#chinhands. glad to see you're going buckwild over there i'm just eating popcorn at this point

[sword-dad-fukuzawa]

OUGHHHHHH LIGHT WITH THE ASIAN ‘FAMILY OVER INDIVIDUAL’ VIRTUE AND L WITH THE ‘IDGAF’

L would 1,000,000% pretend to be disabled. I’m not even joking. If he was considered intellectually disabled and in need of a caretaker, Light would be OBLIGATED to care for L for the rest of his life. It also gives him an excuse to be living with his parents, even as a very successful grown adult, who could, ostensibly, move out and hire a maid.

Soichiro doesn’t believe in mental health but L is such a terror coming home from the orphanage, he ends up in disabled schooling. He probably just doesn’t attend high school (not required in Japan) and his parents let him, because he’s disabled.

(Actually he took the US GED while in the area for a tennis tournament, and he got an online college degree shortly after.)

L drops the bomb that he has a college degree the day Light announces his acceptance to To-oh, mentioning off-handedly that he’s actually going to To-oh also, to get a doctorate in public policy.

Nobody believes him, at which point L produces the paperwork, and the ‘congratulations on getting into To-oh’ party becomes ‘holy shit L how the fuck did you get into To-oh’s GRADUATE PROGRAM’ and Light is FUMING because THIS WAS HIS MOMENT!!! He was supposed to prove once and for all that he’s better than intellectually-disabled, high school dropout older brother! He’s never been so humiliated before in his life!

I can’t decide whether it’s be funnier to make L also drop the bomb that while he’s been handling paying all the bills for the family he’s also been, yk, paying them, and he insists on paying for their (obviously shared) housing, since ‘raito-chan will be helping me with my housework’, or if he just doesn’t mention it and makes Light pay the bills because he enjoys seeing him struggle.

"soichiro doesn't believe in mental health" is such a sentence i think i wheezed aloud. as for that last part i offer the third route of "L pays the housing bills but light finds out when he inevitably hacks L's computer, which results in a yelling match because can't light just have the good job between them, goddamn it." with an undertone of "if my older brother has so much fucking money then why isn't he spoiling me more" because i think light yagami makes a fantastic trophy wife. he wants a nice tailored suit. buy your little brother a nice tailored suit, L.

anyway misa comes in with a steel chair because i just think she would be enamoured with the fact that light is such a dutiful little brother and he's smart and he's gorgeous. but it's misa who figures out that L is probably the smartest guy in Japan aside from light, and it's misa who realizes something's up with the yagami brothers. in every universe misa stymies L and makes both him and light uncomfortable in the face of her intensity and i think her and L should have a yandere-off