#can't write a snappy headline or subtitle to save my life

[nuttysaladtree]

Candidate for FALKIRK SEAT replaced FEET PICTURES on blog with more DEVASTATING photo, calls followers SHAGGERS

[insert weirdly grainy tabloid-esque side-by-side photos with a red circle around subject in question or something i guess]

Active on niche microblogging platform DEFUNCT and MORIBUND since 2013; totally random stranger on street interviewed just for this story calls candidate 'OUT OF TOUCH TUMBLERINA'

Falkirk’s new Labour MP has resigned from his position on Falkirk council, something he’s taken his sweet time to do.

Which means there’s going to be a by-election in my ward. Reckon it will be another labour replacement, but really there shouldn’t be.

I can’t even joke and say AyeforCouncillor because this blog would immediately come to light and I’d most likely be crucified by the daily mail.