#cgi that largely doesn't suck

[mariwatchesmovies]

狗阵 | Black Dog (2024) dir. Guan Hu cine. Gao Weizhe

[lowkeyrobin]

hiiii can you maybe do a 5 + 1 tommyinnit x reader where its like 5 times they act like couple and one time they make it official and get together?

(also can i be 🦢?)

yes oh my GAWDDD YESSS ; and yeah of course! welcome to the hotel 🦢 anon! enjoy your stay! ; thanks for requesting and I hope you enjoy! ; this isn't that great tbh but I'm proud (this took way too long to do)

TOMMYINNIT ; five, cinco, funf, cincq, 'elima

summary ; five scenarios that lead up to you and Tommy becoming a thing

warnings ; language

disclaimers ; yes I know it said 5+1, I did the five thing because I wanted it to be a repeating number lol. they all say five in different languages, english, spanish, german, french and hawaiian for anyone who didn't get it

word count ; 2k

masterlist

Five.

"I'm gonna cry, this show sucks," you speak, throwing your head back on the back of the couch.

"What is with this CGI..." The blonde mutters. "What's the budget on this show?"

You shrug. "Let me enjoy my show, Tommy"

"Wait, that Jeffery guy got out?"

"Yeah," you frown, watching as Athena runs across the screen and outside to look for the monster who was supposed to be on trial.

He pulls you into a hug as you both watch the show, being the first episode of season four. The city is collapsing, and a fangroup of a dangerous predator were sending glares to the victims.

You knew it was just a show. You couldn't help but feel bad because people did treat victims like that in real life, plus this show just made you emotional as all hell.

The blonde pulls you a little closer, having seen your eyes well up with tears.

"He's right there!"

"Athena run!"

"Oh fuck!"

"This show stresses me out too much, Y/n/n"

"How do you think I feel?"

Cinco.

"Liking sherbert ice cream is such a red flag"

"What? Says you! Strawberry just isn't that good"

You playfully scoff, holding your strawberry waffle cone in your hand as Tommy passes up a ten pound bill up to the lady in the food truck. He holds his plastic bowl of sherbert ice cream in his other hand, a spoon tied between his index and middle fingers, holding on for dear life so as not to be dropped onto the concrete below.

"Why do I ever take you to do fun things?"

"You love me," He grins, stuffing the change in his pocket before walking away with you. "I just hold a special place in your heart."

"Sure you do, pal," you reply with a smile, taking a bite out of your ice cream. "Where do you wanna sit? I can't eat and walk, not a multi-tasker."

He scans the area, landing his eyes on a bench across the little road. Thank God these fairgrounds had benches, unlike the ones near Tubbo. Eugh.

He leads you toward the bench, taking a bite from his multicolored sweet with the white plastic spoon. You sit down with him, enjoying the scenery of a million fair rides and colorful lights against the dark night sky. Screams of terror and amusement fill your ears as you watch one of the mini coasters go down the large drop again.

You feel a shiver run down your spine, the chilly wind freezing you up for a moment. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to eat ice cream with no sun around to keep you warm. The blonde notices, though, and nearly makes a joke to rip on you for not bringing a jacket. But, he doesn't.

He slips off his plaid jacket and wraps it around your shoulders. He took into consideration that you would've just gone back and forth if he tried handing it to you.

You look at him, an eyebrow raised in clear confusion.

"I saw you shivering." He chuckles, taking another bite out of his sorbet. "Just take it, I'm sweating in it anyways"

You quietly nod and lean into the jacket more, considering you didn't have free hands to put it on at the moment. You could feel his body heat from the jacket rub off on you, warming you up as it was a heater.

"You wanna go on the ferris wheel after this?" He asks, looking up at the big, circular wheel a couple hundred yards away. Lights glimmer and flicker across the sides, shining all colors of the rainbow. "The line doesn't look too bad at the moment"

You shrug, "Yeah, sure. I'll slip the guy a five to hold us at the top to scare you." You joke with a snicker.

"Y/n!"

Funf.

"I'm not jealous. Why would I be jealous?" You deadpan to your blonde friend, arms crossed.

"Cause I'm going on a date" He answers, again.

"With someone who's an asshole," you clarify once again, "Dude, I'm serious. There's a million other people you could go out with. Just skip them before they actually hurt you"

"Physically or mentally?"

"Tommy! I'm serious"

He sighs, pulling at the tie around his neck. He sighs, nearly a groan. "Why did I agree to take them somewhere fancy?"

You roll your eyes and quickly rush to his aid, turning him to face you. You loop your fingers around the tie and begin properly tying it around his collared shirt for him. He quickly feels his face heat up, making sure to keep his chin up, eyes still down to watch you work. He notices you bite at the inside of your cheek a bit, showing that you were in deep concentration.

He didn't know whether or not you actually knew how to tie a tie, or if you did it to make him shut the hell up, but he appreciated it either way.

"There," you speak, pulling your hands away from his neck after adjusting the tie a bit so it wasn't asymmetrical. "Tie is tied, Simons"

He turns to the mirror, looking at himself again. He smiles lightly, his eyes softening as he looks back at you.

"Thanks"

"Go have fun on that date of yours"

"I'll try"

Cinq.

"Just hold my hand, you'll be okay"

"What are you talking about? I'm gonna die!"

"You'll live"

"Nuh uh!"

You sigh, dragging Tommy to the slingshot. You walk behind Tubbo and Freddie, who are a few feet ahead, as they hadn't heard any of Tommy's whining. Who knew the poor boy was so scared of heights.

"Please, I don't wanna get on it!"

"I need a partner, Simons"

He groans, catching up to your speed, your hand still wrapped around his wrist. You catch up to your friends, now walking through the empty line area.

"See? No one's here because they know they're gonna die!"

"No one's here because it's lunch time, Tommy"

"Damnit"

The overhead straps click as they lock around your bodies. Tommy's already white-knuckling the handles, clear desperation and fear in his eyes. You reach your left hand out to him, looking at him the best you can past the safety harness, which is practically against your face.

He quickly grabs onto your hand, squeezing it tightly.

"You'll be fine, it's fun!"

"I'm scared!"

Freddie and Tubbo laugh, reassuring the blonde that he'll live. Something in you is still a little surprised that Tubbo was actually excited about this.

The automated "keep your hands and feet inside the ride" speech plays while the platform sinks into the ground a bit, preparing to fling you into space. The blonde leans his head back, mentally preparing himself to scream his voice away. A split second after it ended, you were shot in the air, screams filling your ears, including your own.

"Y/n/n! Help! I hate this!" The blonde screams, squeezing onto your hand even tighter.

"Look at the view!" You yell back with a smile, taking in the view of the whole park from that height. You couldn't wait to see Tommy's face on the gopro footage later, his face was probably as red as cherries. "You're okay! Just don't throw up!"

"No, no, I don't wanna go down!" His voice echoes through the air, then his screams again as the ride plummets down.

Tubbo and Freddie laugh and scream, having the time of their life, which you share with them as the blonde in between you all is freaking out. However, on the next fling up, he seems calmer and now trusts that he's safe. His grip on your hand loosens a bit, and you smile as you can hear his screams of terror turn into screams of a happy thrill.

"Okay, this is cool!" He yells over the machine and screams of other passengers.

"You think so?" Tubbo yells, "Look, there's the others!" He points out in the distance, apparently seeing the group of your other friends across the park.

"Where are you even pointing?" Freddie questions, the end of his sentence turning into a yell as you plummet down again.

"Grow up, Freddie, you're fine!" Tommy yells jokingly, trying to keep air in his lungs.

"Shut up!"

'Elima.

"What the hell is this?" You ask, furrowing your eyebrows.

"Lunch!" Tommy answers, looking back down at the whole picnic setup in his backyard. "You said you were hungry"

"I meant like, we could go get food." You clarify, "I was just gonna come pick you up, and we could go somewhere."

He shrugs, "It's food" He smiles and jumps onto the blanket, waiting for you.

You lightly smile at his dorky grin and sit down with him, throwing some Jolly Ranchers at him, which you had stuffed in your pockets.

You eat in peace, sitting in his backyard underneath a tree. You end up full while he's still munching on some fruit and decide to make a little flower crown out of the yellow flowers that were scattered around the yard. You get to work on tying them together, wanting to give it to Tommy and take a picture. You wanted to post said picture on Twitter and caption it "2020 vibes" but we'll see how far that got.

He watches you as you work, having seen you walk about the yard and gather a large bouquet of the little yellow weeds. He spits out another cherry pit onto the grass behind him, munching on the rest of the juicy fruit.

"What're you doing?" He asks

"Flower crown. I'm gonna put it on you. The 2020 era is revisiting," You answer, weaving another flower into the rope. "It's gonna be amazing, I'm gonna trend on Twitter after this"

"Oh God, no."

"Last time I asked what something was, it was lunch in your backyard, but I don't think this is the same" You speak, an eyebrow slightly raised as you look at the drenched Tommy on your doorstep.

He holds a bouquet of flowers, which are being watered by the rain dripping from his flattened hair. He's completely soaked by the thunderstorm outside, making you wonder if he really walked all the way to your house in the middle of a storm. You internally pray that he took a bus.

"Yeah, uh, it's not" He nervously smiles. "I wanted to ask you out on a date, maybe"

You blink, still a little confused and now bewildered. You look down the street, seeing Molly, your mutual friend, sitting in her car, watching.

"Is this a prank or?.." You ask, glancing back to the car, letting Tommy know that you're aware that Molly drove him here.

"No, no, no! I- This is genuine. Seriously. It's fine if not, I just, like, have had a crush on you for a while, and it's making me all confused, and I just want it to go away." The blonde answers, watching you take the flowers from his hands.

"Well, what if I don't want it to go away?" You softly ask, looking back up at him.

His desperate look for rejection had turned to one of happiness, near disbelief even.

"What?"

"You heard me"

He glances at your lips for a moment before quickly kissing you, hands on your cheeks, before scurrying away. He sprints back towards the car, where you can see Molly cheering through the front windshield.

Tommy looks back, face red as ever, "Meet me at the pier tomorrow at three!"

You smile and shout back. "Okay!"

You lean against the door, watching him jump into the passengers seat and happily smile with Molly. You're unable to figure out what they're talking about, but you use your context clues to figure it was probably you.

Tommy realizes you're watching him, eyes slightly widened, lips shut like you could hear him. You wave goodbye and retrieve to the warmth of your home inside.

"I'm going on a date with Y/n!"

[sirfrogsworth]

No. Just no.

No to all of this.

Directors need to stop shitting on VFX artists and saying their movie with 2000 VFX shots has no CGI.

This is causing real harm...

No one knows what VFX means. No one knows what CGI means. Everyone conflates them.

And regardless, all of these big budget movies use tons of CGI and VFX no matter what definitions we are using for either of those terms.

VFX artists have such a hard time getting paid a fair wage. They are overworked and undervalued and every person who thinks they know how movies are made says "practical is better" even though they have seen thousands of digital effects that were so real they assumed they were real.

Just because Marvel put a big stupid dragon at the end of a movie that wasn't believable doesn't mean CGI sucks. CGI is amazing. The artists are amazing. And there are so many amazing stories that could not be told without CGI.

Just because a director used a tool poorly or rushed the timeline or didn't allocate a large enough budget does not mean that tool is bad.

Not to mention, almost every single big budget practical effect is enhanced or altered with digital effects.

Some of the most believable effects ever created are when something physical is combined with something digital.

We need practical. We need CGI. They are both great. Respect artists.

[skarletterambles]

Just got back from Twisters!

I know the first thing everyone does it compare it to the first film, but I honestly feel they're a little like apples and oranges. Both are juicy, sweet fruit that's good for you. One's red and had an odd shape, while one is orange and round. That is, they share a lot of qualities, and the differences between them aren't inherently bad or good.

Do I like the original better? Definitely. But that doesn't mean I didn't really enjoy the second one, too.

Spoilers below.

Pros:

Glen Powell is super easy on the eyes.

The words "suck zone" were uttered.

Chickens are the new cows.

The mention of the Fujiwara Effect warmed my weather geek heart.

Excellent CGI.

Romance was less a focus in this than it was in the original, which surprised me, considering the marketing. There's a difference between rekindling a dying relationship and sparking a new one, of course, but the second movie focused more on bonds forged through emotional support than romantic vibes.

I watch enough YouTube storm chasers to get a kick out of the way the movie lovingly roasted them and that culture.

El Reno: a name that will live in tornadic infamy, even if the storm it's most known for didn't hit the town itself (thank goodness). I'm glad they used that location instead of destroying Wakita again or some other random town.

They didn't take the cliché way out and make Javi a bad guy. It would have been so easy to turn him into a money-hungry bastard who saw the other guy was winning over the girl and went off the deep end. The fact that he swerved back into wholesomeness was definitely the better way to take the story.

The tornadoes didn't growl like lions.

The characters were likable enough that I cared if they lived or died. (Which may seem like a low bar, but in an action/disaster movie, it's far from a given.)

Kate's grief and trauma were portrayed realistically, not as a joke or something she should just toughen up and get over.

The wind turbines being wrecked by a twister must have seemed a bit over the top when the scenes were being shot, but after the ones that got knocked over, twisted, and even set aflame by the Greenfield, Iowa, tornado earlier this year, the ones in the movie actually fared better! Life imitates art, I guess!

Cons:

I'm not a fan of country music so the songs didn't appeal to me much. The background soundtrack was kind of forgettable, too. Nothing like the epic "We're on the hunt for a tornado" theme from the first movie (the d-duh-duh DUDDA DUH DUH" one).

Some parts were really predictable, especially the very beginning and the end.

Ben grew on me, but I think Melissa was a better example of "character from outside the storm chasing world who's terrified and confused and just wants to survive the craziness."

We learned all about Kate's past but very little about Tyler's. I would have liked more insight into what made him tick and how he got into his line of work. I know we got a little at the rodeo, but considering how much of the movie was spent going over Katie's history it felt a little unbalanced.

Kate and Tyler's banter was fine, but didn't approach the chemistry that Jo and Bill had.

Having said that, I also felt the movie was a tiny bit longer than it needed to be.

A movie theater is a terrible place to ride out a tornado. Any large room like that is. Without the support of walls, collapses are a huge risk. (Not to mention the way the Xenia F5 dropped a school bus on the stage in the high school auditorium.) You want as many walls between you and the tornado as you can get. I understand there wouldn't be room in the bathrooms and back hallways for everyone, but having Plan A be to hide between/under theater seats made me shake my head.

At least as far as I could see (and I did sit through the credits) Reed Timmer didn't get any kind of shoutout. As a significant inspiration for one of the main characters, I felt he deserved that.

Mixed:

The stormchasing sidekick characters were more diverse, ethnically, but I didn't feel they had the variety of characterization that the originals did. They all had the "grungy truck stop" aesthetic but not that much individual personality. That might be just an effect of a first viewing when it's hard to concentrate on details, though. I liked the guy usually riding shotgun with Tyler, and the drone pilot, but they're no Dusty. (Then again, who is?)

Decent humor. Not as prominent or quotable as in the first, but still worth some chuckles.

There weren't as many in-jokes and callbacks to the first movie or storm chasing culture in general as I had hoped. The ones that were there (like Kate using dandelions to do what Bill did with a handful of dirt) were nice, though.

Was the firenado realistic? No. Was it cool looking? Yeah. Was the cool factor worth stretching credulity that much? Meh. I guess.

They did point out that sheltering under an overpass is a horrible idea, which was good as that's a widespread myth that has gotten people killed, but at the same time...the characters still did it. And then proceeded to prove why it's a terrible idea by getting sucked out by the wind tunnel effect. I get that they were panicking, but if you know an underpass is a bad place to be, why not do what experts actually recommend and get down in a ditch? In a storm as strong as the one they faced, they were still screwed, I guess, but I still would have liked to see the characters act like they knew what they were "supposed" to do.

It was definitely less cheesy than the first film. As a Wisconsin girl, I like cheese, though.

I always find nitpicks to ramble about, but overall, I enjoyed it a lot. I had tried not to get my hopes up, and this movie exceeded my expectations. I don't know that I'll rewatch it every few years like I do Twister, but I wouldn't mind seeing it again at some point.

[yurisorcerer]

A friend said yesterday that I seem like I have a complicated relationship with Ishura. This is untrue, I think Ishura sucks but has a few bright spots; that's not complicated. If there's a show I have a complicated relationship with this season it's Metallic Fucking Rouge. What, like, IS this show? Actually? When you strip away all the minutiae and all attempts at allegory, political or otherwise, what is this story *about*? Like, at its core?

With three episodes left on the clock (assuming this isn't a secret two-cour show, but I'd be very surprised if that we the case) I'm still not sure I could tell you.

Metallic Rouge has all these big-brain classic sci-fi influences that it very clearly wants to integrate into its sense of storytelling. That's why there are two competing factions of aliens who we don't really see much of until this episode, that's why there's this whole human oppressor / humanoid robot oppressed class dynamic that the show doesn't quite know what to do with, that's probably a good chunk of why it hops between planets at all. At the same time, this is also a 12-episode anime that needs to deliver solid fundamentals to actually keep people invested. Most people are not me, and will not watch an entire 12-episode series just to figure out what the fuck it's trying to do. I think a lot of people, given how willfully opaque Metallic Rouge is, would / will / have just found it frustrating. The action sequences have been good at staving that off, and I think this episode's was maybe the best yet, but I'm not sure it's enough.

That aside, yeah, this is a series that's worn a lot of hats. It's been a toku-inspired action series, a story about the aftermath of war and the mechanics of oppression, a trippy dream sequence, a whodunnit, etc. Now, in its last leg, it's become like....I don't even know, one of those 90s sci fi movies with CGI aliens? It's been better at some of those than others and I actually think this new turn fits it surprisingly well, but I am left with a frustration and I kind of wish the show would just stick to something.

That said; I can see the counterargument, right? You know, compared to most bad anime that have aired or will air this year, Rouge's problem is not that it has NO ideas, it's that it has TOO MANY, and doesn't execute them well enough. In my head, I've kind of been comparing the series to Lycoris Recoil, but they actually have opposite problems; LycoReco couldn't find enough solid ground to stretch for a full 12 episode cour, and ended up showing its ass when its underlying politics turned out to be embarrassingly basic. Metallic Rouge by comparison is hyperactive and unable to follow through on any of its ideas. I wouldn't be surprised if, rather than turning out to have *basic* politics as I've previously wondered, it just turns out to have none. Who needs themes when you have giant spaceships and can reveal your main character is an alien?

Or is it, right? That's the obvious thing, there are still three more episodes. Maybe, somehow, someway, it will find a way to tie all of these disparate elements together in its final quarter and I'll look like a fucking idiot for having ever doubted it. I would honestly love that, I can count on my hands the number of times a show I was frustrated with turned out BETTER than I thought it would, but it's always a really lovely and cathartic thing. But I'm pretty skeptical, I don't know, the fact that the series used so much charged imagery early on and has largely just chosen to discard it makes the entire thing feel poorly thought-out. I am still, in spite of myself, mostly enjoying the show for what it is; I love the action sequences, the incredibly strange bits of hyper-expressive and overfluid animation (seriously, look at this)

and I even kind of love how up its own ass it is, but I think there's a distinction to be drawn there between something being *entertaining* and being *good.* Metallic Rouge is very entertaining, but it's also hugely frustrating and at this point I would be VERY surprised if my main takeaway from it once it's over isn't just that it had a lot of potential it didn't live up to.

I guess we'll see! Who knows.

EDIT: Oh yeah, I saw someone else mention this in the tag but credit to this show for being fairly normal about a plural system. I hope they survive the rest of the show, Alice/Aes are honestly some of my favorite characters.

[reviewsclown]

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory 2005

They open it with a large, LARGE amount of CGI to make an entire factory and chocolate production line, and the aesthetic is just, so bad compared to the first movie. It's all grey and dim, this is a Factory factory not a whimsical candy place. THIS MOVIE IS SO GRAY. Something this movie does have going on is they make all the ticket winners really weird people, and kind of scary at points, Veruca at points, and Violets mother, it continues. Johnny Depp SUCKS as Willy Wonka, he's so fucked up here, just really unfunny, also I think they're trying to make him an orphan with a tragic past or something? it doesn't work. They also show some, tribal oompa loompas when Wonka discovers them in the rainforest, and it's very not racist, just extremely not racist. I do dig what they're doing with the oompa loompa songs though, they're very different but not in a bad way particularly? It's a new and cool take. No scary tunnel scene OR fizzy lifting drinks. However this movie does redeem itself in that it has Charlie reject Wonkas offer and he get s all put off and sad and lame about it, adds depth to his character that he realizes maybe he sucks.

They do say the r slur once in this movie pretty early on, first 25 minutes

Final Review: weirdly kind of good almost? Like it's dogshit if you've seen the original movie, but if you haven't you'd probably like this?

[radiodogblog]

i wrote a long rant about how great jaws was and how much modern movies suck so bad as a discussion post assignment for school but it was actually great so here it is

Jaws is notable in many respects, including practically inventing the subgenre of daytime horror, prominent use of field-of-view sliding for dramatic effect, and using a large, mechanical puppet as the main monster. 

The biggest difference between this film and similar modern movies is, in my opinion, the use of a physical mechanical monster, rather than some kind of post-editing inclusion. Jaws, and another classic, Jurassic Park, employ very large robotic puppets as a practical effect in their movies, which makes it easier for the actors in the scene to actually interact with the monster, and the effects hold up much better over time than any kind of post editing or CGI ever could. In comparison, The Meg, a modern giant shark movie, uses only animated sharks as the main threat, which can pull the audience out of the immersion of the movie simply because the actors and the monster aren't on the same page, visually or physically. 

Another of the biggest things I notice is that every scene, even the nighttime ones, are fully lit so that you can actually see what is happening on the screen. Part of this is that it is a daylight horror movie, which means that the vast majority of the film takes place during the day, and relies on writing and acting to instill fear in the audience, rather than ambience. In modern films, there has been a concerning trend of simply not lighting scenes, either due to a desire for a jumpscare-style of horror, or a drive towards 'realism' that really doesn't need to exist in cinema. This trend is made most famous by Zach Snyder's Justice League, which loses quite a bit of quality because the audience just can't see anything in the scene. 

The characters also feel more real. Modern writing in film has swayed further into a world of quips, comebacks, and "Well THAT just happened"'s than writing used to be. In Jaws, the conversations feel genuine and plausible, something that I could imagine saying or having be said to me in the same situation. More recently, especially prominent in films released by Marvel Studios, the dialog seems almost disrespectful or condescending to the audience, like the movie writers think the audience couldn't appreciate 20 minutes of a genuine heartfelt conversation without at least three funny one-liners sprinkled in to maintain their attention. The acting reflects this as well. Actors in Jaws feel like real people going through a wild situation, whereas actors in many modern films feel like they're caricatures or archetypes, not real people experiencing something surreal. 

The success of smaller-budget and/or practical effects movies in the last couple of years, like Five Nights at Freddy's ($20 million budget) and Barbie (all real sets, costumes, and practical effects) and the convergent audience reception decline of huge budget, CGI dependent films, like the trend we've seen in new Marvel productions, gives me hope that the future of cinema will see a rise in appreciation for more indie productions that rely on small groups of genuine creatives doing what they do best, designing costumes and sets, writing great characters, and the like, rather than continuing to over saturate the market with ironic sequels to sequels to prequels to movies that were popular 20+ years ago. With love, I hope the current Hollywood market dies so that genuine cinematic art can thrive over the next 50 years.

[stsgooo]

PARK IT. steve harrington

summary: a drive-in showing of alien allows for an opportunity that neither steve or the reader are willing to pass by.

content tags: SMUT 18+ MINORS DNI, handjobs, masturbation mention (f), fingering, public sex, sub!steve/dom!fem!reader, praise kink, body worshipping, making out.

wc: 3,204

a/n: it's late as hell and also my first smut ever (and first reader fic ive wrote in two/three years) so i hope it doesn't suck too much. but enjoy some pure dirt.

Your hand had been gradually moving up his thigh all night.

As the movie, obnoxiously loud and confusing in it's own right, played in front of you both, Steve remained vigilant to his promises to Robin. He wouldn't screw this date up with you, he wouldn't be "pervy", and he wouldn't go in for a kiss unless you'd initiated it first. Three plain rules that they'd both set up so he wouldn't mess up this long awaited date with you. It'd been fool proof. There was no way he could mess up a night of Alien. The movie was in no shape or form romantic.

Yet, ten minutes into the movie he felt your hand rest on his knee. You had scoot over from the passenger side and into his side, resting you head on his shoulder and just softly, soothingly, stroking his knee. It had been so soothing that he had felt almost guilty for the way his stomach fluttered with that familiar bundle. The same spark that Robin had warmed him against indulging for the night.

Don't let your other head think for you, dingus, Robin had said as she rewind a tape, watching the frames flash by with boredom. The last thing Y/N needs is you getting horny and making it about sex.

He wasn't sure if he was dreaming, but he swore that you were the one that was horny. With the way your loose dress was now pushed so far up your thighs he could see your panties, and he swore your free hand was pushing up your boobs too much.

He was painfully aware of your fingernails starting it's brushing up his jean clad knee forty-five minutes ago. For the sake of his sanity, Steve tried to ignore the way it burned his stomach, just watching with the utmost determination as a poor woman was pulled apart on screen. But even then he was still hyper focused on the way your fingers created indents on his skin as they moved, squeezed, moved, squeezed, moved, squeezed. By the time you're hand was on his upper thigh, his cock was half hard and twitching for some type of friction. Shame and guilt making him silently pray that you would let up. Just a bit.

He shifted in his seat, briefly hoping that he'd somehow release the tension in his cock. Nothing. Steve glanced down at you, finding your eyes on the screen ahead, seemingly oblivious to his inner struggle. He went to shift again when you spoke.

"You know, Sigourney Weaver is kinda badass," Your voice was low, as if you were passing a secret between the two of you. Your eyes dragged from the screen and to Steve, lips tugging upwards when you saw his hazel eyes already resting on you. Move and squeeze. "Hot too."

Your hand moved upwards once more. Only inches away from his cock and he felt like he could explode. Surely you would think nothing of him except how sleezy he was when you found out. A weird perv for allowing himself to get so easily hard for you. For thinking about what it'd be like to have your lips against his skin, your tongue lapping around his head, and your hand squeezing the base of his cock.

Think of Mr. Florence coming in with that god awful porno last week, or how you stepped in dog shit just yesterday and it got in your shoe, or maybe the smell of those tunnels you almost died-

Steve released a large breath, smiling awkwardly as he shifted again. "Uh, I guess- Robin, she-she really likes her. Something about, uh, pubes and feminism. I don't really know the, er, correlation but...there was definitely something about pubes and CGI which is weird. Not that I, uh, hate hair. Honestly, we should let women release the bushes- or...or something like that--"

"Steve?" You cut through his rambling, amusement twinkling your eyes, but something else was buried in those Y/E/C eyes.

Steve cleared his throat. "Yeah-Yeah?"

"Can I kiss you?" You were so close that he could see the specks of light from the screen reflecting off your eyes. They were staring deeply into his own, almost enticing him. He couldn't think of any coherent words to say, a simple yes or no refused to push out. He almost managed to get himself to at least move, before your other hand trailed to cup his jaw. Your fingers distantly twirled with the strands resting at the back of his head. His chest fluttered and he leaned in. "I really want to kiss you."

It was a breathless whisper, but it was enough for whatever grip Steve had on himself to crumble completely.

"Please." Was all he said in response before you pressed your lips together.

Euphoria.

Steve wouldn't describe it any other way. The sounds of battle leaked into the car, a man yelling, GAME OVER, BITCH! But none of that matter as all he could focus on was the way you seemed to devour him. The way your lips moved hungrily and sloppily against his own. Smacks of lips parting, panting, then resuming to destroy his self will. Your left hand tugged at his hair, making him gasp softly, and your tongue to slip into his mouth. Lewd sounds came from him like he was nothing but a bubbly whore at the hands of his lover. Immediately submitting into you as if he didn't have some type of pride to uphold. But you were so fluid in your movements. Like you had went through them millions of times before, consuming someone whole, leaving them a mess.

You were one of the last people to be so...experienced. But he wasn't exactly complaining. In all honesty, he couldn't find it in himself to do anything but match your pace, your movements, and give moans of satisfaction to give reassurance that he was still following. The hand that'd been possessively resting on his thigh moved up again and this time, you'd actually palmed him through his jeans. Steve released a pathetic little moan, his chest cave in, his heart beat erratically, and jaw falling open to pant.

You moved onto his jaw, giving a little nip. If he had been in his right mind, he would've probably winced at the intensity, but he was in a state between worlds. Too focused on the pleasure to focus on anything else. You kissed his jaw, gently swiping your tongue over the red mark in a soothing pattern.

"Been trying to get you to look at me all night, Steve," You whispered against his skin, breath tickling his neck as you pressed lazy kisses against it. Steve just closed his eyes, trying to calm his heart as his hands squeezed your waist. "You look so pretty tonight. I just wanted to kiss you and touch you all over."

Steve gasped softly, feeling his cock flexing against the zipper. It'd been so long since someone had wanted him. Wanted him to look at them, wanted to kiss him, wanted to touch him all over. It'd been so long since Steve had felt that greedy filthy need to have someone around him. To have someone swallow him whole and make him forget everything in the process. Steve can't even place the last time someone had called him pretty genuinely- if its even happened at all.

He placed his hand on your jaw, thumb gently skirting over your skin. "Really?" He hated the way his voice cracked. Too emotional for his own good.

You paused, having heard full well the dip in confidence in his voice. You stared at him unwaveringly.

"Really." You pressed a soft kiss against his lips, this time it was gentle. Like he was fragile and one foul touch would break him. "Thought about the different ways I could touch you, have you pressed against me. I just wanted to feel you, but you deserve more than that, Steve. Because you're just so pretty."

Steve's breath hitched as you gave a firm stroke to his cock. His eyes falling closed and head falling back against the head rest. "Oh," He whispered, his chest falling as you slowly, painfully, stroked him through his jeans.

"Can I jerk you off, Stevie?" Stevie was certainly new, but the man didn't have the mental capacity to tease you for you. Your fingers found the outline of his cock and squeezed, stroking as Steve moaned, pushing his hips upwards in hopes of getting more. "I want to make you feel good. Just wanna...get you off right here."

Steve briefly worried about being caught. About someone seeing him in such a vulnerable state. His cock out, being ruthlessly stroked, you having him in the palm of your hand like it was an everyday Friday night. His windows weren't very tinted, you'd both be exposed. But then he briefly thought of Tommy and Carol (very briefly because he'd rather not think about them while his cock was aching and you were staring at him with that dark look.) and the amount of times they'd snuck into the back of his car and got off. There was even that one time behind the screen.

If Steve died getting his dick jerked off by Y/N L/N, then he'd embrace death with open arms.

The man gave no verbal confirmation. He seemed to snap into the movement of unbuckling himself before your hands shot out and grabbed his wrists.

He blinked up at you, confused by the sudden deterrence in your shared night.

But he just found you smiling back, predatory, as you pushed his hands to his sides. "There's no rush," you grumbled, his chest vibrating against your voice. Your fingers found his buckle and slowly, painfully, pushed the metal through the loop. "This is about you, baby. Just want to make you feel good."

Steve wasn't sure what to do with himself. He'd never really had a woman just want to jerk him off and have him sit pretty. It'd always been the trailing of hands, messy and drunken limbs hitting each other, sloppy strokes on his soft cock, then they'd say the magic words: Can you fuck me, Steve? Please?

All work, no play.

But it didn't feel like that now.

Now, here he was, trying to gain his breath as you slowly worked his jeans off him. The buckle clinked together as you popped the button, then pressed your fingers against the zipper. He hissed at the pressure, a sudden flush of warmth hit his lower body, bucking upwards. It elected a soft laugh out of you and an embarrassed tinge of Steve's cheeks that spread to his neck.

It was only a moment later that Steve hissed as his cock was exposed to the Spring air.

He took deep breaths as his cock came to a rest against his lower abdomen, leaking pre-cum from his tip, and twitching at the simplest of movements. His fingers twitched to make a move, wrap his hand around himself and try to chase the sweet release. But he no chance. Not with you staring at him like he'd hung the stars in the sky.

"You're gorgeous," You whispered, pressing a kiss against his lips once again. Using the time to graze his cock with your fingertips, electing a moan from him and a grin from you. "You're so hard. How long have you been waiting, Steve?"

"Mm, I-I, fuck," Steve drew in a breath as his eyes fell to where your fingers just barely grazed him. The way his cock jumped to fall into your hands. It was almost pathetic the way his boy so desperately wanted to fall into yours. The way it wanted to be completely and utterly consumed by your own. "You kept touchin' me....makin' me so fucking- please, god, just touch me."

Your face bloomed into a small grin as Steve groaned, his hands balling into fists by his thighs. He felt that filthy need for you to milk him dry. To have you push him over the edge until he was begging you to let go. Steve wanted to hand over complete control to you. Allow you to just....become a part of him. Just for a bit.

You suddenly licked you hand, your attention now on his cock. You didn't waste a second before you leaned forward, lips on his ear, and wrapped your hand around him and gave a rather jerky stroke.

"Ah, f-fuck," Steve's head fell back and his eyes scrunched to a close. Moans passed his lips as you diligently worked his cock, fingers briefly squeezing his head, making his hips thrust to meet your hand.

Your hand was soft. That wasn't exactly much of a surprise to him, but it felt so good. Your movements were fluid, second nature. Jerking him off was like a hobby. Wrist popping as you gave a rather forceful stroke. Lewd sounds were coming from were you two were connected now. His cock giving wet squelch with the mixture of pre-cum and your spit.

Your teeth briefly nibbled on his lobe, hot breath brushing his skin, and electing a soft mew from him.

You moved down, sloppy and wet kissing against his jaw and neck. "You're so good, Steve." Your whispered, assuredly, against him. He could only whimper in response, lips parted in attempt to catch his breath. "You're so big. Can barely get my hand around you. Look."

Steve didn't even attempt to gain some type of control. His eyes, heavy lidded, opened and stared down at your work. His cock was weeping, a mixture of red and soft pink, the tip leaked with want, pleading for some type of acknowledgement. As if you saw it at the same time as him, you swiped your thumb over his slit, a thin string of pre-cum joining the rest of his cock.

"Jesus, you-you're so, so-" Steve scrunched his face, his hands flexing at his sides once more. His hips pathetically started to rock his hips to follow your movements. You seemingly made no movements to stop him, just giving a squeeze and leaning over him then-

You just spit on him.

His cock was warm and he felt like he could bust at any moment. His lower abdomen burned with the desperate need to release, allow himself to come completely undone. His balls tightened with your strokes and he pleaded with himself to just let it go on a little longer. Don't let him be vulnerable then see your regret and disgust with him.

But your whispers painted a different picture.

"Sometimes I would touch myself and I would think about you." Jesus. Steve wanted to weep. "I would think about you touching me, your fingers inside of me, kissing me all over. I want you so bad, Steve."

"I want you too." Steve whispered back, turning his head to look you in the eye. "I just want to- I'm gonna kiss you."

You offered no response as he pressed his lips against yours once again. Your pace slowed and your grip on his cock softened, but it was still very much there. Your free hand sought out his, fingers trailing over the back of his hand before you grabbed it.

Pressing his fingers against your wet clothed pussy. Steve moaned in your mouth, chasing your lips as you pulled away. "I want to feel you," Your lips brushed against his, eyes staring back. "Want you inside of me."

"I can do that." Steve said dumbly, watching your lips, wanting to capture them again. He licked his own, watching as your eyes trailed the movement. "I-I want to."

You hungrily pressed your lips back together. Steve moaning as he pushed your panties to the side, his middle and ring finger pressed between your folds. Slickness captured his fingers and he spread it from your entrance to your clit, giving a firm roll of his fingers. You groaned in his mouth, your hand around his cock tightened.

Your hips rolled with the movement of his fingers, wet sounds emitting from your pussy as he stroked your clit. Pants from both of your fogging up the windows, pleasurable condensation surrounded them. Hiding them from the outside world as they consumed one another. Steve's cock weeping for release and your pussy leaking onto his fingers.

He pressed his middle finger to your entrance, wasting no time to push inside. He was immediately welcomed with a moan passing from your slack jaw, and walls clenching around him. Steve quietly cursed at the feeling, grunting at the tightening in his own stomach.

"You feel so good." Steve mumbled incoherently, fucking his finger into your pussy. Your just moaned in response, placing lazy kisses against his freckles. "So-so tight and just.... Jesus Christ."

He let his ring finger join his middle, stretching your walls and making you roll your head back. Your strokes on his cock were pretty much non-existent now, but he felt like he was moments away from cumming from the feeling of you alone. You rode yourself on his hand, the butt of his palm brushing against your clit every time his fingers brushed against that sweet spot. A long fuck dragged out of you as you latched a hand on his wrist.

Steve briefly closed his eyes, mouth watering as he took a deep breath. "Y/N, I-I'm going to-" he cut himself off, thrusting upwards sharply.

"Cum for me, Steve."

His vision burst and should did his will. He gave lazy thrusts as cum poured from his cock and onto your hand and his abdomen. Cries of your name tumbled from his mouth in a pathetic release. The head of his cock wept and he twitched in your touch as your moans flooded in his ears. Your walls clenching and releasing in a quick succession. His fingers soaking with your cum, just as his coated your hand.

Both of you panted, lax against the seats, and eyes heavy lidded. Steve slipped his hand from your panties, pulling them back over your pussy to give your some decency. His fingers were coated and slick with your cum, his chest tightening as the events that had just transpired flooded over him He looked to you to find you inspecting your own hand with curiosity. He was half tempted to say sorry. Almost did until your tongue lapped up a large glob of his cum between your thumb and pointer. You smiled at him, tired and amused at his obvious shock.

"Told ya, Stevie, I've been wanting to do this for awhile." You turned your head forward, frowning. "But we did miss the movie."

Steve turned his own eyes towards the screen, finding that the movie had come to an end itself, and somehow the heroes had come out on top. Well, at least, Sigourney Weaver was out on top.

"Well, we were focused on something more important." Steve uttered, eyes trailing back to the cum resting on your hand. "You were really...ah..."

"Hot? Dominating? Amazing?"

Steve snorted at the words, dropping his chin. "Yeah, let's go with those."

[blazehedgehog]

The Netflix Cowboy Bebop makes me sad. What are your thoughts on it?

I don't want to be too rude to it, because I do think it comes from a place of genuine love and passion for the original anime. No disrespect was intended, and I'm not entirely sure it does disrespect the original, it just... I dunno. I'm sure everyone involved loved Cowboy Bebop, but it speaks more to an overarching problem in the Hollywood production machine.

And I don't just mean the whole "Disney Live Action Remakes" stuff. That's only part of it. I mean the fact that animation, as a medium, does not get respect. Animation is "cartoons." Cartoons are for kids TV. Cartoons are cheap. Cartoons don't have value. Value is money. So in order for these things to have value, they have to be expensive.

Just as much as Disney's live action remakes, this is also what has driven the move to CGI animation. Cartoons are too easy. You need to do location scouting, set dressing, wardrobe, make-up, lighting, you need to have camera technicians and people to hold microphones...

Or you need to spend the next 3-5 years rendering 90 minutes of film at 24K resolution so that the studio can keep selling sharper, clearer remasters for the next 40 years.

We live in a world where this...

Is seen to have inherently less value than this...

Strictly because of a value judgment that has been placed upon it. Cartooning inherently does not have value. That goes double if you're anime, which mostly don't even get theatrical releases. Even when they do, marketing for them is next to non-existent.

You pretty much only have Disney, where they hand out "Best Animated Feature" Oscars so reflexively, Disney actually had retailers put up advertising for Ralph Breaks the Internet before the movie had actually received its win:

(Sidebar: 2018's Best Animated Feature Film went to "Into the Spider-Verse." Only four other non-Disney movies have ever won that award in its 20 year history, and Spider-Verse broke a seven year streak for Disney. Also, Ralph Breaks the Internet sucks, so it's funny Disney thought they'd get an award for that over, say, Incredibles 2, which was merely bland. Spider-Verse does push the medium forward by trying bold new stylistic things, but it's largely still an expensive CGI movie, and is therefore seen as valuable.)

And this is the place Netflix Cowboy Bebop ends up at. The anime is "just" an anime, but what if we "elevated it" to the next level by making it live action?

And... they didn't. That's not how this works. Animation allows you to bend rules that aren't as flexible with real actors. This is where the claims of "it looks like a fan film" come from, because its flesh and blood human actors trying to look bombastic and outrageous (but not too bombastic or outrageous, because that's silly, and heaven forbid anything risk looking too silly).

Whether based on real choreography or not, there are subtle things in animation that make these kinds of movements more stylized. Cartoon anatomy can be pushed, pulled, squashed and stretched to strike the perfect pose. You could break that Spike Spiegel gif down right there and I can guarantee you'd find that his limbs change lengths, his arm and elbow joints don't always line up with his skeleton, and the broom handle doesn't exactly adhere to real world physics. Does it matter? Absolutely not. I once heard that "being an artist is knowing which mistakes to keep." Mistakes are literally the heart and soul of style. That's the fuel that powers animation. It's more about what you are trying to express.

The Netflix Cowboy Bebop is trying to re-express those same things, but in a medium that is inherently less receptive to that kind of expression. At least CGI animation has been getting better at bringing back the fluidity of squash-and-stretch, but the human body has real physical limitations, and the best stunt coordinator in the world can't make up for what's possible with a regular pencil.

But the stunt coordinator definitely costs more money than the pencil does.

[fortunefavorsthebrave-dude]

opla thots through eppie 5 so my brain don't explode:

i'm actually very pleasantly surprised. largely the stuff that is bad is stuff i expected and a lot of things are much better than i expected so like helleth yes we win

kobyyyyyyy perfect 100% i get why they're tying the marines in more for story purposes and idc honestly bc i get to see koby

helmeppo also good tho i could have done without seeing his full cheeks

as a fan there are a lot of small moments that really don't impact the overall story much but i did miss. like toppling the morgan statue. or sanji being present for the mihawk fight to see that devotion to a dream that motivates him to get on the sea. or the catboy being changed to a catgirl that one made me mad. but again does not affect the overall thing so w/e.

casting is so stupid spot on perfect and i've been saying that the whole time but good lord every new character is so insanely good

that said. they really desexied benn beckman. rip king.

why are luffy and usopp the only characters allowed to be fun. where is weird fun hardass grandpa garp. where is any major zoro dumbass moment. he's had a few but we can do better. oh my god i just realized jango wasn't here WHERE IS HE FUCK YOU. THE MENTION OF MIRRORBALL ISLAND IS NOT ENOUGH.

they did largely forget one piece is a comedy which i literally voiced as a worry out loud with my human mouth like an hour before i started watching. pain.

the design is largely extremely good. the costumes fuck every single time. cgi looks better than expected so i'm pretty pleased.

that said. the fishmen look like fucking dogshit i cannot take them seriously. i appreciate that they're using practical effects but my god they're so so so bad just for the fishmen.

on the other hand. enamored with the dendenmushi. they're real and they're vile and i want one soooooo bad

impressed that luffy's fx don't look way worse the only one i think looks bad is balloon and that's. tough.

kuro was very good what a little freak

buggy was. fine. i didn't love him like everyone else seems too i just think they took him in the wrong direction a touch

mihawk looks so good but i hate his accent he sounds bizarre to me

lotta brits in here i was not expecting. not the worst but like. huh.

i keep seeing folks in the tag praising the colors and how it's not dark and muddy and i don't think we were watching the same show. the clothes pop and sometimes they'll light a scene but any scene in the dark even a little bit is so washed out and bad looking it's got that netflix stank all over it like most of the circus tent and garp's ship and the final syrup village fight are dark jumbles

also why did we need two goddamn episodes for syrup village. that seems excessive. i feel like they could have cut things differently and ended up with more time for like. actual adaptation stuff.

zoro crying on the dock was so perfect no notes iconic moment

i did tear up when sanji first appeared so. there is that.

also when zoro one handed lifts that big safe. okay king!

zoro is too smart also in ways that he shouldn't be it's bothering me so much. like when he translates usopp's big wordy bullshit he does not know what those words meannnnn

that said. which way is port. it's to the left. ah okay. stands there and does nothing because he doesn't know which way left is either. also gets lost on his way to a house that's ten feet away and visible. more of this we need more of this so bad.

easter eggs so good so fun. cavendish wanted poster. island of weird animals in the end credits. certainly more i didn't catch. mwah we love it.

dialogue sucks shit also the worst element of the show is by far the writing where like the plot is fine the way they rearranged things doesn't bother me if i wanted the exact story in order i'd read it again but the actual lines they write are mostly so stupid bad and generic. every so often they hit on a good one but it's generally lifted straight from the manga.

they didn't even get gold roger's speech right. he didn't say he left it all in one piece. that's the fucking. it's the whole thing of it innit.

oh i need to mention cabaji specifically weird they gave him so much focus and backstory but he looked PERFECT i was hollering

i miss reggie tho

usopp asking a gay man and an aroace man if they think a girl likes him. they do not know bro.

also i love every shipper being like WE WON listen man i'm a shipper too and the only folks who won were the usokaya hets out there everything else is just as canon as it's always been (read: not even a little bit lmao)

now that said. opla usolu is Something which is wild bc i have never once been on this train but it hits different. not enough to make me abandon aroace luffy but still.

okay one more thing. zoro being in the stocks for 0.5 seconds to keep his job that he abandons immediately anyway instead of being there for weeks in exchange for the safety of a little girl sucks. it takes away so much of his character and feels like such a critical misstep to me but i'm also the zoro guy so idk.

anyway. overall very excited to finish the season and hoping we get more. it's surpassed my (admittedly low) expectations despite my issues with it and it's worth sticking with for sure.

[named-jiang-or-wang]

SHANG-CHI (2021) Fan Revision

In my previous posts in @welcome-to-the-cafe I posted multiple rants about the movie itself. (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3). For such a great movie, there were still some flaws, which I will attempt to correct here.

Large fish first.

I hated the final CGI fest. Not the Ten Rings battle between Wenwu and Shang-chi, the one with ugly CGI monstrosity. "Dweller in the Darkness", for a name so mysterious, the result sure was a pretty generic bat-winged western dragon-shaped bastard. Really, as soon as it popped out of the cave, it stopped being scary; it stopped doing the one thing that made it more frightening than Wenwu, which was telepathically manipulate Wenwu using his dead wife's voice. That shit was creepy! Why stop it for the climax?? We need to involve the Ten Rings themselves in its creepiness. They should be empowered directly by the Dweller and dark feelings, and the Rings should partially transfer to Shang-Chi at his lowest, most-rage filled moment.

Plus, for all of the Chineseness of the rest of the movie, the Dweller in the Darkness looked incredibly Western. I can't think of one thing it references in Chinese mythology, which was strange since Morris does! It's a Hundun （混沌）, one of the Four Perils (四凶), why not use another one of them, like the Qiongqi (穷奇）. Especially the Qiongqi, since it supposedly eats people, so we can keeping the soul-sucking mechanic.

The little bat-spawns are also poorly-designed, and not fun to watch the martial artist army fight. Martial arts are meant to fight other people, by the Heavens, not weird flying tentacle things. Why is Ta Lo's training anti-human instead of anti-monster? Because anti-human training looks cooler. And we can keep that, with a solution I'll explain after complaining about the Dragon.

The CGI Kaiju battle between the dragon and dweller was cinematic, but it eliminated the kung fu from the final fight, reducing both Shang-Chi and Xialing to boring dragon riders. The dragon wasn't really something that deserved to be a character. I get that Shang-Chi is supposed to have his 'awakening' moment, where he embodies the dragon his mother teaches him about at the beginning of the movie. But the dragon doesn't have to be "real", it should be more of a spirit that goes into him, or comes out of his heart and empowers his body. Either way, it should be more of an internal instead of external dragon. This better reflects the internal emotional conflict of Shang-Chi, his guilt over not saving his mother and then doing terrible things to get revenge; he has to let that go, accept her loss, and with that, he can let his inner dragon out. Just like...shit, just like in Kung Fu Panda 3 lmao.

So what are my solutions to the climax?

1) Make Dweller in Darkness possess Wenwu. Or suck his soul, and then take his shape. Maybe even take the shape of the mother as well at first!

2) Make the little soulsuckers transform into shadow martial-artists. They still can only be killed by dragon weapons.

3) Make the dragon a spirit that rises out of the water that goes into Shang-Chi and Xialing, enabling them to fight Wenwu/Dweller more evenly.

Here's my altered sequence of events.

The 5 humvees still arrive, the small skirmish between the Ten Rings and the villagers still happen (without the giant lions). Wenwu and Shang-Chi still duke it out, and Wenwu knocks him away. Wenwu makes the big leap to the sealed cave, and Xialing and the aunt notice. The aunt activates a magic thing that raises a giant bridge from the depths of the water and Xialing crosses over to fight her dad. Wenwu pounds the door a bit more, and the Dweller's minions shoot out in black mist, forming into humanoid shapes that begin fighting the villagers and Ten Rings.

Meanwhile, Shang-chi is having a flashbacks in the water of killing his mother's murderer, in the process, one of the Ten Rings that is knocked away during Xialing and Wenwu's fight finds its way into the water and revives Shang-Chi. He joins the fight just as Xialing is knocked aside, apparently over the cliff. Shang-Chi loses it, and fights his father more brutally, until 5 of the rings transfers to him. They whisper to him to make his father pay, and he knocks his father into the door, shattering it, and seemingly killing Wenwu. Shang-Chi is appalled at what he's done, and he collapses and drops his 5 rings. He hears his sister calling for help, and he rushes over to see her hanging off the edge of the cliff. He can't reach her, and he cries to her that he's sorry for everything. Xialing forgives him for abandoning her before, saying that him coming to Macau meant a lot, and that their mother would be proud of him. With effort, he pulls her up, while the 5 rings to his father who rises from the rubble. Shang-Chi said their mother wouldn't be proud after what he's done for revenge, but Xialing tells him that he needs to accept what has happened.

Wenwu looks triumphant at the open gateway, but a dark mist spills in front of him and take the rough shape of his wife. He is about embrace her, but she grabs him around the wrist and possesses him through the Rings. Dweller uses Wenwu's and Ying Li's voices to taunt Shang-chi and Xialing.

Shang-chi finally lets go of his guilt and stops "running away". The spirit of the dragon rises from the sea and goes into him and his sister, empowering them. They double-team the Dweller/Wenwu until he blows them back with "Enough!". The little soulsuckers return with their spoils, strengthening the Dweller, and now he has the advantage. He defeats both of them, holds Shang-chi down, trying to steal his soul. Xialing is trying to pull him away. Shang-chi looks his father in his eyes and tells him he forgives him and he is still a good man. This awakens Wenwu inside the Dweller, and in one dramatic moment, transfers the Ten Rings to his son. With this, Shang-chi knocks Wenwu/Dweller back, and Xialing restrains him with the ropedart. Shang-chi performs exorcism, deleting Dweller forever, but Wenwu is mortally wounded. He tells Shang-chi and Xialing that he loves them, and he will tell their mother how proud he is of them, then dies.

Rest of the movies is the same.

Oh, we do need to deal with the secondary characters.

Katy shouldn't be good at archery, but could save Guan Bo/Razorfist/Death Dealer in a key moment, maybe just by tacking. She could do more to counsel Shang-Chi and Xialing before their big moments.

Death Dealer was wasted. Unique, memorable design (if kinda half-assed), only to be ignominiously soulsucked first by CGI uglies. He is basically Shang-chi's primary martial arts tutor, so should know a variety of martial arts styles. To incorporate his opera mask (a full-faced one), and add even more mystery, he should be a bianlian (变脸), a Chinese facechanger, and for each face he has a different kungfu style. This could be used to semi-humorous effect, with mocking faces and angry faces. And a Monkey King face when he's using a staff! We should not see the glint of his eyes. Before Xialing runs across the bridge to fight Wenwu, she should have a showdown with Death Dealer to show she did learn kung fu even without him. They fight to standstill, until the aunt steps in and they kick his ass together. I think he should live too, and have a team up with the aunt to delete soulsuckers.

Oh I know now, Katy, Morris and Slattery should have a comical chase/fight with Razorfist. He screams "You! I recognize you from the bus! And you stole my car!!!", and he charges at them, ignoring everyone else. They find a way to beat him up, and think they've lost him, but he gets back up and almost has them, until the soulsucker bois nab him. Katy, being a good person, fires and arrow and saves his ass.

These, and some aesthetic changes, like giving the young mom a thin flowy cloth mask instead of her noisy bamboo one, would bring the movie up from a 7.5 to a 9.5 for me.

[suckmyshlock]

THRIFT STORE HIGHLIGHT

Dead & Breakfast, 2004

dir. Matthew Leutwyler

Hello and welcome to a special edition Thrift Store Highlight review, where I talk about a film I'd never heard of until I happened across it in a thrift store, thought "what the fuck?", and had to buy it. This is 2004's Dead & Breakfast.

On their way to a wedding, a group of friends take a wrong turn and end up in the small town of Lovelock. There, they check in to a bed-and-breakfast run by strange Mr. Wise (David Carradine). The next morning, the group, along with a mysterious man called the Drifter (Brent David Fraser), is detained by the sheriff regarding some suspicious deaths. During questioning, one of the friends, Johnny (Oz Perkins), inadvertently unleashes a demonic force that transforms the townspeople into zombies.

CINEMATOGRAPHY: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

MUSIC: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

PERFORMANCES: ⭐️⭐️⭐️

EFFECTS: ⭐️⭐️ with an extra 1/2 for being all practical, no CGI

WRITING: ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Honorable mention, EDITING: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Matthew Leutwyler's directorial debut, 2004's Dead & Breakfast, is the exact kind of film that gets me really excited - unapologetically shlocky, violence played to extreme hilarity, and unexpected moments of visual flair and originality that take a viewer completely off guard. I say this so that you know: though I had never heard of Leutwyler or this film, this review definitely comes from a place of bias.

Dead & Breakfast's opening credit sequence (released in 2004, the film actually has one - an aspect of movie viewing that I miss dearly in our contemporary world) features hand-drawn comic-ish panels that ease us into the type of story we can expect - thick black inks, stark whites, and pops of red - set to original music, and from the first few seconds, I was sucked right in. It becomes obvious right away that this film was a labor of love, made by a creative team. Drawings continue to be featured in the rest of the film as the scene we are watching fades into one of these panels, and then we hop into another scene, just like reading a comic book. This is one of the reasons I have chosen editing as my honorable mention for Dead & Breakfast. The drawings are well executed and fun, and create a rounded experience as the story progresses. Drawings aren't the only editing trick used in scene transitions, however - when discussing this film, it's important that we talk music.

Dead & Breakfast features a hapless cast of characters, all acting as horror movie stereotypes with an original twist - the pretty blonde girl is also a badass who can build a shotgun from pipes, the smart brunette is a linguistic expert, the asshole boyfriend works well under pressure while also providing most of the slapstick, the shy nerd becomes the villain. This opening ensemble of outsiders works well to balance each other out, but the good characterization doesn't end there. Once they reach the small country town of Lovelock, we begin to be introduced to a large group of townsfolk, and the movie starts to feel very Twin Peaks. From the moment they enter Lovelock, coming to a gas station, they find a band practicing outdoors by the pumps (also providing my favorite moment of cinematography in the entire film), even though they have no audience. It's a perfect "what the fuck?" moment, deliciously weird, and moments like this happen every time we are introduced to another character in Lovelock. The gas station attendant and the vocalist/lead guitarist of the band provide our original soundtrack, often tuning in between scenes to deliver songs of varying genres that illustrate the story so far - another reason I have chosen to highlight the editing. The guy is actually a good musician (the actor who plays him really wrote the songs) and instead of feeling childish and overdone, they are paced well enough and played well enough that I found myself heaving up in excitement whenever he came onscreen.

Let me be clear: Dead & Breakfast is not a good movie. It's shlock garbage, no doubt. With cast members like David Carradine (who has appeared in so many terrible b-movies, he has his own square on bad movie bingo) and his granddaughter Ever Carradine, plus the one and only Oz Perkins (son of Anthony Perkins and lately director of brooding, mysterious horror films such as The Blackcoat's Daughter), we really can't kid ourselves here. The performances are played to maximum effect, not human reality. The special effects, while admirably all done practically, are cheap. The comedy is reliant on random moments of slapstick that drag on so long you choose to believe that's part of the joke rather than be faced with the disappointing reality of these actors giving their all for something that just doesn't quite land. But, Dead & Breakfast is a film that's aware of its flaws, and embraces them - you can see that right up there on the tagline. It's charming as hell for someone like me, who revels in low budget, passion project horror. Is Dead & Breakfast "good"? No. But it's pretty fucking great.

[hikarisakurariver]

Avatar was a good movie though? I get that the CGI was great and all but I think it distracted people from the messages it was trying to tell. The main one is to cherish nature and sometimes the value of something isn't 'how much money you make off of it.' - capitalism sucks all in 2009. It had a disabled veteran as the main protagonist Jake, who was abandoned by the system and desperate to prove his worth and be "useful" again to others. He is fiercely independent and being bound to a wheelchair will not stop him despite what society thinks! He puts up with a lot of snide comments about being disabled and adopts an aggressive personality about it to defend himself- Message: People are people, they don't stop by gaining a disability. All his life he felt dumb because it was his twin brother who was a genius. All he knew was how to fight. He falls back into this system of 'me just muscle' while the scientists talk big words, he doesn't care to understand. Then he breaks it by learning from another culture- which has a complex world thought out behind it. At first, it's all just words and he even comments that everyone thinks he's dumb. But this time he takes the time to sit down and learn.

He gets accepted by the village, by his peers, and breaks the cycle drilled into him to just follow orders and don't think about what his military superiors want.- Message: if they ask you not to think under been 'patriotic' question it. He doesn't betray his new family, he has learned from his experiences and grown as a person, but he does accidentally cause the military to act by admitting in a private log that they won't leave their home tree. The military/ruling authority who claimed to be his family violated his privacy, does this sound familiar? Message: the military doesn't have your best interests at heart, they are not loyal to you. (btw he fell in love with Neytiri- his teacher and next in line to be a tribal leader when she marries this other guy in between this. the feeling is mutual) Then the military attacks to get the resources their millionaire contract man wants. Does this sound familiar? They even come up with a story to make it sound 'humane' we were right to do this to the savages!- Now where have I heard that before? Oh yes. In HISTORY CLASS where they talked about all the dumb stuff humanity did and continues to do. Message: those in power will and do rewrite horrible events to make it seem acceptable The scientists desperately try to stop it along with Jake- but they can't. They end up escaping and uniting the tribes together and even ask the spirit of the planet Aewa for help. (the head scientist Grace dies and while I haven't mentioned her before she was a great example of a strong female character undefined by her gender (aka they didn't make her the sexy one) and strong in her beliefs and moral compass- I loved her! she was there to learn and delighted in it, she wasn't afraid to speak her mind either!) Jake gets called a traitor to his species (*cough* country *cough*) for doing the right thing and defending a mostly defenseless indigenous people- sounds familiar. Message: don't stand by and watch. DO something or else nothing will change/will get worse.

They win and send the military home with the truth of what happened on this planet- only the scientists and Jake remain, he then passes his spirit permanently into his avatar and lives as one of them.

TLDR Capitalism sucks Respect nature Think for yourself after learning about the facts Disabled people are people first Listen to your scientists they aren't lying! The value of something isn't determined by monetary value The people in charge will violate your rights in the name of patriotism They will also try to rewrite events to color violence as justifiable so take all history with a large grain of salt. Love is love. This was all in 2009!

Matt Damon explains why they don't make movies like they used to. Pls watch.

[manstrans]

okay spoilers for quantumania if you care about that. this is more about being aware of what messages are in the movie than just saying it sucks or whatever. also I don't remember any of the character's actual names so I'll call them by either their superhero names or their role. anyway

the movie's dialogue and the movie's action and plot are actually pretty different, so I'm going to start by analyzing the dialogue which is the part that's probably going to stick with people more

at the start of the movie antman's daughter is bailed out of jail by antman, and she gives a shrunken cop car to the cops as she leaves. she says she shrunk their car to stop the cops from going after a homeless embankment, and her mom is on her side as her dad tries to tell her to be more careful. I don't really remember more about this scene except for thinking antman is a chud lol

the 2nd specific piece of dialogue that sticks out is in the quantum bar, when the grandma says she was a freedom fighter against the big bad of the movie. this whole deal is also important later

3rd dialogue is when the grandpa is talking about ants, and he says something like "I know socialism is a loaded word, but we can learn a lot-" before being cut off

4th and last dialogue I want to bring up here is towards the end, when they hijack the big bad's broadcast and basically say "he's not invincible, he knows if we all attack him at once he won't win." this is also important later

so, from this, it sounds like a great movie right? how if we all work together we can overcome oppressive regimes? that sounds great!

the problem is that the actual plot and action undermine all of this, which makes you think about why they might have put that dialogue there in the first place. we never see these progressive acts of resistance mentioned actually happen, and the plot doesn't do much to help or expand on these messages

the first thing is that like... all of the main characters are white, and the antagonist is black. and I'm not going to say that that's immediately racist, but seeing a triple A movie where a white woman with a thin nose is decieved by a black man with a big nose was kind of a weird experience. the movie showed flashbacks to them bonding until a point where it was revealed that actually, he's not so great! and then she resisted against him. I think I might be more lenient on this if it were an indie movie or something though though, especially because I don't trust disney. the rest of what I'm going to talk about certainly doesn't help!

the supporting cast is mostly people of color, and 2 white people who aren't actually good, one of them being bill murray. I want to talk about the rebels in this movie, who lived in the quantum realm until the big bad got powers and started building cities and wrecking their shit. they never moved into said cities, instead living in the outskirts and hating on the regime. it's not exactly clear what they've done except hide from the big bad before this point, but I'm still going to call them rebels because it fits their role in the movie

the rebels have two humanoids and the rest are different CGI creatures. I'm going to call them rebel leader and mind reader. this rhyme isn't on purpose

so, cool! not all the good guys are white! but there's still some stuff that could have been written better here

the rebel group is large and relies on biological means rather than technological. all their buildings are alive and fire lasers, for example. they also drank part of a red slime guy to be able to understand all of the languages, kind of like the ear worm from hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. the first words you hear them say in english are chanting "drink the ooze! drink the ooze! drink the ooze!" I loved their creatures in this movie, I won't lie, but I don't love how all of the people of color were either the big bad guy or uncomfortably close to the 'wild and lacking technology' trope

most of the movie is kind of a blur in my mind as with all marvel movies these days, so if there's more inbetween here and there that I just don't remember I wouldn't be surprised, but the next thing is towards the end, after they interrupt the big bad's broadcast I mentioned happening earlier

all of the quantum people see the message and go "hey, you're right!" and start resisting, mostly showing the rebels storming the city. that sounds great, right? except it doesn't work. one of them gets killed and they literally yell "retreat!! run away!!" as they realize the big bad is too powerful and leave. so the actual resistance had to leave because the resistance didn't work. attacking all together didn't work. and I want to ask here, what message does that send? why did they include this in the movie when it goes against what they seemingly want the viewer to internalize about the movie?

so, the rebellion retreats. they leave it to the white people to save them. but you know who ends up saving the day in the end? fucking ANTS. the seemingly-indigenous population couldn't protect themselves and needed their problems solved by white people and fucking ANTS. I'm not the only one who thinks that's fucked up, right?

so before I talk about the first end credits scene I want to ask again, why have the dialogue that conflicts so heavily with the plot? the human mind is actually amazingly easy to trick, if you've ever seen something like the show brain games you know just how easy it is. I can't say for sure, but I'm pretty confident that this is a sort of mental sleight of hand, making you remember the movie in a way it didn't play out and thinking more highly of it. basically it's just trying to look good while giving away messages that are honestly pretty terrible

and finally the post credits scene. the ending of the movie implied that the big bad maybe wasn't so bad afterall! or at least, this version of him? there are more of him from other universes that are now congregating after his death. three of them seem to be the most powerful

the one on the left is definitely meant to be egyption, and I think the one in the middle may be too but I don't know enough about the costume and its inspirations to say for sure

so, two possibilities here. when the big bad said all of the other versions of himself were going to kill everyone else but they were afraid of him, he was either lying or telling the truth

if he was lying, we still have all of the weird subtext from before. if he was telling the truth, then that means... every version of a black man except for one was evil. there is only one universe in which this black man wasn't overtly evil (but still a colonist!). and on top of that! antman got to have a ton of versions of himself, one who still worked at baskin robins and was not a superhero, that were all good guys. so it's uhh. kind of weird to me

all of this stuff might seem minor but it's the little things piling up over time that help radicalize people

so yeah, if you liked the movie I'm not gonna berate you for that. just like, be aware of the messages in it and what you may be internalizing from it

does anyone wanna hear my analysis of how quantimania is subtly racist but tricks you into thinking the opposite