#chaotic danish Gremlin

[klirk-hammurton]

Incorrect Tallica Quotes

Lars Learning how to Drive

Cliff: alright, you're going down the road

Lars: yeah

Cliff: let me finish

Cliff: there's an old man and a boy standing in the road

Lars: why is there an old man in the road

Cliff: SHUT UP!

Cliff: -sighs- they're in the road. What do you hit?

Lars: the old man, duh

Kirk: I'd hit the kid

James: no seriously....why is grandpa in the fucking road?

Cliff: the brakes. YOU HIT THE BRAKES!!!!

[klirk-hammurton]

@callsignred I'm wheezing

This is giving me "Seductive Christmas Card"

[suzie-shooter]

I was tagged by @strangesoulmates (about a week ago, oops)

Three ships:

Yassen Gregorovich/Alex Rider – has to be doesn’t it. Certainly the longest lasting ship I’ve written for (even if there was a long hiatus) and one that not only survived an entire recasting but resulted in more fic than the first time round.

Clement Novalak/Marcus Armstrong (Formula 2/ Indycar RPF). My current obsession, resulting from the Screaming Meals podcast. I was already a fan of Marcus, didn’t really know much about Clem, but fell for him in the space of minutes. Chaotic feral little gremlin, and I love him. The main problem I faced when starting to write fic for them was looking at them and just thinking “but they were both bottoms...”

Athos/Porthos (specifically the BBC series versions) – currently my second most written-for pairing on my main AO3 account with 80 fics (top is Yalex is at 89. James May/Jeremy Clarkson still leads overall at 128 on the archive account but I’ll stick with Athos/Porthos because I’m still technically writing for them). Maybe a similar pairing dynamic to Yalex in sense of “Someone will die.” – “Of fun!”

First Ship: Ever? Probably Mulder and Scully. First slash ship was Man From Uncle because I was about halfway through the first episode I’d ever seen when I went “well they’re clearly boning,” and went to look for fic. First ship I wrote for was James May/Jeremy Clarkson.

Last song: Big Black Cadillac, Roxette

Last movie: Ghostbusters (the Kate McKinnon one)

Currently reading: Bad Actors (Slough House series) by Mick Herron

Currently watching: Round The Twist re-watch, I bought the box set ages ago and finally got round to it. It includes a fourth series that I’ve never actually seen, so that’ll be interesting.

Currently consuming: I just had a black coffee and a vanilla custard danish

Currently craving: The second danish in the box, but I shall be good and leave it for tomorrow…

[neakco]

The Lost Temple Ch.4

Ao3 First Prev Next Masterlist

Where Tim debates if sending his youngest brother out to murder an ancient order of monks is unethical.

Ch.4 The Calm

Marinette explained that she hadn’t seen any signs of the temple yet. So it was decided they would consider every area covered today as searched unless the remaining sections turn up empty.

 

Their new plan also had them sticking together, just in case. Just in case of what was never mentioned but Tim was starting to think it either had something to do with gods or magic.

 

As they once again shared the watch Tim decided to risk asking a question he had dismissed earlier. “How did you untie the ropes so quickly?”

 

He watched a few different emotions cross her eyes before settling on mischievous.

 

“I have a small god in my pocket.”

 

He laughed quietly, “I don’t even know if you are joking. You are a mystery Marinette.” A mystery he wouldn’t mind taking a long time to solve if he was being honest.

 

Her laughter soon joined his, “How about I tell you when all of this is over.”

 

“So you don’t plan to disappear off the grid after returning to the monks?”

 

Marinette’s mirth evaporated, “I don’t want to return.”

 

It felt to Tim that in that moment she had removed his soul to scrutinize every sin and good deed before finally giving it back.

 

“I trust you more then I have ever trusted them.” Her eyes narrowed as she looked at him. “Adrien and I have known them for five years now.”

 

Tim was curious but he could also tell this was a very sensitive topic, “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

 

“I know, but it feels good to tell someone.”

 

He watched and waited patiently. This was the first time he felt as if she wasn’t suppressing any of her emotions and he didn’t want to ruin it.

 

“The monks figured they could control us, by the time the learned they were wrong it was too late. We were too powerful.”

 

Tim wanted to make a joke about how they didn’t look powerful, but deep down he knew that wasn’t true. There was definitely something just under the surface if you knew what to look for. Tim had spent to much Tim with those more than human to ever dismiss Marinette and Adrien.

 

“They tried to kill us when we were 16 three years ago.”

 

That stopped Tim's thoughts. What sane person tries to kill sixteen year olds?

 

“Adrien's father had just been revealed as a supervillain and arrested.” He was definitely staring, this was a lot more information than he expected her to offer freely.

 

She apparently noticed his look and understood, “It is common knowledge and if you are even half as good a detective as rumours say then I know you will find out eventually.”

 

He watched her collect her own thoughts for a moment and noticed his own were silent for once.

 

“We survived the attempt without a scratch. For a while we figured that would be the end of it. We started to pick up the chaos of what remained of our lives. We wanted to be kids, at least for a couple more years. We hadn’t been kids in so long…” She trailed off for less than a breath. “Then they appeared again.”

 

Tim didn’t realize he was holding his breath until she continued speaking in a darker tone.

 

“They took the only people we care about. Said that if we do this one thing that we won't have to worry anymore.”

 

“You don’t believe them.”

 

“Would you?”

 

“No, probably not.” He reached into one of his pouches and pulled out a card in the shape of his logo and handed it to her. “I doubt the monks will expect you ask for help. This has my emergency line and the number for Mount Justice. When you decide to pull off a rescue then you just need to ask.”

 

Marinette surprised him when she hugged him, tears streaming down her pretty face. “This means so much more to me than you could ever know.”

 

Tim, not really knowing what to do, did his best to hug her back. There was a small voice that sounded like his youngest brother telling him it was stupid to trust two teens that he had stumbled over in a jungle, but he was pretty good at ignoring the Gremlin when his gut disagreed.

 

Adrien eventually came by to tell them they were late for breakfast. Tim hadn’t even realised so much time had passed.

 

They came back to camp to see Bart already bouncing off trees.

 

“Adrien, tell me about your girlfriend.”

 

“Kagami?” Tim watched Adrien sit down with a cheese danish that had him questioning if the blonde was as good a baker as Marinette.

 

“She is as fierce and protective as a dragon.”

 

Marinette sat down next to him with a chocolate danish. Where were these coming from? Tim wondered if they could get him a mocha flavoured one.

 

“You know kitty, I am actually surprised the monks managed to grab her. She is rather deadly with a sword after all.”

 

“I am mire surprised they didn’t grab Luka.” Adrien grinned ferally. “Do you think he tossed them in La Siene? I rather doubt they know how to swim.”

 

“Who's Luka? You’re boyfriend?” Kon asked before taking a bite of…was that steak?

 

Okay, now Tim knew he was being pranked. He turned to glare at Bart who just grinned and handed over a large slice of coffee cake.

 

“Luka is actually my ex, but I still count him as one of my best friends. Enough about us, what about you three? Anyone special waiting for you back home?”

 

Bart laughed, “Nah, I am still celebrating just being alive.”

 

Tim could see Marinette adding Bart into her club as Kon scoffed, “Hard to find someone okay with dating a hero.”

 

Tim nodded, “Too many secrets. It isn’t like you can explain why you are ditching a date to run towards danger.”

 

“Or why you are late and covered in bruises, burns or blood.” Bart chipped in.

 

“Actually that one is easy enough when you live in Gotham.” Tim sighed, he really wished that wasn’t the case.

 

Adrien nodded along solemnly, “The only ones to understand are heroes and villains.” He looked towards Tim brimming with mischief. “Is it true that Batman had a threesome with Gotham's Sirens?”

 

A yo-yo flew into Adrien with such force that the blonde actually flew from his seat. Tim was up before the boy had gracefully landed on his feet, but relaxed upon seeing the toy, no the weapon, return to Marinette.

 

“Kitty, no.”

 

“M'lady you wound me. That actually hurt. I just wanted to make him blush.”

 

He watched her tuck the yo-yo away at her back before turning to Tim, “You really don’t need to answer him.”

 

Tim grinned, “I honestly don’t know. Pretty sure I deleted that info from my brain. I mean, would you want to know your mentor's sex life?”

 

Adrien and Marinette both shuddered.

 

“Our trusted mentor was 186.”

 

“and a half.” Adrien interrupted.

 

“186 and a HALF.” He watched her glare at the blonde while his own teammates shuddered.

 

Tim found himself more impressed then anything else. That was an unnaturally long life, unless their trusted mentor was secretly Ra’s. He doubted the Gremlin's grandfather was ever a monk though, rogue or otherwise. Plus, unlike said Gremlin, these two didn’t have the aura of killers. He would bet they had seen death, something in the sometimes haunted look they would get. These two had seen some sort of war and lived.

 

“Hey Red, are you still with us?” Marinette was very close and looking at him with concern.

 

“Yeah, I was just thinking.” He saw that most of the breakfast mess had already been cleaned up and decided to throw caution to the wind. “Have you or Adrien ever killed anyone?”

 

“What?” Marinette reeled back from him in shock.

 

Adrien looked like an offended cat, “No!”

 

“Well, there was that erased timeline…” Marinette trailed off.

 

“You told me I was under mind control! And I doesn’t count when only you and Bunnix can remember it.”

 

“Sorry, forget I ever asked.” If that timeline-hopping, punk rabbit was involved then he already knew more then he wanted to. Missions given to them by her were always the most chaotic.

 

In order to change the subject he pulled up his holo-map. “Working off the theory that our enemy has already searched their area.” He highlighted a good portion of the map purple. “Then this small area here should be the only area left to search.”

 

“We are actually assuming the enemy is competent?” Kon asked.

 

“Even if they aren’t, it will be a lot harder to search their territory without drawing attention.” Marinette added. “If today doesn’t work out then we can work out a strategy.”

 

Tim marked out their path in gold, “Two hours there and about 12 hours to search before we call it a night.”

 

“Unless we find it.” Adrien smiled.

 

“Unless we find it.” He agreed.

As always, feel free to reach out if you have any background lore questions. I am more than happy the elaborate the chaos.

Taglist @toodaloo-kangaroo

[klirk-hammurton]

December 26, 1963: The World Was Blessed With The Birth of This Danish Bastard. Happy 59th Lars Ulrich

[klirk-hammurton]

I absolutely believe this coming from our short king

ah yes, metallica the bisexual kings

[klirk-hammurton]

If Darkness Had A Son promo pics

[klirk-hammurton]

AWMH 2022

[klirk-hammurton]

NEW MUSIC VIDEO!!!! NEW MUSIC VIDEO!!!!

[klirk-hammurton]

Oh this is so precious!!!!

another silly larzie🧚

[klirk-hammurton]

I have like 16 requests for Metallica to finish

Incoming Rant

Of these 16 requests 2 are for Lars and holy fuck.....why is Lars so fucking hard to write for?!! Like what the fuck?!!!! I can write for Kirk, Rob and James with no problem whatsoever, but throw Lars at me and I'm somehow incompetent.

God dammit you, Danish Bastard.....why you do this to me?!!! This should be easy to do but it's not!!! Why can't I write for the Chaotic Gremlin???? WHY???!!!

In the mean time.....have some of my favorite pics of Lars

[klirk-hammurton]

In light of writing several requests for Lars....I am slowly starting to simp for this Danish Bastard

[klirk-hammurton]

Oh my, the new song is AMAZING!!!!! The music video is 🤌 PERFECTION. I have a feeling this entire album is going to bring us back to the days of Kill Em All.

Whew....did I mention James' voice is to DIE FOR??!! Like holy fuck I can't count how many times I've listened to it. I can say that they couldn't have picked a better time to drop it. It was definitely much needed.

The cinematography is BEAUTIFUL. There is just absolutely no way in hell that these men are 60 and pushing 60. They looked GORGEOUS in this music video!!!! 😩😩😩😩 oh man they are painfully gorgeous!!!!

Oh, the new Metallica song just dropped! Dunno if it was available earlier, but I just got the notification. And I gotta go to university now! Guys, the timing! ;A;

[coolclaytony]

Funfact: In the original Danish version, Chaotic: Now or Never, Maxxor was originally a crazy gremlin named MadCap. His current design has barely deviated from that concept.

Chaotic convention ad on the rear cover of  Amazing Spider-Man #601

[oodlesofowls]

ooo thank u for tagging me @mrs-nubenueve <3

last song i listened to: it reminds me of them (see current obsession)

currently watching: Link Click (im also currently reading mdzs)

sweet/savory/spicy: savory :)

relationship status: in a qpr <3

current obsession: tgcf and mdzs!! i went to a con recently and bought way too much art of them ToT also a bit of haikyuu bc THE MOVIE

tagging (no pressure ofc): @chaotic-gremlin-27 @lilyisneat @tired-o-fighter @chronically-enthusiastic

post thread was gettin long so im answering on a new thread - thank u for the tag @heysillybee <333

last song i listened to:

currently watching: idk im not really watching anything rn. copa america is happening so i'm watching that. im literally no better than the boys who go to sports bars for the superbowl. which i also did. jesus christ.

sweet/savory/spicy: im gonna be real i dont really know what savory means. sweet i think though.

relationship status: taken and it's like embarrassing how happy i am

current obsession: if i say haikyuu is that like a cop out or

tagging: idk anyone who wants to. tag me if you do it i want song recs

[klirk-hammurton]

@daddy-ul I'm pretty sure you've seen it already, but I figured I'd tag you just I case