power consumption (~ 500 W)

Bar-coding, 2D Data Matrix Codes, Lot Codes, Date Codes

Real-time red beam preview ensures accurate positioning

Compatible with Surface Marking, Engraving, and Texturing

Support customized software and automation integration

Scribing operations, Surface Annealing, and Etching

Marking Alphanumerics, Serial Numbers, and Part Numbers

Marking of Logos, Schematics, Complex Graphics (PLT, SVG, DXF, DWG), and Pictures (BMP, JPEG, PNG)

Auto Marking functionality, Boundary & Round Preview

Conclusion

In conclusion, the Mega Long Laser Marking Machine by Sparkle Laser stands as a testament to innovation in metal fabrication. Its features, efficiency, and user-friendly design make it an indispensable tool for those seeking precision and quality in their metal products.

FAQs

Q1: Can the Mega Long Laser Marking Machine handle different materials?

Yes, it is designed to work on various materials such as Aluminum, Stainless Steel, Titanium, Plastic, Alloy Steel, Bronze, Copper, and Platinum.

Q2: Is the machine easy to integrate into existing production lines?

Absolutely, the “Ready-to-use” design ensures seamless integration with most PLCs brands.

Q3: What are the key features that set this laser marking machine apart?

Some standout features include its compact size, auto-marking functionality, and compatibility with different marking tasks.

Q4: Can it mark complex graphics and pictures?

Yes, the machine is capable of marking complex graphics, schematics, and pictures with precision.

Q5: Is maintenance required for the Mega Long Laser Marking Machine?

The machine is maintenance-free with low power consumption, providing hassle-free operation.

#lasermarkingmachine #laserstampingmachine

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sdnimer · 10 months

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Journal Log #01

I have been making my own private journal, but I also would like to share a little bit from it over here. I felt like, if somebody ever found this, this is the part of me that I want them to read.

AND, I can't believe this journal log has been self-harm for years! I'm happy to say I've grown out of it. So here's some refreshment on how I've been writing my private journal logs. (hence the new number) I might share more if I ever felt like I want them to read too.

1:01 AM - Monday, December 11th 2023

It has been a rollercoaster ride of information, huh? Things are moving so fast that you didn’t had enough time to process and this cause a little delay in your business.

Let’s rewind and unwind. We can’t sleep anyhow since we keep thinking about it and although writing about it out on our previous journal is so worth it, I can’t find it. So, typing on our old method again.

I liked her so much. I cared for her too much that I slowly lost track of myself a little bit. I wanted to impress her with my card skills and my only way of saying “I love you” or “I wanna keep in touch with you” is through card, and I couldn’t express them outside of my craft. This is a new territory because the new environment was because they reciprocate our feelings back, and even though in my heart that we aren’t together officially or even mentioned on the same page, I knew there will be a moment that she will find somebody else that fits better for her relationship needs.

People meet new people all the time, especially in an industry that are build through communities. You have to stand out and be in the crowd. So, it’s really not your fault that you couldn’t make it into fruition or towards what you think it should be. You did your best in telling them how you felt, because that is the most genuine thing that comes from you.

Deja vu isn’t it? With "Z" and now "S". The only problem is that they are everywhere and it is a small world. You’ve made promise that even if this doesn’t work out, way before you pursuit her, you will still support her in the smallest way you possible could in your own capacity. Let’s be honest here, you wanted to impress her on what you can do as a person. Yes and she’s totally out of your league.

Looking back, maybe you push your luck too much or you were too late. There're gaps in-between and you were too afraid to pursue since you haven’t gotten that point for yourself. Honestly, this was our very first love that we thought we could work it out. Giving her space to grow and guess she found somebody. We are gonna feel sad and we are gonna celebrate for her.

Whether it’s an actual thing that we heard, or we’ve heard it wrongly, maybe "O" was right. The closure is to not have any of it. You still have to move on. You got better things to worried about then a girl who doesn’t share their days with you, even after you’ve mentioned your interest. They say that your vibe attracts your tribe. And that Bug Hunter said, “So many lives to still impact, some still have yet to cross path.” so maybe with us stepping into our business-hood, we’ll find someone who appreciate us and our crafts. Our personalities, our intentions, and our care. Which we have, platonic-ally, and isn’t that better?

To Sop, I don’t know if I heard was what I think it was, but I had wish you would just be honest and tell me about it. Tell me gently and lead me into it. It is totally understandable that I would be crying about it, it’s a heartbreak after all. All heartbreak will go through sadness and tears. With open-minded conversation, it wouldn’t even be tears, just relief. Right now, I have no idea what I heard was right or not. And if so, you don’t have to hide, you can just tell me. I would rather have it confrontational by you then anyone else.

Anyhow, I’ve said my piece in my recent card to you, and I don’t need to repeat it ever again. I don’t need to be try hard making you liking me or getting your attention. And "J" can finally stop pestering me about rizzing you up.

Tough industry, huh? You want the best but balance is needed, silence is needed, proper structure is needed, but it is what it is. It’s a corporate industry world. You have to let it go and let them settle it themselves. Be there when they needed you. You’re a listener, only a doer when it is within your spectrum.

Although this anger can’t be translated anywhere else, we suffered a stiff migraine that was ultimately result in our 4th attack this year, I think it’s a sign to let go of the industry as a whole. Go back to where it made us feel having fun wasn’t a chore and being alive forgetting the horrors of reality for a moment. Like what we’ve said, fun and alive is what I want to be remembered.

Let’s also disclaimed that why we’re having so much anger was because of how we were in a company with their 5 core values. We are passionate in what we do, we have integrity, we hate stagnancy, we do something about it, and we give value to each other. What was missing in these cases was integrity. That’s why we’re so angry and adamant to call out since that was what we’ve been practicing for almost 3 years, and that’s what kept us strong for 6 years.

Without saying it out loud, it’s like we’re fighting against our morale integrity. At the same time, everyone deserves a second chance, and I would like to believe that he is genuinely sorry and would make amends. The only way I could forgive someone when it comes to integrity is that they’ve genuinely show results. Wow, a company really taught us about performances in another level, huh?

You can take myself out of the company, but you can’t take the values of the company from me.

#journal #log

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