#canon in ways that take all the onus off of ED to make himself a better person and puts it all onto other people 'forcing' him into a

[something-about-sunflowers]

We are literally not watching the same show istfg.

The man is a PIRATE. To say he would never CHOOSE violence is just. Blatantly incorrect. He reminisced fondly about gouging out somebody’s eye. Fang is SCARED of him. ‘When people see the flag they just surrender, I don’t even have to be on the boat’ is a complaint about nobody putting up a fight anymore. He WANTS a fight. I’m.

Can we please, PLEASE, rewatch the show without the rose-tinted glasses? Can we fucking acknowledge that there is a baseline of violence that is treated less seriously because this is a rom-com about pirates and its not always an indicator of who is a ‘bad evil person’ who must be condemned for committing said acts of violence? Ed can enjoy being violent and still not be okay with having killed his abusive father. The trauma there comes from the abuse and the fact that the murder was retaliation against said abuse. Killing your abuser is traumatizing. Hell, he can have trauma around murder and still be okay with violence because violence doesn’t inherently lead to/imply murder.

‘Ed doesn’t like/want to be violent and Stede is his hero saving him from the violent oppressive life of piracy’ is SUCH a flat fucking take. Its infantilizing, and frankly? Its boring. Its a boring read on such an interesting character with such an interesting relationship with violence.

[drwcn]

'The onus has never been on him,' that slapped so hard. It falls true in canon events too and that just hurts. 'You don't have a gege and I no longer have a didi,' you ripped out my heart from my already collapsing chest. Your words are so beautiful, author. You know where to strike and your aim is nothing but perfect. Also, I desperately want lxc to dismantle the tyrannical way the Lan Sect Elders operate. His husband's death & lwj's suffering would be the last straw, is that wishful thinking?

Hey friends! You’re too sweet! I lumped these two asks together because they kind of both address the same thing, which is the actions of the elders. On tumblr and on AO3, I’ve had a lot of friends really upset with the way the elders acted. Rightfully so, since they made our poor boy commit honour su*cide. 

However, I thought now is probably a good time to shed some light on the cultural and historical implications of their actions, and to perhaps play devil’s advocate a little bit. 

The truth is, what the elders did within context is not at all outrageous. In fact, given how I’ve set up the story, to ask Wei Wuxian to die was the only thing they could’ve done since Yunmeng Jiang was unwilling to accept a divorce. 

I will explain. 

Because historical Chinese society was very gendered, I invite y’all to imagine for one second that there is no magic in this AU. Imagine this is a historical au and imagine Wei Wuxian as a woman. (I hate the heteronormativity of it, but in the setting of the story, by marrying into Gusu Lan Sect, he essentially has cast himself in that gendered role. There are no same sex marriages historically that I can draw parallels with... as far as I know.)

I believe Jiang Yanli in part 3 explains some of this in her internal monologue. She also said that the Gusu Lan family is within their right to do whatever they want. Her last in chapter three was “.. then by the week’s end, A-Cheng could very well be the only brother she has left.” She knew right away that death was a possibility. 

You see, there is no forgiveness for any woman caught having an affair. No forgiveness of any kind. You will not find forgiveness from strangers, from public opinion, from your neighbour’s cousin twice removed. No one. In historical texts, 七出 (seven leaves) outlines the 7 reasons a man can reasonably divorce his wife. 

Reason #1 is if the wife is unkind/unfilial to her husband’s parents (Right here, you can see just how different the priorities were in ancient Chinese society, how seriously ancient society took “respect your elders”, and why the Elders of Gusu Lan have so much power. This sets the stage for some of my later points.) 

Reason #2 is no offspring. If she is unable to have children, her husband may also divorce her, although since Chinese society was polygamous until mid 1940s, this is usually not an issue because the wife can always just allow her husband to find a concubine. 

Reason number #3 is affair.   

I should also point out that “divorce” as we understand in modern society is not the same “divorce” that I speak of historically. Historically, there are two types of ending for marriages. 1) an amicable separation or so called “he-li” 和离, and 2)xiu 休. An amicable separation is almost always a huge negotiation, requiring the input of elders from both families. A man and a woman cannot just wake up one day and have an amicable separation. Also, amicable separations are typically to “save face” and is practiced by large gentry and noble families, like the Gusu Lans and Yunmeng Jiangs. As well, an amicable separation is usually done when the woman hasn’t done anything “wrong”, as in the 7 reasons indicated above. Anytime she has “committed” any one of the 7 “sins”, her husband is within full rights to “xiu” her without consulting anyone. A woman’s station in society doesn’t necessarily even save her from being “xiu”-ed, they just... take on different forms. An Empress for example can literally never be “xiu-ed”, BUT, if she does something wrong like...say for example she is a jealous lady who can’t do a good job managing the inner palace, the Emperor can “废后“ - as in abolish her of her empress status. She is probably confined to “the Cold Palace” 冷宫 (a desolated area of the palace that’s essentially a prison) for the rest of her life. If she did something VERY wrong, like say was caught having an affair, she may live (and be sent to the Cold Palace) if her maiden family is powerful/influential enough in court, but if her maiden family is just so-so, she is definitely 100% dead. She will usually be given 3 options: dagger, a white silk cloth, and a cup of wine. Basically, stab herself, hang herself or poison herself. 

Now, that’s an empress. From empress downwards, all women, noblewoman and princesses included, can be xiu-ed. 

I consulted my mother on this just to make sure I’m right, and she said, yeah, a woman divorced by her husband historically is a very serious outcome. Like.... “she could literally never face society again” kind of serious, so seriously in fact she “might as well be dead.” Her maiden family would not just...welcome her back with open arms. No. They’d send her off somewhere hidden away from sight. 

As a matter of fact, once a woman is found guilty of committing a serious infraction, affair being the most scandalous, her maiden family may not even stand up for her because....well... she did something “wrong”. It is seen as more righteous if they allow her to die because then it’s like... her death restored her honour or she at least was good enough to face the consequences of her actions (All bullshit I know, but it is what it is). In fact, some large families with good reputations they can’t afford to besmirch will actively disown her. 

Now let’s bring this back to Wei Wuxian. As Jiang Yanli mentioned in chapter 3, if Gusu Lan wanted to be a dick, they’d just divorced Wei Wuxian out right. That would’ve been the dick move. But they didn’t do that. They wanted to give the Jiangs an olive branch. As a matter of fact, had the affair just been just a thing within Cloud Recesses, the Lans would’ve allowed for an amicable separation, even though they were within their rights (technically) to divorce Wei Wuxian. But...for whatever reason (I mean... I know the reason, you don’t haha), the news of the affair became rapidly disseminated such that literally everyone knows. Now both families are in a sticky spot.  

One, Zewu-jun is a prominent cultivator. To be cheated on in historical terms is a thing to be laughed at (fragile egos of manhood I suppose). To Lan Xichen’s behaviour, you really can’t voice any criticism. He’s gone above and beyond what is culturally expected as kind. 

Two, the marriage is finished. Now that the affair is exposed, to continue would be a farce and cause more reasons for ridicule. 

I knew pretty much since I started writing this AU that if I exposed the affair, one way or the other Wei Wuxian was gonna have to “die” if I wanted any semblance of reality. 

The only other scenario where he wouldn’t have died is if Lan Xichen is allowed to marry concubines. Then, Gusu Lans could’ve just secluded (imprison) Wei Wuxian for the rest of his life. Any woman or man Lan Xichen marries thereafter still wouldn’t be his “wife” or “husband” because he technically never had a divorce. They would all be concubines, and I don’t think Lan Xichen is the kind of man to do that to someone he loves. Also, Lan Wangji would have lost any and all chances to be with Wei Wuxian since they will never let him out. In that case, wangxian is done. 

I know it doesn’t make sense from a modern stance point, but what the Elders did was not only “right” but “reasonable”. Was it kind? I would even make an argument for kind. They intend to bury and honour Wei Wuxian after death (and that’s very important because funeral and afterlife in this culture are taken very seriously), and they will allow Lan Wangji to send him off at the funeral. No family in historical China would do that. 

Within context, the Elders aren’t wrong. Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian made their bed, now they have to lie in it.