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softly, gently, falling
Title: softly, gently, falling
Pairing: Castiel x Reader
Word Count: 1.1k
Warnings: Mentions of a bad day at work
Square Filled: First Snowfall
Trope Completed: Comfort Fic
Summary: After a long day at work, Y/N returns home to Cas, who’s waiting to make her feel better.
A/N: This is a submission for the 2022 SPN Christmas Bingo (@spnchristmasbingo)and fulfills Trope #19 in my 25 Days of Tropes series! I am determined to finally finish this trope list after several years of avoiding working on it. I hope you all enjoy.
Dividers by @firefly-graphics
25 Days of Tropes Masterlist
“What do you need?” he asked.
You shrugged under the blanket Cas had draped around you immediately after you’d curled up on the couch. “A new boss? More food? Quitting?” You sighed and leaned your head against his shoulder. “I don’t know, Cas. It was just a bad day, you know? I don’t know what exactly will make it feel better. I just want it to be over.”
Right now, everything and nothing sounded like the best solution ever to your horrible day. You were so exhausted that you could barely keep your eyes open on the drive home. Customers had been coming in droves, and none of them were even the slightest bit thankful for your help. Not even your boss had thanked you today, despite the fact that you’d gone above and beyond. The only thanks you’d gotten was an hour’s worth of overtime pay, but that was nothing compared to what you deserved after a day like today. Thankfully, Cas had dinner waiting when you arrived home, and now you could spend what little remaining energy you had on him.
Sighing again, you snuggled closer to him and cradled your bowl of soup between your thighs. He adjusted his arm and the blanket so that you were still kept warm as you moved, and you smiled a little. No matter how long you’d been together, his thoughtfulness never failed to make you feel a little giddy inside. Castiel had a way of making you feel special. The blanket he’d chosen was one of your favorites, as was the soup, and you knew that if you even mentioned it, he’d be able to pull one of your favorite desserts out of the kitchen. He probably even had one of your favorite movies on standby if you wanted to watch something together.
“It is over,” he reminded you, and you hummed in agreement. “And now we have the weekend together. We can sleep in tomorrow, and then we can do whatever we want.”
“Yes, we can.”
You smiled a little more. The two of you had been planning your Christmas weekend for almost a full year now. It was the first time either of you had been able to spend it away from the craziness of your families. It would just be the two of you in your little apartment, celebrating how far you’d come since this time last year. Grand ideas for vacations and friends-only parties had been tossed around, but eventually you’d settled on a quiet weekend at home. It was exactly what the two of you needed, especially after today.
You and Cas continued to eat your soup in silence, though the TV continued playing reruns in the background. He’d kept the volume low, mostly to fill the empty space, but you didn’t need it. Cas did, though, and anything that helped him stay in the moment while you were together was okay with you. You’d gotten used to the different tricks and techniques he used on a daily basis, and tuning out the TV was second nature by now.
Once your bowl was empty, you nudged him in the side with your elbow. He grumbled about you knocking his organs out of alignment, but you caught his playful smile out of the corner of your eye and smiled back.
“I’m glad you were off today. I don’t know what I would’ve done if you hadn’t been here…”
When you trailed off, your smile fading at the reminder of the terrible day you’d had at work, Cas nudged you back. You lifted your eyes just enough to meet his.
“You could’ve called me. You can always call me if you need me. I’ll always come, even if I have to reschedule a meeting or move a client to another day. You’re more important to me than any job,” he told you.
Your heart grew two sizes, if that was even possible, and you leaned into him a little bit more. He kissed the top of your head. You could’ve sworn that you fell in love with him a little more each day, and you had been for years now.
“Have I ever told you that I love you?” you asked as you snuggled against him.
Cas took the empty bowl from your lap and set it on the coffee table beside his. “I believe you have.”
“Well, I do.” You grabbed his hand before he could tuck it back under the blankets and began to play with his fingers. He watched you in silence, letting you fidget as you continued to warm up from the long walk from your car to the building. With holiday visitors taking up over half the spots, you’d had to park even farther away than usual.
You were starting to drift off to sleep in Cas’ arms when he shook you, then stood up from the couch. If you hadn’t caught yourself, you would’ve faceplanted on the cushion.
“Y/N, look!”
You squinted up at him for a moment and propped yourself up with one arm. Cas gestured toward the sliding glass door that led out onto your small balcony, and you blinked a few times to clear your blurry vision. He hadn’t shown this much enthusiasm since you’d arrived home, but you’d just assumed he’d tampered down his usual evening energy to help your night be more relaxing.
“What is it?” you yawned, blinking a few more times.
Still smiling, he carefully helped you to your feet and led you by the hand over to the windows. With the other hand, he pushed the curtains out of the way so you could see what had made him so excited.
Outside, fluffy white snowflakes had begun to fall. They fell steadily, gently covering each car and bush with a thick layer of white. Judging by what you could see from the floodlights on the sides of your building, it had already been snowing for a while now, but neither you nor Cas had noticed while you were wrapped up in each other.
The frigid cold had settled in days ago, leaving everyone with high expectations for a white Christmas, but no snow had fallen until now. Almost everyone had given up hope. You gripped Castiel’s arm with both hands, smiling wide as you watched the snow float down from the sky above. All thoughts of sleep were gone from your mind, instead replaced with ideas involving snowmen, hot chocolate, and a quiet breakfast beside the windows.
“It’s beautiful,” you whispered, and he nodded beside you. String lights twinkled on other apartment balconies and windows, creating a picturesque view from your fifth floor apartment.
You slid one hand down to lace your fingers with his. Cas hummed happily when you did, and you smiled a little bit more, looking up at him.
“Merry Christmas,” you told him.
He smiled back, then leaned down to kiss you sweetly. “Merry Christmas.”
Thank you for reading! <3
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This means dean sat his phone up, and ran back to pose 😭
#dean winchester x reader#sam winchester#castiel x dean#castiel x y/n#dean winchester#supernatural#dean x y/n#deancas#castiel supernatural#dean winchester spn#sam winchester spn#spnedit#spnfandom#spn fanart#spn#spn rp#spn aesthetic#spn fanfic#sam winchester supernatural#sam and dean#sam winchester x reader fluff#sam winchester x reader#dean x castiel#dean winchester supernatural#dean x reader#dean winchester x plus size!reader#castiel x reader#castiel novak#castiel#castiel novak x reader
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Dean: You were stabbed. Do you remember anything?
Y/n: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital.
Dean: That wasn't an ambulance, I drove you.
Y/n: But I heard a siren.
Castiel: That was Sam.
Sam: Sorry, I got nervous.
#incorrect quotes supernatural#dean winchester#sam winchester#castiel novak#plus size reader#supernatural x reader#sam winchester x reader#dean winchester x plus size reader#castiel x reader#dean winchester x reader
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Little one
Sam Winchester x reader
Words: about 3.9k words
Warnings: smut, smut, I forgot to say smut, DESTIEL BECAUSE I LOVE THEM, dirty talk
Author’s note: Hi loves! I finally managed to write some more after the crazy week I had. Hope you like it, your witch Becky
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KINKTOBER ...........-..........KINKTOBER TAGLIST 2023
DAY 5: Size kink
"Hey little one do you need a hand?" You hear Sam ask, hearing in his tone of voice that silly little sly smile you hate so much. You huff as still with your back turned you don't even turn to look at him, knowing you couldn't help but melt under the gaze of his green eyes. You feel him coming up behind you, his chest brushing against your back as you see his hand reach for the book you've been reaching for for more than ten minutes. His presence behind you almost makes your knees give way.
The two of you have been playing this game for weeks now, provoking the other but at the same time neither of you seems to have the courage to take matters into their own hands and drag the other into your bedroom. A few days ago Sam realized how sensitive you are to the size difference between the two of you. You have never considered yourself short, you have always been average, but next to him you look little more than a smurf. He is literally a giant, and that doesn't mean he is merely tall, but because of the life you lead he has developed a lot of muscles in his arms and chest, as well as perfect abs, and that makes him imposing, and fuck if that isn't attractive. You get lost in thinking what it must be like to be under him, enclosed between his warm body and his bed, but almost immediately you are interrupted by a cough behind you. You turn and see him with a raised eyebrow looking at you amused. Now the two of you are face to face, or rather you have your face at his chest level, and in fact you have to look up to stare into his eyes.
The man in front of you seems to be quite amused by this, in fact he leans forward a little, thinking you would move for that movement, and instead you stand still, not showing weakness.
"Careful little one your neck will hurt if you keep holding it like that. Maybe we should buy a stepladder at least you'd be able to look me in the eye without any trouble." Says Sam, a breath away from your lips.
"You giant asshole, I swear I'll cut your balls off if-" You start to threaten him, but you are interrupted by a new voice. Castiel has just entered the room and is looking at you with a questioning expression before shouting.
"Dean they are doing it again." He says to the other hunter who immediately responds to the angel, threatening you as well.
"Home run before you see things you don't want to see. And you two stop circling around the fact that you want to fuck. There's too much sexual tension in the air and no one can take it anymore. You better find a solution or I swear I'll have the next witch I meet charm you." Says the brother of the man in front of you, from the kitchen, making both you and Sammy blush.
"Fuck you Dean." Sam manages to say, not looking you in the eye. Immediately you turn away from each other, going in different directions.
You arrive in your room, close the door, and lean against it as you take a breath of relief.
You can't deny that there is not that sexual tension between the two of you that Dean accuses you of, but at the same time you don't have the courage to take that extra step for fear of being rejected because treacherously you think Sam intends all that as a kind of game between the two of you, but nothing more. You stay for a moment thinking again about the feeling of his body so big and muscular against yours. You felt so small and helpless, and yet you were not afraid, in fact all your brain could process were rather spicy situations with the youngest of the Winchesters. Then suddenly you violently detach yourself from the door, as your mind was again training itself in those overly specific thoughts of what it would be like to be fucked by Sam, placed on all fours on his bed, while he on top of you, with his chest pressed against your back, holding the bed keyboard with one strong hand to make stronger, firmer thrusts. You get lost in thinking about what it must feel like to have his kisses on your bare back with the light beard he has, what one of his strong hands gripping one of your hips must feel like, or his cock pushing in. You decide it's time for a cold shower at the very moment you're left thinking about whether the size of his member is directly proportional to everything else, hoping that at least that might bring you back to your senses a little.
You've never been much of a person who likes to go to parties, but you certainly can't say no to a nice evening with your favorite people spent drinking and singing your favorite songs. By now it is very late and both Dean and Cas have gone to bed, no matter how much the last one doesn't sleep, but by now since they had declared themselves to each other they had created a routine, thanks to which the oldest of the Winchesters is finally able to sleep without nightmares. You are happy forni your friends, they both deserve the small portion of happiness that fate has reserved for them, and on the contrary you wish they had fi more. Since they've gone to bed, though, you and Sam are left alone, with more than ample amount of alcohol in your system, which is a bit dangerous considering the thoughts some days that led you to take a shower so cold that even penguins would beat their beaks for cold.
You and young Winchester spent those days avoiding each other, and when you couldn't, all you could do was avoid each other's gaze and not blush.
You remain silent again, enjoying that peace to which you are not very accustomed. You are sitting side by side, and you can't help but slowly move closer to his body, attracted by the warmth it produces.
It seems like hours go by, and maybe it's only a few minutes, but eventually he interrupts that state of stillness.
"Can I ask you a question?" Sammy asks, turning toward you, and you can't help but be a little annoyed by his question, but you nod as you down some more alcohol. He seems to consider what words to use.
"Have you ever thought of anything more than this between us?" The man asks, looking you in the eye. You pause with your glass in midair, petrified by that question. For a moment it crosses your mind that he has figured out how you feel about him, but then you look at him and see him waiting for your answer and realize that he is really only asking you out of pure curiosity.
"Why did you think of that?" You ask in turn defensively. You see him hesitate for a moment as you did a few seconds earlier, but eventually he flashes you a smile, regaining all the resourcefulness he has shown in this last period.
"Oh little one, I'm afraid I'd scare you if I told you all the things I've been thinking about doing with you." He says in a rough, sensual voice, and you immediately feel a shiver go down your spine. You feel him move closer to you, while you remain still, afraid that if you moved even a finger, this whole situation would vanish like a soap bubble. You think more than once that all this is a dream produced by the alcohol in your system, then you feel his lips on your neck and realize that it is all true.
"Well you could show me a couple of things you've imagined doing with me, and I'll tell you if they're the same things I've thought of." I say in a whisper, as he continues to nibble on my neck, leaving sweet kisses at times.
"You're going to fucking kill me sooner or later." Sam comments before standing up, and with a smooth, quick movement, hoisting me onto his shoulder. I let out a soft yelp, before starting to bombard him with threats and questions.
"Sam Winchester, let me go now! Where are you taking me?" I ask, trying not to give away that just that simple gesture that showcased his strength and how much bigger he was physically than you was turning you on.
"In the room, unless you want to be fucked here where anyone could walk in at any moment. I didn't take you for that kind of person, but we could always try it another time." He says chuckling, while you in response punch him lightly in the back. "Besides, from here I have a first-class view of your ass." He continues nonchalantly, and you can't help but blush.
"Sam!" You take him back, but he immediately doesn't give you time to continue.
"Little one, don't be an angel, because we both know how many times you've thought about doing dirty things with me, and you can't even lie because it was all over your face." Notices Sam, scolding you as one scolds a child who has eaten too much candy.
"Like you had a marble mask on, and you couldn't see all the times you looked at my boobs." You comment, as you try to figure out by now where you are, but the corridors of the bunker are all dark and you can't quite get your bearings.
"It's not my fault you have particularly nice tits." He replies, as if it were a given, and you can't help but laugh at the situation. Your laughter is interrupted, however, when Sam throws you onto what you recognize to be his bed.
The playful air that had been created disappears in an instant and gives way to a new tension, steeped in passion and mischief. The youngest Winchester slides all the way down your body until his plump lips are inches from yours. The feel of his body, so large compared to yours, is even better than you had imagined. He spends a few seconds teasing you, kissing all over your face and the area near your mouth, but he doesn't touch your lips a single time, until you slip your hands into his hair and force him to do so. He smiles against your lips, and when you pull away to get some air, he teases you.
"Someone is a little impatient, what can't you wait to feel my cock inside you anymore?" He asks rhetorically, while his hands begin working to remove the several layers of clothes you are wearing.
"All promises Winchester, it's time to keep them." You say, trying to answer him again in kind as pleasure begins to work its way through you.
"You'll regret this shamelessness little one, another time, not today, but next time I won't be as good to you as I will be this time."
Quickly he removes the few clothes you have on while you do the same to him, a little groggy from pleasure and a little from alcohol.
He kisses your neck, leaving red, biting marks as he slowly moves down to your breasts, to remove the bra you still have on. He takes one of your nipples in his teeth, while the other teases it with his hand.
Once he is done torturing your breasts, he goes down to your navel with his kisses and then gently bites your panties. A shiver runs through you again as you feel his lips graze the skin of your legs, while he stares into your eyes and pulls them off with such slowness that you feel faint before long at how hard your heart is beating.
"You better get moving Winchester." You try to threaten him, once he completely peels off the penultimate layer of clothing that stood between you and him, since he still has his boxers on.
"Or what small thing? I don't think you're in a position to threaten me." He comments amused, before returning to your center, and leaving sweet kisses all around in your inner thigh. You can't help but sigh as you slip a hand into his soft, long hair, trying to take him where you most desire.
"Fuck you." That's all you can say in response, and he can't help but laugh. Eventually Sam lets you guide him where you want him, and finally his lips meet those of your pussy. You can't help but let out a moan mixed with a scream as the man squeezes your clit between his teeth as he had done with your nipples earlier. With his tongue he continues to lick you, slowly increasing the pleasure.
Suasult when you also feel his fingers join in the torture, as he rhythmically works them into you. His fingers are long and big, enough to reach all the right places, and make you wriggle between the covers of the now unmade bed, making you clutch the sheet so tight you thought it would tear.
Eventually, faster than it had ever happened to you, you feel the orgasm coming, with the impetuosity of a wave ready to sweep whatever it meets in its path.
"Sam- fuck- please don't stop." You beg him, as you continue to move your hips under his mouth to create more friction.
"Oh my little one is cumming?" He asks, pulling away from you slightly.
"Sam, please." You beg him again as you run a hand through his hair again, and he can't help but moan as you do so.
He doesn't respond to you, but his actions speak for themselves as he again begins to lick your center as he speeds his fingers entering your pussy. A few minutes pass and you finally reach orgasm, and for a second you think you lose contact with the whole world. All you hear in your ears is blood pulsing, your eyes narrowed as your lips hold back a scream, while your hands continue to cling tightly to Sam's hair. Once you regain your breath and some clarity you stop and look at Sammy who is now looking at you seriously. Around your mouth you can still see the remnants of the otherworldly experience you just had.
"Are you okay?" He asks you as he licks his lips.
"Never felt better." You answer, as you signal for him to come up. He complies and comes with his face at the same height as yours. You kiss him softly, and he can't help but do the same. It is very different from the kiss you shared earlier, passionate and impetuous, but no less sensual and beautiful. Then suddenly you take him by surprise and reverse the situation by finding yourself on top of him.
"Now it's my turn to torture you a little." You whisper in his ear before moving down to his boxers. You slip them off him the same way he took off your underwear, which is with your teeth, and you hear him cursing as you brush against his now very obvious erection. Then unable to hold back you take his member with your hands, and like everything in your body it seems to be huge compared to you, but in this case you don't really know if it is your point of view or is objective. You tease his entire length with your tongue, before starting to suck lightly at the tip, while moving your hand along everything else you don't touch. Immediately his hand, almost as big as your head, gets stuck in your hair and begins to send you further and further down, at the pace he likes best. That's how Sam begins to fuck your mouth, at first slower, going steadily increasing, so that the last thrusts you feel his cock coming down your throat, and you can't help but get aroused when you feel the air miss you. He continues this game for a few minutes, until with a series of moans where he screams your name he doesn't cum in your mouth, and you swallow everything he gives you.
"That's my girl." Sammy comments as he catches his breath, but you see a spark in his eyes that tells you you're not even close to the end.
"So far we've been playing, now comes the main course." He continues, as again he reverses the situation, bringing you under him. You feel one of your thighs open, and with his knee he stimulates your pussy. Immediately you let out a scream that he silences with his lips. You begin to kiss more and more passionately as you feel him driving his cock in front of your entrance. The moment he is about to push in for the first time, you stop him by asking him a question?
"Are you sure it fits?" You ask slightly frightened by his size, and excited at the same time. He looks at you and chuckles a little, throwing his head into the crook of your neck.
"It's just that I've never had anyone so ...great, it's no laughing matter Winchester!" You continue, chuckling in turn. He kisses you gently on the nose before answering you.
"I promise in case it does you, you'll just have to tell me and we'll stop right away, okay?" He asks seriously, watching you as he moves a strand of hair away from your face. "Besides, I think the orgasm has prepared you well honey." He finishes by winking at you. He kisses you again but this one more gently, trying to distract you. You feel him enter you, and for a moment you think you have died and are in your own little piece of heaven.
"Are you okay little one?" Sam asks seeing your closed eyes and clenched fists holding the pillow.
"Oh God, Winchester you better move your ass and fuck me before I come at this exact moment." You whisper, as you release one hand to bring him to you and kiss him. You feel him begin to thrust in and out of you, picking up a rather fast pace as he stimulates one of your breasts with one hand and his lips are busy making more marks on your neck, lest he cry out your name in pleasure. You are not much better off, so much so that at one point you feel an iron taste of blood in your mouth from how much you bit your lips to keep Cas and Dean from hearing you. You keep moving in unison, seeking pure pleasure.
"God baby, you are so perfect. You don't know how much I've dreamed of having you under me, screaming my name, rocking your world." Sam comments, before kissing one of your breasts. "I love your body, so small compared to mine, so much that I'm afraid I'll break you every time I touch you, but at the same time so sinful that I can't stop myself from doing the worst sins they ever came up with even in hell."
You fail to respond too caught up in everything the boy is making you feel. You feel like it's the first time in years you've breathed again, the first time you've really tasted oxygen.
"Sam, please, I'm going to-" You are interrupted by a kiss from him.
"Me too baby." He replies after pulling away from your lips. "Your pussy is squeezing my cock so hard, I think I'm about to go crazy." He comments, and it seems that his words are the keys to reach again that already before, only with his fingers had you tasted, but that was but a paltry appetizer, this was of the magnitude of a wedding feast. Your whole body quivers with force, as your center, in pleasure, tightens even tighter around his size, making you feel the size of his member even more.
Just as Sam's words were for you, for him it seems that your orgasm triggers his, in fact when you finally seem to have regained some mental clarity, after spending several minutes with your mind clouded, drowsy with pleasure, you feel your womb being filled with his seed, and you have another orgasm, smaller than before, but still quite important.
It is some time before both of you have caught your breath, in each other's arms. You remain in silence enjoying the warmth of the naked body of the person you love by your side. Then without saying a word Sam moves to your side and encircles you with his arms, having spread a blanket over your uncovered bodies. You fall asleep within minutes, with a smile on your lips, both of you happy to be close to the one you love, and especially happy to know that the one you love loves you back.
BONUS (I can't help it, I love bonuses too much :) )
Dean sits at the kitchen table as Cas hands him a steaming cup of coffee. He thanks him with a whisper before sipping his drink in silence. The only noise in the room is that of the liquid slipping over his lips as the two lovers stare into the void, lost in their own thoughts. Eventually it is the angel who breaks the silence.
"We need to soundproof the rooms better." He comments, and Dean can make no more than a sound of approval. They had not slept a wink because of your shouting, and as happy as they were to know that now the tension between the two of you had been cleared up, they also did not want to hear how their nephew was created, since his brother and you had not made much effort to be quiet. And this was not the first time. Since you had come out to each other now almost a month ago, every night you had done nothing but shout each other's names in pleasure, so much so that often both Dean and Cas had decided to go for a drive, but they couldn't take it anymore.
"You're damn right." Dean says before taking another sip of coffee. "You know I almost preferred it when they hadn't come out, now I'm afraid to turn the corner and watch them procreate on the library table." Dean comments amused, finishing his drink as he sees his boyfriend shoot him a look and a smile.
"As if we never did." Cas says, laughing.
"But they don't know that." Dean replies, giving him a wink, then getting up and leaving a gentle kiss on his forehead and heading out of the room, obviously checking to make sure you are not in it.
TAGLIST
@laurennnomg @deanwinchestersgirl87 @samanddeansannoyingsis @ash04w3 @l3viathanpup @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf @wafflezo @the-house-of-rose-and-ember @shodowbane09 @acidicpickle @supernatural-lvr
#hauntedwitch04's writing#kinktober 2023#sam winchester x plus size reader#sam winchester x reader#sam winchester#sam winchester smut#sam winchester x you#sam winchester x reader smut#supernatural x reader#dean x castiel
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.⋆。When They Realised That They Loved You。⋆.
Team free will x plus size reader (separately)
Warnings: smut, lil bit of angst, fluff, (somehow Dean’s isn’t the angsty one), undefined relationship (Dean), mention of scars, sam detoxing off demon blood, childhood friends to strangers to ?, heartbreak, pain, mention of torture and pain and Dean’s death, sam being sad, gentleness, Ruby can catch these hands, seemingly unrequited love on both sides, a kid being lost, castiel being stupidly in love and not knowing what to do with himself, humanity being good WC: 3.8k
Minors DNI
A/N: One assignment left baby!!
Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library
Dean- When you were the only person he could let his walls down with
You weren’t exactly a hunter but you also weren’t exactly a civilian. You were… something else. You could shoot, recite an exorcism backwards and outdrink the most seasoned hunter but you also were stationary, paid your taxes, even had a retirement fund and to Dean, you were safe. And a damn good lay at that.
“That’s it baby. Move those hips for me.” Your nails bit into the muscles of his chest as you lifted yourself up on shaky legs, then slammed back down onto his cock. Dean hissed and bit down on his lip, desperately trying to keep his eyes open to watch you fall apart just one more time before he succumbs to the blinding pleasure he could only find with you.
“It’s too much, Dean.” You wailed but continued to roll your hips downwards like you didn’t even think of stopping. His hands clamped down on the meat of your plush thighs as you tightened impossibly around his thick cock.
“Fuck, baby. I know you’re close; just come for me. Cum, and I’ll give you what you want.” He planted his feet onto your bed and thrust upwards, hitting that one spot inside you he knew made your brain turn into TV static. “Thaaaaat’s it. That’s my girl.” He cooed as you slumped forwards, your mindless babbling only serving to spur him on even more.
You tucked your face into his neck, kissing and licking at his skin like you wanted to swallow him whole. Dean squeezed his eyes shut and pounded into you even deeper. Your soft body trembled against him as you tumbled into your final orgasm of the night, your cunt fluttering around him like it was made for him.
“Dean. Cum inside me.” You managed to gasp out as you rode the last waves of your high. Dean snarled and pushed himself in as deep as he could go as the dam finally broke and he succumbed to his own end. You moaned softly at the feeling of his cum filling you up.
Dean relaxed back down into the mattress, your body a comfortable weight on top of his, easing away the pain inside him. He ran his hand down the length of your back, coming to rest on the gentle swell of your ass. “You good sweetheart?”
A quiet giggle vibrated through your chest. “I think I saw god, I am more than good Deanie.”
He rolled his eyes as he guided you to lay down next to him, his softening cock slipping from your warm walls. “How many times have I told you not to call me that?”
“How many times have I told you not to wear your boots in the house?” You retorted with a jab to his ribs, quickly followed by a loving kiss against his lips. His heart skipped a beat as he wrapped a strong arm around your thick waist, pressing deeper into the kiss. You let out a pleased sound that made his spent cock twitch in interest.
But all too soon, you pulled away and laid your head down on his shoulder.
It felt so domestic, so real. If he just shut his eyes he could almost imagine that this was your shared home; a place for him to just be without the worry of saving the world or protecting Sammy, that maybe he could have a lawn to mow and tedious chores that he would be happy to do for you. He wished he could wake up in this bed every day instead of once or twice in a blue moon when hunting had dried up or he needed more supplies from your shop for hunters.
“Do you remember the day we met?” His voice echoed through the small bedroom, soaking into the old wallpaper that you refused to let him replace, claiming that it was just fine the way it was.
You hummed and glanced up at him, your eyes still hazy from an entire afternoon of ‘I missed you but I’m not going to say it out loud’ sex. Dean cupped your full cheek.
“‘Course I do. You broke into my shop at 4 in the morning and I almost shot you.”
“We still need to work on that aim of yours sweetheart.” You scoffed but snuggled closer to him, the sweet smell of your skin almost getting overwhelming. Your fingers traced over the scars along his torso, never flinching away or touching them like you wished they weren’t there in the first place. You were mapping out the story of him without question or hesitation.
“Yeah well why would I need to do that if I have you here to protect me?” You said it like it was a fact, that you never doubted he would come to your rescue at a moment's notice. “I’ve got Dean Winchester in my bed, I’m the safest girl in the world.”
His breath caught but before you could notice, he gave you that smirk that got him there in the first place and drawled out a low: “Yeah you do sweetheart.” You visibly flustered, burying your face into his arm to escape the heat of his gaze.
“You’re always so mean to me.” His laugh bounced your head up and down. You began to giggle, unable to help yourself, and slid your arm beneath his back so you could wrap your body around him. Electricity followed your touch, his nerves sparking to life like the feeling of stepping out from the darkness into the sun.
God I love her.
The thought slammed into his chest, briefly knocking the air from his lungs. He expected a sense of panic, maybe dread, but all he felt was a sense of calm that settled against his soul. Dean just pulled you tighter against him and pressed a lingering kiss to the crown of your head. You returned it with a soft peck right above his heart.
He didn’t want to run from this, not this time. You were everything to him and he wanted to stay right here, even if he knew he didn’t deserve it. Your breathing evened out as you succumbed to some much-needed sleep.
Maybe staying another few days wouldn’t be so bad, Sammy kept telling him he needed a vacation.
Sam- When you were kind to him even after he broke your heart
Sam’s voice had gone hoarse over an hour ago but they still hadn’t let him out. He knew that they wouldn’t but still he had begged and pleaded, even succumbed to tears yet there was no answer from outside the heavy iron door.
He slumped back against the cot in the centre of the room, the sharp metal scraped against his back but it was nothing compared to the pain he felt in every waking moment. The cold concrete beneath him did nothing to soothe the burning inside of him.
“Please.” The word was barely even audible, escaping his lungs with little more than a whimper. Sam let his head fall back onto the thin mattress.
As soon as the door was slammed shut, all he felt was blinding rage. Didn’t they understand why he was doing this? The blood gave him the power they needed to help people! But when hours had passed without so much as a hint that they even heard him, the anger melted away into a sort of numbness. Dean and Bobby had tricked him into this, you had tricked him.
It was your face that he saw last as the door was shut. Your lips were pulled downwards, your eyes rimmed with red, your shoulders slumped. You had looked like you were in mourning. Guilt curled in his stomach, just like every other time he looked at you since the day he left for Stanford. But this time, the sour taste of betrayal filled his mouth like bile.
You were turning your back on him, siding with his brother when all he wanted to do was to make the world safer, for you.
Sam forced himself to take a deep breath, even as his body screamed with the ache of movement. The air was stale and settled heavily onto his chest but he was grateful to feel it, he was grateful to feel anything besides the searing pain of his nerves. This was the first break from the hallucinations he’d had in days, or weeks, time, just like everything else, had no meaning within the iron walls that enclosed him.
The cotton of his shirt felt like it was rubbing his sensitive skin raw but to take it off meant moving and he was far too tired to withstand the pain anymore. His head turned, letting the right half of his face press into the cot. The single flat sheet on the bed smelt of the flowery laundry detergent that you always used, it made something inside of him twist sickeningly.
A single tear slipped down his cheek.
“Sam?” His eyes squeezed shut.
“Please not again. Please don’t hurt me again.” He begged with broken words. He cringed at the sound of metal scraping against concrete. He couldn’t do it again, he wouldn’t fight it. Sam was going to let the pain take him.
Soft footsteps drew closer. He braced himself for the first strike. Would it be the sharp pinch of a scalpel or the burn of a propane torch? Or would it be the voices of people he loved reminding him of just how tainted he was? How evil?
He whimpered as they stopped right beside him. There was a beat, then two, then the gentle whoosh of air as someone kneeled down beside him.
“Sam.” Your voice washed over him like a gentle breeze, easing the stiffness in his bones. “Sam? Can you look at me?” He wanted to say no, to yell at you to get out and leave him alone like you did when you first locked him in here but the exhaustion in your tone made him crack open one of his eyes.
You sat on your knees mere inches from him, letting him see you in stark detail. One of his flannels hung from your shoulders partially concealing the form-fitting tank top you wore beneath it. Normally, his heart would have skipped a beat seeing you wear his clothes, but now it only reminded him of why you stopped. Bruise-like dark bags marred your full cheeks, your eyes blood-shot.
“Oh Sammy. I-“ Your voice cracked. You reached for him but quickly thought better of it, your hand dropped back down to your side where there was a bucket of water now on the ground. “You know you can’t come out yet but I thought you might like to clean up a bit, maybe eat something that isn’t dried or jerkied.”
Sam opened his other eye but made no other efforts to move. You sighed, your shoulders dropping as you sat back on your heels. “Will you let me wash your hair and change your clothes at least? I bought the softest ones I could find and even washed them in the fabric softener Dean keeps secretly buying.” Your lips quirked up, attempting some sort of reaction from him.
You looked so worn out, Sam wondered if you had sat right outside the door waiting for him to stop screaming. His head bobbed and the hardness in your gaze eased. “Thank you. I’ll be as gentle as I can, squeeze my leg if you want me to stop.”
He bit back a whimper as you guided him to the floor. His broad shoulders rested across your plump thighs, letting his head hang above the floor. You kept one hand beneath his neck, taking far more of his weight than he would be willing to admit, and reached for the small plastic cup floating at the top of the bucket.
His fingers curled around your knee, his short nails digging into the denim as you poured a cup full of hot water over the crown of his head. You paused for a moment but continued when Sam loosened his grip.
As you placed the cup to the side and retrieved a small bottle of fragrance-free shampoo, he let his eyes shut once more, this time, his mind wandering to the last time the two of you had spoken.
It had been in the days after Dean died. You refused to break down in the face of losing your best friend, the man that taught you to drive, to throw a proper punch. You wanted to stay strong for Sam and for Bobby but Sam knew it wouldn’t last long.
You had been slowly, methodically cleaning Baby, just like Dean taught you to when the younger Winchester approached you with a bowed head and a duffle bag on his shoulder. Just like the day he left for college.
You didn’t wait for his excuses.
“You’re leaving?” You said but it didn’t sound like you, not really. Sam didn’t answer and you scoffed, throwing the sponge you’d been using onto the dusty driveway. “Just like that, running off days after-“ Your breath caught but you swallowed down your tears, “What are you planning, Sam? You know selling your soul won’t work, we’ve already tried that.”
Sam huffed and pulled the strap of the bag higher on his shoulder. “I’ve got a friend who might know a way to get him back.”
He should’ve seen the way your back straightened as your body went stiff. “A ‘friend’?”
“She knows a lot about hell and right now I’ll try anything to bring him back.” And then he did something truly stupid. “Unlike you.”
Silence crashed down around you like a falling building, immediately filling the air with a tension so thick Sam could almost choke on it. He watched your shoulders draw up, your hackles raised before your chest expanded fully and you exhaled through your nose.
“Then I won’t stop you. I trust you Sam but I don’t trust Ruby and I won’t be around forever to fix up your messes, not anymore. I’m worth a hell of a lot more than just being the girl you always leave behind but keep running back to.” You fished Baby’s keys from your front pocket, tossing them at Sam as you passed.
“Ruby’s dead.”
“Is she?” You shot him a look before opening Bobby’s front door. “Don’t get yourself killed. Lose my number.” The door slammed behind you and suddenly Sam felt like he was making the wrong decision, again.
You ran a hand through his hair, letting the shampoo run through your fingers as you carefully washed it away with the lukewarm water and with it, you washed away his pain. He turned his head into your hand, soaking up every ounce of touch you were willing to give him. It’d been so long since he had felt anything other than lust or hurt pressed to his body.
You refused to meet his gaze, not that he could blame you after everything he had done, but he wanted so badly to look into those perfect e/c’s even just one more time. To feel that peace and acceptance that had always swirled within the deep colour of your irises.
Suddenly, all Sam wanted to do was curl up in your lap and cry. He’d spent so many years taking your warmth for granted and now, after months of being denied even a sliver of your presence, he couldn’t imagine ever being away from you again. He wanted to prove to you that you were worth staying for, you were worth everything to him, but all he could do was let you care for him with hesitant hands.
He loved you, he always had, even when he was trying to run away from his life, even as he fell in love with someone else. It was you that kept him from falling into that well of darkness that would be so easy to slip into. You with your sass and your gentleness, your softness and your bite, your laughter and your grief. He loved you.
But how could you ever love him back?
Castiel- When you made him remember why he loved humanity in the first place
It was the sound of crying that drew Castiel to the playground across the street from the motel you had been camped out at. It wasn’t an unfamiliar sound to the angel given his age and how many prayers he’d heard throughout his existence, but the pitch was so high, so truly filled with fear that he didn’t hesitate to follow it.
“Angel? Where are you going?” He glanced back at you as you were pulling on your boots.
“There’s crying.” He said simply before descending the concrete steps to the ground floor. You let out a noise like a scoff and scrambled after him, barely grabbing the room key and your hunting knife before the heavy door slammed shut.
“Cas!” His pace didn’t falter as the crying picked up in intensity but he was confident you were following close behind him. His blue eyes flicked over the colourful plastic structures, expecting some siren or ghost to pop out at him. The weight of the angle blade against his forearm and your steady footsteps behind him reminded Castiel that he would not fight this battle alone.
He slowly rounded the bright yellow twisty slide just as you skidded to a halt a step behind him. Thankfully, you remained silent, a palm pressed to his back to remind him that you had him covered. The crying was louder now, though it did not sound like it was from any creature he had encountered before.
There was a shadow at the edge of the monkey bars. Castiel’s blade dropped silently from his sleeve, sliding perfectly into his grip. He took a single stride forwards, ready to attack before it could when your fingers suddenly snagged the back of his trenchcoat.
“It’s a kid.” You breathed, he imagined it was out of relief but your human emotions always confused him. You slid the knife into the sheath you kept at the small of your back, tugging down your shirt so it was completely hidden as you cautiously approached the small figure curled up in the wood chips.
“Hi sweetie, are you ok?” Your voice dripped with sweetness, like he remembered syrup to taste like. You leaned forwards, your shoulders dropped as low as they could go.
The crying stopped but small hiccups still echoed through the maze of playground structures. The sun had been steadily setting and now sat just above the horizon, the darkness creeping in.
Castiel watched closely as you squatted a foot away from the child, a soft smile on your face. “Are you lost?” The child finally looked up, their eyes wide and sparkling with tears in the low light of the evening. They nodded.
“Can we help you find your parents?” Their nodding got quicker and they reached out their arms to you. Your smile grew wider as you stood up, easily pulling them up and resting them on your wide hip. You turned back to face Castiel, a hand rubbing up and down the child’s back.
They must’ve been only 4 or 5 and wearing an outfit that was far from appropriate for the dropping temperature. “We’re going to go to the police station, I bet your parents are waiting there for you.” They looked up at you, still silent, but now clinging to your t-shirt in a way that made Castiel’s heart inexplicably skip a beat.
“This is my friend Cas,” You leaned closer to their little ear and loudly whispered the next part, “He’s an angel.” The child’s eyes widened and their head snapped around to look at him. Cas stepped closer, the child didn’t flinch.
“I am and so is she, that’s how she was able to find you.” He could almost feel the heat from your cheeks even feet away but still the child seemed convinced.
“Really?” You hiked them up higher on your hip, your arm wrapping tighter around their little body to keep them warm.
“Really really. Now why don’t we get you back home?” They rested their head beneath your jaw and nodded, snuggling closer to your soft body.
Cas dutifully followed you as you walked out of the park, watching the child bounce with each of your steps. You chattered away about things you were seeing around the street, your voice filling the silence like a white noise machine. Cas could feel the calmness radiating from the child and it warmed something long forgotten inside of him.
You had no duty to this child, nor any other person that you saved and he knew that you would receive no thanks for your actions but yet you still did them. You threw yourself into harm’s way to protect complete strangers from things they could not possibly understand. You had once confided in the angel that you had been pressured into hunting but you had stopped trying to run away from it long ago.
He’d felt anger for you, just the same as he felt for the Winchesters and all the other unfortunate children who never had a choice. He felt angry for himself, at humanity.
But seeing you now, caring for this child like they were your own, Castiel understood why you stayed. You didn’t do it for the glory of saying you saved the world, nor for some duty bestowed to you by your parents, it was because you cared and because you knew what evil was.
The near empty streets soon gave way to rows of shops and townhouses, leading directly to the lit up police station only a few blocks away. The child started to fidget against you as they began to recognise their surroundings, making you laugh quietly. “I know sweetie! We’re almost there. You’re so close.”
You came to a stop right at the entrance. “You can go right in and tell them your name and that you were lost.” They nodded dutifully while you carefully lowered them to their feet. “Ok sweetie, you were so brave today but make sure you stay with your parents next time.” You ran a hand over their head and stod to your full height.
They looked at you and Castiel before gracing you with a toothy grin. “Thank you nice angels!” Then they threw open the glass door and rushed inside just as two grown ups turned the corner behind the reception desk. They fell to their knees, catching the little one in their arms.
Something warm brushed the side of his hand, making Castiel tear his eyes away from the scene in front of him. You took his hand into your own, your eyes shimmering with tears. You didn’t say anything and he found that no words were needed.
Tomorrow, he would tell you how incredible you were, that you were what angels should be and that he was feeling something for you that he never thought he could ever experience. But for right now, he wanted to watch this child reunite with the people that loved them most while the chill of the night and the monsters in it were kept at bay by the brilliance of your soul.
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Y/N on the phone with Charlie: "So got an offer from someone on the internet to be their sugar baby"
Charlie: "Really? How much was he paying?"
Y/N: "$1500 and all I have to do is send photos of my feet"
Charlie: "Are you going to do it?"
Y/N: "No seems kinda hinky you know"
Hours later Dean comes back looking for Castiel, walks into Y/N's room
Dean: "What's going on in here?"
Castiel looking up while Y/N paints his toes a bright red, both blushing
Castiel: "I'm going to make Y/N money by being her glucose infant"
Y/N laughing, while Dean looks confused
#incorrect supernatural quotes#supernatural incorrect quotes#spn#dean winchester#dean winchester fluff#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#dean winchester x female!reader#dean winchester x plus size reader#charlie supernatural#castiel novak
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Hello :) i wanted to know how the SPN boys would react to a plus sized reader? like big boned and curvy?
Plus-Sized reader (SPN pref!)
a/n: as a chubby girl i’ve been so excited to write this!!! i hope you enjoy babes!!!
warnings: plus size reader, i guess slightly suggestive, some tiny angst!
Dean:
dean LOVES your body so much
your thighs are like MMMMHMMMH
and your hip dips are like AHAHHHHHHH
and when you two lay together and he can feel where your side kind of rolls in on itself
he falls in love even more
he seriously thinks you’re the most beautiful person
he def buys you lingere so you can model for him
“pleaseeeee? your curves would look beautiful, sweetheart.”
if you ever feel bad about yourself he will get so sad
"You don't deserve to hate yourself. If you can't learn to appreciate yourself, then let me love you."
he loves you and your curves so much
his seritonin
your stretch marks make dean go fucking crazy
—
Sam:
sam fucking ADORES every BIT of you
he can pick you up idc
have you SEEN his muscles?
let him give you piggy back rides and hold you like a bride because he loves it
he loves your whole being
he insists you’re the little spoon so he can feel your whole body against his
he gives you hickeys all over your thighs because they’re just so soft and amazing and his favorite ever
if you ever feel bad about yourself he will just “no.”
"I hate seeing you upset. Don't... don't do this to yourself. I love you,"
he never wants you to doubt yourself
ever
but if you do
you better talk to him
—
Castiel:
worships you
all the time
he cuddles into your body 24/7/365
your curves are like heaven to him
he’ll trace your figure with his hands and fingers all the time
“you are gorgeous, my beautiful y/n.”
he just loves you so much
every inch
he dosent understand when you talk bad about yourself
he’s like “wtf you’re so gorgeous… did i miss something?”
he gets sad for you because he wishes you could see yourself how he sees you
“y/n… you are the most amazing person i’ve ever met. your looks are some of gods best work. please, do not doubt yourself again.”
—
Crowley:
crowley loves himself a chubby person
he’s just so mesmerized
if you EVER wear fishnets or cropped clothes or anything
he’s on his knees in a SECOND
like i’m so fr
he gets life from looking at and feeling your body
knowing you’re his???
amazing.
he hates it when you talk bad about yourself
stretch marks??? babe. everyone has them. yours are so cute
cellulite? just a map of where you’ve been. it’s gorgeous
Hip dips???? lemmie grab them while i fuck you senseless!!! so so so so so pretty!
he just loves every inch of your pretty body
he buys you clothes that show off more of you
#love u mwah#thank you sm for this request#dean winchester#sam winchester#dean winchester x reader#sam winchester x reader#castiel#castiel x reader#crowley#crowley x reader#dean winchester x you#dean winchester supernatural#dean winchester x y/n#sam winchester supernatural#sam winchester imagine#sam spn#castiel supernatural#crowley supernatural#plus size reader#<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
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Dating Dean Winchester Headcanons <3
No one asked for this, but I am going to write about it anyway because I am THIRSTY for some Dean Winchester...feel free to send me requests for dean or any spn character. I will take a look at those asap. Also, this goes without saying but, minors dni, NSFW WILL be mentioned under. You have been warned :)
Long road trips in the impala, classic rock 24/7. You both would be singing to every single song. While Sam does anything possible to get you both to shut up.
Constant jokes, pranks, and teasing.
You guys would often make bets on what monster you would be hunting, but jokes on you both. Sam was always right.
Dean was a man that loved physical touch, as soon as you give him the A-okay. His hands never leave you... and I mean that.
Forehead kisses, cheek kisses, hand kisses... you get them ALL.
This man loves to hug you, wrapping his arms around your waist and putting his head on your shoulder no matter what you are doing or where you at. He will find a way to hug you somehow.
He loved to show his love for you in any way he could, cooking, rubbing your back, and maybe something else ;) He wanted to let you know how much you mean to him.
Baking pies together <3
Dean was an ASS man, his hand would never leave your ass in public. He would always have his hand on top of it, so everyone in the vicinity would know you were his. Don't worry he would slap it too if anyone was looking.
oh, man if anyone was looking... you were in for a treat.
"He thinks it's okay to keep eyeing you...I'm gonna prove to him your mine."
He would get jealous quick... even over something so small.
Dean is also very protective of you...he would fight, lie or even die for you, and when ANYONE made googly eyes at you. He was ready to show everyone you're his girl.
"What do you say, sweetheart, let's show this fool your mine."
"Please..."
Dean could quickly become a Dom or Sub depending on your mood, his, or the situation.
But, fucking him was a perfect combo of filthy and sweet.
This man would have his head between your legs and his fingers inside, keeping eye contact and making you watch while he fingers you.
"C'mon sweetheart, moan for me... let them all hear how good I make you feel just with my fingers... we haven't even got to the good part yet."
"Please...fuck me, Dean... stop teasing"
"Yes, ma'am"
He could spend the rest of his life making you moan for him.
But, remember when I said he was an ass man? He loves taking you from behind... holding your head back. One hand around your neck, while whispering dirty things into your ears.
"Just like that...moan out loud for me"
He also went crazy when you rode him, thrusting up into you when you went too slow or just watching your face take him.
you + him +impala = dean's in heaven, mainly when you were on top of him.
"Ride me just like that, you're doing so well baby"
He would also ensure that everyone knows that he did it if you can't walk well the next day. Was because of him
He absolutely loves aftercare too.
He would make a bath for the both of you, cook you anything you wanted, and cuddle until you both fell asleep watching any show that made you happy.
When he went out for hunts, he would always think about you. Are you eating enough, are you sleeping well, are you okay? His questions would spin in his head the entire time. For once he wishes monsters didn't exist or took a break so he could spend time with you.
He would call you at LEAST twice a day to check-in on how you were doing.
Dean was absolutely in love with you, to the point that he would rant to Sam on how much he did love you and that he was afraid you would leave one day or that he would not be there to save you.
"But what happens if I can't make it in time or if she leaves?"
"Dean, she can handle herself. Plus, she loves you and if you can't see that you an idiot."
This man was head over heels for you, he would do anything for you and I mean anything for you. He even thought of retiring from the family business and start a life with you.
Maybe some day, he will make that a reality.
#dean winchester#spn#spn fandom#supernatural#supernatural smut#supernatural imagine#deanwinchester#supernatural headcanon#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x plus size reader#dean winchester x female!reader#sam winchester#dating dean winchester would include#dating sam Winchester would include#castiel#dean winchester preference#dean winchester smut#dean winchester angst#dean winchester one shot#dean winchester imagine#dean winchester headcanon#crowley#team free will#team free will 2.0#supernatural fluff
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In Bad Weather
Pairings: Dean Winchester x Plus-Sized/Latina!Reader || Sam Winchester x Eileen Leahy (background)
Summary: You and Dean tackle the biggest possible monkey wrench in your relationship yet: could Chuck have been manipulating you two all along?
[Set in S15 - "Fix It" for season finale]
AN: I had to finish the finale (maybe?) of this story verse before the end of Hispanic Heritage Month. 😘 This is the third installment of "Midnight Espresso!"
Song Inspo: “We Made It” by H.E.R. (<- On repeat. Seriously if you haven't heard this one, you'll thank me later.)
Word Count: 7,600
Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! Smutty smut, angst, hurt/comfort, body insecurity, body appreciation, heartache, followed by the fluffiest fluff…
☕ Midnight Espresso Masterlist
Al Mal Tiempo
Dean can’t remember the last time he woke up quite like this.
“Shit,” he grunts, clenching fists into the sheets.
He hears a muffled giggle underneath them.
He’s lying on his back, one knee starting to bend as he jolts on reflex. But familiar hands are holding down his thighs, as even more familiar lips caress him through his sweatpants.
Dean raises up the blankets and sheets to see your slightly frizzy-haired head pop up. Your playfully mischievous eyes meet his.
“Hey,” you greet him.
He raises a brow at you, smiling incredulously. “Hey.”
You then give him an annoyed look. “Do you mind? I was working on something.”
You try and cover yourself back up with the blankets, but Dean tosses them down your body. He wants to see you in that tank top and those little shorts. He's already getting a nice view of cleavage, no bra, and you’re straddling his thighs. His knees slide up to press against your ample behind.
“I do mind, actually.” His voice is still coarse with sleep. He clears it a little, and he smirks. “I was getting some good Zs in. You know, before I was interrupted.”
Your hands glide smoothly up his thighs, your nails catching on the fabric. You tilt your head at him.
“You really want me to stop?” you ask. Dean can’t readily respond, because he felt the shape of your words against his dick.
He moans, his eyes closing, fingers gripping the mattress under him when your mouth and tongue continue to outline the shape of his cock through his pants.
“I think I could finish you just like this,” you tell him, and still, your lips never leave him. “Or…maybe I’m feeling generous.”
Your nails hook on the waistband of his old sweatpants. The elastic has practically no give as you pull down the hem and expose his risen length. Shooting him one more smile, you let your hands glide down between his hips before you finally take his waiting cock into your mouth.
You love the sound of Dean’s voice, especially when you have him like this. His hand buries in your hair, tangling in the curls.
“Fuck, baby…” he mutters.
That’s kinda the idea, you want to say, but your mouth is preoccupied. Your lips and tongue move over him slowly. And soon your hands join to wrap around the base of his cock, stroking whatever you can’t take fully in your mouth.
You know he’s enjoying himself when his hand tightens in your hair. His breathing becomes labored, but still too steady for your liking.
You decide to pick up the pace. In your mind you think of a song to keep a good rhythm.
Devórame otra vez, ven, devórame otra vez…
Que la boca me sabe a tu cuerpo. Desesperan mis ganas por ti…
“Wait, wait,” Dean says, guttural in his throat. He stops you for a moment with his hands on your shoulders. You look up at him in confusion, but you oblige him.
“What’s wrong?” you ask in concern.
“Nothin’.” He shoots you a weary, lopsided smile. “Just thinking I want to have enough mojo to give you a good morning too.”
You snort. Mojo. This man.
But you shake your head. “You’re the winner today, baby. I just wanna make you feel good.”
It’s been a long year. You all had dealt with Michael taking Dean from you, at least for a while. Now Michael is gone, thanks to Jack, and they’d managed to reunite Jack back with his soul…but there’s still Chuck to deal with. It hangs over you all like a malevolent cloud.
So you want to help Dean take his mind off all that, just for a little while. And maybe part of you thinks that if you love him that much more, he won’t despair as much over how Chuck has been manipulating the brothers Winchester…basically their entire lives.
You shouldn’t have been surprised, however, when Dean grasps your arms and tugs you up until you’re level with his chest. His hand finds your cheek, brushing his thumb there, then slides into your hair.
He smirks. “We can both be winners.”
A smile spreads across your lips, just before he pulls you into a kiss. Passion grows one into many, with hands disappearing under each other’s clothes to remove them.
Strong hands part your thick thighs further, and long fingers find their way down between them. First teasingly along the seam of your pussy, then slipping inside to get you ready for him.
Your face buries in his neck as you moan encouragements into his ear, not all of them in English. By now, he’s learned a lot of what you whisper in Spanish. It still makes electricity spark down his spine, no matter what language you’re speaking in.
He knows when it’s time when the warm inner walls of your core are slick and gripping his fingers tight. But when he removes them, you shudder.
Both of you are breathing hard by the time he actually lines himself up inside of you. You use his shoulders for leverage, and the pads of his fingers circle insistently around your clit as you slowly sink down on his cock.
A keening cry escapes from your throat, while his free hand grips hard on your ass.
“Ah, fuck,” he grunts. Your walls are already fluttering around him, squeezing him like a vice.
You pant for breath. Your loose hair falls around both of you, shielding you from all other thoughts and sensations other than this.
“You feel so good,” you breathe, shifting your hips experimentally. “Always so good.”
Dean nods, and you know what it means: For me too.
He sits up and crushes you against him, bare breasts against his chest. (He loves the feeling.) He wraps an arm around your back and twists, until you’re underneath him and laying against his pillows. He encourages your thighs to stay wrapped around his waist as he begins to pound into you.
You breathe a short laugh. “Can’t let me stay on top?”
Dean grins. He grabs your hand and manages to press a kiss to your palm in between strokes. He knew what you were trying to do earlier, by taking care of him, but he can’t help it. He’s a giver.
And he knows exactly how to give it to you, shifting the angle of his hips to have you arching underneath him, gasping, clinging to his arms.
Thanks to your earlier treatment, that about does it for him. He can’t stop himself from a shuddering release inside you (praise fucking be for birth control, he thinks), but he still makes sure you come with him. He strokes your clit at the same time as his last deep strokes, and soon your voice washes over him as you call his name.
Afterwards, Dean rests his forehead against your shoulder, laying a kiss above your breast. He just woke up a few minutes ago, and he’s already tired.
“Okay. I need a damn nap,” he pants.
A giggle pours out of you. You rub his back soothingly.
“That’s what you get for doing all the work,” you tease. “I tried to help you.”
“Help with what?”
Both you and Dean freeze at the sound of Jack’s voice. He’s just opened the door to your bedroom like you two hadn’t expressly reminded him about privacy.
You yelp in shock, and Dean’s face screws up in a glare as he reaches back fast for the closest blanket to yank over you both.
“What the hell!”
“Oh…sorry,” Jack says, shielding his own eyes. “Sam just wanted me to tell you that breakfast is ready.”
“You didn’t need to tell them right this second!” Sam calls from down the hall.
“Knock, man! We knock on closed doors in this house!” Dean says. House. Bunker. Whatever.
He adds, “Or better yet, when my door’s closed, you give it a five-foot perimeter. Understand?”
Jack nods quickly and flees the room. “Sorry!”
The door slams shut behind him. Dean shakes his head. You can almost see the fumes coming out of his ears. You’re embarrassed and blushing, but you’re also biting your lower lip to stop yourself from laughing.
Dean looks down at you.
“It’s not funny. He needs to fuckin’ learn,” he says. His brows are still furrowed, but his mouth twitches upwards. “Should’ve locked that damn door.”
You reach up and twine your arms around his neck. Your lips get tantalizingly close to his.
“You’re still balls-deep inside me,” you remind him, pressing a sweet kiss to his lips. “It’s kinda funny.”
Dean’s lips purse. He doesn’t want to smile, but you’re making it difficult. Your hands slide down his chest, toying with his nipples as they go. You press a kiss to his throat. Meanwhile, your thighs squeeze his hips, reminding him of where he's still deeply buried. You smile when he utters a faltering sound.
"You tryin' to start something else I'll have to finish?" he teases. You give him a playfully narrowed look.
"Sure you got the mojo?" you toss back.
Raising a brow, Dean shifts out of you a few inches, just to push his half-hard cock back inside. You moan a bit, brows furrowed when the move stirs a tremor of arousal in your core. He hardens up fully at the sound, at the feeling of you clenching around him.
He smiles. “Well, well. I’m thinkin’ Round 2 after all.”
You smirk up at him and give his ass a nice little smack. “Then it's my turn for a ride.”
With a huff, he lets the twist of your hips and soft hands push him onto his back.
In the aftermath of Round 2, both of you are spent before you’ve even gotten out of bed. It’s a rare lazy morning where you don’t want to be bothered with another hunt, or even getting dressed just yet.
You have the cover of the warm sheets and blankets. Your back rests against Dean’s side, up against the headboard. His arm is wrapped around you, his hand intertwined with yours as you play with his fingers.
He’s catching up on Dr. Sexy MD, but you’re admittedly lost in thought. You bring his hand to your lips, and you just hold it there.
Dean glances at you and finally notices your contemplation. He strokes a thumb over your ring and pointer fingers.
“You okay?” he asks.
When you register his voice, you merely nod. But Dean isn’t convinced.
“Baby,” he presses.
It finally earns your attention. You look over at him, and you realize that he knows you too well to be fooled. You sigh, in a way that has Dean pausing his show and giving you his full attention.
“What’re you thinking about?” he asks.
With your free hand, you rub at your eyes and cheek. “Sam and Eileen. My heart just fucking breaks for them.”
You’re thinking about what happened a couple of weeks ago. After learning that Chuck manipulated Sam, who found the spell to bring Eileen back to life, she just…left.
Part of you wants to be angry with her; you love Sam like he’s your own brother. But you understand her as well. Being tied to Sam and Dean Winchester is like being tied to twin hurricanes. You’ve just been in this for far too long to let go of them now.
Dean nods at your admission, but he doesn’t have an answer for you. He hurts for his brother too. Part of him even feels a little guilty, having what he has with you, when Sam’s bit of happiness just keeps slipping out of his fingers.
“Maybe they just need some time to sort themselves out. Cooler heads and all that,” he says.
Time. You hope that’s all they need. However, it also makes you wonder about other things.
“That’s not it, is it?” Dean asks. He’s watching you shrewdly, and your lips thin into a line.
“Dean, what if…”
“Yeah?”
You hate yourself for even thinking it, let alone saying it. But you and Dean had survived this long on honesty, above all else. You can’t hide this from him anymore.
“What if Chuck manipulated us too?” you ask, in a small voice.
Dean’s face slackens. His hand releases yours, and he turns to face you more fully.
Emotion begins to clog in your throat and burn in your eyes.
“What if you and I would’ve never met if…” Your voice trembles, unshed tears clouding your vision. “And even if we did, would you still have kissed me that night? When we got back from that hunt—”
“Hey,” Dean protests, but now that you’ve begun, you can’t stop yourself from spilling your latest insecurities—the ones you’ve been holding onto ever since Chuck revealed himself as the villain of the whole world.
“I mean, what am I?” you ask. “Just the diversity casting in Chuck’s story?”
“Don’t you say that shit to me,” Dean angrily snaps.
You gape incredulously. “Excuse me?”
“You fucking heard me.”
You feel how tense his body is, but your temper snaps just as well.
“Oye, mira ver,” you warn him.
You’ve levied that at him enough times that he knows all too well what it means.
“Watch it, my ass,” he retorts. “You should know better than that.”
You frown at him, but he reads the thread of insecurity in the downturn of your lips, in your eyes that are starting to shine with tears. That always breaks him down.
Dean sighs and reaches for you then, cupping your cheek and brushing a thumb tenderly at the corner of your eye. He’s even angrier at Chuck for making you doubt yourself…and doubt him.
“Come ‘ere,” Dean says.
You hesitate, but you go willingly back into his arms. You turn over and let him gather you against his chest. You rest against him. Your head tucks under his chin, and your leg slips between both of his.
“I love you,” he says, and his voice rumbles above your head. “That’s it. That’s all that matters.”
You bite your lip. “But—”
“No buts,” he says. Though his lips slowly tug at a smile. “Well, not that kind anyway.”
He gives your bare ass a playful squeeze under the sheets. You huff in amusement and swat him back.
“Ya, coño. Enough,” you say with a laugh. “I probably have bruises back there.”
He just grins. “So you get what I’m saying?”
You let out a sigh. You push back enough to see his face, and you give him a soft smile.
“Yeah.”
Dean nods, but he still sees the worry in your eyes. He tries to stamp down the rest of your insecurities with a kiss, slow and deep.
You break away from him after a while to ask, “Ready for coffee?”
Dean sighs through his nose, but he hums in agreement.
“Will you make it how I like?” he asks.
A smile breaks across your face.
“Café con leche?” you offer.
He nods. “Yeah, please.”
“So polite,” you remark with a raised brow. “What a change of pace.”
His mouth edges into a smirk. When you turn to get out of bed, he makes sure to give your ass one last smack. You jump a little with a yelp, but he catches your smile in the mirror above the dresser.
Dean watches you shake out your curls and get ready for the day. You spend a lot of time blow-drying and straightening your hair, but he likes it like this too. Natural and wild.
He likes that you wear the “dream catcher” (formerly known as your hole-ridden Journey shirt) a lot less. He likes that you’ve stopped feeling the need to wear anything to bed at all, if you don't feel like it; that you’re more comfortable with yourself. Comfortable with him.
But your smile drops. Dean sees the gears of your mind continuing to churn as you get dressed.
He has a feeling, despite his best efforts, that you’re still not convinced about the Chuck thing. And while Dean won’t admit it, that cuts him deep.
Six years ago…
Las Cruces, New Mexico
The first time Dean met you was, of course, in a bar.
It didn’t take all that long for him to notice you, if he remembers right.
You’d agreed to play pool with some guy who also speaks Spanish with you, and you seem genuinely into the game. So much so, that you don’t seem to notice how the guy is eyeing you.
Dean doesn’t like the way the man’s gaze drags over your every abundant curve. Yeah, he’s been doing the same thing, but he likes to think he’s a little more classy about it.
He’s sitting at the bar with a half-drunk beer in his hand, watching the game out of the corner of his eye. He’s so invested that his beer is already flat and unpleasant, but when has that stopped him before?
…But then, Dean notices what you’re doing. You’re playing possum, making bad shots on purpose. His mouth curves behind his beer.
Little minx.
Until you sweep the guy for all his money, that is.
Dean watches the show in amusement. Secretly, he notes appreciation for the tight jeans, V-necked top and ankle boots. The red lipstick is the same shade as your manicured nails, and it all works well for you. The fullness of that pretty mouth would certainly work well for him.
He catches the way you sweep your hair out of the way, and the deceptive concentration in your eyes when you line up a shot on the second round. Your first turn.
You then sink each of your cue balls expertly, without missing one.
The swindled man gets mad, shouting at you in Spanish. You reply to him calmly as you lean on your cue stick. He gets even louder and reaches for the money, but before Dean would’ve intervened, you stab at the man’s foot with the cue.
Your quick and clever hand gathers the money that you won, but because you seem to be kind at your core, you leave him thirty bucks for “gasolina” while he holds his foot.
You surprise Dean further by joining him at the bar.
“Good game,” he says, giving you props with a smile.
You give him a smile back. “Thank you. Want to join me for another one?”
Your English is smooth, and so is your voice. Dean raises a brow at you.
“Even though I saw your little takedown there?” he asks. “Think I just saw all your moves.”
You laugh a little. “Not all of them.”
Was that a bit of flirtation in your eyes? Dean’s smile deepens into a smirk.
“But don’t worry,” you say. “I know how to play fair.”
He hits you with a bit of charm, lowering his voice with (he thinks) just the right amount of flirtation back.
“Now where’s the fun in that?”
Your smile deepens too, despite your blush.
Cute, he thinks, before he follows you back to the scene of the crime. AKA: the nearest pool table.
Dean wracks up the billiards and sets up a new game. You hand him his cue, and he gestures at you.
“Winner goes first,” he says graciously.
“Hmm, thought you were gonna say ladies first,” you reply.
“That too,” Dean says. “I’m a gentleman, after all.”
You snort in response. “I’m sure you are…”
“Dean,” he supplies. He earns your name by the time he sinks four balls in a row.
You sigh as you level him with a look. You seem to realize that the two of you are more than evenly matched.
“Don’t worry,” he says, shooting you a grin. “I won’t take all your money.”
And yet, when it gets down to it, he misses his last shot by a hair.
You watch him suspiciously when you two make it back to the bar.
“You wouldn’t have thrown that last shot on purpose, would you?” you ask.
Dean ducks his head and smiles, somewhat liking the fact that you caught him red-handed. You’re smart.
“Now, what kind of gentleman would I be to take your ‘hard-earned’ cash?” he asks. It earns a burst of laughter from you, with the shine of your teeth.
“You could buy me a beer though,” he shrugs.
“Wow. Okay, Señor Smooth,” you tease. Though you get the bartender’s attention and get him a fifth of whiskey instead, of the good stuff too.
Dean considers asking you out right there. Sam is waiting back at the motel, but Dean is willing to book another room just to get you to himself for the night. And if possible, for however long he’s in town.
“You know,” you say after a while, halfway through your Long Island iced tea. “The thing you’re hunting? It’s not a garden variety spirit…it’s El Duende. Creepy hobgoblin, basically. I’ve been tracking it from three cities over.”
Dean is figuratively (and almost literally) set back on his heels. He tilts his head at you, furrowing his brows.
“You’re a hunter?” he asks.
You laugh at the look on his face. “I saw you and another mountain man at the police station earlier…though nice look on the FBI get up. Think your ID guy could hook me up with a new CIA badge?”
Dean smiles. This is gonna be fun.
Now:
People were starting to disappear.
Billie, the new Death, was doing this. Dean was convinced. And Sam thought everyone from the Apocalypse world (and others who shouldn’t exist in this world) would be on her list. Ultimately, you all couldn’t save anyone. Not even Eileen.
You and Dean both comforted Sam on that terrible night. Though he was still distraught as he decided to organize the other refugees with Jack and Donna.
You stuck with Dean in his plan to raid Death’s library for Chuck’s book; the only thing in the world that told the story of how he would meet his end.
You chose to back up Dean in his plan, but really, neither you or Castiel thought it was a good idea to poke the bear known as Billie. Not for a book that none of you could read, except for Death herself.
But now here you are, in Death’s library, watching with worry as Dean holds Death’s own scythe against her.
“I didn’t hurt your friends,” Billie grits out.
“What?” Dean asks.
She laughs humorlessly. “You’re in the wrong place, Dean.”
“What’re you talking about?”
“People are gettin’ gone. I’m guessing it’s Chuck,” she says. “And that means, you’re just wasting time.”
Her hands are braced against the weapon poised at her throat. She already has a stab wound in her shoulder. She tells him that the earlier wound he gave her has festered. It’ll never heal. Eventually, it’ll kill her.
But she intends to take you, Dean, and Castiel with her.
Billie becomes the hunter, following the three of you back through the portal into the bunker. Dean’s hand is so tight around your arm, making sure you’re keeping up with him and never falter. Castiel does his best get you and Dean to safety. And after he wards it against her with his own blood, only the old dungeon is safe for you all.
For now.
Billie pounds on the door, over and over. She’ll break through the warding eventually.
You grab onto Dean’s sleeve, just to hold onto him. He brings you close to him in a protective embrace. You see the panic in his eyes as his mind scrambles to find a way out of here, knowing deep down that there’s nothing any of you can do. Castiel is nearly powerless. You’re all trapped.
“That wound is killing her,” Cas says. “We might be able to wait her out.”
His gaze is on the floor, though he briefly looks up at Dean. He shakes his head.
“And if we can’t?”
“Then we fight.”
Dean shakes his head. He pulls away from you to lean against the wall.
“We’ll lose,” he says. Your heart breaks at the way he looks, shame-ridden and defeated. “I just led us into another trap…all because I couldn’t end Chuck. Because I was angry, and because I needed something to kill, and because that’s all I know how to do.”
His eyes are red and burning. Yours swim with tears of dismay. You want to correct him as he continues to vent, speaking with a certainty that it was Chuck all along.
Dean looks at you then, and at Cas. He’s close to tears when he says they should’ve stayed with Sam and Jack. That everyone was about to die. And he can’t stop it. And he can’t stop Billie when she breaks through that door.
You don’t know what to tell him to ease his guilt. All you know is that despite everything, you made your choice to support him in this. To stay with him.
You made your choice a long time ago, you realize.
“Wait,” Cas says. His blue eyes burn with realization. “There’s one thing she’s afraid of. One thing…strong enough to stop her.”
Dean’s eyes widen. Cas uses what strength he has left to push you and Dean away, and he summons the Empty.
Dean pulls you further along with him as the formless void coils up like ink through the walls and cement floors. It drags Billie into its darkness, but it claims Castiel with it, as it once promised it would.
After the angel gives up his life, you and Dean are holding each other against the wall, on the ground, shaking and each rocked to the core.
You’re able to break out of your shock sooner than Dean, who just saw his best friend die.
You kneel beside him while he sits, and you hold him to you while you cry. He can’t speak, but you know his guilt is eating at him.
His phone rings, startling you both, and it’s Sam. Dean can’t answer it. He covers his face, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes, as if that could stop the ache in his chest. You press a kiss to his hair, his temple.
“He saved us, Dean. It’s not your fault,” you tell him. He shakes his head. You know he doesn’t believe you, but when he grasps your arm, his hold is desperate.
“It’s me,” he says. His voice is shaking and ragged. “Everything I do turns to shit. Everyone around me pays the price. That’s just how it is…if you were smart, you’d hightail it as far as fucking possible from me.”
Your breath gets trapped in your lungs. Your heart feels like it’s shattering.
“Dean…baby, look at me,” you say with a sniffle. You gently hold his face, and he lets you raise him up. Your eyes are bright with new conviction.
“No one," you tell him, "not even Chuck can force me to love you the way I do. And not a damn thing can stop me from staying with you.”
Dean has tears burgeoning in his eyes. You caress his cheek, rough with stubble he’s let go too long.
“There’s a saying. Al mal tiempo, buena cara,” you tell him. His face shows a glimmer of confusion. “At bad weather, put on a happy face. It means even in difficult times, there’s still a reason to keep going. Right now, you are my reason.”
Dean considers that. He squeezes your arms unconsciously, as if grounding himself in you.
At the very least, he’s grateful that he’s not alone. And after a moment, he nods. You press a kiss to his cheek, and then his forehead. His eyes close at your comfort, your affection. He doesn’t think he deserves it, but he accepts it anyway.
“Come on, let’s get you off the floor,” you say. You start to help him up…but your body stills. You feel a strange prickling across your skin.
Dean notices the shift, with growing unease in his gut. He grips you tighter and calls your name in concern.
Your gasp is the last bit of your voice that Dean hears before he watches you turn to dust in his arms.
Buena Cara
Four years ago…
It’s the morning after you and Dean shared a midnight espresso. The morning after your first kiss, your first confession, and your first time.
He wakes tangled up in you, and the sheets, which are somehow tied up in knots around his legs and yours.
“What’d you do here, woman?” he asks.
His voice is still gruff with sleep, and he lays on his stomach. You giggle almost silently next to him. You’re lying on your back with the sheets somehow covering up to your chest. One of your legs is tangled with his.
“Nothing,” you claim. He snorts and moves closer. His lips find your shoulder, lazily burning a path downwards. But when he grips the sheet and tries to expose more of you, you grasp his wrist on reflex.
Brows furrowing, Dean glances up at your face. You’re biting your lip, and he sees signs of insecurity in your eyes.
“You haven’t seen me in the daytime yet,” you joke. Yet another one that isn’t really a joke, Dean realizes.
He really wishes he could find your goddamn ex and bash his skull in. Because Dean would like nothing more than to just spend the rest of the day in this bed, mapping out the smooth expanse of your tan skin.
So he slips his arm underneath you. You utter a little squeal in protest, but he manhandles you until you’re resting on his chest, bare skin against bare skin. You look down at him with fondness, touching his cheek. Dean stares up at you with a reserved frown.
“What’s it gonna take, huh?” he asks. It’s like you don’t believe he wants you, even now.
You bite your lip as your fears creep in behind your eyes, like black ink coiling in your mind. That he just likes your personality. That maybe he just wanted to try something “different” with you, a thicc-thighed, fat-assed Latina, instead of the petite, slender girls you’ve seen him go after in bars.
“You could have anyone, Dean,” you point out.
Dean’s frown deepens, his brows furrowing. His hands lower on your back, squeezing the curve of your waist and soft hips.
“Anyone’s not naked in my bed,” he says. His voice is stern and matter-of-fact.
You attempt a smile, but he’s not convinced. He blows out a breath and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Your ex sure did a number on you, didn’t he?” he remarks.
Your eyes widen. The more you think about it, maybe he did.
But maybe it wasn’t just him…
You tear up and blink against them, trying not to let them fall. You had thought you were happy with your curves. You really did.
You didn’t realize you had internalized so many of these negative thoughts about yourself, but here Dean was, forcing you to confront them. You’re grateful, but you also don’t know what to say.
Dean’s brows draw together. He holds your cheek.
“Okay. It’s all right. We’ll work on it.” He kisses your forehead. He also wipes a tear from your cheek. “Don’t cry, baby.”
A laugh gets choked in your throat. “You should know this about me by now. I’m a crier.”
“Yeah, you’re also rockin’ a bit of sex hair,” he says, tangling his fingers further in the wily strands. “My kinda woman.”
You sigh through your nose. This man.
You can’t help but smile softly. The tip of your finger traces his jawline, down to his chin.
“Want me to make some coffee?” you offer. “I can have you try a cortadito with breakfast.”
“What’s that?” Dean asks.
“Two shots of espresso, warm frothy milk on top,” you reply.
“God, two shots? It’s a wonder you ever sleep,” he quips. “But I do like the sound of frothy. I’ll whip us up some eggs.”
“And bacon?” you ask.
“Of freakin’ course, bacon.”
With that agreement, you two slowly get out of bed, shower, and go to the kitchen, where Sam looks bleary-eyed and annoyed at the kitchen table with his coffee mug. But he doesn’t have it in his heart to truly be mad at you and Dean.
“I’m happy for you guys,” Sam says wryly. “Just, next time, put a sock on the door or something. So I know when to break out the ear plugs.”
Now:
Sam finds Dean sprawled on the dining room floor the next morning after Castiel has died, and you have disappeared, along with everyone else on Earth.
Dean is surrounded by empty beer and liquor bottles. Sam’s heart clenches as he starts to help his brother.
“All right, let’s get you off the floor,” he says.
In his words, Dean only hears your voice. He shoves Sam off him and stumbles into the kitchen.
There Jack is starting to wash dishes. He takes your little cafetera coffee maker from the stove, preparing to dump the old grounds. Dean grabs it out of his hand.
“Leave it alone,” Dean snaps. He slams it back on the stove where you left it.
Jack is wide-eyed, but Sam gives his brother a patient warning with his eyes. Dean ignores it and heads for his room.
“Sorry,” Sam says on behalf of his brother.
Jack shakes his head with tears in his eyes. “It’s okay, I…I understand.”
He already misses you too. You’d become a kind of older sister to him…and Castiel. Well. Cas was the father Jack will never have again.
Sam agrees with a nod, clapping Jack comfortingly on the back.
Sam ventures down the long halls of the bunker to Dean’s room. He pushes the cracked open door, and sees his brother sat hunched on the edge of his bed, hands bracing on his knees.
Sam walks in, swings Dean’s desk chair around, and sits down across from his brother. He rests his forearms on his knees and waits.
When Dean eventually looks up with red-rimmed eyes, Sam’s heart breaks a little more. For Dean, and for himself.
“We’re going to end this,” Sam promises him.
“We tried to give Chuck what he fucking wanted,” Dean reminds. “We offered to end ourselves, man. He wouldn’t bite. He won’t bring ‘em back.”
Dean’s voice cracks at the end there. Sam takes a deep breath, and lets it out just as slowly.
“We’ll figure out a way,” he says. “We always do.”
“That’s just it,” Dean says, with tired, glassy eyes. “I don’t think we can do it this time.”
Sam’s throat tightens. “Then I’ll believe for both of us.”
By the time Chuck is done snapping his fingers, Sam, Dean, and Jack are the only people left on Earth.
Until they encounter the Michael of this world, formerly trapped in the cage. They hatch a plan. And even though the angels don’t cooperate, they manage to play straight into the real plan.
Jack is the ace up Team Free Will’s sleeve, and as it turns out, that bomb inside the kid (made of the first Adam’s rib) was good for something. The nephilim absorbs the power of Lucifer, Michael, and ultimately Chuck himself.
Jack is the one who saves the world.
Before Dean leaves with his brother and Jack, away from that grassy cliffside in Lebanon, he turns to Chuck.
“Answer me this. Did you…” Dean says, struggling with how to formulate his question. “Meeting my girl. Was that us? Or was it just another manipulation?”
Sam watches his brother with concern. He sees the way Dean’s hand is already itching for his gun. Chuck is human now, and Sam knows how tempting it would be to truly end it.
Chuck himself is still prone on the ground, sitting up with wariness behind his eyes.
“I didn’t tug on that thread, actually,” he admits. “Made sense to let you have a glimmer of happiness, something to hold onto. To fight for.”
Then he looks up at Dean with a tremulous smirk pulling at his lips.
“But I did wait for the perfect moment to dust her, didn’t I?”
Within seconds, Dean’s gun is slipping into his hands with the safety cocked back, the barrel lined up for a straight shot between Chuck’s eyes. Sam barks a warning, but Dean doesn’t altogether care. He’s furious, sneering at the former god who cowers like the coward he is.
“Dean?” Sam calls to him. It’s a question and a warning all at once.
Dean’s mouth works, quirking at a humorless smile. He cocks the safety back in place and lowers his gun with a shaking hand.
He stalks back to the Impala and doesn’t look at his brother.
The only three people left alive in the world ride back into the empty streets of Lebanon, Kansas.
When Jack snaps his fingers, it’s like this little planet is reborn.
Suddenly, it’s filled with life. People walking their dogs, their kids, hailing cabs, nearly rear-ending each other’s cars in traffic while texting. It’s like the chaos never happened, and equilibrium is restored.
Even the shaggy dog Dean found last week bounds up to him. He bends down to pet the dog’s furry head, scratching behind his ears. Dean’s going to actually have to come up with a name for this thing now.
And yet…
In a world full of color, Dean still just sees gray.
He and Sam say a bittersweet goodbye to Jack, who ascends into Heaven. Dean can only hope the kid has a good WiFi signal if they ever need him again, like if he can’t find…
The forgotten cell phone in his pocket buzzes on a ring. He shares a wide-eyed look with Sam, licking his dry lips before he reaches into his jean pocket. He flips the phone over and finds your name across his caller ID.
With a shaking hand, he swipes his thumb across the green button and raises the phone up to his ear. He can’t even make his voice work right away.
Thankfully, he doesn’t have to.
“Dean?” your beautiful voice greets him.
His lips pull at a tremulous smile. “Hey, sweetheart.”
You let out a relieved breath.
“Oh, thank God. I’m here at the bunker. Where are you?”
Dean wants to quip that Chuck had nothing to do with it, but he humors you.
“Not too far,” he says. He gestures to a smiling Sam, and together they haul ass back to the Impala.
“Promise?” you ask. Dean grins.
“I’ll be home before you know it.”
Once again, you’re tangled up in the bed you share with Dean. Almost every morning without fail, he teasingly grumbles as he tries to free his legs from the knotted sheets.
“What the hell did you do here, woman?”
“I didn’t do anything,” you refute. Though your giggle betrays your guilt while he continues to struggle. “You’ll just have to stay in bed then.”
You drag him back to you, and it’s not unpleasant to be welcomed back to the soft warmth of your body.
“We’ve got some monsters waiting,” he reminds you.
“They can wait,” you say, and ply him with a lazy morning kiss. It heats up in passion as your hands slide under his shirt…
But of course, one of said “monsters” predictably starts banging at the bedroom door. It opens a crack, revealing a head of light brown hair and tearful hazel eyes.
“Mo-oooom! Cari keeps hitting me after you told her not to,” cries your son.
His older sister stomps behind him, so he ducks into the room to flee from her, heading for the bed and jumping into your arms.
Dean sighs, hiding his disappointment. You give him a secret smile while brushing back your son’s hair, pressing a kiss to his forehead. To Dean, you gesture with your eyes at the doorway, where your nine-year-old daughter peeks in. She eyes her little brother in annoyance.
Tattletale, her face says.
“Caridad,” you call to her in your sterner mom voice. “Come here, please.”
Cari is most definitely a daddy’s girl, and she beelines for her father. He picks up the nine year old and settles her on the bed, tucked into his side.
“Robbie’s a crybaby,” she says.
“No, you are!” Robbie cries indignantly. He tries to push her, but you grab his hand and push it down to the bed. Dean has to do the same with Cari when she tries to pinch her brother.
“All right, all right, enough,” Dean says, with all the authority his own father once had. “Can’t we all just have one morning in peace?”
That’s when Dean’s phone rings on his nightstand. He sighs and answers it, and it’s Sam, asking what time you and Dean plan to come over his house today for the Fourth of July barbecue.
“Give me a couple hours to wrangle the kids,” Dean replies. He has to curl an arm around Cari so she won’t throw another pillow at her brother.
“Tell Eileen I’m bringing the dessert,” you chime in, calling to Sam in the phone.
“You got that?” Dean asks his brother. A moment later, he reports back to you with a nod.
“He’s wanting the fluffy cake thing,” Dean says. “The sweet one with the lil’ cherries on top.”
“Tres leches?” you supply with a smile.
He nods again. “Yeah, that one.”
“Not a problem, but let’s get them cleaned up so I can start baking,” you say. Though you grunt as a small bare foot kicks at your side.
“Hey!” you reach for your daughter’s arm. “Ya, that’s enough. Te calmas, o te calmo. Los dos, coño.”
Dean snorts, watching his children now wrestling each other in the middle of the bed despite your best efforts to keep them apart.
“Easier said than done,” he mutters. He hangs up with Sam and then surveys the familiar chaos in front of him.
“All right, you guys want to see your cousins?” Dean bribes. The kids actually pause and perk up at that.
“We’re going to Uncle Sammy’s house?” Cari asks.
“Yep, so quit screwin’ around. Let’s up and at ‘em,” Dean says. “Brush your teeth and wash your face, then meet me downstairs for breakfast.”
“Can we have Cap’n Crunch?” Robbie asks.
“No, Raisin Bran,” Cari insists. You have to laugh a little, reaching out to stroke her cheek. Your daughter surely is a special sort of child for genuinely liking Raisin Bran.
“Fine,” Dean agrees to both with a nod. “Get to it. Come on, let’s go!”
He claps his hands until the kids are up and out of his bed, running to the door.
“Don’t run!” you warn them. “Caridad Marie Winchester, stop pushing your brother, or you’re not going anywhere.”
The door hangs open as the sounds of small feet patter down the hall, accompanied by childish giggling and yelling. You sigh and lean back into the pillows, closing your eyes.
“I’m already tired. Why did we have two of those?”
Dean smirks and leans over to press a kiss to your forehead. You keep him close with a hand in his shirt.
“If I remember right, having the first one was so much fun, you just couldn’t keep your hands off me,” he teases.
“Is that what happened? I seem to remember some tequila and cajoling involved,” you smirk, cracking your eyes open. You pull him to you and kiss him thoroughly.
Both of you try not to lose track of time, but in the ten years since retiring from hunting, learning how to be civilians, true partners, and parents, you’ve become pros at stealing the small moments for yourselves.
“Come on, babe. Don’t you want Cari to have a little bro?” you mock in his deeper voice. “They’ll protect each other, be each other’s best friends.”
Dean chuckles at your interpretation of him, giving a teasing yank to one of your stray curls.
“They will, one day. Sam and I didn’t really get each other until later on.”
You smile at that and raise your hand to the beard he’s trying to grow out. You remember him teasing Sam for sporting a “ferret” on his face, once upon a time. But it seems that both Winchester brothers are well-suited to the lumberjack look.
“Maybe we can get Sam and Eileen to keep the kids tonight,” Dean suggests.
You like the sound of that. Cari and Robbie take any chance for a sleepover with their cousins.
You run a hand down his chest. “You’re saying I’m going to get all this to myself tonight?”
He grabs your hand and kisses it. His gaze holds a familiar heat that makes you smile. Your fingers wiggle teasingly in his grip, which curves his lips as well. Your wedding rings gleam in the lamplight.
We don’t have time now, but we will later, his gaze promises.
So with a sigh, he releases your hand.
“All right, lazy. Time to get a move on,” he teases. He then points at you. “Good face.”
Buena cara. Your smile deepens as you start to rise out of bed. It’s become his thing with you, starting the day with a good face.
Nowadays, you don’t often have a reason not to.
“I’ll make coffee,” you offer, as you do most mornings. The one time Dean tried to make it your way, he burned the bottom of your coffee press.
He tosses you a smirk as he pulls on a new shirt. He then digs in his side of the dresser for a pair of jeans that don’t have jelly stains, imprinted on with small fingers.
“Yeah, that’s probably for the best,” he agrees. “I think today’s a two-shot kinda morning. What do you think?”
You sidle up behind him at the dresser and swat him on the ass. He jolts a little, making a rumbling sound as he eyes you in your little black nightgown. It’s a warning, not to start something you two won’t have time to finish.
“Sounds about right.” Bracing your hands on his hips, you lean up on your toes so you can rest your chin on his shoulder, meeting his eyes in the mirror. You smile.
“Two cortaditos coming up.”
AN: Aaaand I am soft. 🥹 I've been wanting to get to this for a while now. If you like it, let me know! ❤️
Some more Spanish translations for ya:
This is a callback from "Devour Me" with “Ven Devórame Otra Ves” by Lalo Rodriguez.
Devórame otra vez, ven, devórame otra vez… Que la boca me sabe a tu cuerpo. Desesperan mis ganas por ti…
Translation:
"Devour me again. Come, devour me again…
Because my mouth has the taste of your body. My lust for you is exasperating."
“Te calmas, o te calmo. Los dos, coño.”
Translation:
“Calm down, or I’ll calm you down. Both of you, damn it.” [😂 I think every Latina mom has spouted this at least once lol.]
Keep Reading:
Next up in this series is “Dream With Me.” It's set in the time gap in this story. Specifically, in 15x20:
Summary: When your ex-boyfriend calls for help on a case, you have a tough decision to make. But Dean isn’t going to let you do anything alone. (AKA: The last hunt you, Sam, and Dean will ever go on together.)
▶️ Next Story: Dream With Me (PART 1)
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thinking about how sweet the spn boys would be with an autistic girlfriend. don’t mind me just sobbing my eyes out at the ideas I’m having.
#anglbby444#sam winchester x plus size reader#dean winchester#Castiel#dean winchester x reader#castiel x reader#supernatural fanfiction#supernatural#jared padalecki#jensen ackles#misha collins
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The Damned
Synopsis: Zarathos, a child, a daughter of God - but angel, first. The Angel of Justice and Vengence, a powerful entity and her father's strongest soldier. A clean up mission gone wrong, the angel is cut down and captured by the demons of Hell. Forced to work as a bounty hunter, she becomes a frightened member of the damned, now known as The Ryder. Unfortunately, her next hunt accompanies unwanted company.
Episodes:
Chapter 01 - The Seven Dwarfs
Chapter 02 - Skeletal Crusader
#dean Winchester x reader#dean Winchester x black!reader#dean Winchester fanfic#dean Winchester imagine#dean winchester#supernatural fanfiction#supernatural series rewrite#supernatural#Castiel#sam winchester#jensen ackles x plus size reader#dean winchester angst#jensen ackles x reader#black characters#black writer
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This is what I look like posting
#castiel x y/n#dean winchester#dean winchester x reader#sam winchester#supernatural#castiel x dean#dean x y/n#deancas#castiel x reader#castiel novak#dean x castiel#castiel supernatural#castiel#castiel novak x reader#sam and dean#dean winchester supernatural#dean winchester x plus size!reader#dean x reader#sam winchester spn#sam winchester supernatural#sam winchester x reader fluff#sam winchester x reader#jensen ackles#misha collins#jared padalecki#spnfandom#spn fanart#spn#spn rp#spnedit
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Y/n: Love is weakness and an evolutionary mistake.
Sam: You are literally making a Valentine’s day card for Castiel .
Y/n, pointing their hot glue gun towards Sam: You’re on thin fucking ice.
#incorrect quotes supernatural#plus size reader#sam winchester#supernatural x reader#supernatural incorrect quotes#sam winchester x reader#castiel novak#castiel x plus size reader#castiel x reader
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Just a Mirror
Sam Winchester x plus size!Reader
Words: about 6.3k words
Warning: saddy sadness, and some allusion to sexy time, eating disorder, hating on your own person, please be careful if you sensible about this themes
REQUEST: Hi :) I saw that your requests are open, and I was wondering if you could do a Sam Winchester x plus sized reader; an angsty fluffy friends to lovers that has some smut and reader hating herself in the mirror and possibly problems with eating
Author’s note: Hi love! Thank you @desicroft02 so much for your request. I felt really inspired by your idea love and I hope you like how it came out, if you don't find yourself with what i wrote, feel free to say it to me and I'll write to you a new one !
p.s.I got very caught up in the topic, since it is something I feel very close to. I was never the skinny girl, but with the years I've grown used to feel different to others girls, and even if sometimes I really hate what I see in the mirror, I kinda arrived to the point that I see both the flaws and the strenghts of my body and I love both, but some of my closest friend and this kinda of disorder and I tried to help them the way aI could so this one is for them too.
In case you need someone to talk to, I am always here, don't be afraid to seek help because often having someone close by to remind you that the volume of that evil voice we hear inside can be lowered or eliminated is important.
Requests are open I Ask
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Why?
This is the only question that floats in your mind, while, with thick tears in your eyes, you try to read the enormous book about whatever monster you are hunting with your friends in this little city, forgotten by God.
You and your childhood best friends are hunting some monster that you still haven't been able to figure out what it is, despite the fact that you are reading yet another list of monstrous animals in the story, while Dean and Sam are still out at the bar where you had decided to spend the evening, and from which you had decided to escape as quickly as possible, without giving any kind of explanation to the two hunters, holding back tears and trying not to meet their confused gaze
You and the boys have been friends since you were six and they were seven and eleven. You met on a rainy October day when you were still living at Bobby's house, after your father had died in a hunting accident after leaving you with him, and being his friend and seeing him almost as a brother he couldn't help but welcome you and raise you as if you were his own daughter.
Dean and Sam had just been left in the rain on the narrow dirt road by their father when you looked out and saw these two cold, sad, and at the same time angry children. You could see the resentment they felt for the man who looked less and less like a father and more and more like an army general, ready to train soldiers and not raise children. Immediately you went to Bobby and told him of the presence of those two unknown children who were in your driveway. He had immediately run to get them and brought them inside the house, worried that they would get sick from standing in the rain, and wondering why their father had left them there, without saying anything.
"He said he didn't have time to explain and that he had to get there as fast as he could, but that he would call you this evening." Said the older of the two once they were seated on the couch in what must once have been a beautiful dining room, and was now more like an ever-growing mountain of books. It is to your adoptive father that you owe all the culture and ability to read texts on the supernatural that most hunters would not even know how to open.
As he spoke you could see the blond child trying to hold back the sadness within himself and show himself as a big boy, almost pretending to understand why his father abandoned them like that without saying a word; in contrast, the one who was supposed to be the smaller of the two, with unruly brown hair, looked more like a beaten puppy, as he wetly moved his feet lazily on the floor, listening to what his brother had to say, but not hiding his sadness and anger at his daddy's decision.
"Baby, couldn't you get Sammy a glass of water for him while Dean and I go make a call for a minute?" Bobby then asked you suddenly, and you realized that you were lost in thought as you watched and studied those boys. You nodded quickly, trying not to let it show that you had spent all that time staring at them, as you heard Bobby's voice and that of the blond boy, apparently named Dean, drift away, only to hear the front door open and close.
After a few minutes you returned to the living room with a glass in your hand, and walked over to the brown-eyed boy, who was now looking at you and smiling shyly. You handed him the glass with a beaming smile, and he could do nothing but blush a little and retract his body a little, letting shyness take possession of him as he took the glass.
"Thank you." He told you in a faint voice.
"You're welcome." You replied as you sat next to him on the sofa.
"My name is Sam." He said, only to freeze and blush again as he held out a hand for you to shake, just as grown-ups do. You told him your name, and he commented that it was a very nice name, and that he liked it a lot, before going back to being silent and staring into the sad void.
You not being able to see what you considered a new friend feel so bad, you shamelessly asked him why his father had left him there and if that was why he was sad. He turned to look at you, and unknown how, he burst into tears, while with his hands he covered his face, not wanting to be seen as weak with someone he had just met, but you didn't give a damn.
Immediately you hugged him and listened to him talk about how his father was behaving with them, how his brother was struggling more and more to hide that he was tired of his parent's behavior, and how he was lonely and sad, constantly changing towns and seeing nothing but his family. That poor seven-year-old seemed to be thirty years old because of the problems he was telling you about, and as much as you were even younger because you were only six, you felt like you could understand him, because for a while that had also been your life before your father passed away.
You remained thus cuddled on the couch and fell asleep, lulled by the warmth of the fire slightly away from you and the new friendly presence that had entered your lives that afternoon, so much so that when Bobby and Dean returned after trying for a varied amount of time to contact John, and finally once succeeding in being insulted and put down by him, they both smiled at the sight of those two small and defenseless children embracing each other, as if to protect each other from the world. But no one knew that night before you fell asleep you had promised to protect each other forever, no matter how, when or why you would always be there for each other.
That was how you got to know the Winchester brothers, and the hatred for their father also began.
You awaken from your thoughts when you hear the motel door open and close, realizing that another time had gone into the whirlwind of memories and you were lost in remembering again when life was easy. You hear someone coming toward you with heavy footsteps, so you wipe away the tears you didn't know were there on your cheeks, which like small streams had almost made a furrow along your skin by now.
You sense right away who it is, but you don't have the strength to turn around so you continue to cry silently as you feel two arms wrapped around you, and Dean's warm body resting on your back as he leans down so that he can put his head in the crook of your neck and hold you better. Ever since the two of you met it was immediately like big brother and little sister between the two of you, and even now despite the fact that it has been a long time since you were children and in your spare time you enjoyed stealing cherries from the neighbor's tree, there is still that complicity and understanding between the two of you that once existed.
He knows exactly why you escaped so suddenly from the dive bar you were both in a few hours ago. Sam had seen a beautiful girl, the classic cover model of some magazine, slim and with all her shape in the right place, taking a drink at the bar, looking seductively at him as she put the drink straw between her lips. Sam's hormones had not let him repeat twice that clear call to fuck directly in the bar's bathroom, a bathroom from which you were coming out as he was sticking his tongue down the throat of that fake and at the same time perfect babe, who in his arms looked so small and yet in the right place, toned against his strong muscles, as opposed to how you would have looked with your shapely body. You couldn't stand there and watch the boy you love for so long now make out with someone else, so without explanation you left and went back to the motel where you took two bedrooms for the case. Usually you take two rooms only when Dean wanted to find someone to take to bed, unlike Sam who kept his sex life much more private than his brother, but since he and Cas had come out a few months ago you had not taken the second room, having practically grown up together and thus having no problem sharing space. That night, however, when you had arrived in the small town Sam had insisted on taking a second room, and stubbornly had not told his older brother why when he had asked him, and somehow your heart was preparing for what would happen, but in fact nothing would totally prepare you for what you would see in that bar and how your heart would break.
Dean squeezes you tightly, as if he is afraid you will disappear at any moment, and that heartfelt squeeze only makes you break the weak dam you had built when you saw him come in, and you burst into endless weeping.
"I know baby, I know." That's all the blond man can manage to say to you, as he gets you up and carries you toward the bed, so you can lie down and take off your shoes, before coming close to you and holding you in his arms, until exhausted, you fall asleep safe in Dean's strong hold, while he whispers soothing words to you.
The next morning you wake up with the sun gently caressing your face from over Dean's shoulder. You smile for a second, imagining what it would be like to wake up in the other Winchester's arms, and soon after your heart, as if pierced by an arrow, bleeds at the memory of what happened last night. You get up, shifting your friend's arms, and go to the bathroom to wash and freshen up, when you hear the door to your room open, and a male voice, known even too well, shout to your still sleeping friend.
"Dean, wake up!" Sam yells, and you behind the door hold a hand over your heart, just imagining her beauty after her usual morning run to stay in shape. Her long dark hair tied back in a light bun, her forehead sweaty and muscles still tense from exertion.
"I'm awake, you asshole." Dean replies, as you hear him get up and go get some coffee. "You could have deigned to make less noise last damn night, you know there were people here who wanted to sleep."
You hear Sam snort at his brother's words, then respond to him in an aggressive, cold tone.
"Well then there are people who wouldn't want to see you run off to fuck wherever we go, hold hands all the time or make love wherever you are. And you know something else too Dean, I thought you were a better person. Why her? Come on you've had a lot of girls, and it wouldn't cost you anything to find a thousand more, why did you have to choose her!?" Says the younger brother, before leaving the room, slamming the door behind him.
You close your eyes and try to control your breathing as you feel yourself lacking oxygen. You feel tears coming to your eyes, but you try with all your strength to push them back down. You take a few minutes to control your emotions as all you want to do is fall to the floor on your knees and scream until you can't hear yourself anymore, but you stay strong and open the door to see Dean immediately in front of you, looking pained and guilty, seeing your state.
"You didn't tell him." You say in a calm, quiet voice, not asking, but stating that your best friend had not told about his new relationship with our angel friend.
"I never found the right time." Dean tries to say, then looks down. "I never had the courage, every time I seemed to miss the words."
"Sam would never judge you, and you know that." You say as you feel a pang inside your heart, remembering the words the man you love had used a few minutes earlier. You feel your clothes sticking to your body like glue, too tight, so tight that you feel as if they have pre torn. You feel how the floor gives way under your feet, you feel how a billion eyes are on you ready to judge you, you feel something inside you break, but you can't let anyone but yourself see how mere words have hurt you, so you grit your teeth and continue to look at Dean stoically, as you feel a single and only tear escape down your face.
"I know, but I'm afraid in the same way, I don't want it to end like last time." Dean confesses, still looking at the floor, but crying clearly, as his words take you back to when you were nothing more than kids and he had come crying to you one night, confessing that he had fallen in love with a boy he had met during his last case, and that his father after finding out had beaten him so badly that his scars remained, and had forced him to watch pornographic movies, reminding him how "a real man acts." No one had ever seen you as angry as Dean, and Bobby when he heard you scream and came to watch that night as you swore to heaven that you would kill John Winchester. Dean had never told Sam about that episode, not wanting to worry him since he had just run away to study at Stanford, and asked you to do the same. It has been so long since that night, yet the memory of that pain and that man still frightens the wonderful person in front of you.
"But I swear I will. He has no right to think such things about you! I-I will tell him-" He begins to say, as he tries to wipe away the tears running copiously down his face. You, moved in turn and knowing that like you he too was remembering that fateful evening, take his face in your hands and bring his eyes to gaze fixedly into yours.
"No, you won't do it now, you will do it when you feel like it." You comment chuckling as you caress his face. He looks at you unconvinced and you see his inner battle inside whether to accept your proposal or to be as always too good and allow the world to kick him in the balls.
"Please be selfish for once. And if I serve as your cover, so be it, not that I would have had any chance with him anyway." You continue, smiling at him as you feel your heart slowly shatter. You see Dean ready to retort, but you have already disappeared back into the bathroom, crying silently. Once the bathroom door is closed, you stop to look at yourself in the mirror and realize how disgusted you feel about your body.
There is not a single thing about you that you like: your thighs, your arms, your stomach, your chest.
The more you look at yourself, the more you want to break that all-too-truthful mirror, which tells an unfiltered reality, a sad truth that for so long you had tried to ignore, but which now that Sam had spit it in your face you could no longer pretend not to see. So you decide at this very moment that everything was going to change, you don't know how, but it was going to happen.
So weeks go by, Sam still won't talk to you, and slowly you continue to sink into the stupid realization that he doesn't because only he, like you, can really see your body, and that he hates you for it, so now convinced that you have to change your body to be loved, you begin to eat less and less and more rarely, and what little you put in your mouth to make Dean happy, who sees you getting sadder and more tired, is rejected from your stomach just moments later when no one is looking at you. This situation hurts your body and your heart, but you do it so that you can look at yourself in the mirror without wanting to punch him, but things seem to get worse and worse. You look at yourself and you never fit, before you saw a body you didn't like, now beyond that you see a person you don't like.
Dean is getting more and more worried about you, seeing you getting paler and paler and thinner, but every time he tries to talk to you, you put on a smile and pretend that everything is going well and that the only reason your shirts now look huge on you is that you are working out more, but he knows that you never liked sports and that is why he knows you are lying to him. He tried to talk to Sam about what was going on, but all his brother managed to say by pouting was that if he needed relationship advice to go somewhere else and that he didn't want anything to do with the two of you.
Dean was on the verge of smashing the plate he was holding in his face and yelling at him to open his eyes and see that you love him more than Dean does right now and that he is fucking in love with their favorite angel, but then he had seen Castiel's face and knew he couldn't let him down after he asked him to keep a low profile and let as few people as possible know about their relationship.
Dean had never felt so lousy as deciding between the love of his life and a friend in need, but he knew that if you found out what he had done you would insult him, so he played it cool and moved on, as if nothing had happened, while he continued to try to take care of you, with little success.
It's been almost a month since Sam had said those horrible things, and you're not getting worse and worse, but in order not to show it in front of your friends, you keep doing the same things as before, trying to have the same cheerfulness.
You are now hunting a werewolf in a remote town in a state you don't even remember. Your body is weak, you haven't eaten anything Dean has brought you in the last three days taken at the various fast food restaurants and bars he had found along the way, and what little you had put in your mouth had gone down the drain shortly thereafter, hating yourself just for having the idea that you could eat something. You feel your eyelids as heavy as shutters, the muscles in your body are nonexistent, and what few are left ache from the mere effort of standing and walking, while your head throbs incessantly.
In this you are scouting around where the last victims had been killed, to see if you can find any more information, but so far you have not had much success, so you decided to split up.
You are barely holding the flashlight in your hand, too heavy for you, when you feel a sudden dizziness that forces you to lean against the wall. You stay a few minutes trying to catch your breath, eyes closed, breathing in the cool night air around you, when you hear a noise coming from a short distance away from you, like a dog growling. With difficulty you open your eyes and see before you a sight that is frightening to say the least: the werewolf you were looking for is looking at you ravenously, while a dark laughter rumbles from his belly to his mouth. Quickly you try to pick up the phone to call Dean or Sam, but unfortunately your mind is so clouded that you can't even do simple things like this and the phone slips out of your hands to the monster's feet.
"The Winchesters' little friend!" He says, seeing who you were trying to contact. "I've heard a lot about you, among the monsters you are known as their true weakness: so small and helpless, you wouldn't even survive my bite, I'll do you a favor and eat your miserable heart." He continues as he gets closer, and you do whatever comes to your chin at this moment, as you feel death coming slowly but comfortingly too, like an old friend you haven't seen in a long time. You scream Sam and Dean's name as loud as you can, hoping that at least one of them can hear you, your lungs aching from how much breath you had to use and your throat burning from the effort as you feel your strength failing.
You lean back against the wall again, this time with your back, and let yourself slide down to the floor, as your vision goes completely black and your ears become plugged as when you go too deep underwater, and the world seems more and more distant. You have one last flicker of life before you pass out completely in that dark alley, at the mercy of that monster, and you hear Sam's voice call out your name for a moment.
Your heart loses a beat, and then completely dark.
You awaken with a jump and a gasp as you sit up on the bed on which someone has carried you. Your head immediately begins to spin like a spinning top, and your vision fails again as you feel a warm hand settle on your shoulder and bring you back to lie down.
"Relax, you're safe now. It's okay." Says in a low, soft tone a rough voice, leading back to Sam. You, shocked to know he is there next to you, open your eyes with difficulty and find yourself lying on the bed in your room, in the bunker, as you see him kneeling beside your bed. His face shows the weariness he feels, but in his eyes shines a strange hope as he looks at you mixed with sadness. You place your gaze on the rest of the room and see your favorite chair, where you usually sit to read your books or do your research when you are tired of sitting in the library, covered with blankets and pillows, making you realize that your favorite giant has been sleeping there for what seems to be even more than a couple of days, otherwise everything looks the same, unchanged, and strangely everything now seems to make more sense with the presence of Sam and some of his things in the room. Immediately you slap yourself in the face at that thought, reminding yourself that he hates you, and that the reason he is here is because Dean will have had better things to do than watch you sleep.
You're about to tell him that he can leave, and leave you alone, knowing that he doesn't even want to be in the same room with you, as he has shown recently, and that in case his brother asks you, you won't tell him, but he beats you to the punch and starts talking.
"First of all I want to say I'm sorry, you don't even know how much, and I certainly understand if you never forgave me in your life, because I wouldn't forgive myself." Sam says, as you see tears forming in his eyes. You try to stop him, confused as to why he was making that speech, but he stops you in turn and begs you to let him finish.
"We found you just in time, by "luck," if you can call it that, that asshole had decided to torture you a bit before eating your heart, and we got there before he could do it, but when Cas touched you to treat you he said he didn't know if you would survive anyway because your body was too weak since you hadn't eaten for too many days. Dean insulted me and even beat me up a bit before explaining the matter from his point of view." You can't help but widen your eyes, and Sam chuckles seeing your expression, as two tears run down his face, and he darkens a little again before continuing, without looking you in the eye.
"Yes, he also told me about Cas, and also about that affair with our father to make me understand why you decided to cover for him."
You close your eyes for a moment, expecting a series of insults, but you only feel his lips rest on your hand, so you open them again and see him leaning over the bed, as you feel his tears coming hot to contact your cold hand.
"Thank you." The boy confesses in a whisper. "Thank you for everything you did for Dean, thank you for always taking care of him when I couldn't or was too blind and stupid to, I don't deserve to have you in my life."
You can't find the words, and so you do the only thing you can think of this moment, and you take his hand and squeeze it, while barely smiling at him.
"We will always have helped each other, you remember. Then Dean will be your brother, but it's like he's my brother too." You say as you pull his face up and force him to look into your eyes. You see him cry even harder, a few sobs escaping his lips, as he squeezes your hand even tighter.
"I'm sorry, I promised I would always protect you, and instead I was so stupid and jealous that I didn't realize what I was doing." He tells you again, only to stop for a moment and look at you this time with a resolve he lacked until a few seconds ago. "Why did you stop eating? How come you covered your mirror in the bathroom? Dean found the remains of the one from before in the garage, thought you didn't like it and got a new one, so he changed it for you."
Immediately you remember, one night in a rage after looking at yourself in the mirror for the umpteenth time, you had started punching it until it had become nothing but stardust under your bleeding fingers, and the next day when you had returned from your walk with the dog, you had found a new one, with a note from Dean who had said that seeing that you had taken it off, thinking that you didn't like it anymore, he had bought a new one, so realizing that you couldn't escape that vicious cycle and knowing that if it happened one more time it would arouse even more suspicion, you had simply covered it up, and hoped that no one would ever learn of that dirty secret, and instead, here it all was for all to see.
You look at Sam in those damned puppy-dog eyes of his, and burst into desperate weeping. He, seeing you in this state, instinctively picks you up and holds you in his arms.
"I disgust myself Sam." You finally manage to utter those damn words, and immediately you feel as if your soul lightens as you feel his arms grip your body even tighter as if you could disappear at any moment, and at the same time he does it with an innate delicacy, as if it were a precious crystal figurine that can be broken under his gaze. "I'm disgusted by my body, I'm disgusted by every single thing about me, and you're disgusted by it too, don't lie to me. I thought if I lost weight things would get better, but they don't, I feel worse and worse." You continue, while somehow trying to get away from him.
"In what sense would you disgust me? When would I have ever said such a thing?" He asks confusedly as he looks at you, tears have dried on his face. His eyes range and seem to want to imprint your every little detail in his memory. His gaze makes you blush as you try to find the words to tell him how his words have done nothing but unleash a storm that had long been locked up somewhere inside you and was just waiting to be released. So you take a deep breath and tell him everything, while he looks at you attentively and astonished, his arms still around his body, as if he needs reminding that you are there beside him, and that you are not just a product of his mind.
You tell him everything, every little thing you had felt hearing his words while you were locked in that damn bathroom, your feelings and emotions in the month to follow, along with all the thoughts and all the actions you had put in place in the hope that he would no longer hate you, and that maybe you would hate yourself less, too. He starts crying again, and hides his face in the crook of your neck.
You stay a few minutes clasped to each other, in silence, after you have poured your heart out in front of him, ready to suffer the consequences, when he takes your face in his hands and stares at you steadily with those chocolate-colored eyes of his, and for a moment you feel your breath short.
"Don't ever think of such a thing again. Never. You are perfect exactly as you are, there is nothing I would change about you, there is nothing I don't love about you." At his words you stand still, as if petrified, afraid that a single movement of yours could mean the breaking of this beautiful illusion. "Yes, I am tired of holding all this in, I love you, I love you so much that I am sick just thinking about not having you near me for a second, I love you so much that I would have been ready to kill my brother for stealing the girl I love all my life, I love you so much that I would be ready to climb the highest mountain in the world and scream it to everyone!" He continues as he stands up on the bed, and begins to move his arms quickly, just enough to make you laugh. At the sound of your laughter he turns to look at you, and smiles even more, to return next to you on his knees and cup your face in his hands. "I love every little, tiny thing about you madly. I'm crazy, crazy in love, and I was a fool because I was so convinced that getting away from you would be better for you, that I didn't realize that you were suffering because of me, and I'm sorry. On the one hand I would like to let you go and make you happy, but on the other hand I am an extremely selfish being and I only want you for myself." He continues as he rests his forehead on yours, whispering the last words. "I love you, and I'm sorry."
You look at him, and not even realizing what you are doing, you take his face in your hands and bring his lips to yours. The kiss you exchange arises as sweet and gentle, like two flames dancing in an elegant dance side by side, testing each other's reaction, in the same way your lips move over each other, slowly tasting that new sensation. You feel her soft lips caressing yours, until neither of you has a single breath left.
"I love you too if you hadn't realized it idiot." You comment making him laugh. "I love you, and for so long I would have preferred not to because it made me sick, yet I could do nothing but love you. The only reason that kept me alive was my love for you, even though it was also my poison." You continue by looking into his eyes, and you see the pain in his.
"If you forgive me, I will do everything to correct what I have done." He looks at you, with a penitent and pleading gaze, as he takes your hands in his, before you release one and place it on his right cheek, and he instinctively leans into your hands, seeking that simple contact.
"I've already forgiven you moron." She laughingly comments, before throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him again, but this time the air in the room is different. The atmosphere becomes more erotic and intriguing. You feel his hands carefully explore your body, running his hands down your sides from your breasts to your butt, where he rests his large, warm hands, before slipping them under your T-shirt and caressing the skin of your back, making you shiver. You feel his hand rise higher and higher to the level of your bra and undo the hook that held it, but then he stops. Parting your lips he looks into your eyes for a second.
"If you don't feel up to it it's perfectly fine honey, we can stop here-"Sam says unsure, but you stop him.
"Afraid it's too much for you Winchester?" You ask as you raise your eyebrows, and see him smile, before resting his lips on yours, then creating a trail of kisses from your mouth to the chest exposed by the shirt you are wearing, down your neck.
"God, how I've missed you." He comments between kisses, but then stops again and looks at you seriously. "Anyway, I wasn't kidding myself, if you don't feel comfortable we can stop here."
You look at him, in his eyes only the pure affection and love you feel for him, and then put an end to all his doubts.
"I want to do it Sam." You say in a whisper as you take the bottom of his shirt with your hands and slowly slip it off, thus also dropping the bra he had unfastened a few minutes ago. "I want to do it with you Sam."
He looks at you and doesn't let you tell him twice, and he resumes his attack on your neck, leaving obvious signs of his passage, and then moves on to your breasts.
"God, you're perfect." He whispers before teasing one of your nipples. You moan softly at that sensation, feeling his teeth clench, his lips kiss and his tongue lick every single inch of your body, worshipping you like a goddess, a queen, tasting every inch of your skin.
This wonderful moment is interrupted, however, by the unannounced entrance of Dean, who, seeing the scene of his brother splayed across your body as he kisses your breasts, and with one hand explores the rest of your body, while you clutch his long hair in your hands, moaning his name shamelessly, lets out a small scream, before closing the door again.
"Damn you guys could warn." Comments the older brother, as Sam with speed grabs a blanket to cover you.
"Should we announce? You're the one who entered the room unannounced!" Sam replies in turn, making an expression that makes you laugh. "You can still come in now jerk."
"Bitch." Dean retorts, to open the bedroom door again and have a stupid grin plastered on his face. "So, I see Sam hasn't exactly figured out how to talk and resolve a situation, usually the mouth should be free to talk, not busy sucking-"
"You try to say one more Winchester word and I'll tell everyone about Christmas with Cindy McWood." You threaten him, and see him whiten, before his smile returns to its former self.
"Well what can I say in that case guys, good conversation and be sure to use protection, I'm not ready to be an uncle." He says closing the door behind him, then opening it again. "Not that I wouldn't make a great uncle, but I would say I'm too young and then-"
"Out!" You and Sam scream in unison, and the only thing Dean does is give you the finger before walking away. The two of you stand still for a moment weighing what just happened and burst out laughing, before Sam's lips find yours again.
"Where were we?" He asks you next, and you can't help but smile and moan at feeling his lips on you again.
It's shaping up to be a very interesting night, long but interesting, and you know that in the end maybe by tomorrow morning you can slowly look at yourself in the mirror, seeing the reflection of the man you love behind you supporting you.
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Save Yourself - Ch. 19
Dean Winchester x Female Reader
Oh For One So Pure
Series Summary: “I promise.” Those two words would trap you in a life you never wanted. You are an artist, a hunter, a Winchester. And yet the pain in Dean’s eyes as demanded you live the life he wants you live, you couldn’t say no. You met the Winchesters by chance, found out they were real people. And you figured it was a once in a life time thing, but then Dean called you, and so did a new job. Both leading to the life you wanted, a family that didn’t begin or end in blood and a once in a life time love. And he said leave it and him behind, forget. But you can’t. Chapter Summary Jack is gone. Well, you know exactly where he is; with Mary in what you’ve all agreed is the Apocalypse world. Do any of you know how to get there? No. But what are Winchesters really good at? Distracting themselves with hunting. When Donna calls in a favor for hunting down a possible not-so-supernatural creep, the three of you practically leap through the phone. But this case, and the multiverse problem none of you know how to untangle, bring up some dormant feelings about what it means to be a hunter… and even more about what it means to be a Winchester.
Warnings: Cannon typical violence, some fluff, some sad feels
You’ve been a Winchester long enough to have seen some crazy shit. And you’ve been a Supernatural fan long enough to know all the crazy shit. And when Donna called in a favor to find her niece, you kinda hoped it would be the most black and white monster case you could find. And as expected it was not. Finding a black market ebay for body parts wasn’t something you thought could exist. But if there’s a market, someone will always be there to fill it.
“I can’t believe you’ve been through this.” You grimace as Doug’s temporary fangs disappear.
“At least everyone here has souls.” Dean looks over at Sam, who purses his lips together as if he wishes he could forget that whole incident. Your phone buzzes in your pocket and you quickly silence it.
“That’s the fourth time it’s rung.” Dean comments, raising a brow at you.
“Becky. I missed the last two meetings.” You confess. You were normally pretty good about warning her when you’d be busy with a hunt; but everything with Jack being so unpredictable…
“Call her back, we should be back at the bunker tomorrow.” Dean gives your hand a squeeze. You nod and walk out into the brisk night air.
“Hey, sorry about the last couple of weeks-”
“THANK GOD YOU’RE ALIVE!” She shouts into the phone. “I thought the worst when your phone kept going to voicemail.” She lets out a long sigh, taking a few deep breaths.
“I could see that.” You chuckle.
“Don’t give me a heart attack like that!”
“I’ll do better in the future.” You hold up your hand in surrender. “But what’s up?”
“I have a few design projects I thought you could brainstorm on… And Sera’s been asking about the possibility of continuing the Supernatural books?” Her voice goes an octave higher at the mention of the books.
“Send me the ideas for the stuff to design-”
“Doug, wait!” You hear Donna yell.
“I’ll get back to you about the books-” You reach for the door to go back inside when it swings open and Doug runs into you.
“Doug?” You frown as he gathers himself. “Becky, I gotta go.” You abruptly hang up, lightly grabbing Doug’s shoulder. “Hey, what’s the rush?”
He stops, looking at you over his shoulder.
“Why do you stay?” He whispers, the defeat clear in his voice.
“Well, I sure as hell wasn’t going to leave Donna high and dry-“
“Why do you stay with Dean? Knowing about the– the monsters?” He corrects. The panic rolls off of him like a fog, tendrils curling and whispering for you to get lost in it.
“What do ya mean?”
“Your husband fights vampires, werewolves… monsters! Things that aren’t supposed to exist! How can you stay?” He harshly whispers, as if saying it too loud makes it any more true. You stare blankly at him; sure you’ve seen plenty of people shaken after their first encounter with the supernatural; but Doug? He’s had to have seen gruesome stuff in his time on the force.
“It’s his job,” you frown, “It would be the same if he were in the military or law enforcement.” You watch as he recedes into his whatever panic storm is happening in his mind. “Are you ok? Did you talk with Donna?” You place a hand on his shoulder, his whole body deflating at your touch.
“I wanted to be a cop to help folks. I didn’t sign on for monsters.” He looks off into the distance, the recent horrors he just witnessed clearly dancing in front of his eyes.
“That’s all Dean and Sam do, save people.” You smile, leaning forward until you catch his gaze. “They unfortunately didn’t have a no monster option. It’s also why Dean gets three hours of sleep a week, can drink a liquor store dry and has enough trauma that any regular person would go insane.”
“And you’re ok with that?” He scoffs, shaking his head at all the terrifying possibilities about what your words mean.
“I didn’t marry him because I think I can fix him. I love him, as he is.” You shrug, watching the thoughts churn in his head as he tries to figure out the next move. “You’re really going to give up Donna because she fights monsters?” You haven’t spent nearly as much time with Donna as you like, but the one thing you know for sure if you both will hang onto your husbands no matter the price.
“I don’t think I’m strong enough.” He whispers. You sigh, pulling him into a hug.
“She thinks you are. And so do I.” You squeeze him tight. “Can I tell you something?” You ask as you let him go. He gives you a small nod, wiping a tear away. “Leaving Donna won’t make the fear go away. It won’t stop you from looking at every person differently. It won’t change the fact that you know what lurks in the dark. But trust me when I say that having her by your side is better than any future without her.” He studies you for a moment, brain calculating all the scenarios.
“Does Dean feel that about you?” He whispers.
The question punches you right in the gut. It should have been a simple answer. A yes of course he does, that’s why we're married. But your mouth feels like it’s full of sand. Every moment where Dean has pushed you away, told you to leave, to forget, comes rushing to the forefront. And here you stand. Telling Doug he should stay; that he should want to stay. But you have no evidence that it would be good for him; that he could continue on with his life as normal. The one thing you learned being with Dean is that you were involved with the family business whether you wanted it or not. It’s just how it went being close to a hunter.
The motel door creaks open, Sam and Donna making their way to the car.
“Ready sweetheart?” Dean asks, taking your hand.
“Ya.” You smile at him, giving his hand a squeeze as you turn back to Doug. “Talk with Donna, she deserves that. You both deserve to make a decision together.” You give Doug a small smile, letting Dean guide you to the car.
_______
One thing nice about driving with the boys is you could boot Sammy to the front and sprawl out in the back. Dean even keeps a little blanket in the trunk for you. Leather seats are three things: cold, hot or sticky. Can’t have baby makin you uncomfortable sweetheart. You smile at the memory as you stare at the back of Dean’s head. The rain gently thumps at the windows, Sammy’s fingers clacking against the keys of his laptop.
“You were a little tough on Donna back there.” Dean states, keeping his voice low to not disturb you.
“What?” Sam frowns, the clacking coming to an abrupt stop.
“Just sayin’.” Dean shrugs, taking in a deep breath. He couldn’t believe he told Donna to let Doug go; Sam, telling her to let the love of her life go.
“Was I wrong? I mean, when has knowing us ever worked out for anyone?” His eyes flick to you as you roll to face the back of the seat.
“(Y/N)?” Dean shrugs.
“What?”
“It’s worked out for (Y/N), according to her.” Dean clarifies.
“Oh ya, I bet she always dreamed of falling in love with a guy who constantly tells her she can’t be a hunter because she could die. And who constantly makes life altering decisions for her.” Sam deadpans.
“We save people, Sam.” He points out. Save tons of people, every day, every year. That has to count for something.
“Yeah, we also get people killed, Dean. Kaia, for instance. She helped us and she died for it. And the list of (Y/N) getting hurt or almost dead isn’t exactly short.”
“Hey, look, I know you’re in some sort of a—”
“No, no, no, don’t – don’t… You keep saying I’m in a dark place, but I’m not, Dean. Everything I’m saying is the truth. It’s our lives. And I tried to pretend it didn’t have to be. I tried to pretend (Y/N) would be safe, that we could have Mom back and Cas and – and help Jack. But we can’t. This ends one way for us, Dean. It ends bloody.”
The three of you sit in silence. Dean always told you he would go down fighting; it always seemed to be the hand he was dealt. He just never actually died, so you both had agreed that maybe that’s not the true end designed for him. But Sam giving up on the happily ever after? That was just as bad as you giving up…
“You’re the reason she holds on so tight.” He whispers, seeing Sam turn toward him out of the corner of his eye. “You told her to always keep fighting; to fight for the life she wants, to fight for me. I was prepared to let her go years ago. Prepared for my soul to ache for the rest of my life.” He accuses. “But you’re the one who said to not give her up. To fight for her. Why –”
“Maybe I shouldn’t have.” Sam interrupts. You shift in your seat, moving your blanket to muffle the sound of your heart breaking.
_______
One would think spending their whole life fighting everything that lurks in the dark would make it uncomfortable. But as Sam lays in the pitch black of his room, he feels calm. He’s embraced the fact that he lives in the dark, like some creature waiting for whatever fight is next. No searching for something to hold on to, for hope about the future.
God was no better than any other supernatural being, Mom and Jack are as good as dead… After tossing and turning he gets up, easily making his way down the hall in the dark. He stops at your studio door and listens; he can hear the faint clicking of your keyboard accompanied by a faint static noise he can only assume is music. He gently pushes the door, you’re bopping your head along to whatever’s coming through your headphones as you mess with a project on your computer.
He lets his eyes wander around the room; it’s filled with fabric, blank canvases, half painted paintings, partially done costumes and a large wall of books. This room is very much you; warm, inviting and filled with things that make you happy. It was often a safe space for him, both when you were in it and when you weren’t. You both had many late night conversations about anything that came to mind, talked through a lot of the darkness he carried with him.
“Geezus Sammy!” You jump out of your chair, nearly knocking over your water bottle. “Scared the tarts out of me!” You move it out of arms reach and slide off your headphones.
“Right, sorry.” He frowns. You tilt your head to the side, walking over to him and gently taking his hands in yours.
“You ok?” you ask. He gives you a curt nod, eyes looking anywhere but at you.
“Whatever happened to that painting, the one with the two hands holding onto each other?”
“It’s here, haven’t got around to hanging it up.” You pull it out from a stack that’s leaned against the wall, putting it up on your easel and sliding the fabric sheet off to reveal it.
“Always keep fighting.” Sam mumbles, his fingers gently tracing the words. It’s written dozens of times in the background, your perfect sloppy writing making it feel like you’re telling him to do just that.
“Sammy!” You yell over your shoulder in the general direction of his room.
“Ya?” He yells back.
“Come here!”
He pads down the hall, standing in your doorway.
“Need you to hand model with me.” You wave him over. You take one hand, having him wrap his fingers around your wrist while you do the same. “Now pull.”
He pulls, a little too hard, and you ram into his chest.
“Not that hard Sammy!” you giggle.
“Ok, ok… not that hard. Got it.”
He huffs in amusement at the memory. It seemed silly at the time but it’s moving to see your hand holding him up, keeping him from slipping away.
“Why is one side written upside down?”
“Because love flows both ways.” You rotate the picture so now his hand is holding yours. You slot your hand into his, leaning your head on his arm as the two of you study it.
“What if holding on was the mistake?” He asks.
“It wasn’t.” You can feel him shift against you. “I didn’t walk into this life blind Sam.” You bite down on your tongue, praying the tears not to slip down your face. “I-”
He pulls you into his arms, squeezing you tight. He has always pulled you closer; pulled you into the hunting life, into his brother’s life, into his own life. Selfish. It was the only word that came to his mind. He always thought that karma would follow through. That every single monster he and Dean put in the ground would let them have just a sliver of something good. And he was hoping it would be you. But maybe Dean was right this whole time, you’ll only end up hurt or dead.
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Castiel taking to Y/N: "Did you get your baking done last night?"
Y/N looking confused: "I didn't bake anything last night Cas, why would you say that"
Castiel: "I heard you and Dean talking about cream pies and how Dean said he wanted to give you one"
Dean choking on his coffee, Y/N staring open mouthed
Sam laughing: "So Y/N did you give him what he wanted?"
Dean smirking: "Oh she did many times"
Castiel: "I believe we are not talking about baking"
Y/N: "I hate you all"
#incorrect supernatural quotes#incorrect spn quotes#supernatural incorrect quotes#dean winchester smut#dean winchester#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#dean winchester x female!reader#dean winchester x plus size reader#castiel#castiel novak#sam winchester
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