#carina honey you're so wrong

[mayasdeluca]

Maya putting Carina first/before her job

[ponderingmoonlight]

Hello Carina! I absolutely ADORE your works I'm hooked Was wondering if you could do Geto/Nanami/Gojo/Sukuna x fem reader who grew up in a toxic household that encouraged bad eating habits like eating extremely small amounts and tried to always make her a good and docile wife. But she left them and is now pretty successful but her eating habits are still pretty bad Please stay hydrated this summer!

A lot of you guys request stuff like bad heating habits from me and I'm actually a little scared that I receive a shit storm for writing these sensitive topics, but there you go! I decided on Geto since he is the sweetest boy ever but if this goes well and some of you guys show interest, I might write something similar for the other characters as well - enjoy <3

Geto encouraging his girlfriend to eat more after growing up in a toxic household

Pairing: Geto x fem!reader

Word Count: 1,6k

Synopsis: After your toxic parents tried to force you into their picture of a thin and docile wife, you left them as soon as possible and became the best version of yourself - if it wasn't for your bad eating habits still haunting you down when you're out with your boyfriend. Until he decides to have a talk with you...

Warnings: Just let me tell you right from the start that there's nothing wrong with being thin and I hope it's obvious that we're talking about an unhealthy connotation in this fic, if you get triggered when it comes to toxic parents and hurtful phrases regarding weight please don't read this. In general, this contains sensitive content and a few pieces of ED and harsh language, but our boy Geto telling us how much he loves us the way we are

„You know you are totally able to eat more than that, right? We’ve been out without any food for hours now, you need to care for yourself, love.”

Suguru’s hand gently caresses your back while you stare at the salad you just ordered.

“You’re gonna look like a pig soon if you don’t stop eating like one, (y/n). Didn’t I teach you a lady needs to watch her diet?”

“No man wants a fat woman, trust me.”

“Thank you so much for looking out for me. I’m good”, you mutter after shaking their cruel words off your mind.

You can’t bring yourself to catch a glimpse at his comforting brown eyes, not when your guilty conscience almost eats you up alive. The stinging words of your mother and father haunt you until this day. Even though you left years ago and started your very own life away from their toxic household, even though your precious boyfriend Geto Suguru is the living proof for them being wrong.

Just one look at the salad in front of you paired with your memory is enough to feel like in your childhood all over again.

“Hey, look at me honey.”

Gently, his hand caresses your cheek and lifts your head into his direction. There they are, his oh so loving orbs, his tender smile that warms your stinging heart in an instant.

“We’ve been together for a year now and you still seem to be upset when you have to eat around me. I can’t help but wonder why you torture yourself. Is it because of me, did I give you the feeling you aren’t good the way you are? Because I love you with all my heart.”

You never allowed yourself to cry in front of someone else. To be exact, you stopped when you were greeted by nothing but harsh words from your parents with every tear that ran down your cheek. You are supposed to be a good and hostile woman, the perfect little wife for some wealthy man your parents already decided on when you were still 10. A woman that doesn’t speak as much as you do, a woman who doesn’t eat as much as you do. A feminine angel walking on earth with the only purpose to say yes and amen to her beloved husband.

When you were finally old enough to leave them behind, you packed your things and joined jujutsu high. Life is easier around here with so many beloved friends by your side who support and truly love you. Yes, they showed you how good you are, that you are independent and are allowed to have your own opinion, that it’s okay to say no. Yes, you even started to eat a little more and gained a healthy amount of weight and well-formed muscles.

They were wrong. Your parents were so wrong with everything they taught you. But this…

You bite your lip when a sub escapes from deep down your throat, hot tears now stinging in your eyes so violently that you can’t catch your breath. Eating has always been your weakness, the one and only thing you can’t fully control until this day. Their words still crush you every time you order something to eat.

What if Suguru doesn’t find you attractive when you gain even more weight?

What if he thinks it’s disgusting to see you eat like a pig?

What if he’ll fall out of love when you show him that you aren’t as perfect as a doll?

“I’m so sorry. The last thing I want is to see you cry”, he instantly speaks out, wrapping his much-needed arms around you so tightly that you sink into his broad chest.

“It’s just…I’m afraid to eat more…”, you finally blurt out.

A part of your heart flutters in relief when those words finally leave your mouth. For more than a year, you simply forced yourself through the aching of your stomach, the hunger that kept you awake when Suguru laid next to you fast asleep. All because of their cruel words. All because they made you believe your whole life you aren’t good enough if you eat “too much”.

“You don’t feel comfortable eating around me, don’t you?”

You simply nod against his chest, too ashamed to lift your head. How embarrassing to hear those words leaving his lips, that he already knows why you’re acting this way.

“May I ask why? Did I say or do something that makes you feel this way, love?”

Your head starts spinning. The sheer thought that he might think your strange behaviour is his fault, that he did something wrong is ridiculous in your eyes.

“Absolutely not. It’s…It’s…”

Why is it so damn hard to find the right words? You stutter like an idiot for what feels like ages while listening to Suguru’s steady heartbeat. He knows how rough your childhood was, that your parents treated you like the dirt underneath their feet. You were never good enough, never pretty enough, never smart enough. Until you became a well-known and rich jujutsu sorcerer with a charismatic man like Geto Suguru by your side.

“See? I told you you will find a wealthy man if you keep up with our education, daughter.”

“All because we taught you everything you know and kept you in shape!”

“No”, you replied immediately, straightening your shoulders while facing the people who made your life living hell for more than enough years.

“I did all of this by myself. Because I chose to be the person I am instead of the person you wanted me to be.”

“They always told me I’m too much, that eating in front of my man is strictly forbidden. I was supposed to be a thin and docile wife.”

Your voice is nothing but a far away whisper. All those nights your father scolded you when you weighted more than you did before. How your mother screamed at you when your curves start to develop through puberty, how disgusted they looked at you when you wore shorts or ate next to them. Deep within, you know how toxic your eating habits are despite the positive changes you’ve been through. But still…Just the thought of eating a cheeseburger in front of Suguru fills you with so much disgust that your guts turn immediately.

“You aren’t docile but strong and stubborn. You aren’t only thin but strong and athletic. Your body is capable of so much more than simply being thin, (y/n). You are perfect in every single way, your body allows you to fight so well that even Satoru admires your skills. You are so breathtakingly beautiful that I could stare at you all day…I am glad you didn’t follow their rules, that you didn’t turn into the good and docile wife they wanted you to be. Because you became so much more. Because you can do so much more. But for that, you need to fuel your body the way it deserves it even when I’m around. I love to see you eat, I love to see you happy and healthy. And I know how hard it can be to overcome things you were taught from a young age. Would you promise me something?”

Now you can’t help but lift up your head, staring at him through your wet lashes. His words, his oh so sweet words still linger through your mind and force your cheeks to turn bright pink. Is this really how Suguru feels about you, are you really enough for him just the way you are?

Why wouldn’t you? After all, he was the one choosing you.

“What?”, you mumble.

“Promise me that we will work this out. If you can’t bring yourself to open up to me, please consider checking up with Shoko or another professional. I admire you for all the things you’ve already did, that you were actually able to turn into a wonderful woman with that horrible family. I’d love to hang out with you while eating chips, I’d love to eat a whole lot of unhealthy junk food and sweets with you without you worrying about my thought. Because the only thing I care about is that you’re happy. And you being healthy and eating properly means happiness.”

That smile. That oh so bright smile that reaches his brown eyes and lifts up your mood immediately. Oh, you truly don’t deserve him. A new wave of fresh tears threatens to spill over your eyes and begins to take your sight.

But those aren’t tears of sorrow. No, those are tears of pure joy and love.

You throw yourself around his neck before he’s able to catch you properly, causing both of you to almost fall off his chair.

“I will”, you mutter against his ear.

“I promise I will work on it.”

“I’m more than glad to hear that”, he replies softly while caressing your hair.

“Would you like to order something else in addition to your salad, then?”

You let go of Suguru with a small smile, holding his hands tightly as your heart overflows with love. The man who showed you what you’re capable of, who supports you through anything. Sooner or later, you will be able to share food dates with him and enjoy them. But until then…

“I’m fine for today. But next time, I might order something else.”

“Fine. Just let me know when you’re ready, (y/n).”

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[she-karev]

Mother's Day (Andrew DeLuca x Alex Karev's Sister Imagine)

Age Rating: 12+

Chapters: Two of Three

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy

Ship: Andrew DeLuca and Amber Karev

Canon Episode: Season 20 Episode 7

AN: Happy Mother’s Day again guys so this is another chapter that focuses on Andrew DeLuca and Amber Karev on this special occasion. Now I don’t know the timeline of season 20 due to the production being held back a year because of last year’s writers’ protests but I imagine it’s still around 2023 so this is where the chapter is set.

Summary: Amber is worried about how she is going to tell her and DeLuca’s daughter about their extended and estranged family.

Words: 6579

May 11, 2023

Amber walks down the hallway of her house in her casual gray shirt, jeans and green utility jacket. She put her hair up in a bun and her makeup is done casual. She enters the kitchen ready to get some coffee when an unexpected surprise comes her way.

“Sorpresa!” Andrew DeLuca yells out from the kitchen table holding their 7-month-old daughter in his arms presenting a plate of crepes with a cup of coffee to the left and a bowl of fresh fruit on the right.

Amber chuckles in delight, “What is this? My half birthday was two months ago.” She sits across from them salivating at the delicious looking French pastry that is filled with whip cream and covered in blueberries.

“Well, it’s Mother’s Day today and we felt like celebrating your first with a gourmet breakfast and.” He hands her a pink construction paper that has hand prints painted over it with pink glitter spilled on in and an I Love You written above showing that Lucy made it with the help of daycare, “A Hallmark level card courtesy of our future artist here.”

Amber smiles at the paper, “Aww well thank you both, oh dang she really loves that pink glitter, doesn’t she?”

Andrew chuckles, “Yeah you gotta see what we’ve been working on for daycare.” He pulls out a large white poster from under the table and on it is a family tree that is normally done for an elementary school project, “We’re doing present your family and let me tell you our little girl really likes crafting especially when she gets to spill pink glitter all over a canvas.” Andrew smiles at Lucy who is eating Gerber puffs, “Hopefully they can read all about your family over the pink glitter bambina. They probably don’t need to since your whole family works at the hospital and everybody knows who is related to who.” Amber’s smile falls as she looks at the tree solemnly which Andrew catches, “What’s wrong?”

Amber inhales and composes herself grinning again, “Nothing I’m just anxious about these crepes you made and hope I don’t die from sugar crashing.” Amber puts the poster away and eats her breakfast with Andrew looking at her worried but goes back to feeding their baby.

Later

After checking Dorian Cardenas’s labs and telling him he is gonna move out of the ICU, DeLuca exits the room with Yasuda and Adams behind him. He goes to a nurse’s station to check his schedule for the day. He has two surgeries for today and he has to go to daycare and present the family tree with Amber and Lucy. He found her behavior after she saw the tree strange and is wondering how to ask her what the issue is. Like he summoned her he sees Amber walking toward him in her baby blue scrubs.

“Hey how’s it going?”

Amber groans, “Well my blissful morning took a disastrous turn when I saw that tree our daughter did.”

Andrew’s eyes widen at that, “Honey she’s not even one you can’t expect her to be Artemisia Gentileschi overnight. Besides I helped so it should be me you're criticizing.”

“No, it’s not about how the tree looked it’s about what was on it or wasn’t.”

Andrew raises an eyebrow still confused, “Amber your gonna have to help me out here.”

Amber sighs, “The only photos there are us, her aunts Carina, Maya, Jo, her uncle Alex and her cousins Luna and Liam. What are we supposed to say about the rest of her family?”

“Ah I see now.” Andrew finally understands and works to relief his wife’s stress, “We’ll just tell her the truth it’s not a big deal.”

Amber narrows her eyes at him, “Okay so do you want to be the one to tell her about her grandfather who killed four patients in a manic state, her grandmother who had a stroke. Oh, and you also can’t forget her other grandfather who died right here in this hospital withdrawing from hard drugs until a tired resident went crazy and butchered his heart in an OR.”

Andrew presses his lips at the dark reminder and looks at Yasuda and Adams behind him who look both shocked and horrified by their family history.

Yasuda clears her throat, “What happened to this crazy resident? Did he get suspended from the OR?” Amber and Andrew look on in annoyance at the interns butting in.

“A guy like that who killed the father of an attending I would think jail or psych ward.” Adams theorizes.

“Well you’re both wrong.” Andrew quickly informs them, “He got offered a job at a state of the art medical research facility out of the country.”

Adams and Yasuda look at them blankly over the cruel irony, “…How come he got that after killing your dad but we didn’t after trying to save a patient?”

The question by Adams pisses Amber off more who glares at him, “Because I wasn’t around to kick his ass or kill him which is what you all are gonna get if you interrupt my private family matter between me and my husband now hush!”

Andrew shakes his head at them and turns to Amber, “You're forgetting your mother.”

Amber chuckles at him darkly and stops abruptly with a frown, “No she does not count. She hasn’t even reached out when I told her about the pregnancy.”

“Maybe because you usually tell that news with a call and not a text to someone who still uses a home phone.” Andrew reminds her.

Yasuda speaks, “Wait you told your mother you were pregnant through a text?”

Amber glares at Mika who cowers in fear, “What are my rules?”

“Speak when you tell me to.” Yasuda repeats and shuts up.

Amber turns back to Andrew who has another suggestion, “What about your brother, the other brother Aaron?”

Amber raises an eyebrow, “You did not just say that.”

Andrew sighs, “Look it’s been over three years I think you’ve punished him and your mother enough. The both of them are alive, working on their mental health and sober by our family standards we got the golden ticket.”

“I’m pretty sure you don’t get a famous chocolate factory here.” Lucas quips.

Andrew glares at him, “Speak when your spoken to applies to you as well Adams.” Lucas quiets causing Andrew to focus back on Amber who looks sad at their family situation, “Every family tree has a few nuts in them babe.”

“Some more than others.” Yasuda mutters.

“Do you want a slap to the face Yasuda?” Amber asks viciously causing Mika to swallow.

“I-I’m so sorry my mouth speaks before my brain and I have a dark sense of humor and-”

Amber ignores her and focuses on Andrew, “My brother is out of the question he made it so after our wedding and hasn’t apologized for it since. No, he lost the right to get to know his niece.” Amber inhales deeply with Andrew looking concerned, “You know what it’s fine we’re fine. Lucy has so many people who love her more than the people cut from her life she’ll be fine.”

Andrew knows her too well to fall for that, “You’re doing that thing where you try to convince yourself everything is fine when it isn’t.”

“I didn’t have doting grandparents or uncles growing up, it sucked but Lucy has us and so many other family members within walking distance. It will soften the blow once we tell her about our Clive Barker horror family tales. We’ll flip a coin on who gets to tell her, I gotta go to the pit. I’ll see you later.” Amber walks away from Andrew who looks at her worried while Adams pitches in.

“She really told her mom she was gonna be a grandma in a text?”

“That’s my wife your judging Adams so watch it.” Andrew turns to the interns, “Transport Dorian to a patient room and monitor his vitals and I cannot stress this enough. If one of you ignores your duties again, I will have Amber DeLuca unleash her pent-up rage against her family on you and I think you learned from her brief history recap how brutal we can be especially on lazy interns.” Yasuda and Adams look scared but nod understanding, “Good now go.” The interns leave DeLuca to go inside Dorian’s room while he exhales still worrying about Amber.

Later

Amber gowns up at the pit to prepare for the incoming double trauma in front of Kwan and Millin who start to annoy her as Millin chants.

“Chest tube, chest tube, chest tube, chest tube. I have one left on my procedure log.”

Amber starts to walk out with them and Kwan converses with Millin, “Ah me too. Want to bet who finishes first?”

“Loser buys drinks at Joe’s?”

“You’re on.”

“Game faces people.” Amber reminds them as she approaches Hunt and Link when the blaring ambulances stop at the bay.

“I got this one, Link you got the other.”

“Okay Millin you’re with us, Kwan go with Link.” Amber orders and they separate. Millin follows Amber and Hunt to the ambulance when the doors open revealing a woman on a gurney with a collar on.

“What do we got?”

“Gillian Mendelson, 46. Status post MVC.” The paramedic explains while Hunt does a neuro exam, “GCS 15. Brief LOC. Small head lac. Complaints of headache.”

Gillian is awake and speaks, “I’d think it’s a migraine if I wasn’t just in a car accident.”

“Okay let’s get you inside to check you out.”

Gillian speaks stopping them, “Wait! I-I want to make sure Cassandra’s okay.” They look to their left at the ambulance next to them and see a woman coming out on a gurney in far less severe shape than Gillian. Amber notices her serene expression and glassy eyes, “Cass you okay babe?”

Cassandra responds in a loose voice, “Remember when the kids were at soccer camp and we tried those gummies?”

Amber answers for her, “I think she’s okay.”

“We got to make sure you are too. Let’s go.” Both teams wheel their patients into the pit.

Meanwhile

Andrew opens the door allowing Yasuda and Adams to wheel in Dorian into his new room.

Yasuda tries to hype him up, “Smells of antiseptic, doesn’t have a view, but…”

“It’s not the ICU.” Adams finishes, “And-”

“Surprise” A man and woman jump out of the bathroom smiling and holding a GET WELL SOON, D sign. Andrew smiles at the perfect timing as he helped them plan a surprise jump out for Dorian who needs a little happy in his life. It works because he’s smiling for the first time in a while.

“No way. James? Fiona?”

Andrew explains, “They reached out and insisted on being here. I hope that’s okay.

“More than okay. We’re in the same engineering program. Well, we were.”

“Don’t worry. We brought all your work from last semester so you can catch up.”

“No, we didn’t, jerk.” Fiona lightly pushes him, “We did bring a bunch of cards from people back at school though. Everybody misses you, D.”

“Not entirely sure why.”

Dorian chuckles at James joke as DeLuca inserts his IV, “All right, let’s get you settled here and hopefully you won’t be here for long.” Dorian exhales in relief as DeLuca gets to work.

Later

After they found out that their patient Gillian is married to someone else and that Cassandra is her mistress Owen requested that she get a CT to rule out any neuro injuries. Amber found the situation both amusing and sad, amusing because she had to hide Cassandra’s bra when Aaron walked in and sad because Aaron seemed like a guy who didn’t deserve to be in a situation like this where his wife is sleeping with her friend behind his back. It makes her think about how her own messy family life which brings her back to issue of her nuts in the family tree and how her daughter will handle it.

“How long does this take?” Gillian asks while she is inside the MRI with Hunt and Amber observing from the monitor room.

“It should be quick.”

“Well, I was hoping it would be longer. If my head wasn’t pounding, I’d just as soon stay.”

Amber presses the intercom, “Just try to relax Gillian, imagine you’re lying on a beach getting a suntan. It doesn’t feel like it but that what imagination is for.”

“You want to know how I got in this mess, don’t you?” Gillian asks in shame with Hunt saying no and Amber overlapping with a kind of causing her to explain, “Aaron and I got married right after law school. We had our kids; we did our jobs. And then the kids were older, and work was-Well, I do tax law, and all of it just got so boring. Uninspiring.” Amelia walks in to check the brain scan, “But then I met Cass at the PTA, and she made life not boring. So here I am with a giant headache. Literally and figuratively.

“Complicated.” Amber snaps out of it and turns to Amelia.

“Do you see a subarachnoid hemorrhage or maybe an epidural hematoma?”

“No, her scan’s clear. Situation’s a mess. Well, good luck.”

Amber purses her lips and nods while Shepherd leaves. She presses the intercom so Gillian doesn’t hear her, “No offense to Gillian but I would take boring any day of the week including Sunday. Chaos can be exhilarating but then the high dies and you end up in pain and innocent people suffer the consequences of your mistakes.”

Hunt turns to Amber with a worried look and decides to pry, “Is everything okay with DeLuca?”

“No, we’re fine I’m talking about my family as in the ones who don’t live here.” Hunt still looks confused and Amber sighs at his expression, “I have to figure out how to explain to my precious and innocent child that her grandparents are either dead, manic or schizophrenic. It’s a can of works that’s gonna make her seriously question her sanity and her parents for thinking it was a good idea to mix our time bomb genes together. And my brother who I would go to for this picked this week to go to Nebraska for a peds surgery.”

“Your side has schizophrenia and DeLuca’s is bipolar, those are conditions that can be monitored and treated with the right therapy and medication. And if it makes you feel better medicine is advancing constantly and when she reaches that age the medications, she can take could be more effective with little side effects than it has today.” Amber nods feeling a tiny bit better, “And as for when you tell her you just have to take it one step at a time. If she’s anything like you apart from looks she’ll be fine. Kids are tough and they adjust well to bad situations better than adults. You of all people can understand that.”

Amber looks back at Gillian, “One thing is for sure Gillian’s head is not the only thing that’s gonna blow up.”

Meanwhile

Andrew and Carina walk down the hall to talk about Amber’s concerns as he is also starting to let it sink in. He hadn’t really considered it but now that Amber brought it up, he can see why she was worried. It’s hard to give your child the sex talk when they reach teen hood but how do you explain the whole messy family history that involves murder, death and insanity.

“I tried to tell her it wasn’t a big deal but the more I think about it I start to realize she’s right.” Carina sips her coffee paying attention, “I mean it was bad enough for us with just papa but for Lucy she has papa and so many other family tales that will make her use a nightlight for the rest of her life.”

“It’s not that bad it could be worse.”

Andrew scoffs in disbelief and counts with his fingers as he recaps to her, “Junkie grandpa who was murdered, manic grandpa who killed four patients, grandma who died of a stroke and a schizophrenic grandma who probably doesn’t know she exists. Can you think of a family that’s worse than that? Maybe the Stark’s from Game of Thrones or the Lannister’s definitely the Targaryen’s.”

Carina sighs, “I swear you and Maya are alike sometimes. She told me she was worried her genes were gonna ruin the baby because of how her father treated her. It’s the hormones but I know it’s from a deep-rooted fear that you have as well. We’re not our parents Andrea and neither are our precious babies.”

“Aren’t you worried at all about how Liam is gonna take it when you tell him about his cruel grandfathers and his homophobic uncle living on the streets?”

“Of course, I am but the good thing about growing up the way we did is that we know how to help our children process very shocking information. We just have to remind them of the people who love them and that despite how we were raised we are not gonna do to them what our parents did to us.” Andrew nods processing her advice, “Lucy is gonna be okay and so is Liam you just have to be prepared for when they have questions and answer them as honestly and as gently as we can.”

Andrew nods thankful for having a wise sister, “Thanks, I needed to hear that…You know Liam is lucky to have a mom like you, he’s gonna grow up great.” Carina looks away bashful, “I know this because he’s not the first kid you raised. That was me.”

Carina grins at Andrew gratefully who grins back, “Thank you I needed to hear that too.” Her phone beeps and her grin fall, “911 from Jo I have to go.” Carina runs away leaving Andrew in the dust.

Later

After ruling out neuro injuries in CT, Hunt and Amber moves Gillian back to the pit and gave her an ice pack for the headache. Aaron was waiting for her and is agitated but the news they give him.

“What do you mean her scan is clear?”

“Aaron.”

Aaron persists, “You’re clearly in pain.”

Amber explains, “Her scans showed no obvious hematomas or hemorrhages but we’re gonna find out what’s causing the headaches.”

“We’re gonna keep her in for observation. This could be a concussion. She did hit her head pretty hard.”

Aaron looks confused at Hunts diagnosis, “You did?”

“It’s how she got the cut.” Amber explains as Gillian looks flustered clearly afraid of being exposed.

“Why didn’t the airbag inflate?”

“Oh, uh, it did. I-I hit the door.” Gillian lies, “Can we not talk about this now?”

“But the cut’s on the right side of your head.” Amber presses her lips at Aaron getting closer to the harsh truth with Hunt stepping in.

“Listen, the good thing is-”

Aaron interrupts and keeps pestering Gillian, “If you were driving, the door would be-”

Gillian groans, “Oh, my head is really pounding.”

Amber clears her throat, “Just keep the icepack on the head Gillian, Mr. Mendelson why don’t you take a walk while your wife recuperates, I think that would be-”

Aaron ignores her, “She hit you so hard that it flipped you in your seat? That woman should definitely not be driving our kids around. She’s irresponsible and-”

“WE’RE HAVING AN AFFAIR!” Gillian yells out so loud the whole pit hears her.

“And there’s the blow up.” Amber whispers to Hunt both of them feeling awkward as Gillian spills the dirty beans.

“What’d you say?” Aaron asks in shock.

“An affair! You know, sex? The thing you and I never have anymore. That’s what Cass and I were doing in the back seat, like we’ve been doing for two years. Two years! Any more questions?” Aaron looks at his wife hurt but doesn’t speak instead he leaves in pain with Hunt and Amber as a front row audience to the farce, “I felt a lot better yelling at him.”

Amber nods, “Well, sometimes getting it all out can be a huge relief to the psyche.”

“No, no, I-I feel awful now, but when I’m yelling…MY HEAD DOESN’T HURT!” Amber jumps in shock at the sudden outburst and looks at Hunt who is also confused by this new development.

Later

Amber walks into the lobby rubbing her ear with her finger after getting Gillian back into CT. Her patient was screaming the whole time because it made her head feel better. They were able to diagnose her and sent her to an O.R. before she damaged all of their ear canals. Amber spots Andrew charting by the station in his navy scrubs and navy-blue scrub cap with a constellation pattern on it.

Amber stands next to him leaning against the station on her elbows, “Hey.”

Andrew smiles at her, “Hey I heard about your patient who screamed in your face.”

Amber chuckles, “She didn’t scream at me she screamed so she could relieve her cranial pressure. We sent her up to neuro, it should be a simple procedure. I just hope she doesn’t scream while Shepherd is in her brain.”

“It would be an interesting sight.” Amber smiles at that when they hear a familiar voice yelling at someone behind them.

“Because he was shot!” Amber and Andrew quickly turn around to find Lucas Adams yelling at Dorian’s friends in the middle of the waiting room, “Three bullets went into his body. He’s been hanging on by a thread for weeks.”

Andrew looks on in shock and anger, “Damn it come on.” Amber and Andrew move towards Adams who keeps admonishing Fiona and James who look at him in hurt shock.

“And he’s already feeling disconnected enough not knowing how long he’ll be here. He doesn’t need to listen to stories about people he doesn’t know or graduations he won’t attend. He just needs to know that you’re actually here for him.”

Andrew reaches Adams and sternly orders him, “Adams take a walk right now.”

He ignores him and keeps going, “Maybe it’s for the better that you weren’t here. You obviously have no idea what he’s been through.”

Andrew grabs Adams elbow forcing him to face him as he glares at him in anger and disappointment, “Go find a dark corner somewhere while I clean up your mess again. Now.” Adams stands there with a pissed off look forcing DeLuca to yell, “Now!” Adams leaves in a huff. Amber follows him to get answers while her husband apologizes to the victims of Adams tirade.

She catches up to him in the towel room, “What the hell was that?! Are you out of your damn mind?!”

Adams quickly turns to face her, “Dorian’s been here for 51 days, and they waited till now to visit him?”

“He didn’t want them here!” Amber explains, “Post op day 15 his phone was blowing up with texts from them asking him where he was. He told me to text back that he was okay they didn’t even know about what happened until two weeks ago. But even if that wasn’t the case that doesn’t warrant you to verbally assault his friends, do you really think that’s how a doctor is supposed to talk to his patients loved ones?! You have disappointed me in a new way that I didn’t think even you were capable of.”

“And what are you gonna do huh? Cut me off like you cut your own mom and brother out of your life?”

“Adams watch it!” Amber registers Andrew behind her speaking in a protective tone.

“Can anybody live up to your standards?” Adams asks her in anger, “Are you really such a perfectionist that you toss your own blood in the garbage for what is no doubt a little mistake that you can’t overlook. You didn’t even tell them about your daughter you just assumed they would be fine with you deserting them.”

Andrew opens his mouth to speak but Amber beats him to it as she glares up at Adams in rage, “You have no right to think you know anything about me or my family! You don’t relive the memory of your mother chasing you around the house with a knife and watching your brothers hold her down and force her to swallow pills so she wouldn’t kill me. Or how after you married the love of your life you called your brother who told you that you were making the biggest mistake of your life and that you were gonna end up alone and beaten just like your mother. If you had even one moment in your life that amounts to that pain and excuses your outbursts, please tell me!” Adams looks at her blankly confirming her answer, “I thought so. Now if I hear you yelling at a patient or family member like that or hear this childish tantrum at another superior surgeon, I will personally see to it that you are suspended without pay!” Adams looks down on the floor, “Get out of my sight.” Lucas walks away still furious at both his bosses and Dorian’s friends. Amber pinches the bridge of her nose and turns to Andrew with a frustrated look, “I swear I am close to killing that kid if he keeps pissing me off.”

“We both know he’s gonna keep pissing you off.” Andrew steps closer to Amber and grips her shoulder to bring her back down to earth, “He’s an idiot and you shouldn’t take what he said to heart. You didn’t abandon your mom and brother you just have a relationship that works better long distance.”

Amber sniffles, “He…He raised me and he loved me, he is the reason I was standing when Alex left. God he was my cheerleader when I was a cynical, snarky as hell goth teenager, and let me tell you I was a walking nightmare.” Andrew smirks at that as Amber continues, “I would always tell him that he wasn’t like our mother after he was diagnosed. Whenever he would get depressed, I just reminded him that no matter what he was the same fun, kind, pain in the ass big brother I grew up with.” Amber’s eyes turn watery with Andrew looking down at her in pity, “But when I told him I was getting married to you he…he said I was repeating what our mother did. He said I was gonna end up like our mother, married to an abusive asshole who left me to raise the kids on my own.”

Andrew inhales at the memory of comforting Amber after her last call to Aaron that led her to cry on his shoulder as he rocked her in his lap. Amber chuckles lightly wiping a tear away, “I guess I have myself to blame for that. He, Alex and Jackson were the ones I turned to when things were bad between us. Hearing your sister crying about how everyone she loves goes crazy and attacks her makes you hate the person responsible for the rest of your life.”

“Hey, come on don’t do that.” Andrew tips her chin up with his finger so he can look into his eyes. He looks into her tear stained eyes and says earnestly, “Don’t blame yourself for turning to the people you love when you were at your lowest. A low that I put you at by the way. If you want to blame someone for your brother’s bad choice of words then blame me. Blame me for hurting you and making your brothers hate me so much they couldn’t tell they hurt you too.”

“You didn’t choose the mania.” Amber reminds him.

“No but I did choose to ignore your concerns and lashed out when you tried to help me. Maybe Aaron could have expressed his worries differently but he did what he did because he loves you and wants to protect you. I know that because it’s how I feel about my sister. You don’t have to forget what he said, you just have to find a way to move past this with him. I said a lot worse than him and we moved past it and we’re better than ever. If we can do that after the hell, we’ve endured then you and your brother can do the same.”

Amber looks at Andrew in awe as she cradles his stubbly cheek, “How did I get so lucky?”

“I ask myself the same thing every time I look at you.” Andrew grins and kisses Amber before pulling her in for a hug that she takes in feeling comfort in his warmth and kindness.

Later

After prepping her for surgery Amber assists Amelia in Gillian’s brain surgery to fix her Arnold-Chiari malformation. During the entire time Gillian was yelling because it was the only thing that could relieve her headache to Amber’s ire as her ears are still stinging from the close proximity. Amber is in the O.R. retracting as Amelia does the craniotomy.

Amber exhales in relief, “I swear I was close to doing the craniotomy myself in pre op just to get her to shut up.”

Amelia chuckles, “Like you’ve never yelled at anyone in this hospital until their ears bleed. Maybe you can consider this karma.”

“I only yell when someone deserves it. Like you nephew this afternoon.” Amelia looks up taken back and Amber explains, “He yelled at Dorian’s friends in the middle of the lobby and told them they were making things worse. I didn’t make that big of a scene when I was an intern and believe me I’ve had visitors in the waiting area that were actually making things hard for the patient.”

“Intern year is hard.” Amelia reminds Amber as she pulls a piece of the skull back, “And his friends are ignoring him and treating him like the plague so there’s that.”

“It doesn’t mean he has to take it out on James and Fiona or me for that matter and I am his chief resident. Maybe you can remind him that tonight with a smack to the head.”

“What did he say to you to warrant a smack?”

Amber keeps retracting with a frown, “He said I was a control freak who abandons her family the first mistake they make. Jackass. I mean look I know I can be a hardass on them but that’s only because it’s the only thing that can get through their thick skulls and actually be doctors. I’m just waiting for Adams to do that but no he makes it his mission to piss me off and integrate himself in my private family matter.”

“You mean about you not telling your mother your pregnant?” Amber looks up surprised that Amelia knows, “Word travels around fast and Adams is just angry right now and when me and his uncle got angry, we just pushed people away when really we wanted them to be there for us in our time of need.”

“And I thought me and Alex sucked in communication.” Amelia chuckles, “But he doesn’t have the right to think he knows why I haven’t actually told my mom the news. He didn’t live my life so he shouldn’t so quick to judge or take out his issues on me.”

Amelia nods, “Your absolutely right I will talk to him…so how come you haven’t told your mom about Lucy?” Amber raises an eyebrow at her, “I mean don’t get me wrong I have my own issues with my mother to the point where I didn’t tell her I had a brain tumor but that was because she missed my wedding. I guess you got a reason for not telling your mom she’s about to be a grandma.”

Amber chuckles bitterly, “How much time have you got?”

Amelia looks down at the exposed brain, “Well we’re waiting for the cranial pressure to swell down so I got time.”

Amber sighs before starting, “She was never really good with major events or minor ones for that matter. She couldn’t handle bad news at all, she would make it about herself and skip her meds. On the good days she would be in bed staring at nothing and the bad days she would be a human wrecking ball just destroying everything in her wake. My brothers basically had to raise me and hid me from her as best as they could. I know they did their best but she was beautiful so she didn’t have trouble finding a man. It was easy for her but horrible for her kids, especially her 8-year-old daughter. I would wake up and there would be some asshole of the month in the kitchen and my mom passed out in bed.” Amelia looks at Amber in pity, “I even had a routine where I would sneak out through my bedroom window and run away on my brothers 10 speed bike.”

Amelia frowns behind her mask, “Aww Amber that sounds awful.”

“Yeah, it was. Now you can see why I am reluctant to invite her into my daughter’s life. She’s just gonna make it about herself like she always does.”

“She might surprise you, mine did when I told her and my son gets a grandma about 5 times a year.”

Amber snorts, “She failed miserably as a mother I don’t think she’s gonna do well as a grandma.”

“Okay are there any moments of your childhood that weren’t straight from a horror story? Was your mom always so awful?”

Amber sighs, “…No she had one good year when I was a kid. She was a librarian so in that year we would hang out and play hide and seek in the stacks and she would let me read on top of her desk. It was the only year I felt like I had a mom and not a mental patient.”

“So, focus on that. Your mom is doing better now and she’s the person she was that year. She might have given you some pretty bad memories but she gave you some good ones too. Maybe this time she can give your kid more good than bad and thrive in grandmotherhood. Show your kid that even a messed up family like hers has love and joy.”

Amber looks at Amelia is thought before getting back to the surgery.

That Night

Amber sits on the king-sized bed with Lucy in her lap wearing black silk pajamas and Lucy in a pink onesie. On the bed beside them is an old converse shoe box with photos and other items inside it instead of her black converse that she wore out years ago. She decided to stroll down memory lane with Lucy so she can show her that even in a dark family like hers there’s still happy photo worthy moments in documentation.

“What do we have in here? What can mommy show you?” Amber gasps as she pulls out a photo of her at 15 wearing a Sandy Dee Summer’s Night costume for her high school production of Grease, “Wow look at this Lucy this is your mommy back when she was in theater.” Amber sings the famous song, “Summer loving happened so fast. I met a girl crazy for me.” Amber giggles at the memory, “Let’s hope you get my vocals instead of your dad’s.”

“Hey, come on I’m not John Travolta but I can rock the leather jacket and gelled back hair.” Amber sees Andrew outside the door grinning at them in his black tank top and gray pajama bottoms before hopping in and sitting beside his family. He digs into the shoebox, “Let’s see what else we can make fun of your mommy for.”

“Oh, don’t be so sure buddy because I got some pretty embarrassing pictures of you courtesy of Zia Carina.” Amber pulls out a photo of a young Andrew smiling and covered in marinara sauce causing them to laugh, “She told me how you spilled two jars of tomato sauce on yourself when you tried to reach a high shelf.”

“Yeah, your daddy was a little clumsy as a kid Lucy.” He looks at his daughter in Amber’s lap who holds a photo looking at it inquisitively, “Hopefully you don’t get that from me.”

“Oh, look at this.” Amber shows Lucy a photo of Aaron in his high school baseball uniform, “You know your uncle was so bad at baseball that he asked me to let him play in the sandlot with me and the other neighborhood boys. I tried telling him no because I knew he would embarrass me but he was persistent. He said he wanted to beat the rival baseball team but really, he just wanted to impress the girls in his class. Worked his way up to MVP though.” Lucy reaches out and touches the photo of her uncle Aaron, “That’s your uncle Aaron in a nutshell, loved to prove me wrong.”

Andrew smiles at her and pulls out a small and worn-out Matilda book from the box, “Your mom was a massive bookworm when she was little like you. She used to hang out at the library with your grandma and just scour the shelves for the next read.”

Amber grins and holds the book, “Yeah, your grandma Helen used to read me this during bedtime when I was little. She always liked to read me books about smart girls because that’s how girls are supposed to be written.” Lucy babbles and Amber pulls out a photo of herself at 8 years old in a hospital bed with white gauze wrapped around her head. Despite this she is smiling wide in the picture with Alex next to her grinning his cool guy grin, “That’s when mommy had a crush on Ryan Sheckler and thought she could do an ollie on her board just like him. But a visit to the ER and 12 stitches on the cranium proved me wrong. Don’t let the ‘I’m cool’ grin fool you; your uncle Alex was a mess before we took this photo. He badgered the doctors and the nurses and told them to run tests for any neuro injuries.” Amber grins at that memory, “He acts tough but he’s as soft as a marshmallow once you get past the crusty shell. You’ll see that just like I did.” Amber kisses Lucy’s head while Andrew grins at the sight holding Lucy’s tiny hand that is holding a photo. Amber digs into her box, “I don’t think we have a picture of your grandma in here…how about we call her and ask her for one?” Amber looks at Andrew who is taken back by this turn but stays supportive.

“Are you sure you want to call her?”

Amber inhales and looks at Lucy who holds a tiny mushroom plush, “Yeah why not. Let’s call her.” Amber pulls her phone out while Andrew moves Lucy from her lap to his as he watches Amber dialing the number and holding the phone to her ear, “It’s ringing…hey mom it’s me.” Andrew stays quiet as he observes hoping it goes well, “Yeah it has been a long time. I don’t know if you got my last text…” Amber chuckle sheepishly and scratches her head, “No I didn’t think you did, you rely on your home phone more than cell.” Andrew purses his lips at his theory being proven right while Amber talks to her mom on the phone, “Well listen that text was to tell you that me and Andrew were pregnant…no I’m not pregnant now I was about a year ago and seven months ago we had a baby. A little girl…I can imagine it’s shocking hearing about this just now sorry…her name is Lucia, we named her after Andrew’s mom.” Andrew grins at that kissing the top of Lucy’s head, “We’re calling her Lucy…Do you want to talk to your granddaughter? I can put her on for you if you want…okay.”

Andrew looks down at Lucy who looks at Amber blankly, “Do you want to talk to grandma?”

Amber moves the phone next to Lucy’s ear and smiles at her, “Say hi to grandma bambina.” Lucy babbles over the phone Amber is holding and her parents look at each other with grins on their faces over Lucy finally meeting her grandma.

[spookypotato]

Cool, Baby Blue, Tell me what I'm gonna be

Happy birthday Wyo! I hope you can still manage to have as good of a day as the circumstances allow. You're a wonderful person and a so, so talented writer. I'm sure you knwo that, but doesn't hurt to tell you again.

I wrote you a little something for your birthday, I hope you enjoy it :)

Carina (@moonofthenight) gave me some inspiration, ideas and the title from Baby Blue by Luke Hemmings

Universe by you (@prince-simon)

cw: spice references, food, gender feelings

“Honey, I’m home,” Simon yelled in a slight melody into his and Wille’s apartment. Even after all these months, he still couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that they were actually living together. Wille was living with him. They were living together, in Madrid, in the apartment he’d bought. Wille was-

“You’re ridiculous!” was all that could be heard until footsteps followed, growing louder until Wille was behind him, circling his waist with his arms. Simon moved his hands so he could link his fingers with Wille’s. “You love it.”

“I do,” Wille groaned into Simon’s neck, making the other shiver. He did love it. It reminded him of where he was. He was home. Simon was his home.

“I love you,” Simon whispered back. Wille loosend his grip a little to let his finance turn around and kissed his nose. “I love you, too.” He hadn’t gotten tired of repeating those words yet, he hoped that feeling would last forever.

Then Simon started squirming in his embrace for no apparent reason and Wille just started snickering, looking at his fiance questioningly.

“I,” Simon proclaimed as if he was the best person on earth - Wille would completely agree with that, “have gotten you a gift!” Simon turned back around and held a paper bag out to Wille triumphantly, glowing like the impersonation of the sun. When Wille didn’t move he pushed the bag into his arms, smiling at him expectantly.

“You didn’t need to get me anything,” Wille murmured to himself, barely audible, while already taking the bag properly and peering inside. It was fabric. Some kind of clothing, probably. It had grabbed his attention and he swifty pulled the light blue something out of the bag.

“I thought you might want your own, “ Simon told him stepping closer to Wille holding out the crop top in front of him, “Not that I don’t love you in mine, don’t get me wrong,” his fiance smiled, closing his arms around Wille’s waist from the side, looking at the graffiti text that had been printed on the front, “but this is more your size, little prince.” He emphasised the last two words, that were also in front of Wille’s eyes, printed on the crop top he’d just gotten. The bottom was lined with lace and Wille let his fingers brush against it. Simon got up to his toes, clearly wanting a kiss, but Wille couldn’t stop staring at the shirt. He felt the other place a light peck on his cheek, before standing next to him again. “Do you like it?”

The words got Wille out of his head, enough to turn to Simon, still gripping the shirt in his hands, but throwing them around Simon in an embrace. “Thank you,” he mumbled into his shoulder. He could feel Simon rubbing circles across his back. He was not going to cry, it was just clothing.

Clothing that wasn’t something he would have been brave enough to buy for himself. He loved wearing Simon’s crop tops, having a piece of his fiance with him, the comfort of his smell. But they were Simon’s. They weren’t his. This, this was his. As could easily be read by anyone, but Wille didn’t really care about the ridiculous lettering on the front. He’d told Simon how fondly he remembered every time he was a bit more daring with his clothing and he also mentioned that he’d liked the feeling of lace against his skin, after he’d tried on one of the tops Wilma had forgotten at their place after a visit. He had been embarrassed when Simon had found him in it, but Simon’s reaction had let him forget more than just why he was feeling embarrassed. Somehow, it felt right. He felt prettier than with any perfectly tailored button down.

And now he owned a crop top with lace and his boyfriend’s pet name for him on the front. And suddenly he just couldn’t hold the tears in any longer. Laughing and crying at the same time, he leaned further into Simon.

Simon’s body shook with a laugh, “I’ll take it you like it?” He moved his hands to gently card his fingers through Wille’s hair. Wille only nodded into his shoulder.

After a few minutes Wille looked up, beaming, tears forgotten, drying on his cheeks. Simon looked at him in slight confusion until- “I’m gonna try it on!” and with that Wille ran out of the room.

How did he manage get the cutest fiance the world had to offer?

Simon heard Wille shuffling back into the hallway before he saw him. He could hear Wille was nervous by the way he was walking, but what he saw when he looked up to his face was utter delight.

“It’s perfect,” they both said at the same time, then laughed, Simon looking at Wille and Wille looking at himself in the mirror they had in their hallway. Walking towards where Wille was standing, he moved behind him, about to wrap his arms around him again, then thinking better of if, letting Wille (and himself) admire the view, placing his hands on Wille’s hips instead.

“Thank you,” Wille said again. That’s really most of what was going on in his head. His mind was swimming with thoughts of how pretty he felt and how weirdly, this felt better than what he was always told he was the right thing to wear, but the thing that was drowning out all of these was appreciation. Appreciation for the man behind him and how comfortable he felt being around him. How accepted Simon made him feel, how right.

Simon then wrapped his arms around Wille’s waist, over exposed skin, parts of it covered by the lace. He kissed along Wille’s neck, “You’re welcome, mi amor. You look lovely.”

They stood there for a while, Wille brushing over the soft material from time to time, focusing on the feeling of the print, cool against his chest, the lace against his waist, his fingers linked with his fiance, hands dropped on their sides. He let them swing beside them, until he let go, turned around and kissed Simon. How did he ever get so lucky?

-

Wille woke up to Simon’s bare back pressed to his front. Memories from the last night came back into his mind and he decided it would probably be better to get up now, before he wouldn’t leave the bed at all for the next few hours. They needed food after all.

Wille walked to the door of their bedroom slowly, picking up some underwear that was laying around on the floor, putting it on and walking to the direction of the kitchen, closing the door as quietly as he could.

Just putting some toast in the toaster and cutting up some fruit, he let his mind wander to the day before, less risky for those thoughts to come back just yet, when he didn’t have his naked boyfriend in bed next to him.

He remembered the feeling of looking at himself in the mirror in that crop top. His own, finally. It was a different feeling wearing Simon’s. This one was his. It wasn’t like he’d thought about the way he dressed and how he wanted to dress a whole lot before. How that was possibly linked to a part of himself he wasn’t quite ready to explore. He did want to try out more things. Maybe not just look through the men’s section in stores, but walk into the women’s section with Simon, who had never since he’d known him given a shit about the gendered labels on the clothes he was buying. His rule was easy, if he liked it, he liked it, didn't matter where in the store it was placed.

Just as he put the cut up fruit into a bowl and the plates with the toast on the tray with it, he heard footsteps approaching him. “Good morning, mitt hjärta,” Wille said with a chipper tone, he knew Simon would act annoyed at so early in the morning, but secretly his fiance adored seeing him this hapy, no matter what time of the day. Turning around to face his fiance, his breath caught in his throat.

He had expected to see Simon. He had expected that Simon would look quite adorable with his hair messed up from sleeping. He had expected Simon to look deadass gorgeous in the morning sun. What he had not expected was for his fiance to wear Wille’s crop top. He had been right with the adorable and the gorgeous, but Simon also looked incredibly hot. Wille wasn’t really the possessive type, but he had to admit that he felt oddly smug about seeing ‘little prince’ written across his fiance's chest.

“You okay there, little prince?” Simon asked, a smile broad on his face. Clearly he knew exactly what he was doing to Wille. He’d always known. Wille didn’t exactly answer, just put the rest of the breakfast onto the tray, taking his fiance’s hand and dragging him right back to where they’d both come from. Breakfast had to wait after all.

[d-targaryenshoe]

Past - Andrew Deluca

Summary: Andrew coming face to face with the person who'd almost became his wife.

Warnings: miscarriage, anger

Word count: 1477

Standing in the grey elevator, electricity sounded through your ears as you shared the space with three other visitors.

But you weren't here to visit your grandma after surgery? Or a family member? No you were here to visit the person that would've been your husband by now.

Coming to a halt the doors opened and revealed a man with eyes covered by a glasses and a beard covering his cheeks.

"Hello." The guy smiled, pushing his glasses a little further up his nose.

"Hi." You smiled back, holding the strap of your brown colored bag.

You recognized this male from somewhere. But you weren't going to remind him of it. Not just yet.

"I'm Levi, nice to meet you." He introduced himself, as he held his hand out towards you.

"Y/n, nice to meet you too." You nodded, releasing the strap of your bag and shaking his hand, being the friendly person you were.

"Here to visit?" Your eyes settled on the boy.

"I guess you can call it like that?" You slightly laughed, trying to hide the fact that your heart was pounding out of your chest.

"O-kay? You're nervous. Me too. Like a lot. So nervous that my glasses fell into a human body." Levi chuckled, as his cheeks reddened.

"Oh I'm so sorry?" You apologized with a chuckle, receiving a dismissing wave of Levi's hand.

"It's all good, but thanks." The doors opened of the elevator and your chuckle disappeared within a few seconds.

"Have a nice day y/n." Levi waved as he walked of with a chart covering his hands.

"Bye." You gave him one last nod, before you grabbed your cellphone out of your bag and tried to call your only hope.

"Hi, you've reached Carina. I'm so sorry I can't pick up the call right now because I am standing right behind you. GOTCHA."

You sighed loudly throwing your cellphone back in your bag before a ginger haired female walked up to you.

"Ma'am are you alright?" She looked worried and at the same time she took in your frustration.

"Yeah yeah I'm fine don't worry." You fake smiled before turning around and taking in your surroundings.

"Well fine then?" She frowned starting to walk away.

"Wait! Do you know where i can find Carina Deluca?" Your voice spoke softly, knowing this female was only trying to help.

"Well if you're looking for her, she's right over there." You looked over to where the female was pointing.

A female covered in pink scrubs and yelling through a phone when slamming her hand on the desk? Yeah you were looking for her.

"No! Are you deaf did i say 'yes'? Huh?! I said no!" She yelled through the phone as you walked up to the information desk. "𝓐re you moronic?"

"Well that's mean?" You mumbled, placing both of your hands on top of the desk as she dropped the phone.

"Y/n!?" A loud gasp was heard as the female looked you up and down when walking around the desk to draw you in a hug.

"You've got to be kidding me?!" Carina cursed, tilting her head to one side, placing her hand on your shoulder.

"I wish i was but I'm not this time." You promised with a shake of your head.

"Well you better not be, follow me come on." She grabbed your hand walking towards an office which walls were made of glass.

"Hunt, don't let anyone near me, I'm having family in my office?" Carina glared at the ginger haired man as she received a nod in response.

"Sassy as ever, how I've missed that." Staring out of the glass view on your right, you watched doctors arguing, laughing and walking.

"The fact that you're here as the new head of Cardio means that you miss more than just me." Your ex sister in law gave you a much meaningful look, placing a dark blue scrubs on the desk.

"Please don–"

"No, don't run from the truth y/n?" Carina frowned, placing your badge in your hand just as a female voice sounded through the room.

"Doctor Deluca your nee– I'm sorry I'll come back later." A brown haired woman stuttered ready to close the see-through door.

"No Wilson, you already bothered me, what's wrong?" The Italian female sighed throwing her hair into a ponytail.

"You're needed for the premature with heart surgery at 2 o'clock." Carina sighed, getting up. "Don't leave to Italy until I'm back okay?"

A snort left your body when your eyes were settled on the young brown haired female. The light blue scrubs and the nervous state you could tell she was an intern.

" I'm Jo Wilson and i-I'm just standing here just because?" The girl gave an awkward smile.

You got up from your chair and removed your watch from your wrist. " Y/n y/l/n, head of Cardio."

"Nice to meet you, could you help me out with a patient?" Jo blurted out, walking up to you and placing a cup of coffee in your hand what made you frown.

"Is this your way of convincing me, Doctor Wilson?" You raised an eyebrow but still decided to take a sip of the hot coffee.

"Is it working?" The brown haired female asked as her eyes were settled on her chart before handing it over to you.

"It did, what's the case?" You took another sip of your coffee before putting your hair up in a messy bun.

"A 13 year old who's stubborn and won't let me do a check up." The girl informed you when shrugging her shoulders.

"Well, let's get going then." You motioned for her to walk through the door and show you the way towards the patient.

"You are Andrew's fiancé aren't you?" Jo piped up when giving you a questioning glance.

"Ex fiancé." The answer glided over your lips as you held the medical chart close to your chest with a slightly heavy grip.

"Oh, okay? Here to the left." She mentioned as the both of you made a turn to the left while you were walking.

Coming to a halt you were met by a man and a woman in their 40's and a boy with crossed arms and a glare covering his face laying on a examination gurney.

"Seriously you brought another doctor in here, you think she'll heal me? The boy mumbled, throwing his parents a glare.

"Honey, just stay calm and let her do her job please." His mother placed a hand on his shoulder, trying to camm him down.

"Let me do my job, the sooner you'll be out here." Taking a hood of your stethoscope the cold metal was placed on the boy's chest. "Can you move your shirt up a little, i want to see if you have any pain."

As your hands were placed in the middle of his stomach you noticed him slightly pulling away in pain.

"She applied pressure on your pancreas and that hurts, so my question is, have you had any other complaints?" Jo piped up as your head was pointed in her direction.

"I've been drinking more, I've been having a blurred vision out of no where?" The teenager explained, knowing that if he wouldn't say it he would be here in the next week again.

"Wilson, i want you to do a FBS test, as soon as you have results, I'm the one you page." Leaving the room you saw papers laying on the floor before grabbing them in your hands and searching for the person they belonged to.

"Those were my-" his sentence was ended by noticing you standing in front in him. "You?"

" i guess I failed the job of avoiding you." You mumbled when you rubbed your forehead in annoyance.

"I guess that i failed the job of not seeing you ever again." He mumbled between his lips when he stared at the end of the hallway, avoiding your eyes.

"After or before we called off our engagement?" Tilting your head to the side you crossed your arms. " Or after i lost our baby?"

"Don't. Talk about that, ever again." He glared when pointing a finger at you as anger and sadness filled his eyes.

"You seriously dare to think all that didn't affect me?" Your voice slightly raised as you saw a nurse giving you a bewildered look.

"That baby and that ring on your finger meant everything to me Y/n." His voice slightly cracked when turning around.

"So you're just gonna walk away?"

"You walked away from me 2 years ago Y/N, i lost a wife and a child, I don't deserve any of that pain." And that were the words that left his lips before walking away.

He was over you.

But not over your lost baby

He'll never be.